0:00:04 > 0:00:07MUSIC: "It Takes Two" by Marvin Gaye and Kim Weston
0:00:07 > 0:00:09# One can have a dream, baby
0:00:09 > 0:00:12# Two can make that dream so real
0:00:14 > 0:00:16# One can talk about being in love
0:00:16 > 0:00:18# Two can say how it really feels
0:00:20 > 0:00:22# One can wish upon a star
0:00:22 > 0:00:26# Two can make that wish come true, yeah
0:00:26 > 0:00:28# One can stand alone in the dark
0:00:28 > 0:00:31# Two can make the light shine through
0:00:31 > 0:00:34# It takes two, baby
0:00:34 > 0:00:38# It takes two, baby
0:00:38 > 0:00:40# Me and you... #
0:00:40 > 0:00:43APPLAUSE
0:00:43 > 0:00:46Hello, and welcome to All About Two,
0:00:46 > 0:00:48a celebration of 50 years of BBC Two.
0:00:48 > 0:00:52From its opening night in April 1964, the channel has,
0:00:52 > 0:00:54for the last five decades, launched careers,
0:00:54 > 0:00:57captured extraordinary moments, created broadcasting history
0:00:57 > 0:00:58and baked a lot of cake.
0:00:58 > 0:01:00I'm Dara O Briain, and tonight
0:01:00 > 0:01:03we'll be playing the ultimate, if not the only, quiz about BBC Two.
0:01:03 > 0:01:06Answering questions about it are six panellists.
0:01:06 > 0:01:09Led by team captain Brian Cox, we have Hairy Biker Dave Myers
0:01:09 > 0:01:11and from the Kumars, it's Meera Syal.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13APPLAUSE
0:01:14 > 0:01:18And led by team captain Hugh Dennis,
0:01:18 > 0:01:21The Choir's Gareth Malone, and from Dragons' Den, Deborah Meaden.
0:01:21 > 0:01:23APPLAUSE
0:01:25 > 0:01:28And as if that wasn't enough, we're joined by the human encyclopaedia
0:01:28 > 0:01:31himself from Pointless, the nearly omniscient Mr Richard Osman.
0:01:31 > 0:01:33APPLAUSE
0:01:34 > 0:01:37- Richard, thank you for joining us. - Pleasure.- To have actually properly
0:01:37 > 0:01:40boned up on this, how much would you have had to have viewed?
0:01:40 > 0:01:44Well, there's been over 280,000 hours of BBC Two output.
0:01:44 > 0:01:46I've watched every single bit of it,
0:01:46 > 0:01:49apart from, I missed one episode of Flog It!
0:01:49 > 0:01:52And I had to go to the loo during Michael Portillo's Great Railway Journeys
0:01:52 > 0:01:54but apart from that, I've seen everything.
0:01:54 > 0:01:57Fabulous. We will go to you as our source of information at all times.
0:01:57 > 0:02:00We've met our guests. Let's set the scene and remind ourselves
0:02:00 > 0:02:03of some of the highlights from the channel's past 50 years.
0:02:03 > 0:02:07Good evening. This is BBC Two.
0:02:07 > 0:02:10MUSIC: "Praise You" by Fatboy Slim
0:02:15 > 0:02:20# We've come a long, long way together
0:02:20 > 0:02:24# Through the hard times and the good
0:02:24 > 0:02:28# I have to celebrate you, baby
0:02:28 > 0:02:34# I have to praise you like I should. #
0:02:34 > 0:02:38Don't move, and tell all your friends to turn onto BBC Two.
0:02:38 > 0:02:42- Let's look around. - There is so much here for us to see.
0:02:42 > 0:02:45I think we have to look back retrospectively.
0:02:45 > 0:02:46Welcome to Match Of The Day,
0:02:46 > 0:02:50the first of a weekly series coming to you every Saturday on BBC Two.
0:02:54 > 0:02:55Let's rock.
0:03:03 > 0:03:06# Mince pies, mince pies, mince pies, more mince pies... #
0:03:06 > 0:03:08I need a slight drink.
0:03:08 > 0:03:09And now more sherry.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12A bit like rose-water and witch hazel.
0:03:12 > 0:03:14THEY LAUGH
0:03:14 > 0:03:15What's so funny?
0:03:17 > 0:03:20What's it like fighting a campaign you know you're going to lose?
0:03:20 > 0:03:23THEY SHUDDER
0:03:25 > 0:03:27This is a local shop for local people!
0:03:27 > 0:03:31Because ultimately we are part of the universe.
0:03:32 > 0:03:34That's magic!
0:03:36 > 0:03:37Walkies!
0:03:37 > 0:03:39Duck!
0:03:41 > 0:03:44It's full of fat, juicy maggots.
0:03:49 > 0:03:51Tap, tap, tap.
0:03:57 > 0:04:01- He was completely wild. - Wild? I was absolutely livid.
0:04:01 > 0:04:06And it's very, very rare that there is any violence.
0:04:07 > 0:04:12We interrupt this programme to tell you that this is an official BBC interruption.
0:04:12 > 0:04:15LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:04:21 > 0:04:24Oh, yes. The one thing we can guarantee,
0:04:24 > 0:04:26there will be montages as the show goes on.
0:04:26 > 0:04:28Here's how the quiz works, however.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30In each round, we have a board of pictures.
0:04:30 > 0:04:32There is a BBC Two related game behind each one of them
0:04:32 > 0:04:35and some of them even feature the odd mystery guest.
0:04:35 > 0:04:37Our first board is themed around ground-breakers,
0:04:37 > 0:04:41the trailblazing shows, pioneering people and all-round daft moments
0:04:41 > 0:04:43that no other channel saw fit to try first.
0:04:43 > 0:04:46To get started, let's have a look at the channel's very first broadcast.
0:04:48 > 0:04:50GENTLE CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS
0:04:59 > 0:05:01Well, good evening, and as I said a few minutes ago,
0:05:01 > 0:05:06only, I understand, nobody could hear me, welcome to BBC Two
0:05:06 > 0:05:10from where it all began here in Studio A in Alexandra Palace.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12Now, it's the newsroom of channel two,
0:05:12 > 0:05:16and tonight, of all nights, there has been a loss of electric power
0:05:16 > 0:05:19at our main studios, the Television Centre in West London.
0:05:19 > 0:05:21APPLAUSE
0:05:23 > 0:05:26Yes, that's the awkward thing about this particular anniversary.
0:05:26 > 0:05:30That was BBC Two's very first broadcast on 20th April 1964,
0:05:30 > 0:05:33when the entire schedule for the opening night had to be abandoned
0:05:33 > 0:05:35due to a power cut. What did people miss, Richard?
0:05:35 > 0:05:37What they were going to have, there was supposed to be
0:05:37 > 0:05:40- a Cole Porter musical, which doesn't sound too bad.- No.
0:05:40 > 0:05:43- There was going to be fireworks live from Southend Pier.- Glamorous.
0:05:43 > 0:05:44Sounds slightly less good.
0:05:44 > 0:05:49And a performance from the Soviet Union's leading comedian, apparently.
0:05:49 > 0:05:50LAUGHTER
0:05:50 > 0:05:51And then at 10pm,
0:05:51 > 0:05:54- there was a three-year-old repeat of Mock The Week.- Yes!
0:05:54 > 0:05:56LAUGHTER
0:05:56 > 0:05:58Oh, yeah, been around for a while.
0:05:58 > 0:06:02So even though the channel's first night didn't go to plan,
0:06:02 > 0:06:05BBC Two has achieved plenty of other successful firsts since then.
0:06:05 > 0:06:08On the board are nine pictures in the channel's Hall of Fame
0:06:08 > 0:06:11and some of them are answers to questions in this first round,
0:06:11 > 0:06:13so, both teams, fingers on buzzers if you can, please.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15Here is our first question.
0:06:15 > 0:06:17Which one of these stars appeared
0:06:17 > 0:06:19in the first full programme to be broadcast...?
0:06:19 > 0:06:20BUZZER
0:06:20 > 0:06:23Am I allowed to do it before you've asked the question?
0:06:23 > 0:06:24You are, of course,
0:06:24 > 0:06:27because I'm not going to say anything other than "on BBC Two"
0:06:27 > 0:06:30cos that would be a weird and sudden change of direction.
0:06:30 > 0:06:33- Who was the first star? - I think I agree with you on this.
0:06:33 > 0:06:34I think it's Humpty.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36You think it's Humpty?
0:06:36 > 0:06:38Is that what his name was? Is that Humpty Dumpty?
0:06:38 > 0:06:41You can't in a quiz go, "Is that what his name was?"
0:06:41 > 0:06:44Well, I don't know what the rules are.
0:06:44 > 0:06:47No, I think he was on Play School, if it's a him.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50I'm referring to him as a him. He's actually made of cloth.
0:06:51 > 0:06:54The answer is, of course, Humpty. Congratulations,
0:06:54 > 0:06:56thank you very much, Hugh Dennis, you got that right.
0:06:56 > 0:06:58APPLAUSE
0:06:58 > 0:07:00After power was restored the day after the failed launch,
0:07:00 > 0:07:04Play School became the first full programme to be shown on BBC Two,
0:07:04 > 0:07:08- and making their first appearance in some time...- No!
0:07:08 > 0:07:12- Genuinely, this is Humpty!- Aww!
0:07:12 > 0:07:13APPLAUSE
0:07:17 > 0:07:19Jemima!
0:07:19 > 0:07:20Now, I have to be very careful here.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22How amazing!
0:07:22 > 0:07:25And the next, who have to be presented in order...
0:07:25 > 0:07:27Big Ted!
0:07:27 > 0:07:30- And, of course...- Little Ted!
0:07:32 > 0:07:35Now, I'll leave it with yourselves while you're getting all doey-eyed,
0:07:35 > 0:07:39I've never seen a stuffed toy destroy an audience quite as much.
0:07:39 > 0:07:42"Aww! Look at Humpty!" I could push him off the edge.
0:07:42 > 0:07:45I could push him off the edge if you want.
0:07:45 > 0:07:48Introduce a note of tension into this if you want.
0:07:48 > 0:07:50- She was my first crush.- Really?
0:07:50 > 0:07:52- Who are we missing?- Humpty.
0:07:52 > 0:07:55No, that's Humpty there.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57- Hamble.- Oh, Hamble, yes.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00We're missing two, actually. But this may be a generational thing.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02We're missing Hamble. That's Hamble there,
0:08:02 > 0:08:03who, let's face it,
0:08:03 > 0:08:06always looked freaky and possessed,
0:08:06 > 0:08:08like a devil or something out of a horror movie.
0:08:08 > 0:08:10She was later replaced by Poppy.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12- That's Poppy there. - I remember Poppy.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15Neither of Poppy or Hamble are here
0:08:15 > 0:08:18because they're both currently appearing in landfill.
0:08:18 > 0:08:20LAUGHTER
0:08:21 > 0:08:22What?
0:08:22 > 0:08:24OK, this...
0:08:24 > 0:08:26You know what these are genuinely worth?
0:08:26 > 0:08:28There's an insurance docket for this.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31- These are incredibly expensive. - Really?- Yeah, absolutely.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Oh, God, the ink!
0:08:33 > 0:08:34I'm going to put them down.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36Yes, it was, Play School was the very first show.
0:08:36 > 0:08:39We can actually see this. This is quite a controversial clip.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42This is a clip of the original dolls in action.
0:08:42 > 0:08:43Big Ted had it.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47There's a letter in the...
0:08:48 > 0:08:49Big Ted, sit up.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51Now Little Ted's fallen over. My goodness.
0:08:51 > 0:08:53There's a letter in the story today.
0:09:00 > 0:09:03I'm an artist! How am I expected to work with these amateurs?
0:09:03 > 0:09:05For God's sake!
0:09:05 > 0:09:07APPLAUSE
0:09:11 > 0:09:14That's presenter Fred Harris. That was never broadcast, by the way.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16Imagine the trauma. The actual hideous trauma.
0:09:16 > 0:09:18How long did Play School run for?
0:09:18 > 0:09:2024 years, Play School ran, yeah.
0:09:20 > 0:09:22Also the Play School clock
0:09:22 > 0:09:24once famously caused industrial action at the BBC.
0:09:24 > 0:09:27There was an argument as to whether it was a prop or special effects
0:09:27 > 0:09:30and those were controlled by two completely different unions.
0:09:30 > 0:09:32It went on for about three weeks.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34Douglas Adams had written an episode of Doctor Who.
0:09:34 > 0:09:37Never saw the light of day because of this strike.
0:09:37 > 0:09:39Fawlty Towers was postponed.
0:09:39 > 0:09:42Big Ted crossed the picket line, Little Ted didn't.
0:09:42 > 0:09:46- Even to this day, there's problems between them.- Yeah.
0:09:46 > 0:09:47You can still see the scabs.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49AUDIENCE GROANS
0:09:49 > 0:09:50What?
0:09:51 > 0:09:53Please, fingers back on buzzers.
0:09:53 > 0:09:57Which one of these stars created a world first after a phone call
0:09:57 > 0:09:59to the UK Rocketry Association?
0:09:59 > 0:10:00BELL
0:10:00 > 0:10:01Brian's team.
0:10:01 > 0:10:02Is that Heinz Wolff up there?
0:10:02 > 0:10:04It is Professor Heinz Wolff.
0:10:04 > 0:10:06So would you go for Professor Heinz Wolff?
0:10:06 > 0:10:09I will believe anything you say, Brian.
0:10:09 > 0:10:10LAUGHTER
0:10:12 > 0:10:14Well...
0:10:14 > 0:10:16APPLAUSE
0:10:19 > 0:10:21We're going to go with Sir Heinz Wolff.
0:10:21 > 0:10:23You're going to go Professor Heinz Wolff,
0:10:23 > 0:10:27which is incorrect, but thank you for taking your time to tell us.
0:10:27 > 0:10:30- HUGH DENNIS:- I think it's probably Clarkson, was it? Do you think?
0:10:30 > 0:10:33- And then he'll have fired something from somewhere.- Yeah.
0:10:33 > 0:10:37That's absolutely right. Well done, Hugh Dennis, and your team.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39APPLAUSE
0:10:40 > 0:10:41I thought it was Heinz Wolff.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43It was Top Gear's Jeremy Clarkson.
0:10:43 > 0:10:46The show attached rockets to a Mini as they attempted to become
0:10:46 > 0:10:49the first people to send a car off a ski jump. Very important work.
0:10:49 > 0:10:53And you thought your work on the Large Hadron Collider was important.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55No, it turns out. Let see how they got on.
0:10:55 > 0:10:56Armed.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59Five, four, three,
0:10:59 > 0:11:02two, one. Initiate.
0:11:19 > 0:11:20THEY LAUGH
0:11:20 > 0:11:21Wall's going to be needed!
0:11:24 > 0:11:26THEY LAUGH
0:11:26 > 0:11:28APPLAUSE
0:11:32 > 0:11:35So, Jeremy Clarkson of Top Gear rather than Professor Heinz Wolff
0:11:35 > 0:11:37of The Great Egg Race, one of the classic shows.
0:11:37 > 0:11:40While we're on Top Gear, looking at that board again, Hugh,
0:11:40 > 0:11:42tell me which person on that board
0:11:42 > 0:11:44was the show's first ever presenter.
0:11:44 > 0:11:47- BRIAN COX:- I really want to say Peter Cook.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50Was it Heinz Wolff? It must have been Heinz Wolff.
0:11:50 > 0:11:52You're going for Heinz Wolff again.
0:11:52 > 0:11:54You're going to have to get off this Heinz Wolff thing.
0:11:54 > 0:11:56Let it go, man. Let it go.
0:11:56 > 0:11:57It wasn't Heinz Wolff.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59- Angela Rippon.- You're going to go for Angela Rippon.
0:11:59 > 0:12:02- You're right again! This is ridiculous.- No way!
0:12:02 > 0:12:04Well done, Hugh Dennis. Angela Rippon, yes.
0:12:04 > 0:12:06APPLAUSE
0:12:06 > 0:12:10It was Angela Rippon who launched the first episode back in 1977.
0:12:10 > 0:12:12Here she is.
0:12:12 > 0:12:14Good evening, and welcome, once again, to Top Gear.
0:12:14 > 0:12:18Now, this is the latest car from Jaguar. It's the Phase Three 5.3
0:12:18 > 0:12:21and Noel Edmonds is going to be giving it a road test
0:12:21 > 0:12:23a little later in tonight's programme.
0:12:23 > 0:12:25But we're not going to watch that.
0:12:25 > 0:12:27APPLAUSE
0:12:28 > 0:12:30Kate Humble would have been a good guess as well.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33Kate Humble also presented Top Gear in the early 2000s.
0:12:33 > 0:12:34It's a huge success for the BBC, Top Gear.
0:12:34 > 0:12:37It's shown in over 170 countries worldwide.
0:12:37 > 0:12:40It gets 350 million viewers per week.
0:12:40 > 0:12:42It's made over £100 million for the BBC.
0:12:42 > 0:12:45It's made over £75 million for the stonewashed denim industry.
0:12:45 > 0:12:47It's an extraordinary phenomenon.
0:12:47 > 0:12:49OK, fingers back on buzzers again.
0:12:49 > 0:12:53Who now hosts a show that only attracted 20,000 viewers
0:12:53 > 0:12:55on its first ever episode
0:12:55 > 0:12:56when it was launched on BBC Two?
0:12:56 > 0:12:58BELL
0:12:58 > 0:12:59Brian again.
0:12:59 > 0:13:01Kate Humble?
0:13:01 > 0:13:02Not Kate Humble, no.
0:13:02 > 0:13:03BUZZER
0:13:03 > 0:13:06- It's going to be Heinz Wolff. - Was it Heinz Wolff?
0:13:06 > 0:13:07LAUGHTER
0:13:07 > 0:13:09Neither Humble nor Wolff.
0:13:09 > 0:13:11Why don't we say Match Of The Day
0:13:11 > 0:13:14wasn't watched by very many people when it was first broadcast?
0:13:14 > 0:13:17You're absolutely right. They get a point for that. Very good.
0:13:17 > 0:13:19APPLAUSE
0:13:22 > 0:13:23Yes, it is Gary Lineker.
0:13:23 > 0:13:27Match Of The Day actually started life 50 years ago on BBC Two
0:13:27 > 0:13:29and we can have a look at the first ever game.
0:13:34 > 0:13:36COMMENTATOR: The scorer, Hunt,
0:13:36 > 0:13:38Liverpool inside right.
0:13:40 > 0:13:44And a black cat is running on the far side. There it is!
0:13:44 > 0:13:45A black cat.
0:13:48 > 0:13:50Now, I know it's a cat,
0:13:50 > 0:13:55I wonder which side it supports. Arsenal or Liverpool.
0:13:55 > 0:13:56APPLAUSE
0:13:58 > 0:13:59"I know it's a cat!"
0:14:02 > 0:14:06I just so, so wanted someone to volley it into the net.
0:14:08 > 0:14:11I've often wondered, what were the chances that the first time
0:14:11 > 0:14:13you put cameras into a football stadium,
0:14:13 > 0:14:15you capture a match for the first time,
0:14:15 > 0:14:19and the first ever YouTube clip of a funny cat doing an adorable thing.
0:14:19 > 0:14:21Only 20,000 viewers, though.
0:14:21 > 0:14:24Yes, there were more people in the stadium than watched on TV.
0:14:24 > 0:14:2640,000 people in the stadium, 20,000 viewers.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28They only commissioned it in the first place
0:14:28 > 0:14:31because the World Cup was starting a couple of years later
0:14:31 > 0:14:34and they used it to train cameramen up. That was the only reason
0:14:34 > 0:14:37they put it on. And the cameraman there did a cracking job on the cat.
0:14:37 > 0:14:40He did a very good job. OK, at the end of that round,
0:14:40 > 0:14:42Brian's team, I'm going to give you two points.
0:14:42 > 0:14:44Hugh's team have three points.
0:14:44 > 0:14:45APPLAUSE
0:14:48 > 0:14:51Time for more fantastic first innovations from BBC Two.
0:14:51 > 0:14:52Let's have our next game.
0:14:57 > 0:14:59Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Later.
0:15:02 > 0:15:04Hello. Welcome to this week's Whistle Test.
0:15:04 > 0:15:08Ladies and gentlemen, meet our distinguished guest, Duke Ellington.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15The first ever British television performance,
0:15:15 > 0:15:17I'm delighted to say, of these next artists.
0:15:17 > 0:15:20Our next artists are brand-new.
0:15:20 > 0:15:22Making her TV debut, Adele.
0:15:22 > 0:15:25Now, you may remember the tartan kilts and scarves
0:15:25 > 0:15:29- of their last appearance...- Hi, Bob. - Hi, Ray. How are you doing?
0:15:33 > 0:15:36APPLAUSE
0:15:38 > 0:15:4150 years of ground-breaking musical moments on BBC Two.
0:15:41 > 0:15:44For our next game, from The Old Grey Whistle Test,
0:15:44 > 0:15:47please welcome to the studio Whispering Bob Harris.
0:15:47 > 0:15:49APPLAUSE
0:15:49 > 0:15:52- Good to have you here.- Thank you.
0:15:55 > 0:15:56Bob, do the...
0:15:56 > 0:15:59Let's just enjoy this. Do the Hall of Fame for me.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Who made their first TV appearances on BBC Two?
0:16:01 > 0:16:04People like Bonnie Raitt, The Eagles, Jackson Browne,
0:16:04 > 0:16:09bands like Family, Wishbone Ash, the great UK bands of the early '70s...
0:16:09 > 0:16:12- Bob Marley? Bob Marley made his first appearance?- Bob Marley,
0:16:12 > 0:16:13Curtis Mayfield...
0:16:13 > 0:16:16Bob Marley in particular was a fantastic day, it really was.
0:16:16 > 0:16:19That was his first ever UK television appearance, so, yeah.
0:16:19 > 0:16:22And what, by the way, for younger viewers,
0:16:22 > 0:16:25I obviously know the answer to this, but for those who don't,
0:16:25 > 0:16:27what does it mean - the old grey whistle test?
0:16:27 > 0:16:30It's a sort of shortening of a process that used to take place
0:16:30 > 0:16:33around what they used to call the songwriting factories.
0:16:33 > 0:16:37You'd get songwriters working there, basically on a nine-to-five day,
0:16:37 > 0:16:40people like Carole King and Neil Sedaka.
0:16:40 > 0:16:44These buildings were serviced by, you know, the guy who ran the lift,
0:16:44 > 0:16:47the receptionist, the cleaners, all these people used to have...
0:16:47 > 0:16:50they were given the nickname the "old greys".
0:16:50 > 0:16:51So at the end of the week,
0:16:51 > 0:16:56all the likely songs were played to the old greys
0:16:56 > 0:17:00and the ones they remembered passed the old grey whistle test.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03- That's...- That was it. There we are, that was it.
0:17:03 > 0:17:05APPLAUSE
0:17:10 > 0:17:14And the other thing about it, one of the great things about the show was,
0:17:14 > 0:17:16to start with, if you can believe it, it was open-ended
0:17:16 > 0:17:21because it was the final programme on BBC Two that evening, right,
0:17:21 > 0:17:25and so if we wanted to extend for 15 or 20 minutes any week, we could.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28- What a luxury that was. - That was beautiful.
0:17:28 > 0:17:32And at what point, then, did people phone in and vote bands off?
0:17:32 > 0:17:34LAUGHTER
0:17:34 > 0:17:38And spun the chair around and hit the... Yeah.
0:17:38 > 0:17:39OK. As our tribute,
0:17:39 > 0:17:42Bob is going to be whistling some classic BBC Two theme tunes.
0:17:42 > 0:17:44That seems like an appalling tribute
0:17:44 > 0:17:45but thank you for taking part anyway.
0:17:45 > 0:17:48Hugh's team, this game is only for yourselves,
0:17:48 > 0:17:49so you can just relax and enjoy it.
0:17:49 > 0:17:51We want you to identify the theme tune.
0:17:51 > 0:17:53You're not on your own, though, of course, Bob.
0:17:53 > 0:17:55- I've got The Whistlettes.- You do.
0:17:55 > 0:17:57He's got some old grey whistlers,
0:17:57 > 0:17:59some truly great blasts from BBC Two's past.
0:17:59 > 0:18:03Please welcome kids' TV hero Johnny Ball...
0:18:03 > 0:18:06APPLAUSE
0:18:06 > 0:18:08..from Ground Force, Tommy Walsh...
0:18:10 > 0:18:13..you know him as Joe from The Royle Family, it's Peter Martin...
0:18:16 > 0:18:19..and the man not quite single-handedly responsible,
0:18:19 > 0:18:23but nonetheless there for the most watched moment in BBC Two's history,
0:18:23 > 0:18:2518.5 million people watched him
0:18:25 > 0:18:29win the World Snooker Championship in 1985, it's Dennis Taylor.
0:18:29 > 0:18:31CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:18:35 > 0:18:37Five men for whom we have a great deal of affection,
0:18:37 > 0:18:40who've achieved many things and now we're going to get them to whistle.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45OK, let's have the first tune, please.
0:18:45 > 0:18:47SERIES OF STACCATO NOTES
0:18:53 > 0:18:55BUZZER Ski Sunday?
0:18:55 > 0:18:57It was Ski Sunday. Let's hear it properly.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00THEME MUSIC FROM SKI SUNDAY PLAYS
0:19:03 > 0:19:04Does that give it away?
0:19:07 > 0:19:10One of you looks like you're churning butter.
0:19:11 > 0:19:14OK, very, very good. Is this nerve-racking, by the way, lads?
0:19:14 > 0:19:17Dennis, of all the moments you've had on BBC Two?
0:19:17 > 0:19:20This is worse than playing Steve Davis.
0:19:21 > 0:19:24OK, let's have a second tune please.
0:19:24 > 0:19:27VARIETY OF NOTES WHISTLED HALTINGLY
0:19:36 > 0:19:38VARIETY OF NOTES AND RHYTHMS
0:19:40 > 0:19:42BUZZER
0:19:42 > 0:19:45- Hugh, please. - I don't think even they know what...
0:19:45 > 0:19:48LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:19:53 > 0:19:59I'm also quietly beginning to suspect two of them can't whistle.
0:19:59 > 0:20:02There is at least two of them going, "Ooo-ooo!"
0:20:03 > 0:20:04BUZZER
0:20:04 > 0:20:08- What is it?- I think it's by Howard Goodall, it's Red Dwarf.
0:20:08 > 0:20:11You're absolutely right. Well done.
0:20:14 > 0:20:18For the one or two of you who might not have recognised it from this,
0:20:18 > 0:20:21why don't we hear just how Red Dwarf normally sounds?
0:20:21 > 0:20:24RED DWARF THEME MUSIC
0:20:34 > 0:20:38Why are they in the transporter room of the Enterprise?
0:20:42 > 0:20:44When their music is already transporting us!
0:20:44 > 0:20:46LAUGHTER
0:20:47 > 0:20:49One final tune, please, gentlemen.
0:20:49 > 0:20:51SOLO WHISTLING
0:20:52 > 0:20:55LONG, SLOW NOTES
0:21:00 > 0:21:02OTHERS JOIN IN
0:21:12 > 0:21:14BUZZER
0:21:14 > 0:21:16- Hugh? - Can we get a dog to come in...?
0:21:24 > 0:21:26This is difficult, I have to say.
0:21:26 > 0:21:29It's more the theme for a strand of shows
0:21:29 > 0:21:31rather than an individual show.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34Ah, OK, so it's going to be like Arena.
0:21:35 > 0:21:38Yes, very good. You're absolutely right.
0:21:40 > 0:21:45That was, unbelievably, BBC Two's flagship arts series Arena.
0:21:45 > 0:21:49Here, please, bask in what I think is the most mournful and depressing
0:21:49 > 0:21:52theme tune in 50 years of BBC theme tunes. Here it is.
0:21:52 > 0:21:53You try whistling it!
0:21:55 > 0:21:57THEME TUNE FROM ARENA
0:22:05 > 0:22:06HE WHISTLES ALONG
0:22:11 > 0:22:12CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:22:14 > 0:22:17Where will you ever hear that piece of music from another room
0:22:17 > 0:22:20and go, "Arena!" And go running in to have a look.
0:22:20 > 0:22:23It's the most mournful thing in the world.
0:22:23 > 0:22:25I've actually got one extra question for Gareth, if I might.
0:22:25 > 0:22:29I want to show you a clip from the 1974 show Face The Music.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31See if you can answer this question.
0:22:31 > 0:22:34I think everybody is familiar with this infernal machine
0:22:34 > 0:22:36where you, the panel, just have to guess what I'm playing
0:22:36 > 0:22:39from the look and the clatter.
0:22:40 > 0:22:43PIANO KEYS RATTLE, NO MUSIC
0:22:49 > 0:22:55- Gareth?- That was a real...? That's real?- That's real, yes.
0:22:55 > 0:22:58Whatever it is, it's going to be easier than the whistling.
0:22:58 > 0:23:01- LAUGHTER - Oh, come on! Come on!
0:23:01 > 0:23:06- Are you giving it a go?- Yeah.- If you get the composer, I will give you...
0:23:06 > 0:23:09- Bach?- If you get the composer... Just keep doing that.
0:23:11 > 0:23:16- Schnittke?- Schnittke?! You're making things up now, aren't you?
0:23:16 > 0:23:19Was it Schutz or Scheidt or Schein?
0:23:21 > 0:23:23- You're nearly there. - Schutz, Scheidt or Schein -
0:23:23 > 0:23:26three well-known German composers.
0:23:26 > 0:23:28- Schu... Schu...- Schubert, perhaps?
0:23:28 > 0:23:31You're saying Schubert? OK, let's have a look and see if it was.
0:23:31 > 0:23:35Yes, it's the Schubert Impromptus E Flat Opus 90 Number 2, or D899.
0:23:35 > 0:23:37That brings us to the end of the programme. Time is up.
0:23:42 > 0:23:45Thank you very much. Hugh's team, I'm proud to give you three points.
0:23:45 > 0:23:47- That was very, very good. - APPLAUSE
0:23:47 > 0:23:49But mainly, ladies and gentlemen...
0:23:50 > 0:23:55..I believe deserving a huge hand for whistling Bob Harris's band,
0:23:55 > 0:23:58Johnny Ball, Tommy Walsh, Peter Martin and Dennis Taylor.
0:23:58 > 0:24:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:24:07 > 0:24:08OK, time for our next round.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14Knowing me Alan Partridge, knowing you...
0:24:14 > 0:24:16- A-ha.- # Take it now or leave it... #
0:24:16 > 0:24:19- A-ha!- # Now is all we get... #- A-ha!
0:24:19 > 0:24:23- Hello, camp David. EFFEMINATELY:- Well, hello, Alan.
0:24:23 > 0:24:25You used this pay channel.
0:24:29 > 0:24:31Oh, right, yeah. It's very confusing.
0:24:31 > 0:24:37# Knowing me, knowing you
0:24:37 > 0:24:41- BOTH: # A-ha.- #
0:24:42 > 0:24:44Smell my cheese, you mother!
0:24:49 > 0:24:52The legendary Alan Partridge there.
0:24:52 > 0:24:56Now, Alan famously pitched plenty of videos for new shows,
0:24:56 > 0:24:58but every now and then, BBC Two managed to outdo him
0:24:58 > 0:25:02by launching even more unlikely television programmes.
0:25:02 > 0:25:05I'm going to give Brian's team some titles and all you have to do
0:25:05 > 0:25:10is tell me if they were Partridge pitches or genuine shows on BBC Two.
0:25:10 > 0:25:13Joining us to help me from Knowing Me Knowing You, I'm Alan Partridge,
0:25:13 > 0:25:17The Day Today and The Thick Of It, it's BBC Two's Rebecca Front.
0:25:17 > 0:25:18APPLAUSE
0:25:18 > 0:25:20Lovely to have you with us.
0:25:25 > 0:25:28Rebecca, you have appeared with so many
0:25:28 > 0:25:31and in so many fantastic comedy shows.
0:25:31 > 0:25:35For the early Partridges, you played how many different characters?
0:25:35 > 0:25:39- I think six. I was in every episode. - Were you in the radio show before?
0:25:39 > 0:25:43- I was.- So there's all those as well.- Yes, quite a range.
0:25:43 > 0:25:46You were quite a foil to Alan Partridge for a long time.
0:25:46 > 0:25:48Yes, I suppose I was. It was huge fun.
0:25:48 > 0:25:53A lot of wigs and teeth and make-up to prop me up and get me through.
0:25:53 > 0:25:55This round is about terrible television ideas.
0:25:55 > 0:25:58As a performer who relies on the trust you have with broadcasters,
0:25:58 > 0:26:01I wouldn't ask you ever to reveal which terrible television ideas
0:26:01 > 0:26:04you have ever been approached to do.
0:26:04 > 0:26:07So those kind of shows, those kind of horrendous shows,
0:26:07 > 0:26:10some of which Partridge made a speciality in pitching,
0:26:10 > 0:26:13I want you to pitch here. Our first show title, please.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16OK, pro-celebrity clay pigeon shooting
0:26:16 > 0:26:19with Ian Botham and Suzi Quatro.
0:26:20 > 0:26:25Is it a genuine show on BBC Two or a Partridge pitch?
0:26:25 > 0:26:29- I think that sounds genuine. - I think it would be genuine.
0:26:29 > 0:26:32Suzi Quatro bothers me slightly. Not in general.
0:26:35 > 0:26:38- You could see Ian Botham...- A kind of weird admission to have.
0:26:38 > 0:26:41It's competitive, so you'd watch it.
0:26:41 > 0:26:44There is an element of jeopardy, which they love.
0:26:44 > 0:26:47Jeopardy? In what sense? What could possibly go wrong?
0:26:47 > 0:26:49Well, Ian Botham could shoot Suzi Quatro.
0:26:49 > 0:26:53They fire Suzi Quatro out of a trebuchet and...
0:26:53 > 0:26:56So what do we think, do we think that's real?
0:26:56 > 0:27:00- It sounds horribly familiar from Partridge.- What do we think?
0:27:00 > 0:27:03- I think that's real. - I think it's real.
0:27:03 > 0:27:05- Is it real?- It's real.
0:27:11 > 0:27:18It was a BBC Two show from 1987. Let us enjoy this. Please, bask in this.
0:27:18 > 0:27:21First Ian Botham. He picks a trap.
0:27:21 > 0:27:26Anything he gets in that trap, he scores. 3, 7, or 11.
0:27:26 > 0:27:29Pull!
0:27:29 > 0:27:307 scored.
0:27:30 > 0:27:32Good shooting by Ian.
0:27:32 > 0:27:33APPLAUSE
0:27:38 > 0:27:40It was called Starshot.
0:27:40 > 0:27:44Imagine how much better Splash! would be if people had a shotgun.
0:27:46 > 0:27:49OK, let's have a second one, please.
0:27:49 > 0:27:55OK, Bonington. A mountaineering drama starring Brian Blessed.
0:27:57 > 0:28:00You see, I think that's real.
0:28:00 > 0:28:05Because I know Brian Blessed and I know that he climbed Everest
0:28:05 > 0:28:09without oxygen and almost got to the top.
0:28:09 > 0:28:13And he tells a story of how somebody had a medical emergency above him.
0:28:13 > 0:28:15I think they were French. And he was like...
0:28:15 > 0:28:17- AS BRIAN BLESSED: - "The bastard!
0:28:17 > 0:28:21"I'm on my way to the summit! I had to carry..."
0:28:21 > 0:28:23So I think...
0:28:23 > 0:28:25LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:28:28 > 0:28:30There's so many Brian Blessed mountaineering stories
0:28:30 > 0:28:35and none of them can be told on BBC Two. You probably know many.
0:28:35 > 0:28:39Doesn't he have a freakishly high level of oxygen in his blood?
0:28:39 > 0:28:42Yes, he does. He also once punched a polar bear in the face.
0:28:43 > 0:28:45That's an actual true story.
0:28:45 > 0:28:49I bet the polar bear never did it again, whatever it was.
0:28:49 > 0:28:51That was a lesson learned for that polar bear.
0:28:51 > 0:28:54That's how he got banned from London Zoo.
0:28:55 > 0:28:58I'm going to say it anyway. I remember him telling me,
0:28:58 > 0:29:01"Never camp below the French. They shit on you from a great height."
0:29:05 > 0:29:10- Basically.- You think it's real? - So, anyway, it should be real.
0:29:10 > 0:29:13He is a mountaineer, he knows Chris Bonington very well,
0:29:13 > 0:29:15I'm sure that's real.
0:29:15 > 0:29:17- Is it real?- It's not real.
0:29:19 > 0:29:20Why not?!
0:29:23 > 0:29:25Apparently, it was a deleted scene
0:29:25 > 0:29:28from the first series of I'm Alan Partridge.
0:29:28 > 0:29:29- Another one, please.- OK.
0:29:29 > 0:29:34Millennium Barn Dance hosted by Jet from Gladiators.
0:29:40 > 0:29:45If that's real, it would have been on BBC Two.
0:29:45 > 0:29:47Therefore BBC Two should be closed down.
0:29:47 > 0:29:50What do you think? It cannot...
0:29:50 > 0:29:54Didn't Partridge have a thing for Jet from Gladiators?
0:29:54 > 0:29:59- That was his fancy, wasn't it? - Millennium Barn Dance?
0:30:00 > 0:30:03Hosted by Jet! Surely not.
0:30:03 > 0:30:05How could we have missed it?
0:30:05 > 0:30:09I'm making the move to Channel 4 if that's real.
0:30:09 > 0:30:15- You think Partridge?- It has to be. Otherwise I'm...- You're gone?- Yes.
0:30:15 > 0:30:18- Is it Partridge or real? - You can stay. It's Partridge.
0:30:23 > 0:30:24Try another one.
0:30:24 > 0:30:29Mainly For Men, featuring sharks, cars and lovely ladies.
0:30:30 > 0:30:34- Partridge or real BBC Two?- That's the whole Channel 5, isn't it?
0:30:36 > 0:30:39- Who would present that? - Jeremy Clarkson?
0:30:40 > 0:30:44I worry... I think that could be real.
0:30:44 > 0:30:47I think I've got more faith in BBC Two
0:30:47 > 0:30:50as the fine institution it is, really.
0:30:50 > 0:30:52What are you going to go?
0:30:52 > 0:30:54- I think Partridge.- OK.
0:30:54 > 0:30:58I think that might be real. What do you think? Casting vote.
0:30:59 > 0:31:01I go Partridge.
0:31:01 > 0:31:04- Was it Partridge or was it real? - That was real.
0:31:04 > 0:31:06GASPS OF SURPRISE
0:31:06 > 0:31:08Now I'M leaving BBC Two.
0:31:11 > 0:31:14Yes, a genuine BBC Two programme,
0:31:14 > 0:31:17a 1969 pilot that somehow never made it to air.
0:31:17 > 0:31:20But we do have a section of it now.
0:31:20 > 0:31:22We join it in the middle of a musical number.
0:31:22 > 0:31:23# I want to find a man
0:31:24 > 0:31:26# Who'll take me as I am
0:31:27 > 0:31:29# I've got to find a man
0:31:30 > 0:31:38# Who loves me as I am. #
0:31:42 > 0:31:44And very nice too. It's the only way to do the dusting,
0:31:44 > 0:31:47I can tell you that. Now then, these days,
0:31:47 > 0:31:50we're finding ourselves with much more leisure time on our hands.
0:31:50 > 0:31:52What to do with it all? Well, there are lots of things we can do.
0:31:52 > 0:31:56One thing is the increasingly popular sport of shark fishing.
0:31:56 > 0:31:59LAUGHTER
0:32:04 > 0:32:07They had a little section on polar bear punching straight after that.
0:32:07 > 0:32:09And just for the treat,
0:32:09 > 0:32:12let's remind ourselves of Alan's favourite pitching scene.
0:32:12 > 0:32:14This is from I'm Alan Partridge in 1997.
0:32:14 > 0:32:15Cooking In Prison.
0:32:19 > 0:32:23- A Partridge Amongst The Pigeons. - What's that?- It's just a title.
0:32:25 > 0:32:26Opening sequence -
0:32:26 > 0:32:31me in Trafalgar Square feeding the pigeons and going, "Oh, God!"
0:32:31 > 0:32:33No, I'm sorry, no, stop.
0:32:33 > 0:32:36Youth Hostelling With Chris Eubank.
0:32:36 > 0:32:37No.
0:32:43 > 0:32:44Monkey Tennis?
0:32:47 > 0:32:49That is the end of Partridge Or Programme.
0:32:49 > 0:32:52Before we go back to the board for our next game,
0:32:52 > 0:32:55let's have a huge round of applause for Rebecca Front.
0:33:01 > 0:33:06Joining me next, the man many call the architect of BBC Two,
0:33:06 > 0:33:09was controller of the channel from 1965 to 1968.
0:33:09 > 0:33:11He set the tone for the fledgling network
0:33:11 > 0:33:14before bringing the natural world to its screens.
0:33:14 > 0:33:15Let's have a look at him in action.
0:33:19 > 0:33:22MUSIC: "Circle of Life" from The Lion King
0:33:23 > 0:33:25This little creature is a lizard.
0:33:26 > 0:33:27SQUEAKING
0:33:29 > 0:33:30A bat detector.
0:33:36 > 0:33:39Sweet potatoes. Sweet potatoes.
0:33:44 > 0:33:46Those are howler monkeys up there.
0:33:57 > 0:34:02- Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Sir David Attenborough.- Thank you.
0:34:03 > 0:34:07- Thank you very much.- Now then...
0:34:10 > 0:34:13Before we get started on the round itself,
0:34:13 > 0:34:15explain to us who these people are.
0:34:15 > 0:34:20- This is something to do with your history on the channel.- Ah!
0:34:20 > 0:34:23The only animals from which you recoil violently...
0:34:23 > 0:34:29I regret to say that this is Hullabaloo and this is Custard.
0:34:29 > 0:34:36This ghastly pair were BBC Two's first mascot, emblems,
0:34:36 > 0:34:39publicity things.
0:34:39 > 0:34:41Why? Why two kangaroos?
0:34:41 > 0:34:45The network was 11 months old at the time and I said,
0:34:45 > 0:34:48"If I'm to take it over, Hullabaloo
0:34:48 > 0:34:50"and Custard can go right over there
0:34:50 > 0:34:53"and never be seen again." I got rid of them.
0:34:53 > 0:34:56- You got rid of the corporately created mascots.- I did.
0:34:56 > 0:34:59Good for you, well done. Yes, brilliant
0:35:01 > 0:35:06- You spent...three, four years as channel controller.- Four.
0:35:06 > 0:35:08Four years channel controller,
0:35:08 > 0:35:10essentially, creating a nascent network.
0:35:10 > 0:35:13You were the controller of a brand-new network
0:35:13 > 0:35:15and you could prescribe the vision.
0:35:15 > 0:35:17Exactly. It was a joy, a dream.
0:35:17 > 0:35:20Marvellous. Suddenly to be given this whole network
0:35:20 > 0:35:25and we decided that what we would do would be to do programmes that
0:35:25 > 0:35:29no other network in this country, or indeed anywhere else, had ever done.
0:35:29 > 0:35:32So that you would know that, if you turned it on, there it was,
0:35:32 > 0:35:34it was a very different programme.
0:35:34 > 0:35:38That applied to sport, it applied to documentaries,
0:35:38 > 0:35:39it applied to drama, everything.
0:35:39 > 0:35:41Everything was completely new.
0:35:41 > 0:35:45Sir David has kindly allowed us to turn some key moments of his life
0:35:45 > 0:35:47into a short game that both of you can play.
0:35:47 > 0:35:49We'll be showing a small section of a photograph,
0:35:49 > 0:35:51it will be fingers on buzzers
0:35:51 > 0:35:55to identify what creature from the natural world we are looking at.
0:35:55 > 0:35:58Buzz in as soon as you think you know what animal this is.
0:36:03 > 0:36:04BELL
0:36:04 > 0:36:06Brian's team.
0:36:06 > 0:36:09- Was it a gorilla?- It is, of course, a gorilla.
0:36:09 > 0:36:11APPLAUSE
0:36:13 > 0:36:15- A mountain gorilla?- Yes.- From...
0:36:15 > 0:36:18- From what country?- Rwanda.
0:36:18 > 0:36:21Now, this is a sequence you filmed in 1979,
0:36:21 > 0:36:24possibly the most famous moment in natural history programming.
0:36:24 > 0:36:25Let's have another look at it.
0:36:25 > 0:36:28The gorilla family spends its day gently grazing
0:36:28 > 0:36:30and there's plenty of time for play.
0:36:36 > 0:36:40Sometimes, they even allow others to join in.
0:37:07 > 0:37:11- APPLAUSE AND LAUGHTER - Wonderful!
0:37:14 > 0:37:15If this doesn't sound ridiculous,
0:37:15 > 0:37:19it made us appreciate the animals more because, to a certain extent,
0:37:19 > 0:37:21we saw the humanity, the shared traits
0:37:21 > 0:37:23between ourselves and the great apes.
0:37:23 > 0:37:25Was it frightening, by the way?
0:37:25 > 0:37:29- Was there any danger?- I wasn't intending to get that close.
0:37:30 > 0:37:33- Why would I? - One thing led to another.
0:37:36 > 0:37:39- She was just a friend.- Oh, stop.
0:37:39 > 0:37:45I had to explain a technical thing about thumb and forefingers
0:37:45 > 0:37:49and evolution and the gorillas were supposed to be a long way away,
0:37:49 > 0:37:52about ten yards away. And there was a group ten yards away.
0:37:52 > 0:37:56I crawled up towards them and turned to speak to camera,
0:37:56 > 0:37:58and while I was actually speaking to camera,
0:37:58 > 0:38:02thinking that the gorillas were behind me,
0:38:02 > 0:38:05I felt a huge weight on my head. And it was...
0:38:05 > 0:38:06I turned round
0:38:06 > 0:38:10and it was this female gorilla had her hand on top of my head.
0:38:10 > 0:38:14And she put her finger in my mouth and looked inside my mouth.
0:38:14 > 0:38:18And I just sort of lay back there...
0:38:18 > 0:38:21and then two baby gorillas came and sat on my feet.
0:38:21 > 0:38:23And it was just bliss.
0:38:23 > 0:38:27It was really kind of paradise. Just amazing.
0:38:27 > 0:38:29What amazes me is the shot is so steady
0:38:29 > 0:38:32given the cameraman is backing away.
0:38:36 > 0:38:39But did the Rwandan government try to stop you taking the tapes out?
0:38:39 > 0:38:43Yes, they did. They, er, when we eventually came down,
0:38:43 > 0:38:45we were going back in the track of a lorry
0:38:45 > 0:38:48and I heard what you hear in Western movies, you know...
0:38:48 > 0:38:51WHANG! All that sort of thing. And it's a bullet!
0:38:51 > 0:38:53And I thought, "That's funny! What's going on there?"
0:38:53 > 0:38:56- LAUGHTER - And when we came round the corner,
0:38:56 > 0:39:00there was a roadblock and we were held up and strip-searched
0:39:00 > 0:39:03and one thing and another, because they were thinking that
0:39:03 > 0:39:05we were spreading revolutionary ideas or something.
0:39:05 > 0:39:07And you eventually smuggled the footage out?
0:39:07 > 0:39:11The cameraman, Martin Saunders, had the wit, while we were held up,
0:39:11 > 0:39:15to change labels on the cans of the film, cos it was film in those days,
0:39:15 > 0:39:18and he put "unused" labels on the actual film
0:39:18 > 0:39:21- and "used" labels on film that we hadn't exposed...- Wow.
0:39:21 > 0:39:25..and when the military men said, "We're impounding the film,"
0:39:25 > 0:39:29- he gave them this film which was actually unexposed.- Wow.
0:39:29 > 0:39:31- So there, so we got it through. - Astonishing! Jeez.
0:39:31 > 0:39:33APPLAUSE
0:39:35 > 0:39:38David, what is the situation like now in Rwanda
0:39:38 > 0:39:41- for those mountain gorillas? - As a result of that,
0:39:41 > 0:39:45we set up a few charities, um, and set up an organisation
0:39:45 > 0:39:48to train mountain gorillas to habituate,
0:39:48 > 0:39:50so that people could come and see them
0:39:50 > 0:39:54and so now they're a major element in the economy of Rwanda
0:39:54 > 0:39:56and there are more mountain gorillas now alive in Rwanda
0:39:56 > 0:39:59- than there were when we were there.- Amazing.
0:39:59 > 0:40:00APPLAUSE
0:40:06 > 0:40:09OK, teams, one more question. Fingers on buzzers.
0:40:09 > 0:40:13Tell me what creature we're looking at this time.
0:40:15 > 0:40:16LAUGHTER
0:40:16 > 0:40:18BUZZER
0:40:18 > 0:40:20I think that was Hugh Dennis' team in first.
0:40:20 > 0:40:23It seems like, um, like Homo sapiens?
0:40:23 > 0:40:25I'm going to have to narrow it down more than that, I'm afraid.
0:40:25 > 0:40:28- It might be Sir David Attenborough. - You're absolutely right.
0:40:28 > 0:40:30Let's have a look.
0:40:30 > 0:40:31APPLAUSE
0:40:31 > 0:40:34AUDIENCE WHOOPS
0:40:34 > 0:40:35Yes!
0:40:36 > 0:40:38It IS Sir David himself.
0:40:38 > 0:40:42Let's have a look at this moment from the show Tribal Eye.
0:40:42 > 0:40:45'But a stranger might only go into this house of memories
0:40:45 > 0:40:48'if he showed proper reverence to the ancient gods
0:40:48 > 0:40:51'and discarded his alien Western clothes
0:40:51 > 0:40:53'and, like everybody else in the settlement,
0:40:53 > 0:40:55'wore only custom clothes.'
0:40:59 > 0:41:00APPLAUSE
0:41:04 > 0:41:07That is the Makaruka tribe, I believe?
0:41:07 > 0:41:09- Yes.- Makaruka tribe, who are famous for their love
0:41:09 > 0:41:12of playing practical jokes on unsuspecting visitors...
0:41:12 > 0:41:14LAUGHTER
0:41:15 > 0:41:18..like suddenly deciding they have to be stripped naked.
0:41:18 > 0:41:21- Their demand was... Not just you, of course?- No, all of us. All of us.
0:41:21 > 0:41:24Cameraman, everybody.
0:41:24 > 0:41:28- That's the crew there? - They were a revolutionary group
0:41:28 > 0:41:31who wanted to discard everything that was European,
0:41:31 > 0:41:35- including your clothes.- Yes.- They made an exception for the camera,
0:41:35 > 0:41:36but that was all.
0:41:36 > 0:41:38And I can tell you, bark cloth...
0:41:38 > 0:41:39DARA LAUGHS
0:41:39 > 0:41:43They dripped... They put it in seawater to start with
0:41:43 > 0:41:47and then, they wrap it round you, and that's cold,
0:41:47 > 0:41:48but it shrinks.
0:41:48 > 0:41:50LAUGHTER AND GROANING
0:41:50 > 0:41:52- Ooh, yes!- Anyway, there you are.
0:41:54 > 0:41:57- The things you do for the corporation.- Yes!
0:41:57 > 0:41:59You've suffered for your art there.
0:41:59 > 0:42:01APPLAUSE
0:42:05 > 0:42:06It's been an astonishing career
0:42:06 > 0:42:08that you've had with the BBC for the last 50 years.
0:42:08 > 0:42:10Ladies and gentlemen, Sir David Attenborough.
0:42:10 > 0:42:12- CHEERING - Thank you very much.
0:42:17 > 0:42:19Thank you very much.
0:42:21 > 0:42:24Before we get to the end of this section, I want to show you one more
0:42:24 > 0:42:27clip which is a clip of the very first news broadcasts on BBC Two.
0:42:27 > 0:42:30Genuinely interesting to watch, firstly for the news that's on it,
0:42:30 > 0:42:33but secondly, for how they present the news, which is very different
0:42:33 > 0:42:35to the way we do it today. Take a look at this.
0:42:35 > 0:42:37Well, among other things, it's been the naming day
0:42:37 > 0:42:41for the Queen's fourth baby, Prince Edward Antony Richard Louis.
0:42:41 > 0:42:46No special significance, I suppose, but the initials E-A-R-L spell earl.
0:42:46 > 0:42:48- STUDIO AUDIENCE LAUGHS - In South Africa,
0:42:48 > 0:42:50the African nationalist leader, Nelson Mandela,
0:42:50 > 0:42:55has admitted in open court to planning sabotage against apartheid.
0:42:55 > 0:42:58The Church of Scotland is recommended to stand firm
0:42:58 > 0:43:02against commercial sport on Sunday. A committee report is not against
0:43:02 > 0:43:05taking exercise on Sunday, but it does recommend
0:43:05 > 0:43:09serious thought and reading as proper activities for that day.
0:43:09 > 0:43:10LAUGHTER CONTINUES
0:43:10 > 0:43:13Well, that is all for the moment. I think.
0:43:13 > 0:43:15Anything else?
0:43:15 > 0:43:18- HUGE LAUGHTER - That's all we have for the moment.
0:43:18 > 0:43:21But we will be keeping in touch.
0:43:22 > 0:43:23APPLAUSE
0:43:27 > 0:43:30Well, that is the end of our ground-breakers round here
0:43:30 > 0:43:33on All About Two. I can tell you that, in second place at the moment,
0:43:33 > 0:43:34it's Brian's team with six points.
0:43:34 > 0:43:37In the lead, it's Hugh's team with seven points.
0:43:37 > 0:43:39APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:43:46 > 0:43:48For the second part of All About Two,
0:43:48 > 0:43:50we move to the Channel's roster of stars
0:43:50 > 0:43:53and the one-off cameos we'd forgotten we'd even remembered.
0:43:53 > 0:43:55This round is all about faces.
0:43:55 > 0:43:58Good evening, I'm Michael Moore, and this is TV Nation.
0:43:58 > 0:44:01Good evening and welcome, at last, to Newsnight.
0:44:01 > 0:44:02BOTH: We're the hairy bikers!
0:44:02 > 0:44:05So we're all set to enjoy ourselves tonight.
0:44:05 > 0:44:08We hope you'll join us and enjoy yourselves too.
0:44:08 > 0:44:10# You're like my best friend with extras
0:44:10 > 0:44:12# Sure I might've been testing you, mister
0:44:12 > 0:44:17# I want more, I'm at your door
0:44:17 > 0:44:19# And you're broke You hate it when I smoke
0:44:19 > 0:44:22# So maybe you're not wealthy but you keep me healthy
0:44:22 > 0:44:24# Say no more
0:44:24 > 0:44:27# I'm all yours
0:44:27 > 0:44:32# And you put that rich boy in his place... #
0:44:32 > 0:44:35I ain't happy with any explanations from the three of you!
0:44:35 > 0:44:39# So take one step closer to me
0:44:39 > 0:44:43# And do you feel my heart skips over the beat?
0:44:43 > 0:44:47# You're dancing too And I'm not hiding
0:44:47 > 0:44:51# You can find me singing on the roof... #
0:44:51 > 0:44:53Ready, steady...cook!
0:44:53 > 0:44:55# It's all about you... #
0:44:55 > 0:44:57It's out of this world.
0:44:57 > 0:44:59She only cooks things with plums in,
0:44:59 > 0:45:01so she can look at the camera and go...
0:45:01 > 0:45:03- SULTRY VOICE:- Plums! - LAUGHTER
0:45:03 > 0:45:06Dieting makes you fat.
0:45:06 > 0:45:08Whenever there is stink, there is illness.
0:45:08 > 0:45:11- I just want to go... Agh! - LAUGHTER
0:45:11 > 0:45:14# Singing it's all about you... #
0:45:14 > 0:45:16What makes us human?
0:45:16 > 0:45:19# Because it's all about you... #
0:45:19 > 0:45:21I'm out.
0:45:21 > 0:45:23# So join me on the road... #
0:45:23 > 0:45:26So this is a personal memoir.
0:45:26 > 0:45:28# It's all about you
0:45:30 > 0:45:33# Because it's all about you. #
0:45:34 > 0:45:36APPLAUSE
0:45:41 > 0:45:44Let's have our faces board, please.
0:45:44 > 0:45:45Once again, we have a board of pictures
0:45:45 > 0:45:48and there's a game behind each one. Let's have a look at the first one.
0:46:02 > 0:46:05That was The Fast Show. As a tribute to the seminal '90s sketch show,
0:46:05 > 0:46:08we've cut together a whole host of comedy characters
0:46:08 > 0:46:11from a range of BBC Two shows into a mini Fast Show.
0:46:11 > 0:46:13Hugh's team, this round is for you.
0:46:13 > 0:46:16Watch closely, because afterwards, you will be against the clock
0:46:16 > 0:46:19to name as many of the characters - not the actors, but the characters -
0:46:19 > 0:46:21from this montage as you possibly can.
0:46:21 > 0:46:23- Sort of like The Generation Game? - In many ways, yes.
0:46:23 > 0:46:25- LAUGHTER - Yes, yes.- Haven't got pen and paper.
0:46:25 > 0:46:28- No, you have to keep it in your head.- OK, that's fine.
0:46:28 > 0:46:32We could give you a digital camera to take photographs then scan them.
0:46:32 > 0:46:34- LAUGHTER - Yes.- Yeah.
0:46:34 > 0:46:37- I'll just give you the list, if you want(!)- That's great!- Much easier!
0:46:37 > 0:46:40So we want you to name as many of these comedy characters as you can.
0:46:40 > 0:46:42Not the actors, just the characters.
0:46:42 > 0:46:45Obviously, you'll try this at home, so let's have a look at the montage.
0:46:45 > 0:46:49This week, I have been mostly eating taramasalata.
0:46:49 > 0:46:52This is my shiny thing!
0:46:52 > 0:46:54One pair's enough for her ears,
0:46:54 > 0:46:56but what about her theres and her everywheres?
0:46:56 > 0:46:58The only label she wears is "drip dry".
0:46:58 > 0:47:01You're my wife now!
0:47:01 > 0:47:04- Come on, then, give us a smile! That's it!- Agh!
0:47:04 > 0:47:06"Do not lean out of the window."
0:47:06 > 0:47:08You've just told a little porky pie, haven't you?
0:47:08 > 0:47:10..teaching ravens to fly underwater.
0:47:10 > 0:47:13- Why don't you let me map read? - No, they've got to learn!
0:47:13 > 0:47:15Government policy is nothing to do with common sense.
0:47:18 > 0:47:19HACKING AND COUGHING
0:47:19 > 0:47:20GLASS SMASHES
0:47:20 > 0:47:22Charlie tells me you're an actress.
0:47:22 > 0:47:24Wild? I was absolutely livid!
0:47:24 > 0:47:26This calls for a cup of my delicious home-made coffee!
0:47:26 > 0:47:28If you can't lick 'em, join 'em!
0:47:28 > 0:47:30Quite phenomenal!
0:47:31 > 0:47:33- GARETH: Smashie and Nicey. - OK, grand.
0:47:33 > 0:47:36So, against the clock now, but who did you recognise there?
0:47:36 > 0:47:41- OK, Smashie and Nicey.- Very good. - Mrs Overall.- Tim Nice But Dim.
0:47:41 > 0:47:43- Um, Pauline Calf.- Yes.
0:47:43 > 0:47:45- Er...- Patsy. - BOTH: Patsy!
0:47:45 > 0:47:48- Patsy.- Er... I can't remember...
0:47:48 > 0:47:52- what the...- The guy, "Today, I will mostly be wearing..."- Yeah, thingy?
0:47:52 > 0:47:55- Mr "I will mostly be wearing taramasalata..."- No!
0:47:55 > 0:47:57- There was him.- Um...
0:47:57 > 0:48:00- I can't remember...- The guy from Red Dwarf, what was his name?
0:48:00 > 0:48:01- Oh, the Cat!- From Red Dwarf.- Cat.
0:48:01 > 0:48:05- Arkwright from, er, Open All Hours.- Yes.
0:48:05 > 0:48:07Er...
0:48:07 > 0:48:09Oh, er, the two, um...
0:48:09 > 0:48:11OK, ten more seconds.
0:48:11 > 0:48:13Um... Oh, what are they called?
0:48:13 > 0:48:15Comedy characters(!)
0:48:15 > 0:48:17LAUGHTER
0:48:17 > 0:48:18All of them. I can't remember any.
0:48:18 > 0:48:20You see, we should've had a bit of pen and paper.
0:48:20 > 0:48:22KLAXON
0:48:22 > 0:48:24OK, that was relatively poor.
0:48:24 > 0:48:27In order, we'll see how well you did on that one.
0:48:27 > 0:48:30The character from The Fast Show played by Mark Williams is Jesse.
0:48:30 > 0:48:32- Ah!- OK, yes.- Jesse's Diets.
0:48:32 > 0:48:35- Red Dwarf's the Cat, played by Danny John Jules.- We got that.
0:48:35 > 0:48:38- Albert E Arkwright, played by Ronnie Barker, Open All Hours.- Yeah.
0:48:38 > 0:48:40Joanna Lumley as Patsy in Absolutely Fabulous. You got that.
0:48:40 > 0:48:43Papa Lazarou from the League Of Gentlemen, which you did not get...
0:48:43 > 0:48:45- We didn't get. - ..played by Reece Shearsmith.
0:48:45 > 0:48:49- Prunella Scales as Sybil Fawlty. - OK. We can't remember seeing that.
0:48:49 > 0:48:53Vyvyan Basterd, played by Ade Edmondson in The Young Ones.
0:48:53 > 0:48:56- Steve Coogan as Pauline Calf. - We got that.- You got that.
0:48:56 > 0:48:59- Peter Cook as Sir Arthur Streeb-Greebling!- Oh!
0:48:59 > 0:49:01No, it was Arthur Greeb-Streebling.
0:49:01 > 0:49:04No, it was Arthur Streeb-Greebling, but you can keep telling me that.
0:49:04 > 0:49:06LAUGHTER
0:49:06 > 0:49:09Simon Day was the Competitive Dad in The Fast Show.
0:49:09 > 0:49:12- Sir Humphrey Appleby.- Yeah.
0:49:12 > 0:49:14- Tim from The Office, played by Martin Freeman.- Oh, yes!
0:49:14 > 0:49:18The Fast Show's Bob Fleming, played by Charlie Higson.
0:49:18 > 0:49:21- Harry Enfield's Tim Nice But Dim. - Got that!- Yeah.- Yeah.
0:49:21 > 0:49:22Name of the gorilla?
0:49:22 > 0:49:24- Er...- Gerald the gorilla.
0:49:24 > 0:49:27- And Julie Walters as... - Mrs Overall.- Mrs Overall.
0:49:27 > 0:49:29James Bolam played what character?
0:49:29 > 0:49:32- He played Terry Collier. - He did indeed play Terry Collier.
0:49:32 > 0:49:34You should've said that the first time(!)
0:49:34 > 0:49:35- LAUGHTER - And...
0:49:35 > 0:49:39- Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse as...- ALL: Smashie and Nicey!
0:49:39 > 0:49:43- I think we did quite well. - You got seven out of a possible 18.
0:49:43 > 0:49:45LAUGHTER
0:49:45 > 0:49:47To be fair, I think that's an A at GCSE.
0:49:47 > 0:49:49LAUGHTER
0:49:49 > 0:49:51APPLAUSE
0:49:54 > 0:49:56I'll give you a chance to get one bonus point.
0:49:56 > 0:49:58In the picture of Tim from The Office, that's Tim Canterbury,
0:49:58 > 0:50:00if we take a look at that for a minute.
0:50:00 > 0:50:02Who is that in the background?
0:50:02 > 0:50:04Can you tell me? Who's playing the caretaker?
0:50:04 > 0:50:06Someone connected with the show.
0:50:06 > 0:50:08- With THIS show? - No.- Not with this show.
0:50:08 > 0:50:11Well, he's connected with that show, cos he's in it!
0:50:11 > 0:50:12LAUGHTER
0:50:15 > 0:50:17That's Stephen Merchant's father.
0:50:17 > 0:50:19- Yes, it is! - Is the correct answer.
0:50:19 > 0:50:20- DEBORAH:- Well done!
0:50:20 > 0:50:22- APPLAUSE - Did you know that?
0:50:22 > 0:50:23Or was that a good guess?
0:50:23 > 0:50:25APPLAUSE DROWNS OUT SPEECH
0:50:25 > 0:50:28A bonus point for that. Well done. Two points for Hugh's team there.
0:50:28 > 0:50:30CHEERING
0:50:34 > 0:50:36OK, let's take a look at our next game.
0:50:37 > 0:50:40Never Mind The Buzzcocks. Brian's team, as a tribute to the show,
0:50:40 > 0:50:44you'll play our very own version of the Buzzcocks identity parade.
0:50:44 > 0:50:46This time, however, everyone in this line-up is
0:50:46 > 0:50:49a significant figure from BBC Two's past
0:50:49 > 0:50:53and it's up to you and your team to identify which one is which.
0:50:53 > 0:50:55Now, this is your line-up of BBC Two faces.
0:50:55 > 0:50:57In no particular order,
0:50:57 > 0:51:01it consists of the first female winner of One Man And His Dog,
0:51:01 > 0:51:04the incorrectly titled One Man And His Dog!
0:51:04 > 0:51:05LAUGHTER
0:51:05 > 0:51:09Lord Sugar's personal assistant from the first series of The Apprentice.
0:51:09 > 0:51:12- Laa-Laa from the Teletubbies. - LAUGHTER
0:51:12 > 0:51:16The first woman to referee a World Snooker Championship Final.
0:51:16 > 0:51:20And, from Twin Peaks, the Log Lady.
0:51:20 > 0:51:22So which one is which?
0:51:22 > 0:51:27Well, I'm dreading accusing someone of being a Teletubby.
0:51:27 > 0:51:28LAUGHTER
0:51:28 > 0:51:30It's a very technical job, being a Teletubby.
0:51:30 > 0:51:34- They would have to be quite small. - And physical.- Would they not?
0:51:34 > 0:51:36Laa-Laa wasn't the little one. That was Po!
0:51:36 > 0:51:37LAUGHTER
0:51:40 > 0:51:45I'm pretty sure. Can I just jump and say I recognise lovely lady Number 5
0:51:45 > 0:51:49- as Log Lady from Twin Peaks. - Do you think? Wow!
0:51:49 > 0:51:51How much of a Twin Peaks fan were you?
0:51:51 > 0:51:55And I'm going to go for Number 1 for the Teletubby.
0:51:55 > 0:51:59And I apologise profusely if that's incorrect.
0:51:59 > 0:52:01- I agree. It's Number 1.- It's not that you look like a Teletubby.
0:52:01 > 0:52:04You look athletic enough to play a Teletubby,
0:52:04 > 0:52:06- because there's lots of dancing involved.- Yeah!
0:52:06 > 0:52:10- I met the Teletubbies once in Singapore.- Did you?- Yeah.
0:52:10 > 0:52:14- Yeah, and they are very physical and fit.- In or out of costume?- Both!
0:52:14 > 0:52:16- But I... - LAUGHTER
0:52:16 > 0:52:19This just seems like one of those Singapore stories, Dave,
0:52:19 > 0:52:21- that should never be heard. - LAUGHTER
0:52:21 > 0:52:24- You know?!- It's actually... - "The merchant navy pulls in.
0:52:24 > 0:52:26"I've got two days on shore. I don't know what happened,
0:52:26 > 0:52:29"but the Teletubbies appeared at some stage in the middle of it."
0:52:29 > 0:52:31- True. It's true.- Yeah.
0:52:31 > 0:52:34- So we've got the Log Lady and the Teletubby?- Yes, we've got 1 and 5.
0:52:34 > 0:52:39So we've got... We're looking for shepherd, PA and snooker ref.
0:52:39 > 0:52:40- Yeah.- Er...
0:52:40 > 0:52:41MEERA SIGHS
0:52:41 > 0:52:43Well, I think...
0:52:43 > 0:52:47Who looks like they might... look after sheep?
0:52:47 > 0:52:49LAUGHTER
0:52:49 > 0:52:51Number 2, you've got a woolly scarf.
0:52:53 > 0:52:54LAUGHTER
0:52:56 > 0:53:00- May or may not imply that...- That is a fantastic piece of deduction!
0:53:00 > 0:53:03HUGH: It's only me, but I'm wondering if it might help if they whistled?
0:53:03 > 0:53:05LAUGHTER
0:53:06 > 0:53:08APPLAUSE
0:53:12 > 0:53:15Would it be really crass to go on footwear?
0:53:15 > 0:53:18- No, no...- Because I'm just thinking Number 4's footwear...
0:53:18 > 0:53:21- We're clutching at straws!- ..would be much better off in rough terrain.
0:53:23 > 0:53:26- So you think those are s shepherd's footwear?- I think...
0:53:26 > 0:53:29I think, if I was an outdoor girl, those are the kind of shoes I'd wear.
0:53:29 > 0:53:32Yeah, but she's not actually outdoors at the moment!
0:53:32 > 0:53:36I'm sure she owns another pair of shoes for other situations!
0:53:36 > 0:53:38Number 3, she looks very, very efficient.
0:53:40 > 0:53:43- Yes!- The person that could be Lord Sugar's PA.
0:53:43 > 0:53:45To focus, you're looking for a shepherdess,
0:53:45 > 0:53:47you're looking for a snooker referee
0:53:47 > 0:53:48and you're looking for Sir Alan's PA.
0:53:48 > 0:53:52I think we've gone for shepherdess based entirely on the footwear.
0:53:52 > 0:53:54LAUGHTER
0:53:54 > 0:53:583 - PA, based on... What based on?
0:53:58 > 0:54:01- Efficiency and... - Efficiency and appearance,
0:54:01 > 0:54:03which, by the process of elimination,
0:54:03 > 0:54:07- means the snooker ref is Number 2.- Number 2.
0:54:07 > 0:54:09I bet we are totally wrong!
0:54:09 > 0:54:13So we're Teletubby, snooker ref, PA, shepherd and Twin Peaks.
0:54:13 > 0:54:16OK, fine, well, we can go along the line.
0:54:16 > 0:54:18Number 1, who you are saying is a Teletubby,
0:54:18 > 0:54:20could you identify yourself, please?
0:54:20 > 0:54:23I am Nikky Smedley and I played Laa-Laa in Teletubbies.
0:54:23 > 0:54:25MEERA: Yeah!
0:54:25 > 0:54:26APPLAUSE
0:54:31 > 0:54:35Naughty Noo-Noo! Sorry, I couldn't help myself!
0:54:35 > 0:54:38Would that fit in with your memory of your night in Singapore?
0:54:38 > 0:54:40LAUGHTER
0:54:40 > 0:54:42LAUGHTER CONTINUES
0:54:42 > 0:54:44# Laa-laa! #
0:54:44 > 0:54:47- I don't know! - We don't want to know!
0:54:47 > 0:54:50Er, Number 2 you said was the first woman to referee
0:54:50 > 0:54:53a World Championship Snooker Final. Could you identify yourself, please?
0:54:53 > 0:54:58I'm Katy Cropper and I was the first woman to win One Man And His Dog.
0:54:58 > 0:55:00Aw!
0:55:00 > 0:55:01APPLAUSE
0:55:04 > 0:55:07Number 3 you identified as Sir Alan's PA in
0:55:07 > 0:55:10the first series of The Apprentice. Could you identify yourself?
0:55:10 > 0:55:14My name is Michaela Tabb and I am a professional snooker referee.
0:55:14 > 0:55:16- Oh! - APPLAUSE
0:55:21 > 0:55:23Number 4 you said was
0:55:23 > 0:55:26the first shepherdess to win One Man And His Dog.
0:55:26 > 0:55:27My name's Sonia Copy
0:55:27 > 0:55:31and I was Sir Alan Sugar's PA in the first series of The Apprentice.
0:55:31 > 0:55:32APPLAUSE
0:55:37 > 0:55:40However, you've probably worked this one out.
0:55:40 > 0:55:43Er, you said that the last was the Log Lady on Twin Peaks.
0:55:43 > 0:55:46- Could you identify yourself, please? - Yes, I'm Catherine E Coulson
0:55:46 > 0:55:49and I played the Log Lady on Twin Peaks.
0:55:49 > 0:55:52I actually have a little log here with me.
0:55:52 > 0:55:54LAUGHTER
0:55:54 > 0:55:56At all times!
0:55:56 > 0:55:57APPLAUSE
0:56:02 > 0:56:04You got two of the five right.
0:56:04 > 0:56:06I'm going to give Brian's team two points for that.
0:56:06 > 0:56:07APPLAUSE
0:56:12 > 0:56:14And, just for our own sense of closure,
0:56:14 > 0:56:17let's have a look at all of our line-up in action.
0:56:17 > 0:56:19- # Tinky Winky!- Tinky Winky!
0:56:19 > 0:56:21- # Dipsy!- Dipsy!
0:56:21 > 0:56:23- # Laa-laa!- Laa-Laa!
0:56:23 > 0:56:24- # Po!- Po! #
0:56:24 > 0:56:26They're in, they're in there.
0:56:26 > 0:56:30Oh, well done, lass. Well done, lass. Of course, that wins it.
0:56:39 > 0:56:4034.
0:56:41 > 0:56:43TELEPHONE RINGS
0:56:43 > 0:56:46You can go through to the boardroom now.
0:56:54 > 0:56:58We don't know what will happen or when.
0:56:58 > 0:57:01But there are owls in the roadhouse.
0:57:03 > 0:57:05STUDIO AUDIENCE LAUGHS
0:57:07 > 0:57:08APPLAUSE
0:57:12 > 0:57:14Catherine, please tell me
0:57:14 > 0:57:17that you didn't fly that piece of log over specially for this?
0:57:17 > 0:57:22I wasn't allowed to bring the real log, because American security,
0:57:22 > 0:57:25the airline told me that it could be used as a bludgeon.
0:57:25 > 0:57:27LAUGHTER
0:57:27 > 0:57:30- Of course, I would never use the log as a bludgeon.- Of course not!
0:57:30 > 0:57:33However, I was able to sneak this in my bra.
0:57:33 > 0:57:34LAUGHTER
0:57:34 > 0:57:37You know, we do have trees here. You could have just picked one up?
0:57:37 > 0:57:41Ladies and gentlemen, a huge round of applause for our line-up!
0:57:41 > 0:57:42APPLAUSE
0:57:46 > 0:57:49- They got a bonus point. Why can't we get a bonus point?- Yeah!
0:57:49 > 0:57:50Cos there was a bonus question!
0:57:50 > 0:57:53- We just happened to have a bonus question.- That's clearly...
0:57:53 > 0:57:55Why is the sky blue? There's your bonus question!
0:57:55 > 0:57:58- Because of Rayleigh scattering. - Right! A bonus point for you!
0:57:58 > 0:58:00- OK, so... - LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:58:05 > 0:58:08Ladies and gentlemen, a round of applause for our line-up!
0:58:08 > 0:58:10APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:58:14 > 0:58:16Right, what's our next round?
0:58:25 > 0:58:28I don't want you ever to worry about lumps.
0:58:28 > 0:58:31Never, ever, ever, they said, work with animals and children.
0:58:32 > 0:58:34It still tastes pukka!
0:58:34 > 0:58:35No way!
0:58:35 > 0:58:37Miaow! Miaow! Feed!
0:58:37 > 0:58:39Absolutely useless!
0:58:39 > 0:58:41Keep your legs together!
0:58:41 > 0:58:44And it's Mrs Godfrey who finally triumphs over her competitors
0:58:44 > 0:58:46to become the Cook Of The Year.
0:58:49 > 0:58:50APPLAUSE
0:58:53 > 0:58:57A - mwah! - delicious smorgasbord of BBC Two chefs there,
0:58:57 > 0:59:00including the channel's very first televised cooking contest from 1964,
0:59:00 > 0:59:04called Cook Of The Year, who won a giant wooden spoon.
0:59:04 > 0:59:06- LAUGHTER - Things have moved on since then,
0:59:06 > 0:59:07partly thanks to our next guest.
0:59:07 > 0:59:09He hosted the longest-running cookery series.
0:59:09 > 0:59:12Welcome the host of Ready Steady Cook - Ainsley Harriott.
0:59:12 > 0:59:13APPLAUSE
0:59:13 > 0:59:15Thank you!
0:59:20 > 0:59:23- How long did it run for?- Er...
0:59:23 > 0:59:26Well, 16 years the show actually ran for.
0:59:26 > 0:59:28I think we nearly did 2,000 programmes.
0:59:28 > 0:59:31I mean, it is bizarre just how huge a part of the channel's output
0:59:31 > 0:59:35have been chefs and what stars it's made. Like, I mean, Dave,
0:59:35 > 0:59:38- you've been cooking on television for some time now.- 10 years, yeah.
0:59:38 > 0:59:42- But you didn't start as a chef, am my right?- No...- You were in showbiz?
0:59:42 > 0:59:44I was a make-up artist.
0:59:44 > 0:59:48I was the first male make-up artist at Television Centre in London.
0:59:48 > 0:59:50And that's going back to 1980.
0:59:50 > 0:59:53And some of the old shows on BBC, you know,
0:59:53 > 0:59:56especially when I was a trainee, and I was staff at the centre, and
0:59:56 > 0:59:59- I can remember sort of cutting my teeth on them, really.- Yeah, yeah.
0:59:59 > 1:00:02- Did you do Dr Who or anything like that?- I did. I did.
1:00:02 > 1:00:03Sil was one of mine.
1:00:03 > 1:00:05A little green man in a...in a bath of slime.
1:00:05 > 1:00:07- I worked on Sil. - LAUGHTER
1:00:07 > 1:00:10Things like The Cleopatras on Two. Remember that series?
1:00:10 > 1:00:13And one of the jobs, the handmaidens were there,
1:00:13 > 1:00:16and there was a lot of nudity in the programme.
1:00:16 > 1:00:19And the nipples were painted gold. And as a young 23-year-old...
1:00:19 > 1:00:20LAUGHTER
1:00:20 > 1:00:22..I was very low down the food chain,
1:00:22 > 1:00:24one of my jobs was to touch the gold up
1:00:24 > 1:00:27as it wore off with the dressing gowns. It was great!
1:00:27 > 1:00:29- Happy days!- Yes!
1:00:29 > 1:00:33OK, Ainsley, for the sake of this game, which is open to both of you,
1:00:33 > 1:00:35we are going to resurrect one of the rounds from the show...
1:00:35 > 1:00:38- Absolutely.- ..which is the Ready Steady Cook quickie bag.
1:00:38 > 1:00:40- What was the principle behind that?- This is it.
1:00:40 > 1:00:43- It was a bag like this, of course.- Yes.
1:00:43 > 1:00:46And, of course, it contained mystery ingredients.
1:00:46 > 1:00:49And, of course, the chefs then were given the challenge to cook
1:00:49 > 1:00:51whatever was in the bag in 20 minutes.
1:00:51 > 1:00:54OK, for this round, it's not a mystery ingredient,
1:00:54 > 1:00:56- we're not getting anyone to cook anything.- No.
1:00:56 > 1:00:58It's the ingredients that would reveal to us
1:00:58 > 1:01:01- the identity of a famous telly chef? - A famous telly chef, yeah.
1:01:01 > 1:01:06- Hugh, your team goes first.- OK, the first item for our teams is...
1:01:08 > 1:01:10This rather slinky little number, yeah.
1:01:10 > 1:01:11LAUGHTER
1:01:11 > 1:01:14- Fanny Cradock?- Fanny Cradock? - Fanny Cradock?- Fanny Cradock?
1:01:14 > 1:01:17- Let's have another item. - Hang on, there's more?- There's more?
1:01:17 > 1:01:23- The Collins English Dictionary. - May I?- Yeah, you certainly may.
1:01:23 > 1:01:25The Collins English Dictionary.
1:01:25 > 1:01:27- Does that change your guess? - Oh, I don't know.
1:01:27 > 1:01:29Who were...? Right, er...
1:01:29 > 1:01:33Is that...? What is that? Is that like a sort of gymslip?
1:01:33 > 1:01:35No, it's from a previous era, but it is a...
1:01:35 > 1:01:38Tell me, tell me, he's not a cook, but it's not Desmond Tutu?
1:01:38 > 1:01:39LAUGHTER
1:01:40 > 1:01:43I'm just hoping it's not Antony Worrall Thompson!
1:01:43 > 1:01:44LAUGHTER
1:01:44 > 1:01:47- A dictionary? Somebody wordy? - A dictionary?
1:01:47 > 1:01:49- Somebody wordy, but who's also got a fine figure.- Words.
1:01:51 > 1:01:54- Delia Smith?- Can we have the third one? Let's have the third one.
1:01:54 > 1:01:55Because it's pretty obvious so far,
1:01:55 > 1:01:58but we're just going for the third just to assure ourselves.
1:01:58 > 1:01:59LAUGHTER
1:01:59 > 1:02:01This could be quite revealing.
1:02:01 > 1:02:04Yes, the album cover of Let It Bleed by The Rolling Stones.
1:02:04 > 1:02:07- GARETH:- With a cake on it! Is it Mary Berry?
1:02:08 > 1:02:10But then, that's cakes?
1:02:10 > 1:02:12Rolling Stones Let It Bleed. OK, so who went out
1:02:12 > 1:02:14- with the Rolling Stones? - Not Fanny Cradock, then.
1:02:14 > 1:02:17- Oh! Oh! Jane Asher! Could it be Jane Asher?- Ooh!
1:02:17 > 1:02:18- AUDIENCE MEMBER: Yes! - Yes! Good call!
1:02:18 > 1:02:21Somebody in the audience said yes, so it must be right.
1:02:21 > 1:02:24- Jane Asher?- Good call!- Hang on! She went out with a Beatles!
1:02:24 > 1:02:25- McCartney!- No...- Paul McCartney.
1:02:25 > 1:02:28- So you wouldn't put a Rolling Stones album! The last thing you'd do!- No!
1:02:28 > 1:02:30- Yeah.- Er...
1:02:30 > 1:02:32Er...er...
1:02:32 > 1:02:36- You've got to pick one.- I don't know anything about Fanny...Cradock.
1:02:36 > 1:02:37Eh?! LAUGHTER
1:02:40 > 1:02:42- Let's say Fanny Cradock. - You're going for Fanny Cradock?
1:02:42 > 1:02:46- We're going for Fanny Cradock. - Well, I'm afraid the answer is...
1:02:46 > 1:02:49- Delia Smith.- Oh.- Ooh!- Richard, can you talk us through this?
1:02:49 > 1:02:51The swimsuit is there, because, if you look at your screens,
1:02:51 > 1:02:54she was briefly, in the 1960s, a model.
1:02:54 > 1:02:57- Let's take a look. There she is. That's Delia.- Delia, yeah.
1:02:57 > 1:02:59I'd say the light wasn't very good for the others, was it?
1:02:59 > 1:03:01LAUGHTER
1:03:03 > 1:03:04What's the dictionary?
1:03:04 > 1:03:08- In 2003, the word "Delia" entered the Collins dictionary...- Yes.
1:03:08 > 1:03:10- ..as a noun.- Yes, recipe or style of cooking.
1:03:10 > 1:03:11What does it mean - Delia?
1:03:11 > 1:03:15"The recipes or style of cooking of British cookery writer Delia Smith."
1:03:15 > 1:03:17- Ah!- And the Rolling Stones connection,
1:03:17 > 1:03:19it's perhaps not as scandalous as you might think.
1:03:19 > 1:03:21There's a cake on the front of Let It Bleed
1:03:21 > 1:03:23and that cake was made by Delia Smith.
1:03:23 > 1:03:25- Yeah!- HUGH: That's, um...
1:03:25 > 1:03:27APPLAUSE
1:03:27 > 1:03:29- That's obscure.- Yeah.
1:03:30 > 1:03:33I hope their question's as easy as that!
1:03:33 > 1:03:34LAUGHTER
1:03:34 > 1:03:38Can you think of one way that you would use Delia actually as a word?
1:03:38 > 1:03:40"You never get a duff Delia."
1:03:40 > 1:03:43LAUGHTER
1:03:43 > 1:03:44"But you can get a Fanny Cradock."
1:03:44 > 1:03:47LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
1:03:52 > 1:03:57There was an example on the screen. It said, "Example - a Delia dish."
1:03:57 > 1:04:00Said it was a modifier. "So that's a very Delia dish."
1:04:00 > 1:04:02OK, er, Brian's team, time for your bag of clues.
1:04:02 > 1:04:05- Ainsley, please, what's the first one out?- Absolutely.
1:04:05 > 1:04:07The first item out of the bag is...
1:04:10 > 1:04:12..a birthday card.
1:04:12 > 1:04:15Is it a particular birthday card?
1:04:15 > 1:04:17- Yes, it is.- "Happy birthday, Mum"?
1:04:17 > 1:04:22So it's, er, it's a woman making a seesaw for her children.
1:04:22 > 1:04:25Right, so that's the birthday card. Any guesses?
1:04:27 > 1:04:29- Don't look at me!- You look... LAUGHTER
1:04:29 > 1:04:32I know, I know! But I mean, a human seesaw birthday card,
1:04:32 > 1:04:35- "Happy birthday, Mother". - OK, what's the second clue?
1:04:35 > 1:04:37The second clue is...
1:04:37 > 1:04:42ingredients for a Victoria sandwich.
1:04:42 > 1:04:44Victoria sandwich.
1:04:44 > 1:04:46That's Women's Institute, isn't it?
1:04:46 > 1:04:49It's the sort of person who'd weigh their eggs.
1:04:49 > 1:04:50Any guesses?
1:04:50 > 1:04:53I've got a feeling, but I might be wrong, but if you carry on.
1:04:53 > 1:04:55Let's go for the third clue.
1:04:55 > 1:04:57And finally...
1:04:57 > 1:05:00Um...another swimsuit?
1:05:01 > 1:05:04- Oh...- It's a floral top. - A floral jacket.
1:05:04 > 1:05:06It must be Mary Berry, isn't it?
1:05:06 > 1:05:09It is, of course, Mary Berry. Well done. Congratulations.
1:05:09 > 1:05:10APPLAUSE
1:05:12 > 1:05:15- Yes, it is Mary Berry. Richard, why? - We'll start with the third clue,
1:05:15 > 1:05:18the floral bomber jacket she wore on Bake Off. It sold out immediately.
1:05:18 > 1:05:22It was £30, that bomber jacket. You can now buy it for £200 on eBay.
1:05:22 > 1:05:25It instantly flew off the shelves. The second one...
1:05:25 > 1:05:26Er, I mean, it's a cake. LAUGHTER
1:05:26 > 1:05:29It's not exactly, er, the most cryptic clue we've got.
1:05:29 > 1:05:32- It's not exactly 3-2-1, is it? - No, it's not. It's a cake.
1:05:32 > 1:05:34She makes cakes. The woman makes cakes. This is a cake.
1:05:34 > 1:05:37- There's a cake.- A cake, right!- But the first one is more interesting.
1:05:37 > 1:05:40Mary Berry herself was recently looking for a birthday card
1:05:40 > 1:05:44for a friend and she came across this in a shop and, in 1938,
1:05:44 > 1:05:48alongside her mum and her brother, she won a photography competition.
1:05:48 > 1:05:51They took a photograph of her and that photograph turned up
1:05:51 > 1:05:54- on this very birthday card...- Wow! - Wow!- ..that she saw in the shop.
1:05:54 > 1:05:58So that is Mary Berry with her brother and her mother in 1938.
1:05:58 > 1:06:00- AUDIENCE GASPS - At the end of that round,
1:06:00 > 1:06:04I'm going to give Hugh's team no points and Brian's team one point.
1:06:04 > 1:06:06Let's have a huge hand for Ainsley Harriott!
1:06:06 > 1:06:08APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
1:06:10 > 1:06:14Well, that brings us to the end of part two and the scores are...
1:06:14 > 1:06:16Brian's team has 10 points.
1:06:16 > 1:06:19And, in the lead, it's Hugh's team with 11 points.
1:06:19 > 1:06:21APPLAUSE
1:06:25 > 1:06:29The final part of All About Two looks at the standout events
1:06:29 > 1:06:32and one-off memorable scenes that we just had to show you again.
1:06:32 > 1:06:34This round is about moments.
1:06:34 > 1:06:38Tonight, they play live on television for the first time. The Stone Roses.
1:06:38 > 1:06:40INTRO TO: "Made of Stone"
1:06:51 > 1:06:53Did you like that? HE LAUGHS
1:06:53 > 1:06:54Janet...!
1:06:58 > 1:07:02# Your knuckles whiten on the wheel... #
1:07:02 > 1:07:04Oh! Hi!
1:07:05 > 1:07:07How are you doing? All right?
1:07:07 > 1:07:11What first, Debbie, attracted you to the millionaire Paul Daniels?
1:07:11 > 1:07:13LAUGHTER
1:07:13 > 1:07:15# And the... # POWER CUTS OUT
1:07:18 > 1:07:20- What's happened? CREW MEMBER:- Just coming.
1:07:20 > 1:07:23- Hey! Get past! - Well, I'm sorry about that.
1:07:24 > 1:07:27I was entitled to express my views.
1:07:27 > 1:07:29- I was entitled to be consulted... - Did you threaten to overrule him?
1:07:29 > 1:07:32"The photo shoot was for the Daily Mail,
1:07:32 > 1:07:34"which made me feel really posh and upmarket."
1:07:34 > 1:07:36- LAUGHTER - Oh, you... See you later.
1:07:36 > 1:07:38It's a quite straight yes or no.
1:07:38 > 1:07:42- I will give you an answer. - Did you threaten to overrule him?
1:07:42 > 1:07:44And with Paul Merton this week, we were hoping to be joined
1:07:44 > 1:07:47by the Right Honourable Roy Hattersley, but sadly,
1:07:47 > 1:07:49and for the third time in our brief history,
1:07:49 > 1:07:50he's pulled out at the last minute.
1:07:51 > 1:07:54- Would you be kind now to leave, please?- Please leave the studio.
1:07:54 > 1:07:58- Why?- Oh, John, come on... - We were talking about comedy.
1:07:58 > 1:08:02- I am a comedy writer...! - John, cool it, for God's sake, love!
1:08:02 > 1:08:05So, as his replacement, liable to give much the same performance,
1:08:05 > 1:08:07and imbued with many of the same qualities,
1:08:07 > 1:08:09we're delighted to welcome a tub of lard.
1:08:09 > 1:08:11LAUGHTER
1:08:11 > 1:08:12APPLAUSE
1:08:12 > 1:08:16- Don't turn your back on me any more! - I can't... I can't look at you. Ow!
1:08:16 > 1:08:20- Now, hold... Hold... Hold on!- Don't! Agh!
1:08:20 > 1:08:21Been here long, sir?
1:08:21 > 1:08:24- You like to flirt, don't you? - Of course I like to flirt.
1:08:24 > 1:08:26Banged anyone yet, sir? LAUGHTER
1:08:26 > 1:08:30Do you think it is, er, actually attempting a sort of mating ritual?
1:08:30 > 1:08:31Oh, marvellous!
1:08:34 > 1:08:37- Ow! Cor, it's sharp! - Look, he's so happy!
1:08:37 > 1:08:40Critics allege he's exploiting his subjects rather than...
1:08:40 > 1:08:42- Amateurs!- ..making social commentary.- Amateurs!
1:08:42 > 1:08:45I ain't...bovvered!
1:08:45 > 1:08:47APPLAUSE
1:08:52 > 1:08:56So, we have one final board of pictures and a game behind each one,
1:08:56 > 1:08:58so let's have a look at our first game.
1:09:00 > 1:09:03I'm going to show Hugh's team clips from the channel's archive
1:09:03 > 1:09:05and ask them to tell me what they think happened next.
1:09:05 > 1:09:10Here's your first one. This is Rick Stein with his dog Chalky in 1995.
1:09:10 > 1:09:13Well, cooks... I think they're a breed of themselves...
1:09:13 > 1:09:15DOG GROWLS ..a breed...
1:09:15 > 1:09:18Er... Cooks are... Cooks are sort of breed unto themselves.
1:09:18 > 1:09:20GROWLING CONTINUES
1:09:21 > 1:09:23Chalky? Are you all right, old boy?
1:09:25 > 1:09:27- Do you want me to carry on?- Yeah.
1:09:27 > 1:09:29Yeah, OK. GROWLING CONTINUES
1:09:29 > 1:09:30LAUGHTER
1:09:30 > 1:09:32- So what happens next?- Is it...?
1:09:32 > 1:09:34He looks like he's looking above the camera.
1:09:34 > 1:09:36So is it what we affectionately call the fluffy?
1:09:36 > 1:09:40The sound man's boom pole?
1:09:40 > 1:09:42Ducking in? Perhaps he attacks it? I don't know.
1:09:42 > 1:09:46That's a very intricate answer from Gareth. Anyone prefer any guesses?
1:09:46 > 1:09:49- Obviously, there's something up there?- I think he must jump.
1:09:49 > 1:09:51- He must attack it. He must jump. - He's got to.- Attack it.
1:09:51 > 1:09:53- You'd think he's attacking the mic? - Yes.
1:09:53 > 1:09:56We can only but see it. Let's show you.
1:09:56 > 1:09:58- Do you want me to carry on?- Yeah.
1:09:58 > 1:09:59Yeah, OK.
1:10:01 > 1:10:03I can... RICK LAUGHS
1:10:08 > 1:10:12I mean, how can I carry on with...?
1:10:12 > 1:10:13Whoa! HE LAUGHS
1:10:13 > 1:10:14CHALKY SNARLS
1:10:14 > 1:10:16THEN SNAPS Agh!
1:10:16 > 1:10:17APPLAUSE
1:10:23 > 1:10:25Do you know that happened to me?
1:10:25 > 1:10:29That precise thing happened to me filming in Africa,
1:10:29 > 1:10:31with a two-year-old male leopard.
1:10:31 > 1:10:35We were in the back of a Land Rover, filming in an open Land Rover,
1:10:35 > 1:10:40and the leopard came up and did that, basically, started rearing up
1:10:40 > 1:10:43and the guy in front driving it was, "Agh! Get it down!"
1:10:43 > 1:10:46If it had got into the Land Rover, it would've been like a blender!
1:10:46 > 1:10:48LAUGHTER But it really did that.
1:10:48 > 1:10:51It was one of the most frightening things I've ever been involved in.
1:10:51 > 1:10:54Less frightening when it's a small dog called Chalky.
1:10:54 > 1:10:55LAUGHTER
1:10:55 > 1:10:58Yes, Chalky took against the boom microphone hanging above him.
1:10:58 > 1:10:59Let's have another one.
1:10:59 > 1:11:03This is University Challenge from the year 2000.
1:11:03 > 1:11:05Another starter question. The nicknames Cheesemongers,
1:11:05 > 1:11:07Cherry Pickers, Bob's Own,
1:11:07 > 1:11:09the Emperor's Chambermaids and the Immortals
1:11:09 > 1:11:13are, or have been used, for which groups of men?
1:11:13 > 1:11:15UMIST, Bright.
1:11:15 > 1:11:18- BRIAN LAUGHS - So, Hugh's team, what happened next?
1:11:18 > 1:11:21Cheesemongers, Cherry Pickers, Bob's Own,
1:11:21 > 1:11:23the Emperor's Chambermaids or the Immortals?
1:11:23 > 1:11:26- BRIAN: I know what it is. - Names for what groups of men?
1:11:28 > 1:11:30Cox has the giggles at the moment.
1:11:31 > 1:11:34I think he's going to say homosexuals, is he?
1:11:34 > 1:11:37Is he going to say it like that? "Homo-sex-u-als"?
1:11:37 > 1:11:40- I don't know.- Shall we find out? - I think you're right.
1:11:40 > 1:11:42- That's a good guess. - OK, fine.- We'll go with that.
1:11:42 > 1:11:44Let's find out what happened next.
1:11:44 > 1:11:46Another starter question. The nicknames Cheesemongers,
1:11:46 > 1:11:48Cherry Pickers, Bob's Own,
1:11:48 > 1:11:50the Emperor's Chambermaids and the Immortals
1:11:50 > 1:11:54are, or have been used, for which groups of men?
1:11:54 > 1:11:57- UMIST, Bright. - Homosexuals?- No!
1:11:57 > 1:11:58LAUGHTER
1:11:58 > 1:12:01No, they're regiments in the British Army,
1:12:01 > 1:12:04who'll be very upset with you, UMIST.
1:12:04 > 1:12:06- LAUGHTER - Yes!
1:12:06 > 1:12:08APPLAUSE
1:12:11 > 1:12:13You're absolutely right, yes.
1:12:13 > 1:12:16Homosexuals is what he said. The actual answer was regiments
1:12:16 > 1:12:18- in the British Army. So, er... - LAUGHTER
1:12:18 > 1:12:21OK, let's have one more for Hugh's team.
1:12:21 > 1:12:24Have a look at this clip from International Pro-Celebrity Golf
1:12:24 > 1:12:26in 1981 and tell me what happens next.
1:12:26 > 1:12:28Now, Wogan, and he'll be doing very well
1:12:28 > 1:12:30if he gets down in three or four from here.
1:12:30 > 1:12:32Gives it a mighty old clunk.
1:12:32 > 1:12:34Well, the ball either went in the hole or past the hole.
1:12:34 > 1:12:36LAUGHTER
1:12:36 > 1:12:38Thank you! Good to have you here, Hugh!
1:12:38 > 1:12:39SOME APPLAUSE
1:12:39 > 1:12:41Would you like to narrow that down to one of those two options?
1:12:41 > 1:12:44- Was it Wogan hitting the ball? - Yes, Wogan.- Wogan hitting the ball?
1:12:44 > 1:12:46So is it...? Well, it would be remarkable
1:12:46 > 1:12:50if he got a hole in one, wouldn't it? Because he's Wogan, not a golfer.
1:12:50 > 1:12:53- I reckon he plays quite a lot of golf.- OK.
1:12:53 > 1:12:55Yeah, but not that much golf. Let's have a look at it.
1:12:55 > 1:12:58Now, Wogan, and he'll be doing very well
1:12:58 > 1:13:00if he gets down in three or four from here.
1:13:00 > 1:13:01Gives it a mighty old clunk.
1:13:01 > 1:13:05And it's hopping and running and going and looking rather good
1:13:05 > 1:13:07and slowing down and it wouldn't! It can't!
1:13:07 > 1:13:08COMMENTATOR LAUGHS
1:13:08 > 1:13:09CROWD CHEERS
1:13:09 > 1:13:12The greatest putt I've ever seen in my life!
1:13:13 > 1:13:14APPLAUSE
1:13:19 > 1:13:21It's just...
1:13:21 > 1:13:22It's just Terry Wogan sinking a putt,
1:13:22 > 1:13:25but sinking a particularly special putt. Why?
1:13:25 > 1:13:27Yeah, the truly amazing thing there is, of any golf tournament
1:13:27 > 1:13:30ever televised in history, every major golf tournament,
1:13:30 > 1:13:34professional golf tournament, that was the longest putt ever televised.
1:13:34 > 1:13:3699 feet for Sir Terry Wogan.
1:13:36 > 1:13:41It was beaten in 2012 and, er, what can you tell me about who beat that?
1:13:41 > 1:13:44- Tiger Woods? Rory McIlroy? - No, again, it was another non-golfer.
1:13:44 > 1:13:47It was Michael Phelps, the swimmer. What are golfers playing at?!
1:13:47 > 1:13:49LAUGHTER
1:13:49 > 1:13:51Thank you very much, Richard. Terry Wogan, the longest putt
1:13:51 > 1:13:53in history up until 2012. That's the end of the round.
1:13:53 > 1:13:56Hugh, you get three points. Round of applause to Hugh. Very good!
1:13:56 > 1:13:58APPLAUSE
1:14:01 > 1:14:04And we go back to our board and let's have the next round, please.
1:14:07 > 1:14:09For this round, we're joined by a very special guest.
1:14:09 > 1:14:11She brought arts to the masses,
1:14:11 > 1:14:14presenting BBC Two's Late Night Line-Up back in 1965.
1:14:14 > 1:14:17Since then, she's been a news and arts correspondent, a journalist,
1:14:17 > 1:14:20a novelist and even a member of the House of Lords. Before we meet her,
1:14:20 > 1:14:23let's have a reminder of her contribution to BBC Two.
1:14:25 > 1:14:26Hello and welcome.
1:14:29 > 1:14:32I wonder what you think of women's liberation.
1:14:34 > 1:14:37You said, in the '20s, you proclaimed, "Art is dead."
1:14:37 > 1:14:39Have a sip of tea, for goodness' sake!
1:14:39 > 1:14:41Do you think you're a racist, Bernard?
1:14:41 > 1:14:42Mr Crosby, this is the first time you've done
1:14:42 > 1:14:46- situation comedy on television, isn't it?- That's true, Joan.
1:14:46 > 1:14:50- Did you expect to spend 50 years of your life studying it?- Certainly not!
1:14:53 > 1:14:55APPLAUSE
1:14:58 > 1:15:00Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome -
1:15:00 > 1:15:02we won't give you the full formal title -
1:15:02 > 1:15:05Joan Bakewell, ladies and gentlemen, give her a round of applause.
1:15:05 > 1:15:07APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
1:15:10 > 1:15:14Now...you've been across so many great moments
1:15:14 > 1:15:16- on BBC Two over the years. - I have, yes.
1:15:16 > 1:15:18And some firsts as well?
1:15:18 > 1:15:21Yes, well, mostly firsts, because Late Night Line-Up,
1:15:21 > 1:15:25which began the beginning of BBC Two,
1:15:25 > 1:15:27was pioneering in every single direction,
1:15:27 > 1:15:30so we did lots of, er, cheeky things that no-one had
1:15:30 > 1:15:33ever thought of before, certainly not for respectable BBC One.
1:15:33 > 1:15:35BBC Two was rather louche.
1:15:35 > 1:15:39It believed in being sort of slightly bohemian, possibly drunk,
1:15:39 > 1:15:44certainly foul-mouthed, um, it was a kind of crazy channel to begin with.
1:15:44 > 1:15:46- Certainly, Line-Up was. - There was one show you did
1:15:46 > 1:15:49a bit later than that, actually, which also broke a particular taboo.
1:15:49 > 1:15:53It was called Taboo and indeed it was taboo.
1:15:53 > 1:15:56It was about where censorship stood at that particular point
1:15:56 > 1:16:00and I was challenged to think of something that was still
1:16:00 > 1:16:03taboo on television, cos everyone said, "Everything's allowed now,
1:16:03 > 1:16:06"There's absolutely nothing." And I said, "There is...
1:16:06 > 1:16:08"There is one thing that you never see,
1:16:08 > 1:16:11"even in very explicit sex scenes.
1:16:11 > 1:16:14"You never see an erect penis."
1:16:15 > 1:16:18- So we showed one. - LAUGHTER
1:16:18 > 1:16:20We showed it at great length, actually.
1:16:20 > 1:16:22HUGE LAUGHTER
1:16:22 > 1:16:24APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
1:16:28 > 1:16:33And...and, um, when we were filming, the crew and the director
1:16:33 > 1:16:39were so intrigued by how...what expression I should have on my face
1:16:39 > 1:16:42that they kept saying, "Keep filming, keep filming."
1:16:42 > 1:16:44And I was going, "Mmm. Ooh!"
1:16:44 > 1:16:46LAUGHTER
1:16:46 > 1:16:49And trying to invent different ways to respond.
1:16:49 > 1:16:54I circled around, looking up and looking down... Looking up again.
1:16:54 > 1:16:58And I'm thinking, "How long are they going to take this shot?"
1:16:58 > 1:17:01Would it not be easier to put him on a lazy Susan and slowly rotate him?
1:17:01 > 1:17:03LAUGHTER
1:17:03 > 1:17:07When he, um, when he flagged...
1:17:07 > 1:17:10- Hey! It happens to the best of us, Joan, yes?- We, um...
1:17:10 > 1:17:13It does, but we had his girlfriend on hand...
1:17:13 > 1:17:14- GASPS AND LAUGHTER - ..to...
1:17:15 > 1:17:18- Yes?- ..to boost... - Yes!- ..to boost the shot.
1:17:18 > 1:17:20- RICHARD: I'm slightly... - To get back on track!
1:17:20 > 1:17:22Well, you asked me if we did pioneering stuff.
1:17:22 > 1:17:24I'd never seen anything like that before or since!
1:17:24 > 1:17:27I'm slightly worried, Dara, about what this round will be about now.
1:17:27 > 1:17:28LAUGHTER
1:17:28 > 1:17:32It is taking a slightly darker turn, isn't it, at this stage?
1:17:32 > 1:17:36With Late Night Line-Up, you hosted the first of the review programmes?
1:17:36 > 1:17:39- Yes.- So you were at the foreground of criticism
1:17:39 > 1:17:41- and art criticism and cultural criticism?- Yes.
1:17:41 > 1:17:44So, criticism is what this round is about.
1:17:44 > 1:17:48We want you to identify which BBC Two programme is being slated?
1:17:48 > 1:17:50You get three quotes for each show. It's up to Brian's team
1:17:50 > 1:17:52in this round. Let's start with a nice easy one.
1:17:52 > 1:17:55Can we have our first piece of critique, please, Joan?
1:17:55 > 1:17:56"I'm afraid I thought..."
1:18:00 > 1:18:04- Fawlty Towers got terrible reviews when it first came out, I think.- Yes.
1:18:04 > 1:18:07- Interesting. Let's have another quote.- Another quote?
1:18:07 > 1:18:08"The sound of a man..."
1:18:12 > 1:18:16- Beginning to look like Fawlty Towers. - Yes.- Should we take the last quote?
1:18:16 > 1:18:18Definitely. Let's have the last quote.
1:18:18 > 1:18:20"A collection of cliches and stock characters..."
1:18:23 > 1:18:25BRIAN: It surely is, isn't it? MEERA: It's gotta be.
1:18:25 > 1:18:27- It's gotta be.- Fawlty Towers. - Joan, which is it?
1:18:27 > 1:18:30It was indeed Fawlty Towers.
1:18:30 > 1:18:31APPLAUSE
1:18:35 > 1:18:39- And it never did become boring, did it?- No, it didn't.- Not for a moment.
1:18:39 > 1:18:42In fact, voted number one in the BFI's poll of British TV shows.
1:18:42 > 1:18:44Some critics weren't so keen at the time.
1:18:44 > 1:18:47The second quote, the middle quote there, was from The Spectator,
1:18:47 > 1:18:50but the other two from an in-house BBC comedy script editor
1:18:50 > 1:18:53giving his professional opinion on the new sitcom.
1:18:53 > 1:18:56This is the man - former comedy scriptwriter Ian Main.
1:18:56 > 1:18:57Hello, Ian, if you're out there.
1:18:57 > 1:18:59There's an extension number there.
1:18:59 > 1:19:01You can ring him if you want
1:19:01 > 1:19:03and complain about it. In 1974.
1:19:03 > 1:19:05- The middle one, though? - It was Richard Ingrams,
1:19:05 > 1:19:08who was editor of Private Eye at the time. He wrote that.
1:19:08 > 1:19:11And in the second series, John Cleese wrote a character
1:19:11 > 1:19:14called Mr Ingrams, who gets caught in a hotel room with a blow-up doll.
1:19:14 > 1:19:16LAUGHTER
1:19:16 > 1:19:20- That's the way to get revenge, isn't it?- Let's treat ourselves
1:19:20 > 1:19:22to Basil Fawlty doing some bashing of his own.
1:19:22 > 1:19:24ENGINE STRUGGLES If you don't start...
1:19:26 > 1:19:27I'll count to three!
1:19:27 > 1:19:30One...two...three!
1:19:30 > 1:19:32Right, that's it!
1:19:32 > 1:19:33I've had enough!
1:19:33 > 1:19:36You've tried it on just once too often!
1:19:36 > 1:19:39Right! Well, don't say I haven't warned you!
1:19:39 > 1:19:42I've laid it on the line to you time and time again!
1:19:42 > 1:19:44Right, well, this is it!
1:19:44 > 1:19:47I'm going to give you a damn good thrashing!
1:19:57 > 1:19:59APPLAUSE
1:20:05 > 1:20:08OK, again, this round is for you, Brian, and your team.
1:20:08 > 1:20:10What is the second set of quotes?
1:20:10 > 1:20:13"Perhaps it wasn't a studio audience.
1:20:13 > 1:20:17"Perhaps it was one of those sound engineers operating a little
1:20:17 > 1:20:20"dial labelled 'canned laughter'."
1:20:20 > 1:20:22That could apply to so many programmes.
1:20:24 > 1:20:28- It could be something...- A new comedy show.- ..a bit revolutionary,
1:20:28 > 1:20:32like The Young Ones when it came out. It was quite anarchic.
1:20:32 > 1:20:35It's a good first guess. Let's have another quote.
1:20:35 > 1:20:39"Here was a show aimed amusing 2,000 people living in southwest London,
1:20:39 > 1:20:44"and bemusing ten million viewers who do not."
1:20:45 > 1:20:50Buddha Of Suburbia... Oh, southwest London. Citizen Smith. Maybe.
1:20:50 > 1:20:53OK, can we do the third quote?
1:20:53 > 1:20:56"If Yasmin Le Bon is replaced by Betty Boo in a fashion show,
1:20:56 > 1:21:01"is that a cause for regret or rejoicing? Search me.
1:21:01 > 1:21:04"But it must be incredibly funny, because the studio audience hooted."
1:21:04 > 1:21:07It's Ab Fab, isn't it? Is it Ab Fab?
1:21:07 > 1:21:11- Yasmin Le Bon replaced by Betty Boo. - It's not Citizen Smith.
1:21:11 > 1:21:16No, it's not. It's not The Young Ones either. I give up, me.
1:21:16 > 1:21:18That's why I'm thinking maybe it's Ab Fab.
1:21:18 > 1:21:20What are you going to go for?
1:21:20 > 1:21:22- It's a pretty good guess.- Ab Fab.
1:21:22 > 1:21:26Absolutely Fabulous. You're absolutely right. Congratulations.
1:21:28 > 1:21:31Yes, it wasn't universally beloved at the start.
1:21:31 > 1:21:33It's Richard Marston writing in The Times in 1992 about
1:21:33 > 1:21:35the very first episode of Absolutely Fabulous.
1:21:35 > 1:21:38Despite his views, the show ran for five series
1:21:38 > 1:21:40and picked up four BAFTAs along the way.
1:21:40 > 1:21:42Let's have a look at the moment that bemused him.
1:21:44 > 1:21:46Yasmin Le Bon's ill.
1:21:48 > 1:21:52Oh, my buggery bollocks. Why the bloody hell didn't you tell me earlier?!
1:21:52 > 1:21:55Her husband just phoned and said "Simon Le Bon"
1:21:55 > 1:21:58which I thought was really amusing.
1:21:58 > 1:22:00Amusing, darling?
1:22:00 > 1:22:02Yeah, very modern of him to have taken his wife's name.
1:22:02 > 1:22:06Oh! Bubbles, sweetie...
1:22:06 > 1:22:10- A phone rang and I think I may have found a replacement.- Good. Who?
1:22:10 > 1:22:12- Betty Boo.- Shit.
1:22:12 > 1:22:16APPLAUSE
1:22:17 > 1:22:20Thank you for joining us. Ladies and gentlemen, Joan Bakewell.
1:22:20 > 1:22:22APPLAUSE
1:22:27 > 1:22:29And at the end of that round,
1:22:29 > 1:22:32Brian's team have gained two points for Brian's team!
1:22:36 > 1:22:38And we come now to the grand finale of the show.
1:22:38 > 1:22:41We have a very special game lined up for you based on
1:22:41 > 1:22:44one of the BBC's most popular shows, the Great British Bake Off.
1:22:44 > 1:22:46Let's have a look at some highs and lows from that show.
1:22:49 > 1:22:50- On your marks.- Get set.- Bake.
1:22:54 > 1:22:55CLATTERING AND A GASP
1:22:57 > 1:22:58Oh!
1:23:00 > 1:23:03Breathtakingly bad. Claggy. A bit soggy right down the middle.
1:23:03 > 1:23:06You know what I'm going to say, don't you? No soggy bottom.
1:23:06 > 1:23:10# And cut yourself a little piece of cake, diddly-push! #
1:23:13 > 1:23:15APPLAUSE
1:23:19 > 1:23:23LAUGHTER
1:23:30 > 1:23:32- Has that always been in the Bake Off?- Yeah.
1:23:32 > 1:23:37Has there always been a squirrel with his...
1:23:37 > 1:23:39Second series.
1:23:39 > 1:23:43- That was in the show?- Second series. - And did nobody spot it?
1:23:43 > 1:23:49- YOU didn't spot it!- With his junk... - He's a proud fella.
1:23:49 > 1:23:52He is. Well, he's everything to be proud of, to be honest.
1:23:52 > 1:23:56I think it's shocking that it was on the show, but hilarious,
1:23:56 > 1:23:57but I'm finding it less hilarious
1:23:57 > 1:23:59given it's just over my shoulder now.
1:24:01 > 1:24:03Is there any more generic background,
1:24:03 > 1:24:05because every time I move my arms, I feel I'm...
1:24:08 > 1:24:10..somehow I'm adding to the situation.
1:24:10 > 1:24:12To explain our showstopper round,
1:24:12 > 1:24:14please welcome the cake crusader himself,
1:24:14 > 1:24:16Paul Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen.
1:24:16 > 1:24:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1:24:21 > 1:24:23Thank you very much for coming.
1:24:23 > 1:24:27- What a phenomenal success this show has been.- It's been incredible.
1:24:27 > 1:24:29We are very much like a family, the whole crew.
1:24:29 > 1:24:32- We've kept the same people for four years.- It is only four years.
1:24:32 > 1:24:37It feels like it's been there for ever, it has become so established.
1:24:37 > 1:24:38It is part of the landscape.
1:24:38 > 1:24:40It is only four series you've done.
1:24:40 > 1:24:42This is going to be our fifth year this year,
1:24:42 > 1:24:44and it does feel much longer.
1:24:44 > 1:24:48It's amazing how it's gone, and it's down to the contestants,
1:24:48 > 1:24:50- the bakers are incredible. - Yeah, particularly the bad ones.
1:24:50 > 1:24:52They're the ones you want to see.
1:24:52 > 1:24:56- They're the ones I tend to find. - What are the rules of the game?
1:24:56 > 1:24:58What do our teams have to do?
1:24:58 > 1:25:02Basically, you've both got an iced cake,
1:25:02 > 1:25:07and what I want you to do is decorate that cake thinking of the 50 years
1:25:07 > 1:25:11and its television programmes, and it must be decorated beautifully.
1:25:11 > 1:25:13You've got lots of things here to use,
1:25:13 > 1:25:16and I will judge at the end which one's the best.
1:25:16 > 1:25:18I don't want to see just piping chucked on,
1:25:18 > 1:25:20- I want you to think about it properly.- You want art.
1:25:20 > 1:25:24And it has to be in some way reflecting 50 years of BBC Two.
1:25:24 > 1:25:26We've given them some decorations to start,
1:25:26 > 1:25:28but they will earn other decorations by answering
1:25:28 > 1:25:31questions about the history of the BBC as we go along,
1:25:31 > 1:25:34so get somebody to go over and pick the ones you need off our stand.
1:25:34 > 1:25:37Is it a problem that we've already started eating some of the...
1:25:37 > 1:25:42To be honest, I am 25% of the way through some of your toppings already.
1:25:42 > 1:25:45So I wouldn't worry about it.
1:25:45 > 1:25:49I've got a cake down here as well, which I've got to decorate.
1:25:49 > 1:25:51All I've got is a small tub of hundreds and thousands,
1:25:51 > 1:25:53different colours, I'll grant you that, and no way of getting
1:25:53 > 1:25:57any extra stuff, because I'm not allowed to answer questions. That seems a bit harsh.
1:25:57 > 1:26:01- If you could just make the best of it, Richard, that'll be fantastic.- I'll show you!
1:26:01 > 1:26:02We'll see how you do.
1:26:02 > 1:26:05So we're expecting art of some description,
1:26:05 > 1:26:08but you can gain extra toppings by answering questions,
1:26:08 > 1:26:12and the questions we will start right now. Fingers on buzzers.
1:26:12 > 1:26:14Stand up, please. Get ready.
1:26:14 > 1:26:16Here's your first question.
1:26:16 > 1:26:19At which shop in Manchesterford did Mrs Overall work?
1:26:19 > 1:26:20Acorn Antiques. BELL
1:26:20 > 1:26:23You have to buzz, yes. Acorn Antiques.
1:26:23 > 1:26:27You get another topping. Take another topping if you need one.
1:26:27 > 1:26:29The BBC Two broadcast of which event
1:26:29 > 1:26:32had an estimated worldwide audience of 1.8 billion?
1:26:32 > 1:26:34- BELL - Brian's team?- Olympics, yes.
1:26:34 > 1:26:36- No, not an Olympics.- World Cup.
1:26:36 > 1:26:39- No.- A sporting event of some kind? - Not a sporting event of any kind.
1:26:39 > 1:26:43- Was it One Man And His Dog? - No, it wasn't. It was in 1985.
1:26:43 > 1:26:48- Snooker final!- Live Aid.- Live Aid, very good. Congratulations.
1:26:48 > 1:26:52Get another bowl of whatever you think will help you there. OK. Grand.
1:26:52 > 1:26:54How is it looking? They have covered...
1:26:54 > 1:26:57At the end of the day, it's got to look like something
1:26:57 > 1:27:01and represent something. These guys, I'm not sure what they're doing.
1:27:01 > 1:27:03- They're making something beautiful. - Let's hope so.
1:27:03 > 1:27:05Which show was originally called Peter Sellers Is Dead?
1:27:05 > 1:27:07- BELL - Brian's team?
1:27:07 > 1:27:10- Goodness Gracious Me. - Goodness Gracious Me, well done.
1:27:10 > 1:27:14- A bit of an easy one, but you get it.- Can I have some more KitKat?
1:27:14 > 1:27:17Other than open all hours, which Ronnie Barker sitcom started life on BBC Two?
1:27:17 > 1:27:19MAN IN AUDIENCE SHOUTS
1:27:19 > 1:27:22- You're not playing the game! - BELL
1:27:23 > 1:27:26You're not getting a topping for that,
1:27:26 > 1:27:29random audience member who threw in the answer.
1:27:29 > 1:27:32OK, for more toppings, what links Jeremy Irons, Tony Robinson
1:27:32 > 1:27:35and former Eastenders actress Anita Dobson?
1:27:35 > 1:27:37- BUZZER - Hugh?- They've all got names.- No.
1:27:37 > 1:27:39LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
1:27:42 > 1:27:45What we have here is a genuine failure to multitask.
1:27:45 > 1:27:48What BBC Two programme links Jeremy Irons, Tony Robinson
1:27:48 > 1:27:53- and Anita Dobson?- Oh, my God.- Anyone in the audience know?- Play Away.
1:27:53 > 1:27:56Play Away. Very good. Well done. Chocolates for you.
1:27:56 > 1:27:59Which '80s pop star voiced the opening Teletubbies line,
1:27:59 > 1:28:02"Over the hills and far away, Teletubbies come to play?"
1:28:02 > 1:28:03'80s pop star...
1:28:03 > 1:28:05- BUZZER Toyah.- Who said that?- Toyah.
1:28:05 > 1:28:07Toyah it is. Grab more toppings.
1:28:07 > 1:28:11- What exactly are you doing there? - Are they rabbits or aliens?
1:28:11 > 1:28:13What do you mean? They're rabbits.
1:28:13 > 1:28:17Which BBC Two star once said, "Nobody is like the person I am on TV.
1:28:17 > 1:28:20"Surely only Cruella de Vil or the Wicked Witch from Snow White."
1:28:20 > 1:28:22- Which BBC Two star said that? - BUZZER AND BELL
1:28:22 > 1:28:24- It was your team first. - Anne Robinson?
1:28:24 > 1:28:26- Not Anne Robinson, no. - Who said what, Dara?
1:28:28 > 1:28:30I'm sorry, I'm cooking!
1:28:30 > 1:28:33Which BBC Two star once said, "Nobody is like the person I am on TV.
1:28:33 > 1:28:36- "Surely only Cruella de Vil or the Wicked Witch..." - That would be me.
1:28:36 > 1:28:38That was you. Very good.
1:28:44 > 1:28:48You have to earn them! You have to earn them!
1:28:48 > 1:28:51Which BBC Two show featured a man in pyjamas
1:28:51 > 1:28:53- and dressing gown known as Stato? - BELL
1:28:53 > 1:28:56- Brian's team? - The football, the football one.
1:28:56 > 1:29:01- Frank Skinner.- Baddiel and Skinner, the football.- No, Fantasy Football.
1:29:01 > 1:29:03Yes, Hugh, well done, very good,
1:29:03 > 1:29:05but because you're being a bit of a know-all,
1:29:05 > 1:29:07you get to take as much as you want,
1:29:07 > 1:29:09- I don't care. - Can I have the cutters?
1:29:09 > 1:29:12To which BBC Two star did David Walliams once say,
1:29:12 > 1:29:13"You're very big with the over 80s.
1:29:13 > 1:29:15"You're sort of a slutty Alan Titchmarsh."
1:29:15 > 1:29:18BUZZER Er... I think that was me.
1:29:18 > 1:29:19It was you, yes. Yes, it was you.
1:29:19 > 1:29:23Slutty Alan Titchmarsh!
1:29:23 > 1:29:27Which BBC Two drama spawned the catchphrase "gizza job"?
1:29:27 > 1:29:30- BELL AND BUZZER - Boys From The Blackstuff! - Boys From The Blackstuff.
1:29:30 > 1:29:33Very good. Name the number one single The Young Ones recorded with
1:29:33 > 1:29:35Cliff Richard in 1986.
1:29:35 > 1:29:38- BUZZER It was Living Doll.- Very good.
1:29:38 > 1:29:42Sounds fantastic. Please at least pretend to take them off the table.
1:29:42 > 1:29:46Pretend to do the game as I have set out in the rules.
1:29:56 > 1:29:58It's anarchy, isn't it?
1:29:58 > 1:30:00Which BBC Two daytime business show
1:30:00 > 1:30:03- was originally hosted by Adrian Chiles?- Business show?
1:30:03 > 1:30:06MUFFLED: Business Lunch.
1:30:08 > 1:30:12I'm sorry, we're going to have to hear that again.
1:30:12 > 1:30:13MUFFLED: Business Lunch.
1:30:13 > 1:30:16It really is... We have some sort of technical difficulty.
1:30:16 > 1:30:18- Can we get something green? - I need green.
1:30:18 > 1:30:21Gareth, we will need you to say that four or five more times.
1:30:24 > 1:30:27HE GARBLES
1:30:27 > 1:30:30Mm-mm, mm-mm?
1:30:30 > 1:30:32Business Lunch!
1:30:32 > 1:30:34Disney Lunch?
1:30:34 > 1:30:36Bismarck's Lunch?
1:30:37 > 1:30:40HE GARBLES AGAIN
1:30:42 > 1:30:46- Business Lunch!- Business Lunch is the wrong answer. OK.
1:30:46 > 1:30:48LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
1:30:50 > 1:30:54It is, of course, Working Lunch.
1:30:54 > 1:30:57So sorry I couldn't give you the points on that one.
1:30:57 > 1:30:59Time is running out, so the last two questions.
1:30:59 > 1:31:03Which show featured Andrew Lincoln as a lawyer called Egg?
1:31:03 > 1:31:05- BELL That's Life!- This Life.
1:31:05 > 1:31:09That's Life! This Life was a very different show.
1:31:09 > 1:31:10Which show featured the Dove From Above
1:31:10 > 1:31:13- and George Dawes giving the scores? - BELL AND BUZZER
1:31:13 > 1:31:16- Shooting Stars. - Buzzing in was yourselves, Shooting Stars, of course.
1:31:16 > 1:31:18No, can't be arsed. OK, this one...
1:31:18 > 1:31:21Ten seconds, last question. This is vital!
1:31:21 > 1:31:23This could change everything!
1:31:24 > 1:31:28In what show would you find Igglepiggle, the Ninky Nonk...
1:31:28 > 1:31:31- In The Night Garden! - In The Night Garden, of course.
1:31:33 > 1:31:37Now, if you could all sit back down again.
1:31:37 > 1:31:40Mm-mm-mm-mm-mer!
1:31:40 > 1:31:43- Paul, thank you very much for joining us for that.- No problem.
1:31:43 > 1:31:45- They've been quite busy doing this. - Yeah.
1:31:45 > 1:31:48Will we look at Brian's team first? They're behind at the moment.
1:31:48 > 1:31:50It might be more useful for them to get the points.
1:31:50 > 1:31:53We'll look at Brian's team first. Let's pop up their cake.
1:31:53 > 1:31:59That's quite sweet. Now. It's mainly KitKats.
1:31:59 > 1:32:03- It's wood panelling! - Other bars of chocolate are also available, we should say,
1:32:03 > 1:32:05because this is the BBC.
1:32:05 > 1:32:06- It's a television!- It's a telly!
1:32:06 > 1:32:08OK, e to the i pi is equal to -1.
1:32:08 > 1:32:13So -1 + 3, why are we having to explain this, Cox?
1:32:13 > 1:32:18-1 + 3 = 2, so 2 BBC.
1:32:18 > 1:32:20- BBC Two!- OK.
1:32:20 > 1:32:24APPLAUSE
1:32:26 > 1:32:32As you say, it's a remarkable thing that e, 2.7...raised to the power
1:32:32 > 1:32:36of the square root of -1, multiplied by pi,
1:32:36 > 1:32:37+ 3 = 2.
1:32:37 > 1:32:39- It is remarkable.- That's remarkable.
1:32:39 > 1:32:43The channel has always wished to educate people as much as entertain them.
1:32:43 > 1:32:48Positively Reithian, it's Euler's equation recast as a channel ident.
1:32:48 > 1:32:51Explain to me, man who is trying to educate us,
1:32:51 > 1:32:55why is there a dog and a bottle of champagne?
1:32:55 > 1:32:57Thank you!
1:32:57 > 1:33:01Why is there a Teletubby strapped to it like in a hostage situation?
1:33:02 > 1:33:06There's so many levels. How are you finding it?
1:33:06 > 1:33:08I... Er...
1:33:08 > 1:33:10LAUGHTER
1:33:10 > 1:33:11I like the colours.
1:33:11 > 1:33:17I think the framework is OK. I think the screen in the middle is awful.
1:33:17 > 1:33:21But I do like the outside bit. I think it looks fantastic.
1:33:21 > 1:33:24I would mark you four out of five for that. Pretty good.
1:33:24 > 1:33:26APPLAUSE
1:33:30 > 1:33:36- May we see the second cake? - So this is a celebration of various programmes.
1:33:36 > 1:33:39APPLAUSE
1:33:41 > 1:33:44This is, first of all, Play School, so you've got the square window,
1:33:44 > 1:33:47the arched window and the round window.
1:33:47 > 1:33:50- AUDIENCE:- Ah! - Yeah, we thought it all through.
1:33:52 > 1:33:54This is One Man And His Dog.
1:33:54 > 1:33:57Admittedly, the man, if you look closely, is a golfer.
1:33:59 > 1:34:01It's all that was available at the time.
1:34:01 > 1:34:06And this thing that looks like some bananas have escaped from
1:34:06 > 1:34:10somewhere is, in fact, the raising of the Mary Rose, Gareth tells me.
1:34:10 > 1:34:15It is. It was a very famous BBC programme of the early 1980s.
1:34:15 > 1:34:18This is the Mary Rose, the Elizabethan warship,
1:34:18 > 1:34:20the flagship of King Henry VIII...
1:34:20 > 1:34:22FEIGNS SNORING
1:34:22 > 1:34:26Anyway, this here, Deborah has done this, and this symbolises
1:34:26 > 1:34:30three very successful BBC Two programmes, namely, which is it?
1:34:30 > 1:34:33This is Springwatch, because they've got the flowers coming out,
1:34:33 > 1:34:37and this is Autumnwatch, because the leaves have fallen down here,
1:34:37 > 1:34:41and that's Winterwatch, because they've got snow on their shoulders,
1:34:41 > 1:34:42and they're three rabbits.
1:34:42 > 1:34:44APPLAUSE
1:34:48 > 1:34:52And this, as you will recognise, is 2,
1:34:52 > 1:34:55which I believe is equivalent to the e raised to the power...
1:34:55 > 1:34:57LAUGHTER
1:34:59 > 1:35:01- You've given them four out of five. - Yeah.
1:35:01 > 1:35:06Having seen that, is there any way you'd like to mark them down?
1:35:06 > 1:35:09The 3-D models that you've done I think are very good.
1:35:09 > 1:35:13Deborah, I think those rabbits are very, very good.
1:35:13 > 1:35:18I like the Mary Rose as well. I like the sort of models with the dog.
1:35:18 > 1:35:21Normally, I say, if you make the dog, I would have given you higher marks.
1:35:21 > 1:35:24The fact that you just plonked models on it, I have to mark you down
1:35:24 > 1:35:27slightly, which I've got to give you four and a half out of five.
1:35:33 > 1:35:35The winner of the showstopper challenge is,
1:35:35 > 1:35:36of course, Hugh's team.
1:35:36 > 1:35:38APPLAUSE
1:35:44 > 1:35:48Wow, nothing against you, but that is astonishing.
1:35:48 > 1:35:51Apologies, let's have a look at your hundreds and thousands model.
1:35:51 > 1:35:53What did you do?
1:35:53 > 1:35:55First of all, both of those were amazing,
1:35:55 > 1:35:58particularly Deborah's thing. All I've got is hundreds and thousands.
1:35:58 > 1:36:01I decided to try and fashion a likeness of Paul,
1:36:01 > 1:36:04but all I've got is hundreds and thousands. I didn't have very long.
1:36:04 > 1:36:06So there it is. I'm sorry.
1:36:06 > 1:36:09It's not my best work, but I didn't have long.
1:36:14 > 1:36:17- Richard, I...- It's hard in the time, Paul.- It's very good.
1:36:17 > 1:36:19I've got to give you five out of five for that.
1:36:19 > 1:36:21- Thank you.- Well done.
1:36:22 > 1:36:24Well done, Richard. Well done, teams.
1:36:24 > 1:36:27Let's hear it for the wonderful Paul Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen.
1:36:32 > 1:36:35And that brings us to the end of All About Two.
1:36:35 > 1:36:37I can reveal that our winners tonight are Hugh's team.
1:36:37 > 1:36:42Congratulations to them. Commiserations to our losers.
1:36:42 > 1:36:44Well played to both teams.
1:36:44 > 1:36:49Please, thank you to Hugh Dennis, Deborah Meaden, Gareth Malone...
1:36:49 > 1:36:50CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
1:36:50 > 1:36:54..Brian Cox, Meera Syal and Dave Myers.
1:36:55 > 1:36:58Thank you to all of our special guests tonight,
1:36:58 > 1:37:01and, of course, to Richard Osman, ladies and gentlemen.
1:37:03 > 1:37:06Thank you for watching, not just now, but for the last 50 years.
1:37:06 > 1:37:07I'm Dara O Briain.
1:37:07 > 1:37:10Time for one more montage, but from all of us, good night.
1:37:15 > 1:37:18The winner is...
1:37:18 > 1:37:19Jo!
1:37:24 > 1:37:25He's done it!
1:37:31 > 1:37:33Happy New Year!
1:37:41 > 1:37:43- Well done.- Thank you.
1:37:45 > 1:37:48- You were wonderful, Bob.- Thank you.
1:37:48 > 1:37:51THEY EXCLAIM EXCITEDLY
1:37:56 > 1:37:58Oh!
1:37:58 > 1:38:00ALL: Aw!
1:38:05 > 1:38:06Oh, Rosie...
1:38:10 > 1:38:14And on that bombshell, it is time to end. Thank you so much for watching.
1:38:14 > 1:38:16- Good night!- Goodbye.
1:38:16 > 1:38:18- Goodbye.- Goodbye.- Goodbye.
1:38:18 > 1:38:19- Goodbye.- Goodbye.- Goodbye.
1:38:19 > 1:38:21- ALL:- Goodbye.- Good night.
1:38:21 > 1:38:23May I wish you, on behalf
1:38:23 > 1:38:25of everyone here on BBC Two,
1:38:25 > 1:38:27a very good night.
1:38:27 > 1:38:30WOLF HOWLS
1:38:30 > 1:38:31APPLAUSE