0:00:02 > 0:00:06- This show is fabulous.- I thought, that's the sort of programme I want to watch.
0:00:06 > 0:00:08It's really, really good fun.
0:00:08 > 0:00:10QI THEME TUNE PLAYS
0:00:10 > 0:00:11AUDIENCE LAUGHTER
0:00:32 > 0:00:34APPLAUSE
0:00:36 > 0:00:41Shall we get straight down to business? Question one. What colour is the universe?
0:00:41 > 0:00:44Why don't pigeons like going to the movies?
0:00:44 > 0:00:48Does the Pope eat beaver?
0:00:48 > 0:00:51Can you tell me what are coffee tights?
0:00:51 > 0:00:56Maybe a prudish person might place them over the legs of a coffee table.
0:01:01 > 0:01:04It is a pair of tights made of coffee, as it were,
0:01:04 > 0:01:06or at least with caffeine in them.
0:01:06 > 0:01:12Are there going to be other items of clothing made out of liquid? Like custard socks or...
0:01:12 > 0:01:15or a nice vodka hat.
0:01:15 > 0:01:18Now you've said custard socks, I want them now.
0:01:19 > 0:01:23You can't have custard socks till you've put on your gravy cardie.
0:01:25 > 0:01:30It seems unlikely that slipping on a pair of tights is going to dissolve a fat arse.
0:01:30 > 0:01:33At least it'll stop your leg going to sleep.
0:01:35 > 0:01:38Very good! Excellent.
0:01:39 > 0:01:43When I knew I was going to be a dad for the first time,
0:01:43 > 0:01:46I laboured under the illusion, since dropped, that I knew something.
0:01:46 > 0:01:50But I thought, obviously, I don't know everything
0:01:50 > 0:01:52so I will buy the entire Encyclopaedia Britannica,
0:01:52 > 0:01:54which is about nine yards long,
0:01:54 > 0:01:59and read all of it in order to become the best dad in the world.
0:01:59 > 0:02:04It was so boring and difficult to read that I kind of despaired about it.
0:02:04 > 0:02:07SHEEP BLEATS
0:02:07 > 0:02:09When I first had the idea for QI in the late '90s,
0:02:09 > 0:02:12I kept it to myself two years.
0:02:13 > 0:02:16We used to meet occasionally and John would tell me regularly
0:02:16 > 0:02:18that he had a big idea he wanted to impart.
0:02:18 > 0:02:20Then we'd get distracted, usually by beer.
0:02:20 > 0:02:26One fateful afternoon, he finally divulged the idea that was QI.
0:02:26 > 0:02:28QI is, first of all, a mission and a philosophy.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31It's a way of looking at the world which is different.
0:02:31 > 0:02:36So he said, "OK, I'll give you three examples of interesting things."
0:02:36 > 0:02:38For the first 21 years of basketball's existence,
0:02:38 > 0:02:42it hadn't occurred to anybody to cut a hole in the bottom of the basket.
0:02:42 > 0:02:46You had to get a stepladder to get the ball out.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49The second was the fact that kangaroos had three vaginas.
0:02:50 > 0:02:54The third was about the existence of these things called tardigrades.
0:02:54 > 0:03:01They live anywhere there's water, but, if they dry out, they can live for over a century
0:03:01 > 0:03:03in a state of suspended animation.
0:03:03 > 0:03:06You add water and they come back to life. I couldn't believe this.
0:03:06 > 0:03:08So this is QI Central.
0:03:08 > 0:03:11This is the key library of QI where I've been sitting for ten years,
0:03:11 > 0:03:14researching the most unbelievably obscure subjects.
0:03:14 > 0:03:17Over in this corner, we've got all the stuff about languages
0:03:17 > 0:03:20and slang, quotations.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23And, bizarrely, the Dictionary Of Minor Planet Names,
0:03:23 > 0:03:27where I discovered there are asteroids called Smith, Jones, Brown and Robinson.
0:03:27 > 0:03:32We had a lunch in Oxford where John gave me this big map
0:03:32 > 0:03:34of what he wanted QI to become.
0:03:34 > 0:03:38It was shops and it was a place to hang out and it was radio
0:03:38 > 0:03:40and it was television, it was multi-media.
0:03:40 > 0:03:45It was the idea that once you've got this idea that there's a way of making something interesting,
0:03:45 > 0:03:46you can apply it to everything.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49What happened is that John brought it to me
0:03:49 > 0:03:52and I was at the time running in-house production
0:03:52 > 0:03:54and it was an independent idea,
0:03:54 > 0:03:57it came with Talkback Thames.
0:03:57 > 0:04:00It was going to be called QI, because he'd listed all these facts
0:04:00 > 0:04:03and he found himself using the phrase, "That's quite interesting".
0:04:03 > 0:04:06Or people would say, "Oh, that's quite interesting."
0:04:06 > 0:04:10I basically said, contrary to the usual rules in this thing,
0:04:10 > 0:04:16"I'll help you develop it and make sure that at least a pilot gets made in some way."
0:04:16 > 0:04:18APPLAUSE
0:04:19 > 0:04:24Ladies and gentlemen, hello and welcome to QI,
0:04:24 > 0:04:28the quiz where the answers are much more exciting than the questions,
0:04:28 > 0:04:30but the questions are completely impossible.
0:04:30 > 0:04:33As I don't expect the panel to know the answers,
0:04:33 > 0:04:36I shall give credit purely on the basis that I find their replies interesting,
0:04:36 > 0:04:39regardless of whether they're correct or even relevant.
0:04:39 > 0:04:43The pilot was huge fun to write, because I had the whole of all the stuff
0:04:43 > 0:04:46I'd been researching for years. I could pick and choose.
0:04:46 > 0:04:49I'd cherry pick the best possible questions.
0:04:49 > 0:04:52In 1992, the French government relaxed the ruling on the list
0:04:52 > 0:04:55of what French children could be legally christened.
0:04:55 > 0:04:59Jean-Pierre, Marie-Claire, Jeanne-Marie, Tintin, blah blah.
0:04:59 > 0:05:02The following year, after relaxing these laws,
0:05:02 > 0:05:06the most popular name for a baby French boy was Kevin.
0:05:06 > 0:05:07LAUGHTER
0:05:07 > 0:05:11I remember Eddie Izzard was involved, and Alan.
0:05:11 > 0:05:14I got involved with QI because I met John Lloyd
0:05:14 > 0:05:18when he was directing commercials I did for Abbey National.
0:05:18 > 0:05:22- ADVERT:- Saving with Abbey National keeps my hair a part of me.
0:05:22 > 0:05:24Lloydy, as we called John Lloyd, called me and said,
0:05:24 > 0:05:28"The BBC really like it. They're going for it they'd like a series of QI."
0:05:28 > 0:05:31Jane Root, who was running BBC Two, ordered 16 shows at once.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34That's never happened to me in my whole career.
0:05:34 > 0:05:39It went from being four of us in a room, to a whole set,
0:05:39 > 0:05:42Stephen presenting the material that John had been working on
0:05:42 > 0:05:46and we had contributed to, and questions that we had come up with.
0:05:46 > 0:05:50- What was rectal inflation... - LAUGHTER
0:05:50 > 0:05:52..in Victorian England?
0:05:52 > 0:05:57I think it's when arseholes went right up in price...
0:05:57 > 0:06:00LAUGHTER ..and spiralling out of control.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03The price was brought down by a change of interest rates.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05Did the bottom fall out of the market?
0:06:08 > 0:06:12There was something really special here because the pilot is such fun,
0:06:12 > 0:06:15it's so alarmingly odd.
0:06:15 > 0:06:21What is the sixth most popular name for a baby boy in Germany?
0:06:21 > 0:06:22HE LAUGHS
0:06:22 > 0:06:24Er, Klaus.
0:06:25 > 0:06:28- No.- Adolf! - Oh, he said Adolf.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31- D'oh!- Minus ten. That's a minus-ten card.
0:06:31 > 0:06:34- It's got "ph" on it, that's not Adolf.- I know.
0:06:34 > 0:06:38The literacy of our research department is neither here nor there.
0:06:38 > 0:06:43Because, in those days, Stephen wasn't the national treasure he has since become.
0:06:43 > 0:06:47He was just some guy, who was very bright.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50People would say, "Is he that clever, Stephen?"
0:06:50 > 0:06:54I'd say, "Of course he's not. No-one could know all that stuff."
0:06:54 > 0:06:58QI's an odd programme, because it's hosted by Stephen Fry,
0:06:58 > 0:07:00who is the cleverest man in the world, anyway.
0:07:00 > 0:07:04Then he's provided with loads more information on cards, which he can refer to.
0:07:04 > 0:07:08Then he's got a script on the autocue for other bits he doesn't know
0:07:08 > 0:07:11and just in case something has slipped by his attention,
0:07:11 > 0:07:14there's somebody shouting in his ear with additional facts.
0:07:14 > 0:07:17Ah, we have late breaking news, as a matter of fact.
0:07:17 > 0:07:20When he stops like that, he's not trying to remember,
0:07:20 > 0:07:22he's listening to someone tell him it.
0:07:22 > 0:07:24Cruithne is pronounced "Cruinia"
0:07:24 > 0:07:26and it's actually Celtic.
0:07:26 > 0:07:29He knows virtually nothing. Do you know what he knows about? Wagner.
0:07:29 > 0:07:32Even before I did QI, people had this view of me
0:07:32 > 0:07:36as being a bit of a schoolmasterly sort of figure.
0:07:36 > 0:07:39Don't be put off by a young person knowing more than you.
0:07:39 > 0:07:43- You must be used to it by now. - I'm just mucking about, sir, sorry.
0:07:45 > 0:07:49Because he's such a teacher type, it makes me want to wind him up.
0:07:49 > 0:07:52Every time he looks around, I want to throw paper at his head.
0:07:52 > 0:07:55G-E-N-O-C-I-D-E.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57Oh, you're in trouble.
0:07:57 > 0:07:58LEE MACK GRUNTS
0:07:58 > 0:08:00ALAN GIGGLES
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Stephen Fry would be a really good teacher,
0:08:02 > 0:08:06because he won't whinge if you're being silly.
0:08:06 > 0:08:09If he was my teacher, I would be thrilled.
0:08:09 > 0:08:11And now I think a lot of the guests play up to it.
0:08:11 > 0:08:14Phill Jupitus and others in particular,
0:08:14 > 0:08:16love to mock my grown-up-ness, if you like.
0:08:16 > 0:08:20What are the beer goggles? What is the Latin term?
0:08:20 > 0:08:24- LAUGHTER - Beer goggles?- Yeah.- What are they?
0:08:24 > 0:08:28When you have the beer goggles on is when you fancy someone who normally you wouldn't fancy.
0:08:28 > 0:08:32- Oh!- So you would refer to someone as a "seven-pinter".
0:08:34 > 0:08:38Stephen doesn't have beer goggles, he has madeira pince-nez.
0:08:41 > 0:08:45With Stephen it would be, "Oh, you're a cracker. More madeira?
0:08:48 > 0:08:51"A small sherry?"
0:08:54 > 0:08:59Because I can't out-think, or sort of out-perform Fry,
0:08:59 > 0:09:04all I can do is flirt with him, which does make him go really...
0:09:04 > 0:09:08It's like he just turns into a Jane Austen character.
0:09:08 > 0:09:11Just these flashes of, "Oh, stop it! No! Don't!"
0:09:11 > 0:09:15How many muscles are there in your fingers? How many?
0:09:15 > 0:09:16# 20 tiny fingers. #
0:09:16 > 0:09:18One, if you play your cards right.
0:09:18 > 0:09:21KLAXON AND ALARM BELLS
0:09:33 > 0:09:34I cannot look at you.
0:09:34 > 0:09:35Oh!
0:09:35 > 0:09:40- Dreadful boy! I'm not going to pay any attention to you now.- I'll put the pencil in.
0:09:40 > 0:09:42APPLAUSE
0:09:43 > 0:09:46I like hitting on him. Terrible(!)
0:09:46 > 0:09:48HE LAUGHS
0:09:48 > 0:09:53Einigkeit und Recht und Freiheit fur das Deutsche Vaterland.
0:09:53 > 0:09:56Danach lasst uns alle streben,
0:09:56 > 0:09:59bruderlich mit Hertz und Hand.
0:09:59 > 0:10:02- I have an erection. - LAUGHTER
0:10:02 > 0:10:03He hasn't punched me yet,
0:10:03 > 0:10:06but I think Stephen, at some point, will probably...
0:10:06 > 0:10:10Because I like to disappear off into the distance.
0:10:10 > 0:10:13If I could stand on a planet and throw an Ewok
0:10:13 > 0:10:16into a lake of fart that would just be...
0:10:16 > 0:10:17LAUGHTER
0:10:17 > 0:10:21- That would be like... BRIAN COX:- You couldn't, because it would shatter.
0:10:21 > 0:10:23Even better!
0:10:26 > 0:10:29I could be tossing Ewoks into a lake of fart? Ah.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32Occasionally, he looks at me with that look of,
0:10:32 > 0:10:38"It's all very well, the fact that we're talking about putting monkeys on stilts, but..."
0:10:38 > 0:10:43He kind of goes, "Yes, the answer is..." Blah-de-blah. And it comes back to the thing.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45It is always a wonderful thing
0:10:45 > 0:10:47watching Stephen being terribly polite and affable
0:10:47 > 0:10:50while you're saying something incredibly foolish
0:10:50 > 0:10:53and knowing that he's about to hit you on the head
0:10:53 > 0:10:57with what can only be described as a rather beautiful fact.
0:10:57 > 0:11:01What do you call a left-handed lemon?
0:11:01 > 0:11:02A potato.
0:11:02 > 0:11:05No, but you're thinking along the right lines.
0:11:05 > 0:11:09We're talking about molecules and their arrangement.
0:11:09 > 0:11:11- You mean the opposite to a lemon? - Yeah.
0:11:11 > 0:11:14- Exactly, the mirror image of its molecular...- An orange?
0:11:14 > 0:11:18- Is the right answer. There's a lemon, obviously.- Seven points?
0:11:18 > 0:11:23- Seven points, that's your number. - Do they make scissors for both?
0:11:26 > 0:11:27Or just...
0:11:30 > 0:11:33Does a lemon...?
0:11:33 > 0:11:36It's along those lines, Johnny, yes.
0:11:36 > 0:11:41The arrangement of the aroma molecules is exactly the same, except a mirror image,
0:11:41 > 0:11:44and the result is as different a smell of a lemon to an orange.
0:11:44 > 0:11:47I think my favourite one is when he talked about
0:11:47 > 0:11:50his tailor at school. That's hilarious, yes.
0:11:50 > 0:11:53My prep school tailors were called Gorringe, funnily enough.
0:11:53 > 0:11:57- Where we got our uniforms made. - You had a tailor?!
0:11:59 > 0:12:01You had a tailor for a suit you wear when you're five?!
0:12:03 > 0:12:06Were you born in the 1850s?
0:12:06 > 0:12:08You had...
0:12:08 > 0:12:10I shall measure up, young sir!
0:12:10 > 0:12:12You had a particular outfitter,
0:12:12 > 0:12:14who was the school outfitter,
0:12:14 > 0:12:17which was a tailoring shop with school outfits called Gorringes.
0:12:17 > 0:12:21Which side does young sir dress on?
0:12:21 > 0:12:24Nothing you need to worry about!
0:12:24 > 0:12:28You should know that! It's written on the toilet walls!
0:12:28 > 0:12:31Heavens! Why did I even mention that?
0:12:31 > 0:12:33Want to get measured up for shorts?
0:12:34 > 0:12:36Lord!
0:12:36 > 0:12:40Would sir like to wear a cravat on the cross-country run?
0:12:43 > 0:12:44APPLAUSE
0:12:44 > 0:12:47People, I think, do...
0:12:47 > 0:12:49sometimes, erm, think either that I know everything,
0:12:49 > 0:12:52which is obviously preposterous,
0:12:52 > 0:12:54or that I pretend to know everything,
0:12:54 > 0:12:57which I really don't mean to do.
0:12:57 > 0:12:58He's immensely articulate,
0:12:58 > 0:13:00got just enough knowledge to get by.
0:13:00 > 0:13:03He can fool experts in their own field.
0:13:03 > 0:13:05But sometimes he'd get things wrong.
0:13:05 > 0:13:08OK, Stephen...
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Oh, yes?
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Oh, hello...
0:13:12 > 0:13:14- I have been waiting for this opportunity.- Oh, Christ!
0:13:14 > 0:13:17What do penguins in the Falkland Islands do,
0:13:17 > 0:13:19when RAF jets fly over them?
0:13:19 > 0:13:24BELL RINGS IN STYLE OF UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE BUZZER
0:13:21 > 0:13:24Fry, Cambridge!
0:13:24 > 0:13:29APPLAUSE
0:13:29 > 0:13:35- They look up and topple over, backwards.- Really?
0:13:31 > 0:13:35KLAXON SOUNDS
0:13:35 > 0:13:38Oh, Fry! You idiot!
0:13:39 > 0:13:44Alan and Stephen represent two different kinds of intelligence.
0:13:44 > 0:13:47They are both highly intelligent people,
0:13:47 > 0:13:49but they think in different ways
0:13:49 > 0:13:50and Stephen is a kind of learned,
0:13:50 > 0:13:54academic, thoughtful, you know, intelligence.
0:13:54 > 0:13:57It's a mixture of the terrible English class thing,
0:13:57 > 0:14:00of me being a sort of officery, Oxbridgy type,
0:14:00 > 0:14:02tall and English, and him being
0:14:02 > 0:14:06a sort of curly headed, slightly more Essex lad.
0:14:06 > 0:14:09Alan's is intuitive. Alan's isn't about knowing information,
0:14:09 > 0:14:12it's about bending information into new shapes.
0:14:12 > 0:14:15This documentary said, eventually the sun
0:14:15 > 0:14:18will explode or implode, or something,
0:14:18 > 0:14:19and everything will be gone.
0:14:19 > 0:14:22- That won't help Mars, will it? - Including Earth.
0:14:22 > 0:14:24No! On the way out, we have to stop at Mars.
0:14:24 > 0:14:28I thought you meant there was a services there!
0:14:28 > 0:14:31Someone trying to get you to join the RAC in the car park!
0:14:34 > 0:14:37Humans will leave this planet, Stephen, they will.
0:14:37 > 0:14:39The Wise One has spoken, ladies and gentlemen!
0:14:39 > 0:14:43I can't imagine the show would ever work without both of them,
0:14:43 > 0:14:45because they offset each other.
0:14:45 > 0:14:47Because just as Stephen has told Alan...
0:14:47 > 0:14:49The temperature ambit within which
0:14:49 > 0:14:52human sperm can survive, is quite narrow.
0:14:52 > 0:14:55..Alan will say something like, "Yes, Stephen..."
0:14:55 > 0:14:56Do sperms
0:14:56 > 0:14:58feel pain?
0:14:58 > 0:15:00LAUGHTER
0:15:00 > 0:15:04Thing is, nobody knows the answer to that, not the elves,
0:15:04 > 0:15:06not Stephen, not any professor in the world
0:15:06 > 0:15:09and that's what makes it so delicious,
0:15:09 > 0:15:11is that even Stephen, the national treasure,
0:15:11 > 0:15:13doesn't know everything.
0:15:13 > 0:15:16'The funny thing was, he wasn't even first choice for host.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18'The guy I really wanted was Michael Palin.'
0:15:18 > 0:15:21I remember having a very nice lunch,
0:15:21 > 0:15:23in which you pressed the case
0:15:23 > 0:15:27for me to do a new sort of television programme,
0:15:27 > 0:15:31which you described quite, I have to say, quite messianically.
0:15:31 > 0:15:33I just thought, "Perhaps I can't do this.
0:15:33 > 0:15:35"This is a serious thing to do, being a quizmaster,
0:15:35 > 0:15:37"being in control of people."
0:15:37 > 0:15:39I think in the back of my mind I thought,
0:15:39 > 0:15:42"If I'm the quizmaster, I am, once again, the neutral,
0:15:42 > 0:15:45"straight man in the middle. Really, I just wanted to be silly.
0:15:45 > 0:15:47I tried to persuade him for two hours.
0:15:47 > 0:15:50He wasn't going to do it.
0:15:50 > 0:15:52I went back to the office and it was a disaster,
0:15:52 > 0:15:54and I said to the research team,
0:15:54 > 0:15:56"We've screwed this up, it's not going to work."
0:15:56 > 0:15:58I didn't know what to do.
0:15:58 > 0:16:00It took me 24 hours to think,
0:16:00 > 0:16:01"I'll just go and beg Stephen,
0:16:01 > 0:16:04"if he'll sit in as the chairman, just for the pilot."
0:16:04 > 0:16:08It never occurred to me for a minute to be offended by the idea
0:16:08 > 0:16:10that Michael Palin was first choice,
0:16:10 > 0:16:14because I can exactly see that he'd have been brilliant at it, actually.
0:16:14 > 0:16:17I could just see that this was going to be something
0:16:17 > 0:16:19which you couldn't just do,
0:16:19 > 0:16:22because QI has become this enormous brand.
0:16:22 > 0:16:24It's all over the place.
0:16:24 > 0:16:27So I knew I wasn't getting into something that would be
0:16:27 > 0:16:31Wednesday afternoons and then I could go and do a bit more travelling.
0:16:31 > 0:16:33One lesson that ought to be taught at school,
0:16:33 > 0:16:36is to embrace disaster when it happens, because 20 years later,
0:16:36 > 0:16:40what seemed like a disaster at the time, might not seem like one then.
0:16:40 > 0:16:42Much of John Lloyd's planning
0:16:42 > 0:16:45about how QI was going to work, he kept from me,
0:16:45 > 0:16:49and this, I discovered since,
0:16:49 > 0:16:52was a deliberate ploy, because he needed the fall guy,
0:16:52 > 0:16:54he needed an idiot.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56No, no, not white, middle-class people.
0:16:56 > 0:17:00- That's me!- Not doing that!
0:17:00 > 0:17:03LAUGHTER
0:17:03 > 0:17:06No! No! So embarrassing!
0:17:06 > 0:17:10All the time, now, I realise in his mind's eye,
0:17:10 > 0:17:14there was a huge dunce's cap sitting on my head.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17I think, first time I was on, Alan turned to me and went,
0:17:17 > 0:17:19"I'm glad you're here. Usually, I'm the thick one!"
0:17:19 > 0:17:23I thought that was the best compliment I'd ever had
0:17:23 > 0:17:26and I might use it on my posters for the tour.
0:17:26 > 0:17:28"Jesus! I thought I was thick" - Alan Davies.
0:17:30 > 0:17:34There are 923 English words that have a C-I-E in them.
0:17:34 > 0:17:37- Do we have to name them all?- No.
0:17:37 > 0:17:39You're let off. But name some.
0:17:39 > 0:17:42- Ceiling!- No, that's C-E-I!
0:17:42 > 0:17:45LAUGHTER
0:17:45 > 0:17:48- C-E-I, that's what you said!- No, no!
0:17:48 > 0:17:50If it's I before E except after,
0:17:50 > 0:17:53we're looking for words where E follows C, aren't we?
0:17:53 > 0:17:55No. The rule is
0:17:55 > 0:17:59it should be C-E-I, according to that.
0:17:59 > 0:18:03- But you're saying it's wrong! - I'm saying there are 923 examples...
0:18:03 > 0:18:06I know one which it isn't. Ceiling. That's not one.
0:18:06 > 0:18:10- Ceiling isn't one!- No! - Ceiling isn't one you're looking for!
0:18:10 > 0:18:11Yes! I want ones I am looking for!
0:18:11 > 0:18:14So I'll repeat my answer when I say not ceiling!
0:18:14 > 0:18:16I'm looking for ones I am looking for.
0:18:16 > 0:18:20- Looking for ones you're looking for. - So give me a C-I-E!- Ceiling?
0:18:20 > 0:18:24My God, I may explode at any minute.
0:18:24 > 0:18:27Are you incapable of rational thought?
0:18:27 > 0:18:29You cannot be that stupid!
0:18:29 > 0:18:32You cannot be!
0:18:32 > 0:18:34What happened, particularly in early shows,
0:18:34 > 0:18:37was people didn't know what to do, they didn't know
0:18:37 > 0:18:39whether to try and get the answer right,
0:18:39 > 0:18:43they didn't know whether it mattered, they felt it did matter
0:18:43 > 0:18:46because there are cameras and people, and you look stupid.
0:18:46 > 0:18:48So I used to just...
0:18:48 > 0:18:51talk a lot, answer, hit the buzzer and say stuff,
0:18:51 > 0:18:53to keep the ball in the air, really.
0:18:53 > 0:18:56Tell you something about oranges...
0:18:56 > 0:18:57they're not the only fruit!
0:18:57 > 0:18:59They're not the only fruit!
0:18:59 > 0:19:03Alan...he's got such an interesting role in this.
0:19:03 > 0:19:06Because he doesn't appear to know...anything.
0:19:06 > 0:19:10I'm amazed he can function as a human being.
0:19:10 > 0:19:12But he somehow adds value.
0:19:12 > 0:19:15He asks questions that I would be embarrassed to ask.
0:19:15 > 0:19:19If you all of the fish and the whales
0:19:19 > 0:19:22and everything out of the sea,
0:19:22 > 0:19:24how far down does it go?
0:19:24 > 0:19:27Alan plays it exceptionally well,
0:19:27 > 0:19:29but whenever I am on, that's...
0:19:29 > 0:19:31The only real
0:19:31 > 0:19:35sort of, competitive spirit for me is,
0:19:35 > 0:19:38try and out-stupid Alan.
0:19:38 > 0:19:41That's what I aim to do, is steal the crown from him.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44I love the fact that Alan buries his head in his hands
0:19:44 > 0:19:46whenever we come up with Aristotle or Pliny.
0:19:46 > 0:19:48We start with Alan's favourite subject,
0:19:48 > 0:19:50which is the Ancient Greeks!
0:19:50 > 0:19:52Oh...!
0:19:52 > 0:19:56He just finds the classical philosophers
0:19:56 > 0:19:59so annoying, because they're so wrong about everything,
0:19:59 > 0:20:01and yet, of course, they were so right!
0:20:01 > 0:20:04What we call blue, they called something else.
0:20:04 > 0:20:06They didn't call anything blue.
0:20:06 > 0:20:08- They didn't look up, ever? - No...
0:20:08 > 0:20:10- They didn't have colours? - No word for blue.
0:20:10 > 0:20:13They had colours, but didn't have a word for blue.
0:20:13 > 0:20:16- No word for blue? What did they say for sky?- Bronze.- Bronze?
0:20:16 > 0:20:19Yes, they called it the bronze. Homer called it bronze colour.
0:20:19 > 0:20:21I've got no time for these Greeks!
0:20:21 > 0:20:24- Without them, you wouldn't be here!- That's so rubbish!
0:20:24 > 0:20:27- You say this every week! - Because it's true!
0:20:27 > 0:20:29Because without logic, mathematics,
0:20:29 > 0:20:32harmony, democracy,
0:20:32 > 0:20:35- justice...- That's got nothing to do with people shagging,
0:20:35 > 0:20:37- ending up with me! - There wouldn't be television,
0:20:37 > 0:20:40and without television, you are nothing.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43I know that better than anybody!
0:20:43 > 0:20:47You know, to watch Alan shake his head in disgust, is just wonderful.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50The moment I say Pliny, I can see his heart sink!
0:20:50 > 0:20:53The alternative cure for incontinence, which is to
0:20:53 > 0:20:56knock back a glass of sweet wine mixed liberally with the ash
0:20:56 > 0:21:00of a burnt pig's penis, then urinating
0:21:00 > 0:21:03in your, or your neighbour's dog's bed!
0:21:03 > 0:21:05None of this is made up!
0:21:05 > 0:21:06The pig would be there going,
0:21:06 > 0:21:11"I'm glad to see you're still pissing!"
0:21:11 > 0:21:13LAUGHTER
0:21:13 > 0:21:17He is, of course, I feel hesitant in revealing this to the world,
0:21:17 > 0:21:20he is highly intelligent!
0:21:20 > 0:21:23- Quite interesting thing?- Yes, go on!
0:21:23 > 0:21:25- Lady mosquitoes bite you, suck your blood.- True.
0:21:25 > 0:21:29Male mosquitoes, not quite so dangerous.
0:21:29 > 0:21:33- True.- Point?- You've made a point, but you're not going to get one!
0:21:33 > 0:21:36There's another part of him
0:21:36 > 0:21:38that's wonderfully bloody-minded and, as I say,
0:21:38 > 0:21:42he's like a little spaniel puppy constantly running into the mirror!
0:21:42 > 0:21:44What's the world's longest animal?
0:21:44 > 0:21:47BUZZER
0:21:47 > 0:21:49Is that me?
0:21:49 > 0:21:51It'll be the blue whale.
0:21:51 > 0:21:56KLAXON
0:21:56 > 0:21:59I think the time I laughed most on QI,
0:21:59 > 0:22:01was when Julian Clary was on,
0:22:01 > 0:22:05and he started talking about meeting the Queen and doing a pooh!
0:22:05 > 0:22:08I had wind when I met the Queen.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11And did you release it?
0:22:11 > 0:22:14I had to and unfortunately, I shat myself.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18You heard it here first, ladies and gentlemen.
0:22:18 > 0:22:20- APPLAUSE - So?
0:22:20 > 0:22:24Well, she'd...she'd been there herself!
0:22:25 > 0:22:27Had she?
0:22:27 > 0:22:30She just looked, gave me that look and moved swiftly on.
0:22:30 > 0:22:33And I tried to get rid of it by internal squeezing,
0:22:33 > 0:22:35as can be done.
0:22:35 > 0:22:38Are the muscles a little lax down there at the moment?
0:22:38 > 0:22:41LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:22:41 > 0:22:43STEPHEN GROANS
0:22:44 > 0:22:47During the filming, I'm slightly having kittens
0:22:47 > 0:22:49because it's the one part of the process
0:22:49 > 0:22:51which is totally out of control.
0:22:51 > 0:22:56- Graculus is a jackdaw. - No. Jackdaw is Corvus monedula.
0:22:56 > 0:23:00Yes, that's another word. It's the actual Latin name.
0:23:00 > 0:23:02The Latin name for a jackdaw was graculus.
0:23:02 > 0:23:05OK, let's not fall out over this, Stephen.
0:23:05 > 0:23:07No, no. It's what the...
0:23:07 > 0:23:10- I'm saying real Latin. No, no. - LAUGHTER
0:23:10 > 0:23:12You might be interested.
0:23:12 > 0:23:17Because Roman people actually called birds things before they...
0:23:17 > 0:23:19LAUGHTER
0:23:21 > 0:23:23- Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. - APPLAUSE
0:23:23 > 0:23:25There's nothing down there.
0:23:28 > 0:23:33Aah! Ugh! Sorry about that. I am so sorry about that.
0:23:33 > 0:23:34That's all right.
0:23:34 > 0:23:38There's a portal into the underworld here, it's ridiculous.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42If it's one of your shows, a show you've written,
0:23:42 > 0:23:44then you're quite tense, really, going into it.
0:23:44 > 0:23:47We have rehearsals and then the main show starts.
0:23:47 > 0:23:49And you're really hoping the material
0:23:49 > 0:23:51will work for the panel,
0:23:51 > 0:23:55that they'll be able to sort of riff off it and come up with jokes.
0:23:55 > 0:23:59Talking of Christianity, Rich, could Jesus walk on custard?
0:23:59 > 0:24:01What? That...
0:24:01 > 0:24:05That sounds like a sarcastic question you would ask Jesus.
0:24:05 > 0:24:07"Oh, water? Eh, great. What about custard?"
0:24:07 > 0:24:09LAUGHTER
0:24:09 > 0:24:11It's not so much a question of, "Could he?"
0:24:11 > 0:24:13- You're saying he did? - He did, he did.
0:24:13 > 0:24:16It was very hard to stop him, actually.
0:24:16 > 0:24:18This was one - it's come out in research recently -
0:24:18 > 0:24:22this was one of the Lord's favourite pastimes.
0:24:22 > 0:24:24Out with the bread and fish,
0:24:24 > 0:24:27"Look what I've got for desert. Somebody hold my shoes."
0:24:27 > 0:24:30And he'd be, you know, he'd be doing it.
0:24:30 > 0:24:31Welcome, everybody.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34This is the first meeting for the research for the J series of QI.
0:24:34 > 0:24:36From the very beginning,
0:24:36 > 0:24:41I nicknamed the researchers on QI the Elves because I think of them
0:24:41 > 0:24:45as little nibelungen in the Ring Cycle with little pickaxes,
0:24:45 > 0:24:49mining at the mountain of knowledge and coming up with these little
0:24:49 > 0:24:51extraordinary shiny nuggets in little wheelbarrows.
0:24:51 > 0:24:54One of our researchers in the first series actually read
0:24:54 > 0:24:57the entire Albanian English Dictionary
0:24:57 > 0:25:00to get just two QI questions out of.
0:25:00 > 0:25:03If you really want to try and understand things
0:25:03 > 0:25:06and you want to get to the bottom of how things work,
0:25:06 > 0:25:09you have to ask really stupid, simple questions.
0:25:09 > 0:25:12They all come from different backgrounds, different disciplines.
0:25:12 > 0:25:14They are all different ages.
0:25:14 > 0:25:17They just have this one thing in common, an undimmable curiosity.
0:25:17 > 0:25:19We got two balls here, OK?
0:25:19 > 0:25:22You drop one ball here, it bounces down there.
0:25:22 > 0:25:24You drop another ball here, it bounces down there.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27What would happen if I dropped both balls together.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29One will go over there.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32I think you're probably right. I think you're probably right.
0:25:32 > 0:25:36- Wey-hey! - Giddy aunt!
0:25:36 > 0:25:41I think what makes it work is the combination of taking ideas
0:25:41 > 0:25:44that you're not normally allowed to talk about on television
0:25:44 > 0:25:47because they're considered difficult or esoteric or dull.
0:25:47 > 0:25:52This is where we found that calcium, amazingly, is a metal.
0:25:52 > 0:25:55And it is in fact the commonest metal in the human body.
0:25:55 > 0:25:57A great QI question.
0:25:57 > 0:26:01And giving them to a panel of brilliant comedians and presenters
0:26:01 > 0:26:06in such a way that they can find something you'll remember in it.
0:26:06 > 0:26:09Chelmsford has the largest burns unit in Europe.
0:26:09 > 0:26:14Oddly enough, the MP for Chelmsford West is Simon Burns,
0:26:14 > 0:26:17though because he got a Douglas at university, he is known as?
0:26:17 > 0:26:19- Third degree Burns. - GROANING AND LAUGHTER
0:26:21 > 0:26:26One of the really good things about QI is it seems
0:26:26 > 0:26:31to have tapped into an absolutely bottomless pit of trivia.
0:26:31 > 0:26:34We come up with ideas and questions
0:26:34 > 0:26:37of just things we find interesting.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39It's like good teaching, really.
0:26:39 > 0:26:42The good teacher you had at school who just finds
0:26:42 > 0:26:45an interesting way about talking about something
0:26:45 > 0:26:48that 1,000 other children will tell you is an incredibly boring subject.
0:26:48 > 0:26:52We don't worry about what people think about the questions,
0:26:52 > 0:26:56we just do what we like and we always think that if we find something interesting,
0:26:56 > 0:26:59everyone else will find it interesting as well.
0:26:59 > 0:27:02The blue whale's tongue is heavier than a whole elephant.
0:27:02 > 0:27:05Just one blue whale tongue is heavier than a whole elephant.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08Their hearts are the average size of a small family van.
0:27:08 > 0:27:10If you want to do a piece on gravel,
0:27:10 > 0:27:14it's up to us to go and find out there is something interesting to say about gravel
0:27:14 > 0:27:17and not say, "You can't do a piece on gravel, that's far too boring."
0:27:17 > 0:27:20You know, whether it is what carpets are made of
0:27:20 > 0:27:25or how fast the Earth spins around or whatever it might be,
0:27:25 > 0:27:28it's grist to our mill.
0:27:28 > 0:27:33Women have been shown to be able to smell fear.
0:27:33 > 0:27:35What this Viennese man did, he was called Grammar,
0:27:35 > 0:27:39he made a lot of women watch films, some of which were horror films.
0:27:39 > 0:27:42All of the women had pads under their arms.
0:27:42 > 0:27:44Then, other women smelt all of the pads
0:27:44 > 0:27:47and they could identify without fail
0:27:47 > 0:27:49the pads of women who had been frightened.
0:27:49 > 0:27:53Are you sure this isn't just some soft porn film?
0:27:53 > 0:27:58The QI Elves, they are either the best or the worst pub quiz team in the world,
0:27:58 > 0:28:03cos we all know really strange bits of information, often complementary.
0:28:03 > 0:28:07We know lots of stuff but we don't really know things.
0:28:07 > 0:28:09For example, erm,
0:28:09 > 0:28:11the capital of Honduras.
0:28:11 > 0:28:13Ask me what's the capital of Honduras.
0:28:13 > 0:28:15What's the capital of Honduras?
0:28:15 > 0:28:18Tegucigalpa. Actually, I got lucky with that one.
0:28:18 > 0:28:21Generally speaking, we're not good at that kind of thing.
0:28:21 > 0:28:24It's like the X-Men. Each one has their special superpower.
0:28:24 > 0:28:26I do animal genitalia.
0:28:26 > 0:28:29There's an interesting thing, their genitalia.
0:28:29 > 0:28:31LAUGHTER
0:28:31 > 0:28:33Give me the length of a blue whale's penis.
0:28:33 > 0:28:35A Nissan Micra.
0:28:35 > 0:28:38Give me the length of the blue whale's penis!
0:28:38 > 0:28:40- LAUGHTER - Give it to me now.
0:28:40 > 0:28:42APPLAUSE
0:28:44 > 0:28:47To be honest, I don't think I could manage quite that much, Stephen.
0:28:47 > 0:28:50- You've disappointed a man. - About that long.
0:28:50 > 0:28:53An arm's length.
0:28:53 > 0:28:55Oh, my dear fellow.
0:28:55 > 0:29:00- It's 16 foot long. 16 foot long. - LAUGHTER
0:29:00 > 0:29:02If the QI Elves remind me of any group of people,
0:29:02 > 0:29:06think of something like Bletchley Park where they cracked the Enigma code.
0:29:06 > 0:29:10You know, you have a strange mixture of chess players
0:29:10 > 0:29:12and pipe-smoking mathematicians
0:29:12 > 0:29:14and crossword puzzle-solving figures
0:29:14 > 0:29:17all coming together and bringing their expertise
0:29:17 > 0:29:21and their sideways views of the world
0:29:21 > 0:29:24and their eternal curiosity.
0:29:24 > 0:29:28So we have a meeting where we go through this huge basket of questions
0:29:28 > 0:29:31that we've put together and they are graded from one to five.
0:29:31 > 0:29:34One is straight into the show. Brilliant question, good subject.
0:29:34 > 0:29:38Two is a good subject but probably needs a bit of work on the question
0:29:38 > 0:29:42to give the panel something interesting and funny to do with it.
0:29:42 > 0:29:44Three is sort of not sure.
0:29:44 > 0:29:47Four probably should be a five but we're being polite
0:29:47 > 0:29:50and five is known as the bucket of despair.
0:29:50 > 0:29:52The Government waste thing,
0:29:52 > 0:29:55they wrote an article in 1906 about the fat boy of Peckham,
0:29:55 > 0:29:57John Trunley,
0:29:57 > 0:30:01who was built a special 200 yards of railway
0:30:01 > 0:30:05by the council because he was too unfit to walk to school.
0:30:05 > 0:30:08- That's excellent. - Possibly the first ever wastage.
0:30:08 > 0:30:11Once we've done that and scored the questions,
0:30:11 > 0:30:13you then have to look through them
0:30:13 > 0:30:16and find if there are themes in them you can pick out.
0:30:16 > 0:30:20If you can find a theme, you can start picking out questions
0:30:20 > 0:30:23and see what order you might run them in in the show
0:30:23 > 0:30:26so not only would it make a good show when it's cut
0:30:26 > 0:30:29but as we shoot in front of a live audience for two hours,
0:30:29 > 0:30:34it will actually be lively and exciting show that goes out as live.
0:30:34 > 0:30:37My favourite part of the process by far
0:30:37 > 0:30:40is where I usually sit in the Sound Gallery to watch the show.
0:30:40 > 0:30:44The audience is in, hundreds and hundreds of people
0:30:44 > 0:30:48all so excited. Some of them faint they're so excited when they arrive in the studio.
0:30:48 > 0:30:52We have the longest waiting list for tickets for QI outside Top Gear,
0:30:52 > 0:30:54so people are very excited.
0:30:54 > 0:30:58And so am I, on every show. Even though we have made over 130 now.
0:30:58 > 0:31:02- Who is your favourite panellist? - Sandi Toksvig.- She's on tonight.
0:31:02 > 0:31:08Oh, wow! Really? Seriously? Oh, wow! That is fantastic.
0:31:08 > 0:31:13When that music starts and the applause goes and Stephen says,
0:31:13 > 0:31:16"Good evening, good evening, good evening."
0:31:16 > 0:31:18I think it's brilliant, it is so exciting.
0:31:18 > 0:31:22Go-o-ood evening, good evening, good evening, good evening, good evening,
0:31:22 > 0:31:25good evening, good evening, good evening and welcome to QI.
0:31:26 > 0:31:30I get to my dressing room usually by about three o'clock,
0:31:30 > 0:31:33having stopped by at the office where the Elves and production staff are
0:31:33 > 0:31:38and picked up the cards and the script, such as it is,
0:31:38 > 0:31:40and a highlighter pen.
0:31:40 > 0:31:45Then I go down. We do a rehearsal with stand-ins for the guests.
0:31:45 > 0:31:48There are video slides in the background and audio queues
0:31:48 > 0:31:51and sometimes props, so cameras have to rehearse for that
0:31:51 > 0:31:54so that the thing will flow on the evening itself.
0:31:54 > 0:31:58- Checking your earpiece. - Yes, you're coming through loud and clear.
0:31:58 > 0:32:01There's a little man who comes in my... Who speaks in my ear.
0:32:01 > 0:32:04- LAUGHTER - Oh! Oh! Now! Oh!
0:32:04 > 0:32:07He's telling me that we are ready to go.
0:32:07 > 0:32:10It's easy to forget when you watch the show, cut, on TV at half-an-hour,
0:32:10 > 0:32:12that they've sat on the stage for two hours
0:32:12 > 0:32:14in front of a live audience.
0:32:14 > 0:32:18Let's inject some testosterone into the room, shall we?
0:32:18 > 0:32:21Actually, let's not. Let's instead introduce Alan Davies.
0:32:27 > 0:32:31It's incredibly difficult territory for even these great stand-up comedians,
0:32:31 > 0:32:36because you're not asking them to do jokes about the normal things that you might.
0:32:36 > 0:32:37It's not, "My mother-in-law".
0:32:37 > 0:32:39You're asking them to do jokes
0:32:39 > 0:32:42on bilateral gynandromorphic hermaphroditism,
0:32:42 > 0:32:44which it's not easy to think up something
0:32:44 > 0:32:47on the spur of the moment that's funny about that.
0:32:47 > 0:32:50Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
0:32:50 > 0:32:51- Chicken. - No!
0:32:51 > 0:32:54- KLAXON SOUNDS - The egg?
0:32:54 > 0:32:56The egg is the right answer, yes.
0:32:56 > 0:32:59There's that wonderful joke about the chicken and egg
0:32:59 > 0:33:03have made love and are lying there, having a post-coital cigarette.
0:33:03 > 0:33:07The chicken says to the egg, "That answers that old question."
0:33:10 > 0:33:15It's almost never the case that the question plays out on the night
0:33:15 > 0:33:18the way we planned it in the writing room.
0:33:18 > 0:33:22The only one, actually, we can remember that we've identified
0:33:22 > 0:33:25that went the way we thought it would was the fantastic question
0:33:25 > 0:33:31about why edible tortoises took so long to find a scientific name.
0:33:31 > 0:33:33Were they particularly litigious?
0:33:33 > 0:33:36"Give me a name and I will sue you."
0:33:36 > 0:33:38It wasn't that. A nice thought, again.
0:33:38 > 0:33:41They had another property, which was unfortunate for them.
0:33:41 > 0:33:44- The tortoises did? - Yeah.
0:33:44 > 0:33:48- They were edible? - They were so edible.
0:33:48 > 0:33:52Anyone who saw one couldn't stop to think of a name for it.
0:33:52 > 0:33:55They just had to eat it straight away.
0:33:55 > 0:33:58It's one of those... I don't know what they are called.
0:33:58 > 0:34:01Just get one, they are really bloody good.
0:34:01 > 0:34:05There's no, there's no Latin name for the pistachio nut, either.
0:34:05 > 0:34:07Exactly the same way. No-one could be bothered.
0:34:07 > 0:34:10"Shut up with your Latin. Eat them, they're brilliant!"
0:34:10 > 0:34:11I'm afraid that's what happened.
0:34:11 > 0:34:15- There's no Latin name for Maltesers. - LAUGHTER
0:34:19 > 0:34:23It's kind of true. None of them made it to London.
0:34:23 > 0:34:25None of them made it to Europe.
0:34:25 > 0:34:27"Now, this time, this time,
0:34:27 > 0:34:30"we're going to take it and we are going to study it."
0:34:30 > 0:34:33Leave it. No. We are taking it back.
0:34:33 > 0:34:38When the ferry gets to Dover, there's a bloke going like this,
0:34:38 > 0:34:42leaving the door where the tortoise is kept.
0:34:48 > 0:34:50When the show's going out, obviously,
0:34:50 > 0:34:52there's not a great deal you can do.
0:34:52 > 0:34:55We sit in a...there's a little box behind the gallery
0:34:55 > 0:34:58where Flash the producer is and the director.
0:34:58 > 0:35:00If anything comes up during the show
0:35:00 > 0:35:03where one of the panellists queries one of our facts
0:35:03 > 0:35:06or comes up with an assertion of their own
0:35:06 > 0:35:09that we're not sure is right or wrong...
0:35:09 > 0:35:13..Then we will, you know, immediately run to check it out,
0:35:13 > 0:35:17erm, before they stop talking about it, basically. That's the dream.
0:35:17 > 0:35:22I know something about statues of military personnel.
0:35:22 > 0:35:24- Yes? - On horseback.
0:35:24 > 0:35:29If they're up on their hind legs, that means they died in battle,
0:35:29 > 0:35:31if they've got one leg up,
0:35:31 > 0:35:34that means they died on service but not in a battle.
0:35:34 > 0:35:39If they've got all four down, it means they died after, years later.
0:35:39 > 0:35:41Is that really true?
0:35:41 > 0:35:43If that's true, I shall have the little QI Elves...
0:35:43 > 0:35:46They're flashing me now. "This is an urban myth and not true."
0:35:46 > 0:35:48LAUGHTER
0:35:48 > 0:35:51They're very quick. APPLAUSE
0:35:52 > 0:35:56The best players of the game are the ones who basically
0:35:56 > 0:35:58don't take any notice of the question
0:35:58 > 0:36:00and say what the hell they want to.
0:36:00 > 0:36:03The socks that man in the middle is wearing are very long,
0:36:03 > 0:36:06and just out of interest for you,
0:36:06 > 0:36:09that's something I've turned to recently.
0:36:09 > 0:36:12- I now favour the longer sock. - Do you?
0:36:12 > 0:36:14Can you take me through your reasoning?
0:36:14 > 0:36:16I can. I'll show you. The gentleman's sock.
0:36:16 > 0:36:19The half-hose. It is called the half-hose.
0:36:19 > 0:36:25Now, Jo. You, as a lady, are going to think this sock stops a lot sooner than it does.
0:36:25 > 0:36:26So watch, watch this.
0:36:26 > 0:36:29Look at that. Surely, surely we've reached the peak.
0:36:29 > 0:36:31- Oh, my goodness me. - Surely we've peaked.
0:36:31 > 0:36:33- Oh, my word!- Surely! Surely!
0:36:33 > 0:36:36He's wearing tights! Ah!
0:36:36 > 0:36:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:36:40 > 0:36:44Can I say, not so much to Jo but to Stephen, Alan and Sean,
0:36:44 > 0:36:48I urge you to give it a go.
0:36:48 > 0:36:51Because it gives you a feeling of security.
0:36:51 > 0:36:55They do make you look like a knob head.
0:36:58 > 0:37:01Many times it has got completely out of control and, you know,
0:37:01 > 0:37:04it is uncomfortable for me at the time but the truth is,
0:37:04 > 0:37:07it has resulted in some great television
0:37:07 > 0:37:09and you've got to think of the scene
0:37:09 > 0:37:12where they're talking about the Parthenon.
0:37:12 > 0:37:17Where everybody started to sing, led by Bill Bailey and Jimmy Carr.
0:37:17 > 0:37:19That, you can't really script that.
0:37:19 > 0:37:23They say, of the Ac-, Ac-, Acropolis, where the Parthenon is...
0:37:23 > 0:37:25STEPHEN BABBLES
0:37:25 > 0:37:29They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is...
0:37:29 > 0:37:32They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is... Th-, the-ey...
0:37:32 > 0:37:35LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:37:37 > 0:37:40So he kept stumbling on it. He never fluffs. He hates fluffing, Stephen.
0:37:40 > 0:37:43# They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is
0:37:43 > 0:37:46# They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is
0:37:46 > 0:37:50# They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is
0:37:50 > 0:37:52# They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is. #
0:37:52 > 0:37:54And, of course, I became fully aware of it
0:37:54 > 0:37:57and the more aware of it I became, the more impossible it became.
0:37:57 > 0:38:01Can I write it down? Read it.
0:38:01 > 0:38:05- It says it there. - LAUGHTER
0:38:05 > 0:38:06You've got to tell us now!
0:38:06 > 0:38:10They say of the Acropolis, where the Parthenon is...
0:38:11 > 0:38:14..that there are no straight lines.
0:38:14 > 0:38:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:38:19 > 0:38:24I've been broadcasting for very nearly 35 years now
0:38:24 > 0:38:28and I can say that QI is the most fun show,
0:38:28 > 0:38:31the nicest show that I've ever had to produce.
0:38:31 > 0:38:34My favourite part is definitely the edit.
0:38:34 > 0:38:37Because the thing is, we take all the components and make something of it.
0:38:37 > 0:38:40It's in there somewhere and it's a question of finding it,
0:38:40 > 0:38:45like a sculptor with a big bit of rock and somewhere inside is a statue of David.
0:38:45 > 0:38:50The shows are usually slightly different from what comes through the door from the studio.
0:38:50 > 0:38:53Getting it down to 44 is slightly painful.
0:38:53 > 0:38:5944 down to 29 is very painful because you've cut a show that you like.
0:38:59 > 0:39:02You've cut a show that's got bits you're most interested in,
0:39:02 > 0:39:04bits that make you laugh the most.
0:39:04 > 0:39:09The balance of questions is there before it comes to the edit.
0:39:09 > 0:39:12What we're actually doing is enhancing what was there.
0:39:12 > 0:39:17If there's a pause in recording where they have to think before they answer,
0:39:17 > 0:39:21they um and ah, and part of what we do in the edit is to make it look slick.
0:39:21 > 0:39:23Have a look at this.
0:39:23 > 0:39:26What? What? What? Hmmm. Mmmye-e-e.
0:39:26 > 0:39:29A-hey! Guss-ah getcha-ka pow!
0:39:29 > 0:39:30Arr-arr-rum. Um.
0:39:30 > 0:39:32STEPHEN PURRS
0:39:32 > 0:39:35INTAKE OF BREATH
0:39:35 > 0:39:36Um. Um. Ne-ne-ne-ne-ne.
0:39:36 > 0:39:39Eh, moving on.
0:39:39 > 0:39:43I think the QI core audience isn't a core audience.
0:39:43 > 0:39:46That's its great success, is that it is genuine,
0:39:46 > 0:39:50across the board, anyone who is interested in stuff.
0:39:50 > 0:39:56I think that since QI started, it has broadened its audience
0:39:56 > 0:40:01and a lot of people that I wouldn't presume would watch QI love it,
0:40:01 > 0:40:05watch it, enjoy it and have assimilated lots of facts
0:40:05 > 0:40:09and knowledge but have had a really good laugh at the same time.
0:40:09 > 0:40:14It's old-fashioned kind of BBC entertainment for everybody.
0:40:14 > 0:40:18We get lots of teenagers watching
0:40:18 > 0:40:21and I think school children, in particular, like the show
0:40:21 > 0:40:24because it's a very, very badly-behaved classroom.
0:40:24 > 0:40:27The main thing I like about QI is the witty humour.
0:40:29 > 0:40:32Like, whenever I watch it, I learn something new.
0:40:32 > 0:40:35I like the fact that they have loads of facts.
0:40:35 > 0:40:38Because mainly, it's about the facts for me.
0:40:39 > 0:40:43For resuscitation, they used to blow smoke up your bum.
0:40:46 > 0:40:50I think there's something about QI which is more fun than school,
0:40:50 > 0:40:52or it is school as it should be.
0:40:52 > 0:40:58To make school more like QI, the teachers could use interesting facts
0:40:58 > 0:41:01which will make you laugh and remember things
0:41:01 > 0:41:06and just things that are more than textbooks, reading, writing.
0:41:06 > 0:41:09Interactive stuff, just like this place here,
0:41:09 > 0:41:12where you learn things at the same time as having fun.
0:41:12 > 0:41:14And we muck about in class.
0:41:14 > 0:41:18If we're given work to do, an exercise to do,
0:41:18 > 0:41:19we do them wrongly on purpose
0:41:19 > 0:41:21and occasionally break the equipment.
0:41:21 > 0:41:24I want to saw something, now.
0:41:24 > 0:41:26I just, I just want to say...
0:41:26 > 0:41:27LAUGHTER
0:41:29 > 0:41:32These have been lent to us by the garden museum.
0:41:32 > 0:41:34- It works! It works! - It really does!
0:41:34 > 0:41:37- Oh, my God! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:41:39 > 0:41:41Hope it doesn't break.
0:41:41 > 0:41:43I tell you what...
0:41:47 > 0:41:51I really wish they hadn't made this set out of asbestos now.
0:41:52 > 0:41:55We've had some great props. Some of them, I'm not allowed to touch.
0:41:55 > 0:41:58I remember we had a rifle that you could shoot around corners
0:41:58 > 0:42:01and I went to grab it and Stephen nearly kicked me.
0:42:01 > 0:42:04Don't touch it. They did ask that nobody else touch it.
0:42:04 > 0:42:06It's very valuable, I'm afraid.
0:42:06 > 0:42:08I was going to make it go over the desk.
0:42:08 > 0:42:10I'm sorry.
0:42:10 > 0:42:11I can't believe I'm not allowed to play with that.
0:42:11 > 0:42:14I'm afraid I was given specific, "Alan not to touch", instructions.
0:42:15 > 0:42:17It's very valuable.
0:42:17 > 0:42:21I love the fact that somewhere, there's a memo that just says,
0:42:21 > 0:42:25"Machine gun, for Stephen Fry's use only."
0:42:25 > 0:42:27But some of them, I am allowed to touch
0:42:27 > 0:42:29and then we can have great fun.
0:42:29 > 0:42:33I've always enjoyed... After a while, they gave me a desk
0:42:33 > 0:42:35and I would find things in there.
0:42:35 > 0:42:37Alan, I believe you've got something inside your desk.
0:42:37 > 0:42:40- Have I? - Yes, have you not looked?
0:42:40 > 0:42:46- There. So, what is that? - It's a loofah.
0:42:46 > 0:42:48- And where do loofahs come from? - The bathroom.
0:42:50 > 0:42:54It's getting a bit harder to find especially general ignorance questions,
0:42:54 > 0:42:57because there are only so many common misconceptions
0:42:57 > 0:42:59that people have or there are only so many things
0:42:59 > 0:43:02that people know that then turn out to be wrong.
0:43:02 > 0:43:05Is the thing in James Bond about sumo wrestlers
0:43:05 > 0:43:08being able to retract them? That's true, I think.
0:43:08 > 0:43:10It's true that it's not true, we read it.
0:43:10 > 0:43:12The other one, in fact, nobody liked this
0:43:12 > 0:43:14but it's in one of them, I think Goldfinger,
0:43:14 > 0:43:16is they shoot a bullet inside an aeroplane
0:43:16 > 0:43:19and Goldfinger gets sucked out through the...
0:43:19 > 0:43:21That's untrue as well.
0:43:21 > 0:43:25As regards to the rest of the show, there doesn't seem to be much sign we're running out.
0:43:25 > 0:43:29If anything, there's an alarming amount more to know
0:43:29 > 0:43:31than there was when we started the show.
0:43:31 > 0:43:34The idea of doing each series about a different letter of the alphabet
0:43:34 > 0:43:38started in a very strange way, which is we had made the pilot
0:43:38 > 0:43:40and saw a publisher about doing a book from it.
0:43:40 > 0:43:43The Book Of A.
0:43:43 > 0:43:47Although we've since done 10 QI books which have been translated into 32 languages,
0:43:47 > 0:43:50they didn't want an encyclopaedia of things beginning with A,
0:43:50 > 0:43:53they wanted something more random, like the pilot.
0:43:53 > 0:43:57So I said, what if the television series was all about A
0:43:57 > 0:44:00and then we could do a Book of A and a Book of B.
0:44:00 > 0:44:03They said, "That is a good idea. We would definitely do that."
0:44:03 > 0:44:05So I went back to the office and said,
0:44:05 > 0:44:09we're going to do 12 programmes all about the letter A.
0:44:09 > 0:44:11We laughed the whole afternoon.
0:44:11 > 0:44:14We thought this was impossible, it couldn't be done.
0:44:14 > 0:44:17The publisher never bought the idea after all.
0:44:17 > 0:44:21It's a very cunning system to base a programme on a letter of the alphabet.
0:44:21 > 0:44:26It does, you know, suggest there will be an end after 26 series
0:44:26 > 0:44:30but 26 series is pretty good for most programmes,
0:44:30 > 0:44:32so what a very, very clever idea.
0:44:32 > 0:44:36The plan to start each series with a letter of the alphabet
0:44:36 > 0:44:38was planted quite early on,
0:44:38 > 0:44:43but that means that I will be 62 when it finishes!
0:44:43 > 0:44:49It was an extraordinary act of hubris on John Lloyd's part
0:44:49 > 0:44:52that the very first series should be around things beginning with A
0:44:52 > 0:44:56because it suggested he had the confidence it would last through the alphabet.
0:44:56 > 0:44:59I hope that even if I'm in my wheelchair
0:44:59 > 0:45:01by the time it gets to Z,
0:45:01 > 0:45:04that somebody will still be carrying the flag for it.
0:45:04 > 0:45:08QI at its best is what television is about.
0:45:08 > 0:45:11When I watch the show, if I'm not on it, I'll watch it,
0:45:11 > 0:45:15and you find it is just time spent in good company.
0:45:15 > 0:45:19- They really are like little people's arms. - LAUGHTER
0:45:19 > 0:45:23- They are. - That is a person. That's the Pope. - LAUGHTER
0:45:23 > 0:45:27- Oh, I see. The one on the right? - You're right. His front paws...
0:45:27 > 0:45:31- They are like little hands. - That's what the Pope is thinking.
0:45:31 > 0:45:34He's going, "He's got little hands".
0:45:34 > 0:45:38"Are you ready to order?", and he is going, "Shall I have beaver?"
0:45:39 > 0:45:43I find when I come on this show that Stephen starts talking about
0:45:43 > 0:45:45something and you think,
0:45:45 > 0:45:49I know an awful lot about this, which I didn't think I did.
0:45:49 > 0:45:54That's one of the fascinating things about a head, is what lives in it.
0:45:54 > 0:45:57I've often wondered, why could you not,
0:45:57 > 0:46:00if it's only 62 miles to what people call space,
0:46:00 > 0:46:02why can't you just build a ladder?
0:46:02 > 0:46:06It can't be beyond the wit of man to build a ladder
0:46:06 > 0:46:09- and you could walk up it and save a lot of bother.- Yes.
0:46:09 > 0:46:15- An oxygen pack necessary, but, yes. - Maybe a lift?- A lift would be good.
0:46:15 > 0:46:18Once you get up there, there is nothing really there.
0:46:18 > 0:46:20It's a bit like Norfolk. LAUGHTER
0:46:20 > 0:46:23Now...you just be careful!
0:46:24 > 0:46:28We, generally, as people, as humans,
0:46:28 > 0:46:33retain far more information than we're aware of on a daily basis.
0:46:33 > 0:46:41What this programme does is actually, by a series of randomly opening doors and switching on and off of synapses,
0:46:41 > 0:46:46unlocks all this information that, hitherto, you probably didn't even know you knew.
0:46:46 > 0:46:49You're learning while you're watching it.
0:46:49 > 0:46:53It's another one of them creative shows where unwittingly...
0:46:53 > 0:46:59My dad will wake up in his sleep screaming Pythagoras' theorem thanks to you.
0:46:59 > 0:47:02And now my mother is sleeping in a separate room.
0:47:02 > 0:47:04I have odd facts lodged in my head
0:47:04 > 0:47:07as a result of doing the Unbelievable Truth and QI.
0:47:07 > 0:47:12I can't always remember...like a badly put together Wikipedia page,
0:47:12 > 0:47:16I haven't really got enough citations for the information in my head.
0:47:16 > 0:47:23All the stuff I've been taught... well, not taught, I've listened to, I've talked about, I can't remember.
0:47:23 > 0:47:26I mean, Alan, there's a couple of things about moons he knows.
0:47:26 > 0:47:29How many moons does the Earth have?
0:47:29 > 0:47:32- CHICKEN BUZZER - Yes?
0:47:32 > 0:47:35The Earth has one moon which is made of cheese.
0:47:35 > 0:47:37KLAXON
0:47:39 > 0:47:41LAUGHTER
0:47:41 > 0:47:43APPLAUSE
0:47:44 > 0:47:48- I'm afraid you lose ten. - But it does have one moon.- No.
0:47:48 > 0:47:52- It's called THE moon. - LAUGHTER
0:47:52 > 0:47:54One of them.
0:47:54 > 0:47:57- I rest my case! - APPLAUSE
0:47:57 > 0:48:00I haven't learned anything. I don't remember any of it.
0:48:00 > 0:48:02It's amazing stuff.
0:48:02 > 0:48:06It's instantly forgettable because it's beyond trivia.
0:48:06 > 0:48:12If you're going on Have I Got News For You, you can make sure you've read the papers
0:48:12 > 0:48:15because all sorts of small stories will come up,
0:48:15 > 0:48:21but if you have read at least eight pages into the Telegraph every day, that will help you.
0:48:21 > 0:48:26But on QI, you have to wish you had been listening more your whole life.
0:48:26 > 0:48:29I'm 40, so I've done 40 years of preparation.
0:48:29 > 0:48:32That's how you have got to look at this show.
0:48:32 > 0:48:37You've done as much preparation as you have life, because anything might come up.
0:48:37 > 0:48:42It's cricket to the full contact football that is Mock The Week.
0:48:42 > 0:48:46It's very relaxed, sitting in the sun and it's a meandering conversation.
0:48:46 > 0:48:48It's a warm, supportive atmosphere
0:48:48 > 0:48:52and there's not a sense there's a right or wrong answer
0:48:52 > 0:48:54or people looking to interject and crush.
0:48:54 > 0:48:59It's just a beautiful petri dish on which fabulous comedic mould can grow.
0:48:59 > 0:49:02The best panellists are self-starting.
0:49:02 > 0:49:07The ones who are not worried about what the questions are, who they're sitting next to,
0:49:07 > 0:49:10whether Stephen's being rude to them or not, which he sometimes is.
0:49:10 > 0:49:14I didn't know how much I didn't know until I came on this show.
0:49:14 > 0:49:16I'm afraid to catch a bus now.
0:49:16 > 0:49:20Mock the Week, I love doing, because that's my group.
0:49:20 > 0:49:22We all grew up together.
0:49:22 > 0:49:25This feels like walking into the staffroom,
0:49:25 > 0:49:28so it's a little bit intimidating. You're a bit too keen to impress.
0:49:28 > 0:49:31If he thinks something's stupid, he will say so.
0:49:31 > 0:49:37- If it was '55, it was Elvis Presley. - Erm, wider.- Rock 'n' roll!
0:49:37 > 0:49:42- Rock 'n' roll is the right answer. - Don't look so stupid now, do I? - LAUGHTER
0:49:42 > 0:49:47Not quite so stupid, Rob, no, but all things are relative.
0:49:47 > 0:49:49LAUGHTER
0:49:49 > 0:49:54It's the intellectual equivalent of not having the right change...ever.
0:49:54 > 0:50:00The first time I came on, nobody knew who I was and I felt like, I'm being competent.
0:50:00 > 0:50:04But I definitely had that feeling that when I'd been quiet for a while,
0:50:04 > 0:50:06everyone would be worrying for me because they thought,
0:50:06 > 0:50:10this is some makeweight they've got on because somebody good cancelled.
0:50:10 > 0:50:16If all the panellists were like David Mitchell, it would be like all four soap boxes.
0:50:16 > 0:50:19As Stephen calls it, "Your angry logic, David".
0:50:19 > 0:50:25Samuel Pepys famously buried his Parmesan cheese to protect it from the Great Fire
0:50:25 > 0:50:28but why does cheese taste better when it's grated?
0:50:28 > 0:50:33Sometimes it does, but if you get one of those catering bags of grated cheese,
0:50:33 > 0:50:36if you should be working for a catering company
0:50:36 > 0:50:39and happened to steal one, for example.
0:50:39 > 0:50:43What sort of twit would do that? LAUGHTER
0:50:43 > 0:50:49You buy cheese at the supermarket and it says, "Consume within two days of opening".
0:50:49 > 0:50:53A vast amount...how much cheese do you think I'm going to get through?
0:50:53 > 0:50:56Why? It's fine. We know it's fine!
0:50:56 > 0:50:59Plus it has a label on it saying, "20 years aged".
0:50:59 > 0:51:01Exactly!
0:51:01 > 0:51:05And two days before it's completely inedible, you sell it to me!
0:51:05 > 0:51:07LAUGHTER
0:51:07 > 0:51:10My particular delight as a new guest was Dan Radcliffe,
0:51:10 > 0:51:16who I resisted for years, thinking, "Harry Potter guy? No", and he was fantastic on the show.
0:51:16 > 0:51:20- The wizardly Daniel Radcliffe. - APPLAUSE
0:51:20 > 0:51:22He took to it like a duck to water.
0:51:22 > 0:51:26He knew lots of stuff, he was so nice, he was such a lark.
0:51:26 > 0:51:31- What's the oldest trick in the book? - Is it an ancient Greek book?
0:51:31 > 0:51:34- Even older.- Egyptian? - Egyptian is the right answer.
0:51:34 > 0:51:37- I think I might... - You might know this?
0:51:37 > 0:51:41- Is it a man called Dedi? - How do you know about Dedi?
0:51:41 > 0:51:44He was a man who did the first magic trick
0:51:44 > 0:51:49- which was, I think, a decapitation of a goose.- You're right.
0:51:49 > 0:51:52And tore it off and did it to impress the king.
0:51:52 > 0:51:55- And it's in an ancient scroll. - It is!
0:51:55 > 0:51:57Which I do know the name of... I think.
0:51:57 > 0:52:02- Go on.- The Westcar Papyrus? - The Westcar Papyrus. This man is brilliant.
0:52:02 > 0:52:04APPLAUSE
0:52:04 > 0:52:11QI guests are unusual people - they have a strange mix of being imaginative and very nice
0:52:11 > 0:52:15so I think you see a difference between many other panel games.
0:52:15 > 0:52:20It's a pleasant experience to watch, QI, and it's a pleasant experience to be on.
0:52:21 > 0:52:25And I'm very pleasant as well. I'm extremely pleasant.
0:52:25 > 0:52:31Did you know a veal has to have more space to be transported to the abattoir
0:52:31 > 0:52:34than a human being in the back of an aeroplane?
0:52:34 > 0:52:37- To be fair, we have a holiday, they get killed. - LAUGHTER
0:52:37 > 0:52:41You could be coming back. Have we got a vegetablist?
0:52:43 > 0:52:48- I'm a veggie.- You're a vegetablist? - I wouldn't eat a veal, I would free it.
0:52:48 > 0:52:50I had a puffin last week.
0:52:50 > 0:52:56That's not delicious but the point of eating it was because I'd never had one before.
0:52:56 > 0:53:00- I had the same with guinea pig. - Have you tried one of my turds? - LAUGHTER
0:53:02 > 0:53:05Did you just say what I thought you said?
0:53:05 > 0:53:08Get out. Out now.
0:53:08 > 0:53:12The signature aspect of QI is the forfeit.
0:53:12 > 0:53:17There are things you think you know and I ask a question
0:53:17 > 0:53:20and everybody thinks they know the answer and they'll not want to say it.
0:53:20 > 0:53:25- What do you suffer from if you're afraid of heights?- Vertigo.
0:53:25 > 0:53:28KLAXON
0:53:28 > 0:53:30How many senses do you have?
0:53:30 > 0:53:33MUSICAL BUZZER
0:53:33 > 0:53:36I sense a buzzer coming.
0:53:36 > 0:53:38- Five. - KLAXON
0:53:38 > 0:53:42Six, seven, eight, nine, four, three, two, one.
0:53:42 > 0:53:44How old are you?
0:53:44 > 0:53:47It shows the effect of this game, though.
0:53:47 > 0:53:52Ask a question all four of us think, that is something I definitely know,
0:53:52 > 0:53:57but I've been made so uncertain, I'm not even willing to give my own age, name or address.
0:53:57 > 0:54:02How can this possibly be a trap? I am 37. 37.
0:54:02 > 0:54:06- There we go, no points lost. - KLAXON
0:54:06 > 0:54:12- LAUGHTER - But that's not wrong!
0:54:12 > 0:54:17I realised around series four that I was the fall guy. The penny dropped.
0:54:17 > 0:54:22I decided I was not going to press the button any more and say the stupid things.
0:54:22 > 0:54:24I was a bit foldy-army about it
0:54:24 > 0:54:29and John Lloyd took me to one side and he told me that it was a sign of great intelligence
0:54:29 > 0:54:31to get things wrong and come last.
0:54:31 > 0:54:37Finally proving that it's all academic and a dream, with -27, Alan Davies.
0:54:37 > 0:54:41The scoring system, we get asked about this a fair bit,
0:54:41 > 0:54:46and it's a proprietary algorithm and I can't talk to you about it.
0:54:46 > 0:54:49I'm not responsible for the scoring system on QI.
0:54:49 > 0:54:54That is entirely the responsibility of Colin, who is a very close friend
0:54:54 > 0:54:57and I trust implicitly that his mathematics,
0:54:57 > 0:55:01though it does occasionally look wrong, is right.
0:55:01 > 0:55:05The questions that we've got wrong which are really obvious
0:55:05 > 0:55:09and usually admit our mistakes.
0:55:09 > 0:55:12We even go back and, in future shows,
0:55:12 > 0:55:15we might give people their points back.
0:55:15 > 0:55:16Or take them off them.
0:55:16 > 0:55:23I answered a question about an obscure scientific fact called the triple point of water,
0:55:23 > 0:55:27which is the temperature at which water can exist in all three states.
0:55:27 > 0:55:32I said zero was the temperature and I got extra points for this.
0:55:32 > 0:55:34Zero is the triple point of water.
0:55:34 > 0:55:37It's the first temperature at which water can exist in all three states
0:55:37 > 0:55:40because you can have water vapour which is at zero as well.
0:55:40 > 0:55:44Very good. You must have some points for that and this round of applause.
0:55:44 > 0:55:47APPLAUSE
0:55:47 > 0:55:51A year later I come back and I'm told they have received a e-mail
0:55:51 > 0:55:55which points out that the actual temperature is 0.01,
0:55:55 > 0:55:58so I was one hundredth of a degree off.
0:55:58 > 0:56:02Points were docked from a show I did a year later.
0:56:02 > 0:56:03It's zero.
0:56:03 > 0:56:05KLAXON
0:56:05 > 0:56:08You see, we never forget.
0:56:08 > 0:56:12That's what you said last time and we gave you points for it.
0:56:12 > 0:56:17We're now going to take those points away from a previous series.
0:56:17 > 0:56:22That's the forfeit, because some of our eagle-eyed viewers wrote in to point out
0:56:22 > 0:56:27that the triple point of water is actually 0.01 degrees centigrade.
0:56:27 > 0:56:31- That's 12 points off. - But I was rounding off.
0:56:31 > 0:56:39That is arcane and nerdy and picky and pedantic in a delightful way.
0:56:39 > 0:56:44I felt aggrieved at the time but I knew it was the right thing to do.
0:56:44 > 0:56:46I had to take my punishment.
0:56:46 > 0:56:49Occasionally, QI is re-run,
0:56:49 > 0:56:51now and then,
0:56:51 > 0:56:54once in a couple of blue moons.
0:56:54 > 0:57:00My kids watch QI endlessly on repeat, so they're quite big fans of it.
0:57:00 > 0:57:04It's one of the few things I've done that they actually like,
0:57:04 > 0:57:07which is not a good thing, but I'm letting you know that.
0:57:07 > 0:57:11It's a very rare evening that I don't see that QI's on somewhere.
0:57:11 > 0:57:14It's on permanently.
0:57:14 > 0:57:17It's only interrupted by a stupid motoring show
0:57:17 > 0:57:21but other than that, I can say I will watch QI and you always can.
0:57:21 > 0:57:24You can watch the same one three or four times
0:57:24 > 0:57:28and there's always something fresh that you missed the first and second time.
0:57:28 > 0:57:32The show is successful because it differentiates itself
0:57:32 > 0:57:37from other comedy panel shows because it's not just about comedy. You're learning things.
0:57:37 > 0:57:42QI is, no-one expects you to know the answers, whether you know or not, it's irrelevant,
0:57:42 > 0:57:46but you enjoy each other's company and you have a nice conversation.
0:57:46 > 0:57:48It's like a parlour game without rules. Lovely.
0:57:48 > 0:57:51It's very much like being at a dinner party.
0:57:51 > 0:57:54Being invited to a dinner party at Stephen Fry's house.
0:57:54 > 0:57:57Who are the other guests going to be? This is exciting.
0:57:57 > 0:58:03For the people at school, education-wise, who fell through the cracks, this is our X Factor.
0:58:03 > 0:58:10Everyone, from the runners to the lighting director, all really like making the show.
0:58:10 > 0:58:14It's fantastic fun to do and it feels worthwhile.
0:58:14 > 0:58:19QI isn't really about making successful television,
0:58:19 > 0:58:23it's about something far more important - having interesting lives.
0:58:23 > 0:58:26We have to be careful that we don't get smug,
0:58:26 > 0:58:31don't relax too much and think, we know how to do this. You've got to keep moving.
0:58:31 > 0:58:35This is a show that could go on for a century or more.
0:58:36 > 0:58:41There's no end to the quite interesting things there are in the world.
0:58:41 > 0:58:43Good night.
0:59:01 > 0:59:04Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:59:04 > 0:59:06E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk