Bolivia Special

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0:00:17 > 0:00:20Hello, everybody. Hello. Thank you.

0:00:20 > 0:00:22Hello!

0:00:22 > 0:00:25Hello and welcome to a Top Gear special,

0:00:25 > 0:00:28which tonight comes to you from South America.

0:00:28 > 0:00:32Yeah. The brief was simple. Each of us would be given a pittance.

0:00:32 > 0:00:35And we were told we could buy any car we liked

0:00:35 > 0:00:38from a second-hand car website in Bolivia.

0:00:38 > 0:00:42Yeah. And the only bit of advice we got, rather worryingly,

0:00:42 > 0:00:45was that it would be best if we chose a car with four-wheel drive.

0:00:45 > 0:00:48We were then told we would be united with our cars

0:00:48 > 0:00:51somewhere around here in a place called Spidertown,

0:00:51 > 0:00:55right in the middle of the Amazon Rainforest.

0:00:58 > 0:01:01These are the views that greeted us from our helicopter.

0:01:02 > 0:01:04Except they're not,

0:01:04 > 0:01:07because the helicopter booked for us had crashed.

0:01:09 > 0:01:11That meant we had to borrow these pictures

0:01:11 > 0:01:13from Bruce Parry's programme...

0:01:16 > 0:01:18..and go to the start point in a boat...

0:01:18 > 0:01:21utterly bewildered by everything.

0:01:21 > 0:01:24- Look at that purple tree! - The butterfly's more amazing.

0:01:24 > 0:01:29- No, the purple tree's the best.- No! The butterfly was the size of a bat.

0:01:29 > 0:01:30Another crocodile over there.

0:01:30 > 0:01:33It's not a crocodile, it's a lump of wood.

0:01:33 > 0:01:35Bird! Bird!

0:01:35 > 0:01:39- We're close to the Equator.- We're very close. Perhaps we're on it!

0:01:39 > 0:01:41No, we'd see a big dotted line.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44'And we weren't the only fish out of water.'

0:01:45 > 0:01:48It jumped in the boat! It jumped in the boat!

0:01:48 > 0:01:51- In the boat! - I've got it with my knife!

0:01:51 > 0:01:54Ha-ha! Is that a piranha?

0:01:54 > 0:01:56It's not a piranha, they're long and thin.

0:01:56 > 0:02:00- They're not!- No, they're not! - They are!- They're short and fat!

0:02:00 > 0:02:01Oh, that's sharks.

0:02:04 > 0:02:08'Eventually, the boat dumped the three worst explorers in history

0:02:08 > 0:02:10'on a bank, in the middle of nowhere...

0:02:10 > 0:02:11'and left.'

0:02:11 > 0:02:15Have we just been abandoned here to die? Whoa-whoa! What is it, what?

0:02:15 > 0:02:18- Are those zips?!- Well, they're outdoor trousers.

0:02:18 > 0:02:21- You can unzip the bottoms?!- Yes!

0:02:21 > 0:02:24I'm sorry, on the kit front, chaps... James, what's all this?

0:02:24 > 0:02:29- This is my belt of many things. - What is that?- Don't touch it.

0:02:29 > 0:02:32- That's a dental healthcare kit. - What's this?- Don't touch it!

0:02:32 > 0:02:34That is a shoe-polishing kit.

0:02:34 > 0:02:35BOTH: What?!

0:02:35 > 0:02:39- A shoe-polishing kit!- Thank God for that(!) If we get hungry, we can eat his Kiwi boot polish!

0:02:39 > 0:02:44- Basically, what you've done is buy a "My First Explorer" kit, put it on your belt...- Don't touch it.

0:02:44 > 0:02:47'Hammond then revealed a little secret.'

0:02:47 > 0:02:49So all these insects, where are they?

0:02:49 > 0:02:51Why, are you frightened of insects?

0:02:51 > 0:02:53- Yeah.- Are you?- Yeah.- Really?

0:02:53 > 0:02:55Don't mess about. Seriously, I am. It's a phobia.

0:02:55 > 0:02:56It's like you and heights.

0:02:56 > 0:02:59It's not you're scared of falling off, it's a phobia.

0:02:59 > 0:03:02- You are scared of heights. - This is the same, it's a phobia.

0:03:02 > 0:03:06- I just don't...- What's yours?- Phobia? Manual labour, you know that.

0:03:06 > 0:03:08That's not a phobia, that's bone idleness.

0:03:08 > 0:03:12- Rubbish!- That's not a clinical thing, that's just cos you're lazy.

0:03:13 > 0:03:18'Since we didn't know what to do, we just sat down and did nothing.'

0:03:18 > 0:03:22- I'm sure there's spiders in here, there will be.- Shh.

0:03:22 > 0:03:24What?

0:03:25 > 0:03:27- Is that...- Uh-oh. - ..in harmony with nature?

0:03:27 > 0:03:30Stop playing ethnic tunes. Boys...

0:03:30 > 0:03:31Cars.

0:03:41 > 0:03:44'Plainly, there had been a terrible mix-up

0:03:44 > 0:03:47'because one of the cars on the raft was a little Suzuki.

0:03:47 > 0:03:50'None of us would have been that daft.

0:03:50 > 0:03:53'But then we remembered... James was with us.'

0:03:54 > 0:03:58- 1.3 litre...- 1.3 litre! - ..Wine bar specials.

0:03:58 > 0:04:01Famous for being able to stay on their own four wheels...

0:04:01 > 0:04:02No, no, no. Falling over.

0:04:02 > 0:04:06I presume then the Land Cruiser, by power of deduction, is yours.

0:04:06 > 0:04:09Yes, it is. Correct choice, everyone will agree.

0:04:09 > 0:04:13And you have, if my eyes are not deceiving me, a Range Rover.

0:04:13 > 0:04:17The best 4x4, by far, as we know.

0:04:17 > 0:04:21- I had one of those.- Yeah, classic. I had one as well.- Yeah.

0:04:21 > 0:04:24- Did yours ever...work?- No.

0:04:26 > 0:04:27How is that raft steering itself?

0:04:27 > 0:04:30There's a little boat behind it, look.

0:04:30 > 0:04:34'The driver of the little boat pushed the raft vaguely near the bank...'

0:04:34 > 0:04:38Right. Well, we can get... No, don't do that, we need to get it...

0:04:38 > 0:04:40'..and then went home.'

0:04:40 > 0:04:42- Is that him just gone?- Yep.

0:04:42 > 0:04:46Oi! You haven't parked it!

0:04:49 > 0:04:54'We tried to pull the raft nearer to the bank but it was very difficult.'

0:04:54 > 0:04:57- Heave!- It's not moving!

0:04:57 > 0:04:58'So we gave up.'

0:04:58 > 0:05:00That's it, lads. Up the gang plank.

0:05:02 > 0:05:03Ow! There's a thing there.

0:05:03 > 0:05:07- We are good. It's like literally being with Livingstone...- Yeah.

0:05:07 > 0:05:09..and...

0:05:09 > 0:05:10THEY LAUGH

0:05:10 > 0:05:14- Do you want a hand up?- Help! - Probably quite painful!

0:05:14 > 0:05:16It was. Don't worry, I'm all right.

0:05:16 > 0:05:20'Eventually, even Indiana Clarkson was onboard

0:05:20 > 0:05:23'so we could get our first look at what we'd bought

0:05:23 > 0:05:25'from the Bolivian classifieds.'

0:05:25 > 0:05:30Notoriously long-lived, sturdy, reliable, small, agile.

0:05:30 > 0:05:34What does it say in the advert in the Bolivian Auto Trader?

0:05:34 > 0:05:36I'll tell you what it did show in the picture. That it was blue.

0:05:36 > 0:05:37THEY LAUGH

0:05:37 > 0:05:42Did it say, in the advert, that all four tyres would be pumped up?

0:05:42 > 0:05:45- No. - HE LAUGHS

0:05:45 > 0:05:47- Oh, bloody hell. - We did buy these long distance.

0:05:47 > 0:05:51'The only thing saggier than my tyre was Hammond's roof.

0:05:51 > 0:05:54It wasn't always a convertible, was it?

0:05:54 > 0:05:56No, it's been converted to a convertible.

0:05:56 > 0:06:00It's been converted by someone who is A, of Spanish descent

0:06:00 > 0:06:01and B, a communist.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03It's a tasty car all round. I'm very pleased.

0:06:03 > 0:06:05I like the see-through...

0:06:05 > 0:06:08I like this. The window's not here, it's here and there's no winder.

0:06:08 > 0:06:10I don't need one, it's hot.

0:06:10 > 0:06:14'To demonstrate what fools the others had been,

0:06:14 > 0:06:18'I showed them the beating heart of my mighty Ranger Rover.'

0:06:18 > 0:06:24- Behold, gentlemen, the 3.9 litre V8 engine.- Ahem.

0:06:24 > 0:06:28- 3.9, yeah?- 3.9.- They had injection, didn't they, Hammond, the 3.9?

0:06:28 > 0:06:30- Yes.- All of them were fuel-injected.

0:06:30 > 0:06:31What are those on top?

0:06:31 > 0:06:36- I believe they're carburettors. - They look like carburettors.

0:06:36 > 0:06:39- BLEEP.- They ARE carburettors. - They are carburettors, yeah.

0:06:39 > 0:06:41That can't be a 3.9, mate, that's a 3.5!

0:06:41 > 0:06:44- It said in the advert is was a 3.9! - It said mine was blue.

0:06:44 > 0:06:46OK, so there's some issues.

0:06:46 > 0:06:48- You'll be opening the bonnet a lot.- I won't.

0:06:48 > 0:06:52You will! That's what killed these off, globally. Why does everywhere,

0:06:52 > 0:06:56all over the world, anywhere difficult and inhospitable use a Toyota Land Cruiser?

0:06:56 > 0:06:58First Aztec bird we come across,

0:06:58 > 0:07:00she'll make a bee-line for me in this.

0:07:00 > 0:07:02Yeah, OK.

0:07:02 > 0:07:07'We could've continued arguing, but we had to leap ashore...'

0:07:07 > 0:07:09'Well, come on, then.'

0:07:09 > 0:07:12'..Because our challenge had arrived.'

0:07:12 > 0:07:13Thank you very much.

0:07:13 > 0:07:18OK. It says, "You are in Bolivia.

0:07:18 > 0:07:23"And you will drive to the Pacific Ocean, which is 1,000 miles away."

0:07:23 > 0:07:27- So we have to go 1,000 miles. - There's a jungle in the way.

0:07:29 > 0:07:31And the jungle would just be the start of it,

0:07:31 > 0:07:35because on our journey we'd have to negotiate active volcanoes,

0:07:35 > 0:07:40utterly lifeless deserts and perilous mountain passes.

0:07:43 > 0:07:47But before all that, we had to get our cars off the raft.

0:07:47 > 0:07:51Which, as you can plainly see, would not be easy.

0:07:51 > 0:07:53Clearly!

0:07:53 > 0:07:55Oh, come on!

0:07:57 > 0:07:59'Trying to move the raft soon led to a problem.'

0:07:59 > 0:08:01Holy moly!

0:08:01 > 0:08:03I am sinking.

0:08:03 > 0:08:06- Yeah.- It's getting deeper! Pull yourself out.

0:08:06 > 0:08:09- I cannot pull myself out. - Every time the bubbles come out,

0:08:09 > 0:08:11- you go in deeper.- I know!

0:08:11 > 0:08:15- That's brilliant!- Oh, God, no.

0:08:15 > 0:08:17THEY LAUGH

0:08:17 > 0:08:18As I sank into the ooze,

0:08:18 > 0:08:21my colleagues became increasingly concerned.

0:08:21 > 0:08:25His plums are in the Amazon, look! THEY LAUGH

0:08:25 > 0:08:28Go and get a rope or something, just to tie around my waist.

0:08:28 > 0:08:30All right, we'll get something.

0:08:30 > 0:08:33'Eventually, and rather reluctantly,

0:08:33 > 0:08:36'they decided to pull me out with my Range Rover.'

0:08:36 > 0:08:39- Hammond!- Yes! - What are you bloody doing?

0:08:39 > 0:08:41- You want a proper knot, don't you?- No!

0:08:41 > 0:08:43Just any old knot.

0:08:43 > 0:08:44Will it start?

0:08:44 > 0:08:46ENGINE STALLS

0:08:46 > 0:08:47Oh.

0:08:47 > 0:08:49- ENGINE STALLS - Start!

0:08:49 > 0:08:51You brought the wrong car.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53- ENGINE STARTS - Ah-ha-ha-ha!

0:08:53 > 0:08:55Backwards!

0:08:55 > 0:08:57Pull. Pull.

0:08:57 > 0:09:00- You coming up?- Yes! Oh, yes!

0:09:00 > 0:09:02- Ow!- Say when.

0:09:02 > 0:09:03- All right.- Here we go.- Yes.

0:09:03 > 0:09:06- Ow, my arm parts. - Is it loose enough?

0:09:06 > 0:09:07- Yes.- Stop, stop, stop.

0:09:07 > 0:09:10- Stop.- So, as we can see, my car's best.

0:09:10 > 0:09:13Well, it didn't let you down there, when it really mattered.

0:09:13 > 0:09:16'Trying to move the raft had resulted in nothing more

0:09:16 > 0:09:19'than some muddy tide-marks on my trousers.'

0:09:19 > 0:09:21My jeans are ruined!

0:09:22 > 0:09:26And so, with half the day gone, we had to come up with a new plan.

0:09:26 > 0:09:30You know, in the Second World War, when a submarine was grounded?

0:09:30 > 0:09:31When it had hit the bottom?

0:09:31 > 0:09:36They used to get the crew to run backwards and forwards and it would sort of shuffle it along.

0:09:36 > 0:09:39Are you suggesting we run backwards and forwards?

0:09:39 > 0:09:41No, no, no! Use the cars.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43If we go right to the back of the boat,

0:09:43 > 0:09:46that weighs the back down and lifts the front up.

0:09:46 > 0:09:50We then charge forward. The act of doing that will shuffle the boat

0:09:50 > 0:09:52- nearer to that bank. - That's a good idea!

0:09:53 > 0:09:57'All we needed to do, then, was back our cars up a bit.'

0:09:59 > 0:10:02- Oh, no.- Hammond! - Has anybody got any jump leads?

0:10:02 > 0:10:04- Seriously?- You're joking. - It won't start.

0:10:04 > 0:10:08Just want to get this completely clear again.

0:10:08 > 0:10:12Range Rover - starting, working well. Already saved a man's life.

0:10:12 > 0:10:14Land Cruiser - broken down.

0:10:16 > 0:10:20- Oh, smoke! Smoke, smoke, quite a lot of smoke.- Something's on fire!

0:10:20 > 0:10:21The starter motor's burn out.

0:10:21 > 0:10:24'Despite using the correct technique,

0:10:24 > 0:10:27'Hammond couldn't get his car going.'

0:10:27 > 0:10:28It's on fire again!

0:10:28 > 0:10:33And so, with the sun sinking, I offered to help.

0:10:33 > 0:10:36Why don't we simply attach it to the back of the Range Rover

0:10:36 > 0:10:37and I'll you a pull from here?

0:10:37 > 0:10:41Because I'd rather drown myself, but, yeah, it's... All right!

0:10:44 > 0:10:46What's that noise?

0:10:46 > 0:10:50- Insects!- Massive insects. - Millions of them.

0:10:50 > 0:10:53- Just hurry up, quickly! - All right, move forwards.

0:10:53 > 0:10:54Mind your head!

0:10:54 > 0:10:56'As the light faded, we lined up

0:10:56 > 0:11:00'for the most ambitious jump-start in history.'

0:11:00 > 0:11:03And...stop.

0:11:03 > 0:11:07Three, two, one, go!

0:11:12 > 0:11:13- Sorry!- What did you do that for?!

0:11:13 > 0:11:17- My breaks aren't very good! - Did it work?- No.

0:11:17 > 0:11:18Try again!

0:11:24 > 0:11:26- What happened?- Nothing.

0:11:26 > 0:11:29And...stop.

0:11:30 > 0:11:34Three, two, one, go.

0:11:38 > 0:11:41Try again! That's the good thing about Range Rovers,

0:11:41 > 0:11:42they can do this all night.

0:11:42 > 0:11:46Yes, yes. When this thing starts, it'll brilliant.

0:11:48 > 0:11:51'The morning light revealed our progress.'

0:11:53 > 0:11:58Sitrep... Everything we tried in the night didn't work.

0:11:58 > 0:12:00But we have found peanuts.

0:12:00 > 0:12:04'Rather embarrassingly, James then discovered something.'

0:12:04 > 0:12:08These planks are longer than that one you've been falling down constantly.

0:12:08 > 0:12:10If you get in here and grab the other end...

0:12:10 > 0:12:13- Are they long enough to...? - Two together will.

0:12:13 > 0:12:19'Soon, we had a ramp and our first car was ready to disembark.'

0:12:19 > 0:12:21Watch the long-haired man.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27- Let's see his back wheels on. - Don't stand there.

0:12:27 > 0:12:30Do you want us to help you? You're all right.

0:12:30 > 0:12:31You're all right this side.

0:12:31 > 0:12:33You're all right.

0:12:33 > 0:12:35Yes!

0:12:35 > 0:12:39- Oh!- Four-wheel drive!- It is four-wheel drive, you half-wit.

0:12:39 > 0:12:41Well, why are the front wheels not doing anything?

0:12:41 > 0:12:45- Don't tell me they don't work. - Try again!- Say when...

0:12:45 > 0:12:47- OK!- It's not good!

0:12:47 > 0:12:49That's stuck now.

0:12:49 > 0:12:53'The whole weight of James' three-wheel drive Suzuki

0:12:53 > 0:12:55'was resting on our ramp.

0:12:55 > 0:12:57'So we had to build another one.'

0:12:58 > 0:13:01- You're all right.- Right.

0:13:01 > 0:13:03Range Rover, British engineering, don't let me down.

0:13:03 > 0:13:05To the left.

0:13:08 > 0:13:10Poo is coming out.

0:13:10 > 0:13:12Here we go!

0:13:16 > 0:13:21Now that's what I call four-wheel drive!

0:13:21 > 0:13:24Having rescued a man from the ooze,

0:13:24 > 0:13:28the mighty Range Rover would now rescue the Suzuki.

0:13:28 > 0:13:30There's only an ounce to pull.

0:13:30 > 0:13:33Please be gentle with this, Jeremy, and not a yob.

0:13:33 > 0:13:34Power!

0:13:37 > 0:13:39- Got him.- Stop, stop, stop!

0:13:39 > 0:13:41Yes, that's it!

0:13:43 > 0:13:45What a pillock!

0:13:45 > 0:13:48'I then lined up to pull the brakeless,

0:13:48 > 0:13:50'powerless Toyota down the ramp.'

0:13:52 > 0:13:56We were supposed to be averaging 100 miles a day.

0:13:56 > 0:13:59So far, we've done, well, I've done, about 20 feet.

0:14:02 > 0:14:03Ready?

0:14:03 > 0:14:05- No.- Right, he's ready. Gently.

0:14:05 > 0:14:07Oh, dear God.

0:14:07 > 0:14:08Go.

0:14:22 > 0:14:23Ha, ha, ha!

0:14:25 > 0:14:27'Finally, we were all off the raft.

0:14:27 > 0:14:31'And, as a reward, the producers gave us a box of things

0:14:31 > 0:14:34'to help us survive the perils that lay ahead.'

0:14:35 > 0:14:38Chainsaw. That's good, that's useful.

0:14:38 > 0:14:41- What is this?- I know what that is, that's a winch.

0:14:41 > 0:14:43Some rubber tubing.

0:14:43 > 0:14:47- Durex.- Condoms?- Vaseline.

0:14:47 > 0:14:50Tampax...and...

0:14:50 > 0:14:52- Viagra.- I know we're gonna be in the jungle together,

0:14:52 > 0:14:56- but that's a bit extreme.- What kind of party are they planning?

0:14:56 > 0:14:58'We loaded up the Ann Summers box...'

0:15:00 > 0:15:02'..jump started Hammond's car...'

0:15:02 > 0:15:06- Yee-ha!- Is that working? - Now you're gonna see!

0:15:06 > 0:15:09Go! Fire it up! Jungle!

0:15:09 > 0:15:11'..and got cracking.'

0:15:17 > 0:15:20'The jungle was a worthy adversary.'

0:15:23 > 0:15:24Oh!

0:15:26 > 0:15:30'But, for hour after hour, we battled our way through.'

0:15:34 > 0:15:36Do you want more?

0:15:36 > 0:15:38This is the marker!

0:15:40 > 0:15:43- Rainforest. Shit.- Good job!

0:15:50 > 0:15:53Guys...I left my phone down by the river.

0:15:53 > 0:15:54Oh, God.

0:15:54 > 0:15:57- Dipstick.- I'm going to have to go and get it.

0:15:57 > 0:15:59Just wait here, I'll go get it.

0:15:59 > 0:16:00Take care.

0:16:00 > 0:16:06Oh! Oh, mate. Finally, we are making progress.

0:16:06 > 0:16:08- Hammond!- Yeah?

0:16:08 > 0:16:10Did I leave it on that rock?

0:16:10 > 0:16:15No, it was on the stump I tied the raft too. Just by the rock.

0:16:15 > 0:16:16- OK, got it!- OK.

0:16:16 > 0:16:17- Got it.- Good.- Let's move!

0:16:17 > 0:16:20Now we're making progress, let's keep up the momentum.

0:16:21 > 0:16:24'Soon, we found a logging track

0:16:24 > 0:16:27'where finally we could get to know our cars.'

0:16:28 > 0:16:31Time to find out what is working on my Range Rover.

0:16:31 > 0:16:35All these dials in the middle made by Smiths - so, no.

0:16:35 > 0:16:37Speedo, no.

0:16:38 > 0:16:42The Range Rover was designed by a man called Charles Spencer-King,

0:16:42 > 0:16:45who was, no question, a genius.

0:16:45 > 0:16:50Unfortunately, it was then made in the Midlands,

0:16:50 > 0:16:54just "that'll do". Everything was "that'll do".

0:16:54 > 0:17:00An UNBELIEVABLE piece of design, ruined by minkies.

0:17:00 > 0:17:02That said, however,

0:17:02 > 0:17:07I seem to have bought the only 1980s Range Rover in the world that works.

0:17:10 > 0:17:15Given that Land Cruisers are legendarily reliable and bulletproof,

0:17:15 > 0:17:17this one isn't.

0:17:17 > 0:17:22Oil pressure gauge, not working. Temperature gauge, not working.

0:17:22 > 0:17:24Fuel gauge...dunno.

0:17:24 > 0:17:26Brakes not working.

0:17:26 > 0:17:28That makes this one more special.

0:17:28 > 0:17:33I have bought the only malfunctioning Land Cruiser in the world.

0:17:33 > 0:17:37And it is unique and therefore probably priceless.

0:17:41 > 0:17:43'Sure, my Suzuki only had three-wheel drive,

0:17:43 > 0:17:47'but I wasn't going to let that tiny detail spoil the day.'

0:17:48 > 0:17:51You're probably looking at this Suzuki and thinking,

0:17:51 > 0:17:55"It's small and comical, it's a toy off-road, it's for hairdressers,"

0:17:55 > 0:17:59And all the rest of it, but I'll tell you what it is - it's plucky.

0:17:59 > 0:18:01It's a bit like Finland in the war.

0:18:01 > 0:18:04Look at Jeremy's Range Rover lumbering along

0:18:04 > 0:18:06this great, heavy beast of burden.

0:18:06 > 0:18:10- this is like a little mountain goat, it just skips along.- 'May?'

0:18:10 > 0:18:13Talk of the devil. Hello.

0:18:13 > 0:18:16Just to let you know, one of your rear lights is hanging off,

0:18:16 > 0:18:19but it's OK, I can mend it for you with a small Phillips on my belt.

0:18:19 > 0:18:23The voice there of the missing member of Van Halen.

0:18:31 > 0:18:34'Darkness fell, but the temperature didn't.'

0:18:34 > 0:18:40How can it be this hot at midnight? How's that possible?

0:18:40 > 0:18:44'Hammond, however, had more to worry about than the heat.'

0:18:44 > 0:18:46Ow! What the BLEEP is that?

0:18:46 > 0:18:51There's something in here squeaking at me, I'm... Oh, ho!

0:18:51 > 0:18:53Bleurgh! Ah!

0:18:53 > 0:18:57Oh! OH! What is that?!

0:18:57 > 0:18:59Oh! BLEEP.

0:18:59 > 0:19:02I can't stand that! I can't stand that! I've gotta get out!

0:19:04 > 0:19:07'Blashford-Hammond insisted we made camp,

0:19:07 > 0:19:10'where, to cheer him up, I read him some bedtime stories.'

0:19:11 > 0:19:14This is a book about all the creatures

0:19:14 > 0:19:18that live in the rainforest that Mr Sting hasn't told us about.

0:19:18 > 0:19:21Would you like to hear about the...

0:19:21 > 0:19:24Brazilian Wandering Spider?

0:19:24 > 0:19:26Not really, no.

0:19:26 > 0:19:30"Causes around five human fatalities a year...

0:19:30 > 0:19:32"lives on the forest floor."

0:19:33 > 0:19:35SCREECHING

0:19:35 > 0:19:36What is that?

0:19:36 > 0:19:40Head torch. I'm looking for... What's it called? Wandering Spider.

0:19:40 > 0:19:43Ooh, the botfly. Now, this is a marvellous thing.

0:19:43 > 0:19:45"The botfly cannot sting a human directly,

0:19:45 > 0:19:47"but catches smaller insects,

0:19:47 > 0:19:51"lays its larvae upon them and then releases them.

0:19:51 > 0:19:54"If the smaller, host insect then bites the human,

0:19:54 > 0:19:57"the botfly larvae are impregnated into the skin.

0:19:57 > 0:20:00"The larvae then pupates inside the skin,

0:20:00 > 0:20:03"at which point they EAT their way out and fly away.

0:20:03 > 0:20:08"The BBC Natural History Unit reports the case of a man

0:20:08 > 0:20:11"who was bitten behind the ear and kept awake at night

0:20:11 > 0:20:15"by the sound of the botfly larvae eating the flesh inside his head."

0:20:16 > 0:20:19'Hammond didn't have a good night.'

0:20:19 > 0:20:20What's that?

0:20:20 > 0:20:22Argh! Argh!

0:20:22 > 0:20:23Stick insect!

0:20:23 > 0:20:25There's big things on my head!

0:20:25 > 0:20:26Oh, what is that?!

0:20:26 > 0:20:29There's something just flew in my hair and it's squeaking at me!

0:20:29 > 0:20:31It's big! It's really...

0:20:33 > 0:20:36'And, to be honest, he didn't have a great morning either.'

0:20:36 > 0:20:39Who has done this?!

0:20:43 > 0:20:48'To get away from the creepy-crawlies, I sought refuge in my car.'

0:20:48 > 0:20:51OK. Guys?

0:20:51 > 0:20:54Ooh. There is a snake in your car.

0:20:54 > 0:20:56He's coming up here. He's coming up here.

0:20:56 > 0:20:59It's known locally as "the big vicious killer snake."

0:20:59 > 0:21:01Thanks.

0:21:01 > 0:21:07Our raggedy convoy hit the trail with Hammond still moaning.

0:21:07 > 0:21:08Who's got my trouser-leg?

0:21:08 > 0:21:10Has your trouser-leg gone missing?

0:21:10 > 0:21:17'We soldiered on with the Range Rover up front, forging a path through the dense jungle.'

0:21:17 > 0:21:21Look at it - rescuing other cars, ploughing through here.

0:21:21 > 0:21:25My sweat being soaked up by the floor!

0:21:28 > 0:21:32But soon, the strain of point duty began to show.

0:21:32 > 0:21:37This is now smelling hot, this car.

0:21:39 > 0:21:45I can smell Jeremy's Range Rover from back here - it smells of imminent failure.

0:21:45 > 0:21:46'I was right.'

0:21:49 > 0:21:52Range Rover's just stopped working.

0:21:57 > 0:22:01That honestly wasn't very funny three series ago and it's not funny now.

0:22:01 > 0:22:05I'm not doing it on purpose. No, I haven't got any brakes. That's how I stop.

0:22:08 > 0:22:13Oh, no. Oh... No. James, it's over-heated.

0:22:13 > 0:22:14What a rotten bit of luck.

0:22:14 > 0:22:17Missing! Broken!

0:22:17 > 0:22:22Your fault, because I have been forging a path through this stuff.

0:22:22 > 0:22:26Bamboo has gone into it and broken my fan and now my engine's overheating.

0:22:26 > 0:22:30The plucky Brit has wounded itself helping you out.

0:22:30 > 0:22:34Your plucky British car has been defeated by... What was it? Bamboo?

0:22:34 > 0:22:40How did it get in there? What kind of design is it if a piece of bamboo can get in there and break the fan?

0:22:40 > 0:22:42Bamboo?!

0:22:42 > 0:22:45Without this, would you still be on the boat?

0:22:45 > 0:22:48- Yes, you would.- Yes. You would still be on the river-bank.

0:22:48 > 0:22:50This is the hero of the day.

0:22:50 > 0:22:56We passed the time by bickering until the engine had cooled down.

0:22:56 > 0:22:59- I love the V8 rumble.- Nice.

0:22:59 > 0:23:00It's very mighty.

0:23:00 > 0:23:03ENGINE STARTS

0:23:04 > 0:23:05Yes!

0:23:05 > 0:23:09The mighty Spitfire is down, but not out.

0:23:12 > 0:23:14'We battled on through the undergrowth.'

0:23:16 > 0:23:18There, that's a gear.

0:23:30 > 0:23:32We did that without breaking anything.

0:23:32 > 0:23:34Whoa!

0:23:40 > 0:23:43'Eventually, Hammond and May stopped.'

0:23:44 > 0:23:46Sorry!

0:23:46 > 0:23:50Because we had reached a small gully.

0:23:50 > 0:23:51That's pretty steep.

0:23:51 > 0:23:52What?!

0:23:52 > 0:23:57- That's a bit of a gully, I think they call it.- I'm just going to drive down and out the other side.

0:23:57 > 0:23:58No. You can't.

0:23:58 > 0:24:01What is the biggest strength with the Range Rover?

0:24:01 > 0:24:04The wheel hits the bottom before the front of the car.

0:24:04 > 0:24:07If you look at a Porsche Cayenne or your car,

0:24:07 > 0:24:10there's about 18 feet of car in front of the wheels.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12This car cannot do that. It won't make...

0:24:12 > 0:24:15I'm going down. You two, stand back.

0:24:15 > 0:24:18Watch and learn.

0:24:18 > 0:24:22If you believe something will happen, it will happen.

0:24:22 > 0:24:24Low range. That was reverse.

0:24:24 > 0:24:26Pointless handbrake off.

0:24:35 > 0:24:36Oh, Lord.

0:24:36 > 0:24:38Oh, brilliant.

0:24:38 > 0:24:40Yeah, so you're now stuck in a whole.

0:24:40 > 0:24:43Just lock the diffs. Just...

0:24:43 > 0:24:48You great, dozy, woolly-haired pillock.

0:24:48 > 0:24:51- It needs to be winched out. - I knew that a while back.

0:24:51 > 0:24:54'I fired up the winch on my Suzuki.'

0:24:54 > 0:24:57James, winch me up.

0:24:57 > 0:24:59Is it moving?

0:24:59 > 0:25:02- It's coming.- It's trying hard.

0:25:02 > 0:25:04Come on.

0:25:04 > 0:25:07It is coming free.

0:25:07 > 0:25:11- Uh, guys?- Oh, my God. Uh, James. - It won't stop.

0:25:15 > 0:25:16That didn't work.

0:25:16 > 0:25:20- Go on, then. Drive it out. - It won't drive out. It just won't.

0:25:20 > 0:25:23'Mystic Hammond was right.'

0:25:31 > 0:25:33That nearly worked.

0:25:33 > 0:25:36'At last, my Toyota could regain some dignity.

0:25:36 > 0:25:40'First pulling out the Suzuki and then the idiot's Range Rover.'

0:25:42 > 0:25:46Whoa! I'm hanging.

0:25:51 > 0:25:55Look at my little donkey pulling the Range Rover out.

0:25:56 > 0:26:00'We realised we'd have to build a bridge,

0:26:00 > 0:26:03'which made one of us very excited.'

0:26:03 > 0:26:05I am the god of hellfire.

0:26:05 > 0:26:07Has he got a chainsaw?

0:26:07 > 0:26:08CHAINSAW STARTS

0:26:08 > 0:26:10Oh, yes!

0:26:10 > 0:26:11Oh, God!

0:26:18 > 0:26:22'We set about building our bridge.

0:26:27 > 0:26:33'And since James had the lightest car, Jeremy and I decided he should go first.'

0:26:33 > 0:26:39I declare this ready, steady, strong. Get in your car and drive over.

0:26:43 > 0:26:44Left!

0:26:44 > 0:26:49Looks like your back wheels are beautiful, actually.

0:26:49 > 0:26:51I think you're about right from this side.

0:26:51 > 0:26:55'What James really needed at this point was clear instructions from us two.'

0:26:55 > 0:26:59If anything, a little bit left. Little bit left, James.

0:26:59 > 0:27:01I'm sorry. On this side, I would say, not left.

0:27:01 > 0:27:03Left or right?

0:27:03 > 0:27:07James, what I'd do at this point is power.

0:27:07 > 0:27:09Maximum power.

0:27:09 > 0:27:12You're going to need to engage... There you go. There you go.

0:27:12 > 0:27:16ENGINE REVS

0:27:16 > 0:27:18Now, we're talking.

0:27:18 > 0:27:22'Eventually, the three-wheel drive Suzuki made it.

0:27:22 > 0:27:27'So then, as night fell, it was Jeremy's turn,

0:27:27 > 0:27:31'in the much heavier and much wider Range Rover.'

0:27:31 > 0:27:33Whoa!

0:27:33 > 0:27:38Left hand down. Think of it as going on the outer log on this side.

0:27:38 > 0:27:42- It's not looking good from where I am.- No, I imagine not.

0:27:42 > 0:27:44I can't see the back wheel.

0:27:44 > 0:27:48It's all right. Keep going...I think.

0:27:48 > 0:27:49You're about to touch down.

0:27:54 > 0:27:57Nice work! Oh.

0:27:57 > 0:28:00God almighty, that was scary.

0:28:00 > 0:28:05'As I lined up, it was almost completely dark.'

0:28:05 > 0:28:08Hammond, I'm afraid, we simply can't see anything.

0:28:08 > 0:28:10We don't know.

0:28:10 > 0:28:13- Left a bit. - This is quite frightening.

0:28:13 > 0:28:15Stop.

0:28:15 > 0:28:17Oh, I've got no brakes!

0:28:17 > 0:28:19Hang on. Hang on.

0:28:19 > 0:28:20Come on.

0:28:24 > 0:28:28Right, you've got the front wheels on, mate.

0:28:28 > 0:28:30Make it so. Let's see if it can make this verge.

0:28:30 > 0:28:32Lovely.

0:28:32 > 0:28:36Oh, that feels good. Ha!

0:28:38 > 0:28:43'We drove on through the night with the charms of the rainforest starting to wear quite thin.'

0:28:43 > 0:28:47It is extraordinary if you think about it.

0:28:47 > 0:28:51In South America, there are no elephants, kangaroos,

0:28:51 > 0:28:54lions, hyenas, honey badgers.

0:28:54 > 0:28:58There's nothing interesting at all. It's all just insects designed

0:28:58 > 0:29:04to make you have a debilitating, agonising death.

0:29:04 > 0:29:06I'd love to know how hot this engine is.

0:29:06 > 0:29:09Very is what I'm thinking.

0:29:09 > 0:29:14'So when we made camp that night,

0:29:14 > 0:29:16'I decided to cut some vents in the bonnet.'

0:29:22 > 0:29:25- Jeremy, my car's on fire. - Well, put beer on it.

0:29:25 > 0:29:29There's a fire extinguisher in the car.

0:29:29 > 0:29:32- You set my car on fire. - I haven't got my glasses.

0:29:32 > 0:29:35Pull the bloody pin out. You burned my Toyota!

0:29:35 > 0:29:38Thank you. Yeah.

0:29:45 > 0:29:49Right, day three... Four!

0:29:56 > 0:30:00Uh, it clings.

0:30:00 > 0:30:03OK.

0:30:04 > 0:30:09Ladies and gentlemen, David Lee Roth in the morning. Here he is.

0:30:09 > 0:30:11James?

0:30:15 > 0:30:18What we've done... Don't do that.

0:30:18 > 0:30:21What we've done is accidentally camped on a road.

0:30:21 > 0:30:23Who's this bloke on a bike?

0:30:23 > 0:30:27- Morning.- Morning.

0:30:27 > 0:30:31He's going to work and we're camping on the A1.

0:30:35 > 0:30:37Yup.

0:30:44 > 0:30:48I can't remember if I took my malaria pill this morning.

0:30:48 > 0:30:52If I were a girl, I'd be pregnant a lot.

0:30:52 > 0:30:57If you're watching this in smellovision, I apologise because the smell in here is disgusting.

0:30:57 > 0:30:58It's me.

0:30:58 > 0:31:01I absolutely reek!

0:31:01 > 0:31:05Luckily, we then got a shower.

0:31:09 > 0:31:12Well, one of us did.

0:31:12 > 0:31:19- Hammond?- Yes.- How wet are you getting in this rain?

0:31:19 > 0:31:21It's not bad, actually.

0:31:21 > 0:31:25It's quite a lot wetter here.

0:31:25 > 0:31:28How can the rain be heavier there that it is over here?

0:31:30 > 0:31:32That's a river.

0:31:34 > 0:31:38'It was indeed a river and one that we'd have to cross

0:31:38 > 0:31:44'which meant that we'd have to use stuff from the Ann Summers chest to waterproof our cars.'

0:31:44 > 0:31:48- Right. These are condoms.- Do you two need some time to yourselves?

0:31:50 > 0:31:54- Have you got those Tampax? - Wh... What?!

0:31:54 > 0:31:57- What are you planning? - I'll tell you my big problem.

0:31:57 > 0:32:00It's my fuel filler cap. If water gets in there...

0:32:00 > 0:32:02You're in a lot of trouble.

0:32:02 > 0:32:03If I put a Tampax in there,

0:32:03 > 0:32:06it will expand width-ways and I've seen the adverts.

0:32:06 > 0:32:09I'll be able to go roller-blading with a poodle

0:32:09 > 0:32:13or drive a Range Rover through a river in the Amazon delta.

0:32:13 > 0:32:18James was suspiciously skilful with the Vaseline and the condoms.

0:32:18 > 0:32:21And soon, we were ready to enter the river.

0:32:23 > 0:32:26HE HUMS

0:32:30 > 0:32:36Now, do I follow in Hammond's wheel-marks on the basis that we know how deep it is,

0:32:36 > 0:32:41or do I think, "He's an incompetent fool and go somewhere else?"

0:32:41 > 0:32:46'As it turned out, I was an incompetent fool.'

0:32:46 > 0:32:47That's looking DEEP!

0:32:47 > 0:32:50Oh-ho!

0:32:50 > 0:32:53Please, keep going. Little donkey, swim!

0:32:53 > 0:32:58Swim, swim. There you go.

0:32:58 > 0:33:02This is when, suddenly, the Land Cruiser comes into its own.

0:33:02 > 0:33:05Yeah, there's maybe more comfortable things that will get you there,

0:33:05 > 0:33:08but the Land Cruiser will always get you home.

0:33:08 > 0:33:10Meanwhile...

0:33:10 > 0:33:13It's stopped!

0:33:13 > 0:33:16Aah! Water's coming in to my car.

0:33:16 > 0:33:20'This caused problems for James.'

0:33:20 > 0:33:23You're going to have to go round the outside.

0:33:23 > 0:33:27Straight ahead there. I'll tell you when to go right hand down.

0:33:27 > 0:33:29Good. There.

0:33:31 > 0:33:34Oh, God!

0:33:34 > 0:33:36Cock!

0:33:36 > 0:33:39Good, good. That's two. OK.

0:33:39 > 0:33:42Why did I listen to you, you imbecile!

0:33:42 > 0:33:48'Rather than accept another winch from the Toyota, the Range Rover decided to start on its own.'

0:33:48 > 0:33:52ENGINE STARTS

0:33:52 > 0:33:53Ha-ha!

0:33:53 > 0:33:59'Thus removing the obstacle James had been trying to avoid when he got stuck.'

0:33:59 > 0:34:02As far as I can work out, he's dragging it even deeper.

0:34:02 > 0:34:05HE LAUGHS

0:34:05 > 0:34:06Hoi, it's floating.

0:34:08 > 0:34:11There's a lot of bubbles came out of your petrol-filler cap.

0:34:11 > 0:34:13- That's air.- But they've been replaced with water.

0:34:13 > 0:34:17'This whole episode made James very angry.'

0:34:17 > 0:34:20If you hadn't tried to be clever and if your car wasn't so unreliable,

0:34:20 > 0:34:26I wouldn't have had to go round the outside in my small off-roader and I wouldn't have sunk.

0:34:26 > 0:34:29- Unreliable?!- It stalled! It stalled! - It started again.

0:34:29 > 0:34:32Mine will start again.

0:34:34 > 0:34:36The rainforest is just getting worse.

0:34:36 > 0:34:42I'll tell you something, if you look over there, would you not think it's getting thinner?

0:34:48 > 0:34:54'It was and soon, our battered cars emerged from the trees.

0:34:54 > 0:35:00'At last, we were out of the spider-infested sweatbox.

0:35:00 > 0:35:08'But ten minutes later, James and Richard wished they were back in it.'

0:35:11 > 0:35:13Oh, God!

0:35:17 > 0:35:19Stop it!

0:35:21 > 0:35:26Just answer me this simple question, how comfortable are you two right now?

0:35:27 > 0:35:34It's like a big, feather mattress. I really am...relaxing. Yeah.

0:35:35 > 0:35:38Oh, Jesus!

0:35:38 > 0:35:42Have I broken James' spine? There will be two Ted Nugents in a minute.

0:35:44 > 0:35:49Oh, I'm so sick of that noise! Stop rattling at me!

0:35:52 > 0:35:55# Oh, Grace, you're getting away with it

0:35:55 > 0:35:59# Words but nothing to say with it

0:35:59 > 0:36:02# Smile and take what you need

0:36:02 > 0:36:05# In any way that you please

0:36:05 > 0:36:10# Grace, you're getting away with it... #

0:36:18 > 0:36:22We spent the night in a town where there were baths and bedrooms

0:36:22 > 0:36:25and then we hit the road once more.

0:36:27 > 0:36:30Oh, here we are. This is cocaine country.

0:36:30 > 0:36:33Kate Moss's delicatessen.

0:36:36 > 0:36:39Obviously we can't drive through this region

0:36:39 > 0:36:43without registering our disgust at the violent, reprehensible drugs trade

0:36:43 > 0:36:46that brings misery to so many millions.

0:36:53 > 0:36:57May, have you seen what Hammond has written on his car?

0:36:57 > 0:37:00Yeah, I don't think he's understood what we're trying to do here.

0:37:00 > 0:37:05Hammond, are you feeling ashamed of yourself?

0:37:05 > 0:37:10- There was an opportunity and I took it.- But what about the untold misery to millions?

0:37:10 > 0:37:15"Untold misery to millions"? Are the ratings really that good?

0:37:15 > 0:37:16Ha ha ha.

0:37:19 > 0:37:25As we left town, we started to climb and that was a problem for the Range Rover.

0:37:25 > 0:37:30Every time we go up any form of gradient, for any period of time,

0:37:30 > 0:37:36the engine gets very, very warm. Still nothing's working apart from the demist.

0:37:36 > 0:37:41'Soon the engine became so hot, I had to get radical.'

0:37:41 > 0:37:45The scope of my engineering genius, literally, knows no bounds.

0:37:45 > 0:37:49Because, as you can see, the vents I cut in the bonnet

0:37:49 > 0:37:51are now windows.

0:37:51 > 0:37:56So I can see where I'm going, the engine is cool. All is well.

0:38:00 > 0:38:04Sooner or later, Jeremy has to admit that the Range Rover isn't working properly.

0:38:04 > 0:38:12We were only 110 miles from La Paz, but between us and it was the Camino Del Muerte -

0:38:12 > 0:38:17the death road - the most dangerous highway in the world.

0:38:20 > 0:38:25Over the years, the sheer, unguarded drops have claimed hundreds of lives.

0:38:26 > 0:38:32And to make matters worse, Captain Terrified-of-heights didn't really have the car for the job.

0:38:32 > 0:38:34- James?- Yes.

0:38:34 > 0:38:38I don't know about the rear suspension design on a Suzuki.

0:38:38 > 0:38:42The shock absorber is traditionally attached at both ends. That's not absorbing shocks.

0:38:42 > 0:38:44It's bouncing around on the spring.

0:38:44 > 0:38:47That does affect your control quite badly - not having a shock absorber.

0:38:47 > 0:38:51I'm glad you said that up here, Hammond, on my favourite road.

0:38:51 > 0:38:53- Hang on, before you go.- What?

0:38:53 > 0:38:58I genuinely don't like heights. It's my biggest failing, among many - I accept.

0:38:58 > 0:39:03You know the, you drive into the back of my car and it's very funny, joke?

0:39:03 > 0:39:06Oh, you want me to drive into him?

0:39:06 > 0:39:10I'll cut your BLEEP head off. You will need a beep there, BBC Two.

0:39:10 > 0:39:12I can understand that.

0:39:16 > 0:39:21Uh, my car is perfect in every way, apart from it not starting.

0:39:21 > 0:39:27So could you, if you wouldn't mind, push me?

0:39:27 > 0:39:32- So you want me to push your car with my car, now, on this road here?- Yes.

0:39:32 > 0:39:34There's no alternative.

0:39:34 > 0:39:36OK, here I come.

0:39:36 > 0:39:37Careful, careful.

0:39:37 > 0:39:38BUMPER CRUNCHES

0:39:38 > 0:39:41I wasn't as careful as I could have been. Sorry.

0:39:41 > 0:39:43HE SNIGGERS

0:39:46 > 0:39:51Pretty soon, we saw why the road had earned its name.

0:39:55 > 0:39:58God almighty, that is high!

0:40:05 > 0:40:08That is a massive, massive drop!

0:40:16 > 0:40:18This is insane.

0:40:20 > 0:40:21Whoa!

0:40:21 > 0:40:26The grasses stick up and you don't necessarily see what a long way down it is,

0:40:26 > 0:40:28then you get one of those gaps...

0:40:28 > 0:40:31..and you see down and it is a long way.

0:40:31 > 0:40:34There's one there.

0:40:35 > 0:40:38'The dust didn't help either.'

0:40:38 > 0:40:42Oh, gee. Look at that. That's narrow.

0:40:42 > 0:40:45HORN TOOTS

0:40:51 > 0:40:54I don't understand the rules on this road.

0:40:54 > 0:40:58You seem to drive one minute on the left and one minute on the right.

0:40:58 > 0:41:02Sometimes the lorry stops to let you go through. Sometimes they don't.

0:41:02 > 0:41:08Some lorries pull over, others come barrelling up behind you doing three and a half times the speed of sound.

0:41:08 > 0:41:10It's completely baffling.

0:41:10 > 0:41:12Thank you.

0:41:15 > 0:41:19I'm coming up against the truck. I've got to go past him

0:41:19 > 0:41:24and that means going on that side.

0:41:28 > 0:41:29Looking straight ahead.

0:41:29 > 0:41:33Breathe.

0:41:33 > 0:41:37Moments later, James slowed down to let a mad local get past.

0:41:37 > 0:41:39HORN TOOTS

0:41:39 > 0:41:42Does that mean there's one of those maniacal taxi drivers?

0:41:42 > 0:41:44..and I didn't.

0:41:44 > 0:41:45Oh, God!

0:41:45 > 0:41:48BUMPERS CRUNCH

0:41:50 > 0:41:55- Sorry, I was watching the taxi. - You're now going to get macheted to death.

0:41:55 > 0:41:59- I was watching the taxi!- I don't care. Did I or did I not warn you?

0:41:59 > 0:42:03James is killing Jeremy, but things are going well.

0:42:03 > 0:42:07- I was watching the taxi.- You weren't.- I was watching the taxi.

0:42:07 > 0:42:11- Did your co-presenter just attack you with a machete?- Yes, he did.

0:42:11 > 0:42:16- He was quite cross cos I ran into him.- That doesn't happen on clothes programmes or gardening shows.

0:42:21 > 0:42:28'As we climbed higher, life in the already battered Toyota became truly terrifying.'

0:42:28 > 0:42:31That's my steering. I'm inches from death, there.

0:42:31 > 0:42:34The steering wheel doesn't do anything.

0:42:34 > 0:42:37My brakes stick when I'm going uphill so the clutch slips.

0:42:39 > 0:42:41I can't breathe because the dust gets in.

0:42:41 > 0:42:44Oh, God! That's real fear now.

0:42:44 > 0:42:48Going downhill, the same brakes that stick on going uphill, don't stop me.

0:42:48 > 0:42:50Ugh!

0:42:52 > 0:42:55'The Suzuki too was showing the strain.'

0:42:55 > 0:42:57BLEEP.

0:42:57 > 0:42:59HE GROWLS

0:42:59 > 0:43:04- What is the matter?- It's got dirt in the fuel system from the river.

0:43:04 > 0:43:08- So it's broken?- It's not broken. Occasionally, a bit of it goes through.

0:43:08 > 0:43:10Your simple, cheap car is broken.

0:43:10 > 0:43:17'Sticking to the code of the Top Gear brotherhood, I left James and Richard behind.'

0:43:19 > 0:43:23It just goes to show they are badly-made these Japanese cars. They're badly-made.

0:43:25 > 0:43:28'James and I decided to stick together.'

0:43:28 > 0:43:34He's never going to go round us. My God, he is.

0:43:34 > 0:43:36That's insane.

0:43:43 > 0:43:46Right. I'm in a ditch.

0:43:47 > 0:43:49OK.

0:43:49 > 0:43:52I didn't see this.

0:43:52 > 0:43:54Whoa-ho! What a thing to miss.

0:43:54 > 0:43:55Right.

0:43:55 > 0:43:59'No biggie, though, because my colleague would winch me out in a jiffy.'

0:43:59 > 0:44:04- Hold on.- What? - The winch isn't working.

0:44:11 > 0:44:18I'm now all on my own on Death Road. I have no idea where Ray Mears and Ted Nugent are.

0:44:18 > 0:44:21They've just disappeared. We have no phones. They're not on the radio.

0:44:21 > 0:44:23They could be dead.

0:44:25 > 0:44:31'We would, in fact, be dead quite soon, judging by the mood of the angry, stuck locals.'

0:44:31 > 0:44:35- Good luck.- Thank you. - Handbrake off etc.

0:44:38 > 0:44:42- The ditch is going to level out so it'll be fine.- There you go.

0:44:42 > 0:44:43What a nice man.

0:44:43 > 0:44:51'Soon, though, I wished I'd stayed in the ditch because the Toyota developed yet another fault.'

0:44:51 > 0:44:56Something's broken on that back corner.

0:44:56 > 0:45:00This is pretty close to unbearable now.

0:45:01 > 0:45:02Christ!

0:45:02 > 0:45:06Meanwhile, very far ahead...

0:45:06 > 0:45:10I'm now 5,500 feet above sea level and still climbing.

0:45:11 > 0:45:13Oh, God, crosses.

0:45:16 > 0:45:18A lot of crosses there.

0:45:18 > 0:45:23And then, underneath a waterfall, I learned why there were so many crosses up here.

0:45:31 > 0:45:32Oh, my God.

0:45:32 > 0:45:35No.

0:45:35 > 0:45:37Oh, my...

0:45:37 > 0:45:39Stop there!

0:45:57 > 0:46:00That is going. That is going.

0:46:12 > 0:46:15- CREAKING - Bloody hell.

0:46:30 > 0:46:32We were still miles back.

0:46:32 > 0:46:37It was almost dark and, worse still, James' alternator wasn't charging the battery.

0:46:37 > 0:46:43How much is running your car with headlights on going to shorten the life of the battery

0:46:43 > 0:46:44and then kill the engine?

0:46:44 > 0:46:46I don't know exactly, but by quite a bit.

0:46:46 > 0:46:50They're already getting a bit dim, to be honest.

0:46:50 > 0:46:52God, this is murder.

0:46:52 > 0:46:54Pretty soon, the inevitable happened.

0:46:56 > 0:47:00My car is now dead and without a new battery.

0:47:00 > 0:47:05'Since the alternator was one of the few things working on the Toyota,

0:47:05 > 0:47:08'I swapped my live battery for James' dead one.'

0:47:08 > 0:47:11- I think it was good of me to donate my battery.- Yes, it was.

0:47:11 > 0:47:14Yes, it was. This time, we're not going to run with your lights off.

0:47:14 > 0:47:17No, OK. We'll use the torches.

0:47:17 > 0:47:18Hang on a minute.

0:47:23 > 0:47:27OK, I've waited till nightfall here at the summit of the death road.

0:47:27 > 0:47:31My colleagues aren't here, which means they must be dead.

0:47:31 > 0:47:34I've therefore made them these rather touching memorials.

0:47:39 > 0:47:41With the torches fitted,

0:47:41 > 0:47:44this was my view of Death Road.

0:47:47 > 0:47:52Hammond, I want to say something to you that I wouldn't say at any other time.

0:47:52 > 0:47:53'What?'

0:47:53 > 0:47:55Please don't leave me.

0:47:55 > 0:48:00Oh, God, those words will stay with me. I'll struggle to get over that. No, I won't.

0:48:14 > 0:48:18The next morning, we were all reunited in La Paz,

0:48:18 > 0:48:22the world's highest and worst capital city.

0:48:22 > 0:48:24But as we waited for our next instructions,

0:48:24 > 0:48:27the mood was frosty.

0:48:27 > 0:48:29- Are you ready?- No.

0:48:29 > 0:48:32- La Paz...- I still haven't actually forgiven you as such.

0:48:32 > 0:48:38It's not like we're being all matey now and have forgotten you abandoned us to die, just so you know.

0:48:38 > 0:48:40I couldn't go back to the hotel, eat steak, have a beer,

0:48:40 > 0:48:44- and go to bed feeling good if I'd just left my mates... - I had to go to bed.

0:48:44 > 0:48:47Then tell your mates the steak wasn't very good.

0:48:47 > 0:48:49I thought you were dead.

0:48:49 > 0:48:53- I had a simple ceremony up there for you.- Then what did you do? You went on.

0:48:53 > 0:48:55I said kind words about you.

0:48:55 > 0:48:59- What are we doing? Come on.- "Between La Paz and the Pacific Ocean,

0:48:59 > 0:49:05"there is the Altiplano where the altitude will cause you to have a pulmonary oedema.

0:49:05 > 0:49:08"Then there's the Andes where you'll have a cerebral oedema.

0:49:08 > 0:49:13"And then the Atacama which is 50 times drier than Death Valley.

0:49:13 > 0:49:16"It has never rained. It's the driest place on Earth

0:49:16 > 0:49:20"and there is no life, not even bacteria."

0:49:24 > 0:49:27Given that our lungs and brains would explode in the deserts

0:49:27 > 0:49:30and mountains that lay between us and the Pacific,

0:49:30 > 0:49:33we decided to modify our cars a bit.

0:49:33 > 0:49:37So it was time to find a workshop and cue the music.

0:49:37 > 0:49:41# Theme to "A Team"

0:49:41 > 0:49:43Have you got "Spider In Car" for Hammond?

0:49:43 > 0:49:45You can't see through the window!

0:49:45 > 0:49:46Stick to hammers.

0:49:46 > 0:49:49That's the precision tool board. The hammer lives elsewhere.

0:49:57 > 0:50:02The next day, we left La Paz well prepared for the trials that lay ahead.

0:50:02 > 0:50:06So, I've lifted the Land Cruiser, obviously. Very simple.

0:50:06 > 0:50:10Gives me room for the bigger, wider tyres I need for the desert sand.

0:50:10 > 0:50:13Roll cage for safety, obviously.

0:50:13 > 0:50:16Then to get rid of some of the weight, I've lost the doors

0:50:16 > 0:50:21because they were very heavy, and the roof and anything else I didn't need.

0:50:21 > 0:50:27What I've done to prepare for the desert is team a rather fetching hooded cardigan

0:50:27 > 0:50:31with some old combat trousers and some big wheels on my car.

0:50:34 > 0:50:37Wow, James has been busy.

0:50:37 > 0:50:38Woo, yes.

0:50:38 > 0:50:41You've modified that, mate.

0:50:41 > 0:50:45As you can see, what I've done with my car is mended it.

0:50:48 > 0:50:52The modifying brothers were very pleased with their results.

0:50:52 > 0:50:54- Yeah!- Ah!

0:50:54 > 0:50:58- I'm liking this.- Loving this!

0:50:58 > 0:51:01But after a few miles, the smiles had gone.

0:51:01 > 0:51:05Hammond, I've made my car worse.

0:51:05 > 0:51:10- How?- It won't ride properly and the tyres are catching on the wheel arches.

0:51:10 > 0:51:12It's got no power any more.

0:51:12 > 0:51:14Oh, God.

0:51:14 > 0:51:17I am having to work my engine quite hard.

0:51:17 > 0:51:21The problem is, you put bigger wheels on, it has the effect of gearing it up.

0:51:21 > 0:51:25First gear is like starting in third...it's hard work.

0:51:25 > 0:51:29The long and the short of it, I've rather ruined it.

0:51:29 > 0:51:32James has just overtaken me in his 1 oz box.

0:51:32 > 0:51:34RICHARD LAUGHS

0:51:34 > 0:51:38That face is smug, I don't like it.

0:51:40 > 0:51:43Because I'd made my car better,

0:51:43 > 0:51:45as we climbed onto the Altiplano,

0:51:45 > 0:51:48I could relax and enjoy the backdrop.

0:51:48 > 0:51:50Look at that sky.

0:51:50 > 0:51:53That's one of the best skies I've seen for a very long time.

0:52:01 > 0:52:06James, does it get hotter or colder when you're at altitude? I've forgotten.

0:52:06 > 0:52:11I'm pretty sure it gets much hotter. No, no, hang on. Colder.

0:52:11 > 0:52:17There's only one way we can accurately determine the temperature and that's by asking our colleague.

0:52:17 > 0:52:20I know what you're thinking, I'm fine.

0:52:24 > 0:52:27As darkness fell, we pulled into a petrol station.

0:52:27 > 0:52:32In the shop, we found a bit more than Kit Kats and pies.

0:52:32 > 0:52:37Wait a minute. Caramelised cocaine. That's something you don't see in every motorway service station.

0:52:37 > 0:52:41- Wow.- You take it and then you talk for hours.

0:52:41 > 0:52:43Let's have that.

0:52:43 > 0:52:48In fact, the sweet is made from coca leaves which are legal and used by locals

0:52:48 > 0:52:51to ward off the effects of altitude sickness.

0:52:51 > 0:52:53Hammond found them very moreish.

0:52:53 > 0:52:57They're nice, they're caramelised. I've had about six.

0:52:57 > 0:53:00Luckily, this had no effect at all.

0:53:00 > 0:53:05..all the camping gear, then when you got there, this was before the M5,

0:53:05 > 0:53:10there was like a high bit and a low bit and we used to say, "Is this the high/low bit?"

0:53:10 > 0:53:15And Mum and Dad would say, "Yeah". And then we knew how far it was to Weston.

0:53:15 > 0:53:19I always thought Bristol was a bit scruffy, but actually it's quite nice...

0:53:23 > 0:53:28The next morning, we woke on the staggeringly beautiful Bolivian high plains.

0:53:33 > 0:53:37We couldn't see this in the dark but it's absolutely breathtaking.

0:53:37 > 0:53:41- Look at it.- It's took my breath away.- There's no breath to take away.

0:53:41 > 0:53:43We're at 14,000 feet according to the gizmo.

0:53:43 > 0:53:49- 14,000?- 14,006 feet.- What's that? - This measures your sats.

0:53:49 > 0:53:53On Casualty, they always do this. They put one of these on their finger,

0:53:53 > 0:53:57and it's something to do with how much oxygen there is in your red blood cells.

0:53:57 > 0:54:02If it's less than 98 or 99, you've had it.

0:54:02 > 0:54:05- And Tina Hobley comes.- What's yours?

0:54:05 > 0:54:07- 87.- That's less.- Much less.

0:54:07 > 0:54:10- Where's Tina Hobley, then? - Just try yours.

0:54:10 > 0:54:12I bet you can't go less than 87.

0:54:12 > 0:54:13That's how ill I am.

0:54:13 > 0:54:18- 89.- 89? You're nearly dead.

0:54:18 > 0:54:19I AM dead.

0:54:19 > 0:54:24- 88, I'm not much better.- If you went into a doctor's surgery in England,

0:54:24 > 0:54:29- with sats of 88, they'd put you in hospital.- 84.

0:54:29 > 0:54:33In fact, the only thing in a dodgier state than me

0:54:33 > 0:54:35were the modifications on my car.

0:54:35 > 0:54:38- What's happened?- I've broken my front right spring.

0:54:38 > 0:54:41- Completely clean. Sheared it off both ends.- You're joking?

0:54:41 > 0:54:44Bloody hellfire.

0:54:44 > 0:54:46So that is supposed to be connected to that?

0:54:46 > 0:54:49Yep. It's snapped clean off.

0:54:51 > 0:54:54While trying to mend the modified suspension,

0:54:54 > 0:54:58- there was another problem. - Your prop shaft fell off.

0:54:58 > 0:55:02- What?- Your prop shaft just fell off.

0:55:02 > 0:55:07Since there was no AA to call, it took us all morning to get it fixed.

0:55:07 > 0:55:08Ooh!

0:55:08 > 0:55:11But eventually, we were off.

0:55:18 > 0:55:21And apart from James driving into a village well...

0:55:21 > 0:55:24- Sorry...- Leave it!

0:55:24 > 0:55:28..we made good progress toward the Chilean border.

0:55:28 > 0:55:31I'm in a fantastic desert, with my two mates.

0:55:31 > 0:55:36All the cars are working, look at that, look at that.

0:55:36 > 0:55:38It's great. It's an adventure.

0:55:41 > 0:55:44And soon, we reached a big milestone.

0:55:44 > 0:55:46One mile, James, and we've done it. Bolivia.

0:55:46 > 0:55:50Let's roll in as a threesome.

0:55:50 > 0:55:55You look at these three, you'd never believe they were still running!

0:55:55 > 0:55:57Most scrapyards would reject them.

0:55:57 > 0:56:03At the border post, we were given the traditional welcome.

0:56:03 > 0:56:07My arse!

0:56:11 > 0:56:17I hope he doesn't find the tampons. Or, rather worryingly, the Viagra.

0:56:21 > 0:56:28Drugs check over, we entered Chile, where the scenery became even more sensational.

0:56:34 > 0:56:36Those are flamingos, they actually are flamingos.

0:56:36 > 0:56:40I've never seen them in the wild. Wow.

0:56:40 > 0:56:44Unfortunately, we were still climbing.

0:56:44 > 0:56:48Are you ready? 45 feet to go.

0:56:48 > 0:56:5030 feet to go.

0:56:50 > 0:56:52Here it comes.

0:56:52 > 0:56:565, 4, 3... We're there!

0:56:56 > 0:56:5915,006 feet!

0:56:59 > 0:57:04- Ha!- We are now higher than the highest peak in Europe

0:57:04 > 0:57:07and we're still driving.

0:57:08 > 0:57:13Soon, the altitude would become a big issue.

0:57:18 > 0:57:23But the next day, Hammond had an even bigger one.

0:57:23 > 0:57:27- His clutch had gone.- Oh, God.

0:57:27 > 0:57:29Oh, come on!

0:57:29 > 0:57:33It won't come out of gear.

0:57:33 > 0:57:37I'm trying to rock it on the starter motor... Ah!

0:57:41 > 0:57:42There you go.

0:57:42 > 0:57:46We're away, into second, match the road speed...

0:57:46 > 0:57:48Ooh! Hey-hey! There we go.

0:57:51 > 0:57:56We've just pulled over here to wait for Hammond.

0:57:56 > 0:57:58Oh! Dust!

0:57:58 > 0:58:00Is that him?

0:58:00 > 0:58:02It is.

0:58:02 > 0:58:04- It is.- We're back as a three.

0:58:04 > 0:58:07Hammond!

0:58:07 > 0:58:11- The donkey lives! - Oh, yeah! It lives on.

0:58:11 > 0:58:15At this point, we had a decision to make.

0:58:15 > 0:58:18We can either go that way,

0:58:18 > 0:58:21which is very long,

0:58:21 > 0:58:22or we can go that way,

0:58:22 > 0:58:23which is short,

0:58:23 > 0:58:26but does mean driving over an active volcano.

0:58:28 > 0:58:29Short.

0:58:29 > 0:58:31- Volcano.- Short.- I agree.

0:58:31 > 0:58:33- Short.- Let's do it.

0:58:40 > 0:58:44As we climbed, the air became thinner and thinner.

0:58:50 > 0:58:5215,400.

0:58:52 > 0:58:54And climbing.

0:58:54 > 0:59:00We are, definitely, the highest motorists in the world.

0:59:00 > 0:59:03Apart from George Michael, obviously.

0:59:03 > 0:59:08Hammond's really got to think ahead with no clutch.

0:59:08 > 0:59:11He's gotta think ahead with a brain starved of oxygen.

0:59:14 > 0:59:19What is frightening is when I need to come to grab first to get up a steep bit.

0:59:19 > 0:59:20Changing down is harder.

0:59:20 > 0:59:24You have to guess how high the engine needs to be revving and slot the gear lever in

0:59:24 > 0:59:26without a clutch.

0:59:29 > 0:59:31James too was having problems.

0:59:31 > 0:59:33JUDDERING AND GRATING

0:59:36 > 0:59:40Oh, God, chaps, my transfer box is jammed.

0:59:42 > 0:59:45But these niggles were overshadowed by the big one.

0:59:46 > 0:59:49Up at this altitude, this engine is really struggling.

0:59:49 > 0:59:53For every litre of fuel vapour it gets through,

0:59:53 > 0:59:56it needs 14 litres of air.

0:59:56 > 0:59:57And there isn't any.

0:59:57 > 1:00:01- So, it's just like me... - HE GASPS

1:00:01 > 1:00:05That means it's so down on power.

1:00:05 > 1:00:10'Up here, James's car had, at best, 20 horsepower.

1:00:10 > 1:00:12'And as we climbed higher,

1:00:12 > 1:00:14'we started to suffer as well.'

1:00:14 > 1:00:18The breathlessness now is pretty acute.

1:00:19 > 1:00:22Just talking is...hard work.

1:00:24 > 1:00:26I'm starting to feel a bit...

1:00:26 > 1:00:28Jeez...no...I'm feeling really

1:00:28 > 1:00:30quite weird.

1:00:30 > 1:00:36'The terrain levelled out so we pulled over to catch what we could of our breath.'

1:00:36 > 1:00:39- Do you feel sort of drunk but it's not pleasant?- Yeah.

1:00:39 > 1:00:43Exactly that. My whole head... I've got room spin.

1:00:43 > 1:00:46'It was time for drastic action.'

1:00:46 > 1:00:48- Cyanide?- No.

1:00:48 > 1:00:49Viagra.

1:00:49 > 1:00:51- Eh?- Is this the time?

1:00:51 > 1:00:56Apparently, Viagra, for reasons unknown to science

1:00:56 > 1:00:58stops you having an oedema in your lung.

1:00:58 > 1:01:03- I thought it was more the trouser department it concentrated on. - That could be a side effect, yes.

1:01:03 > 1:01:05- Down the hatch.- Here we go.

1:01:08 > 1:01:11- Doesn't work. Nothing's happening. - I can't swallow it.

1:01:11 > 1:01:14- Nothing's happening. - I need a drink.

1:01:17 > 1:01:20I'm going to get a massive neck if I don't get some of that.

1:01:20 > 1:01:24Apparently...that will save our lives.

1:01:24 > 1:01:26- THEY LAUGH - Oh, God.

1:01:26 > 1:01:28I've just taken Viagra!

1:01:28 > 1:01:30- On top of the Andes. - CHUCKLING

1:01:32 > 1:01:36'Sadly, it didn't seem to have any effect at all.'

1:01:38 > 1:01:41I'm getting a headache and I'm feeling sick.

1:01:43 > 1:01:45Come on, come on.

1:01:45 > 1:01:48'The big question now was this -

1:01:48 > 1:01:53'which would give out first, the cars or the men?'

1:01:53 > 1:01:54Come on. Come on!

1:01:54 > 1:01:55Come on.

1:01:58 > 1:02:00Every gear change is so critical now.

1:02:00 > 1:02:03I get tense about it, that raises my heart.

1:02:03 > 1:02:06And then I need oxygen all the more.

1:02:09 > 1:02:12- Still there, Hammond?- Yeah, I'm still here. I have to go slow

1:02:12 > 1:02:15because I daren't risk changing up to third. I won't make it.

1:02:15 > 1:02:17'OK, mate, we'll slow down.'

1:02:17 > 1:02:20We're a team up here. Cos this isn't funny.

1:02:20 > 1:02:23God, Jeremy's talking about being a team.

1:02:24 > 1:02:26Must be the altitude.

1:02:27 > 1:02:30'At 16,700 feet,

1:02:30 > 1:02:33'the Toyota broke down again.'

1:02:33 > 1:02:35ENGINE STALLS

1:02:35 > 1:02:38'I think my transfer box has just gone.'

1:02:38 > 1:02:40'James and I stop to help.

1:02:40 > 1:02:42'And then we couldn't get going again.'

1:02:45 > 1:02:47The engines just aren't getting any air.

1:02:47 > 1:02:49At all.

1:02:49 > 1:02:51There's just no...er...

1:02:51 > 1:02:53James can't get his started.

1:02:53 > 1:02:55I can't get mine started.

1:02:56 > 1:02:58I haven't got any air to work.

1:03:01 > 1:03:05Once we get the Range Rover going, that's the most likely to start,

1:03:05 > 1:03:11- we can get everything started. Right. Can we move it?- Three, two, heave!

1:03:11 > 1:03:13- And go! - THEY STRAIN

1:03:13 > 1:03:18'Pushing a Range Rover at this altitude damn near killed us,

1:03:18 > 1:03:21'but eventually the big beast fired and once again,

1:03:21 > 1:03:25'the most unreliable car in the world got the others going as well.'

1:03:32 > 1:03:33Oh, yeah.

1:03:39 > 1:03:40Bloody hell.

1:03:40 > 1:03:42My lips are now tingling.

1:03:46 > 1:03:48I get the feeling something's gotta give soon.

1:03:52 > 1:03:53Jesus Christ, my head!

1:03:59 > 1:04:02'At 17,200 feet, we pulled over - again.'

1:04:09 > 1:04:12PANTING

1:04:22 > 1:04:23- Hammond?- Yeah.

1:04:26 > 1:04:31Even if...the cars could get over that and I seriously doubt that, I can't.

1:04:35 > 1:04:37Just pushing on's just stupid.

1:04:37 > 1:04:40- Seriously, I'm calling it a day. - I think you could be right.

1:04:50 > 1:04:55'We really were in trouble. So, we turned round and headed back down.

1:04:55 > 1:04:56'Fast.'

1:05:04 > 1:05:0616 two. Still feeling weird.

1:05:10 > 1:05:11HE COUGHS

1:05:13 > 1:05:15Breathing's better.

1:05:15 > 1:05:16With every foot...

1:05:16 > 1:05:18the engine's gonna run smoother.

1:05:18 > 1:05:21My body's gonna run smoother.

1:05:29 > 1:05:34'We then went the long way round and finally, drunk on oxygen,

1:05:34 > 1:05:37'we made it to the other side of the Andes.'

1:05:45 > 1:05:47DEEP BREATHING

1:05:49 > 1:05:52THEY INHALE NOISILY Air!

1:05:52 > 1:05:56- It's so...so underrated. - It's thick.

1:05:56 > 1:05:58It's like breathing soup.

1:05:58 > 1:06:01You can bite off pieces of it and chew it.

1:06:01 > 1:06:03It's like lung nectar.

1:06:06 > 1:06:10There is just one small thing that's occurred to me, chaps.

1:06:10 > 1:06:11What?

1:06:13 > 1:06:15Where the hell are we?

1:06:19 > 1:06:22We were in the Atacama Desert

1:06:22 > 1:06:23where there is no life at all.

1:06:23 > 1:06:26Not even on a cellular level.

1:06:26 > 1:06:31Richard Hammond was the smallest living organism for miles.

1:06:32 > 1:06:35There was nothing here at all.

1:06:35 > 1:06:38Except for one road.

1:06:40 > 1:06:41Oh, yes.

1:06:43 > 1:06:45The Pan-American Highway.

1:06:50 > 1:06:52Running is smooth.

1:06:53 > 1:06:56The view is spectacular.

1:06:56 > 1:06:58Temperature is low.

1:07:02 > 1:07:05'But the mad dash down the mountain had been too much once again

1:07:05 > 1:07:09'for the modifications on Hammond's Toyota.'

1:07:11 > 1:07:13Better stop. Oh, God.

1:07:14 > 1:07:16Didn't sound good.

1:07:17 > 1:07:20- You heard something?- Oh, yeah!

1:07:20 > 1:07:21Oh, dear.

1:07:21 > 1:07:25I think, James, we can safely say that what's happened there

1:07:25 > 1:07:27is my prop-shaft has fallen off.

1:07:27 > 1:07:30'And the prop-shaft was only half of it.'

1:07:30 > 1:07:31BLEEP.

1:07:31 > 1:07:34- What's broken?- Diff.

1:07:34 > 1:07:36- It's shattered? - Absolutely exploded.

1:07:36 > 1:07:41Good God. I'm surprised that didn't somersault the car.

1:07:42 > 1:07:46I've just heard on the radio that Richard Hammond's Land Cruiser

1:07:46 > 1:07:48is in serious trouble.

1:07:49 > 1:07:50HE SPUTTERS

1:07:53 > 1:07:57'Happily, the Top Gear orang-utan elected not to stop and help.

1:07:57 > 1:08:02'As a result, James and I quickly got the Toyota working again.'

1:08:07 > 1:08:09We reconfigured it, it's now running.

1:08:09 > 1:08:13Front wheel drive only so it's now just its front legs

1:08:13 > 1:08:16dragging itself along, still working.

1:08:17 > 1:08:22'We were now tantalisingly close to the Pacific Ocean, the finish line.'

1:08:24 > 1:08:27There can be no doubt this has been our toughest assignment ever.

1:08:29 > 1:08:32No question about that. It's nearly killed us,

1:08:32 > 1:08:34it's nearly killed our cars.

1:08:37 > 1:08:41'It is incredible to think that these cheap cars

1:08:41 > 1:08:44'bought unseen on the Internet had crossed the Amazon rainforest.

1:08:46 > 1:08:49'They'd scaled the most dangerous road in the world.

1:08:50 > 1:08:55'They'd still been working when their drivers had broken down in the Andes.

1:08:58 > 1:09:02'We didn't just respect them. We loved them.'

1:09:04 > 1:09:07I have a teddy bear, I've had it since I was born.

1:09:07 > 1:09:10One of its arms has fallen off, one of its eyes is missing,

1:09:10 > 1:09:13its head's come off more times than I can mention.

1:09:13 > 1:09:16To you it would be worthless junk.

1:09:16 > 1:09:18But to me, it means everything,

1:09:18 > 1:09:21and it's the same story with this car.

1:09:24 > 1:09:27Yeah, the ride's terrible, it's a bit noisy, doesn't handle that well,

1:09:27 > 1:09:30and I'm always worried it's going to fall over,

1:09:30 > 1:09:34but it's done everything the big boys have done, hasn't got stuck any more often,

1:09:34 > 1:09:39and the only time it's really gone wrong is due to its dunking in the river.

1:09:39 > 1:09:42I think the plucky little car's done all right.

1:09:44 > 1:09:50From the very start of the trip when I couldn't start it on the raft, I thought, "Oh, no."

1:09:50 > 1:09:52But I didn't know it then, I didn't know how determined it was.

1:09:52 > 1:09:55This thing is like that Black Knight

1:09:55 > 1:09:57in that Monty Python sketch

1:09:57 > 1:10:00where they're fighting with swords and he gets his arm cut off.

1:10:00 > 1:10:04"No, no, 'tis but a scratch!" It's a great little car.

1:10:04 > 1:10:08'As our exhausted convoy drew nearer to the coast,

1:10:09 > 1:10:13'weirdly, the road started to climb again.'

1:10:14 > 1:10:1940 miles to go and we've got to drop 2,300 feet to sea level.

1:10:19 > 1:10:22It must start going downhill in a minute!

1:10:22 > 1:10:24'But it didn't.

1:10:24 > 1:10:26'The punishing climb continued.'

1:10:27 > 1:10:30I can smell... I can smell...

1:10:30 > 1:10:32a boiling engine.

1:10:37 > 1:10:42Is the drop at the other end just sheer, because we're nearly at the Pacific now?

1:10:42 > 1:10:45And we're 4,000 feet up.

1:10:47 > 1:10:52'Soon, though, we turned off the Pan-America and headed through the dunes to the finish line,

1:10:52 > 1:10:56'where, unfortunately, there was one more obstacle in the way.

1:10:57 > 1:10:58'A big one.'

1:10:59 > 1:11:00Hang on a minute.

1:11:03 > 1:11:04Whoa, wait.

1:11:10 > 1:11:14- Look how bloody steep it is. - God above.

1:11:15 > 1:11:18I can see now why they said four wheel drive.

1:11:18 > 1:11:21- Er, I've only got three wheel drive. - I've only got two.

1:11:21 > 1:11:25- What if you dig in? - If you dug in and started to roll,

1:11:25 > 1:11:29the chances of you being alive at the bottom...are nil.

1:11:29 > 1:11:34'We therefore decided to get some practice on a smaller dune first.'

1:11:34 > 1:11:35Are we ready, chaps?

1:11:35 > 1:11:37- Ready.- Ready?- Yeah.

1:11:38 > 1:11:39Three!

1:11:39 > 1:11:41- Two!- 'Hold on, hold on.'

1:11:43 > 1:11:45Give me strength. Give me strength.

1:11:45 > 1:11:46What?

1:11:46 > 1:11:48- Just before we do this, I wanted to say...- Oh, shit.

1:11:48 > 1:11:52- No!- Oh, my BLEEP!

1:12:04 > 1:12:05My donkey!

1:12:09 > 1:12:11His wheel's come off.

1:12:11 > 1:12:12Aw!

1:12:16 > 1:12:19'Donkey was dead.

1:12:19 > 1:12:21'And in some ways, I was relieved.

1:12:21 > 1:12:25'Because it meant I no longer had to drive down that dune.'

1:12:33 > 1:12:35This is utterly, utterly, utterly stupid.

1:12:37 > 1:12:39I wouldn't do this in a brand-new Range Rover.

1:12:39 > 1:12:41James, are you ready?

1:12:42 > 1:12:45Yeah, I'll be going for second gear, Jezza.

1:12:45 > 1:12:49Second gear, low range, and I've got my diff locks in. Have you?

1:12:49 > 1:12:52- I haven't got diff locks. - 'Good luck, boys.'

1:12:52 > 1:12:57Three...two...one. Go!

1:13:07 > 1:13:08Oh, my God.

1:13:09 > 1:13:13I don't know... Oh, Christ, I don't know where the wheels are pointing.

1:13:14 > 1:13:16I don't think so.

1:13:19 > 1:13:21It's going sideways.

1:13:21 > 1:13:24Whoa. Whoo oh oh!

1:13:26 > 1:13:27Don't you dare go sideways again.

1:13:29 > 1:13:32'The soft sand was a nightmare and the gradient meant pretty soon

1:13:32 > 1:13:35'we were fighting to keep control.'

1:13:38 > 1:13:40Get in a straight line, you metal BLEEP.

1:13:40 > 1:13:41Come on!

1:13:42 > 1:13:44Come on. Oh, it's going a bit fast now.

1:13:45 > 1:13:49I'm in a 900-year-old utterly ruined Range Rover.

1:13:50 > 1:13:51Argh! Argh!

1:13:53 > 1:13:55Levelling out. It's levelling out.

1:13:56 > 1:13:57It's levelling out.

1:14:01 > 1:14:03Argh! We're down!

1:14:05 > 1:14:07We're down!

1:14:08 > 1:14:10Yeah!

1:14:11 > 1:14:16'Once again, we had shown what the car, even when it's an old croc, is capable of.

1:14:16 > 1:14:19'Well, two of us had.

1:14:28 > 1:14:31'But when we finally regrouped by the water's edge,

1:14:31 > 1:14:35'Hammond still believed he'd chosen wisely.'

1:14:35 > 1:14:40- Are you going to try and argue...? - It's extraordinarily good. It's led a very hard life.

1:14:40 > 1:14:43It died a noble death, I think valiant.

1:14:43 > 1:14:47I think rubbish. It has been a constant source of problems and delays.

1:14:47 > 1:14:52It was old and arthritic and had been beaten every day of its life, sick old donkey.

1:14:52 > 1:14:55These two were old and arthritic but they are here,

1:14:55 > 1:14:59and the Land Cruiser is 2,800 feet above us up there.

1:14:59 > 1:15:02Forever. Can I just make the case for the Suzuki

1:15:02 > 1:15:05cos I know what you're thinking? Plucky little car.

1:15:05 > 1:15:11- Helped you out a few times. - I agree.- Technically, never really broke down.- Well...

1:15:11 > 1:15:14It didn't survive very well in the puddle.

1:15:14 > 1:15:16But I'd like to say most importantly...

1:15:16 > 1:15:19- Mm-hm.- ..the ride is rotten.

1:15:19 > 1:15:20Yes. And because of that,

1:15:20 > 1:15:24because it's almost ruined your spine,

1:15:24 > 1:15:26and because yours isn't here,

1:15:26 > 1:15:29we have a startling conclusion to the show.

1:15:29 > 1:15:33It turns out that the most unreliable car in the world...

1:15:33 > 1:15:36is the most reliable car in the world.

1:15:36 > 1:15:37Yeah. It's fair enough.

1:15:37 > 1:15:41Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Range Rover.

1:15:41 > 1:15:44- Not what I'd ever expected it... - Nobody expected that.

1:15:44 > 1:15:48- Come on, we can be proud of that. - Proud to be British...

1:16:01 > 1:16:04Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

1:16:04 > 1:16:07E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk