0:00:00 > 0:00:00- *
0:00:02 > 0:00:04- The Welsh family is changing.
0:00:05 > 0:00:07- Within the past half a century...
0:00:08 > 0:00:11- ..the traditional model - of Mam, Dad and 2.4 children...
0:00:11 > 0:00:13- ..has all but disappeared.
0:00:13 > 0:00:18- It has been replaced by an - altogether more contemporary unit.
0:00:18 > 0:00:21- One that's more complex - and colourful than before.
0:00:22 > 0:00:25- These are some of - the modern Welsh family's stories.
0:00:34 > 0:00:37- In percentage terms, - there are more divorcees in Wales...
0:00:38 > 0:00:40- ..than anywhere else in Britain.
0:00:40 > 0:00:45- One child in every three - is brought up in a stepfamily.
0:00:48 > 0:00:50- Erin is 16 years old.
0:00:50 > 0:00:55- Like many young people today, - she lives between two homes.
0:00:56 > 0:00:59- I'm in Mam's house at the moment.
0:00:59 > 0:01:02- She lives here with her boyfriend...
0:01:02 > 0:01:04- ..and my baby sister.
0:01:05 > 0:01:09- Dad shares his home - with my stepmother...
0:01:09 > 0:01:14- ..my two brothers - and another sister.
0:01:14 > 0:01:15- Who am I?
0:01:15 > 0:01:16- Who am I?- - Erin.
0:01:16 > 0:01:18- What am I?
0:01:19 > 0:01:21- My sister.
0:01:21 > 0:01:22- Lewis, say hiya.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24- Lewis, say hiya.- - Hi.
0:01:24 > 0:01:27- This is my bedroom at Dad's house.
0:01:27 > 0:01:32- I share my room with - my little sister at Dad's house.
0:01:33 > 0:01:36- I've a bed next to her cot.
0:01:41 > 0:01:45- Erin's parents - separated more than 10 years ago.
0:01:45 > 0:01:50- Since then, Erin's spent - most of her time with her mother.
0:01:50 > 0:01:54- It's just been Mam and me - for as long as I can remember.
0:01:54 > 0:01:57- I don't remember living with Dad.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59- About three years ago...
0:02:00 > 0:02:02- ..everything changed.
0:02:03 > 0:02:05- Mam found a boyfriend.
0:02:06 > 0:02:08- It was difficult for me...
0:02:09 > 0:02:11- ..to come to terms with Mam...
0:02:11 > 0:02:16- ..having to divide all her time - between two people.
0:02:16 > 0:02:19- I didn't like that.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22- But I don't expect Mam...
0:02:22 > 0:02:25- ..to be alone forever...
0:02:26 > 0:02:30- ..or surround herself with cats - until she dies...
0:02:30 > 0:02:32- ..like a crazy cat lady!
0:02:33 > 0:02:36- A few months ago, - another major event happened...
0:02:37 > 0:02:40- ..that would change - Erin's and her family's lives.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49- I'm at the hospital now. - I've come to visit Mam.
0:02:49 > 0:02:52- Her waters broke - at one o'clock yesterday morning...
0:02:52 > 0:02:56- ..but nothing's happened so far, - so we're just waiting.
0:02:57 > 0:03:01- This monitors the baby - and the contractions.
0:03:05 > 0:03:10- The nurse has just - fully broken my mother's waters...
0:03:11 > 0:03:16- ..but she's only - one centimetre dilated.
0:03:16 > 0:03:19- It's going to be a long night.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28- It's the following day.
0:03:28 > 0:03:34- Mam's been here for 29 hours.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37- They've just given her an epidural.
0:03:37 > 0:03:41- She's about six centimetres dilated.
0:03:41 > 0:03:48- We have to wait an hour - before checking her again...
0:03:48 > 0:03:52- ..to see how far along she is.
0:03:52 > 0:03:55- But hopefully - the baby'll be here soon...
0:03:55 > 0:03:58- ..and we can all go home to sleep!
0:04:04 > 0:04:07- The baby sister - is as pretty as a picture!
0:04:08 > 0:04:12- She came into the world - at a very busy time in Erin's life.
0:04:14 > 0:04:16- Science, Maths...
0:04:16 > 0:04:18- ..English, Welsh...
0:04:18 > 0:04:20- ..Religious Education.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23- In less than a month...
0:04:24 > 0:04:26- ..she will sit her GCSEs.
0:04:26 > 0:04:32- I hope to get - good results in science and maths...
0:04:32 > 0:04:35- ..because - I want to go to university...
0:04:35 > 0:04:40- ..to study forensic science.
0:04:40 > 0:04:42- I'll be glad once they're over.
0:04:53 > 0:04:57- In Cardiff, it's a big day - for everyone in Bea's family.
0:04:58 > 0:05:03- It's my big brother Alex's - 18th birthday.
0:05:04 > 0:05:09- The entire family's - coming over to celebrate.
0:05:09 > 0:05:13- The family is somewhat complicated.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19- That's my grandmother...
0:05:19 > 0:05:22- ..and my stepgrandfather Greg...
0:05:22 > 0:05:26- ..Mam, Imogen and me - and my stepfather John.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29- There he is.
0:05:29 > 0:05:30- Mum, what time's Dad coming?
0:05:30 > 0:05:32- Mum, what time's Dad coming?- - Eight.
0:05:38 > 0:05:42- Bea's parents - separated more then seven years ago.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46- I was four years old...
0:05:46 > 0:05:53- ..and they said, "We're going - to live apart from each other now.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56- "That's how it's going to be."
0:05:56 > 0:06:00- I didn't understand at all. - I didn't know what it meant.
0:06:00 > 0:06:04- When I was six, Mam - explained again and I understood.
0:06:06 > 0:06:11- One of the reasons Tim and I were - so keen to have an amicable spilt...
0:06:11 > 0:06:13- ..and to work well together...
0:06:13 > 0:06:17- ..because we've seen - so many other couples...
0:06:17 > 0:06:20- ..have a different scenario - and outcome.
0:06:20 > 0:06:23- We've seen the damage it can do - to the children.
0:06:23 > 0:06:27- You have to just, like...
0:06:28 > 0:06:31- ..accept the fact it's happening...
0:06:31 > 0:06:35- ..and not be sad about it - because there's no point.
0:06:35 > 0:06:37- Imogen, Bea, time to go!
0:06:39 > 0:06:43- You need to take your clarinet - and practise with Dad.
0:06:43 > 0:06:47- Usually, - the parents still like each other...
0:06:47 > 0:06:50- ..but they don't love each other.
0:06:51 > 0:06:56- If parents still get on with each - other, it helps the family a lot.
0:06:57 > 0:07:01- Hello! Bye, darling.
0:07:01 > 0:07:05- By now, Bea and her sister Imogen - travel regularly...
0:07:05 > 0:07:07- ..between Mam and Dad's homes.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11- Hello, Dad.
0:07:13 > 0:07:15- This is Imogen's room.
0:07:17 > 0:07:20- This is Imogen and here's Maggie.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22- She's very crazy.
0:07:22 > 0:07:24- This is my bedroom.
0:07:25 > 0:07:29- I like my room in Dad's house...
0:07:29 > 0:07:34- ..because it has a little television - and Maggie likes to come in...
0:07:34 > 0:07:36- ..and lie on the bed.
0:07:36 > 0:07:42- I stay here on Tuesday nights - and over the weekend.
0:07:43 > 0:07:45- We swap over on weekends.
0:07:45 > 0:07:47- What's happened to the music?
0:07:47 > 0:07:49- What's happened to the music?- - I don't know.
0:07:50 > 0:07:55- It can be confusing - living in two homes sometimes...
0:07:55 > 0:08:00- ..because you don't know which house - you're sleeping at that night.
0:08:00 > 0:08:05- But if you forget something, Mam or - Dad brings it around and it's fine.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07- What are we going to do then?
0:08:12 > 0:08:15- It's important to have - a good relationship with your ex...
0:08:15 > 0:08:18- ..because - it's the civilised thing to do.
0:08:18 > 0:08:21- # Ave Maria by Franz Schubert #
0:08:21 > 0:08:24- You have to find a way - of making that work.
0:08:24 > 0:08:28- Children need to know - they have their parents' support.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31- If that's always - your starting point...
0:08:31 > 0:08:34- ..I don't think - you'll ever go very far wrong.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39- PLAYS WRONG NOTE
0:08:39 > 0:08:41- We both went a bit wrong there!
0:08:44 > 0:08:48- There's no bad feeling between - Mam and Dad or anything like that.
0:08:52 > 0:08:53- Hello!
0:08:54 > 0:08:57- The entire family - does things together.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06- There's Alex, my brother.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08- There's Imogen, my sister.
0:09:08 > 0:09:11- There's Sarah, my stepmother.
0:09:11 > 0:09:13- There's John, my stepfather.
0:09:15 > 0:09:17- There's my father.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20- There's Greg, my stepgrandfather.
0:09:20 > 0:09:23- There's my grandmother - and there's my mother.
0:09:26 > 0:09:28- # Happy birthday to you
0:09:29 > 0:09:32- # Happy birthday to you
0:09:32 > 0:09:36- # Happy birthday, Alex and Greg
0:09:36 > 0:09:39- # Happy birthday to you #
0:09:40 > 0:09:42- Hooray!
0:09:45 > 0:09:49- But not all stepfamilies - are formed after a divorce.
0:09:50 > 0:09:54- Angela - is my birth mother's sister...
0:09:54 > 0:09:59- ..and then Mom and Dad - are my mother's parents.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02- This is getting confusing.
0:10:02 > 0:10:07- Caitlin is one of Bea's - best friends. She has two mothers.
0:10:08 > 0:10:10- Sometimes when people mention Mam...
0:10:11 > 0:10:14- ..I always say to them, 'Which Mam?'
0:10:14 > 0:10:18- Sometimes I don't know - which one they're talking about.
0:10:19 > 0:10:21- You two!
0:10:23 > 0:10:26- Mam is my stepmother...
0:10:26 > 0:10:30- ..because when I was a year old...
0:10:30 > 0:10:33- ..my mother died.
0:10:38 > 0:10:40- Caitlin's birth mother...
0:10:40 > 0:10:45- ..and Elin, Caitlin's stepmother, - were best friends.
0:10:45 > 0:10:48- Caitlin's mother Nicola and I - were friends...
0:10:48 > 0:10:50- ..before Caitlin was born.
0:10:51 > 0:10:55- We met when we worked together - as students at Cardiff University.
0:10:56 > 0:11:00- We instantly struck up a friendship.
0:11:00 > 0:11:05- This is a box full of things...
0:11:06 > 0:11:08- ..my mother liked...
0:11:09 > 0:11:11- ..and photographs of her.
0:11:14 > 0:11:20- That's my mother after - just finding out she was pregnant.
0:11:20 > 0:11:22- Is that you?
0:11:23 > 0:11:25- Yes.
0:11:25 > 0:11:29- I remember Nicola coming to my - office to tell me she was pregnant.
0:11:30 > 0:11:33- She was 36 when she fell pregnant.
0:11:33 > 0:11:38- She'd been trying for a while, - so she was really excited about it.
0:11:38 > 0:11:41- There's me in my mother's tummy.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45- My mother's growing belly.
0:11:45 > 0:11:48- I remember Caitlin being born...
0:11:48 > 0:11:53- ..and going to see her - - she had a mop of black hair.
0:11:53 > 0:11:57- There's me, when I came out.
0:12:01 > 0:12:03- But for Nicola and the family...
0:12:04 > 0:12:06- ..the celebrations were short lived.
0:12:07 > 0:12:10- I remember Nicola returning to work - after maternity leave...
0:12:11 > 0:12:13- ..and of her saying - she had severe headaches.
0:12:14 > 0:12:17- I joked about it, saying, - "You're missing Caitlin."
0:12:17 > 0:12:21- "No, it's the stress - of going back to work."
0:12:21 > 0:12:24- But, of course, - it was more than that.
0:12:24 > 0:12:28- I urged her - to go back to her doctor.
0:12:28 > 0:12:32- Specialists discovered - that Nicola had a brain tumour.
0:12:35 > 0:12:38- She died when Caitlin - was a year and a half old.
0:12:43 > 0:12:45- My mother was really good at sewing.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48- She started to make this.
0:12:52 > 0:12:56- She started this - but never finished it.
0:13:07 > 0:13:07- .
0:13:09 > 0:13:09- Subtitles
0:13:09 > 0:13:11- Subtitles- - Subtitles
0:13:13 > 0:13:18- Caitlin and her stepmother Elin - have a special relationship.
0:13:20 > 0:13:23- My mother died...
0:13:23 > 0:13:27- ..and Mam - started going out with my father...
0:13:27 > 0:13:29- ..and they got married.
0:13:30 > 0:13:33- When I started looking after her, - I wasn't prepared...
0:13:33 > 0:13:37- ..for motherhood, - but things happened.
0:13:37 > 0:13:41- I can't imagine life - without Caitlin now.
0:13:46 > 0:13:49- Today is a big day - for Elin and Caitlin.
0:13:49 > 0:13:54- I'm getting ready - for a gymnastics competition.
0:13:55 > 0:13:59- I started gymnastics - when I was about three years old.
0:14:01 > 0:14:03- I've been doing it ever since then.
0:14:05 > 0:14:08- I've won lots of medals.
0:14:12 > 0:14:15- The big decision for Caitlin - and her friends today...
0:14:15 > 0:14:17- ..is how to style their hair.
0:14:18 > 0:14:20- We all decided...
0:14:21 > 0:14:23- ..what to wear in our hair...
0:14:23 > 0:14:27- ..and then we told - one of the mothers...
0:14:27 > 0:14:30- ..so she could style it for us.
0:14:30 > 0:14:33- Caitlin says - I don't do it neat enough.
0:14:33 > 0:14:35- You can't do it.
0:14:36 > 0:14:37- Eurgh!
0:14:37 > 0:14:38- Eurgh!- - Sorry.
0:14:39 > 0:14:43- But Caitlin admits - her stepmother has other qualities.
0:14:43 > 0:14:49- She can be bossy - but she's really nice.
0:14:49 > 0:14:52- Right. Happy?
0:14:55 > 0:14:58- If Dad hadn't married Mam...
0:15:00 > 0:15:04- ..I don't think - I'd be going to gymnastics...
0:15:05 > 0:15:09- ..or dancing clubs - and things like that.
0:15:12 > 0:15:18- In Conwy, Erin is busy preparing - for her GCSE exams.
0:15:20 > 0:15:25- This is the result - I'm stressing out about the most...
0:15:25 > 0:15:29- ..because I really - don't want to resit maths.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32- That would be my worst nightmare.
0:15:33 > 0:15:36- But it's difficult to revise...
0:15:36 > 0:15:39- ..as well as look after - her new baby sister.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42- Oh, what's the matter?
0:15:42 > 0:15:44- BABY CRIES
0:15:45 > 0:15:49- It's kind of stressful. You - have to follow the right routine.
0:15:49 > 0:15:52- The baby has to do this, - the baby needs a bath.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55- Everything has to be sorted.
0:15:56 > 0:16:00- You have to be quiet - after a certain time.
0:16:00 > 0:16:03- What's the matter?
0:16:05 > 0:16:09- It's difficult trying - to do everything at the same time.
0:16:09 > 0:16:12- It really is.
0:16:19 > 0:16:23- In Cardiff, - this is Caitlin's chance to shine.
0:16:23 > 0:16:27- I'm nervous - but I'm really excited too.
0:16:36 > 0:16:40- Elin and Dad are always supportive, - but at times like these...
0:16:40 > 0:16:46- ..Caitlin's thoughts turn to - the past and her birth mother.
0:16:46 > 0:16:51- Sometimes when I compete - in competitions and so on...
0:16:51 > 0:16:55- ..I think about - what she would've been like...
0:16:55 > 0:16:57- ..if she were here now.
0:17:02 > 0:17:06- Would she be proud of me? - Would she cry? Would she be happy?
0:17:06 > 0:17:08- I don't know.
0:17:15 > 0:17:20- I was really nervous - because I'd done something new.
0:17:20 > 0:17:23- I was afraid I'd fall...
0:17:23 > 0:17:28- ..but it was good in the end.
0:17:31 > 0:17:33- But what about the result?
0:17:34 > 0:17:36- In third position...
0:17:36 > 0:17:38- ..Caitlin Boyle.
0:17:40 > 0:17:42- Two medals for Caitlin.
0:17:47 > 0:17:49- And a cwtsh from Mam.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00- Today is GCSE results day for Erin.
0:18:03 > 0:18:06- I don't want to go and get them.
0:18:07 > 0:18:10- I really don't. I'm quite nervous.
0:18:11 > 0:18:15- It's stressful being up so late...
0:18:15 > 0:18:19- ..revising stuff - I still don't understand.
0:18:20 > 0:18:22- It felt like - I was having a breakdown.
0:18:23 > 0:18:26- I just wanted to cry - about everything.
0:18:29 > 0:18:30- Hi, Erin.
0:18:30 > 0:18:31- Hi, Erin.- - Hiya.
0:18:32 > 0:18:36- Good results - would make me feel so happy.
0:18:37 > 0:18:41- It would make my family - really proud of me.
0:18:41 > 0:18:43- That would be nice.
0:18:43 > 0:18:45- Are you ready?
0:18:45 > 0:18:47- I think so.
0:18:48 > 0:18:53- Are you sure? The grades in bold - are the grades you've been awarded.
0:18:55 > 0:18:59- Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh!
0:19:01 > 0:19:03- I wasn't expecting that at all.
0:19:03 > 0:19:05- They're great. Congratulations.
0:19:05 > 0:19:07- They're great. Congratulations.- - Thank you.
0:19:08 > 0:19:11- I got two As...
0:19:12 > 0:19:14- ..four Bs...
0:19:14 > 0:19:17- ..and two Cs.
0:19:19 > 0:19:23- Let me see how you did. Oh, my God!
0:19:23 > 0:19:25- That's really good.
0:19:32 > 0:19:34- I'm really proud of you.
0:19:38 > 0:19:41- They're good, aren't they? - As and Bs.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44- And I did it, - even with you crying the house down!
0:19:51 > 0:19:53- It's early morning in Cardiff.
0:19:54 > 0:19:56- Are you going to have breakfast?
0:19:56 > 0:19:58- Are you going to have breakfast?- - It's Caitlin first day...
0:19:58 > 0:20:00- ..at secondary school.
0:20:00 > 0:20:05- I'm walking over - to my best friend's house...
0:20:05 > 0:20:10- ..and we're both - walking to school together.
0:20:11 > 0:20:15- I just want to see her - dressed in her school uniform.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18- It's a special day - for another reason too.
0:20:18 > 0:20:20- It's my birthday.
0:20:23 > 0:20:26- I'm really happy.
0:20:26 > 0:20:28- I'm growing up!
0:20:29 > 0:20:30- One, two, three.
0:20:32 > 0:20:37- As a sign of maturity, Caitlin's - been given a special present.
0:20:38 > 0:20:41- Mam's given me the door key.
0:20:41 > 0:20:45- The house key on a keyring.
0:20:49 > 0:20:54- For her stepmother Elin, - it's a day of mixed emotions.
0:20:55 > 0:21:00- I feel sad because it's an - important milestone for Caitlin....
0:21:00 > 0:21:02- ..and her mother's - not here to see it.
0:21:03 > 0:21:06- I didn't think - it'd affect me as much as it has.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12- Enjoy yourself. - Listen to the teachers.
0:21:12 > 0:21:14- Speak Welsh.
0:21:14 > 0:21:16- Ta-ra, Twts.
0:21:16 > 0:21:18- Ta-ra, Twts.- - Ta-ra.
0:21:18 > 0:21:21- Good luck!
0:21:21 > 0:21:25- It's been - a privilege raising Caitlin...
0:21:25 > 0:21:28- ..after knowing her mother so well.
0:21:29 > 0:21:31- Every decision - I make for Caitlin...
0:21:31 > 0:21:34- ..I think, - 'Would Nic be happy with this?'
0:21:36 > 0:21:40- I can't believe - we're actually walking to school.
0:21:40 > 0:21:43- To join in Caitlin's - birthday celebrations...
0:21:43 > 0:21:48- ..two other friends - are travelling to Cardiff.
0:21:49 > 0:21:52- Val and Lil.
0:21:52 > 0:21:54- The two grandmothers.
0:21:54 > 0:21:57- It's Caitlin's day.
0:21:57 > 0:22:00- I'll be pleased to see her.
0:22:01 > 0:22:03- I can't believe she's 12 already.
0:22:03 > 0:22:06- I don't know - where these last years have gone.
0:22:10 > 0:22:12- Lil is Elin's mother.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15- Val is Nicola's mother.
0:22:15 > 0:22:18- I enjoy coming.
0:22:18 > 0:22:20- I miss Nicola, mind you.
0:22:21 > 0:22:23- But Elin's been so good.
0:22:24 > 0:22:28- If Caitlin has something on, - Elin phones me straightaway.
0:22:28 > 0:22:30- "Are you coming up, Val?"
0:22:30 > 0:22:33- She's been great.
0:22:34 > 0:22:37- Hello. How are you?
0:22:37 > 0:22:42- I miss Nicola - but her spirit lives on in Caitlin.
0:22:42 > 0:22:45- She's given me a granddaughter.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49- How are you, sweetheart?
0:22:49 > 0:22:52- That's all you can say.
0:22:52 > 0:22:56- To Caitlin, happy birthday. - Happy birthday.
0:23:18 > 0:23:20- S4C Subtitles by Adnod Cyf.
0:23:20 > 0:23:20- .