Episode 1

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:00:06. > :00:12.On the show tonight we have Australia's finest actress to. Make

:00:12. > :00:22.her feel at home, I have a Koala, and a couple of kangaroos. Now who

:00:22. > :00:47.

:00:47. > :00:54.would like a Coa what -- Koala Hello! Good evening everyone. And

:00:54. > :01:03.welcome! I've missed you. We have been away. I was asleep on a

:01:03. > :01:13.barbecue - look at my head. We have a packed line up. Cate Blanchett is

:01:13. > :01:18.

:01:18. > :01:24.here. Ewan McGregor is on the show. And Michael Sheen is here. Plus we

:01:24. > :01:34.have got Little Britain's Matt Lucas and yes, there is more, music

:01:34. > :01:36.

:01:36. > :01:42.from the fantastic Keane! I know! There is almost no time left for

:01:42. > :01:46.the show. I'm looking forwards to seeing Ewan and he will tell us

:01:46. > :01:52.about his new film, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. It is all about

:01:52. > :01:57.Salmon Fishing in the Yemen. Here is Ewan in the film. Now, looking a

:01:57. > :02:04.bit of an idiot in a river. But not the only time I have seen that

:02:04. > :02:10.recently. Yes, the Oxford-Cambridge Boat Race was disrupted by a

:02:10. > :02:18.protester. We have a close up of the idiot in the river. There he is.

:02:18. > :02:27.So brave. Mouth open in the Thames! What we're saying is the race had

:02:27. > :02:36.three cocks in it. His name is Trenton Oldfield. He was protesting

:02:36. > :02:41.against eliteism. Were you? I think somebody failed their A-levels! He

:02:41. > :02:51.has threatened to do it again at another sporting event. Here is my

:02:51. > :02:54.

:02:54. > :03:01.suggestion! Good luck! So looking forward to talk to Cate Blanchett.

:03:01. > :03:08.She has been in many films, and portrayed Queen Elizabeth I. The

:03:08. > :03:14.classic Elizabethan look. You still see that look today don't you? Of

:03:15. > :03:20.course the royals are gearing up for the Jubilee. The Queen is

:03:20. > :03:27.planning a giant flotilla down the Thames. Some have already got their

:03:27. > :03:33.places. They have! And it is hard to believe that Elizabeth II has

:03:33. > :03:41.spent 60 years as queen. Will take something special to get her off

:03:41. > :03:51.the throne. Let's get some guests on. We're going to chat to Matt

:03:51. > :03:51.

:03:52. > :04:01.Lucas and have music from Keane. First it is Mr Michael Sheen. Hello

:04:02. > :04:07.

:04:07. > :04:15.sir! How are you? I'm very well. And the Queen, Cate Blanchett. It's

:04:15. > :04:25.so nice to see you. Come and sit down. Cate Blanchett already. And

:04:25. > :04:33.

:04:33. > :04:39.it is Ewan McGregor. How are you? I'm very well. What a posh couch.

:04:39. > :04:47.That is good. I'm feeling confident, because we have all been trained.

:04:47. > :04:52.We have all been to drama school, with varying degrees of success. I

:04:52. > :05:00.knew Michael when you were at school. Yes. You were the funnest

:05:00. > :05:05.person I had ever mets. Even at the age of 18. What happened? I know.

:05:05. > :05:10.Ewan McGregor before you trained as an actor, musical theatre was a

:05:10. > :05:16.huge influence. Musicals, I spent time as a kid being different

:05:16. > :05:26.singers and a lot of time pretending to be Elvis. I spent

:05:26. > :05:26.

:05:26. > :05:32.time pretending to be Olivia Newton John. And Grease. Me and my friend,

:05:32. > :05:37.it was at the right time for me in those hot pants. We thought if we

:05:37. > :05:47.sat in class with our fingers crossed she might come in. In

:05:47. > :05:47.

:05:47. > :05:55.Crieff! This was a good problem, if it was, I would go she is here

:05:55. > :06:02.tonight. She is not! Cate, I have got to ask you about when when you

:06:02. > :06:09.were a student, you had, this is a bizarre story, you had a house that

:06:09. > :06:16.inexpensive to rent in Sid neer. Is this true? Yes. Wasn't it bizarrely

:06:16. > :06:24.cheap to rent? No, I stayed in a suburb called zet land under a

:06:24. > :06:32.smoke stack and everyone had asthma and somebody was mured in my room.

:06:32. > :06:38.When you were there. -- murdered. Somebody gave me a DVD of

:06:38. > :06:45.Australia's most wanted. Do you have that. Crimewatch. Or Britain's

:06:45. > :06:50.Got Talent. And the room in which I was staying, which was only $60 a

:06:50. > :06:57.week, I was watching it in my bed and watched a man climb through the

:06:57. > :07:05.win toe and -- window and strangle a woman in my bed. For years,

:07:05. > :07:14.thought this is my chance to meet a ghost. And then I didn't encounter

:07:14. > :07:20.anything until the day I left and I shut the door and I heard, Cate! It

:07:20. > :07:26.did send... There was no one there. Well I was there. I mean there was

:07:26. > :07:35.no one else there? No it was strange. But she was murdered in my

:07:35. > :07:41.bed. Had they changed the bed? It was $0 a week, you can't

:07:41. > :07:50.complain. One of big events of the year, is coming to bash can in

:07:50. > :08:00.April, and it your production of big and small. Gross und Klein.

:08:00. > :08:01.

:08:01. > :08:06.that what we call it. Its says Big and Small on the poster. We call it

:08:06. > :08:11.Gross und Klein in Australia. you tell us what it is about?

:08:11. > :08:17.Hopefully it is an experience. Is is a play you don't want to make

:08:17. > :08:22.too much sense of. It hatches in several scenes and a woman of

:08:22. > :08:28.average intelligence, typecast again! Of limited funds, who is

:08:28. > :08:34.estranged from her husband and that sets her on this quest to find

:08:34. > :08:44.friendship throughout Germany. The designer and the director call it a

:08:44. > :08:44.

:08:44. > :08:49.met aphysical road movey. It is almost like a dream. Big and small,

:08:49. > :08:54.by the Sydney theatre company and you run it with your husband.

:08:54. > :08:57.has been one of the privileges of my life to run it. There is so much

:08:57. > :09:04.talent in Australia and when we were asked to run it, it was

:09:04. > :09:13.fantastic. It is producing people's work and it is great. APPLAUSE You

:09:13. > :09:20.have given up your life to its? And you met your wife at work?

:09:20. > :09:26.a series called Kavanagh QC that John That you did after Morse. She

:09:26. > :09:33.was was in the art department and she was set dressing on that show.

:09:34. > :09:38.I was playing a young rapist. And I fell in love with her. I saw her

:09:38. > :09:42.and I knew then. I thought I want to be with her. And in a different

:09:42. > :09:50.way than all the other many, many women I had been with at that

:09:50. > :09:56.points. And I wasn't wrong. But I was in love with her and she was

:09:56. > :10:05.upstairs and I was raping Alison stedsman down stairs. -- Steadman

:10:05. > :10:11.down stairs. It was as good a way to meet someone as any. Oh that is

:10:11. > :10:16.horrible. And she is French? Yes. Does that back problem? Do you

:10:16. > :10:21.speak French? I understand a lot of French. We have been together for

:10:21. > :10:26.18 years. And I understand a lot. But my French is terrible and all

:10:26. > :10:30.my kids speak French. Listen they want to slag me off, they speak in

:10:31. > :10:37.French and I pretends I don't understand half of it and half of

:10:37. > :10:44.it I don't understand. When Australians get together, they can

:10:44. > :10:51.go offer into kind of language that I don't understand. Is tits pitch

:10:51. > :10:56.or the words? -- is it the pitch or the words It is the expressions.

:10:56. > :11:00.Didn't you teach Brad Pitt t expressions. He needed a few. He

:11:00. > :11:05.was in Morocco and look you put anything on him and he looks

:11:05. > :11:15.fabulous. He decided not to look so fabulous and to hitch, what do you

:11:15. > :11:16.

:11:16. > :11:21.call it when you hitch your pants up. Sigh money -- Simon Coull?

:11:21. > :11:27.don't have that expression. what it does, that is in the front

:11:27. > :11:35.it is Harry high pants. It is a Wedgie. That is if somebody does it

:11:36. > :11:42.to you. If you do it to yourself you call it. S & M. He had a hungry

:11:42. > :11:52.bum. It started to eat your trousers. Your wife gives you style

:11:52. > :11:56.advice. Before we go out I run by what she think. I put stuff

:11:56. > :12:00.together and can feel goods and she will go, oh that is not rights. I

:12:00. > :12:07.feel a bit, I don't know, really. But she is rights. I always take

:12:07. > :12:15.her word for it. In Salmon Fishing in the Yemen, your new fum the

:12:15. > :12:23.first half you have a -- film, your first half you have a make under.

:12:23. > :12:29.look like a Twit. I play a fishery scientist. He is in an unhappy

:12:29. > :12:33.marriage and he is repressed and has a Morningside accent. It is a

:12:33. > :12:39.hard film to categoryise. It is very British. Yes it has a British,

:12:39. > :12:46.the comedy is very British. It is an unusual film about a very rich

:12:46. > :12:51.sheik who is a passionate fly fisherman and has an estate in

:12:51. > :12:57.Scotland and wants to introduce the sport to the Yemen and if he does

:12:57. > :13:03.he thinks its will bring peace. I have to, I'm a scientist and forced

:13:03. > :13:09.into helping him by the British Government, who want a goods news

:13:09. > :13:14.story from the Middle East. We have got a clip. This is you towards the

:13:15. > :13:21.beginning. We don't like each other at the beginning. I thought I would

:13:21. > :13:30.introduce that. I represent the sheik's assets and estates in

:13:30. > :13:39.Scotland. He is a keen fisher march. He asked us. - efisherman. Water I

:13:39. > :13:45.must check. You want sparkling or still. Not for me for the fish.

:13:45. > :13:50.Fire require water. So it would save us time and let he keep this

:13:50. > :13:57.brief. Here it is very cold. It rains a lot. Here it is very hot,

:13:57. > :14:06.it doesen rain a lot. You see the difference? Your pointing to Saudi

:14:06. > :14:12.Arabia, not the Yemen. It is out on 20th April. In the film, you do do

:14:12. > :14:21.the fly fishing? Yes. Did you know thousand do that? No. You have to

:14:21. > :14:29.learn to cast the fly rod. Are you good at it? I'm scared because

:14:29. > :14:33.there is one back there. Not really. I learned to do it and then but the

:14:33. > :14:39.whole beauty of fishing is the trying to catch the fish and that

:14:39. > :14:43.is passed down through the generations. Did you catch a fish.

:14:43. > :14:47.No, mly caught my dog. You have to put the line bewhriends you and

:14:47. > :14:53.then push it forwards on to the water. There was a ponds in

:14:53. > :14:57.Scotland and I said, you got to have a go. She went like this and

:14:57. > :15:07.cast back and when she pushed its forward, there was a horrible yell

:15:07. > :15:18.

:15:18. > :15:23.and there is my dog. Its wasn't There isn't a hook on this. OK.

:15:23. > :15:29.one's eye will be taken out. Don't worry. Can you demonstrate a little

:15:29. > :15:39.bit. Basically, what it is. Right. Choose a rod. I don't know...

:15:39. > :15:43.you have a favourite? I'm not doing it. You have the line in front of

:15:43. > :15:51.you. Do you have any accuracy? don't know if I can do it. It's

:15:51. > :15:57.been a long time. I'm absolutely accurate. Right, so. If I grab

:15:57. > :16:02.Keane's symbol from this. If I grab this. Right. If I put this down

:16:02. > :16:09.here. This looks really hard. I think it's looks very hard because

:16:09. > :16:14.it is. A man this afternoon, who gaev us the rod, did it? He's a fly

:16:14. > :16:20.fisherman. I'm setting you that challenge. I'm an actor. I'm geting

:16:20. > :16:26.ready. That wasn't it. If you step down, they are scared it won't get

:16:26. > :16:36.caught in the lights. Will I be electrocuted? Yes, and that would

:16:36. > :16:37.

:16:37. > :16:43.be bad. Oh! That's amazing. look, I've caught it.

:16:43. > :16:48.APPLAUSE That was amazing. You mentioned

:16:48. > :16:56.your dog Sid there. He goes everywhere? I like to knockabout

:16:56. > :17:01.with him. Yeah, most places. That's him. He looks like a Womble. No-one

:17:01. > :17:07.has said that before. It's absolutely true. He is so lovely.

:17:07. > :17:14.He is a rescue dog. I did a film called Beginners, I knockabout with

:17:14. > :17:19.a dog called Cosmo. I realised I would not farewell without a dog. I

:17:19. > :17:26.love with Cosmo. I found him on a website in LA on the last day of

:17:26. > :17:32.our shoot of Beginningers. None of my kids... He's my dog. Does he

:17:32. > :17:37.speak French? He understands French. He is a bit like me, in that

:17:37. > :17:44.respect. My kids are like, "he only likes you" I'm like, "that's just

:17:44. > :17:51.the way it is". You love Sid am you quite like travelling. We have a

:17:51. > :17:59.treat for you. It's Dogs in Cars. These are a selection of

:17:59. > :18:04.photographs we found on the interbew. Dogs like to put their

:18:04. > :18:09.heads out car windows. It's pictures of that. Here is the

:18:09. > :18:14.classic of the genre. If you think the dog looks silly the driver is

:18:14. > :18:24.going 40mph and turned around to take that picture. Then some dogs

:18:24. > :18:25.

:18:25. > :18:33.don't like to... They like to do it stealth, stealth head out of the

:18:33. > :18:38.window. They like the feeling, but don't want to mess my hair! The

:18:38. > :18:44.best effect, long ears. That is a nice effect. So far, so far we've

:18:44. > :18:54.only featured dogs facing forwards. What happens if you turn your head

:18:54. > :19:12.

:19:12. > :19:18.Oh! And, most dog does love it. Not It looks like he's being held up as

:19:18. > :19:23.well. What are you doing, I'm going to die! Finally, if you r ever

:19:23. > :19:33.feeling depressed, just find this picture on the web. This is just a

:19:33. > :19:34.

:19:34. > :19:38.dog just so happy in the back of a Well done all the Dogs in Cars.

:19:38. > :19:44.There you go. APPLAUSE

:19:44. > :19:54.Now, Michael Sheen, very exciting, since we last saw you on the show

:19:54. > :19:55.

:19:55. > :20:01.you have got your OBE from the Queen. I have. Thank you very much.

:20:01. > :20:07.You look about 12. It must of been amazing. She thought she was giving

:20:07. > :20:11.it to Tony Blair. Did she? Did that come up? She did say to me... This

:20:11. > :20:17.is an extraordinary thing. We drove into Buckingham Palace. I went...

:20:17. > :20:23.There is you with the other Queen. The fake Queen. We drove in there.

:20:23. > :20:30.It was like dedgeya few. We recreated it for the film the Queen.

:20:30. > :20:35.I felt strangely at home.you get in front of the actual Queen and there

:20:35. > :20:40.is all these rules, the etiquette. Never turn your back on the Queen,

:20:40. > :20:48.and all this stuff. She has someone next to her going, "this is Michael

:20:48. > :20:53.Sheen, he is a hermit from Wales. He played Blair in that film about

:20:53. > :21:00.you". She comes forward and shakes your hand. She puts the medal on

:21:00. > :21:05.you. She said, "so what are you doing next?" When I told my agent

:21:05. > :21:11.in America that, she went, "everyone's an agent". The truth

:21:11. > :21:14.was that I was about to do a film called Tromn. I thought that

:21:14. > :21:19.wouldn't go down well with the Queen. She might not get. That I

:21:19. > :21:24.only have a short time to talk to her. I said, "I'm doing another

:21:24. > :21:30.film about ex-Prime Minister Blair. This one is about his relationship

:21:30. > :21:36.with President Bill Clinton". She got a spark until our eye, she went,

:21:36. > :21:40."oh, that must be awfully difficult?". She shakes your hand

:21:40. > :21:44.again. Because she must meet so many people, obviously, in all the

:21:44. > :21:48.time presumably a lot of people get rabbit in the headlights with her.

:21:48. > :21:58.She does this thing where she shakes your hand. When it's time

:21:58. > :22:00.

:22:00. > :22:08.for you to go she shoves you away. I come from a rough area and I was

:22:08. > :22:14.like, "oh", backing off. There has been Royal encounters on the couch.

:22:14. > :22:19.Cate you met Prince Phillip. I was invited for lunch. I couldn't

:22:19. > :22:24.work out why. I thought it must of been the fact that I played her

:22:24. > :22:28.ancestor, the other Elizabethan. I went and there was the Head of the

:22:29. > :22:34.Fire brigade and a nuclear rolgs. I thought what is the common doe

:22:34. > :22:39.nominator. It's an odd thing to be eating off crockery which says ERII.

:22:39. > :22:46.You get over. That I sat next to him and he said, "what do you do?"

:22:46. > :22:51.I said, "I'm an actor". He said, "I was given a DVD player for

:22:51. > :23:00.Christmas and I can't work out, do I put the yellow..." I tried to be

:23:00. > :23:08.of some use. I know you met Prince Charles? I did, yes. It was at the

:23:08. > :23:12.Leicester Square premier for Moulin Rouge. I was standing next to

:23:12. > :23:17.Nicole Kidman. I had been acting in Britain for ten years or something.

:23:17. > :23:22.It's the premier for the film that I'm in with Nicole. He said, "what

:23:22. > :23:29.do you do in the film?" I think he thought I was the writer or

:23:29. > :23:34.something. I say, "I play her boyfriend", then he was gone.

:23:34. > :23:38.Listen, Michael Sheen you had the most incred I believe time. I'm

:23:38. > :23:45.sure a lot of people know what you have been up to. If you don't,

:23:45. > :23:51.explain the concept behind your new film. The film is called The Gospel

:23:51. > :23:57.Of Us. It's a film version of something that I did last year in

:23:57. > :24:06.my hometown of Port Talbot over the Easter weekend. We did a one-off

:24:06. > :24:10.continuous, 72-hour live performance called The Passion of

:24:10. > :24:14.Port Talbort. It took place over the streets, the beach, the mount

:24:14. > :24:19.abs, in people's houses workingmen's clubs and everywhere

:24:19. > :24:24.over three days it involved 2,000 local people and it began at dawn

:24:24. > :24:28.on Good Friday morning, on the beach, with about 200 people

:24:28. > :24:31.gathered to witness something that wasn't really advertised. It just

:24:31. > :24:36.happened. By the Sunday night, there were 15,000 people standing

:24:36. > :24:43.around a roundabout watching me get cruisified down in front of the

:24:43. > :24:47.beach. So, this film is not a documentary. There were

:24:47. > :24:52.documentaries made, this is a feature film based on what happened

:24:52. > :24:56.that a director called Dave McKing has made. Were you worried about

:24:56. > :25:02.making it a film because it was such a special thing? It was such a

:25:02. > :25:05.particular thing. It was live, you know... 72-hours long? We didn't

:25:05. > :25:10.have an idea how many people would turn up. I worked on it for two-

:25:10. > :25:15.and-a-half years before we did it. You try and work out as much as you

:25:15. > :25:18.can, ultimately, have you no idea who you will be doing it for and

:25:18. > :25:23.how many people will be there. It was a particular live thing. The

:25:23. > :25:27.film of it, how Dave managed to make this film I have no idea. I

:25:27. > :25:32.said, "you can't have cameras here or there" I want to protect the

:25:32. > :25:36.live experience for the audience. He hid cameras in bushes and in

:25:36. > :25:40.people's houses and on tops of trees. There was even a tiny little

:25:40. > :25:44.camera on the top of the cross. This extraordinary shot as the

:25:44. > :25:50.cross comes up, where the camera is on the cross and you see what I saw

:25:50. > :25:56.as I came up. It reminded me of the joke when Jess custody calls a

:25:56. > :26:00.disciples over and says, "I can see my house from here". I could see my

:26:00. > :26:03.house! Dave has done the most extraordinary thing with this film.

:26:03. > :26:10.It's incredible. Absolutely, incredible. For people who were

:26:10. > :26:16.there it's amazing. For people who weren't there, there are images you

:26:16. > :26:20.would never seen. 15,000 people walking through a small town.

:26:20. > :26:24.directed the whole thing the live event. How do you prepare? Someone

:26:24. > :26:31.who know what is they are doing. That is like crowd control...

:26:31. > :26:35.was a point where I got arrested in the scene. We were out... Outside

:26:35. > :26:41.the car park of the seaside social club where we had our version of

:26:41. > :26:47.the last summer. The Manic Street Preachers played in front of people

:26:47. > :26:52.and Paul Potts sang. I came outside and I was arrested by local police.

:26:52. > :26:57.We were local community performers. The audience, we could only get 200

:26:57. > :27:02.people inside the place. Thousands were outside in the car park

:27:02. > :27:05.watching was happening in on the big screen with a bar in the car

:27:05. > :27:10.park. There was drunk people when I came out much I was arrested and

:27:10. > :27:14.put on a truck and put on trial. The crowd were going crazy. People

:27:14. > :27:18.said afterwards, if you'd said, "let's trash this place" there

:27:18. > :27:26.would of been a riot. The boundaries between fiction and ralt

:27:26. > :27:29.reality got blurred. It was hairy at times. We have a clip. Is it

:27:29. > :27:35.that moment? What you were talking about. You will see how it's been

:27:35. > :27:45.transformed into something else by the film. Yeah. Here it is. Answer

:27:45. > :27:47.

:27:47. > :27:57.me. I'm proud of him. Say it. are the King of this town. Say it.

:27:57. > :28:31.

:28:31. > :28:37.Are you ready for your journey? APPLAUSE. If you want to see the

:28:37. > :28:47.movie, it is on limited release from tonight. What an amazing thing

:28:47. > :28:51.

:28:51. > :28:58.to have done. Incredible. It is time to meet Mr Matt Lucas. Hello

:28:58. > :29:08.there. How are you? Nice to see you. Hello there my good friends. Don't

:29:08. > :29:09.

:29:09. > :29:16.get up. How are you? Sit yourself down my dear. I would have come on

:29:17. > :29:23.earlier, was - but I was having a poo. It is welcome back, are you

:29:23. > :29:30.living in America. I'm moving there in July. But I will have a place

:29:30. > :29:36.here. You will be living with Revel Wilson. Did you know him before?

:29:36. > :29:41.It was a weird story, I was about to film come fly with me with David

:29:41. > :29:46.and I got asked to be in the film. I said I'm about to do the show.

:29:46. > :29:51.But if I can come for four day and film a couple of scenes. I was

:29:51. > :29:59.lucky. I didn't know what a huge film it was going to be. Here I'm

:29:59. > :30:05.known for Little Britain, but in America I'm the creepy dude from

:30:05. > :30:13.Bridesmaids. We got on well and look very similar. It is spooky.

:30:13. > :30:21.is spooky. We just hit it off and want to write a film together.

:30:21. > :30:27.live in a house. Yes. And well done on your new show, on Tuesday nights

:30:27. > :30:31.on the BBC. It is repeated after this. Well not straight after.

:30:31. > :30:41.Because there is the lottery results. The euro millions. But

:30:41. > :30:42.

:30:42. > :30:52.just look at See fax. -- See faction. -- Ceefax. Is there still

:30:52. > :30:54.

:30:54. > :31:03.Ceefax? Yes for real people, yes there is. The weather that religion

:31:03. > :31:10.Tall sun. The Lego. -- that leg go, the digital sun. It started on

:31:10. > :31:16.Tuesday. We established that. your wondering why you're watching

:31:16. > :31:22.this show, it is because you're waiting for my show. It is the Matt

:31:22. > :31:30.Lucas Awards. It started on the radio. It is simple. This is the

:31:30. > :31:38.award show that gives the awards other shows don't give. On the

:31:38. > :31:42.first show, that is about to be repeated, you didn't win by the way.

:31:42. > :31:50.It is always someone in France wins the lottery. We have smuggest

:31:50. > :31:56.nation of people. Who wins? I don't want to give it away. But the

:31:56. > :32:02.nomination are the Swedish, the Chinese and the English. You see, I

:32:02. > :32:07.would say New Zealand. Would you why? Because they're so pleased

:32:07. > :32:16.with themselves. It's so pretty there. That jealous si, not

:32:16. > :32:22.smugness. That is your jealousy. Well let's go with Sweden. You have

:32:22. > :32:26.your real mother. Yes I didn't want the show to be too rude, or smuty

:32:26. > :32:32.like your show. You don't want to be rude in front of your mum. So

:32:32. > :32:38.she is in the show. Have you created a showbiz monster. Your mum

:32:38. > :32:44.doesen seem like a showbiz mum. is sweet and she has just retired.

:32:44. > :32:51.So I thought it would be nice to get her out of house. My mum always

:32:51. > :32:56.says, when am I going to see you. When I'm with you, she says, when

:32:56. > :33:02.am I going to see you? I say now, this is the seeing. My mum is just

:33:02. > :33:07.happy seeing me. Seeing one of her children. We have got a clip. You

:33:07. > :33:14.need to explain. It is Richard Madeley sing. Well it is like a

:33:14. > :33:20.chat show, but I want to get people up and about. A bit like you.

:33:20. > :33:28.Fishing. So we had a category, guests with the most comprehensive

:33:28. > :33:38.but useless piece of knowledge and he said that he knew all the words

:33:38. > :33:40.

:33:40. > :33:49.to Chatt a, noogoo Choo Choo. the station quart tore four. -

:33:49. > :33:59.quarter to four. That could be. Could be Carolina. You whistle.

:33:59. > :34:06.

:34:06. > :34:15.Then no not far. Travel cold. Going. You are. I thought it was a bit

:34:15. > :34:19.easy just to sing the words. So I made himy alternate word. Was it

:34:20. > :34:23.fun himing him with the ball. the people in the BBC said you

:34:23. > :34:31.can't shoot it in his face for health and safety reasons. But I

:34:31. > :34:36.did any way. Here is the actual award. It is a fat Oscar, modelled

:34:36. > :34:42.on me and the tragedy is when they're designing it, I was that

:34:42. > :34:49.shape and now I'm a lot fatter. Yes, that is what you can win. It is

:34:50. > :34:56.correct as you can see. You have got a bottom. I have a very pert

:34:56. > :35:02.bottom, but I am actually that smooth. I feel it is embarrassing,

:35:02. > :35:09.because you're naked. It is nothing you haven't seen before, Graham.

:35:09. > :35:15.lot of people have seen you naked. Yes. And you have your hand on his

:35:15. > :35:23.bottom. There has been a lot of nudity. Not tonight. Cate, have we

:35:23. > :35:28.seen your bottom or not? Would you like to? I did fly fishing, it is

:35:28. > :35:37.only fair. No I think I probably. You can't be an actress and not see

:35:37. > :35:43.your bottom I read you had a stunt bottom. On ehis weth. -- Elizabeth.

:35:43. > :35:47.I did ask for an upgrade. Did you fleet lady. I tkpopbt know if it

:35:47. > :35:53.was her bottom or mine in the end. But you don't see your own very

:35:53. > :36:02.often. How would I know. Did you like it? I don't, do you... Have

:36:02. > :36:12.you? I would look at your bottom if it was at screen. While you you

:36:12. > :36:13.

:36:13. > :36:19.were looking at her bottom, I would look at your bottom. I did what the

:36:19. > :36:24.butler saw, one of my first jobs. There is a scene, I have to jump up

:36:24. > :36:29.naked behind a sofa with a policeman's helmet covering my bit

:36:29. > :36:35.and bobs and it was like the blue rinse brigade and I didn't cover

:36:35. > :36:41.mice and there was this noise. Like 800 old ladies. It was such a great

:36:41. > :36:45.noise that I never covered myself properly again. But one night there

:36:45. > :36:50.was a flower vase on the set and for some reason there was water in

:36:50. > :36:55.it. Why would there be. It is a play. But it spilled and I didn't

:36:55. > :37:03.know and I got up from behind the sofa, slightly revealing myself and

:37:03. > :37:10.ran and hit the water and I landed on my back like this! With a helmet

:37:10. > :37:20.and I shot towards the audience like this. This woman was coming at

:37:20. > :37:20.

:37:20. > :37:28.it like that. Now time for music. Before tonight's stories in the red

:37:28. > :37:38.chair, with their new single Silenced by the night, please

:37:38. > :37:46.

:37:46. > :37:56.# In a city like mine, there's no point in fighting.# I close my eyes,

:37:56. > :38:00.

:38:00. > :38:08.see you and me driving. # If I am a river, you are the

:38:09. > :38:18.ocean. # Got the radio on, got the wheels

:38:19. > :38:20.

:38:20. > :38:29.in motion. # We were silenced by the night.

:38:29. > :38:33.# But you and I we gonna rise again. # Divided from the light.

:38:33. > :38:40.# I wanna love the way we used to when.

:38:40. > :38:50.# I lie in the dark, I feel I'm falling.

:38:50. > :38:58.# Feel your hand on my back, hear your voice calling.

:38:58. > :39:06.# I'm out of my depth girl, stick close to me.

:39:06. > :39:15.# Because the people in this town, they look straight through me.

:39:15. > :39:22.# We were silenced by the night. # But you and I we gonna rise again.

:39:22. > :39:26.# Divided from the light. # I wanna love the way we used to

:39:26. > :39:31.when. # Cause baby I'm not scared of this

:39:31. > :39:41.world when you're here. # And baby I'm not scared of this

:39:41. > :39:59.

:39:59. > :40:06.# Oh oh oh. # You and I we gonna rise again.

:40:06. > :40:16.# Oh oh oh. # You and I we gonna rise again.

:40:16. > :40:22.# We were silenced by the night. # But you and I we gonna rise again.

:40:22. > :40:32.# Divided from the light. # I wanna love the way we used to

:40:32. > :40:51.

:40:51. > :41:01.Thank you very much. Keane everyone! Come and say hello. Well

:41:01. > :41:05.

:41:05. > :41:11.done sir. Thank you. Hello. there room? Hello. Very good. OK.

:41:11. > :41:18.We can't be long, I'm not sure the sofa can take the strain of this

:41:18. > :41:25.many people. It is such a lot of people. That single is released on

:41:25. > :41:32.30th April. But the album is out on 7th May. And are you going to be

:41:33. > :41:38.tour something Yes the rest of the year. Or possibly just one week.

:41:38. > :41:48.You will be touring. All the rest have been No 1 albums? Yes they

:41:48. > :41:48.

:41:48. > :41:58.have. APPLAUSE Very good. I like it a lot. Before we go. A story in the

:41:58. > :41:59.

:41:59. > :42:05.red chair. Who is up first? Hello. Hi. What is your name. Debbie.

:42:05. > :42:15.Where are you from? I live in London, but from Sri Lanka. What do

:42:15. > :42:22.

:42:22. > :42:32.you do in London? I'm story teller. I think that was the right decision.

:42:32. > :42:35.

:42:35. > :42:45.A story teller. Is it wrong to call a woman hirsute? Yes. Hello. What

:42:45. > :42:54.

:42:54. > :43:04.is your name? Tim. Where are you from? Brisbane. He is from Brisbane.

:43:04. > :43:04.

:43:04. > :43:11.Did somebody recognise Tim? That was the other guy. Australia's most

:43:11. > :43:20.wanted. I know that face. Quickly another one. Hello. What is your

:43:20. > :43:28.name. Diane from Hollywood. Jesus I can't. All right. If you want to

:43:28. > :43:37.have a go in the red chair, you can go to our web-site. Thank you to my