0:00:02 > 0:00:03We said he would go mainstream, local.
0:00:03 > 0:00:04And how's that working out?
0:00:04 > 0:00:07We're doing all this to get your Mark back into mainstream.
0:00:07 > 0:00:09Because that's what Mark wants.
0:00:09 > 0:00:11I want you to come through this because you're you.
0:00:11 > 0:00:13And I want you to be there for me.
0:00:13 > 0:00:16We've always needed other people. You saw that before I did.
0:00:16 > 0:00:18I know. I just... I feel like I'm losing my boy.
0:00:18 > 0:00:21She's worried about you. Should she be?
0:00:21 > 0:00:24Just for a moment, I felt more at home with Sophie than I do with you.
0:00:24 > 0:00:28I did the right thing, Alison. I told you the truth!
0:00:28 > 0:00:31And as for your feelings, I'm going to have to have to guess, am I?
0:00:31 > 0:00:35Why do you always have to pick away at everything like that?
0:00:35 > 0:00:36I just wish...
0:00:36 > 0:00:39- You just wish what?- We could leave things alone for a bit.
0:00:39 > 0:00:41That's what we'll do.
0:00:44 > 0:00:51This programme contains some strong language
0:00:55 > 0:00:56MUSIC PLAYS
0:00:56 > 0:00:59# Gonna break out of the city
0:00:59 > 0:01:02# Leave the people here behind
0:01:02 > 0:01:05# Searching for adventure
0:01:05 > 0:01:09# It's the type of life to find
0:01:09 > 0:01:11# Tired of doing day jobs
0:01:11 > 0:01:15# With no thanks for what I do
0:01:15 > 0:01:18# I'm sure I must be someone
0:01:18 > 0:01:21# Now I'm going to find out who
0:01:21 > 0:01:25# Why don't you ask them
0:01:25 > 0:01:27# What they expect from you?
0:01:28 > 0:01:31# Why don't you tell them
0:01:31 > 0:01:34# What you are gonna do?
0:01:34 > 0:01:37# You get so lonely
0:01:39 > 0:01:41# Maybe it's better that way
0:01:41 > 0:01:44# It ain't you only
0:01:46 > 0:01:49# You got something to say
0:01:49 > 0:01:52# Do anything you wanna do
0:01:56 > 0:01:59# Do anything you wanna do
0:02:03 > 0:02:07# Don't need no politicians
0:02:07 > 0:02:10# To tell me things I shouldn't be
0:02:10 > 0:02:13# Neither no opticians
0:02:13 > 0:02:16# Tell me what I oughta see
0:02:17 > 0:02:20# No-one tells you nothin'
0:02:20 > 0:02:22# Even when you know they know
0:02:22 > 0:02:26# But they tell you why you should do
0:02:26 > 0:02:29# They don't like to see you grow. #
0:02:32 > 0:02:35All right. What have I missed?
0:02:35 > 0:02:36Just the ads and trailers?
0:02:36 > 0:02:37Dad, shush, shush.
0:02:37 > 0:02:41- "Haweli Curry House. Just two minutes from this cinema."- Ah!
0:02:41 > 0:02:43Can you start it again, Nicola?
0:02:43 > 0:02:45You want to get a dog or take up running.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47- What?- Walking on your own.
0:02:47 > 0:02:50Nobody does that, unless they're up to no good.
0:02:50 > 0:02:51What?!
0:02:51 > 0:02:53DOOR OPENS
0:02:58 > 0:03:00I thought he was round here watching Postman Pat with Emily.
0:03:00 > 0:03:02I had no idea you had him skivvying.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04He just likes doing it. It's quite a contained behaviour.
0:03:04 > 0:03:07I think it has to do with order and predictability.
0:03:07 > 0:03:08When did you film this?
0:03:08 > 0:03:11Oh, just one of the times he was round here.
0:03:11 > 0:03:14Well, he's a grafter, I'll give him that.
0:03:14 > 0:03:18Joe? Joe, look!
0:03:18 > 0:03:20Look at the pictures,
0:03:20 > 0:03:22look, all these people are putting different pictures on.
0:03:22 > 0:03:24Do you like playing with Emily?
0:03:24 > 0:03:27I like playing with Emily.
0:03:27 > 0:03:28What are your favourite games?
0:03:29 > 0:03:31Don't Dictate.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33What are your favourite games that you like to play with Emily?
0:03:33 > 0:03:35Don't Dictate.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37I'm sorry, Joe. I don't know.
0:03:37 > 0:03:40Penetration. 1978.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42# Don't dictate, don't dictate
0:03:42 > 0:03:45# Don't dictate, dictate to me. #
0:03:46 > 0:03:47Emily is good.
0:03:57 > 0:03:59CHILDREN'S TV PROGRAMME PLAYS
0:04:05 > 0:04:07It's no Lethal Weapon, but it does the trick.
0:04:07 > 0:04:09What's, er... What's it for, again?
0:04:09 > 0:04:12I'm presenting to a small group of doctors, health visitors
0:04:12 > 0:04:13and practice nurses.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15I want to give them some idea of the spectrum
0:04:15 > 0:04:16in Joe-type autism.
0:04:16 > 0:04:19"Joe-type autism"! He's a syndrome now, is he?
0:04:21 > 0:04:23Most people think of autism as one of two extremes,
0:04:23 > 0:04:26either a non-speaking child in distress or Rain Man.
0:04:26 > 0:04:28And Joe's a great example of...
0:04:28 > 0:04:30Yeah, great example(!)
0:04:30 > 0:04:34..of autism that can get missed, because Joe's autism is hidden.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36Well, there's nothing much hidden on what we've just watched.
0:04:36 > 0:04:40I think you and me would've been helped if our GP had seen something like this, don't you?
0:04:40 > 0:04:43- I've written down what I was going to say, as well, but I wanted you both to read it first.- Thanks.
0:04:43 > 0:04:46The bits of Joe, they're going to... they're going to stay the same, will they?
0:04:46 > 0:04:48That's the stuff you're going to use?
0:04:48 > 0:04:50Well, most of it, yes. That was the plan.
0:04:50 > 0:04:54- It captures the lad. There's no doubt about that.- Yeah, yeah, it captures him all right.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56- You don't think it does?- It does what you need it to do, Nicola.
0:04:56 > 0:04:59That is clearly what is important.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05I'd better get off, actually. Louise has got her...
0:05:05 > 0:05:07Well, it's a bathroom sink...
0:05:07 > 0:05:10It nails him to his autism. You do see that, don't you?
0:05:10 > 0:05:12It just shows Joe as he is.
0:05:12 > 0:05:13What, as you see him,
0:05:13 > 0:05:16or as you want him to be seen by your colleagues?
0:05:16 > 0:05:20Yes, to help them understand more about all patients with autism.
0:05:20 > 0:05:22You knew I was doing this presentation!
0:05:22 > 0:05:23No, no, no. No, no.
0:05:23 > 0:05:25Not like this, I didn't!
0:05:25 > 0:05:27Probably a U bend, actually. Hair and soap, I should think.
0:05:27 > 0:05:30If there's anything you want me to take out, anything that upsets you...
0:05:30 > 0:05:33All of it, Nicola! How about all of it?
0:05:33 > 0:05:34Paul!
0:05:35 > 0:05:37I'm going to be late picking him up.
0:05:37 > 0:05:38Hang on a second!
0:05:40 > 0:05:43Hey, hey, Nicola's just trying to help.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45I think her presentation will help.
0:05:45 > 0:05:46I don't get why you're being like this.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49She's turned our little boy into a freak show.
0:05:49 > 0:05:52No, she hasn't! I would never let anybody do that.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56Look, we can talk more about it tonight, yeah?
0:05:56 > 0:05:59I'll have to pack all of his stuff up at Eddie's.
0:05:59 > 0:06:00I'll probably stay over.
0:06:00 > 0:06:02Oh, right. OK.
0:06:02 > 0:06:05Dad, I passed! My driving test!
0:06:05 > 0:06:07- I passed! - Good for you, love. Good for you.
0:06:09 > 0:06:11What's up with Dad?
0:06:14 > 0:06:16Well done.
0:06:22 > 0:06:26ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO
0:06:31 > 0:06:33So do you think it's all right?
0:06:33 > 0:06:34About Joe?
0:06:34 > 0:06:35The footage?
0:06:35 > 0:06:37Yeah, it's good. Yeah.
0:06:37 > 0:06:39So, do you think it's all right for Nicola to show it?
0:06:39 > 0:06:41Dad was a bit upset by it.
0:06:41 > 0:06:44Yeah, but if, you know, if it helps...
0:06:45 > 0:06:49Yeah. You're right. I'll sort it with Paul.
0:06:49 > 0:06:52Let's just concentrate on you, instead.
0:06:52 > 0:06:58My brilliant girl. Passed first time. Just like your mum!
0:06:58 > 0:07:00Don't think this means we're buying you a car, though.
0:07:00 > 0:07:01Not till after uni, anyway.
0:07:01 > 0:07:03I wasn't thinking that, no.
0:07:03 > 0:07:05Well, you'll have enough expense with accommodation and fees and...
0:07:05 > 0:07:09Mum, I'm not going to university.
0:07:09 > 0:07:10What?
0:07:10 > 0:07:15I changed my mind. It's a waste of money and I can do drama here.
0:07:15 > 0:07:17I'm already helping out with the end of term show.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19I could get a job, earn some money.
0:07:19 > 0:07:21I'm not going to university.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25Well, Nicola's been trouble since day one,
0:07:25 > 0:07:29always picking away at stuff, but that's doctors for you, I suppose.
0:07:29 > 0:07:32Your waste pipe was clogged solid. If someone had
0:07:32 > 0:07:36shown me a film of Eddie at that age, I'd have put him in a sack
0:07:36 > 0:07:38and drowned him in the canal.
0:07:38 > 0:07:39Get in, you bastard!
0:07:39 > 0:07:42I've put, er, a new washer on it just to be on the safe side.
0:07:42 > 0:07:45You get that baby double threaded and you'll never get it off.
0:07:45 > 0:07:46I've had an idea...
0:07:50 > 0:07:53What I'm thinking is, now you've broke the back of your treatment...
0:07:55 > 0:07:58Well, what I'm thinking is...
0:08:06 > 0:08:08..this.
0:08:08 > 0:08:10What do you think?
0:08:10 > 0:08:12Be sure to send me a postcard.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15Once you're done with all this malarkey. Take your pick.
0:08:15 > 0:08:16Luxury villa.
0:08:16 > 0:08:19Hotel with award-winning breakfast bar.
0:08:21 > 0:08:24I-I mean Ralph as well.
0:08:24 > 0:08:26Or even the four of us if you want to bring your girlfriend,
0:08:26 > 0:08:28hey, Ralph?
0:08:28 > 0:08:33There are water parks nearby! Who can resist a water park?
0:08:33 > 0:08:35No planning ahead, Maurice, no jinxing it.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42Right.
0:08:45 > 0:08:48Louise? Do you want to come through?
0:08:56 > 0:08:58Bloody hell, she's hard to please sometimes, your mum, isn't she?
0:08:58 > 0:09:01- Yeah.- Good job you and me are here to cheer her up.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03We make a good team, you and me, don't we?
0:09:03 > 0:09:04Yeah. For now.
0:09:04 > 0:09:08Yeah. For now. What do you mean, for now?
0:09:08 > 0:09:10You won't be here when she's better.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13Why? Do you know something I don't?
0:09:13 > 0:09:18Mum won't be ill. She won't need you any more.
0:09:18 > 0:09:21Has she said something? Your mum?
0:09:21 > 0:09:22Is that what she's said?
0:09:33 > 0:09:35I'll put yours there, shall I?
0:09:35 > 0:09:36Thanks.
0:09:41 > 0:09:42Bit close to the edge, that one.
0:09:49 > 0:09:51Are you all right?
0:09:51 > 0:09:53Me? Yeah, fine, fine, yeah.
0:09:53 > 0:09:56Well, can you just stop jiggling around, then?
0:10:19 > 0:10:21All right, superstar!
0:10:21 > 0:10:22You made it.
0:10:22 > 0:10:23End of term.
0:10:25 > 0:10:26But not the end of me.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28Oh, I hope not.
0:10:37 > 0:10:38Oops.
0:10:40 > 0:10:42Right, shall we...? Come on, then.
0:10:42 > 0:10:44That's it.
0:10:46 > 0:10:50Well, it won't exactly be my recreational drug of choice.
0:10:52 > 0:10:53The new chemo drug, you know?
0:10:55 > 0:10:58At least it doesn't give me that prickling feeling like FEC.
0:11:00 > 0:11:01Just you I'm allergic to, now.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03Bye, Maurice.
0:11:05 > 0:11:06Not coming in?
0:11:06 > 0:11:08No. I've, er, got to get back to the Brewery.
0:11:08 > 0:11:11There's stuff going on there.
0:11:11 > 0:11:14And, er, you'll want to get your feet up, won't you?
0:11:14 > 0:11:16Yeah, yeah.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19I'll give you a call tonight, let you know how I'm getting on.
0:11:33 > 0:11:34All right, Uncle Eddie!
0:11:35 > 0:11:37Hiya, Joe.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39Half an hour till tea-time, Joe.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41You don't mind if we stay over tonight, do you?
0:11:41 > 0:11:43It'll take for ever to pack up his stuff.
0:11:43 > 0:11:46Cheers, mate!
0:11:46 > 0:11:48I, uh, hear you're not happy about Nicola's film.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50Ah, she called you, did she?
0:11:54 > 0:11:57Did you know she was filming Joe when he went round?
0:11:57 > 0:12:00You know what Nicola's like when she puts her mind to something.
0:12:00 > 0:12:02She filmed me on a kid's bike.
0:12:02 > 0:12:05Her intentions are good, you know.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08If you're going to talk shite, Eddie, make yourself useful.
0:12:08 > 0:12:12If Nicola can help people get a bit more understanding,
0:12:12 > 0:12:15then doesn't that help everybody, including Joe?
0:12:15 > 0:12:20Well, that's easy for you to say. Emily looks great in it.
0:12:20 > 0:12:23So that's what this is all about? The comparison?
0:12:23 > 0:12:25Cos that's just in your head, mate.
0:12:25 > 0:12:27It's not something me or Nicola would ever do!
0:12:27 > 0:12:28Wouldn't you?
0:12:28 > 0:12:30I do.
0:12:30 > 0:12:32And Alison does, all the time.
0:12:34 > 0:12:37I don't have a kid like Joe, but I've still got a kid,
0:12:37 > 0:12:41and I know it's different for you, but every parent wonders
0:12:41 > 0:12:43if their child's going to turn out all right.
0:12:43 > 0:12:47Every parent sees something in their child that they worry about.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50You've not got a monopoly on sleepless nights.
0:12:51 > 0:12:53Can we change the subject?
0:12:53 > 0:12:57I'm hoping that Holly and I might have sex for the first time tonight.
0:12:57 > 0:13:00What? You did ask me to change the subject.
0:13:00 > 0:13:02You didn't have to change it that much.
0:13:03 > 0:13:05I am not going to let you
0:13:05 > 0:13:07throw away the chance of a lifetime.
0:13:07 > 0:13:09It doesn't feel like the chance of a lifetime to me!
0:13:09 > 0:13:12It feels like something I was going to do because everybody else was doing it.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14You, lady, are going to university.
0:13:14 > 0:13:16You're too smart not to go to university.
0:13:16 > 0:13:19Too smart not to get into 50 grand worth of debt, more like.
0:13:19 > 0:13:21We can help with the money. It's still worth it.
0:13:21 > 0:13:24I don't want to go. And I didn't tell you because I knew you'd be like this.
0:13:24 > 0:13:26Look, I missed out on university because I had you,
0:13:26 > 0:13:27and I will always regret it.
0:13:27 > 0:13:30- Thanks.- No, I didn't mean it like that.
0:13:30 > 0:13:33I mean, look, all the reading. And the time for yourself.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35Just to grow up a bit, figure out who you are.
0:13:35 > 0:13:38And the choices it gives you. And the people you'll meet.
0:13:38 > 0:13:40Mum, please, go to university.
0:13:40 > 0:13:42You are clearly so in love with the idea.
0:13:42 > 0:13:44I am in love with the idea for you.
0:13:44 > 0:13:46Do you even have a plan for what you'll do instead?
0:13:46 > 0:13:48I'll work here. Full-time.
0:13:48 > 0:13:50And end up like me and Sophie? No, I don't think so.
0:13:50 > 0:13:52Rebecca, I know you, this is not what you want!
0:13:52 > 0:13:53How are you getting on?
0:13:54 > 0:13:57Good, yeah.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59It says, "All About Me."
0:13:59 > 0:14:00All about me.
0:14:00 > 0:14:04Cos that's what they want to know. All about you.
0:14:04 > 0:14:06What you'd like. For yourself.
0:14:06 > 0:14:08So just write that.
0:14:08 > 0:14:12- Fine, I take it back. You're not smart enough to go to uni. - Fine. So give me a job.
0:14:12 > 0:14:14No! Seriously. I won't. I won't help you waste your life.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16I'm going to Tom's.
0:14:16 > 0:14:18Your shift hasn't even started!
0:14:19 > 0:14:21SHE SIGHS
0:14:21 > 0:14:22What did I do wrong?
0:14:22 > 0:14:25You took her seriously.
0:14:25 > 0:14:26I have to. It is serious.
0:14:26 > 0:14:30She was engaged five minutes ago. Is she engaged now?
0:14:30 > 0:14:31Oh!
0:14:41 > 0:14:43Sorry.
0:14:43 > 0:14:45Nicola just sent me a little film of Emily before bed.
0:14:45 > 0:14:49It's fine. You don't have to apologise for being a doting father.
0:14:49 > 0:14:51No, I know. It's just...
0:14:51 > 0:14:53You know.
0:14:53 > 0:14:55There, it's off.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01You didn't have to choose curry, you know.
0:15:01 > 0:15:03You could've just said you didn't want sex tonight.
0:15:03 > 0:15:05Sorry?
0:15:05 > 0:15:09Curry. It's not...you know.
0:15:11 > 0:15:13It's very bloating.
0:15:13 > 0:15:14I see.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18So you're implying I chose curry to give me
0:15:18 > 0:15:21an excuse not to make love for the first time in our relationship?
0:15:21 > 0:15:24Yeah. It was a joke. Not a very good one.
0:15:24 > 0:15:27Because you think it's me that doesn't want to make love?
0:15:27 > 0:15:28So...
0:15:30 > 0:15:31I suppose.
0:15:31 > 0:15:35I find this stuff very difficult to say.
0:15:35 > 0:15:38It took me four years to leave the Scouts and I hated it
0:15:38 > 0:15:40since the first game of British Bulldog.
0:15:40 > 0:15:43Is that what you're finding hard to say, that you hated Scouts?
0:15:43 > 0:15:47I've wanted to sleep with you for months.
0:15:47 > 0:15:50And you always seem to be able to find a reason why you can't.
0:15:50 > 0:15:54So now I'm thinking it's maybe that you don't want to, at least not...
0:15:54 > 0:15:56not with me.
0:15:56 > 0:15:57And that's fine.
0:15:57 > 0:15:59Disappointing, but fine.
0:15:59 > 0:16:02I don't want to sleep with you?
0:16:02 > 0:16:03Really?
0:16:03 > 0:16:05That's a very interesting analysis.
0:16:05 > 0:16:08- Well, it's not as if the opportunity hasn't arisen, is it?- No, it isn't.
0:16:08 > 0:16:11But you've managed to come up with an excuse not to have sex with me at every turn.
0:16:11 > 0:16:13- Me?- You wanted to take things slow.
0:16:13 > 0:16:15Well, that's right. I didn't want to pressurise you.
0:16:15 > 0:16:19Then you thought I wanted to take things slow. You were tired, you thought I looked tired,
0:16:19 > 0:16:22you had a lecture to finish, to deliver, to recover from,
0:16:22 > 0:16:24you had to go back to the Lakes, you had to work in the morning.
0:16:24 > 0:16:28- I think you're being a bit one-sided.- You had a cold and you didn't want me to catch it.
0:16:28 > 0:16:31There was even that time I pretended I accidentally locked us in my flat
0:16:31 > 0:16:34and you started looking up emergency locksmiths on your phone.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36Yep, yep. I get the picture.
0:16:36 > 0:16:38Excuse me, mate. Can we get the bill, please?
0:16:38 > 0:16:40You had Joe staying and felt bad about leaving him
0:16:40 > 0:16:42and Alison on their own.
0:16:42 > 0:16:47- Thank you, sir.- No. Erm, I'll need to take a nought off that.
0:16:47 > 0:16:50- I was distracted.- ..a weekend away because there were roadworks on the M62.
0:16:50 > 0:16:53You hadn't changed your sheets and your tumble drier was on the blink.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56And my all-time favourite - your neighbour had his brother
0:16:56 > 0:16:59staying and you could hear them on the Xbox and it put you off.
0:17:01 > 0:17:06So, now we've cleared the air, shall we go back to yours?
0:17:06 > 0:17:10- We're not in a relationship any more. It wouldn't be appropriate. - Not in a relationship? Since when?
0:17:10 > 0:17:13- Think of it as a mercy killing, Eddie.- No...
0:17:13 > 0:17:16I didn't realise how nervous I was about committing to something new.
0:17:16 > 0:17:19I appreciate you feel obliged to go through the ritual of begging me
0:17:19 > 0:17:21not to do this, but I'd rather you didn't.
0:17:21 > 0:17:23You aren't here half the time, Eddie,
0:17:23 > 0:17:26and the truth is, when you are here, you aren't really here, either.
0:17:26 > 0:17:30Well, I'd say no hard feelings but you might just accuse me
0:17:30 > 0:17:32of coming up with another excuse.
0:17:46 > 0:17:48Hiya, Nicola?
0:17:48 > 0:17:50I was just wondering if Emily's still up?
0:17:50 > 0:17:54I wanted to say goodnight to her. Is that OK?
0:17:56 > 0:17:58Not disturbed you, have I?
0:17:58 > 0:18:00No. Not much.
0:18:01 > 0:18:03Just been for a walk, yeah.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35Rebecca? Rebecca?
0:18:35 > 0:18:37'Hey, it's Alison, leave a message.'
0:18:37 > 0:18:40It's me. I've been thinking.
0:18:40 > 0:18:45I don't want Nicola showing that film of Joe. Just don't.
0:18:47 > 0:18:48All right?
0:18:53 > 0:18:54I just don't.
0:18:55 > 0:18:57I'll see you tomorrow.
0:19:10 > 0:19:15Robots can already imitate emotional states.
0:19:15 > 0:19:18At what stage will we say they are expressing their own emotions?
0:19:18 > 0:19:21In fact, I know plenty of people who could learn a thing
0:19:21 > 0:19:23or two about expressing emotions from robots.
0:19:25 > 0:19:27Maybe those people are robots, too.
0:19:28 > 0:19:30Who knows?
0:19:30 > 0:19:33As you set off on your summer break, you may want to bear in mind
0:19:33 > 0:19:37that some robots are warmer than some people.
0:19:37 > 0:19:40But you're all young and may not know that yet.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44But one day you will.
0:19:44 > 0:19:46One day you will.
0:19:53 > 0:19:55- Side effects?- Yeah.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57- From chemotherapy?- Yeah.
0:19:57 > 0:19:59But you're not having chemotherapy, are you?
0:19:59 > 0:20:01No. But I was just wondering.
0:20:03 > 0:20:06Can it sometimes... Can someone's judgment get out of whack?
0:20:06 > 0:20:08Is that a side effect?
0:20:08 > 0:20:12Probably not expressed like that, but it can be, for sure.
0:20:12 > 0:20:13So if someone...
0:20:13 > 0:20:15"Someone?" Someone close, perhaps?
0:20:15 > 0:20:17If you like. I don't know. Being hypothetical.
0:20:17 > 0:20:18Of course you are.
0:20:18 > 0:20:23If someone said something like, hurtful, you know, depressing -
0:20:23 > 0:20:27could that be, like, not them, just the chemo drugs talking?
0:20:27 > 0:20:31Maurice, if you want me to prescribe you an anti-depressant, I will.
0:20:31 > 0:20:35You don't have to talk or open up about it. Just ask.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38If you want something more holistic, I hear there's
0:20:38 > 0:20:41a herbalist in Kendal with a sideline in hash brownies.
0:20:51 > 0:20:52Joe?
0:21:00 > 0:21:01Where's Rebecca?
0:21:01 > 0:21:04She stayed at Tom's. She's keeping out of my way.
0:21:04 > 0:21:07- Why?- She said she didn't want to go to university any more.
0:21:07 > 0:21:10- What?- And then she said she wanted a full-time job at the Fellside
0:21:10 > 0:21:13and I said that was out of the question and she stormed out.
0:21:14 > 0:21:18Well...why didn't you just go along with it?
0:21:18 > 0:21:19Yeah, that's what Sophie said.
0:21:21 > 0:21:24Maybe she had a point. Maybe you over-reacted.
0:21:24 > 0:21:26That's good, coming from Mr Storm Out.
0:21:26 > 0:21:29Hey! Except I stormed out for good reason.
0:21:29 > 0:21:33All right. Look, I did overreact with Rebecca. I handled it clumsily.
0:21:33 > 0:21:36But we've all been guilty of that.
0:21:36 > 0:21:37Can't we just talk about it?
0:21:37 > 0:21:42Look, I'm not having Nicola use Joe to get a foothold in the autism industry.
0:21:42 > 0:21:46She's giving a presentation to half a dozen staff at the health centre.
0:21:47 > 0:21:50Nicola's done something to help because she likes Joe.
0:21:50 > 0:21:54And because she knows how we struggled trying to get Joe's autism recognised.
0:21:54 > 0:21:57There's nothing on it that he doesn't do.
0:21:57 > 0:22:00And he comes across as a happy kid that makes his own choices.
0:22:00 > 0:22:01Even if those choices are unusual.
0:22:01 > 0:22:04So you're just going to go ahead and let her show it, then, are you?
0:22:04 > 0:22:07No, I'm not. I thought about what you said, and I am going to go with Nicola,
0:22:07 > 0:22:10and I will answer any questions about him and I will
0:22:10 > 0:22:13stamp on any misconceptions - you know what I'm like.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15Does that help reassure you?
0:22:15 > 0:22:19It sounds to me like you care more about helping Nicola
0:22:19 > 0:22:23than how Joe looks to a room full of strangers.
0:22:23 > 0:22:25I care about how well-informed
0:22:25 > 0:22:28strangers are when they meet Joe and kids like him.
0:22:28 > 0:22:31If you don't want Nicola to show the film, well, then, she won't,
0:22:31 > 0:22:33but you'll have to tell her why, because I don't understand.
0:22:33 > 0:22:36And I am trying to understand, Paul.
0:22:36 > 0:22:38Do what you want.
0:22:40 > 0:22:41Do what you want.
0:22:41 > 0:22:42Hey!
0:22:46 > 0:22:52Fine. Then I am going to go and get ready to help Nicola get a foothold in the autism industry.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08At least you've got some fruit, I suppose.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12The chocolate's for Eddie.
0:23:12 > 0:23:14Right. Well, I'm not here to judge.
0:23:16 > 0:23:18Do we need bleach, by the way?
0:23:18 > 0:23:19I don't know. Do you?
0:23:21 > 0:23:24How are you feeling?
0:23:24 > 0:23:25Not bad. Not bad, this time.
0:23:25 > 0:23:27Good.
0:23:27 > 0:23:28Not going to give me a theory?
0:23:29 > 0:23:31About what?
0:23:31 > 0:23:32Dosage, the treatment, my recovery.
0:23:32 > 0:23:35I'm a bit pushed, to be honest.
0:23:35 > 0:23:36Right.
0:23:37 > 0:23:39I rang last night.
0:23:39 > 0:23:41Did you? I must have missed you.
0:23:41 > 0:23:42I-I-I went to bed early.
0:23:42 > 0:23:43I was a bit under the weather.
0:23:43 > 0:23:45Oh, right, well, I'm sorry to hear that.
0:23:45 > 0:23:49OK. Bye, now. It's, er, good to see you up and about.
0:23:49 > 0:23:50You, too.
0:23:50 > 0:23:51How do you mean?
0:23:51 > 0:23:53You were under the weather. Last night.
0:23:53 > 0:23:54When you went to bed early.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19Might have overdone the popcorn a bit!
0:24:22 > 0:24:24Hey, have you started without me?
0:24:25 > 0:24:28Hey? What's happened so far?
0:24:34 > 0:24:35Right.
0:24:38 > 0:24:39That's it.
0:24:41 > 0:24:43Go on.
0:24:46 > 0:24:49SHEEP BLEAT
0:24:53 > 0:24:55# No-one tells you nothing
0:24:55 > 0:24:58# Even when you know they know
0:24:58 > 0:25:01# But they tell you what you should do... #
0:25:01 > 0:25:04As you can see, the child with autism may from moment to moment
0:25:04 > 0:25:08present a social face to the world appropriate to his age
0:25:08 > 0:25:11and development, and then when he feels
0:25:11 > 0:25:14the social demands are getting too great,
0:25:14 > 0:25:17might retreat to self-stimulating behaviours.
0:25:17 > 0:25:19This serves two purposes -
0:25:19 > 0:25:22comfort and distance.
0:25:24 > 0:25:26Joe, look, look at the pictures.
0:25:26 > 0:25:29Look, all these people are putting different pictures on.
0:25:29 > 0:25:34These aren't so much choices as ingrained patterns.
0:25:34 > 0:25:36Self-defence mechanisms.
0:26:11 > 0:26:13Here you are.
0:26:22 > 0:26:26So, here we see that despite parental intervention
0:26:26 > 0:26:30and attendance at a specialist school,
0:26:30 > 0:26:34a child on the spectrum will occasionally revert to tried
0:26:34 > 0:26:36and trusted behaviours from their early childhood.
0:26:39 > 0:26:41Come on, stop rocking.
0:26:44 > 0:26:47Stop rocking for me, Joe, please. Come on, have some popcorn.
0:26:51 > 0:26:52Joe? Listen.
0:26:54 > 0:26:57It's all right, just stop rocking. Joe?
0:26:57 > 0:26:58Joe?
0:27:01 > 0:27:04Just stop... Joe! Just stop, stop rocking.
0:27:04 > 0:27:06No, no, no... Joe...
0:27:06 > 0:27:07Eh, come here! Listen!
0:27:07 > 0:27:09Give us that!
0:27:11 > 0:27:15Eh, come on! Joe! Come back!
0:27:15 > 0:27:17Eh, listen, I'm sorry, Joe.
0:27:26 > 0:27:27Joe?
0:27:38 > 0:27:39That seemed to go all right, didn't it?
0:27:39 > 0:27:41Yeah, seemed to.
0:27:41 > 0:27:43I think Paul would have felt better about it
0:27:43 > 0:27:45if he'd seen how everyone responded.
0:27:46 > 0:27:50Probably, yeah. By eating sandwiches and drinking coffee.
0:27:50 > 0:27:53Oh, sorry. It's their lunch break.
0:27:53 > 0:27:55They've got to eat. I know, I get it.
0:27:55 > 0:27:57And it's their job, so...
0:27:57 > 0:27:58Are you OK?
0:27:58 > 0:28:00Yeah. Yeah.
0:28:00 > 0:28:02# Don't dictate, don't dictate
0:28:02 > 0:28:04# Don't dictate, dictate to me. #
0:28:11 > 0:28:12Was harder than I thought.
0:28:13 > 0:28:15Right.
0:28:15 > 0:28:19Just to sit there and watch Joe like that.
0:28:19 > 0:28:23Well, it was watching other people watching him, you know?
0:28:23 > 0:28:26It's not that they weren't interested in him,
0:28:26 > 0:28:30but...it was his behaviours they were looking at, it wasn't Joe.
0:28:32 > 0:28:35Does that make sense?
0:28:35 > 0:28:38Yeah. Yeah, it does.
0:28:38 > 0:28:40Yeah.
0:28:41 > 0:28:43I mean, I still think we were right to show it.
0:28:43 > 0:28:45I just didn't think it'd be that tough.
0:28:45 > 0:28:48Right, so you admit that you're wrong,
0:28:48 > 0:28:51but you're glad you showed it.
0:28:51 > 0:28:52Classic.
0:28:54 > 0:28:56I'm saying that...
0:28:56 > 0:28:59I'm saying that watching it at the health centre made me get it.
0:28:59 > 0:29:00I get how you feel.
0:29:00 > 0:29:03No, you don't, you don't, you don't get how I feel.
0:29:04 > 0:29:07I know we're supposed to embrace Joe's autism and promote it
0:29:07 > 0:29:12and-and-and claim that it's just... it's a different way of being human.
0:29:12 > 0:29:14It is a different way of being human.
0:29:14 > 0:29:15And he's wonderful.
0:29:16 > 0:29:21He is. And he's settled into his school.
0:29:21 > 0:29:24And he-he draws, and he paints and he writes stuff, and...
0:29:24 > 0:29:26and people like him.
0:29:26 > 0:29:30But does that mean that I have to pretend that his autism isn't a burden?
0:29:32 > 0:29:36Something that he is going to have to carry through his life?
0:29:36 > 0:29:39Does that mean that I wouldn't wish it away if I could?
0:29:39 > 0:29:44His autism isn't an optional extra, Paul. It's part of Joe.
0:29:44 > 0:29:45It's part of who he is.
0:29:45 > 0:29:46Yeah, and I hate it, Alison!
0:29:49 > 0:29:51That's what Nicola's film reminded me of.
0:29:51 > 0:29:54I love Joe, I do, but I hate his autism.
0:29:54 > 0:29:56I hate it.
0:29:58 > 0:30:00So you hate part of Joe.
0:30:00 > 0:30:02The part that makes his life harder.
0:30:02 > 0:30:04But it's the part that makes him who he is.
0:30:06 > 0:30:07It's Joe.
0:30:10 > 0:30:11Your son!
0:30:18 > 0:30:20HOOTING
0:30:26 > 0:30:29Wow. That's quite a statement.
0:30:29 > 0:30:31Yeah. Two fingers would've been cheaper.
0:30:31 > 0:30:34- It's great, isn't it?- I take it this has got something to do with Stuart?
0:30:34 > 0:30:36Yeah, I'm going to work for him!
0:30:36 > 0:30:39He says that I can keep it or I can do it up and sell it.
0:30:39 > 0:30:41And if I do a good job he's going to put another one my way.
0:30:41 > 0:30:44You're going to work for Stuart?
0:30:45 > 0:30:46HOOTING
0:30:50 > 0:30:53Ah, this just gets better.
0:30:53 > 0:30:54Paul.
0:30:54 > 0:30:58Come on, Dad, stop being so negative!
0:30:58 > 0:31:01It's everything I've ever dreamed of!
0:31:01 > 0:31:04What you got there, Becky, is an entry level vehicle.
0:31:04 > 0:31:07It's got a couple of dents, few miles on the clock, but,
0:31:07 > 0:31:09then again, haven't we all?
0:31:10 > 0:31:13I had a blue Type 2 Danbury on the lot last week.
0:31:13 > 0:31:15Literally beating them off with a shitty stick.
0:31:15 > 0:31:17- Literally?- Yeah.
0:31:17 > 0:31:19It's like a car and a house and a job all rolled into one.
0:31:19 > 0:31:22I could go anywhere. I could sleep in it. Cook in it.
0:31:22 > 0:31:23Comes with a chef, does it?
0:31:23 > 0:31:26Ha-ha. I could take mates to festivals.
0:31:26 > 0:31:29Lose your life going too fast on the way home.
0:31:29 > 0:31:30Is it insured?
0:31:30 > 0:31:31Fully comp.
0:31:31 > 0:31:33Does that mean yes? I think that's yes!
0:31:33 > 0:31:36I mean, it cost an arm and a leg to insure it at her age, but, er,
0:31:36 > 0:31:39can't cut corners, eh, Paul, when it comes to family?
0:31:39 > 0:31:40No.
0:31:40 > 0:31:43Especially if you've put them in a death trap in the first place.
0:31:43 > 0:31:46It is mad, Rebecca. You do understand that, don't you?
0:31:46 > 0:31:49What your dad's saying is that if it's what you want for now,
0:31:49 > 0:31:50go for it.
0:31:50 > 0:31:52If you can't go mad at your age, when can you?
0:31:52 > 0:31:54I don't know why I bother.
0:31:54 > 0:31:57Come on, Joe, let's go! You steer, I'll do the pedals!
0:31:57 > 0:31:58Joking!
0:32:02 > 0:32:04She just needed something to do, Paul.
0:32:04 > 0:32:06She looked a bit lost, to be honest.
0:32:06 > 0:32:08Thanks for your parenting tips, Stuart.
0:32:08 > 0:32:09Well, I've had some experience.
0:32:09 > 0:32:12You have! Yeah, how many is it now?
0:32:12 > 0:32:13Five. Six?
0:32:13 > 0:32:17- Paul.- No. No. It's fair enough. I've always had high testosterone.
0:32:17 > 0:32:21It's like a condition. You know there's actually a word for it?
0:32:21 > 0:32:23There is indeed.
0:32:23 > 0:32:26Look, I just thought she might need a bit of a project to keep her
0:32:26 > 0:32:28occupied while she works out what she wants to do.
0:32:28 > 0:32:29She's going to university!
0:32:29 > 0:32:31Yeah, I know.
0:32:31 > 0:32:34What, you don't really think she's going to stick at this, do you?
0:32:34 > 0:32:36Working for me? What, kid her age, with her brains?
0:32:36 > 0:32:38No chance.
0:32:38 > 0:32:39You-You don't know that.
0:32:39 > 0:32:41Yeah, I do.
0:32:41 > 0:32:44Look, I may not have certificates, but I'm a great judge of people.
0:32:44 > 0:32:47I mean, I-I chose Alison, didn't I?
0:32:49 > 0:32:52If she doesn't go to university, is it really the end of the world?
0:32:52 > 0:32:56I mean, look at us three. We turned out all right.
0:32:56 > 0:32:59You fell out with her. That's why she's out there now in a death trap.
0:32:59 > 0:33:00You sort it out. I'm off to work.
0:33:00 > 0:33:02What? Right now? Hang on. Hang on.
0:33:02 > 0:33:05- Look, Stuart, it's lovely to see you and everything, but... - Yeah, you, too.
0:33:14 > 0:33:15MUSIC PLAYS
0:33:15 > 0:33:17You go up to go right.
0:33:22 > 0:33:26You all right? You and Paul seem a bit...
0:33:27 > 0:33:29It's not great, no.
0:33:30 > 0:33:32What did I used to do to cheer you up?
0:33:32 > 0:33:34I don't think that's an option.
0:33:34 > 0:33:37The last time you cheered me up we ended up with Rebecca.
0:33:37 > 0:33:38Oh, yeah!
0:33:39 > 0:33:41Thanks for sticking up for her.
0:33:41 > 0:33:45Sometimes it takes someone from outside the family to point out the obvious, you know?
0:33:45 > 0:33:47Yeah, I do. It's never been you before today!
0:33:49 > 0:33:52Look, Rebecca's bound to go to university.
0:33:52 > 0:33:55You're her mum, and you should've gone.
0:33:55 > 0:33:57Thanks.
0:33:57 > 0:33:59And I'm sorry that, you know,
0:33:59 > 0:34:01I put the kibosh on all that by getting you up the stick.
0:34:03 > 0:34:05I could still go to university now.
0:34:06 > 0:34:08You could, yeah.
0:34:08 > 0:34:10Not right away.
0:34:10 > 0:34:12But I've-I've volunteered to help out at a primary school
0:34:12 > 0:34:14in Manchester next term.
0:34:14 > 0:34:17So, see how that goes, and then maybe do a course,
0:34:17 > 0:34:19teacher training or something.
0:34:19 > 0:34:21Volunteering? I don't get it.
0:34:21 > 0:34:23Yeah, no, I didn't think you would.
0:34:23 > 0:34:26If you're that keen on kids why don't you just have a couple more of your own?
0:34:26 > 0:34:27You're still just about young enough.
0:34:27 > 0:34:29Oh, thanks, thanks.
0:34:29 > 0:34:33No, I know you subscribe to the old "let's have another baby and hope for the best" model
0:34:33 > 0:34:35but I'm not sure that's really for me.
0:34:35 > 0:34:37Is that why Paul's got a cob on, because you're making career plans?
0:34:37 > 0:34:40No, he doesn't know. You're the only person I've told.
0:34:40 > 0:34:42Oh. Right.
0:34:44 > 0:34:45Right.
0:34:47 > 0:34:48Piss off.
0:34:53 > 0:34:56Ah, if you're going to give me a blow-by-blow account of last night's
0:34:56 > 0:34:58Sex Olympics, I'm not in the mood.
0:34:58 > 0:35:01Just as well. I got disqualified after three false starts.
0:35:04 > 0:35:08You know Nicola showed that fucking film at the health centre?
0:35:08 > 0:35:12The film? What film? Oh, Joe's film. Thanks for reminding me.
0:35:12 > 0:35:14I'd forgotten you didn't like it.
0:35:17 > 0:35:20Do you ever think maybe you're just going mad
0:35:20 > 0:35:23and that you've got about...EVERYTHING wrong?
0:35:23 > 0:35:26I've got a bunch of students from this morning who definitely think so.
0:35:26 > 0:35:28Oh, and then Rebecca rocks up in a campervan.
0:35:28 > 0:35:31Like I'm supposed to just nod along with it.
0:35:31 > 0:35:33Like I don't get a say.
0:35:33 > 0:35:35There's a day in every man's life
0:35:35 > 0:35:38- when he realises he's not his family's Michael Corleone.- Eh?
0:35:38 > 0:35:41Then there's a worse day you realise you're Fredo.
0:35:42 > 0:35:43The chocolate frog?
0:35:47 > 0:35:49See, my problem is I think of the right thing to say
0:35:49 > 0:35:52about a day after the conversation's happened.
0:35:52 > 0:35:56By the time you get home tonight you should have a zinger of a speech ready.
0:36:47 > 0:36:51For a film you hate, you aren't half watching the life out of it.
0:36:51 > 0:36:53It's not Joe. It's Rebecca.
0:36:54 > 0:36:56Oh, look at her.
0:36:58 > 0:37:00Just look at her!
0:37:05 > 0:37:08Do you know how many hours we've got of this girl of ours?
0:37:08 > 0:37:09I hate to think.
0:37:11 > 0:37:13Do you know how many hours we've got of Joe?
0:37:15 > 0:37:17It's different with a second child.
0:37:17 > 0:37:19You never take as many photos, you never do.
0:37:20 > 0:37:23We just stopped filming him, didn't we?
0:37:23 > 0:37:27Just... After the diagnosis, we just stopped filming him,
0:37:27 > 0:37:29and I think we both know why that was.
0:37:29 > 0:37:31Do we?
0:37:32 > 0:37:33Because we hated his autism?
0:37:34 > 0:37:36Except you didn't.
0:37:36 > 0:37:38I was the one that had a problem with it.
0:37:43 > 0:37:48It's taken me two years to get to where you were with Joe, Paul.
0:37:48 > 0:37:53Two years not to see it as a problem that I had to take on and solve.
0:37:54 > 0:37:55You were the accepting one.
0:37:57 > 0:38:01When I finally get to where I think you are, you've moved.
0:38:11 > 0:38:17# The calendar on your wall was ticking the days off
0:38:17 > 0:38:20# You've been reading some old letters
0:38:20 > 0:38:24# You smile and think how much you've changed
0:38:24 > 0:38:31# All the money in the world couldn't buy back those days
0:38:31 > 0:38:33# You pull back the curtain
0:38:33 > 0:38:37# And the sun burns into your eyes
0:38:37 > 0:38:40# You watch a plane flying
0:38:40 > 0:38:45# Across a clear blue sky
0:38:45 > 0:38:51# This is the day your life will surely change
0:38:51 > 0:38:58# This is the day when things fall into place
0:39:12 > 0:39:15# You could have done anything... #
0:39:20 > 0:39:25- Thought you didn't like him being filmed.- This is different.
0:39:25 > 0:39:28Does Mum know you've come round to her point of view?
0:39:28 > 0:39:30I haven't.
0:39:31 > 0:39:34For what it's worth, I think you might be half right.
0:39:34 > 0:39:37Half right? Really?
0:39:39 > 0:39:42I don't know how much he'll like it when he's 18, you know?
0:39:42 > 0:39:45Exactly.
0:39:45 > 0:39:48The problem is that I think Mum might be half right, too.
0:39:50 > 0:39:52But then, what do I know?
0:39:57 > 0:39:59OK.
0:39:59 > 0:40:03GP's letter. Teacher's report. Old plan. Speech therapy report.
0:40:03 > 0:40:06We just need to finish that and then we're good to go.
0:40:06 > 0:40:08I'm sorry I didn't get it all done.
0:40:08 > 0:40:09Are you OK?
0:40:09 > 0:40:12So, as long as we get the council to agree to the changes
0:40:12 > 0:40:15in the EHC plan, Mark will go to the college he wants.
0:40:17 > 0:40:18That sound good to you, Mark?
0:40:21 > 0:40:25Thanks, Alison. I just lost the will to live.
0:40:25 > 0:40:27Come on, how far did you get?
0:40:27 > 0:40:29Well, I know it's all supposed to be in Mark's words
0:40:29 > 0:40:31but I did write some of it myself.
0:40:31 > 0:40:32You and every other parent in the country.
0:40:32 > 0:40:36But he did write his own bit in the hopes, dreams and ambitions section.
0:40:36 > 0:40:37Great.
0:40:39 > 0:40:41Oh, I'd like to hear that.
0:40:51 > 0:40:52I wish to be happy.
0:40:54 > 0:40:57I hope to be a drummer in a band.
0:40:58 > 0:41:00I hope to have friends.
0:41:02 > 0:41:04I hope to have a girlfriend.
0:41:04 > 0:41:05And I hope to have children.
0:41:07 > 0:41:10A good day for me is when I say things
0:41:10 > 0:41:12and everybody knows what I mean.
0:41:12 > 0:41:16I would like to be cool, but my mum doesn't have the books.
0:41:17 > 0:41:20I would like the words to come slower,
0:41:20 > 0:41:22from outside and inside.
0:41:23 > 0:41:28I would like to go to college and hang out with other kids my age.
0:41:28 > 0:41:32I'd like them to be OK with having a big autistic lad for a friend.
0:41:32 > 0:41:34I would like that very much indeed.
0:41:38 > 0:41:40Amen to that.
0:41:41 > 0:41:43Amen to that.
0:41:55 > 0:41:57Morning, Maurice.
0:41:57 > 0:41:59You thinking about getting a dog after all?
0:42:01 > 0:42:03Hey, Maurice, do us a favour?
0:42:03 > 0:42:04Whoa, give over!
0:42:04 > 0:42:05Give us Joe in one word.
0:42:05 > 0:42:09- I don't like playing games at Christmas, I'm sure I don't want to do it now!- Come on!
0:42:09 > 0:42:12First word that comes into your head when you think of Joe.
0:42:16 > 0:42:19That is lovely, Ella. That's really coming on a treat.
0:42:21 > 0:42:24Shall we think about some music we could play while you danced?
0:42:25 > 0:42:29You're not really thinking about becoming a second-hand car saleswoman, are you?
0:42:29 > 0:42:33I have to do something. Mum and Dad need me to stay.
0:42:33 > 0:42:34And do what?
0:42:34 > 0:42:36I'll pick something up.
0:42:36 > 0:42:38You will in that campervan, that's for sure.
0:42:38 > 0:42:40I can't go anywhere when they're like this.
0:42:40 > 0:42:43If something's wrong with them, then something will be wrong with Joe.
0:42:43 > 0:42:45And he can't sort them out, can he?
0:42:45 > 0:42:47And you can? With your track record?
0:42:49 > 0:42:52Do you know why we became friends on the first day of secondary school?
0:42:54 > 0:42:56A weakness for mascara?
0:42:56 > 0:42:58Well, yes, that,
0:42:58 > 0:43:02but because we both knew we were going to get away from this place.
0:43:04 > 0:43:08Lovely, lovely, lovely.
0:43:08 > 0:43:10Who would like to go next?
0:43:10 > 0:43:13Ramesh. And what will you be doing for us?
0:43:13 > 0:43:15- It's a magic trick.- Excellent.
0:43:15 > 0:43:18Except we all know there's no such thing as magic.
0:43:18 > 0:43:20Well, I wouldn't argue with that so far.
0:43:22 > 0:43:24# Don't push too far
0:43:24 > 0:43:27# Your dreams are china in your hands
0:43:27 > 0:43:30# Don't wish too hard Because... #
0:43:30 > 0:43:32You just have to stay around here
0:43:32 > 0:43:35and you stand a high chance of becoming dull.
0:43:35 > 0:43:37Never the case for me, but for you.
0:43:37 > 0:43:38I'll take that risk.
0:43:38 > 0:43:39# China in your... #
0:43:40 > 0:43:41Engine.
0:43:41 > 0:43:43What?
0:43:43 > 0:43:46When I'm out with him. He's got a good engine on him.
0:43:46 > 0:43:47That word you wanted.
0:43:47 > 0:43:49- "Engine?"- Yeah.
0:43:49 > 0:43:51It's taken you all day to come up with that?
0:43:51 > 0:43:52Has anybody else said it?
0:43:52 > 0:43:54No. Surprisingly.
0:43:57 > 0:43:58Come on.
0:43:58 > 0:43:59Engine.
0:44:04 > 0:44:05What're you doing here?
0:44:05 > 0:44:08University terms.
0:44:08 > 0:44:10It's not what I meant.
0:44:14 > 0:44:15Come on, Emily.
0:44:18 > 0:44:20If I was a woman I'm not sure I'd be happy about you having a key
0:44:20 > 0:44:22to your ex-wife's house.
0:44:22 > 0:44:25Sorry. I stopped listening after "If I was a woman." Give me a moment.
0:44:25 > 0:44:29You know what I'm saying. You've still got ketchup on your chin from last night's barbecue.
0:44:29 > 0:44:31I really, really don't know what you're saying.
0:44:31 > 0:44:34Holly. She must be pissed off with you, always running back here.
0:44:34 > 0:44:37Whatever Holly feels is no longer any concern of mine.
0:44:38 > 0:44:40Oh, well, welcome to the club.
0:44:40 > 0:44:41What?
0:44:41 > 0:44:43Louise. She's ended it.
0:44:43 > 0:44:45Ended it?
0:44:45 > 0:44:48It's not official yet, so don't go blabbing.
0:44:48 > 0:44:49No. No.
0:44:51 > 0:44:54She does know she's ended it, doesn't she?
0:44:56 > 0:44:58Let me get this right.
0:44:58 > 0:45:00Ralph said something, you didn't know what he meant,
0:45:00 > 0:45:02and this was three days ago,
0:45:02 > 0:45:05but you still haven't actually rung Louise to ask her?
0:45:05 > 0:45:10In 1876, a man called Alexander Graham Bell invented
0:45:10 > 0:45:15the telephone so that years later an emotionally repressed 58-year-old
0:45:15 > 0:45:20man could use his invention to phone his girlfriend and talk to her.
0:45:20 > 0:45:22I can't very well ask her now, can I?
0:45:22 > 0:45:25She's halfway through chemo. It wouldn't be fair.
0:45:25 > 0:45:28Well, as excuses go, that's got a nice fake ring of nobility about it,
0:45:28 > 0:45:30but it's still an excuse.
0:45:30 > 0:45:32And she was off with me in the supermarket.
0:45:32 > 0:45:34What is this? Fifth form? What're you going to do next?
0:45:34 > 0:45:37- Wheelies outside her house on your bike?- I'd been thinking.
0:45:37 > 0:45:41I suggested we book a holiday after the chemo, she shut that right down.
0:45:41 > 0:45:44She probably doesn't want to plan that far ahead. It's a tricky time.
0:45:48 > 0:45:50What was Mum like about that stuff?
0:45:50 > 0:45:53You know what your mum was like.
0:45:53 > 0:45:55She always liked to plan ahead.
0:45:57 > 0:45:58She even wrote her own funeral plan.
0:46:01 > 0:46:07Dad. Take it easy. You're both going through an awful lot.
0:46:08 > 0:46:11Everything's bound to be blown right out of proportion.
0:46:11 > 0:46:14Go round there, calmly.
0:46:14 > 0:46:17Think about what you're going to say. Then listen.
0:46:18 > 0:46:22Listen to what she's saying. What she's really saying.
0:46:22 > 0:46:27Not some half-baked interpretation of a throwaway remark from Ralph.
0:46:27 > 0:46:30And how about breaking the habit of a lifetime?
0:46:30 > 0:46:34Don't do anything rash. Don't say anything rash.
0:46:35 > 0:46:38You're right. I know you're right.
0:46:38 > 0:46:41I'm always right about other people's relationships.
0:47:51 > 0:47:53Are you still here?
0:47:53 > 0:47:54People keep saying that!
0:48:00 > 0:48:01It's Paul.
0:48:04 > 0:48:06So it is.
0:48:06 > 0:48:08The film.
0:48:09 > 0:48:12Yeah. The film.
0:48:12 > 0:48:16You just needed to warn me. Maybe, you know,
0:48:16 > 0:48:20before I saw it, maybe, the first time.
0:48:20 > 0:48:21I didn't know I'd have to.
0:48:21 > 0:48:24I thought you were OK with how Joe is.
0:48:24 > 0:48:27I am OK. I am OK with Joe.
0:48:27 > 0:48:28Good. Great. That's all cleared up, then.
0:48:28 > 0:48:30You know, Paul, I care about Joe.
0:48:30 > 0:48:34And I care about you and Alison and Rebecca.
0:48:34 > 0:48:36There we are, then. Misunderstanding over.
0:48:36 > 0:48:38And every bit of progress that has ever been made about people's
0:48:38 > 0:48:41attitude to autism has been made because people talked about it,
0:48:41 > 0:48:43were open about it and explained it.
0:48:43 > 0:48:45- Paul came here to apologise, Nicola. - No, I didn't.
0:48:45 > 0:48:48And that's all I'm trying to do. Move things on, make it better understood.
0:48:48 > 0:48:50Right.
0:48:50 > 0:48:51It was only ever for that group.
0:48:51 > 0:48:53I won't be showing it again.
0:48:53 > 0:48:56I was never going to be showing it again.
0:48:57 > 0:48:59Right, thank you for that.
0:48:59 > 0:49:02Oh, God! You don't have to thank me.
0:49:02 > 0:49:04You just have to know that I would never do anything
0:49:04 > 0:49:07to further my career if I thought it was at Joe's expense.
0:49:16 > 0:49:18You know, for all your tact and diplomacy, I thought
0:49:18 > 0:49:20it might have gone either way there, just now.
0:49:20 > 0:49:22Yeah, I think he could tell the alpha male in the room.
0:49:22 > 0:49:26- That'll be it.- And I know it's because he isn't OK with Joe.
0:49:26 > 0:49:29- Well, the film can't have helped if he is having problems.- Hm.
0:49:30 > 0:49:33No. You're right. It probably didn't.
0:49:33 > 0:49:35Hallelujah. She admits she's wrong.
0:49:35 > 0:49:36I didn't say that.
0:49:36 > 0:49:38So it wasn't right, but it's not wrong, either?
0:49:38 > 0:49:41I was single-minded. That's how I work.
0:49:41 > 0:49:43I've always been an eye-on-the-end-result kind of woman.
0:49:43 > 0:49:45Well, that would certainly explain our sex life.
0:49:45 > 0:49:48I don't go out of my way to trample over everyone's feelings.
0:49:48 > 0:49:49- It's just...- A habit, I know.
0:49:50 > 0:49:52Yes.
0:49:52 > 0:49:54Like you turning up here every time you're at a loose end.
0:49:54 > 0:49:58Well, Emily's here. I don't think I need another reason, do I?
0:49:58 > 0:50:01No, I don't mind.
0:50:01 > 0:50:03Why don't you stay?
0:50:04 > 0:50:10Well, it'd be hard to move, now I've made myself comfy in this slough of despond.
0:50:12 > 0:50:14Got a late booking for a table of ten.
0:50:14 > 0:50:16The beetroot starters all went at lunchtime.
0:50:16 > 0:50:19Gary's in a state, it might involve fennel.
0:50:19 > 0:50:21See you later.
0:50:21 > 0:50:22Right.
0:50:22 > 0:50:24Is that all you're going to say?
0:50:26 > 0:50:29Well, what else can you can say about beetroot and fennel?
0:50:30 > 0:50:32Right.
0:50:32 > 0:50:33Look...
0:50:33 > 0:50:36it's not like I just woke up one morning
0:50:36 > 0:50:38and decided to feel this way.
0:50:38 > 0:50:41Really? Cos that's what it feels like to me.
0:50:41 > 0:50:44Cos you've never talked about it. We never talk about it.
0:50:44 > 0:50:48I don't want to talk about it. I didn't even want to feel it.
0:50:48 > 0:50:50I just... I wanted to bury it.
0:50:50 > 0:50:52Yeah.
0:50:52 > 0:50:55And bury us along with it.
0:51:13 > 0:51:15So Ralph said we wouldn't need you any more?
0:51:15 > 0:51:18And that's why you stopped talking to me?
0:51:18 > 0:51:20Well, I was in a bit of a tailspin, to be honest.
0:51:20 > 0:51:21I could see that.
0:51:21 > 0:51:23So why didn't you ask me what was up?
0:51:23 > 0:51:26Because I thought you might say that you'd had enough.
0:51:26 > 0:51:29That you were only sticking around out of a sense of duty.
0:51:30 > 0:51:31So what did Ralph mean?
0:51:33 > 0:51:35This has been a big change for Ralph.
0:51:35 > 0:51:39Me having...this, and you being around,
0:51:39 > 0:51:41and all we've ever said was that you were helping to look after me,
0:51:41 > 0:51:47so why wouldn't he think that once the chemo was over, we were over, too? So, are we sorted?
0:51:49 > 0:51:50Almost.
0:51:52 > 0:51:53Oh, right. What else?
0:51:55 > 0:51:58Gone very quiet. It's never a good sign.
0:51:58 > 0:51:59Well, it's obvious, in't it?
0:52:02 > 0:52:03Not really.
0:52:06 > 0:52:07I loved Sandra, you know.
0:52:09 > 0:52:11I know.
0:52:11 > 0:52:15Great marriage. Great, you know, bedroom stuff.
0:52:16 > 0:52:17Big reader.
0:52:19 > 0:52:22Argue like I don't know what.
0:52:22 > 0:52:24Good mum.
0:52:25 > 0:52:26Very strong legs.
0:52:28 > 0:52:32Good-natured. Smoothed things over after I've got everybody's back up.
0:52:32 > 0:52:34Never forgot anybody's birthday.
0:52:36 > 0:52:37Great dancer.
0:52:39 > 0:52:41I loved her.
0:52:42 > 0:52:44I loved her so much.
0:52:49 > 0:52:51So?
0:52:51 > 0:52:53So?
0:52:56 > 0:52:59Will you marry me?
0:53:03 > 0:53:05What?
0:54:02 > 0:54:04Good lad!
0:54:13 > 0:54:15Oh, all right, Joe!
0:54:18 > 0:54:20I know what you're doing!
0:54:34 > 0:54:36I want to look.
0:55:27 > 0:55:29Headphones.
0:55:29 > 0:55:30Punk.
0:55:30 > 0:55:32Neuro-atypical.
0:55:32 > 0:55:33Roof.
0:55:35 > 0:55:37Local.
0:55:41 > 0:55:43One-off.
0:55:43 > 0:55:45That's two words. You're supposed to be the clever one.
0:55:48 > 0:55:50Engine.
0:55:50 > 0:55:52Joe.
0:55:52 > 0:55:53Son.
0:56:38 > 0:56:39Welcome, ladies and gentlemen...
0:56:39 > 0:56:42to the Millcross Primary End of Year Show.
0:56:42 > 0:56:44Right now, it's me and your dad's
0:56:44 > 0:56:46responsibility, and we're fine with it.
0:56:46 > 0:56:48What if you and Dad aren't fine with each other, what then?
0:56:48 > 0:56:50- Let's not blame Joe. - Who shall we blame?
0:56:50 > 0:56:51It's us, Alison.
0:56:51 > 0:56:55We need to talk. For the next five minutes, I want you to talk like me and not like you.
0:56:55 > 0:56:56Brutally honest.
0:56:56 > 0:56:57How much trouble are we in here?
0:56:57 > 0:56:59I just want to run away.
0:56:59 > 0:57:01- From what?- From this, all this, from everything.
0:57:01 > 0:57:04All I've got is this, Paul. I can't imagine a world where you
0:57:04 > 0:57:06and Alison would ever not be together.
0:57:06 > 0:57:10Can we leave off the hide and seek now? I'm running out of energy.
0:57:10 > 0:57:12I feel like I've opened the door on us
0:57:12 > 0:57:15and all the bad stuff just... It-It's pouring out.