0:00:01 > 0:00:08This programme contains some
0:00:28 > 0:00:33It's BBC Three's brand-new chat show,
0:00:33 > 0:00:38it's bonkers Dizzee Rascal...
0:00:38 > 0:00:41Saturday, Rochelle Humes...
0:00:41 > 0:00:43And funny man Johnny Vegas.
0:00:47 > 0:00:51Welcome to Staying In. Dizzee, what an honour to have you on the show.
0:00:54 > 0:00:57No, Greg, you shook the fist!
0:00:57 > 0:01:01That's a violation, brother.
0:01:01 > 0:01:05Sorry. He shook the fist. I'm sorry,
0:01:13 > 0:01:17Nice to meet you, Johnny. Cheers. And also, Rochelle, welcome.
0:01:34 > 0:01:37..people think that's such an obvious joke they're not laughing.
0:01:37 > 0:01:40fridge has genuinely broken.
0:01:43 > 0:01:45A glass of champers for you.
0:01:45 > 0:01:48Do I look like that kind of girl?
0:01:51 > 0:01:54Johnny, we tried to get some
0:02:01 > 0:02:03Well, it was one of the first drinks
0:02:03 > 0:02:07and you could buy in draught,
0:02:07 > 0:02:09you know, in a pop bottle. Draught?
0:02:09 > 0:02:12There's something about sherry more
0:02:13 > 0:02:18what it is about the sherry!
0:02:18 > 0:02:23Walking around with this? Yes. "It makes the fat man thin!"
0:02:23 > 0:02:24It's a bit of an old lady's drink,
0:02:40 > 0:02:44I drank a gallon of that earlier, as research, and now I've got the runs.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47What is your favourite drink?
0:02:50 > 0:02:53I order pineapple mixed with
0:02:53 > 0:02:55I'll just check the fridge(!)
0:02:55 > 0:02:58you've recently had a baby.
0:03:02 > 0:03:06Cheers to that. I can drink again. A lot of my friends are dropping,
0:03:06 > 0:03:10types of mums - the mums that never
0:03:13 > 0:03:16And the mum that goes, "He's two
0:03:16 > 0:03:20Are you somewhere in between? Are you getting nights off?
0:03:20 > 0:03:24I freak out unless it's my mum or my mother-in-law looking after her,
0:03:27 > 0:03:29I sort of freak out with anyone
0:03:32 > 0:03:35She's like, "Rochelle, I did go
0:04:10 > 0:04:14a newborn baby where I think the
0:04:14 > 0:04:17They've got the soft bit in the
0:04:21 > 0:04:23You're not holding my baby.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26We wanted to show a picture
0:04:28 > 0:04:31but we got one. It is a cute
0:04:36 > 0:04:39Listen, I'm into sex games,
0:04:42 > 0:04:44He's a friend of ours, right?
0:04:44 > 0:04:48I've got friends. I don't do that with them! Yeah. The joke is,
0:04:55 > 0:04:58so he'd come over and the joke is
0:04:58 > 0:05:01It's the next natural step, really.
0:05:03 > 0:05:06Marvin. Yeah. He's at home.
0:05:06 > 0:05:11Dizzee, do you babysit? Are you a good babysitter? Not really, no.
0:05:11 > 0:05:15If you left me with the kids,
0:05:15 > 0:05:18I'll tell you something quite inspiring, for a lot of the ladies,
0:05:18 > 0:05:22is how Marvin found you quite hot when you were up the duff. A lot of
0:05:22 > 0:05:26"You won't fancy me when I'm pregnant!" He just said it cos the
0:05:29 > 0:05:33cos we've got a gorgeous picture
0:05:49 > 0:05:56I met my wife, and she googled me and that popped up, and she's like,
0:06:38 > 0:06:42She still calls him Will 1am.
0:06:42 > 0:06:45He's a bit of a legend. He is.
0:06:45 > 0:06:47I've been in the studio with him
0:06:47 > 0:06:50but we didn't finish the song.
0:06:50 > 0:06:53He comes in, "Yeah, when I produce,
0:06:53 > 0:06:56"I don't like to be one of those
0:06:58 > 0:07:02and he went to another room.
0:07:06 > 0:07:10where we started and where we are.
0:07:10 > 0:07:12Dizzee, one of your first jobs was
0:07:14 > 0:07:18Oh, yeah, yeah. My mum used to get
0:07:18 > 0:07:20and I had to stay up all night
0:07:20 > 0:07:22putting letters in envelopes.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25It was like labouring. It was crap.
0:07:25 > 0:07:29Johnny, what were some of your first jobs? I had a few. I worked in Argos
0:07:36 > 0:07:40And there'd be people downstairs,
0:07:40 > 0:07:44It's a fucking extension lead!
0:07:56 > 0:08:00Sit anywhere you like. Take a seat.
0:08:00 > 0:08:06Ohh! Take a seat wherever you like. It swings a bit. There you go.
0:08:11 > 0:08:13Deckchairs are a good look for me.
0:08:20 > 0:08:22I'm not going to instagram it now.
0:08:22 > 0:08:25Can you get a picture of us three?
0:08:27 > 0:08:49I'll photo-bomb in the background. Wait there. Go on the swing, Johnny.
0:08:59 > 0:09:03Right now, um, I quite like
0:09:03 > 0:09:06I listened to her album recently. She's great. A wicked album.
0:09:12 > 0:09:15but I'd just like to sit down
0:09:15 > 0:09:18I've been on a plane with him and heard a few stories. Have you?
0:09:24 > 0:09:29What about the guys in the headlines this week? Kanye West - would you ever want to collaborate with him?
0:09:29 > 0:09:32He's crazy to watch on interviews.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38Did you hear his interview this week?
0:09:38 > 0:09:40He did it with Radio One...
0:09:40 > 0:09:44And he said, the quote was, "I'm the biggest rock star on the planet."
0:09:47 > 0:09:49I know Michael Buble was very upset.
0:09:50 > 0:09:52I don't know, I've never seen him
0:09:54 > 0:09:58You're making some cool videos
0:09:58 > 0:09:59but me and Greg just wondered why...
0:10:01 > 0:10:03we were cut from the final version.
0:10:03 > 0:10:07Let's have a look at the uncut version. I think we nailed it.
0:10:16 > 0:10:19# Every day's a never-ending summer
0:10:28 > 0:10:31# 160 blink and miss me super nifty
0:10:34 > 0:10:36# Effortlessly power steering accurately ready for action
0:10:36 > 0:10:39# Actually, your men are relaxed
0:10:39 > 0:10:41# Not taking no goddamn back chat
0:10:41 > 0:10:44# No ring, no chain, no fat chaps I don't get no sleep, no cat naps
0:10:44 > 0:10:51# Everybody wanna be on my black
0:11:01 > 0:11:07you always lording it up like that?
0:11:30 > 0:11:33Now, Diz, we couldn't help but notice in that video you were absolutely
0:11:33 > 0:11:37incredible at throwing a pineapple over your head into a bucket.
0:11:46 > 0:11:48Dizzee, come on, you've got to have a go. Come on, Diz.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55ALL: Dizzee! Dizzee! Dizzee!
0:11:59 > 0:12:02I don't want to shatter nobody's
0:12:02 > 0:12:06but you know, in reality, I threw it behind my head and they shot that...
0:12:08 > 0:12:11When it came to actually doing it, I actually got to stand there
0:12:16 > 0:12:18Dizzee kills camera man with
0:12:41 > 0:12:45See, Johnny, this is the life, right? This is quality. Quality time.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50I've fished for years - all my life.
0:12:53 > 0:12:56We've got one. Mind the magic of...
0:13:07 > 0:13:10That is the bra that, one day,
0:13:12 > 0:13:28So, you weren't always that adept at handling a bra, were you?
0:13:28 > 0:13:36They would send me in. I'd go over,
0:13:36 > 0:13:38once the girls were all laughing
0:13:38 > 0:13:40all my mates would swarm in
0:13:40 > 0:13:47"Hey, so I see you've met" and go.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49sort of my work here is done.
0:13:49 > 0:13:51So, you were like a Trojan horse
0:13:54 > 0:13:56I bided my time. Greg, is there
0:13:56 > 0:13:57floating in the river behind you?
0:13:57 > 0:14:00Hold that a sec cos it looks gross.
0:14:06 > 0:14:09I had a pet rabbit called Blackie.
0:14:13 > 0:14:17Had it been alive, we'd have done
0:14:21 > 0:14:22..turned up and wiggled his nose,
0:14:22 > 0:14:26and I would have known that people
0:14:30 > 0:14:32Cos I was going to school one day
0:14:32 > 0:14:34"Whose rabbit's going in the pot?"
0:14:34 > 0:14:36And I thought he was joking
0:14:36 > 0:14:40And I come home from school...
0:14:42 > 0:14:45and I went, "Dad, where's Blackie."
0:14:49 > 0:14:50Somebody must be in trouble.
0:14:50 > 0:14:54head and he'd been skinned.
0:14:57 > 0:15:01And my dad had fucking killed him
0:15:08 > 0:15:10But he did save me the paws
0:15:10 > 0:15:14in a bag to play with, and the tail.
0:15:14 > 0:15:16And I took them into school
0:15:16 > 0:15:19And she opened the bag and she went,
0:15:19 > 0:15:23"Christ almighty, it's like having
0:15:28 > 0:15:30And they rang home and they went,
0:15:30 > 0:15:40"Do you know your child's got bits of an animal carcass?"
0:15:40 > 0:15:42I'm so sorry I brought it up.
0:15:53 > 0:16:09Greg, what did you tune this into?
0:16:13 > 0:16:16I'm here with Dizzee Rascal,
0:16:16 > 0:16:18you're no stranger to pirate radio.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21you and I are quite similar.
0:16:33 > 0:16:36Some of mine were, too, to be fair.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39You must have enjoyed doing
0:16:40 > 0:16:43I was still in school, so when I first started I'd go and do it.
0:16:43 > 0:16:46I'd have the... One in the morning
0:16:46 > 0:16:48in the morning, and then go to
0:16:48 > 0:16:51like, "Oh, did you hear it?"
0:16:51 > 0:16:54But then I'd work my way up to
0:16:54 > 0:16:56if you hadn't got into music?
0:16:56 > 0:16:58What were your other passions
0:17:00 > 0:17:01I... Honestly, you know what?
0:17:01 > 0:17:03I didn't really have too many
0:17:03 > 0:17:05other than maybe athletics.
0:17:09 > 0:17:13Yeah, yeah, yeah. I liked training
0:17:15 > 0:17:17We heard you're quite good. I'll have a little go, yeah.
0:17:17 > 0:17:20Do you want to punch me in the face? Punch me in the face. Punch me.
0:17:20 > 0:17:22Don't punch Greg. Oh, don't.
0:17:27 > 0:17:29What would you come out to?
0:17:29 > 0:17:31Oh, that's a good question.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Don't you...? You like that song,
0:18:08 > 0:18:09It's connected. Let's do this.
0:18:31 > 0:18:33Yes, of course. You've got a question to ask him. I have.
0:18:33 > 0:18:43Dizzee, can you hear us on the line?
0:18:48 > 0:18:50Dress it up, why don't you?
0:18:50 > 0:18:52"Can we just see some statements,
0:18:52 > 0:18:55I have your First Direct statement?"
0:18:59 > 0:19:02I'm just going to turn on the high
0:19:06 > 0:19:08What's the biggest thing you
0:19:08 > 0:19:11This year, I haven't bought anything too big. I'm stacking for next year.
0:19:11 > 0:19:15Who have we got on the line? Peter.
0:19:23 > 0:19:25Yes, Liverpool in the house.
0:19:26 > 0:19:30What's the most embarrassing thing
0:19:34 > 0:19:37..on Instagram like virals people
0:19:37 > 0:19:40and then I thought, "Why don't I find the time I fell off stage."
0:19:41 > 0:19:44And I'm giving everyone permission to go and look at it now and have a
0:19:44 > 0:19:47good laugh cos that's definitely the most embarrassing thing that
0:19:52 > 0:19:55I was DJing, as well and that was the talk of the night. It was ridiculous.
0:19:55 > 0:19:56My arms were like a cartwheel.
0:19:58 > 0:20:02introducing my new song at the time.
0:20:04 > 0:20:06And everything was all popping off.
0:20:06 > 0:20:08It was all great and I didn't see
0:20:08 > 0:20:11for some reason, even though
0:20:11 > 0:20:12And I was like, "Yeah", gone.
0:20:14 > 0:20:18Can I have your permission to show it to the nation. Go through, man.
0:20:29 > 0:20:35Do you want a hand with that wire?
0:20:35 > 0:20:38Have you got a question for Dizzee? I have, yeah. Hello, is that Dizzee?
0:21:04 > 0:21:06Oh, you really want an answer? Yeah.
0:21:11 > 0:21:15compost of a bone meal mix?
0:21:15 > 0:21:17You sound like you've got all
0:21:19 > 0:21:23What's your favourite karaoke song?
0:21:29 > 0:21:34go for I Will Survive. Nope.
0:21:36 > 0:21:40The best karaoke song ever,
0:21:54 > 0:21:57This is where all the magic happens.
0:22:00 > 0:22:01Rochelle, you're a new mum.
0:22:01 > 0:22:03Greg and I are going to attempt
0:22:03 > 0:22:05sleep by reading you a story.
0:22:11 > 0:22:14In this story there are some blanks
0:22:14 > 0:22:17Based on the knowledge you have of each other from tonight's show.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22Once upon a time there lived
0:22:22 > 0:22:26were in a band called the Saturdays.
0:22:26 > 0:22:28They were called Rochelle...
0:22:33 > 0:22:39..Maggie Philbin, Chris Tarrant
0:22:43 > 0:22:47Rochelle met a hilarious beast
0:22:57 > 0:23:03Noel Edmonds was in the Saturdays.
0:23:05 > 0:23:13way more hilarious than her husband,
0:23:21 > 0:23:23he's ever done, which is...?
0:23:25 > 0:23:37Is it something on stage you normally wouldn't do on stage?
0:23:44 > 0:23:49Genuinely, I was doing a gig.
0:23:54 > 0:23:57I had a guy come in reviewing me
0:23:57 > 0:23:59"Are you the comedy reviewer?"
0:23:59 > 0:24:02"No, I normally do the pet shows."
0:24:02 > 0:24:03I went, "Are you kidding?" He went,
0:24:03 > 0:24:08a joke I squeezed out the tiniest...
0:24:14 > 0:24:17The Beast asked Beauty to marry him
0:24:17 > 0:24:21They lived happily ever after.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34Thanks very much for staying
0:24:34 > 0:24:36We'll have more amazing guests coming over simply to stay in.
0:24:36 > 0:24:40out it's the wonderful Dizzee Rascal.
0:24:43 > 0:24:48You all discovered my name is
0:24:55 > 0:24:58# All I do is flex, I don't need
0:24:58 > 0:25:00# All I want is sex, I don't need a
0:25:00 > 0:25:03# Fly out on a jet, I don't need a
0:25:03 > 0:25:06# Every day's a never ending summer
0:25:06 > 0:25:09Come on! Let's see them hands.
0:25:18 > 0:25:19# Super nifty, riding swiftly
0:25:19 > 0:25:21# Rolling through the sticks
0:25:21 > 0:25:22# Leather extra crispy, effortlessly
0:25:22 > 0:25:29# Power steering, accurately, ready
0:25:29 > 0:25:33# No ring, no chain, no fat chaps
0:25:48 > 0:25:57# With these hoes, macking, and
0:25:57 > 0:25:59# Fly out on a jet, I don't need a
0:26:00 > 0:26:02# Every day's a never-ending summer
0:26:13 > 0:26:15# God bless me, nobody can't test me
0:26:16 > 0:26:17# stay on the ball like Messi
0:26:17 > 0:26:19# Money and women are the only
0:26:20 > 0:26:22# Life is a game of chess, and all
0:26:22 > 0:26:23# How much do you want to bet me
0:26:23 > 0:26:24# That I never ever let a female
0:26:24 > 0:26:25# I ain't gotta talk no more
0:26:25 > 0:26:26# Cos soon as I walk in the door
0:26:26 > 0:26:28# Everybody stops doing what they're
0:26:28 > 0:26:30# Don't know what they're pausing
0:26:31 > 0:26:33calling for, been balling for
0:26:37 > 0:26:38# I got the flow and I've got the
0:26:38 > 0:26:40# And, this ain't a slow jam, ready to rock and I'm ready to roll,
0:26:41 > 0:26:43# Never gonna get caught slipping never gonna get caught tripping
0:26:43 > 0:26:44# Never too soft on the women
0:26:44 > 0:26:46# If it ever gets too hot in the
0:26:46 > 0:26:48# I ain't gonna stand there
0:26:48 > 0:26:50# All I do is flex, I don't need
0:26:50 > 0:26:53# All I want is sex, I don't need a
0:26:53 > 0:26:56# Fly out on a jet, I don't need a
0:26:56 > 0:26:59# Every day's a never ending summer
0:27:10 > 0:27:11# International, flex and go
0:27:11 > 0:27:12# When I'm at home, I stay low
0:27:12 > 0:27:14# Yo, lay in the cut, they can't see
0:27:14 > 0:27:15# And I'm living it up, they can't
0:27:15 > 0:27:16# Get on the mic, I get easy dough
0:27:18 > 0:27:19# Keep on fronting, like you don't
0:27:22 > 0:27:23# Get around the town, you better
0:27:23 > 0:27:24# I'll leave you breathing slow
0:27:24 > 0:27:25# Overstand, cos I ain't even
0:27:25 > 0:27:27# I'll leave you drowning from head
0:27:28 > 0:27:30# I play for keeps, you better know
0:27:33 > 0:27:36# All I do is flex, I don't need
0:27:36 > 0:27:38# All I want is sex, I don't need a
0:27:38 > 0:27:44# Fly out on a jet, I don't need a
0:28:00 > 0:28:27Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd