0:00:02 > 0:00:04Four celebrities who claim to know everything
0:00:04 > 0:00:06about their specialist subject.
0:00:08 > 0:00:12But can they cut it, on television's toughest quiz?
0:00:12 > 0:00:15They've agreed to put themselves in the hot seat
0:00:15 > 0:00:17in aid of Children In Need.
0:00:17 > 0:00:20But only one person can be the winner.
0:00:20 > 0:00:22Who will be crowned tonight's
0:00:22 > 0:00:26Mastermind for Children In Need?
0:00:41 > 0:00:46In the spotlight tonight, Karen Taylor, who has high hopes
0:00:46 > 0:00:49for her subject, the much-loved steeplejack Fred Dibnah.
0:00:49 > 0:00:55Next, Imran Yusuf, and the Hong Kong films of kung fu king Jackie Chan.
0:00:55 > 0:00:59A rather more scholarly offering for Russell Kane, Evelyn Waugh.
0:00:59 > 0:01:02And Jarryd Christmas, who answers questions
0:01:02 > 0:01:05on the children's cartoon series, Transformers.
0:01:05 > 0:01:08APPLAUSE
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Hello, I'm John Humphrys,
0:01:14 > 0:01:17and welcome to a special edition of Mastermind.
0:01:17 > 0:01:19Tonight, we bring you a light-hearted show,
0:01:19 > 0:01:21but all in a good cause.
0:01:21 > 0:01:23Here, to test their nerves and knowledge,
0:01:23 > 0:01:26are four brave comedy talents.
0:01:26 > 0:01:28More accustomed to making us laugh,
0:01:28 > 0:01:32they've agreed to take their place in the infamous black chair,
0:01:32 > 0:01:34in aid of Children In Need.
0:01:34 > 0:01:38But, we won't be giving them an easy ride because of that.
0:01:38 > 0:01:40They will still need to exercise their intellects
0:01:40 > 0:01:44in our two vigorous question and answer rounds.
0:01:44 > 0:01:47The usual rules apply, two minutes on their chosen subject,
0:01:47 > 0:01:50and two minutes on general knowledge.
0:01:50 > 0:01:53All the contenders have given up their time for free,
0:01:53 > 0:01:56so, if you would also like to donate, please log on to:
0:02:01 > 0:02:04The winner does walk away with something,
0:02:04 > 0:02:08our unique Pudsey trophy, but who will it be tonight?
0:02:08 > 0:02:13We'll soon find out, and let me ask our first contender to join us.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22And your name is...
0:02:22 > 0:02:23your occupation...
0:02:24 > 0:02:26and your specialist subject...
0:02:28 > 0:02:30Fred Dibnah, in two minutes, starting now.
0:02:30 > 0:02:34In which Lancashire town was Fred Dibnah born in 1938?
0:02:34 > 0:02:35Bolton.
0:02:35 > 0:02:40Fred's home was a Victorian building designed for what?
0:02:42 > 0:02:43Mill?
0:02:43 > 0:02:45A gatehouse. On which building was he working
0:02:45 > 0:02:49when he made his first television appearance on look North West in 1978?
0:02:49 > 0:02:51Bolton Parish Church.
0:02:51 > 0:02:54Bolton Town Hall, close! Fred's technical drawing
0:02:54 > 0:02:56became a feature of his television programmes,
0:02:56 > 0:03:00after drawing which cathedral?
0:03:00 > 0:03:03St Paul's Cathedral.
0:03:01 > 0:03:03Fred's Aveling and Porter steam roller,
0:03:03 > 0:03:06was originally named what after his first wife?
0:03:06 > 0:03:07- Alison.- Yes.
0:03:07 > 0:03:09After formal education, Fred was given
0:03:09 > 0:03:12an apprenticeship by Bill Rawlinson, in which occupation?
0:03:12 > 0:03:13Joiner.
0:03:13 > 0:03:16Where did he take first wife Alison and their daughters
0:03:16 > 0:03:18on holiday, although he spent much of his time
0:03:18 > 0:03:20repairing a chimney there?
0:03:20 > 0:03:21Blackpool.
0:03:21 > 0:03:23A teenage Fred attached two items
0:03:23 > 0:03:25to the top of a tall chimney for a bet, and the prank
0:03:25 > 0:03:29blamed on students. What were the items?
0:03:29 > 0:03:30Union Jacks?
0:03:30 > 0:03:32Which catchphrase associated with Fred,
0:03:32 > 0:03:37followed "It's done for", after he felled his first chimney?
0:03:37 > 0:03:38Do you like that?
0:03:38 > 0:03:42Born to second wife Susan, Fred's two sons are Jack and...
0:03:42 > 0:03:43Roger.
0:03:43 > 0:03:45Which of Fred's projects in his own backyard,
0:03:45 > 0:03:48was documented in the 2004 programme Dig With Dibnah?
0:03:48 > 0:03:49Sinking a mineshaft.
0:03:49 > 0:03:52Fred was a one-man band, but he did have
0:03:52 > 0:03:55one long-serving assistant on the ground. Who was he?
0:03:55 > 0:03:56Don Paiton.
0:03:56 > 0:03:58When he did his national service in Germany,
0:03:58 > 0:04:00to what was he assigned before looking after
0:04:00 > 0:04:02the regiment's buildings?
0:04:02 > 0:04:04Catering.
0:04:04 > 0:04:06Fred's early career was helped by a chance meeting
0:04:06 > 0:04:08with former art teacher Lonsdale Bonner,
0:04:08 > 0:04:10who, according to Fred, "talked posh".
0:04:10 > 0:04:13What fee did Bonner receive for every job he got Fred?
0:04:13 > 0:04:14£10.
0:04:14 > 0:04:17What part of a factory did he accidentally demolish
0:04:17 > 0:04:20with falling bricks in a rare mishap?
0:04:20 > 0:04:23Workshop?
0:04:21 > 0:04:23Blacksmith's shop. Which award did Fred
0:04:23 > 0:04:25receive from the Queen in July 2004,
0:04:25 > 0:04:28which he followed with a tour of London on his steam tractor?
0:04:28 > 0:04:29MBE.
0:04:29 > 0:04:31What did he make for the church..
0:04:31 > 0:04:32BEEP, BEEP, BEEP
0:04:32 > 0:04:35..where his son was christened in 1987?
0:04:35 > 0:04:37A weather cock?
0:04:37 > 0:04:38Correct!
0:04:38 > 0:04:42You had no passes, Karen, you've got 14 points.
0:04:42 > 0:04:44Thanks!
0:04:53 > 0:04:55And our next contender, please.
0:04:55 > 0:04:56KAREN URGES: Go on!
0:04:56 > 0:04:58AUDIENCE LAUGHS
0:04:59 > 0:05:01And your name is.
0:05:01 > 0:05:04Your occupation.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06And your chosen subject.
0:05:09 > 0:05:11Jackie Chan in two minutes.
0:05:11 > 0:05:16Born in 1954, what was his birth name which means born in Hong Kong?
0:05:16 > 0:05:19- Chan Kong-sang. - At the beginning of Operation Condor,
0:05:19 > 0:05:24Jackie escapes from what fate after drinking the cave tribe's holy water?
0:05:24 > 0:05:27- Being killed by them. - Having to marry the obese princess.
0:05:27 > 0:05:31The out-takes shown at the end of a 1981 film impressed him so much
0:05:31 > 0:05:33he began to use the same device in his own films. What was it?
0:05:33 > 0:05:37- Can you repeat the question? - The out-takes shown at the end of which 1981 film
0:05:37 > 0:05:41impressed him so much he began to use it in his own films.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43What was it?
0:05:43 > 0:05:47- Bloopers when stunts went wrong. - The Cannonball Run.
0:05:47 > 0:05:50In Dragons Forever, Betty says she isn't bothered about
0:05:50 > 0:05:53a man's looks but she hates a what?
0:05:53 > 0:05:56- Snob.- She might but a potbelly is the answer.
0:05:56 > 0:06:00The stunt mishap that nearly killed Jackie leaving him with a hole in his skull
0:06:00 > 0:06:02took place during the making of which film?
0:06:02 > 0:06:03Armour of God.
0:06:03 > 0:06:06What drink is advertised on the side of the double-decker bus
0:06:06 > 0:06:10Jackie's character clings to at the beginning of Police Story?
0:06:12 > 0:06:13- Pepsi.- Lemon tea.
0:06:13 > 0:06:16When questioned about his beliefs in Armour of God,
0:06:16 > 0:06:18the Hawk says he believes in a very powerful god
0:06:18 > 0:06:21that provides him with his food and lodgings. What is it?
0:06:21 > 0:06:24- Money.- What is the name of the kick-boxing champion
0:06:24 > 0:06:28who performs a spin kick during his fight with Jackie at the end of Wheels on Meals
0:06:28 > 0:06:31that extinguishes a row of candles on a table?
0:06:31 > 0:06:33Benny "The Jet" Urquidez.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36In Operation Condor, what does Jackie use to get down the mountain
0:06:36 > 0:06:39after he has escaped from the cave tribe?
0:06:39 > 0:06:42A big inflatable plastic balloon ball thing.
0:06:42 > 0:06:45A zorb, yes.
0:06:45 > 0:06:47While a pupil at the China drama academy,
0:06:47 > 0:06:50Jackie was chosen to be part of which opera troupe?
0:06:50 > 0:06:52Seven Little Fortunes.
0:06:52 > 0:06:55In Police Story, how many times does Jackie's character get his birthday cake
0:06:55 > 0:06:58shoved in his face after a misunderstanding at his apartment?
0:06:58 > 0:07:03- Three times.- What is the name of the co-star in Police Story 3: Super Cop
0:07:03 > 0:07:06who performs the memorable motorbike stunt at the end of the film?
0:07:06 > 0:07:08- Michelle Yeoh. - In Dragons Forever,
0:07:08 > 0:07:12the trial is adjourned after the expert witness is ordered by the judge
0:07:12 > 0:07:16to answer what question put to her by Jackie, the defence lawyer?
0:07:16 > 0:07:20- Do you love me?- No. I mean, I don't love you but the answer is correct.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25You have a total, Imran, of nine points.
0:07:25 > 0:07:29APPLAUSE
0:07:33 > 0:07:37Our next contender, please.
0:07:40 > 0:07:43And your name is.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46Your occupation.
0:07:46 > 0:07:48Your chosen subject.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53Evelyn Waugh in two minutes, starting now.
0:07:53 > 0:07:55Which university did Waugh attend from January 1922,
0:07:55 > 0:07:57he left without a degree and a lot of debt?
0:07:57 > 0:08:00- Oxford.- What title was given to the trilogy comprising Officers and Gentlemen,
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Men at Arms and Unconditional Surrender
0:08:02 > 0:08:05when it was published as a single volume in 1965?
0:08:05 > 0:08:06The Sword of Honour.
0:08:06 > 0:08:09Which novel about a middle-aged Catholic author first published in 1957
0:08:09 > 0:08:13is a fictionalised account of the nervous breakdown Waugh had on board a ship?
0:08:13 > 0:08:15The Ordeal of Gilbert Pinfold.
0:08:15 > 0:08:19How were Waugh and his first wife known to their friends because of their first names?
0:08:19 > 0:08:22- He-Evelyn and She-Evelyn. - Which Oxford club, probably based on
0:08:22 > 0:08:24the real-life Bullingdon Club is holding its raucous
0:08:24 > 0:08:27and destructive annual dinner at the beginning of Decline and Fall?
0:08:27 > 0:08:31- Bollinger Club. - In which novel does the Oxford-educated Emperor Seth
0:08:31 > 0:08:34try to modernise his country, the fictional African island of Azania?
0:08:34 > 0:08:35Black Mischief.
0:08:35 > 0:08:39In Brideshead Revisited, what does Sebastian Flyte call his teddy bear?
0:08:39 > 0:08:42- Aloysius. - The title of which of Waugh's novels
0:08:42 > 0:08:44was taken from a line in TS Eliot's The Waste Land?
0:08:44 > 0:08:47- A Handful of Dust. - To which village in Somerset
0:08:47 > 0:08:49did Waugh and his family move in 1956?
0:08:49 > 0:08:53- Pixton.- Combe Florey. In Scoop, William Boot is a nature correspondent
0:08:53 > 0:08:56sent abroad after being mistaken for a war reporter.
0:08:56 > 0:08:57For which national newspaper does he work?
0:08:57 > 0:08:59- The Daily Beast. - Which novel set
0:08:59 > 0:09:02at the beginning of the Second World War reintroduces characters
0:09:02 > 0:09:05from other works such as Basil Seal from Black Mischief?
0:09:05 > 0:09:06Put Out More Flags.
0:09:06 > 0:09:10In Vile Bodies, Jane Brown invites the remaining guests of Archie Schwert's party
0:09:10 > 0:09:12back to her house. What's her address?
0:09:12 > 0:09:16- Number Ten Downing Street. - In 1930, Waugh went to which African country to report on
0:09:16 > 0:09:20the coronation of its Emperor? He returned five years later to cover the war with Italy.
0:09:20 > 0:09:21Abyssinia.
0:09:21 > 0:09:24What is the name of the hero of the Sword of Honour trilogy
0:09:24 > 0:09:27whose unhappy experiences in the army are based on Waugh's own?
0:09:27 > 0:09:29- Guy Crouchback. - Who asked Waugh to accompany him
0:09:29 > 0:09:32on Fitzroy Maclean's military mission to Croatia in 1944
0:09:32 > 0:09:34where they were involved in a plane crash?
0:09:34 > 0:09:36- Sir Randolph Churchill. - In A Handful of Dust, what's the name of
0:09:36 > 0:09:39the married woman who has an affair with John Beaver?
0:09:39 > 0:09:43- Brenda Last. - Dennis Barlow works at the Happier Hunting Ground
0:09:43 > 0:09:46pets' funeral parlour in which novel set in California?
0:09:46 > 0:09:50- The Loved One.- In 1930, Waugh became a member of which Christian church?
0:09:50 > 0:09:52- The Catholic Church. - In Sword of Honour,
0:09:52 > 0:09:55what's the name of Guy Crouchback's wife who is killed by a doodlebug?
0:09:55 > 0:09:58- Virginia Troy.- Absolutely.
0:09:58 > 0:10:00What a round, you've got 18 points!
0:10:00 > 0:10:02APPLAUSE
0:10:09 > 0:10:11And our final Contender. Follow that!
0:10:11 > 0:10:12No!
0:10:12 > 0:10:14LAUGHTER
0:10:14 > 0:10:17I'm afraid you've got no choice.
0:10:17 > 0:10:21And your name? Your occupation?
0:10:21 > 0:10:24Another one of them. And your chosen subject?
0:10:26 > 0:10:28LAUGHTER
0:10:28 > 0:10:32Transformers, the early years. Two minutes, starting now.
0:10:32 > 0:10:36The Transformers cartoons features two opposing groups of transforming robots -
0:10:36 > 0:10:38the Decepticons and the Autobots.
0:10:38 > 0:10:40In which decade did it first appear on TV?
0:10:40 > 0:10:43- '80s.- In Divide and Conquer, who was so severely damaged in a battle
0:10:43 > 0:10:47that the Autobots travelled to Cybertron to get a new Cosmitron to repair him?
0:10:47 > 0:10:50- Optimus Prime. - Which evil scientist creates a hypnotic chip implant
0:10:50 > 0:10:54that overwrites an individual's will and reduces them to slaves?
0:10:54 > 0:10:56- Dr Arkeville.- I could do with one of those.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59In More Than Meets The Eye Day 1, which Decepticon remains behind
0:10:59 > 0:11:01on Cybertron on the orders of Megatron?
0:11:01 > 0:11:05- Shockwave.- Which Decepticon attempts to seize power from Megatron
0:11:05 > 0:11:09as their space cruiser is leaving Earth in More Than Meets The Eye Part 3?
0:11:09 > 0:11:12- Starscream.- Which intergalactic transport system
0:11:12 > 0:11:15do the Decepticons establish between Earth and Cybertron?
0:11:15 > 0:11:18- Space Bridge. - In A Plague of Insecticons,
0:11:18 > 0:11:22where do the Decepticons and Insecticons attempt to re-energise
0:11:22 > 0:11:24before they are attacked by the Autobots?
0:11:24 > 0:11:25What?
0:11:25 > 0:11:28LAUGHTER
0:11:28 > 0:11:29I'm not doing it again!
0:11:29 > 0:11:32You'll have to guess. Take a guess!
0:11:32 > 0:11:35- Uh...- That'll do. An oil refinery.
0:11:35 > 0:11:38Which of the Autobots acts as the medic to the other robots
0:11:38 > 0:11:41by transforming into an ambulance in which they are placed for repairs?
0:11:41 > 0:11:46- Ratchet.- Who is the leader of the Constructicons who steal energy discs
0:11:46 > 0:11:48and bring them to Megatron in Heavy Metal War?
0:11:48 > 0:11:52- Scrapper.- When Starscream goes with Dr Arkeville to his secret laboratory,
0:11:52 > 0:11:55what code words are used to open the door?
0:11:55 > 0:11:57- Oh, um... Open sesame.- Yes!
0:11:57 > 0:12:00In Transport To Oblivion, what is the maximum time
0:12:00 > 0:12:03the Space Bridge to Cybertron will be operable for?
0:12:03 > 0:12:06- Oh, it's in astroseconds... - It's 11 minutes.
0:12:06 > 0:12:10Which of the Dinobots is saved by Optimus Prime when the meteorite explodes?
0:12:10 > 0:12:14- Grimlock.- In Ultimate Doom: Search, Dr Arkeville's mind control implants
0:12:14 > 0:12:18are overridden by which device causing him to create more slaves?
0:12:18 > 0:12:21Oh, um... God! I know it!
0:12:21 > 0:12:25- You do. Tell me. - Soundwave uses it!- Yes.
0:12:25 > 0:12:28It's his special power!
0:12:28 > 0:12:32Oh! The...
0:12:32 > 0:12:33- The thing interrupter. - Yes.
0:12:33 > 0:12:35- BEEP BEEP BEEP - No.
0:12:35 > 0:12:37LAUGHTER
0:12:37 > 0:12:41- It's the audio disruptor. But you were ever so close.- Thanks.
0:12:41 > 0:12:45Has everybody in that thing got to have a "con" after their name?
0:12:45 > 0:12:47Yeah. I enjoyed hearing you say all those names.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50Thanks for making me. I appreciate it. Anyway, I regret to say
0:12:50 > 0:12:53- that you got quite a good score. 10 points. - APPLAUSE
0:13:00 > 0:13:04So that's the first round done. Let's look at the scores.
0:13:04 > 0:13:07In fourth place with nine points, Imran Yusuf.
0:13:07 > 0:13:10Third place, 10 points, Jarred Christmas.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Second place, 14 points, Karen Taylor.
0:13:12 > 0:13:15In the lead with 18 points, Russell Kane.
0:13:15 > 0:13:18APPLAUSE
0:13:21 > 0:13:25So it is the General Knowledge Round now. Let's get on with it.
0:13:25 > 0:13:29Imran needs to join us again if he would, please.
0:13:29 > 0:13:30Mm, mm, mm.
0:13:30 > 0:13:33- How tall are you?- Six foot two.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35You look about six foot nine.
0:13:35 > 0:13:39- It's because of...my diet. - That's what it'll be.
0:13:39 > 0:13:43- Now why Jackie Chan? - Because he's my hero.- Why?- Why?
0:13:43 > 0:13:46Because he's a true story of an underdog.
0:13:46 > 0:13:49A guy who came from nothing and made it massive in Asia,
0:13:49 > 0:13:51which is what I want to be.
0:13:51 > 0:13:54- You want to be massive in Asia?- Yes. - What about this country?
0:13:54 > 0:13:56I'll come here next.
0:13:56 > 0:14:00This show is being broadcast in Britain.
0:14:02 > 0:14:04I need to speak to my agent, I think.
0:14:04 > 0:14:07I thought this was the Jackie Chan Quiz Show!
0:14:07 > 0:14:11I saw my first Jackie Chan film when I was eight years old.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13I rented it from a video shop. It was Armour Of God.
0:14:13 > 0:14:17I thought, "This is what I want to do when I grow up." And look at me now!
0:14:17 > 0:14:21You did very well, nine points, which is normally a good score
0:14:21 > 0:14:23but you're up against some amazing talents.
0:14:23 > 0:14:26- People have done their homework. - People have done their homework.
0:14:26 > 0:14:29- We're now going to do general knowledge.- Wicked.
0:14:29 > 0:14:32Wicked. Let's see how we get on. Two minutes.
0:14:32 > 0:14:36The deerstalker hat is traditionally associated with which fictional detective?
0:14:36 > 0:14:37Sherlock Holmes.
0:14:37 > 0:14:40Which boat is used on the canals of Venice
0:14:40 > 0:14:43and is in the paintings of Carpaccio from the late 15th century?
0:14:43 > 0:14:45The gondola?
0:14:45 > 0:14:48The interchange on the M6 at Gravelly Hill near Birmingham
0:14:48 > 0:14:51is known by what nickname because of its flyovers and underpasses?
0:14:51 > 0:14:54- Jean-Claude Van Damme. - Close! Spaghetti Junction.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58Who was dropped as a judge from the American X Factor in May 2011,
0:14:58 > 0:15:01because Americans couldn't understand her accent?
0:15:01 > 0:15:03NEWCASTLE ACCENT: Cheryl Cole.
0:15:03 > 0:15:07Which desert animal has been described as a horse designed by a committee?
0:15:10 > 0:15:13- Pass? Is that a pass?- Pass.
0:15:13 > 0:15:15In the film When Harry Met Sally,
0:15:15 > 0:15:19which actress's fake orgasm causes a diner to say, "I'll have what she's having"?
0:15:19 > 0:15:20Meg Ryan.
0:15:20 > 0:15:25Which colour gave Coldplay a number four UK hit single in July 2000?
0:15:26 > 0:15:28Pick a colour, any colour.
0:15:28 > 0:15:29- Blue.- No, yellow.
0:15:29 > 0:15:31Whose exhibition Love Is What You Want
0:15:31 > 0:15:35opened at the Hayward Gallery in the Southbank Centre in May 2011?
0:15:35 > 0:15:38- Picasso.- Close. Tracey Emin.
0:15:38 > 0:15:43Which Yorkshire cheese had a huge rise in sales thanks to Wallace and Gromit?
0:15:43 > 0:15:44Cheddar.
0:15:44 > 0:15:46- Wensleydale.- Argh!
0:15:46 > 0:15:51Near which city in Florida did the Walt Disney World theme park open in 1971?
0:15:51 > 0:15:52Orlando.
0:15:52 > 0:15:56Which musical with music by Sir Elton John is based on a film
0:15:56 > 0:15:59about a boy from a mining background who wants to be a ballet dancer?
0:15:59 > 0:16:00Ooh, Billy Elliot.
0:16:00 > 0:16:04What must someone have to become a member of the Handlebar Club?
0:16:04 > 0:16:06- A handlebar moustache. - That'll do it.
0:16:06 > 0:16:09Which Iowa-born author best known for travel books
0:16:09 > 0:16:12wrote At Home - A Short History Of Private Life in 2010?
0:16:12 > 0:16:15Oh...pass.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18According to legend which Anglo-Saxon King was severely told off
0:16:18 > 0:16:21by a peasant's wife for allowing her cakes to burn
0:16:21 > 0:16:23while he was hiding from the Danes in her hut?
0:16:23 > 0:16:27- Jean-Claude Van Damme. - You're wrong, sadly. Alfred The Great.
0:16:27 > 0:16:32What word for an animated corpse was originally the name of a snake god
0:16:32 > 0:16:34in Haitian and West African Voodoo culture?
0:16:34 > 0:16:38It wasn't Jean-Claude Van Damme, in case you were going to offer that one.
0:16:38 > 0:16:41- Zombie.- Correct. You had two passes.
0:16:41 > 0:16:44Bill Bryson was the author, born in Iowa.
0:16:44 > 0:16:48And a horse designed by a committee is otherwise known as a camel.
0:16:48 > 0:16:51You now have a total of 17 points.
0:16:51 > 0:16:53APPLAUSE
0:16:59 > 0:17:03And Jarred Christmas, come and join us again, please.
0:17:06 > 0:17:07- Yeah.- Yeah!
0:17:07 > 0:17:10I'm not going to ask you why the Constructors or whatever...
0:17:10 > 0:17:13- Constructicons. - I wasn't going to...
0:17:13 > 0:17:16Five Transformers join to create a Devastator.
0:17:16 > 0:17:18I didn't really want to know.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21- Could come up in a pub quiz. - You never know!
0:17:21 > 0:17:25- That's your real name, Christmas? - Yes.- And are you a father?
0:17:25 > 0:17:28I am a father. I see where this is going.
0:17:28 > 0:17:31You can, can't you? You're sharp like that.
0:17:31 > 0:17:36I've taken it my whole life, John. I didn't come on Mastermind to get picked on, all right?
0:17:36 > 0:17:37LAUGHTER
0:17:37 > 0:17:38Say something nice.
0:17:38 > 0:17:40LAUGHTER
0:17:40 > 0:17:43- Um, I like your shoes.- Thanks, mate.
0:17:43 > 0:17:48- Can we lift them so we can look at them?- There we go. They're bronze.
0:17:48 > 0:17:51That's because I'm aiming for third place.
0:17:51 > 0:17:54LAUGHTER
0:17:54 > 0:17:58So far, you're on course!
0:17:58 > 0:18:01All right, you've got 10 points.
0:18:01 > 0:18:06- And we'll see if you make it to third place.- Just do it, man!
0:18:06 > 0:18:09Don't worry about it. It's only a game, remember that.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11Ha!
0:18:11 > 0:18:14General Knowledge, here we go. Two minutes.
0:18:14 > 0:18:18Scaramouche, Beelzebub and Galileo were mentioned in which pop song by Queen?
0:18:18 > 0:18:20Bohemian Rhapsody.
0:18:20 > 0:18:22On which street are Big Bird and Oscar The Grouch?
0:18:22 > 0:18:23Sesame Street.
0:18:23 > 0:18:27In May 2004 which comedian's gravestone was finally engraved in Gaelic
0:18:27 > 0:18:31with his preferred epitaph, 'I told you I was ill'?
0:18:31 > 0:18:33- Bob Monkhouse. - Spike Milligan.
0:18:33 > 0:18:35In which Latin American dance of African origin
0:18:35 > 0:18:39do people form a snakelike chain and march in a 1-2-3-kick pattern?
0:18:39 > 0:18:42- Oh, what is it? The conga line.- Yes.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45In pantomime what name is given to the leading male role,
0:18:45 > 0:18:48traditionally played by a woman in tights?
0:18:48 > 0:18:52- Out of work actor. - Could be but principal boy is what I have here.
0:18:52 > 0:18:55Which region of Italy is referred to as Chianti-Shire
0:18:55 > 0:18:59because of its popularity with middle-class English holidaymakers and expats?
0:18:59 > 0:19:00Bologna?
0:19:00 > 0:19:04Tuscany. What was made by the Ancient Greek carpenter Epeius
0:19:04 > 0:19:06that ultimately led to the destruction of Troy?
0:19:06 > 0:19:08The wooden horse.
0:19:08 > 0:19:11In which 1979 film does the hero's mother say
0:19:11 > 0:19:14"He's not the Messiah. He's a very naughty boy!"
0:19:14 > 0:19:15Life Of Brian.
0:19:15 > 0:19:18In 2004 which song did the family of Johnny Cash
0:19:18 > 0:19:22stop from being used in an advert for a haemorrhoid relief cream? This is true.
0:19:22 > 0:19:26- Ring Of Fire.- Yes. I wish we hadn't had that question.
0:19:26 > 0:19:29Which chef has children called Poppy Honey Rosie,
0:19:29 > 0:19:33Daisy Boo Pamela, Petal Blossom Rainbow and Buddy Bear Maurice?
0:19:33 > 0:19:36- Um, Jamie Oliver?- Yes.
0:19:36 > 0:19:38In the English version of Tintin,
0:19:38 > 0:19:41what is the name of the hero's faithful white fox terrier?
0:19:41 > 0:19:43Oh, um, Snoopy.
0:19:43 > 0:19:48Snowy. What would you grind in your sleep if you suffered from bruxism?
0:19:48 > 0:19:52- Teeth?- Yes. In Cockney rhyming slang which singer's name is used for a curry?
0:19:52 > 0:19:54Oh, Beyonce, innit?
0:19:54 > 0:19:57No, it's not. It's Ruby Murray.
0:19:57 > 0:20:01Which former boxer when describing his fight against Earnie Shavers said,
0:20:01 > 0:20:05"He hit me so hard my kinsfolk in Africa shook"?
0:20:05 > 0:20:06Muhammad Ali.
0:20:06 > 0:20:10Of which Devon city was Francis Drake made mayor in 1581?
0:20:10 > 0:20:12Exeter.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15Plymouth. The computer that draws Premium Bond winners
0:20:15 > 0:20:17- is known by what acronym? - BEEP
0:20:17 > 0:20:20- Um...- It's not fair because you're from New Zealand.- I know!
0:20:20 > 0:20:23- Next question. Next question! - We've run out of time.
0:20:23 > 0:20:26- Can I have a guess?- Yes.
0:20:26 > 0:20:31Um, computer. Er, HAL?
0:20:31 > 0:20:37- No.- It's 2001 Space Odyssey. It was worth a shot.
0:20:37 > 0:20:40- It wasn't.- I've enjoyed this.- Good. - I'm happy to be here.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43- It was ERNIE, by the way. - ERNIE! Aiming for bronze.
0:20:43 > 0:20:45LAUGHTER
0:20:45 > 0:20:49Well, 19 points. It's possible.
0:20:49 > 0:20:51APPLAUSE
0:20:55 > 0:20:57And now Karen again, please.
0:20:57 > 0:21:03Yes, you've got 14 points already so you're well on the way.
0:21:03 > 0:21:06You describe yourself as a comedian, an actress.
0:21:06 > 0:21:09- What's the most hard work? - Definitely stand-up.
0:21:09 > 0:21:13I haven't done it for 10 years. No-one does your hair or make-up.
0:21:13 > 0:21:17You've got to get there. Nine people look at you, not laughing.
0:21:17 > 0:21:22- It's not very nice.- No.- Don't do it, John.- I wasn't planning on.
0:21:22 > 0:21:24Too late for a change in career anyway.
0:21:24 > 0:21:28- You're very funny. Look at that face. - I'm not meant to be!
0:21:28 > 0:21:30LAUGHTER
0:21:30 > 0:21:33- I'm meant to be very serious. - Sorry.- That's quite all right.
0:21:33 > 0:21:39So being an actor, you've got great teams of people ministering to your every need.
0:21:39 > 0:21:43- Caravans of servants and people just looking after you.- Yes.
0:21:43 > 0:21:48- Several people doing everything. - None of that's true, is it?- No!
0:21:48 > 0:21:52- Let's get on with the serious bit. This is a serious programme. - I don't like this.
0:21:52 > 0:21:5714 points so far. General Knowledge coming up. Tough stuff.
0:21:57 > 0:22:00Cockney rhyming slang, what are you doing if you are having a giraffe?
0:22:00 > 0:22:01Laugh.
0:22:01 > 0:22:04Colin Firth came to public attention when he played
0:22:04 > 0:22:07which part in the 1995 adaptation of Pride And Prejudice?
0:22:07 > 0:22:08Mr Darcy.
0:22:08 > 0:22:10Charles de Gaulle said of France,
0:22:10 > 0:22:14"How can you govern a country that has 246 varieties of..."?
0:22:14 > 0:22:15Cheese.
0:22:15 > 0:22:18What name is given to the cavity surrounding a hair root?
0:22:18 > 0:22:19Follicle.
0:22:19 > 0:22:23Comedy Dave is the sidekick of which Radio One presenter?
0:22:23 > 0:22:29Comedy Dave. Oh, that... I nearly swore! Chris fat person.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31That'll do. Chris Moyles.
0:22:31 > 0:22:33The businessman James Goldsmith once said,
0:22:33 > 0:22:36"A man who marries his mistress creates..." What?
0:22:36 > 0:22:37Can you say that again?
0:22:37 > 0:22:41James Goldsmith once said, "A man who marries his mistress creates..."
0:22:41 > 0:22:45- A wife?- A job vacancy.- Oh. - He thought it was funny.
0:22:45 > 0:22:49Members of which London club named after an 18th-century actor
0:22:49 > 0:22:52wear a salmon pink and cucumber striped tie?
0:22:52 > 0:22:55- Groucho Club.- Close. The Garrick.
0:22:55 > 0:22:57Which American city's luxury hotels include
0:22:57 > 0:23:00The Bellagio, Caesar's Palace and The Venetian?
0:23:00 > 0:23:02- Los Angeles?- Las Vegas, you were close.
0:23:02 > 0:23:06What term was used in the early 70s by Women's Wear Daily to describe
0:23:06 > 0:23:09the shorts that were the height of women's fashion?
0:23:09 > 0:23:10Hotpants.
0:23:10 > 0:23:14Which stage and film musical features the song You've Got To Pick A Pocket Or Two?
0:23:14 > 0:23:15Oliver!
0:23:15 > 0:23:17What type of bicycle did Boris Johnson
0:23:17 > 0:23:19give to William and Kate as a wedding present?
0:23:19 > 0:23:22One of those Boris bikes?
0:23:22 > 0:23:26- No, a tandem.- It might have been funny if it was a Boris bike.
0:23:26 > 0:23:29In July a piece of art in Bristol called Gorilla In A Pink Mask
0:23:29 > 0:23:32was painted over when the building it was on
0:23:32 > 0:23:36was turned into a cultural centre. Which artist created that piece?
0:23:36 > 0:23:37Banksy.
0:23:37 > 0:23:40The works of which American thriller writer include
0:23:40 > 0:23:45Kiss The Girls and Along Came A Spider featuring criminal psychologist Alex Cross?
0:23:45 > 0:23:48- Stephen King.- James Patterson.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51What name is used for a man that turns into a wolf at night,
0:23:51 > 0:23:54sometimes under the influence of a full moon?
0:23:54 > 0:23:56Hugh Jackman.
0:23:56 > 0:23:57LAUGHTER
0:23:57 > 0:24:01- That's better than the answer I've got, werewolf. - BEEP
0:24:01 > 0:24:04You now have a total of 22 points.
0:24:04 > 0:24:06APPLAUSE
0:24:14 > 0:24:17And finally Russell Kane, please.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19Don't mess it up!
0:24:19 > 0:24:2318 points already. That's serious Mastermind stuff.
0:24:23 > 0:24:25I'm rubbish at general knowledge so I'm worried.
0:24:25 > 0:24:29We're about to find out. You've been a stand-up for a while.
0:24:29 > 0:24:33- I only left work in 2006. I left my proper job.- Which was?
0:24:33 > 0:24:37- I worked in a marketing office doing less glamorous stuff.- Boring?
0:24:37 > 0:24:41Win a flight with this chocolate bar. That was one of mine.
0:24:41 > 0:24:44- Was it? Win a flight? - Stuff like that.
0:24:44 > 0:24:47Creativity was limited in the stuff I could come up with.
0:24:47 > 0:24:52That's when I started writing stories and I was having no luck. Someone said I should try stand-up.
0:24:52 > 0:24:57I knew nothing about it, so I did it for a dare like a bungee jump and I fell into it, really.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59I wasn't interested in it.
0:24:59 > 0:25:03But that first one, when you did it, it must've been horrible?
0:25:03 > 0:25:07Yeah. Three packs of Imodium did nothing. Let's just say that.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10My hands were shaking, but there was just a laugh in the middle
0:25:10 > 0:25:14and it was like being shot with some sort of emotional drug or something.
0:25:14 > 0:25:17I thought, "That felt weird" and inside me, I didn't know,
0:25:17 > 0:25:22was this little narcissistic, egocentric, attention-seeking gremlin
0:25:22 > 0:25:25and it likes to come out to play three times a week now. Minimum.
0:25:25 > 0:25:28Then I started to think about my father, and it was...
0:25:28 > 0:25:30LAUGHTER
0:25:32 > 0:25:36Right. You got 18 points, which is extraordinary for the first round
0:25:36 > 0:25:41in any Mastermind, but let's see how you do with your general knowledge. Here we go, starting now.
0:25:41 > 0:25:43Which sandwich filling is often known as a BLT?
0:25:43 > 0:25:45Bacon lettuce and tomato.
0:25:45 > 0:25:47Yes. In 2005, Peter Kay topped the UK charts
0:25:47 > 0:25:50with which Tony Christie hit for Comic Relief?
0:25:50 > 0:25:53The video featured Ronnie Corbett, among others.
0:25:53 > 0:25:54The Road To Amarillo?
0:25:54 > 0:25:56Yes. Who or what is Larry,
0:25:56 > 0:25:58who was brought into 10 Downing Street
0:25:58 > 0:26:01- in February 2011 to deal with the rodent problem?- A cat.
0:26:01 > 0:26:04Yes. At which theatre is the Royal Variety Performance held
0:26:04 > 0:26:05when it is staged in London?
0:26:05 > 0:26:07- Royal Albert Hall? - The London Palladium!
0:26:07 > 0:26:09What was Gladys Knight's backing group?
0:26:09 > 0:26:11The Pips?
0:26:11 > 0:26:13Yep. Which German rye bread has a name
0:26:13 > 0:26:15thought to originally mean lout or stinker
0:26:15 > 0:26:18- because of it's notoriety for causing flatulence?- Pass.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21Jack Dee succeeded Humphrey Lyttelton
0:26:21 > 0:26:22as the permanent presenter
0:26:22 > 0:26:25- of which Radio 4 game show? - I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue?
0:26:25 > 0:26:27Yeah, but tell me anyway.
0:26:27 > 0:26:30Which firework also known as a pinwheel
0:26:30 > 0:26:31rotates while burning?
0:26:31 > 0:26:32Catherine wheel.
0:26:32 > 0:26:33What's the name
0:26:33 > 0:26:35for the distortion of the outer ear,
0:26:35 > 0:26:37found in rugby players, boxers and wrestlers?
0:26:37 > 0:26:39Cauliflower ear.
0:26:39 > 0:26:42Which political party's senior officials and election candidates
0:26:42 > 0:26:45have included Baron von Thunderclap and Mr RU Serious?
0:26:45 > 0:26:48The Monster Raving Loony Party?
0:26:48 > 0:26:52Which children's Viking tale features Eskimo bride Nooka, the Mighty Thor Nogson,
0:26:52 > 0:26:56Olaf the Lofty and a weird bird called a Graculus?
0:26:56 > 0:26:59- Asterix. - Close. Noggin the Nog.
0:26:59 > 0:27:01What name is given to the large number of islands
0:27:01 > 0:27:03and islets off the west coast of Scotland,
0:27:03 > 0:27:06- divided into subgroups known as inner and outer?- Hebrides.
0:27:06 > 0:27:09Which member of Frank Sinatra's Ratpack said,
0:27:09 > 0:27:12"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
0:27:12 > 0:27:14Dean Martin?
0:27:14 > 0:27:17Which monarch received a musical bustle for her Golden Jubilee?
0:27:17 > 0:27:20It played the National Anthem when she sat down.
0:27:20 > 0:27:22Queen Victoria?
0:27:22 > 0:27:27Whose performance in the film Bridesmaids made him the subject of marriage proposals on Twitter?
0:27:27 > 0:27:28Can't remember. Pass.
0:27:28 > 0:27:31Which Manchester United defender retired in February 2011
0:27:31 > 0:27:36after making 602 appearances for the club?
0:27:36 > 0:27:37Rio Ferdinand.
0:27:37 > 0:27:39Gary Neville. Henry Morton Stanley
0:27:39 > 0:27:42has just one entry in the Oxford Dictionary of Quotations.
0:27:42 > 0:27:45It was uttered in Africa in 1871 and it was?
0:27:45 > 0:27:47Kiss me?
0:27:47 > 0:27:50LAUGHTER
0:27:50 > 0:27:52- No. I don't think so. - I don't know.
0:27:52 > 0:27:54"Dr Livingstone, I presume."
0:27:54 > 0:27:56It wouldn't have sounded quite the same.
0:27:56 > 0:28:02- I was thinking of, "Kiss me, Hardy." - You had two passes. Chris O'Dowd was in the Bridesmaids
0:28:02 > 0:28:04and that disgusting bread is pumpernickel.
0:28:04 > 0:28:09But look, your score...29 points.
0:28:09 > 0:28:11APPLAUSE
0:28:18 > 0:28:20What a winner. Worthy of the real Mastermind.
0:28:20 > 0:28:23Let's have a look at the scores.
0:28:23 > 0:28:26In fourth place with 17 points, Imran Yusuf.
0:28:26 > 0:28:29Third place, he got his bronze, 19 points, Jarrod Christmas.
0:28:29 > 0:28:31Second place, 22 points, Karen Taylor.
0:28:31 > 0:28:34First place with 29 points, Russell Kane!
0:28:38 > 0:28:41- Well done, mate.- Argh! He hit me!
0:28:46 > 0:28:47Russell.
0:28:49 > 0:28:51- What about that? - Thank you very much. Thank you.
0:28:51 > 0:28:53CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:28:53 > 0:28:55So where are you going to put it?
0:28:55 > 0:28:59I'll put it on the shelf, if I can make space.
0:28:59 > 0:29:01LAUGHTER
0:29:01 > 0:29:05With all the other trophies and awards. Well done.
0:29:05 > 0:29:08A noble winner, a worthy winner.
0:29:08 > 0:29:12Do remember, next week on BBC One on Friday - Children In Need.
0:29:12 > 0:29:16Do tune in to watch that, and you can start making donations now
0:29:16 > 0:29:19and here is the address at the bottom of the screen.
0:29:19 > 0:29:21Thanks for watching. Goodnight.
0:29:47 > 0:29:50Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:29:50 > 0:29:53E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk