New Year's Eve Show

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0:00:02 > 0:00:04Hi, everyone, I'm Hugh Jackman, it's New Year's Eve,

0:00:04 > 0:00:06welcome to The Graham Norton Show!

0:00:06 > 0:00:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:00:24 > 0:00:25Oh! Oh!

0:00:25 > 0:00:27CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:00:27 > 0:00:30Oh-ho-ho! Too kind.

0:00:30 > 0:00:33Thank you very much. Thank you.

0:00:33 > 0:00:37Welcome to the show and happy New Year's Eve!

0:00:37 > 0:00:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Yay!

0:00:41 > 0:00:43Yay!

0:00:43 > 0:00:45Yay, it's really happening...

0:00:45 > 0:00:47We've got a great sofa of guests

0:00:47 > 0:00:49to ease you towards the midnight celebrations.

0:00:49 > 0:00:51By the way, if you are planning to have

0:00:51 > 0:00:55a fireworks demonstration tonight, please remember, never return to

0:00:55 > 0:00:58a lit one as it can backfire on you,

0:00:58 > 0:01:00like, I don't know, like a snap election.

0:01:02 > 0:01:03That was fun!

0:01:03 > 0:01:06Oh, I wonder if Theresa May got what she wanted for Christmas?

0:01:06 > 0:01:08Hindsight. Yeah...

0:01:10 > 0:01:12I do hope at home you've got a drink in hand.

0:01:12 > 0:01:15Not so much to toast in the New Year -

0:01:15 > 0:01:17more to help you forget the old one! Yeah!

0:01:17 > 0:01:202017, ladies and gentlemen - what a year!

0:01:20 > 0:01:23In China, it was the Year of the Monkey. Yeah.

0:01:23 > 0:01:24In America, Year of the Cock.

0:01:24 > 0:01:28LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:01:32 > 0:01:34Donald...

0:01:34 > 0:01:37Donald wasn't the only American in the news this year, no.

0:01:37 > 0:01:40In November, an American won the lottery. Yeah.

0:01:43 > 0:01:46"Yes! Yes!

0:01:46 > 0:01:48"Stupid acting! Yes!"

0:01:49 > 0:01:52In the UK, Theresa May started the Brexit process

0:01:52 > 0:01:53by triggering Article 50.

0:01:53 > 0:01:57Or, as it's now called, Article 50 billion.

0:01:57 > 0:01:59This was David Davis in August,

0:01:59 > 0:02:01insisting the UK will not give the EU a blank cheque,

0:02:01 > 0:02:03and here he is in September...

0:02:03 > 0:02:05..giving them a blank cheque!

0:02:05 > 0:02:07This year, Tim Farron resigned as Lib Dem leader

0:02:07 > 0:02:10because of his Christian views on gay sex.

0:02:10 > 0:02:13To be fair to Tim, he did a very Christian thing when he resigned -

0:02:13 > 0:02:16he gave up a seat to an elderly person.

0:02:16 > 0:02:20Yeah. Awww! Vince, look at him!

0:02:20 > 0:02:22Already talk of Vince Cable being replaced.

0:02:22 > 0:02:24Mind you, it can't be the first time he's heard the words

0:02:24 > 0:02:27"Do you think you'll survive the winter?"

0:02:27 > 0:02:29LAUGHTER

0:02:29 > 0:02:32Let's get some guests on! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:02:32 > 0:02:37Later, we'll be meeting Dr Foster star, Suranne Jones, will be here.

0:02:37 > 0:02:40And we'll be chatting to one of our greatest actors, Gary Oldman.

0:02:40 > 0:02:42CHEERING

0:02:42 > 0:02:45Plus, we'll be seeing out the year with a great musical performance

0:02:45 > 0:02:47by the Leading Ladies.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50They will be performing One Night Only.

0:02:50 > 0:02:53But first, three hot stars from the new musical extravaganza

0:02:53 > 0:02:55The Greatest Showman,

0:02:55 > 0:02:59starting with the all-singing, all-dancing Mr Zac Efron!

0:02:59 > 0:03:01CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Yeah!

0:03:04 > 0:03:06They thought I was lying! That's Zac Efron.

0:03:08 > 0:03:11She's one of Hollywood's most influential young stars -

0:03:11 > 0:03:12it's Zendaya!

0:03:12 > 0:03:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:03:14 > 0:03:16So sparkly!

0:03:16 > 0:03:19Hello, you're very welcome. Mwah and mwah!

0:03:19 > 0:03:20Go and sit beside Zac there.

0:03:21 > 0:03:23And he's not only The Greatest Showman,

0:03:23 > 0:03:25he's one of our all-time favourite guests.

0:03:25 > 0:03:27It is Mr Hugh Jackman!

0:03:27 > 0:03:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:03:32 > 0:03:36APPLAUSE DROWNS OUT SPEECH

0:03:41 > 0:03:44Oh! Lovely to see you all.

0:03:44 > 0:03:47Happy New Year! Happy New Year! Come on.

0:03:47 > 0:03:49- You're good, you're good!- Yes.

0:03:49 > 0:03:52DEADPAN: Thank you for joining us on this special evening.

0:03:54 > 0:03:58It's just I'm Australian - I will be vomiting in 30 minutes.

0:03:59 > 0:04:02- Did you all have a nice Christmas? - The best!- Yeah?!

0:04:02 > 0:04:06- LAUGHTER - Oh...

0:04:06 > 0:04:07I don't know where to begin.

0:04:09 > 0:04:10Zac, I don't want to pry.

0:04:10 > 0:04:13What was your best present, Zac? What was your best present?

0:04:13 > 0:04:14A-ha, ah, yeah...

0:04:17 > 0:04:19This is a good game, isn't it?! Good game.

0:04:19 > 0:04:22- I still have yet to get it for myself.- OK!

0:04:23 > 0:04:27- Zac gave me a car. A car! - That's so nice!- I heard that!

0:04:27 > 0:04:30- The Bugatti.- It was amazing.

0:04:30 > 0:04:32- How did you like it? - I just loved it.

0:04:32 > 0:04:35The colour, not so much, but, you know...

0:04:35 > 0:04:38Listen, we should say, Hugh Jackman, this year, this festive season,

0:04:38 > 0:04:41- you CAN enjoy yourself, you can pull the old ripcord...- Yeah.

0:04:41 > 0:04:43..cos you never have to be Wolverine again.

0:04:43 > 0:04:46That's it. 17 years I've been on a diet.

0:04:46 > 0:04:47You never need to look like...

0:04:47 > 0:04:51But having said that, like, won't you miss looking like that?

0:04:51 > 0:04:53- Erm... - WOLF WHISTLE FROM AUDIENCE

0:04:55 > 0:04:58Now... Now, yes!

0:04:58 > 0:05:00No. Like, people say to me,

0:05:00 > 0:05:02"How do I get ripped? How do I get like that?"

0:05:02 > 0:05:04And I'm, like, "Man, really,

0:05:04 > 0:05:07"it's too much effort for what it's worth."

0:05:07 > 0:05:12Like, it takes a lot, it's a lot of dedication, a lot of time,

0:05:12 > 0:05:15a lot of pain, a lot of steamed chicken and not much fun.

0:05:15 > 0:05:17Like, don't do it - it's not worth it.

0:05:17 > 0:05:19Yeah, it sucks, man.

0:05:19 > 0:05:23You can look seven and half out of ten and be so much happier.

0:05:24 > 0:05:26My wife is, like, "Enough!

0:05:26 > 0:05:28"Your job, as my husband, is to look like crap.

0:05:28 > 0:05:30"That is your job."

0:05:31 > 0:05:33Now, Zendaya, Zendaya, here's the thing -

0:05:33 > 0:05:35how old were you when you kind of

0:05:35 > 0:05:37started working professionally in the business?

0:05:37 > 0:05:42I think I was 13 when I got my first Disney Channel gig.

0:05:42 > 0:05:45- Yeah. And now you're in your early 20s now.- Yeah.

0:05:45 > 0:05:47- Was that your show, your first gig? - Yeah, that was my first thing.

0:05:47 > 0:05:51- KC Undercover?- It was Shake It Up, that was my first Disney show,

0:05:51 > 0:05:54- and that was, yeah, 13 years old. - Wow.- And it hasn't stopped.

0:05:54 > 0:05:56Is that younger than you, Zac? Or you were younger than that?

0:05:56 > 0:05:58I was... Yeah. You were 13 on Disney Channel?

0:05:58 > 0:06:00I was 13 on Disney Channel.

0:06:00 > 0:06:01Yeah, when I was 13, I was...

0:06:01 > 0:06:04..I think I was auditioning for my first play,

0:06:04 > 0:06:05like, local community theatre.

0:06:05 > 0:06:09My parents tricked me into auditioning for my first play.

0:06:09 > 0:06:11Told me we were going to Toys R Us.

0:06:11 > 0:06:13- You're kidding! They lied to you?- Yeah.

0:06:13 > 0:06:16And we've got a picture of you. Now, how old are you here?

0:06:19 > 0:06:22- I had to be, like, 13. - Is your hair crimped there?

0:06:22 > 0:06:23Yeah. It is, it is.

0:06:23 > 0:06:26Do you kind of put it an elastic band before you go to bed?

0:06:26 > 0:06:28How do you make your hair like that?

0:06:28 > 0:06:30I went to a performing arts school, and I'd lied about my age

0:06:30 > 0:06:34and said I was in high school when I wasn't.

0:06:35 > 0:06:38And I... There were a lot of older girls there

0:06:38 > 0:06:42that were just fun to hang out with, and they did that to me.

0:06:43 > 0:06:46- You were like their doll.- Yeah! I guess I was.

0:06:46 > 0:06:49We've got a picture of young Hugh Jackman.

0:06:49 > 0:06:53Can you see the boy who really wants to perform?

0:06:53 > 0:06:54Oh, no!

0:06:54 > 0:06:55LAUGHTER

0:06:58 > 0:07:00APPLAUSE

0:07:00 > 0:07:02That's like...

0:07:04 > 0:07:07Put me in, coach! Come on, coach, put me in!

0:07:08 > 0:07:11- I'm ready!- That is amazing!

0:07:11 > 0:07:14You are, like, totally focused on the camera.

0:07:14 > 0:07:16"Team? What team?"

0:07:16 > 0:07:19The opposition... The opposition were terrified.

0:07:19 > 0:07:21- They were intimidated.- Wow.

0:07:22 > 0:07:26The big movie you're here to tell us about is The Greatest Showman.

0:07:26 > 0:07:29It's showing everywhere now, and it really is a festive treat.

0:07:29 > 0:07:32It's a big musical extravaganza, telling the story of PT Barnum,

0:07:32 > 0:07:35who sort of originated what we think of as a circus.

0:07:35 > 0:07:38So, before we talk about it, here's a taste of what to expect.

0:07:40 > 0:07:42This is not the life I promised you.

0:07:42 > 0:07:44Not even close.

0:07:44 > 0:07:46But I have everything I want.

0:07:50 > 0:07:53Girls, I think I've had an idea.

0:07:53 > 0:07:55# Look out cos here I come... #

0:07:55 > 0:07:56I'm putting together a show.

0:07:56 > 0:08:00It's a place where people can see things they've never seen before!

0:08:00 > 0:08:03- Who's that?- And what is your act? - I don't have an act.

0:08:03 > 0:08:05Everyone's got an act.

0:08:05 > 0:08:08# So tell me do you wanna go?

0:08:08 > 0:08:12# Where it's covered in all the coloured lights?

0:08:12 > 0:08:15# Where the runaways are running the night?

0:08:15 > 0:08:18# Impossible comes through It's taking over you

0:08:18 > 0:08:20# Oh, this is the greatest show!

0:08:22 > 0:08:23# This is the greatest show! #

0:08:23 > 0:08:27No-one ever made a difference by being like everyone else.

0:08:27 > 0:08:29CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:08:32 > 0:08:36You know, Hugh Jackman, you play PT Barnum,

0:08:36 > 0:08:39and it's one of those things, where, like, the part and you,

0:08:39 > 0:08:41it's such a great fit.

0:08:41 > 0:08:43You seem to love being the showman.

0:08:43 > 0:08:46I was, seven and a half years ago, approached by...

0:08:46 > 0:08:48Yes, I do.

0:08:49 > 0:08:52Can I show you a shot of me playing soccer when I was six...

0:08:54 > 0:08:57I do kind of love it.

0:08:57 > 0:08:59I'm a ham, I'm a ham from way back,

0:08:59 > 0:09:02and somehow I feel really comfortable on a stage,

0:09:02 > 0:09:05I always have, and I was involved from the very beginning.

0:09:05 > 0:09:08So, if I'm not good in this part, I literally will never be good again,

0:09:08 > 0:09:11because it was a dream for me, for all of us.

0:09:11 > 0:09:13Well, Zac's done it four times before...

0:09:13 > 0:09:16But to be in a movie musical is a dream,

0:09:16 > 0:09:19- and it doesn't come along all that often.- Yeah.

0:09:19 > 0:09:22And so we spent seven years, we wanted to do something original,

0:09:22 > 0:09:25original music, and I think the music is phenomenal.

0:09:25 > 0:09:27And we wanted to tell the story of

0:09:27 > 0:09:30the guy who pretty much invented show business, so, this was it!

0:09:30 > 0:09:33And I love that story that you were so gung ho.

0:09:33 > 0:09:36Was it the first read-through, where you couldn't help yourself?

0:09:36 > 0:09:39It was at... It was the final read-through.

0:09:39 > 0:09:42So, we did four workshops over four years.

0:09:42 > 0:09:44So, the final read-through, there were about 80 people,

0:09:44 > 0:09:47and every single one of them with a cheque book in there.

0:09:47 > 0:09:50So it was will this or will it not happen?

0:09:50 > 0:09:51Based on this one performance.

0:09:51 > 0:09:55We had an eight-piece orchestra, we had everyone there performing,

0:09:55 > 0:10:01and the day before, I had had a skin cancer operation.

0:10:01 > 0:10:04So, I've had three or four of them, and I had to get it done.

0:10:04 > 0:10:07So I had 80 stitches in my nose and a plaster. I said,

0:10:07 > 0:10:10"Great, I'm back to rehearsal, I'm going to sing tomorrow.

0:10:10 > 0:10:13And the doctor's like, "No, no, no, you can't sing tomorrow."

0:10:13 > 0:10:15You know, because the stitches may come apart.

0:10:15 > 0:10:18And I said, "You don't understand - this is our make or break.

0:10:18 > 0:10:21"I've got to sing." And he goes, "You can't sing tomorrow."

0:10:21 > 0:10:24So I went in, made the announcement to everyone that I couldn't sing

0:10:24 > 0:10:26and someone was there to sing the songs for me.

0:10:26 > 0:10:29But when it came to From Now On, which is the last number,

0:10:29 > 0:10:32I was just so taken up by the moment, I thought,

0:10:32 > 0:10:34"I'll sing the first line."

0:10:34 > 0:10:37So, I sang the first line, I sang the second line,

0:10:37 > 0:10:39I sang the third line... and then I was singing!

0:10:39 > 0:10:41LAUGHTER

0:10:41 > 0:10:43With the soccer ball, right there!

0:10:45 > 0:10:48- And, yeah... - APPLAUSE

0:10:48 > 0:10:51So, I've finished the song.

0:10:51 > 0:10:54I mean, it was a pretty good showbiz moment.

0:10:54 > 0:10:58And I... Everyone seemed to be happy and I was like, "Great,"

0:10:58 > 0:11:01and I felt this trickle, and I went, "Uh-oh."

0:11:01 > 0:11:02And I went back to the doctor

0:11:02 > 0:11:05and had to have a bunch of those stitches redone.

0:11:05 > 0:11:08But worth it! Worth it!

0:11:08 > 0:11:10The show must go on!

0:11:10 > 0:11:13APPLAUSE DROWNS OUT SPEECH

0:11:13 > 0:11:16- So, you're PT Barnum.- Yeah. - And Zendaya...?

0:11:16 > 0:11:17I'm Anne Wheeler.

0:11:17 > 0:11:21I'm a trapeze artist who...falls in love with this guy.

0:11:21 > 0:11:23- Yeah...- Aw!

0:11:23 > 0:11:26I sort of play a made-up character. Phillip...

0:11:26 > 0:11:28LAUGHTER

0:11:28 > 0:11:31- Same.- Phillip...Carlyle?

0:11:31 > 0:11:35And...I'm, like, a writer, struggling, sort of very depressed,

0:11:35 > 0:11:39but successful and has a lot of money,

0:11:39 > 0:11:42that PT Barnum convinces me to come with him and sort of help him

0:11:42 > 0:11:45on his journey to show business.

0:11:45 > 0:11:46I want his money.

0:11:47 > 0:11:52And Zendaya...being bendy and doing the trapeze-y thing,

0:11:52 > 0:11:55was there a moment where, I think, you over-exerted yourself?

0:11:55 > 0:11:57Was it in front of Hugh?

0:11:57 > 0:11:59OK. See, here's what happened.

0:11:59 > 0:12:01Let me clear the air, literally.

0:12:01 > 0:12:04- So, here's the story. - "Literally"! Yeah.

0:12:04 > 0:12:05So, we're doing...

0:12:05 > 0:12:08I'm not going to name the person because that's embarrassing, OK?

0:12:08 > 0:12:11The point is, we were doing a stunt in front of Hugh Jackman.

0:12:11 > 0:12:13Now, I have very few scenes with Hugh Jackman,

0:12:13 > 0:12:15- and I was very nervous. - Was it me?!

0:12:15 > 0:12:17- It was not you.- No, it was not you.

0:12:17 > 0:12:20And I was on my, you know, my A game,

0:12:20 > 0:12:22cos this is Hugh Jackman and I do not want to mess up.

0:12:22 > 0:12:26So we're doing this thing where I'm basically up in the air

0:12:26 > 0:12:28and I spin down and I get caught,

0:12:28 > 0:12:29and I heard a fart.

0:12:29 > 0:12:30LAUGHTER

0:12:32 > 0:12:34- Now, wait!- We all heard the fart!

0:12:34 > 0:12:35We all heard the fart.

0:12:37 > 0:12:40Now...as a professional, I was going to carry on.

0:12:40 > 0:12:42It was not me!

0:12:42 > 0:12:45I just want to clarify, right here, right now, it was not me.

0:12:45 > 0:12:46So, they're laughing.

0:12:46 > 0:12:50The other person, OK, is laughing, and Hugh was laughing.

0:12:50 > 0:12:53I'm like, "OK, are we just going to, like, pretend that it didn't happen

0:12:53 > 0:12:55"or are we going to laugh about it?"

0:12:55 > 0:12:58And what happened was the person - who was a grown man -

0:12:58 > 0:13:01- blamed it on me!- Yeah.- Oh!

0:13:01 > 0:13:04- So Hugh thought that I farted! - HUGH MOUTHS

0:13:04 > 0:13:07But, the crazy... I would never do that!

0:13:07 > 0:13:10No-one thought that that was you, no-one.

0:13:10 > 0:13:13- No-one.- Listen, let me tell you something...- Yeah.

0:13:13 > 0:13:15..if I ever farted in front of you,

0:13:15 > 0:13:17it would definitely be silent but deadly.

0:13:17 > 0:13:20I would never...never audibly, never audibly.

0:13:20 > 0:13:22You know what I'm saying? I'm a lady.

0:13:22 > 0:13:24Memo to self. Memo to self.

0:13:24 > 0:13:26And tell me this, Zac, in terms of dancing and showmen,

0:13:26 > 0:13:29I know that Michael Jackson was a real hero of yours.

0:13:29 > 0:13:31- And...- Yeah...

0:13:31 > 0:13:35Now, you... Did you meet him? Or you didn't meet him?

0:13:35 > 0:13:38- There was...- No, no, I never... I talked to him on the phone.

0:13:38 > 0:13:40Yeah, so how did that happen?

0:13:40 > 0:13:42Uh, I... How did it happen?

0:13:42 > 0:13:46I was... I was in Paris, and I was with Kenny Ortega.

0:13:46 > 0:13:49We were promoting High School Musical 3, I want to say it was...

0:13:49 > 0:13:52I was probably 20... Maybe 20, 21 at the time,

0:13:52 > 0:13:57and we were at dinner, and somehow, I was at the head of the table

0:13:57 > 0:13:59and Kenny was on the other side of the table,

0:13:59 > 0:14:01our director, Kenny Ortega.

0:14:01 > 0:14:04And his phone rang, and I remember I got this look, like...

0:14:07 > 0:14:08"You want this phone call."

0:14:08 > 0:14:11And I was like, "OK," so I came over and was like, "What's going on?"

0:14:11 > 0:14:13- He goes... - WHISPERS:- "It's Michael Jackson."

0:14:13 > 0:14:16I'm like, "What?!" He hands me the phone, and I was like...

0:14:16 > 0:14:18"Uh...hello?"

0:14:18 > 0:14:21And I heard, "Hi, who's this?"

0:14:21 > 0:14:26And I was like... "Um, this is Zac Efron.

0:14:26 > 0:14:29"I'm a massive fan and I'm an actor

0:14:29 > 0:14:33"and you're, like, my hero," and I didn't know what to say.

0:14:33 > 0:14:39I was like, kind of... I was just at a loss for words and rambling on.

0:14:39 > 0:14:41And then he said, "That's really nice.

0:14:41 > 0:14:43"Can you hand the phone back to Kenny?"

0:14:43 > 0:14:45LAUGHTER

0:14:45 > 0:14:48So I did. And I was freaking out.

0:14:48 > 0:14:50Like, I just talked to Michael Jackson - he's my hero.

0:14:50 > 0:14:52I was tripping.

0:14:52 > 0:14:55And I sat back down, just a little dizzy, and then all of a sudden,

0:14:55 > 0:14:58the phone rang again, and Kenny answered,

0:14:58 > 0:15:01and I saw him kind of confused across the table.

0:15:01 > 0:15:04And he, like, looked at me again. He's like,

0:15:04 > 0:15:06"You want to get this phone."

0:15:06 > 0:15:09I was like, "OK." And he hands the phone to me and goes,

0:15:09 > 0:15:11"It's Michael Jackson again."

0:15:11 > 0:15:13And I was like, "What? OK."

0:15:13 > 0:15:16And I picked up the phone and I was like, "Hello?"

0:15:16 > 0:15:18He goes, "Oh, this is Zac, from High School Musical?"

0:15:18 > 0:15:20And I was like, "Uh...yeah."

0:15:20 > 0:15:24And he was like, "Oh, I love what you do, I'm a huge fan,

0:15:24 > 0:15:26"I love what you do."

0:15:26 > 0:15:30And I lost it. I just lost it.

0:15:30 > 0:15:33I lost my balance, I think I fell over, into the wall.

0:15:33 > 0:15:35I was like, do you know who I am?

0:15:35 > 0:15:38And I just started crying.

0:15:38 > 0:15:39I was a mess.

0:15:39 > 0:15:42Literally, I was making a fool out of myself.

0:15:42 > 0:15:45I, like, slid down to the floor, pathetically,

0:15:45 > 0:15:46and professed how much I loved him.

0:15:46 > 0:15:49Said, like, "You're my hero, you're the reason I do what I do,

0:15:49 > 0:15:52"thank you so much, Michael, for everything.

0:15:52 > 0:15:54"Thanks for showing me how to dance,

0:15:54 > 0:15:58"how to believe in myself, how to... how to..."

0:15:58 > 0:16:01I don't know, how to shine, you know?

0:16:01 > 0:16:03And...that made him cry.

0:16:05 > 0:16:07We were both crying to each other on the phone.

0:16:07 > 0:16:10And he ended the whole phone call conversation with

0:16:10 > 0:16:12something along the lines of,

0:16:12 > 0:16:15"Hey, Zac," and I stopped crying for a second,

0:16:15 > 0:16:18"Isn't it awesome?" I was like, "What?"

0:16:18 > 0:16:21And he goes, "Dreams really do come true, don't they?"

0:16:21 > 0:16:27And I was like... "Michael, you can't say things like that!

0:16:28 > 0:16:30"You're killing me, man! You're killing me!"

0:16:30 > 0:16:34- What a sweet story. - Thank you, Michael. Thank you.

0:16:39 > 0:16:42Now, in terms of circus, and the world of circus,

0:16:42 > 0:16:45oddly, Hugh Jackman, this isn't your first foray.

0:16:45 > 0:16:47You did some fine clown work.

0:16:47 > 0:16:50- I did.- Earlier in your life. - I was a clown at kids' parties.

0:16:50 > 0:16:55- I think we've got a picture of Coco. - There it is!- This is Coco.

0:16:57 > 0:16:59It's a rented costume.

0:16:59 > 0:17:02Coco and Bozo. We really put zero thought into this.

0:17:02 > 0:17:05But I could juggle at the time.

0:17:05 > 0:17:07And I was very good with the three-year-olds'

0:17:07 > 0:17:09and four-year-olds' party.

0:17:09 > 0:17:11- Cos you really just dress up and you're done.- Yeah, yeah.

0:17:11 > 0:17:13And I remember once getting a little cocky

0:17:13 > 0:17:16and I did an eight-year-old's birthday party.

0:17:16 > 0:17:20All you're hired to do is to keep the kids occupied for an hour.

0:17:20 > 0:17:22We've got some mums and dads here,

0:17:22 > 0:17:24so that mums and dads can drink, right? Am I right?

0:17:24 > 0:17:29About five minutes into my schtick, this little eight-year-old kid,

0:17:29 > 0:17:31who I hate to this day,

0:17:31 > 0:17:34stands up, "Mum, Dad,

0:17:34 > 0:17:36"this clown is crap!"

0:17:38 > 0:17:41Shut up! Shut up, kid!

0:17:41 > 0:17:44And I pull out the thing... I would juggle eggs,

0:17:44 > 0:17:47I could juggle eggs and occasionally I would crack one.

0:17:47 > 0:17:49So I just said, "Here, kids, eggs,"

0:17:49 > 0:17:52They were throwing eggs at me and I literally walked out,

0:17:52 > 0:17:56took off the wig, and I never went back again, that was it.

0:17:56 > 0:18:00- No more Coco.- Obviously, in things like The Prestige,

0:18:00 > 0:18:02- you had to learn special skills. - Right.

0:18:02 > 0:18:05- You can properly juggle, can't you? - I used to be able to juggle.

0:18:05 > 0:18:08Because tonight, because it's The Greatest Showman,

0:18:08 > 0:18:11we were thinking about people's skills, special skills, so...

0:18:11 > 0:18:15- Can you juggle those things?- Right!

0:18:17 > 0:18:20There's a selection of fruit. If you want to juggle a selection of fruit.

0:18:20 > 0:18:22- Shall we go oranges? - Go oranges.

0:18:22 > 0:18:23All right, we'll go oranges.

0:18:23 > 0:18:25Oh, you really can!

0:18:25 > 0:18:27AUDIENCE CHEER AND APPLAUD

0:18:29 > 0:18:32Oh, I caught one! I caught one!

0:18:34 > 0:18:35Same time.

0:18:35 > 0:18:36Oh!

0:18:36 > 0:18:38CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:18:44 > 0:18:45- Beautiful!- Health and safety!

0:18:47 > 0:18:51I turn now... I turn now to Zendaya.

0:18:51 > 0:18:54Now, you've got a physical thing you can do?

0:18:54 > 0:18:56- Oh, yeah.- Not the farting?- Oh, no.

0:18:56 > 0:18:58It wasn't me!

0:19:01 > 0:19:03- Tell me this...- It was not me!

0:19:03 > 0:19:08- But it was not me.- I'm really excited to find out.- Tell me this,

0:19:08 > 0:19:12Zendaya, in terms of the trapeze skills, do you still have them?

0:19:12 > 0:19:15If, for instance, if there was a trapeze,

0:19:15 > 0:19:20could you just slip your shoes off and get on a thing and just go nuts?

0:19:20 > 0:19:23You know... I didn't really wear my trapeze outfit today.

0:19:23 > 0:19:25The heels are a little difficult.

0:19:25 > 0:19:27Oh, OK!

0:19:27 > 0:19:30- Is that a no?- I mean... - Oh, is it a yes?

0:19:30 > 0:19:32Maybe... Maybe...

0:19:32 > 0:19:34CHEERING

0:19:38 > 0:19:41Listen, guys, I hate to let people down,

0:19:41 > 0:19:43but I don't have my stunt team here.

0:19:43 > 0:19:46- And I do not want to hurt myself. - We got you.

0:19:46 > 0:19:48You guys are going to...?

0:19:48 > 0:19:49- AUDIENCE:- Oh...

0:19:51 > 0:19:53Well, thank you very much.

0:19:54 > 0:19:56The only thing I can do is wiggle my ears.

0:19:56 > 0:19:58See, already we're thrilled!

0:19:58 > 0:20:01You're really doing it! Oh, she's doing it!

0:20:04 > 0:20:06That is impressive. Well done.

0:20:06 > 0:20:08APPLAUSE

0:20:08 > 0:20:10- That was good.- Thank you!

0:20:12 > 0:20:15Now, Zac, you've been very generous with your skills on the show,

0:20:15 > 0:20:17we've seen you controlling the ball

0:20:17 > 0:20:20and then you did the pole work the last time.

0:20:22 > 0:20:24- That was impressive.- We haven't turned that photograph.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26- He did that.- That's for real?- Yeah.

0:20:26 > 0:20:28My pole dance.

0:20:28 > 0:20:31Tonight, you bring us something very special.

0:20:31 > 0:20:34So, what special skill, what party trick have you brought for us?

0:20:34 > 0:20:37It's nothing at all.

0:20:37 > 0:20:41I couldn't do it. In fairness, I don't know what it is, but I...

0:20:43 > 0:20:47If it wasn't built up now, after that!

0:20:47 > 0:20:50My mom taught me how to blow like bubbles of spit.

0:20:50 > 0:20:53Now we're talking!

0:20:53 > 0:20:58So, now, because I'm not sure, so I don't know how well this will go.

0:20:58 > 0:21:02If it was to go as well as possible, what should we expect to see?

0:21:02 > 0:21:04Things are happening.

0:21:04 > 0:21:09- I can see it!- Your spit has to be just the right consistency.

0:21:09 > 0:21:13My mom taught me how to do this. She's going to be so embarrassed.

0:21:19 > 0:21:21Here we go, here we go, here we go. This is it. This is it.

0:21:25 > 0:21:27I saw it, I saw it!

0:21:27 > 0:21:30- I can form one. Last try?- Yeah.

0:21:35 > 0:21:38Honestly, I can't do it. Your spit has to be just right.

0:21:38 > 0:21:40I don't know what you have to eat.

0:21:40 > 0:21:43Mom... I wish my mom was around.

0:21:43 > 0:21:45- It's OK, man.- Well, frickin' A!

0:21:50 > 0:21:53OK, we've been let down by spitball.

0:21:54 > 0:21:57Will you have one more go with your spitball? One more go.

0:21:58 > 0:22:00Oh, I saw that one!

0:22:00 > 0:22:02Oh... Oh...

0:22:02 > 0:22:03Oh, you're on a roll.

0:22:07 > 0:22:12- Oh! Yay!- We've got a spitball!

0:22:13 > 0:22:17- OK, you did it, you did it, Zac Efron!- Yes!

0:22:17 > 0:22:21So, let's just see if our audience tonight have any talents.

0:22:21 > 0:22:24We asked what skills they have to offer us tonight.

0:22:24 > 0:22:27I've got some of their answers here.

0:22:29 > 0:22:31Where's Lucy?

0:22:31 > 0:22:34Where's Lucy? Now, Lucy, I don't understand your thing.

0:22:34 > 0:22:37So, you can do Eggy Peggy language?

0:22:37 > 0:22:42- Yeah.- OK, so how do we demonstrate this?

0:22:42 > 0:22:46- So I can translate anything into Eggy Peggy.- Just a phrase?

0:22:46 > 0:22:49- Any phrase. In any language. - Hugh Jackman, do you have a phrase

0:22:49 > 0:22:52you would like to hear in Eggy Peggy? I know no more than you.

0:22:53 > 0:22:57Zendaya never farted on the set of The Greatest Showman.

0:22:57 > 0:23:04SHE TRANSLATES TO EGGY PEGGY

0:23:04 > 0:23:06CHEERING

0:23:06 > 0:23:09I don't know whether that was good or not.

0:23:09 > 0:23:11It's good.

0:23:11 > 0:23:13Where's Ash? Where's Ash?

0:23:13 > 0:23:14Ash, what can you do?

0:23:14 > 0:23:17- Spin on my head. - You're the spin-on-the-head guy.

0:23:17 > 0:23:20OK, that's very good. Hang on. We might see you later.

0:23:20 > 0:23:23We won't see it right now. That's Ash, who can spin on his head.

0:23:23 > 0:23:25Where is Tora?

0:23:25 > 0:23:27Now, Tora does an impression.

0:23:27 > 0:23:29You just do the one, right?

0:23:29 > 0:23:31- No.- Yes. Ssh!

0:23:31 > 0:23:33- Is there more?- Yes.

0:23:33 > 0:23:35I love gabby friend there.

0:23:35 > 0:23:36How many...?

0:23:36 > 0:23:38What else can Tora do?

0:23:38 > 0:23:40- FRIEND:- Tell them.- Well...

0:23:40 > 0:23:42I used to be able to do the Queen.

0:23:42 > 0:23:46- What happened?- Well, she got older, and I can't do her any more.

0:23:48 > 0:23:50So, what are you going to give us?

0:23:50 > 0:23:52I'm going to give Sybil Fawlty.

0:23:52 > 0:23:55- Oh, Fawlty Towers, OK.- I love that!

0:23:55 > 0:23:58So, Tora is Sybil Fawlty from Fawlty Towers.

0:23:58 > 0:24:01- AS SYBIL:- Polly, would you get Manuel for me?

0:24:01 > 0:24:03That was very good!

0:24:08 > 0:24:11Now, Mike, where's Mike?

0:24:11 > 0:24:14Now, Mike might be a good companion trick for your moving ears.

0:24:14 > 0:24:21- Oh, OK.- Mike can, it says here, "uniquely fold his tongue".

0:24:21 > 0:24:23- Oh!- OK.

0:24:23 > 0:24:25Nice and close to Mike's mouth.

0:24:25 > 0:24:27OK. And here we go.

0:24:27 > 0:24:31Mike folding his... Oh, he's having some problems.

0:24:31 > 0:24:33Oh, no, are they your own teeth?

0:24:33 > 0:24:34They are.

0:24:39 > 0:24:41Don't get sick, Mike!

0:24:43 > 0:24:46- Sorry.- Not yet.- Not yet.- OK.

0:24:46 > 0:24:49No, in fairness, professionals are having trouble.

0:24:51 > 0:24:55- Don't attempt any trick with your tongue on this show.- No.

0:24:55 > 0:24:57I do a mean Wolverine.

0:24:59 > 0:25:00Let's see your mean Wolverine then!

0:25:04 > 0:25:08That's good. Who knew that was coming?

0:25:08 > 0:25:13Ah, well done, all the talented people in our audience, very good.

0:25:15 > 0:25:17- Why didn't I think of that?- I know!

0:25:20 > 0:25:25- No, he had that ends of his fingers going, man.- He was good.

0:25:25 > 0:25:29Hey, let's meet my next guest. We first met this Bafta-winning actress

0:25:29 > 0:25:32on Coronation Street, then as one half of Scott & Bailey

0:25:32 > 0:25:35but she truly gripped the nation in the monster hit Doctor Foster.

0:25:35 > 0:25:37Please welcome Suranne Jones!

0:25:40 > 0:25:44Hey. Hello, darling, lovely to see you.

0:25:53 > 0:25:56Have a seat. More kissing, more kissing.

0:25:56 > 0:25:58It's so showbiz.

0:25:58 > 0:26:00- Happy New Year.- Happy New Year.

0:26:00 > 0:26:02Or eve, or something, whatever it is.

0:26:02 > 0:26:05Mike's making me a bit nervous with the tongue thing.

0:26:07 > 0:26:10- I'm not sure what that was. - Not sure if it's special.- What?

0:26:10 > 0:26:12Is that special, folding your tongue back?

0:26:12 > 0:26:14He looked a bit like a dog that had had peanut butter.

0:26:18 > 0:26:21- Um...- Could have led with the Wolverine, Mike.

0:26:21 > 0:26:25- Lead with that, that's the one. - So, Suranne, did you meet backstage?

0:26:25 > 0:26:27- No, you weren't back here. - No, no.- No.

0:26:27 > 0:26:29We tried but she wouldn't see anyone.

0:26:29 > 0:26:31- I don't know. - No, I was too nervous.

0:26:31 > 0:26:32I get very nervous before I come on

0:26:32 > 0:26:34- so I was kind of hiding somewhere. - Do you?

0:26:34 > 0:26:37- We have met before.- I know, we met in Broadway at the River.

0:26:37 > 0:26:39- Yeah.- Oh, good memory.

0:26:39 > 0:26:42Yeah. With my husband as well.

0:26:42 > 0:26:44Is this mean of me?

0:26:45 > 0:26:48Yes, cos it was the dressing room and my friend Kush.

0:26:48 > 0:26:51This might be mean of me, but... cos people, you know,

0:26:51 > 0:26:54we give interviews, people ask us stupid questions, we answer them,

0:26:54 > 0:26:57da-da-da, so, in 2013

0:26:57 > 0:26:59do you remember you were asked in a questionnaire

0:26:59 > 0:27:01what your greatest weakness was?

0:27:05 > 0:27:08If I wasn't sat next to Hugh Jackman...

0:27:09 > 0:27:12- ..I would answer you, but you're going to say it anyway.- I am, yes.

0:27:12 > 0:27:14You said coffee and Hugh Jackman.

0:27:18 > 0:27:20In that order?

0:27:25 > 0:27:26The things you say.

0:27:26 > 0:27:29Are you also kind of like, "What are the chances?"

0:27:29 > 0:27:35- Now look!- But then I went on to marry someone who also loves you,

0:27:35 > 0:27:38and, when we met, he was winding me up before we met,

0:27:38 > 0:27:41and he was getting knives

0:27:41 > 0:27:45and putting them on his hands and saying, "When I meet Hugh,

0:27:45 > 0:27:48"I am going to do this," cos he loves Wolverine.

0:27:48 > 0:27:51And we had a massive argument cos I said why would you do that,

0:27:51 > 0:27:55why can't you say you were great in the play, nice to meet you?

0:27:55 > 0:27:58Why would you do...? Why would you get knives out?

0:27:59 > 0:28:00And embarrass me?

0:28:00 > 0:28:04And then we met, and my husband didn't say boo to a goose,

0:28:04 > 0:28:07stood in a corner and we went, "Hi, how are you?"

0:28:08 > 0:28:12And then was so disappointed that you weren't like Wolverine, so...

0:28:12 > 0:28:15- Oh, really.- Yeah.- Oh. I'm going to send Mike over.

0:28:15 > 0:28:19- Yes, yes.- Mike's better.- Sorry, Laurence.- Now here's a thing.

0:28:19 > 0:28:22I think it's extraordinary because you walk out

0:28:22 > 0:28:24to that mighty roar and you, as an actress,

0:28:24 > 0:28:26you were in the most popular show in Britain,

0:28:26 > 0:28:28you were in Coronation Street, then Scott & Bailey,

0:28:28 > 0:28:31everyone loved that, but Doctor Foster, you must have thought,

0:28:31 > 0:28:34I'm really famous, and then Doctor Foster came along.

0:28:34 > 0:28:35I know, it's just gone mental.

0:28:35 > 0:28:38- Yeah.- I've not done a show where people have just been behind it.

0:28:38 > 0:28:41And also cos you couldn't binge watch it,

0:28:41 > 0:28:45you had to watch it once a week, it had that kind of watercooler cooler effect.

0:28:45 > 0:28:48And, you know, for a character that was quite mental at times,

0:28:48 > 0:28:52- especially in season two...- Yes. - ..yeah, people loved it.

0:28:52 > 0:28:55But also it was quite graphic.

0:28:55 > 0:29:00So, that must have been odd for you, then, just Suranne Jones,

0:29:00 > 0:29:03- doing your shopping.- I remember, well, I've told you this before.

0:29:03 > 0:29:06But I was in the woods with my two-year-old,

0:29:06 > 0:29:10nearly two-year-old and I'd done this big hate sex scene

0:29:10 > 0:29:15where there was lots of things going on in the kitchen.

0:29:15 > 0:29:17- And, um...- I love that.

0:29:17 > 0:29:20- The old hate sex scene.- Yeah.

0:29:20 > 0:29:22I hope they wiped down the surfaces after that

0:29:22 > 0:29:25because it needed a good Dettoling.

0:29:26 > 0:29:29And, you know, you do these scenes and you're just kind of, like...

0:29:29 > 0:29:32and I'm with my son and my son just wants to

0:29:32 > 0:29:35pick up sticks or sing songs with me in the woods,

0:29:35 > 0:29:37and then people come past, saying,

0:29:37 > 0:29:41"Ooh! Saw you last night in that scene, that was quite some..."

0:29:41 > 0:29:44And I'm like, "Yeah, like, not now."

0:29:44 > 0:29:46Not, not appropriate.

0:29:46 > 0:29:50I'm singing, "Ooh, this little piggy went to market."

0:29:52 > 0:29:54Yeah, literally.

0:29:59 > 0:30:01Talking to you, you are not resting,

0:30:01 > 0:30:04you are not resting cos you're straight back to work presumably

0:30:04 > 0:30:07in the New Year in rehearsals, a new play, it's called Frozen.

0:30:07 > 0:30:09Not the Disney version, yes.

0:30:09 > 0:30:13No. I think that poster's good enough to avoid confusion.

0:30:13 > 0:30:17- Yeah, I'm not in a fancy dress outfit, yeah.- Where's Olaf?

0:30:20 > 0:30:22It starts on 21st February,

0:30:22 > 0:30:25it's at the Theatre Royal Haymarket in London and it's, not just you,

0:30:25 > 0:30:30it's a really starry cast. It's Jason Watkins and Nina Sosanya.

0:30:30 > 0:30:34- Sosanya, yes. - Oddly, they're both in W1A together.

0:30:34 > 0:30:37I know, which is a comedy, and again ours isn't really a comedy.

0:30:37 > 0:30:39No, this sounds quite...

0:30:39 > 0:30:42- Yeah.- Yeah, it's a psychological thriller, a three-hander,

0:30:42 > 0:30:46and it's about a woman who loses her child, her child goes missing.

0:30:46 > 0:30:50And then she gets the opportunity to meet the person

0:30:50 > 0:30:53that was responsible for that.

0:30:53 > 0:30:58And I read somewhere where how you feel, because you're a newish mom,

0:30:58 > 0:31:01that that has kind of affected your brain when you read

0:31:01 > 0:31:05a script like this, kind of a different switch has been flicked.

0:31:05 > 0:31:08Do you know, I don't know how you guys feel,

0:31:08 > 0:31:11but when I became a mum or I was pregnant,

0:31:11 > 0:31:14I was attracted by, like, missing children.

0:31:14 > 0:31:17Because I've done three, like Doctor Foster,

0:31:17 > 0:31:20and then I'm in a Sky Atlantic thing called Save Me

0:31:20 > 0:31:23and that's about a missing child and Frozen is about missing...

0:31:23 > 0:31:25So I must have been in a headspace

0:31:25 > 0:31:27where it was like the total opposite to what...

0:31:27 > 0:31:29I was so happy in my marriage

0:31:29 > 0:31:33and having a new baby that I was drawn to these really dark stories.

0:31:33 > 0:31:38I mean, it does stop after this one! I'm not... But it's weird...

0:31:38 > 0:31:40I wonder what happens in this Suranne Jones project.

0:31:40 > 0:31:42Another child goes missing, yeah.

0:31:42 > 0:31:44She's got a kid. Not for long.

0:31:49 > 0:31:52But now Coronation Street. How long were you in Coronation Street?

0:31:52 > 0:31:55- Four years.- Four years. Presumably, do you have any clue...

0:31:55 > 0:31:58Oh, Hugh Jackman knows what it is. Zendaya, Zac? No.

0:31:58 > 0:32:00I've heard of it, yes, yeah.

0:32:00 > 0:32:02Because you were, you know,

0:32:02 > 0:32:06that's a huge deal to get a gig in Coronation Street.

0:32:06 > 0:32:09Oh, God. I mean, you know, I'm northern working-class,

0:32:09 > 0:32:12all my family just loved Coronation Street.

0:32:12 > 0:32:16And I used to audition all the time, like, almost every week,

0:32:16 > 0:32:18because this theatre school that I went to,

0:32:18 > 0:32:20they'd just get all the kids in to audition all the time.

0:32:20 > 0:32:22And they were trying to find a part for me.

0:32:22 > 0:32:26And, yeah, my nana Bertha and my grandad Bob were like,

0:32:26 > 0:32:30you know, Spielberg, Coronation Street. "Ooh, Coronation Street!"

0:32:30 > 0:32:34There's no comparison. And then of course I got it.

0:32:34 > 0:32:36- And...- It's been all downhill since then!

0:32:36 > 0:32:39- Would you not go back?- Yes, exactly.

0:32:39 > 0:32:42Because Karen McDonald, she loved a good ruck, Karen McDonald.

0:32:42 > 0:32:44- She did. Yes.- Lots of it. A lot of them with her husband Steve.

0:32:44 > 0:32:46Look at that, look at that vicious face there.

0:32:46 > 0:32:50- Oh, God.- Er, then some of them in the pub, I'm guessing

0:32:50 > 0:32:52- this is St Patrick's Day.- Oh, God!

0:32:52 > 0:32:56That's a good fight. Now, sadly, no-one told her she was in shot.

0:32:59 > 0:33:02She's just planning her menu for dinner.

0:33:02 > 0:33:06She's like, "I've got carrots in, I could do something with them..."

0:33:07 > 0:33:11And then, this, of course was the big final fight.

0:33:11 > 0:33:14Was it that you weren't supposed to be doing this, were you?

0:33:14 > 0:33:16No, my... Eunice...

0:33:16 > 0:33:19These soaps are serious business.

0:33:19 > 0:33:20No kidding around, yeah.

0:33:20 > 0:33:24My stunt double, Eunice, she was meant to be doing that,

0:33:24 > 0:33:27and then a car ran over her ankle.

0:33:28 > 0:33:31So she got sent off, and the ambulance turned up

0:33:31 > 0:33:32and we were all in the green room

0:33:32 > 0:33:36and of course they should have sent us all home, but being budget

0:33:36 > 0:33:38and all that, they said, "Oh, Eunice has gone to hospital,

0:33:38 > 0:33:42"and she can't do the stunt now so...can you do it?"

0:33:43 > 0:33:46- And of course I'm 22.- You're nearly finished.- You're nearly finished.

0:33:46 > 0:33:48I'm 22 and I think, I'm going to get the sack if I don't.

0:33:48 > 0:33:51So I went, "Yeah, what have I got to do?" And they said,

0:33:51 > 0:33:53"We're just going to hang you over the building.

0:33:53 > 0:33:56"And Tracy's going to smash you with a log."

0:33:59 > 0:34:03- And I said, "OK." - Is this a hate sex scene?

0:34:03 > 0:34:05No, no, this is different.

0:34:05 > 0:34:09- I love that Tracy just found a log. - I know.

0:34:09 > 0:34:13- In the knicker factory.- Oh, this log that's in the knicker factory.

0:34:13 > 0:34:15It's very Game Of Thrones.

0:34:17 > 0:34:20Now, tonight we're collecting people's special skills.

0:34:20 > 0:34:21We've seen some marvellous skills.

0:34:21 > 0:34:24- Yes.- So, what might you delight...

0:34:24 > 0:34:27If we were at a party, what would you delight people with?

0:34:27 > 0:34:33I... I... I haven't done it for a long time, but I used to, um,

0:34:33 > 0:34:36- do a velociraptor impression.- Oh!

0:34:38 > 0:34:40She is pissing on you all.

0:34:41 > 0:34:44- We haven't seen it yet.- That level. - We haven't seen it yet...

0:34:44 > 0:34:47- Exactly.- But, OK, do you need anything for this?

0:34:47 > 0:34:50- Um, maybe these shoes off. - OK. Do you need help with that?

0:34:50 > 0:34:53No, no, I can get them off.

0:34:53 > 0:34:54You know the famous scene

0:34:54 > 0:34:57where the velociraptor is looking for the children,

0:34:57 > 0:34:59in the kitchens.

0:34:59 > 0:35:01Oh, yes, I do know, yes.

0:35:01 > 0:35:03I kind of re-enact that.

0:35:03 > 0:35:06Be kind to me, imagine there's some children that I'm running after

0:35:06 > 0:35:08and they're all scared. Usually I'm doing that at a party

0:35:08 > 0:35:11- and there's lots of kids.- OK. Do you need to jump on a table or anything?

0:35:11 > 0:35:13No, I just need a bit of space, this is good.

0:35:13 > 0:35:17OK. She's an actress, just explore the space.

0:35:17 > 0:35:18Explore the space.

0:35:18 > 0:35:20- Yes, good.- Oh, she's happy, she's happy.

0:35:20 > 0:35:22Shall I get out of the way?

0:35:22 > 0:35:24- I'm OK here?- No, cos you can be a part of this.- OK, OK.

0:35:24 > 0:35:26We've got a little bit of music,

0:35:26 > 0:35:28- a little bit of music. - Goodbye, career!

0:35:28 > 0:35:30LAUGHTER

0:35:45 > 0:35:47Very good!

0:35:49 > 0:35:51Excellent.

0:35:52 > 0:35:56Right. Time for our final New Year guest.

0:35:56 > 0:36:00This man has been a Hollywood star for over 30 years and now gives

0:36:00 > 0:36:03a career-defining performance as the great Winston Churchill

0:36:03 > 0:36:05in Darkest Hour. I smell Oscars.

0:36:05 > 0:36:08Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Gary Oldman!

0:36:10 > 0:36:12Oh! So good to see you.

0:36:12 > 0:36:15- Hello, Sir.- How are you? Are you well?

0:36:25 > 0:36:28Come in, sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down. Well done.

0:36:28 > 0:36:31Double congratulations to Gary Oldman.

0:36:31 > 0:36:33Not only are you getting amazing reviews

0:36:33 > 0:36:35but you've also just got married.

0:36:35 > 0:36:37- I did get married.- Yes!

0:36:37 > 0:36:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:36:41 > 0:36:44I got married in August.

0:36:44 > 0:36:49And I proposed to my wife Gisele

0:36:49 > 0:36:53on the set of Darkest Hour

0:36:53 > 0:36:57so I was...I was dressed as Winston Churchill when I did it.

0:36:59 > 0:37:01- HUGH:- That's hot.

0:37:02 > 0:37:05- Well, if she said yes to that... - She said yes.

0:37:05 > 0:37:09And it was, um, we had talked about it, but I don't know,

0:37:09 > 0:37:13the urge took me, and we went into the Map Room

0:37:13 > 0:37:16in the, you know, the War Rooms,

0:37:16 > 0:37:17we went into the Map Room.

0:37:17 > 0:37:19And I said, "Will you marry me?" and she said, "Yes."

0:37:19 > 0:37:22And then someone said, "Gary, we need you on the set."

0:37:22 > 0:37:24LAUGHTER

0:37:24 > 0:37:26APPLAUSE

0:37:26 > 0:37:29Now, we were talking about musicals obviously tonight,

0:37:29 > 0:37:32with The Greatest Showman. And I did not realise, Gary Oldman,

0:37:32 > 0:37:34that one of your first jobs,

0:37:34 > 0:37:36you were in Cabaret, the musical Cabaret.

0:37:36 > 0:37:38Yeah. Yeah.

0:37:38 > 0:37:41But it wasn't plain sailing.

0:37:41 > 0:37:45No. Well, you all know this.

0:37:45 > 0:37:48The outgoing song I had,

0:37:48 > 0:37:51a cappella, five-part harmony,

0:37:51 > 0:37:55and the outgoing song's last note

0:37:55 > 0:37:57is my starting note

0:37:57 > 0:38:00and I would take it from the piano,

0:38:00 > 0:38:02and I would be backstage,

0:38:02 > 0:38:05hear the note, come out, set up,

0:38:05 > 0:38:08the lights would come up and I would start singing.

0:38:08 > 0:38:14And these five Boy Scouts were all around the campfire thing.

0:38:14 > 0:38:17And, um... And I, on one night,

0:38:17 > 0:38:20only one night, thank heavens,

0:38:20 > 0:38:23but instead of taking the note from the piano,

0:38:23 > 0:38:27the trumpet in the band,

0:38:27 > 0:38:29the trumpet drowned it out.

0:38:29 > 0:38:34So, I took the note from the trumpet, which is the same note,

0:38:34 > 0:38:37but it's impure, it's not the same as the piano.

0:38:37 > 0:38:40And I get the note in my head,

0:38:40 > 0:38:42come out and I start singing

0:38:42 > 0:38:46- and I realised I've started an octave too high.- Oh, no...!

0:38:47 > 0:38:51And... And then it goes up a tone.

0:38:52 > 0:38:54You know the song I'm talking about, do you? Yeah.

0:38:54 > 0:38:57# The sun on the meadow... #

0:38:57 > 0:39:00Back in the day, I could.

0:39:00 > 0:39:01I was only 20.

0:39:01 > 0:39:04So, I started singing

0:39:04 > 0:39:05and suddenly realised,

0:39:05 > 0:39:08"Oh, my God,

0:39:08 > 0:39:10"I'm so... I'm so off!"

0:39:10 > 0:39:14And then it went up another tone,

0:39:14 > 0:39:19there's these five guys who had, by then, stopped harmonising.

0:39:21 > 0:39:22And were just going...

0:39:22 > 0:39:24CHUCKLING

0:39:24 > 0:39:29That thing of I'm there singing with veins popping out of my neck,

0:39:29 > 0:39:31and these five...

0:39:31 > 0:39:35Just five backs to the audience, just doing this...

0:39:35 > 0:39:37But you've... I mean, you've...

0:39:37 > 0:39:40I remember, I was in an amateur production of West Side Story,

0:39:40 > 0:39:43in the eastern suburbs of Sydney,

0:39:43 > 0:39:45and I had the role of Tony.

0:39:45 > 0:39:47And it's a very high tenor role,

0:39:47 > 0:39:48and I'm a baritone, high baritone.

0:39:48 > 0:39:50At the time, I could not sing those notes.

0:39:50 > 0:39:52And I said, "Guys I can't sing the notes." "You'll be fine."

0:39:52 > 0:39:55I said, "But I can't sing it." "You'll be fine."

0:39:55 > 0:39:56And every night, I would go out there...

0:39:56 > 0:39:59Every night! There were three performances! Every night...

0:39:59 > 0:40:02LAUGHTER

0:40:02 > 0:40:03..I went out there,

0:40:03 > 0:40:06# Maria, Maria, Mari... #

0:40:07 > 0:40:09LAUGHTER

0:40:09 > 0:40:11And I would go...

0:40:11 > 0:40:14Pointing to the sound guy in the wings,

0:40:14 > 0:40:16"You've let me down, the mic."

0:40:16 > 0:40:19Every night, the sound guy in the wings is like...

0:40:19 > 0:40:22LAUGHTER

0:40:22 > 0:40:23I couldn't take it.

0:40:23 > 0:40:26APPLAUSE

0:40:26 > 0:40:27The movie, Darkest Hour.

0:40:27 > 0:40:30Fantastic reviews, Joe Wright directed.

0:40:30 > 0:40:33It opens here on the 12th January

0:40:33 > 0:40:36and it's a very specific time in the war for Winston Churchill.

0:40:36 > 0:40:40Yeah. Yeah. It's really five or six weeks, 1940.

0:40:40 > 0:40:46Neville Chamberlain has resigned from the premiership.

0:40:46 > 0:40:49Churchill steps in.

0:40:49 > 0:40:54Um, there are troops in Dunkirk

0:40:54 > 0:40:57which, you know, there's fear that we'll lose.

0:40:57 > 0:41:00300... In fact, 300,000 soldiers in Dunkirk.

0:41:00 > 0:41:05And also, on the table,

0:41:05 > 0:41:08is a peace deal with Hitler.

0:41:08 > 0:41:13And it deals with not only the crisis in Dunkirk,

0:41:13 > 0:41:19but whether we will capitulate and, um...

0:41:19 > 0:41:23basically, surrender, and do a deal with Hitler.

0:41:23 > 0:41:28So, it's a very specific, a very defining moment...

0:41:28 > 0:41:30- A sort of pivotal moment, yeah. - ..in our history,

0:41:30 > 0:41:32and also in Churchill's career.

0:41:32 > 0:41:35We'll talk about it some more, but let's show people

0:41:35 > 0:41:39- just a bit of your transformation into Winston Churchill.- Yes.

0:41:39 > 0:41:42Nothing inglorious in trying to shorten a war

0:41:42 > 0:41:44- that we are clearly losing. - "Losing"?

0:41:44 > 0:41:46- Europe is still... - HE BANGS ON DESK

0:41:46 > 0:41:48Europe is lost!

0:41:54 > 0:41:58And before our forces are wiped out completely,

0:41:58 > 0:42:00now's the time to negotiate

0:42:00 > 0:42:03in order to obtain the best conditions possible.

0:42:05 > 0:42:07Hitler will not insist on outrageous terms.

0:42:07 > 0:42:09He will know his own weaknesses.

0:42:09 > 0:42:12- He will be reasonable. - When will the lesson be learned?

0:42:12 > 0:42:15When will the lesson be learned?!

0:42:16 > 0:42:18How many more dictators

0:42:18 > 0:42:22must be wooed, appeased!

0:42:22 > 0:42:25Good God, given immense privileges, before we learn

0:42:25 > 0:42:28you cannot reason with a tiger

0:42:28 > 0:42:32- when your head is in its mouth! - CHAIR SCRAPES AND THUDS

0:42:32 > 0:42:34APPLAUSE

0:42:37 > 0:42:41It is amazing. It is amazing.

0:42:41 > 0:42:43And it's...

0:42:43 > 0:42:46It's one of the things, cos often, in things like this,

0:42:46 > 0:42:48the make-up, the wigs, can get in the way.

0:42:48 > 0:42:50- Yeah.- And it's beautiful.

0:42:50 > 0:42:52Well, I think it's...

0:42:52 > 0:42:55I would say it's a benchmark in prosthetic make-up.

0:42:55 > 0:42:57And would it take hours or...?

0:42:57 > 0:42:59The whole thing took four hours.

0:42:59 > 0:43:02OK. So, it's the face, it's the fat suit...

0:43:02 > 0:43:06And the clothes, and, er...

0:43:06 > 0:43:08But the attention to detail -

0:43:08 > 0:43:12the cigars, you chose the special cigars.

0:43:12 > 0:43:14Well, I did, and I used to smoke.

0:43:14 > 0:43:15I don't smoke any more

0:43:15 > 0:43:20and I got nicotine poisoning because I was on about 12 a day.

0:43:20 > 0:43:26I went through 30,000 of cigars on the sets...

0:43:27 > 0:43:29- That's crazy.- I mean...

0:43:29 > 0:43:33- How much are cigars?!- They're 50 quid a pop.- You're kidding!

0:43:33 > 0:43:37And I would do about 12 of them a day, so I got nicotine...

0:43:37 > 0:43:40I basically had a bad stomach

0:43:40 > 0:43:43for the three months I was on the show.

0:43:43 > 0:43:44We had a Christmas break

0:43:44 > 0:43:47and everybody went off and decorated their Christmas trees

0:43:47 > 0:43:50and went out shopping. I went and had a colonoscopy.

0:43:50 > 0:43:53LAUGHTER

0:43:55 > 0:43:58For the man who has everything!

0:43:59 > 0:44:02That was my Christmas present!

0:44:02 > 0:44:04So, you felt sick every day pretty much, then?

0:44:04 > 0:44:06Yeah, just...just it was...

0:44:06 > 0:44:08It was just... It was...

0:44:08 > 0:44:14I think it was the compression in the suit, dehydration, the cigars,

0:44:14 > 0:44:17it was a good... It's a price to pay, but...

0:44:17 > 0:44:20Can I just say something, cos I really admired what you said

0:44:20 > 0:44:23about Michael Jackson. I would never forgive myself, Gary,

0:44:23 > 0:44:26if I don't tell you you are one of the greatest actors

0:44:26 > 0:44:29- to have ever lived. You're one of my inspirations.- Oh!

0:44:29 > 0:44:31CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:44:31 > 0:44:33- ZAC:- I second that, absolutely.

0:44:33 > 0:44:35I mean it.

0:44:38 > 0:44:40If you have not seen Darkest Hour,

0:44:40 > 0:44:43you will see one of the greatest actors alive

0:44:43 > 0:44:45give one of their greatest performances

0:44:45 > 0:44:47of one of the great British characters of all time.

0:44:47 > 0:44:49- It is astonishing. - Thank you so much.

0:44:49 > 0:44:51APPLAUSE

0:44:51 > 0:44:53That means a great deal coming from you.

0:44:56 > 0:45:00We've got a selection of special skills on the show tonight,

0:45:00 > 0:45:02and, Gary, you've brought us a real treat.

0:45:02 > 0:45:05Am I right to say, it's something physical.

0:45:05 > 0:45:07- Yes, it's physical.- It's physical.

0:45:07 > 0:45:09I don't know if it's very special!

0:45:09 > 0:45:12Do you want to tell us what we're going to watch

0:45:12 > 0:45:14or shall we just see it?

0:45:14 > 0:45:18Er, it's... Well, yes, it's...

0:45:18 > 0:45:22My wife actually recorded it on an iPhone in the trailer

0:45:22 > 0:45:26and it's Winston Churchill doing James Brown.

0:45:26 > 0:45:28HE GASPS This sounds special.

0:45:28 > 0:45:31- It's a new level. - So, here is Winston Churchill.

0:45:31 > 0:45:33This has so many layers!

0:45:33 > 0:45:34This is so meta now.

0:45:34 > 0:45:38It's Gary Oldman does Winston Churchill doing James Brown.

0:45:38 > 0:45:39For the Oscar.

0:45:39 > 0:45:42SOUL MUSIC PLAYS

0:45:42 > 0:45:44LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:45:55 > 0:45:57Very good!

0:45:57 > 0:45:59CHEERING

0:46:02 > 0:46:04Excellent!

0:46:04 > 0:46:07Now, we're about to have our musical performance.

0:46:07 > 0:46:09I know, another one!

0:46:09 > 0:46:13But before we do, Hugh, I wonder, could you channel,

0:46:13 > 0:46:15channel your best PT Barnum.

0:46:15 > 0:46:19- Right.- And give us a sort of recap of some of the talented...

0:46:19 > 0:46:22talented people we've met tonight?

0:46:22 > 0:46:25We've got you a top hat and a cane, wherever they are.

0:46:25 > 0:46:27Oh, here they are. Top hat and a cane.

0:46:27 > 0:46:29So, if you go to, kind of, the central ring.

0:46:29 > 0:46:31- You've got it.- You've got it!

0:46:31 > 0:46:34- If you go into here.- Yes.- OK.

0:46:34 > 0:46:38And, you know, do any twirly, caney business, if you want to.

0:46:38 > 0:46:39It's a great hat! Thanks, Graham!

0:46:39 > 0:46:43- LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE - A good start.

0:46:45 > 0:46:48Ladies and gentlemen. Oh, here we go.

0:46:48 > 0:46:49Where are we? Ladies and gentlemen,

0:46:49 > 0:46:52it is New Year's Eve on the world's greatest talk show!

0:46:52 > 0:46:55CHEERING

0:46:55 > 0:46:57You have been scintillated!

0:46:57 > 0:47:00WHOOPING

0:47:00 > 0:47:02You have been titillated!

0:47:02 > 0:47:06And, dare I say it, you have been, at times, utterly nauseated!

0:47:06 > 0:47:07ALL: Whoo!

0:47:07 > 0:47:12You've gagged at the mysterious Zac and his sensational spitballs.

0:47:12 > 0:47:16You've swayed at the exotic beat of Zendaya's wiggling ears.

0:47:16 > 0:47:19Yes! You've thrilled, ladies and gentlemen,

0:47:19 > 0:47:22to the savage beauty of the merciless Surannasaurus.

0:47:22 > 0:47:27You have trembled at the terrifying power...

0:47:28 > 0:47:30..of Mike's Wolverine.

0:47:31 > 0:47:33You've marvelled at Winston Churchill

0:47:33 > 0:47:35grooving to the Godfather of Soul.

0:47:35 > 0:47:38SOUL MUSIC PLAYS

0:47:38 > 0:47:39You've watched an old bearded man

0:47:39 > 0:47:43drink like a fish and pay no attention to his guests.

0:47:43 > 0:47:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:47:47 > 0:47:50But, in the end, ladies and gentlemen,

0:47:50 > 0:47:53all you really wanted to see was a man spinning on his head.

0:47:53 > 0:47:55Take it away, Ash!

0:47:59 > 0:48:01Ladies and gentlemen,

0:48:01 > 0:48:04all human life is here

0:48:04 > 0:48:07on the greatest show in the world!

0:48:07 > 0:48:10CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:48:10 > 0:48:14Thank you, Hugh! Thank you, Ash!

0:48:14 > 0:48:17Thank you, all the talented people!

0:48:17 > 0:48:19Excellent!

0:48:19 > 0:48:22It is now time for music, and what better way to end the show

0:48:22 > 0:48:26than a show-stopping number from this trio of West End divas?

0:48:26 > 0:48:30Performing One Night Only, please welcome the fabulous Leading Ladies!

0:48:30 > 0:48:33CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:48:47 > 0:48:53# You want all my love and my devotion

0:48:55 > 0:48:59# You want my love and soul

0:48:59 > 0:49:02# Right on the line

0:49:05 > 0:49:13# I have no doubt that I could love you, forever

0:49:13 > 0:49:17# The only trouble is

0:49:17 > 0:49:20# You really don't have the time

0:49:20 > 0:49:24# You've got one night only

0:49:24 > 0:49:26# One night only

0:49:26 > 0:49:30# That's all you have to spare

0:49:30 > 0:49:33# One night only

0:49:33 > 0:49:37# Let's not pretend to care

0:49:39 > 0:49:42- ALL:- # One night only

0:49:42 > 0:49:44# One night only

0:49:44 > 0:49:47# Come on, big baby, come on

0:49:48 > 0:49:50# One night only

0:49:50 > 0:49:56# We only have till dawn

0:49:56 > 0:50:01# You want all my love and my devotion

0:50:03 > 0:50:05# You want my love and soul

0:50:05 > 0:50:09# Right on the line

0:50:10 > 0:50:16# I have no doubt that I could love you forever

0:50:16 > 0:50:20# The only trouble is

0:50:20 > 0:50:23# You really don't have the time

0:50:23 > 0:50:25# You've got one night only

0:50:25 > 0:50:27# One night only

0:50:27 > 0:50:30# That's all you have to spare

0:50:30 > 0:50:32# One night only

0:50:32 > 0:50:35# Let's not pretend to care

0:50:35 > 0:50:39# You've got one night only

0:50:39 > 0:50:40# One night only

0:50:40 > 0:50:43# Come on, big baby, come on

0:50:43 > 0:50:45# One night only

0:50:45 > 0:50:49# We only have till dawn

0:50:49 > 0:50:52# We only have till dawn!

0:50:54 > 0:50:57# One night only, one night only

0:50:57 > 0:51:00# You'll be the only one

0:51:00 > 0:51:03# One night only

0:51:03 > 0:51:08# Then you have to run

0:51:08 > 0:51:11# One night only, one night only

0:51:11 > 0:51:14# There's nothing more to say

0:51:14 > 0:51:16# One night only

0:51:16 > 0:51:21# Words get in the way

0:51:21 > 0:51:23# One night only

0:51:23 > 0:51:25# Come on, come on

0:51:25 > 0:51:26# One night only

0:51:26 > 0:51:28# Come on, come on

0:51:28 > 0:51:30# One night only

0:51:30 > 0:51:33# Come on, come on Come on, come on

0:51:33 > 0:51:37# Come on, come on, come on!

0:51:37 > 0:51:38# One night only! #

0:51:38 > 0:51:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Oh!

0:51:42 > 0:51:45Wowzer!

0:51:47 > 0:51:48Wow!

0:51:48 > 0:51:50The Leading Ladies.

0:51:50 > 0:51:53Beverley, Cassidy, Amber, come on over, do!

0:51:53 > 0:51:56Oh, stunning!

0:51:56 > 0:51:57Whoa!

0:51:57 > 0:52:00Thank you so much!

0:52:00 > 0:52:03Go and meet everyone on the couch.

0:52:03 > 0:52:04- Hello, darling.- Ciao.

0:52:04 > 0:52:06Go and join the couch. Hello, congratulations.

0:52:06 > 0:52:09Come and join the couch.

0:52:09 > 0:52:13Much whooping, much cheering. ALL GREET EACH OTHER

0:52:13 > 0:52:17Marvellous, marvellous, marvellous! THEY CHATTER

0:52:17 > 0:52:19GRAHAM LAUGHS

0:52:19 > 0:52:21It's New Year's Eve, Graham...!

0:52:21 > 0:52:24I know, really. I should have got some Ferrero Rocher!

0:52:24 > 0:52:26LAUGHTER

0:52:27 > 0:52:29Thank you so much for doing that.

0:52:29 > 0:52:32That of, course is, from the album which is out now,

0:52:32 > 0:52:34- Songs From The Stage.- Yes.- Yes.

0:52:34 > 0:52:36Which has done so well, congratulations.

0:52:36 > 0:52:38- ALL:- Thank you. - I know!

0:52:38 > 0:52:40- APPLAUSE - Oh, hi!

0:52:42 > 0:52:44And clever Beverley thought of it.

0:52:44 > 0:52:47You thought of it, didn't you? It was your idea.

0:52:47 > 0:52:50Well, you know what, you've got some bigging up to give yourself,

0:52:50 > 0:52:54- high-five yourself in the mirror. - Am I getting some kerching?

0:52:54 > 0:52:56- Not quite that far!- OK!

0:52:56 > 0:53:01It was right here that I saw Amber perform,

0:53:01 > 0:53:03and the idea went, "Bing!"

0:53:03 > 0:53:05- So, yeah.- There you go, wow.

0:53:05 > 0:53:07So, that's where it all came from.

0:53:07 > 0:53:10And then I saw CJ, and I was like, "Bing!" again.

0:53:10 > 0:53:13- Yeah, yeah, yeah.- We should do something together.- Yeah.- So, yeah.

0:53:13 > 0:53:16And it's one of those things, it's like One Night Only,

0:53:16 > 0:53:18I mean, is this going to be an ongoing thing?

0:53:18 > 0:53:20Cos, Amber, you're out of here.

0:53:20 > 0:53:22- Yeah! - LAUGHTER

0:53:22 > 0:53:25- Amber's like, "Bye!" - It was really lovely, goodbye!

0:53:25 > 0:53:27No, we've had so much fun doing it.

0:53:27 > 0:53:29- Yeah.- You know, we're just trying to see, like,

0:53:29 > 0:53:31what this album's going to do.

0:53:31 > 0:53:33We don't really know what this is exactly.

0:53:33 > 0:53:35- No.- But we know that we like the way that it sounds,

0:53:35 > 0:53:37and the way that it feels, and we're having fun.

0:53:37 > 0:53:40Well, hopefully this goes on for ages, cos people are loving it.

0:53:40 > 0:53:44The Leading Ladies, everybody! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:53:46 > 0:53:47That's nearly it, but before we go,

0:53:47 > 0:53:50we do have time for just a visit to the Big Red Chair.

0:53:50 > 0:53:53And as it's Hogmanay, we're looking for stories

0:53:53 > 0:53:56with a New Year's resolution or a New Year's theme. So, who's first?

0:53:56 > 0:53:58- Hello!- Hi.

0:53:58 > 0:53:59Hi, hi.

0:54:01 > 0:54:02Keeping it simple!

0:54:02 > 0:54:05He may produce a dove!

0:54:05 > 0:54:06OK.

0:54:06 > 0:54:08LAUGHTER

0:54:09 > 0:54:11So, what's your name?

0:54:11 > 0:54:12- My name's Lorne.- Lorne, lovely.

0:54:12 > 0:54:15- And where are you from, Lorne? - I'm originally from Canada.

0:54:15 > 0:54:17- But you live here now?- I do. - What do you do?

0:54:17 > 0:54:19I run a legal advice centre.

0:54:19 > 0:54:22Oh! Posh job! And what's your New Year's resolution?

0:54:22 > 0:54:24Not to get pissed on New Year's.

0:54:24 > 0:54:27Oh. I think this will be a lot of people's New Year's resolution.

0:54:27 > 0:54:29OK, off you go with your story.

0:54:29 > 0:54:31So, a few years ago, I decided to bite the bullet

0:54:31 > 0:54:33and brave the cold for 12 hours

0:54:33 > 0:54:35to experience New Year's Eve in Times Square.

0:54:35 > 0:54:37It's about 20 minutes before the big ball drop,

0:54:37 > 0:54:39when the guy in front of me wallops me in the face.

0:54:39 > 0:54:41I immediately fall to the ground,

0:54:41 > 0:54:44but, to my dismay, the guy next to me is peeing into a bottle.

0:54:44 > 0:54:47My head hits the bottle, and he pees all over my head.

0:54:47 > 0:54:49ALL GROAN

0:54:49 > 0:54:51LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:54:51 > 0:54:52That's...

0:54:52 > 0:54:53Can you imagine?!

0:54:57 > 0:55:00Can I just say, "To my dismay"?!

0:55:01 > 0:55:04Somebody's pissing on your head!

0:55:04 > 0:55:06"I am so dismayed!"

0:55:06 > 0:55:09I've always wondered how they stand there for that long.

0:55:09 > 0:55:12- Like, where does everyone use the rest room?- Yeah.

0:55:12 > 0:55:15A friend of mine was a cop, he works there.

0:55:15 > 0:55:18You have to go in at four o'clock, if you want to be near the front,

0:55:18 > 0:55:19and you are told as you come in,

0:55:19 > 0:55:22you are not allowed to leave to go to the bathroom.

0:55:22 > 0:55:23Everyone's like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

0:55:23 > 0:55:26You know, about eight o'clock, "Everyone's like, I need to go."

0:55:26 > 0:55:29"No, we told you." And so, they have to...in bottles.

0:55:29 > 0:55:31OK, quickly, we're ignoring the people.

0:55:31 > 0:55:33So, who's up next, who's up next?

0:55:33 > 0:55:34- Hello!- Hi, how are you?

0:55:34 > 0:55:36- I'm grand, thanks, and yourself? - I'm good, thank you.

0:55:36 > 0:55:38- Good. What's your name?- Lauren.

0:55:38 > 0:55:39Lauren. Are you from...?

0:55:39 > 0:55:41- Australia.- Oh, Australia, OK.

0:55:41 > 0:55:45No, no, Australia's good. Do you live here now?

0:55:45 > 0:55:47Yeah, I live in London now, I've come from Sydney.

0:55:47 > 0:55:50- What do you do, Lauren? - I'm a corporate affairs assistant.

0:55:50 > 0:55:53Honestly, those posh people are out tonight!

0:55:53 > 0:55:55New Year's Eve, cool!

0:55:55 > 0:55:58All right, what's your New Year's resolution?

0:55:58 > 0:56:01My New Year's resolution is to invest in better underwear.

0:56:01 > 0:56:04Oooh! Good start to a story, good start to a story!

0:56:04 > 0:56:07"I was dismayed to find..."!

0:56:07 > 0:56:09Off you go with your story.

0:56:09 > 0:56:12So, this is my first public humiliation.

0:56:12 > 0:56:16I was blossoming into a voluptuous young woman.

0:56:16 > 0:56:19I was very self-conscious about it, my family knew that,

0:56:19 > 0:56:21and, obviously, as Australians,

0:56:21 > 0:56:23they decided to tease me incessantly.

0:56:23 > 0:56:26Anyway, we go away to a beach holiday. We're all in bikinis.

0:56:26 > 0:56:28I'm getting teased on the beach for my big boobs.

0:56:28 > 0:56:30And I'm in a horrible mood.

0:56:30 > 0:56:33We go back to the house to have a shower before dinner.

0:56:33 > 0:56:36I go to the bathroom and I see my cousin,

0:56:36 > 0:56:38who was a lot more voluptuous than I was,

0:56:38 > 0:56:40I see her bikini there.

0:56:40 > 0:56:43So, I was like, "Oh, put her bikini on, show everyone,"

0:56:43 > 0:56:45and they'll be like, "Oh, we can't tease you any more,

0:56:45 > 0:56:49"your boobs aren't that big." So, I put it on, put the towel around me,

0:56:49 > 0:56:53strut out to the lounge room where everyone is, whip the towel off,

0:56:53 > 0:56:56strut into the room, just stand there with hands on my hips,

0:56:56 > 0:56:58and I'm like, "I told you they weren't that big."

0:56:58 > 0:57:01And then, there's this weird, shocked silence,

0:57:01 > 0:57:03and then they all started screaming, covering their faces.

0:57:03 > 0:57:06And I was like, "This is really rude."

0:57:06 > 0:57:08And then...

0:57:08 > 0:57:11And I look down, and I forgot to put on the bottoms.

0:57:11 > 0:57:13ALL ROAR, APPLAUSE

0:57:13 > 0:57:16Good story! Good story!

0:57:16 > 0:57:18- You can walk, darling.- Thank you!

0:57:19 > 0:57:22That was good.

0:57:22 > 0:57:24One more, one more, one more.

0:57:24 > 0:57:25This is the last.

0:57:25 > 0:57:27- Hello, sir.- Hello.

0:57:27 > 0:57:29- Hi, what's your name?- Simon.

0:57:29 > 0:57:32- Simon, lovely. And what do you do, Simon?- I'm an insurance broker.

0:57:32 > 0:57:35OK! There had to be one! LAUGHTER

0:57:35 > 0:57:38And what's your New Year's resolution?

0:57:38 > 0:57:40To get some better friends.

0:57:40 > 0:57:43ALL GROAN

0:57:43 > 0:57:46Well, we can't flip him now, can we?!

0:57:46 > 0:57:48Simon, he's alone.

0:57:48 > 0:57:50OK, off you go with your story.

0:57:50 > 0:57:53Well, a long time ago I had a bad knee injury playing rugby,

0:57:53 > 0:57:55and I needed an operation.

0:57:55 > 0:57:58Luckily I had some private health care,

0:57:58 > 0:58:00so I had a room to recover in.

0:58:00 > 0:58:01Oh, my God!

0:58:01 > 0:58:05I was recovering in my own room the day after the operation,

0:58:05 > 0:58:07feeling pretty sorry for myself, and a knock on the door,

0:58:07 > 0:58:10and it's the surgeon who's operated on me.

0:58:10 > 0:58:16He comes in, and he opens up the huge bandage on my left leg,

0:58:16 > 0:58:18and said, "OK, well, it's looking good,

0:58:18 > 0:58:21"but you need to stay still for an hour or so,

0:58:21 > 0:58:24"let the wound breathe, and I'll be back,

0:58:24 > 0:58:27"or one of the nurses will be back, to dress it, so just stay put."

0:58:27 > 0:58:29So I said, "Fine." So, he leaves,

0:58:29 > 0:58:31a couple of minutes later there's a knock on the door.

0:58:31 > 0:58:34Round the corner come two of my mates,

0:58:34 > 0:58:37clutching a bag of half-eaten grapes,

0:58:37 > 0:58:40sporting some grinning faces,

0:58:40 > 0:58:43and clutching a pretty graphic porn mag.

0:58:43 > 0:58:44ALL: Oh!

0:58:44 > 0:58:46So...

0:58:47 > 0:58:51It was... No animals, but it was not far short.

0:58:51 > 0:58:54So, they see my predicament.

0:58:54 > 0:58:57I'm lying there, I can't move, and they don't say a word.

0:58:57 > 0:59:00They proceed to take this magazine apart

0:59:00 > 0:59:04and stick every picture inside it on my bed, on the window,

0:59:04 > 0:59:09on the sheet the nurses will use to check my recovery.

0:59:09 > 0:59:10ALL GROAN

0:59:10 > 0:59:16And their parting gift was to press the nurse's button.

0:59:16 > 0:59:17GROANING AND LAUGHTER

0:59:17 > 0:59:19That is quite a good story.

0:59:19 > 0:59:21It was long. You can walk, walk, walk.

0:59:21 > 0:59:23APPLAUSE

0:59:23 > 0:59:26Well done, everyone. If you'd like to join us on the show

0:59:26 > 0:59:29and have a go in the Red Chair, you can contact us via the website

0:59:29 > 0:59:31at this very address. That is it for tonight.

0:59:31 > 0:59:34Please say a huge thank you to my guests, the Leading Ladies!

0:59:34 > 0:59:36CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:59:36 > 0:59:38Zac Efron!

0:59:38 > 0:59:39Zendaya!

0:59:39 > 0:59:41Hugh Jackman!

0:59:41 > 0:59:43Suranne Jones!

0:59:45 > 0:59:46And Mr Gary Oldman!

0:59:46 > 0:59:48CHEERING

0:59:48 > 0:59:51We're back on the 12th of January with a very special show

0:59:51 > 0:59:55devoted to two of our greatest actors, Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep.

0:59:55 > 0:59:58Can't wait! Till then, have a very happy New Year, everybody.

0:59:58 > 0:59:59Goodnight and goodbye!

0:59:59 > 1:00:01CHEERING AND APPLAUSE