0:00:11 > 0:00:15Tonight, I drive around a field,
0:00:15 > 0:00:18James measures a runway,
0:00:18 > 0:00:21and Richard lays a cable.
0:00:25 > 0:00:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:28 > 0:00:31Thank you. Hello, everybody!
0:00:31 > 0:00:35Hello and good evening. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you.
0:00:35 > 0:00:42Now, as we know, James May lives in 1956.
0:00:42 > 0:00:47So he maintains that you can have more fun in a small, simple car
0:00:47 > 0:00:50like an Austin A35 or a Wolseley Hornet, than you
0:00:50 > 0:00:53can in the big, fire-spitting supercars
0:00:53 > 0:00:56that Hammond and I thump round the track every week.
0:00:56 > 0:00:59Yes, so we said to him, "All right, as a special treat this week,
0:00:59 > 0:01:01"why don't you do the power test?
0:01:01 > 0:01:04"Get yourself down to the track because we have found a car
0:01:04 > 0:01:08"that could have been made specifically with you in mind."
0:01:08 > 0:01:09JEREMY CACKLES
0:01:12 > 0:01:17When I arrived at the track, everything looked promising.
0:01:17 > 0:01:19That is...
0:01:19 > 0:01:21a Vauxhall Corsa.
0:01:23 > 0:01:25Ah, there's a note.
0:01:26 > 0:01:28It's from Pinky and Perky.
0:01:28 > 0:01:31"Dear James, hope you enjoy taking this to the max.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34"PS, it was developed at your most favourite place
0:01:34 > 0:01:36"in the whole wide world."
0:01:44 > 0:01:46Oh, God.
0:01:47 > 0:01:50This wasn't what I had in mind.
0:01:50 > 0:01:54But since I was here and the camera crew were paid for,
0:01:54 > 0:01:55I had no choice but to get on with it.
0:01:58 > 0:02:02Well, it's certainly quick. 0 to 60 in 6.5 seconds.
0:02:04 > 0:02:07And a top speed of 145 miles an hour.
0:02:07 > 0:02:10Hell, this is a Vauxhall Corsa!
0:02:12 > 0:02:17The engine is a beefed-up version of the standard 1.6-litre turbo.
0:02:17 > 0:02:21And it's now been coupled with a new sports exhaust,
0:02:21 > 0:02:26as a result of which, it produces 202 horsepower.
0:02:27 > 0:02:31202 horsepower is a huge amount put through the front wheels
0:02:31 > 0:02:33of a small car like this.
0:02:33 > 0:02:37And the results ought to be pretty dramatic.
0:02:37 > 0:02:41And by dramatic, I mean, of course, appalling in the bends.
0:02:41 > 0:02:45So let's see if that's true with the aid of our senior
0:02:45 > 0:02:47cornering solutions consultant.
0:02:47 > 0:02:50TYRES SQUEAL
0:02:57 > 0:03:00Now, on paper, this really ought not to work,
0:03:00 > 0:03:03all that power in the front wheels should just make it
0:03:03 > 0:03:07plough straight on in the corners and consume its own tyres.
0:03:07 > 0:03:08But actually, it doesn't.
0:03:09 > 0:03:14The reason for that is they've given this car a bespoke suspension,
0:03:14 > 0:03:18especially set-up for this and they've developed a clever diff,
0:03:18 > 0:03:22which manages the way the power is fed to the wheels.
0:03:27 > 0:03:28It's good, isn't it?
0:03:32 > 0:03:34It's actually better than good.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37And I have to admit, that its time on the Nurburgring has made this
0:03:37 > 0:03:40one of the best-handling hot hatchbacks you can buy.
0:03:43 > 0:03:48So it was developed on a track. And it's brilliant on a track.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50But on the road...
0:03:50 > 0:03:52Bloody hell.
0:03:52 > 0:03:55Well, I'm very pleased to be able to report that my prejudices
0:03:55 > 0:03:56remain completely intact.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00When you add the word Nurburgring to the name of a car,
0:04:00 > 0:04:02it's really just code for "ruined",
0:04:02 > 0:04:05because the ride is absolutely rock hard.
0:04:05 > 0:04:08Ooh! It's ridiculous.
0:04:08 > 0:04:09Ooh!
0:04:09 > 0:04:12Car makers become obsessed with making their cars
0:04:12 > 0:04:15go around this irrelevant historic...
0:04:15 > 0:04:18German racetrack as fast as possible,
0:04:18 > 0:04:21without realising that they're ruining the car
0:04:21 > 0:04:23for those of us who live in the real world.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26Ow! It's utterly hopeless.
0:04:30 > 0:04:34It's not just ruined, it's expensively ruined,
0:04:34 > 0:04:37because this car costs £22,000.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39With a few options, like leather seats and sat nav,
0:04:39 > 0:04:42it's over £24,000.
0:04:43 > 0:04:47This isn't what I meant when I said small cars can be fun.
0:04:50 > 0:04:55What I meant was this - the new Fiat Panda.
0:04:55 > 0:05:00It doesn't have a yobbo body kit or a map of a track on the dash
0:05:00 > 0:05:03and although its engine IS turbocharged,
0:05:03 > 0:05:10it's only a 0.8-litre two-cylinder that makes a modest 84 horsepower.
0:05:10 > 0:05:15Yet, I believe this car is more fun than the Corsa.
0:05:20 > 0:05:22TYRES SQUEAL
0:05:22 > 0:05:25It's not actually about how much power you have,
0:05:25 > 0:05:28it's about how much power you can use.
0:05:28 > 0:05:33And in this, you can use pretty much all of it, all of the time.
0:05:36 > 0:05:37Ahh!
0:05:37 > 0:05:40HE LAUGHS
0:05:40 > 0:05:45'Look, I like sitting 5mm above the road in a 500 horsepower supercar
0:05:45 > 0:05:46'as much as anybody else.'
0:05:46 > 0:05:48Whee!
0:05:48 > 0:05:51'But skinny tyres and a roly-poly body, that's fun.'
0:05:51 > 0:05:55The lack of grip means that, more of the time,
0:05:55 > 0:05:58you are driving this car at the edge, even at quite normal speeds
0:05:58 > 0:06:02and it's at the edge where things become absolutely tremendous.
0:06:05 > 0:06:07Oh, bit of squirrelling.
0:06:07 > 0:06:11And as for that engine, well, it may be tiny but it packs a punch.
0:06:12 > 0:06:16And it sounds just brilliant.
0:06:16 > 0:06:20I love that thrumming noise! Rrrrrr!
0:06:20 > 0:06:23It's such a happy sound.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26It's a bit like a dog running round with a frisbee in its mouth going
0:06:26 > 0:06:28"Come on, come on, throw the frisbee."
0:06:30 > 0:06:33And the cost of this bundle of fun?
0:06:33 > 0:06:35Around £11,000.
0:06:35 > 0:06:38Half the price of the Corsa.
0:06:39 > 0:06:45However, there is a potential problem with a small-engined car.
0:06:46 > 0:06:49Here's the Stig, taking the Panda from 0...
0:06:53 > 0:06:55..to 70 and back to nought again.
0:06:59 > 0:07:05He did that, according to the wheel o'distance,
0:07:05 > 0:07:07in 305 metres.
0:07:07 > 0:07:12But the big question is, how does a small-engined car like this cope
0:07:12 > 0:07:14when it's weighed down with people?
0:07:16 > 0:07:19Now, if it's just the Stig, then it makes no odds,
0:07:19 > 0:07:20as you can see quite clearly.
0:07:20 > 0:07:23But if it's normal members of the public,
0:07:23 > 0:07:25then I think we may have a problem.
0:07:26 > 0:07:29You see, according to the newspapers,
0:07:29 > 0:07:32more than a quarter of adults are now obese.
0:07:32 > 0:07:35And in just a few years' time,
0:07:35 > 0:07:39over 50% of the population will be absolutely enormous.
0:07:39 > 0:07:42So, what could a typical family of the future
0:07:42 > 0:07:45do to this car's performance?
0:08:06 > 0:08:07BEEP
0:08:07 > 0:08:09TYRES SQUEAL
0:08:14 > 0:08:15320...
0:08:17 > 0:08:19325...
0:08:19 > 0:08:24Right, so with just the Stig, it was 305 metres.
0:08:24 > 0:08:30With our family on board, it took an extra 177 metres,
0:08:30 > 0:08:32more than half as much again.
0:08:35 > 0:08:37So, if you buy this car,
0:08:37 > 0:08:39you might want to think about going easy on the pasties.
0:08:42 > 0:08:45But trust me, it's worth it.
0:08:48 > 0:08:51James Hunt was once famously asked,
0:08:51 > 0:08:54what was the best car he'd ever driven and the answer was not
0:08:54 > 0:08:57a Ferrari or a Porsche or any supercar,
0:08:57 > 0:09:00it was his old Austin A35 van,
0:09:00 > 0:09:05which had virtually no power and very, very skinny tyres.
0:09:05 > 0:09:09In other words, exactly the same qualities you get with the Panda.
0:09:10 > 0:09:14And if that's good enough for James Hunt, I rest my case.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16Thank you.
0:09:16 > 0:09:18And goodbye.
0:09:22 > 0:09:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:28 > 0:09:29I'm...
0:09:31 > 0:09:34I'm glad you brought James Hunt into it, James -
0:09:34 > 0:09:36I'm always getting you two muddled up.
0:09:36 > 0:09:39Well, we do have quite a lot in common. I mean, same name.
0:09:39 > 0:09:42- Same hair. - I wish you had the same pulse rate.
0:09:42 > 0:09:46Because I have never heard so much drivel.
0:09:46 > 0:09:49Let me make it absolutely plain.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52A car becomes interesting at the limit of grip of its tyres, OK?
0:09:52 > 0:09:55And in things like a big Lambo or a big Aston, those things you like,
0:09:55 > 0:09:57that happens at really colossal speed.
0:09:57 > 0:10:02- So you have to drive them on the track to have fun in them.- Yes.
0:10:02 > 0:10:04On a car like this, that stuff happens at normal speeds,
0:10:04 > 0:10:06so you don't need to go to the track.
0:10:06 > 0:10:09You enjoy them on a normal road at normal speeds.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12That's rubbish. A normal hatchback, you drive it round a city centre,
0:10:12 > 0:10:16- it's not skidding about all over the place.- But this is.
0:10:16 > 0:10:19This is on those eco fuel-saving tyres. I went straight off...
0:10:19 > 0:10:23So you're saying, the Fiat Panda's good because it crashes more easily?
0:10:23 > 0:10:25LAUGHTER
0:10:25 > 0:10:26Yes.
0:10:26 > 0:10:30And, it's now time to find out how fast it goes around our track.
0:10:30 > 0:10:33No, no, no. The programme isn't long enough to put a Panda round.
0:10:33 > 0:10:35- Oh, go on!- It isn't, it isn't.
0:10:35 > 0:10:38We're going to see how fast the Vauxhall goes and that means,
0:10:38 > 0:10:41of course, handing it over to our tame racing driver.
0:10:41 > 0:10:47Some say that he has 50,000 photographs of his own camera.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49LAUGHTER
0:10:49 > 0:10:53And that 60 years ago this week, he, too, became a queen.
0:10:53 > 0:10:54LAUGHTER
0:10:54 > 0:10:57All we know is he's called the Stig!
0:10:59 > 0:11:01And he's away. Lots of wheel spin off the line.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03It's a cold day out there.
0:11:03 > 0:11:07The air's dense and small turbocharged engines like that.
0:11:07 > 0:11:09Look at it flying into the first corner.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12Sticky tyres howling in pain.
0:11:12 > 0:11:15"THE ARCHERS" THEME TUNE
0:11:15 > 0:11:19Oh, dear, the Stig continues his obsession with The Archers,
0:11:19 > 0:11:22tracking tidily around Chicago.
0:11:22 > 0:11:25Clever limited slip diff doing its job.
0:11:25 > 0:11:28Hard on the brakes for Hammerhead. Will it understeer?
0:11:28 > 0:11:30No. Getting a bit squirrelly, though.
0:11:30 > 0:11:32Looks like the back end wants to step out.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35Certainly more exciting to watch than May's Panda.
0:11:35 > 0:11:40'I'm not very hungry. I've been nibbling all morning making stuff for the freezer for Thursday.'
0:11:40 > 0:11:42Midlands mimsy there.
0:11:42 > 0:11:46Right, unleashing all its got. Chucking snow on to the follow-through.
0:11:46 > 0:11:50There's no doubt, cars developed at the Nurburgring are useless on the road.
0:11:50 > 0:11:53James is right about that but this isn't a road and it's doing well.
0:11:53 > 0:11:56A little blob of phlegm. Coming up now to Gambon.
0:11:56 > 0:11:59Round it like it terrier and across the line!
0:11:59 > 0:12:03APPLAUSE
0:12:03 > 0:12:07And it did it in one minute...
0:12:07 > 0:12:1019.2.
0:12:10 > 0:12:12No, it didn't.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15One minute 31 seconds is where it did it.
0:12:15 > 0:12:18So, James, can we now stop doing small, simple hatchbacks
0:12:18 > 0:12:21- in the power tests?- You can, yes. - Good, thank you.
0:12:21 > 0:12:23You are sacked.
0:12:23 > 0:12:24LAUGHTER
0:12:24 > 0:12:28Well, that's good news. And speaking of which, it is time to do the news.
0:12:28 > 0:12:31I start off with something very exciting. Because there is
0:12:31 > 0:12:33a new Morgan and after an absence of ten years,
0:12:33 > 0:12:35they have revived their legendary Plus 8 name.
0:12:35 > 0:12:39They've made a new one. I have a picture. Here it is. Oh, yeah.
0:12:39 > 0:12:41Oh, God. Morgan don't have a styling department, do they?
0:12:41 > 0:12:44They've just got a photocopier.
0:12:44 > 0:12:48It's not like a normal photocopier. Normally, you select the size.
0:12:48 > 0:12:52On Morgans, you select the year. Anything from 1931 to 1935.
0:12:52 > 0:12:55Shut up. It's an all-new car. It's got the classic body shape, yes.
0:12:55 > 0:12:59But it's got a 4.8-litre BMW V8 in there.
0:12:59 > 0:13:01It'll be good for 60, probably under four seconds.
0:13:01 > 0:13:05It's going to be the fastest-accelerating Morgan they've made ever.
0:13:05 > 0:13:08- Wow(!)- It's exciting!
0:13:08 > 0:13:11- Do you have to buy the petrol with those ration coupons?- No, shut up.
0:13:11 > 0:13:13It's actually very modern.
0:13:13 > 0:13:16It's got a bonded aluminium chassis and the aluminium body
0:13:16 > 0:13:19- is super formed, it's very hi tech. What?- How many guineas is it?
0:13:19 > 0:13:21LAUGHTER
0:13:21 > 0:13:23Its 85,000 POUNDS.
0:13:23 > 0:13:28It's very modern and hi-tech and I want one of those very much indeed. It's fantastic.
0:13:28 > 0:13:31- You can't have one, there's a war on. - LAUGHTER
0:13:31 > 0:13:36- They'll have to melt it down to make Spitfires.- Shut up, it's exciting and I want one.
0:13:36 > 0:13:39- Good news, chaps.- No, what? - There's a new Dacia.
0:13:39 > 0:13:40- CHEERING - Thank you.
0:13:40 > 0:13:45- And I've got a picture of it. - That's a looker, isn't it?!
0:13:45 > 0:13:46Anyway, moving on.
0:13:48 > 0:13:51Whiplash is a charter for fraudsters.
0:13:51 > 0:13:53We all know this. You have a car accident
0:13:53 > 0:13:54and you go, "Oh, I've got whiplash,"
0:13:54 > 0:13:57and you rape the other motorist's insurance policy
0:13:57 > 0:14:00and you get benefits for the rest of your life.
0:14:00 > 0:14:02The Government has said this has to stop.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05So they have announced, the Government, all right,
0:14:05 > 0:14:10that if the impact speed is less than 6.25 miles an hour,
0:14:10 > 0:14:12you can't have whiplash.
0:14:12 > 0:14:15- 6.25?- 6.25.
0:14:15 > 0:14:19But they're also saying that if it is 6.5, you could get whiplash at that speed.
0:14:19 > 0:14:21You can do that speed sitting down quickly.
0:14:21 > 0:14:24Look, I'm doing 6.25, I've got whiplash.
0:14:24 > 0:14:28It should be 63. That would be a reasonable speed.
0:14:28 > 0:14:32The question should be, he is your car absolutely and entirely wrecked?
0:14:32 > 0:14:36Is it crumpled like a discarded crisp bag, in which case, you might have a point.
0:14:36 > 0:14:40Has the boot lid badge been a stencilled on to your own spine?
0:14:40 > 0:14:43Well, then you've got whiplash.
0:14:43 > 0:14:46No, it's can you actually look up your own arse now?
0:14:46 > 0:14:47LAUGHTER
0:14:47 > 0:14:51- Then you've possibly got some whiplash.- Could be.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54I do genuinely believe that people who've got whiplash when they haven't,
0:14:54 > 0:14:58I don't believe in capital punishment, but they should be shot.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01- Where would you shoot them? - In the head.
0:15:01 > 0:15:05- I meant more sort of geographically. - Yeah.
0:15:05 > 0:15:06Oh, God.
0:15:06 > 0:15:09On their own or in front of anyone, Do you want to say that? Sort it out.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Goes well when you do. Maybe on a different show.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15Let's just get it so we can straighten out your belief.
0:15:15 > 0:15:19Who do you think should be shot, where and in front of whom?
0:15:19 > 0:15:21Oh, now, moving it on...
0:15:21 > 0:15:23LAUGHTER
0:15:23 > 0:15:27- I've got some actual news. - Don't be daft.- In our news section?
0:15:27 > 0:15:30In the news section. It's not just rubbish.
0:15:30 > 0:15:33- Careful, we're in uncharted waters here.- OK.
0:15:33 > 0:15:37I have it on good authority that Land Rover is currently working
0:15:37 > 0:15:42on a 300-horsepower convertible version of the new Evoke.
0:15:42 > 0:15:44The Evoke? Have you got a picture?
0:15:44 > 0:15:47I've got a picture here of the hard-top one. It's so secret, this.
0:15:47 > 0:15:51Only I... Well, everybody now knows about it. So I thought...
0:15:51 > 0:15:54Stand back, he's got scissors!
0:15:55 > 0:15:58Oh ho! Look at him concentrate, look at him now!
0:15:58 > 0:16:01LAUGHTER
0:16:01 > 0:16:04It's the Top Gear orang-utan, look at his happy little face.
0:16:04 > 0:16:07Completely absorbed in his own world.
0:16:07 > 0:16:09And if you watch very carefully,
0:16:09 > 0:16:11you can see Jeremy's mouth moving in time.
0:16:13 > 0:16:15It's quite tricky going down the wing mirror.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18- A tricky bit now, isn't it?- Ready?
0:16:18 > 0:16:19And across the line!
0:16:21 > 0:16:25- Actually, it looks quite good, doesn't it!- Am I right in saying,
0:16:25 > 0:16:28that would be the first ever convertible off-road car?
0:16:28 > 0:16:31Yeah, well, apart from the original Willys Jeep,
0:16:31 > 0:16:35the first Toyota Land Cruiser and the original Land Rover. Apart from that...
0:16:35 > 0:16:39Apart from the very origins, Genesis, the whole foundation, if you will,
0:16:39 > 0:16:40of the entire concept of the off-roader
0:16:40 > 0:16:44is founded upon a convertible.
0:16:44 > 0:16:47- Did I say that out loud? - You did and we all heard it.
0:16:47 > 0:16:52- That's a bit like saying they should make a song called Blue Suede Shoes. - Yes, they should do.
0:16:52 > 0:16:54There's a new car I want to tell you about.
0:16:54 > 0:16:58I'll flash it up on the screen for one second and I want you to tell me what it is.
0:16:58 > 0:17:00Are you ready? Here we go. And, on.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03And off. What was that?
0:17:03 > 0:17:06- Aston Martin.- You see, it wasn't.
0:17:06 > 0:17:10That, in fact, let's get it up again, that is the new Mondeo.
0:17:10 > 0:17:14- Is it? - Was it done by a Chinese person?
0:17:14 > 0:17:16LAUGHTER
0:17:16 > 0:17:19Let me explain because this is quite complicated.
0:17:19 > 0:17:22That's been launched in America already as the Ford Fusion.
0:17:22 > 0:17:25It's not coming to Britain until next year.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28So Ford in Britain, they're not admitting that is the new Mondeo
0:17:28 > 0:17:32because they think people won't continue to buy the current one for a year,
0:17:32 > 0:17:35but it is the new Mondeo and it's coming next year, so there.
0:17:35 > 0:17:39Now, if you're under 40, you may not remember
0:17:39 > 0:17:41a television show called The Sweeney.
0:17:41 > 0:17:44So, to fill you in, every week, it was a cop show in essence.
0:17:44 > 0:17:48Every week, the hero would have some casual sex with a lady.
0:17:48 > 0:17:51Then he'd punch a baddie in the middle of his face and then drive
0:17:51 > 0:17:55a Ford Granada very briskly across some waste ground in Saaf London.
0:17:55 > 0:17:58Now, the reason we bring this up is we heard
0:17:58 > 0:18:01the other day that they were making a film of this TV series
0:18:01 > 0:18:04starring Ray Winstone and Plan B.
0:18:04 > 0:18:06And this gave us an idea.
0:18:06 > 0:18:10For ages, we have wanted to make a proper movie car chase.
0:18:10 > 0:18:12We reckon we'd be pretty good at it.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15So we got in touch with the film's producers and we said,
0:18:15 > 0:18:18"There's bound to be a car chase in it so can Hammond and I
0:18:18 > 0:18:19"make it for you?"
0:18:19 > 0:18:22And they said yes!
0:18:25 > 0:18:31This being The Sweeney, the location was in the Saaf of England.
0:18:31 > 0:18:36And while the main crew were hard at work shooting shoot-outs...
0:18:36 > 0:18:39And people jumping off boats,
0:18:39 > 0:18:42Hammond and I were trying to decide what sort of car chase
0:18:42 > 0:18:43we wanted to make.
0:18:43 > 0:18:46And then there was the Bond film in Vietnam and it was just
0:18:46 > 0:18:49stupid stunt, after stupid stunt, all shot from a helicopter.
0:18:49 > 0:18:51So you never had a sense of speed.
0:18:51 > 0:18:55So you want to be close, so if a car does like a jump and a roll,
0:18:55 > 0:18:58you want to be up close and maybe see the driver's face,
0:18:58 > 0:19:00as if you were in the car?
0:19:00 > 0:19:05- No, there is no jump and roll.- There would be stunts, it is a car chase.
0:19:05 > 0:19:07No, no.
0:19:07 > 0:19:11Here is an idea. So, say, helicopter here. Car comes out.
0:19:11 > 0:19:13barrel roll happens. Bam! Boom!
0:19:13 > 0:19:16You want be back wide so you can see the helicopter.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19- We are not having any cars crashing into helicopters.- But...
0:19:19 > 0:19:24- No, we're not.- Why?- Because that's just stupid. This is the Sweeney.
0:19:24 > 0:19:29It's a real police chase. Honestly, just think. Ronin, Bullitt.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31The Italian Job, the original one.
0:19:31 > 0:19:34Good, gritty car chases because they're real.
0:19:34 > 0:19:38How many jumps where the car went "Whee!" were there in Ronin?
0:19:38 > 0:19:40But we need to drag The Sweeney into this century
0:19:40 > 0:19:42so we need cars going into helicopters.
0:19:42 > 0:19:46What are those drawings? What are those drawings?
0:19:46 > 0:19:50- Car going into helicopter. - We haven't got... What's that?!
0:19:50 > 0:19:52That is very clever.
0:19:52 > 0:19:55Right. Train going along. There isn't a carriage.
0:19:55 > 0:19:59- It's one of those flat ones. And he times his jump...- No, no, no.
0:19:59 > 0:20:01- No.- There's a chance...
0:20:01 > 0:20:03- 'Since we weren't getting anywhere...'- No!
0:20:03 > 0:20:06'..I went off to meet our actors.'
0:20:08 > 0:20:11- I want to shoot 'em. - No, you've shot four already.
0:20:11 > 0:20:13- Shoot them together.- Hello.
0:20:13 > 0:20:19Actors, hi. My name's Richard. I'm, I'm, the director, I suppose.
0:20:19 > 0:20:22- And, um, so, you're Plan B? - I'm Plan B, nice to meet you.
0:20:22 > 0:20:24- Can I call you Plan? - Yeah, if you want.
0:20:24 > 0:20:29And, over here, of course, morning. Delighted to meet you.
0:20:29 > 0:20:31Hello, mate.
0:20:31 > 0:20:33It's an honour to work with you, really.
0:20:33 > 0:20:35When are you working with us?
0:20:35 > 0:20:37Later on today we are going to be doing some stunt work.
0:20:37 > 0:20:41You'll be able to handle it, the variety of stuff you've done.
0:20:41 > 0:20:43We're a bit busy in here at the minute.
0:20:43 > 0:20:47- Can you go and rabbit somewhere else?- I know you are busy, that's great. It'll be mega!
0:20:47 > 0:20:50And you're going to handle all of it so well.
0:20:50 > 0:20:54What am I going to handle well? What are you talking about?
0:20:54 > 0:20:59The Long Good Friday. Grit, anger in there. The Long Good Friday. Anger.
0:20:59 > 0:21:03- And the same career, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?- No, that's not him.
0:21:03 > 0:21:06No, I'm not Bob Hoskins, mate.
0:21:08 > 0:21:12Whilst Hammond was making friends with the stars,
0:21:12 > 0:21:16I was making the cars that the film's producers had chosen.
0:21:17 > 0:21:20The baddies would be using a Jaguar XFR.
0:21:21 > 0:21:24And the goodies, a Ford Focus ST.
0:21:27 > 0:21:29And straight away, there's a problem.
0:21:29 > 0:21:33Because anyone who knows anything about cars will watch this film
0:21:33 > 0:21:36and say, "There's no way that a Ford Focus
0:21:36 > 0:21:40"can keep up with a supercharged 500-horsepower V8 Jag."
0:21:40 > 0:21:42The speed difference,
0:21:42 > 0:21:47as I shall now demonstrate on our closed piece of road, is...
0:21:47 > 0:21:48immense.
0:21:50 > 0:21:52ENGINE ROARS
0:22:02 > 0:22:05To make matters worse, this isn't an ST.
0:22:09 > 0:22:14It's a 1.6-litre eco boost with ST badges,
0:22:14 > 0:22:18ST wheels and look, fake dials on the dashboard.
0:22:25 > 0:22:29I decided to put these concerns to the film's director, Nick Love.
0:22:29 > 0:22:33The problem you've got is a Ford Focus cannot keep up with a Jag.
0:22:33 > 0:22:37- It's about the skill of the driver, not the car. - It's a story being told.
0:22:37 > 0:22:42- No.- If Regan is a good driver, he can keep up with anybody.- You can't.
0:22:42 > 0:22:46- You can in my film.- You can't, because we are directing this.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49You're going to have to get faster cars than the Focus.
0:22:49 > 0:22:52We have a very restricted amount of money and we can't...
0:22:52 > 0:22:56- What are we going to do, buy Ferraris?- What's the budget?
0:22:56 > 0:22:58- Of the film?- Yes. - Three million quid.- Whoa!
0:22:58 > 0:23:02- What, for just this film? Three million.- That's nothing.
0:23:02 > 0:23:07Let's put them in Veyrons, Bugatti. You could get two for that.
0:23:07 > 0:23:10Could you also explain to him, we're trying to keep it real.
0:23:10 > 0:23:16- He wants to do this thing where it jumps over a train.- The idea is, get this...- That's bollocks.
0:23:16 > 0:23:18A train comes along and when it comes through,
0:23:18 > 0:23:21your man's there in his car and he times it...
0:23:21 > 0:23:25- jumps through the gap. That's real.- Brilliant.
0:23:25 > 0:23:27We're going to need something faster than the Focus.
0:23:27 > 0:23:32No, we're just going to think big in terms of action. This is a motorway bridge.
0:23:32 > 0:23:35You know, where they haven't finished building, but look,
0:23:35 > 0:23:39- it's beginning to twist and that's a helicopter.- I'm getting a migraine.
0:23:39 > 0:23:41- You are talking- BLEEP, - the pair of you.
0:23:41 > 0:23:44You want to do a commercial and you want a film that no-one will believe.
0:23:44 > 0:23:48If you're going to do it, do it properly, that's all I'm saying.
0:23:49 > 0:23:53Having got the distinct impression that I couldn't change the cars,
0:23:53 > 0:23:55I had to get creative.
0:23:55 > 0:24:00Sorry about this, mate. We have the baddie.
0:24:00 > 0:24:06So, the front-wheel drive Ford would be driven by former rally champion Mark Higgins,
0:24:06 > 0:24:11and the rear-drive Jag by drifting world champion Mauro Calo.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14OK. Three, two, one, to catch up, go.
0:24:16 > 0:24:18And to get round the speed difference,
0:24:18 > 0:24:22I'd created a scene in which the Jag is held up by traffic.
0:24:24 > 0:24:26HORN BLARES
0:24:26 > 0:24:30And three, two, one, hit.
0:24:32 > 0:24:34Try again, try again, try again.
0:24:36 > 0:24:38Whoa!
0:24:38 > 0:24:39Yes!
0:24:41 > 0:24:43Man alive, are we getting some shots here!
0:24:47 > 0:24:50Whilst Jeremy was lost in the land of reality,
0:24:50 > 0:24:53I was at the location for the climax of the chase,
0:24:53 > 0:24:58a deserted caravan park, where I was setting up a dramatic jump.
0:24:58 > 0:25:01You're all right, you're all right.
0:25:01 > 0:25:05Oh, yeah. And hold it there, that's perfect.
0:25:05 > 0:25:08I come racing up that field. Between those two posts
0:25:08 > 0:25:11there'll be a barrier and I smash through it. That's some drama.
0:25:11 > 0:25:12Up the ramp, I get air.
0:25:12 > 0:25:16There, past the caravans and land on the grass.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18With the ramp hidden from the cameras,
0:25:18 > 0:25:21I nicked one of the back-up Focuses and was ready to go.
0:25:21 > 0:25:24I'd love it if they use the actual shot with me doing it.
0:25:24 > 0:25:26That would be brilliant. I'd be in the film.
0:25:26 > 0:25:30First off, drive through the gate post.
0:25:32 > 0:25:34And now, get me some air!
0:25:37 > 0:25:41Yeah! That felt good, that felt like we had air and everything.
0:25:41 > 0:25:44However, when I watched it back on the monitor...
0:25:46 > 0:25:48Play it again.
0:25:50 > 0:25:51This is rubbish.
0:25:54 > 0:25:58Meanwhile, I was now filming the cars from the front,
0:25:58 > 0:26:02which meant my drivers had to be made to look exactly like the main actors.
0:26:02 > 0:26:05What's going to happen is your alongside him.
0:26:05 > 0:26:08You're going exactly the same speed. When he's ready to make this turn,
0:26:08 > 0:26:12you're not ready to make this turn, you think he's going on down there.
0:26:12 > 0:26:15He's going to lock up, which causes your handbrake turn
0:26:15 > 0:26:16but we'll get that in a minute.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21I then disconnected the Jag's anti-lock brakes so it would lock up
0:26:21 > 0:26:25in a cloud of tyre smoke and then we went for a take.
0:26:25 > 0:26:27OK, we're ready.
0:26:28 > 0:26:31Mark, less moving around, less moving.
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Yes, that's good.
0:26:37 > 0:26:38Oh!
0:26:40 > 0:26:42TYRES SQUEAL
0:26:43 > 0:26:45Ooh!
0:26:45 > 0:26:48I may have to go to the lavatory for a little while.
0:26:48 > 0:26:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:53 > 0:26:56- What?- Hold on a minute.
0:26:56 > 0:27:00How the hell could you not know who Ray Winstone is?
0:27:00 > 0:27:05Think that it - middle-aged, Cockney actor, it's just Bob Hoskins, isn't it? It just is.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08And that bit with the car when you drove them together,
0:27:08 > 0:27:11- that was just wanton destruction? - No, it wasn't.
0:27:11 > 0:27:14We had three Jags. And five Ford Focuses.
0:27:14 > 0:27:18And remember, we had £3 million to play with.
0:27:18 > 0:27:19No, we didn't have three million quid
0:27:19 > 0:27:22but we were allowed to do light damage. We really were.
0:27:22 > 0:27:24Anyway, we'll pick that up later on.
0:27:24 > 0:27:29Now, it is time to put a star in our reasonably priced car.
0:27:29 > 0:27:31Over the years, we've had many guests on this programme.
0:27:31 > 0:27:34All different sorts. Men, women,
0:27:34 > 0:27:36Americans, Germans.
0:27:36 > 0:27:37A lesbian.
0:27:37 > 0:27:39LAUGHTER
0:27:39 > 0:27:41We've never had a Canadian, though.
0:27:41 > 0:27:44That, however, is ABOOT to change.
0:27:44 > 0:27:47Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Ryan Reynolds!
0:27:47 > 0:27:50CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:27:52 > 0:27:54- How are you? - I'm very well, how are you?
0:27:54 > 0:27:55I'm very well, thank you.
0:27:55 > 0:27:57Hi, everybody. Hello, hello.
0:27:59 > 0:28:01- Hello!- Have a seat.
0:28:01 > 0:28:04- I'd love to.- Have a seat.
0:28:04 > 0:28:07- It's like looking in a mirror! - It really is!
0:28:07 > 0:28:09- It really is!- Not for you!
0:28:09 > 0:28:13So, 2010, you were voted the sexiest man alive.
0:28:13 > 0:28:16AUDIENCE: Woo!
0:28:16 > 0:28:17That was 2010, though!
0:28:17 > 0:28:20I'm on the lecture circuit now!
0:28:20 > 0:28:22I was just thinking, your schooldays,
0:28:22 > 0:28:26were they just a blizzard of snogging and smooth moves?
0:28:26 > 0:28:31No, it wasn't that. I was a bit of a little pariah at school.
0:28:31 > 0:28:33I have three older brothers,
0:28:33 > 0:28:35all of whom were kicked out of this very same school,
0:28:35 > 0:28:38so from the moment I got there, I was a marked man.
0:28:38 > 0:28:39What were they kicked out for?
0:28:39 > 0:28:42Just random things. Just mostly drugs and violence.
0:28:42 > 0:28:44OK!
0:28:44 > 0:28:48And I was kicked out for something I think you'd appreciate.
0:28:48 > 0:28:50I was kicked out for stealing a car.
0:28:50 > 0:28:54- Stealing a car?- But wait, I didn't actually steal a vehicle.
0:28:54 > 0:28:59What we did was, a teacher that we had was just 100% awful,
0:28:59 > 0:29:02he had this little car, one of those little Volkswagens,
0:29:02 > 0:29:06and so my friends and I just played an April Fools' prank on him.
0:29:06 > 0:29:09We picked it up, we lifted it up and carried it down the block,
0:29:09 > 0:29:10about eight of us.
0:29:10 > 0:29:14We talked about this last week. The best fun you can have with a little car is pick it up
0:29:14 > 0:29:18- and turn it round so it's facing the other way...- Fun practical joke.
0:29:18 > 0:29:19That's a better idea,
0:29:19 > 0:29:23because in Canada, if you move it more than ten feet, it's a felony.
0:29:23 > 0:29:25I didn't know that.
0:29:25 > 0:29:27So you moved a car more than ten feet
0:29:27 > 0:29:29and then that was grand theft auto?
0:29:29 > 0:29:31Yeah, one city block was, yeah, 100% grand theft.
0:29:31 > 0:29:35Now, obviously, sexiest man alive, 2010,
0:29:35 > 0:29:38but reading through your notes, also clumsiest man alive.
0:29:38 > 0:29:41Mmm. Oh, definitely, yeah.
0:29:41 > 0:29:44There's a thing... Zurich, Switzerland -
0:29:44 > 0:29:46it is impossible to hurt yourself in Zurich.
0:29:46 > 0:29:49You go there, you eat cheese and then you come home.
0:29:49 > 0:29:53- So, how did you manage to hurt yourself?- I jumped off a bridge.
0:29:53 > 0:29:55But there was water below.
0:29:55 > 0:29:58And I dove in and I broke a vertebrae by diving in.
0:29:58 > 0:30:00AUDIENC GROANS
0:30:00 > 0:30:03- You've also been run over? - I have been run over, yeah.
0:30:03 > 0:30:06I was 19 years old, I was in Vancouver and I was at a bar,
0:30:06 > 0:30:10I had a few drinks, I'd left my car and I decided to walk home.
0:30:10 > 0:30:11- Being responsible.- Exactly.
0:30:11 > 0:30:15And I was crossing the street, it was about two in the morning
0:30:15 > 0:30:17and I was hit by a drunk driver.
0:30:18 > 0:30:20LAUGHTER
0:30:20 > 0:30:24I always wondered if he tells people that he got hit by a drunk pedestrian.
0:30:24 > 0:30:25LAUGHTER
0:30:25 > 0:30:26- I would.- So did that hurt?
0:30:26 > 0:30:28Yeah, that was bad. I broke a lot of bones.
0:30:28 > 0:30:31That was all the left side of my body I broke.
0:30:31 > 0:30:34But I was 19, so at that point, you're just made of rubber and magic.
0:30:34 > 0:30:36LAUGHTER
0:30:36 > 0:30:40- You healed?- Yeah.- Bearing in mind you can't jump off a bridge without breaking your back,
0:30:40 > 0:30:44was skydiving the perfect hobby to take up?
0:30:44 > 0:30:46God, you're like my mother!
0:30:46 > 0:30:49- LAUGHTER - Old enough!- Just killing me!
0:30:49 > 0:30:52My friends were trying to get their licence,
0:30:52 > 0:30:55so I decided I would get my licence, skydiving,
0:30:55 > 0:31:01and I did 12 jumps, which were all highly successful!
0:31:01 > 0:31:03And then it was 13!
0:31:03 > 0:31:07And the 13th one, I had a problem, where the chute didn't open,
0:31:07 > 0:31:09and I had to pull the reserve.
0:31:09 > 0:31:12But the weird thing is, when you're in a situation like that,
0:31:12 > 0:31:15you're flying down at 120 miles per hour,
0:31:15 > 0:31:16and when your chute doesn't open,
0:31:16 > 0:31:19you seriously have to think about pulling the other one.
0:31:19 > 0:31:22That's the weird thing. Time slows down and you're thinking,
0:31:22 > 0:31:25"If I pull the other one, then I'll have none left."
0:31:25 > 0:31:26LAUGHTER
0:31:28 > 0:31:31"So, I'm just going to wait to see if something happens."
0:31:31 > 0:31:35And sure enough, at the last minute, I pulled the reserve chute,
0:31:35 > 0:31:37which you can't steer, and I ended up landing in a field
0:31:37 > 0:31:41which contained only a dead horse. I don't know what omen that is.
0:31:41 > 0:31:44Usually, it's a black crow that tells you you're going to die,
0:31:44 > 0:31:47but I just landed next to a dead horse.
0:31:47 > 0:31:50- You have a new film out, Safe House. - I do, yeah.
0:31:50 > 0:31:53- So when's the movie out?- The film is out February 24th here in the UK.
0:31:53 > 0:31:56We have a clip of that, which we're going to show for you now.
0:31:56 > 0:31:58Let's have a look.
0:32:01 > 0:32:03TYRES SQUEAL
0:32:28 > 0:32:29APPLAUSE
0:32:29 > 0:32:32That's a good crash!
0:32:32 > 0:32:34It was a good crash!
0:32:37 > 0:32:40- That's Denzel Washington. - Yes, backseat driving right there!
0:32:40 > 0:32:42- Elbowing you in the face!- Yeah.
0:32:42 > 0:32:46So what is it about? Give us the plot, give us the story.
0:32:46 > 0:32:50I play a guy who's what's called a safe house operator, a housekeeper.
0:32:50 > 0:32:54There are CIA-owned apartments and flats all around the world,
0:32:54 > 0:32:57and they're run by usually a low-level CIA guy.
0:32:57 > 0:33:00And then, one day, in walks Denzel Washington's character,
0:33:00 > 0:33:03who's probably one of the world's worst murdering,
0:33:03 > 0:33:06sociopathic Hannibal Lecter types.
0:33:06 > 0:33:08And I'm left to deal with this guy,
0:33:08 > 0:33:11who I'm deeply ill-equipped to deal with.
0:33:11 > 0:33:16- So it's not like The Devil Wears Prada, then?- No!
0:33:16 > 0:33:17It's not The Proposal II.
0:33:17 > 0:33:20- It's not a romcom.- No, that's good.
0:33:20 > 0:33:24- Can I just say that God is normally quite fair...- Yeah.
0:33:24 > 0:33:27..with his dishing-out of talents. For instance, David Beckham,
0:33:27 > 0:33:29he's said, "He's going to be very good-looking,
0:33:29 > 0:33:31"talented footballer,
0:33:31 > 0:33:35"and to balance that up, I'll give him a squeaky voice."
0:33:35 > 0:33:38You're funny and good-looking and not fat...
0:33:40 > 0:33:42..where's your squeaky voice?
0:33:42 > 0:33:44- What's my...?- Have you got BO?
0:33:44 > 0:33:48- Have I got 41 nipples? - Have you got very tiny testes?
0:33:48 > 0:33:51It's like Braille down there, Jeremy.
0:33:51 > 0:33:53LAUGHTER
0:33:55 > 0:33:58- A very short novel. - That's what it is - Braille.
0:33:58 > 0:33:59Yeah, the whole system.
0:34:00 > 0:34:03Everybody has... I have a lot of things wrong.
0:34:03 > 0:34:05I'm blind, I'm deaf,
0:34:05 > 0:34:08I've got no sense of smell cos I have a cold,
0:34:08 > 0:34:10which I haven't mentioned.
0:34:10 > 0:34:13Thank you for the tongue kiss earlier.
0:34:13 > 0:34:15LAUGHTER
0:34:15 > 0:34:18Just went deep with it, too!
0:34:19 > 0:34:22No, we all have crazy faults.
0:34:22 > 0:34:25My fault isn't something horrendous, like,
0:34:25 > 0:34:27"I can't stop murdering children."
0:34:27 > 0:34:30- LAUGHTER - I just can't stop.
0:34:30 > 0:34:33I like to think I'm a horrible driver...
0:34:33 > 0:34:35Horrible or bad?
0:34:35 > 0:34:38I ride motorcycles everywhere, so you can race up through traffic,
0:34:38 > 0:34:43it's bumper to bumper, and when your oncoming traffic is stopped, you just go right up the middle.
0:34:43 > 0:34:46But I have this tendency when I am in a vehicle to think
0:34:46 > 0:34:49I can slip that entire vehicle right up the middle.
0:34:49 > 0:34:52And it's only at the last second when I'm hitting the brakes, coming to a halt.
0:34:52 > 0:34:56- You remember you're in a car. You like bikes? - I like bikes a lot, yeah.
0:34:56 > 0:34:57What sort of bikes?
0:34:57 > 0:35:02I have an old Paul Smart Ducati, which is a nice little bike.
0:35:02 > 0:35:03I know what a Ducati is!
0:35:03 > 0:35:07- Yeah, Ducati. I have a Deus. - Is it "Deuce" or "Day-us"?
0:35:07 > 0:35:08- "Day-us", yeah.- It's D-E-U-S?
0:35:08 > 0:35:10That's how we pronounce it,
0:35:10 > 0:35:14but you guys say "Niss-un", so I have no idea what's happening.
0:35:14 > 0:35:16Every car's pronounced differently in America.
0:35:16 > 0:35:20The Hyundai's a "Hundee". "Nee-sun, Vee-dub-ya, Jag-war.
0:35:20 > 0:35:21"Bee-em-dub-ya."
0:35:21 > 0:35:23Here, what is it, "Jag-yur"?
0:35:23 > 0:35:26- "Jag-yoo-ar." How it's spelt.- Yeah.
0:35:26 > 0:35:28LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:35:30 > 0:35:32No, I'm sorry, that was mean of me!
0:35:35 > 0:35:37Now, you came down here to obviously
0:35:37 > 0:35:40try your hand in the Kia Cee-apostrophe-d.
0:35:40 > 0:35:41What was your goal?
0:35:41 > 0:35:45My goal was just to see if I could drive a manual car.
0:35:45 > 0:35:48I haven't done that since high school, so that was interesting.
0:35:48 > 0:35:50- Really?- Yeah.
0:35:50 > 0:35:53- Who'd like to see Ryan's lap? - Oh, boy.- AUDIENCE: Yeah!
0:35:53 > 0:35:54Play the tape!
0:35:57 > 0:35:59'Aggressive start. Crisp day.'
0:35:59 > 0:36:02That smells exactly like clutch.
0:36:02 > 0:36:04'Smells like clutch?
0:36:04 > 0:36:06- 'Clutch does smell like clutch.' - 'Does smell bad, yeah.'
0:36:06 > 0:36:09'Annoying thing. The wide Formula 1 line in there.'
0:36:09 > 0:36:12'I'm a big guy, I make that whole car look like a children's toy.'
0:36:12 > 0:36:16- 'You should see me in it.'- 'Looks like a sweater, made of metal.'
0:36:16 > 0:36:19LAUGHTER
0:36:19 > 0:36:21'Every time I shift, I make a dumb face.'
0:36:22 > 0:36:24- 'That's wide, that's really wide.'- 'Terrible.'
0:36:24 > 0:36:27'No, it could give you a fast... Where are you going?'
0:36:27 > 0:36:29- BLEEP! BLEEP- manual!- BLEEP!
0:36:29 > 0:36:31'Yeah! There! Right?'
0:36:32 > 0:36:35'The beep machine has obviously blown up...
0:36:35 > 0:36:39'Now, keeping it tidy through the lines there. Yes, pretty good.
0:36:39 > 0:36:41'Very good, actually.'
0:36:41 > 0:36:42Very good.
0:36:42 > 0:36:46'Are we going to be able to find fourth?'
0:36:46 > 0:36:50Turn from hell coming up.
0:36:50 > 0:36:52'Oh, yeah, this turn, not fun every time.'
0:36:52 > 0:36:54- 'That's almost beautiful.'- 'Yeah.
0:36:54 > 0:36:56'That's what I call the adult diaper.'
0:36:56 > 0:36:58'Whoa, that's cutting that one!
0:36:58 > 0:37:01- 'That's quite uncomfortable at that speed.'- 'Yeah.'
0:37:01 > 0:37:06'Look at it gripping. That's nicely done. Not too cheaty on the cutting.
0:37:06 > 0:37:08'And around Gambon.'
0:37:08 > 0:37:11- There we are, ladies and gentlemen, across the line!- There we go!
0:37:11 > 0:37:13CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:37:13 > 0:37:15Wow!
0:37:15 > 0:37:17So...
0:37:17 > 0:37:21Where would you like to appear on the board?
0:37:21 > 0:37:23I'm going to say somewhere in the middle.
0:37:23 > 0:37:27Didn't you... Actually, I know you did, cos you told our researchers,
0:37:27 > 0:37:30you were desperate, cos you went back out...
0:37:30 > 0:37:32- "Do you mind if I have another go?" - "Give me another shot."
0:37:32 > 0:37:35Cos you wanted to beat Tom Cruise.
0:37:35 > 0:37:40Yeah, I did want to beat Tom Cruise. I wasn't talking about the driving, though.
0:37:40 > 0:37:41LAUGHTER
0:37:43 > 0:37:46Yes, I'm going to guess that I have 1:45.
0:37:46 > 0:37:49- 1:45?- And that's being really generous.
0:37:49 > 0:37:52- You did a one...- Ugh!
0:37:53 > 0:37:55- This is terrible.- ..forty...
0:37:55 > 0:37:57OK, there's a four.
0:37:57 > 0:37:59- ..three...- Oh!
0:37:59 > 0:38:01AUDIENCE: Ooh!
0:38:01 > 0:38:03..point seven. You beat Tom Cruise!
0:38:03 > 0:38:05You're a faster driver!
0:38:05 > 0:38:08Wow!
0:38:08 > 0:38:10CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:38:10 > 0:38:11Wow! All right!
0:38:12 > 0:38:16- Congratulations.- Give me that cold!
0:38:17 > 0:38:18Take that back!
0:38:21 > 0:38:22This is...
0:38:24 > 0:38:28Wow, that's worth getting your pneumonia for!
0:38:28 > 0:38:29I love that!
0:38:29 > 0:38:32Life just gets worse.
0:38:33 > 0:38:37You look like that and you're funny and you're a film star
0:38:37 > 0:38:39and you can drive.
0:38:40 > 0:38:42Yeah, but I break every bone in my body
0:38:42 > 0:38:46almost with the cycle of each moon, so don't worry.
0:38:46 > 0:38:48I'll hurt myself on the way out.
0:38:48 > 0:38:50Well, it's been a pleasure to meet you,
0:38:50 > 0:38:54- and a pleasure for those girls to stand so close to you.- Thank you!
0:38:54 > 0:38:56Ladies and gentlemen, Ryan Reynolds!
0:38:56 > 0:38:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:39:05 > 0:39:09Now, tonight, Jeremy and I are having a go at making a car chase
0:39:09 > 0:39:10for the new Sweeney movie,
0:39:10 > 0:39:14and so far, well, there have been a few disagreements.
0:39:14 > 0:39:18Jeremy wants the action to be "realistic", which means "boring".
0:39:18 > 0:39:22I want it to be exciting, full of stunts and massive explosions.
0:39:22 > 0:39:23It's a film!
0:39:25 > 0:39:29What we've done now is we've reconnected the ABS,
0:39:29 > 0:39:31the electronic differential is now working,
0:39:31 > 0:39:35so he should be able to do a power slide through there.
0:39:35 > 0:39:38Yeah. Okey doke, here we go. Three, two, one, hit it.
0:39:44 > 0:39:46Yes, yes!
0:39:46 > 0:39:49'Whilst Jeremy was faffing around with his anti-lock brakes,
0:39:49 > 0:39:51'I'd raided The Sweeney's budget
0:39:51 > 0:39:54'and come up with a way of getting the car to jump properly.'
0:39:54 > 0:39:56It's an air cannon.
0:39:56 > 0:39:58What it does is, car mounted up on the cannon there,
0:39:58 > 0:40:02it charges with a huge compressor there - it's actually nitrogen -
0:40:02 > 0:40:06and it fires the car out over that way, so you get big air.
0:40:06 > 0:40:09Jeremy said about keeping it real - well, check this out.
0:40:09 > 0:40:14Up there. So often when you see a car jump in a film, you realise the engine's gone.
0:40:14 > 0:40:16Not this time - I've left it in.
0:40:16 > 0:40:18Three million quid - what's an engine?
0:40:18 > 0:40:22'With the cannon primed, we were ready for lift-off.'
0:40:22 > 0:40:24OK, three, two, one!
0:40:34 > 0:40:36That's the jump!
0:40:36 > 0:40:37Yes!
0:40:37 > 0:40:41'Mr Picky, however, wasn't so impressed.'
0:40:41 > 0:40:44- Have you ever heard the word "continuity"?- Yes.
0:40:44 > 0:40:46Here is your car.
0:40:47 > 0:40:50- Yes.- Right, the next shot is what?
0:40:50 > 0:40:51The next shot is...
0:40:51 > 0:40:56Ah, no, this is where there'll be another car driving away.
0:40:56 > 0:40:59No, we see it land on its roof...
0:41:00 > 0:41:05..and then we're expected to believe that somehow it's still driveable?
0:41:05 > 0:41:07This is the movies, that's what happens.
0:41:07 > 0:41:11Did you never watch...CHiPs? Remember that?
0:41:11 > 0:41:14They'd ride along, one minute you've got a man on a Harley
0:41:14 > 0:41:17approaching the back of a lorry with its tailgate down,
0:41:17 > 0:41:19then he's done a massive jump, briefly he's on a dirt bike,
0:41:19 > 0:41:22then he lands, he's back on the Harley again.
0:41:22 > 0:41:24- That's rubbish.- That's the movies! We all expect that!
0:41:24 > 0:41:28This car will never work! It's not plausible!
0:41:28 > 0:41:31You can't edit your way out of that!
0:41:31 > 0:41:35Just let me get in the edit suite and work some magic.
0:41:35 > 0:41:37You won't believe it.
0:41:40 > 0:41:43'First, though, I needed some close-up shots of the actors,
0:41:43 > 0:41:45'which I would then cut into the scene
0:41:45 > 0:41:48'where the car flies through the air.'
0:41:48 > 0:41:51- Does Nick know about this?- Yeah, yeah, bang on.- Are you sure?- Yeah.
0:41:51 > 0:41:57'Because we'd got off to a bad start, I was keen to demonstrate they were in good hands.'
0:41:57 > 0:42:00You're going to be in the air, and at that point,
0:42:00 > 0:42:05if you'd both give me excitement - you're in a chase - elation -
0:42:05 > 0:42:08you're in the air - but I want to see determination as well.
0:42:08 > 0:42:13You're in a chase, mixed with vengeful, righteous fury.
0:42:13 > 0:42:15So there's so many emotions going on in this split second,
0:42:15 > 0:42:18there's so many emotions you're going to have to feel.
0:42:18 > 0:42:20- Let's start with nothing, OK?- OK.
0:42:20 > 0:42:22That's a blank canvas. As you hit the ramp...
0:42:22 > 0:42:26Richard, I don't feel like you're giving me enough direction.
0:42:26 > 0:42:29- You're giving it all to him. What about me?- Ben, blank again for me.
0:42:29 > 0:42:32- Blank.- You're throwing a hissy now, ain't you?
0:42:32 > 0:42:35Let's blank it and let's start...
0:42:35 > 0:42:40OK, remember, elation, excitement, vengeful fury and fear.
0:42:40 > 0:42:42So, vengeful fury comes before fear?
0:42:42 > 0:42:45- At the same time. - What am I frightened of, though?
0:42:45 > 0:42:46It's already happened, ain't it?
0:42:46 > 0:42:48I wouldn't be frightened after the event.
0:42:48 > 0:42:51- Wouldn't I be frightened when I'm in the air?- We're in the air.
0:42:51 > 0:42:56- Oh, them four emotions take place in the air?- Yeah.
0:42:56 > 0:43:00- You're in the air for a while. - It'll be a long while, won't it?
0:43:00 > 0:43:01It's a big jump.
0:43:01 > 0:43:03And just one last thing - we have to land.
0:43:03 > 0:43:07I'm going to say, "Forwards," and you go forwards, I'm going say,
0:43:07 > 0:43:09"Backwards..." Forwards, backwards, and away.
0:43:09 > 0:43:12Forwards, backwards, forwards and away,
0:43:12 > 0:43:15or backwards, forwards, backwards?
0:43:15 > 0:43:19No, it's forwards, you land forwards, backwards,
0:43:19 > 0:43:21forwards, backwards, then drive away.
0:43:21 > 0:43:23I thought there had to be another backwards.
0:43:23 > 0:43:25- Oh, I'm confused.- Don't forget,
0:43:25 > 0:43:30I want to catch just a whispering trace of those emotions from the sky.
0:43:30 > 0:43:32They're dissipating as you land...
0:43:32 > 0:43:35- Oh, don't he go on!- BLEEP- sake.
0:43:36 > 0:43:39'While Richard Ford Coppola was with the stars,
0:43:39 > 0:43:42'I was trying to make the angry director
0:43:42 > 0:43:47'understand the problems of driving a big Jag around a caravan park.'
0:43:47 > 0:43:52I have to slide this car on grass, and the problem is,
0:43:52 > 0:43:56the traction control is on, so it's not letting me slide.
0:43:56 > 0:43:58Foot hard down.
0:43:58 > 0:44:00Hard down, and it won't slide.
0:44:03 > 0:44:06That is the traction control on.
0:44:06 > 0:44:08- Can I just say, that was- BLEEP.
0:44:08 > 0:44:10Do you want to see it with traction control off?
0:44:10 > 0:44:11- Yeah.- OK.
0:44:11 > 0:44:13- Now watch this.- OK.
0:44:16 > 0:44:19Get the power on, feel the tail go.
0:44:20 > 0:44:21Hold that slide.
0:44:25 > 0:44:27That is what we need.
0:44:27 > 0:44:31Which do you prefer, traction control on or off?
0:44:31 > 0:44:32- Off.- Off?
0:44:32 > 0:44:35- Yes.- That means you're going to have to have a line of dialogue
0:44:35 > 0:44:38where one of them says, "Turn the traction control off."
0:44:40 > 0:44:43- Not in my film, no.- You're going to have to. It's ten seconds to do it.
0:44:43 > 0:44:45You have to hold it down for ten seconds.
0:44:45 > 0:44:48Anyone who's got a Jag watching the film will go, "You can't do that."
0:44:48 > 0:44:51- It doesn't matter. It's not a- BLEEP- film for Jag watchers.
0:44:51 > 0:44:53It's a film for everyone to go to the cinema.
0:44:53 > 0:44:56Why doesn't he say, "Why do they make it ten seconds?"
0:44:56 > 0:44:58- He can say that. - No! Cos it kills the...
0:44:58 > 0:45:01- WALKIE TALKIE BEEPS - Oh,- BLEEP- off. It kills the tension!
0:45:01 > 0:45:03I want a film that connects to a wide audience.
0:45:03 > 0:45:06- I know, but... - Can I finish? Can I just speak?
0:45:06 > 0:45:1090 minutes into the film is the main car chase.
0:45:10 > 0:45:12- You can't have someone pressing a- BLEEP- button.
0:45:12 > 0:45:16- What are you going to do, a close-up of a button?- Yeah.
0:45:16 > 0:45:18You're not putting that in my film.
0:45:18 > 0:45:21I like the traction control off, I don't want all bollocks
0:45:21 > 0:45:23about what it does and what it doesn't do.
0:45:23 > 0:45:26You said you wanted me to do something real.
0:45:26 > 0:45:27I'm doing something real.
0:45:27 > 0:45:30- Actually, you know what you should do -- BLEEP- off.
0:45:34 > 0:45:38'This altercation meant the director was not in the best of moods
0:45:38 > 0:45:41'when he went to have a look at an edit of Richard's big jump.'
0:45:41 > 0:45:43Right, look. This is still work in progress,
0:45:43 > 0:45:45but I have begun the polishing process,
0:45:45 > 0:45:48and I've worked on the sound. OK.
0:45:48 > 0:45:49Enjoy.
0:45:54 > 0:45:57TYRES SCREECH LOUDLY
0:45:57 > 0:46:01ENGINE REVS LOUDLY
0:46:03 > 0:46:04EXPLOSION
0:46:06 > 0:46:08BLEEP!
0:46:14 > 0:46:16TYRES SCREECH
0:46:19 > 0:46:21It's all there, isn't it?
0:46:27 > 0:46:30OK, what I've done here is I've set up a practice area
0:46:30 > 0:46:31for the next stunt,
0:46:31 > 0:46:36so I don't leave tyre marks in the grass at the actual location,
0:46:36 > 0:46:37which is over there.
0:46:37 > 0:46:39DISTANT SHOUTS
0:46:41 > 0:46:46Well, I guess we were wondering how the world's angriest man
0:46:46 > 0:46:50would respond to Hammond's car jump, and now we know.
0:46:50 > 0:46:54- Come here, you- BLEEP!- Little- BLEEP! - I'll kill you!
0:46:57 > 0:47:00'Because the director was busy hurting Richard
0:47:00 > 0:47:02'for writing off one of the Fords,
0:47:02 > 0:47:05'I seized the opportunity to give the baddies their new dialogue.'
0:47:05 > 0:47:08- You're driving, aren't you?- Yes.
0:47:08 > 0:47:10I need you to say, "Turn off the ABS."
0:47:10 > 0:47:14You say, "How?" And you say, "Pull the rhythm."
0:47:14 > 0:47:17- How do you say that in Serbian?- What?
0:47:17 > 0:47:19How do you say it in Serbian? I'm Serbian.
0:47:19 > 0:47:21- You're Serbian?- Yeah.
0:47:21 > 0:47:24- Have a look.- I've written this all in rhyming slang.
0:47:24 > 0:47:26Rhythm and blues - fuse.
0:47:26 > 0:47:29- Or you could say "Rodney". - No, he's a Serb.
0:47:29 > 0:47:32But he'll have learned his English, won't you, in London.
0:47:32 > 0:47:34He's only been here a day.
0:47:34 > 0:47:37- Rhythm. Do it with a Borat accent. - AS BORAT:- Pull the Rodney.
0:47:37 > 0:47:39- AS BORAT:- Pull the Rodney.- Yes!
0:47:39 > 0:47:42- AS BORAT:- Pull the Rodney. Rodney Bewes, fuse.
0:47:42 > 0:47:43- Similarly...- Go on.
0:47:43 > 0:47:47- You go, "How many horsepower has that Ford got?"- OK, right.
0:47:47 > 0:47:53"250." It hasn't actually, really, but don't let that bother you.
0:47:53 > 0:47:56"250." "God, Plod must be Robin."
0:47:56 > 0:47:59Robin Hood.
0:47:59 > 0:48:02"God, Plod must be Robin." Cos they're keeping up with you.
0:48:02 > 0:48:04- God, Plod must be Robin.- Yeah?
0:48:04 > 0:48:06"We've got 503."
0:48:06 > 0:48:08Now, this is the critical bit.
0:48:08 > 0:48:10When you're in the caravan site, you...
0:48:10 > 0:48:13- AS BORAT:- Turn off the traction control!
0:48:13 > 0:48:16- AS BORAT:- Turn off the traction control!- Love it.
0:48:16 > 0:48:18"'Ow. 'Ow. 'Ow do I do that? Whatever you want."
0:48:18 > 0:48:22- Oh, "'Ow," you mean? "'Ow." AS BORAT:- Push the Len.
0:48:23 > 0:48:26- AS BORAT:- Push the Len.- Push the Len. It's Len Hutton.
0:48:26 > 0:48:30- Was he a cricketer or a trade-union leader?- Trade-union leader.
0:48:30 > 0:48:31- Was he?- No, he was a cricketer.
0:48:31 > 0:48:34- Whatever he was, it's Len. - AS BORAT:- Push the Len.
0:48:34 > 0:48:37And then, this is the complicated bit
0:48:37 > 0:48:39that we really do need to get in.
0:48:39 > 0:48:42- AS BORAT:- You have to hold it down for ten seconds.
0:48:42 > 0:48:45- AS BORAT:- You have to hold it down for ten seconds.
0:48:45 > 0:48:48- Yeah.- It ain't the most riveting dialogue.
0:48:48 > 0:48:50It depends how you deliver it.
0:48:50 > 0:48:53You're in a panic - turn off the traction control!
0:48:53 > 0:48:55Where's the Len?! Where's the Len?!
0:48:55 > 0:48:58- OK, all right, let's do it. - Good. Thanks very much.
0:49:00 > 0:49:04'With the dialogue sorted, I went to see my rather bruised colleague,
0:49:04 > 0:49:09'who was now setting up a stunt in which the Jag would clip a caravan.'
0:49:09 > 0:49:12- What are you doing? - Filling the caravan with petrol.
0:49:12 > 0:49:16- Why?- So it explodes when the car hits it. Boom!
0:49:16 > 0:49:18Why would the caravan explode?
0:49:18 > 0:49:20Because I've filled it with petrol.
0:49:20 > 0:49:22But caravans are made from plywood,
0:49:22 > 0:49:24and plywood does not blow up when you bang into it.
0:49:26 > 0:49:29- It doesn't.- They have gas bottles in them. They would explode.
0:49:29 > 0:49:31See, that's what I'm replicating.
0:49:33 > 0:49:35- Car, "Boom!"- OK...
0:49:36 > 0:49:40Just a "Boof", OK? Just a "Boof".
0:49:40 > 0:49:43- Yeah.- But please don't go mad.
0:49:44 > 0:49:45No.
0:49:48 > 0:49:51'I then went to the other side of the caravan park,
0:49:51 > 0:49:54'because a piece of equipment called a Russian arm,
0:49:54 > 0:49:58'which costs £6,000 a day to rent, had just arrived
0:49:58 > 0:50:01'from the set of Spielberg's War Horse.'
0:50:01 > 0:50:04There it is. It's gyro stabilised,
0:50:04 > 0:50:07so it's smooth even if the car's going over rough ground.
0:50:07 > 0:50:10So even when the car's moving along, it can do that,
0:50:10 > 0:50:13which gives you very, very dynamic shots.
0:50:13 > 0:50:15This is what Hammond doesn't understand.
0:50:15 > 0:50:22You can use the camera to make the chase, the real chase, exciting.
0:50:22 > 0:50:26You don't need to have the car going through the air with two people
0:50:26 > 0:50:29out of the sunroof with MAC-10s, shooting at the car behind.
0:50:29 > 0:50:33'Eventually, Hammond called to say the caravan clip stunt was ready.
0:50:33 > 0:50:36'But since my pro drivers were busy with the Russian arm,
0:50:36 > 0:50:38'I fired up a back-up Jag
0:50:38 > 0:50:41'and volunteered to do the driving myself.'
0:50:41 > 0:50:43275, take one.
0:50:43 > 0:50:45B camera.
0:50:45 > 0:50:49Got my own airbag here, so if I do that, I'll be OK.
0:50:49 > 0:50:54Perspex in case I hit the driver's door. Airbags are disconnected.
0:50:54 > 0:50:56Traction control is off.
0:50:59 > 0:51:00OK.
0:51:00 > 0:51:03- DIRECTOR:- 'Cameras recording, please.'
0:51:03 > 0:51:07ENGINE REVS
0:51:07 > 0:51:09'Action, Jeremy.'
0:51:16 > 0:51:18KABOOM!
0:51:18 > 0:51:20Whoa! What the hell?!
0:51:25 > 0:51:27Hammond!
0:51:29 > 0:51:33It was supposed to be a gas bottle. What the hell...?
0:51:33 > 0:51:36- You blew the wrong caravan up! - You hit the wrong one!
0:51:36 > 0:51:42- I didn't hit the wrong one, that was the one we were supposed to... - You should have labelled it!
0:51:43 > 0:51:44Have you any idea...?
0:51:44 > 0:51:48The angry man is going to see this, he's going to see that,
0:51:48 > 0:51:54and then he's going to see his £50,000 Jaguar XFR.
0:51:54 > 0:51:56Ooh, my lord.
0:51:56 > 0:52:00- That wasn't supposed to happen. - He said, "Light bodywork damage..."
0:52:00 > 0:52:03- You ripped its arse off.- "..because then Jaguar could repair it
0:52:03 > 0:52:05"and I don't have to pay the full price."
0:52:05 > 0:52:10He's going to see what's happened here, Hammond, wrong caravan...
0:52:11 > 0:52:13..this...
0:52:13 > 0:52:15the explosion was late...
0:52:17 > 0:52:20- God almighty.- There's the edit.
0:52:20 > 0:52:23How can you edit an explosion to happen earlier than it does?
0:52:31 > 0:52:37You know Ray Winstone was watching that explosion from here, OK?
0:52:37 > 0:52:40He's watching, and this is not a word of a lie,
0:52:40 > 0:52:43that's a piece of glass from the caravan
0:52:43 > 0:52:45that's penetrated this caravan.
0:52:47 > 0:52:50If that had hit here,
0:52:50 > 0:52:54would you like to know what Sophie Raworth would have said
0:52:54 > 0:52:56on The Six O'Clock News tonight?
0:52:58 > 0:53:00'Hammond and I decided to beat a retreat
0:53:00 > 0:53:03'before the world's angriest man found out
0:53:03 > 0:53:06'how much of his money had gone up in smoke.
0:53:13 > 0:53:16'To try and cheer him up, we decided to demonstrate that,
0:53:16 > 0:53:21'despite all the mishaps, we had ended up with a good car chase.'
0:53:21 > 0:53:23On here?
0:53:25 > 0:53:27HORN BLARES
0:53:29 > 0:53:32How many horsepower has Plod got?
0:53:32 > 0:53:34- AS BORAT:- 250.
0:53:34 > 0:53:38God, Plod must be Robin. This thing's got 503.
0:53:38 > 0:53:39TYRES SCREECH
0:53:39 > 0:53:41HORN BLARES
0:53:41 > 0:53:45- AS BORAT:- Turn off the ABS. - 'Ow do you do that? 'Ow? 'Ow? 'Ow?
0:53:45 > 0:53:47- AS BORAT:- Pull the rhythm.
0:53:47 > 0:53:49TYRES SCREECH
0:53:53 > 0:53:55Gritty.
0:53:55 > 0:53:56EXPLOSION
0:54:07 > 0:54:10- AS BORAT:- Turn off the traction control.
0:54:10 > 0:54:11'Ow?
0:54:11 > 0:54:14- AS BORAT:- You have to hold it down for ten seconds.
0:54:16 > 0:54:18Why didn't we get a BMW?
0:54:18 > 0:54:21You only have to push the Len for five seconds.
0:54:32 > 0:54:35TYRES SQUEAL
0:54:35 > 0:54:40- Full ten?- Oh, yeah, ten seconds, and then the viewer's left in no doubt.
0:54:40 > 0:54:42Go!
0:54:44 > 0:54:47KABOOM!
0:54:51 > 0:54:53CRASH
0:54:56 > 0:55:00I think when the world's angriest man sees that,
0:55:00 > 0:55:04he's going to be quite pleased.
0:55:04 > 0:55:06- Is he?- I think so.
0:55:06 > 0:55:09I know there are one or two rough edges in it,
0:55:09 > 0:55:15but overall, it has a gritty reality.
0:55:15 > 0:55:18He's very keen on hero shots - you've seen Ray, you've seen Plan.
0:55:18 > 0:55:23This is Ray Winstone out of The Departed, Ray Winstone out of...
0:55:24 > 0:55:26..Cold Mountain.
0:55:26 > 0:55:28Out of bet364 adverts.
0:55:28 > 0:55:32There he is, rocking about as the car lands, and I think...
0:55:34 > 0:55:38I think we can pat ourselves on the back. I don't know where he is now,
0:55:38 > 0:55:41but he's probably regretting his behaviour today.
0:55:41 > 0:55:44- It was just a personality clash.- Really?
0:55:46 > 0:55:47Oh...
0:55:48 > 0:55:50Oh, not my car.
0:56:02 > 0:56:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:56:07 > 0:56:13This perfectly sane, rational, very professional man
0:56:13 > 0:56:17was driven to an act of petty vandalism by your incompetence?
0:56:17 > 0:56:19- He ruined my car. - You ruined his film!
0:56:19 > 0:56:22Can I just say, actually, we got a call the other day,
0:56:22 > 0:56:26and this is absolutely true, from a Hollywood producer
0:56:26 > 0:56:29who asked if we could film a lorry chase through Moscow
0:56:29 > 0:56:32for the new Die Hard film. Seriously.
0:56:32 > 0:56:34But he'll change his mind when he sees that, won't he?
0:56:34 > 0:56:38A-ha! You say that, but we brought back the rushes, the raw material,
0:56:38 > 0:56:42from our shoot, and we gave that to the editors, OK?
0:56:42 > 0:56:44It's still work in progress,
0:56:44 > 0:56:47but who here would like to see what they've come up with?
0:56:47 > 0:56:50- AUDIENCE:- Yeah.- OK, let's run the tape, let's have a look.
0:56:50 > 0:56:52TYRES SQUEAL
0:56:53 > 0:56:55HORNS BLARE
0:57:09 > 0:57:11HORN BLARES
0:58:04 > 0:58:06GUNSHOTS
0:58:10 > 0:58:12GUNFIRE
0:58:23 > 0:58:26APPLAUSE
0:58:27 > 0:58:29Yeah!
0:58:29 > 0:58:32Come on! Yeah!
0:58:32 > 0:58:35- Actually, it's not bad. - It's not bad at all.
0:58:35 > 0:58:38And on that bombshell, it is time to end.
0:58:38 > 0:58:41Thank you very much for watching. See you next week, goodnight!
0:58:41 > 0:58:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:59:03 > 0:59:06Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd