0:00:01 > 0:00:03- Good evening, I'm Goldie Hawn! - And I'm Amy Schumer!
0:00:03 > 0:00:06- BOTH:- Welcome to The Graham Norton Show!
0:00:06 > 0:00:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:23 > 0:00:24APPLAUSE Oh!
0:00:24 > 0:00:26Oh... Yes!
0:00:26 > 0:00:28WHISTLING Oh, yeah!
0:00:29 > 0:00:31Yes!
0:00:31 > 0:00:32Oh!
0:00:32 > 0:00:34Thank you very much. Thank you.
0:00:34 > 0:00:38Thank you very much. Hello, good evening, you're very welcome.
0:00:38 > 0:00:39Great show tonight.
0:00:39 > 0:00:42Yes, Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn are going to be on that sofa!
0:00:42 > 0:00:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Woohoo!
0:00:44 > 0:00:46Excellent. Sitting alongside them,
0:00:46 > 0:00:48we've got pirate of the Caribbean Orlando Bloom...
0:00:48 > 0:00:50APPLAUSE
0:00:50 > 0:00:53And from Star Wars, it's only John Boyega, ladies and gentlemen.
0:00:53 > 0:00:54CHEERING
0:00:54 > 0:00:56Good, right? Yeah.
0:00:56 > 0:00:59Woohoo! They're excited now. Hey!
0:00:59 > 0:01:03Only six weeks to go till the election. Can you believe it?
0:01:03 > 0:01:05It's really flying by, isn't it?
0:01:05 > 0:01:07LAUGHTER
0:01:07 > 0:01:10On Wednesday, Theresa May held her last Prime Minister's Questions.
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Well, for the time being.
0:01:12 > 0:01:16Er... Theresa said she was a strong and stable leader of
0:01:16 > 0:01:19a strong and stable party, who would fight a strong and stable...
0:01:19 > 0:01:22We get it, "strong and stable". There's a new drinking game,
0:01:22 > 0:01:24every time she says "strong and stable",
0:01:24 > 0:01:25you take a sip of your drink.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28Here's someone after Prime Minister's Questions.
0:01:28 > 0:01:31LAUGHTER
0:01:31 > 0:01:33Good game, good game.
0:01:33 > 0:01:36Meanwhile, Lib Dem leader Tim Farron is very happy with how things
0:01:36 > 0:01:38have been going lately.
0:01:38 > 0:01:39LAUGHTER
0:01:39 > 0:01:42That is Tim Farron, just in case. Er...
0:01:42 > 0:01:46Do you know what? He could do well in the election because,
0:01:46 > 0:01:49you know, he's got those film star looks, hasn't he?
0:01:49 > 0:01:51LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:01:51 > 0:01:54Backing policies on gay sex, Tim. Er...
0:01:55 > 0:01:58Yes, for seven days, Tim refused to answer the question,
0:01:58 > 0:02:00is gay sex a sin? Mm-hm.
0:02:00 > 0:02:02According to his spokesman,
0:02:02 > 0:02:05it took Tim a week to find a position he was comfortable with.
0:02:05 > 0:02:07LAUGHTER
0:02:07 > 0:02:11We've all been there, Tim. We've all been there.
0:02:11 > 0:02:13Hey! Mon Dieu!
0:02:13 > 0:02:17Election fever has hit France, as well. Yeah.
0:02:17 > 0:02:20We're into our election, I was talking about the French one.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22The French elections, come on, they've got everything,
0:02:22 > 0:02:25excitement, forbidden love affairs, good-looking people.
0:02:25 > 0:02:28Oh, and Marine Le Pen's in it, as well.
0:02:28 > 0:02:30Marine Le Pen.
0:02:30 > 0:02:33That's a woman, not one of those biros that writes underwater.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35LAUGHTER
0:02:38 > 0:02:40Marine Le Pen!
0:02:40 > 0:02:43Write it down, it's yours. LAUGHTER
0:02:43 > 0:02:46The favourite to win, ladies and gentlemen, is Emmanuel Macron.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49He's 39, his wife Brigitte is 64
0:02:49 > 0:02:52and used to be his high school teacher.
0:02:52 > 0:02:54I mean, it couldn't be more French, could it?
0:02:54 > 0:02:56The whole thing smells of cheese. LAUGHTER
0:02:56 > 0:02:59It's fantastic he's with an older woman.
0:02:59 > 0:03:01Could you imagine Donald Trump doing that?
0:03:01 > 0:03:03He's never even met a woman in her 60s.
0:03:03 > 0:03:05No, I'm lying, ladies and gentlemen.
0:03:05 > 0:03:08He has met one - and he absolutely loved it.
0:03:08 > 0:03:11Oh... LAUGHTER
0:03:11 > 0:03:13So comfortable.
0:03:13 > 0:03:16"I can't look at you, you're too old."
0:03:16 > 0:03:18LAUGHTER
0:03:18 > 0:03:20And by the way, congratulations to Donald
0:03:20 > 0:03:23on reaching his first 100 days in power.
0:03:23 > 0:03:26I wonder how many of those policies for making America great
0:03:26 > 0:03:27he's actually achieved.
0:03:27 > 0:03:29LAUGHTER Yeah, that's right.
0:03:29 > 0:03:31Let's get some guests on!
0:03:31 > 0:03:33CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:03:33 > 0:03:37Later, there'll be some flag-waving as we hear the UK's entry
0:03:37 > 0:03:40for this year's Eurovision Song Contest. Lucie Jones, everybody.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42WHOOPING Yeah. Cheer her.
0:03:42 > 0:03:46But first, he's the Peckham boy, became a global superstar
0:03:46 > 0:03:48as Finn in Star Wars: The Force Awakens.
0:03:48 > 0:03:51Now he takes to the stage in Woyzeck at the Old Vic.
0:03:51 > 0:03:53It's John Boyega!
0:03:53 > 0:03:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Whoo!
0:03:55 > 0:03:57Hello! Yeah...
0:03:57 > 0:04:00- This way...- Good to see you again.- Really good to see you.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02- Thank you.- That's John Boyega.
0:04:02 > 0:04:05He's in Star Wars! Yeah!
0:04:05 > 0:04:08He's thrilled us as Legolas in Lord of the Rings
0:04:08 > 0:04:10and Will Turner in Pirates of the Caribbean.
0:04:10 > 0:04:13Now he's starring in action movie Unlocked.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15Please welcome Orlando Bloom!
0:04:15 > 0:04:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:04:16 > 0:04:18Oh!
0:04:18 > 0:04:19So good to see you.
0:04:19 > 0:04:21Have a seat, do!
0:04:21 > 0:04:23- Good to see you.- Whoo!
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Now, these two women represent the very best of comedy.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30One is the breakout star of Trainwreck,
0:04:30 > 0:04:32the other is the Oscar-winning star of Private Benjamin
0:04:32 > 0:04:35and The First Wives Club - and a true Hollywood trailblazer.
0:04:35 > 0:04:37Now they're together in the new comedy Snatched.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40Please welcome Amy Schumer and Goldie Hawn!
0:04:40 > 0:04:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Oh!
0:04:43 > 0:04:44Whoo!
0:04:44 > 0:04:46Beautifully done! Beautifully done!
0:04:46 > 0:04:48Hello!
0:04:48 > 0:04:50Lovely to see you. Hello, darling.
0:04:50 > 0:04:53- Mwah, mwah!- Kiss the others, kiss the others.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55Kiss him, kiss him.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58- Good to see you. Mwah. Mwah. - Lovely.
0:04:58 > 0:05:00Aw...
0:05:00 > 0:05:02LAUGHTER AND WHISTLING
0:05:02 > 0:05:06- All right.- Oh, sorry. OK.- Oh, yeah. More. Mwah...- Oh, it's so...
0:05:06 > 0:05:09- Oh, it's so fun!- Isn't this fun?
0:05:09 > 0:05:11- I'm being rude, I'm being rude. - Oh, look.
0:05:11 > 0:05:13- We get to drink everything. - THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER
0:05:13 > 0:05:16- Cheers, to you, the audience. - Cheers.- Cheers.
0:05:16 > 0:05:17- Cheers, all.- Cheers.- Cheers.- Cheers.
0:05:17 > 0:05:19Whoo! Whoo!
0:05:19 > 0:05:21- Graham...- Oh, I'm wined.
0:05:21 > 0:05:24- Are you wined, darling?- Yeah, yeah.
0:05:24 > 0:05:27- This wine is so good, by the way, thank you.- Thank you very much.
0:05:27 > 0:05:30- Mmm.- Is it...white?- Yeah.- Oh... - LAUGHTER
0:05:32 > 0:05:34This is, er...
0:05:34 > 0:05:37- White.- That's... - That's also white.- Yeah.
0:05:37 > 0:05:39- Can we just thank you? - That's a dark white.
0:05:39 > 0:05:42We're having so much fun in London and I just like...
0:05:42 > 0:05:46- I just love the people here.- Yeah. - And we went, we went to...
0:05:46 > 0:05:49You can go to where they filmed the Harry Potter movies,
0:05:49 > 0:05:50- like you can see the sets.- Yeah.
0:05:50 > 0:05:54And did you know for just an extra 100, they let you...
0:05:54 > 0:05:56- BLEEP - ..Daniel Radcliffe?
0:05:56 > 0:05:59LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:06:01 > 0:06:03- Wow.- Can you believe it?
0:06:03 > 0:06:05- He's...- Oh, my God...
0:06:05 > 0:06:07He's so dedicated.
0:06:07 > 0:06:09He so, like wants to give you the experience, yeah.
0:06:09 > 0:06:11LAUGHTER
0:06:11 > 0:06:13Who knew? Who knew?
0:06:13 > 0:06:15One day that could be you, John, in Star Wars World.
0:06:15 > 0:06:17LAUGHTER
0:06:18 > 0:06:21But now, when we research guests - you know,
0:06:21 > 0:06:24I get briefing notes on the guests - I nearly fell off my chair
0:06:24 > 0:06:30when I read that John Boyega recently spent time in Orlando.
0:06:30 > 0:06:33LAUGHTER
0:06:33 > 0:06:34We had a great time.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40LAUGHTER DROWNS SPEECH
0:06:40 > 0:06:41How long were you there, John?
0:06:41 > 0:06:44Er, for about a second.
0:06:44 > 0:06:47Erm... No, it was great, I went out to Orlando
0:06:47 > 0:06:49for Star Wars Celebration.
0:06:49 > 0:06:52If you haven't heard about Star Wars, it's a film... Forget it.
0:06:52 > 0:06:55I went out there just to meet some fans and just to have a great
0:06:55 > 0:06:59time and I was just doing some photobombing, just to show myself.
0:06:59 > 0:07:01You say that like, you know, "I'm in Star Wars",
0:07:01 > 0:07:03is it still like the coolest thing in the world...?
0:07:03 > 0:07:05That's the only way I introduce myself.
0:07:05 > 0:07:06"Hi, I'm John Boyega, I'm in Star Wars."
0:07:06 > 0:07:08Just get straight to the point.
0:07:08 > 0:07:10You do have amazing things happen to you,
0:07:10 > 0:07:12like those pictures that were released of the set of Star Wars...
0:07:12 > 0:07:16- Oh, yes.- ..where William and Harry came, there they all are.
0:07:16 > 0:07:17That's Harry and William there.
0:07:17 > 0:07:21- Yes.- And we've got a picture of you chatting to..
0:07:21 > 0:07:22I think you're chatting to...
0:07:22 > 0:07:25What are you telling him? You look really animated.
0:07:25 > 0:07:26LAUGHTER
0:07:26 > 0:07:29Yeah, he's really tall, man. Bloody hell.
0:07:29 > 0:07:31He's like one of the people from your movies.
0:07:31 > 0:07:33- What are they? Orcs or something? - Yeah, exactly.
0:07:33 > 0:07:35You are really telling him something.
0:07:35 > 0:07:38- Yeah, I don't know what I was telling him...- I like, I like in the background,
0:07:38 > 0:07:40Harry and Chewbacca swapping ginger hair care...
0:07:40 > 0:07:43LAUGHTER ..ginger hair care tips.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46"Is yours really dry?" "Yeah, mine's very dry."
0:07:46 > 0:07:47LAUGHTER
0:07:47 > 0:07:49APPLAUSE
0:07:49 > 0:07:51Oh...
0:07:51 > 0:07:53Now, movies, movies, movies.
0:07:53 > 0:07:55Goldie and Amy, congratulations.
0:07:55 > 0:07:58You have made a funny film. I was saying this to you backstage,
0:07:58 > 0:08:01they're not easy to make - and you've made one.
0:08:01 > 0:08:04- It's really, really funny.- They're not that easy to make, actually.
0:08:04 > 0:08:07- No.- Yeah, so...- Otherwise, there'd be way more funny films.
0:08:07 > 0:08:09LAUGHTER
0:08:09 > 0:08:11I don't need an insult to get a compliment, but I'll take it.
0:08:11 > 0:08:13LAUGHTER
0:08:13 > 0:08:17No, you've made two, they're both very funny. May the 19th, it opens.
0:08:17 > 0:08:21It's called Snatched and it's, I suppose...
0:08:21 > 0:08:24- We hate that picture. - It's the worst picture.
0:08:24 > 0:08:26Yeah, we don't like that picture.
0:08:26 > 0:08:29- We took so many, many better pictures than that.- So many.
0:08:29 > 0:08:31What does that picture say?
0:08:31 > 0:08:34I mean, we were just voted People Magazine's runners up,
0:08:34 > 0:08:38- very far from the most beautiful people, but still...- Right...
0:08:38 > 0:08:40LAUGHTER
0:08:40 > 0:08:41And that picture doesn't represent us.
0:08:41 > 0:08:44LAUGHTER
0:08:44 > 0:08:47Have you heard of People Magazine Most Beautiful Person?
0:08:47 > 0:08:50- You must have been?- Were you? - Somewhere in there...
0:08:50 > 0:08:52- ORLANDO:- Me? No.- You weren't?- Oh. - ORLANDO:- Yes.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55No, voting on the... You'd be on the list. LAUGHTER
0:08:55 > 0:08:58- You've both been on the list. - Yeah, I think so, yeah.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02- Oh, my gosh.- You definitely were. - Can you put a word in for us?
0:09:02 > 0:09:05I think, didn't he...? Last time you were on or something?
0:09:05 > 0:09:08- Yeah, I was...- And you've been on Peoples everywhere.- No...
0:09:08 > 0:09:10He doesn't even remember...
0:09:10 > 0:09:11LAUGHTER
0:09:11 > 0:09:13Back to the film, Amy.
0:09:13 > 0:09:16- The film, I'm sorry.- Yes, your funny film that you did make.
0:09:16 > 0:09:18- Funny film.- So you play mother and daughter, tell us more about it.
0:09:18 > 0:09:21- I play the daughter. - I play the mother.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23LAUGHTER
0:09:23 > 0:09:25And no other spoilers... No.
0:09:25 > 0:09:31I suck at promoting movies, but, um... Yeah, we go on a...
0:09:31 > 0:09:35I've an exotic vacation plan with my boyfriend, he dumps me and no-one
0:09:35 > 0:09:36else will go with me, so I beg my mum to come,
0:09:36 > 0:09:38and she's afraid of everything,
0:09:38 > 0:09:41and everything happens that she's afraid of, basically.
0:09:41 > 0:09:43Yes, cos you travel to... South America.
0:09:43 > 0:09:45- You go to Ecuador, originally. - Yeah.- Yeah.- Ecuador.
0:09:45 > 0:09:48It's not going to do much for tourism in Ecuador, is it?
0:09:48 > 0:09:52No. No, and we're hoping to avoid that backlash.
0:09:52 > 0:09:54LAUGHTER
0:09:54 > 0:09:57Yeah, this is just... I mean, really, it's a movie where we vilify ourselves.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00It really shows the ugly Americans who have
0:10:00 > 0:10:01no other cultural knowledge.
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Yeah, we make fun of ourselves.
0:10:03 > 0:10:05Well, listen, we've got a clip.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09This is when you've been in a spot of bother, you've got out of
0:10:09 > 0:10:12a spot of bother and then you're trying to avoid a spot of bother.
0:10:12 > 0:10:15- Yeah, that is exactly it. - Yeah, this is it, this is it.
0:10:15 > 0:10:16This is it.
0:10:18 > 0:10:24- Hi.- Hi. When does the next bus leave?- Un autobus?
0:10:24 > 0:10:27- Bus doesn't leave for about 36 hours.- Oh, my God.
0:10:27 > 0:10:30But I know a man who can take care of you.
0:10:30 > 0:10:32Oh, yeah, no, I'm sure he could. Mm-hm, yeah.
0:10:32 > 0:10:36- This is how sex slavery starts, honey.- I'm so sorry.
0:10:36 > 0:10:38Listen, no, you don't have to worry about them.
0:10:38 > 0:10:41Those types of people want young, beautiful females. You're safe.
0:10:41 > 0:10:42Well, yeah.
0:10:42 > 0:10:46- That's good.- OK, how dare you? Like, that is so rude.
0:10:46 > 0:10:49- That's crazy.- Well, honey... - No, like, how dare you?
0:10:49 > 0:10:51- That's my mother. - Honey, have a peanut.- OK, fine.
0:10:51 > 0:10:54But if you think it would be safer for me to kind of like
0:10:54 > 0:10:57go hide and then she meets your friend, who knows how to...
0:10:57 > 0:10:59- No, I don't want you to do that. - No, you're both safe.
0:10:59 > 0:11:03- Really? - Your goofy face will protect you.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:11:10 > 0:11:12Who wrote that?
0:11:12 > 0:11:15Katie Dippold wrote the movie and then my sister and I rewrote it.
0:11:15 > 0:11:17- Oh, nice.- Goldie and I, yeah.
0:11:17 > 0:11:18Did you guys improvise a bit on set?
0:11:18 > 0:11:20That's honestly none of your business...
0:11:20 > 0:11:22LAUGHTER
0:11:22 > 0:11:25I feel pretty uncomfortable. Yeah, we knew we were doing...
0:11:25 > 0:11:28But we knew who we were, so we could play around, yeah.
0:11:28 > 0:11:30Did you improvise a lot on Star Wars?
0:11:30 > 0:11:31No, no, no.
0:11:31 > 0:11:34- I think that was your Bible, right?- Yeah, yeah.
0:11:34 > 0:11:37- Can't move off of that. - Can't move off of that.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39In the movie, you play mother and daughter and obviously
0:11:39 > 0:11:42you get on, but do you get on in a kind of fun mum-daughter way,
0:11:42 > 0:11:44or you're more like just regular friends?
0:11:44 > 0:11:48- In the movie?- No, in life. - In life? Yeah, we talked about that.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50I don't think it's...
0:11:50 > 0:11:53- I don't feel age difference.- Yeah. - But I do feel,
0:11:53 > 0:11:57many times I can feel like maternal, you know, which is normal.
0:11:57 > 0:12:01- Yeah.- And I think, I look at Amy and I watch her,
0:12:01 > 0:12:04she could've been my daughter.
0:12:04 > 0:12:05- Aw!- From your lips.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07LAUGHTER
0:12:07 > 0:12:09- Could have been my daughter! - Yeah, the love is real.
0:12:09 > 0:12:11Would have been a troubled daughter,
0:12:11 > 0:12:13it would have been someone I'd have had to deal with..
0:12:13 > 0:12:16LAUGHTER DROWNS OUT SPEECH
0:12:16 > 0:12:18- You could have made the grade, baby! - That is true.
0:12:19 > 0:12:22I would have loved to have come out of you. Can I say that?
0:12:24 > 0:12:26- Is that OK? - That is really good, yeah.
0:12:26 > 0:12:28- That's a lovely thing to say.- Yes!
0:12:28 > 0:12:33- I am all rosy for that one. - It would have been great.
0:12:33 > 0:12:35It would have been like...
0:12:35 > 0:12:36"There she is!"
0:12:36 > 0:12:39- That is the sequel!- Oh, my God!
0:12:39 > 0:12:41"It's a...it's a..."
0:12:41 > 0:12:44- "It is a Schumer!"- "It's a...girl!"
0:12:44 > 0:12:46Thank you, thank you.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51Oh, my God.
0:12:51 > 0:12:55- But you have hung out with Goldie's family, haven't you?- Yeah.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58Yeah. I have to tell you the other night about Kurt.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00So I go over to their house the other night for dinner,
0:13:00 > 0:13:03and Kurt answered the door and he was so sweet.
0:13:03 > 0:13:05He just gave me the warmest hello.
0:13:05 > 0:13:09He was like, "It is so great to finally meet you, I love you,
0:13:09 > 0:13:12"Goldie loves you, I love you." It was so warm.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14I was like, "Oh, my gosh, thank you, Kurt.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17"We sat next to each other at the Golden Globes."
0:13:17 > 0:13:19Um... He had no...
0:13:19 > 0:13:21"I went to the Golden Globes?!"
0:13:21 > 0:13:23I was like, "Oh, my God..."
0:13:23 > 0:13:27No-one in this family remembers meeting me.
0:13:27 > 0:13:30"You were in it, too, you know? You were part of it."
0:13:30 > 0:13:32He was a part of the show, yeah.
0:13:32 > 0:13:34But I love her family so much.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37And they let me sneak in and hang out.
0:13:37 > 0:13:38And we must congratulate you, Goldie,
0:13:38 > 0:13:43because recently you marked your 34 years with Kurt.
0:13:43 > 0:13:45- Kurt Russell and you, 34 years together.- I did. Yeah.
0:13:45 > 0:13:48- Oh, the audience... No! Too late! - APPLAUSE
0:13:48 > 0:13:50We're British.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55I have to say, it's good it's lasted, because
0:13:55 > 0:13:58one of the stories you have is you're not very good with break-ups.
0:13:58 > 0:14:00Was it your first-ever break-up?
0:14:00 > 0:14:04Yes, I was in love for the first time, and I was about 18.
0:14:05 > 0:14:10And he said to me, "I don't want to put a gate around you.
0:14:10 > 0:14:14"You have a big life." And I said...
0:14:14 > 0:14:17- CRYING:- "You're just a horse's ass.
0:14:17 > 0:14:18"How could you do this to me?"
0:14:18 > 0:14:20And he said, "You'll thank me."
0:14:20 > 0:14:25And I hung up the phone. And I decided to sculpt his head.
0:14:25 > 0:14:28LAUGHTER
0:14:28 > 0:14:31So I took my clay and a picture of him
0:14:31 > 0:14:33and I sculpted his head.
0:14:33 > 0:14:36And it looked just like him.
0:14:36 > 0:14:40I mean, honestly, I thought I might go to sculpting school.
0:14:41 > 0:14:45- Every cloud... - I had it on my mum's breadboard.
0:14:45 > 0:14:49And I carried it around with me in my car.
0:14:49 > 0:14:51And I sat there, and I had a little Volkswagen Bug.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53I had to be careful, you know,
0:14:53 > 0:14:57- when I was shifting to make sure it didn't fall over.- Yes!
0:14:57 > 0:15:01And basically, that was it. I used to carry him around with me.
0:15:01 > 0:15:03- That's fine!- And I showed him off.
0:15:04 > 0:15:08- You dealt with the break-up in your own way.- I did, I did.
0:15:08 > 0:15:10Eventually his nose melted,
0:15:10 > 0:15:12and I thought he wasn't that good-looking anyway,
0:15:12 > 0:15:16so I just decided I was just going to move on, you know?
0:15:16 > 0:15:19Go to New York, dance, who cares?
0:15:19 > 0:15:21It's like the old saying -
0:15:21 > 0:15:24there are other fish in the clay head you sculpt.
0:15:24 > 0:15:26That's right, that's right.
0:15:26 > 0:15:30- Oldest saying in the book, you know?- It really is.
0:15:31 > 0:15:33John, I don't know where you told this story, about you,
0:15:33 > 0:15:36you went on a date... Was it in New York you went on this date?
0:15:36 > 0:15:38Yeah, I went on a date in New York.
0:15:38 > 0:15:39Now, bizarrely...
0:15:39 > 0:15:42LAUGHTER
0:15:42 > 0:15:46- Let me just drink this apple juice one second.- You are so funny.
0:15:46 > 0:15:49But this woman didn't know who you were?
0:15:49 > 0:15:52Yes, and it was perfect because, you know, basically, I know Orlando,
0:15:52 > 0:15:55and he gave me some advice before Star Wars 7 came out.
0:15:55 > 0:15:58And his advice was, you know, try and secure, right?
0:15:58 > 0:16:00Try and secure the love of your life before this stuff happens.
0:16:00 > 0:16:04And I did and I'd done the whole process,
0:16:04 > 0:16:07she didn't know what I did until we were driving through Times Square.
0:16:07 > 0:16:09She goes, "What do you do for a living?"
0:16:09 > 0:16:11Looked up, and I said, "That."
0:16:11 > 0:16:13There was me with a saber...
0:16:13 > 0:16:15LAUGHTER
0:16:15 > 0:16:19- Yeah.- Oh, my God. - How surreal for that girl.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21Yeah. I blocked her on my phone.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23LAUGHTER
0:16:23 > 0:16:25Was that the end of that?
0:16:25 > 0:16:27Yeah, I mean, that picture in itself just affected
0:16:27 > 0:16:29her kind of stance in the...
0:16:29 > 0:16:33Once you see a guy with a huge saber, the thing is...
0:16:33 > 0:16:35To get over it...what do you do?
0:16:36 > 0:16:38- That's a power saw...- Yeah.
0:16:40 > 0:16:45Because, Orlando, that idea of people knowing who you were,
0:16:45 > 0:16:47was it in a supermarket when you had the...?
0:16:47 > 0:16:50Yeah, I was in a supermarket.
0:16:50 > 0:16:53The first time that happened to me, where I was recognised by somebody,
0:16:53 > 0:16:56yeah, it was before Lord Of The Rings had come out,
0:16:56 > 0:17:00and I was like 23, or 22, or something.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03But I was walking through a supermarket buying pasta.
0:17:03 > 0:17:05And I'd done some press and stuff...
0:17:05 > 0:17:07No, the first movie had come out - I correct myself.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10This woman came up behind me - and it had only just released -
0:17:10 > 0:17:13and she whispered into my ear, "Are you my elf?"
0:17:14 > 0:17:16And I was like...
0:17:16 > 0:17:18"No, I'm your garden gnome...
0:17:18 > 0:17:20"Just buying some pasta."
0:17:21 > 0:17:24Amy, have you noticed, are men... Have you noticed...
0:17:24 > 0:17:26Can you remember, is there a difference
0:17:26 > 0:17:29- how men are around you now and before?- Yes! Isn't there, Amy?
0:17:29 > 0:17:31No!
0:17:31 > 0:17:34Honestly, like, comedy does not lead to dick - trust me.
0:17:36 > 0:17:37That dress does, though.
0:17:37 > 0:17:41Oh, my God, thank you so much. So nice.
0:17:41 > 0:17:43I will live off that compliment for a year.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45But honestly, for women, I don't think it really helps.
0:17:45 > 0:17:48And guys are like, "I love a funny girl!"
0:17:48 > 0:17:49And they are lying.
0:17:49 > 0:17:50They love to hang with a funny girl,
0:17:50 > 0:17:53but they're not like, "Oh, I can't wait to hit that."
0:17:54 > 0:17:57- But, no... - Goldie is different!
0:17:57 > 0:17:59She's a supermodel and danced her whole life.
0:17:59 > 0:18:01You can't compare that.
0:18:01 > 0:18:06Well, I mean, really, you know, it's not exactly that way.
0:18:06 > 0:18:07I never felt like I was like that - ever!
0:18:07 > 0:18:10Really? My dad had a creepy obsession with her.
0:18:10 > 0:18:12I was small breasted, I had skinny ankles,
0:18:12 > 0:18:14my mouth was too big.
0:18:14 > 0:18:16There were a lot of things that were wrong with me.
0:18:16 > 0:18:19And my eyes didn't... Like, they were so far apart.
0:18:19 > 0:18:21Even the most gorgeous women have these insecurities.
0:18:21 > 0:18:23"Who sculpted this?!"
0:18:24 > 0:18:27Exactly! I mean, like that, you know.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29First dates, wow...
0:18:29 > 0:18:31It's a crazy thing we were talking about.
0:18:31 > 0:18:34What is the worst thing that happened on your date?
0:18:34 > 0:18:35We talked about that.
0:18:35 > 0:18:39And I forgot, but I threw up.
0:18:40 > 0:18:43He tried to kiss me and it made me sick.
0:18:45 > 0:18:49And I literally rolled down the window and I threw up.
0:18:49 > 0:18:54I said, "I'm so sorry... but you made me sick."
0:18:54 > 0:18:57LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:18:57 > 0:18:58It was a bad moment.
0:19:02 > 0:19:05Right, Orlando Bloom, your movie is Unlocked,
0:19:05 > 0:19:06and it opens next Friday.
0:19:06 > 0:19:09And it is one of those great espionage films
0:19:09 > 0:19:10where you don't know who's good,
0:19:10 > 0:19:12you don't know who's bad,
0:19:12 > 0:19:15- and it goes at a real, kind of, lick, doesn't it?- Yeah.
0:19:15 > 0:19:17Tell us who you play and something about the film.
0:19:17 > 0:19:19I play a guy called Jack.
0:19:19 > 0:19:22It was written as a sort of straitlaced, MI5 guy,
0:19:22 > 0:19:24but Michael Apted, who directed it,
0:19:24 > 0:19:27was gracious enough to let me sort of play with the idea,
0:19:27 > 0:19:29and I kind of created a bit more of
0:19:29 > 0:19:32a ne'er-do-well, kind of wild card, mercurial character.
0:19:32 > 0:19:35So he's sort of somebody who probably did some military service
0:19:35 > 0:19:38and then probably did some time inside prison
0:19:38 > 0:19:41and then comes out and is like a hired gun.
0:19:41 > 0:19:43And I'm sort of there to seduce Noomi.
0:19:43 > 0:19:46It's really a female Bond... Bourne, rather.
0:19:46 > 0:19:48And Noomi Rapace plays that character.
0:19:48 > 0:19:49She's amazing in the film.
0:19:49 > 0:19:52And I kind of come in to sort of seduce her
0:19:52 > 0:19:55and then try and get information from her.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57Like, how?
0:19:59 > 0:20:02Just sort of... Kind of like...
0:20:02 > 0:20:04If you whisper, like, "I'm your elf."
0:20:04 > 0:20:07Yeah, exactly!
0:20:07 > 0:20:09I am your garden gnome.
0:20:11 > 0:20:14So, Noomi is in it, you're in it, but it's one of those movies...
0:20:14 > 0:20:18Michael Douglas. John Malkovich. Toni Collette.
0:20:18 > 0:20:20- It's an amazing cast. - It's a really good cast.
0:20:20 > 0:20:22We shot it two years ago, but they actually...
0:20:22 > 0:20:25The script was fantastic, but it needed some reworking at the end,
0:20:25 > 0:20:28and when they came to editing, they realised they had to shoot it.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30And getting Michael and Noomi's schedules together was tricky.
0:20:30 > 0:20:32But it's actually coming out at a great time because
0:20:32 > 0:20:35it's more relevant today than ever, actually. It's a little scary.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38It's about a potential terror attack on London.
0:20:38 > 0:20:41But it's been handled very sensitively, I'd say.
0:20:41 > 0:20:44This clip is you and Noomi Rapace literally in action.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46- Here you go.- Ooh!
0:21:03 > 0:21:05HE CHUCKLES
0:21:05 > 0:21:08- Can I help you? - Yeah, I'm looking for the gents.
0:21:08 > 0:21:11- Behind you. - Silly me. I'm a head-banger.
0:21:11 > 0:21:13HE GROANS
0:21:19 > 0:21:23Now...behave yourselves, all right? Both of you.
0:21:24 > 0:21:26TRANSLATION:
0:21:32 > 0:21:34TRANSLATION:
0:21:35 > 0:21:37..CIA.
0:21:41 > 0:21:44APPLAUSE DROWNS OUT SPEECH
0:21:44 > 0:21:47- That's how I seduce women now. - OK, I'll take it!
0:21:47 > 0:21:50Tray. Smash them over the head. Straight up against the wall.
0:21:50 > 0:21:52You had me when I saw the man bun.
0:21:53 > 0:21:55- Right?- I liked that.
0:21:55 > 0:22:00That fighting, is that nice to not be kind of swashbuckling,
0:22:00 > 0:22:03swords, bows and arrows, actual just fisticuffs?
0:22:03 > 0:22:05Fisticuffs is a bit of fun, actually. Yeah.
0:22:05 > 0:22:08- Have you ever done that fighting before?- Yeah, a couple of times.
0:22:08 > 0:22:12"Oh, actually, yes, I have. Yeah, yeah..."
0:22:12 > 0:22:15There was this guy out in the street outside the studio.
0:22:15 > 0:22:17He was roughing up a grandma.
0:22:17 > 0:22:19So I jumped him. No.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22I have a couple of times, yeah, but, no, it was fun.
0:22:22 > 0:22:26It's nice to get a bit muscular and dynamic.
0:22:26 > 0:22:28But then... So there's fighting people,
0:22:28 > 0:22:31- but you have got a very scary stunt in this film.- Yeah, there was.
0:22:31 > 0:22:33Actually, it was the scariest thing I've ever done,
0:22:33 > 0:22:37and I've done a few scary stunts, but they had a 150 lb Rottweiler.
0:22:37 > 0:22:38So, at the end of this...
0:22:38 > 0:22:41Well, it doesn't ruin it, really, but I get attacked by a dog.
0:22:41 > 0:22:44We were shooting it in Prague in a car park.
0:22:44 > 0:22:45And they had this...
0:22:45 > 0:22:49The animal handler sort of spoke OK English, but not great.
0:22:50 > 0:22:52And I love dogs, love them.
0:22:52 > 0:22:54But this dog turned up with a muzzle on it,
0:22:54 > 0:22:57- like, frothing through the mouth. - HE IMPERSONATES DOG
0:22:57 > 0:22:59And I said, "So, how does this work?"
0:22:59 > 0:23:02So I have a piece of cardboard under my jacket, or cardboard-like stuff,
0:23:02 > 0:23:04and he was sort of like, "Yeah,
0:23:04 > 0:23:06"and you're just going to present your arm, and the dog will clamp
0:23:06 > 0:23:08"cos it has been taught to clamp to this part."
0:23:08 > 0:23:10I was like, "Great."
0:23:10 > 0:23:13So I started to do this, and he goes, "No, no, hand inside."
0:23:13 > 0:23:17I was like, "What?!" I had to get my hand up inside.
0:23:17 > 0:23:19And I'm just thinking...
0:23:19 > 0:23:21You know, that was actually really terrifying,
0:23:21 > 0:23:23to have 130 lb coming at you, just sheer muscle.
0:23:23 > 0:23:27You just go, well, what do they say about working with kids and animals?
0:23:27 > 0:23:29- Do it whenever you can!- Always!
0:23:29 > 0:23:32We were talking about animal handlers today on sets,
0:23:32 > 0:23:34cos they are always so crazy.
0:23:34 > 0:23:39It's just someone off to the side going, like, "Trixie! Trixie! Sit!"
0:23:39 > 0:23:40And you're just like, "Oh, OK..."
0:23:40 > 0:23:43On Overboard, we had, "Buster! Buster! Buster!"
0:23:43 > 0:23:46And I was lying there, and Buster was, like, mauling me.
0:23:46 > 0:23:48And he was trying to get Buster off of me.
0:23:48 > 0:23:52But there were four dogs on me - not just Buster.
0:23:52 > 0:23:55So Buster got, like, top billing.
0:23:56 > 0:23:58Oh, my God. If it was unbelievable.
0:23:58 > 0:24:01Can't believe you did that stunt yourself. That's crazy.
0:24:01 > 0:24:03- It was scary.- Why did you do it yourself, though?
0:24:03 > 0:24:05Cos I kind of love doing that stuff.
0:24:05 > 0:24:07It was a massive adrenaline rush.
0:24:07 > 0:24:11By the way, Bird On A Wire, I did so many stunts with that, with Mel.
0:24:11 > 0:24:13It scared the hell out of me.
0:24:13 > 0:24:15And we were on buildings,
0:24:15 > 0:24:18we were scaling these little things up on a high building
0:24:18 > 0:24:21with a little rope, a little rope,
0:24:21 > 0:24:23tied around the little thing.
0:24:23 > 0:24:25And he's saying to me...
0:24:25 > 0:24:27- AS MEL GIBSON:- "It's all right, Goldie, you can do it.
0:24:27 > 0:24:28"Come on, let's do it."
0:24:28 > 0:24:31At the end of this, cos we did a lot of other stunts on that picture,
0:24:31 > 0:24:33I did get my stuntman's jacket.
0:24:33 > 0:24:35- ORLANDO:- Did you? - GOLDIE:- I did!
0:24:35 > 0:24:37And I tell you, I have that and the Academy Award.
0:24:37 > 0:24:39It's all sitting next to each other.
0:24:39 > 0:24:41Stuntman, Academy Award...
0:24:41 > 0:24:44One kind of falls like that...
0:24:44 > 0:24:47- On the Academy Award. - I could put it on the...!
0:24:47 > 0:24:50I got a stuntman's jacket, but in a different way.
0:24:50 > 0:24:52LAUGHTER
0:24:54 > 0:24:57John, did you get a stuntman's jacket?
0:24:57 > 0:24:58I got a cap.
0:24:59 > 0:25:04I do all my own stunts - I got a cap. It's fantastic.
0:25:04 > 0:25:07These two get a jacket. These hot blondes.
0:25:07 > 0:25:09John, you must say yes to all the stunts,
0:25:09 > 0:25:11because, you know, it's all...
0:25:11 > 0:25:14The movie I just done, I did all of them.
0:25:14 > 0:25:18- I'm 25, I can do that.- Oh!- Yeah.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21- LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE - Yes!
0:25:23 > 0:25:25- You and me!- You and me!- Right here!
0:25:25 > 0:25:27"When you're 25..."
0:25:27 > 0:25:30I'm just trying to do it while I can.
0:25:30 > 0:25:33I don't think I'd do it for ever, though.
0:25:33 > 0:25:37Honestly, that's why I pulled my tit out in this movie.
0:25:37 > 0:25:41You do, you get real tit in the movie.
0:25:41 > 0:25:43Before, they were on the floor. I thought, "Let's bring 'em out."
0:25:45 > 0:25:49Lovely. Something you can look back on. It'll be nice.
0:25:49 > 0:25:51Or look down on.
0:25:52 > 0:25:56And very quickly, we must also mention - this is exciting -
0:25:56 > 0:26:00you are returning to Pirates Of The Caribbean, as Will Turner.
0:26:00 > 0:26:03It's Pirates of the Caribbean: Salazar's Revenge.
0:26:03 > 0:26:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:06 > 0:26:09It's out on 26th May.
0:26:09 > 0:26:12Here's the thing, you're clapping now, you think, "Oh, that's great."
0:26:12 > 0:26:13I'm about to depress you.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16It's been ten years since you were in Pirates Of The Caribbean.
0:26:16 > 0:26:18- It's crazy, isn't it? Ten years. - That is nuts.
0:26:18 > 0:26:22- You'd never believe it, would you? - No!- No! Really wouldn't!
0:26:22 > 0:26:25..to be away from your passion project that long?
0:26:25 > 0:26:26I have missed it so much.
0:26:26 > 0:26:29The good news is, my six-year-old is desperate to see me in it,
0:26:29 > 0:26:31- even if...- Well, that's why.
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Yeah, it's not overly done with special effects.
0:26:33 > 0:26:36The things you see, you get to see
0:26:36 > 0:26:39in Johnny being his fantastic, funny self.
0:26:39 > 0:26:40And is this the end of it,
0:26:40 > 0:26:42or is it going to go on, are there more after this?
0:26:42 > 0:26:46- Are you kidding me?!- There's more. - Do people have more money?
0:26:47 > 0:26:50I think they're doing a lot of them now, you know? Aren't they?
0:26:50 > 0:26:53I don't know. We'll see. I think there might be room for one more.
0:26:53 > 0:26:55I don't know. This is five.
0:26:55 > 0:26:57How many have they done of the Fast And Furious? I don't know.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00- I think this...- It's going to hit the billion-dollar mark soon.
0:27:00 > 0:27:04- So is ours, Goldie! - Unbelievable.- Yeah!
0:27:04 > 0:27:07- Snatched Again.- Snatched!
0:27:07 > 0:27:09- Snatch Me Up!- Yes.
0:27:09 > 0:27:12- Snatch Us Both.- Yeah!
0:27:12 > 0:27:13That's good, that's good.
0:27:13 > 0:27:17I love how different all the things are on the show tonight.
0:27:17 > 0:27:22John Boyega, your new job couldn't be further from Star Wars.
0:27:22 > 0:27:26You are starring in Woyzeck at the Old Vic, just round the corner here.
0:27:26 > 0:27:28It opens on the 15th May, till the 25th of June.
0:27:28 > 0:27:30Now, I have to say, I've heard of this play.
0:27:30 > 0:27:32I think they did it when I was in college.
0:27:32 > 0:27:33So tell us about it.
0:27:33 > 0:27:38Oh, it's a crazy play based on a soldier going through
0:27:38 > 0:27:41post-traumatic stress and basically you're just watching the play
0:27:41 > 0:27:45following the disintegration of his mental health while he's trying to
0:27:45 > 0:27:48take care of his girlfriend, with a two-month-old baby and living
0:27:48 > 0:27:53on top of a kind of abattoir, and he's hot and broken.
0:27:53 > 0:27:55Yeah, it's a deep,
0:27:55 > 0:27:58dark play that I just decided to do after all this colourful Star Wars
0:27:58 > 0:28:02stuff and just to find a way of interacting with an intimate
0:28:02 > 0:28:05- audience every night...- Yeah.- ..and going back to the craft, you know,
0:28:05 > 0:28:07cos I started in a theatre so it's time to continue.
0:28:07 > 0:28:09But you've started in a theatre, but you never played...
0:28:09 > 0:28:12You know, you were never Woyzeck in Woyzeck before.
0:28:12 > 0:28:14- I mean, it's a big difference. - Yeah, no, no.
0:28:14 > 0:28:17Yeah, the last time I was on stage I was just basically
0:28:17 > 0:28:20a glorified extra. I was, you know, taking props off
0:28:20 > 0:28:21and bringing them on.
0:28:21 > 0:28:23They never gave me my chance.
0:28:23 > 0:28:26- LAUGHTER - What play? What play was it?
0:28:26 > 0:28:28- And you didn't give up showbusiness? - I was in three plays at the
0:28:28 > 0:28:30Tricycle Theatre and it was three
0:28:30 > 0:28:34plays that ran the same time and, yeah, it was great but I was
0:28:34 > 0:28:37- never the lead of it, so this is a big challenge.- Look at you now.
0:28:37 > 0:28:39- LAUGHTER - Wow.- Yeah.
0:28:39 > 0:28:42- APPLAUSE AND CHEERING - Yeah!
0:28:43 > 0:28:45- But of course...- Boy done good.
0:28:45 > 0:28:49We should also... I suppose we should be clear that, you know,
0:28:49 > 0:28:52- younger fans...- Mmm.- ..of Star Wars probably shouldn't see this play.
0:28:52 > 0:28:53It's quite a violent play.
0:28:53 > 0:28:55- No, all you should come.- OK!
0:28:55 > 0:28:57LAUGHTER OK, John said!
0:28:57 > 0:29:00- It is dark, though.- I do think it's an important play.- Yes.
0:29:00 > 0:29:03I think it's very important because it is something that's very real.
0:29:03 > 0:29:07- Yeah.- And there are ways and means that you can help this but it's
0:29:07 > 0:29:09a terrible dysfunction that's happened here.
0:29:09 > 0:29:10It was written, like, 200 years ago.
0:29:10 > 0:29:14So the writer died while he was writing it, at 23.
0:29:14 > 0:29:17- So it's open to interpretation and we have...- Uh-huh.
0:29:17 > 0:29:18..Jack Thorne writing,
0:29:18 > 0:29:20who done Harry Potter And The Cursed Child,
0:29:20 > 0:29:24we have the amazing Joe Murphy directing, so it's...
0:29:24 > 0:29:26And it's the Old Vic, so it's a chance to kind of... Yeah.
0:29:26 > 0:29:29Daniel Radcliffe is on stage at the Old Vic and Kevin Spacey's
0:29:29 > 0:29:32- been on, so I just wanted to be part of...- You're in good company.- Yeah.
0:29:32 > 0:29:34- You feel good about it.- We're leaving Saturday, is it rude...?
0:29:34 > 0:29:36Would you mind doing it right now?
0:29:36 > 0:29:38- LAUGHTER - Is that rude?
0:29:38 > 0:29:40- Is that rude?- Get up.
0:29:40 > 0:29:43Yeah, and John can pass on your best to Daniel Radcliffe backstage.
0:29:43 > 0:29:45- Yes. That's right. - LAUGHTER
0:29:45 > 0:29:47- Is he in it?- Yeah, he's in the play that's on there now.
0:29:47 > 0:29:49What do you get for 100 bucks?
0:29:49 > 0:29:52LAUGHTER
0:29:52 > 0:29:54- A meet and greet. - Oh, OK, great. Great.
0:29:54 > 0:29:55Er. Er, John. John. John.
0:29:55 > 0:29:56Sorry, mate, we were just...
0:29:56 > 0:29:59Yeah, I know it's a chat show but there's a sort of structure to it.
0:29:59 > 0:30:01Er... LAUGHTER
0:30:03 > 0:30:05Chat in this direction.
0:30:05 > 0:30:07- Yeah.- That's true.
0:30:07 > 0:30:10But no, the thing about the Old Vic is that...
0:30:10 > 0:30:13I read when you used to be on the bus, you would look at the Old Vic.
0:30:13 > 0:30:15Yeah, yeah, I mean, I love going to the theatre.
0:30:15 > 0:30:19I always went to the National, the Almeida, and I loved going,
0:30:19 > 0:30:22but the old Vic I just never related to because I was one of those
0:30:22 > 0:30:25people who would go to the building and look at the picture to
0:30:25 > 0:30:27see what I could be involved in, to see what I could see,
0:30:27 > 0:30:29and it'd always be people like this,
0:30:29 > 0:30:31- talking all the time. - LAUGHTER
0:30:31 > 0:30:34And for me, I just wanted to see something that's more real,
0:30:34 > 0:30:36something that's more gritty and something that just expands
0:30:36 > 0:30:39their audience, and the Old Vic is doing that right now,
0:30:39 > 0:30:42they're trying to bring in more people from different
0:30:42 > 0:30:46backgrounds and trying to pump in diversity, and I'm all about that.
0:30:46 > 0:30:48And obviously with all your friends and things,
0:30:48 > 0:30:51- it's easy to get them on board with something like Star Wars.- Yeah.
0:30:51 > 0:30:54"We'll do that." Are they going to come and see you in this?
0:30:54 > 0:30:57- No. - LAUGHTER
0:30:57 > 0:30:58It's a crazy one.
0:30:58 > 0:31:01There will be bum-cheeks involved, there will be a lot of...
0:31:01 > 0:31:02Your bum-cheeks?
0:31:02 > 0:31:05- Well... - LAUGHTER
0:31:05 > 0:31:07- INAUDIBLE SPEECH - Yeah, I mean, there will...
0:31:07 > 0:31:08It'd sell those tickets! Yeah. LAUGHTER
0:31:08 > 0:31:10Right. But it's...
0:31:10 > 0:31:14Going into Woyzeck's mind, and it has like an avant-garde,
0:31:14 > 0:31:16contemporary, twisted feel to it,
0:31:16 > 0:31:20like, there's a moment that I can share that I am kind of
0:31:20 > 0:31:22breast-fed by my mother.
0:31:22 > 0:31:23And... Yeah.
0:31:23 > 0:31:24Like, how?
0:31:24 > 0:31:27LAUGHTER
0:31:27 > 0:31:29I think we should stretch on.
0:31:29 > 0:31:32What I do is...
0:31:32 > 0:31:36- Come on.- You asked! CHEERING
0:31:36 > 0:31:37I'm getting that Star Wars money.
0:31:38 > 0:31:40Oh, my God!
0:31:43 > 0:31:46Very consensual. Very consensual.
0:31:46 > 0:31:48- LAUGHTER - No holding back here!
0:31:48 > 0:31:49Yeah, yeah, yeah.
0:31:49 > 0:31:51I like that, you asked and it happened.
0:31:51 > 0:31:53- LAUGHTER - Consent. Consent.
0:31:55 > 0:31:58And we talked about your friends, that aren't going to see
0:31:58 > 0:31:59this play, I think...
0:31:59 > 0:32:01How have they coped with what's happened to you,
0:32:01 > 0:32:04that you are now John Boyega from Star Wars?
0:32:04 > 0:32:08I mean, I live with my boy Stefan and we kind of live a peaceful life.
0:32:08 > 0:32:11I'm 25, but to be honest, inside, I feel 73.
0:32:11 > 0:32:13Like, I just like being inside.
0:32:13 > 0:32:16I like going for walks, you know, I like looking at the sky and
0:32:16 > 0:32:19bringing up unnecessary facts about life.
0:32:19 > 0:32:21LAUGHTER
0:32:21 > 0:32:22You sound like a riot.
0:32:26 > 0:32:27And Goldie, you know,
0:32:27 > 0:32:30the whole thing that John's going through, this kind of sudden
0:32:30 > 0:32:33- wow, you know, you're on billboards in Times Square.- Yeah.
0:32:33 > 0:32:36I mean, that happened to you, cos when it hit, it hit fast.
0:32:36 > 0:32:38- Yeah, it hit very fast.- Rowan And Martin's Laugh-In,
0:32:38 > 0:32:40- biggest show in the world.- Exactly.
0:32:40 > 0:32:43- Oscar for your first movie, Cactus Flower.- Right.- I mean, it's...
0:32:43 > 0:32:46Was anyone guiding you through it?
0:32:46 > 0:32:48Was anyone manoeuvring you through all the perils of that?
0:32:48 > 0:32:50You know, that's a really good question.
0:32:50 > 0:32:53I think what happened to me was that I got anxious.
0:32:53 > 0:32:57And I became anxious in many ways
0:32:57 > 0:33:00and I didn't understand it so I started seeing a psychologist.
0:33:00 > 0:33:04Because I wanted to know why I was feeling anxious about all of this.
0:33:04 > 0:33:05A - it wasn't a life plan,
0:33:05 > 0:33:09B - I wanted to go home and marry a dentist and open a dancing school.
0:33:09 > 0:33:11I had a really fabulous life plan.
0:33:11 > 0:33:13And this turned out to be different,
0:33:13 > 0:33:16so I really was tutorialled through having a psychologist.
0:33:16 > 0:33:19And the other thing I like about sort of when suddenly careers
0:33:19 > 0:33:24take off like this, suddenly big cheques arrive. Where there was
0:33:24 > 0:33:27no cash, suddenly there's cash.
0:33:27 > 0:33:30So, do you remember, what was the kind of stupidest thing you
0:33:30 > 0:33:31bought when cheques started landing on the mat?
0:33:31 > 0:33:34You know, I've been thinking about this question and I've bought
0:33:34 > 0:33:37- a lot of stupid things. - LAUGHTER
0:33:37 > 0:33:40But I remember when I was going down to Laugh-In, to the studio.
0:33:40 > 0:33:42I stopped by - cos I love flowers -
0:33:42 > 0:33:45and I didn't have any vases and I bought
0:33:45 > 0:33:49a vase and it was almost too big for my house that I was living in.
0:33:49 > 0:33:52- LAUGHTER - It had little, like, white roses
0:33:52 > 0:33:55embossed on it and I've kept it for all these years
0:33:55 > 0:34:00because it said something to me about this one stupid thing
0:34:00 > 0:34:03I bought that I, through all the moves and the houses and the life,
0:34:03 > 0:34:05I never wanted to get rid of.
0:34:05 > 0:34:07So it said something, you know,
0:34:07 > 0:34:09it was a stupid vase and it was this...
0:34:09 > 0:34:11- LAUGHTER - Carrying it through...
0:34:11 > 0:34:13- Do you have it?- ..my little apartment. Yeah.
0:34:13 > 0:34:15- Aw!- Yeah. I still have it.
0:34:15 > 0:34:17- Can I have it? - LAUGHTER
0:34:17 > 0:34:19- I'll mail it to you.- Thank you.
0:34:19 > 0:34:22What have you wasted the most money on?
0:34:23 > 0:34:24My siblings?
0:34:24 > 0:34:26- Erm... - LAUGHTER
0:34:26 > 0:34:29Yeah, you know what? I was like...
0:34:29 > 0:34:33- I know I seem like a drunk whore or whatever, but... Erm. - LAUGHTER
0:34:33 > 0:34:37But what's fun about getting money is that you can, you know,
0:34:37 > 0:34:38give it to your family and friends. I give a lot
0:34:38 > 0:34:41to my family and friends. And I did a movie about PTSD,
0:34:41 > 0:34:44called Thank You For Your Service, which is coming out in October,
0:34:44 > 0:34:46and I donated my whole salary to
0:34:46 > 0:34:49- people who are suffering from post-traumatic stress.- Wow. - APPLAUSE
0:34:49 > 0:34:51What are you doing with your salary?
0:34:53 > 0:34:55But honestly. You know.
0:34:55 > 0:34:56Getting to give...
0:34:56 > 0:34:59Cos, yeah, I'm afraid, I watch all those NBA real-life
0:34:59 > 0:35:01documentaries, I don't want to go out like that,
0:35:01 > 0:35:03so I hang onto it or I, you know,
0:35:03 > 0:35:05give it to charity and friends and family.
0:35:05 > 0:35:07- Oh.- I bought a gold-plated private jet.
0:35:07 > 0:35:08LAUGHTER
0:35:08 > 0:35:11He does more charity work than anybody.
0:35:11 > 0:35:13- I know that about you. - No, but you do...- Oh.
0:35:13 > 0:35:15You do go shopping, though. You do go shopping.
0:35:15 > 0:35:17- Shop till I drop.- Yeah.
0:35:17 > 0:35:19- You wouldn't know.- No.
0:35:19 > 0:35:21- Motorbikes are your thing. - Motorbikes are my thing, yeah.- Yeah.
0:35:21 > 0:35:24- So do you have loads?- Cos my mum said I could never have a motorbike
0:35:24 > 0:35:26when I was a kid and all I wanted was a motorbike.
0:35:26 > 0:35:28If I'd had a motorbike when I was 12, I probably would've got it out
0:35:28 > 0:35:31- my system.- So it's her fault. - LAUGHTER
0:35:31 > 0:35:33Yeah, my mum's fault. Yeah, exactly!
0:35:33 > 0:35:36- That's why I've got 20 in my garage now.- That's her.- Yeah.
0:35:36 > 0:35:39But now, John Boyega, you...
0:35:39 > 0:35:41Man, why you always say my name like that?
0:35:41 > 0:35:43- LAUGHTER - Like, "What have I done now?"
0:35:43 > 0:35:44No, this is good.
0:35:44 > 0:35:48No, John... John got his Star Wars cash and he...
0:35:48 > 0:35:52I don't know where you hit, but you hit a shop, a wonderful shop...
0:35:52 > 0:35:55- Yep.- And you have bought some stuff.
0:35:55 > 0:35:58So you very kindly brought some pictures of some of the things
0:35:58 > 0:36:00- you bought.- Yeah, I did, I did. - Your bed...
0:36:00 > 0:36:02At the bottom of your bed, what have you got?
0:36:02 > 0:36:05I've got some lions, sculptures of lions. Yeah.
0:36:05 > 0:36:08- So, his bed is guarded...- Oh! What?! - LAUGHTER
0:36:08 > 0:36:12Those are like trinkets compared to what else you've got. You bought...
0:36:12 > 0:36:15But the reason why I bought that is because I feel
0:36:15 > 0:36:18- like my spirit animal is a lion. I just feel that.- Mmm.
0:36:18 > 0:36:22You know, I am African, I am...
0:36:22 > 0:36:25- Yes!- ..everything. - LAUGHTER
0:36:25 > 0:36:28- Alive!- So that's why you bought the lions.
0:36:28 > 0:36:30- Yes.- Why did you buy the saxophone lamp?
0:36:30 > 0:36:32- LAUGHTER - Erm...
0:36:32 > 0:36:34To be honest with you, there's no reason for that, man.
0:36:34 > 0:36:35That was glorified nonsense.
0:36:35 > 0:36:37I can't lie to you.
0:36:37 > 0:36:38- Yeah.- That is hilarious.
0:36:38 > 0:36:40Now, I don't mean to criticise it.
0:36:40 > 0:36:43I mean, I mean...I was in Australia and this dude just told
0:36:43 > 0:36:46me that there's a saxophone with a light bulb with it.
0:36:46 > 0:36:50- LAUGHTER - Yeah.- And something in my brain said to me, "Buy."
0:36:50 > 0:36:53- LAUGHTER Yes.- But you need that.
0:36:53 > 0:36:56- You need that.- By the way, I made a lamp out of my father's clarinet.
0:36:56 > 0:36:59- Oh, yeah.- Oh!- Right?- Cool. So you know how that was made. I had no
0:36:59 > 0:37:01- idea how to put it together. - Well, there's a... We have a thing.
0:37:01 > 0:37:04It has something to do with something that we share.
0:37:04 > 0:37:05You're like a lion.
0:37:05 > 0:37:07I like... I'm like a lion...
0:37:07 > 0:37:08Kind of. Yeah, I could do that.
0:37:08 > 0:37:10- LAUGHTER - But how about that?
0:37:10 > 0:37:13- You have a saxophone lamp and I have a clarinet lamp.- Yeah.
0:37:13 > 0:37:14Goldie, can I just ask you,
0:37:14 > 0:37:17do you have a more attractive bulb in yours?
0:37:17 > 0:37:19LAUGHTER
0:37:19 > 0:37:22- Well...- That is an ugly ass bulb, John.
0:37:22 > 0:37:24LAUGHTER
0:37:24 > 0:37:26That is an economy light-saving one.
0:37:26 > 0:37:27It's environmentally friendly.
0:37:27 > 0:37:29- It's environmentally friendly. - Yeah, yeah.
0:37:29 > 0:37:33I would find a little clip-on shade, maybe or something that just...
0:37:33 > 0:37:34Then, you've...
0:37:34 > 0:37:37We've been in the bedroom. We've now...
0:37:37 > 0:37:39I don't know where that is but we've walked past that.
0:37:39 > 0:37:42- That's my living room. - And where do we find this?
0:37:42 > 0:37:44That's in the corridor.
0:37:44 > 0:37:45OK.
0:37:45 > 0:37:46Is it an antique?
0:37:46 > 0:37:49Erm, no, I just got it off Gumtree or something,
0:37:49 > 0:37:51- do you know what I mean? - OK.
0:37:51 > 0:37:55It's just a replica of a Spartan helmet.
0:37:55 > 0:37:57Did it come with the plinth or did you buy that separately?
0:37:57 > 0:37:59No, I bought that separately.
0:37:59 > 0:38:01- OK.- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Putting it together.
0:38:01 > 0:38:03- Yeah, I put it together.- But now... - Put it together.
0:38:03 > 0:38:05Is there a light inside?
0:38:05 > 0:38:07No, no, there isn't.
0:38:07 > 0:38:10I'm just a big fan of weird things. I told you, I'm 73, deep down.
0:38:10 > 0:38:13ORLANDO BLOOM: Have you ever put it on?
0:38:13 > 0:38:16Wait. When... You're in John's house and you want to go to the loo, so,
0:38:16 > 0:38:17you've seen the lions, you're excited,
0:38:17 > 0:38:20the saxophone lamp is brilliant, you really enjoyed that helmet
0:38:20 > 0:38:22- on your way to the toilet... - Give it to them.
0:38:22 > 0:38:24You get into the loo...
0:38:24 > 0:38:25- OK.- ..you sit down...
0:38:25 > 0:38:27- Uh-huh.- ..you do your business,
0:38:27 > 0:38:31you need a little bit of toilet paper. In John's house, this is who gives it to you.
0:38:31 > 0:38:32Boom.
0:38:32 > 0:38:36LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:38:36 > 0:38:38That is amazing.
0:38:40 > 0:38:42I love that.
0:38:42 > 0:38:44You're jealous, aren't you?
0:38:44 > 0:38:46- You're all jealous. - I'm so jealous.
0:38:46 > 0:38:49I'm imagining going over there, as a girl, you know,
0:38:49 > 0:38:52and you get to the bathroom, and you're like, "That's a red flag."
0:38:52 > 0:38:53LAUGHTER
0:38:53 > 0:38:55APPLAUSE
0:38:57 > 0:38:59OK. Erm...
0:38:59 > 0:39:00It's, er...
0:39:00 > 0:39:02It's time for music. Now, I don't know...
0:39:02 > 0:39:04Goldie Hawn, have you ever seen the Eurovision Song Contest?
0:39:04 > 0:39:06- No.- Eurovision Song Contest?
0:39:06 > 0:39:08Oh, yeah.
0:39:08 > 0:39:11LAUGHTER Well, anyway, on the 13th May,
0:39:11 > 0:39:13I hope you'll be watching, and waving flags
0:39:13 > 0:39:17because on the 13th May, the nation will be pinning its hopes
0:39:17 > 0:39:20on this young lady at the Eurovision Song Contest in Kiev.
0:39:20 > 0:39:24Performing Never Give Up On You, it is Lucie Jones.
0:39:24 > 0:39:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:39:28 > 0:39:30# Tell me your secrets
0:39:30 > 0:39:32# I'll keep them safe
0:39:32 > 0:39:34# No sign of weakness
0:39:34 > 0:39:35# It's a sign of faith
0:39:35 > 0:39:39# We'll stand tall
0:39:39 > 0:39:43# So you don't fall
0:39:43 > 0:39:45# You're not defeated
0:39:45 > 0:39:47# You're in repair
0:39:47 > 0:39:49# Don't have to call me
0:39:49 > 0:39:50# I'll always be there
0:39:50 > 0:39:53# We'll stand tall
0:39:53 > 0:39:58# So you don't fall
0:39:58 > 0:40:02# If you could see how far you've walked
0:40:02 > 0:40:06# You would see that all's not lost
0:40:06 > 0:40:10# I will never give up on you
0:40:10 > 0:40:14# I don't care what I've got to lose
0:40:14 > 0:40:18# Just give me your hand and hold on
0:40:18 > 0:40:21# Together we'll dance through this storm
0:40:21 > 0:40:25# I will never give up on you
0:40:25 > 0:40:29# You're the one that I'm running to
0:40:29 > 0:40:33# Just give me your hand and hold on
0:40:33 > 0:40:38# Together we'll dance through this storm
0:40:38 > 0:40:43# Under the surface I see you glow
0:40:43 > 0:40:46# I'm right beside you, you're never alone
0:40:46 > 0:40:49# Don't let go
0:40:49 > 0:40:53# When you're so close
0:40:53 > 0:40:57# If you could see how far you've walked
0:40:57 > 0:41:02# You would see that all's not lost
0:41:02 > 0:41:06# I will never give up on you
0:41:06 > 0:41:10# I don't care what I've got to lose
0:41:10 > 0:41:14# Just give me your hand and hold on
0:41:14 > 0:41:17# Together we'll dance through this storm
0:41:17 > 0:41:21# I will never give up on you
0:41:21 > 0:41:25# You're the one that I'm running to
0:41:25 > 0:41:29# Just give me your hand and hold on
0:41:29 > 0:41:34# Together we're dancing through this madness
0:41:34 > 0:41:37# We're running through this magic
0:41:37 > 0:41:39# It's inside of you
0:41:39 > 0:41:41# This madness
0:41:41 > 0:41:44# This madness
0:41:46 > 0:41:49# Now you can see how far you've walked
0:41:49 > 0:41:58# The mountains climbed, the oceans cro-o-o-o-ossed
0:41:58 > 0:42:02# I don't care what I've got to lose
0:42:02 > 0:42:06# Just give me your hand and hold on
0:42:06 > 0:42:09# Together we'll dance through this storm
0:42:09 > 0:42:13# I will never give up on you
0:42:13 > 0:42:17# You're the one that I'm running to
0:42:17 > 0:42:21# Just give me your hand and hold on
0:42:21 > 0:42:26# Together we'll dance through this storm. #
0:42:26 > 0:42:32APPLAUSE AND CHEERING Lucie Jones, everybody!
0:42:32 > 0:42:33Genius.
0:42:33 > 0:42:35Come over here, dear.
0:42:35 > 0:42:38Bare feet, bare feet. I said bare feet.
0:42:38 > 0:42:40Hello, darling. Congratulations.
0:42:40 > 0:42:43Come and meet everybody. What a great performance.
0:42:43 > 0:42:47John, Orlando, Amy, Goldie,
0:42:47 > 0:42:48that's who that is.
0:42:48 > 0:42:51- Hi, how are you?- Well done, love. - Thank you very much. Hi.
0:42:51 > 0:42:53- AMY:- Mwah! Mwah!- There you go.
0:42:53 > 0:42:54Hi, Goldie Hawn.
0:42:54 > 0:42:56Wow. LAUGHTER
0:42:56 > 0:42:58- Have a seat. Well deserved. - Thank you.
0:42:58 > 0:43:00Lucie Jones, that was fantastic.
0:43:00 > 0:43:03If you do it that well on the night, we'll all be delighted.
0:43:03 > 0:43:05Oh, thank you. I really hope I don't...
0:43:05 > 0:43:07I'm not wearing any shoes.
0:43:07 > 0:43:09- But I like that. - And that is for a real reason.
0:43:09 > 0:43:12I just can't sing or stand or walk...
0:43:12 > 0:43:13LAUGHTER
0:43:13 > 0:43:17..anything like straight line wise, when I'm wearing any shoes.
0:43:17 > 0:43:19Like, Converse is a struggle.
0:43:19 > 0:43:21- So, this is why.- Were you brought up by wolves? What...
0:43:21 > 0:43:23LAUGHTER
0:43:24 > 0:43:28I grew up in Wales, so I was always on a hill. So, maybe that's why.
0:43:28 > 0:43:31- That could be it.- Maybe. - Now, by the way...
0:43:31 > 0:43:33has anyone here been to Kiev?
0:43:33 > 0:43:35Not to Kiev.
0:43:35 > 0:43:38Actually, I have relatives from there but they were born in
0:43:38 > 0:43:39like 1780 or something.
0:43:39 > 0:43:43But I definitely have Kiev in there, somewhere.
0:43:43 > 0:43:46LAUGHTER
0:43:46 > 0:43:48Where's Kiev?
0:43:48 > 0:43:50Anywhere you like it.
0:43:50 > 0:43:51I had chicken Kiev the other night.
0:43:51 > 0:43:54LAUGHTER
0:43:54 > 0:43:56Listen, we'll see you on the night.
0:43:56 > 0:44:00I do think it's such a brave, big job you are doing for the UK.
0:44:00 > 0:44:02Thank you. I'm going to give it a go.
0:44:02 > 0:44:04- We really appreciate you doing it. - Thank you.
0:44:04 > 0:44:06APPLAUSE
0:44:06 > 0:44:09Good luck on the 13th. Lucie Jones, everybody!
0:44:09 > 0:44:11APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:44:11 > 0:44:13Right, that is nearly it.
0:44:13 > 0:44:16Before we go, time for a visit to the big red chair.
0:44:16 > 0:44:18Who dere? Hello.
0:44:18 > 0:44:20- Hello.- Hi, what's your name?
0:44:20 > 0:44:23- Orla.- Orla. Lovely. I'm guessing you're from Ireland.
0:44:23 > 0:44:24- Yeah.- Do you live there or here?
0:44:24 > 0:44:28- I live here but go back there all the time.- Oh, fair enough.
0:44:28 > 0:44:31Erm... And what do you do here, Orla?
0:44:31 > 0:44:32I'm a primary school teacher.
0:44:32 > 0:44:34- A primary school teacher?- Yeah.
0:44:34 > 0:44:36All the ages? Or some of them?
0:44:36 > 0:44:38- Year one.- What age are they?
0:44:38 > 0:44:40- Five and six.- Five and six. Does that not drive you insane,
0:44:40 > 0:44:42talking to people who are five and six all day?
0:44:42 > 0:44:44No, I love it so much.
0:44:44 > 0:44:45OK, Orla.
0:44:45 > 0:44:47LAUGHTER Off you go with your story.
0:44:47 > 0:44:49Will it start with "Once upon a time," I wonder?
0:44:49 > 0:44:51No. On you go with your story.
0:44:51 > 0:44:52OK. So, a few years ago,
0:44:52 > 0:44:56I was teaching in a class and we had the globes out and the children
0:44:56 > 0:44:59were discovering the new countries they had never seen before.
0:44:59 > 0:45:01And a little boy pointed to a country and said,
0:45:01 > 0:45:05"What country is this?" And I said, "Oh, Papua New Guinea.
0:45:05 > 0:45:08"Does anybody know why Papua New Guinea is really famous?"
0:45:08 > 0:45:11Nobody knew. So, I said, "Well, they still eat humans there,
0:45:11 > 0:45:13"it's really strange.
0:45:13 > 0:45:15"Right. Does anybody know what that is,
0:45:15 > 0:45:17"when another human eats another human?"
0:45:17 > 0:45:19And this little boy stuck his hand up and said, "Yeah, I know.
0:45:19 > 0:45:21"Lesbians."
0:45:21 > 0:45:22LAUGHTER
0:45:22 > 0:45:25APPLAUSE
0:45:25 > 0:45:27Good story, Orla.
0:45:28 > 0:45:30That's a really good story.
0:45:30 > 0:45:31Very good.
0:45:31 > 0:45:33And if you'd like to join us on the show
0:45:33 > 0:45:35and have a go in that red chair,
0:45:35 > 0:45:38contact us via our website at this very address.
0:45:38 > 0:45:42Listen, that's it tonight. Please say thank you to all my guests.
0:45:42 > 0:45:44Lucie Jones! Good luck, Lucie Jones.
0:45:44 > 0:45:46Mr John Boyega!
0:45:46 > 0:45:48APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:45:48 > 0:45:51Orlando Bloom!
0:45:51 > 0:45:53Amy Schumer!
0:45:53 > 0:45:57And Goldie Hawn! APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:45:57 > 0:45:59Join me next week with pop group Gorillaz,
0:45:59 > 0:46:02and a great sofa of acting talent, Kevin Bacon, Jessica Chastain,
0:46:02 > 0:46:05Michael Fassbender, and Hollywood legend Diane Keaton.
0:46:05 > 0:46:07I'll see you then. Goodnight, everyone, bye.
0:46:07 > 0:46:10APPLAUSE AND CHEERING