:00:08. > :00:13.language. Tonight, the star of The American
:00:13. > :00:18.Office. We have got some office workers in. He has also been in Date
:00:18. > :00:28.Night. I see we have got some people on a date. He also starred in The 40
:00:28. > :00:50.
:00:50. > :00:54.Year Old Virgin. Yes! Awkward. Let's Oh, oh, oh, hello everybody! We have
:00:54. > :01:02.got a great show for you tonight. The star of The American Office and
:01:02. > :01:11.The 40 Year Old Virgin, Steve Carell is here. Star of ride mates, Kristen
:01:11. > :01:21.Wiig is on the show. -- Bridesmaids. Chris O'Dowd is joining us. Plus we
:01:21. > :01:24.
:01:24. > :01:33.have got music from Josh Groban. Very good. Kristen Wiig is here. She
:01:33. > :01:37.starred in Bridesmaids. Also in that film was Chris O'Dowd. Remember? She
:01:37. > :01:41.played a cake maker who fell in love with a policeman. In reality, if a
:01:41. > :01:50.policeman fell in love with a woman who made cakes, he wouldn't like
:01:50. > :01:53.this. Chris also had a hit with Moone Boy, all about a young boy
:01:53. > :01:58.growing up in rural Ireland. I know from experience that there is plenty
:01:58. > :02:06.for a young boy to do in Ireland. Sports, culture even an adventure.
:02:06. > :02:11.So many sections of the library you can sit in. I'd joke. The library
:02:11. > :02:17.has been close. I look forward to chatting to Steve Carell. Despicable
:02:17. > :02:27.Me, The 40 Year Old Virgin, so many films. They are planning on a remake
:02:27. > :02:28.
:02:28. > :02:33.called The 80 Year Old Virgin. Come on! It is no wonder he is a virgin,
:02:33. > :02:40.just like that. What idiot thinks a pink suit is going to get him some
:02:40. > :02:45.action? Steve will soon be filming the second Anchorman. We all loved
:02:45. > :02:55.him in the first one. He played a useless were -- weatherman. I think
:02:55. > :02:56.
:02:56. > :03:05.he was based on this man. He is good in that film, but not the funniest
:03:05. > :03:11.weatherman I have seen. Let's get the guests on! Later we will have
:03:11. > :03:21.use it from Josh Groban. First, Irish eyes are smiling, it is Mr
:03:21. > :03:22.
:03:22. > :03:32.Chris O'Dowd! They love you, they love you.
:03:32. > :03:32.
:03:32. > :03:42.Keep your hair on, it is Kristen Wiig! Beautiful. Hello, my darling.
:03:42. > :03:54.
:03:54. > :04:04.And it is Steve Carell! Hello, sir. lovely. You all know each other.
:04:04. > :04:08.
:04:08. > :04:13.yes. We know each other! You were in a film together. You
:04:13. > :04:17.were in Despicable Me, where you play a super villain. Everybody who
:04:17. > :04:27.has talked about you just as you are the nicest, kindest man in all of
:04:27. > :04:28.
:04:28. > :04:34.Hollywood. Yes, that is true.And beautifully modest, too. So you are
:04:34. > :04:41.a really nice but Hugh attracts niceness. I can't believe... The
:04:41. > :04:46.first time you can to London? in 1984. We got off the plane and we
:04:46. > :04:53.had no idea where to go. We had no transportation. A guy come out of
:04:53. > :04:57.nowhere, came unto us and said, would you go ride into London? The
:04:57. > :05:02.trusting souls we were, we hitched a ride with this guy. He had just got
:05:02. > :05:09.off a friend. He said, would you like a tour of London? Absolutely.
:05:09. > :05:14.Want to go to lunch? I know a place. We went to his club, had a delicious
:05:14. > :05:21.lunch. Need a place to stay? I know a great bed and breakfast. He was
:05:21. > :05:26.the nicest guy in the world and he did not murder us at the end of it.
:05:26. > :05:33.And this was London, England? It is not a city we recognise from that
:05:33. > :05:42.story. Incredible. I love it here. Only good experiences... Until
:05:42. > :05:48.tonight. Kristen, your parents, they still
:05:48. > :05:52.don't quite believe you are doing OK. They make comments sometime. I
:05:52. > :06:01.will do a film and they say, that is so great, is it going to be in the
:06:01. > :06:07.theatre? Sometimes they don't quite understand that I have a job.
:06:07. > :06:13.are just worried about the quality of their retirement home. By then a
:06:13. > :06:19.house. Then they like, OK, that works for us. An enormous house they
:06:19. > :06:29.can't afford. It is like that show, where they leave them with all of
:06:29. > :06:30.
:06:30. > :06:39.the stuff. Like, who is going to pay the electricity bill? A giant
:06:39. > :06:49.glowing beaver. They never do a follow-up show on that, do they?
:06:49. > :06:55.they build it in one night, so you know it is quality. We poured the
:06:55. > :06:58.concrete. We think it is set. you are famous, you have to worry
:06:58. > :07:06.when you leave the house. Chris O'Dowd, you are very dapper. Have
:07:06. > :07:11.you consciously decided to become more dapper? It is weird. You start
:07:11. > :07:19.going to a lot more events when things are going well. It took me a
:07:19. > :07:25.while to determine what my look would be. You know? Oh, yes. I
:07:25. > :07:30.thought I would go for dishevelled for a while. At because I am
:07:30. > :07:40.dishevelled I looked like a tramp who had just stolen some clothes. I
:07:40. > :07:42.
:07:42. > :07:45.thought I would try the madmen look. What was that? It was sharp, but it
:07:45. > :07:49.did not look good. One night I was watching the show and I realised I
:07:49. > :07:59.was wearing the same outfit as one of the characters. I thought that
:07:59. > :08:12.
:08:12. > :08:16.was pretty great. I took a picture opens on June 28. You are back as
:08:16. > :08:25.the same character. But at the end of the last movie, you stopped being
:08:25. > :08:31.a villain. Yes, he has a family now. He has two retire and go legitimate.
:08:31. > :08:40.Now he has a line of jams and jellies. He really does. Have you
:08:40. > :08:45.guys watched it? Yes.There were children their first I laughed more
:08:45. > :08:51.than anybody. I had a lot of medication that day. I had a collar
:08:51. > :09:00.loss could be that day and they said I'd could not operate heavy
:09:00. > :09:09.machinery. But I laughed like a drain. The same day you saw the
:09:09. > :09:19.movie? That is good, because that is really your key demographic. It was
:09:19. > :09:23.
:09:23. > :09:32.a special deal, wasn't it? Don't eat the popcorn hour. -- now
:09:32. > :09:35.stop this time around he has been turned into a superhero, in a way.
:09:35. > :09:40.He has been recruited by the anti-villain league, an organisation
:09:40. > :09:47.that Kristin 's character is one of the Leeds buyers and she recruits my
:09:47. > :09:57.character to be the villain in residence. -- the head spies.
:09:57. > :09:58.
:09:58. > :10:06.are dramatically... There is a connection. Chemistry. Oh, for a
:10:06. > :10:16.family movie, it is hot. That is how we are selling it.
:10:16. > :10:16.
:10:16. > :10:23.Something for dad. This is your character, Lucy, and you have gone
:10:23. > :10:30.undercover in a maul. This is the two of you. Do I need to explain any
:10:30. > :10:36.more? That is basically it. We are trying to find the fluid that is
:10:36. > :10:46.turning things into herbal versions of themselves. -- horrible versions
:10:46. > :11:13.
:11:13. > :11:21.got a little... Here, I will get it. Oh, it is just spreading. All right,
:11:21. > :11:31.I got it. Stop it! What you just saw was something new I have been
:11:31. > :11:34.
:11:34. > :11:44.working odd. -- working on. Why are you here? On assignment. I am your
:11:44. > :11:50.
:11:50. > :12:00.new partner. What's? No! Were you doing all that? All of the
:12:00. > :12:00.
:12:00. > :12:08.moves, exactly like that. Sometimes it is just hard to stop. I find it
:12:08. > :12:13.hard not to dance. We have got to talk about the millions. They are
:12:13. > :12:17.brilliant. There are thousands of them now and they are following us
:12:17. > :12:22.through this press junket. Everywhere, people are just as
:12:22. > :12:28.minions. They are in the hallway. They are just walking around. They
:12:28. > :12:33.are always in character. People are in costumes, jumping around,
:12:33. > :12:40.constantly. It is the creepiest thing. I hope they have been hired
:12:40. > :12:50.by somebody. They could just be really keen fans. Kids who are fans
:12:50. > :13:00.of millions -- minions, this will sell so well. Imagine getting this
:13:00. > :13:01.
:13:01. > :13:08.for a child. Have you seen this? They have put out a Fat done. --
:13:08. > :13:18.fart gun. Are some of them a little stretched
:13:18. > :13:21.
:13:21. > :13:31.out? What about the one that you forget about and it sneaks out?
:13:31. > :13:35.
:13:35. > :13:45.I? In a little while. Not now. You can put a timer on it. In a minute,
:13:45. > :13:47.
:13:47. > :13:51.it will go off. I swear to God. There you are. Now you can have it.
:13:51. > :13:58.Oh, my God! Dawn is going to love this!
:13:58. > :14:08.That was the end of the show! 40 minutes of Chris O'Dowd doing a
:14:08. > :14:10.
:14:10. > :14:17.part gun! -- fart gun.
:14:17. > :14:22.If it landed here you would go, oh, get it over here. The fly feels the
:14:22. > :14:30.pressure of the air coming from either side, so you trick it! And
:14:30. > :14:40.you go... And you get it every time. Clever murder!
:14:40. > :14:41.
:14:41. > :14:48.So in character! That fly has November idea of the
:14:48. > :14:53.danger he's -- has no idea of the danger he's in now. I did it during
:14:54. > :15:02.a take of The Office, there was a fly on the desk and I went... And
:15:02. > :15:12.the cameras went down like, "Oh, my God! " It was the coolest thing I
:15:12. > :15:18.
:15:18. > :15:28.did on the show! I must mention Anchorman 2, you are all in that
:15:28. > :15:33.
:15:33. > :15:43.too. There is Steve down the end! He said, "Look upset that they gave
:15:43. > :15:44.
:15:44. > :15:52.you a perm! " Now, you play Brick's love interest?
:15:52. > :15:57.Another connection. Sparks a flying! I don't know how I
:15:57. > :16:03.feel about the perm. If you are getting married, don't go with that
:16:03. > :16:06.hair! During those scenes there was a
:16:06. > :16:11.level of attraction to that character. I thought she was just
:16:11. > :16:16.sort of weirdly hot as that character. Yeah?Why is everyone
:16:16. > :16:21.getting quiet? It's a little awkward. Calling
:16:21. > :16:28.something weirdly hot when they are right there is rather odd. She's not
:16:28. > :16:36.weirdly hot, she's hot! That's what I'm saying. Get a room!
:16:36. > :16:46.Give me a break! Oh, my God... Did you just drink the
:16:46. > :16:51.fly? Have you got it alive in your mouth?
:16:51. > :17:01.Oh, my sweet God! LAUGHTER
:17:01. > :17:06.
:17:06. > :17:16.Here we go. I'm taking this thing down. It's drunk now. I've chewed
:17:16. > :17:20.
:17:20. > :17:30.I took a drink. I was like, I didn't realise I had any ice in there!
:17:30. > :17:43.
:17:43. > :17:53.That was in your mouth! LAUGHTER
:17:53. > :17:57.
:17:57. > :18:03.It is like CSI Fly! Draw a chalk outline around it.
:18:03. > :18:11.I can't believe that worked! That was a one in a million shot.
:18:11. > :18:19.Everyone said, "It's too ambitious, don't try it! " Surprising! I am not
:18:19. > :18:29.going to lie, that was surprising! You didn't swallow any of it - it is
:18:29. > :18:36.
:18:36. > :18:41.still there. That is right - the good girl.
:18:41. > :18:48.Mo -- moving on! I'm doing this. I am hosting a chat show. We're going
:18:48. > :18:53.for it! Chris O'Dowd, he's back on our screens with this, it is very
:18:53. > :19:02.posh - Family Tree, on BBC Two from the middle of next month and it is
:19:02. > :19:07.Chris fer Guest who did Spinal Tap and other things. It is a
:19:07. > :19:13.mockumentary, is that what you call them? It is an improvised show.
:19:13. > :19:22.There is no dialogue. We make it up a little bit as we go along. It is a
:19:22. > :19:30.comedy version of Who Do You Think You Are. A parody. A guy is left by
:19:30. > :19:38.his woman. He loses his job. He is left a great trunk of stuff by a
:19:38. > :19:42.great aunt who dies. A good aunt. And so he starts dwefling into his
:19:42. > :19:47.past and looking into his family roots and all that stuff and meets
:19:47. > :19:57.interesting people. We have a clip of the show. This is you. You are
:19:57. > :20:07.taking a photograph of a great grandfather? Yes, probably so. I
:20:07. > :20:09.
:20:09. > :20:14.live upstairs from a guy who owns a ye Oldie Curious it isty shop.
:20:14. > :20:21.My great aunt died. She left me bits My great aunt died. She left me bits
:20:21. > :20:28.and bobs. I thought I know a man And this was in it.
:20:28. > :20:37.My great grandfather. Bliemly. He's a filler. I see the family
:20:37. > :20:42.resemblance. Puff your cheeks out a bit, now your eyes.
:20:42. > :20:49.Not really. I can tell you this much - it is turn of the century, I would
:20:49. > :20:55.say. Anywhere in the early 1900s. I would not do that. It is not a
:20:55. > :21:04.musical instrument, it is a Victorian dildo. I could say we
:21:04. > :21:14.don't know where it's been, but we know exactly where it's been!
:21:14. > :21:14.
:21:14. > :21:19.Have you done the real Who Do You Think You Are. How was it?I did it
:21:19. > :21:23.for my mother. They really want you to cry. They say things like, a lot
:21:24. > :21:28.of people find this process upsetting. I was like, at what point
:21:29. > :21:36.would you have cried during this so far? It has been in America. Do you
:21:37. > :21:42.have it in America? Yes.I I did look into my past. There would be
:21:42. > :21:51.November reason. I look back to the 1700s and found the first O'Dowds
:21:51. > :21:56.and they are 15 minutes from where we live now. So, not big travellers.
:21:56. > :22:03.Real seasick group, essentially. Since you were last here Chris
:22:03. > :22:07.O'Dowd, Chris has got married. A lovely marriage has taken place.
:22:07. > :22:11.APPLAUSE We have a picture of you and Dawn.
:22:11. > :22:17.I'm on the left! There is all that pressure, because
:22:17. > :22:24.it is supposed to be the perfect day. Did you get to enjoy it at all?
:22:24. > :22:30.Yeah. We really had a fantastic time. I feel like if I had one
:22:30. > :22:35.regret I wish I had drank a little less. With all the adrenaline and
:22:35. > :22:41.thaw stuff I don't remember -- and all that stuff I don't remember much
:22:41. > :22:46.after 1am, in the morning, in the night and... Right after the
:22:46. > :22:52.ceremony - it's gone! And we were talking the next morning and Dawn,
:22:52. > :23:00.we were kind of postmorteming the whole thing. It was like, we had a
:23:00. > :23:06.great time. I was like, "I wasn't too drunk was I? I didn't dance on
:23:06. > :23:12.tables? " She was like, "No, you were great. I was surprised you wore
:23:13. > :23:19.the crown for so long! " I had no recollection. I was like no I
:23:19. > :23:29.wasn't. She said, no, no, here's the picture of you! And ultimately we
:23:29. > :23:32.
:23:32. > :23:42.have the picture. You brought in the I have to say, Dawn looks awful in
:23:42. > :23:48.
:23:48. > :23:53.Is that your cat? It's head is slightly melted here. I have been
:23:53. > :23:58.sucking the shit out of it that all night. That is my best man and I
:23:58. > :24:07.don't know where the crown came from! That face is brilliant. That
:24:07. > :24:14.is just such a fabulous drunk face. Just so happy. You did Bridesmaids
:24:14. > :24:23.before getting married. Yes.Did that scare you? I have always found
:24:23. > :24:30.women terrifying, so I wasn't so much worried about all of that. Like
:24:30. > :24:39.nobody can ever ask you to be a bridesmaid. Is that tricky? I guess.
:24:39. > :24:47.No-one has asked me since I have made it. The thing is, so
:24:47. > :24:50.Bridesmaids you wrote it. It was the first thing you ever wrote. Yes, I
:24:50. > :24:54.had written little sketches and stuff.
:24:54. > :25:01.APPLAUSE It was amazing. But it is that thing
:25:01. > :25:07.with first novels, that sort of thing, people tend to steal great
:25:07. > :25:15.chunks of your own life. Are there big bits... ? Not as much as you
:25:15. > :25:21.would think. I had never lost control of my bowels!
:25:21. > :25:27.What if that was the only thing that was true and we wrote the whole
:25:27. > :25:34.movie around it? I mean, honestly not that much, really! Where did
:25:34. > :25:37.that come from? That is one of the funniest scenes of all time.
:25:38. > :25:41.Actually I remember when we were writing that scene, my writing
:25:41. > :25:46.partner actually acted out that part. She was walking and she was
:25:46. > :25:55.like, what if she went down on the ground. It was like, yes, we have to
:25:55. > :26:02.put that in there! Is it like Holly Hunter and the Piano? Exactly like
:26:02. > :26:06.that. You had a similar experience where you wrote a script and you
:26:06. > :26:13.wrote 40 Year Old Virgin. I co-wrote that. You choose to write this scene
:26:13. > :26:18.for yourself, which was a form of self-loathing and... Yes, I thought
:26:18. > :26:22.it would be funny. And it is very funny. I thought it would be funny
:26:23. > :26:27.for the guys watching it in the scene. There's no way you can act
:26:27. > :26:35.the horror that you are witnessing and the joy of watching a man go
:26:35. > :26:42.through something like that. And at one point Romney has to leave the
:26:42. > :26:49.scene because he is so grossed out... For real, he has to leave!
:26:49. > :26:56.That actress, I love her face there! Is it true she lied in the audition.
:26:56. > :27:04.She said she knew how to wax! that true? I think she was told they
:27:04. > :27:08.needed someone to wax a chest. She said she was proficient at it. It
:27:08. > :27:12.turns out she tried once to wax her boyfriend's wax. That didn't go well
:27:12. > :27:18.either. There was a point, you put the wax on, but when you wax around
:27:18. > :27:27.the nipples you are supposed to put a little Vaseline so the nipple
:27:27. > :27:32.doesn't... . Very good reaction!You know where I am going with that. -
:27:32. > :27:38.it will rip your nipple off. She did not put the Vaseline on my nipple.
:27:38. > :27:42.She reached down. Someone had the forethought to say, hang on. It was
:27:42. > :27:47.the only time we cut and said, you have to do that before you do that.
:27:47. > :27:57.So, I still have two functioning nipples!
:27:57. > :28:00.
:28:00. > :28:08.Phew! We're so happy! That actress is not the only person who relied in
:28:08. > :28:12.audition. Chris O'Dowd. Everybody does this. For whatever reason,
:28:12. > :28:22.actors don't drive. They are really bad at learning to drive. In this
:28:22. > :28:23.
:28:23. > :28:31.country. I just don't need to. So, yes, I took a job where I told them
:28:31. > :28:38.I could drive but the job was I was the getaway driver. So they just
:28:38. > :28:45.shot it from behind and got somebody else to do it. Kristen, didn't you
:28:45. > :28:50.say you were a professional dancer or something? I didn't say I was
:28:50. > :29:00.professional. At the bottom of your CV, often it says, special skills.
:29:00. > :29:00.
:29:00. > :29:10.So I said, I dance, I kayak. My commercial agent at the time called
:29:10. > :29:11.
:29:11. > :29:20.me and said, can you dance? I was like, yes, I can dance. I said, yes.
:29:20. > :29:30.She said, where your clothes, go to this audition. So I put sweats on
:29:30. > :29:31.
:29:31. > :29:36.and I go in and women are fully like leotards, buns, stretching. I was
:29:36. > :29:45.trying to stretch with everybody and thinking, what is going to happen? I
:29:45. > :29:49.go in the room and they are already looking at me. The direction was to
:29:49. > :29:59.start on the ground. They wanted people to rise up like they were
:29:59. > :30:01.
:30:01. > :30:10.flames. So I was like... I crouched on the ground and I just... I just
:30:10. > :30:18.did like a turn. Then I just stopped. I stared at them and they
:30:18. > :30:28.were like... Thank you. It was so humiliating. They seemed genuinely
:30:28. > :30:32.
:30:32. > :30:40.mad. It was awful. I would have paid �1000 to see that. And here it is.
:30:41. > :30:50.Steve, you have had a share when you were a struggling actor - didn't you
:30:51. > :30:54.
:30:54. > :31:03.sell wine on the phone? Yes. I knew very little about wine. I would
:31:03. > :31:08.say, the vital characteristics of this wine are, you know, whatever,
:31:08. > :31:17.it strong afterbirth. I never sold a bottle of wine. I only worked there
:31:17. > :31:25.for one day. Who buys wine over the phone? You go to the store and buy
:31:25. > :31:34.wine. Some guy cold calls you and says, would you like to buy some
:31:34. > :31:44.wine? You would want him to arrive immediately. Exactly. Where are
:31:44. > :31:47.
:31:47. > :31:56.you? Ding dong, here is your wine. Chris, you worked for a charity.
:31:56. > :32:04.worked in a charity call centre, an animal charity. You would call
:32:04. > :32:09.people... We would call people who already had a direct debit, and ask
:32:09. > :32:13.them to increase it. My campaign was endangered species. You would tell
:32:13. > :32:20.them about the endangered species. More often than not, the species was
:32:20. > :32:30.able that. Everybody is like, great, they are dying out. Nobody gives a
:32:30. > :32:45.
:32:45. > :32:53.have to make up animals. So for like a month there was people across
:32:53. > :33:02.England terrified about the disappearance of the tiger swan. It
:33:02. > :33:12.was just a normal swan but with the stripes of a Bangor. -- Bengal
:33:12. > :33:18.
:33:18. > :33:24.tiger. They would say, I have not heard of it. Well, it is rare. We
:33:24. > :33:33.raised �300,000 on that campaign. But I did get fired.
:33:33. > :33:37.APPLAUSE. It is music time. Performing I
:33:37. > :33:47.Believe When I Fall In Love It Will Be Forever, please welcome the
:33:47. > :33:52.
:33:52. > :34:02.# Worthless years. # Here am I encased inside a hollow
:34:02. > :34:05.
:34:05. > :34:13.shell. # Life began, then was done.
:34:13. > :34:17.# Now I stare into a cold and empty well.
:34:17. > :34:24.# The many sounds that meet our ears.
:34:24. > :34:33.# The sights our eyes behold. # Will open up our merging hearts.
:34:33. > :34:39.# And feed our empty souls. # I believe when I fall in love with
:34:39. > :34:43.you. # It will be forever.
:34:43. > :34:53.# I believe when I fall in love this time.
:34:53. > :35:03.
:35:03. > :35:13.# Without despair, we will share. # And the joys of caring will not be
:35:13. > :35:16.
:35:16. > :35:25.replaced. # What has been must never end.
:35:25. > :35:28.# And with the strength we have won't be erased.
:35:28. > :35:35.# The truths of love are planted firm.
:35:35. > :35:42.# They won't be hard to find. # And the words of love I speak to
:35:42. > :35:47.you. # Will echo in your mind.
:35:47. > :35:51.# Because I believe. # When I fall in love with you.
:35:52. > :35:58.# It will be forever. # Oh, I believe.
:35:58. > :36:02.# When I fall in love this time. # It will be forever.
:36:02. > :36:12.# I believe when I fall in love this time.
:36:12. > :36:15.
:36:15. > :36:18.# I believe. # When I fall in love.
:36:18. > :36:22.# It will be forever. # You know that love will call.
:36:22. > :36:24.# I believe. # I believe it will be forever.
:36:24. > :36:29.# If I believe. # I believe.
:36:30. > :36:39.# You're the only one for me. # I believe.
:36:40. > :37:17.
:37:17. > :37:27.# When I fall. Josh Groban, everybody! Come and
:37:27. > :37:29.
:37:29. > :37:37.join us. Good to see you. Hello again, nice to see you. Keep your
:37:37. > :37:47.applause going for the choir. Fantastic. Beautiful. Oh, my. That
:37:47. > :37:53.looks delicious. Not an egg thrower among them.
:37:53. > :37:58.is the greatest couch in the history of mankind. I love you guys.
:37:58. > :38:08.agree. Let's do some business. That is from
:38:08. > :38:14.your carbon, All That Echoes, which is in the shops now. -- your album.
:38:14. > :38:21.You can buy that. By the way, if you are watching and gloves go tonight,
:38:21. > :38:31.when your wife said she was going to a Josh Groban concert, she was not
:38:31. > :38:34.
:38:34. > :38:44.lying. -- watching in Glasgow. Sunday, you are in Dublin. We are
:38:44. > :38:44.
:38:44. > :38:49.finishing the European tour in Dublin. Are you going? Yes.I feel
:38:49. > :38:59.like you could be my brother from another mother. When I grow a beard
:38:59. > :38:59.
:38:59. > :39:03.I get that all the time. We should coordinate. Just a freak people out.
:39:03. > :39:13.We said it was a connected couch. You and Steve or in a movie
:39:13. > :39:23.together. We were. He and his team were kind enough to include me.
:39:23. > :39:25.
:39:25. > :39:33.you played a douche bag. I really nailed the audition. Did you have to
:39:33. > :39:43.audition? It was a formality. The other link you have, we were
:39:43. > :39:44.
:39:44. > :39:53.talking about waxing, and you are really hairy. Oh, wow. Do we have
:39:53. > :40:03.that in common, to? It is all on the back. It is funny for the joke, but
:40:03. > :40:04.
:40:04. > :40:14.I don't, really. I have a very smooth... You are protesting too
:40:14. > :40:20.much. I have a circle here.I know an actress who can help you out with
:40:20. > :40:27.the rest of it. Now she is experienced. Now she knows what she
:40:27. > :40:34.is doing. Do you do manscaping? Occasionally. The odd trim here and
:40:34. > :40:44.there. I would never do the full body thing. I want to stay
:40:44. > :40:46.
:40:46. > :40:52.lumberjack. What about lady gardening, as they call it? No?
:40:52. > :41:02.have never heard it as lady gardening, but I like that. Ladies
:41:02. > :41:03.
:41:03. > :41:13.of the choir? Yes? The woman I am with, it is lady Forrest Inc. It
:41:13. > :41:15.
:41:15. > :41:22.depends if it is pre-or post not chill. -- pre-or post-wedding.
:41:22. > :41:32.Before we go, time for a story or two in the Red Chair. Who is up
:41:32. > :41:33.
:41:33. > :41:43.first? Oh, no. Seriously? Seriously? OK, next one. Hello! Did
:41:43. > :41:53.I meet you outside earlier? Don't think so. I think you would
:41:53. > :41:59.remember. My name is in this show title. Who are you going to see? I
:41:59. > :42:07.don't know. I just saw a queue. I don't own a television. What is your
:42:07. > :42:17.name? Paula. From Islington. I'm a manager of a sheltered
:42:17. > :42:18.
:42:18. > :42:22.accommodation. You do good work. Years ago, my husband was lazy. He
:42:22. > :42:27.joined a Sunday football league team. He used to come home three
:42:27. > :42:34.sheets to the wind, sit on the sofa, where is my dinner? Then he would
:42:34. > :42:38.fall asleep. I thought, I have had enough. I made some gravy and I
:42:38. > :42:47.flicked it on his shirt. He would wake up and say where is my dinner?
:42:48. > :42:52.I would say, you have had it. Look. He used to come home in the summer,
:42:53. > :42:56.strip off to his boxers and fall asleep on the settee. I couldn't do
:42:56. > :43:01.the gravy thing any more. I was hoovering one day, it was really
:43:01. > :43:06.hot, the kids were screaming, it was manic, and I thought, oh, I am so
:43:06. > :43:12.fed up, and as I looked around, he had the ox shorts with the buttons
:43:12. > :43:18.and his little chap was poking out. My son said, take the part of the
:43:18. > :43:24.Hoover. I pulled his pants aside, I thought, oh, no, don't do it, and
:43:24. > :43:30.before I could get away, I just lifted up and it went... I run into
:43:30. > :43:38.the bathroom and all I could think to say was, it is the best blow job
:43:38. > :43:46.you will ever have. You walk! Best story ever! Even the choir are
:43:46. > :43:51.applauding Paula. Well done everyone. You can contact us via the
:43:51. > :44:01.website at this address. Thank you to my fabulous guest tonight. Josh