0:00:03 > 0:00:06LORD SUGAR: You haven't used any of your skills, any of the things
0:00:06 > 0:00:08that you claim you're experts in. A disgusting result.
0:00:08 > 0:00:12I don't want to hear any more from you. You're fired. You're fired.
0:00:12 > 0:00:14You're fired.
0:00:14 > 0:00:16APPLAUSE
0:00:22 > 0:00:23CHEERING
0:00:23 > 0:00:25Thank you. Good evening. I'm Jack Dee.
0:00:25 > 0:00:27Welcome to The Apprentice You're Fired.
0:00:27 > 0:00:30This week's task was to produce a children's book,
0:00:30 > 0:00:33so the candidates were extra careful to make sure their language
0:00:33 > 0:00:35was suitable for three to five-year-olds.
0:00:35 > 0:00:37Party pooper, wee-wee.
0:00:37 > 0:00:39Sniffle bottom.
0:00:39 > 0:00:43I shit you not, she absolutely put her arse on her hands...
0:00:43 > 0:00:44LAUGHTER
0:00:44 > 0:00:49Yeah, thanks, Brett. Good luck with that CBeebie's audition, by the way.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52Joseph had a tough time. It can't have been easy spending the day being
0:00:52 > 0:00:55shadowed by his mysterious Victorian lookalike.
0:00:55 > 0:00:58LAUGHTER
0:00:58 > 0:01:01APPLAUSE
0:01:01 > 0:01:04Yes, that is Lord Sugar's new aid, the Gocompare man.
0:01:05 > 0:01:10Meanwhile, April burned Charleine so hard, she became a meme.
0:01:10 > 0:01:16Personally, I feel, like, the bee story could be the most adventurous.
0:01:16 > 0:01:19What writing skills have you got?
0:01:19 > 0:01:21My degree is in creative writing.
0:01:21 > 0:01:25GENERIC HIP-HOP MUSIC
0:01:28 > 0:01:32And if you don't get that, it's because you're not street, like me.
0:01:32 > 0:01:36Joining me to discuss tonight's task, even though it's past their bedtimes,
0:01:36 > 0:01:39are author of the How To Train Your Dragon
0:01:39 > 0:01:42series of children's books, Cressida Cowell,
0:01:42 > 0:01:45broadcaster Gaby Roslin, and he's still only halfway through
0:01:45 > 0:01:48Snottydinks, so no spoilers, please, it is Romesh Ranganathan.
0:01:48 > 0:01:49Welcome to You're Fired.
0:01:54 > 0:01:55Well, in tonight's task,
0:01:55 > 0:01:59one candidate was hoping her team's children's book would be
0:01:59 > 0:02:02a monster hit, but instead, for her, it was all ogre.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04Ha... Sorry.
0:02:04 > 0:02:08Sorry, that was a terrible pun. I just said it without thinking.
0:02:08 > 0:02:11LORD SUGAR: Natalie, your pitch was terrible.
0:02:11 > 0:02:14I'm not sure you think before you speak.
0:02:14 > 0:02:18You just haven't shown me enough. On this particular occasion...
0:02:18 > 0:02:19..you're fired.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31Ladies and gentlemen, please well, Natalie Dean!
0:02:31 > 0:02:33APPLAUSE
0:02:36 > 0:02:39Come and sit down. Come and sit down.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44Natalie, welcome to You're Fired. It's good to see you.
0:02:44 > 0:02:47I don't know who was more upset, you or Sam.
0:02:47 > 0:02:49I know, he didn't look happy, did he? It was.
0:02:49 > 0:02:51How did you feel at the time?
0:02:51 > 0:02:53Not as upset as Sam looked, it would appear.
0:02:53 > 0:02:56He was. He was really... Because it must be very emotional.
0:02:56 > 0:02:59You've all worked and lived together for four or five weeks.
0:02:59 > 0:03:03Suddenly, up against each other in the boardroom. And how did that feel?
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Well, it was really difficult
0:03:05 > 0:03:07because I really like Sam, and got on with him so well,
0:03:07 > 0:03:10and to be in that situation with him, it wasn't very nice.
0:03:10 > 0:03:13It wasn't nice, was it? Plus, to make things worse,
0:03:13 > 0:03:16you'd had a terrible cold that week, which wasn't good. Yeah.
0:03:16 > 0:03:20Did that generally affect your... your whole performance, do you feel?
0:03:20 > 0:03:22I'd didn't feel great, but I don't know if it would have gone
0:03:22 > 0:03:25that much differently if I didn't have a cold, really.
0:03:25 > 0:03:28I really think you could have... Because you played it very well.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31You set it up, and you said, "I've got a bit of a cough," etc.
0:03:31 > 0:03:32And then you said it in the boardroom.
0:03:32 > 0:03:35I definitely think you should have done it in the bookshop.
0:03:35 > 0:03:36You know, when she said,
0:03:36 > 0:03:39"What are your percentages?", you should have just collapsed.
0:03:39 > 0:03:42Just had a coughing fit and fallen to the floor.
0:03:42 > 0:03:43Maybe I should, yeah.
0:03:43 > 0:03:46Well, Lord Sugar said you didn't show him enough
0:03:46 > 0:03:47of what you could really do.
0:03:47 > 0:03:49Let's have a look at what you did show him.
0:03:49 > 0:03:51The key to this is selling, isn't it?
0:03:51 > 0:03:53I wanted Natalie and myself to do the pitch
0:03:53 > 0:03:55to the national book retailer.
0:03:55 > 0:03:57SHE COUGHS
0:03:57 > 0:03:59I'm just concerned that if I stand up there to do a pitch
0:03:59 > 0:04:02and go croaky or cough, I'm going to look ridiculous.
0:04:02 > 0:04:06So, Brett, Scott, and Natalie, you're going to trade. Perfect.
0:04:06 > 0:04:08I think I'd feel more comfortable doing that.
0:04:08 > 0:04:11Natalie was supposed to lead the pitch, but did a terrible job.
0:04:11 > 0:04:13What do you want to know? My discount percentage.
0:04:13 > 0:04:16Brett had said he was in charge of the finances
0:04:16 > 0:04:17and had been looking after them.
0:04:17 > 0:04:20And, so, I was a bit shocked he didn't have that answer.
0:04:20 > 0:04:23I supplied you with that information and you went in there with it. Completely disagree.
0:04:23 > 0:04:28If you buy under nine or up to nine, it's for ?4.89 per unit.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30You're a liar. Yes, I did.
0:04:30 > 0:04:32You're an outright liar.
0:04:32 > 0:04:34It was a disaster.
0:04:34 > 0:04:35So, the bus?
0:04:35 > 0:04:36LAUGHTER
0:04:36 > 0:04:38Didn't really show a lot, did I?
0:04:38 > 0:04:41I've got to ask you, did you get on the same bus, you and Brett?
0:04:41 > 0:04:44Or was there a bit of an atmosphere? That task, me and Brett,
0:04:44 > 0:04:47we didn't get on well, but I really like Brett. We got on in the house
0:04:47 > 0:04:49really well. In the boardroom, Brett called you a liar.
0:04:49 > 0:04:50What did you make of that?
0:04:50 > 0:04:54I think he got a bit confused. Ah, that's a good answer.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57He got confused. I mean, it did get quite heated.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00I know that when, in the taxi afterwards, you...you didn't hold
0:05:00 > 0:05:03back, cos you said you didn't think he'd stay in the process very long.
0:05:03 > 0:05:05You even said you didn't think he was very intelligent.
0:05:05 > 0:05:08Do you stand by that now? No, I think he'll do quite well.
0:05:08 > 0:05:11I think he's very confident and always says what he thinks,
0:05:11 > 0:05:14which I think will probably do him quite well. I like Brett.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17I'm glad about that. So, the pitch in the bookshop.
0:05:17 > 0:05:21That, the one we saw, was a disaster, wasn't it? It was a disaster.
0:05:21 > 0:05:23Why were you so stumped by the figures?
0:05:23 > 0:05:26The woman asked us, "What's the price?" I was, like, "Brett,
0:05:26 > 0:05:28"you've got the figures." But he didn't have the figures.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31Then, I was doing the pitch, I should have had the figures,
0:05:31 > 0:05:33I was doing the pitch. OK, that's an honest answer.
0:05:33 > 0:05:36It went wrong for you. Cressida, I'll come to you first, cos, you know,
0:05:36 > 0:05:39Natalie was finding the bookshop owner very hard.
0:05:39 > 0:05:43Now, even at your level of success, you must still have to build
0:05:43 > 0:05:47relationships with publishers and film executives, even retailers.
0:05:47 > 0:05:51How important is it to have a rapport with these people and maintain it?
0:05:51 > 0:05:54Oh, it's immensely important. Hugely important.
0:05:54 > 0:05:58I mean, as a children's book author, you're also pitching quite a lot
0:05:58 > 0:06:01to children themselves and their parents.
0:06:01 > 0:06:02Lord Sugar would love this.
0:06:02 > 0:06:06You have a very direct contact with your market.
0:06:06 > 0:06:09The children's book industry is phenomenally successful,
0:06:09 > 0:06:13considering the competition. Look at the telly nowadays, Xbox.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15However, in the last 16 years,
0:06:15 > 0:06:18we have doubled the amount of children's books we've sold,
0:06:18 > 0:06:22which is extraordinary. And it's partly because authors go out there.
0:06:22 > 0:06:25You can't hide away as an author any more.
0:06:25 > 0:06:27I've been to so many primary schools,
0:06:27 > 0:06:31I could practically be an OFSTED inspector.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33I'll come to you now, Gaby.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36You know, you're a very successful TV presenter, radio presenter.
0:06:36 > 0:06:39You always very quickly establish a relationship with the people
0:06:39 > 0:06:42you're interviewing. Is there a nack to that
0:06:42 > 0:06:44we could pass on to Natalie? Yes, I did feel
0:06:44 > 0:06:47that you weren't getting people's interest straightaway
0:06:47 > 0:06:49and you weren't listening to them.
0:06:49 > 0:06:50And you weren't giving them something.
0:06:50 > 0:06:52I thought you opened yourself up for an attack
0:06:52 > 0:06:55when you asked that lady what she liked in a book.
0:06:55 > 0:06:57I don't know if you would have been better off saying
0:06:57 > 0:06:59what was good about it, rather than opening yourself up,
0:06:59 > 0:07:02cos then she said "I like a book that really sells."
0:07:02 > 0:07:05And then you went, "We haven't got that, but we've...we've got
0:07:05 > 0:07:08"a new book that we think could possibly sell, fingers crossed."
0:07:08 > 0:07:11You know what I mean? So, Natalie, Brett said that you were nervous
0:07:11 > 0:07:12in the bookshop pitch,
0:07:12 > 0:07:15because you had Karren watching you all the time.
0:07:15 > 0:07:18How much more nerve-racking is it having Karren or Claude
0:07:18 > 0:07:20breathing down your neck?
0:07:20 > 0:07:23Generally, when you're trying to pitch a product,
0:07:23 > 0:07:25you don't have Karren Brady standing in the corner
0:07:25 > 0:07:27making notes and tutting. It is quite a lot of pressure.
0:07:27 > 0:07:30Yes, it is, cos you got off to a bad start with her,
0:07:30 > 0:07:32didn't you, in week two, with the shampoo?
0:07:32 > 0:07:36And you had claimed that people over the age of 46 are scared of change.
0:07:36 > 0:07:38LAUGHTER
0:07:38 > 0:07:40And she was... she was offended by that.
0:07:40 > 0:07:43Did you feel you were carrying a little bit of that on into this task?
0:07:43 > 0:07:47So, first of all, I'm very sorry to any women over 40 that I did offend.
0:07:47 > 0:07:49It wasn't the intention.
0:07:49 > 0:07:51Were you watching that, Gaby, when that happened? Yes!
0:07:51 > 0:07:53NATALIE: I'm sorry.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56I was and I shouted at the screen. You found it terrifying.
0:07:56 > 0:07:58What, the whole thing?
0:07:58 > 0:08:00LAUGHTER
0:08:00 > 0:08:04Natalie, Lord Sugar said that you don't think before you speak.
0:08:04 > 0:08:06Do you think he's right?
0:08:06 > 0:08:07Take your time.
0:08:07 > 0:08:09LAUGHTER
0:08:09 > 0:08:11Thinking before you speak isn't easy, especially
0:08:11 > 0:08:14if you don't give yourself time to get a word in edgewise.
0:08:14 > 0:08:15Have a look at this.
0:08:15 > 0:08:21Natalie talks so quickly, I have never heard anyone speak so fast.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23I look after very high-value customers, make sure
0:08:23 > 0:08:26they retain with the company and also try and encourage them
0:08:26 > 0:08:28to spend more money with us, as well.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31I write pitches and present to businesses on a day-to-day business.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33I think I'd be really good in a pitch.
0:08:33 > 0:08:36Natalie...thinks and talks at a million miles an hour.
0:08:36 > 0:08:38I find speaking slow the hardest bit.
0:08:38 > 0:08:41Some might have the option of buying it in either country.
0:08:41 > 0:08:44We don't want get there and we can't sell it cos it's not safe.
0:08:44 > 0:08:47That'd be a nightmare. Everything is bom-bom-bom. We'd failed the task
0:08:47 > 0:08:51before the pitch. People will spend money on rabbits. I had a rabbit for years.
0:08:51 > 0:08:53I don't think you're passionate about the product
0:08:53 > 0:08:56and we could sell it. I can't speak slowly. I'm, like ...
0:08:56 > 0:09:00LAUGHTER See, most of those weren't that fast to me. What did you say?
0:09:00 > 0:09:01LAUGHTER
0:09:01 > 0:09:04Have you ever thought about taking up horse race commentary
0:09:04 > 0:09:06or something like that? I probably should, shouldn't I?
0:09:06 > 0:09:10OK, let's move on. We'll have a look at the book. Here we are.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13That's Snottydink, which is quite appropriate,
0:09:13 > 0:09:16considering how ill you were feeling at the time.
0:09:16 > 0:09:18So, Cressida, you've got one, as well. Have a little look.
0:09:18 > 0:09:21What do you think? What are your first impressions?
0:09:21 > 0:09:23Are you impressed by that?
0:09:23 > 0:09:26I have to say, in one day, I thought that was REALLY impressive.
0:09:26 > 0:09:30I thought it was original. It was really original.
0:09:30 > 0:09:32I'm glad you said that. I liked it, as well.
0:09:32 > 0:09:35Yes, you bond with the character. Completely.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38And the graphics are great, the words are great, the rhymes,
0:09:38 > 0:09:41the rhythm, everything. And I would happily read this to my youngest.
0:09:41 > 0:09:46I'm not sure about it. My issue with it... I do think it's good.
0:09:46 > 0:09:48I think the pictures are good, it looks good,
0:09:48 > 0:09:51the covers are good and everything. My biggest issue is the long words.
0:09:51 > 0:09:55I know you sold it as a thing that kids should learn new words,
0:09:55 > 0:09:58but a kid with an extensive vocabulary is creepy.
0:09:58 > 0:10:02You know... If I was in the park with my kid, he said,
0:10:02 > 0:10:04"Daddy, look at that moisture-loving plant,"
0:10:04 > 0:10:06I'd say, "Shut up, you weirdo.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08"You sound like a freak." "Daddy, quell your anger."
0:10:08 > 0:10:10"You're not helping!"
0:10:10 > 0:10:11I got a little bit worried.
0:10:11 > 0:10:14I thought maybe you were all drinking a bit too much.
0:10:14 > 0:10:16It seems to me that some of the rhymes only work if you're drunk.
0:10:16 > 0:10:18This bit.
0:10:18 > 0:10:21'The water he blew was not only useful
0:10:21 > 0:10:24'He could make things, too, that were bright and byoo-full.'
0:10:24 > 0:10:26LAUGHTER
0:10:26 > 0:10:29That only works if you had a bottle of wine. I think it does, yeah.
0:10:29 > 0:10:33There's nothing wrong, though, with having new words in a book,
0:10:33 > 0:10:36are there? Are you conscious of doing that when you're writing?
0:10:36 > 0:10:39I do use longer words in my books for 8-12-year-olds,
0:10:39 > 0:10:42but I have to say, for three to five,
0:10:42 > 0:10:45I would be a bit more careful about using shorter words.
0:10:45 > 0:10:47So, what, during the creative stage,
0:10:47 > 0:10:50you're coming up with this book, what was it like to be
0:10:50 > 0:10:54in the presence of Sam, when he was in his creative frenzy?
0:10:54 > 0:10:57How involved were you? Or did you just have to sit back in awe?
0:10:57 > 0:11:01I think the problem with Sam was, in this task, he had too many ideas
0:11:01 > 0:11:04and he couldn't decide what he actually wanted to do.
0:11:04 > 0:11:07So, in the end, it was me who came up with the idea of the story,
0:11:07 > 0:11:10what would happen. Then, Elle and Sam wrote it,
0:11:10 > 0:11:12because their English is fantastic, both of them.
0:11:12 > 0:11:15And Scott drew the pictures, cos he's good at drawing.
0:11:15 > 0:11:16So, it was very much a team effort.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19Did Scott actually draw the pictures that are in there now?
0:11:19 > 0:11:21Well, he... That was his vision?
0:11:21 > 0:11:24A graphic designer will make them look more sparkly.
0:11:24 > 0:11:26It's impressive, that.
0:11:26 > 0:11:29Well, as we've seen, project manager of Connexus was Sam,
0:11:29 > 0:11:32who Lord Sugar criticised for not having a very business-like approach.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35Let's have a look at him in action. Or not, in his case.
0:11:35 > 0:11:38A story dies without good plot.
0:11:38 > 0:11:39I mean, obviously, there is
0:11:39 > 0:11:42this theory about Aristotle thinking plot is the most important thing.
0:11:42 > 0:11:45I don't know how much you can relate, sort of,
0:11:45 > 0:11:47a tragedy with children's literature.
0:11:47 > 0:11:48At times, I felt I was
0:11:48 > 0:11:51watching you try to write the sequel to King Lear.
0:11:51 > 0:11:54What I wanted to do was come up with a moral story that included
0:11:54 > 0:11:56creatures, or an overcoming the monsters story that included
0:11:56 > 0:11:59a bit of a moral, or an adventure story.
0:11:59 > 0:12:01The adventure story one, I'm slightly confused on.
0:12:01 > 0:12:03They've been in their meeting
0:12:03 > 0:12:06for a few hours, but haven't really nailed anything down.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08We're going around the houses now. As PM, what do you reckon?
0:12:08 > 0:12:09Um...
0:12:09 > 0:12:13Now, I... My preference is... What do you think?
0:12:13 > 0:12:15Who are you bringing back into this boardroom?
0:12:21 > 0:12:23There you are again.
0:12:23 > 0:12:25He just takes so long to reach a decision.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30See, Natalie, somewhere between you and Sam
0:12:30 > 0:12:33is the perfect speed at which to talk.
0:12:33 > 0:12:37That's what you want to aim at. What was Sam like as a project manager?
0:12:37 > 0:12:39Indecisive. But I think that's because he's so nice,
0:12:39 > 0:12:41he wanted to please everybody. Right. Did you feel like he was
0:12:41 > 0:12:44under pressure because Lord Sugar had said to him,
0:12:44 > 0:12:46"You're an English graduate, you should be good at this,"
0:12:46 > 0:12:50that he felt he had to create some masterpiece, rather than just getting the book done?
0:12:50 > 0:12:53I think he was trying to make it a lot more complex than it
0:12:53 > 0:12:55needed to be, because he was so worried about making
0:12:55 > 0:12:59a great product for Lord Sugar. Accused of over-intellectualising.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02Cressida, is that a fault? Well, no, he didn't call it King Lear, did he?
0:13:02 > 0:13:04He called it Snottydink.
0:13:04 > 0:13:07King Lear, in fairness, had been taken, that name.
0:13:07 > 0:13:08LAUGHTER
0:13:08 > 0:13:11He was thinking about it very seriously, but it had a message.
0:13:11 > 0:13:13It was about something.
0:13:13 > 0:13:17And it was about something much more interesting than the bees story.
0:13:17 > 0:13:20I mean, good children's books do have a message.
0:13:20 > 0:13:22And sometimes, it's quite a serious message.
0:13:22 > 0:13:24In the cafe, Sam immediately apologised
0:13:24 > 0:13:27to his team for losing, in a very gallant way, I thought.
0:13:27 > 0:13:28That was very nice of him.
0:13:28 > 0:13:31And he apologised to you in the boardroom afterwards...
0:13:31 > 0:13:33He was actually crying. He was devastated.
0:13:33 > 0:13:37I was, like, "You can go now. It's all right, Sam." He wouldn't let go of my hand.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40He genuinely felt bad. He's too nice. He's just a lovely guy.
0:13:40 > 0:13:42GABY: Can you be too nice? I was going to ask.
0:13:42 > 0:13:46Can you combine being a nice guy with being good at business, do you think?
0:13:46 > 0:13:50I think you can, surely you can. There are plenty of people who have done it over the years.
0:13:50 > 0:13:52I'm trying to think now!
0:13:52 > 0:13:54I think he made such a mistake by saying, "I'm sorry,"
0:13:54 > 0:13:56when they were in the cafe. What you've got to do
0:13:56 > 0:13:58is you've got to sit down and go,
0:13:58 > 0:13:59"Where do you think you guys went wrong?"
0:13:59 > 0:14:02You've got to be on the front foot, in that situation.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05When I was teaching, I would do parents' evenings and stuff,
0:14:05 > 0:14:07and sometimes, a kid would sit down and I didn't know the kid.
0:14:07 > 0:14:09I couldn't remember what they were like.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12I'd just say, what do you think I'm going to say about you?
0:14:12 > 0:14:14And just let them fill in the blanks.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17All the stories I hear about you being a teacher terrify me.
0:14:17 > 0:14:19Well, if it makes you feel better,
0:14:19 > 0:14:21legally, I'm not allowed to do it any more.
0:14:21 > 0:14:22LAUGHTER
0:14:24 > 0:14:26Well, let's move on to the winning team,
0:14:26 > 0:14:30Team Versatile, and to remind us about their book, here is Claude.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33Hello, boys and girls. LAUGHTER
0:14:33 > 0:14:36Are you sitting comfortably? I'm going to begin.
0:14:36 > 0:14:38This is Bizzie's First Adventure.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43Bizzie is a little bee... BIZZIE BUZZES
0:14:43 > 0:14:46..who sets out to make some honey.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48When he took flight, the wind went whoosh...
0:14:50 > 0:14:52..and poor little Bizzie went swoosh.
0:14:52 > 0:14:54BIZZIE SQUEAKS IN DISTRESS
0:14:54 > 0:14:57Swishing and swooshing, tumbling and turning,
0:14:57 > 0:15:00will little Bizzie ever make his honey?
0:15:01 > 0:15:04And if your nerves can take it, you can see the full, terrifying
0:15:04 > 0:15:08version of both books being read by Karren and Claude on our website.
0:15:08 > 0:15:14So, here is their book, which is Bizzie's First Adventure.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18I don't know if you have had a chance to look at that - did you see it?
0:15:18 > 0:15:21Very briefly. You're already turning up your nose at it.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23I just think Snottledink's a lot better.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26OK, well, Cressida, what are your first impressions of the book?
0:15:26 > 0:15:30I think this is dull. That is the real problem with it.
0:15:30 > 0:15:33Even though it doesn't go into pollination in great detail,
0:15:33 > 0:15:37it might as well. I mean, it is dull, I'm sorry.
0:15:37 > 0:15:40Gaby, do you agree? I've always read to my kids
0:15:40 > 0:15:42and I absolutely love it and it is our special time.
0:15:42 > 0:15:47This is for a six-month-old. It doesn't scan and it is dull.
0:15:47 > 0:15:50You are like one of the mums in the playgroup, who said
0:15:50 > 0:15:52she thought it had been written BY a child.
0:15:52 > 0:15:54I think, they misunderstood the whole thing.
0:15:54 > 0:15:58I think the key thing about a rhyming book is, it has to rhyme.
0:15:58 > 0:16:00I'll give you an example here,
0:16:00 > 0:16:02'Bizzie was happy all of a sudden
0:16:02 > 0:16:05'when he saw the chance to get so much pollen.'
0:16:05 > 0:16:08Are you joking? Yeah. Like, that's...
0:16:08 > 0:16:11Also, to be honest with you, I'm opposed to the whole idea
0:16:11 > 0:16:13of a book about honey anyway.
0:16:13 > 0:16:14You know, it is bee slavery.
0:16:16 > 0:16:18And, you know, what they need to explain is how the beekeeper
0:16:18 > 0:16:22comes along and nicks it, without contributing anything to the
0:16:22 > 0:16:23production process and making a profit
0:16:23 > 0:16:25after the hard work of the bees.
0:16:25 > 0:16:26Let's highlight that.
0:16:26 > 0:16:28It's quite a high concept,
0:16:28 > 0:16:32but not all households are as much fun as yours, Romesh, evidently.
0:16:32 > 0:16:35Would any of you have used this book to teach their children
0:16:35 > 0:16:39about the production of honey and what bees are about, in seriousness?
0:16:39 > 0:16:40No. You wouldn't? No.
0:16:40 > 0:16:46OK, so, mixed reviews for the book and, if it hadn't been for a
0:16:46 > 0:16:49last-minute sale, it might have been Charleine in the boardroom this week.
0:16:52 > 0:16:55I'd like to put myself forward as project manager for this.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58I'm not going to say I have the best vocabulary or best English skills.
0:16:58 > 0:17:02Once there was a busy bee who set out on his first adventure
0:17:02 > 0:17:03to find some honey.
0:17:03 > 0:17:06But that doesn't rhyme. To find a pot of honey. Does it not?
0:17:06 > 0:17:07I think it does.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10Who am I speaking to? It's Richard.
0:17:10 > 0:17:13I want to hear David swishing and swooshing. Just leave us to it.
0:17:13 > 0:17:19Please, Charleine, please, can you just let us get on with it, please.
0:17:19 > 0:17:21No, can I hear David swishing and swooshing?
0:17:21 > 0:17:23Are you going to be pitching?
0:17:23 > 0:17:24Yes, I'm going to be pitching.
0:17:24 > 0:17:26Are you sure? I'm doing the pitch. Yeah? Yeah.
0:17:26 > 0:17:28OK, but the thing is... OK.
0:17:28 > 0:17:33Swishing and swooshing, will little Bizzie ever make his honey?
0:17:33 > 0:17:36You needed to take your strongest pitcher
0:17:36 > 0:17:40to the most professional people that you were pitching to and you didn't.
0:17:40 > 0:17:42Bad management decision there, I think.
0:17:45 > 0:17:47That look is called schadenfreude -
0:17:47 > 0:17:50or to put it in children's book terms - ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
0:17:51 > 0:17:55On the whole, what was Charleine like as project manager?
0:17:55 > 0:17:57If Richard was here, obviously, I'd ask David.
0:17:59 > 0:18:01What did we think?
0:18:01 > 0:18:05I think, if I had to be told what to do by her, it would frustrate me
0:18:05 > 0:18:08a bit, as you could tell, people getting very frustrated
0:18:08 > 0:18:10with her, because her way was the only way
0:18:10 > 0:18:11and she wouldn't listen to everybody else.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14Whereas Sam... And everybody said he was indecisive,
0:18:14 > 0:18:18but at least he was listening to his team and being kind and warm
0:18:18 > 0:18:21and giving, whereas it was about her, I think, a bit.
0:18:21 > 0:18:25You think so? Cressida, what did you think? Well... She did, though.
0:18:25 > 0:18:29She came up with, actually, a better idea than the bee idea. Yes.
0:18:29 > 0:18:34She came up with the idea about the, erm... Comfort blanket. ..the comfort blanket
0:18:34 > 0:18:38and I thought that was... Oh, come on, a story about a blanket.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41Who wants to see that? It's better than the bee, trust me.
0:18:41 > 0:18:46And she did give way, I think, wrongly, probably, there...
0:18:46 > 0:18:51She gave way and she was keen on that bouncing and twirling bit.
0:18:51 > 0:18:54Swooshing. Swooshing - which was the only lively bit,
0:18:54 > 0:19:00so I think she did listen and I think she saved the day,
0:19:00 > 0:19:02as well, by selling all those books to the restaurant.
0:19:02 > 0:19:05She got lucky, didn't she? It was luck.
0:19:05 > 0:19:08It just felt like, at the last minute, they got a really good bit
0:19:08 > 0:19:13of good fortune and ended up winning with an inferior product.
0:19:13 > 0:19:16It was good for Charleine, because I think if she hadn't made
0:19:16 > 0:19:19that sale, they wouldn't have won and she would have been in trouble.
0:19:19 > 0:19:21She'd probably be sat here, instead of me.
0:19:21 > 0:19:24You could have been what absolutely saved the day for her. Definitely.
0:19:24 > 0:19:27The sub-team seemed very frustrated by her interference
0:19:27 > 0:19:30and trying to get David to do the swishing and swirling
0:19:30 > 0:19:33thing on the phone.
0:19:33 > 0:19:35But in fairness, she was the project manager,
0:19:35 > 0:19:37isn't that what she is supposed to do?
0:19:37 > 0:19:40But she asked for Richard to be her sub and, then,
0:19:40 > 0:19:43she wouldn't listen to anything. It was just to keep him happy.
0:19:43 > 0:19:47As well as sidelining Richard, by putting him into the sub-team,
0:19:47 > 0:19:51Charleine kept him away from the pitch, which he's really good at.
0:19:51 > 0:19:55Do think that she is letting her personal feelings interfere
0:19:55 > 0:19:58with her business decisions? Absolutely.
0:19:58 > 0:20:00Absolutely. Of course he should have done the pitch.
0:20:00 > 0:20:02If he had done the pitch - and he would have won -
0:20:02 > 0:20:05then she would have been delighted. If he had lost,
0:20:05 > 0:20:07then she could have brought him into the boardroom
0:20:07 > 0:20:09and gone for him completely.
0:20:09 > 0:20:13OK. Well, Mergim came in for some praise this week from Lord Sugar.
0:20:13 > 0:20:16He has already been trying to sell fish in a vegan restaurant.
0:20:16 > 0:20:20Now, he has sold several copies of his book to mothers in a focus group.
0:20:20 > 0:20:23He is emerging as one of these characters that would try
0:20:23 > 0:20:25and sell anything if it wasn't bolted down, wouldn't he?
0:20:25 > 0:20:29He a force to contend with, surely, in this process?
0:20:29 > 0:20:34I like Mergim. He's got a, sort of, an enthusiasm
0:20:34 > 0:20:36and an energy about him and he's always...
0:20:36 > 0:20:40He throws himself into everything. I do think that he's...
0:20:40 > 0:20:43Richard saying that's a deal. It's not a deal, is it?
0:20:43 > 0:20:45It's somebody at a nursery offering you a tenner just to leave.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47That is not a cool deal.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50But I think actually... Generally speaking, I think he's good.
0:20:50 > 0:20:51I think he's a good candidate.
0:20:51 > 0:20:53Natalie, how was Mergim? did you get on well with him?
0:20:53 > 0:20:55I hope you get to see more of him,
0:20:55 > 0:20:57cos he is one of the funniest people I've ever met.
0:20:57 > 0:20:59In the first task, we were all - "Who is this idiot?"
0:20:59 > 0:21:01We were like, "Who is he? What is wrong with him?"
0:21:01 > 0:21:04But then he, kind of, grew on everyone and everyone...
0:21:04 > 0:21:06He is so funny. He's just hilarious.
0:21:06 > 0:21:08He seemed a good... a good person to have around.
0:21:08 > 0:21:10He is. He is great have around.
0:21:10 > 0:21:11Throughout the series,
0:21:11 > 0:21:14Romesh has been looking into what it might be like to be a candidate.
0:21:14 > 0:21:16Romesh, what have you been up to this week?
0:21:16 > 0:21:18Well, I saw the task that the candidates did this week
0:21:18 > 0:21:20and I thought, because I've got children,
0:21:20 > 0:21:22I'm an expert in this area.
0:21:22 > 0:21:26So, I decided to come up with an innovative book of my own
0:21:26 > 0:21:28and I took to some bookshops, to see how many I could sell.
0:21:28 > 0:21:30Let's have a look at how you got on.
0:21:32 > 0:21:34Hello. Hello.
0:21:34 > 0:21:36I think I've got a once in a lifetime opportunity for you here.
0:21:36 > 0:21:40Hello, there. I've put together a book.
0:21:40 > 0:21:41OK.
0:21:41 > 0:21:42It's called -
0:21:42 > 0:21:43Santa Isn't Real.
0:21:44 > 0:21:46What do you think of that, as a concept?
0:21:46 > 0:21:49It's shocking and it looks appalling.
0:21:50 > 0:21:52Santa Isn't Real. That's the truth, kids.
0:21:52 > 0:21:55Have you seen the film, The Matrix?
0:21:55 > 0:21:59And I'm unplugging them from the Santa Matrix.
0:21:59 > 0:22:02Right in the middle of the pitch, it seems to be going pretty well.
0:22:02 > 0:22:05She is a little bit annoyed that I've stepped outside to talk to you,
0:22:05 > 0:22:07but it's just... I'm excited.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09Let's just cut to the chase. How many books would you like?
0:22:09 > 0:22:11None at all, thank you very much.
0:22:11 > 0:22:14Let's say, 20 books to start you off.
0:22:14 > 0:22:16It's a deal, it's a done deal.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18It's a done deal. You're robbing me. No way.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21So, you just want a small order? Erm, no, not really.
0:22:21 > 0:22:23What about five, just to get you started?
0:22:23 > 0:22:27Erm, no, I don't really think so.
0:22:27 > 0:22:29What if I lent you one
0:22:29 > 0:22:33and you see if there is any interest in it?
0:22:33 > 0:22:35This could be the next
0:22:35 > 0:22:36Harry Potter.
0:22:38 > 0:22:40What about if you just put one just here?
0:22:40 > 0:22:43Absolutely not. Goodbye.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45Thank you, but, er, no thank you.
0:22:45 > 0:22:48I think you're making a mistake, Simon.
0:22:48 > 0:22:49You'll regret this, Geraldine.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51I very much doubt it.
0:22:53 > 0:22:55LAUGHTER
0:22:59 > 0:23:01You could see they were tempted.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03I've come up with a whole range, actually.
0:23:03 > 0:23:07Just to give kids a real idea of what life is really like.
0:23:07 > 0:23:08Here's the next one in the series.
0:23:08 > 0:23:10You Will Never Be Truly Happy.
0:23:12 > 0:23:16Wow. And then I decided to come up with one that sort of helps
0:23:16 > 0:23:18the parents, as well as the kids.
0:23:18 > 0:23:20You know you have films that work for parents as well as kids.
0:23:20 > 0:23:23It's educational, as well as entertaining.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25It's called Mummy, Why Am I So Annoying?
0:23:27 > 0:23:30Natalie, what you think of Romesh's book?
0:23:30 > 0:23:33Actually, don't tell me in words. I want you to tell me
0:23:33 > 0:23:36using one of your famous facial expressions.
0:23:36 > 0:23:37So, is it Number 1 -
0:23:37 > 0:23:40A bit rubbish, but Romesh is in the room, so I can't really say.
0:23:40 > 0:23:44Or Number 2 - I'm glad I don't have to work with him, like you do, Jack.
0:23:44 > 0:23:48Or Number 3 - What you mean, the shredder is broken?
0:23:48 > 0:23:51It is, kind of, a combination of all three, I'd say.
0:23:51 > 0:23:52Yeah, fair comments on that one.
0:23:52 > 0:23:56So, Natalie, sadly, Lord Sugar isn't going to be investing
0:23:56 > 0:23:59in your business plan, but he has got some advice for you in the future.
0:23:59 > 0:24:01Let's have a look at what he has to say.
0:24:02 > 0:24:06I do like the way that Natalie sees things and actually sees them
0:24:06 > 0:24:09as they are and tells them as they are.
0:24:09 > 0:24:12But in some cases, she was a little bit to blunt.
0:24:12 > 0:24:15Throughout the period of time that Natalie was in the process,
0:24:15 > 0:24:19she claimed she was a great pitcher and presenter
0:24:19 > 0:24:24and I think, in the task on selling the books, she was very, very bad.
0:24:24 > 0:24:29And it was one of the reasons that led me to let Natalie go.
0:24:29 > 0:24:32Looking forwards, I think she really does need to brush up on those
0:24:32 > 0:24:36skills and she needs to develop a little bit more diplomacy.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40So, Natalie, what do you think? Which parts of that would you
0:24:40 > 0:24:44take on board. Which part of that advice would you go for?
0:24:44 > 0:24:47Mainly, to be less blunt. Where would you have changed that?
0:24:47 > 0:24:50Maybe when I was just responding to questions, I was very closed
0:24:50 > 0:24:53with how I responded and I should have been more open, I think,
0:24:53 > 0:24:55and look more like I was willing to take on board advice, rather than
0:24:55 > 0:24:57be like, "OK, whatever".
0:24:57 > 0:24:59It is time to find out whether we agree that Natalie was the right
0:24:59 > 0:25:01person to be fired tonight.
0:25:01 > 0:25:04Cressida, do you think Lord Sugar was right to fire Natalie at this point?
0:25:06 > 0:25:12Well, just because I really didn't want him to fire Sam,
0:25:12 > 0:25:15because I thought that it was a good book
0:25:15 > 0:25:18and it was a travesty that you lost, your team lost.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21So, yes, I would have fired you.
0:25:21 > 0:25:22Gaby?
0:25:22 > 0:25:26Meeting you in real life, you are a joy and charming
0:25:26 > 0:25:29but I'm afraid I do think he was right, because of the pitching.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32I do apologise. No, I agree.
0:25:32 > 0:25:34And last, but... Well, last - Romesh.
0:25:34 > 0:25:35LAUGHTER
0:25:37 > 0:25:40I don't think you should have been fired. I'm very surprised.
0:25:40 > 0:25:43I think you had a bad pitch, but I thought that Sam...
0:25:43 > 0:25:46as much as I like him, I think his poor direction,
0:25:46 > 0:25:50in terms of the business side of things, is what let the team down.
0:25:50 > 0:25:51Interesting. Good comment.
0:25:51 > 0:25:54And so to the audience. Folks, if you agree with Lord Sugar,
0:25:54 > 0:25:57hold up Fired. If you disagree, hold up Hired.
0:25:57 > 0:25:59DRAMATIC MUSIC
0:26:02 > 0:26:06That is looking pretty much like a Fired, Natalie, though...
0:26:06 > 0:26:09There is quite a big support group behind you, though. My grandma.
0:26:09 > 0:26:13Your grandmother. She has been threatening people on your behalf, has she?
0:26:13 > 0:26:16Natalie, we are really sorry to be losing you from The Apprentice,
0:26:16 > 0:26:18cos you've been a great candidate
0:26:18 > 0:26:21and a great character to follow and a wonderful guest on You're Fired.
0:26:21 > 0:26:25As you know, nobody leaves You're Fired empty-handed
0:26:25 > 0:26:28and, in the hopes that we could get just maybe one
0:26:28 > 0:26:30more of your wonderful facial expressions... Oh, God.
0:26:30 > 0:26:32..I prepared this for you.
0:26:34 > 0:26:35Good Lord.
0:26:35 > 0:26:37Well, I did it. Don't laugh.
0:26:37 > 0:26:40I don't really know what to say.
0:26:40 > 0:26:41Thanks? That's for you.
0:26:41 > 0:26:43Natalie, you have given us some great moments.
0:26:43 > 0:26:46Let's have a look at your highlights.
0:26:46 > 0:26:49# I really, really, really, really, really like you. #
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Lots of people have ideas, but ideas don't move mountains.
0:26:51 > 0:26:55It's bulldozers that do that and I'd describe myself as a bulldozer.
0:26:55 > 0:26:56Don't pull that face.
0:26:56 > 0:26:59She is just so funny, she has got an opinion about everybody,
0:26:59 > 0:27:03but does it in a humorous way. Yeah, I really like Natalie.
0:27:03 > 0:27:05Quatre. S'il vous plait?
0:27:05 > 0:27:09Natalie is the biggest talker I've ever met in my life.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11She, literally, goes to bed talking
0:27:11 > 0:27:13and, before she is even awake in the morning,
0:27:13 > 0:27:16her mouth opens and the words start formulating. It's hilarious.
0:27:16 > 0:27:18I made sushi, I never thought I'd do that.
0:27:18 > 0:27:20Natalie is cuckoo.
0:27:20 > 0:27:23You can tell she is happy. She is a lovely, lovely person.
0:27:27 > 0:27:28APPLAUSE
0:27:28 > 0:27:31That was nice. Ladies and gentlemen, Natalie Dean.
0:27:34 > 0:27:37That's all for tonight, thank you to Cressida, Gaby and of course Romesh.
0:27:37 > 0:27:41So, it on to task number six for our candidates.
0:27:41 > 0:27:42Any business partner of mine
0:27:42 > 0:27:46needs to know that making money involves hard work.
0:27:46 > 0:27:48You go like this. Sshhhh.
0:27:48 > 0:27:50# I want to build you up. #
0:27:50 > 0:27:52I can just about put together some flatpack furniture. Great.
0:27:52 > 0:27:55If we get this bid, do we have to do it?
0:27:56 > 0:27:58I propose it's easier to just paint the walls, mate.
0:27:58 > 0:28:00You've missed the deadline.
0:28:00 > 0:28:03We're not arguing about it. Listen, guys, we're cracking on with it.
0:28:03 > 0:28:06How much? ?500. How'd you come to that?
0:28:06 > 0:28:08What a complete waste of time.
0:28:08 > 0:28:10I think they're meant to be like this.
0:28:10 > 0:28:11We're just going to gut it out.
0:28:11 > 0:28:14There's a fork there which you might find useful. Wow.
0:28:14 > 0:28:16It could be a disaster.
0:28:16 > 0:28:19I need some help with the weeding. I need some help with the bush,
0:28:19 > 0:28:20there's too much bush. Voila.
0:28:20 > 0:28:23He's got the right to say, it was an incomplete job,
0:28:23 > 0:28:24I'm not going to pay you.
0:28:24 > 0:28:28We've painted over somebody's cat. LAUGHTER
0:28:28 > 0:28:31I cannot wait and if you missed any episodes of The Apprentice,
0:28:31 > 0:28:34Matt Edmondson has made a handy round-up of the series so far
0:28:34 > 0:28:36on BBC iPlayer.
0:28:36 > 0:28:38We will be back next Wednesday at 10pm, for more You're Fired
0:28:38 > 0:28:41when, alongside Romesh, I'll be joined by international
0:28:41 > 0:28:44entrepreneur, Lara Morgan and comedian Joe Lycett. Good night.
0:29:19 > 0:29:22Battery life on smartphones is the best thing about them,
0:29:22 > 0:29:25cos when the battery runs out, then I'll interact with my kids.
0:29:25 > 0:29:27We're down the park, I'm like, "Well, that's run out.
0:29:27 > 0:29:30"Better find out where they're going with those old men."