0:00:02 > 0:00:04One rule - touch the prize, win the prize.
0:00:07 > 0:00:09But doing that takes a whole load of this.
0:00:09 > 0:00:12KLAXON DISTORTED HOLLERING
0:00:14 > 0:00:16A ridiculous amount of this.
0:00:16 > 0:00:17Yargh!
0:00:21 > 0:00:22And absolutely masses of this.
0:00:25 > 0:00:26MAN SCREAMS
0:00:30 > 0:00:32HE PANTS
0:00:32 > 0:00:34- This is...Can't... - Can't Touch This.
0:00:34 > 0:00:35One day I'll get it.
0:00:35 > 0:00:38It's the Best Of And Unseen, actually.
0:00:56 > 0:01:02Hello and welcome to the Best Of And Unseen Can't Touch This.
0:01:02 > 0:01:03My name's Sue Perkins
0:01:03 > 0:01:08and tonight I'll be guiding you through the oohs...
0:01:08 > 0:01:11the ahhs...and the - Ohh, hello!
0:01:11 > 0:01:13Oh, I really want to give him a wedgie.
0:01:13 > 0:01:15For this year's Can't Touch This,
0:01:15 > 0:01:17We shot ten episodes on this gigantic set
0:01:17 > 0:01:20in Belfast's Titanic shipyards.
0:01:20 > 0:01:21Where else?
0:01:21 > 0:01:24Over 150 people competed in the show,
0:01:24 > 0:01:26some of them are still alive today.
0:01:27 > 0:01:30They're all shapes, sizes and age groups.
0:01:30 > 0:01:33We've had 'em all.
0:01:33 > 0:01:34The winkers...
0:01:38 > 0:01:39..the kissers...
0:01:42 > 0:01:43..the scaredy-cats...
0:01:46 > 0:01:48..and Mr Burns.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51They all had one thing in common -
0:01:51 > 0:01:54- they all thoroughly enjoyed themselves.- It was scary!
0:01:54 > 0:01:57- Brutal from start to finish. - Painful.- Dreadful.- Ridiculous!
0:01:57 > 0:02:01- Dreadful.- My God! That was so hard! - My bones are on fire.
0:02:01 > 0:02:02Bucket list - tick - don't do again.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04SHE SIGHS HEAVILY
0:02:05 > 0:02:08And where to start this epic adventure?
0:02:08 > 0:02:10Well, right at the beginning, of course,
0:02:10 > 0:02:12with our first official contestant.
0:02:17 > 0:02:22Remember Stewart, the retired businessman from Lisburn? He's 62.
0:02:22 > 0:02:23He's 62!
0:02:23 > 0:02:26Stewart, you gave up work so you could travel the world.
0:02:26 > 0:02:27You've been to 74 countries.
0:02:27 > 0:02:30How are you going to travel the course today, do you think?
0:02:30 > 0:02:32With great difficulty, I would imagine,
0:02:32 > 0:02:34but I'll certainly go down with all guns blazing.
0:02:34 > 0:02:38Yes, it's a walking stick. We've been through this.
0:02:38 > 0:02:44We stuck a 62-year-old man who uses a walking stick in a human catapult.
0:02:44 > 0:02:48I think it would have been rude not to - age discriminatory.
0:02:48 > 0:02:49STEWART SCREAMS
0:02:49 > 0:02:51DISTORTED SCREAMING
0:02:52 > 0:02:55MUSIC: Lust For Life by Iggy Pop
0:02:56 > 0:03:00Well, he's out of the foam and off to the Travelator.
0:03:00 > 0:03:02- He looks good.- He's incredibly fit for his age.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04No walking stick now.
0:03:07 > 0:03:09Ohh! Is he up?
0:03:09 > 0:03:11STEWART SCREAMS ASHLEY LAUGHS
0:03:11 > 0:03:15The first touch point - back to robotic vacuum cleaner.
0:03:15 > 0:03:19So Stewart can finally clean his robotic vacuums.
0:03:20 > 0:03:24The next touch point was for a trip to Barcelona.
0:03:27 > 0:03:29- Argh!- Stewart!
0:03:29 > 0:03:31LAUGHTER
0:03:34 > 0:03:36Argh!
0:03:37 > 0:03:39Amazing!
0:03:40 > 0:03:42# I like to move it, move it!
0:03:42 > 0:03:44- # You like to... - Move it! #
0:03:44 > 0:03:46You all right, Stu?
0:03:46 > 0:03:48All Stewart had to do was stack the blocks up
0:03:48 > 0:03:51to the next touch point to bank a 3D printer.
0:03:51 > 0:03:53A lot of people are looking at him there with his walking stick
0:03:53 > 0:03:57and you may have made assumptions. Well, hope we proved you wrong.
0:03:59 > 0:04:01I'm going to hit that.
0:04:01 > 0:04:04Stewart was going on for years about how he wanted that 3D printer.
0:04:04 > 0:04:08Now he can print himself some new hips.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10Off to the Wall Of DOOM!
0:04:12 > 0:04:16Well, we could have tried a little harder with that name, to be fair.
0:04:16 > 0:04:19- Argh!- Look at him! He's like a teenage Brucie.
0:04:19 > 0:04:22Nice to see you. Not so nice, however, to see this.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24SUE GASPS The Pole Vault!
0:04:27 > 0:04:29Do you know, I don't actually know I can watch this again.
0:04:29 > 0:04:31Or...maybe I can.
0:04:31 > 0:04:34- Right, no chance.- No chance.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38STEWART SCREAMS
0:04:38 > 0:04:39STEPTOE AND SON THEME PLAYS
0:04:41 > 0:04:43Grey splash. STEWART WHIMPERS
0:04:46 > 0:04:47HE GASPS
0:04:47 > 0:04:52- How you doing, Stewart?- It's cold! - Yeah, a bit cold.- Sorry about that.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55Off to the Beam now for a satnav.
0:04:55 > 0:05:00And by beam, I mean those five very heavy punch bags.
0:05:01 > 0:05:05We've put the touch point just beneath the beam - course we did.
0:05:05 > 0:05:10Stewart's employing the Steptoe technique there. Very good thinking.
0:05:10 > 0:05:14- Straight past three! - And he's banked it!
0:05:14 > 0:05:16Argh!
0:05:16 > 0:05:18- Ohh!- No!- He's off!
0:05:18 > 0:05:20Argh!
0:05:20 > 0:05:24- Gutted!- Check out Stewart setting the standard for the series.
0:05:30 > 0:05:32Finally, the Slide.
0:05:32 > 0:05:34The two swinging touch points at the bottom
0:05:34 > 0:05:38bank a smoothie maker and Bluetooth speakers. Imagine the parties!
0:05:38 > 0:05:41- Oh, he's missed it!- Argh!
0:05:41 > 0:05:42MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE THEME PLAYS
0:05:44 > 0:05:46But he's stopped the clock and banked the pan set.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49You are brilliant.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51How are you feeling? Are you a little bit worse for wear?
0:05:51 > 0:05:54- How do I look?- Well, a little bit wet, a little bit tired.
0:05:54 > 0:05:57I applied for this show 40 years ago.
0:05:57 > 0:06:00I can tell you, I'll never go near a second-class stamp again.
0:06:00 > 0:06:02ASHLEY LAUGHS
0:06:02 > 0:06:04Oh, Stewart, I thoroughly enjoyed that.
0:06:04 > 0:06:06STEWART SCREAMS
0:06:06 > 0:06:08I think my favourite bit was the Catapult.
0:06:08 > 0:06:10# Come fly with me. #
0:06:10 > 0:06:13Think of your favourite BBC shows - Fawlty Towers, Dad's Army,
0:06:13 > 0:06:15Only Fools And Horses.
0:06:15 > 0:06:18What do they have in common? They all start with a catapult.
0:06:19 > 0:06:21SCREAMING
0:06:21 > 0:06:24- What was your favourite bit? - Erm, the catapult, actually.
0:06:24 > 0:06:26- The catapult was great.- Do you know, I didn't mind the catapult.
0:06:26 > 0:06:30- You didn't mind the catapult? - I was petrified of that, but it was actually quite good.
0:06:30 > 0:06:32This is Eddie.
0:06:32 > 0:06:35It turned out Eddie hadn't been fired out of a catapult before,
0:06:35 > 0:06:37but he made it look easy.
0:06:37 > 0:06:38KLAXON
0:06:38 > 0:06:41- Ready Eddie.- BOTH:- Ohh!
0:06:41 > 0:06:44- Is he going to come up smiling? - Is he going to come up?
0:06:44 > 0:06:47- That's a good point. - LAUGHTER
0:06:47 > 0:06:49While Eddie is flailing in polystyrene,
0:06:49 > 0:06:52what say we have a look at some other catapult techniques?
0:06:52 > 0:06:54We had the screamers.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57HE SCREAMS SHE SCREAMS
0:06:57 > 0:06:59DANGER MOUSE THEME PLAYS
0:07:00 > 0:07:03- That was a big scream.- Good scream!
0:07:03 > 0:07:05We had the shape makers.
0:07:06 > 0:07:10- That was a star jump! - Oh, a Superman entrance there.
0:07:10 > 0:07:13- He means business. - Just get him a little cape.
0:07:13 > 0:07:15HE HOLLERS
0:07:15 > 0:07:19- That's up there in my top five favourite catapult entrances. - Definitely.
0:07:19 > 0:07:21He stayed seated the whole way.
0:07:21 > 0:07:23Meanwhile, Eddie is still in the foam.
0:07:23 > 0:07:26And we have the neck breakers.
0:07:27 > 0:07:31- Ow!- Which was our lawyer's least favourite technique.
0:07:34 > 0:07:36And quick update - Eddie is still in the foam.
0:07:36 > 0:07:40- Help!- It's not even really part of the game, it's sort of just foam.
0:07:40 > 0:07:42But it did prove a bit of a challenge for some of you,
0:07:42 > 0:07:44so welcome to...
0:07:47 > 0:07:49Montage is coming.
0:07:49 > 0:07:51This is House of Maria.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53KLAXON
0:07:53 > 0:07:55SHE SCREAMS
0:07:56 > 0:07:58Go on, chuck the pieces, Maria.
0:07:58 > 0:08:00She's definitely there.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02This is noble House of Alan. KLAXON
0:08:04 > 0:08:06- Alan?- Alan!
0:08:06 > 0:08:08- BOTH:- Alan? - SHE SCREAMS
0:08:08 > 0:08:11And this is just Tasha.
0:08:11 > 0:08:14God, it's like being stuck in straw.
0:08:14 > 0:08:17Yeah, you know, like being stuck in straw.
0:08:17 > 0:08:20Er, best technique should you ever find yourself in foam
0:08:20 > 0:08:23is to get one of our researchers to pull you out
0:08:23 > 0:08:25using a door they kicked off earlier.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27Oh, there's nothing more embarrassing
0:08:27 > 0:08:29than being stuck in foam.
0:08:29 > 0:08:31- Ah!- Ohh!
0:08:31 > 0:08:34# Oh, yeah! #
0:08:34 > 0:08:36BOTH LAUGH
0:08:41 > 0:08:43Brilliant!
0:08:43 > 0:08:44Yes, Eddie!
0:08:44 > 0:08:47Don't worry, love, you weren't the only one
0:08:47 > 0:08:49to have a wardrobe malfunction.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51There was Gareth.
0:08:51 > 0:08:53- I do love his shorts.- So do I.
0:08:53 > 0:08:56I think they may be a size too small.
0:08:56 > 0:08:57SHE LAUGHS
0:08:58 > 0:09:02My advice would be, when you take on a giant obstacle course,
0:09:02 > 0:09:05put a little thought into what you will wear on your bottom half.
0:09:05 > 0:09:07Don't make them too tight.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10SHE WHIMPERS Or too lose.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13And white can be problematic when wet.
0:09:13 > 0:09:17- Oh, white see-through shorts.- Ohh!
0:09:17 > 0:09:20- How exciting.- Michael!
0:09:20 > 0:09:22And here's an important fashion tip -
0:09:22 > 0:09:25tuck your T-shirt in when you're on BBC One.
0:09:27 > 0:09:30I'm looking at you, Tony.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36- Come and have a chat. - And you, Alexander.
0:09:36 > 0:09:38Isn't that right, Eddie? Oh!
0:09:43 > 0:09:46Before we let our contestants onto the course,
0:09:46 > 0:09:48we had to rigorously test it with...
0:09:48 > 0:09:51other contestants.
0:09:51 > 0:09:52This is Naomi.
0:09:52 > 0:09:57She was one of the contestants in our never-seen-before pilot episode.
0:09:57 > 0:09:59I've been told that you are so competitive,
0:09:59 > 0:10:02you call yourself The Terminator.
0:10:02 > 0:10:06Can you guarantee then after this round one that you will be back?
0:10:06 > 0:10:08- DISTORTED:- Oh, I will be back, Zoe.
0:10:12 > 0:10:15So, can Naomi terminate the Travelator?
0:10:15 > 0:10:17KLAXON
0:10:18 > 0:10:21- Let's go. Oh, she's over straightaway.- That's quite...
0:10:21 > 0:10:25No. No, I don't think you're supposed to get terminators wet.
0:10:25 > 0:10:28Something to do with wiring... or was it Gremlins?
0:10:31 > 0:10:32Stack 'Em High.
0:10:32 > 0:10:35MIMICS ARNIE: Come with me if you want to bank a tablet.
0:10:35 > 0:10:38- Don't know where he was from. - I don't think I can look.
0:10:38 > 0:10:41Is she going to bank the prize?
0:10:41 > 0:10:42- BOTH:- Yes!
0:10:42 > 0:10:46Now, the Terminator versus the pole.
0:10:46 > 0:10:49One of the weaker reboots, if you ask me.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51- BOTH:- Oh!
0:10:51 > 0:10:53Hasta la vista, Naomi.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59Now tell me, just how difficult did you find that?
0:10:59 > 0:11:01SHE WHIMPERS
0:11:03 > 0:11:07Steady now. The future of the future is at stake.
0:11:07 > 0:11:09Don't forget the touch point. Watch those bags.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12Oh, and the Beam claims Naomi.
0:11:14 > 0:11:17Now, hang on, is this not the point in the movie
0:11:17 > 0:11:19where her future self beams back and saves her?
0:11:22 > 0:11:26Now for the iconic Terminator water-slide scene.
0:11:28 > 0:11:32Naomi got round the course in... after penalties.
0:11:32 > 0:11:33KLAXON
0:11:33 > 0:11:36- That takes everything. Oh, my God! - Yes.
0:11:36 > 0:11:39You look like you were putting everything into that.
0:11:39 > 0:11:42- But it was so much fun.- Oh, well done, Naomi.- Thank you.- Well done.
0:11:46 > 0:11:48Unlike the Terminator, Naomi never did come back,
0:11:48 > 0:11:50probably too afraid of the Travelator.
0:11:50 > 0:11:53And she wasn't the only one.
0:11:53 > 0:11:55In fact, the Travelator was the single most
0:11:55 > 0:11:58complained-about obstacle in Can't Touch This.
0:12:00 > 0:12:04- The Travelator was not kind to you today.- It was horrible.
0:12:04 > 0:12:06- Not quite tall enough. - I know.- I banged my face.
0:12:10 > 0:12:14As long as I don't fall flat on my face, I'm sure it'll be good.
0:12:17 > 0:12:20Lots of people get up close and personal with the Travelator.
0:12:20 > 0:12:23Including Kirsty.
0:12:23 > 0:12:25- Ohh!- Oh!
0:12:25 > 0:12:27Bit cheeky.
0:12:29 > 0:12:31As if getting knocked in the face wasn't enough.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36You hit the water for the first time,
0:12:36 > 0:12:37it just knocks the air out of you
0:12:37 > 0:12:39I was looking for a drink to start with,
0:12:39 > 0:12:41but I didn't mean one like that.
0:12:45 > 0:12:48And I wouldn't describe that water as warm,
0:12:48 > 0:12:50as TV's Ashley Banjo found out.
0:12:50 > 0:12:52Oh, that's freezing!
0:12:52 > 0:12:54BOTH HOLLER
0:12:54 > 0:12:56- You know what?- Ashley!
0:12:56 > 0:12:58- Oh, Maria!- You're dead, mate!
0:12:58 > 0:12:59Cheers, love.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02- What was the toughest part? - Probably the Travelator.
0:13:02 > 0:13:05- It tires you out for the rest of the course.- Cheers, Mike.- Sorry.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07LAUGHTER
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Why is it always me?!
0:13:10 > 0:13:13- Look at that. Look.- First thing they teach in presenter school -
0:13:13 > 0:13:16don't work with animals, children or freezing cold pools.
0:13:16 > 0:13:18It's always me!
0:13:22 > 0:13:23Meet Mo -
0:13:23 > 0:13:27the second of our contestants from the never-seen-before pilot.
0:13:27 > 0:13:29A retired maths teacher from Somerset
0:13:29 > 0:13:31who breathes and eats fire,
0:13:31 > 0:13:34because they don't have air and crisps in the West Country.
0:13:34 > 0:13:38I know you used to teach maths, but have you done any calculations
0:13:38 > 0:13:39for the Can't Touch This course?
0:13:39 > 0:13:42I read a lot about trigonometry, angle of elevation,
0:13:42 > 0:13:43angle of depression.
0:13:43 > 0:13:45I think he might be overthinking this.
0:13:45 > 0:13:49Motion, velocity. And I will walk this course just like an Egyptian.
0:13:49 > 0:13:52Just like an Egyptian? That's what I like to see.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55Good old Mo, he's even picked his very own theme tune.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57Start the clock. KLAXON
0:13:57 > 0:13:59OK, let's go, Mo.
0:13:59 > 0:14:01In your own time.
0:14:01 > 0:14:03Glad this isn't live.
0:14:03 > 0:14:05Come on, Mo!
0:14:05 > 0:14:06And he's up.
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Oh, and he's down again. We base this system
0:14:08 > 0:14:11on the way the baggage is treated at Luton airport.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13And he's wet! Gone in the drink!
0:14:15 > 0:14:17Let's have another look at that.
0:14:17 > 0:14:18Geroni...! Oh!
0:14:19 > 0:14:21Come on, Mo.
0:14:21 > 0:14:24This is for the trip to New York, so it's really worth making an effort.
0:14:26 > 0:14:30Or just move on. Yeah, he's just going to move on there. Yeah.
0:14:30 > 0:14:32So now we're onto Stack 'Em High.
0:14:32 > 0:14:34Now, this should be right up Mo's street.
0:14:34 > 0:14:36All about pie, like cake.
0:14:36 > 0:14:38Bake! Sorry, force of habit.
0:14:38 > 0:14:40- Come on, Mo!- Come on, Mo!- Do this.
0:14:43 > 0:14:45Don't try this at home, kids, unless your parents are out,
0:14:45 > 0:14:48then just give it a go.
0:14:48 > 0:14:51Beautifully done, Mo. Nonchalant, some might say.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53- BOTH:- Oh!
0:14:53 > 0:14:56- Nice one! Yeah!- Nice one!
0:14:56 > 0:14:58Then it's on to the Pole Vault -
0:14:58 > 0:15:01an unstable, gigantic, slippery metal rod
0:15:01 > 0:15:04suspended high above a shallow pool.
0:15:04 > 0:15:07Oh, don't worry, Mo, what's the worst that could happen?
0:15:09 > 0:15:11Ow!
0:15:11 > 0:15:12Urgh!
0:15:12 > 0:15:14He won't be walking like an Egyptian for a very long while,
0:15:14 > 0:15:18but now he can sing like a Bee Gee - swings and roundabouts, my friend.
0:15:18 > 0:15:20- Ow! - ZOE LAUGHS
0:15:20 > 0:15:24Time for the Beam. All Mo has to do is stay on it.
0:15:24 > 0:15:27Just doing some intense mathematical calculations.
0:15:27 > 0:15:29And they failed him, so there he goes into the foam.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32Can we have a slow-mo for...Mo?
0:15:32 > 0:15:35God, I...I do earn my money.
0:15:35 > 0:15:37And, finally, it's the Slide.
0:15:37 > 0:15:39All Mo has to do is solve a simultaneous equation
0:15:39 > 0:15:42involving friction, motion and height.
0:15:42 > 0:15:46This one's impossible to get wrong because...well, it's a slide.
0:15:46 > 0:15:47He got it wrong.
0:15:47 > 0:15:49We add four 30-second penalties to his time,
0:15:49 > 0:15:51giving him a grand total of...
0:15:53 > 0:15:55Tell me about the Pole Vault?
0:15:55 > 0:15:58- MO SIGHS - My voice changed!
0:15:58 > 0:15:59BOTH LAUGH
0:15:59 > 0:16:01I start to sound like a chicken.
0:16:01 > 0:16:03BOTH LAUGH
0:16:03 > 0:16:05- My wife won't be happy!- She will.
0:16:09 > 0:16:11Oh, well done, Mo.
0:16:11 > 0:16:15We've already seen Stewart, but there was also grandad Anthony.
0:16:15 > 0:16:16What do your six grandchildren
0:16:16 > 0:16:19think of you doing something as crazy as this?
0:16:19 > 0:16:20They think I'm going to come and win
0:16:20 > 0:16:22and, of course, I'm going to try and prove 'em right.
0:16:22 > 0:16:26- Donna.- I'm one of those, I'm afraid. - Yeah?- All the gear, no idea.
0:16:26 > 0:16:31- Sheila.- I shall try and maintain my dignity and royal decorum.
0:16:31 > 0:16:33And Dale. HE YODELS
0:16:35 > 0:16:37Anthony at the Travelator.
0:16:37 > 0:16:38THUDDING
0:16:38 > 0:16:41Oh, that sound is going to stay with me.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43You all right, Anthony?
0:16:43 > 0:16:45Yeah, he's fine!
0:16:45 > 0:16:49Donna has five grandkids.
0:16:49 > 0:16:51Ohh!
0:16:52 > 0:16:54So slippy!
0:16:54 > 0:16:56Come on, Sheila.
0:16:57 > 0:16:59SHEILA SCREAMS
0:16:59 > 0:17:02What was that about dignity, again, Sheila?
0:17:02 > 0:17:03LAUGHTER
0:17:03 > 0:17:05Whoo-hoo!
0:17:05 > 0:17:07Bigger bit. Use a bigger bit, Dale.
0:17:07 > 0:17:09- SHE SIGHS - I can't look.
0:17:09 > 0:17:11Argh!
0:17:11 > 0:17:13Man down! ASHLEY LAUGHS
0:17:13 > 0:17:16Is she going to go up the third step?
0:17:16 > 0:17:18I don't want her to. I don't want her to do it.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21See, part of me does,
0:17:21 > 0:17:23cos I really want her to bank those headphones.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26Sheila, you're the same height, you're still standing on the...
0:17:26 > 0:17:29- She's done it!- She did it! - She proved him wrong!
0:17:29 > 0:17:31She banked the headphones.
0:17:31 > 0:17:33Go, Sheila!
0:17:33 > 0:17:35Ohh!
0:17:35 > 0:17:37LAUGHTER
0:17:39 > 0:17:41- I'm all right.- You may be all right, Anthony,
0:17:41 > 0:17:44but let's see how everyone else got on with Stack 'Em High.
0:17:44 > 0:17:46I mean, it's easy, right?
0:17:46 > 0:17:48It like a child's soft-play area.
0:17:48 > 0:17:50Stack 'em high and touch the touch point.
0:17:50 > 0:17:55Like that. And yet some people just couldn't master it.
0:17:55 > 0:17:56Remember T?
0:17:56 > 0:17:59MUSIC: Build Me Up Buttercup by The Foundations
0:17:59 > 0:18:02To be fair, T was of small height,
0:18:02 > 0:18:04but Mark wasn't.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10And neither was Amy.
0:18:10 > 0:18:11Ohh!
0:18:11 > 0:18:12AMY SCREAMS
0:18:12 > 0:18:13Ohh!
0:18:13 > 0:18:16Getting up there was only half the battle.
0:18:17 > 0:18:19- Ohh!- Back to the drawing board.
0:18:21 > 0:18:23Argh!
0:18:23 > 0:18:25LAUGHTER
0:18:25 > 0:18:28- All gave some.- Hey!
0:18:28 > 0:18:31- Some gave all.- Ohh!
0:18:31 > 0:18:33But then they all hit the wall.
0:18:34 > 0:18:38Much like the foam, the wall wasn't supposed to be an obstacle,
0:18:38 > 0:18:40but try telling them that.
0:18:40 > 0:18:42- They can move separately. - Two pieces.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45Take Tasha, for instance.
0:18:45 > 0:18:46It's the balancing act
0:18:46 > 0:18:49and then trying to get your leg up gracefully.
0:18:49 > 0:18:51The blocks will separate.
0:18:51 > 0:18:52Oh, help! Help!
0:18:52 > 0:18:55- No.- T didn't have any better luck.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58It is almost going to be time for tea at the end of this.
0:18:58 > 0:19:01But we did say get stuck in.
0:19:01 > 0:19:03Like Sophie.
0:19:05 > 0:19:08- Ohh!- And Hera.
0:19:10 > 0:19:12- BOTH:- Ohh!
0:19:12 > 0:19:15- Ohh!- We all remember Andrea.
0:19:16 > 0:19:17Ohh!
0:19:17 > 0:19:19- Oh!- Whoo!
0:19:19 > 0:19:22And Maria.
0:19:22 > 0:19:24Oh!
0:19:24 > 0:19:26- It is horrible. - ZOE SIGHS
0:19:28 > 0:19:29ZOE GASPS
0:19:29 > 0:19:32The problem is that she is where the block should be, so...
0:19:32 > 0:19:34she can't get it round.
0:19:34 > 0:19:39101 ways to not get over the wall to the Pole Vault by Tasha.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41BOTH LAUGH
0:19:41 > 0:19:44Oh, no. I don't like the look of that. That's madness!
0:19:44 > 0:19:47- Careful.- That's madness! No! No!
0:19:51 > 0:19:53DRUMROLL
0:19:53 > 0:19:55- Quick, quick, quick. Yes!- Yes!
0:19:55 > 0:19:58Success. BOTH LAUGH
0:19:58 > 0:20:02Except for Tasha, who I think is still there.
0:20:07 > 0:20:11Remember Edward? Course you don't, you've never seen him before.
0:20:11 > 0:20:13We asked him to stand still and look straight ahead for this shot.
0:20:13 > 0:20:16Look at him, he's all over the place.
0:20:16 > 0:20:17He retired at 37.
0:20:17 > 0:20:20- So you're like a complete man of leisure now?- Oh, absolutely.
0:20:20 > 0:20:23Most people would spend their retirement on the golf course -
0:20:23 > 0:20:25I've decided to do mine on the assault course.
0:20:25 > 0:20:26On the assault course, nice.
0:20:26 > 0:20:29I like what you've done there. Are you feeling confident, Edward?
0:20:29 > 0:20:33- I'm feeling young, that's the other problem, I don't feel retired, so let's give it a go.- OK.
0:20:33 > 0:20:35KLAXON
0:20:35 > 0:20:38OK, here comes the jump...and then the fall.
0:20:38 > 0:20:40Bank the drone, but straight into the drink.
0:20:40 > 0:20:42So far, so good.
0:20:42 > 0:20:44Come on, all that time on his hands,
0:20:44 > 0:20:47he's bound to have spent it getting fit. He hasn't.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50- Oh, he's break dancing! - ZOE LAUGHS
0:20:50 > 0:20:52- I like it! - ASHLEY LAUGHS
0:20:52 > 0:20:55So no trip to New York, but, as Moses says...
0:20:55 > 0:20:57you bank the tablet.
0:20:58 > 0:21:02The thing about Edward is... he's just so graceful.
0:21:02 > 0:21:03- Whoo!- Whoo!
0:21:03 > 0:21:05Come on!
0:21:07 > 0:21:09- Come on! - EDWARD WHIMPERS
0:21:09 > 0:21:10Come on!
0:21:12 > 0:21:14I think we'll be sticking at two children.
0:21:14 > 0:21:16BOTH LAUGH
0:21:16 > 0:21:18I don't care!
0:21:18 > 0:21:19I missed the touchpad?!
0:21:19 > 0:21:20No, you haven't, Ed,
0:21:20 > 0:21:23and having conquered the Beam and banked a food mixer,
0:21:23 > 0:21:25it's the Slide.
0:21:26 > 0:21:30It is a race, Ed, so maybe wave at the bottom when it's all finished.
0:21:30 > 0:21:31There he goes.
0:21:31 > 0:21:33And he cleaned up.
0:21:33 > 0:21:37So, shy and very much retiring Ed banked five prizes with a time of...
0:21:39 > 0:21:42I look in the mirror and I see an 18-year-old, good-looking man,
0:21:42 > 0:21:45- but he's not as fit as he looks in the mirror.- Not as fit as he looks.
0:21:45 > 0:21:48Well, I seem to remember you saying something like two kids is enough
0:21:48 > 0:21:49once you'd done the Pole Vault.
0:21:49 > 0:21:52Any aspirations of a third child have probably drifted away.
0:21:52 > 0:21:55- It's probably for the best. - LAUGHTER
0:21:56 > 0:21:59Ed's not the only person who left a piece of himself at the Pole Vault.
0:21:59 > 0:22:01Just listen to what these people thought.
0:22:01 > 0:22:03What a horrible thing that is.
0:22:03 > 0:22:04- Impossible.- Impossible?
0:22:04 > 0:22:06Really scary, really scary.
0:22:06 > 0:22:07- Mental.- It's terrifying.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09Oh, my God. This is so scary!
0:22:09 > 0:22:10Oh, dear me!
0:22:12 > 0:22:13How deep is that?
0:22:13 > 0:22:15Oh, my God.
0:22:15 > 0:22:17Ah, man. This looks a bit high.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21Contestants tried all sorts of ways to get across,
0:22:21 > 0:22:24but my personal favourites were the sliders.
0:22:24 > 0:22:25Like Bethany.
0:22:25 > 0:22:26BETHANY SCREAMS
0:22:26 > 0:22:29MUSIC: Guaglione by Perez Prado
0:22:29 > 0:22:31She kind of just slid down it!
0:22:31 > 0:22:33The pole punchers like Paul...
0:22:35 > 0:22:37Come on.
0:22:37 > 0:22:38Ahh...oh.
0:22:38 > 0:22:39Oh!
0:22:40 > 0:22:42PAUL SCREAMS
0:22:45 > 0:22:48You can tell by his face that it hardly hurt at all.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51The pinballers like Amy...
0:22:52 > 0:22:53Charge!
0:23:03 > 0:23:06Amy should definitely go one up for a spectacular combo shot.
0:23:07 > 0:23:10There are the acrobats like James.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12- Oh!- Oh!- Wheee! Oh!
0:23:12 > 0:23:14- Oh!- Oh!
0:23:14 > 0:23:16- Upside down.- He went in upside down.
0:23:21 > 0:23:22Quite the gymnast.
0:23:24 > 0:23:26Alexander had an ingenious idea.
0:23:28 > 0:23:30Oh! This is a new one!
0:23:31 > 0:23:33Oh, that is a lot further than I thought.
0:23:33 > 0:23:34ASHLEY AND ZOE LAUGH
0:23:36 > 0:23:39But without question, my personal preference for outstanding
0:23:39 > 0:23:41pole performance goes to Richard.
0:23:49 > 0:23:51Oh.
0:23:51 > 0:23:52RICHARD ROARS
0:23:52 > 0:23:53HE GROANS
0:24:01 > 0:24:04A huge thank you to all the contestants on Can't Touch This,
0:24:04 > 0:24:06who showed us that with strength...
0:24:07 > 0:24:09- Oh, my God!- Whoa!
0:24:09 > 0:24:11- So close! - ZOE SHOUTS
0:24:11 > 0:24:13..determination...
0:24:13 > 0:24:15Go on, Laura. Go on, Laura.
0:24:15 > 0:24:16Oh.
0:24:16 > 0:24:18..and a whole lot of gumption...
0:24:18 > 0:24:19Oh, she got through!
0:24:22 > 0:24:24..some things are still quite impossible.
0:24:24 > 0:24:27Except for our lifeguard who did it on his tea break.
0:24:31 > 0:24:33So, how hard could it have been, really?
0:24:33 > 0:24:35THEY CHEER
0:24:40 > 0:24:43Time now for a double dose of unseen footage from the pilot.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46Let's go to Becky versus Yasmin.
0:24:47 > 0:24:49Two of our most competitive contestants.
0:24:49 > 0:24:51Look up "competitive" in the dictionary
0:24:51 > 0:24:53and you'll see their faces. No, seriously.
0:24:53 > 0:24:56I've got a dictionary right here. Let me have a look. FLICKS THROUGH PAGES
0:24:56 > 0:24:59Oh! This one doesn't have any pictures in it. Publishing(!)
0:24:59 > 0:25:01So, Becky, do you have any hobbies?
0:25:01 > 0:25:04You play the trumpet, the harmonica, the ukulele
0:25:04 > 0:25:06and you want to learn the foot tambourine
0:25:06 > 0:25:07so you can be a one-man band?
0:25:07 > 0:25:09- Yes.- Is this true? - That's what I want.
0:25:09 > 0:25:12NEEDLE SKIPS I'm a fan of the knee flute myself.
0:25:12 > 0:25:14- Horn under the armpit, as well.- Oh, why not?
0:25:14 > 0:25:18Yasmin, on the other hand, has a donkey called Teddy.
0:25:18 > 0:25:20This is going to be very hard to call.
0:25:20 > 0:25:21STARTING BUZZER
0:25:21 > 0:25:22And they're off.
0:25:22 > 0:25:25Yasmin up and quickly down.
0:25:25 > 0:25:26Ah, but she's not out.
0:25:26 > 0:25:28Almost out.
0:25:28 > 0:25:29Come on, you can do it.
0:25:29 > 0:25:30I believe in you!
0:25:31 > 0:25:32Oh, dear.
0:25:32 > 0:25:35No prizes and two penalties already.
0:25:38 > 0:25:40Becky meanwhile is assembling
0:25:40 > 0:25:42the drum kit for her first solo performance.
0:25:42 > 0:25:44SHE YELLS
0:25:45 > 0:25:47That heavy, Becky?
0:25:47 > 0:25:48It's so heavy!
0:25:48 > 0:25:50Just warming up the vocal cords, there.
0:25:50 > 0:25:52You can do it!
0:25:52 > 0:25:54- Yes!- Yeah, keep telling yourself that. Come on!
0:25:54 > 0:25:55Will she bank her first prize?
0:25:57 > 0:25:58You can do it.
0:25:58 > 0:25:59And, yes! Tablet in the bank.
0:25:59 > 0:26:01Yes! Woohoo!
0:26:01 > 0:26:04And it's a tablet for Yasmin, too.
0:26:04 > 0:26:06But can she conquer the Wall of Doom?
0:26:07 > 0:26:10- Oh-h-h... Oh!- Oh!
0:26:10 > 0:26:12Good face plant from Yasmin.
0:26:12 > 0:26:13Oh, it's like poetry.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16With a...final violent rhyming couplet.
0:26:16 > 0:26:19MUSIC: The Blue Danube Waltz by Johann Strauss II
0:26:19 > 0:26:20- Oh!- Oh!
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Now Becky's at the Pole Vault.
0:26:22 > 0:26:24Good, tight grip there...
0:26:24 > 0:26:26- I can't watch.- I'm nervous. This is the bit.
0:26:28 > 0:26:30..which she seems to let go of almost immediately.
0:26:30 > 0:26:31That's a shame.
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Maybe Yasmin will do better.
0:26:33 > 0:26:34Great frogs' legs.
0:26:36 > 0:26:37Bad finish.
0:26:38 > 0:26:40Is it wrong that I find this very relaxing?
0:26:44 > 0:26:47The Beam now, and Yasmin is making it look easy.
0:26:47 > 0:26:50It's almost as if she's forgotten that punchbags are there.
0:26:52 > 0:26:54Oh, that jogged her memory.
0:26:54 > 0:26:56At least she banked her food mixer.
0:26:56 > 0:26:58Very nice landing. Perfect.
0:27:00 > 0:27:03Becky, the waitress, is opting for the mad-dash technique.
0:27:06 > 0:27:07So far, so concussed.
0:27:09 > 0:27:12She's banked the mixer and now on the move again.
0:27:12 > 0:27:14- How many fingers am I holding up, love?- One!
0:27:14 > 0:27:18It'll take more than a punch bag to the face to stop Becky.
0:27:18 > 0:27:20She banks a smartphone.
0:27:21 > 0:27:24She stops the clock and banks a dishwasher with a time of
0:27:24 > 0:27:26four minutes, 49 seconds, after penalties.
0:27:26 > 0:27:28The things were hitting us on the head. I didn't fall over.
0:27:28 > 0:27:31I'm used to being knocked on the head with people holding trays.
0:27:31 > 0:27:35- Wow, part of getting whacked in the head, as a waitress? - Part of my daily life.
0:27:35 > 0:27:39Yasmin at the Slide now. And...come on.
0:27:39 > 0:27:42Oh, she missed it by a cat's whisker.
0:27:43 > 0:27:46But she does take a dishwasher and her final time,
0:27:46 > 0:27:49including penalties, 5.47.
0:27:49 > 0:27:52That was so hard. That was so hard.
0:27:52 > 0:27:55- Harder than you thought? - Yeah, a lot harder than I thought.
0:27:55 > 0:27:58Time for our first honourable mention.
0:27:58 > 0:28:02The punniest run goes to Jeff, who loves animals and is an avid angler.
0:28:04 > 0:28:07But did Ashley and Zoe talk about any of that? No!
0:28:07 > 0:28:09They just made fish puns.
0:28:09 > 0:28:14This is going to be very difficult "cod" those little blocks are very slippery.
0:28:14 > 0:28:15- Cod those?- You see?
0:28:15 > 0:28:19- You see what I did there? Cod's a fish.- Can he get a perch...?
0:28:20 > 0:28:25- ..on the top of there? Perch is a fish.- Very nice. Perch.
0:28:25 > 0:28:27- Oh, perch is a fish?- Yeah.
0:28:27 > 0:28:29Oh...
0:28:31 > 0:28:34..trying to work in Dr Eelgood but that's...it's just not...
0:28:34 > 0:28:39- It's not happening. - It's not the plaice for it.
0:28:39 > 0:28:40All right.
0:28:40 > 0:28:43- Let's see if he can tackle the bream.- OK.
0:28:43 > 0:28:46Oh, you're on fire!
0:28:46 > 0:28:48I didn't catch that one...
0:28:48 > 0:28:51I'm hard of herring.
0:28:51 > 0:28:54- Stuck in the deep blue. - He's had a whale of a time.
0:28:54 > 0:28:56He's like a fish out of water in that foam.
0:28:59 > 0:29:02- Give me a hug, give me a hug, come on.- Oh, change your tuna!
0:29:05 > 0:29:07I'm sorry.
0:29:09 > 0:29:11Oh, Jeff.
0:29:11 > 0:29:14He's haddock enough. I'm out of them.
0:29:14 > 0:29:15If you can think of any more fish puns,
0:29:15 > 0:29:19let minnow, or e-mail AnnChovy@BBC.co.uk.
0:29:19 > 0:29:22Time now for another honourable mention - this is Joe.
0:29:22 > 0:29:27He is officially the fastest man of the series. Watch and be amazed.
0:29:27 > 0:29:29Fling him!
0:29:29 > 0:29:32Watch him fly.
0:29:32 > 0:29:34He did a girlie yelp.
0:29:34 > 0:29:37Jammy Joe at the Travelator and, boom, back to trampoline.
0:29:37 > 0:29:41- I like his style.- Oh, wow.
0:29:41 > 0:29:45- Yes! Woohoo.- What are those?- Boom.
0:29:45 > 0:29:48Bagged a cross-trainer, too.
0:29:48 > 0:29:50Did he? Oh, big surprise.
0:29:53 > 0:29:57- And the Wall Of Doom didn't slow him down.- Joe, can you make it?
0:29:57 > 0:29:59Oh, strength.
0:30:01 > 0:30:04- Anyone can do this Pole Vault. - If he does this I'll be so happy.
0:30:04 > 0:30:06I might cry.
0:30:06 > 0:30:09- Oh, so unlucky. - Oh! Not a bad attempt.
0:30:09 > 0:30:13- But he kept his head above water. - Yeah.- Very classy.
0:30:13 > 0:30:14Joe on the beam.
0:30:16 > 0:30:19Misses the first three.
0:30:21 > 0:30:23Oh. Nope.
0:30:27 > 0:30:29Oh, pushing his luck there.
0:30:30 > 0:30:33Not the cleanest of touches, but they all count.
0:30:34 > 0:30:37Just two touch points left for a full house.
0:30:39 > 0:30:41Did he bank both prizes?
0:30:43 > 0:30:45Of course he did.
0:30:45 > 0:30:48And he banked the camera and stopped the clock with a ridiculously
0:30:48 > 0:30:51fast time of two minutes and 13 seconds.
0:30:51 > 0:30:52Dynamite.
0:30:52 > 0:30:54- Thank you very much. - Not bad. And good time.
0:30:54 > 0:30:57If you don't go through, I'll eat my hat. I'll eat your hat. Well done.
0:30:57 > 0:30:59Thank you. Thank you very much, cheers.
0:30:59 > 0:31:01This is Sarah, who gets an honourable mention
0:31:01 > 0:31:03for the loudest run.
0:31:03 > 0:31:05I said the loudest.
0:31:05 > 0:31:07SHE SCREAMS
0:31:07 > 0:31:09Yep, that's both eardrums gone.
0:31:11 > 0:31:12SHE SCREAMS
0:31:12 > 0:31:14Quiet as a jackhammer.
0:31:14 > 0:31:15SHE GASPS
0:31:15 > 0:31:17SHE SCREAMS
0:31:20 > 0:31:21How do you feel about that?
0:31:21 > 0:31:23SHE SCREAMS
0:31:23 > 0:31:24She likes it.
0:31:24 > 0:31:27Gary gets a mention for the most painful run.
0:31:27 > 0:31:28HE YELLS
0:31:28 > 0:31:31- It's not an easy watch. - Go on. Yes.
0:31:31 > 0:31:33He's going to have a bit of a bruised bum.
0:31:33 > 0:31:34Bet that hurts in the morning.
0:31:43 > 0:31:47Luckily for him, Gary's body had an awful lot of...give.
0:31:50 > 0:31:51Oh.
0:31:51 > 0:31:54# Real slow, I'll let it go
0:31:54 > 0:31:58# I'm so excited I just can't hide it... #
0:31:59 > 0:32:01Please, Lord...
0:32:01 > 0:32:03let the horror end.
0:32:03 > 0:32:05And the honourable mention for the shortest run
0:32:05 > 0:32:07goes to Eddie.
0:32:12 > 0:32:14I'd like to thank Eddie personally.
0:32:14 > 0:32:17We broke for lunch early that day. I had the croquettes.
0:32:19 > 0:32:21Honourable mention to Darren Dunwell,
0:32:21 > 0:32:23the winner of our pilot episode.
0:32:23 > 0:32:25Look at that monstrous hat we made him wear!
0:32:25 > 0:32:29If you want to win a costume design Bafta, you have to go there.
0:32:29 > 0:32:33Dunwell's his name. It's also a lovely bit of foreshadowing.
0:32:34 > 0:32:35Banked the drone.
0:32:35 > 0:32:39And down and up straightaway for a trip to New York.
0:32:39 > 0:32:40Banked.
0:32:40 > 0:32:43Darren is so good, he even had time for a little sit down there.
0:32:43 > 0:32:45Ooh, Dunwell done poorly!
0:32:45 > 0:32:48Stack 'Em High didn't slow him down.
0:32:48 > 0:32:50The Pole Vault.
0:32:50 > 0:32:51What's he got?
0:32:52 > 0:32:53No, no, no. Oh!
0:32:53 > 0:32:55Ooooh!
0:32:55 > 0:32:57Not a bad attempt!
0:32:58 > 0:33:01Very canny there on The Beam.
0:33:01 > 0:33:05- Oh!- So crafty! That is a great technique.
0:33:06 > 0:33:08No penalties so far.
0:33:09 > 0:33:12Two more touch points now for a perfect, perfect score.
0:33:12 > 0:33:15Oh, and he's missed them both!
0:33:15 > 0:33:18But he didn't miss this. Yes!
0:33:19 > 0:33:21Darren, thank you for being our guinea pig.
0:33:21 > 0:33:23Give that man a car.
0:33:23 > 0:33:26Also, honorary shout out to the people who entertained us
0:33:26 > 0:33:28with their useless talents.
0:33:28 > 0:33:29Like Mickey.
0:33:29 > 0:33:30HE WHISTLES
0:33:32 > 0:33:35- That's pretty loud.- And Dan.
0:33:35 > 0:33:36I can't touch this.
0:33:36 > 0:33:39What? Two third legs and one third body?
0:33:39 > 0:33:42I'll finish this with clinical pre...er, finesse.
0:33:42 > 0:33:43- Almost.- Almost, yeah.
0:33:43 > 0:33:45LAUGHTER
0:33:45 > 0:33:47I knew what I wanted to say, as well!
0:33:47 > 0:33:49And Roxy.
0:33:49 > 0:33:51# Window the in doggie That is much how?
0:33:51 > 0:33:53# Tail waggly the with one the? #
0:33:53 > 0:33:56How Much Is That Doggie In The Window?, sung backwards!
0:33:56 > 0:33:58And this is Carl from our pilot.
0:33:58 > 0:34:02His useless talent is touching celebrities' underwear. What?
0:34:02 > 0:34:03I used to work in Canada.
0:34:03 > 0:34:05I used to work in a hotel over there on my gap year.
0:34:05 > 0:34:07John Travolta came into my hotel,
0:34:07 > 0:34:09and I used to look after his room for a bit.
0:34:09 > 0:34:14- And I cleared away his laundry and stuff, and...- Yeah.- Yeah, and...
0:34:14 > 0:34:17Yeah. It all went to laundry. I didn't want any of that.
0:34:17 > 0:34:18- So you're not wearing it?- No.
0:34:18 > 0:34:20LAUGHTER
0:34:20 > 0:34:21MUSIC: Greased Lightnin'
0:34:21 > 0:34:24And he's off to a flying start with a drone banked,
0:34:24 > 0:34:27and still on his feet, he runs for it.
0:34:30 > 0:34:33That's New York banked. Carl's wearing his lucky underpants.
0:34:33 > 0:34:35There Charlize Theron's. Apparently she's livid.
0:34:35 > 0:34:38Wanted to wear them to the Independent Spirit Awards.
0:34:38 > 0:34:40Couldn't find them in the drawer.
0:34:45 > 0:34:47He's flying round the course!
0:34:47 > 0:34:49Could Stack 'Em High slow him down?
0:34:51 > 0:34:53No!
0:34:53 > 0:34:56Now, most people baulk at the Wall Of Doom, but not Carl.
0:34:58 > 0:35:00Can anything stop this man?
0:35:03 > 0:35:04Yes.
0:35:08 > 0:35:10He's only gone and broken our pole!
0:35:10 > 0:35:14Jet is going to be furious when I get home.
0:35:14 > 0:35:17We didn't keep the receipt for that, Carl, and we were out of warranty.
0:35:17 > 0:35:19Thanks for nothing!
0:35:20 > 0:35:23Carl managing there to avoid the punchbags.
0:35:25 > 0:35:27A lot of effort for a kitchen mixer, isn't it?
0:35:27 > 0:35:29We don't show this bit on Bake Off.
0:35:31 > 0:35:35Come on, Carl, be quick. Just a slight left.
0:35:35 > 0:35:37This is a fast run from Carl!
0:35:41 > 0:35:43Down he goes.
0:35:43 > 0:35:45Oh, and banked the smartphone. Magic stuff.
0:35:45 > 0:35:49Lands on his feet, stops the clock, and banks a dishwasher.
0:35:49 > 0:35:53With no time penalties and a time of two minutes and 57 seconds,
0:35:53 > 0:35:58Carl went round the course like his pants were on fire.
0:35:58 > 0:35:59They're not his pants.
0:36:02 > 0:36:05You are on fire!
0:36:05 > 0:36:09You are... The determination in you was absolutely incredible.
0:36:09 > 0:36:12First of all, on the Travelator, you weren't giving up - both prizes.
0:36:12 > 0:36:15- Trip to New York, banked. - Oh!- Yeah, he's happy about that.
0:36:15 > 0:36:18- Let's hear it for Carl. - Thank you.- Good work.
0:36:18 > 0:36:20Even The Beam couldn't beat our Carl.
0:36:20 > 0:36:23The same couldn't be said for everyone.
0:36:23 > 0:36:26Did you know that all the bags were designed to specifically target
0:36:26 > 0:36:29the five types of Can't Touch This contestants?
0:36:30 > 0:36:33Punchbag one is for the oblivious.
0:36:33 > 0:36:35SHE SHRIEKS
0:36:35 > 0:36:36Oh!
0:36:39 > 0:36:42Punchbag two is for the noncommitters.
0:36:44 > 0:36:46Ooooh!
0:36:46 > 0:36:47Oh, she's gone!
0:36:50 > 0:36:53The third punchbag was for the panickers.
0:36:54 > 0:36:55Nicely done. Nicely...
0:36:58 > 0:37:01That beam literally KO'd her there. Gosh.
0:37:01 > 0:37:03Punchbag four was for the, um...
0:37:03 > 0:37:05Oh, what was it again?
0:37:05 > 0:37:08Oh, nearly took the legs out!
0:37:08 > 0:37:09Um... Forgetful!
0:37:16 > 0:37:19And the fifth punchbag was for the overconfident.
0:37:29 > 0:37:32Which punchbag knocked off the most people?
0:37:32 > 0:37:33Well, let's find out.
0:37:33 > 0:37:35MUSIC: Don't Stop Me Now By Queen
0:37:35 > 0:37:36No!
0:37:43 > 0:37:44Oh!
0:37:44 > 0:37:45She's gone.
0:37:50 > 0:37:52Nooo!
0:37:52 > 0:37:53Oh, no!
0:37:53 > 0:37:54Oh, yay!
0:38:03 > 0:38:05Oooh!
0:38:08 > 0:38:09Argh!
0:38:12 > 0:38:13Keep nice and low.
0:38:13 > 0:38:15- Oooh.- Good work.
0:38:17 > 0:38:19Ooooh!
0:38:20 > 0:38:24- No!- Oh, he gets it all the way down!- No!
0:38:25 > 0:38:27No, no!
0:38:30 > 0:38:32Lost The Beam!
0:38:35 > 0:38:36No!
0:38:36 > 0:38:37Nooo!
0:38:40 > 0:38:41- Ooooh!- Oh!
0:38:42 > 0:38:45- Oh, so close! - Holding her breath there.
0:38:45 > 0:38:46I know, just in case she went!
0:38:47 > 0:38:50Gosh. Oh, my gosh! Aaaah!
0:38:51 > 0:38:55And the punchbag that knocked down the most contestants is...
0:38:55 > 0:38:56punchbag number four.
0:38:56 > 0:38:59I'd like to thank everyone who made this possible.
0:38:59 > 0:39:01My mum, my dad...
0:39:05 > 0:39:08Of the multitude of people who took part in round one,
0:39:08 > 0:39:11only the sixth fastest from each episode could progress
0:39:11 > 0:39:14to the next level, which is why it was really important
0:39:14 > 0:39:16to stop the clock by touching the last touch point.
0:39:16 > 0:39:19No! Bank the headphones! Bank the headphones!
0:39:19 > 0:39:21Don't forget the headphones!
0:39:21 > 0:39:22Touch the end!
0:39:23 > 0:39:25LAUGHTER
0:39:25 > 0:39:27Don't want to miss the last one!
0:39:34 > 0:39:36What's he doing in the pool?
0:39:39 > 0:39:40Confused.
0:39:45 > 0:39:48HE PANTS
0:39:48 > 0:39:50Mate.
0:39:50 > 0:39:52There's one more.
0:39:52 > 0:39:53LAUGHTER
0:39:55 > 0:39:56No worries.
0:39:56 > 0:39:59And some of them touched it with their face.
0:40:05 > 0:40:08As if this course wasn't hard enough.
0:40:09 > 0:40:12So, it was only the sixth fastest from each episode
0:40:12 > 0:40:14that made it through to round two.
0:40:22 > 0:40:25Those who made it through to round two were hoping that they
0:40:25 > 0:40:29could survive long enough to jump for a reasonably priced hatchback.
0:40:29 > 0:40:32But first, they had to clamber over Clamber Crossing.
0:40:34 > 0:40:36These folks were the best of the best.
0:40:36 > 0:40:39The fastest, the smartest, the most agile.
0:40:41 > 0:40:42So what happened here, then?
0:40:42 > 0:40:46Oh, I'm dizzy just watching them. Actually, set them on their way.
0:40:46 > 0:40:48Your wish is my command. Cue the klaxon!
0:40:48 > 0:40:49KLAXON
0:40:50 > 0:40:53All right! Ah!
0:40:53 > 0:40:54Oh!
0:40:54 > 0:40:56Oh, no! Go on. Yes, yes!
0:40:56 > 0:40:57Ow!
0:40:57 > 0:40:59Oh, mamma mia.
0:40:59 > 0:41:01Oh, that's got to hurt.
0:41:04 > 0:41:05Yes, go for the, um...
0:41:05 > 0:41:07No, no, not the... The other one.
0:41:07 > 0:41:08Yes! No, the other!
0:41:08 > 0:41:10Oh. SHE GROANS
0:41:12 > 0:41:15We lost a lot of good people at Clamber Crossing.
0:41:16 > 0:41:19Some of them didn't even know how to sit down.
0:41:19 > 0:41:20Oh!
0:41:22 > 0:41:24As I said, best of the best.
0:41:24 > 0:41:27The Rings and the Foam.
0:41:27 > 0:41:29One of the weaker Harry Potter films.
0:41:29 > 0:41:33You don't want to land in that. How to get across?
0:41:33 > 0:41:35Well, there were the crawlers.
0:41:35 > 0:41:38Last out the chair, but doing well.
0:41:38 > 0:41:40That's them crawling there.
0:41:41 > 0:41:44We had the sliders...
0:41:44 > 0:41:47who were essentially just lower-down crawlers.
0:41:47 > 0:41:49And then this lot did this.
0:41:51 > 0:41:52WHOOPING
0:41:52 > 0:41:54Follow me! Follow me!
0:41:57 > 0:42:01- Oh, my gosh!- He is unbelievable!
0:42:01 > 0:42:05I'll level with you - that worked better for some than others.
0:42:07 > 0:42:09Look, Mum, no hands!
0:42:14 > 0:42:15Well done!
0:42:21 > 0:42:22Arrrgh!
0:42:27 > 0:42:30The Dropping Ropes.
0:42:30 > 0:42:32Remember Ian?
0:42:32 > 0:42:34Well, he blazed through it.
0:42:34 > 0:42:35Good rope, bad rope?
0:42:35 > 0:42:37- Bad rope for Mahala.- Oh, bad one.
0:42:37 > 0:42:39Ian starts with a good rope, which means,
0:42:39 > 0:42:42- if this rope's a goody, too, he's across.- Look at that!
0:42:42 > 0:42:44Mahala just... Oh!
0:42:44 > 0:42:48But how would that look done incorrectly multiple times?
0:42:49 > 0:42:51From a variety of angles?
0:42:55 > 0:42:57And at different speeds?
0:43:00 > 0:43:02Answered my own question.
0:43:04 > 0:43:05It was carnage.
0:43:06 > 0:43:08Whoa!
0:43:08 > 0:43:10It was messy.
0:43:10 > 0:43:11SHE YELLS
0:43:11 > 0:43:15But good sportsmanship won out every time.
0:43:15 > 0:43:18- Yeah!- Come on!- All right, boys?
0:43:19 > 0:43:22Well, almost every time.
0:43:22 > 0:43:24Nice try!
0:43:28 > 0:43:32Spin Mountain - what to say about Spin Mountain?
0:43:32 > 0:43:34The more discerning viewer will notice it spins,
0:43:34 > 0:43:38and vaguely resembles the shape of a mountain.
0:43:38 > 0:43:42This slippy spinning cylindrical elevation is the ultimate test.
0:43:42 > 0:43:43For a cameraman.
0:43:45 > 0:43:48But it's here that we found our winners.
0:43:48 > 0:43:51Yummy daddy Lewis from Cardiff,
0:43:51 > 0:43:53screaming Sarah from Lisburn,
0:43:53 > 0:43:56sandy Andy,
0:43:56 > 0:43:58Nathan the boy racer,
0:43:58 > 0:44:00rocket man Gavin,
0:44:00 > 0:44:03Brighton B-boy Muhala,
0:44:03 > 0:44:05Richard, who kept it simple, stupid,
0:44:05 > 0:44:07Ben the verminator,
0:44:07 > 0:44:11and jammy Joe. These were our worthy winners
0:44:11 > 0:44:14and they all got to play for their banked prices on the Travelator.
0:44:14 > 0:44:17They could choose to play single-handed...
0:44:18 > 0:44:20..or double handed.
0:44:20 > 0:44:23Or ever so slightly short-handed.
0:44:29 > 0:44:32And as if all that wasn't enough,
0:44:32 > 0:44:34the next thing they know is they're up here.
0:44:34 > 0:44:37- Ashley, stop it. - Just a little one here, ready, look.
0:44:37 > 0:44:39SHE LAUGHS
0:44:39 > 0:44:41Ashley!
0:44:42 > 0:44:45Trying to touch...that.
0:44:47 > 0:44:49One jump.
0:44:52 > 0:44:54One car.
0:44:54 > 0:44:56One chance.
0:44:57 > 0:44:59And one heck of a long way down.
0:45:10 > 0:45:12KLAXON
0:45:29 > 0:45:31HE SCREAMS
0:45:39 > 0:45:41SHE SCREAMS
0:45:49 > 0:45:51CHEERING
0:45:51 > 0:45:52Come on!
0:45:52 > 0:45:56So, as the glitter settles on the first series of Can't Touch This,
0:45:56 > 0:45:57it's time to say goodbye...
0:45:57 > 0:45:59Hang on! This series isn't over
0:45:59 > 0:46:00until the '80s boyband fan
0:46:00 > 0:46:04from London sings his weirdly concocted song about the show.
0:46:04 > 0:46:06Take it away, you legend, Paul.
0:46:06 > 0:46:09# It's so hot, can't touch this
0:46:09 > 0:46:10# Big prizes you can win
0:46:10 > 0:46:14# So hot, can't touch this so let the games begin! #
0:46:28 > 0:46:32# So hot, can't touch this! I'm going to raise the bar
0:46:32 > 0:46:34# So hot, can't touch this...
0:46:34 > 0:46:37# And win a brand-new car! #
0:46:37 > 0:46:40Oh, look, he's writing the lyrics as he goes.
0:46:50 > 0:46:53Give me an O, give me an E, what have we got?
0:46:53 > 0:46:55Chloe!
0:46:55 > 0:46:57- She's not that type of cheerleader.- On your own!
0:46:58 > 0:47:01- Yeah!- I love it!
0:47:06 > 0:47:08Oh, very nice.
0:47:13 > 0:47:15I might bust out a little...
0:47:15 > 0:47:19Bust out a little robot? Oh, I'm excited for this one.
0:47:19 > 0:47:23# So hot! Can't touch this, big prizes you can win.
0:47:23 > 0:47:27# So hot! Can't touch this, let the games begin. #
0:47:29 > 0:47:32- Oh, look, we've got a little shimmy. - Yeah, little shimmy.
0:47:32 > 0:47:34He's like Tigger.
0:47:35 > 0:47:37He's trying to pole dance.
0:47:43 > 0:47:47# Jen's got the flag, she's got the funk, yeah. #
0:47:52 > 0:47:54Oh! Oh, me dicky hip.
0:47:54 > 0:47:58# With Ashley and Zoe we're gonna have a ball... #
0:48:01 > 0:48:03It's not like that. Stop!
0:48:05 > 0:48:06That's good. Is there more?
0:48:06 > 0:48:08- Yeah, there is.- All right, OK.
0:48:08 > 0:48:11# I parachuted into foam and climbin' a ten-foot wall. #
0:48:11 > 0:48:13- Whoo!- Whoo!- I love this man.
0:48:13 > 0:48:14- Sorry.- That's good.
0:48:14 > 0:48:18So, that was it. Series one in the bag.
0:48:18 > 0:48:20Don't touch anything while we're gone.
0:48:20 > 0:48:23Have I got to sit in here until that?
0:48:23 > 0:48:24Have I? Why has everyone left?
0:48:24 > 0:48:26Hello? Hello!
0:48:27 > 0:48:28Hello!