0:00:02 > 0:00:03Now, on Top Gear...
0:00:03 > 0:00:05It's all about value.
0:00:05 > 0:00:07Don't act like you're not impressed!
0:00:07 > 0:00:11- Oh, yeah!- Rutledge finds the car bargain of the year.
0:00:11 > 0:00:13I'm coming for you, Gramps!
0:00:13 > 0:00:18And we race 500 miles up the California coast in cars we bought for 500.
0:00:18 > 0:00:21- Bloodstains?- Somebody died!
0:00:40 > 0:00:44Welcome to Top Gear. Today, we are all about cheap cars.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47Now, what do you guys think the cheapest you can pay for a running car is?
0:00:47 > 0:00:50AUDIENCE SHOUT NUMBERS
0:00:50 > 0:00:521,500?
0:00:55 > 0:00:57He said 1,500. You're the king of Craigslist.
0:00:57 > 0:01:00What's the cheapest car you'd buy?
0:01:00 > 0:01:02I bought a bunch for cheap, but they didn't run.
0:01:02 > 0:01:07I mean, I'm talking about a car you would take across the country, like, trust on a road trip.
0:01:07 > 0:01:11- Oh, bare minimum, probably a thousand bucks.- A thousand bucks?- Sounds about right.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13Well, we wanted to see how low we could actually go,
0:01:13 > 0:01:15so we decided to have a race.
0:01:15 > 0:01:19500 miles in cars we spent no more than 500 on.
0:01:21 > 0:01:22The cheapest brand-new car
0:01:22 > 0:01:26you can buy in this country is around 11 grand,
0:01:26 > 0:01:30and you can get a reliable used car for about 5,000 bucks.
0:01:31 > 0:01:33But what happens if you have less than that to spend?
0:01:33 > 0:01:35Much less.
0:01:35 > 0:01:38Can you still get a car that works?
0:01:40 > 0:01:43To find out, we were each given 500 to buy a car,
0:01:43 > 0:01:46and told to meet up in Santa Monica, California.
0:01:49 > 0:01:51I used to flip cars in college,
0:01:51 > 0:01:53and I've owned eight that cost less than 500 bucks,
0:01:53 > 0:01:55and I know what you're looking for.
0:01:55 > 0:01:58You want cheap, reliable and simple.
0:01:58 > 0:02:01Enter the Ford Festiva.
0:02:01 > 0:02:041,800 lbs of honest reliability.
0:02:04 > 0:02:09Now, it's got 227,000 miles on it, but it's got a new engine in it,
0:02:09 > 0:02:12so I think it's ready to go another 200,000 miles.
0:02:12 > 0:02:13It may look like a total piece of crap,
0:02:13 > 0:02:17but it's actually a huge piece of crap.
0:02:27 > 0:02:29- Don't act like you're not impressed. - Oh, my God!
0:02:29 > 0:02:32- What happened to this side? - That is not the pretty side.
0:02:32 > 0:02:34That's the 500 side, clearly!
0:02:34 > 0:02:39This is a 190E, 1989, staple of the Mercedes line-up.
0:02:39 > 0:02:43- This is back when they were really sweet.- I can't believe it.
0:02:43 > 0:02:46And you found yourself a Micro Machine with 12-inch wheels.
0:02:46 > 0:02:50These are pretty different from what we usually choose. What's that say about Adam?
0:02:50 > 0:02:54I think Adam's still going to go for an old piece of crap. Something big and old.
0:02:58 > 0:03:03Better than you can even imagine. That is a taxi!
0:03:03 > 0:03:06Just when you think he couldn't make any worse decisions,
0:03:06 > 0:03:09he goes out and buys a taxi for 500!
0:03:09 > 0:03:10Ah?
0:03:12 > 0:03:17- Ah?- 1994 Ford Crown Victoria. The workhorse.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20Look inside of this thing. Look at it!
0:03:20 > 0:03:23I can't believe you kept the little bacteria sponge
0:03:23 > 0:03:24on the steering wheel, for one.
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Look at the back seat.
0:03:26 > 0:03:29People have had sex in this car, they have thrown up in this car.
0:03:29 > 0:03:31- How does it smell, Rutledge? - What's the huge stain?
0:03:31 > 0:03:34Look, he's got the nose of a German Shepherd. What is it like in there?
0:03:34 > 0:03:38This car carries humans, humans have fluids, sometimes they get out. No big deal.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40How many miles are on this thing?
0:03:40 > 0:03:42425,000 miles.
0:03:42 > 0:03:45You know how many times around the earth that is?
0:03:47 > 0:03:49No.
0:03:49 > 0:03:53OK, gentlemen. Let's see what we're doing with these hot rods.
0:03:53 > 0:03:56"The true test of your 500 cars is to race them
0:03:56 > 0:04:00"500 miles to Twin Peaks in San Francisco."
0:04:02 > 0:04:06"But first, cars this cheap are unreliable, and sometimes need help.
0:04:06 > 0:04:09"So, to see who chose the best cheap car,
0:04:09 > 0:04:12"you'll race 100 yards across this parking lot...
0:04:13 > 0:04:17- "..pushing your cars."- Ha-ha-ha!
0:04:17 > 0:04:20- First to the other end wins. - Oh, this is going to be fun!
0:04:20 > 0:04:25- First one to the black line, right there.- OK. Who's going to call it?
0:04:25 > 0:04:28- Have you guys looked at the beach here?- Yeah, it's nice.- It is...
0:04:28 > 0:04:30Ready, set, go!
0:04:30 > 0:04:32You're already cheating!
0:04:34 > 0:04:36Oh, this is great.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38- Adam, how's it going back there? - Fine!
0:04:38 > 0:04:41Just going for a little jog, fellas. Don't mind me.
0:04:41 > 0:04:44Adam, you're going to hit me!
0:04:44 > 0:04:47I think you helped me, Adam. Thank you.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49The Festiva roars ahead.
0:04:50 > 0:04:521,800 lbs.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55Pure awesomeness.
0:04:55 > 0:04:59Hey, hey, look out! Don't...
0:04:59 > 0:05:02- Not cool, man!- Oh, sorry, I hit you.- I beat you!
0:05:04 > 0:05:08- I think he's driving it. - Seems like he's cheating.
0:05:09 > 0:05:14- You won. You happy?- Yeah.- It's like "Everybody gets a trophy", so he won.
0:05:14 > 0:05:16- Oh, that's nice(!) - Good job. We're going 500 miles.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19Get on the road, boys. Let's go. Mount up.
0:05:19 > 0:05:21Follow this winner of a car!
0:05:21 > 0:05:23Yeah(!) Winner.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26'Rutledge may have won the first challenge,
0:05:26 > 0:05:28'but the race to San Francisco had just begun.
0:05:30 > 0:05:33'The first leg of the race would be from Santa Monica to Santa Barbara,
0:05:33 > 0:05:37'then through Santa Cruz to the finish in San Francisco.
0:05:37 > 0:05:41'The car that made it to Twin Peaks first would win.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43'This route required our cars
0:05:43 > 0:05:46'to withstand long stretches of highway,
0:05:46 > 0:05:49'elevation changes and stop-and-go traffic -
0:05:49 > 0:05:53'the worst possible conditions for cheap cars.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56'And Tanner's Mercedes was not off to a good start.'
0:05:56 > 0:05:58ENGINE SPLUTTERS
0:05:58 > 0:06:01Come on. Come on, don't go out this way.
0:06:01 > 0:06:04'I, on the other hand, was loving my ride'.
0:06:04 > 0:06:08There's something great about owning a 500 car.
0:06:08 > 0:06:11You don't have to worry about payments, the insurance is low,
0:06:11 > 0:06:15you don't care about dings or dents, you don't have to worry where you park it,
0:06:15 > 0:06:18you never have to wash it, and if it breaks down,
0:06:18 > 0:06:21that's where you leave it... and call a cab.
0:06:21 > 0:06:22That's kind of ironic.
0:06:22 > 0:06:26Taxi cabs and law enforcement agencies love Crown Vics
0:06:26 > 0:06:28because they're tough and easy to fix.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31LA Police Department even has a frame straightener.
0:06:31 > 0:06:35They go out and mangle these things up, bring them back to headquarters,
0:06:35 > 0:06:37straighten out the frames and send them out again.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40So, how does my survivor drive? I'll be honest with you,
0:06:40 > 0:06:42the suspension isn't tired, it's exhausted.
0:06:42 > 0:06:46There's a several minute delay between steering input
0:06:46 > 0:06:47and actual turning.
0:06:48 > 0:06:51Look at this. I'm still going straight.
0:06:51 > 0:06:54What do you want for 500 bucks?
0:06:54 > 0:06:57And Tanner shows up in that Mercedes,
0:06:57 > 0:07:00he looks like an ambassador for a sad, broke-ass country.
0:07:00 > 0:07:04You got it. You can do it, you can do it. Yes!
0:07:04 > 0:07:06ENGINE STARTS
0:07:10 > 0:07:14'My Mercedes finally came to life, and now I was in last place,
0:07:14 > 0:07:16'but that would be no problem for the Merc.
0:07:16 > 0:07:18'She may not be as pretty as she once was,
0:07:18 > 0:07:23'but at least she wasn't ridiculous, like Rutledge's little toy car.'
0:07:23 > 0:07:26It's funny, if you look at cars throughout history,
0:07:26 > 0:07:29there are a few that are really iconic,
0:07:29 > 0:07:32and they keep being made for years and years afterwards,
0:07:32 > 0:07:35like the original Volkswagen Beetle was made up until
0:07:35 > 0:07:40the late 2000s in Mexico, or the Volkswagen Rabbit,
0:07:40 > 0:07:43the first one, was still being made in South Africa, and other places.
0:07:43 > 0:07:47This car is still being produced in Iran.
0:07:47 > 0:07:49Yep.
0:07:49 > 0:07:51Still being produced.
0:07:53 > 0:07:57The reason this car is going to make it the 500 miles is simple -
0:07:57 > 0:07:59it's the best car here.
0:07:59 > 0:08:01There's not a whole lot to this car,
0:08:01 > 0:08:04but there's not a whole lot that can go wrong.
0:08:04 > 0:08:08Keep gas in it, don't overheat it, change the oil.
0:08:09 > 0:08:11The Ford Festiva.
0:08:11 > 0:08:16'The best thing about my Festiva was that it was beating Tanner's Benz.'
0:08:16 > 0:08:19There are two things you never want to touch
0:08:19 > 0:08:24with your bare hands - the steering wheel in a 500 car,
0:08:24 > 0:08:27and the remote control in a cheap hotel. I'm just saying.
0:08:27 > 0:08:29HORN BLARES
0:08:29 > 0:08:35The advantage of buying a 500 car with leather, or even vinyl,
0:08:35 > 0:08:37is that you can clean it.
0:08:37 > 0:08:40The surface is made to repel bacteria.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42It's leather, it's the skin of a beast.
0:08:42 > 0:08:46- CAR VIBRATES - OK, that is some serious vibration, right there.
0:08:46 > 0:08:48Let's just hope we can go 500 miles.
0:08:56 > 0:09:00'My Mercedes might not have gotten off to the best start,
0:09:00 > 0:09:02'but for 500, she was doing great,
0:09:02 > 0:09:05'and it didn't take me long to catch up.'
0:09:12 > 0:09:16- Oh, whoa. - How are those bumps, Rutledge?
0:09:16 > 0:09:21Totally fine, not checking my fillings right now at all.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26'We were surrounded by gorgeous scenery,
0:09:26 > 0:09:30'driving on one of the most beautiful stretches of road in the world.
0:09:30 > 0:09:35'Perfect for luxurious sports cars - and there WE were!'
0:09:35 > 0:09:40There's one thing I have plenty of in here, it's dog hair!
0:09:40 > 0:09:43Oh, my God, that's gross.
0:09:45 > 0:09:50It's not much to look at, and it's obviously in some real disrepair.
0:09:50 > 0:09:57The AC, not even remotely cold. It doesn't go very fast.
0:09:57 > 0:10:01There's stains all over the seats and the floor.
0:10:03 > 0:10:05The steering wheel smells terrible.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09'But, as bad as my car was, it was still better than the other cars.'
0:10:09 > 0:10:13It doesn't have nearly a half a million miles on it,
0:10:13 > 0:10:16that were driven by cabbies and police officers.
0:10:16 > 0:10:18Ow!
0:10:19 > 0:10:23It hasn't been waiting to be crushed in a junkyard,
0:10:23 > 0:10:25like Tanner's Mercedes.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28- CAR VIBRATES - Oh, my gosh.
0:10:28 > 0:10:33It's a perfect cherry of a Ford Festiva.
0:10:34 > 0:10:38'I was living my biggest nightmare - gorgeous winding roads ahead of me,
0:10:38 > 0:10:42'but stuck for miles in a no-passing zone behind the Crown Vic
0:10:42 > 0:10:46'and Rutledge's little toy. Both going way under the speed limit.
0:10:46 > 0:10:49'As soon as I saw an opening to pass them, I took it.'
0:10:49 > 0:10:55All right, finally getting to open the Mercedes up. 60, 65, 70.
0:10:55 > 0:11:01'Oh, you know you're jealous!' Yeah! It's fast.
0:11:02 > 0:11:04'Battered, bruised and wheezy as the Merc was,
0:11:04 > 0:11:07'it still had some power left, and I took the lead,
0:11:07 > 0:11:10'and won the first leg of the race to Santa Barbara.'
0:11:10 > 0:11:16- What are we doing here? - Well, we've got these, and this.
0:11:16 > 0:11:18OK, looks uncomfortable.
0:11:18 > 0:11:21"A cheap car is only good as long as you can hold onto it.
0:11:21 > 0:11:24"To see which of you chose the most secure vehicle,
0:11:24 > 0:11:28"you will now attempt to break into each other's cars.
0:11:28 > 0:11:32- "Whoever can break in first wins." - I'll take the Festiva.
0:11:32 > 0:11:33I'll take the taxi.
0:11:33 > 0:11:37- That gives me that.- All right, here we go.- Start right now?- Yeah.
0:11:37 > 0:11:41You know how I know I'm going to win? Nobody would feel the need
0:11:41 > 0:11:43to design any kind of anti-theft device for this.
0:11:43 > 0:11:46'Rutledge's car would be no problem to break into.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49'It's pretty much made completely out of plastic.
0:11:49 > 0:11:53'The taxi looks a bit tougher, but Adam would have the hardest time
0:11:53 > 0:11:56with my German engineered Mercedes.'
0:11:56 > 0:12:00- I've got to get this down in there. - There it is. Oh, I pushed it down.
0:12:00 > 0:12:04- Oh, I'm so close. - Come on. Come on, get in there.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08Oh, oh, I've got movement.
0:12:08 > 0:12:11And then at some point you just get frustrated,
0:12:11 > 0:12:13and you just sort of shake it around.
0:12:13 > 0:12:16Enough of this.
0:12:16 > 0:12:18Look at that, look at that, come on.
0:12:18 > 0:12:23Breaking into a car, with a coat hanger...
0:12:23 > 0:12:26- Adam, I'm about to unlock the chamber of death, here.- Yeah.
0:12:26 > 0:12:32- Are you really that close? - Yes, I got the pin wiggling.
0:12:35 > 0:12:37- Adam! What!- What's wrong with you?
0:12:40 > 0:12:45- I win.- That doesn't seem fair at all. - No way, that doesn't count.
0:12:45 > 0:12:48What, are you playing for second place? Come on, let's go.
0:12:48 > 0:12:54- Come on, come on.- Great, you got second place. Wonderful.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57That's not second place, you broke the window on my car.
0:12:57 > 0:13:00- Yeah, I win, let's go.- He cheated. - Are you kidding me?- What?
0:13:00 > 0:13:05- That does not count.- You can't just break the window.- Course it counts. I got in. It said we had to get in.
0:13:05 > 0:13:08Such a New Yorker.
0:13:18 > 0:13:20How could you do that to my car?
0:13:20 > 0:13:22Look, a challenge is a challenge, I got into the car, I win.
0:13:22 > 0:13:25How is it you have moved from destroying your own cars to
0:13:25 > 0:13:27now destroying other people's cars?
0:13:27 > 0:13:30I was given a challenge, and I chose a method, and it worked.
0:13:30 > 0:13:35Like when you jumped the Coupe de Ville, you chose to bend it into a banana.
0:13:35 > 0:13:38I chose to jump it. The Caddie bent itself when it landed.
0:13:38 > 0:13:40You killed it.
0:13:40 > 0:13:44It turns out you're not the only one who's into killing off old Caddies...
0:13:44 > 0:13:45..GM is, too.
0:13:47 > 0:13:51'In 1999, with the brand dying off - like most of its buyers -
0:13:51 > 0:13:54'Cadillac announced the new "art and science" philosophy.
0:13:54 > 0:13:58'A plan to get back to their roots, with cutting-edge design
0:13:58 > 0:14:01'and high-end technology.
0:14:01 > 0:14:05'Now, they didn't even have a car for it yet, just an attitude,'
0:14:05 > 0:14:07but it was a good attitude.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12'And this new approach puts Cadillac performance right up there
0:14:12 > 0:14:14'with exotics like Ferrari.
0:14:14 > 0:14:19'So, could a 60,000 Cadillac beat a 200,000 Ferrari in a drag race?
0:14:22 > 0:14:26'There's only one way to find out.
0:14:26 > 0:14:30'But, first, I would need to check out Cadillac's new beast.'
0:14:43 > 0:14:47Now, this is a Cadillac you'd want to drive.
0:14:47 > 0:14:50Old men riding around with your blinker on for miles, watch out.
0:14:50 > 0:14:52I'm coming for you, gramps.
0:14:55 > 0:14:57This is a 2011 Cadillac CTS-V.
0:14:58 > 0:15:02It's got a Corvette engine in it, but not just any Corvette,
0:15:02 > 0:15:06the daddy of them all - the ZR1.
0:15:07 > 0:15:11It's got 556 supercharged horsepower under the hood.
0:15:11 > 0:15:15It will do 0-60 in four seconds.
0:15:17 > 0:15:20It's got a top speed of 175 mph.
0:15:23 > 0:15:28How did this happen? How did Cadillac become cool again?
0:15:28 > 0:15:31Cadillac's history is a lot like John Travolta's -
0:15:31 > 0:15:35it was really cool at first, and then all of a sudden,
0:15:35 > 0:15:37it became seriously uncool.
0:15:37 > 0:15:39And then, bang, it was cool again.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42I mean, this car, this is Cadillac's Pulp Fiction.
0:15:43 > 0:15:45So, they took out a sheet of paper, and to me
0:15:45 > 0:15:49it looks like they didn't draw anything on it, they just folded it.
0:15:49 > 0:15:53There's curves, but they're all caught on the sharp edges and creases.
0:15:53 > 0:15:56This new look, this is what sets Cadillac apart, the CTS,
0:15:56 > 0:16:00the XLR, even the Escalade SUV.
0:16:00 > 0:16:03And you know what? It looks fantastic.
0:16:06 > 0:16:09'And it wasn't all design. The new Cadillacs would have
0:16:09 > 0:16:13'something else to set them apart - performance.'
0:16:18 > 0:16:21Oh, yeah.
0:16:22 > 0:16:25And it's got a manual six speed gearbox, standard.
0:16:25 > 0:16:30You don't normally associate Cadillac with manual transmission,
0:16:30 > 0:16:32but in this one, it makes perfect sense.
0:16:34 > 0:16:39You can smoke the tires at 100 mph.
0:16:40 > 0:16:44This is American bad ass, wrapped in Hugo Boss,
0:16:44 > 0:16:48it's like John Wayne in a Tommy Hilfiger sweater.
0:16:52 > 0:16:55Wow, you shouldn't be able to do this in a Cadillac!
0:16:59 > 0:17:03There are some things about this car that I really like.
0:17:03 > 0:17:07When you first get in the car, you notice the beautiful interior.
0:17:07 > 0:17:11There's suede everywhere, there's nice leather stitching,
0:17:11 > 0:17:12and then you look up -
0:17:12 > 0:17:15and see the same headliner that's in a Chevy truck.
0:17:15 > 0:17:18Why does GM do that?
0:17:18 > 0:17:21They get so close to making a perfect car,
0:17:21 > 0:17:23and then at the last minute, "Oh, just whatever.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26"I don't care, no one's going to look up."
0:17:26 > 0:17:31And one thing I don't like in here is the door handles on the CTS-V.
0:17:31 > 0:17:34To get out, it's a strange video game door popper,
0:17:34 > 0:17:38just like they have on the Corvette, and I don't like them there either!
0:17:38 > 0:17:43What's wrong, they call it a door handle? HANDLE.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46Not door button.
0:17:46 > 0:17:50'But it's remarkable that you can get this much car for just 60,000,
0:17:50 > 0:17:53'and it gets even better.
0:17:53 > 0:17:57'For 2011, the CTS-V is available in three body styles,
0:17:57 > 0:17:59'all with manual transmission,
0:17:59 > 0:18:01'and monster supercharged engine.
0:18:01 > 0:18:05'The Sudan will put you in the same league
0:18:05 > 0:18:07'as the BMW M5 or the Mercedes E63 AMG.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11'And the CTS-V wagon?
0:18:12 > 0:18:17'Well, this just might be the world's first wagon supercar.'
0:18:18 > 0:18:22The wagon? The fastest production wagon in the universe!
0:18:30 > 0:18:32Wow, this car is amazing!
0:18:35 > 0:18:39If it's not obvious by now, I am a wagon man.
0:18:39 > 0:18:42There something about a wagon, to me,
0:18:42 > 0:18:44that screams, "I'm ready for anything."
0:18:44 > 0:18:47And this is the perfect kind of wagon that I'd want.
0:18:47 > 0:18:53Can you imagine going shopping in a wagon with over 500 horsepower?
0:18:53 > 0:18:56You could do a burnout all the way home from the mall,
0:18:56 > 0:19:00while your kids are in the back screaming. That's awesome.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04'Cadillac has developed an incredible new line of high-performance vehicles.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07'I can understand why some, mainly old, people,
0:19:07 > 0:19:12'might think the CTS-Vs are too much of a departure from the old Caddies,
0:19:12 > 0:19:14'but I think they can be convinced.'
0:19:26 > 0:19:29Driving Miss Ferrara. Can I get your bags for you, sir?
0:19:29 > 0:19:33- No problem, I have people for that. - What in the world is this?
0:19:33 > 0:19:35This is a statement, my friend.
0:19:35 > 0:19:411957 Eldorado Biarritz, that's when a Cadillac was a Cadillac.
0:19:41 > 0:19:46No way. This is the new Cadillac. The 2011 CTS-V.
0:19:46 > 0:19:50- You can get a two-door, a four-door, or a wagon.- Backup, backup. Wagon.
0:19:50 > 0:19:53- Oh, yeah.- How was the soccer game? - It's amazing.- Really?
0:19:53 > 0:19:55This says, "you've arrived,"
0:19:55 > 0:19:59that says, "you've arrived from summer camp with the kids."
0:19:59 > 0:20:01- What are you doing? - They are the new Cadillac.
0:20:01 > 0:20:04OK, I'll be honest with you. I been burned by Caddies before.
0:20:04 > 0:20:07The last great Caddy for me was the '76 Coupe de Ville.
0:20:07 > 0:20:11After that, Caddies got smaller, and just went right down the toilet.
0:20:11 > 0:20:13'Adam wasn't convinced.
0:20:13 > 0:20:17'So, I needed to resort to a simple demonstration,
0:20:17 > 0:20:20'that even he might understand - a drag race.
0:20:20 > 0:20:24'The 200,000 Ferrari California against the CTS-V...
0:20:24 > 0:20:26'..Wagon.
0:20:26 > 0:20:30'An American grocery-getter versus the world's most famous
0:20:30 > 0:20:32'Italian performance brand.'
0:20:33 > 0:20:36The Ferrari California isn't the fastest Ferrari
0:20:36 > 0:20:39but it does zero to 60 in 3.8 seconds,
0:20:39 > 0:20:41top speed of 193, let's do it.
0:20:41 > 0:20:46OK, here we go. Three, two, one, go.
0:20:49 > 0:20:51Oh, here we go.
0:20:52 > 0:20:53Oh!
0:20:55 > 0:20:56Oh-oh-oh-oh, man.
0:20:56 > 0:21:00This CTS-V Wagon is smoking him.
0:21:03 > 0:21:05Oh, look at that, that got him. Woo.
0:21:05 > 0:21:07Holy crap.
0:21:08 > 0:21:13The Wagon just beat a Ferrari. Which is a stupid fast car.
0:21:13 > 0:21:17That means this is faster than stupid fast. This is F-you fast.
0:21:20 > 0:21:22Driving those Cadillacs was a blast.
0:21:22 > 0:21:24I bet, for once, you're jealous.
0:21:24 > 0:21:26I was. That looked like a lot of fun.
0:21:26 > 0:21:29But, really, Cadillac, an old-man brand
0:21:29 > 0:21:32now saying they rival the fastest cars on the planet?
0:21:32 > 0:21:33I'm not buying it.
0:21:33 > 0:21:35See, that's it exactly why we gave the Coupe
0:21:35 > 0:21:38and the Wagon to our anonymous racing driver The Stig
0:21:38 > 0:21:42to put around our test track and see how fast they really are.
0:21:42 > 0:21:45Now, The Stig drove the CTS-V Coupe earlier
0:21:45 > 0:21:47and we'll show you that time in a minute.
0:21:47 > 0:21:51But Rutledge insisted on showing The Stig driving the Wagon. Shocking.
0:21:52 > 0:21:54Let's see how The Stig does.
0:21:55 > 0:21:58Well, Rutledge may worship this as the ultimate Wagon
0:21:58 > 0:22:00but at the hands of The Stig,
0:22:00 > 0:22:03I think we'll see some chinks in the armour.
0:22:03 > 0:22:06Strangely, very quick coming round the first turn
0:22:06 > 0:22:07into the chicane.
0:22:07 > 0:22:11I was expecting to see quite a bit more body roll.
0:22:12 > 0:22:13Now, this is the true test,
0:22:13 > 0:22:15out of the teardrop,
0:22:15 > 0:22:18slowest section of the track, will it have wheels spin
0:22:18 > 0:22:21or be efficiently putting the power to the ground?
0:22:21 > 0:22:24I would say that is a no.
0:22:24 > 0:22:27Wheels are blazing on the way out of the teardrop, but building
0:22:27 > 0:22:30huge speed as it comes around the fastest, back straightaway.
0:22:34 > 0:22:38Over 120 miles an hour we see on the speedometer. Very fast by the tyres.
0:22:42 > 0:22:46Wow, amazing - beautiful little drift
0:22:46 > 0:22:50as the car just seems to absorb the bumps mid-drift.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53I'm really impressed with the way the suspension is working.
0:22:55 > 0:22:58It's just getting around the track. It may not be the most sophisticated
0:22:58 > 0:23:01but, as it comes through the last corner,
0:23:01 > 0:23:02a bit of drift and across the line.
0:23:04 > 0:23:06- Wow.- That is the fastest wagon I have ever seen.
0:23:06 > 0:23:09What do you guys think? Wagon faster than the Coupe?
0:23:09 > 0:23:13- Yes.- No!- Coupe faster?- Yeah! - Coupe's faster than the wagon?- Yeah.
0:23:13 > 0:23:16You'd think the Coupe has got to be faster than the Wagon.
0:23:16 > 0:23:21The Coupe did it in a time of 1:27.4.
0:23:21 > 0:23:25- That puts it ahead of a Mercedes SLS AMG.- Wow.
0:23:25 > 0:23:28- That's a quarter-million dollar car right there.- Wow.
0:23:28 > 0:23:31Their supercar just got beat by an American car.
0:23:31 > 0:23:34- That can't be right. - Wow.- Really?- That feels good.
0:23:34 > 0:23:36LAUGHTER
0:23:36 > 0:23:39Now, if the Wagon was just even a second or two slower,
0:23:39 > 0:23:42it still would be in respectable territory.
0:23:42 > 0:23:45You've got the Lotus Evora down here, you've got the V12 Vantage.
0:23:45 > 0:23:51The Wagon did it in a time of 1:27.2.
0:23:53 > 0:24:00- Two tenths faster - faster! Faster than the Coupe.- Unbelievable.
0:24:00 > 0:24:03That is unreal, especially for the money.
0:24:03 > 0:24:06- I mean, these are both right around 60 grand. Wow.- Incredible.
0:24:06 > 0:24:10And that's only slightly better value than our 500 cars.
0:24:16 > 0:24:21'So far, our junkie jalopies had raced hundreds of miles
0:24:21 > 0:24:23'up the California coast towards San Francisco.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28'My Festiva was doing great.
0:24:28 > 0:24:30'So, I hammered down and tried to pull ahead.'
0:24:30 > 0:24:31Gas it, gas it!
0:24:32 > 0:24:35Ooh, ooh.
0:24:37 > 0:24:40My car smells like a pack of burning matches.
0:24:41 > 0:24:44'Apparently, I didn't have the power I needed to make my move.
0:24:44 > 0:24:50- 'So, Adam was now in front.' - I'm flying along at 65 miles an hour.
0:24:50 > 0:24:53As long as I don't turn, I'm fine.
0:24:53 > 0:24:56If Adam's life insurance carrier knew he was driving a retired taxi
0:24:56 > 0:25:01with 400,000 miles on it, they would drop him like a bad habit.
0:25:01 > 0:25:04'Tanner was going to have to get used to seeing my tail-lights.
0:25:04 > 0:25:08'I was the first to arrive at our next stop in Santa Cruz...
0:25:10 > 0:25:14'..where we received some unwelcome information about our cars.'
0:25:14 > 0:25:16All right, fellas, pay attention.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18"Buying cheap cars means buying a piece of history.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21"Often one you would rather not sit in.
0:25:21 > 0:25:23"Your cars were subject to forensic analysis."
0:25:23 > 0:25:27- Really? - "Least contaminated car wins."
0:25:27 > 0:25:31- Is that what these envelopes are? - Must be.- I think so.- Oh, no.
0:25:34 > 0:25:37I'll go first. I have total confidence in the Festiva.
0:25:37 > 0:25:39Here we go.
0:25:39 > 0:25:42"Hair of non-human origin,
0:25:42 > 0:25:44"variable length and colour,
0:25:44 > 0:25:46"found in large quantities.
0:25:46 > 0:25:49"Visible under ultraviolet light,
0:25:49 > 0:25:53"overlapping stain fields of organic origin,
0:25:53 > 0:25:54"concentrations of ammonia
0:25:54 > 0:25:57"and fructose consistent with urine and seminal fluid".
0:25:57 > 0:25:59Wait, stain FIELDS?
0:25:59 > 0:26:02There is dog breeding that goes on in that Festiva!
0:26:02 > 0:26:05Fields of animal fluids in the back of that?
0:26:05 > 0:26:08"Traces of faecal matter". Oh, that's so gross!
0:26:08 > 0:26:10Well, could be worse.
0:26:10 > 0:26:14Yeah, there could be human AND dog fluids in there.
0:26:14 > 0:26:16Oh, like you should talk(!) What's yours say?
0:26:16 > 0:26:19OK. "Present in both left and right rear footwells
0:26:19 > 0:26:23"are dispersed areas of dried substance with concentrations of HCO,
0:26:23 > 0:26:25"hydrochloric acid,
0:26:25 > 0:26:27"consistent with vomitus".
0:26:27 > 0:26:30Stomach acid.
0:26:30 > 0:26:33"UV analysis of the rear bench seat reveals bloodstains
0:26:33 > 0:26:36"in the underlying foam, covering approximately
0:26:36 > 0:26:38"one third of the seating area".
0:26:38 > 0:26:41- One THIRD?! - You're bleeding to death!
0:26:41 > 0:26:42Somebody could have died.
0:26:42 > 0:26:46Someone could have had a baby in there. You don't know.
0:26:46 > 0:26:48- Oh my gosh!- If it's down in the foam, it got hosed!
0:26:48 > 0:26:53Which means it's not on the cover any more, so it's fine.
0:26:53 > 0:26:54All right, what have you got?
0:26:54 > 0:26:56Mine's going to be boring.
0:26:56 > 0:26:57This car's clean.
0:26:57 > 0:26:59Yeah, it looks so tidy(!)
0:26:59 > 0:27:03There's a few more sentences here than I would have expected, actually.
0:27:03 > 0:27:05"Moderate quantities of nasal mucosa
0:27:05 > 0:27:08"found on the steering wheel."
0:27:08 > 0:27:09Snot!
0:27:09 > 0:27:10"Protein-rich..."
0:27:10 > 0:27:13Anything that starts with "protein-rich",
0:27:13 > 0:27:14I'm telling you is bad!
0:27:14 > 0:27:17"Protein-rich substance found
0:27:17 > 0:27:19"in crevices of driver seat cushion.
0:27:19 > 0:27:21"High concentration of dead skin cells,
0:27:21 > 0:27:27- "and presence of staphylococcus bacteria."- Oh, no way!
0:27:27 > 0:27:30Rear car has a Staph infection.
0:27:30 > 0:27:31Drink orange juice, knock that out.
0:27:31 > 0:27:34A Staph infection on the steering wheel!
0:27:34 > 0:27:36I mean, I'm not like a hypochondriac...
0:27:36 > 0:27:37You actually are!
0:27:37 > 0:27:39- That is gross.- Clearly, you lose.
0:27:39 > 0:27:42- How did it get on the steering wheel?- You'll probably die!
0:27:42 > 0:27:44Look, I win.
0:27:44 > 0:27:47- You do not win!- Of course I win! - You're soaked in blood!
0:27:47 > 0:27:49Blood and puke, what do you expect?
0:27:49 > 0:27:51We've got two words,
0:27:51 > 0:27:52"boundary layer".
0:27:52 > 0:27:55- That's what's happening now.- Really?
0:27:55 > 0:27:56- Yeah.- All right.
0:27:56 > 0:27:59- 20 minutes, we meet back here... - Oh, my gosh!
0:27:59 > 0:28:01..Make whatever "boundary layers" you want,
0:28:01 > 0:28:03and then head up to San Francisco, all right?
0:28:03 > 0:28:06All right, I'm starting to feel a little better.
0:28:06 > 0:28:08Rut, you might want to get a flea collar!
0:28:08 > 0:28:11- It's just TRACES of faecal matter. - Oh, that's much better(!)
0:28:11 > 0:28:14I thought there was a problem(!)
0:28:14 > 0:28:16Now it's time for Big Star, Small Car,
0:28:16 > 0:28:18where we put celebrities in our Suzuki SX4,
0:28:18 > 0:28:21and send them round the test track to see who's got the fastest time.
0:28:21 > 0:28:25Our celebrity today is Maroon 5's Adam Levine.
0:28:25 > 0:28:26APPLAUSE
0:28:26 > 0:28:28HE HOWLS
0:28:28 > 0:28:31- Welcome, man!- How's it going, man? - We're so excited you could be here!
0:28:31 > 0:28:33I am very excited to be here.
0:28:33 > 0:28:35We've had musicians do well here before.
0:28:35 > 0:28:38Do you feel like you're going to the top of the board?
0:28:38 > 0:28:40Do you think first or last?
0:28:40 > 0:28:42LAUGHTER
0:28:42 > 0:28:43Let's get you out there, man.
0:28:43 > 0:28:46- Let's go for it. Hop on in. - Let's do it.- Good luck.
0:28:46 > 0:28:49We're going to clear the track. We'll meet you back at the hangar.
0:28:49 > 0:28:51Go get them!
0:28:51 > 0:28:53- Let's go, you guys! - CHEERING
0:28:54 > 0:28:57look at that determination! Adam's off to a good start.
0:28:59 > 0:29:00Catch in second.
0:29:00 > 0:29:02Come on!
0:29:02 > 0:29:04What is up with this ..., man?
0:29:04 > 0:29:07Coming up to turn one. Getting a little intense.
0:29:07 > 0:29:10This is going to be all sound bites of me just cursing
0:29:10 > 0:29:12cos I'm so pissed off! Damn it, dude!
0:29:14 > 0:29:16So annoying!
0:29:16 > 0:29:19It's easy to get flustered out there.
0:29:21 > 0:29:22Dude, dude!
0:29:24 > 0:29:25- BLEEP- dude!
0:29:25 > 0:29:27Suzuki does that to a lot of people.
0:29:28 > 0:29:31All right, he's got some good speed out on the back stretch.
0:29:33 > 0:29:35Looks good right there, nice and smooth.
0:29:36 > 0:29:38A good speed, little understeer.
0:29:38 > 0:29:40Does third gear exist?
0:29:40 > 0:29:43I think it does. It's in between second and fourth.
0:29:43 > 0:29:45Here it is, last turn...
0:29:45 > 0:29:46and Adam is across the line.
0:29:46 > 0:29:47BLEEP!
0:29:47 > 0:29:50- And he's still smiling. - APPLAUSE
0:29:52 > 0:29:54Come on up!
0:29:54 > 0:29:55Come on up!
0:29:57 > 0:29:59Adam Levine, everybody!
0:29:59 > 0:30:01CHEERING
0:30:01 > 0:30:03How you doing, man? Nice work out there!
0:30:06 > 0:30:08- You have a good time? - I had a lot of fun.
0:30:08 > 0:30:11Just hope that I'm not last!
0:30:11 > 0:30:12Let's talk.
0:30:12 > 0:30:15You're a busy man, one of the judges on The Voice, great show.
0:30:15 > 0:30:18APPLAUSE
0:30:18 > 0:30:20You're in a HUGELY popular band, Maroon 5.
0:30:20 > 0:30:22I want to know, how did you get into cars?
0:30:22 > 0:30:25I've always enjoyed driving, you know.
0:30:25 > 0:30:27I was born and raised in Los Angeles.
0:30:27 > 0:30:30It's always a huge part of California culture, I think,
0:30:30 > 0:30:32driving and enjoying your car.
0:30:32 > 0:30:35It's kind of your sanctuary, it's your space, and I just love it.
0:30:35 > 0:30:39- East Coast people don't understand... - LAUGHTER
0:30:39 > 0:30:42They don't! They're like, "oh, subway, taxi..."
0:30:43 > 0:30:45Your first car was what?
0:30:45 > 0:30:48My first car was a 1971 Mach 1, Mustang Mach 1.
0:30:48 > 0:30:49A Mach 1!
0:30:49 > 0:30:51APPLAUSE
0:30:55 > 0:30:57I didn't know anything - and still don't - about cars.
0:30:57 > 0:31:02I thought it was a beautiful thing and loved it. I started getting into it. It snowballed out of control.
0:31:02 > 0:31:05And now, here I am, racing Suzukis.
0:31:05 > 0:31:08It's a natural progression, Mach 1 to Suzuki.
0:31:08 > 0:31:10Did your car path help you with the ladies?
0:31:10 > 0:31:12Not originally.
0:31:12 > 0:31:15Not when I was driving my mum's...
0:31:15 > 0:31:17awesome, bright red Jeep Cherokee to school.
0:31:17 > 0:31:21- That didn't get me any dates with the ladies.- Did not!
0:31:21 > 0:31:23But I loved that car. That car's bad ass!
0:31:23 > 0:31:25The coolest car I've owned, my dad gave me his.
0:31:25 > 0:31:28- He had like an 86 Jimmy, JMC Jimmy. - Yeah.
0:31:28 > 0:31:31It was black, and it had a red stripe on it.
0:31:31 > 0:31:33Still the coolest car to this day.
0:31:33 > 0:31:35- It just had a history to it.- Sure.
0:31:35 > 0:31:38And what was that beautiful car you drove in this morning?
0:31:38 > 0:31:41- That was an Aston Martin, that was a DB9.- A DB9!
0:31:41 > 0:31:42APPLAUSE
0:31:42 > 0:31:43Yeah!
0:31:43 > 0:31:45That's advanced!
0:31:45 > 0:31:47I love that car, man.
0:31:47 > 0:31:52My buddies and I always take that car out to Vegas so we can drive quickly,
0:31:52 > 0:31:55and I've been pulled over many, many times in that car!
0:31:55 > 0:31:58I've been pulled over, actually, about six times in that car.
0:32:00 > 0:32:02I've never gotten a ticket cos...
0:32:02 > 0:32:06- How'd you do that? - This is so stupid to do it on television. Uh...
0:32:06 > 0:32:09Cos I got pulled over once on the way to Vegas.
0:32:09 > 0:32:11I was probably going 95 miles an hour and in that car,
0:32:11 > 0:32:14it just feels you're getting started, but clearly to...
0:32:14 > 0:32:16There are laws against speeding.
0:32:16 > 0:32:19So this cop pulled me over and he looked at me for a minute -
0:32:19 > 0:32:21this is on the way to Vegas - he looked at me for a bit,
0:32:21 > 0:32:24he goes, "Be right back." He goes to his car, comes back.
0:32:24 > 0:32:26I'm thinking, "Great, I'm going to jail.
0:32:26 > 0:32:29"Reckless driving, I'm dead. He's taking my car." I'm freaking out.
0:32:29 > 0:32:32He just looked at me and goes, "I should arrest you,
0:32:32 > 0:32:34"but my wife's a big fan, so..."
0:32:34 > 0:32:35LAUGHTER
0:32:35 > 0:32:37She'll kill me if I arrest you.
0:32:37 > 0:32:40I was like, "Thank God for your wife, sir."
0:32:40 > 0:32:42- LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE - That is awesome!
0:32:43 > 0:32:45So, Adam, how d'you think you did?
0:32:45 > 0:32:49All right. Here's where I make excuses and bitch and moan about it
0:32:49 > 0:32:51- but I'm going to do it, cos I think I should.- Sure.
0:32:51 > 0:32:53I didn't have the full amount of time.
0:32:53 > 0:32:56- "I didn't have the total amount of time!"- I didn't!
0:32:56 > 0:32:58- "I'm just... I'm very busy." - I will stab you!
0:32:58 > 0:33:01Bring it! Bring it! You went out there in the Suzuki.
0:33:01 > 0:33:05- You felt good, though, right? - I started feeling good.
0:33:05 > 0:33:07I got some lessons and started learning
0:33:07 > 0:33:11and just when I started getting comfortable, I have to leave.
0:33:11 > 0:33:14You give me 30 minutes, I'll give you number one.
0:33:14 > 0:33:16- AUDIENCE:- Oooh!
0:33:16 > 0:33:18Wow! You guys want to see his time?
0:33:18 > 0:33:20- AUDIENCE:- Yeah!- All right.
0:33:20 > 0:33:21APPLAUSE
0:33:21 > 0:33:23Here we go.
0:33:23 > 0:33:25Adam Levine, you did it...
0:33:25 > 0:33:27..in 1...
0:33:27 > 0:33:29.49.2.
0:33:29 > 0:33:31- AUDIENCE:- Oh!
0:33:31 > 0:33:32Boo!
0:33:32 > 0:33:36Right there. You're between two Pawn Stars.
0:33:37 > 0:33:40- Oh, look at... Disappointment!- Well, I mean...
0:33:40 > 0:33:43I'm very proud of my very quick progress,
0:33:43 > 0:33:47however, I am disappointed, cos I swear to you,
0:33:47 > 0:33:49every one I've shaven whole seconds off,
0:33:49 > 0:33:51so I could have gotten down there, man.
0:33:51 > 0:33:53- There's no doubt in my mind. - I agree.
0:33:53 > 0:33:56- Right here, man!- I agree. - Right here!- It's all there!
0:33:56 > 0:33:58That's all you needed, right?
0:33:58 > 0:34:00- Don't you play that- BLEEP- violin for me!
0:34:00 > 0:34:05- RUTLEDGE LAUGHS - You guys, let's give Adam a hand. Come on!
0:34:05 > 0:34:07CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:34:07 > 0:34:12- Last question for you.- Yeah?- Have you ever bought a car for 500 bucks?
0:34:12 > 0:34:16- I've never paid 500 for a car. - Yeah. And we're about to see why that's a good thing.
0:34:16 > 0:34:18We're getting back to our 500 challenge.
0:34:22 > 0:34:26'We'd just received the disgusting results of a forensic test
0:34:26 > 0:34:27'on our cars.'
0:34:27 > 0:34:31- Overlapping stain fields... - Vomitus...- Nasal mucosa...
0:34:31 > 0:34:34- Bloodstains... - Staphylococcus bacteria...
0:34:34 > 0:34:36Urine and seminal fluid.
0:34:36 > 0:34:40'So we decided to protect ourselves with whatever we could find.'
0:34:42 > 0:34:44Oh! Hey!
0:34:44 > 0:34:47Hey?! You look ridiculous! What is that?
0:34:47 > 0:34:51It's a protective suit. We're at the beach. It's the best I could find, man.
0:34:51 > 0:34:53That's the dumbest thing I've ever seen.
0:34:53 > 0:34:55I was wrong.
0:34:56 > 0:34:59Morons.
0:35:00 > 0:35:02- Let's do this.- All right!
0:35:02 > 0:35:04Let's go.
0:35:04 > 0:35:08May not have thought this all the way through.
0:35:09 > 0:35:14'We only had 73 miles to go to complete our 500-mile journey
0:35:14 > 0:35:17'in our 500 cars, which had just been proven to be
0:35:17 > 0:35:20'rolling bio-hazards.'
0:35:20 > 0:35:24To be honest, the forensic report didn't tell me anything I didn't already know.
0:35:24 > 0:35:27There's blood and puke in a cab. You come to expect that.
0:35:27 > 0:35:30So I bought the gloves so I don't have to touch anything.
0:35:30 > 0:35:33I have the traditional beaded cabbie seat,
0:35:33 > 0:35:38so I don't have to sit actually on the germ-infected...velour.
0:35:38 > 0:35:40And, er... Ah!
0:35:40 > 0:35:43Incense. To get rid of that kind of smell.
0:35:45 > 0:35:47There we go.
0:35:47 > 0:35:50After getting that report,
0:35:50 > 0:35:53I really feel like I came up with a great solution.
0:35:53 > 0:35:57I mean, I needed a barrier between me and all the nastiness and...
0:35:57 > 0:35:59this vinyl seems to be doing the trick.
0:35:59 > 0:36:03I'm noticing my peripheral is slightly distorted
0:36:03 > 0:36:05with this costume.
0:36:06 > 0:36:09As if you ever had peripheral vision!
0:36:09 > 0:36:11Ha!
0:36:11 > 0:36:12You sound awesome!
0:36:13 > 0:36:17I can't help but feel incredibly drowsy in this mask.
0:36:17 > 0:36:19I'm just going to say that.
0:36:19 > 0:36:20Ha-ha-ha!
0:36:20 > 0:36:22I'm totally falling asleep.
0:36:26 > 0:36:28But I did feel quite a bit better, with the boundary layer.
0:36:28 > 0:36:31The rubber gloves are probably the key,
0:36:31 > 0:36:34because the hands are going to be...
0:36:34 > 0:36:38scratching itches on the nose, rubbing the eyes, things like that.
0:36:38 > 0:36:40As long as you get that boundary layer.
0:36:40 > 0:36:43In fact, everybody should carry a boundary layer in their car.
0:36:45 > 0:36:47Adam, which would you take?
0:36:47 > 0:36:50A bath of pus and snot, or of blood and vomit?
0:36:50 > 0:36:53Is it my pus and snot and my blood and vomit?
0:36:53 > 0:36:55'Random people.'
0:36:55 > 0:36:58Sick people or healthy people?
0:36:58 > 0:37:00'Taxicab drivers'
0:37:00 > 0:37:03and patrons of said taxi.
0:37:03 > 0:37:06I'll take drunk vomit.
0:37:06 > 0:37:10Do you guys ever listen to what you're saying?
0:37:17 > 0:37:21Go on, baby, third gear! There it is!
0:37:21 > 0:37:23How are you doing on power there, Rut?
0:37:23 > 0:37:28Are you floored right now, going downhill 68 miles-an-hour?
0:37:28 > 0:37:30Come on, Rut! Pick it up!
0:37:33 > 0:37:35Power!
0:37:36 > 0:37:38Go!
0:37:38 > 0:37:40'Hey, Rut, your car is shedding!'
0:37:43 > 0:37:45Sure, you might be disgusting to ride in,
0:37:45 > 0:37:48and you're not much to look at, Festiva, but, damn it,
0:37:48 > 0:37:51you're going to make it 500 miles!
0:37:51 > 0:37:54'That is, as long as I didn't hit traffic.'
0:37:57 > 0:37:58Oh, boy.
0:38:00 > 0:38:02- This is going to get hairy as- BLEEP.
0:38:04 > 0:38:07Aw, something's burning on this thing.
0:38:14 > 0:38:17It's starting to stall every time I stop.
0:38:17 > 0:38:20I don't know if it's because it's gotten so warm?
0:38:20 > 0:38:25The gauge doesn't say that it's warm but I can smell that it's warm.
0:38:25 > 0:38:26Uh, airport, please.
0:38:26 > 0:38:30Oh, oh. No way. Somebody just climbed in Adam's!
0:38:30 > 0:38:32Uh, I'm not working.
0:38:35 > 0:38:38Did that guy just try and get in your car as a taxi?
0:38:38 > 0:38:39Yeah.
0:38:39 > 0:38:42Does he know what he just sat in?
0:38:42 > 0:38:45I don't think so, although he does appear to be scratching.
0:38:45 > 0:38:46Ah, ha-ha.
0:38:46 > 0:38:50I could've made 45 bucks taking him to the airport.
0:38:50 > 0:38:52I should have taken him.
0:38:52 > 0:38:55'The deeper we got into the city,
0:38:55 > 0:38:57'the more my Festiva began to struggle.'
0:38:57 > 0:39:01So, my clutch is going, I've got valves tapping
0:39:01 > 0:39:04and now my blinkers don't work.
0:39:04 > 0:39:05HORN BEEPS REPEATEDLY
0:39:05 > 0:39:08As you can probably tell, my horn won't stop honking.
0:39:08 > 0:39:12Seriously, Rut, come on, enough with the horn.
0:39:12 > 0:39:14It's not me, it's stuck!
0:39:14 > 0:39:18'Rut's horn was broken, so we decided to help him fix it.'
0:39:18 > 0:39:20Adam, you want to play Festiva tennis?
0:39:20 > 0:39:22Please, no.
0:39:22 > 0:39:24- Yeah, OK.- Oh,- BLEEP.
0:39:24 > 0:39:26Come on!
0:39:26 > 0:39:27Your shot.
0:39:27 > 0:39:29Service!
0:39:29 > 0:39:30Oh, ow!
0:39:33 > 0:39:35- BLEEP,- I hate you guys.
0:39:35 > 0:39:38Going for the volley.
0:39:38 > 0:39:39HE LAUGHS
0:39:39 > 0:39:41Come on!
0:39:41 > 0:39:45Oh, green light, green light.
0:39:45 > 0:39:46I hate you both...
0:39:46 > 0:39:48so much right now.
0:39:48 > 0:39:50Hey.
0:39:50 > 0:39:52I love your town.
0:39:52 > 0:39:54HORN CONTINUES BEEPING
0:39:56 > 0:40:00Yeah, I think my clutch just went.
0:40:00 > 0:40:02You guys?
0:40:05 > 0:40:07You're kidding?
0:40:09 > 0:40:12See you later, alligator!
0:40:12 > 0:40:13Son of a bitch!
0:40:15 > 0:40:18Really? Come on!
0:40:18 > 0:40:20TRAM HORN TOOTS
0:40:21 > 0:40:23It's only 1,600 lb!
0:40:24 > 0:40:28Remember the big victory dance when he won the push race?
0:40:28 > 0:40:30Now he can do it uphill in an alligator suit.
0:40:30 > 0:40:32HE LAUGHS
0:40:32 > 0:40:34I lost my tail, let me just get that.
0:40:36 > 0:40:39OK. OK.
0:40:39 > 0:40:42All right, we've got some steep hills here.
0:40:42 > 0:40:45- We better be getting to Twin Peaks soon.- Hold on, baby.
0:40:45 > 0:40:46Come on. We're almost there.
0:40:46 > 0:40:49'The race was down to me and Tanner.
0:40:49 > 0:40:53'He may be a professional driver, but my car had more power,
0:40:53 > 0:40:55'and I was riding his tail like a real taxi driver.'
0:40:57 > 0:40:59Downshift, baby, come on.
0:40:59 > 0:41:01Oh, yeah, feel the power, feel the power.
0:41:03 > 0:41:05Come on, come on.
0:41:05 > 0:41:07Come on, come on, come on.
0:41:08 > 0:41:11Almost there. Done, done, done!
0:41:13 > 0:41:16No, no, no, no, keep going.
0:41:16 > 0:41:19Help! No! Come on! Go, go, go, go, go.
0:41:22 > 0:41:23Hold on.
0:41:25 > 0:41:30Oh, "My Mercedes is the taxi of the world. This is German engineering."
0:41:30 > 0:41:36And that Festiva, a rolling pet shop, burns out its clutch.
0:41:36 > 0:41:42But the Crown Victoria with 426,000 miles
0:41:42 > 0:41:45has gone another 500 miles.
0:41:45 > 0:41:47At 35 cents a mile!
0:41:52 > 0:41:56Yes! Yes! We did it! Tanner!
0:41:56 > 0:41:59Tanner! I guess you know, I won!
0:42:01 > 0:42:05For 45 bucks, I could take you to the airport!
0:42:05 > 0:42:0845 bucks seems a little bit steep.
0:42:08 > 0:42:10In a Crown Vic!
0:42:10 > 0:42:12HE CACKLES
0:42:12 > 0:42:13CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:42:13 > 0:42:16Ladies and gentlemen, the Crown Victoria.
0:42:16 > 0:42:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:42:20 > 0:42:23I've got to give it up, that car is really something.
0:42:23 > 0:42:26Especially when you consider all the extras that came for free.
0:42:26 > 0:42:30- The vomit.- The blood and the urine.
0:42:30 > 0:42:31Oh, and the victory.
0:42:33 > 0:42:35You know, the real victory here is that for once
0:42:35 > 0:42:38we found a car that you can't kill in a show.
0:42:38 > 0:42:41Let's hear it for Adam, he had a car last a whole show!
0:42:41 > 0:42:43Finally. Finally.
0:42:43 > 0:42:44Unbelievable.
0:42:44 > 0:42:48I think the real lesson here is that you should drive
0:42:48 > 0:42:49a Crown Victoria every day.
0:42:49 > 0:42:52OK, and then you drive this pet wagon every day.
0:42:52 > 0:42:55I think just standing next to this car is taking years off our life.
0:42:55 > 0:42:57We have got to get out of here.
0:42:57 > 0:43:00That's our show, thanks for watching, everybody.
0:43:07 > 0:43:11Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd