Episode 4

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0:00:09 > 0:00:11On the show tonight...

0:00:11 > 0:00:14Bear Grylls,

0:00:14 > 0:00:16Gary Barlow,

0:00:16 > 0:00:19Nigella Lawson.

0:00:19 > 0:00:23But first, please welcome your host, Michael McIntyre.

0:00:28 > 0:00:29No more.

0:00:33 > 0:00:35Bravo! Bravo!

0:00:41 > 0:00:45Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to The Michael McIntyre Chat Show.

0:00:49 > 0:00:54We have an amazing show tonight, so let's get straight on with it.

0:00:57 > 0:01:00My first guest is an alligator-wrestling adrenaline junkie.

0:01:00 > 0:01:02He is no stranger to danger.

0:01:02 > 0:01:05He conquered Everest and his TV shows have conquered the world.

0:01:05 > 0:01:08He is the master of the mountain, king of the jungle,

0:01:08 > 0:01:10and a health and safety nightmare.

0:01:10 > 0:01:12Please welcome Bear Grylls.

0:01:22 > 0:01:26- Nice to see you.- What an absolute pleasure. Bear Grylls!

0:01:32 > 0:01:35What an absolute pleasure to have you here. Thank you, yes.

0:01:35 > 0:01:37I don't know what I expected you to be wearing.

0:01:37 > 0:01:40- I suppose this is the kind of get up...- I suddenly feel quite unsmart.

0:01:40 > 0:01:43- Should I have worn a suit, do you think?- No. You're mostly naked.

0:01:43 > 0:01:47- I don't have a suit, only a shirt. - That's quite a lot of nakedness.

0:01:47 > 0:01:50Well, the truth is, you know, you're out there for however many days.

0:01:50 > 0:01:53At one point, you're going to have a wash in a stream or whatever

0:01:53 > 0:01:57and, you know, that's three minutes out of five days that you're out,

0:01:57 > 0:02:00but it always seems to end up on TV and, um, I always get a lot of...

0:02:00 > 0:02:03My wife goes, "Why are you always taking your clothes off?"

0:02:03 > 0:02:06I go, "I took them off three minutes in five days!"

0:02:06 > 0:02:08- And so, yes. - You must notice all the cameras.

0:02:08 > 0:02:12LAUGHTER

0:02:12 > 0:02:15It's very easy to say, "Guys, I'm going to have shower now."

0:02:15 > 0:02:20I do that a lot. I'm always saying, you know, "Guys, I'm going to go to the loo behind the bush,"

0:02:20 > 0:02:22and invariably, I sort of finish,

0:02:22 > 0:02:25and pull my trousers up and I see a distant little red blinking

0:02:25 > 0:02:27camera, and I go, "Leave me alone!"

0:02:27 > 0:02:29We've actually got a photo of you.

0:02:29 > 0:02:32LAUGHTER

0:02:33 > 0:02:36So what are you doing here?

0:02:36 > 0:02:37What is that?

0:02:37 > 0:02:40Bear, you must remember this. You're naked in the snow.

0:02:40 > 0:02:43It's a very good way of getting warm after you've got out of a very

0:02:43 > 0:02:48- cold icy river.- Can I tell you another one?- Do some jumping jacks. - Put some clothes on, Bear!- Yes.

0:02:48 > 0:02:51I thought you were making a hole for the tent peg.

0:02:53 > 0:02:55So tell me about this new show.

0:02:55 > 0:02:58You've got a new show for Discovery and it's called...

0:02:58 > 0:03:01It's called Bear Grylls' Extreme Survival Caught On Camera.

0:03:01 > 0:03:05- And we've got a new show coming up, Channel 4, called the Island Of Lost Blokes.- What's that?

0:03:05 > 0:03:09It's really a study of my experiment of what's happened to modern-day man.

0:03:09 > 0:03:12What makes a man masculine nowadays, you know.

0:03:12 > 0:03:15- So we took 13 regular modern British men...- Oh, that's interesting...

0:03:15 > 0:03:18Teachers, plumbers, the whole lot, and no...

0:03:18 > 0:03:21Very little training, no equipment, no camera crews,

0:03:21 > 0:03:24they had to film it all themselves and I dropped them in basically hell.

0:03:24 > 0:03:28This swamp-infested crocodile, you know, nasty place.

0:03:28 > 0:03:33- How many are there left?- Um... Well...- It's a bit like The Hunger Games.

0:03:33 > 0:03:36- I won't give it away but chaos ensues, basically.- Really?

0:03:36 > 0:03:38- I think we've got a clip from that. - OK, cool.

0:03:38 > 0:03:42More dangerous than any snake, scorpion or crocodile

0:03:42 > 0:03:44is this fellow.

0:03:44 > 0:03:48Innocent looking little apple, actually called the death apple

0:03:48 > 0:03:52and this is enough to kill not one man,

0:03:52 > 0:03:55but 20 and when you're surviving on an island, you're hungry, you

0:03:55 > 0:04:01see what you think is edible fruits, so tempting to pick it up, eat it.

0:04:01 > 0:04:02Endgame.

0:04:02 > 0:04:05APPLAUSE

0:04:05 > 0:04:07The killer apple, Bear!

0:04:07 > 0:04:10How does that kill 20 men? I don't understand.

0:04:10 > 0:04:12They're just scarily toxic, you know.

0:04:12 > 0:04:15Yeah, but 20 men? Surely after the first one's died...

0:04:15 > 0:04:17LAUGHTER

0:04:17 > 0:04:20Who's going to go, "Oh, can I get a bite of that?"

0:04:20 > 0:04:23That actually gets to 20 men? The 20th one is not an intelligent man.

0:04:23 > 0:04:26I'm never quite sure how they found the statistic.

0:04:26 > 0:04:29You're surrounded by dead bodies. "It is tempting!"

0:04:32 > 0:04:36- So what would happen, Bear, I think we all want to know. - Well, the truth is, the thing is,

0:04:36 > 0:04:40I always wonder how they find these facts out and what our crew have worked out, when I say something

0:04:40 > 0:04:44like that, they go, "Is that a Bear fact or a real fact?" 20 men.

0:04:44 > 0:04:50- Moving on... Um...- Now, you live off the coast of Wales on an island.

0:04:50 > 0:04:52I don't know if people are aware of this.

0:04:52 > 0:04:55This came as a real shock to me. This is actually your home?

0:04:55 > 0:04:59Yeah, it is. It's where we spend part of the year up in North Wales.

0:04:59 > 0:05:02- You're like a superhero! - But I love it.

0:05:02 > 0:05:05It's about, you know, it's a few miles off the north Welsh coast.

0:05:05 > 0:05:08But do you have everything there? Do you have like internet and...

0:05:08 > 0:05:10Er, no. No, No, but I quite like that.

0:05:10 > 0:05:11We're not there all of the year.

0:05:11 > 0:05:13I quite like the fact that it's a real retreat

0:05:13 > 0:05:18and we haven't got phones and internet and we collect rainwater off

0:05:18 > 0:05:22the roof and there's a lot of manual this and manual that and I love that.

0:05:22 > 0:05:25Cos I'm fascinated by this, because I've got children

0:05:25 > 0:05:29and I want them to be like you. I want them to be adventurers and I can't get them in the garden.

0:05:29 > 0:05:32Do you know what I mean? "Get in the bloody garden!" There's a lot of iPads.

0:05:32 > 0:05:36It's a big old place. Bring them up. It's a wild old playground up there.

0:05:36 > 0:05:38I can't wait to come over with my kids

0:05:38 > 0:05:42- and you'll be there doing naked press ups!- That was a winter one.

0:05:42 > 0:05:46Pressing up, "Help yourself to rainwater, guys!"

0:05:49 > 0:05:52It's amazing to get in touch with nature like that.

0:05:52 > 0:05:54So have your kids taken to it because you never know,

0:05:54 > 0:05:57you know, how your kids are going to be, like you did?

0:05:57 > 0:06:00Yeah, I mean, generally this isn't something we kind of force on them,

0:06:00 > 0:06:02you know, I think the best way to parent

0:06:02 > 0:06:05is example, you know, and we do lots of this sort of stuff for fun.

0:06:05 > 0:06:08You say the best way to parent is by example

0:06:08 > 0:06:11and it is, but you do take a lot of risks, Bear.

0:06:11 > 0:06:13Shall I show you an example, for your children?

0:06:13 > 0:06:17Can we show the seal thing? That's quite interesting. So here's you...

0:06:17 > 0:06:18Now, what's going on here, Bear?

0:06:18 > 0:06:20Well, this was the Hebrides in winter time

0:06:20 > 0:06:23and I was trying to work out how to get from one island to the other

0:06:23 > 0:06:26and it was cold and I found this old seal and it was rotten,

0:06:26 > 0:06:28and I said to the crew, "We can do something with this,"

0:06:28 > 0:06:31and they said, "It's stinking. You can't use that." And I said,

0:06:31 > 0:06:35"It's the ultimate wet suit if we can skin this." And they went, "That's never going to work."

0:06:35 > 0:06:39So then it became a point of pride that I'm going to make this work, skinned it.

0:06:39 > 0:06:43It was a little bit tight and quite a suspect-looking gilet.

0:06:43 > 0:06:46But I got it on. It worked a treat, you know, it kept me nice and warm.

0:06:46 > 0:06:51You skinned a seal? And turned it into a wet suit?

0:06:51 > 0:06:54It had these sort of hairs protruding from it

0:06:54 > 0:06:55and a lot of stinking blubber underneath.

0:06:55 > 0:07:00And that's what you ended up with? It's a sort of cropped tank-top.

0:07:00 > 0:07:05It's simultaneously the most macho and campest thing I've ever seen.

0:07:05 > 0:07:08But it worked a treat and it's a part of survival.

0:07:08 > 0:07:11I love being, you know, resourceful and using your initiative

0:07:11 > 0:07:15- and imagination.- It's not initiative. It's completely insane, Bear.

0:07:15 > 0:07:19- That's... Is that making you warmer? This seal... I mean, was it in your size?- Way warmer!

0:07:19 > 0:07:21This is the bit you've got to keep warm.

0:07:21 > 0:07:25Are you going through all the seals going, "Is there a medium here? I need a medium!"

0:07:25 > 0:07:28"Is there an XL? I don't know. How do these seals come up on me?"

0:07:29 > 0:07:33Now, Bear, I'm very excited about this thing they've given me,

0:07:33 > 0:07:35which is your survival thing.

0:07:35 > 0:07:38Yeah, that's a basic survival pack that...you need to start taking

0:07:38 > 0:07:41- this everywhere.- Right, so this is the Bear essential...

0:07:41 > 0:07:43- Is that what you call it, the Bear essentials?- No, you go...

0:07:43 > 0:07:47- You don't even call it that?- Well, it's...- Why don't you call it that?

0:07:47 > 0:07:53I don't know. I thought it was a bit cheesy. But good. But good!

0:07:53 > 0:07:55- Just trying to help. - Not in a bad way, Michael.- OK.

0:07:55 > 0:07:57So let's go through it. What is this one?

0:07:57 > 0:07:58That will help you start a fire.

0:07:58 > 0:08:01It's a fire steel, creates sparks and will light tinder.

0:08:01 > 0:08:04So how do you create sparks? What are you talking about?

0:08:12 > 0:08:16Hold on, hold on. It's got to be warmed up. Hold on. Patience.

0:08:16 > 0:08:19Are you the real Bear Grylls?

0:08:19 > 0:08:20LAUGHTER

0:08:27 > 0:08:31- Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. - If you want, I've got a match.

0:08:31 > 0:08:32LAUGHTER

0:08:36 > 0:08:40Hold on, we'll get there. I've known it to take two days to start.

0:08:44 > 0:08:47Oh, yes! Yes!

0:08:47 > 0:08:48APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:08:50 > 0:08:53Well done. I have to say, you got there in the end.

0:08:53 > 0:08:55That was fantastic.

0:08:55 > 0:08:58It's not always pretty, it sometimes takes a bit of time. There you go.

0:08:58 > 0:09:00What have you got there?

0:09:00 > 0:09:02That went on so long, I nearly ordered a death apple.

0:09:04 > 0:09:07But then you've got to have some... Then you've got to have some

0:09:07 > 0:09:10- tinder to light it. - Shoelaces? What is this?

0:09:10 > 0:09:14You can make snares, or tie up a shelter or, you know, lots of things.

0:09:14 > 0:09:16Rope is always essential.

0:09:16 > 0:09:21This is a whistle. Is it? Well, that's just fabulous, isn't it?

0:09:21 > 0:09:22LAUGHTER

0:09:22 > 0:09:24Saved a lot of lives.

0:09:24 > 0:09:28I'm in the jungle, I'm on my own, I'm naked, I'm hungry.

0:09:28 > 0:09:30HE BLOWS

0:09:33 > 0:09:36HE WHISTLES CLAPPED FOOTBALL CHANT

0:09:36 > 0:09:38OK. Saved a lot of lives.

0:09:41 > 0:09:44This is brilliant. And these are?

0:09:44 > 0:09:49Waterproof matches, so they will light even when they're wet.

0:09:49 > 0:09:52- OK, great. So if the spark...- Shall we test that?- Waterproof matches?

0:09:52 > 0:09:56- OK, brilliant, yes.- Let's get some water and try it.- This is great.

0:09:56 > 0:09:59- Hold on, I can't... - This might be another one that...

0:10:02 > 0:10:05All right, OK, hold on. You see how much I can survive?

0:10:05 > 0:10:07I can't get the packet open!

0:10:08 > 0:10:12- There's no rush. There's no rush. - There is a rush.

0:10:12 > 0:10:15- Here you go, let's use a knife. We've got a knife.- Oh, brilliant.

0:10:15 > 0:10:18- There you go.- This is amazing.- Don't cut yourself. Cut away from yourself.

0:10:18 > 0:10:20Cut away from myself. OK.

0:10:21 > 0:10:25And remember, a sharp knife is a safe knife.

0:10:25 > 0:10:28- It's the blunt ones that are most dangerous.- No.

0:10:28 > 0:10:29LAUGHTER

0:10:30 > 0:10:33All right, so I've opened that with my knife cutting away from my body,

0:10:33 > 0:10:37then I put that down there and then you take your match,

0:10:37 > 0:10:40this waterproof match, and we're going to dip it.

0:10:40 > 0:10:43- Well, let's just throw it in. - Throw it in, brilliant. OK.

0:10:45 > 0:10:47What are you doing on the table?

0:10:49 > 0:10:52There we go. So it's all wet, you're in the river.

0:10:54 > 0:10:56- LAUGHTER - In the river!

0:10:56 > 0:10:59APPLAUSE

0:10:59 > 0:11:03I'm not in the river, Bear. I'm in a television studio.

0:11:03 > 0:11:06- Dry it off as best you can. - I'm not in the river,

0:11:06 > 0:11:08I wouldn't dress like this if I was in the jungle.

0:11:10 > 0:11:11APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:11:14 > 0:11:17- There you go.- Amazing. Thank you so much for that, Bear.

0:11:26 > 0:11:30The only thing that I know I can use this for at the moment is this.

0:11:33 > 0:11:36So, I just wanted to quickly ask you, if it was just us

0:11:36 > 0:11:40and nothing else was in the world and it was just us on this set,

0:11:40 > 0:11:43- but we've got this, how would we survive?- Well, first, we'd

0:11:43 > 0:11:46say thank goodness for the basic survival kit that you've got.

0:11:46 > 0:11:49Excellent. We've got the whistle. We've got a knife.

0:11:49 > 0:11:52I'd probably put you in charge of whistling.

0:11:53 > 0:11:56Station you somewhere around here. We've got great shelter.

0:11:56 > 0:12:01- We can both sleep under this. - Really? How would we do that?

0:12:01 > 0:12:04Well, we could kind of spoon. Good body warmth.

0:12:11 > 0:12:13LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:12:16 > 0:12:21And then put your arm over. And then you've got a pillow here. You know?

0:12:21 > 0:12:24- We're halfway to surviving already. - I'm loving this.

0:12:24 > 0:12:29All right, we've got shelter. We've got our telephone.

0:12:29 > 0:12:34Could I get a helicopter out here, please? What about the plants?

0:12:34 > 0:12:38Could we eat these? I've got these Homebase plants. Is this edible?

0:12:38 > 0:12:43Actually, there's a lot of good stuff over here. We've got it all.

0:12:43 > 0:12:45It's like a buffet for you.

0:12:49 > 0:12:51Don't you take that to bed with us.

0:12:51 > 0:12:54Don't you dare take that to bed with us, Bear.

0:12:57 > 0:12:58I tell you what...

0:12:58 > 0:13:00LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:13:06 > 0:13:09All I'll say is, you're going to know all about it.

0:13:11 > 0:13:13HE BLOWS WHISTLE

0:13:14 > 0:13:15LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:13:17 > 0:13:20- So, yes. - Frightened the life out of me.

0:13:20 > 0:13:23You get the fluids out of the cactus to stay alive.

0:13:23 > 0:13:25So where are the fluids in the cactus?

0:13:25 > 0:13:27- Well, you want to take the spikes off.- Ow!

0:13:29 > 0:13:36Lesson one, watch out for that. So we would, we'd have a log fire.

0:13:36 > 0:13:38LAUGHTER

0:13:40 > 0:13:42- Pay attention. Pay attention.- Ah!

0:13:45 > 0:13:50- I'm not surviving, Bear!- It's all right, we can have a sit-down.

0:13:50 > 0:13:55- We'd have started a fire with the flint.- Are we burning the desk now?

0:13:55 > 0:13:58- We'd probably burn all these nasty spikes off.- Good idea.

0:13:58 > 0:14:01And then we can skin it to get the fluid underneath.

0:14:01 > 0:14:04You've got to be careful - some, again, can kill you.

0:14:04 > 0:14:08So if you see a milky white sap, we're not going to drink it.

0:14:08 > 0:14:10Ha! No milky white sap.

0:14:14 > 0:14:17- It's so mad.- Eating?

0:14:17 > 0:14:20Eating - we might have to be slightly more resourceful

0:14:20 > 0:14:22at the moment.

0:14:22 > 0:14:26Don't eat me, Bear.

0:14:26 > 0:14:30You can survive three minutes without air, three days without water,

0:14:30 > 0:14:34three weeks without food. So food is not our priority at the moment.

0:14:34 > 0:14:37It's about hydrating. Water. Pee, you can drink pee.

0:14:37 > 0:14:39Well, can I just say, we had water.

0:14:39 > 0:14:41LAUGHTER

0:14:51 > 0:14:53You're absolutely right.

0:14:53 > 0:14:55It might not be pretty or nice but it can save your life,

0:14:55 > 0:14:57you've got to start thinking like that.

0:14:57 > 0:15:00- Basically, we've got it all. We've got fire...- Fire.- ..shelter.- Shelter.

0:15:00 > 0:15:03..erm, water or fluids,

0:15:03 > 0:15:05and a little bit of a, you know, we can eat the cactus,

0:15:05 > 0:15:08that's a little bit of food, and we've got you whistling,

0:15:08 > 0:15:10so to be honest, we're in good shape.

0:15:10 > 0:15:11I'd feel safe with Bear.

0:15:13 > 0:15:15Oh, fun, fun, fun!

0:15:17 > 0:15:20Bear, that is what you're all about. So much fun.

0:15:20 > 0:15:22I want to thank you so much for coming on the show.

0:15:22 > 0:15:23How fun was that?

0:15:23 > 0:15:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:15:25 > 0:15:27Ladies and gentlemen, the fantastic Bear Grylls!

0:15:27 > 0:15:31Thank you so much. That was awesome.

0:15:31 > 0:15:33One more time for Bear Grylls.

0:15:36 > 0:15:38Wow. I have been through it with Bear.

0:15:40 > 0:15:43He just left. He just went. It's like he wasn't even here.

0:15:43 > 0:15:47He's like a superhero. He's just off to do dangerous things.

0:15:47 > 0:15:49He probably just ran in the middle of the road,

0:15:49 > 0:15:51just jumped on top of a car.

0:15:52 > 0:15:54Going back to his rock.

0:15:55 > 0:15:57OK, Bear Grylls, how fantastic was that?

0:16:03 > 0:16:07My next guest has been generating pop perfection for over 20 years.

0:16:07 > 0:16:09He's the musical genius behind the biggest

0:16:09 > 0:16:11and best boy band there's ever been.

0:16:11 > 0:16:14He's created five number one albums, 13 number one singles

0:16:14 > 0:16:18and A Million Love Songs, he is the unbelievable Gary Barlow!

0:16:18 > 0:16:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:16:19 > 0:16:22SONG: "Never Forget" by Take That

0:16:31 > 0:16:33Thank you so much.

0:16:33 > 0:16:35Gary Barlow's here!

0:16:41 > 0:16:44- Gaz!- How are you?- I'm very well. How are you?- Good. Good.

0:16:44 > 0:16:48Shall we tell everyone how we met? Do you remember?

0:16:48 > 0:16:51- There's a story behind this that you don't even know.- I know.

0:16:51 > 0:16:52I know all our stories.

0:16:54 > 0:16:57- There's one you don't know. - Go on.- Shall I tell you?

0:16:57 > 0:16:59I want to tell everyone. Because it was great.

0:16:59 > 0:17:03It was my tenth wedding anniversary, me and my wife,

0:17:03 > 0:17:05and we were organising a big party for our friends.

0:17:05 > 0:17:07- You remember all this. - Of course I do.

0:17:07 > 0:17:11And my wife said, "What are we doing about entertainment?" I said,

0:17:11 > 0:17:14"I've got some friends coming who are singers, it's going to be great.

0:17:14 > 0:17:16"Leave it to me. Leave it to me.

0:17:16 > 0:17:18"I'm going to sort all the entertainment out."

0:17:18 > 0:17:22And she said, "Listen, that's fine, as long as Michael Buble's there,

0:17:22 > 0:17:24"it's fine. It's no problem."

0:17:24 > 0:17:29OK, so honestly, I tried everybody who knew Michael Buble.

0:17:29 > 0:17:33No luck whatsoever. He's away, he's on tour, he's doing all this stuff.

0:17:33 > 0:17:34So we can't get him.

0:17:34 > 0:17:36I thought, "Oh, no!"

0:17:36 > 0:17:39But then I remembered her second favourite comedian was you.

0:17:39 > 0:17:42LAUGHTER

0:17:42 > 0:17:44I only say that cos, obviously,

0:17:44 > 0:17:48Peter Kay's a very close friend of ours, so I've got to put him first.

0:17:48 > 0:17:50- Oh, it wasn't a joke, it was... - No, it was actually true.

0:17:50 > 0:17:53- It's actually true. - It's actually true!

0:17:53 > 0:17:56But you're only second to Peter Kay. Don't worry.

0:17:59 > 0:18:01OK.

0:18:01 > 0:18:06So I knew that my wife loved you, so I called you up

0:18:06 > 0:18:09and you very kindly agreed to come along, didn't you?

0:18:09 > 0:18:12- Yes, I remember it so well. - You very kindly did.

0:18:12 > 0:18:15You took the evening out of your life and you came to perform at our party.

0:18:15 > 0:18:20So just before you went on I went, "Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to

0:18:20 > 0:18:23"have some entertainment now," and my wife didn't know who was coming.

0:18:23 > 0:18:25"And I've got a great act."

0:18:25 > 0:18:29And my wife sat there thinking, "Here comes Buble!

0:18:29 > 0:18:30"Here comes Buble!" And I said,

0:18:30 > 0:18:34"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our first act tonight, Michael..."

0:18:34 > 0:18:36She's thinking, "Here comes Buble!"

0:18:36 > 0:18:38"..McIntyre!"

0:18:38 > 0:18:40"Oh, no Buble."

0:18:40 > 0:18:42Fortunately, you were brilliant.

0:18:43 > 0:18:46You were brilliant and you entertained us all.

0:18:46 > 0:18:49You were excellent. Sorry, I had to share that story.

0:18:49 > 0:18:52- Now, Gary.- Yes. - You are looking incredible.

0:18:52 > 0:18:56- Do you tire of hearing that? - Never. No.- It's not something...

0:18:56 > 0:18:59- What did you say? - You look incredible.

0:18:59 > 0:19:02- Make-up, plastic surgery.- No.

0:19:02 > 0:19:07I've been told that you are... You had the Beard Of The Year.

0:19:07 > 0:19:10This is right. Did you know you won this?

0:19:10 > 0:19:12- Were you informed of this victory? - I never got the award.

0:19:12 > 0:19:15- You never got the award? - I was told I was in the running.

0:19:15 > 0:19:18- I didn't know I'd won. - Ladies and gentlemen...- Thank you.

0:19:18 > 0:19:20..we've got a scoop tonight.

0:19:20 > 0:19:23I can announce that Gary Barlow is Beard Of The Year.

0:19:23 > 0:19:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:19:27 > 0:19:29Haircut... You had the most requested...

0:19:29 > 0:19:32- Did you know this as well? The most requested haircut of 2012.- Really?

0:19:32 > 0:19:36Yes. That was two years ago, but it doesn't mean it's not a great...

0:19:36 > 0:19:38- People go and they ask for the Gary Barlow.- Is that right?

0:19:38 > 0:19:40- It's an extraordinary situation. - Wow. OK.

0:19:40 > 0:19:42And you are looking good, so how do you do that?

0:19:42 > 0:19:45Did you think about your look? The haircut, the beard?

0:19:45 > 0:19:47I think a lot of those things came around from actually being on TV

0:19:47 > 0:19:51a lot, because when I started to do X Factor three years ago

0:19:51 > 0:19:55those things like Nose Of The Year, Rear Of The Year,

0:19:55 > 0:19:58Haircut Of The Year, all these things just started emerging.

0:19:58 > 0:20:00Sorry, I don't want to upset you, you didn't win the first two.

0:20:02 > 0:20:04- Here's a question for you, Gary. - Mm-hm.

0:20:04 > 0:20:07- Early Take That, when you first got assembled...- Mm-hm.

0:20:07 > 0:20:09- How old were you when you first got together?- I was 19.

0:20:09 > 0:20:14- Rob was 16.- Wow. - Mark was 17, I think.

0:20:14 > 0:20:16Howard was 47.

0:20:16 > 0:20:18LAUGHTER

0:20:18 > 0:20:20He's going to kill me for that. He really is.

0:20:20 > 0:20:23Howard was a little bit older. I think he was 23.

0:20:23 > 0:20:28- So, if these teenagers and Howard... - LAUGHTER

0:20:28 > 0:20:32..walked onto the X Factor stage and sung your first song

0:20:32 > 0:20:35and you're sitting on the panel, what would you have said?

0:20:35 > 0:20:39I remember when we first started, we were so ambitious.

0:20:39 > 0:20:42We really wanted to take the world on.

0:20:42 > 0:20:45But for the first year, definitely, we were rubbish.

0:20:45 > 0:20:46We were rubbish.

0:20:46 > 0:20:49We needed a lot of work, and we had choreographers who came in,

0:20:49 > 0:20:51we had singing lessons and all the rest of it.

0:20:51 > 0:20:55And our manager really did grow it from the ground up.

0:20:55 > 0:20:58But I did think we got quite good quite quickly, as well.

0:20:58 > 0:21:01Well, there's no doubt that you did very well, Gary!

0:21:01 > 0:21:04But I'm just wondering - is it a yes from you?

0:21:05 > 0:21:08- Probably a no.- A no?

0:21:08 > 0:21:09Probably a, "Come back next year,"

0:21:09 > 0:21:13and we'd have gone back the next year and you'd have had that music.

0:21:13 > 0:21:16- Yes.- That running music.

0:21:16 > 0:21:19Simon, what do you think Simon would have said?

0:21:19 > 0:21:21- I don't know.- Louis? Yes, it's a yes.

0:21:21 > 0:21:24- HIGH-PITCHED IRISH ACCENT:- "Oh, yes! Fantastic. Absolutely fantastic!

0:21:24 > 0:21:26"Especially you two."

0:21:26 > 0:21:30When you said singing lessons, I want to know what that means.

0:21:30 > 0:21:33Because I watch these people having lessons. What does it mean?

0:21:33 > 0:21:35Tell me what to do. Singing.

0:21:35 > 0:21:38- Like, the first lesson. - You warm up first.

0:21:38 > 0:21:39So how do you do that?

0:21:39 > 0:21:42# Mamma mia fettuccine

0:21:42 > 0:21:45# Mamma mia fettuccine. #

0:21:45 > 0:21:49- You're warming up all the vowels. - Who is that woman?

0:21:49 > 0:21:52- # Mamma mia ravioli. # - Oh, brilliant.

0:21:52 > 0:21:53Yes, you do all the vowels.

0:21:53 > 0:21:56Can I have a spaghetti bolognese while we're at it?

0:21:56 > 0:21:57OK.

0:21:57 > 0:21:59# Mamma mia fettuccine. # Oh, cos it's...

0:21:59 > 0:22:02- You've got to go through the... - Don't strain your neck.

0:22:02 > 0:22:04You're pushing your neck forward. Relax your neck.

0:22:04 > 0:22:06I'm trying to get rid of the chins.

0:22:06 > 0:22:08It's not working.

0:22:08 > 0:22:09# Mamma mia fetu...

0:22:11 > 0:22:13# Mamma mia fettuccine. #

0:22:13 > 0:22:15- That was awful.- It's getting better.

0:22:15 > 0:22:17# Mamma mia cannelloni. #

0:22:18 > 0:22:21# Mamma mia...garlic bread. #

0:22:24 > 0:22:27So, your first love is writing, it's writing music.

0:22:27 > 0:22:29- Actually, it's equal for me.- Yeah.

0:22:29 > 0:22:31I do love performing and I do love writing music.

0:22:31 > 0:22:33I just love being involved in music.

0:22:33 > 0:22:35Can you tell me about the process, though?

0:22:35 > 0:22:37Because melody - I hear the word "melody".

0:22:37 > 0:22:38Do you just hear that in your head,

0:22:38 > 0:22:41do you just keep humming until something comes? I don't know...

0:22:41 > 0:22:44- I've never understood how this works.- I know, I know.

0:22:44 > 0:22:47Whenever I sit down to write, whether it's a new record for the band

0:22:47 > 0:22:51or myself or whatever, I sit down and I think, "Has the luck run out?

0:22:51 > 0:22:53"Is this it?"

0:22:53 > 0:22:56- Always feel...- I think, if you're a creative person,

0:22:56 > 0:22:59I don't know if you ever truly value the talent you have

0:22:59 > 0:23:03- to be able to sit... I always think it's luck.- Yeah.

0:23:03 > 0:23:05I think, "I've just been lucky for all these years,"

0:23:05 > 0:23:07and, "Has it run out, eventually?"

0:23:07 > 0:23:11Is this going to be the day I realise it's never going to happen again?

0:23:11 > 0:23:15- And so it never feels like your own...- I've got news for you, Gary.

0:23:15 > 0:23:18Your luck has not run out. Your new single is amazing.

0:23:18 > 0:23:20- We've got a clip of the video.- OK.

0:23:20 > 0:23:22- It's very catchy!- Thank you. - You've still got it, Gary!

0:23:22 > 0:23:24You've still got it!

0:23:25 > 0:23:28# Today I took back what was stolen

0:23:28 > 0:23:33# And gave new life to what was frozen

0:23:33 > 0:23:37# One mouth talking a dead man walking

0:23:37 > 0:23:41# A thousand faces watched me falling

0:23:41 > 0:23:45# I've made my peace with what may happen

0:23:45 > 0:23:49# Accepted I won't be in fashion

0:23:49 > 0:23:51# All you gave, I got it

0:23:51 > 0:23:55# Yeah, you gave, I got it all back

0:23:55 > 0:23:58# Since I saw you last... #

0:23:58 > 0:24:00Oh, come on, that is a monster hit!

0:24:00 > 0:24:02I should have had you in the video.

0:24:02 > 0:24:05# Since I... # I love your videos as well.

0:24:05 > 0:24:07They're so black and white and serious.

0:24:07 > 0:24:10You can't do anything unless you're black and white and serious.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12Look at you, just so serious. "I'm just so serious.

0:24:12 > 0:24:15"Look at my hair. I'm going to win awards for this hair.

0:24:15 > 0:24:18"You can TRY and copy my shaving...

0:24:18 > 0:24:21"I've won Beard Of The Year three years on the trot."

0:24:21 > 0:24:24# Since I saw you last. # I love it!

0:24:24 > 0:24:26# Mamma fettuccine. #

0:24:28 > 0:24:31- Now, quite a serious song, though, it seems?- That one?

0:24:31 > 0:24:33I just sing along, but the lyrics, when you look at them,

0:24:33 > 0:24:36they're quite serious, Gary. What's going on here?

0:24:36 > 0:24:39"They took my voice, erased my past."

0:24:39 > 0:24:40So, what's this song about?

0:24:40 > 0:24:43Well, you know, in '99 I lost my record deal,

0:24:43 > 0:24:46and, you know...

0:24:46 > 0:24:5099% of me when we came back

0:24:50 > 0:24:54and started the band again and we were really successful,

0:24:54 > 0:24:5799% was really humble.

0:24:57 > 0:25:01And then the other 1% wanted to write that song.

0:25:01 > 0:25:06And I've waited and waited and when I started my record last year

0:25:06 > 0:25:07it just felt right.

0:25:07 > 0:25:11It just felt right to sort of chronologically document

0:25:11 > 0:25:13what had gone on in those 14 years.

0:25:13 > 0:25:17- Cos, you know...- 14 years? - 14 years, yes.

0:25:17 > 0:25:20- Between that and my last solo record. - Right.

0:25:20 > 0:25:22So, who is this targeted towards?

0:25:22 > 0:25:28I think in this industry you're written off really quickly

0:25:28 > 0:25:32and I think that people barely get a chance to show what they've got

0:25:32 > 0:25:36before they move on to the next one.

0:25:36 > 0:25:39So it's written for all those people who doubt, really.

0:25:39 > 0:25:41Do you think, though, because you've got it back,

0:25:41 > 0:25:46the response, the sort of cinematic ending

0:25:46 > 0:25:47of you getting back with Take That,

0:25:47 > 0:25:51do you think was it almost worth it, those 14 years - or not?

0:25:51 > 0:25:54- Oh, it completely was. - It was.- Completely was.

0:25:54 > 0:25:59Now I look at who I was back in '99 and I look who I am now,

0:25:59 > 0:26:04and I learnt so much about myself in those years.

0:26:04 > 0:26:09And I kind of come back to this... to this job now, really,

0:26:09 > 0:26:14with just a glint of a smile because it's a funny business

0:26:14 > 0:26:17and if you take it too seriously,

0:26:17 > 0:26:19then you are missing out on a lot of enjoyment.

0:26:19 > 0:26:21Just enjoy every day you're here,

0:26:21 > 0:26:23because to me it's a big treat now, this bit.

0:26:23 > 0:26:26And you know what? I know it's not going to last forever,

0:26:26 > 0:26:28but while it's here I'm going to enjoy it.

0:26:28 > 0:26:29Well, you deserve to.

0:26:29 > 0:26:30Now, recent times,

0:26:30 > 0:26:33I wanted to talk about stuff you probably didn't even dream of doing,

0:26:33 > 0:26:36let alone getting back with Take That, and it being so enormous,

0:26:36 > 0:26:38and the huge arena solo tour,

0:26:38 > 0:26:40there's been a bit of royalty in your life.

0:26:40 > 0:26:42- The Jubilee.- The Jubilee.

0:26:42 > 0:26:44For me, those things -

0:26:44 > 0:26:46other than working for the Palace, which is amazing,

0:26:46 > 0:26:50but to be able to call up Elton and Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney

0:26:50 > 0:26:52and say, "Do you want to do this gig?"

0:26:52 > 0:26:53It was amazing.

0:26:53 > 0:26:57- And they all came through.- Yes. Everybody we asked came through.

0:26:57 > 0:27:00Spectacular. And what about the Queen herself, how was that?

0:27:00 > 0:27:01- How was she?- It was great.

0:27:01 > 0:27:03How much contact do you have with the Queen?

0:27:03 > 0:27:05- Was she quite hands on? - Maybe five or six times...

0:27:05 > 0:27:07She was doing the dialling.

0:27:07 > 0:27:09- IMPERSONATES THE QUEEN: - "What's Elton, is he 0207?

0:27:09 > 0:27:11"Hello? I've got Gary Barlow.

0:27:11 > 0:27:13"You do it, you do it. Ask him. I'm too shy, I'm embarrassed."

0:27:15 > 0:27:17So, this is a picture of you actually meeting the Queen.

0:27:17 > 0:27:18There you are.

0:27:18 > 0:27:21The terrible thing about this photo is she thought that was Take That.

0:27:24 > 0:27:26Moments after this she was with Philip, going,

0:27:26 > 0:27:28"I think Howard Donald's aged...

0:27:32 > 0:27:33"Gary's still looking amazing.

0:27:33 > 0:27:36"I just voted for him for Best Haircut Of The Year."

0:27:40 > 0:27:44Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for the fantastic Mr Gary Barlow!

0:27:44 > 0:27:45APPLAUSE

0:27:46 > 0:27:50- Thank you.- Thank you so much.- Cheers.

0:27:50 > 0:27:53- Thank you.- Ladies and gentlemen, the wonderful Gary Barlow!

0:27:53 > 0:27:54Legend!

0:27:54 > 0:27:57What a charming, wonderful man!

0:28:03 > 0:28:04What's that man doing?

0:28:06 > 0:28:07Are you all right? No, you.

0:28:07 > 0:28:10You're holding something. Like a lasso or something.

0:28:12 > 0:28:14What is this? What's the idea here?

0:28:14 > 0:28:16- I hold the cable.- You hold the cable.

0:28:19 > 0:28:20As you move...

0:28:20 > 0:28:23Oh, as he moves, you just let it go...

0:28:31 > 0:28:32Is that really it? That's it?

0:28:32 > 0:28:34And then what happens when you come towards me?

0:28:34 > 0:28:35You've got to coil it back in.

0:28:44 > 0:28:46Pretty easy.

0:28:48 > 0:28:50You look like someone Bear Grylls would meet.

0:28:53 > 0:28:54All right.

0:28:54 > 0:28:56I've got a knife if you want to shave.

0:28:56 > 0:28:57Thank you very much.

0:28:57 > 0:28:59- OK.- All right.

0:29:05 > 0:29:08My next guest is delightful, delicious and downright dishy.

0:29:08 > 0:29:11Her TV cookery shows are watched around the world

0:29:11 > 0:29:12and her books sell like hot cakes.

0:29:12 > 0:29:15She's the princess of the pantry, the cream of the crop,

0:29:15 > 0:29:17the cherry on the cake.

0:29:17 > 0:29:19Let's hear it for the Domestic Goddess herself,

0:29:19 > 0:29:22the wonderful Nigella Lawson is here!

0:29:22 > 0:29:25# Sugar

0:29:25 > 0:29:27- # Oh, honey, honey... # - Nigella!

0:29:30 > 0:29:32# You are my candy girl

0:29:32 > 0:29:35# And you got me wanting you... #

0:29:35 > 0:29:36Nigella!

0:29:38 > 0:29:41- # Sugar... # - I'd sing, but I can't.

0:29:41 > 0:29:43Darling, I've brought something for you.

0:29:43 > 0:29:45- Something for me?- Yeah.

0:29:45 > 0:29:47Ooh! This is exciting. It comes in a little bag.

0:29:47 > 0:29:48Did you make this?

0:29:48 > 0:29:51I did, though not initially for you.

0:29:51 > 0:29:53LAUGHTER

0:29:53 > 0:29:54Were they for Peter Kay?

0:29:56 > 0:29:58Sea-salted...

0:29:58 > 0:29:59- Sea-salted fudge.- Amazing.

0:29:59 > 0:30:01Is this made by your hand?

0:30:01 > 0:30:04- Yeah, and burns to show. - Oh, this is amazing!

0:30:04 > 0:30:07- I'm saying it's amazing before I've tasted it.- Lot of sugar.

0:30:07 > 0:30:10- With sea salt on the top. - Is that what fudge is? Just sugar?

0:30:10 > 0:30:12- Sugar and fat.- Great.

0:30:12 > 0:30:15LAUGHTER

0:30:15 > 0:30:18Mm. Oh! Oh!

0:30:18 > 0:30:21- That's really sweet.- Yes, it is. - Can you tell me how you make this?

0:30:21 > 0:30:24- Cos I don't know anything about cooking.- Do you really want to know

0:30:24 > 0:30:29- or are you just passing the time so you can chew?- No!- OK.

0:30:29 > 0:30:33- You put butter, condensed milk and sugar...- Settle in. Tell me.

0:30:33 > 0:30:35..and Golden Syrup.

0:30:35 > 0:30:40- Mm?- In a pan. Let it boil for a long time, stirring, stirring, stirring.

0:30:40 > 0:30:42- You do so much stirring, don't you? - A lot of stirring.

0:30:42 > 0:30:45Tell me about stirring. Do you do that with both hands or...?

0:30:45 > 0:30:46I can do it with both hands, yes.

0:30:46 > 0:30:49So, with your left hand... Whisking is the thing.

0:30:49 > 0:30:51That's the really hard one, isn't it?

0:30:51 > 0:30:54- Well, I'm slightly ambidextrous. - Do you use a...

0:30:54 > 0:30:57- HE MAKES MACHINE NOISE - ..or do you do it manually?

0:30:57 > 0:30:59It, you know, depends how I feel.

0:30:59 > 0:31:01- What, the manual or the... - HE MAKES MACHINE NOISE

0:31:01 > 0:31:02Why are you giggling?

0:31:02 > 0:31:04LAUGHTER

0:31:04 > 0:31:07- This is the problem, Nigella, you're so sexual!- I'm not!

0:31:07 > 0:31:10- I'm not saying anything!- That's the thing, I know. I know. It's right.

0:31:10 > 0:31:13You don't mean to be, do you? Is that true, though?

0:31:13 > 0:31:16I am quite prissy, actually.

0:31:16 > 0:31:18- Prissy?- Prissy.- Yeah.

0:31:18 > 0:31:21Everything you say, I can't cope with it!

0:31:21 > 0:31:26LAUGHTER

0:31:26 > 0:31:28I like ejecting the whisks.

0:31:28 > 0:31:31- Oh, yes, cos you... - You just do that and they go pitow!

0:31:31 > 0:31:34- When you're whisking like that...- No!

0:31:34 > 0:31:36- Because if you're whisking by hand...- Is it beating?

0:31:36 > 0:31:42- Beating is more...like, with a wooden spoon.- OK. So, you beat like this.

0:31:42 > 0:31:44- You don't have to be that frenetic.- OK.

0:31:46 > 0:31:51Cos it's quite a magical moment when it...solidifies.

0:31:51 > 0:31:54- When it hardens. - When what hardens?

0:31:54 > 0:31:58The... The... The yolk. The-the egg whites.

0:31:58 > 0:32:02- When it becomes stiff.- Egg whites... You're talking about meringues?

0:32:02 > 0:32:06- No, but, isn't it egg whites, they become stiff?- They do, they do,

0:32:06 > 0:32:09and that definitely IS with a whisk.

0:32:09 > 0:32:12Do you think it's like a magical moment? Cos it just turns.

0:32:12 > 0:32:14You don't think it's going to turn and then it just goes - oh!

0:32:14 > 0:32:17I think all baking is rather magical.

0:32:17 > 0:32:21I mean, because I've cooked all my life

0:32:21 > 0:32:24and I came to baking relatively late in life.

0:32:24 > 0:32:28If you're making a stew, you understand that

0:32:28 > 0:32:33if you put some beef and some leeks and some carrots,

0:32:33 > 0:32:36you can understand in its raw state that it will be a stew.

0:32:36 > 0:32:39You understand that, it makes sense.

0:32:39 > 0:32:43But there is something extraordinary, that if you just have eggs

0:32:43 > 0:32:46and flour and sugar and butter, these disparate elements,

0:32:46 > 0:32:51you mix them together, put them in the oven, and it's a cake.

0:32:51 > 0:32:53So, one feels a bit like an alchemist.

0:32:53 > 0:32:56I always think it's a mixture of chemistry and poetry.

0:32:56 > 0:32:57And what about the Great British Bake Off?

0:32:57 > 0:32:59It's become this phenomenon.

0:32:59 > 0:33:02- I love it.- Why do you think people love it so much?

0:33:02 > 0:33:04Is it just watching that transformation?

0:33:04 > 0:33:05Cos you don't get to eat the cake.

0:33:05 > 0:33:08Well, you don't get to eat it but

0:33:08 > 0:33:11I think it is interesting to see.

0:33:11 > 0:33:16It's not the sort of baking I could do because I'm a bit haphazard

0:33:16 > 0:33:20and the idea of making 18 biscuits which look identical,

0:33:20 > 0:33:23whereas, you know, it's, like, smaller, bigger.

0:33:23 > 0:33:28I feel it's so important not to put people off cooking.

0:33:28 > 0:33:31Actually, if you needed to be an expert we'd have all fallen

0:33:31 > 0:33:35out of the evolutionary loop a long time ago.

0:33:35 > 0:33:39- Also, the masses aren't experts, so it's fun.- Nor should you be.

0:33:39 > 0:33:44It's really strange in the modern world that there are two areas

0:33:44 > 0:33:47which people seem to look for experts all the time.

0:33:47 > 0:33:52And yet they're the two areas which guarantee our survival,

0:33:52 > 0:33:55and that is in child rearing and cooking.

0:33:55 > 0:33:57And yet everyone looks for experts

0:33:57 > 0:33:59but it isn't really a field where expertise really helps that much.

0:33:59 > 0:34:02It's natural. It's the most natural thing.

0:34:02 > 0:34:05- And impossible as well. That's fine, that's life.- I don't cook.

0:34:05 > 0:34:07I'm an eater.

0:34:07 > 0:34:10- Eating is very important. - You love eating.- I do love eating.

0:34:10 > 0:34:12That's where it all stemmed from.

0:34:12 > 0:34:16- Eating.- Yes. My view is that you can

0:34:16 > 0:34:21eat without loving cooking.

0:34:21 > 0:34:25But to cook and enjoy it, you have to love eating.

0:34:25 > 0:34:27So, eating is the important thing.

0:34:27 > 0:34:31I think I can't cook because...I'm too hungry...

0:34:31 > 0:34:33the whole time.

0:34:33 > 0:34:34I pick.

0:34:34 > 0:34:39- I'd have all the ingredients and I'd slowly eat them in that order.- No.

0:34:39 > 0:34:43Picking does rather destroy the pleasure of eating, sometimes.

0:34:43 > 0:34:45You're right about this. How do I stop picking?

0:34:45 > 0:34:49I have two children and I have tried this so many times -

0:34:49 > 0:34:53I cannot walk past a chicken nugget...

0:34:53 > 0:34:54No-one can.

0:34:54 > 0:34:59I have to say, when my children were small, everyone else would say,

0:34:59 > 0:35:01"You must eat up." And I kept saying, "Have you finished now?"

0:35:01 > 0:35:06- So I could just grab the ends. - I always take what they've left.

0:35:06 > 0:35:08I like eating off other people's plates.

0:35:08 > 0:35:11Sometimes I have it before them.

0:35:11 > 0:35:13That's fine, that's fine.

0:35:13 > 0:35:18- He's like, "I'm hungry." It's like, "No. There's no dinner now."- Tough.

0:35:18 > 0:35:21Let me tell you about the first time I became aware of you.

0:35:21 > 0:35:25It was that bit at the end of the show where you go to the fridge.

0:35:25 > 0:35:27Was that at the end of the credits?

0:35:27 > 0:35:29After the credits.

0:35:29 > 0:35:33- They were brilliant. That's what I could relate to.- Everyone does that.

0:35:33 > 0:35:36- Do you do that every night? - I don't do it every night.

0:35:36 > 0:35:41It's not part of my routine, but sometimes I do make double visits.

0:35:41 > 0:35:44- Yeah.- That is the difficulty.

0:35:44 > 0:35:48- But you don't even know what you're after.- No, that's the thrill.

0:35:48 > 0:35:52It's opening the fridge and seeing this whole world of possibilities.

0:35:52 > 0:35:55That's what you see through your Nigella Lawson eyes.

0:35:55 > 0:36:01What I see is, "Oh, I got a bit of pesto...I've got a bit of ham.

0:36:01 > 0:36:04"I'm going to have pesto-ham."

0:36:04 > 0:36:07The thing is... Do you have bread?

0:36:07 > 0:36:09If you have bread and butter, you've got a sandwich there.

0:36:09 > 0:36:12But I'm only functioning at the fridge. I don't go over there.

0:36:12 > 0:36:14Once I'm there, the door's open.

0:36:14 > 0:36:19- Do you have a beep on your fridge? - I've disabled it.

0:36:19 > 0:36:22That's brilliant. Cos my fridge is always...

0:36:22 > 0:36:26Stop nagging me! I haven't decided yet!

0:36:26 > 0:36:29- What?- The fridge, not you. - Oh, sorry!

0:36:32 > 0:36:36You're right, it nags you. It beeps. Cos I thought it was always on.

0:36:36 > 0:36:40The fridge door's open so much in my house - beep! Beep! Beep!

0:36:40 > 0:36:42- So rude.- I know. - Is it a German fridge?

0:36:42 > 0:36:45- Yeah, it goes -- HARSHER TONE: - Beep! Beep! Beep!

0:36:45 > 0:36:49- Not bad.- I don't know if my fridge is German.

0:36:49 > 0:36:52Somebody recommended a fridge that actually makes a noise.

0:36:52 > 0:36:55You can put something on the fridge and it snorts like a pig.

0:36:55 > 0:36:58That would be so tiresome after a couple of days.

0:36:58 > 0:37:01But it's supposed to make you feel you've eaten too much.

0:37:01 > 0:37:03MAKES PIG NOISE

0:37:03 > 0:37:07- For me, it would make me want a bacon sandwich.- Me too!

0:37:07 > 0:37:09We should talk about your cook books.

0:37:09 > 0:37:11This is How To Be A Domestic Goddess.

0:37:11 > 0:37:15Which has been reissued. Now, I have no idea what that means.

0:37:15 > 0:37:18- Got a new cover, love. - It's got a new cover!

0:37:20 > 0:37:23- OK.- There's going to be a uniform edition.

0:37:23 > 0:37:27Some of them I've done new introductions... And new end papers.

0:37:27 > 0:37:32OK. So, it's not that you put the wrong recipes in originally?

0:37:32 > 0:37:34You didn't think,

0:37:34 > 0:37:36"Sorry, there should actually be salt in that one."

0:37:36 > 0:37:40Well, that's happened over the years, but not particularly now.

0:37:40 > 0:37:43But you - and I love this when I found out you did this -

0:37:43 > 0:37:46you tweet a lot of the things you eat.

0:37:46 > 0:37:50- You're photographing your food. - That's all I do, really.

0:37:50 > 0:37:53This is earlier, this is lunch. You probably recognise this from lunch.

0:37:53 > 0:37:56I can walk you through it. Rib eye steak - black and blue.

0:37:56 > 0:37:59Not quite black enough but it was delicious.

0:37:59 > 0:38:04- Chips. I like a fat chip, I don't like American fries so much.- OK.

0:38:04 > 0:38:07And broccoli with lemon and chilli.

0:38:07 > 0:38:10And you've said, "Was in danger of getting hangry."

0:38:10 > 0:38:13- Hungry and angry.- It's a lovely word.

0:38:13 > 0:38:18I am so hangry. I wake up hangry.

0:38:18 > 0:38:21- It was about four o'clock. - So, when do you get hangry?

0:38:21 > 0:38:24What's the difference between hungry and hangry?

0:38:24 > 0:38:27Well, actually, not much. I do feel...

0:38:27 > 0:38:32My agent says, for women, "Hunger is always an emergency."

0:38:32 > 0:38:34And I think there's something in that.

0:38:34 > 0:38:36I'm really very equable.

0:38:36 > 0:38:38And I don't have a temper.

0:38:38 > 0:38:44But if I'm not fed, I am both murderous and suicidal.

0:38:44 > 0:38:47- Wow, you want to murder yourself? - Yes.

0:38:47 > 0:38:49I cant...

0:38:49 > 0:38:52Now I've learnt,

0:38:52 > 0:38:55so just before I ate today I said, "I'm shutting down.

0:38:55 > 0:38:57"No-one talk to me.

0:38:57 > 0:39:02"I've gone without food for too long and I will be cranky

0:39:02 > 0:39:04"and I could be rude.

0:39:04 > 0:39:07"So, please, carry on without me until I've been given food."

0:39:07 > 0:39:09- And this did the job?- Yes.

0:39:09 > 0:39:12Let's talk about your life at the moment.

0:39:12 > 0:39:15Where are you living? What's going on?

0:39:15 > 0:39:18Well, I'm alive. I don't really want to say where I live.

0:39:18 > 0:39:21- I think that would be a foolish thing.- I'm not your cab driver.

0:39:21 > 0:39:24I was wondering about your living arrangements cos

0:39:24 > 0:39:27- I heard you were looking for a place to live.- Think I've found somewhere.

0:39:27 > 0:39:29And what's the kitchen like?

0:39:29 > 0:39:31Kitchen's good but I can make it better.

0:39:31 > 0:39:34So, how are you, though, in your life?

0:39:34 > 0:39:37How are you feeling? Cos I have to say, you seem wonderful.

0:39:37 > 0:39:40Well, you know... I've had better times.

0:39:40 > 0:39:44But, yeah, it's spring, I'm feeling better and I'm very happy to be here.

0:39:44 > 0:39:50Life has its dips and it can get better and...

0:39:50 > 0:39:52You know, you can't fight it.

0:39:53 > 0:39:56Have you felt the unbelievable amount of support that you have?

0:39:56 > 0:39:58Have you felt that?

0:39:58 > 0:40:03Um...I try not to live in the public sphere very much.

0:40:03 > 0:40:07Yes, I have, but the thing is, however you live,

0:40:07 > 0:40:11you have your own life and you're the person inside, so...

0:40:11 > 0:40:14If anything, all I've done is stop reading newspapers.

0:40:14 > 0:40:17Which I find difficult cos I was a journalist for so long

0:40:17 > 0:40:19and I'm a bit of a print fanatic.

0:40:19 > 0:40:25But of all the things to go, that's relatively all right.

0:40:25 > 0:40:29You say you're a journalist, you're in that game,

0:40:29 > 0:40:31- you have a lot of friends in journalism.- Yeah.

0:40:31 > 0:40:36And everything got flipped upside down and you're at the centre

0:40:36 > 0:40:43of a media storm and it's being fed by that, by journalism.

0:40:43 > 0:40:44I mean, how does that feel?

0:40:46 > 0:40:49I'm not an innocent. I understand how it works.

0:40:49 > 0:40:52I just...don't involve myself.

0:40:52 > 0:40:56I don't speak and I don't comment.

0:40:56 > 0:41:00I could say things and they would be indiscrete and I don't want to.

0:41:00 > 0:41:04But the real truth is that...

0:41:04 > 0:41:08if you don't read things and you don't get too involved, it doesn't

0:41:08 > 0:41:11enter your bloodstream, and you're not contaminated.

0:41:11 > 0:41:15But what I've found since then is that it's given me

0:41:15 > 0:41:21a far too sensitised reaction to...um...

0:41:21 > 0:41:25newspapers and when I see journalists being cruel

0:41:25 > 0:41:28about other people's misfortunes.

0:41:28 > 0:41:31Cos you can... You can survive anything yourself.

0:41:31 > 0:41:35But when I see other people's private lives being

0:41:35 > 0:41:38treated in a cavalier way, I feel I can't read this.

0:41:38 > 0:41:40I don't want to be colluding with it.

0:41:40 > 0:41:42You start to realise how that feels.

0:41:42 > 0:41:46I think you always do realise but you also understand that

0:41:46 > 0:41:51you have a responsibility not necessarily to be part of it.

0:41:51 > 0:41:54But...I don't know. I think that...

0:41:54 > 0:41:56There's gossip.

0:41:56 > 0:41:58It is and we all like gossiping in our own lives,

0:41:58 > 0:42:01so I don't take a lofty view.

0:42:01 > 0:42:06I just perhaps feel, you know, having had a layer of skin removed,

0:42:06 > 0:42:13I'm more sensitive to other people's misfortunes.

0:42:13 > 0:42:16You say with life and ups and downs of life, because it is gossip,

0:42:16 > 0:42:20it's important to you but it's not important to everybody else

0:42:20 > 0:42:22so much because it's like gossip.

0:42:22 > 0:42:26And things do move on. They just move on. Amazingly.

0:42:26 > 0:42:29I certainly know that if I read something in a magazine

0:42:29 > 0:42:32about someone, I can't remember, so why would they remember about me?

0:42:32 > 0:42:36But it is true and you have to remember that.

0:42:36 > 0:42:41I really think that if the major thing in your life is what

0:42:41 > 0:42:45people who don't know you think, then you're living your life wrong.

0:42:45 > 0:42:49I often do say things or do things maybe I regret later

0:42:49 > 0:42:53but on the other hand, I'd rather embarrass myself or just be

0:42:53 > 0:42:55a bit idiotic sometimes

0:42:55 > 0:42:58than spend my whole life worrying about what people think or

0:42:58 > 0:43:01- what I'm going to say. - You never win like that.

0:43:01 > 0:43:02I don't think anyone can win.

0:43:02 > 0:43:04I always worry about what I'm going to say all the time.

0:43:04 > 0:43:07- But it doesn't help!- But neither of us ever stop ourselves.

0:43:07 > 0:43:09- We may worry but we don't stop ourselves.- No.

0:43:09 > 0:43:11- I talk too much.- I talk too much.

0:43:11 > 0:43:13What my grandmother used to call "overtalking."

0:43:13 > 0:43:18Yes, and that is true, and things move on and it's so important and

0:43:18 > 0:43:20it's deep and hurtful and difficult

0:43:20 > 0:43:24but it is, in the public domain, it's gossip, it's trivial.

0:43:24 > 0:43:28It's horrible to be part of that. But you move on.

0:43:28 > 0:43:30Have you ever thought about doing Thought For The Day?

0:43:30 > 0:43:32My thought for the day right now is,

0:43:32 > 0:43:35- "Move on to something funny." - OK, come on!

0:43:35 > 0:43:36OK, let's do that.

0:43:36 > 0:43:39- So, you found a place. Did you see a lot?- Lots.

0:43:39 > 0:43:42It's quite stressful that, isn't it?

0:43:42 > 0:43:46Yeah, but I'm also quite nosy so I like looking at other people's homes.

0:43:46 > 0:43:50Tell me honestly, of all the houses you looked at,

0:43:50 > 0:43:53what percentage of them had your books?

0:43:53 > 0:43:55LAUGHTER

0:43:55 > 0:43:58Do you walk in and go, "Yeah, OK."

0:43:58 > 0:44:01No, I don't look...

0:44:01 > 0:44:03I don't look for it.

0:44:03 > 0:44:06But when I go into the kitchen I notice if they're there or not.

0:44:06 > 0:44:09- You look for it. - I don't, actually.

0:44:09 > 0:44:14I don't because when I'm looking I'm thinking, "Could I live here?

0:44:14 > 0:44:15"Is this OK?"

0:44:15 > 0:44:19- And then... Obviously I notice. - Yeah.

0:44:19 > 0:44:24But what I find really difficult is when people get apologetic.

0:44:24 > 0:44:27- And I feel like, "No, it's quite all right."- You say that...

0:44:27 > 0:44:30- but it hurts, it's annoying. - It doesn't hurt.

0:44:30 > 0:44:32There's Ramsay and Oliver. You're like, "I'm not living here!"

0:44:34 > 0:44:37Nigella, thank you so much for coming on my show.

0:44:37 > 0:44:40It's a real pleasure and, you know,

0:44:40 > 0:44:44it's such a great thrill to see you looking so well and back

0:44:44 > 0:44:46and gorgeous and yourself.

0:44:46 > 0:44:49- Just great to see you.- Thank you. - Thanks very much.

0:44:49 > 0:44:50The lovely Nigella Lawson.

0:44:50 > 0:44:52I love Nigella!

0:44:52 > 0:44:53Thank you so much!

0:44:55 > 0:44:56Sorry, I'm in high heels.

0:44:57 > 0:45:00Nigella. Amazing! Come on!

0:45:06 > 0:45:09Ladies and gentlemen, a huge thanks to all my guests tonight.

0:45:09 > 0:45:11We had the wonderful Bear Grylls! Come on!

0:45:14 > 0:45:16Gary Barlow was here!

0:45:18 > 0:45:21And the gorgeous and fantastic Nigella Lawson!

0:45:23 > 0:45:25Join me next week when my guests will be Ray Winstone,

0:45:25 > 0:45:27Holly Willoughby and Dynamo!

0:45:27 > 0:45:29Thank you for watching. Good night. Bravo!