0:00:02 > 0:00:04In a world where attraction's mostly based on looks,
0:00:04 > 0:00:07what would happen if you had to rely solely on your personality?
0:00:07 > 0:00:10Well, thanks to some magnificently monstrous masks...
0:00:10 > 0:00:12You look disgusting!
0:00:12 > 0:00:13..we're going to find out!
0:00:16 > 0:00:22Will true love blossom when what you see is definitely not what you get?
0:00:22 > 0:00:24This is Sexy Beasts!
0:00:29 > 0:00:32I'd describe my love life as pretty bleak.
0:00:32 > 0:00:36One and a half boyfriends.com. I'm very date deprived, yeah.
0:00:42 > 0:00:45Meet fashion stylist Latoya from London.
0:00:45 > 0:00:49So, Latoya, this is the bit where you sell yourself to the nation.
0:00:49 > 0:00:50What do we need to know?
0:00:50 > 0:00:55I'd describe my own personality as a mad woman on the loose.com.
0:00:55 > 0:00:57But in a very, very good way.
0:00:57 > 0:00:58Is there a good way?
0:01:02 > 0:01:06So what does our escaped lunatic look for in a man?
0:01:06 > 0:01:08Erm...the kind of guy that I would look for
0:01:08 > 0:01:11would have to have an element of a madman in him, of course.
0:01:11 > 0:01:12Of course!
0:01:12 > 0:01:15At the moment I'm going through a Camden phase,
0:01:15 > 0:01:18but I would not say no to Canary Wharf either.
0:01:18 > 0:01:19Clean, clean, clean.
0:01:20 > 0:01:23I have no idea what that means.com.
0:01:23 > 0:01:26So what will best friend Kenesha think
0:01:26 > 0:01:28when she sees Larobot for the first time?
0:01:28 > 0:01:31Oh, my God!
0:01:31 > 0:01:35You look a little bit scary, but I like it, yeah.
0:01:35 > 0:01:39She's a lovely girl, so whoever gets her, they...they'll be, like,
0:01:39 > 0:01:42- the luckiest man ever.- Aww! - Yeah, the luckiest guy ever.
0:01:42 > 0:01:46Well, we have three beasts all hoping to be that luckiest guy ever.
0:01:46 > 0:01:49Shall we meet them? Yes, let's.
0:01:49 > 0:01:52I've been single for about three years
0:01:52 > 0:01:54but now I'm making more of a conscious decision maybe
0:01:54 > 0:01:57to try and find somebody. Getting a bit older.
0:01:57 > 0:02:01# What's that coming over the hill? Is it a monster?
0:02:01 > 0:02:05# Is it a monster? #
0:02:05 > 0:02:09This ogre is Judd from Bath, via South Africa.
0:02:09 > 0:02:13He's a professional tennis player with a Grand Slam of a nickname.
0:02:13 > 0:02:15My nickname is Juddasmic.
0:02:15 > 0:02:17That's right, "Juddasmic".
0:02:17 > 0:02:20It's "orgasmic" and "Judd" combined.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22Yeah, I don't like telling people that.
0:02:22 > 0:02:23Really? Oh, well,
0:02:23 > 0:02:25the Juddasmic cat's out of the bag now.
0:02:30 > 0:02:31I ended up being a tennis player,
0:02:31 > 0:02:34because my mother had a crush on a few tennis players
0:02:34 > 0:02:37and she kind of said that, you know, "The cool guys play tennis."
0:02:37 > 0:02:40I picked it up from a young age and just fell in love.
0:02:40 > 0:02:45So he's in love with tennis, because his mum fancied Bjorn Borg.
0:02:45 > 0:02:48I wonder what Judd's friend, dreamy Joe, thinks of his new look.
0:02:50 > 0:02:52- All right?- Touch it, touch it.
0:02:52 > 0:02:54CAR HORN BEEPS
0:02:54 > 0:02:57So, Joe, you're one of Judd's closest friends.
0:02:57 > 0:02:59Tell us about this "Juddasmic" thing.
0:02:59 > 0:03:03Ju... what? Juddasmic? Did you describe yourself as that?
0:03:03 > 0:03:06No, no, that's...that's my nickname.
0:03:06 > 0:03:08- HE WHISTLES Yeah, well...- Since when?
0:03:08 > 0:03:11Well, that's Juddarrassing.
0:03:11 > 0:03:15- "Orgasmic" and "Judd".- Oh.- I didn't choose it, dude, it happened.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18- I hope you didn't.- Yeah. Juddasmic!
0:03:18 > 0:03:21Will Juddasmic ace it tonight? Time will tell.
0:03:21 > 0:03:25But let's meet our next beast who's already got wood.
0:03:25 > 0:03:27I'm incredibly good looking, yeah.
0:03:27 > 0:03:29Yeah, my looks are fairly important to me.
0:03:29 > 0:03:30I don't go wild about them,
0:03:30 > 0:03:32but, yeah, I like to look good when I can.
0:03:32 > 0:03:35# Baby, baby, you know it's true
0:03:35 > 0:03:38# I'm a puppet just for you... #
0:03:38 > 0:03:39Meet Martin,
0:03:39 > 0:03:42an incredibly good-looking electrician from Yorkshire
0:03:42 > 0:03:48who's going all out to find the perfect girl or just any girl.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50# Baby, pull my string... #
0:03:50 > 0:03:54I've just recently joined Tinder about two weeks ago.
0:03:54 > 0:03:57On the way up here, I might've swiped right
0:03:57 > 0:04:00to about 400 to 500 girls just out of boredom.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02I like to keep my finger in a few different pies.
0:04:02 > 0:04:06So he's attempted to finger 400 to 500 pies on one train journey.
0:04:06 > 0:04:08And how many pies replied?
0:04:09 > 0:04:11I got one accept. I got one match.
0:04:11 > 0:04:13Ha! Rubbish.
0:04:13 > 0:04:17# Pull the string and I'll wink at you... #
0:04:17 > 0:04:19Here's friend Ryan to tell us about
0:04:19 > 0:04:22Martin's remarkable pulling technique.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Mate, it's actually an improvement. He's not short of confidence.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30Yeah. I've got a little bit of a bad habit of proposing when I'm out.
0:04:30 > 0:04:31What?!
0:04:31 > 0:04:33The last time we were out in Durham,
0:04:33 > 0:04:36I don't know if the mood were holding me, and I just thought, "marriage."
0:04:36 > 0:04:38I got down on one knee and the only thing I had was a condom,
0:04:38 > 0:04:42so I proposed with a condom and we didn't consummate, but it was...
0:04:42 > 0:04:44it was still well received.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47He acts like it wasn't premeditated but it was in a ring box,
0:04:47 > 0:04:51so it's not just something that had happened by accident.
0:04:51 > 0:04:55So will Latoya be going home with a condom on her finger tonight?
0:04:55 > 0:04:59We'll have to wait and see! But, now, let's meet our final beast.
0:04:59 > 0:05:01Yeah, I like to think of myself as a bit of a pretty boy.
0:05:01 > 0:05:05I get looks in the street and stuff like that, which,
0:05:05 > 0:05:08you know, is possibly my appearance.
0:05:08 > 0:05:11But, yeah, I do like to think I'm quite popular with the girls.
0:05:16 > 0:05:20This is Simon from Lincoln, a mutant toad man electrician.
0:05:20 > 0:05:23Yes, two electricians are dating a robot.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26Handy! This one has superhero ambitions.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29I did suggest that I'd love to do something like the Hulk, yeah,
0:05:29 > 0:05:32so I'm not far off, I don't think.
0:05:32 > 0:05:35No-one give him a mirror. Now, let's talk about relationships.
0:05:35 > 0:05:38I'm not actively looking for a relationship at the moment.
0:05:38 > 0:05:41You won't find it if you keep looking for it.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43I think love is something that'll find you.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46You do know you've applied to take part in a dating show?
0:05:46 > 0:05:49I think he's in denial.
0:05:49 > 0:05:52So what are Mr Toad's pulling techniques?
0:05:52 > 0:05:54How is he going to win over our girl, Latoya?
0:05:54 > 0:05:58I'm going to make sure I win her over with my personality and charm.
0:05:59 > 0:06:02Good idea. Let's ask friend Liam if you've got any of either.
0:06:04 > 0:06:07- How you doing, man? - I'm doing good.
0:06:07 > 0:06:10Toad boy. I think he'll do all right on a date.
0:06:10 > 0:06:11He knows how to talk to people -
0:06:11 > 0:06:15he's friendly, he's funny, so these other lads haven't got a chance.
0:06:15 > 0:06:16Don't worry about that.
0:06:16 > 0:06:20So we have a toad, an ogre, and a wooden boy.
0:06:20 > 0:06:24Each freaky fella has a ten-minute speed date to impress Latoya,
0:06:24 > 0:06:28before she guns one of them down with her hypersonic love beam!
0:06:28 > 0:06:31The masks stay on until the dates are done,
0:06:31 > 0:06:34so it's personalities a go go!
0:06:39 > 0:06:42First to woo She-3PO is Martin.
0:06:42 > 0:06:43I'm Martin. Nice to meet you.
0:06:43 > 0:06:45Oh, and he's clutching a brown paper bag.
0:06:45 > 0:06:48Oh, it's a bribe or something from the top shelf?
0:06:48 > 0:06:50- I've got you a gift.- OK. - A little icebreaker.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54Interesting.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57Yes, Martin has gifted a photo of himself in the nude.
0:06:57 > 0:07:00I thought I'd just show you my cheeky side a little bit.
0:07:00 > 0:07:01- The...- OK.
0:07:01 > 0:07:03Latoya now knows what Martin's bum looks like
0:07:03 > 0:07:05before she's seen his face.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08If you were a rapper, what would your rap name be and why?
0:07:08 > 0:07:09Oh...
0:07:09 > 0:07:11Tiny Timber? Snoop Loggy Log?
0:07:11 > 0:07:142x4Pac Shakur. RIP.
0:07:14 > 0:07:16You know, I can't go for Vanilla Ice,
0:07:16 > 0:07:18- but I'll go for Vanilla Cheeks. - Oh, OK.
0:07:18 > 0:07:20Yeah, you've got a bit of wit, fair enough.
0:07:20 > 0:07:23Ask me your fire-away question.
0:07:23 > 0:07:25I need fire, heat!
0:07:25 > 0:07:26- If you were a stripper...- Yes.
0:07:26 > 0:07:30..what would your stripper name be and your go-to move?
0:07:30 > 0:07:33- You wanted heat! Let's turn it up! - Whoo!
0:07:33 > 0:07:36- Noisy T?- Noisy T.
0:07:36 > 0:07:39My stripper move, it would just have to be the robot, I'm sorry.
0:07:39 > 0:07:42- That would get me going.- Would it? - That would. That would get me hot.
0:07:42 > 0:07:45I spy a little bit of flirting. This is going well!
0:07:45 > 0:07:48Are you supposed to be like an alien, like a race alien?
0:07:51 > 0:07:53Erm, what's she doing?
0:07:55 > 0:07:58- Boring.- This is...
0:07:58 > 0:08:02Boring. Boring. Boring. Boring.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05I really have no idea what's going on right now.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08- Goodbye.- That's...- Goodbye.
0:08:08 > 0:08:10I'm finding this quite painful.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12We are, too, Martin.
0:08:12 > 0:08:16This is officially the cringiest date in Sexy Beasts' history.
0:08:16 > 0:08:19Erm, yeah, first free date with Latoya.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21Hopefully the last.
0:08:21 > 0:08:25'Yeah, I think she was odd, we'll say. She was just odd.'
0:08:25 > 0:08:26Hard to argue with that.
0:08:26 > 0:08:29Latoya, what the hell was that all about?
0:08:29 > 0:08:33I don't even know what I'm doing, if I'm being quite honest with you.
0:08:33 > 0:08:35There's no way that I'm going to make things easy for the guy.
0:08:35 > 0:08:37It's not a joke to be my partner,
0:08:37 > 0:08:40so they need to know that from the get-go.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42Well, that was awful.
0:08:42 > 0:08:43Judd's in next.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45Word of advice, Judd -
0:08:45 > 0:08:48Juddazzle like you've never Juddazzled before.
0:08:48 > 0:08:51Let's get to the nitty-gritty, shall we?
0:08:51 > 0:08:52Sure, yeah.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55Disney movie, favourite one, straight up.
0:08:55 > 0:08:57Ooh, that's a tough one. On the spot?
0:08:57 > 0:08:59Probably Beauty And The Beast?
0:08:59 > 0:09:01Interesting stuff, given the occasion.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04THEY CHUCKLE
0:09:04 > 0:09:07- It is. - Nice one, I like you. Witty. Ha-ha.
0:09:07 > 0:09:08Yeah.
0:09:08 > 0:09:1230 seconds in and Judd's already been interesting and witty.
0:09:12 > 0:09:13Juddasmic dating!
0:09:13 > 0:09:17Ask me your one magic, golden question, if you will.
0:09:18 > 0:09:20Do you cook well?
0:09:20 > 0:09:22Ugh! Mayday, Mayday!
0:09:22 > 0:09:25- Yes, I do, darling. I cook... - You cook well? What do you cook?
0:09:25 > 0:09:26..incredibly well.
0:09:26 > 0:09:28Ooh, well, this is going very well!
0:09:28 > 0:09:30The shoes, say something about them.
0:09:30 > 0:09:33- Well, they're very...they're very airy.- Cool. Stop.
0:09:33 > 0:09:34Uh-oh...
0:09:34 > 0:09:37Undo your second button.
0:09:37 > 0:09:42I...I'm not going to do that. I feel more comfortable like this, yeah.
0:09:42 > 0:09:43Oh, no!
0:09:43 > 0:09:45Oh.
0:09:49 > 0:09:53Boring. Boring. Boring. Boring.
0:09:53 > 0:09:55Are you calling me boring? That's not nice.
0:09:55 > 0:09:56No, sorry, I've changed my mind -
0:09:56 > 0:09:59THIS is the cringiest date in Sexy Beasts' history.
0:09:59 > 0:10:03That...that is by far the worst date I've ever had.
0:10:03 > 0:10:05I can say that hands down, yeah.
0:10:05 > 0:10:08And, oh, I'd be super happy if she binned me.
0:10:08 > 0:10:11Absolutely no problem. I don't think I want to win that.
0:10:11 > 0:10:14I... that, that's not what I'm here for.
0:10:14 > 0:10:17Overall, yeah, I would say thumbs up for the date with Judd.
0:10:17 > 0:10:21So things are looking good for Judd, which is bad for Judd.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24It's confusing. I almost feel guilty sending Simon in now.
0:10:24 > 0:10:26Good luck, Mr Toad!
0:10:26 > 0:10:29- What's your name? - My name's Latoya.- My name's Simon.
0:10:29 > 0:10:31What would you like to ask me?
0:10:31 > 0:10:34For frog's sake, be interesting.
0:10:34 > 0:10:37Um, well, I'd like to know where you're from, first of all.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39Oh, no. Boring?
0:10:39 > 0:10:41- I'm from London. - From London?- Yeah.
0:10:41 > 0:10:42Ooh!
0:10:42 > 0:10:44And, er, how, how old are you?
0:10:44 > 0:10:46Never ask a lady that, you idiot!
0:10:46 > 0:10:47I'm 23.
0:10:47 > 0:10:48Or not.
0:10:48 > 0:10:52What kind of hobbies are you into? What do you do in your spare time?
0:10:52 > 0:10:54Definitely boring!
0:10:54 > 0:10:56Er, I'm very heavily into fashion.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59- Do you...? - Designing and styling.- Very good.
0:10:59 > 0:11:00OK, now I'm really confused.
0:11:00 > 0:11:03She's completely enthralled by his insipid questioning!
0:11:03 > 0:11:06I brought a present for you, if you'd like to open it.
0:11:06 > 0:11:07Thank you very much.
0:11:07 > 0:11:10Simon has gifted some face paint. Some face paint.
0:11:10 > 0:11:14Once we've taken these masks off, if either of us decide
0:11:14 > 0:11:16we think we look better with the masks back on,
0:11:16 > 0:11:18take it back on for us.
0:11:18 > 0:11:20Thank you very much. Can I hug you for that?
0:11:20 > 0:11:22I really liked that one, thank you.
0:11:22 > 0:11:23Wow!
0:11:23 > 0:11:27I felt more comfortable with Simon. He was, like, smooth.
0:11:27 > 0:11:30Like, he had some kind of style to him.
0:11:30 > 0:11:33So, yeah, man, big ups to Simon.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36This is going a lot better than I expected, I won't lie.
0:11:36 > 0:11:38- So I've got a lovely cat. - A cat?
0:11:38 > 0:11:40He's my best friend, my cat.
0:11:40 > 0:11:43Long fur, called Matrix. Big grey and black cat.
0:11:43 > 0:11:46- I'm in love with Matrix. - Everyone loves Matrix.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49So nudity and pro tennis players are boring
0:11:49 > 0:11:50but talking about your cat isn't.
0:11:50 > 0:11:53I mean, women are hard work, aren't they?
0:11:53 > 0:11:54- Cheers.- Cheers.
0:11:54 > 0:11:56She seemed a nice girl.
0:11:56 > 0:11:58A bit too early to say whether I could like her but, yeah,
0:11:58 > 0:12:01we seem to get on OK and we had a nice bit of conversation.
0:12:04 > 0:12:05OK.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08Well, I think we've all found out why Latoya is single,
0:12:08 > 0:12:09apart from Simon.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12Dare we give her the power to bin a beast?
0:12:12 > 0:12:16Well, we have to. It's a really important format point. Let's go!
0:12:19 > 0:12:24Our solo cyborg has dated/tormented a puzzled puppet,
0:12:24 > 0:12:27an angry ogre, and an utterly oblivious amphibian.
0:12:27 > 0:12:28Hi, guys.
0:12:28 > 0:12:32And one is about to be dumped/given the best news they've had all day.
0:12:34 > 0:12:37Will Judd be playing singles for ever?
0:12:37 > 0:12:41Will Martin have to rely on that one reply he got on Tinder?
0:12:41 > 0:12:45Or will Simon meet Latoya's robotic dark side?
0:12:45 > 0:12:48It's time for the robo-chop!
0:12:50 > 0:12:52It was very nice to meet all of you
0:12:52 > 0:12:56and apologies if I made any of you feel uncomfortable.
0:12:56 > 0:12:57If?!
0:12:57 > 0:13:01I just wanted to sort of suss. So, Judd...
0:13:01 > 0:13:04- Hi.- You were very witty.
0:13:04 > 0:13:08Maybe we didn't connect as much as I would've liked us to, so...
0:13:08 > 0:13:09thank you, Judd.
0:13:09 > 0:13:11- Hi, Simon!- Hiya.
0:13:11 > 0:13:14Hi. I am totally in love with Matrix.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17- Wait until you get to see him. - SHE LAUGHS
0:13:17 > 0:13:19What maybe I didn't like about our date is the fact that maybe
0:13:19 > 0:13:23you could've been a bit more creative with the questions you asked me?
0:13:23 > 0:13:26OK, yeah. I was just starting off with the basics, you know?
0:13:26 > 0:13:28OK. And hi, Martin!
0:13:28 > 0:13:29- Hi.- Hi.
0:13:29 > 0:13:32You were very jolly and happy-go-lucky from the get-go
0:13:32 > 0:13:34so that was really nice energy to have.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37What I didn't like was maybe you revealed everything straightaway,
0:13:37 > 0:13:38but thank you very much.
0:13:38 > 0:13:42Latoya, in conclusion of our date, I'm prepared to pay
0:13:42 > 0:13:46or give you any organ you'd like to not go on another date.
0:13:46 > 0:13:48Oh, wow! That is interesting.
0:13:48 > 0:13:52Shocking scenes, but also perfectly understandable.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55Thank you very much, guys.
0:13:55 > 0:13:59I have made my decision and the beast that I am binning is...
0:14:02 > 0:14:04We're still reeling here at Sexy Beasts HQ.
0:14:04 > 0:14:08Never in the history of beastly dating has anyone actually
0:14:08 > 0:14:09begged to be binned.
0:14:13 > 0:14:14..Judd.
0:14:14 > 0:14:15What?!
0:14:15 > 0:14:17That's great, thank you.
0:14:17 > 0:14:18Juddasmic is Juddumped!
0:14:20 > 0:14:21Well done.
0:14:21 > 0:14:24He seems fine. Martin, however...
0:14:24 > 0:14:27Well, let's take a look at that again!
0:14:27 > 0:14:28Judd.
0:14:30 > 0:14:34Even the mask cannot hide his utter devastation!
0:14:34 > 0:14:37He will be going on another date with Latoya.
0:14:37 > 0:14:42After Martin made the comment, a part of me did want to just bin him
0:14:42 > 0:14:45there and then, but there was a part of me that was really,
0:14:45 > 0:14:49really liked the feistiness and I was like, "Yes, boy, get in there."
0:14:49 > 0:14:54So how does Judd feel about losing in such humiliating circumstances?
0:14:54 > 0:14:55Oh, I'm super happy.
0:14:55 > 0:14:58Yeah, it couldn't have been a better outcome, to be honest.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01So Judd leaves us having found love.
0:15:01 > 0:15:05Unfortunately, in tennis terms, love means absolutely nothing.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09Let's rip his face off and see if the ogre is worth ogling.
0:15:09 > 0:15:16# I am the man who will fight for your honour... #
0:15:16 > 0:15:20Ooh! Game, set and handsome! Judd is a stud!
0:15:20 > 0:15:22Look at his movie star chin,
0:15:22 > 0:15:26and he's finally unbuttoned his shirt for Latoya as well.
0:15:26 > 0:15:28Has she made a monumental mistake?
0:15:30 > 0:15:33Time for everyone else to see the dish she dumped.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36SHE LAUGHS
0:15:36 > 0:15:38Hi.
0:15:38 > 0:15:39Hi.
0:15:39 > 0:15:43You're very good-looking. Your voice sounds that much more sexier now.
0:15:45 > 0:15:48He is definitely like Prince Charming
0:15:48 > 0:15:52and I don't think I'm his princess.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55Yeah, quite a handsome looking chap. The one that got away.
0:15:55 > 0:15:57The one that got away.
0:15:57 > 0:15:58By the skin of your teeth.
0:15:58 > 0:16:01Happy with my decision but I would like to keep his voice
0:16:01 > 0:16:04and put it in my pocket. Yeah.
0:16:06 > 0:16:09So with Judd's voice bound and gagged in her pocket,
0:16:09 > 0:16:13Latoya has two more dates to enjoy before choosing her sexy beast.
0:16:13 > 0:16:16First up is Martin the marionette.
0:16:24 > 0:16:28And it's just what Martin was hoping for - a date in a small, enclosed
0:16:28 > 0:16:31space with the woman he dislikes more than life without vital organs.
0:16:31 > 0:16:32Oh.
0:16:32 > 0:16:34- So we're back.- Yeah.
0:16:34 > 0:16:37How are you feeling about this, Martin?
0:16:37 > 0:16:39Yeah, to come through to the second day is quite a shock.
0:16:39 > 0:16:41I really didn't expect it.
0:16:41 > 0:16:45The Brighton Wheel - the go-to attraction for awkward dates.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48Look, there are even rules for Martin - no kicking,
0:16:48 > 0:16:50no punching, and no getting your little wooden fella out.
0:16:50 > 0:16:54Well, I probably should start by saying my comment at the pick
0:16:54 > 0:16:57was a little bit out of character, probably. I don't usually...
0:16:57 > 0:17:00- No problem.- But I just thought the first date was a bit weird.
0:17:00 > 0:17:02- But I'm glad we passed it and we... - Yeah. Definitely.
0:17:02 > 0:17:04..and it's all gone full circle.
0:17:04 > 0:17:06No pun intended.
0:17:06 > 0:17:08He's on it. What is it you do?
0:17:08 > 0:17:11- I'm a fashion stylist.- Yeah? - Freelance fashion stylist.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13- And what do you do? - Nice. I'm an electrician.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15- Really? That's so cool.- Yeah, yeah.
0:17:15 > 0:17:18I might have a few pipes for you to fix.
0:17:18 > 0:17:20Pipes?
0:17:20 > 0:17:23That sounds just wrong cos I'm an electrician, I don't look at pipes.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26Well, you're going to have to educate me on the job.
0:17:26 > 0:17:30Hang on, what's happening here? They're having a nice, normal date.
0:17:30 > 0:17:31This is weird!
0:17:31 > 0:17:35My usual party piece when I go out is I'll quite often propose.
0:17:35 > 0:17:37OK.
0:17:37 > 0:17:38- As like more of a joke.- Yep.
0:17:38 > 0:17:40We were out the other week
0:17:40 > 0:17:42and I might have proposed to a girl with a condom.
0:17:42 > 0:17:46OK. Well, yeah, I definitely haven't heard that one before.
0:17:46 > 0:17:49So you've never been proposed to with a condom, then?
0:17:49 > 0:17:52- No, I haven't.- That's... - Not yet.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Oh, no, Martin, you're not going to!
0:17:54 > 0:17:57HE LAUGHS
0:17:57 > 0:17:58No, he's not.
0:17:58 > 0:18:02I wish I'd planned that. I wish I had one on me so I could propose.
0:18:02 > 0:18:05Oh my... Why didn't you bring one?
0:18:05 > 0:18:07Yeah, I tend not to carry condoms everywhere,
0:18:07 > 0:18:10which is probably why I've got 13 children in 14 countries.
0:18:10 > 0:18:12Maths not your strong point?
0:18:12 > 0:18:14I would have said yes.
0:18:15 > 0:18:17She'd marry him?!
0:18:17 > 0:18:20So, having proved it's a very fine line between love and hate,
0:18:20 > 0:18:23our flirting freaks have found a quiet spot to eat out,
0:18:23 > 0:18:25sampling the fishy delights of ...
0:18:25 > 0:18:26fish.
0:18:29 > 0:18:32I was dreading going for this date and it's been so much better.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34- Really?- Yeah, I didn't expect it to be, like, that bad.- Yeah.
0:18:34 > 0:18:36But I thought it'd be uncomfortable a bit.
0:18:36 > 0:18:39I feel comfortable as well so I think it's been fun.
0:18:39 > 0:18:42This is all going very well, isn't it? Oh! Steady, lady!
0:18:43 > 0:18:45Do you still think I'm boring?
0:18:45 > 0:18:49- No.- No? That's cool. I'll cheers you with a chip.
0:18:51 > 0:18:52Cheers.
0:18:52 > 0:18:56So no crazy robot lady at all this time?
0:18:56 > 0:18:59So I didn't bring the crazy robot lady to the date today
0:18:59 > 0:19:01cos I didn't feel like I needed her for...
0:19:01 > 0:19:04Everything was running smoothly, conversation was running well.
0:19:04 > 0:19:08He's a really, really nice guy and I feel good about it.
0:19:08 > 0:19:12Ooh! Do we have the world's most unlikely romance on our hands?
0:19:12 > 0:19:14Martin?
0:19:14 > 0:19:16I have absolutely no interest in seeing her again
0:19:16 > 0:19:19unless she's in excruciating pain.
0:19:19 > 0:19:23I think that's a no. Never mind, Latoya-tron.
0:19:23 > 0:19:25You've got one more chance for love.
0:19:25 > 0:19:28He's green, he's warty, and he's waiting for you
0:19:28 > 0:19:32on a lily pad in the beautiful British countryside.
0:19:32 > 0:19:36Yes, Latoya-bot and Toady Simon have come to feed the ducks,
0:19:36 > 0:19:39and somehow Latoya seems to know all of their names.
0:19:39 > 0:19:43Come on, Ophelia! Come on, Anthony!
0:19:43 > 0:19:45There you go, Shaconda.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48So how's your dating experiences gone so far? Have you...?
0:19:48 > 0:19:50PEACOCK SCREECHES
0:19:50 > 0:19:51Jesus Christ.
0:19:51 > 0:19:54This guy's getting jealous. He's getting jealous.
0:19:54 > 0:19:56She is a bit of a diva.
0:19:56 > 0:19:59Hmm, she's not the only diva in this nature reserve.
0:19:59 > 0:20:01What kind of nickname would you come up with for me?
0:20:01 > 0:20:05I don't know. You're kind of giving me the whole Simonequa vibe.
0:20:05 > 0:20:06Simonequa?
0:20:06 > 0:20:08Simonequa, there we go.
0:20:08 > 0:20:10- High-five to that. - Simonequa.
0:20:10 > 0:20:13Yeah, I don't think I'll be sticking with the Simonequa nickname
0:20:13 > 0:20:15but she seems to be giving everything nicknames
0:20:15 > 0:20:17at the moment so I'll just go along with it.
0:20:17 > 0:20:19So what does Latoya-nequa think?
0:20:19 > 0:20:22I wouldn't mind if he sort of, you know,
0:20:22 > 0:20:25broke out into a little break-dance or something.
0:20:25 > 0:20:28Um, but, yeah, he's a nice guy. Very cool.
0:20:28 > 0:20:29Chillaxed.
0:20:29 > 0:20:32Things are looking promising. Shall we ramp up the romance?
0:20:32 > 0:20:36Who hasn't fallen in love whilst riding a miniature railway?
0:20:36 > 0:20:37All aboard the love train!
0:20:37 > 0:20:38Shall we sing a song?
0:20:38 > 0:20:39No.
0:20:39 > 0:20:42- What song are you going to sing? - I think an old school garage song.
0:20:42 > 0:20:44Definitely not.
0:20:44 > 0:20:47# My baby takes the morning train
0:20:47 > 0:20:49# He works from nine to five... #
0:20:49 > 0:20:51Aww, this is nice. I like trains.
0:20:51 > 0:20:54# To find me waiting for him. #
0:20:54 > 0:20:56JUDDERING
0:20:57 > 0:21:01My goodness me. I think we've de-railed.
0:21:01 > 0:21:03We've de-railed off the track.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07Holy moley! An actual live disaster, right here on Sexy Beasts!
0:21:07 > 0:21:10- Do you want a hand there, chap? I'll help ya.- Go on, strong man.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12Where do we need it lifted?
0:21:12 > 0:21:15- Lift the whole frame up. - The whole frame up?
0:21:15 > 0:21:18# And then a hero comes along... #
0:21:18 > 0:21:21Valiant scenes of superhuman strength as Simon lifts up
0:21:21 > 0:21:25the entire train with his bare hands.
0:21:25 > 0:21:26Yep, lovely.
0:21:26 > 0:21:28We're on.
0:21:28 > 0:21:30And what was his childhood dream again?
0:21:30 > 0:21:33I would love to be something like The Hulk, yeah.
0:21:33 > 0:21:35- ECHOING:- ..the Hulk, yeah... the Hulk, yeah...
0:21:35 > 0:21:37GROWLING
0:21:38 > 0:21:42Sometimes, friends, sometimes...
0:21:42 > 0:21:44dreams really do come true.
0:21:44 > 0:21:46Could it be true love?
0:21:46 > 0:21:47The whole experience has been brilliant.
0:21:47 > 0:21:50I'd give it a ten out of ten.
0:21:50 > 0:21:54Overall, for Simon...
0:21:54 > 0:21:56boring. Boring.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58Oh. Didn't see that one coming.
0:22:00 > 0:22:03So who will be Latoya's sexy beast?
0:22:03 > 0:22:05Will it be Martin?
0:22:05 > 0:22:08He got a second date despite offering to
0:22:08 > 0:22:10disembowel himself to avoid it.
0:22:10 > 0:22:14Together they ate fish and it almost ended in marriage.
0:22:14 > 0:22:18Or will it be Simon? He lifted up a train for her.
0:22:18 > 0:22:22She gave him a girl's name but she did find him boring.
0:22:22 > 0:22:26Once we have a winner the masks are coming off.
0:22:27 > 0:22:28It's over to you, R2She2!
0:22:33 > 0:22:36Hello, gents. Lovely to see you both again.
0:22:36 > 0:22:38I enjoyed both of my dates.
0:22:38 > 0:22:40So I'm going to start with Simonequa.
0:22:40 > 0:22:42She's talking about Simon.
0:22:42 > 0:22:45I feel like you're a very down to earth guy, you're very humble,
0:22:45 > 0:22:46very grounded, so that's nice to know.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49But felt you didn't come out of your shell as much as you could've.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51Yeah, that's a fair enough comment, yeah.
0:22:51 > 0:22:54It's a bit awkward in this situation, as you can imagine,
0:22:54 > 0:22:56- but, yeah.- Thank you very much.
0:22:56 > 0:22:59Martin, the things that I liked about the date with you
0:22:59 > 0:23:01is the fact that you had really good banter.
0:23:01 > 0:23:05What I didn't like is the comment to do with you proposing with a condom.
0:23:05 > 0:23:09Latoya, I thought our second date went a lot better than the first
0:23:09 > 0:23:13but still, please don't confuse my politeness with actually liking you.
0:23:13 > 0:23:17I'd still rather have a cyst the size of a football than ever see you again.
0:23:17 > 0:23:19Another very detailed insult from Martin
0:23:19 > 0:23:23but he's tried this tactic before and it back-fired.
0:23:23 > 0:23:26That's excellent to know. Thank you very much for that. Perfect.
0:23:26 > 0:23:29Simon still has no idea what's going on.
0:23:29 > 0:23:34So, after this lovely evaluation,
0:23:34 > 0:23:36I have come to my decision
0:23:36 > 0:23:38and my sexy beast is...
0:23:47 > 0:23:49..Simonequa.
0:23:49 > 0:23:54And they're both delighted with the decision! It's a Sexy Beasts first.
0:23:54 > 0:23:57I'm over the moon to be the sexy beast.
0:23:57 > 0:24:00I just wish that she'd stop calling me Simonequa.
0:24:00 > 0:24:02I imagine her being stunning, to be honest with you.
0:24:02 > 0:24:04I hope she is cos she's got nothing else.
0:24:04 > 0:24:05Meow!
0:24:05 > 0:24:09We'll see what our happy couple look like very soon, but first,
0:24:09 > 0:24:12pints of plastic made Martin look like he was made of wood,
0:24:12 > 0:24:16which is weird, but this is what he looks like underneath.
0:24:18 > 0:24:22# Keep on lovin' you...#
0:24:23 > 0:24:26Pinocchio is a real boy after all!
0:24:26 > 0:24:30Well, Martin is clearly distraught but will Latoya regret her decision?
0:24:30 > 0:24:32She's about to find out.
0:24:32 > 0:24:34And although Martin will see the real Latoya,
0:24:34 > 0:24:36we will wait a little longer.
0:24:39 > 0:24:42Wow. You're actually really pretty.
0:24:42 > 0:24:47Thank you very much. You're very pretty as well. You are.
0:24:47 > 0:24:49So would you approach me in a, a club with your condom, then?
0:24:49 > 0:24:51- Yeah. - HE LAUGHS
0:24:53 > 0:24:55Probably not.
0:24:55 > 0:24:57Beauty's obviously skin deep.
0:24:57 > 0:25:00I think you've got to look in a bit more to see a nice person
0:25:00 > 0:25:02and sometimes you just don't see it.
0:25:02 > 0:25:06Well done, Martin. That's exactly the point of the show.
0:25:06 > 0:25:09That's right, viewers. There is a point to all of this.
0:25:09 > 0:25:10Shall we carry on?
0:25:10 > 0:25:12This is Latoya's dream man -
0:25:12 > 0:25:16a warty green toad with a preposterously plump trout pout.
0:25:16 > 0:25:19But who is lurking behind the latex?
0:25:19 > 0:25:21# Hungry eyes... #
0:25:24 > 0:25:28Goodbye Mr Toad and hello the incredible hunk!
0:25:28 > 0:25:31# Hungry eyes
0:25:33 > 0:25:36# I feel the magic between you and I. #
0:25:38 > 0:25:40Um, hello?
0:25:41 > 0:25:45Sorry, is it just me or is this one going on for ages?
0:25:45 > 0:25:46I think we've seen enough now.
0:25:48 > 0:25:51And so to our scandalous she-bot, Latoya.
0:25:51 > 0:25:54The character that emerged from within the robot was probably
0:25:54 > 0:25:56scarier than the mask, to be honest.
0:25:56 > 0:26:00Buckle up, everyone. It's time to meet the madam behind the machine.
0:26:02 > 0:26:05# Crazy for you
0:26:05 > 0:26:10# Touch me once and you'll know it's true
0:26:10 > 0:26:14# I never wanted anyone like this. #
0:26:14 > 0:26:17Wow! She is Smokinghot.com!
0:26:17 > 0:26:18Oh, and look -
0:26:18 > 0:26:22she's imprinted a bit of robot in the middle of her forehead.
0:26:22 > 0:26:23Good luck, world.
0:26:28 > 0:26:31But what will our beasts think when the curtain comes down?
0:26:32 > 0:26:35Is toad in the hole on the menu tonight?
0:26:40 > 0:26:42# Love lifts us up where we belong. #
0:26:42 > 0:26:44Wow. You look completely different
0:26:44 > 0:26:47to what I thought you was going to look like.
0:26:47 > 0:26:49Really? You look flipping amazing!
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Give me a hug. How you doing?
0:26:51 > 0:26:53Nice to meet you.
0:26:55 > 0:26:59I do fancy Simonequa. Simonequa is hot.
0:26:59 > 0:27:01I'm really, I'm pretty happy with that.
0:27:01 > 0:27:05Guy. Guy. Massive guy.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08But you're a very, very handsome guy. Well done.
0:27:08 > 0:27:09Thank you.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11Yay!
0:27:13 > 0:27:17But to prove it's true love or at least true lust, our beasts
0:27:17 > 0:27:22must reunite here over a luxurious bottle of supermarket Cava.
0:27:22 > 0:27:23We're very generous.
0:27:23 > 0:27:26All they have to do is turn up, but will they?
0:27:28 > 0:27:32And Simonequa's here! But what about Latoya?
0:27:32 > 0:27:34She is the queen of unpredictable.
0:27:34 > 0:27:37Oh, dear, he's popped his own cork.
0:27:40 > 0:27:42Poor Simon, drinking alone...
0:27:42 > 0:27:44Ah! Where did she come from?
0:27:44 > 0:27:47Ah, you've came, have you? Great to see ya.
0:27:47 > 0:27:48Take a seat.
0:27:48 > 0:27:50Wow.
0:27:50 > 0:27:54Maybe they will be having beautiful robo-toad babies after all.
0:27:54 > 0:27:56Right, I've come on this date
0:27:56 > 0:27:59- as long as you don't call me Simonequa again.- OK.- All night.
0:27:59 > 0:28:03- Shall we cheers to that? - Cheers to that.
0:28:03 > 0:28:05Sexy mission accomplished.
0:28:08 > 0:28:11Latoya the robot arrived with a thud.
0:28:11 > 0:28:14And scared the shit out of Martin and Judd.
0:28:14 > 0:28:18But Simon the toad was spared of her scorn.
0:28:18 > 0:28:21He lifted a train, a hero was born.
0:28:21 > 0:28:24She did find him boring but likes muscles, you know?
0:28:24 > 0:28:28Thus missing completely the point of our show.
0:28:28 > 0:28:29Sleep tight, friends.