Episode 5

Download Subtitles

Transcript

0:00:02 > 0:00:04One rule, touch the prize, win the prize.

0:00:07 > 0:00:09But doing that takes a whole load of this...

0:00:09 > 0:00:10BUZZER

0:00:12 > 0:00:13HE PANTS

0:00:14 > 0:00:16A ridiculous amount of this...

0:00:21 > 0:00:23And absolutely masses of this...

0:00:25 > 0:00:26HE SCREAMS

0:00:30 > 0:00:31HE PANTS

0:00:31 > 0:00:33It's fast... It's furious..

0:00:33 > 0:00:35- It's... Can't Touch This! - Can't Touch This!

0:00:49 > 0:00:51Hello, I'm Zoe Ball.

0:00:51 > 0:00:53And I'm Ashley Banjo, and welcome to Can't Touch This.

0:00:53 > 0:00:56Tonight, we have an obstacle course like no other,

0:00:56 > 0:00:59there are catapults, slides, swinging bits,

0:00:59 > 0:01:01spinning things, you name it.

0:01:01 > 0:01:05- And water.- Oh, yes. Let's not forget the freezing cold water.

0:01:05 > 0:01:07We have contestants warming up, ready to jump,

0:01:07 > 0:01:09climb and clamber their way around it,

0:01:09 > 0:01:11touching touch points on the way.

0:01:11 > 0:01:13- And what do touch points mean? - Prizes.- Prizes.

0:01:13 > 0:01:16Yes, until one of them emerges victorious,

0:01:16 > 0:01:18and gets the chance to jump for that car.

0:01:18 > 0:01:21To introduce these heroic souls going for glory tonight,

0:01:21 > 0:01:25we have our invisible co-host, Sue Perkins.

0:01:25 > 0:01:26Where are you, Sue?

0:01:26 > 0:01:29Oh, don't worry about me, I've been here all week.

0:01:29 > 0:01:31Now, let's meet the contestants.

0:01:31 > 0:01:34They're brave, they're bold, they're bussed in against their will.

0:01:34 > 0:01:37Tonight, these mighty warriors will attempt to make their families

0:01:37 > 0:01:39and their labradors proud!

0:01:39 > 0:01:42Amongst their ranks, a really good kisser from Antrim,

0:01:42 > 0:01:44a Brummie mummy from Birmingham...

0:01:46 > 0:01:49..and someone who wants YOU from London.

0:01:49 > 0:01:52They're all hoping they can touch this...tonight!

0:01:54 > 0:01:55And it all starts here.

0:01:55 > 0:01:57Our catapult sends our contestants on a short,

0:01:57 > 0:02:00but exhilarating, flight into a foam pit.

0:02:00 > 0:02:02Then it's on to the travelator.

0:02:02 > 0:02:03High above is the first touch point.

0:02:03 > 0:02:05Touch it and bank a cross trainer.

0:02:05 > 0:02:08Don't kid yourself, you'll never take it out the box.

0:02:08 > 0:02:10Also, on the travelator, the second touch point,

0:02:10 > 0:02:12which banks an epic trip for two to New York,

0:02:12 > 0:02:14the city so good they named it.

0:02:15 > 0:02:18But one misstep here and you're in for a dunking.

0:02:18 > 0:02:20Then it's a short trip to Stack Em High.

0:02:20 > 0:02:23Just build a tower to reach touch point number three

0:02:23 > 0:02:24and bank an internet radio.

0:02:24 > 0:02:27Great for listening to the internet.

0:02:28 > 0:02:31Then take the mighty Pole across the water to the Beam,

0:02:31 > 0:02:35and reach the fourth touch point to bank a fancy camera.

0:02:35 > 0:02:36You can take it in the bath! You can't.

0:02:36 > 0:02:39Next, it's down the slide, and the two swinging touch points,

0:02:39 > 0:02:42which bank an espresso maker and a barbecue.

0:02:42 > 0:02:45The chicken lattes will be on you.

0:02:45 > 0:02:49and the last touch point stops the clock and banks a family tent.

0:02:49 > 0:02:51So, that's summer ruined.

0:02:51 > 0:02:53Every missed touch point equals a 30 second penalty.

0:02:53 > 0:02:56The contestant still standing at the end of the show gets the chance

0:02:56 > 0:02:57to win everything they've banked.

0:02:57 > 0:03:00Don't blame me, I only come here to use the vending machine.

0:03:00 > 0:03:03So, now they know what to do, and it's time for us,

0:03:03 > 0:03:05and for them, to see if they can actually do it.

0:03:05 > 0:03:07Too late for last minute nerves.

0:03:07 > 0:03:09It's time for the first contestant to step up,

0:03:09 > 0:03:10and get the game started.

0:03:13 > 0:03:15# Hey Mickey... #

0:03:15 > 0:03:17Let's meet our first contestant.

0:03:17 > 0:03:19Give us a K, give us an I,

0:03:19 > 0:03:22Give us an R! Oh, I can't be bothered, it's Kirsty.

0:03:24 > 0:03:27So, Kirsty, according to you, it's only losers who say,

0:03:27 > 0:03:29"It's the taking part that counts."

0:03:29 > 0:03:31So, I'm assuming you are in it to win it.

0:03:31 > 0:03:33Absolutely, that's why I'm here. Let's do it!

0:03:33 > 0:03:36Kirsty talking with all the confidence of a girl

0:03:36 > 0:03:39who hasn't yet been shot across a converted aircraft hangar.

0:03:39 > 0:03:40Fire her!

0:03:40 > 0:03:44- KIRSTY SCREAMS REPEATEDLY - Weeeeeee! Weeeeeee! Weeeee!

0:03:44 > 0:03:47- # I'm walking on sunshine... # - Let's go, Kirsty.

0:03:47 > 0:03:50Off to the travelator and the first touch point banks the cross trainer.

0:03:50 > 0:03:53I hope Ashley's towelled it down this time.

0:03:53 > 0:03:56She said she's done an assault course on holiday in Magaluf.

0:03:56 > 0:03:58Hopefully that's set her up nicely.

0:03:58 > 0:04:00- Banked!- Ooh!

0:04:00 > 0:04:01And that's the face gone.

0:04:02 > 0:04:04Bit cheeky.

0:04:04 > 0:04:07The next touch point is the trip to New York. Come on!

0:04:09 > 0:04:10KIRSTY YELPS

0:04:10 > 0:04:12Oh, no, trip to New York trip for Kirsty.

0:04:12 > 0:04:14Just a 30-second penalty.

0:04:14 > 0:04:16I like that move there, I might steal that one.

0:04:16 > 0:04:17KIRSTY YELPS

0:04:17 > 0:04:19Just time to mimic the African grass owl

0:04:19 > 0:04:21and then she's on to Stack 'Em High.

0:04:21 > 0:04:23- It's freezing as well! - ZOE LAUGHS

0:04:26 > 0:04:27OK, Stack Em High now.

0:04:27 > 0:04:29All Kirsty has to do is stack the blocks up

0:04:29 > 0:04:32to the next touch point to bank that internet radio.

0:04:32 > 0:04:34Like that, really.

0:04:34 > 0:04:36Now off to the Wall of Dooooommmm!

0:04:36 > 0:04:40- Ashley, come give us a hand. - All right, give me two secs.

0:04:40 > 0:04:44Arrange these blocks nice and tall, so Kirsty can get over our wall.

0:04:44 > 0:04:46Right, up you go, Kirsty.

0:04:46 > 0:04:48Oh, dear, that bum's hanging out again.

0:04:48 > 0:04:50- Let me just fix me pants. - Tucking herself in.

0:04:50 > 0:04:52- Keeps herself neat.- Neat.

0:04:55 > 0:04:57- She can do it, she can do it... - No problem.- Yay!

0:04:57 > 0:05:00- Well done, Kirsty. Good work.- Yes, Kirsty.

0:05:02 > 0:05:04And now for the mighty Pole vault.

0:05:08 > 0:05:10Oh, there's no way, is there?

0:05:10 > 0:05:13She said, "there's no way."

0:05:15 > 0:05:18- Give it your best shot, Kirsty. - Grip it, grip it.

0:05:18 > 0:05:20Ooh!

0:05:21 > 0:05:24Ooh, that was ra-ra-rather unfortunate.

0:05:24 > 0:05:26She got the other cheek.

0:05:28 > 0:05:29How's the water, Kirsty?

0:05:29 > 0:05:31GURGLING SOUND

0:05:31 > 0:05:33- Pardon?- I swallowed all the water.

0:05:33 > 0:05:35Leave some for the others, Kirsty.

0:05:38 > 0:05:40- I'll fix me pants again. - THEY LAUGH

0:05:40 > 0:05:43I'd take those pants back, if I were you.

0:05:43 > 0:05:46- Off to the Beam now for the camera. - All right, here we go.

0:05:46 > 0:05:49She's got to avoid the swinging punch bags to get the camera,

0:05:49 > 0:05:52which of course is conveniently situated under the Beam.

0:05:52 > 0:05:53Don't release them yet.

0:05:53 > 0:05:56Kirsty giving orders to her cheerleading team here.

0:05:58 > 0:06:00- Ooh!- Kirsty giving us the O again.

0:06:00 > 0:06:03- Ooh!- And again. And again.- Ooh!

0:06:03 > 0:06:04What does that spell?

0:06:04 > 0:06:07Well, it spells 'No Camera for Kirsty'.

0:06:07 > 0:06:09Finally, on to the slide.

0:06:09 > 0:06:12The two swinging touch points bank an espresso machine

0:06:12 > 0:06:13and a barbecue.

0:06:17 > 0:06:19And she's got them both. Well done, Kirsty.

0:06:21 > 0:06:24- BUZZER - She banks the family tent and stops the clock,

0:06:24 > 0:06:27banking a total of five prizes, and completing the course

0:06:27 > 0:06:30with a time of seven minutes and 27 seconds with penalties,

0:06:30 > 0:06:33which makes her our current leader, current cheerleader.

0:06:33 > 0:06:35There was a couple of points there

0:06:35 > 0:06:37I just wanted to come and give you a hug.

0:06:37 > 0:06:39I swallowed all the water, I should've shut my mouth.

0:06:39 > 0:06:42- Well, Kirsty, you've done brilliantly.- Thank you.- Well done.

0:06:42 > 0:06:44- Hopefully we'll get to see you again.- Hopefully.

0:06:44 > 0:06:46- Fingers crossed. - Oh, fingers crossed!

0:06:46 > 0:06:47Meet honest Pete.

0:06:47 > 0:06:51A Renfrewshire football fanatic referee. Phew, just got that out.

0:06:51 > 0:06:54Pete, you're a qualified football referee.

0:06:54 > 0:06:57So, are you going to be playing fair with the other contestants tonight?

0:06:57 > 0:07:00Well, Ashley, I'm known as honest Pete the referee,

0:07:00 > 0:07:02so the answer to that is definitely.

0:07:02 > 0:07:04It's the other contestants you need to worry about.

0:07:05 > 0:07:09Well, Pete lost the toss, so he gets the catapult. Propel!

0:07:09 > 0:07:11WHISTLE

0:07:11 > 0:07:14Oh, great start. Definitely a dive, though.

0:07:14 > 0:07:18I wonder if there's any people who have been red carded by Pete,

0:07:18 > 0:07:20watching now going, "Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

0:07:20 > 0:07:22First touch point for Pete. The cross trainer.

0:07:24 > 0:07:26Oh, no joy but a bit of a Blattering.

0:07:27 > 0:07:29And an early bath.

0:07:29 > 0:07:31- ASHLEY LAUGHS - Slippery feet.

0:07:31 > 0:07:32Oh!

0:07:32 > 0:07:37Not quite travelator fit, so no trip to New York, just A&E.

0:07:37 > 0:07:39Oh, no, he really took a knock.

0:07:41 > 0:07:44Stack 'Em High now for the internet radio.

0:07:44 > 0:07:46- Nice.- Strong, he is tough.

0:07:46 > 0:07:49Let's see if Pete gets elevated or relegated.

0:07:49 > 0:07:50- CHEERING - Banked!- Goal!

0:07:52 > 0:07:55MUSIC: Nessun Dorma by Luciano Pavarotti

0:07:55 > 0:07:59Pete's just renamed the Wall of Doom to the Wall of Minor Inconvenience.

0:07:59 > 0:08:01Can he master the Pole vault?

0:08:01 > 0:08:03Or will it be a red card for Pete?

0:08:07 > 0:08:10- Ah!- Oh, referee!

0:08:10 > 0:08:11Early shower.

0:08:24 > 0:08:26He did not like that.

0:08:26 > 0:08:29On to the Beam now, for the fancy camera.

0:08:29 > 0:08:31There are still five defenders to beat.

0:08:31 > 0:08:34Or plastic yellow punch bags, as we football fans call them.

0:08:34 > 0:08:37Oh, they're all coming for him.

0:08:37 > 0:08:43That is nifty to have survived that, and one last punch bag.

0:08:43 > 0:08:46Go low, go low, go low.

0:08:46 > 0:08:48- Oh!- Ooh!

0:08:48 > 0:08:51Nice header, Pete. But now you're very much off-side.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53- Oh!- Oh, no!

0:08:53 > 0:08:55The last one!

0:08:58 > 0:09:00I think we're going into extra time here.

0:09:00 > 0:09:02- I think we might be.- Yeah.

0:09:02 > 0:09:04Now it's time for the slide tackle.

0:09:04 > 0:09:06That's right, Ash.

0:09:06 > 0:09:08Can he bank the espresso machine and barbecue?

0:09:08 > 0:09:09How about a no?

0:09:12 > 0:09:16Final whistle and family tent banked for Pete. His time, 7:29.

0:09:16 > 0:09:19- Do you think you've done enough for us to see you again?- I doubt it.

0:09:19 > 0:09:20- You're not sure?- I doubt it.

0:09:20 > 0:09:23You never know, Pete. You've been brilliant, fingers crossed.

0:09:23 > 0:09:25Thanks very much, Zoe. Cheers. Thanks.

0:09:27 > 0:09:29PETE EXHALES DEEPLY

0:09:30 > 0:09:32From football to netball.

0:09:32 > 0:09:34Meet Jackie.

0:09:34 > 0:09:36She heads up the netball team.

0:09:36 > 0:09:38She's at the first touch point.

0:09:38 > 0:09:40Looking good. Ouch.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43And that was a free pass.

0:09:43 > 0:09:45Ooh, ouchy, ouchy, ouchy.

0:09:45 > 0:09:48A free pass to just smash your face in.

0:09:49 > 0:09:50Well, we'll, um...

0:09:50 > 0:09:53we'll let you catch your breath and, er talk to your lawyer.

0:09:53 > 0:09:56- This is Tegan Pyke. She keeps bees. - BUZZING

0:09:56 > 0:09:59I think there's one in here. Get off!

0:09:59 > 0:10:02All right, it's time for flight of the bumble bee...keeper.

0:10:02 > 0:10:04Take off. TEGAN SCREAMS

0:10:04 > 0:10:06Beee-autiful, Tegan!

0:10:06 > 0:10:07# Sweetness!

0:10:07 > 0:10:10# Sweets for my sweet... #

0:10:10 > 0:10:11She jumps.

0:10:11 > 0:10:13Oh, dear, Tegan.

0:10:14 > 0:10:18- Classic neck-first manoeuvre. - Headfirst, headfirst for Tegan.

0:10:18 > 0:10:21Right, is she going for the trip to New York?

0:10:21 > 0:10:24- Not going to get very far. - Oh, literally, a TRIP to New York.

0:10:25 > 0:10:28- Oh, she's not giving up, she's not giving up.- Again!

0:10:28 > 0:10:29- She wants that trip.- Come on.

0:10:29 > 0:10:32Oh, belly slide! So frustrating.

0:10:32 > 0:10:36Oh, dear, no prizes banked. But don't worry, bee happy!

0:10:36 > 0:10:39Oh, Jackie's back. She's playing for the holiday.

0:10:39 > 0:10:41She's not afraid of that travelator.

0:10:41 > 0:10:43She's going back in for seconds.

0:10:43 > 0:10:46- She gets straight back... Oh, my...- Can she get up to...?

0:10:48 > 0:10:50Oh, New York, not quite.

0:10:52 > 0:10:55Queen Bee Tegan is at Stack Em High.

0:10:55 > 0:10:59Now she's moving so fast, like a swarm of bees are chasing her.

0:11:00 > 0:11:02- # I can't help myself... # - Ooh.- Ooh.

0:11:02 > 0:11:05- Yes.- And that is the internet radio banked.

0:11:07 > 0:11:08Tegan at the Pole.

0:11:10 > 0:11:11Ooh...

0:11:13 > 0:11:15And Tegan in the pool.

0:11:15 > 0:11:17That was a bit of a shock to the system.

0:11:17 > 0:11:19Tegan asks for a towel.

0:11:19 > 0:11:21Queen Bee Tegan banked the camera on the Beam,

0:11:21 > 0:11:24so now she just has two to go on the slide.

0:11:24 > 0:11:27Well done, Tegan. Come on. Almost there.

0:11:27 > 0:11:32Yes, and she banks the barbecue and the family tent.

0:11:32 > 0:11:34Oh, she must be buzzing now.

0:11:34 > 0:11:36- BUZZING - Oh wait, that bee's back. Get off!

0:11:36 > 0:11:39She stops the clock with a time of five minutes 30,

0:11:39 > 0:11:40including penalties.

0:11:40 > 0:11:41How was that?

0:11:41 > 0:11:43Exhausting.

0:11:43 > 0:11:46Do you think you've done it in a fast enough time? Are you hopeful?

0:11:46 > 0:11:48Hopeful, but not counting on it, to be honest.

0:11:50 > 0:11:51Let's go back to Jackie.

0:11:51 > 0:11:55- Not again, not again...- She's going back on again! Go on, Jackie.

0:11:55 > 0:11:58Not again, she wants that trip to New York.

0:11:58 > 0:12:00Just have a shake, drip dry a bit.

0:12:02 > 0:12:04OK, go on, go on, go on.

0:12:04 > 0:12:07# You're once...

0:12:07 > 0:12:08- # Twice...- Three in a row.

0:12:10 > 0:12:13# Three times a lady...

0:12:16 > 0:12:20# And I love you... #

0:12:22 > 0:12:24This is Jeff.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27He may be all smiles, but there's something very fishy about him.

0:12:29 > 0:12:32Jeff, you love a bit of angling. What's your biggest catch?

0:12:32 > 0:12:34- Erm, bit of carp, about 9lbs. - Oh, impressive.

0:12:34 > 0:12:36How are you going to tackle the course today?

0:12:36 > 0:12:40- Like a salmon swimming upriver. Straight up.- I love it, good luck.

0:12:40 > 0:12:44Leap, Jeff! For goodness...hake!

0:12:44 > 0:12:48- Whoohoo!- Marvellous, channelling the salmon there.

0:12:48 > 0:12:49# On a little dishy

0:12:49 > 0:12:51# You shall have a fishy

0:12:51 > 0:12:53# When the boat comes in... #

0:12:53 > 0:12:55He's banked the cross trainer.

0:12:56 > 0:12:59- He's going for the trip to New York. - Right come on, trip to New York.

0:12:59 > 0:13:03- Go on, like a salmon swimming upstream.- Ooh!

0:13:05 > 0:13:06# You shall have a salmon... #

0:13:06 > 0:13:09Sadly, he didn't make it.

0:13:09 > 0:13:13Now, Jackie's banked the radio at Stack 'Em High,

0:13:13 > 0:13:15but it's the Wall Of Doom for her.

0:13:15 > 0:13:18Oh, nice. Side saddle.

0:13:20 > 0:13:22I think Jackie's mistaken this for the

0:13:22 > 0:13:26'Idly Rubbing Your Thighs On A Large Cylindrical Foam Pad' round.

0:13:26 > 0:13:27Easily done.

0:13:28 > 0:13:32Jeff banked the internet radio and now he's at the Pole. Come on, Jeff.

0:13:32 > 0:13:33Don't be coy.

0:13:34 > 0:13:35Ooh.

0:13:37 > 0:13:39Oh, no! Hook, line and stinker.

0:13:42 > 0:13:45Right, let's see if he can tackle the bream.

0:13:45 > 0:13:48Ah, nice one, Ash. Maybe Jeff's had his chips?

0:13:49 > 0:13:50Yes, yes, he has.

0:13:52 > 0:13:53Oh, is he stuck?

0:13:54 > 0:13:56It's not as easy as it looks.

0:13:57 > 0:14:00Is it going to be over and trout, for Jeff?

0:14:02 > 0:14:04Jeff at the slide.

0:14:04 > 0:14:06# ..when the boat comes in... #

0:14:06 > 0:14:09Oh, so Jeff missed the espresso machine and the barbecue

0:14:09 > 0:14:12but he banked the family tent and stops the clock

0:14:12 > 0:14:15at 11.44, including penalties.

0:14:15 > 0:14:19Very clever. Must be 'well-schooled'. Sorry. Sorry.

0:14:19 > 0:14:20Oh, poor Jackie.

0:14:20 > 0:14:23Looks like the Wall of Doom is doing exactly what it says on the tin.

0:14:23 > 0:14:26Let's put a lid on that.

0:14:26 > 0:14:29This plucky fellow is Richard from Antrim.

0:14:29 > 0:14:32He lives by his own rules, nobody else's.

0:14:32 > 0:14:36Richard, your motto apparently is to kiss yourself. What does that mean?

0:14:36 > 0:14:41- It means keep it simple, stupid. - "Keep it simple, stupid." I like it.

0:14:41 > 0:14:44Can't think of a better strategy for this course.

0:14:44 > 0:14:45Shoot Out!

0:14:45 > 0:14:47KLAXON BLARES

0:14:47 > 0:14:49CHEERING

0:14:49 > 0:14:52I knew I was going to like this guy a lot

0:14:52 > 0:14:56- when he turned up with those jazzy leg warmers.- Look at him go.

0:14:56 > 0:14:59Remember, keep it simple, Richard.

0:14:59 > 0:15:02- Cross trainer banked.- Yes. Go on!

0:15:02 > 0:15:03New York in the bag.

0:15:04 > 0:15:06Aaaaah!

0:15:06 > 0:15:08Yes! Woohoo!

0:15:08 > 0:15:12- Stays dry - mainly.- Stack 'Em High now.- Come on, Richard.

0:15:12 > 0:15:15This is absurd, he's so fast. Woohoo!

0:15:15 > 0:15:16Internet radio banked.

0:15:16 > 0:15:19Richard making it all look very simple so far.

0:15:19 > 0:15:23- Like a cat.- He's so agile he could probably leap...- Like a cat.

0:15:23 > 0:15:26Wall of Doom, kiss goodbye.

0:15:28 > 0:15:30I wouldn't try kissing this if I were you.

0:15:37 > 0:15:40# Crying over you... #

0:15:40 > 0:15:42What a smacker.

0:15:44 > 0:15:48# Crying over you... #

0:15:48 > 0:15:51Should have kept it simple, Richard.

0:15:52 > 0:15:54- Richard, are you all right, my darling?- Yeah.

0:15:54 > 0:15:57# Simply irresistible... #

0:15:57 > 0:16:01- He is absolutely fine. - What's he made of?

0:16:01 > 0:16:03Oooooh! Wow!

0:16:03 > 0:16:06Oh, no! Ohhhhh!

0:16:06 > 0:16:08Oh, no, he was doing so well!

0:16:08 > 0:16:11# Simply irresistible... #

0:16:13 > 0:16:16- Ah, a simple error. - Just got cocky at the end.

0:16:16 > 0:16:18I'm just... I'm actually speechless.

0:16:20 > 0:16:22What is this guy made of?

0:16:22 > 0:16:25Just a slide and the espresso machine and the BBQ.

0:16:25 > 0:16:27Oh, he's kissed them both goodbye.

0:16:27 > 0:16:28HOOTER SOUNDS

0:16:28 > 0:16:33However, he banks the family tent and stops the clock at 3:25.

0:16:33 > 0:16:34Phew. I need a cup of tea.

0:16:34 > 0:16:36Are you all right after that Pole?

0:16:36 > 0:16:40That was quite an incredible fall off the Pole there, backwards.

0:16:40 > 0:16:42You just threw yourself at it.

0:16:42 > 0:16:46I kind of gave it a little push and then I jumped it and it went,

0:16:46 > 0:16:48whoops, it ain't happening.

0:16:48 > 0:16:51- Legs over.- You are superhuman.

0:16:51 > 0:16:53Keep it simple.

0:16:53 > 0:16:56Richard blasts through to the top spot with a time of 3:25.

0:16:56 > 0:17:00Queen Bee Tegan buzzes into second place, over two minutes behind him.

0:17:00 > 0:17:01Honest Pete shoots into fourth

0:17:01 > 0:17:03and Jeff the Salmon takes fifth.

0:17:03 > 0:17:04Jackie takes sixth place

0:17:04 > 0:17:07and I actually think she's still at the Wall of Doom.

0:17:09 > 0:17:11Still to come on Can't Touch This...

0:17:11 > 0:17:13The Freaky Eater,

0:17:13 > 0:17:15the Big Dipper,

0:17:15 > 0:17:18the Dart, and the Colonel.

0:17:20 > 0:17:24Will any of them make the top six and go on to leap for that car?

0:17:31 > 0:17:33This is Tom from London.

0:17:33 > 0:17:35Tom dreams about being in a musical,

0:17:35 > 0:17:38so we're about to make his dreams come true.

0:17:39 > 0:17:41Curtain's up.

0:17:43 > 0:17:45Aaaaah!

0:17:45 > 0:17:46Oh, bravo, Tom!

0:17:46 > 0:17:48THEY LAUGH

0:17:48 > 0:17:52- The vocals are out already. - Tom is at the Travelator.

0:17:52 > 0:17:55Oooh! Upstaged by a travelator.

0:17:57 > 0:18:00- Ohhhh!- Can he get up and make a recovery? Ohhh! No!

0:18:00 > 0:18:02Nearly.

0:18:02 > 0:18:04- He stopped himself again. - He's got wet feet.

0:18:04 > 0:18:06He's got one wet shoe. Only one wet shoe.

0:18:06 > 0:18:08He really wants that trip to New York!

0:18:10 > 0:18:13# New York, New York It's a wonderful town... #

0:18:13 > 0:18:16- He's going again. - He wants that trip to New York.

0:18:16 > 0:18:18Ohhh!

0:18:21 > 0:18:24Ooooh!

0:18:24 > 0:18:25So no trip to New York, no Broadway,

0:18:25 > 0:18:29but I hear Russ Abbott is still on in Derby, so you know...

0:18:29 > 0:18:32Tom banked the radio so he could listen to his dance number...

0:18:32 > 0:18:34With the Pole!

0:18:34 > 0:18:36Ohhhhhh!

0:18:36 > 0:18:37Hard.

0:18:37 > 0:18:39Ouch.

0:18:39 > 0:18:41Oh, encore!

0:18:41 > 0:18:43That looks sore.

0:18:43 > 0:18:45Ouch!

0:18:45 > 0:18:48It's a fall of biblical proportions there from Tom.

0:18:48 > 0:18:51Tom's at the Beam now.

0:18:51 > 0:18:52Prepare yourself, Thomas.

0:18:52 > 0:18:56- The punch bags are... - Oooooh! Misses number one.

0:18:56 > 0:18:58The second is coming.

0:18:58 > 0:19:01- Oh!- Some adoring fans in those punch bags.

0:19:01 > 0:19:03They only want to touch him.

0:19:03 > 0:19:05Here we go, the third.

0:19:05 > 0:19:08# Consider yourself well in... #

0:19:08 > 0:19:09Oh, he's banked the camera

0:19:09 > 0:19:12but no flash photography in the auditorium, please.

0:19:12 > 0:19:15Or on the motorway. More safety tips later.

0:19:15 > 0:19:16Ohhh! Just missed him.

0:19:16 > 0:19:18Narrow escape.

0:19:18 > 0:19:21Now it's the Slide.

0:19:21 > 0:19:24He bags the barbecue and the espresso machine

0:19:24 > 0:19:26and picks up a family tent award.

0:19:28 > 0:19:30We add one 30-second penalty,

0:19:30 > 0:19:33making Tom's time 4:19, a promising debut.

0:19:33 > 0:19:35No autographs please.

0:19:35 > 0:19:36- How much fun was that?- So much fun.

0:19:36 > 0:19:40When you hit the water for the first time it just knocks the air

0:19:40 > 0:19:41out of you.

0:19:41 > 0:19:44This is Umar, a student from Manchester who is obsessed with,

0:19:44 > 0:19:45wait for it...

0:19:45 > 0:19:48Various kinds of cooked chicken.

0:19:48 > 0:19:49I'm a big meat lover myself,

0:19:49 > 0:19:51I'm just wondering what are some of your favourites?

0:19:51 > 0:19:54- Fried chicken, cold chicken. - OK.- You know, the most.

0:19:54 > 0:19:58Cheryl from Londonderry has an even stranger obsession,

0:19:58 > 0:19:59eating whole chicken cubes.

0:19:59 > 0:20:01What do you think of that, Umar?

0:20:02 > 0:20:05Not amused. Chicken run! Umar!

0:20:05 > 0:20:09I think the longest recorded chicken flight is 13 seconds.

0:20:09 > 0:20:11You're joking.

0:20:11 > 0:20:14Chicken cubes, I wonder if she has one in her mouth right now.

0:20:14 > 0:20:17Oooo-eee! No.

0:20:20 > 0:20:22Woohoo!

0:20:22 > 0:20:24# ..for Umar.... #

0:20:26 > 0:20:27Shake a tail feather, Cheryl.

0:20:27 > 0:20:30Ohhh!

0:20:30 > 0:20:32If she was a chicken, I'm sure she'd be gutted.

0:20:35 > 0:20:38- Can he do the chicken run? - Can he do the chicken run?

0:20:38 > 0:20:40Um, no, he can't.

0:20:44 > 0:20:47Come on, Cheryl, time to strut your stuff.

0:20:49 > 0:20:51Oh, dear!

0:20:51 > 0:20:52And back in the soup.

0:20:54 > 0:20:57Some people say Stack 'Em High is easy.

0:20:57 > 0:20:58But talk is cheap.

0:20:58 > 0:21:00No, he's a no.

0:21:02 > 0:21:05- Good choices there with the pieces. - Pretty good.- Yeah.

0:21:05 > 0:21:08Careful, Cheryl, don't 'poulet' muscle.

0:21:08 > 0:21:10Sorry. That was a 'fowl' joke.

0:21:10 > 0:21:12- Yay!- Banked the internet radio.

0:21:17 > 0:21:20Ohhh! Ohhh!

0:21:20 > 0:21:22- Oh, no, Umar, go on.- Go on!

0:21:22 > 0:21:25- Keep your balance.- Go on.- Yes!

0:21:31 > 0:21:34- Ohhh! Look at that. - I really do think that was possible.

0:21:34 > 0:21:35How deep is that?

0:21:35 > 0:21:38Look, he's seen the Pole, he's chickened out.

0:21:38 > 0:21:40It's deep enough, if you fall in.

0:21:41 > 0:21:44Think of it like a massive kebab.

0:21:44 > 0:21:45Oh, skewered.

0:21:51 > 0:21:55- Well tried, Umar.- You all right, Umar?- Oh, here we go.

0:21:55 > 0:21:58Cheryl 'taking stock' of the situation.

0:22:01 > 0:22:04- Ahhhhh! - And into the fryer she goes.

0:22:04 > 0:22:06I think it's time to kick the ridiculous up a notch.

0:22:06 > 0:22:10SONG: Chick, Chick, Chick, Chick, Chicken

0:22:10 > 0:22:11Chicken wing.

0:22:11 > 0:22:16# Chick, chick, chick, chick, chicken, I want one for my tea... #

0:22:17 > 0:22:20Oh!

0:22:20 > 0:22:24Oh, oh! Umar, amazing! Amazing!

0:22:24 > 0:22:26# ..lay a little egg for me

0:22:29 > 0:22:31# Lay a little egg for me

0:22:31 > 0:22:34# Cock-a-doodle-doodle-doo Lay a little egg for me. #

0:22:34 > 0:22:36- Yay!- He banks the camera.

0:22:36 > 0:22:38Umar on the Slide now.

0:22:40 > 0:22:42He banks the BBQ, that's something to crow about.

0:22:42 > 0:22:46And stops the clock with 7:34, including penalties.

0:22:46 > 0:22:49# Do the funky chicken now... #

0:22:49 > 0:22:51Cheryl banks both prizes

0:22:51 > 0:22:54and rules the roost with a time of 6:08 including penalties.

0:22:56 > 0:22:57Cheryl, how was that?

0:22:57 > 0:23:00Ohhh, I'm exhausted.

0:23:00 > 0:23:03- I'm not surprised. It's tough. Good fun?- Good fun but it's exhausting.

0:23:03 > 0:23:05Think about the chicken you can grill on that barbecue.

0:23:05 > 0:23:06Let's go get some later.

0:23:09 > 0:23:13This cheerful face belongs to Aimee Smith, a lovely Brummee Mummee.

0:23:13 > 0:23:15Also known as The Completer.

0:23:15 > 0:23:18Now, Aimee, I understand you're called The Completer

0:23:18 > 0:23:22because you always see things through to the end so how determined

0:23:22 > 0:23:24- are you to finish the course today? - I'm in it to win it.

0:23:24 > 0:23:27I need to catapult my booty because I'm after that looty.

0:23:27 > 0:23:29Shocker!

0:23:31 > 0:23:33Catapult that booty!

0:23:33 > 0:23:34To win that looty!

0:23:34 > 0:23:36She's in.

0:23:36 > 0:23:39- Can she get that booty out of the foam?- She's in deep.

0:23:39 > 0:23:42- Yes, she's out!- She emerges

0:23:42 > 0:23:43from the foam like a goddess.

0:23:45 > 0:23:48Cross trainer incomplete.

0:23:48 > 0:23:51She doesn't need a cross trainer anyway. She goes to clubercise.

0:23:51 > 0:23:53Which is exercise in the dark with glow sticks.

0:23:53 > 0:23:55Amazing. I'm well up for that.

0:23:55 > 0:23:57Trip to New York, incomplete.

0:23:58 > 0:24:00She just lays down.

0:24:00 > 0:24:03I know, The Completer is not managing to complete!

0:24:03 > 0:24:05Stack 'Em High.

0:24:05 > 0:24:07# I'll climb any mountain. #

0:24:07 > 0:24:09- BOING! - Oh, dear.

0:24:09 > 0:24:11Aimee is The Incompleter, one of the less famous

0:24:11 > 0:24:12superhero characters.

0:24:12 > 0:24:14Oh! She goes off face first.

0:24:16 > 0:24:18She's back again.

0:24:18 > 0:24:20And finally that's complete.

0:24:21 > 0:24:22OK, The Pole. Hmmm.

0:24:25 > 0:24:27She's going for it.

0:24:28 > 0:24:30SCREAMING

0:24:30 > 0:24:32# Never gonna give you up... #

0:24:32 > 0:24:34Completed!

0:24:34 > 0:24:38In the not-completed sense of the word.

0:24:38 > 0:24:39The Beam now.

0:24:39 > 0:24:41# Nothing's gonna stop us now. #

0:24:41 > 0:24:43Course defeater, Aimee the Completer.

0:24:43 > 0:24:45Oh, Zoe the rapper.

0:24:45 > 0:24:48I'd really like to meet her

0:24:48 > 0:24:51and then I'm going to treat her.

0:24:51 > 0:24:52And I will never beat her.

0:24:56 > 0:24:58Lost the Beam. No!

0:24:58 > 0:24:59# Never gonna give you up

0:24:59 > 0:25:01# Never gonna let you down. #

0:25:01 > 0:25:04Aimee the Completer, the course defeater,

0:25:04 > 0:25:07went on the Beam and it could have been neater.

0:25:07 > 0:25:10OK, Ash, she had a bash. Aimee, did you have fun?

0:25:10 > 0:25:11Ah, I'm done.

0:25:11 > 0:25:13I know how you feel, love.

0:25:13 > 0:25:16I read out leaderboards with my life.

0:25:16 > 0:25:18Still in at the top is 'Keep It Simple' Richard

0:25:18 > 0:25:19with 3:25,

0:25:19 > 0:25:22followed closely by Tommy the Musical.

0:25:22 > 0:25:23Honest Pete is ripe

0:25:23 > 0:25:25for relegation at 6th place.

0:25:25 > 0:25:26Sadly, Jeff the salmon

0:25:26 > 0:25:27has gone off.

0:25:29 > 0:25:31This is Big Chris from Manchester.

0:25:31 > 0:25:33And this is Junior from Essex,

0:25:33 > 0:25:35so one of their parents has a sense of humour.

0:25:35 > 0:25:37# Mr Big Stuff... #

0:25:37 > 0:25:38Let's get ready for...

0:25:40 > 0:25:41Let's go.

0:25:42 > 0:25:44Hurt them on telly!

0:25:44 > 0:25:45- BUZZER - Is he going to go deep?

0:25:48 > 0:25:51- He's a big guy, is Chris. - I know, he is.

0:25:51 > 0:25:54Chris is out of the foam and off to the Travelator.

0:25:55 > 0:25:57Can he bank the cross trainer?

0:25:57 > 0:26:00Yes! He's banked the cross trainer.

0:26:01 > 0:26:05Wow, cross trainer! Boom boom.

0:26:05 > 0:26:06Oh!

0:26:08 > 0:26:09Oh!

0:26:10 > 0:26:12Oh, no, big Chris missed out on the Big Apple.

0:26:12 > 0:26:16Junior now. Tiny little man.

0:26:16 > 0:26:18I've got high hopes for him.

0:26:18 > 0:26:20Yeah, good. Oh, go on, Junior, go on!

0:26:22 > 0:26:24Trip to New York in the bank!

0:26:24 > 0:26:26Legs like gritting lorries.

0:26:26 > 0:26:28One giant leap.

0:26:28 > 0:26:29Aw!

0:26:31 > 0:26:34Big Chris at Stack 'Em High now, can he bank the internet radio?

0:26:34 > 0:26:36Boom!

0:26:36 > 0:26:39Which is coincidently my favourite grime station.

0:26:39 > 0:26:41Junior's at Stack 'Em High.

0:26:41 > 0:26:43They're massive neck and massive neck.

0:26:43 > 0:26:46He's not even stepping up, he's leaping up.

0:26:46 > 0:26:48BOING!

0:26:48 > 0:26:50I like his style.

0:26:50 > 0:26:52And he's also banked the radio.

0:26:52 > 0:26:53Chris at the Pole.

0:26:53 > 0:26:56# At first I was afraid, I was petrified

0:26:56 > 0:26:59# Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side... #

0:26:59 > 0:27:00Can he tame it?

0:27:02 > 0:27:03Ooh!

0:27:06 > 0:27:08No, he can't even tame his own hair.

0:27:11 > 0:27:13GROANING

0:27:13 > 0:27:15Junior's at the Slide, can he bank

0:27:15 > 0:27:18the espresso machine and the barbecue?

0:27:18 > 0:27:20Yes, he can!

0:27:20 > 0:27:22And that family tent he's always dreamed of.

0:27:22 > 0:27:25- BUZZER - Woo!

0:27:25 > 0:27:27All prizes banked and an astonishing time

0:27:27 > 0:27:29of 3:21.

0:27:29 > 0:27:31But is it enough to beat Chris?

0:27:31 > 0:27:34How was that for you? Did you enjoy that?

0:27:34 > 0:27:37It was good. This pool was not warm.

0:27:37 > 0:27:39- Well done, Junior, good work. - Cheers.

0:27:39 > 0:27:44Just the slide left. Can Chris bank the espresso machine and barbecue?

0:27:44 > 0:27:46Espresso machine banked. He can go large on those lattes.

0:27:46 > 0:27:47BUZZER

0:27:47 > 0:27:50He banks the tent and stops the clock at 4:12.

0:27:50 > 0:27:53- You're looking a bit smaller. - Are you kneeling down there?

0:27:53 > 0:27:56- Yes, sorry.- Oh, there it is, there's the height! How tall are you?

0:27:56 > 0:27:58- 6'5".- 6'5".

0:27:58 > 0:28:00Just not big enough to beat Junior.

0:28:00 > 0:28:02CHEERING

0:28:04 > 0:28:05Junior is now the big man

0:28:05 > 0:28:06in the top spot.

0:28:06 > 0:28:08Chris also makes the leaderboard,

0:28:08 > 0:28:10but we lose Pete and Kirsty.

0:28:12 > 0:28:14Meet Phai Dip. Say hello, Phai.

0:28:15 > 0:28:18Now, Phai, I'm told you can cry on demand.

0:28:18 > 0:28:21- That is an impressive skill. - It's a good talent isn't it?

0:28:21 > 0:28:23- It's useful.- It's very useful when you want something.

0:28:23 > 0:28:25So, do you think there will be any real tears tonight?

0:28:25 > 0:28:29- Tears of joy.- Phai, best of luck. Off to the catapult.- Thank you.

0:28:29 > 0:28:31Phai-r him!

0:28:31 > 0:28:33- BUZZER - That's his name, you see.

0:28:33 > 0:28:35# It's my party and I'll cry if I want to... #

0:28:35 > 0:28:37Whoa, in goes Phai.

0:28:37 > 0:28:38De-Phai-ing gravity.

0:28:38 > 0:28:40De-Phai-ing gravity there.

0:28:41 > 0:28:43Has the surname "Dip".

0:28:43 > 0:28:46- So Dip by name... - Which he's going to do right now.

0:28:48 > 0:28:50..and Dip by getting his bum wet.

0:28:50 > 0:28:52Phai Dip takes a dip.

0:28:52 > 0:28:54If you thought Phai's name was good for puns...

0:28:54 > 0:28:56meet Paige!

0:28:57 > 0:29:00First touch point for Paige.

0:29:00 > 0:29:04# They call me hell, they call me Stacey, they call me her... #

0:29:04 > 0:29:06It's a long way there for Paige.

0:29:06 > 0:29:08First page is always a struggle.

0:29:08 > 0:29:11She came off the travelator there. She stayed dry.

0:29:11 > 0:29:13Trip to New York.

0:29:13 > 0:29:16# They call me quiet but I'm a riot... #

0:29:16 > 0:29:20And Paige is wet, which serves me right for reading The Great Gatsby

0:29:20 > 0:29:22in this geothermal hot spring.

0:29:23 > 0:29:25Phai's going for New York now.

0:29:25 > 0:29:27He's not letting it...

0:29:27 > 0:29:28Oh!

0:29:30 > 0:29:31Keep going, go on, go on.

0:29:31 > 0:29:33Oh, and...

0:29:34 > 0:29:35..the double dip.

0:29:35 > 0:29:38Well, Paige missed the cross trainer and the trip to New York.

0:29:38 > 0:29:40Is she on the right page?

0:29:40 > 0:29:43- Hey!- Hey, thank you.

0:29:44 > 0:29:45That's one page joke.

0:29:47 > 0:29:50Oh, she's gone for the full stack.

0:29:50 > 0:29:51Gosh, oh, gosh, Paige.

0:29:51 > 0:29:54- Yes, banked. - Well done!

0:29:56 > 0:29:58Back with Phai.

0:29:58 > 0:30:02And his tattoo, coincidently, reads "terrible balance" in Sanskrit.

0:30:02 > 0:30:04Oh, my...

0:30:06 > 0:30:08Now, taking a tumble is pretty much par for the course

0:30:08 > 0:30:10at Can't Touch This.

0:30:10 > 0:30:12So, now's a good time to let me introduce...

0:30:14 > 0:30:17If you suddenly find yourself on a televisualised assault course,

0:30:17 > 0:30:19you'll probably end up being a fall guy.

0:30:19 > 0:30:21Here are some tips to help you through.

0:30:21 > 0:30:24One - adopt a positive mental attitude.

0:30:24 > 0:30:26Oh, there's no way is, there?

0:30:26 > 0:30:27Oh, this is horrible!

0:30:27 > 0:30:30How deep is that?

0:30:30 > 0:30:34Two - if you do fall, try and roll with it.

0:30:35 > 0:30:37SHRIEK

0:30:38 > 0:30:41Three - style counts for everything.

0:30:43 > 0:30:46But if all the above fails, whatever you do, don't try

0:30:46 > 0:30:47and land on your head...

0:30:49 > 0:30:51..or your face...

0:30:53 > 0:30:55..or your chin...

0:30:55 > 0:30:56or your bottom.

0:30:56 > 0:30:57Ow!

0:30:59 > 0:31:02Follow the above tips and soon you be hitting the mark again,

0:31:02 > 0:31:05again, again, and again.

0:31:08 > 0:31:10Back with Phai now.

0:31:10 > 0:31:13Bounce.

0:31:13 > 0:31:15Yes!

0:31:15 > 0:31:16Where did he go?

0:31:16 > 0:31:18Banked the internet radio.

0:31:18 > 0:31:20Paige at the Pole now.

0:31:20 > 0:31:21Holy crap.

0:31:36 > 0:31:40- A chance to catch her breath. - Rebound off the Pole vault there.

0:31:40 > 0:31:41What can Phai do?

0:31:41 > 0:31:44He's going to take a Phai Dip.

0:31:45 > 0:31:48- SQUEAK - Oh!

0:31:48 > 0:31:49Boss it.

0:31:56 > 0:31:59Phai defeated the Beam, just the espresso machine and barbecue now.

0:31:59 > 0:32:01Oh, no, he misses them both

0:32:01 > 0:32:05and stops the clock with a time of 6:48 including penalties.

0:32:05 > 0:32:07Just the slide for Paige now.

0:32:09 > 0:32:12She also misses both touch points but bags the tent

0:32:12 > 0:32:16and stops the clock with a time of 7:54 including penalties.

0:32:16 > 0:32:20- Paige.- Hi, Ashley. - You completed it.- Just.

0:32:20 > 0:32:23I got hit in the face. It took my breath away completely.

0:32:23 > 0:32:26On the Pole vault. Yeah. Yeah, you slipped right off it. Boing!

0:32:26 > 0:32:29- I just whacked it. - Knocked you right in the face.

0:32:29 > 0:32:30Sadly Phai and Paige

0:32:30 > 0:32:32don't make the leaderboard.

0:32:32 > 0:32:34But Junior still stays at number one.

0:32:34 > 0:32:36Tegan is in sixth place

0:32:36 > 0:32:39but with one contestant left she's in danger of buzzing off.

0:32:41 > 0:32:45So it's goodbye to Chicken King Umar. Plucked in his prime.

0:32:46 > 0:32:50It's a cheerio to cheerleader Kirsty and her pants.

0:32:50 > 0:32:52Honest Pete gets the red card.

0:32:53 > 0:32:56Angler Jeff, it's back to your spawning ground.

0:32:56 > 0:32:57Aimee,

0:32:57 > 0:32:59Paige,

0:32:59 > 0:33:00Jackie

0:33:00 > 0:33:03and Phai, it's goodbye.

0:33:03 > 0:33:04Thanks, guys. It's been touching.

0:33:06 > 0:33:09Now, this Silver Fox is 55-year-old Eugene from Dungannon.

0:33:10 > 0:33:14Eugene, you like to keep your body and mind in check by playing darts.

0:33:14 > 0:33:16Will you fly like an arrow around the course tonight?

0:33:16 > 0:33:19It should be easy today. I think I'll go for two treble 20s,

0:33:19 > 0:33:20and a bull's-eye to finish.

0:33:20 > 0:33:24I can't wait. Get you to the catapult. Good luck, my darling.

0:33:24 > 0:33:25Throw!

0:33:27 > 0:33:29- Bull's-eye!- And he's off.

0:33:30 > 0:33:33Silver Fox, Eugene, has banked the trip to New York so far

0:33:33 > 0:33:35and darts straight over to Stack 'Em High.

0:33:35 > 0:33:38Impressive start.

0:33:41 > 0:33:43- Sturdy.- Easy!

0:33:43 > 0:33:46Internet radio, in the bank.

0:33:46 > 0:33:47Oh, no, he's hit a wall.

0:33:49 > 0:33:52He's an advert for us all to get out and do some fitness.

0:33:52 > 0:33:54Exactly.

0:33:54 > 0:33:56Out of the foxhole and up to the Pole.

0:33:56 > 0:33:57Look at this, he's flying.

0:33:59 > 0:34:03After an impressive start, how will Eugene tackle the Pole?

0:34:03 > 0:34:04Like a fox.

0:34:07 > 0:34:09180 degree spin around the Pole.

0:34:09 > 0:34:10Classic.

0:34:12 > 0:34:15- Are you all right there, Eugene? - Yeah, cool.- Yes, he's good.

0:34:15 > 0:34:18He's a soldier. Keep going, Eugene.

0:34:19 > 0:34:22Eugene on the Beam now.

0:34:23 > 0:34:30Oh, my goodness, he is a superhero!

0:34:30 > 0:34:32- He forgot the touch point. - He doesn't want that.

0:34:32 > 0:34:35He doesn't even need that prize. Camera? He's got loads.

0:34:35 > 0:34:37It's the Silver Fox on the slide.

0:34:37 > 0:34:40All he has to do it beat Tegan's time of 5.30

0:34:40 > 0:34:42to get in the top six.

0:34:42 > 0:34:45Misses the double top but he does nab the tent

0:34:45 > 0:34:47and stops the clock for a total of

0:34:47 > 0:34:494 minutes, 49 seconds with penalties

0:34:49 > 0:34:52and that's enough to get him in the top six.

0:34:55 > 0:34:58What a noisy bunch they were today. It was like being at the zoo.

0:34:58 > 0:35:02- Very noisy indeed.- Whatever helps you along the way though.

0:35:02 > 0:35:04Strong performances on the Travelator,

0:35:04 > 0:35:07particularly Richard and Tom.

0:35:07 > 0:35:09Only the six fastest progress to round two.

0:35:09 > 0:35:11Let's check out who has made it through.

0:35:13 > 0:35:16In at number one is Junior with a time of 3:21.

0:35:16 > 0:35:20The number two slot is 'Keep It Simple' Richard with 3:25.

0:35:20 > 0:35:23Big Chris is third with 4:12.

0:35:23 > 0:35:26It's a sad tale for Tommy the Musical.

0:35:26 > 0:35:28He picked up an injury during the performance

0:35:28 > 0:35:30and won't be joining us for act two.

0:35:30 > 0:35:34So into fourth place goes silver fox Eugene, with a time of 4:49.

0:35:34 > 0:35:38Cheryl is fifth with a time of 5:08.

0:35:38 > 0:35:41And the next fastest time after Cheryl is Queen Bee Tegan

0:35:41 > 0:35:44so she replaces Tommy in the final six.

0:35:50 > 0:35:53This round is another test of speed, agility and nerves.

0:35:53 > 0:35:57And it's very simple. It starts with six and it ends with three.

0:35:57 > 0:36:00It all kicks off on Spinning Platforms,

0:36:00 > 0:36:03which, as you can imagine, start spinning.

0:36:03 > 0:36:05From the platforms, contestants move on to Clamber Crossing.

0:36:05 > 0:36:09They clamber across the crossing, hence the name,

0:36:09 > 0:36:10to a set of touch points

0:36:10 > 0:36:12which banks the games console.

0:36:12 > 0:36:14But there are only five touch points,

0:36:14 > 0:36:17so one contestant will miss out and leave the game.

0:36:17 > 0:36:20After a very quick sit down, they're off again, through the water

0:36:20 > 0:36:22and up the uneven stairs, to the rings,

0:36:22 > 0:36:25as they attempt to make their way to the four touch points to bank

0:36:25 > 0:36:26the tennis rackets.

0:36:28 > 0:36:31Five into four don't go, so another contestant will be eliminated,

0:36:31 > 0:36:34before they set off again to the Dropping Ropes.

0:36:34 > 0:36:37It's an odd but apt name as not all the ropes are connected.

0:36:37 > 0:36:39So contestants must choose the right one to

0:36:39 > 0:36:42swing across to the pontoon, otherwise they drop.

0:36:42 > 0:36:45Finally, they make their way to the end podium, and bank a laptop.

0:36:45 > 0:36:47But there only three touch points,

0:36:47 > 0:36:49which means another contestant will be eliminated

0:36:49 > 0:36:51leaving our final three.

0:36:51 > 0:36:53Have they been spinning all this time?

0:36:53 > 0:36:56I'm so sorry. I was just putting my hair into a beehive.

0:36:56 > 0:36:58The bees weren't happy at all.

0:36:58 > 0:37:00Anyway, let's get started.

0:37:00 > 0:37:03- Their heads are spinning, their legs are wobbling.- I think it's time.

0:37:03 > 0:37:05- Cue the klaxon. - KLAXON

0:37:05 > 0:37:07And they're off!

0:37:08 > 0:37:09Richard's right through.

0:37:09 > 0:37:11Even got time for some acrobatics.

0:37:12 > 0:37:14Oh, beautifully done.

0:37:14 > 0:37:17And he banks the games console. Boom! Simples.

0:37:17 > 0:37:19Silver Fox Eugene is next.

0:37:19 > 0:37:22Junior, then Big Chris.

0:37:22 > 0:37:25Queen Bee Tegan banks the console as well.

0:37:25 > 0:37:26Cheryl?

0:37:26 > 0:37:28What have you done with Cheryl?

0:37:28 > 0:37:30Cheryl, what are you doing, my lovely?

0:37:30 > 0:37:32Oh, she thinks it's a hammock.

0:37:32 > 0:37:34Care to see that again?

0:37:34 > 0:37:36Cheryl gets tangled up with Big Chris.

0:37:36 > 0:37:38Well, only one outcome there, really.

0:37:38 > 0:37:42It would actually appear that Cheryl actually fell into Big Chris's shoe.

0:37:42 > 0:37:44What dreadful luck.

0:37:45 > 0:37:48Ah, that's Cheryl's Prince Charming to Chris's Cinders.

0:37:48 > 0:37:50Thank you, Cheryl.

0:37:50 > 0:37:52Still not going to get to the ball.

0:37:53 > 0:37:55Just relax guys because...

0:37:55 > 0:37:56I'm going to tip your chairs!

0:37:59 > 0:38:02'Keep It Simple' Richard's off first and he's up the stairs.

0:38:05 > 0:38:07Richard is first to the rings.

0:38:08 > 0:38:09Oh, no!

0:38:12 > 0:38:14Oh, no, he didn't keep it simple.

0:38:14 > 0:38:16Richard!

0:38:16 > 0:38:18- Oh!- OK.

0:38:20 > 0:38:21Oh, and he's up.

0:38:22 > 0:38:25And banks the rackets.

0:38:25 > 0:38:27So does Junior.

0:38:28 > 0:38:30Three left.

0:38:30 > 0:38:33Big Chris makes a run for it.

0:38:33 > 0:38:34Oh, no.

0:38:41 > 0:38:43All that man must be hard to hold up.

0:38:47 > 0:38:48You can do it, Chris!

0:38:48 > 0:38:50Oh, no, Chris is down.

0:38:50 > 0:38:53We've lost Chris through the rings.

0:38:54 > 0:38:57Chris has got his shirt off and is riding in foam,

0:38:57 > 0:38:59just an ordinary evening in for him then.

0:38:59 > 0:39:01Can he get to the ladder in time to get back to the race?

0:39:01 > 0:39:03Tegan and Eugene are on fire!

0:39:03 > 0:39:05Now THAT would be a game show.

0:39:05 > 0:39:08- Is it going to be Tegan? - It's going to be Tegan and Eugene!

0:39:08 > 0:39:10Big Chris knows he can't make it.

0:39:10 > 0:39:13Silver Fox Eugene banks the rackets

0:39:13 > 0:39:14and so does Tegan.

0:39:15 > 0:39:19Bad luck, Big Chris. Man mountains of love, my friend.

0:39:20 > 0:39:23So six have become four and soon will become three.

0:39:23 > 0:39:25Did my agent negotiate that?

0:39:25 > 0:39:27One word for you guys. Watch out for the ropes!

0:39:28 > 0:39:29All right.

0:39:29 > 0:39:32Brilliant start for Keep it Simple Richard.

0:39:32 > 0:39:35Sorry, Richard. We did warn you about those ropes.

0:39:39 > 0:39:42He's so far ahead. Look at him go!

0:39:45 > 0:39:49Junior and Tegan have made our synchronised swimming team.

0:39:49 > 0:39:50Eugene!

0:39:50 > 0:39:51Eugene's found a dropping rope.

0:39:51 > 0:39:53Cool!

0:39:53 > 0:39:54Junior hits a wall.

0:39:56 > 0:39:58Come on, Tegan.

0:39:58 > 0:40:00Oh, such a buzz kill.

0:40:02 > 0:40:05Eugene just hanging around

0:40:05 > 0:40:07and very kindly passes the rope to Junior.

0:40:09 > 0:40:10But it doesn't help.

0:40:13 > 0:40:14Come on, help a man out.

0:40:14 > 0:40:16How kind, Richard.

0:40:16 > 0:40:18Easy to be kind, of course, when you're ahead.

0:40:18 > 0:40:22Come on, Tegan. You've got everything to play for.

0:40:22 > 0:40:25Will Silver Fox Eugene become a flying fox?

0:40:25 > 0:40:26Oh, Eugene!

0:40:26 > 0:40:27Come on, Eugene!

0:40:27 > 0:40:30He's in second, he banks the computer.

0:40:30 > 0:40:33Just Junior and Tegan now.

0:40:33 > 0:40:35I'm not sure they've got the hang of this.

0:40:35 > 0:40:38- Oh, no! - Oh, no, this is a proper battle.

0:40:38 > 0:40:40It couldn't be closer.

0:40:40 > 0:40:42Tegan takes the initiative and...

0:40:42 > 0:40:45she's going to beat Junior to last place.

0:40:45 > 0:40:47CHEERING

0:40:49 > 0:40:52Aw, cheer up, Junior. It might never... Oh, it has. Sorry.

0:40:52 > 0:40:56So, goodbye, Junior. You can hold your head up high.

0:40:56 > 0:40:58The ropes are a killer.

0:40:58 > 0:40:59They're harder than they look,

0:40:59 > 0:41:01especially when you fall in that water.

0:41:01 > 0:41:03There's minimal chance of you getting back up there.

0:41:03 > 0:41:07Bye-bye, Big Chris, all stonking 6'5" of you.

0:41:07 > 0:41:08The rings got the better of me.

0:41:08 > 0:41:09Just went bull in a china shop

0:41:09 > 0:41:11and obviously that wasn't the method.

0:41:11 > 0:41:13Slow and steady wins the race.

0:41:13 > 0:41:18I was left in the foam, absolutely wounded. Gutted.

0:41:18 > 0:41:19And it's ciao to Cheryl.

0:41:19 > 0:41:22Your stock has definitely gone up in our opinion.

0:41:22 > 0:41:23It's coming and having fun,

0:41:23 > 0:41:25and I got to the final six so it's fantastic.

0:41:25 > 0:41:29I'm definitely backing Tegan to jump for the car.

0:41:32 > 0:41:35They've all worked so hard to get here.

0:41:35 > 0:41:37But for two of them, it's the end of the road.

0:41:37 > 0:41:40Let's find out who's marching on to glory. It's time to climb.

0:41:45 > 0:41:47Spin Mountain is where three become one

0:41:47 > 0:41:51because, as we all know, there can be only be one!

0:41:51 > 0:41:53Each contestant has to find and collect their three uniquely

0:41:53 > 0:41:57coloured discs and return them to their podiums in order

0:41:57 > 0:41:59from these three rotating rings.

0:41:59 > 0:42:02Only then can they climb up Spin Mountain, which is spinning,

0:42:02 > 0:42:05to touch the touch point and bank a very nice quad bike.

0:42:05 > 0:42:09But watch out - some of those handholds are on bungee cords,

0:42:09 > 0:42:12which, all going well, will result in some full-on comedy bants.

0:42:12 > 0:42:14Well, we can always hope.

0:42:14 > 0:42:16And they're off!

0:42:16 > 0:42:19Richard's off to kiss the mountain.

0:42:19 > 0:42:20Tegan bumbles in.

0:42:23 > 0:42:26This reminds me of picking up my luggage at Luton after

0:42:26 > 0:42:27a weekend away with Zoe.

0:42:27 > 0:42:29Not really sure what Eugene is up to

0:42:29 > 0:42:31but Richard's already on his first disc.

0:42:33 > 0:42:34Oh, Tegan just misses hers.

0:42:36 > 0:42:38Thanks for joining us, Eugene.

0:42:41 > 0:42:42One down for Richard.

0:42:42 > 0:42:44Some garden-variety mayhem here.

0:42:45 > 0:42:47Disc two's in sight for Richard.

0:42:49 > 0:42:51Oh, did they rehearse that? Very deft.

0:42:52 > 0:42:55'Keep It Simple' Richard's already placing his second.

0:42:55 > 0:42:58Oh, this is embarrassing. Somebody throw in the towel.

0:42:58 > 0:42:59Eugene is on the board.

0:43:01 > 0:43:05Richard's already got his third disc and he's off to Spin Mountain.

0:43:08 > 0:43:11Might be too late, Tegan.

0:43:11 > 0:43:13Richard's right up it, no trouble!

0:43:13 > 0:43:15I think he's got one of these at home.

0:43:15 > 0:43:16We have a winner!

0:43:16 > 0:43:20'Keep It Simple' Richard has done it and banked the quad.

0:43:20 > 0:43:22Well done.

0:43:22 > 0:43:25- You were like Speedy Gonzales. Vroom!- How are you feeling?

0:43:25 > 0:43:28- I feel all right.- Oh, your voice has gone very high.- Aye!

0:43:28 > 0:43:31- I've been practising. - You've done it. Last one standing.

0:43:31 > 0:43:35Richard, you have worked so hard today to bank the prizes.

0:43:35 > 0:43:38But can Richard keep that winning streak going,

0:43:38 > 0:43:41touch those prizes and take them home? That is the question.

0:43:41 > 0:43:43Let's hope! Wooo! Come on!

0:43:43 > 0:43:45Wow. Gone deaf in one ear.

0:43:45 > 0:43:47He can definitely do this. It's time for the Travelator.

0:43:47 > 0:43:50It's official - Richard is the man of the mountain.

0:43:50 > 0:43:52Richard was so fast.

0:43:52 > 0:43:55I was lying on my back and he was just running circles round me.

0:43:55 > 0:43:58I never seen him from the start to the finish.

0:43:58 > 0:44:01- I look up and I already seen him sitting there.- Already won.

0:44:03 > 0:44:04I'm glad Richard got through.

0:44:04 > 0:44:08I couldn't think of a more dedicated guy to get through to the final.

0:44:08 > 0:44:09The best man won.

0:44:15 > 0:44:18So up here are all the prizes that Richard has banked tonight.

0:44:18 > 0:44:21- There's a cross trainer.- Trip to New York.- Internet radio.- A camera.

0:44:21 > 0:44:25- Family Tent.- Games console.- Tennis rackets.- Laptop.- And a quad bike.

0:44:25 > 0:44:27Wow. Just how many is Richard going home with?

0:44:29 > 0:44:32So I've hung all the prizes Richard banked in the previous

0:44:32 > 0:44:34rounds above this fast-moving Travelator.

0:44:34 > 0:44:37Richard has 60 seconds to touch as many of them as he can.

0:44:37 > 0:44:40Of course, everything he touches, he wins.

0:44:40 > 0:44:43All right, Richard. This is it. How you feeling?

0:44:43 > 0:44:46- Feeling great, feeling great. Ready to run.- I bet he is.- He is.

0:44:46 > 0:44:49- You know Richard is ready to run. - You can feel it, you can feel it.

0:44:49 > 0:44:53You have 60 seconds to touch and win your nine prizes.

0:44:53 > 0:44:54Good luck, Richard. Take your position.

0:44:54 > 0:44:56- Good luck, Richard.- Thank you.

0:44:58 > 0:45:00There they all are, Richard's banked prizes.

0:45:00 > 0:45:01It won't be easy.

0:45:03 > 0:45:06That's why we call this show Can't Touch This,

0:45:06 > 0:45:08not CAN Touch This.

0:45:09 > 0:45:10Cue the klaxon.

0:45:10 > 0:45:12KLAXON

0:45:13 > 0:45:14A blistering start.

0:45:14 > 0:45:16That's a double hit on the New York trip and quad bike.

0:45:16 > 0:45:19Games console and tennis rackets,

0:45:19 > 0:45:20followed smartly by the computer.

0:45:20 > 0:45:22He's not even going to need the full time.

0:45:22 > 0:45:24Cross trainer and internet radio.

0:45:24 > 0:45:26The camera and the family tent.

0:45:26 > 0:45:28That's nine prizes.

0:45:28 > 0:45:32You didn't even need the whole time we gave you. You did it in seconds.

0:45:32 > 0:45:34Oh, my goodness. It was unreal.

0:45:34 > 0:45:37Richard, I can tell you that you've won nine prizes.

0:45:37 > 0:45:39- Woo!- He's happy.

0:45:39 > 0:45:42Cross trainer, trip to New York, an internet radio, a camera,

0:45:42 > 0:45:46a family tent, a games console, tennis rackets, a laptop

0:45:46 > 0:45:47and a quad bike.

0:45:47 > 0:45:50There's one more thing that can make you happier. It's up there.

0:45:50 > 0:45:52- You know what it is, don't you? - Yeah, looking forward to this.

0:45:52 > 0:45:57Like everything you've won tonight, to win it, you've got to touch it.

0:45:57 > 0:46:00- How up for it are you? - I'm really up for it. Come on!

0:46:00 > 0:46:05Oh, my gosh. This guy. Let's jump for the car.

0:46:05 > 0:46:08If Richard can make one more fantastic leap

0:46:08 > 0:46:11and touch the car, he can drive it away...

0:46:11 > 0:46:14once he's detached it from our specialised lighting rig.

0:46:14 > 0:46:17OK, now we're standing up here and you can see it, it's just there,

0:46:17 > 0:46:19what are you thinking, Richard?

0:46:19 > 0:46:21What is your approach going to be?

0:46:21 > 0:46:24Jump as far as I can and fly like a bird.

0:46:24 > 0:46:27- I really want you to do it. Good luck, my darling.- Thank you.

0:46:27 > 0:46:28OK, get ready.

0:46:30 > 0:46:33So, here we go.

0:46:33 > 0:46:38One contestant, one car, one giant leap.

0:46:38 > 0:46:40Richard, best of luck.

0:46:40 > 0:46:43In your own time, jump for the car.

0:46:43 > 0:46:46Thank you. Ooh!

0:46:53 > 0:46:55One Jump.

0:46:55 > 0:46:57One chance.

0:46:57 > 0:46:58One car.

0:47:23 > 0:47:24KLAXON

0:47:34 > 0:47:37He did it! Richard has won himself a brand-new car!

0:47:37 > 0:47:38Effortless!

0:47:40 > 0:47:42CHEERING

0:47:42 > 0:47:44Well done, Richard!

0:47:44 > 0:47:46Cue the slow motion repeat.

0:47:46 > 0:47:49I want to watch this again and again and again.

0:47:53 > 0:47:56Hang on. I think this Betamax is stuck in a loop.

0:47:56 > 0:47:58Guys? Guys?!

0:47:58 > 0:47:59CHEERING

0:47:59 > 0:48:00Yeah, yeah!

0:48:02 > 0:48:04Well done, man! Well done!

0:48:04 > 0:48:07You're unbelievable. Never with one hand, with both hands.

0:48:07 > 0:48:11Unreal. That's unreal. I cannot believe that.

0:48:11 > 0:48:14How did that feel to run, jump off that platform and touch the car?

0:48:14 > 0:48:16Just fly and fall. Fly and fall.

0:48:16 > 0:48:20That is it until next time when we're back with more contestants,

0:48:20 > 0:48:22more prizes, and another touching show.

0:48:22 > 0:48:24Till then, stay in touch.

0:48:24 > 0:48:25Say goodbye, Sue.

0:48:25 > 0:48:28- Hello!- Bye, guys.- Unreal.

0:48:28 > 0:48:29Woo!