Episode 1

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0:00:16 > 0:00:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:00:19 > 0:00:22Thank you so much. Hello!

0:00:22 > 0:00:26Hello and welcome. Thank you, everybody. Thank you.

0:00:26 > 0:00:30Now, even though this programme has taken a terrible battering

0:00:30 > 0:00:33in the newspapers in recent weeks,

0:00:33 > 0:00:38we have made every effort we possibly can to make sure this series is unaffected.

0:00:38 > 0:00:42- SCATTERED APPLAUSE - Thank you. Thank you, really.

0:00:42 > 0:00:44Thanks very much.

0:00:44 > 0:00:47So, coming up now is a montage of what you can expect

0:00:47 > 0:00:49over the next seven weeks.

0:00:54 > 0:00:5757 miles to the gallon!

0:00:57 > 0:01:00So, spacious...and economical.

0:01:00 > 0:01:03Going through the first corner...

0:01:03 > 0:01:06And THAT is how a camshaft works.

0:01:08 > 0:01:10Mate!

0:01:11 > 0:01:15No-o-o! There's been a bit of a mistake.

0:01:15 > 0:01:20THAT is the tape we sent to the newspapers in the hope they'd be fooled into thinking

0:01:20 > 0:01:24that's what we'll be doing. What we're actually doing is THIS!

0:01:27 > 0:01:31- Oh, no! That's not what I wanted to see in the mirror! - Heading to the side...

0:01:31 > 0:01:33ENGINE ROARS

0:01:35 > 0:01:38There he is! There he is!

0:01:39 > 0:01:41Turning left into Acacia Avenue.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44Over there. Over there. Go over there!

0:01:45 > 0:01:48Buffeting! Buffeting!

0:01:48 > 0:01:50He's The Stig's Chinese cousin.

0:01:59 > 0:02:01Hold onto your spine.

0:02:01 > 0:02:04- GROANING - Johnson makes a good start.

0:02:07 > 0:02:10Come on, you little bugger!

0:02:10 > 0:02:12Man alive! Are we getting some shots here?!

0:02:12 > 0:02:14Thank you. Just browsing.

0:02:19 > 0:02:22Stretch it, stretch it, stretch it! Come on!

0:02:22 > 0:02:23- HE CHUCKLES - Ow!

0:02:26 > 0:02:28How's that possible?

0:02:32 > 0:02:35- Oh...- That was beautiful.

0:02:40 > 0:02:45All of that is to come, but we kick off tonight with this.

0:02:45 > 0:02:48Yes, because this is important.

0:02:48 > 0:02:51Let's say you want a mid-engine supercar but, for some reason,

0:02:51 > 0:02:54you don't want a Ferrari 458.

0:02:54 > 0:02:56What is best for you?

0:02:56 > 0:03:01Now, naturally, of course, us three could not agree on a solution on this,

0:03:01 > 0:03:07so the producer said we had to settle our differences with a road trip across Italy.

0:03:11 > 0:03:17'The meeting point was the beautiful town of Lecce, in the heel of Italy,

0:03:17 > 0:03:19'and I was the first to arrive.'

0:03:21 > 0:03:24This is the McLaren MP4-12C.

0:03:26 > 0:03:32It's a car made with an almost psychotic attention to detail.

0:03:32 > 0:03:35It's very technical. It's why, I think, it probably suits me quite well.

0:03:35 > 0:03:42- ENGINE ROARS - Then Jeremy arrived in a car that suits HIM quite well.

0:03:44 > 0:03:47- Morning, shrinking violet. - JEREMY LAUGHS

0:03:47 > 0:03:48This...

0:03:48 > 0:03:51HE COUGHS AND SPLUTTERS

0:03:51 > 0:03:53..is a Lamborghini Aventador.

0:03:55 > 0:04:01What I love most of all about this is that Audi did all the boring engine and wiring bits

0:04:01 > 0:04:06and then let Lamborghini go mad with the styling.

0:04:06 > 0:04:10It looks better than yours and, therefore, it IS better.

0:04:10 > 0:04:14I agree. As a poster, as Lamborghinis always have been, it is superb.

0:04:14 > 0:04:15It looks great.

0:04:15 > 0:04:18- But it's a bit of a dinosaur, to be honest.- It is.- It is.

0:04:18 > 0:04:22- It's too big, it's too wide. - I'm sorry?! This, you just know...

0:04:22 > 0:04:25All they ever talked about was G. They were sitting going,

0:04:25 > 0:04:29"How can we make it go round a corner a little bit faster?"

0:04:29 > 0:04:34- It's a supercar.- "So give it guns! Let's give it guns! Space rockets!"

0:04:34 > 0:04:39This - they will have had seven years of meetings to get to that windscreen wiper.

0:04:39 > 0:04:45- So it works properly. What's wrong with that?- Lamborghini would've said, "Why don't we use a laser?

0:04:45 > 0:04:48"Why don't we have lasers shooting heat onto the windscreen to...?"

0:04:48 > 0:04:52- That's why I love Lambos. They're mental.- Have you had a lot of pop today?

0:04:52 > 0:04:57- 'At that moment, Hammond arrived, in a Noble M600.'- Oh, yeah.

0:04:57 > 0:05:01- So, Hammond...- Morning. - Let's just get this straight.

0:05:01 > 0:05:04You think there are people in the world who are going to say,

0:05:04 > 0:05:09"No, I don't want something Italian and exotic. Don't want a Ferrari.

0:05:09 > 0:05:14- "I want something built on a light industrial unit in Leicestershire"? - No, because...

0:05:14 > 0:05:19No, wait a minute. Sorry. You buy this, I think, because it's got the engine from a Volvo XC90.

0:05:19 > 0:05:24No! Yes, the engine may be from a Volvo, but it's made by Yamaha.

0:05:24 > 0:05:29It's twin-engine, it's absolutely magnificent, and this car, above everything else, is light.

0:05:29 > 0:05:33Comparing these - it's like comparing me with you.

0:05:33 > 0:05:38The power-to-weight ratio is insane. 541 brake horsepower per tonne in there.

0:05:38 > 0:05:42That's Bugatti Veyron territory, and you know it!

0:05:42 > 0:05:47This is going to crush you guys like beetles under its feet.

0:05:47 > 0:05:51Soon, our cars started to draw a bit of a crowd...

0:05:52 > 0:05:58..so the producer said we should leave the town and go for a little drive in the country.

0:05:59 > 0:06:02Bloody hellfire!

0:06:04 > 0:06:06HE CHUCKLES

0:06:08 > 0:06:10Quite good.

0:06:13 > 0:06:17You are probably sitting there, thinking, "Hold on! Why would I spend £228,000

0:06:17 > 0:06:22"on a car with no airbags or anti-lock brakes, made in Leicester?"

0:06:22 > 0:06:25But that's missing the point.

0:06:25 > 0:06:28If I were to ask those two what the best supercar ever made is,

0:06:28 > 0:06:30I know what they'd answer.

0:06:30 > 0:06:31Ferrari F40.

0:06:31 > 0:06:36There's something of the Ferrari F40 about this.

0:06:36 > 0:06:40Something to do with the way it rides on the road, the way it feels.

0:06:40 > 0:06:42The simplicity of it.

0:06:44 > 0:06:48I buy the argument for a flamboyant supercar. I get it.

0:06:48 > 0:06:50But maybe there is another way of doing it.

0:06:50 > 0:06:55There's a sort of joy in things that simply work really well, like this gearbox.

0:06:55 > 0:06:59It's sort of like a two-stage trigger on a sniping rifle -

0:06:59 > 0:07:03you can preload it with half a ball...and then change.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06It's very satisfying.

0:07:06 > 0:07:12Maybe really anal attention to detail will have a charm of its own. Let's see.

0:07:12 > 0:07:17James and Richard can make as many arguments as they want, but the fact is this.

0:07:17 > 0:07:21They're driving about in Virgin Cola.

0:07:21 > 0:07:24It's not the real thing. This is the real thing.

0:07:24 > 0:07:29Lamborghini invented the supercar with the Miura,

0:07:29 > 0:07:33the world's first mid-engine speed and dream machine.

0:07:33 > 0:07:36I mean, yes, this is the most expensive car here.

0:07:36 > 0:07:40A quarter of a million pounds. But who cares? It's a dream car.

0:07:40 > 0:07:45You don't dream about going to Filey or Bridlington. You dream about going to Tahiti.

0:07:46 > 0:07:49Actually, Tahiti's terrible. I went there once.

0:07:49 > 0:07:51It was full of Americans looking at dolphins.

0:07:55 > 0:07:58'Half an hour later, we were told to brim the tanks in our cars

0:07:58 > 0:08:03'and pay careful attention to the challenge we were about to receive.'

0:08:03 > 0:08:08Hang on a minute. "You will now see which of your cars can achieve the highest speed."

0:08:08 > 0:08:11That'll be mine. It's as simple as that.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13It's the fastest.

0:08:13 > 0:08:17- "How fast your car can go is not relevant."- It sort of is.

0:08:17 > 0:08:19"It's how fast you dare drive it."

0:08:19 > 0:08:23'The location for this challenge was the Nardo test track,

0:08:23 > 0:08:30'a banked eight-mile circle of tarmac so vast it can be seen clearly from space.

0:08:32 > 0:08:38'No car can achieve its true top speed here because it's one endless corner.

0:08:38 > 0:08:43'But it is one of only two or three places in the world where they can get close.

0:08:46 > 0:08:51'Lamborghini and McLaren had both sent technicians to make sure their cars,

0:08:51 > 0:08:56'and especially the tyres, could handle the vast heat of constant high-speed cornering.

0:08:58 > 0:09:01'But as for Richard and his car from Leicester...'

0:09:01 > 0:09:04- Do Noble not have a workshop here? - Not a workshop, no.

0:09:04 > 0:09:08I suppose if we were doing this at Mallory Park, they'd send Geoff over(!)

0:09:08 > 0:09:12I've done it. It's all right. All four tyres are the same makes.

0:09:12 > 0:09:15That there's air in 'em.

0:09:15 > 0:09:19'James and I were feeling fairly confident...

0:09:19 > 0:09:22'until we started chatting to a man called Max Venturi,

0:09:22 > 0:09:25'who is one of Lambo's test drivers.'

0:09:25 > 0:09:29We do a lot of testing here but we don't do too much the top speed,

0:09:29 > 0:09:31because it is very bumpy.

0:09:31 > 0:09:36You...you could jump from one lane to the other lane,

0:09:36 > 0:09:37- so is...- That sounds bad.

0:09:37 > 0:09:41And also, today, it is windy,

0:09:41 > 0:09:46- so you need to take care about the wind, as well. - What, do we need to tack(?)

0:09:48 > 0:09:51'Because speedometers are never absolutely accurate,

0:09:51 > 0:09:55'the producers fitted each of our cars with hi-tech telemetry

0:09:55 > 0:09:58'so they could see how fast we were really going.

0:09:58 > 0:10:03'And then we were sent on to the track for a sighting lap.'

0:10:10 > 0:10:12I have the most to lose here.

0:10:12 > 0:10:16My car is the fastest - top speed 225mph.

0:10:16 > 0:10:22Jeremy's Lambo - 217, James's McLaren 205mph,

0:10:22 > 0:10:25or to put it another way, a walking race.

0:10:25 > 0:10:30Now, I have 691 brake horsepower at my disposal.

0:10:30 > 0:10:33That's almost 100 more than James has.

0:10:33 > 0:10:36And it's proper horsepower.

0:10:36 > 0:10:38Blue-blooded, real horsepower.

0:10:38 > 0:10:40Thanks to emission regulations,

0:10:40 > 0:10:44this is probably the last V12 engine that will ever be made.

0:10:44 > 0:10:47From now on, they'll have to be smaller and turbo charged,

0:10:47 > 0:10:51like they are in the Noble and the McLaren.

0:10:51 > 0:10:55Yes, my engine is the smallest. It's a 3.8-litre V8,

0:10:55 > 0:11:00but it has the highest specific output, that is, of all the engines here,

0:11:00 > 0:11:02it produces the most BHP per litre,

0:11:02 > 0:11:06because it's been intelligently designed by engineers in Woking,

0:11:06 > 0:11:10not just put together to impress yahoos.

0:11:11 > 0:11:15Those two keep banging on about, "This has got the engine out of a Volvo XC90."

0:11:15 > 0:11:19Yes, well, OK, but let's not forget, Yamaha make it,

0:11:19 > 0:11:23and they produce some pretty amazing motorcycle engines,

0:11:23 > 0:11:28and Noble have then strapped two turbos to it, so it makes 650 brake horsepower.

0:11:28 > 0:11:30I say that, but I can change that.

0:11:30 > 0:11:35With this button down here, I can have 450 for road, 550 for track,

0:11:35 > 0:11:39or 650 for race. I'm going to have the full 650, I think, today.

0:11:39 > 0:11:43I do have quite a lot of respect for the Midget doing this, because...

0:11:43 > 0:11:48Well, the last time he tried to go fast on a test track, it didn't go well.

0:11:48 > 0:11:50With the sighting lap over,

0:11:50 > 0:11:55we were told to put some distance between ourselves and go for it.

0:12:01 > 0:12:03I'm moving up into the outside lane.

0:12:08 > 0:12:10It's 250kph.

0:12:12 > 0:12:15Now we're in 6th speed...

0:12:15 > 0:12:17Moving up a little bit...

0:12:19 > 0:12:23It does feel a bit wobbly. I don't like it.

0:12:24 > 0:12:25270...

0:12:26 > 0:12:29My God, this surface is shocking!

0:12:29 > 0:12:32There's the wind! There's the wobble!

0:12:32 > 0:12:34There's the jump!

0:12:34 > 0:12:36Ooh, God!

0:12:36 > 0:12:41See, that is 280, and my heart's really starting to beat now. 290...

0:12:41 > 0:12:44'Max from Lamborghini had warned all of us

0:12:44 > 0:12:48'that it would be too dangerous to exceed 300km per hour.

0:12:48 > 0:12:51'And all of us chose to ignore him.'

0:12:52 > 0:12:54My foot is hard down now.

0:12:58 > 0:13:00300 and... Oh, crikey! Moses.

0:13:00 > 0:13:02I'd a lift there. Bit of a panic.

0:13:04 > 0:13:09300km per hour indicated. I can feel the car jumping.

0:13:09 > 0:13:12Buffeting! Buffeting!

0:13:12 > 0:13:15There's a scare? Whoa-ho-ho!

0:13:15 > 0:13:18340...360...

0:13:18 > 0:13:23And every fibre of my being wants me to lift off!

0:13:24 > 0:13:27Oh, God Almighty!

0:13:27 > 0:13:29God knows what those tyres are going through.

0:13:31 > 0:13:34God, it's hypnotic.

0:13:34 > 0:13:36Don't look at the line, don't look at the line.

0:13:38 > 0:13:40Come on!

0:13:40 > 0:13:42Please, just another ten!

0:13:42 > 0:13:44326 indicated!

0:13:44 > 0:13:46327 indicated.

0:13:47 > 0:13:51329 indicated! Come on - 330!

0:13:51 > 0:13:53331.

0:13:53 > 0:13:57Come on, give me a bit more than 330!

0:13:57 > 0:13:58Just give me a bit more!

0:13:58 > 0:14:00A bit more!

0:14:00 > 0:14:02- This is- BLEEP- quick!

0:14:02 > 0:14:05HIGH-PITCHED WHINE DROWNS OUT SPEECH

0:14:10 > 0:14:13WHINE STOPS I'm backing out of this.

0:14:15 > 0:14:16That is...

0:14:16 > 0:14:18Ahh!

0:14:19 > 0:14:22..pretty bloody alarming.

0:14:23 > 0:14:27'With the test over, it was now time to find out which one of us

0:14:27 > 0:14:30'had the biggest testes.'

0:14:30 > 0:14:33- The top speed of your car is 225mph. - Yes.

0:14:33 > 0:14:38You achieved 204.8.

0:14:38 > 0:14:39Ow!

0:14:39 > 0:14:43- Who have you got? - I've got James's.- James's?- Yes.

0:14:43 > 0:14:47- In the slowest car, in the slowest car.- 200...- Oh!

0:14:47 > 0:14:49..and 1.6.

0:14:50 > 0:14:54217mph IS the top speed of the Lamborghini.

0:14:54 > 0:14:55You did it at

0:14:55 > 0:15:01- 204.3.- Oh, God.

0:15:01 > 0:15:04- No!- Yes! RICHARD LAUGHS

0:15:04 > 0:15:05No!

0:15:10 > 0:15:11Ahh.

0:15:14 > 0:15:16Ohh!

0:15:16 > 0:15:20Right, we will, of course be picking that up again later on.

0:15:20 > 0:15:24- Can I just say, half a mile an hour? That's all there was in it between you and me.- Yeah.

0:15:24 > 0:15:30- If I'd just kept my foot down... - Yeah. But you lost!

0:15:30 > 0:15:35- Hold on a minute. Hold on. I think you'll find you both lost. - How did you work that out?

0:15:35 > 0:15:39Because I got closest to the theoretical top speed of my car,

0:15:39 > 0:15:42- and therefore I have the biggest testes.- No!

0:15:42 > 0:15:46The challenge was to see who could drive the fastest, and I did.

0:15:46 > 0:15:50Then we refilled the cars, we brimmed them, to see which had used the least fuel doing it,

0:15:50 > 0:15:54and guess what?! Well, the Lambo did 7mpg,

0:15:54 > 0:15:58the McLaren did 8mpg and the Noble did 9!

0:15:58 > 0:16:01So the Noble wins AGAIN! I know!

0:16:01 > 0:16:04- Just stop it!- Let's just... No, no, no.- OK.

0:16:04 > 0:16:09Let's just...just to work out where we are, so that's two challenges so far,

0:16:09 > 0:16:13two wins for the Noble, and for the Lambo...

0:16:13 > 0:16:17- Now, let's see.- Let's not see. Let's do the news.- All right.

0:16:17 > 0:16:21Actually, before that, those of you who saw our Christmas special

0:16:21 > 0:16:24will remember we left our three cars on plinths high in the Himalayas

0:16:24 > 0:16:27on a road between China and India,

0:16:27 > 0:16:32so that people passing between these two great economic superpowers

0:16:32 > 0:16:35would forevermore be reminded of Great Britain.

0:16:35 > 0:16:36Well, unfortunately,

0:16:36 > 0:16:41it turns out that the plinths were built on

0:16:41 > 0:16:43an ancient burial ground

0:16:43 > 0:16:45with deep religious significance,

0:16:45 > 0:16:48so a man came and told us to take them down immediately.

0:16:48 > 0:16:51- Yeah.- So we did. - Where are the cars now?

0:16:51 > 0:16:54- They're not in the Himalayas. - But where are they?

0:16:54 > 0:17:00- Hampshire.- Really?- Yes. That's where it is. Anyway, the news.

0:17:00 > 0:17:07There was a man in the papers this week who has failed his driving theory test 92 times.

0:17:07 > 0:17:13- 92?!- I don't want to be rude, but he must be an idiot...

0:17:13 > 0:17:16- I mean, 92...- Interestingly, you say that.

0:17:16 > 0:17:19- Have you seen the theory test? - I didn't have to do one.

0:17:19 > 0:17:24- Has anyone here seen the theory test? Anybody?- Yeah.- You have?

0:17:24 > 0:17:26Because most people of our age haven't,

0:17:26 > 0:17:30and none of the questions have anything to do - as far as I can work out - with driving.

0:17:30 > 0:17:33Can I give you some examples? You can answer this.

0:17:33 > 0:17:35"An elderly person...

0:17:35 > 0:17:41"An elderly person's ability could be affected because they may be unable to...?"

0:17:41 > 0:17:44- Eat toffees.- No.

0:17:44 > 0:17:46Get an erection.

0:17:46 > 0:17:47LAUGHTER

0:17:47 > 0:17:49Wear jeans!

0:17:49 > 0:17:54Funny(!) "Where's the safest place to park your vehicle at night?"

0:17:54 > 0:17:56In a police station.

0:17:56 > 0:18:01Right, we've got a picture here. Bring up this picture. Right.

0:18:01 > 0:18:03This is a real question, OK?

0:18:03 > 0:18:06"You must not stop on these road markings

0:18:06 > 0:18:09"because you may obstruct...what?"

0:18:10 > 0:18:14- Landing aircraft(!)- I mean, seriously, that is a question.

0:18:14 > 0:18:19- He's managed to fail 92 times on that one.- Those are not questions to pass your driving...

0:18:19 > 0:18:22- Do any of them say, for instance, can you drive a car(?)- No, no.

0:18:22 > 0:18:27I'm in the book now. This is what you buy your teenage child when they're learning to drive.

0:18:27 > 0:18:32"At an incident, a small child is not breathing.

0:18:32 > 0:18:36"To restore normal breathing, you should breathe into their mouth, A sharply, B gently,

0:18:36 > 0:18:39"C heavily, D tenderly?"

0:18:39 > 0:18:41It doesn't say "tenderly"!

0:18:41 > 0:18:45- I made "tenderly" up. - Nothing to do with driving! - That's enough driving test rubbish.

0:18:45 > 0:18:48We'll have to move it on, or we'll be here all day.

0:18:48 > 0:18:51Let's talk about cars again, because the mighty Alfa Romeo,

0:18:51 > 0:18:53they are reduced now, to a full range of cars,

0:18:53 > 0:18:57- they make two. Two cars. - Really? What, the Mito and...

0:18:57 > 0:19:02- The Giulietta and the Mito.- They don't make the 159 any more? - No, two Alfa Romeos on the market,

0:19:02 > 0:19:05but that's about to change as they have just announced this, the 4C.

0:19:05 > 0:19:09I know. It's tiny, it's a small, lightweight sports car.

0:19:09 > 0:19:12Very lightweight. Carbon fibre, all sorts of clever technical stuff.

0:19:12 > 0:19:15Mid-engined - it's only a 1750CC engine, but it's turbo charged,

0:19:15 > 0:19:19so it will be quick, because it's so light. It looks fantastic!

0:19:19 > 0:19:22It's wrong, is what it is. What Alfa Romeo should make

0:19:22 > 0:19:24is a small convertible two-seater,

0:19:24 > 0:19:27engine at the front, rear-wheel drive.

0:19:27 > 0:19:30- They could call it, I don't know, the...- Spider? - Spider's a great name.

0:19:30 > 0:19:34And maybe they could get Dustin Hoffman to appear in a film with it,

0:19:34 > 0:19:38- to etch it into the world's consciousness.- They could, they could live in the past.

0:19:38 > 0:19:43- Or they could make something modern and forward-looking, like that.- No, rubbish!

0:19:43 > 0:19:47What if you two had been at Alfa Romeo when they came up with the original Spider?

0:19:47 > 0:19:49"That's no good! Where's the horse in front of it?

0:19:49 > 0:19:53- "It's not wood. That'll never work." - It's not modern. It won't work.

0:19:53 > 0:19:57Make it go away. I've got something more important to talk about.

0:19:57 > 0:20:02- A new Maserati.- Really(?)- OK. This is the new Maserati 4x4, OK?

0:20:02 > 0:20:06I think it looks fantastic but there are some odd things about it.

0:20:06 > 0:20:12Maserati say that, unlike any other big 4x4, it has a luxury atmosphere.

0:20:12 > 0:20:15Cos every time I get in a Range Rover, I always think, "Oh, no!

0:20:15 > 0:20:18"I've accidentally got into a cowshed."

0:20:18 > 0:20:20And then they say,

0:20:20 > 0:20:23"There are no off-roaders that give a sporty feel."

0:20:23 > 0:20:28- What about the Porsche Cayenne? Or the Mercedes ML63?- BMW X5?

0:20:28 > 0:20:30All of those?

0:20:30 > 0:20:35I think Maserati...they're the sort of company that go, "We've invented a new type of watch.

0:20:35 > 0:20:39"What makes it really good is, you can wear it on your wrist!"

0:20:39 > 0:20:44This is quite awkward, because somebody'll have to tell them, "Hey, Maserati, it's been done!"

0:20:44 > 0:20:50What I love about this, though, is it's called the Kubang, which, being a Maserati,

0:20:50 > 0:20:54is the noise it'll make the day the warranty runs out!

0:20:54 > 0:20:58Right, that is the end of the news, so let's get back to the action.

0:20:58 > 0:21:01Tonight, for those of you with very short memories,

0:21:01 > 0:21:04we are trying to answer an important question -

0:21:04 > 0:21:09which is the best mid-engined supercar if you don't want a Ferrari 458?

0:21:09 > 0:21:12James says it's the McLaren MP4-12C.

0:21:12 > 0:21:15I say it's the Lamborghini Aventador,

0:21:15 > 0:21:18and Richard says it's the Noble M600.

0:21:18 > 0:21:21Yes, and so far, I'm being proved right.

0:21:21 > 0:21:23It achieved the highest top speed and is the most economical.

0:21:23 > 0:21:26But having tested those sort of things,

0:21:26 > 0:21:30we were then told to leave the test track and drive north to Rome.

0:21:30 > 0:21:34So, three supercars, lovely weather, drive across Italy,

0:21:34 > 0:21:36what could possibly go wrong(?)

0:21:39 > 0:21:44'Certainly, as the day began, the rather smug Hammond was very happy,

0:21:44 > 0:21:46'making up his own little games.'

0:21:46 > 0:21:49I'm going to make some more turbo noise. It is addictive.

0:21:49 > 0:21:54Put the foot down and then lift off. Ooh!

0:21:55 > 0:21:58Turbo noises are sort of for children. You do know that?

0:21:58 > 0:22:03- Right, I'm going to come alongside and give you a turbo noise. Drop your window.- God...

0:22:03 > 0:22:07Three, two, one. ENGINE ROARS

0:22:10 > 0:22:15This is like indulging a six-year-old child who's learned a simple card trick.

0:22:17 > 0:22:18GEARS CRUNCH

0:22:18 > 0:22:20- Oh,- BLEEP!

0:22:22 > 0:22:25CLATTERING AND CRUNCHING

0:22:25 > 0:22:30I hate to say this, but I believe I have clutch or gearbox issues.

0:22:30 > 0:22:32Oh, dear.

0:22:34 > 0:22:38I can't understand it myself, cos you know when you see the legend "made in Leicester"...

0:22:38 > 0:22:42- It's a byword for reliability and quality.- Absolutely.

0:22:42 > 0:22:45So what are the other things that are made in Leicester?

0:22:45 > 0:22:51- Leicestershire cheese?- They make pork pies nearby, don't they?- Yeah. Pork pies are always reliable(!)

0:22:51 > 0:22:56- Have you tried pumping the clutch, to see if...?- Well, no, because the linkage is to cock as well.

0:22:56 > 0:22:59'Clearly, the Noble wasn't going anywhere.'

0:22:59 > 0:23:02Let me just think a minute. Sorry.

0:23:02 > 0:23:05When something goes wrong with my car,

0:23:05 > 0:23:07Richard Hammond always...helps you.

0:23:07 > 0:23:11No, the opposite of that. No, he just gets in his car and drives off.

0:23:11 > 0:23:14- You're right.- Yes.- Let's do that. - Goodbye.- Goodbye.

0:23:16 > 0:23:20'We were leaving Hammond 200 miles away from Rome,

0:23:20 > 0:23:23'and that made us feel quite sorry for him.'

0:23:23 > 0:23:25HE GUFFAWS

0:23:25 > 0:23:28For two months, he's been looking forward to driving his Noble

0:23:28 > 0:23:31right across Italy, and he's only gone 30 miles!

0:23:36 > 0:23:40'As our cars ate up the miles, we got to know them better.'

0:23:42 > 0:23:45Bloody hell, it's good, this. It really is good.

0:23:45 > 0:23:48It's very clever. It's active, this car.

0:23:48 > 0:23:51It doesn't have big metal anti-roll bars, or anything like that.

0:23:51 > 0:23:55Everything is controlled by its brain. It works out what each wheel is doing.

0:23:55 > 0:23:58It can even brake an individual wheel as you corner.

0:23:58 > 0:24:03In the olden days, supercars were very, very hard to drive,

0:24:03 > 0:24:06and the hardest of them all were the big Lambos.

0:24:06 > 0:24:11Changing gear in a Countach or a Diablo, you needed two hands.

0:24:11 > 0:24:15This, though, it feels like a Golf. I mean, I'm doing, what,

0:24:15 > 0:24:2080mph now, and it's almost completely silent.

0:24:20 > 0:24:23I can see where I'm going. I can see roughly where I've been.

0:24:23 > 0:24:26I think it's important to stress at this point,

0:24:26 > 0:24:29every single thing about this car is new.

0:24:29 > 0:24:33Body, interior, engine, suspension. Everything.

0:24:34 > 0:24:36It's brand new, and it feels it.

0:24:39 > 0:24:42'Meanwhile, after a two-and-a-half-hour wait,

0:24:42 > 0:24:45'my knight in shining armour finally arrived.'

0:24:55 > 0:24:57Hi!

0:24:57 > 0:25:00MAN SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

0:25:01 > 0:25:02Hi...

0:25:02 > 0:25:05This is the car.

0:25:05 > 0:25:06Yeah!

0:25:06 > 0:25:08Please talk to me.

0:25:09 > 0:25:14Please just say hello, or just... Or see me, even.

0:25:16 > 0:25:19Ah, now, there's a big tunnel coming up here.

0:25:19 > 0:25:23The irresponsible thing to do would be to turn the power train into the track mode

0:25:23 > 0:25:29and change down unnecessarily. Three, two, one, go!

0:25:29 > 0:25:32ENGINE ROARS AND ECHOES

0:25:34 > 0:25:36Oh, what a sound!

0:25:39 > 0:25:40HE CHUCKLES

0:25:40 > 0:25:46'James's car made a great noise, but mine was making fire!'

0:25:53 > 0:25:55Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

0:25:59 > 0:26:02It's a shame Hammond isn't here to enjoy the moment.

0:26:03 > 0:26:05MAN SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

0:26:07 > 0:26:09Right...

0:26:10 > 0:26:13Does he need that many words?

0:26:16 > 0:26:17Oh, God.

0:26:21 > 0:26:25The thing coming off the bottom of his phone is actually a wire...

0:26:25 > 0:26:28into his jacket, and then that's ALL batteries.

0:26:35 > 0:26:37HE SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

0:26:37 > 0:26:40Yeah! Ohh...

0:26:40 > 0:26:41Um...erm... Um...

0:26:43 > 0:26:45Right, um...

0:26:54 > 0:26:57Oh, back to six! Ha-ha!

0:26:57 > 0:27:01'Our day, meanwhile, was just getting better and better.'

0:27:01 > 0:27:03HE CHUCKLES

0:27:06 > 0:27:10- That's not a bad view, is it? - Marvellous.

0:27:11 > 0:27:15It's just suddenly hit me, that I'm driving across Italy in a supercar,

0:27:15 > 0:27:18and I've got another one to look at!

0:27:27 > 0:27:29- Buonasera!- Buonasera!

0:27:31 > 0:27:34MAN SPEAKS IN ITALIAN Oh, yeah... No idea.

0:27:34 > 0:27:37- Parlate Italiano?- No.

0:27:37 > 0:27:40- Inglese?- No!- French?- No.

0:27:40 > 0:27:45Oh, no, he's going on the phone. Oh, no. Oh, no...

0:27:45 > 0:27:48HE SPEAKS IN ITALIAN Well, that's that, then.

0:27:48 > 0:27:50'Still, could be worse...'

0:27:50 > 0:27:53SIREN BLARES

0:27:54 > 0:27:56Oh, dear.

0:27:59 > 0:28:00Prepare to look at shoes.

0:28:00 > 0:28:05This is my special face, reserved for continental policemen.

0:28:15 > 0:28:18- OK?- OK! Yeah.

0:28:21 > 0:28:26Still, it is under four hours to Rome. Just.

0:28:26 > 0:28:29TRANSLATION:

0:28:31 > 0:28:32POLICEMAN SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

0:28:32 > 0:28:36The only problem for them is because today is holiday in Italy.

0:28:36 > 0:28:41Interestingly, their only real concern is that we appear to be working on a Sunday.

0:28:41 > 0:28:43We need a permit for that.

0:28:43 > 0:28:46That's why Italy's nearly bankrupt.

0:28:47 > 0:28:50'Eventually, they told us we had to stop working,

0:28:50 > 0:28:54'so we went into Rome for a lovely dinner.'

0:29:01 > 0:29:03Somebody's farted.

0:29:06 > 0:29:10'The next day, in a workshop on the outskirts of Rome,

0:29:10 > 0:29:13'I found out just what had gone wrong with my Noble.'

0:29:13 > 0:29:20This is the clutch assembly...and this is the plate and, yeah,

0:29:20 > 0:29:23that's pretty clearly the component that failed.

0:29:23 > 0:29:26Once that broke, that came away, which is not supposed to happen.

0:29:26 > 0:29:30The thing is, this is easily replaceable. Noble don't make these.

0:29:30 > 0:29:33They're bought in - it's a clutch - but the problem now is,

0:29:33 > 0:29:36because that was whizzing around inside here,

0:29:36 > 0:29:41that's damaged bearings and shafts and all sorts of things. What's it done to the gearbox?

0:29:42 > 0:29:47'James and I decided the best way we could help Hammond was to go for lunch,

0:29:47 > 0:29:51'and since it was a Monday and we were allowed to do a bit of work,

0:29:51 > 0:29:56'we thought we'd find out which of our cars was best in traffic by racing to the restaurant.

0:29:56 > 0:29:59'Last one there would pay the bill!'

0:29:59 > 0:30:02Right, let the race begin.

0:30:03 > 0:30:06'Immediately, it was advantage Lambo,

0:30:06 > 0:30:09'because the Aventador has sat-nav...'

0:30:09 > 0:30:12- 'Your route is being calculated.' - Thank you.

0:30:12 > 0:30:16'..whereas, on the McLaren, it's an option...that hadn't been fitted.'

0:30:19 > 0:30:20Argh!

0:30:20 > 0:30:22Bollocks!

0:30:22 > 0:30:25I'll come back to that.

0:30:25 > 0:30:27'However, I did have some issues.'

0:30:27 > 0:30:30- HORNS BEEP - The first problem is width.

0:30:30 > 0:30:33It's five centimetres wider than a Range Rover.

0:30:33 > 0:30:38It's very nearly as wide, in fact, as a London bus,

0:30:38 > 0:30:43but the biggest problem of them all is the gearbox.

0:30:43 > 0:30:45Flappy paddle boxes work OK on a track,

0:30:45 > 0:30:48they work OK on the open road, but in town,

0:30:48 > 0:30:51all of them are useless.

0:30:51 > 0:30:54It's uh-uh-uh-uh-uh, jerking along, and then,

0:30:54 > 0:30:57when you want to exploit a gap, it's dim-witted and slow.

0:30:57 > 0:31:03'This was especially bad in a city where there are 117 road accidents every DAY.'

0:31:03 > 0:31:08Haven't actually seen one car yet that isn't dented.

0:31:08 > 0:31:09Look at that one there.

0:31:09 > 0:31:14A red light, but that actually doesn't mean stop. Not in Italy.

0:31:14 > 0:31:18It means, "We're trying a red light. In a minute, we'll try a green one."

0:31:18 > 0:31:21It's not relevant to the actual traffic flow.

0:31:25 > 0:31:28What happened to that?! Oh, dear.

0:31:28 > 0:31:32What we're now going to do, and this is quite cool, really,

0:31:32 > 0:31:37is turn onto the Via Appia, the ancient Roman road,

0:31:37 > 0:31:43and the suspension, with its no anti-roll bars and its intelligent computer, is doing quite well.

0:31:43 > 0:31:45Excellently, in fact.

0:31:45 > 0:31:50Why is nobody using that middle bit? Yes! That's the ticket!

0:31:52 > 0:31:56Ah, now, you see, I didn't actually think it would get quite THAT Roman.

0:32:00 > 0:32:02- CRUNCH! - Erm...

0:32:02 > 0:32:06I'm going to by overtaken by a Smart car!

0:32:07 > 0:32:11'By this stage, I'd worked out why no-one was using the middle bit. '

0:32:11 > 0:32:14TRAM BELL RINGS

0:32:14 > 0:32:16I've got myself on a railway line.

0:32:17 > 0:32:20Now what am I going to do?

0:32:20 > 0:32:25Sorry. Yeah, now I'm basically going down a... Yes.

0:32:25 > 0:32:28I'm now driving down a railway embankment...

0:32:28 > 0:32:29HE LAUGHS

0:32:29 > 0:32:33Ristorante Nino, Via Appia...

0:32:37 > 0:32:41Yeah, the ground clearance is very poor. OK.

0:32:44 > 0:32:47'Soon, though, after a short drive through a bit of history...'

0:32:47 > 0:32:50No! God Al-bloody-mighty!

0:32:50 > 0:32:53'..we were both near our destination.'

0:32:53 > 0:32:55I'm so close.

0:32:55 > 0:32:57BLEEP!

0:33:00 > 0:33:05Now, the restaurant is coming up in 30 metres. There it is.

0:33:05 > 0:33:08'All I had to do now was park.'

0:33:08 > 0:33:13That's Veneto. It's too wide. You see, if I park there, I just block the whole street.

0:33:13 > 0:33:17Oh, God. No, you're joking.

0:33:18 > 0:33:19No-o-o!

0:33:19 > 0:33:21How do you park a Lamborghini here?

0:33:21 > 0:33:24- CRUNCH! - Ohh-hh!

0:33:24 > 0:33:28Is that the piazza? I think it is. I'm right on top of it.

0:33:28 > 0:33:31Via Vittorio. It's correct!

0:33:31 > 0:33:34Right, parking space.

0:33:35 > 0:33:38- CRUNCH! - Hell's- BLEEP- bum- BLEEP- arseholes.

0:33:38 > 0:33:40Parking, parking, parking, parking.

0:33:40 > 0:33:43It's the easiest thing in the world, reversing a Lambo.

0:33:43 > 0:33:46You just get out of the car to do it.

0:33:48 > 0:33:51Can I go there? Why can't I go there? There's no lines.

0:33:51 > 0:33:54James May, get ready to lose.

0:33:58 > 0:34:04- Prego?- Prego. Have you seen a very long-haired man? An idiot?- Here.

0:34:09 > 0:34:13'After lunch, which I didn't bother with, because I was paying,

0:34:13 > 0:34:18'we decided to help Richard some more by going shopping.

0:34:18 > 0:34:21- 'And then, we got a bit of a surprise.'- That's Hammond.

0:34:21 > 0:34:23No, but it's not...

0:34:23 > 0:34:25ENGINE REVS

0:34:28 > 0:34:30That's a different car.

0:34:30 > 0:34:34No, no. This is still wet. Don't lean on it. I painted it.

0:34:34 > 0:34:37Maybe you thought, "I'll put the steering wheel on this side"(?)

0:34:37 > 0:34:43- It's always been on that side. You were looking at me in your rear-view mirror.- You have changed cars.

0:34:43 > 0:34:45- Hammond?- What?

0:34:46 > 0:34:49Oh, you're joking! Oh, come on!

0:34:49 > 0:34:51This isn't my car. Mine's red.

0:34:51 > 0:34:54- You haven't caused a stir. - Buongiorno.

0:34:54 > 0:34:56I think people have come to see...

0:34:59 > 0:35:01Did that first delivery driver...

0:35:01 > 0:35:04- Did that first repair man not say anything?- No.

0:35:04 > 0:35:08I don't think he could see me. "Hello! I'm here." No, nothing.

0:35:08 > 0:35:12Anyway, can we just ask - how did a tiny little company like Noble

0:35:12 > 0:35:16get another car out there so quickly? I'm being serious.

0:35:16 > 0:35:18- Be serious.- Seriously, they drove it.

0:35:18 > 0:35:21A bloke drove it from the factory, overnight,

0:35:21 > 0:35:24all the way from Leicester to Rome in one hit.

0:35:24 > 0:35:28That's what I call service. "Certainly, sir. We'll send you another car."

0:35:28 > 0:35:33- But it is Noble - you mean, "We'll send you THE other car"?- Yeah.

0:35:33 > 0:35:39Anyway, we'll pick that up later on. Now, though, it is time to put a star in our reasonably priced car.

0:35:39 > 0:35:43Let me list some songs. I'm Not In Love, Wichita Lineman, Lady In Red.

0:35:43 > 0:35:48My guest tonight hasn't recorded any of those.

0:35:48 > 0:35:53That's because he's from an organisation called the Black Eyed Peas.

0:35:53 > 0:35:56Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome will.i.am.

0:35:56 > 0:36:00CHEERING AND WHISTLING

0:36:02 > 0:36:05- How are you?- Good to see you. - Good to see you.

0:36:07 > 0:36:10Wow!

0:36:14 > 0:36:17Your e-mail address must be a nightmare!

0:36:17 > 0:36:24will.i.am.@.a.o.l.

0:36:24 > 0:36:27.uk.

0:36:27 > 0:36:29LAUGHTER

0:36:29 > 0:36:34I have never met anybody in my entire life who is apparently as busy as you are,

0:36:34 > 0:36:37because you're a fashion designer,

0:36:37 > 0:36:42you've worked for Obama, starred in X-Men Origins and Madagascar,

0:36:42 > 0:36:45you run a scholarship fund for disadvantaged youngsters,

0:36:45 > 0:36:49you're a creative director at Intel, you develop smartphones,

0:36:49 > 0:36:52produce everyone in the world, make your own music,

0:36:52 > 0:36:57you star in a band which licenses songs to Levi's, Pepsi, Honda, BlackBerry, Bacardi,

0:36:57 > 0:37:01- and now you've started a car company.- Yeah.- What is it?

0:37:01 > 0:37:03Tell us about it.

0:37:03 > 0:37:07So, um, when I was working at Intel, I found out a lot of the phones

0:37:07 > 0:37:09and the things that you have

0:37:09 > 0:37:12aren't really made by the name that's on the phone,

0:37:12 > 0:37:19- so there's all these companies in Southeast Asia that make all the equipment.- You mean the components?

0:37:19 > 0:37:23Yeah. Then you put them together, like a sandwich, and then you got your product.

0:37:23 > 0:37:25Then I got into my car -

0:37:25 > 0:37:30I want to know how much it cost to make this Bentley that I'm driving.

0:37:30 > 0:37:32- A Bentley?- Yeah.- About 38 pence!

0:37:32 > 0:37:38- Right.- Cos it's just a Volkswagen with some wood on the dashboard.

0:37:38 > 0:37:42So, for the past two years, we've been tooling - I design things on my computer.

0:37:42 > 0:37:44The first thing I did was a Thundervet,

0:37:44 > 0:37:48- where you take a Thunderbird and a vet... - We've got a photograph of it.

0:37:48 > 0:37:52- Yeah, that's a Thundervet. - Cos that looks like a '50s vet.

0:37:52 > 0:37:57- The white slash is '50s vet, but there's some Thunderbird in there, as well?- Yeah.

0:37:57 > 0:38:02So, the groove and stuff. And those wheels aren't white-wall tyres.

0:38:02 > 0:38:05That's a white-wall rim, with the five-spoke inside of it.

0:38:05 > 0:38:07Oh, that's the actual rim?

0:38:07 > 0:38:11- Yeah.- That's fantastic. So, what engine has it got?

0:38:11 > 0:38:14That has a super-sized Corvette engine in it.

0:38:14 > 0:38:18- And have you designed your own car now, with its own body? - Yes. So, that was just, you know,

0:38:18 > 0:38:21let's test what we can do with this.

0:38:21 > 0:38:24From there, we go on to something that we built from scratch.

0:38:24 > 0:38:29- I think we've got a picture of it, as well.- IAMAUTO 88.- That is...

0:38:29 > 0:38:32It's a bit like an old Maserati Quattroporte, except it's two-door.

0:38:32 > 0:38:35And that's made in California?

0:38:35 > 0:38:40- That's made down in the ghetto that I'm from.- Why...? Really?

0:38:40 > 0:38:44Yeah. My whole thing was, "I'm going to make music so I can take care of my mom,

0:38:44 > 0:38:45"and move my family out the ghetto."

0:38:45 > 0:38:49So, if that's what I want to do, then it's going to keep me going,

0:38:49 > 0:38:51so there's no "no" for an answer.

0:38:51 > 0:38:56So, now that I've done that, and every single person in my family -

0:38:56 > 0:38:59cousins, uncles, nieces and nephews - are out the ghetto,

0:38:59 > 0:39:03I want to go back to my ghetto and build a car company.

0:39:03 > 0:39:06We all complain about underdeveloped communities,

0:39:06 > 0:39:10but who are the developers in the first place?

0:39:10 > 0:39:13So, I was like, "I'm tired of complaining and pointing fingers.

0:39:13 > 0:39:16"Why don't I aim that finger to me and say,

0:39:16 > 0:39:20" 'Hey, what are you doing to change the ghetto you're from?' "

0:39:20 > 0:39:23Do you know, you're one of the most inspiring people

0:39:23 > 0:39:25we've ever had sitting in that sofa.

0:39:25 > 0:39:28He is, though, isn't he?

0:39:28 > 0:39:29APPLAUSE

0:39:29 > 0:39:34If everybody thought like that, we'd have 1.65% growth as well!

0:39:34 > 0:39:36Um, can we just go into your car history?

0:39:36 > 0:39:38Where did it begin? What was your first car?

0:39:38 > 0:39:42So, I got a record deal when I was 17 and I bought myself...

0:39:42 > 0:39:48cos I always wanted a Ferrari or a DeLorean.

0:39:48 > 0:39:52Those were my favourite cars. I couldn't afford those,

0:39:52 > 0:39:56so I got the poor man's Ferrari, which is a Fiero.

0:39:56 > 0:40:00Yeah, that's really poor. That's even the poor man's MR2.

0:40:00 > 0:40:02I had a yellow one.

0:40:02 > 0:40:06Mid-engine, so it was kind of like a Ferrari

0:40:06 > 0:40:09if you were standing five miles away and squinting!

0:40:09 > 0:40:14And then my next-door neighbour Pearleen snitched.

0:40:14 > 0:40:19She told my mom, "Ooh, Debra, Willy got himself a new car."

0:40:19 > 0:40:23And then my mom calls me in the house.

0:40:23 > 0:40:26"Boy, sit your butt down on this couch."

0:40:26 > 0:40:30"What, Momma?" "You got no business buying yourself no G-damn car."

0:40:30 > 0:40:31"Yeah, but..."

0:40:31 > 0:40:35"No but nothing. Gimme them damn keys."

0:40:35 > 0:40:39So she confiscated my car.

0:40:39 > 0:40:42So then I couldn't drive until I was 20.

0:40:42 > 0:40:47- So it just sat there? A 2,000...- ..Car.- For three years?

0:40:47 > 0:40:53For three years it sat there. I couldn't wait till I was 20, then I could drive it.

0:40:53 > 0:40:56Black Eyed Peas - how many records have you sold? Millions.

0:40:56 > 0:40:59- To date, 40 something million records.- 40 million?

0:40:59 > 0:41:02It is massive. And you've got...

0:41:02 > 0:41:05- APPLAUSE - Yeah! 40 million.

0:41:07 > 0:41:09And you've now got a solo album out.

0:41:09 > 0:41:15And it's called Squiggle Squiggle #willpower.

0:41:15 > 0:41:19- No, it's just #willpower. - #willpower.

0:41:19 > 0:41:23There are squiggles. Oh, it's a hash!

0:41:23 > 0:41:27- I just thought it was like a misprint.- No, no.

0:41:27 > 0:41:32Have you ever been interviewed by somebody more old than me?

0:41:32 > 0:41:34Um...no...

0:41:34 > 0:41:37Now, you came down here, obviously...well,

0:41:37 > 0:41:43looking at your gloves, to play golf, but, um, it isn't a Golf.

0:41:43 > 0:41:47No, no. The reason I have fingerless gloves is

0:41:47 > 0:41:50because I got touchscreen technology devices,

0:41:50 > 0:41:54so last thing you want is, in the cold, I have to go, "My phone is ringing..."

0:41:54 > 0:41:57No, cos you can buy gloves that have got fingerprint things,

0:41:57 > 0:42:00- so wearing... I've got a pair. - They're not fashion.

0:42:00 > 0:42:04- There you go!- They're the ugliest gloves in the world.

0:42:04 > 0:42:07They look pretty poor, I admit.

0:42:07 > 0:42:13You insisted, I believe, in driving the automatic car, rather than the stick-shift.

0:42:13 > 0:42:17- Yeah.- So, how did it go out there?

0:42:17 > 0:42:21I think I did pretty good, if you judge me on spinning.

0:42:21 > 0:42:26Well, now, who would like to see some of Will's spins?

0:42:26 > 0:42:27AUDIENCE: Yeah!

0:42:27 > 0:42:30We have a selection. Let's have a look.

0:42:30 > 0:42:33Yes, there we go. Second-to-last corner.

0:42:33 > 0:42:37Bold as brass. He's held it... No, he hasn't! Ooh!

0:42:37 > 0:42:40- That's a tank-slapper, that one was. - Yeah.- Here we go again.

0:42:43 > 0:42:45- Now...- Spinny!

0:42:45 > 0:42:48APPLAUSE

0:42:48 > 0:42:51Why are we applauding? Those were mistakes.

0:42:51 > 0:42:56- You probably want to have a different spin award...- Yeah.

0:42:56 > 0:42:59Who would like to see the finished lap?

0:42:59 > 0:43:02- AUDIENCE: Yeah! - Let's play the tape. Here we go.

0:43:02 > 0:43:05TYRES SPIN

0:43:05 > 0:43:08Needs to spin with an automatic box. Like to see it!

0:43:08 > 0:43:10Right, here we go.

0:43:11 > 0:43:15Here's the first corner. Wide line, like a Formula 1 driver.

0:43:17 > 0:43:19Tyre squeal - even in the wet!

0:43:19 > 0:43:22Oh, that's nicely done. That was nicely done.

0:43:22 > 0:43:24Brake...

0:43:24 > 0:43:26A man of few words.

0:43:26 > 0:43:29That's nice and smooth through there.

0:43:29 > 0:43:33Good wide lines, so you can get the power down. And up to the Hammerhead.

0:43:33 > 0:43:36# Da-da-da-boom-boom-boom

0:43:36 > 0:43:38# Brake hard, brake here... #

0:43:38 > 0:43:42- Were you singing? - To keep myself focused and stuff.

0:43:42 > 0:43:44I was getting kinda nervous.

0:43:44 > 0:43:48- # The line and the lines... # - It's good.

0:43:48 > 0:43:52C apostrophe D now. Listen to that engine.

0:43:52 > 0:43:55Wow! That's a sporty noise.

0:43:55 > 0:43:57Go! Stupid car!

0:44:00 > 0:44:02Looking good through there...

0:44:02 > 0:44:06Oh, there's a bit of dirt from an earlier spin coming out.

0:44:06 > 0:44:08Through the tyres.

0:44:08 > 0:44:12Are we going to get through the second-to-last without a problem?

0:44:12 > 0:44:16That was cut perfectly. And Gambon...

0:44:16 > 0:44:18Keep it in tight... All right, don't.

0:44:18 > 0:44:21And there we are! And across the line!

0:44:21 > 0:44:24Wey-hey-hey!

0:44:28 > 0:44:31So... Now, you're driving the automatic,

0:44:31 > 0:44:33so that's slower, obviously,

0:44:33 > 0:44:39and it's raining, so we're not looking for a particularly fast time.

0:44:39 > 0:44:41Um...but... I'm trying to think, actually.

0:44:41 > 0:44:44Automatic drivers - we've only had two so far in this car.

0:44:44 > 0:44:47They are John Prescott.

0:44:47 > 0:44:51- LAUGHTER - You don't know John Prescott?- Hmm.

0:44:51 > 0:44:52He's a fashion designer.

0:44:52 > 0:44:54LAUGHTER

0:44:54 > 0:44:56And Alice Cooper. OK?

0:44:56 > 0:45:00- Those are the only automatics, and they're both 1.56.- And they're wet.

0:45:00 > 0:45:04Oh, yeah. Both had wet days, both driving automatics.

0:45:04 > 0:45:07Both in the 1.56.3 region.

0:45:07 > 0:45:12will.i.am., you did it in 1...

0:45:13 > 0:45:15..40...

0:45:15 > 0:45:17AUDIENCE: Whoo!

0:45:17 > 0:45:20..9.4.

0:45:20 > 0:45:22So, you get wet and auto,

0:45:22 > 0:45:27- and that's the fastest we've ever had in that car in those conditions!- Yay!

0:45:27 > 0:45:29You are...there.

0:45:34 > 0:45:38So, above Peta, 23, from Essex... Below Jonathan Ross.

0:45:38 > 0:45:40- Stig did a good thing, then. - Oh, yeah.

0:45:40 > 0:45:42That was impressive, and you were trying.

0:45:42 > 0:45:46It has been genuinely inspirational having you here,

0:45:46 > 0:45:50- and an enormous pleasure. Ladies and gentlemen, will.i.am! - Thank you!

0:45:52 > 0:45:55Thank you very, very much. Was that OK?

0:46:04 > 0:46:08Right, now, we must get back to our big supercar test.

0:46:08 > 0:46:12So far, we've established that my Noble is the fastest and the most economical.

0:46:12 > 0:46:18- The most unreliable.- Yes, funny. - We've also established that the McLaren is the best around town,

0:46:18 > 0:46:24- and that Jeremy's big, idiotic Lamborghini hasn't actually won anything.- Nothing! Zero.

0:46:24 > 0:46:28- Hmm.- Nil. Zilch. Rien. Nowt.

0:46:28 > 0:46:32- The square root of Jack. - Nothing - we've established that!

0:46:32 > 0:46:36Let's move on, because it's time now for part three,

0:46:36 > 0:46:40in which we three must face the most dangerous thing we've ever done.

0:46:44 > 0:46:47'As we headed north to our date with destiny,

0:46:47 > 0:46:51'we started to think about how our cars compare to the daddy.'

0:46:51 > 0:46:54Three days ago, if you'd said to me,

0:46:54 > 0:46:58"Which would you rather have, an Aventador or Ferrari 458?"

0:46:58 > 0:47:02I would have said, "The Ferrari." I mean, it's the obvious choice.

0:47:02 > 0:47:06But now... No, I'd have this.

0:47:06 > 0:47:13I know a Ferrari 458 is just a technical masterpiece and it looks wonderful,

0:47:13 > 0:47:19but this has got something the Ferrari doesn't have. It has... It has a character.

0:47:20 > 0:47:23It's like a big, daft orange dog!

0:47:23 > 0:47:25Everybody wants a big, daft orange dog!

0:47:28 > 0:47:33It's won me over. Completely. It's not just the best car here.

0:47:33 > 0:47:35It's better than the Ferrari 458.

0:47:35 > 0:47:39For me, it's one of the best cars in the world now. I absolutely love it.

0:47:39 > 0:47:45It feels like a race car but without the impracticality and discomfort.

0:47:45 > 0:47:49And, yes, they're a small make in the UK that nobody has ever heard of.

0:47:49 > 0:47:55Well, at one time, so was Mr Pagani, making his Zonda.

0:47:57 > 0:48:00So, that's two votes against the Ferrari. But what about James?

0:48:00 > 0:48:04This is brilliant. I'm really, really growing to like it,

0:48:04 > 0:48:10and let's not forget it's £35,000 or so cheaper than the Ferrari 458.

0:48:10 > 0:48:14And that is a huge amount of money.

0:48:14 > 0:48:17But there's still... I don't know.

0:48:17 > 0:48:20The Ferrari, I think the gear change feels a bit crisper,

0:48:20 > 0:48:23and everything feels a little better defined, somehow.

0:48:23 > 0:48:26It's the fizz, I'm afraid. I can't explain it. I just...

0:48:26 > 0:48:29The Ferrari still gives me more fizz.

0:48:32 > 0:48:34'You have reached your destination.'

0:48:34 > 0:48:38'The destination turned out to be a racetrack...

0:48:38 > 0:48:41'called Imola...

0:48:43 > 0:48:45'..where, after a quick change,

0:48:45 > 0:48:49'we were told to report to the pits for a challenge.'

0:48:49 > 0:48:56"You will now lap the circuit, attempting to beat the time set by a Ferrari 458."

0:48:56 > 0:48:59- Who's driving a 458? - It says here he's not The Stig.

0:48:59 > 0:49:02But he is The Stig's Italian cousin!

0:49:10 > 0:49:12It's "Bunga-Bunga" Stig.

0:49:12 > 0:49:15What's he been doing?!

0:49:15 > 0:49:17Cards.

0:49:20 > 0:49:23'Whatever it was he'd been doing,

0:49:23 > 0:49:28'he plainly still had plenty of energy left for driving.

0:49:28 > 0:49:34'And posted a daunting time of 1.56.6.

0:49:34 > 0:49:38'Before trying to beat that, we thought it best to spend

0:49:38 > 0:49:43'a little time learning how our cars behaved on a proper racetrack.'

0:49:48 > 0:49:53That gear change in track mode is absolutely savage.

0:49:55 > 0:49:57Ride that kerb!

0:49:58 > 0:50:01Four-wheel drive system is breathtaking.

0:50:01 > 0:50:05The power is constantly moving around - front, back,

0:50:05 > 0:50:09side to side - so you've always got the grip you need.

0:50:11 > 0:50:14The good thing is, I have carbon brakes which will not fade.

0:50:14 > 0:50:18Poor old Hammond has got steel brakes, which will.

0:50:19 > 0:50:21Focus. Smoothness.

0:50:21 > 0:50:27A car like this, with no driver aids, no computers messing about, it's just you and the car.

0:50:27 > 0:50:31The only chance I stand here is to get it out of the corners

0:50:31 > 0:50:34in such a shape that I can use that power.

0:50:36 > 0:50:40Of course, the McLaren does have a lot of driver aids,

0:50:40 > 0:50:45but Captain Sense Of Direction had more important things on his mind.

0:50:45 > 0:50:48What's this one? I can't remember.

0:50:48 > 0:50:52This is the bit where I don't have to brake...

0:50:52 > 0:50:53If I can remember this bit...

0:50:55 > 0:50:59At the end of the day, we knew the circuit and we knew our cars.

0:50:59 > 0:51:03But still, we were not feeling even remotely confident,

0:51:03 > 0:51:05because this is Imola...

0:51:06 > 0:51:09..one of the most dangerous tracks on Earth.

0:51:09 > 0:51:15It's narrow, fast and ringed with unforgiving walls and trees.

0:51:16 > 0:51:19At some point in history,

0:51:19 > 0:51:21every corner here has claimed the ego of a big name.

0:51:21 > 0:51:25And some corners have claimed even more than that.

0:51:29 > 0:51:32After Senna's death in 1994,

0:51:32 > 0:51:35changes were made to the track to slow the cars down,

0:51:35 > 0:51:39but even so, if we were going to beat that Ferrari,

0:51:39 > 0:51:43we would still be going through the first bend at nearly 200mph.

0:51:49 > 0:51:55So, that night, each of us spent a little time alone with the cars we'd be using.

0:51:56 > 0:51:59YOU are Juventus.

0:51:59 > 0:52:05And tomorrow, you're taking on Woking Town and Leicester City.

0:52:05 > 0:52:07And everybody in England

0:52:07 > 0:52:11is going to want them to win, because they're the underdogs.

0:52:11 > 0:52:13But don't you worry.

0:52:15 > 0:52:20We haven't won a single challenge yet,

0:52:20 > 0:52:24but tomorrow...that will change.

0:52:25 > 0:52:30You're not going into battle armed with a sophisticated computer and wizardry,

0:52:30 > 0:52:34clever suspension, four-wheel drive. You're just going in with an engine.

0:52:34 > 0:52:38Doing it the old-fashioned way.

0:52:38 > 0:52:42Underdog or not, I know you've got it in you now.

0:52:44 > 0:52:46I'd love us to win.

0:52:46 > 0:52:52Just remember, as we're going round and you're despairing of my terrible gear changes

0:52:52 > 0:52:54and my bad apexes, and things,

0:52:54 > 0:53:00you're made by McLaren. You've got the best race pedigree. You've got clever suspension,

0:53:00 > 0:53:03you've got no roll bars, you've got a computer,

0:53:03 > 0:53:06you can brake the wheel for me, you can virtually do it by yourself.

0:53:06 > 0:53:12All you have to do is humour me a bit, and remember that I'm Captain Slow.

0:53:12 > 0:53:16Or Mr Slowly, as the Italians call me.

0:53:18 > 0:53:19'The next morning,

0:53:19 > 0:53:26'we ventured onto this terrifying track to try and beat The Stig's 1.56.6.'

0:53:31 > 0:53:33God, this is quick!

0:53:35 > 0:53:37Oh, my giddy aunt!

0:53:37 > 0:53:40I'm off the road!

0:53:40 > 0:53:42I'm on it again!

0:53:43 > 0:53:46My God, I'm faster here.

0:53:48 > 0:53:50- This is outrageous. Oh,- BLEEP.

0:53:55 > 0:53:58Now, faster than you think. Don't be a wimp.

0:54:00 > 0:54:02Agh! A bit of wee may be coming out!

0:54:05 > 0:54:08Don't brake too early. Don't brake too early. Now!

0:54:10 > 0:54:12Better.

0:54:12 > 0:54:18'Unusually, we were all taking this challenge very seriously...'

0:54:19 > 0:54:23- A 5.4 to a 4.9.- Oh, no. I'm still on 2.07.

0:54:25 > 0:54:30'..but we knew we'd have to try even harder if we were going to beat that Ferrari.'

0:54:30 > 0:54:35Right, come on, May, you blithering idiot. Avanti.

0:54:38 > 0:54:40Good!

0:54:40 > 0:54:42In... Break them down.

0:54:42 > 0:54:45BLEEP!

0:54:45 > 0:54:46Get cocky!

0:54:49 > 0:54:52The track WILL be there. Keep it in!

0:54:56 > 0:54:58Yes!

0:54:58 > 0:55:00I'm going a bit mental here, now.

0:55:03 > 0:55:06Brake... Ooh, that's messy.

0:55:09 > 0:55:14I'm going to go for 5th. I'm going to take as much through here as I bloody dare. Oh!

0:55:14 > 0:55:16- Oh,- BLEEP! BLEEP!

0:55:16 > 0:55:19TYRES SQUEAL

0:55:19 > 0:55:20BLEEP!

0:55:20 > 0:55:22GRAVEL CRUNCHES

0:55:24 > 0:55:26Come on!

0:55:26 > 0:55:28290...

0:55:30 > 0:55:34OK, brakes have gone. Whoa. Failure from the brakes.

0:55:36 > 0:55:40After my brakes had cooled, and Hammond had emptied his car of gravel,

0:55:40 > 0:55:46we went back out for one final attempt to beat the 458.

0:55:46 > 0:55:51And the Lambo is only... Here we go! Come on!

0:55:53 > 0:55:56OK, this is it. I'm doing this one for Leicester!

0:55:56 > 0:56:00Right, beans!

0:56:03 > 0:56:06That's it!

0:56:07 > 0:56:10Blah-blah-blah-blah!

0:56:11 > 0:56:13And now brake!

0:56:14 > 0:56:17I've done the difficult bit!

0:56:17 > 0:56:20It will go round, it WILL.

0:56:20 > 0:56:21Come on!

0:56:23 > 0:56:26And brake...

0:56:26 > 0:56:30And back on the power as soon as you can. Now. NOW! NOW! Power!

0:56:43 > 0:56:46Stay right, stay right, stay right! Stay right, now!

0:56:50 > 0:56:54Stretch it, stretch it! Come on! Come on!

0:56:54 > 0:56:56Come on! Come on!

0:56:59 > 0:57:01You can do it! Come on!

0:57:12 > 0:57:15CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:57:15 > 0:57:18- That looked as scary as it was. - Yes, it was scary.

0:57:18 > 0:57:21It's that palpable sense of, "Oh, my God!"

0:57:21 > 0:57:26Because I have to say, as you go past the pits, the track is not straight,

0:57:26 > 0:57:29it's a curve, and you daren't lift off, because the crews,

0:57:29 > 0:57:34they can hear the engine note change, so you have to keep your foot hard down.

0:57:34 > 0:57:38- It was terrifying. - It is 200 and...?- Over 200.

0:57:38 > 0:57:44All three of us doing over 200, and that's faster than a Formula 1 car, was going through there.

0:57:44 > 0:57:46They could only do about 180.

0:57:46 > 0:57:50I don't know, because I had my eyes shut. It was terrifying.

0:57:50 > 0:57:55Anyway, it is time now to reveal who was the fastest of the three of us.

0:57:55 > 0:57:59- Richard Hammond?- I did it in 2 minutes and 3.3 seconds.

0:57:59 > 0:58:01That's the best I could do.

0:58:01 > 0:58:02Mr Slowly?

0:58:02 > 0:58:062 minutes 6.4.

0:58:06 > 0:58:08- Yes!- And you?

0:58:08 > 0:58:13- It's so difficult not to look smug at this point.- Oh, God!

0:58:13 > 0:58:19- It's not working. - 1...- Ooh!- ..59.1.

0:58:19 > 0:58:20Well done.

0:58:23 > 0:58:25You're not pulling it off.

0:58:28 > 0:58:31- It's not working.- It isn't. No, I'll forget it.

0:58:31 > 0:58:34Let me just straighten this out, OK? Well done.

0:58:34 > 0:58:38- We gave it everything, each of us, and we didn't beat the Ferrari.- No.

0:58:38 > 0:58:40Hang on. That's not strictly relevant,

0:58:40 > 0:58:45because the point of this was to see which car you should have IF you didn't want a Ferrari.

0:58:45 > 0:58:48- Yes, it's the Lambo.- No. - It isn't.- It IS the Lambo.

0:58:48 > 0:58:50I admit it's not a brilliant track car,

0:58:50 > 0:58:53because at Nardo its tyres had to be changed, there was a problem there,

0:58:53 > 0:58:56and somehow it boiled its carbon brakes at Imola.

0:58:56 > 0:58:57I don't know how it did that.

0:58:57 > 0:59:03But it IS a big, daft orange dog, AND blue stuff comes out of the exhaust.

0:59:03 > 0:59:09No. Look, that Noble taught me more about driving in that one day

0:59:09 > 0:59:11than any other car has ever taught me.

0:59:11 > 0:59:15- It's about the real undiluted experience.- Silence.

0:59:15 > 0:59:19The McLaren is the closest thing to the 458, which is the best,

0:59:19 > 0:59:21therefore the McLaren is the best car here.

0:59:21 > 0:59:25- It's that simple.- Does blue stuff come out of the exhaust?- No.

0:59:25 > 0:59:28- Exactly. Well, there you are. - The thing is, we can't agree.

0:59:28 > 0:59:30- And actually, we never will.- No.

0:59:30 > 0:59:33And on that bombshell, it is time to end. Thanks very much for watching.

0:59:33 > 0:59:35See you next week. Good night!

0:59:44 > 0:59:48Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd