0:00:07 > 0:00:10Well, here's something you've never seen before -
0:00:10 > 0:00:13a dead as a doornail Top Of The Pops studio.
0:00:13 > 0:00:18Usually raving like mentality itself, but today, it's sort of dead
0:00:18 > 0:00:21because they've just finished.
0:00:21 > 0:00:26Here I am to tell you about, well, where people do things
0:00:26 > 0:00:29and what things are. This is where Pan's People dance,
0:00:29 > 0:00:32you see, a nice, big, clear area.
0:00:32 > 0:00:36Now, over here, we have where all the sound comes out of
0:00:36 > 0:00:41so that everyone knows when to dance and all that.
0:00:41 > 0:00:44That's the sound machine there, you see.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47See, looks like a very old television set.
0:00:47 > 0:00:51Over here, we have psychedelic lights what flash on and off
0:00:51 > 0:00:54and give the impression of psychedelia.
0:00:54 > 0:01:01Over here, we have, if I can get to it, area A, B, C.
0:01:01 > 0:01:04When we're doing it, you see, somebody shouts "C!"
0:01:04 > 0:01:10We all rush like mad over to here and say, "That was fab, wasn't it?"
0:01:10 > 0:01:13and into the next song.
0:01:13 > 0:01:17More flashing psychedelia. There's a Camera Two.
0:01:17 > 0:01:21Now, what else do we do? That's about it, really.
0:01:21 > 0:01:25As I say, it's usually raving but it's unraving today
0:01:25 > 0:01:28because we've just done it and we're all terribly exhausted,
0:01:28 > 0:01:30aren't we, Two?
0:01:32 > 0:01:34I think he's passed away. Never mind.
0:01:36 > 0:01:40Right, now then, by the miracle of television,
0:01:40 > 0:01:42we are going over now to an interview with me
0:01:42 > 0:01:45so let's miracleise.
0:01:45 > 0:01:49Do you think that Top Of The Pops people overdo the special effects
0:01:49 > 0:01:51and don't concentrate on the groups enough?
0:01:51 > 0:01:55Whichever answer won't get me fired,
0:01:55 > 0:01:57or, no, not at all.
0:01:57 > 0:02:01A little psychedelia never hurt anybody.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03I think it's wonderful in small doses
0:02:03 > 0:02:07and that's what they give us it in, so that's all right. All right?
0:02:07 > 0:02:10You don't think that groups mime too much,
0:02:10 > 0:02:11that you can see that they're miming
0:02:11 > 0:02:14and that makes you know that they're not doing it properly?
0:02:14 > 0:02:17What can she ge talking angout?
0:02:17 > 0:02:21No, Engelbert Humperdinck sang live on today's show
0:02:21 > 0:02:23so that disproves that.
0:02:23 > 0:02:27How does it feel to be interviewing one of Britain's top DJs
0:02:27 > 0:02:28here in the Top Of The Pops studio?
0:02:28 > 0:02:30- I'll tell you when we know.- Oh.
0:02:30 > 0:02:32Mind of her own, she's got.
0:02:32 > 0:02:35What type of music do you personally like?
0:02:35 > 0:02:39The last movement of Mendelssohn's violin concerto. No, seriously!
0:02:39 > 0:02:42Up in my hut on a hill, we have a lot of chance to listen
0:02:42 > 0:02:45to some really fine upstanding, God-fearing music
0:02:45 > 0:02:51like Mendelssohn and the Simon Park Orchestra, but mostly everything.
0:02:51 > 0:02:54I like a lot of things. I like Simon and Garfunkel
0:02:54 > 0:02:58and Stevie Wonder and Mendelssohn and Tchaikovsky,
0:02:58 > 0:03:02except he's a bit common, Tchaikovsky, don't you think?
0:03:02 > 0:03:03Hmm.
0:03:03 > 0:03:06What you get your ideas from for your zany effects?
0:03:06 > 0:03:09Tony Blackburn.
0:03:09 > 0:03:11Copy them all down every day
0:03:11 > 0:03:15in between his schmaltz with your granny spot.
0:03:15 > 0:03:19All that stuff. Mostly out of my brain, what there is left of it.
0:03:19 > 0:03:24How long does it take to do Top Of The Pops?
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Half an hour, usually.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28Except if you make a mistake.
0:03:28 > 0:03:32Sometimes we make a mistake, like last week I forgot to say,
0:03:32 > 0:03:35"And here is David Bowie," and then I said it after the next record
0:03:35 > 0:03:38when it was somebody else, so they had to stop the whole show.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40God, it was drastic, dreadful.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43They had to pay everyone twice. That's why I'm wearing rags.
0:03:43 > 0:03:48They can't afford to pay me. Look at this, look at that. Mean.
0:03:48 > 0:03:51Tony Blackburn gets all the suits out of props, you know.
0:03:51 > 0:03:53He doesn't pay for them, not a penny.
0:03:55 > 0:03:59Do you think people really want to listen to you going on every...
0:03:59 > 0:04:03- Of course they do, darling! - Really?
0:04:03 > 0:04:06How many people do listen to your show?
0:04:06 > 0:04:12Well, my mother, Mrs Elizabeth Cole of 7 Primrose Close likes me,
0:04:12 > 0:04:14and...I don't know.
0:04:14 > 0:04:17They took a measurement a few weeks ago.
0:04:17 > 0:04:19I think it was 16 degrees Fahrenheit
0:04:19 > 0:04:22but we have a jolly time on the wireless.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25You're leaving now, aren't you?
0:04:25 > 0:04:29Oh! Yes, I'm going stereophonic, you see,
0:04:29 > 0:04:33so that I'll be coming in one ear and out the other, as usual.
0:04:35 > 0:04:37Is your show going to be very different then?
0:04:37 > 0:04:42You'll be able to see it coming out of your radio like a green mist.
0:04:42 > 0:04:45What do you think of commercial radio yourself?
0:04:45 > 0:04:48I think it's wonderful. Buy it today!
0:04:48 > 0:04:50It affects the mind, you know.
0:04:50 > 0:04:53It does, in one ear and out the other.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55I think it will be a good influence.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58I think Radio 1 needs a boot up the beeb.
0:04:58 > 0:05:00Oh, sorry about that.
0:05:00 > 0:05:03I mean, waltz with your mother, really.
0:05:03 > 0:05:07- What do you really think of Top Of The Pops?- "Really"?
0:05:07 > 0:05:10Really deep down, really?
0:05:10 > 0:05:13Well, has anybody ever been fired twice from the BBC?
0:05:15 > 0:05:19It's, you know, it's Top Of The Pops, what can you say?
0:05:19 > 0:05:21It's loud!
0:05:21 > 0:05:22Nice...
0:05:22 > 0:05:25And you have to meet the groups as well.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27You have to fight your way through tons of hair.
0:05:27 > 0:05:30"Hello," they say, "I'm so and so." "Who are you?" I say.
0:05:30 > 0:05:34They say, "I'm number one." I say, "Oh, sorry, dear.
0:05:34 > 0:05:37"Don't hear about you up on my hut on the hill."
0:05:37 > 0:05:39"Never heard of you," I say.
0:05:39 > 0:05:43Then next week they're out of the charts and I'm still here.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45I was last week.
0:05:45 > 0:05:52Do you think Radio 1 will have to compete with the new radio station?
0:05:52 > 0:05:57No, no, no. BBC compete? No, no, no.
0:05:57 > 0:05:58When the ratings go down,
0:05:58 > 0:06:01slap on Jeanette MacDonald and Nelson Eddy singing Springtime.
0:06:01 > 0:06:03That'll get them going.
0:06:03 > 0:06:07Radio 1, it will be going for ever, unless they close it down.
0:06:07 > 0:06:10- Do you think they will? - What, close it down?- Yeah.
0:06:10 > 0:06:12Don't know. I don't know.
0:06:12 > 0:06:16If Tony Blackburn keeps on going about waltzing with your mother,
0:06:16 > 0:06:19I'll go and kill him myself. Steal his teeth while I'm at it.
0:06:19 > 0:06:24And the next question, right in here, please-ah!
0:06:24 > 0:06:27Here we have, ladies and gentlemen, a wonderful questioner - on the left
0:06:27 > 0:06:30or is it right, depending on which way you're looking?
0:06:30 > 0:06:34She'll ask me a really wonderful question, really deep down from the bottom of her throat.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37- What effects can you get out of Top Of The Pops?- Ding!
0:06:37 > 0:06:39We can sort of turn things peculiar.
0:06:39 > 0:06:42Can you turn something peculiar up there, please?
0:06:42 > 0:06:45HE GIGGLES AND TITTERS
0:06:45 > 0:06:48And even peculiarer.
0:06:48 > 0:06:50Ooh, I like that. Ooh!
0:06:50 > 0:06:54That's divine, could you... Ooh, I do feel ill.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57Stop taking the pills. They can do that sort of thing.
0:06:57 > 0:06:59Can I go to normal, please?
0:06:59 > 0:07:03Could you just increase the tan a bit? Just give me a little tan.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08See? South of France? Don't spend a penny.
0:07:14 > 0:07:19Doodly-doo... Oh, that's better. Thank you. I like being normal.
0:07:19 > 0:07:24And then there's the other perks, like you get to meet the stars.
0:07:24 > 0:07:28The stars, yes. I was talking to the Simon Park Orchestra today.
0:07:28 > 0:07:30Wonderful bunch of ladies.
0:07:30 > 0:07:34And then Elton John, who throws a fabulous party.
0:07:34 > 0:07:37And all them, so free records and stars,
0:07:37 > 0:07:39what more could one ask for?
0:07:39 > 0:07:44I mean, for what more could one ask, being the BBC. Doodly-doo.
0:07:44 > 0:07:46The tea is terrible though.
0:07:46 > 0:07:48How long does it take you to do your own radio show?
0:07:48 > 0:07:53About... About a day, really.
0:07:53 > 0:07:58And then another day to edit out all the naughty bits that they'll never accept,
0:07:58 > 0:08:01and then another day to edit all the naughty bits together,
0:08:01 > 0:08:04erase them, and you end up with a few reels of tape
0:08:04 > 0:08:06because they are very mean with the tape here.
0:08:06 > 0:08:08Very mean with the tape. Very mean.
0:08:08 > 0:08:12Have you ever done anything terribly wrong, like smashing a camera?
0:08:12 > 0:08:14Yes, I joined Top Of The Pops!
0:08:14 > 0:08:18No, I haven't smashed the cameras.
0:08:18 > 0:08:20I'll do that before I leave.
0:08:20 > 0:08:23I think it should be live though. That's what I think,
0:08:23 > 0:08:27because then it would be fab and there'd be real mistakes then.
0:08:27 > 0:08:30Wouldn't that be exciting? Real mistakes.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33I used to do that on Ready Steady Go, which we can't mention,
0:08:33 > 0:08:36and that's quite exciting because a lot of people used to watch
0:08:36 > 0:08:38- just to see what went wrong. - Why can't you mention it?
0:08:38 > 0:08:40- And it did, a lot. - Why can't you mention it?
0:08:40 > 0:08:41Mention what?
0:08:41 > 0:08:44Mention what, what's she talking about, mention what?
0:08:44 > 0:08:50Why did you install a £13,000 studio into your home?
0:08:50 > 0:08:54Well, it saves coming to London and we live about 220 miles away
0:08:54 > 0:08:58so that's 440 a week.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02That's, in a year, 440 times 42... 52 weeks in a year?
0:09:02 > 0:09:05Ask Noel Edmonds, he's good with sums.
0:09:05 > 0:09:09But it saved me all that travelling and I like fiddling with tape.
0:09:09 > 0:09:14It's my hobby. I like fiddling...with tape.
0:09:14 > 0:09:15My hobby, that is.
0:09:15 > 0:09:19Why don't you just move to London, or do you like the country better?
0:09:19 > 0:09:23Yes, the country's lovely. Lovely stuff, it is.
0:09:23 > 0:09:26All grass and stuff and trees, it's wonderful.
0:09:26 > 0:09:30London's nice though, in contrast, so when I do come to London,
0:09:30 > 0:09:32it's nice, but if I was in it all the time,
0:09:32 > 0:09:35I don't think I'd think it was nice a lot.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38But it's the nicest city in the world, I think.
0:09:38 > 0:09:39Thank you very much. >
0:09:39 > 0:09:41Thank you.
0:09:41 > 0:09:44Well, it's just been so wonderful!
0:09:45 > 0:09:47Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd