The Royal Special

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03# Where are my pop stars?

0:00:03 > 0:00:04# We are the hipsters... #

0:00:04 > 0:00:06Welcome to the dark side.

0:00:06 > 0:00:10# You know we're going to party like the rock star boys

0:00:10 > 0:00:12# We're as good as they come... #

0:00:12 > 0:00:14SHE SCREAMS

0:00:14 > 0:00:16Here on Snog Marry Avoid?,

0:00:16 > 0:00:19we're on a mission to restore natural beauty to our land.

0:00:19 > 0:00:22Our kingdom is a fake-free zone, ruled with a rod of iron.

0:00:22 > 0:00:27We will not stop until the slap has been slung and the fake tan finished.

0:00:27 > 0:00:31Even the highest in the land will have to bow to our will.

0:00:31 > 0:00:34Because in this programme, we've got a right royal line-up.

0:00:34 > 0:00:36All hail the kings and queens of slap.

0:00:36 > 0:00:38That's enough of that.

0:00:53 > 0:00:59Greetings, Your Royal POD-ness, and if I may say so, you are in for a right royal treat today.

0:00:59 > 0:01:02What are you going on about, Jenny Frost?

0:01:02 > 0:01:07Merely that in today's show, we have a line-up that will impress even you.

0:01:07 > 0:01:09You know it's very hard to impress the POD.

0:01:09 > 0:01:14But we've got some absolute crown jewels today and each one of them has a royal title.

0:01:14 > 0:01:17Everyone is equal under the gaze of MY purple lens.

0:01:17 > 0:01:22Well, that's very good, POD, because some of these blue bloods might present quite a challenge.

0:01:22 > 0:01:24Let me at them, Frost.

0:01:24 > 0:01:25Coming up on tonight's show,

0:01:25 > 0:01:29POD has a royal appointment with a king who loves his crown...

0:01:29 > 0:01:33The faker the better, the bigger the better and the blonder the better.

0:01:33 > 0:01:37..an impossible princess reveals the truth behind her regal lifestyle...

0:01:37 > 0:01:39I'm a luxury very few can afford.

0:01:39 > 0:01:42..and POD meets a real lady of leisure.

0:01:42 > 0:01:46I would rather be locked in a tower than give up my glamorous lifestyle.

0:01:46 > 0:01:50So, who's first in line to the throne of natural beauty?

0:01:50 > 0:01:53That would be Princess Regan and all I'll say is

0:01:53 > 0:01:57I would not like to get in front of this young lady in a queue.

0:01:57 > 0:01:59Get on your knees and call me

0:01:59 > 0:02:04your highness, I'm telling you now, I'm Manchester's finest.

0:02:07 > 0:02:11Hi! I'm Barbie Princess, Regan Pia Carra.

0:02:11 > 0:02:15I call myself a council estate princess.

0:02:15 > 0:02:17Quick, they're filming this!

0:02:17 > 0:02:22I realised that I was a princess from a very young age. Have you ever been on telly?

0:02:22 > 0:02:24You just can't get the staff these days.

0:02:24 > 0:02:27Being a princess is not an easy life.

0:02:27 > 0:02:32You've got to get the look right, you've got to get the way you act right.

0:02:32 > 0:02:33You're two-and-a-half hours late.

0:02:33 > 0:02:35Don't start stressing me out!

0:02:35 > 0:02:38You've got to get the princess strops down to a T.

0:02:38 > 0:02:39I'm not waiting two hours to get me nails done,

0:02:39 > 0:02:41cos I will kick off, royal!

0:02:43 > 0:02:48I'd' rather go without sex for three weeks than without my eyelashes.

0:02:48 > 0:02:51Even the Queen throws a few individuals on.

0:02:51 > 0:02:56Yeah, I do think I'm pretty amazing, but, that doesn't mean that a girl can't dream.

0:02:56 > 0:03:03One day I will have diamond rings and like an £80,000 necklace

0:03:03 > 0:03:04around my neck.

0:03:04 > 0:03:07- Just lovely, luxurious stuff. - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:03:13 > 0:03:16It's hard being a princess. I'm a luxury that very few can afford.

0:03:16 > 0:03:18She doesn't need fakery,

0:03:18 > 0:03:20she is definitely a natural beauty,

0:03:20 > 0:03:23but it's nice for her to believe in that too.

0:03:23 > 0:03:28I get a lot of attention from guys.

0:03:28 > 0:03:32Guys look at me as if to say, "Wow, she's absolutely gorgeous."

0:03:32 > 0:03:34# She can make a Saturday night

0:03:34 > 0:03:36# Oh oh oh Get to the club... #

0:03:36 > 0:03:39POD, whatever you think you've got for me, I'm ten paces ahead.

0:03:39 > 0:03:44By the time I've finished with you, POD, you'll be collecting your P45.

0:03:44 > 0:03:46Well, hello, beautiful Princess Regan.

0:03:46 > 0:03:52- Where did the princess come from? I'm presuming you weren't born with the princess title?- I don't know.

0:03:52 > 0:03:56People used to say, "You're such a princess," and it's stuck. I love it.

0:03:56 > 0:03:58I am a proper princess, I have princess strops.

0:03:58 > 0:04:02So when you have a strop, do you do a big pout,

0:04:02 > 0:04:07- because I'm thinking you don't need to push your lips out far.- No. - What have you done to your mouth?

0:04:07 > 0:04:12I had fillers before, and the other day I had fillers again, so it's still swollen.

0:04:12 > 0:04:15What is the worst outfit POD could put you in?

0:04:15 > 0:04:21I could wear a bin bag and make it look like Prada. It don't really matter, I'll give it all me swagger.

0:04:21 > 0:04:26I'm quite concerned about POD, actually, not you, but I know you're going to look stunning. Good luck.

0:04:28 > 0:04:31# Rule Britannia

0:04:31 > 0:04:33# Britannia rules... #

0:04:33 > 0:04:35CLUNK!

0:04:35 > 0:04:41I am POD, the Personal Overhaul Device. Who are you?

0:04:41 > 0:04:43Barbie Princess Regan Pia Carra.

0:04:43 > 0:04:47That's a very long title for someone that looks a total mess.

0:04:47 > 0:04:49I don't look a total mess, you cheeky rat.

0:04:49 > 0:04:53POD would like to know, what are you the princess of?

0:04:53 > 0:04:55Fake stuff, pink stuff, pretty stuff.

0:04:55 > 0:05:00If you were a real princess, what would be your first royal decree?

0:05:00 > 0:05:03Everyone should have free spray-tans on the NHS!

0:05:03 > 0:05:07POD predicts your kingdom would look very orange and very fake.

0:05:07 > 0:05:10Yeah, cos then no-one will look pale and nasty.

0:05:10 > 0:05:14On the subject of nasty, did somebody punch you in the mouth?

0:05:14 > 0:05:20I've had me lips done, and it's still swollen, but when it's gone down, it'll just look well sexy.

0:05:20 > 0:05:23Your pimped-up lips are registering in my memory bank.

0:05:23 > 0:05:26POD has definitely seen them somewhere before.

0:05:26 > 0:05:29MUSIC: "The Muppet Show Theme"

0:05:29 > 0:05:31Well, I love my trout pout.

0:05:31 > 0:05:35What does your look say about the type of princess that you are?

0:05:35 > 0:05:39- That I'm a goer.- Well, you're going to have to kiss a lot of these...

0:05:41 > 0:05:42..before your Prince Charming turns up.

0:05:42 > 0:05:50I don't like nice boys. I'm a "ride or die" kind of girl and I like bad boys. I love 'em.

0:05:50 > 0:05:54Your taste in men is as bad as your taste in clothes.

0:05:54 > 0:05:55I look nice, thank you very much!

0:05:55 > 0:06:01I love my look and I've worked hard to look the way I look. Turn it in!

0:06:01 > 0:06:04In that case, why have you come before POD for a makeunder?

0:06:04 > 0:06:08I want to see what I look like without it all. I want natural self-confidence.

0:06:08 > 0:06:13POD can help you with that, but first, I need to run Phase 1...

0:06:14 > 0:06:18What sort of reaction do you normally get from the public?

0:06:18 > 0:06:20That I'm hard work. I am hard work, though!

0:06:20 > 0:06:25For once, POD agrees, but let's find out what your royal subjects think.

0:06:25 > 0:06:26We asked them...

0:06:28 > 0:06:30What do you think they said?

0:06:30 > 0:06:33POD loves an optimist. Play.

0:06:33 > 0:06:35I would avoid.

0:06:35 > 0:06:37Definitely avoid her.

0:06:37 > 0:06:38She's covered in fake tan.

0:06:38 > 0:06:42- Great.- I would avoid her, because she's got a lot of make-up on

0:06:42 > 0:06:45and she looks like she's put some Dulux paint on her lips.

0:06:45 > 0:06:46I wouldn't want to touch them anyway.

0:06:46 > 0:06:50Of all of the people we asked, 30% said they'd snog you,

0:06:50 > 0:06:55but don't pucker up yet, as 70% of the public wanted to avoid you.

0:06:55 > 0:06:57But 30% said that they wanted to get near me,

0:06:57 > 0:06:59so that's all right with me!

0:06:59 > 0:07:05- Are you ready for my verdict?- Yes. - Princess Regan, you have reigned supreme

0:07:05 > 0:07:07with your body-flaunting, lip-plumping, diva lifestyle.

0:07:07 > 0:07:10You will undergo my...

0:07:14 > 0:07:18- You've got your work cut out. - You're not kidding. Ready for the next stage?

0:07:18 > 0:07:20- All right. - Run Phase 2...

0:07:22 > 0:07:24Please put on your deep cleanse uniform.

0:07:24 > 0:07:29Right, all right. Gosh, gobby you. Dead demanding!

0:07:29 > 0:07:32It takes one to know one. Tuck away all that awful hair.

0:07:32 > 0:07:36There's no way I'm putting that turban on!

0:07:36 > 0:07:40POD will not run the makeunder until those rat tails are under wraps.

0:07:40 > 0:07:44- No chance.- POD does not know the meaning of the word "no".

0:07:44 > 0:07:45Now, get wiping.

0:07:46 > 0:07:50- I'm going to need more than this. Look at them.- Why do you

0:07:50 > 0:07:53insist on covering yourself up with that awful make-up?

0:07:53 > 0:07:58- Cos I'm minging.- You're not minging, you're blinging.- Blingin' awful.

0:07:58 > 0:08:04You are one tough nut to crack, but underneath that hard shell, I'm sure you have a soft centre.

0:08:04 > 0:08:07- Sling it.- Maybe not.

0:08:07 > 0:08:13Ha! Run the makeunder in three, two, one...

0:08:17 > 0:08:21Oh, I love it.

0:08:21 > 0:08:24I really do love it, though!

0:08:29 > 0:08:32I don't want to start crying.

0:08:32 > 0:08:36- POD would like to know, are they tears of joy?- Yeah!

0:08:36 > 0:08:37I really do love it.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39I just look dead pretty.

0:08:39 > 0:08:44Affirmative. POD computes you look very pretty and very sophisticated.

0:08:44 > 0:08:48I've never been called sophisticated before.

0:08:48 > 0:08:52- You can see it, though, can't you? - I can't spell it, but yeah.

0:08:52 > 0:08:54Previously, 70% of the public wanted to avoid you.

0:08:54 > 0:08:57Let's see if we can change that.

0:08:57 > 0:09:00- Snog.- Hmm, I'd probably snog her.

0:09:00 > 0:09:02She seems like a happy, cheerful girl.

0:09:02 > 0:09:04- I'd snog her. - Take her out for a date,

0:09:04 > 0:09:06and you never know where it goes from there.

0:09:06 > 0:09:08In fact, of all the people we asked,

0:09:08 > 0:09:12- 90% wanted to either snog or marry you.- Aw!

0:09:12 > 0:09:16Here is your natural beauty data.

0:09:16 > 0:09:20A short, layered cut is a great way to soften and flatter the face.

0:09:20 > 0:09:23Use a fine sheen spray to add a natural shine.

0:09:23 > 0:09:29A dewy primer on a light foundation is all you need for a natural, healthy glow.

0:09:29 > 0:09:34Feel super-stylish and skim all your curves with soft tailoring, whilst a high-waisted city short

0:09:34 > 0:09:38is a great way to balance out a top-heavy frame.

0:09:38 > 0:09:42I look dead pretty till I open me trap.

0:09:42 > 0:09:44- I love it.- Goodbye, Your Majesty.

0:09:44 > 0:09:46Bye, POD!

0:09:56 > 0:09:58I'm just waiting for Regan.

0:09:58 > 0:10:00I'm really excited about seeing her.

0:10:00 > 0:10:03I wonder what she's going to look like!

0:10:03 > 0:10:05REGAN LAUGHS

0:10:08 > 0:10:10I love it!

0:10:10 > 0:10:12You look so nice!

0:10:16 > 0:10:19# I can change the world

0:10:19 > 0:10:20# I can make it better... #

0:10:20 > 0:10:24I think now I can see what everyone else has always said,

0:10:24 > 0:10:28that I am dead pretty and I don't need all the fakeness.

0:10:28 > 0:10:32I could go out with minimalist make-up on and still look really good.

0:10:32 > 0:10:35It's so different to what she'd normally wear.

0:10:35 > 0:10:40Sometimes less can definitely be more and I don't need all the eyelashes

0:10:40 > 0:10:43and I don't need all the tat.

0:10:43 > 0:10:47There's no cleavage, do you know what I mean, none of that.

0:10:47 > 0:10:54I will always be a princess, my tiara would go lovely with this outfit.

0:10:59 > 0:11:04Wow! Princess Regan looked absolutely stunning, but will she keep up her royal progress?

0:11:04 > 0:11:07We'll find out later in the programme.

0:11:07 > 0:11:10Now here in our kingdom of natural beauty, we have very strict rules,

0:11:10 > 0:11:13and woe betide anyone who breaks them.

0:11:13 > 0:11:19The style police are everywhere, so fake felons look out, because this is a bust!

0:11:21 > 0:11:24I hate it when girls don't have bras fitted and have their nips out

0:11:24 > 0:11:26or back fat out.

0:11:26 > 0:11:28You see the big bra strap across the edge

0:11:28 > 0:11:31with your back fat hanging over it, it's a no-go.

0:11:31 > 0:11:34You don't want to walk into a room and see boobs everywhere.

0:11:34 > 0:11:36It's not a comfortable thing to know a girl's nips.

0:11:36 > 0:11:39God, your cleavage is good, but your nipples are not!

0:11:39 > 0:11:42I have a vendetta against people who wear see-through bra straps,

0:11:42 > 0:11:45cos you are wearing a bra, so don't pretend. Just wear one or don't.

0:11:48 > 0:11:52Next up in line for the throne of fakery is King Scott Meadows,

0:11:52 > 0:11:56whose lineage goes all the way back to Leigh in Lancashire.

0:11:56 > 0:11:58Do I get a royal discount with these?

0:12:03 > 0:12:05Hi, I'm King Scott.

0:12:05 > 0:12:07I'm a hairdresser.

0:12:08 > 0:12:11- Hello.- I made the name "King" up.

0:12:11 > 0:12:13It reflects my personality.

0:12:13 > 0:12:20I'm the king of fakery. The king of the tan, the king of the hair.

0:12:20 > 0:12:22# Any which way... #

0:12:22 > 0:12:25Basically, the king of the world.

0:12:25 > 0:12:29Glamming it up on a weekend, that's what it's all about.

0:12:30 > 0:12:33# You better take me any which way you can... #

0:12:33 > 0:12:39So usually, I come to the beauty salon the night before I go out.

0:12:39 > 0:12:42- Straight on the bed. - You've got to get your brows done.

0:12:44 > 0:12:46The shape's really important to me.

0:12:46 > 0:12:50It frames your face. They've got to look good. Perfect.

0:12:50 > 0:12:56I've got to put my hair up now, out of the way, ready for the first coat of make-up.

0:12:56 > 0:13:00I love my make-up. You can be spotty, you can be greasy,

0:13:00 > 0:13:06you can be disgustingly ugly and you can hide it all with make-up so you look good on the pictures.

0:13:06 > 0:13:07Then we don't need Photoshop.

0:13:07 > 0:13:10If he didn't have fake tan on and he looked pale,

0:13:10 > 0:13:13nobody would be staring at him in the street.

0:13:13 > 0:13:18Who wants a natural look? I would say my best feature is definitely my hair.

0:13:18 > 0:13:22I mean, look at it. The faker the better.

0:13:22 > 0:13:24The bigger the better, obviously.

0:13:24 > 0:13:28And the blonder the better. You've got to love it.

0:13:28 > 0:13:30HE COUGHS

0:13:30 > 0:13:31Sorry!

0:13:31 > 0:13:36When I'm all done up, I feel sexual. I love it.

0:13:36 > 0:13:40# There's a place downtown where the freaks all come around

0:13:40 > 0:13:43# It's a hole in the wall... #

0:13:43 > 0:13:50Listen, POD, my crown is my fakery and there ain't no way I'm going down without a fight!

0:13:50 > 0:13:53- Hello, gorgeous!- Hi! - Now, first things first.

0:13:53 > 0:13:56How do I address your royal subject?

0:13:56 > 0:13:59- King Scott'll be fine. - King Scott, all hail King Scott.

0:13:59 > 0:14:04- Now talk me through this look, the hair is rather fabulous. - It's all extensions.

0:14:04 > 0:14:07- All of it?- Yeah, well, apart from about an inch.

0:14:07 > 0:14:09- SHE GASPS - I can't... It's rock hard!

0:14:09 > 0:14:12You've got to put loads of hairspray on so it stays big.

0:14:12 > 0:14:17- So how are you going to feel when POD strips you of this fakery? - Ugly.

0:14:17 > 0:14:24- No! No!- Yeah, no fake tan, pale, normal eyebrows, not big hair?

0:14:24 > 0:14:28No. I'm going to give her some stick, definitely, I'm not going down without a fight.

0:14:28 > 0:14:35I'm going to wish you good luck in POD now. I'll see you on the other side without your crown.

0:14:35 > 0:14:37MUSIC: "God Save The Queen"

0:14:41 > 0:14:46I am POD, the world's one and only Personal Overhaul Device.

0:14:46 > 0:14:49- Who are you? - Hi, POD. I'm King Scott Meadows.

0:14:49 > 0:14:51What are you the king of?

0:14:51 > 0:14:53I'm the king of fakery, POD.

0:14:53 > 0:14:55Before you were crowned King of Fakery,

0:14:55 > 0:14:58POD can see you were once a naturally-handsome young prince.

0:14:58 > 0:15:01That picture is disgusting. I look disgusting there. This is

0:15:01 > 0:15:05so much better, I look like I live on a Hawaiian beach.

0:15:05 > 0:15:08Is that because you have a pineapple on your head?

0:15:08 > 0:15:12- No, it's not a pineapple on my head! - Is it a poodle, then?

0:15:12 > 0:15:17- No, POD.- Are you more King Cone than King Scott?

0:15:17 > 0:15:19No, it's my hair.

0:15:19 > 0:15:22POD computes a king should have a more regal crowning glory.

0:15:22 > 0:15:27POD, that's very boring. You should come to my salon, I can do your hair for you.

0:15:27 > 0:15:31I think I can fit that in... on the 32nd of the month!

0:15:31 > 0:15:35- Do you really own a salon? - I do, POD. Can you not tell?

0:15:35 > 0:15:39POD is struggling to compute that anyone would trust you with a pair of scissors.

0:15:39 > 0:15:42You're so cheeky, POD. I like this look. It looks nice.

0:15:42 > 0:15:45Everyone loves me. I'm a style icon.

0:15:45 > 0:15:48The bleach in your hair has clearly affected your brain.

0:15:48 > 0:15:50Shall we find out what everyone really thinks?

0:15:50 > 0:15:55- Bring it on.- Consider it brought. Run Phase One...

0:15:57 > 0:15:58I asked your royal subjects...

0:16:01 > 0:16:04What do you think they said?

0:16:04 > 0:16:05Snog.

0:16:07 > 0:16:10- Play.- I would avoid him at all costs

0:16:10 > 0:16:16- and I just don't really know what to say.- Well, that's rude.

0:16:16 > 0:16:20I would definitely avoid, I think, just because he's too over the top.

0:16:20 > 0:16:23Too much hair, too much attitude, I think, basically.

0:16:23 > 0:16:27- No.- He looks like a woman. His hair look a mess.

0:16:27 > 0:16:29He maybe needs to go to the hairdresser's.

0:16:29 > 0:16:33That's ridiculous, POD. I think you should go and do it again.

0:16:33 > 0:16:38The results speak for themselves. 95% of the public spoke loud and clear

0:16:38 > 0:16:41when they said they'd avoid you.

0:16:41 > 0:16:44- Are you ready for my verdict? - I'm ready, POD.

0:16:44 > 0:16:48If you ARE a king, it would be William of Orange,

0:16:48 > 0:16:50with your fake tan, bleached hair and caked-on make-up.

0:16:50 > 0:16:52You're going to have my...

0:16:54 > 0:16:57- What do you think about that? - It sounds good.

0:16:57 > 0:16:59Run phase two...

0:17:01 > 0:17:04Please, put on your royal robe and cover up that awful hair.

0:17:04 > 0:17:07- Do I have to?- One does.

0:17:09 > 0:17:11- It won't fit in, POD. - Oh, yes, it will.

0:17:13 > 0:17:15There you go, happy now?

0:17:15 > 0:17:19Very. In keeping with the royal theme, off with that slap.

0:17:21 > 0:17:25- Done.- One can do better than that.

0:17:25 > 0:17:29- I hate you, POD. - Does that mean no OBE for P-O-D?

0:17:29 > 0:17:30Yeah.

0:17:30 > 0:17:35POD is beginning to see the birth of a rejuvenated and more natural king.

0:17:35 > 0:17:38- Good for you. - Are you ready for the new you?

0:17:38 > 0:17:41Run the makeunder in three, two, one...

0:17:49 > 0:17:51Oh, my God.

0:17:51 > 0:17:55Well, what do you think of your fabulous new look?

0:17:55 > 0:17:57Oh, my God. It's different.

0:17:57 > 0:18:01- Where's my hair gone? - POD computes that your head must feel

0:18:01 > 0:18:05a lot lighter now that the poodle has been sent to the doghouse.

0:18:05 > 0:18:08- Lighter, strange. - You look more like Prince Charming

0:18:08 > 0:18:12- than the king of fakery.- Will you go on a date with me now, POD?

0:18:12 > 0:18:16POD could never be involved in a royal affair. Imagine the scandal!

0:18:17 > 0:18:21- OK.- But let's see if there are any members of the public interested now.

0:18:21 > 0:18:23- Thanks, POD.- Based on your new look,

0:18:23 > 0:18:27I asked the public if they would snog, marry or avoid you.

0:18:27 > 0:18:29- What do you think they said?- Snog.

0:18:29 > 0:18:33- I'd snog him, cos he's got a lovely smile.- No way!

0:18:33 > 0:18:35I'd marry.

0:18:35 > 0:18:38Marry. He looks a nice person. Nice clothes, nice cheerful face.

0:18:38 > 0:18:40- Yay!- I'd snog him.

0:18:40 > 0:18:43He looks like a handsome chap.

0:18:43 > 0:18:46Yeah, I'd snog him, defo.

0:18:46 > 0:18:49In fact, of all of the people we asked,

0:18:49 > 0:18:53- 75% wanted to snog or marry you. - No way.- Yes, way.

0:18:53 > 0:18:54Here's your..

0:18:56 > 0:19:01A short, neat crop is the perfect way to accentuate fabulous features.

0:19:01 > 0:19:05A belted, short mac will flatter a broader frame.

0:19:05 > 0:19:09Choose indigo jeans rather than a lighter denim for a slimmer leg.

0:19:09 > 0:19:12Is it safe to say that POD saved the king?

0:19:12 > 0:19:15I like it, I think.

0:19:15 > 0:19:19POD computes that you're a right royal knockout. Long may you reign.

0:19:19 > 0:19:23- Thank you, POD.- POD would like to say farewell to the king.

0:19:23 > 0:19:26OK. Bye, POD.

0:19:28 > 0:19:31The king has left the building.

0:19:40 > 0:19:43I am very nervous about the way Scott's going to be looking.

0:19:43 > 0:19:46I've only known him with his fake tan,

0:19:46 > 0:19:50his massive hair, his outrageous clothes. It's going to be exciting

0:19:50 > 0:19:52to see him in a different way.

0:19:52 > 0:19:55She might have seen me looking rough in the morning,

0:19:55 > 0:19:59but she's never seen me madeunder, so I think she'll be shocked.

0:20:01 > 0:20:03Oh, my God!

0:20:03 > 0:20:05- All right?- Hello!

0:20:05 > 0:20:07- All right?- Yeah, all right?

0:20:07 > 0:20:10- You look well nice. - Do you like it?- Yeah.

0:20:10 > 0:20:11What do you think about my hair?

0:20:11 > 0:20:15- I actually love it.- Do you? - Yeah, it really suits you.

0:20:15 > 0:20:17Cos your eyes stand out loads.

0:20:17 > 0:20:22- Really?- Yeah. And your outfit is well trendy. Look at your shoes.

0:20:22 > 0:20:25- I know, I like these shoes. - I do. Cheers.

0:20:25 > 0:20:27I was very shocked, obviously.

0:20:27 > 0:20:32Cos I'm used to the dead big, bouffy hair, but I'm loving the new look.

0:20:32 > 0:20:37I do like the look. I think that I do need to maybe

0:20:37 > 0:20:40put the King Scott stamp on it a little more.

0:20:40 > 0:20:44Like I say, a little more fake tan, bronzer, and hair

0:20:44 > 0:20:45and then I'll be rocking.

0:20:45 > 0:20:50- Here's to the new King Scott Meadows.- Cheers.- Cheers.

0:20:52 > 0:20:56I think King Scott was working that look, but how long will it reign?

0:20:56 > 0:20:57We'll find out later.

0:20:57 > 0:21:01You know how difficult it is for those royals, all that waving,

0:21:01 > 0:21:03they have to keep their pinkies perfect.

0:21:03 > 0:21:07So here's a top tip to keep your nail varnish good to the last drop.

0:21:10 > 0:21:12There's nothing worse than when your favourite nail varnish

0:21:12 > 0:21:14goes old and gloopy.

0:21:14 > 0:21:18A good tip to bring it back to life and make it all new again

0:21:18 > 0:21:22is to put a few drops of nail varnish remover in there.

0:21:22 > 0:21:26A few drops in, pop the lid back on,

0:21:26 > 0:21:28give it a good shake...

0:21:30 > 0:21:33..and it should be as good as new.

0:21:33 > 0:21:35- SHE GASPS - Oh, not a gloop in sight!

0:21:39 > 0:21:43Do you remember the gorgeous Princess Regan from earlier on?

0:21:43 > 0:21:46Her outfits were a little bit too skimpy for POD's taste

0:21:46 > 0:21:49and she made it into a stunning natural beauty.

0:21:49 > 0:21:50And I mean, stunning.

0:21:50 > 0:21:54But has she kept it up? Let's meet her and find out.

0:21:54 > 0:21:55Hello!

0:21:55 > 0:21:57You look beautiful.

0:21:57 > 0:22:02- Oh, thank you!- Take a seat, tell me about your makeunder.- It's given me

0:22:02 > 0:22:05so much more confidence. I don't need all the fakeness.

0:22:05 > 0:22:08When I go out now, the make-up's completely toned down.

0:22:08 > 0:22:10I just wear foundation and stuff, and that's it.

0:22:10 > 0:22:14As well as the outfits and the make-up, you're like a different person.

0:22:14 > 0:22:17Not being rude, but your attitude was bolshie beforehand.

0:22:17 > 0:22:20- Yeah.- It's like you've had a personality makeunder as well!

0:22:20 > 0:22:23- Have you got a message for POD? - Yes, POD.

0:22:23 > 0:22:24I'm still a princess,

0:22:24 > 0:22:27but you've made me a much prettier princess.

0:22:27 > 0:22:29Well done, POD, you rock.

0:22:33 > 0:22:36Now, POD's final royal appointment is a real lady

0:22:36 > 0:22:39and I'm not talking about a Little Britain-type lady, either. Oh, no.

0:22:39 > 0:22:42This one is the real thing,

0:22:42 > 0:22:44a genuine blood-blooded, "let them eat cake" type!

0:22:44 > 0:22:49Lady Victoria Hervey is a former It girl who likes showing her bits.

0:22:49 > 0:22:52In fact, she's had more wardrobe malfunctions

0:22:52 > 0:22:54than a flat-pack with a screw loose.

0:22:54 > 0:22:56I first got noticed by the paparazzi,

0:22:56 > 0:22:58I think it was probably late '90s.

0:22:58 > 0:23:01Click, click, click, before I know it they get a picture

0:23:01 > 0:23:05of half a nipple showing. And that made like all the newspapers.

0:23:05 > 0:23:08So you could say her family motto became,

0:23:08 > 0:23:12"Show your baps and you'll get papped." It's worked so far.

0:23:12 > 0:23:14What will POD make of her ladyship?

0:23:16 > 0:23:19This is one meeting I can't wait to see.

0:23:19 > 0:23:22I wonder if she knows how to curtsy?

0:23:22 > 0:23:24Lady V, that is.

0:23:24 > 0:23:30# She's a lady Whoa, whoa, whoa, she's a lady... #

0:23:30 > 0:23:33CLUNK!

0:23:33 > 0:23:35I am POD, who are you?

0:23:35 > 0:23:39Lady Victoria Frederica Isabella Hervey.

0:23:39 > 0:23:41That's quite a mouthful.

0:23:41 > 0:23:43What's your name again?

0:23:43 > 0:23:45POD, the Personal Overhaul Device.

0:23:45 > 0:23:49And my senses tell me there is definitely something in front of me

0:23:49 > 0:23:51- that needs overhauling.- Impossible.

0:23:51 > 0:23:52Lady Victoria Hervey,

0:23:52 > 0:23:56what kind of attention do you get dressing the way you do?

0:23:56 > 0:23:58I attract magpies!

0:23:58 > 0:24:01They're probably attracted to the glitter.

0:24:01 > 0:24:04Are vultures attracted to your nest egg?

0:24:04 > 0:24:07- Probably.- Shall I find out if there's anyone out there

0:24:07 > 0:24:10- who wants to lock lips with you? - Yeah, let's see.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12They're probably like, "Ah, she's a slut,

0:24:12 > 0:24:14- "she's not wearing anything."- Close!

0:24:14 > 0:24:15Run phase one...

0:24:17 > 0:24:20I asked the general public if they wanted to...

0:24:21 > 0:24:23What do you think they said?

0:24:23 > 0:24:25Let's just say snog.

0:24:25 > 0:24:28How do I do that? I press that?

0:24:28 > 0:24:30Well done. Play.

0:24:30 > 0:24:31Snog her. She looks dirty fit,

0:24:31 > 0:24:34but I wouldn't take her home to the parents.

0:24:34 > 0:24:35Avoid, because she's got too much make-up on.

0:24:35 > 0:24:38I don't wear that much make-up!

0:24:38 > 0:24:39Yeah, I'd probably avoid her.

0:24:39 > 0:24:42I'm definitely too good for her.

0:24:42 > 0:24:43Too good for me?

0:24:43 > 0:24:47The results of the poll indicated a very split nation

0:24:47 > 0:24:51as 50% wanted to snog you and the other 50% wanted to avoid you.

0:24:51 > 0:24:53Yeah, that sounds about right.

0:24:53 > 0:24:55Are you ready for POD's verdict?

0:24:55 > 0:24:57Yeah, let's go.

0:24:57 > 0:25:01With your plunging necklines and glittery tops, you look more like

0:25:01 > 0:25:04a Vegas showgirl than a member of the aristocracy.

0:25:04 > 0:25:06I'm going to give you my...

0:25:08 > 0:25:12Well, I guess I do wear a lot of skimpy outfits.

0:25:12 > 0:25:14No duh, lady V.

0:25:14 > 0:25:18Run the makeunder, in three, two, one...

0:25:25 > 0:25:27What do you think?

0:25:27 > 0:25:29Yeah, I mean, I quite like the dress.

0:25:29 > 0:25:33But, erm, it's OK. I just feel like a schoolteacher.

0:25:33 > 0:25:38Previously, your old look saw 50% of the public wanting to snog you,

0:25:38 > 0:25:41and the other 50% wanting to avoid you.

0:25:41 > 0:25:43- Would you like to know what they said now?- I don't care.

0:25:43 > 0:25:46Let them eat cake, eh? Your manners could do with a bit of work.

0:25:46 > 0:25:49- Sorry...public.- Play.

0:25:49 > 0:25:51- I'd snog her.- I'd snog her because she's attractive.

0:25:51 > 0:25:54A definite snog, because she's a beautiful, mature woman

0:25:54 > 0:25:55and she has beautiful eyes.

0:25:55 > 0:25:57Of all of the people we asked,

0:25:57 > 0:26:0080% of the people wanted to snog or marry you.

0:26:00 > 0:26:04You know, I would wear this like, for a beach party with sandals.

0:26:04 > 0:26:06Don't let POD stop you.

0:26:06 > 0:26:10- There's a train leaving for Skegness in half an hour.- Let's go!

0:26:10 > 0:26:13- You can buy the whelks!- Bye.

0:26:16 > 0:26:20Do you remember King Scott from earlier on in the show?

0:26:20 > 0:26:22POD took away his extensions and his fakery crown

0:26:22 > 0:26:26and made him into a natural beauty, but has he kept it up?

0:26:26 > 0:26:27Let's find out.

0:26:27 > 0:26:30So, young man, the extensions are back, the make-up is back.

0:26:30 > 0:26:33- King Scott is back! - HE LAUGHS

0:26:33 > 0:26:37- How did you feel about your makeunder?- I didn't like it.

0:26:37 > 0:26:39- Not one iota?- Not one bit, no.

0:26:39 > 0:26:41My friends liked it, but I think they wanted me

0:26:41 > 0:26:45to put my own style on it. Bit too plain for me.

0:26:45 > 0:26:47POD took away your extensions.

0:26:47 > 0:26:50How long did it take for them to go back in?

0:26:50 > 0:26:53Cos my hair was cut short, I couldn't fit them in,

0:26:53 > 0:26:55so I had to wear a hat for a week.

0:26:55 > 0:26:57I didn't want anyone seeing my hair.

0:26:57 > 0:26:59Wore the hat for a week, then they were back in.

0:26:59 > 0:27:03So, the makeunder has just completely confirmed

0:27:03 > 0:27:07that you are who you are and you are loving the fakery?

0:27:07 > 0:27:11Definitely, 100%. Fakery rules.

0:27:11 > 0:27:12I'm really sorry, POD,

0:27:12 > 0:27:15but I think we're going have to admit defeat on this one.

0:27:15 > 0:27:20- Have you got a message for her? - Sorry, POD, looks like you lose.

0:27:22 > 0:27:26POD, you certainly ruled your kingdom with a rod of iron today.

0:27:26 > 0:27:27I bow to your superior skills.

0:27:27 > 0:27:30It's all in the line of duty,

0:27:30 > 0:27:33but when it comes to fakery, POD reigns supreme.

0:27:33 > 0:27:34You certainly do, POD, although with Princess Regan,

0:27:34 > 0:27:37I thought it was going to be a close call there.

0:27:37 > 0:27:39Have more faith, Jenny Frost.

0:27:39 > 0:27:41POD is not amused.

0:27:41 > 0:27:44Sorry, POD, I do hope you will grant me a royal pardon.

0:27:44 > 0:27:47POD will think about it. In the meantime, I think my lens

0:27:47 > 0:27:51would look lovely with a royal crest and maybe a few jewels around it?

0:27:51 > 0:27:53I think you've got delusions of grandeur, POD.

0:27:53 > 0:27:56In fact, I think it's time for you to POD off!

0:28:04 > 0:28:07Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:28:07 > 0:28:10E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk