0:00:00 > 0:00:00- Subtitles
0:00:00 > 0:00:02- Subtitles- - Subtitles
0:00:03 > 0:00:07- # The old wheels are turning
0:00:08 > 0:00:10- # The guitar case is locked
0:00:10 > 0:00:12- Happy days!
0:00:12 > 0:00:14- # From foreign lands I will flee
0:00:14 > 0:00:16- # Back, back, back
0:00:16 > 0:00:17- # Back, back, back- - # All the way back to you
0:00:17 > 0:00:19- # Back, back, back
0:00:21 > 0:00:24- # The rock pulls - at the valley and lake
0:00:24 > 0:00:28- # And I'm at the waters - of my Babylon
0:00:29 > 0:00:34- # The longing for the blue slate - lives on inside me
0:00:36 > 0:00:37- # The land of the white Astra
0:00:38 > 0:00:42- # Bah-bah-bah-bah-bah
0:00:42 > 0:00:44- # Bah #
0:00:51 > 0:00:57- Shelley? - Tell Leanne the eagle is landing.
0:00:57 > 0:00:59- "Leanne, the knob's here."
0:01:06 > 0:01:08- Hiya.
0:01:08 > 0:01:11- Your mother's doing my head in.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13- Your mother's doing my head in.- - You don't have to live with her.
0:01:13 > 0:01:15- Yes, I do.
0:01:15 > 0:01:17- How was she?
0:01:17 > 0:01:18- How was she?- - How do you think?
0:01:19 > 0:01:21- Fat and annoying?
0:01:21 > 0:01:22- Fat and annoying?- - Yes.
0:01:22 > 0:01:23- And slightly smelly?
0:01:23 > 0:01:25- And slightly smelly?- - She's honking, Trefor.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28- She hasn't been to the toilet - since Tuesday.
0:01:28 > 0:01:31- That's the last time you buy - cheap turkey rolls for Christmas.
0:01:32 > 0:01:35- Did you get the Sat Nav?
0:01:35 > 0:01:38- No, I couldn't find it!
0:01:40 > 0:01:42- Ha, ha, ha, ha!
0:01:42 > 0:01:44- Couldn't find a Sat Nav? Funny!
0:01:45 > 0:01:48- Yes, it was meant to be a joke! - It's in my bag.
0:01:49 > 0:01:51- Where do you want to go?
0:01:51 > 0:01:53- Where do you want to go?- - Estate agent.
0:01:53 > 0:01:55- Handy. I was on my way there.
0:01:55 > 0:01:59- It's right next to the sex shop.
0:02:08 > 0:02:12- No, I won't tell a soul. - I know what a surprise is.
0:02:13 > 0:02:18- Surprise is 'syrpreis' in Welsh - so Mum's the bird, Belinda.
0:02:19 > 0:02:23- "I can't believe you're going on - this trip around Anglesey, Trefor."
0:02:23 > 0:02:25- I promised. Ta-ta.
0:02:25 > 0:02:28- "Mam hasn't had a dump for days."
0:02:28 > 0:02:31- I know. I'll be back - just after midnight.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33- "There'll be a mess here by then."
0:02:33 > 0:02:36- "There'll be a mess here by then."- - I've got to go. Customers waiting.
0:02:36 > 0:02:38- "Dick."
0:02:38 > 0:02:40- Are you free?
0:02:40 > 0:02:41- Are you free?- - Yes, if you want to go to Anglesey.
0:02:42 > 0:02:43- Who'd want to go there?
0:02:43 > 0:02:45- Who'd want to go there?- - About nine or ten of us.
0:02:47 > 0:02:50- A Christmas present for myself. - Brand spanking new.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53- Nice and shiny.
0:02:56 > 0:02:58- Can we see it?
0:02:58 > 0:03:01- Her, Trefor, her. Later on, yeah?
0:03:01 > 0:03:03- You can have a go if you want.
0:03:03 > 0:03:04- You can have a go if you want.- - No, thanks!
0:03:04 > 0:03:06- You don't know what it is.
0:03:06 > 0:03:08- You're disgusting, Danny!
0:03:08 > 0:03:10- You're disgusting, Danny!- - What's up, Leanne?
0:03:11 > 0:03:12- She's up the duff.
0:03:12 > 0:03:14- She's up the duff.- - You look upset.
0:03:14 > 0:03:17- Yes. I'll tell you later.
0:03:17 > 0:03:19- OK then.
0:03:25 > 0:03:26- Who were you phoning?
0:03:26 > 0:03:28- Who were you phoning?- - I'll tell you later.
0:03:28 > 0:03:30- A surprise.
0:03:30 > 0:03:34- Everyone on their phones and - no-one knew who they were phoning.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37- Mystery. I like mysteries.
0:03:37 > 0:03:39- You knew who you were phoning.
0:03:39 > 0:03:40- You knew who you were phoning.- - Yes.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42- Who?
0:03:42 > 0:03:44- Who?- - I daren't say. A surprise.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46- We shouldn't have secrets.
0:03:47 > 0:03:50- A surprise isn't a secret, Leanne.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52- If you say so.
0:03:52 > 0:03:55- Step on it, Trefor.
0:04:02 > 0:04:06- This is nice. 185,000.
0:04:07 > 0:04:08- Pricey.
0:04:09 > 0:04:10- What am I supposed to do with this?
0:04:10 > 0:04:14- What am I supposed to do with this?- - Type in Bodedern's postcode.
0:04:15 > 0:04:17- What is the postcode?
0:04:17 > 0:04:18- What is the postcode?- - I don't know.
0:04:18 > 0:04:20- We're going to have fun, huh?
0:04:20 > 0:04:25- Just had my hair cut - by those lovely girls in Divas.
0:04:27 > 0:04:31- I'm not going all the way - with you and the gang, Trefor.
0:04:32 > 0:04:33- No?
0:04:34 > 0:04:35- Where are you going?
0:04:35 > 0:04:37- Where are you going?- - I'm going to see a man...
0:04:37 > 0:04:39- ..who lives in Brynsiencyn.
0:04:41 > 0:04:45- Has the Sat Nav route been set - to go through Brynsiencyn?
0:04:46 > 0:04:47- I don't know.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51- Who's in Brynsiencyn?
0:04:52 > 0:04:55- Bob. We're such good friends.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00- Not as close as you and I, - though, Tref.
0:05:00 > 0:05:04- We haven't seen one another - for years.
0:05:08 > 0:05:13- Bob and I had so much fun - before he got fat.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17- He wasn't the same after that.
0:05:17 > 0:05:20- Everyone calls him - Fat Bob these days.
0:05:23 > 0:05:25- "Make a U-turn where possible."
0:05:26 > 0:05:28- Don't listen to her.
0:05:29 > 0:05:31- Jealous, Trefor?
0:05:31 > 0:05:33- Bob and Alwyn.
0:05:34 > 0:05:35- No, he's not, I hope.
0:05:37 > 0:05:40- I have some good news for you.
0:05:41 > 0:05:42- Oh?
0:05:42 > 0:05:45- I'll tell you - when we're all together later.
0:05:46 > 0:05:47- I can't wait.
0:05:52 > 0:05:57- I thought I might be early to - meet Bob so I brought a newspaper.
0:06:00 > 0:06:02- Do you want to borrow it, Danny?
0:06:02 > 0:06:03- Any tits in it?
0:06:03 > 0:06:05- Any tits in it?- - No. Not one.
0:06:05 > 0:06:06- Stuff it then.
0:06:24 > 0:06:26- Bloody hell, I'm angry.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28- Why are you angry?
0:06:28 > 0:06:31- Why are you angry?- - I've just argued with Siegfried.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33- You call him Siegfried?
0:06:33 > 0:06:34- You call him Siegfried?- - Yes - why?
0:06:34 > 0:06:39- Don't you have a shorter name - for him when you have sex?
0:06:39 > 0:06:43- Hard to say, "Oh, Siegfried, - you're so good, so big."
0:06:43 > 0:06:46- His name's longer than his todger!
0:06:47 > 0:06:49- Why did you argue?
0:06:49 > 0:06:51- Siegfried wants a baby but I don't.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54- A baby would make - your life complete.
0:06:55 > 0:06:57- Doesn't it, Trefor?
0:06:57 > 0:06:59- I don't know yet.
0:06:59 > 0:07:01- Don't you want the baby?
0:07:01 > 0:07:05- That's not what I meant. - I just said I don't know yet.
0:07:06 > 0:07:11- Everyone wants to win the Lottery - but it doesn't guarantee happiness.
0:07:11 > 0:07:16- I'd spend it on Belgian lager, - Afghan ganja and Thai brides.
0:07:17 > 0:07:20- Trefor, Leanne, - have you seen my engagement ring?
0:07:20 > 0:07:22- No.
0:07:22 > 0:07:23- No.- - Cool.
0:07:23 > 0:07:24- Nice.
0:07:25 > 0:07:26- Guess how much it cost.
0:07:27 > 0:07:29- I like guessing games.
0:07:29 > 0:07:30- 500?
0:07:31 > 0:07:33- And the rest. 30,000.
0:07:34 > 0:07:36- No way.
0:07:36 > 0:07:38- Siegfried has the receipt.
0:07:38 > 0:07:42- I'd never spend that much on a ring.
0:07:42 > 0:07:44- Siegfried's mad.
0:07:45 > 0:07:49- What would you spend 30,000 on, - Trefor?
0:07:50 > 0:07:53- Easy - a villa in Spain...
0:07:53 > 0:07:56- ..a private jet and a moped.
0:07:56 > 0:07:58- A blue one.
0:07:58 > 0:08:00- What about a house for us?
0:08:00 > 0:08:04- And a house for us - if there was anything left.
0:08:04 > 0:08:07- Is that your engagement ring, - Leanne?
0:08:08 > 0:08:09- Yes.
0:08:09 > 0:08:10- How much did it cost?
0:08:11 > 0:08:14- I was going to buy one - for 69.99 from the catalogue...
0:08:15 > 0:08:17- ..but we got that one for nothing.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19- You stole it?
0:08:19 > 0:08:23- It was my grandmother's. - It means everything to me.
0:08:23 > 0:08:24- It's priceless.
0:08:24 > 0:08:26- Cute.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47- What's wrong with you?
0:08:48 > 0:08:51- I'm laughing about something - Bob once said.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- We're such good friends.
0:08:56 > 0:08:58- Move up.
0:08:58 > 0:08:59- Full up, sorry.
0:08:59 > 0:09:01- Full up, sorry.- - Move!
0:09:04 > 0:09:07- Step on it. - I didn't expect to bump into them.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11- Where's the minibus?
0:09:11 > 0:09:13- Where's the minibus?- - Hold your water, Alex.
0:09:14 > 0:09:17- At least Leticia waved, Alex. Cute.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20- Her grandmother's not bad. Gilf!
0:09:20 > 0:09:22- How is the little one?
0:09:22 > 0:09:25- She's started talking. - She can say Dad.
0:09:25 > 0:09:27- You must be proud.
0:09:27 > 0:09:31- Yes. She calls Lottie's father Dad!
0:09:31 > 0:09:32- Bastard.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36- Even though she moans - and poos and complains...
0:09:37 > 0:09:39- ..I want her back.
0:09:39 > 0:09:40- He doesn't want her.
0:09:41 > 0:09:43- I've heard you've settled in school.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46- Deputy head of the Welsh department.
0:09:48 > 0:09:51- I'd take Leticia back tomorrow - and change her name.
0:09:53 > 0:09:55- I'm ready to take - some responsibility.
0:09:59 > 0:10:00- What's that, Alex?
0:10:00 > 0:10:01- What's that, Alex?- - Cock books!
0:10:02 > 0:10:05- Confiscated them from one of - the pupils. Perks of the job.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08- If Alex doesn't want - the name Leticia...
0:10:08 > 0:10:10- ..you could name your baby Leticia.
0:10:10 > 0:10:12- ..you could name your baby Leticia.- - No, thanks.
0:10:13 > 0:10:16- Trefor and I will love - our baby forever.
0:10:17 > 0:10:18- Do you know what you're having?
0:10:18 > 0:10:21- Do you know what you're having?- - Yes, a thick and ugly baby!
0:10:22 > 0:10:25- You won't love it if it's ugly.
0:10:25 > 0:10:27- It will be hard at first...
0:10:27 > 0:10:31- ..because they look like potatoes - when they're born.
0:10:34 > 0:10:35- Have you heard from Bryn?
0:10:35 > 0:10:37- Have you heard from Bryn?- - He's not coming.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40- He has something important on. - What about Lisa?
0:10:40 > 0:10:41- She said the same.
0:10:42 > 0:10:44- Do you think they're shagging?
0:10:46 > 0:10:48- Probably.
0:10:48 > 0:10:50- "Turn left in 300yds."
0:10:51 > 0:10:53- Is Jim James coming?
0:10:53 > 0:10:55- Yes.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58- We're going to have fun.
0:11:05 > 0:11:05- .
0:11:07 > 0:11:07- Subtitles
0:11:07 > 0:11:09- Subtitles- - Subtitles
0:11:11 > 0:11:12- HORN
0:11:14 > 0:11:17- Bloody hell, Trefor. - Look where you're going.
0:11:17 > 0:11:19- Sorry, Mr James.
0:11:19 > 0:11:22- What's he doing driving? - Does he have a licence?
0:11:27 > 0:11:30- Thanks for lending me the minibus.
0:11:30 > 0:11:33- The carrying capacity - is first class.
0:11:33 > 0:11:37- Did you shift all that furniture, - Mr James?
0:11:38 > 0:11:40- Eh? Oh, yes, everything.
0:11:40 > 0:11:43- Cat died, Mr James?
0:11:43 > 0:11:46- I don't have a cat - - just a Doberman!
0:11:49 > 0:11:51- Why did you close the curtains?
0:11:51 > 0:11:53- Why did you close the curtains?- - To hide the stash.
0:11:53 > 0:11:57- If someone snitches, - I'll know it's one of you.
0:11:58 > 0:12:00- Are your sons coming?
0:12:00 > 0:12:05- No - late night last night. And - they have a job to do tonight too.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07- What? Where?
0:12:07 > 0:12:11- The little man next-door - is off on his holidays.
0:12:11 > 0:12:16- Breaking and entering is my - sprogs' speciality. Easy pickings!
0:12:18 > 0:12:20- When's Bryn's court case?
0:12:21 > 0:12:24- End of February. - I'm getting worried.
0:12:24 > 0:12:26- What's it got to do with you?
0:12:27 > 0:12:28- I'm there the same day.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30- How come?
0:12:30 > 0:12:32- How come?- - Bryn Boobs dropped me in it.
0:12:32 > 0:12:36- He's said I was involved - to lessen his sentence.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38- You're both going down then.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41- You're both going down then.- - Not now, I'm not in the mood!
0:12:41 > 0:12:44- Piss off.
0:12:44 > 0:12:46- We're all free tonight.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48- Yes, and come to think of it...
0:12:48 > 0:12:53- ..the little man next-door isn't - the only one away from home tonight.
0:13:04 > 0:13:06- She's a mess!
0:13:06 > 0:13:09- She's made an effort, fair play.
0:13:09 > 0:13:13- She's worked hard to make herself - look that ugly.
0:13:14 > 0:13:16- Don't be so nasty.
0:13:18 > 0:13:21- Dammit, I've forgotten my purse.
0:13:21 > 0:13:22- Too right.
0:13:24 > 0:13:28- It doesn't matter. - Someone will lend me some money.
0:13:32 > 0:13:35- Do you want to buy one of these?
0:13:36 > 0:13:39- It's a Christmas festival.
0:13:40 > 0:13:43- You pay a pound - and choose a footballer...
0:13:44 > 0:13:46- ..and if you're correct, - you win a prize.
0:13:47 > 0:13:48- What's the choice?
0:13:48 > 0:13:51- What's the choice?- - Um, George Best...
0:13:51 > 0:13:53- ..Stanley Matthews...
0:13:53 > 0:13:55- Are they all dead?
0:13:55 > 0:13:59- Do you want to buy a square or what?
0:13:59 > 0:14:01- I can go back for your purse.
0:14:02 > 0:14:03- Step on it, Trefor.
0:14:13 > 0:14:18- I'd forgotten - that George Best was dead.
0:14:18 > 0:14:23- There we go, he couldn't - live without a drink, poor dab.
0:14:25 > 0:14:29- The tank was full - when I gave you the van, was it?
0:14:29 > 0:14:30- Yes.
0:14:30 > 0:14:31- Yes.- - Oh.
0:14:31 > 0:14:35- I want a tenner from everyone.
0:14:35 > 0:14:36- Hey...!
0:14:37 > 0:14:39- Apart from Mr James.
0:14:39 > 0:14:41- Why doesn't Mr James pay?
0:14:42 > 0:14:44- I paid him last week.
0:14:45 > 0:14:47- I'm skint.
0:14:48 > 0:14:50- Can I pay you again, Trefor?
0:14:50 > 0:14:52- Can I pay you again, Trefor?- - Me too.
0:14:55 > 0:14:57- OK then. Another time.
0:14:57 > 0:14:59- Where's your tenner, Tref?
0:15:00 > 0:15:01- I didn't think.
0:15:01 > 0:15:04- I owe myself a tenner.
0:15:04 > 0:15:06- OK then, away we go.
0:15:06 > 0:15:07- OK then, away we go.- - # Hi-ho, hi-ho... #
0:15:08 > 0:15:10- DISCORDANT SINIGNG
0:15:16 > 0:15:18- We're going to have so much fun.
0:15:25 > 0:15:29- We'll be between Gaerwen - and Brynsiencyn by then.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32- Grow up, Danny. - What are you doing with that?
0:15:34 > 0:15:37- Anglesey girls are minging. - At least she's pretty.
0:15:38 > 0:15:40- Tell him to throw it out.
0:15:40 > 0:15:43- Fair play, - it's just some innocent fun.
0:15:43 > 0:15:46- I'd rather give her one than Vera.
0:15:46 > 0:15:47- I'd rather give her one than Vera.- - Me too!
0:15:48 > 0:15:50- You could smuggle her into jail.
0:15:51 > 0:15:53- Are you going to jail, Danny?
0:15:56 > 0:16:00- My husband, Jock, and I went to - jail once. Welsh Language Society.
0:16:00 > 0:16:01- Which protest?
0:16:03 > 0:16:05- I don't remember!
0:16:05 > 0:16:08- Did anyone get hold of Jock - while he was inside?
0:16:09 > 0:16:14- No, but Jock got hold of me - the night we got out!
0:16:15 > 0:16:20- He was an animal after a drink! - Happy days!
0:16:20 > 0:16:21- Happy days!
0:16:30 > 0:16:33- I haven't seen Bob for ages.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36- He'll be so excited.
0:16:36 > 0:16:41- Hey, they chose - Bert Trautmann and Bobby Charlton!
0:16:42 > 0:16:44- Are you sure - you don't want one, Danny?
0:16:45 > 0:16:49- Are you coming in for a drink - and to meet Bob?
0:16:50 > 0:16:51- No.
0:16:51 > 0:16:52- No.- - He's very funny.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56- He'll say two jokes for my one. - How about it?
0:16:56 > 0:16:58- No!
0:17:03 > 0:17:04- I'm so thirsty.
0:17:08 > 0:17:10- Goodbye, Siegfried.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12- Goodbye, Siegfried.- - What did he want now?
0:17:12 > 0:17:14- He was arse licking.
0:17:14 > 0:17:16- He was arse licking.- - I'll do that since he's not here!
0:17:18 > 0:17:20- He wants me to move to London.
0:17:21 > 0:17:22- Are you going?
0:17:22 > 0:17:24- Are you going?- - We'll see.
0:17:24 > 0:17:26- Don't let the world pass you by, - Elen.
0:17:27 > 0:17:29- Your name is Elen, isn't it?
0:17:29 > 0:17:30- Yes.
0:17:30 > 0:17:32- Take every opportunity.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36- Listening, Trefor?
0:17:36 > 0:17:37- Listening, Trefor?- - Yes.
0:17:37 > 0:17:41- The bus isn't going to London today.
0:17:41 > 0:17:43- I know that, you nerd.
0:17:44 > 0:17:45- Don't call him names.
0:17:46 > 0:17:49- It's OK, Leanne. I'm used to it.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02- What does Alwyn like, Trefor?
0:18:02 > 0:18:06- Chess, folk dancing...
0:18:06 > 0:18:07- Chips.
0:18:07 > 0:18:09- Chips.- - Small ones.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11- That's not what I meant.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15- Is he a paedophile or something?
0:18:16 > 0:18:19- Alwyn's completely normal.
0:18:20 > 0:18:22- I have my suspicions about him.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24- I have my suspicions about him.- - He didn't touch me in Blackpool.
0:18:25 > 0:18:26- You're too old!
0:18:28 > 0:18:31- There's something - rather strange about him...
0:18:32 > 0:18:34- ..but he's a likable guy too.
0:18:34 > 0:18:36- He used to be with that Belinda.
0:18:36 > 0:18:40- Belinda liked him - but he didn't like her.
0:18:41 > 0:18:45- Anyone else would have - given her one. An open goal!
0:18:46 > 0:18:48- He might actually be gay! - Ooh, Betty.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53- He looks at you lustfully.
0:18:53 > 0:18:57- He should have had a threesome - with Fat Bob and Belinda.
0:18:57 > 0:18:59- There's be no room in bed - with Fat Bob.
0:18:59 > 0:19:02- You don't have to have sex - in bed every time.
0:19:02 > 0:19:04- Really?
0:19:04 > 0:19:06- I said so, didn't I?
0:19:08 > 0:19:10- Where have you been?
0:19:10 > 0:19:11- Where have you been?- - To see my brief.
0:19:11 > 0:19:12- Who?
0:19:12 > 0:19:15- Who?- - His solicitor. He's showing off.
0:19:15 > 0:19:19- You were supposed to be there. - You're in the shite now.
0:19:24 > 0:19:27- Right, lads, - the real drinker's arrived.
0:19:30 > 0:19:31- Away!
0:19:43 > 0:19:46- I love Leticia.
0:19:46 > 0:19:49- Tell Lottie how you feel.
0:19:49 > 0:19:51- Thanks for the advice.
0:19:51 > 0:19:55- You don't mind me pissing - while I'm talking to you?
0:20:03 > 0:20:04- Nice food?
0:20:04 > 0:20:06- Nice food?- - It was OK.
0:20:07 > 0:20:09- I'm glad you're happy.
0:20:12 > 0:20:13- What's that?
0:20:13 > 0:20:15- What's that?- - A picture of dogs playing pool.
0:20:16 > 0:20:17- I nicked it.
0:20:18 > 0:20:19- Why?
0:20:22 > 0:20:23- Did you eat, Vera?
0:20:23 > 0:20:27- Did you eat, Vera?- - No, I wasn't hungry.
0:20:27 > 0:20:32- And if I were starving, - I couldn't have paid for it.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35- What about the football money?
0:20:35 > 0:20:38- That's money for the charity.
0:20:39 > 0:20:42- RSP-something.
0:20:42 > 0:20:45- You have plenty of money - to buy booze.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47- Trefor lent me some money.
0:20:48 > 0:20:51- I would have paid for your food too.
0:20:51 > 0:20:53- Do you have any money?
0:20:56 > 0:20:58- We can't let her starve.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03- What are we meant to do - while she stuffs her face?
0:21:03 > 0:21:05- Another pint?
0:21:05 > 0:21:07- I fancy the scampi.
0:21:08 > 0:21:10- It looked really nice.
0:21:10 > 0:21:13- She'll stink even more of fish then!
0:21:21 > 0:21:25- "Trefor? Go and fetch Alwyn - from Brynsiencyn."
0:21:25 > 0:21:27- On my way.
0:21:34 > 0:21:36- What's the surprise?
0:21:36 > 0:21:37- What's the surprise?- - It won't be a surprise if I say.
0:21:38 > 0:21:40- I don't like surprises.
0:21:41 > 0:21:44- I don't know what happened to Bob.
0:21:44 > 0:21:46- He didn't reply to my calls - or texts.
0:21:48 > 0:21:49- Strange.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53- We were great friends.
0:21:53 > 0:21:54- He might be ill.
0:21:55 > 0:21:57- Bob's never ill.
0:21:58 > 0:22:01- His phone might not be working.
0:22:01 > 0:22:04- He could have come down to tell you.
0:22:05 > 0:22:07- Bob moves in mysterious ways.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09- Because he's fat, is it?
0:22:13 > 0:22:13- .
0:22:19 > 0:22:19- Subtitles
0:22:19 > 0:22:21- Subtitles- - Subtitles
0:22:25 > 0:22:26- What did you want to say earlier?
0:22:26 > 0:22:27- What did you want to say earlier?- - Not now, Trefor.
0:22:30 > 0:22:34- I have something to say, - if you're interested.
0:22:35 > 0:22:38- I was going to wait - until everyone was here...
0:22:39 > 0:22:41- ..but do you want to hear it?
0:22:41 > 0:22:42- Yes, please.
0:22:42 > 0:22:44- Yes, please.- - Well...
0:22:44 > 0:22:50- ..Nacw's boyfriend has found - a new girlfriend and left Nacw.
0:22:51 > 0:22:55- And she's asked - if I'll take her back.
0:22:55 > 0:22:58- I've forgiven her.
0:22:58 > 0:23:02- I knew things weren't right there - right from the start.
0:23:02 > 0:23:05- Who's Nacw's boyfriend's - new girlfriend?
0:23:06 > 0:23:08- A man!
0:23:08 > 0:23:09- Each to his own...
0:23:10 > 0:23:18- ..but I never saw the attraction - of a man with another man.
0:23:21 > 0:23:24- Apologise to Alwyn, Leanne.
0:23:24 > 0:23:26- What for?
0:23:26 > 0:23:28- She thought you were gay.
0:23:42 > 0:23:45- Where the hell have you been?
0:23:45 > 0:23:46- To pick Alwyn up.
0:23:47 > 0:23:48- Did you have to?
0:23:50 > 0:23:51- How was Fat Bob?
0:23:51 > 0:23:54- He'd turned into Invisible Bob.
0:23:57 > 0:24:01- Let's all go to Amlwch. - It's not far, is it?
0:24:01 > 0:24:04- Look at my balls!
0:24:05 > 0:24:07- Stunning!
0:24:07 > 0:24:10- I nicked them. Do you want them?
0:24:10 > 0:24:12- They're heavy too.
0:24:14 > 0:24:15- Where are Lisa and Elen?
0:24:15 > 0:24:17- Where are Lisa and Elen?- - Having a piss.
0:24:18 > 0:24:22- Leanne, are your tits - as firm as these?
0:24:22 > 0:24:24- Don't be so disgusting!
0:24:24 > 0:24:27- Do you want to walk to Amlwch, - Danny?
0:24:29 > 0:24:32- Thanks, Trefor. - Standing up for me finally.
0:24:32 > 0:24:35- Does anyone want to buy - two pool balls?
0:24:35 > 0:24:36- I don't want to go to Amlwch.
0:24:36 > 0:24:38- I don't want to go to Amlwch.- - Why not?
0:24:38 > 0:24:40- I'm on Pub Watch there.
0:24:40 > 0:24:44- Take your rug off - and no-one will recognise you!
0:24:49 > 0:24:52- Fu**in' hell! Bastard shit.
0:24:54 > 0:24:55- Fu**in' hell!
0:24:55 > 0:24:57- What's wrong?
0:24:57 > 0:24:59- What's wrong?- - I've broken my leg.
0:24:59 > 0:25:00- It hurts so much.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02- It hurts so much.- - Phone for an ambulance.
0:25:02 > 0:25:05- Is it 999 on Anglesey too?
0:25:13 > 0:25:16- Why didn't you go with Lisa?
0:25:16 > 0:25:18- I'm not a doctor, am I?
0:25:18 > 0:25:23- And anyway, she said she didn't want - me there. And she's the boss.
0:25:23 > 0:25:26- I don't want to spoil the sesh - for everyone else.
0:25:31 > 0:25:36- The ambulance boys bought - Denis Law and Barry John!
0:25:37 > 0:25:39- He wasn't a footballer.
0:25:41 > 0:25:44- Stop the bus. I want a wee.
0:25:45 > 0:25:46- Me too.
0:25:46 > 0:25:47- Me too.- - And me.
0:26:05 > 0:26:07- Let's see who can piss the furthest.
0:26:07 > 0:26:09- Or highest!
0:26:09 > 0:26:10- Or highest!- - Or longest!
0:26:14 > 0:26:17- Hurry up, lads. - It's a new year - we're all friends.
0:26:17 > 0:26:20- It's going from bad to worse.
0:26:22 > 0:26:25- I've never peed in public before...
0:26:25 > 0:26:28- ..but I can't hold on any longer.
0:26:31 > 0:26:33- Anyone else want to go?
0:26:33 > 0:26:34- Has Jim finished?
0:26:35 > 0:26:37- Yes.
0:26:39 > 0:26:44- I'm fine. I seldom go. - Dehydration according to the doctor.
0:26:45 > 0:26:46- You don't drink enough.
0:26:47 > 0:26:48- Away we go, Trefor.
0:26:48 > 0:26:50- Alwyn's not back.
0:26:51 > 0:26:53- Away we go, Trefor.
0:26:53 > 0:26:55- Have you seen the size of Alwyn's?
0:26:55 > 0:26:57- No. I was too busy pissing on Danny.
0:26:58 > 0:26:59- What's wrong with it?
0:26:59 > 0:27:02- Nothing. - It just made me feel inferior.
0:27:03 > 0:27:04- Was it big?
0:27:04 > 0:27:07- Like an elephant's trunk.
0:27:09 > 0:27:10- Were you talking about me?
0:27:11 > 0:27:13- Yes.
0:27:14 > 0:27:16- I thought as much.
0:27:22 > 0:27:27- Wahey! The Amlwch girls are going - to have it in the Adelphi!
0:27:28 > 0:27:30- Every orifice.
0:27:38 > 0:27:40- Those smell nice.
0:27:40 > 0:27:42- I'm starving.
0:27:42 > 0:27:44- Eating for two.
0:27:44 > 0:27:46- What will he call the baby?
0:27:47 > 0:27:49- I haven't though a lot about it.
0:27:50 > 0:27:51- Isn't it unlucky?
0:27:51 > 0:27:54- I don't believe in that. - I've thought of many names.
0:27:55 > 0:27:58- Such as? Both of us will have to - agree on a name.
0:27:59 > 0:28:01- Of course.
0:28:03 > 0:28:05- Fire away then.
0:28:05 > 0:28:07- Dylan.
0:28:08 > 0:28:09- No.
0:28:09 > 0:28:11- Why not?
0:28:11 > 0:28:13- Reminds me of someone from school.
0:28:13 > 0:28:17- He had freckles spots and glasses - like the Milky Bar Kid.
0:28:20 > 0:28:21- Dewi.
0:28:21 > 0:28:24- No, again from school. Dewi 'Drewi'.
0:28:25 > 0:28:26- Body odour.
0:28:27 > 0:28:28- No, BO.
0:28:31 > 0:28:32- Ann.
0:28:33 > 0:28:35- In tech with me. 'Annifyr'.
0:28:36 > 0:28:37- Sion.
0:28:37 > 0:28:39- I don't mind that.
0:28:39 > 0:28:41- Seven out of ten.
0:28:43 > 0:28:44- Sian.
0:28:45 > 0:28:47- Pity we're not having twins.
0:28:49 > 0:28:53- Since we don't know - the baby's sex...
0:28:53 > 0:28:58- ..let's think of a name - like Eryl or Ceri...
0:28:58 > 0:29:00- ..a bisexual name.
0:29:02 > 0:29:04- Unisex you mean.
0:29:04 > 0:29:05- Yes.
0:29:05 > 0:29:07- Yes.- - Mm, yeah.
0:29:07 > 0:29:11- "I've put Mam in the stairlift. - We have lift-off."
0:29:12 > 0:29:13- Has she had a poo?
0:29:13 > 0:29:15- Has she had a poo?- - "She's almost there, I'd say."
0:29:16 > 0:29:17- Good news.
0:29:19 > 0:29:21- Anwen, after your mother.
0:29:21 > 0:29:23- I don't mind that.
0:29:23 > 0:29:26- She won't be with us much longer.
0:29:26 > 0:29:27- How about your mother's name?
0:29:27 > 0:29:30- How about your mother's name?- - Anwen Rosemary.
0:29:33 > 0:29:35- Hold on, I've got it.
0:29:35 > 0:29:39- Anwen Bryn Fon Rosemary.
0:29:39 > 0:29:41- Class.
0:29:57 > 0:30:00- What are you doing, you pig?
0:30:01 > 0:30:01- You're disgusting.
0:30:01 > 0:30:04- You're disgusting.- - Chill out, Leanne.
0:30:05 > 0:30:07- Which hole have you used?
0:30:07 > 0:30:09- Which hole have you used?- - The right one. I'm old-fashioned!
0:30:09 > 0:30:13- I'll take the other hole, - I don't want to catch anything.
0:30:14 > 0:30:16- "At the roundabout, - take the second exit."
0:30:16 > 0:30:20- Second exit - good idea. - You'll be like that in jail!
0:30:24 > 0:30:25- Oy!
0:30:27 > 0:30:30- Sit there. You, sit there.
0:30:30 > 0:30:32- They're not right, Trefor. - Screw loose!
0:30:39 > 0:30:43- Benllech's so rough these days.
0:30:45 > 0:30:47- Move up.
0:30:53 > 0:30:54- I'm eating too much.
0:30:55 > 0:30:56- You need the energy.
0:30:56 > 0:30:59- You need the energy.- - I'm sure I can feel it kicking.
0:30:59 > 0:31:01- Do you want to feel it?
0:31:01 > 0:31:02- OK then.
0:31:04 > 0:31:06- Can you feel anything?
0:31:06 > 0:31:08- Can you feel anything?- - Six chips and a sausage!
0:31:10 > 0:31:12- Hello, can you hear me?
0:31:14 > 0:31:17- Let's go to Beaumaris - just us two.
0:31:17 > 0:31:19- They'll be here for hours.
0:31:19 > 0:31:21- I've never been to Beaumaris before.
0:31:22 > 0:31:24- Yes, you have. - On one of our first dates.
0:31:25 > 0:31:27- We had sausages - on a portable barbecue with rolls.
0:31:28 > 0:31:30- I sat in sheep poo.
0:31:30 > 0:31:32- I sat in sheep poo.- - And it rained.
0:31:32 > 0:31:35- I was scared of making - the first move.
0:31:36 > 0:31:38- I was soaking.
0:31:38 > 0:31:40- Were you?
0:31:41 > 0:31:44- Come on, Beaumaris. And don't be - scared of making the first move.
0:31:45 > 0:31:46- I'm shy, Leanne.
0:31:47 > 0:31:50- Trefor, when you see something - you like, you have to go for it.
0:31:50 > 0:31:52- Show your balls sometimes.
0:31:52 > 0:31:55- That's illegal in a public place.
0:31:56 > 0:31:59- That's not what I meant. - Come on, Beaumaris.
0:31:59 > 0:32:01- Away we go.
0:32:02 > 0:32:04- Onwards and upwards.
0:32:04 > 0:32:05- Love you, Leanne.
0:32:09 > 0:32:11- I thought you were going to be ages.
0:32:12 > 0:32:15- We got kicked out because Vera - tried to steal a dartboard.
0:32:15 > 0:32:20- I tried to explain that I don't - know what I'm doing half the time.
0:32:21 > 0:32:23- Come on, Trefor, let's go.
0:32:23 > 0:32:27- I did steal a set of darts - with Jocky Wilson's face on them.
0:32:28 > 0:32:30- He's dead too.
0:32:30 > 0:32:32- Poor dab.
0:32:32 > 0:32:35- There was something sexy about him.
0:32:35 > 0:32:38- Especially when he was sweating.
0:32:39 > 0:32:40- Common!
0:32:50 > 0:32:54- They won't miss one of their optics. - Shit, it's strong.
0:32:55 > 0:32:57- Have you phoned Lisa?
0:32:57 > 0:32:58- No.
0:33:00 > 0:33:02- Right, how many of you - lent me money?
0:33:03 > 0:33:04- Me.
0:33:04 > 0:33:06- How much?
0:33:06 > 0:33:07- 40.
0:33:07 > 0:33:09- 40.- - Oh, dear.
0:33:10 > 0:33:12- I only have my charity money.
0:33:12 > 0:33:15- The little children of Taiwan.
0:33:15 > 0:33:18- Poor dabs.
0:33:20 > 0:33:21- Trefor?
0:33:22 > 0:33:26- Would you lend me 40, my love?
0:33:27 > 0:33:30- Of course. Leanne.
0:33:35 > 0:33:38- Thanks, Trefor. I won't forget this.
0:33:38 > 0:33:41- Heaven awaits you.
0:33:41 > 0:33:45- I still can't believe the size - of Alwyn's whopper.
0:33:51 > 0:33:51- .
0:33:56 > 0:33:56- Subtitles
0:33:56 > 0:33:58- Subtitles- - Subtitles
0:34:00 > 0:34:03- Listen, Lottie, - I'm only going to say this once.
0:34:04 > 0:34:06- I want Leticia.
0:34:07 > 0:34:10- I'll say it again. I want Leticia.
0:34:10 > 0:34:13- I'm her father, I own half of her.
0:34:15 > 0:34:17- I don't know which half.
0:34:17 > 0:34:20- You and Raymond have the twins - so it's only fair.
0:34:20 > 0:34:26- You'll still have two and a half - children and I'll have half.
0:34:28 > 0:34:30- I don't care - even if you don't like it.
0:34:31 > 0:34:33- You can choose which half.
0:34:36 > 0:34:40- Goodbye. - You'll be hearing from by solicitor.
0:34:40 > 0:34:41- Piss off yourself.
0:34:44 > 0:34:45- Hey, that went well.
0:34:45 > 0:34:48- I think she knows - where she stands now.
0:34:49 > 0:34:51- You'll never believe this.
0:34:51 > 0:34:53- What?
0:34:54 > 0:34:58- Siegfried's set a date - for the wedding.
0:34:59 > 0:35:01- Congratulations. When?
0:35:01 > 0:35:03- The end of March.
0:35:03 > 0:35:04- Are you pregnant?
0:35:04 > 0:35:05- Are you pregnant?- - No!
0:35:06 > 0:35:08- And I'm not marrying him anyways.
0:35:08 > 0:35:09- Why not?
0:35:10 > 0:35:13- He's making decisions - without discussing them with me.
0:35:13 > 0:35:15- And I've made - a New Year's resolution.
0:35:15 > 0:35:19- Nobody's telling me what to do.
0:35:19 > 0:35:22- Leanne, have you made - a New Year's resolution?
0:35:22 > 0:35:23- Yes.
0:35:23 > 0:35:25- Yes.- - Does it involve me?
0:35:25 > 0:35:30- No. My resolution - is not making any resolutions.
0:35:30 > 0:35:32- I never keep them.
0:35:35 > 0:35:37- What's your New Year's resolution?
0:35:37 > 0:35:39- What's your New Year's resolution?- - I haven't made one.
0:35:39 > 0:35:41- Save money to buy a house.
0:35:41 > 0:35:43- Oh, yes.
0:35:43 > 0:35:46- I'd forgotten about that.
0:35:46 > 0:35:50- Sebastian Coe is the only footballer - I have left.
0:35:53 > 0:35:55- Cider, Vera?
0:36:11 > 0:36:13- What are you doing?
0:36:13 > 0:36:16- I had lovely chips - in Llangefni once.
0:36:16 > 0:36:19- But there was a long queue.
0:36:20 > 0:36:25- 19... 78, I think it was.
0:36:25 > 0:36:28- July.
0:36:28 > 0:36:31- The fish was lovely...
0:36:31 > 0:36:35- ..although the batter - was a little too crispy.
0:36:37 > 0:36:42- The mushy peas were slightly watery, - if you catch my drift.
0:36:42 > 0:36:47- Alwyn, does my finger smell fishy?
0:36:47 > 0:36:49- No.
0:36:49 > 0:36:52- That's the only problem - with these dollies.
0:36:52 > 0:36:54- You don't get the authentic smell.
0:36:56 > 0:36:58- # Ting-a-ling-a-ling, - ting-a-ling-a-ling
0:36:58 > 0:37:01- # Santa Claus' balls
0:37:01 > 0:37:03- # Ting-a-ling-a-ling, - ting-a-ling-a-ling... #
0:37:04 > 0:37:06- "She still hasn't gone."
0:37:06 > 0:37:12- Give her a tin of mushy peas - to see what happens.
0:37:12 > 0:37:14- # Ting-a-ling-a-ling... #
0:37:32 > 0:37:36- Jim James must have a huge bladder!
0:37:37 > 0:37:39- Who's Elen snogging?
0:37:43 > 0:37:47- The barman. Stolen him from the pub.
0:37:48 > 0:37:50- Lucky bitch.
0:37:51 > 0:37:53- I have a present for you, you prick.
0:37:55 > 0:37:59- I can't read that, I'm shit-faced. - What does it say?
0:37:59 > 0:38:02- Case dropped - lack of evidence!
0:38:03 > 0:38:06- I was only pulling your leg. - We're off the hook!
0:38:06 > 0:38:08- Happy New Year!
0:38:08 > 0:38:10- Happy New Year!
0:38:10 > 0:38:11- It's an hour away.
0:38:13 > 0:38:16- Hey, has Davina - enjoyed herself, Danny?
0:38:16 > 0:38:19- I don't know. - She hasn't said a word all day.
0:38:21 > 0:38:24- Old Davina's quite shy.
0:38:27 > 0:38:31- Hey, we have to organise - more of these trips.
0:38:31 > 0:38:33- Once a year.
0:38:33 > 0:38:36- Every New Year's Eve or something.
0:38:36 > 0:38:38- Why?
0:38:38 > 0:38:40- I like your company.
0:38:40 > 0:38:41- Really?
0:38:41 > 0:38:42- Really?- - Yes.
0:38:42 > 0:38:44- Why? We only abuse you.
0:38:45 > 0:38:47- I know you don't really mean it.
0:38:47 > 0:38:49- We do though.
0:38:50 > 0:38:53- It doesn't matter. - I'm still enjoying myself.
0:38:53 > 0:38:56- You need someone sensible - in your midst.
0:39:02 > 0:39:04- Hairy whore!
0:39:17 > 0:39:19- What's the surprise?
0:39:19 > 0:39:21- What's the surprise?- - Almost there.
0:39:21 > 0:39:23- What did you want to say earlier?
0:39:23 > 0:39:25- What did you want to say earlier?- - "Trefor, Mam's been."
0:39:27 > 0:39:29- Been where?
0:39:30 > 0:39:33- "She's had a dump, you knob. - It's massive, like a submarine."
0:39:34 > 0:39:37- You thought she'd gone - to a better place.
0:39:37 > 0:39:41- There's no place like home.
0:39:42 > 0:39:43- Everyone happy?
0:39:43 > 0:39:44- Everyone happy?- - Leave them.
0:39:47 > 0:39:51- What I wanted to say was... - Mam's left her husband.
0:39:51 > 0:39:55- The second one? - And she's going for a third.
0:39:55 > 0:40:00- No, but she doesn't want to stay - in Aberystwyth on her own.
0:40:01 > 0:40:02- What does she want to do?
0:40:02 > 0:40:05- What does she want to do?- - She wants to live with us.
0:40:06 > 0:40:07- Is she pretty?
0:40:07 > 0:40:09- I don't know.
0:40:09 > 0:40:12- Are you happy with that?
0:40:13 > 0:40:14- With what?
0:40:15 > 0:40:17- Mam wants to live with us.
0:40:19 > 0:40:27- Me, you, Anwen Rosemary, - Anwen, Rosemary and Shelley?
0:40:29 > 0:40:32- OK then. - We'll have more babysitters.
0:40:33 > 0:40:36- We need our own place eventually - - understand?
0:40:37 > 0:40:39- Loud and clear.
0:40:40 > 0:40:44- What's the surprise? I hope it's - a good one after all the build-up.
0:40:53 > 0:40:55- "You've reached your destination."
0:40:55 > 0:40:58- Destination surprise.
0:40:59 > 0:41:01- Everyone's sleeping.
0:41:01 > 0:41:03- They'll wake up.
0:41:03 > 0:41:05- FIREWORK SOUNDS
0:41:05 > 0:41:09- This is the surprise - Belinda and I organised for you.
0:41:12 > 0:41:14- Fire away, Belinda.
0:41:19 > 0:41:20- What are you doing here?
0:41:20 > 0:41:23- What are you doing here?- - He texted me.
0:41:23 > 0:41:25- Are you OK? Does it hurt?
0:41:25 > 0:41:27- Are you OK? Does it hurt?- - I have broken it, knobhead.
0:41:28 > 0:41:29- Which one?
0:41:29 > 0:41:31- Happy New Year, everyone.
0:41:32 > 0:41:34- Happy New Year.
0:41:35 > 0:41:37- To the new year.
0:41:37 > 0:41:40- 2014!
0:41:41 > 0:41:43- To Anwen Rosemary.
0:41:43 > 0:41:44- Who the f**k?
0:41:44 > 0:41:45- Who the f**k?- - To me!
0:41:45 > 0:41:47- To Nacw.
0:41:47 > 0:41:48- To Siegfried.
0:41:48 > 0:41:50- To Siegfried.- - Sod him - to freedom!
0:41:50 > 0:41:52- To Davina.
0:41:52 > 0:41:55- To Danny and me.
0:41:57 > 0:42:00- Here's the invoice - for the fireworks.
0:42:00 > 0:42:06- I'm giving the money to a good - cause - promoting cruelty to women.
0:42:06 > 0:42:09- I don't believe in cruelty to women.
0:42:09 > 0:42:12- You'll have to think - of something else.
0:42:13 > 0:42:14- Pricey.
0:42:14 > 0:42:16- They're the real deal.
0:42:16 > 0:42:19- Health and safety never sleep, - Trefor.
0:42:19 > 0:42:24- Trefor, you won - the football competition.
0:42:24 > 0:42:26- I didn't try.
0:42:26 > 0:42:28- I know! To me!
0:42:29 > 0:42:31- To Vera!
0:42:34 > 0:42:36- All the best, Vera.
0:42:36 > 0:42:39- I hope you survive another year.
0:42:40 > 0:42:42- I'm going to try my best.
0:42:42 > 0:42:44- I wouldn't like to lose you.
0:42:44 > 0:42:46- To us.
0:42:46 > 0:42:49- To us!
0:42:49 > 0:42:52- And Belinda.
0:42:52 > 0:42:55- And Belinda.
0:42:57 > 0:42:59- Thanks for the surprise.
0:42:59 > 0:43:03- Anyone want a Welsh cake. - I roasted them.
0:43:04 > 0:43:05- What are you on about?
0:43:05 > 0:43:06- What are you on about?- - Anyone want one?
0:43:07 > 0:43:10- I need the toilet. Move, Vera.
0:43:10 > 0:43:14- You've pissed enough, - it's time you had a cack.
0:43:14 > 0:43:15- Shut it!
0:43:24 > 0:43:25- Sorry about today.
0:43:26 > 0:43:28- For what?
0:43:28 > 0:43:29- I've been a real bitch.
0:43:29 > 0:43:30- I've been a real bitch.- - I didn't notice.
0:43:31 > 0:43:35- I'm worried about Mam and the baby.
0:43:35 > 0:43:36- I'm worried about you.
0:43:37 > 0:43:40- I worry about me sometimes. - Why are you worried?
0:43:40 > 0:43:42- You're so soft.
0:43:42 > 0:43:47- You let everyone walk over you - and shout abuse at you.
0:43:47 > 0:43:50- I'm quite innocent at heart.
0:43:50 > 0:43:53- I've noticed today, more than ever, - that this is the way you are.
0:43:54 > 0:43:57- You're the nicest man I've ever met.
0:44:00 > 0:44:04- This gang is together - because of you.
0:44:05 > 0:44:07- Don't change, Trefor.
0:44:07 > 0:44:08- I love you as you are.
0:44:09 > 0:44:12- Thank you. Happy New Year, Leanne.
0:44:13 > 0:44:15- And many more together.
0:45:14 > 0:45:16- S4C Subtitles by Adnod Cyf.
0:45:16 > 0:45:16- .