0:00:10 > 0:00:13Tonight... A dog looks over a wall...
0:00:14 > 0:00:16..we drive some chairs...
0:00:17 > 0:00:20..and The Stig does a skid in a supercharged Jag.
0:00:25 > 0:00:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:28 > 0:00:29Hello, everybody!
0:00:29 > 0:00:32Thank you so much. Thank you very much.
0:00:32 > 0:00:34Thank you.
0:00:34 > 0:00:36Now...
0:00:36 > 0:00:41Now, every year, we like to take three of the latest super-expensive
0:00:41 > 0:00:45supercars over to continental Europe to find out which one is best.
0:00:45 > 0:00:49But these days, thanks to the financial crisis over there,
0:00:49 > 0:00:52that's proving to be a bit tricky.
0:00:52 > 0:00:56MUSIC: "Rule Britannia"
0:01:07 > 0:01:10Here in Britain, the economy is not that great
0:01:10 > 0:01:13but from what we understand, over the border in Spain,
0:01:13 > 0:01:15things are absolutely dreadful.
0:01:15 > 0:01:18Yes, so it really wouldn't be appropriate for us to do what
0:01:18 > 0:01:23we usually do and turn up in three million-pound V12 monsters.
0:01:23 > 0:01:26- No, because that would just look like we were showing off.- Exactly.
0:01:26 > 0:01:29Yes, but because it's Spain, and therefore likely to be very sunny,
0:01:29 > 0:01:32we did want to be able to take the roof off, so what
0:01:32 > 0:01:36we've done is we've organised three budget convertibles for a nice drive
0:01:36 > 0:01:39from here in Britain to Madrid.
0:01:52 > 0:01:56I've gone for the second cheapest car in the Ferrari range,
0:01:56 > 0:01:58which is not necessarily a bad thing.
0:01:58 > 0:02:00It's like choosing wine in a restaurant.
0:02:00 > 0:02:04As we all know, the second cheapest is always your best bet.
0:02:06 > 0:02:11It's the 458 and this is the new Spider version, available
0:02:11 > 0:02:15now for a very reasonable £198,000.
0:02:20 > 0:02:23I've gone for the new McLaren convertible,
0:02:23 > 0:02:29the 12C Spider, which, amazingly, is even cheaper.
0:02:29 > 0:02:33This is just £195,000.
0:02:33 > 0:02:38For that sort of money, I was expecting a sort of Scout hut
0:02:38 > 0:02:41with windscreen wipers, but I've got sat nav,
0:02:41 > 0:02:44I've got air conditioning, central locking, electric windows,
0:02:44 > 0:02:48power steering, it's really not bad at all.
0:02:52 > 0:02:56But when it comes to value, Iron Man had trumped both of us.
0:02:58 > 0:02:59Yes, yes, hello, viewers,
0:02:59 > 0:03:02and as you would expect, I have done it properly.
0:03:02 > 0:03:06I've chosen the Audi R8 convertible, the V10 version,
0:03:06 > 0:03:10a mere sniff as £121,000.
0:03:10 > 0:03:13Although, to be honest, from where I'm sitting,
0:03:13 > 0:03:16I really can't work out why it's so much cheaper than the others.
0:03:16 > 0:03:23I mean, it has the biggest engine, 5.2-litre V10 from a Lamborghini...
0:03:23 > 0:03:27It has four-wheel drive, it has the best standard equipment.
0:03:27 > 0:03:30It is the perfect car for a cash-strapped economy.
0:03:34 > 0:03:36Our first port of call, however,
0:03:36 > 0:03:38didn't look very cash-strapped at all.
0:03:42 > 0:03:46That's because it was Puerto Banus, still thriving because
0:03:46 > 0:03:50every summer, people from Essex come here to make themselves more orange.
0:03:52 > 0:03:55Their taste may be quiet and restrained, but it's keeping
0:03:55 > 0:04:01the local economy going and it also gave James an idea for a test.
0:04:01 > 0:04:05Well, the whole point of a budget supercar is that it should be
0:04:05 > 0:04:07understated, right?
0:04:07 > 0:04:08So here's what we do.
0:04:08 > 0:04:13You have to drive from here to the other end of the harbour,
0:04:13 > 0:04:18one at a time, and the winner is the one whose car is least photographed.
0:04:18 > 0:04:24- James, I'm in a yellow metal flake convertible McLaren.- I know.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27- Well, it's going to get photographed all the time.- Well, you chose it.
0:04:28 > 0:04:32After dusk, and with a camera fitted to record flashes,
0:04:32 > 0:04:36James set off, confident his grey Audi would be like a ghost.
0:04:38 > 0:04:39Hammond...
0:04:41 > 0:04:44HE LAUGHS
0:04:44 > 0:04:46"People of Puerto Banus..."
0:04:46 > 0:04:49"James May driving through your town."
0:04:49 > 0:04:51"Now! Get your pictures."
0:04:51 > 0:04:53Tweet sent. Yes!
0:04:55 > 0:04:58Annoyingly, though, our plan didn't work very well.
0:05:00 > 0:05:04See, it doesn't draw attention, the car doesn't draw attention.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06No flashes whatsoever.
0:05:08 > 0:05:13There you go, a successful, largely photograph-free run.
0:05:15 > 0:05:20'The Ferrari attracted quite a lot more attention.'
0:05:20 > 0:05:22OK, that's...
0:05:22 > 0:05:25Yeah, I got hit there, that was a lucky shot.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27'..even after I'd finished.'
0:05:27 > 0:05:30- That does not count!- Can I have a picture of your car, mate?
0:05:32 > 0:05:36Then Jeremy set off in his metal flake yellow McLaren.
0:05:41 > 0:05:44Oh, this is astonishing.
0:05:44 > 0:05:48A McLaren Formula One car would get less attention than this.
0:05:48 > 0:05:51'Once I'd reached the finish line...'
0:05:51 > 0:05:53No photographs! No photographs here!
0:05:53 > 0:05:56'..the producers handed over the score.'
0:05:58 > 0:06:00- I'm really tired.- Read them out.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03- Shall I read them out? - Just read them out.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05I'm just... I just want to go to bed.
0:06:05 > 0:06:07OK, no need to do it in reverse order, then.
0:06:07 > 0:06:08Do it in the order we went.
0:06:08 > 0:06:11OK. Audi, 22.
0:06:11 > 0:06:1322 people took your picture.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15- Is that good or bad?- Ferrari...
0:06:15 > 0:06:1847 people took your picture.
0:06:20 > 0:06:22How many flashes?
0:06:23 > 0:06:26- Yes, you lost.- Bloody hell. - You did lose.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28438!
0:06:28 > 0:06:30THEY LAUGH
0:06:30 > 0:06:33So, as a budget supercar,
0:06:33 > 0:06:36McLaren has not done well in terms of understatement, has it?
0:06:36 > 0:06:38- No.- It's a bit conspicuous.
0:06:43 > 0:06:46The next day, we left the affluent coast
0:06:46 > 0:06:49and headed north into what people call the real Spain.
0:06:56 > 0:06:58So, Spain, six million unemployed
0:06:58 > 0:07:02and they have a smaller population than we do.
0:07:02 > 0:07:05Two million households have no income at all.
0:07:05 > 0:07:0857% youth unemployment.
0:07:09 > 0:07:12'Right now, though, James was dealing
0:07:12 > 0:07:15'with rather more serious issues.'
0:07:15 > 0:07:16The cabin is too blustery.
0:07:16 > 0:07:20I've got both the windows up and I have the windshield thing
0:07:20 > 0:07:23at the back up, but my hair still whips me in the eyeballs.
0:07:23 > 0:07:26I know some of you are going, "Why don't you get your hair cut, then?"
0:07:26 > 0:07:28Lots of people have lots of hair.
0:07:34 > 0:07:38James has now cured the appalling buffeting in the Audi
0:07:38 > 0:07:41with the simple addition of a bandanna...
0:07:43 > 0:07:44..which makes him look very manly.
0:07:48 > 0:07:53'We decided to stop in the next town for some coffee, and here
0:07:53 > 0:07:58'we saw just how badly hit Spain has been by the financial crisis.'
0:08:06 > 0:08:08These are all brand-new flats.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12There's nobody here.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14I mean, nobody at all.
0:08:16 > 0:08:21It's got all of the infrastructure. Street lights,
0:08:21 > 0:08:24pedestrian crossings, but no people at all.
0:08:27 > 0:08:28Look at it.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33It's a scene from a horror film.
0:08:33 > 0:08:35I mean, you hear about these ghost towns
0:08:35 > 0:08:37but you don't really think they exist.
0:08:39 > 0:08:41'Still, on the up-side,
0:08:41 > 0:08:45'the echoey, empty streets did provide the perfect setting
0:08:45 > 0:08:47'for a noise test.
0:08:47 > 0:08:50'I parked at the far end of town
0:08:50 > 0:08:54'while Jeremy fired up his decibel-o-meter.'
0:08:54 > 0:08:57When I say Jeremy has a decibel-o-meter,
0:08:57 > 0:08:59it's the decibel-o-meter app.
0:09:00 > 0:09:02It's probably rubbish.
0:09:02 > 0:09:04Slightly worried about this,
0:09:04 > 0:09:07- because he's got two more cylinders than we have.- Yes.
0:09:07 > 0:09:09He's got ten. So that's two more...
0:09:09 > 0:09:11- One more cylinder firing per... - Bank.
0:09:11 > 0:09:13- Yes.- So that's two more...
0:09:13 > 0:09:15He's got two banks of five, we've got two banks of four.
0:09:15 > 0:09:19Yes, so he's got two more explosions per...
0:09:19 > 0:09:22Per... Every time they're firing, there'll be one more.
0:09:22 > 0:09:25- Yes, but that's on each bank.- Yes.
0:09:25 > 0:09:28Welcome to Top Gear, the world's leading motoring show.
0:09:28 > 0:09:29Here we go.
0:09:32 > 0:09:33CAR REVS
0:09:39 > 0:09:42- 105.- 105.- Yes.
0:09:43 > 0:09:47'Next it was the McLaren's turn.'
0:09:47 > 0:09:50- I'm ready.- Oh, good.
0:09:50 > 0:09:51Begin.
0:09:51 > 0:09:53You see, start quietly.
0:09:55 > 0:10:01Hold it in second so when we get near the decibel-o-meter
0:10:01 > 0:10:03I'm at the top of the rev range. Here we go.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09Yes! Now, that was mighty.
0:10:12 > 0:10:15- What's my score?- 105.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17- What?- 105 again.
0:10:17 > 0:10:19- What, the same as his?- Yes.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22- That's very much the same, yes. - Rubbish!
0:10:23 > 0:10:27'With Jeremy still complaining, I lined up the Ferrari.'
0:10:29 > 0:10:32I bet he just floors it from the start.
0:10:32 > 0:10:34Yes, he has. Daft as a brush.
0:10:34 > 0:10:36He's got to go as fast as possible.
0:10:39 > 0:10:41Stupidest man in the world.
0:10:47 > 0:10:50- 107.- Hmm.
0:10:51 > 0:10:55Hammond was, as ever, gracious in victory.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57Ha-ha! Come on, it's still more,
0:10:57 > 0:10:59and those last few decibels are harder to get.
0:10:59 > 0:11:01It's like the last few miles an hour because of aerodynamics.
0:11:01 > 0:11:04- So, wait, that must mean you lose. - It does.- No, you got 105...
0:11:04 > 0:11:07No, it's budget supercars.
0:11:07 > 0:11:10- Discretion.- The quietist.- Yeah.
0:11:10 > 0:11:13- Really?- We've just decided.
0:11:13 > 0:11:16So the rules have just changed at the exact moment at which you lost
0:11:16 > 0:11:17and I won.
0:11:17 > 0:11:19We never discussed rules.
0:11:22 > 0:11:26'Back on the move, we headed for the Sierra Nevada mountains on what is
0:11:26 > 0:11:29'not only the highest road in Europe
0:11:29 > 0:11:31'but also one of the most spectacular.
0:11:37 > 0:11:41'This is perfect supercar country.'
0:11:47 > 0:11:51When the McLaren MP4 first came out 18 months ago, it was better than
0:11:51 > 0:11:58a Ferrari 458 in every measurable way, but it lacked panache,
0:11:58 > 0:12:00it lacked zing, it lacked excitement,
0:12:00 > 0:12:03it felt clinical and antiseptic.
0:12:04 > 0:12:08'Since then, though, they've made lots of little changes,
0:12:08 > 0:12:11'so now there's more noise and even more power.'
0:12:15 > 0:12:18But the big thing is - all that sky!
0:12:26 > 0:12:32This is what the McLaren was always meant to be - open top.
0:12:34 > 0:12:37'By taking off the roof, they've turned the McLaren from a car
0:12:37 > 0:12:42'you admire into a car you want.'
0:12:42 > 0:12:44Oh, you really, really want this.
0:13:02 > 0:13:04There's no denying it,
0:13:04 > 0:13:07the Ferrari is down on power compared to the McLaren.
0:13:07 > 0:13:11Overall, it makes about 50 brake horsepower fewer, but it is lighter,
0:13:11 > 0:13:13it's the lightest here.
0:13:13 > 0:13:15Nevertheless, I am not complaining.
0:13:17 > 0:13:20The point and squirt-ability of this thing...
0:13:20 > 0:13:22OK, a bit of wrestling to get it around the corner and then...
0:13:22 > 0:13:24HE REVS ENGINE
0:13:24 > 0:13:27Ya! What a soundtrack!
0:13:29 > 0:13:32'Meanwhile, back in the cheap seats...'
0:13:40 > 0:13:45Right, serious stuff. This Audi is, give or take a few quid,
0:13:45 > 0:13:49£70,000 cheaper than the other two.
0:13:49 > 0:13:51So, why?
0:13:51 > 0:13:53Well, it's got a slightly lower top speed.
0:13:53 > 0:13:56It's slightly slower at 60 miles an hour.
0:13:56 > 0:13:57It weighs quite a bit more,
0:13:57 > 0:14:01and with the best will in the world, it does have a second-hand engine.
0:14:03 > 0:14:07But it does have four-wheel-drive.
0:14:07 > 0:14:09'And then there's the new gearbox.'
0:14:11 > 0:14:14It used to be the single clutch flappy paddle type.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16It's now twin clutch, seven speed,
0:14:16 > 0:14:20and it is absolutely fantastic. Listen to this.
0:14:20 > 0:14:22HE MOVES THROUGH GEARS
0:14:22 > 0:14:24A gear, a gear.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28Seriously, it is superb.
0:14:30 > 0:14:34'Intoxicated by our cut-price supercars, we climbed higher
0:14:34 > 0:14:36'and higher.'
0:14:38 > 0:14:40Come on, Hammond, try and live with this.
0:14:42 > 0:14:43HE LAUGHS
0:14:44 > 0:14:48God, it announces its arrival!
0:14:48 > 0:14:51And the road got better and better.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53Snow!
0:14:54 > 0:14:55Look at that!
0:14:57 > 0:15:01This road is just staggering.
0:15:01 > 0:15:04How much did it cost?
0:15:04 > 0:15:05Oh.
0:15:05 > 0:15:07ENGINE QUIETENS
0:15:07 > 0:15:08Oh.
0:15:11 > 0:15:13What, that's it?
0:15:16 > 0:15:20- And stop. - What? Hang on a second!
0:15:20 > 0:15:23- You know the road was really quiet?- Yes.
0:15:23 > 0:15:25- Would you like to know why?- Yes.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28- It doesn't go anywhere. - That's the end.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30I can't wait to see the road that leads to a city.
0:15:30 > 0:15:34- It's going to be absolutely awesome. - It must be if it goes somewhere!
0:15:36 > 0:15:38APPLAUSE
0:15:38 > 0:15:42- How much money did that cost? - Yes, a lot.
0:15:42 > 0:15:48Anyway, what we learned on the road to absolutely nowhere at all
0:15:48 > 0:15:51- is just how fast that McLaren is. - Yes.
0:15:51 > 0:15:55I mean, it was fast when it came out, but now...
0:15:55 > 0:15:58It's astonishing, and when you're in a Ferrari, you do not expect
0:15:58 > 0:16:00to be left behind by anything.
0:16:00 > 0:16:03On the straights, it just walks away.
0:16:03 > 0:16:06It was like you were in a Nissan Micra and I was in a supercar.
0:16:06 > 0:16:08That's the straights, the corners were worse
0:16:08 > 0:16:11because following the McLaren, you watch it go round at a speed,
0:16:11 > 0:16:14and you think, "I'll go around at the same speed," and you can't.
0:16:14 > 0:16:16It's unbelievable.
0:16:16 > 0:16:19Can I just say, the McLaren is epic, I agree with you,
0:16:19 > 0:16:25but in the two tests we conducted so far, the victor is the Audi.
0:16:25 > 0:16:28Yes, it tied with the McLaren for one of them.
0:16:28 > 0:16:33- We also did an economy run. And the Audi won that as well.- Yes, it did.
0:16:33 > 0:16:37So, anyway, later on, there will be more cut-price supercar larks
0:16:37 > 0:16:42from Spain. In the meantime, here is the news.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45We've got some important consumer news for everybody.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48When you go to a car showroom now, the salesman will try to sell you
0:16:48 > 0:16:51lots of electronic bits and bobs for your car.
0:16:51 > 0:16:55Here's our Top Gear top tip - don't bother with any of them
0:16:55 > 0:16:57because they don't work, any of them.
0:16:57 > 0:16:59- Bluetooth. Bluetooth never works. - It doesn't.
0:16:59 > 0:17:03Hammond uses it and it's like he's sitting at the bottom of a river.
0:17:03 > 0:17:06Well, to be fair, sometimes I am.
0:17:06 > 0:17:09Shall I tell you the thing that doesn't work most of all?
0:17:09 > 0:17:12- Voice activation. - That's just a shouting match.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14You're driving along, don't have to take your hands off the wheel.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17- You go, "Call Richard Hammond." - "Collapsing suspension".
0:17:17 > 0:17:19- LAUGHTER - It does!
0:17:19 > 0:17:21Oh, it's misunderstood me.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24- HE SPEAKS SLOWLY - "Call Richard Hammond."
0:17:24 > 0:17:26"Deflating tyres."
0:17:26 > 0:17:28That's it!
0:17:28 > 0:17:30"Reinflate tyres!"
0:17:30 > 0:17:33"Reinflate tyres!" "Calling Richard Hammond."
0:17:33 > 0:17:38The problem is that, in the olden days, when it first came out,
0:17:38 > 0:17:41voice activation was just for the radio or the satellite navigation.
0:17:41 > 0:17:43Now it's for every single feature on the car
0:17:43 > 0:17:46and in your life, and it has to understand every accent
0:17:46 > 0:17:48in all of Britain.
0:17:48 > 0:17:49"Och aye the noo."
0:17:49 > 0:17:51"All right, pet?"
0:17:51 > 0:17:52LAUGHTER
0:17:52 > 0:17:56It just can't cope. So, you're driving along, you go, "Radio 2."
0:17:56 > 0:17:59"Accessing bank account."
0:17:59 > 0:18:00Oh, no!
0:18:00 > 0:18:04"Transferring funds." God, no, don't!
0:18:04 > 0:18:07Modern cars are deeply irritating because of the electronics.
0:18:07 > 0:18:09Can I move it on now?
0:18:09 > 0:18:12Now, last week I asked if you would send in
0:18:12 > 0:18:16photographs of Jeremy on his new bicycle.
0:18:16 > 0:18:19Because... Well, I didn't expect to get anything because, frankly,
0:18:19 > 0:18:23- I didn't believe he'd bought a bike. - I have!- Well...- I have!
0:18:23 > 0:18:24Do you know, I now believe you.
0:18:24 > 0:18:27I know you have, because somebody HAS sent in a picture.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29And here he is - Jeremy on his bicycle.
0:18:29 > 0:18:33LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:18:37 > 0:18:40It's, er... It's working.
0:18:40 > 0:18:42You are losing weight. You're trimming down.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45That's not my bike. I haven't got stabilisers.
0:18:45 > 0:18:48Otherwise, it's pretty accurate.
0:18:48 > 0:18:50Now, there's a new supercar.
0:18:50 > 0:18:54It is called the...Icona Vulcano. Here it is.
0:18:54 > 0:18:58Jeremy, did you do that publicity photograph?
0:18:58 > 0:19:00That's what I call a publicity shot.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03I love that very much. Not sure about the car, though.
0:19:03 > 0:19:08They say it has a V12 hybrid, but they won't tell us
0:19:08 > 0:19:11where the V12's from or how the hybrid system works.
0:19:11 > 0:19:14All they will say is it develops 950 horsepower
0:19:14 > 0:19:17and will go 217 miles an hour.
0:19:17 > 0:19:19- Does it?- Mmm, mmm.
0:19:19 > 0:19:23The reason I brought this car up is their chief design director,
0:19:23 > 0:19:27his name is Samuel Chuffart.
0:19:27 > 0:19:30- Give over. - LAUGHTER
0:19:30 > 0:19:31It's not.
0:19:31 > 0:19:37- His name is not Chuffart. - It's not!- Chuffart.- Lovely.
0:19:37 > 0:19:40There's a man with fond memories of his school days!
0:19:41 > 0:19:45Every register, "Oh, no, it's got to Christian, I'm next." "Chuffart".
0:19:45 > 0:19:48"A-ha-ha-ha." I bet the novelty never wore off for him.
0:19:48 > 0:19:50We actually asked our researchers to call up this company and say,
0:19:50 > 0:19:53"Can you tell us more about the car?" And not one of them
0:19:53 > 0:19:56could get through the beginning bit of the call without bursting...
0:19:56 > 0:19:59The receptionist on the other end must be used to the phone ringing
0:19:59 > 0:20:01and there's someone laughing, "Yeah, I'll put you through."
0:20:01 > 0:20:03"Hello, Chuffart."
0:20:03 > 0:20:09He probably just answers the phone with the words, "Yes, that is my name. Let's clear the air now."
0:20:09 > 0:20:11LAUGHTER AND GROANS
0:20:11 > 0:20:13That's how that picture came about.
0:20:13 > 0:20:16Someone lit a match just after Chuff farted!
0:20:18 > 0:20:22Moving on. Because this week we are testing the McLaren 12C Spider,
0:20:22 > 0:20:27the Ferrari 458 Spider and the Audi R8 V10.
0:20:27 > 0:20:31- Let me guess, is it Spider? - Do you know, it is. It is a Spider.
0:20:31 > 0:20:34We have chosen budget supercars because we are in Spain,
0:20:34 > 0:20:36where the economic problems are terrible.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39Yeah, so far we've been to a ghost town.
0:20:39 > 0:20:41It had a hospital, it had a school, had restaurants,
0:20:41 > 0:20:44had thousands of houses and flats, but no people at all.
0:20:44 > 0:20:47We've been on a road that went nowhere.
0:20:47 > 0:20:49It was like filming in a ghost country, actually.
0:20:49 > 0:20:53Anyway, we pick up the story after a night in a hotel in Granada.
0:21:16 > 0:21:18We headed north the following morning,
0:21:18 > 0:21:22worried that we'd hit the rush-hour traffic. However...
0:21:25 > 0:21:29So there's only three cars on this motorway and we're in all of them.
0:21:29 > 0:21:33- Look at that. - Our own personal motorway.
0:21:33 > 0:21:34I've always wanted a motorway.
0:21:36 > 0:21:37Since no-one was around,
0:21:37 > 0:21:40we thought we would see how fast our cars would go.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43We just need to find a straight bit.
0:21:45 > 0:21:47Now, this is quite straight.
0:21:49 > 0:21:54At 200 miles an hour, this slight corner becomes a hairpin bend.
0:21:54 > 0:21:56We need arrow straight.
0:21:57 > 0:22:02'When we did eventually find a long enough straight, it had goats on it.
0:22:03 > 0:22:08'So we were about to give up on our top speed run, but then...'
0:22:09 > 0:22:10Ooh, an airport.
0:22:12 > 0:22:16- Chaps, is that an airport?- I just thought... Yes, aeropuerto, it is.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18Well, if the runway's as busy as the roads,
0:22:18 > 0:22:22we might be able to use the runway for our speed test.
0:22:28 > 0:22:31God, there's some parking available!
0:22:31 > 0:22:33All of it, in fact.
0:22:36 > 0:22:39Er... Where is everyone?
0:22:44 > 0:22:48'We went inside to look for someone in charge.'
0:22:49 > 0:22:51Hello?
0:22:53 > 0:22:54Hello?
0:22:55 > 0:22:58'But the whole place was completely deserted.'
0:23:01 > 0:23:05The computers are all on, look! I can make a baggage check.
0:23:05 > 0:23:08- I can log on! - I've got one of those things that goes...- I can check you in!
0:23:12 > 0:23:13Ha-ha-ha-ha!
0:23:13 > 0:23:17- The wheel's coming off. - My wheel's come off!
0:23:17 > 0:23:19- Hello.- I'll be Lufthansa. I am sorry, the gate is closed.
0:23:19 > 0:23:23- Well, can you just open it?- Nein.
0:23:23 > 0:23:27I haven't got a passport, I've just got a selection of weapons, some concealed drugs.
0:23:30 > 0:23:32Eventually, though, we found what we came for.
0:23:34 > 0:23:36- That is a runway over there, I believe.- Yes.
0:23:38 > 0:23:42'But since there was no-one around to ask for permission to use it,
0:23:42 > 0:23:45'we had to improvise.'
0:23:45 > 0:23:48Would it be possible for us to drive on the runway here?
0:23:48 > 0:23:52- Is there any flight traffic today? - No, it's very quiet today.
0:23:52 > 0:23:54I imagine it'll be fine.
0:23:54 > 0:23:57JEREMY LAUGHS
0:23:59 > 0:24:02With permission granted, we headed out to the runway.
0:24:04 > 0:24:07It's all right, I've got it. I've got it. It's OK.
0:24:08 > 0:24:10I can't do manual labour, you know that.
0:24:14 > 0:24:15Look at that!
0:24:17 > 0:24:18It's ours!
0:24:29 > 0:24:34The runway was a whopping 2.5 miles long.
0:24:34 > 0:24:36More than enough to max our cars.
0:24:39 > 0:24:41Hammond elected to go first.
0:24:41 > 0:24:44I'm always nervous when he drives in a straight line.
0:24:44 > 0:24:47"Richard Hammond, can you drive in a straight line down a runway?
0:24:47 > 0:24:49"Yes, what can possibly go wrong with that?"
0:24:50 > 0:24:54Hit the launch control button with it in race, and manual.
0:24:54 > 0:24:57Give it max revs, my right foot. ENGINE REVS
0:24:57 > 0:24:59Left foot off. Right, we're away!
0:25:00 > 0:25:02It does the first gear change for me, now it's up to me,
0:25:02 > 0:25:04and already we're doing 85, 90...
0:25:04 > 0:25:09100 miles an hour, that quickly.
0:25:09 > 0:25:11Damn, this thing is fast!
0:25:14 > 0:25:16Oh, look at the dust cloud.
0:25:16 > 0:25:19138, 141.
0:25:19 > 0:25:23I can hear the grit hitting the underside of the car. There's a lot of it.
0:25:23 > 0:25:27Seventh gear has just been hit. 175 miles an hour.
0:25:27 > 0:25:28Still accelerating hard.
0:25:28 > 0:25:33I can see the line, 186...87, 88.
0:25:33 > 0:25:35Come on, Ferrari, accelerate!
0:25:35 > 0:25:40- Now, that is a Ferrari at full chat. - 90. 91.
0:25:41 > 0:25:4292.
0:25:43 > 0:25:4692, 93.
0:25:46 > 0:25:51193 miles an hour. Top speed achieved.
0:25:51 > 0:25:53Next up, it was James,
0:25:53 > 0:25:57who decided to use absolutely all of the available space.
0:25:57 > 0:26:02Right, here we go. Sport, sport suspension, air con is off.
0:26:02 > 0:26:06Manual one. Here we go...
0:26:08 > 0:26:11Right, here he comes now. Captain Slow is his name.
0:26:11 > 0:26:13Or the Italians call him "Mr Slowly".
0:26:16 > 0:26:18That's 80.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21I know at some point in that car, when he's doing his run,
0:26:21 > 0:26:23he is saying, "Buffeting".
0:26:23 > 0:26:25Buffeting.
0:26:26 > 0:26:29He's moving along in the right direction.
0:26:29 > 0:26:32It's weird to think James May in that, doing that speed.
0:26:32 > 0:26:34A spaniel in control of that.
0:26:36 > 0:26:39Indicated 175, 177. Come on!
0:26:43 > 0:26:46That said 186.
0:26:47 > 0:26:50Knowing that modern-day speedos are frighteningly accurate,
0:26:50 > 0:26:55I knew what speed I had to beat - Hammond's, 193.
0:26:55 > 0:27:02OK, launch control. First gear. Press launch. Launch active.
0:27:03 > 0:27:05Three, two, one. Go!
0:27:05 > 0:27:08Oh, wow, that's quick!
0:27:10 > 0:27:1280 miles an hour already.
0:27:14 > 0:27:17Here he comes. He's moving at tremendous speed.
0:27:20 > 0:27:24140. I'm taking manual control now
0:27:24 > 0:27:25to lock it in six.
0:27:25 > 0:27:28I don't want to go into seventh
0:27:28 > 0:27:31because that will slow it down.
0:27:31 > 0:27:34Come on! 191, 193.
0:27:34 > 0:27:39194, 195, 196, 197.
0:27:39 > 0:27:41197 again.
0:27:41 > 0:27:45Well, I'm through and I've indicated...198.
0:27:46 > 0:27:49Victory, therefore, is mine.
0:27:50 > 0:27:52'Annoyingly, though, we weren't finished,
0:27:52 > 0:27:55'because James had come up with an idea.'
0:27:56 > 0:27:58It's a drag race, but because of the weather,
0:27:58 > 0:28:01especially what it's doing today, you have to start
0:28:01 > 0:28:06with your roof down and you have to finish with your roof up.
0:28:06 > 0:28:10- And that's not quite as simple as it sounds.- Well, no, it isn't.
0:28:10 > 0:28:15- Because I can operate this roof while I'm driving.- So can I.
0:28:15 > 0:28:19- He can't.- You can't. No, Ferrari, you have to...- You have to stop.
0:28:19 > 0:28:22- Which means... Hang on!- No, actually, this is quite interesting.
0:28:22 > 0:28:26I can do 19 miles an hour and put the roof up.
0:28:26 > 0:28:29- How fast can you go?- 31.
0:28:29 > 0:28:32- You're joking? - But officially, your roof, I think, goes up in 14 seconds.
0:28:32 > 0:28:36Mine is about 19. This is very complicated.
0:28:36 > 0:28:38- So, the flag drops.- Yes.
0:28:38 > 0:28:41I set off, but I can only go 19 miles an hour,
0:28:41 > 0:28:43- while the roof is coming up. Then I can go.- Yup.
0:28:43 > 0:28:47- You can go to 31 miles an hour... - But I have to stay there for longer.
0:28:47 > 0:28:52Because your roof takes longer to go up. You can't set off at all until your roof is up.
0:28:52 > 0:28:56- But then...- Go like hell. - Yeah, you launch control and go like hell.- Yeah.
0:28:58 > 0:29:00Having settled on a half-mile distance,
0:29:00 > 0:29:03we lined up, and our Spanish starter began the countdown.
0:29:05 > 0:29:07Tres, dos, uno...
0:29:10 > 0:29:12- We begin, we begin, we begin. - I daren't put it in launch.
0:29:12 > 0:29:15They're moving away, I'm not going anywhere!
0:29:15 > 0:29:18Less than 19.
0:29:18 > 0:29:2118 miles an hour. 19. 18.
0:29:21 > 0:29:23Come on, hurry up!
0:29:24 > 0:29:26Oh, I have exceeded the roof speed. Argh!
0:29:28 > 0:29:30Bang!
0:29:30 > 0:29:34Oh, God. Struggling for grip. Windows are going up now.
0:29:34 > 0:29:36Roof latched! I am away!
0:29:39 > 0:29:44- I've passed James. Ha-ha! Ha-ha! Oh- BLEEP!
0:29:48 > 0:29:49I did that wrong.
0:29:52 > 0:29:54We lined up for a second attempt.
0:29:57 > 0:30:00Right, glasses on so I can read when the roof is latched.
0:30:00 > 0:30:04Right, keep your finger on the button and concentrate on the speed.
0:30:11 > 0:30:16Here we go. Keep it below 19 miles an hour, Jeremy. 18, 19.
0:30:16 > 0:30:19I wait until the roof is up and just before the back hatch goes down,
0:30:19 > 0:30:22I'm going to hit the launch control button. There.
0:30:22 > 0:30:23Oh, come on!
0:30:23 > 0:30:26This feels astonishingly slow.
0:30:26 > 0:30:2819, oh, 20. Roof operation in progress.
0:30:28 > 0:30:30That's down. I can go now.
0:30:36 > 0:30:37Roof closed!
0:30:41 > 0:30:45I'm changing gear with my left hand. How multi-tasking was that?
0:30:45 > 0:30:49- I am passing James May. - They're getting closer to the line.
0:30:49 > 0:30:51I think Jeremy is going to cross now.
0:30:51 > 0:30:55- But I'm getting closer to the Audi by the second.- Hammond's coming!
0:30:55 > 0:30:58I'm going to get him, I'm going to get him!
0:30:58 > 0:31:01- Second.- Oh-ho-ho!
0:31:01 > 0:31:04Victory has been mine.
0:31:07 > 0:31:11Weirdly, though, James had a different view.
0:31:11 > 0:31:13The Audi's basically won all of that.
0:31:13 > 0:31:17I'm sorry James, I think you'll find the McLaren got there miles before you.
0:31:17 > 0:31:23Highest top speed, McLaren. So the McLaren has won both things.
0:31:23 > 0:31:26However, could I draw your attention to a few things?
0:31:26 > 0:31:30A completely ruined back wheel, same on the other side.
0:31:30 > 0:31:32I don't need to remind you of that.
0:31:32 > 0:31:36- Up here we find a very badly chipped windscreen.- Hammond did that.
0:31:36 > 0:31:38It doesn't matter who did it, it's very badly chipped.
0:31:38 > 0:31:43YOU also have a very badly chipped windscreen. Where is it? Over there.
0:31:43 > 0:31:45You have ruined wheels.
0:31:45 > 0:31:48If you look down here, our cameraman wants to come and see this.
0:31:48 > 0:31:52This bit of the bodywork has actually been eaten away.
0:31:53 > 0:31:56'And that wasn't the only problem caused by the dust
0:31:56 > 0:31:58'and grit on the unused runway.'
0:32:00 > 0:32:02Oh, look underneath!
0:32:02 > 0:32:04Oh, God!
0:32:04 > 0:32:08The Audi, meanwhile, was totally unmarked.
0:32:08 > 0:32:11Why do the Germans put paint on in such a way that it doesn't
0:32:11 > 0:32:12then come off?
0:32:12 > 0:32:16Because they are Germans and it is impossible to paint a car badly.
0:32:18 > 0:32:21Conceding James' point, we got back on the road
0:32:21 > 0:32:25and with evening approaching, it was time to look for somewhere to stay.
0:32:28 > 0:32:36- Chaps?- Yes.- I've had yet another brilliant idea.- Have you? What?
0:32:37 > 0:32:39Well, instead of looking for a hotel,
0:32:39 > 0:32:43why don't we just go into the next town and help ourselves to a house?
0:32:45 > 0:32:47OK.
0:32:47 > 0:32:49It's not a bad idea.
0:32:51 > 0:32:53In the next town, we started househunting,
0:32:53 > 0:32:59- and frankly we were spoilt for choice.- I would quite like a view.
0:33:00 > 0:33:03Well, that one's garden's all overgrown. I don't fancy that.
0:33:04 > 0:33:06I don't want one with a dog.
0:33:07 > 0:33:13How about 53? Do you like 53? Or 55?
0:33:13 > 0:33:15As a number, I prefer 55.
0:33:17 > 0:33:22'With that settled, we moved in.' Oh, it's nice!
0:33:22 > 0:33:24Oh, no. Junk mail.
0:33:26 > 0:33:29Is this a bedroom? I'm going to have this.
0:33:29 > 0:33:32Hasn't actually got a bed in it, but that'll be all right.
0:33:32 > 0:33:38- Wow, look at this! I've got a bath, bidet, bog.- Hammond?
0:33:38 > 0:33:42- Yes?- We've found your room.- Let me guess, is it small?- It's low.
0:33:42 > 0:33:46It's not. Oh, it's en suite. Look at that!
0:33:46 > 0:33:48I'm happy with that.
0:33:50 > 0:33:53'Having brightened the place up with some decorations,
0:33:53 > 0:33:57'Jeremy cooked us a paella while we discussed our cars.'
0:33:57 > 0:34:00If we have to identify the best budget supercar, it's the Audi,
0:34:00 > 0:34:01there's no question about it.
0:34:01 > 0:34:06- If you have to identify the best car, it's the Ferrari.- No, no, no.
0:34:06 > 0:34:10- It isn't.- Yes, it is.- Well, it isn't. The McLaren is a better car.
0:34:10 > 0:34:14- It's not a better supercar.- You didn't say supercar. You said car.
0:34:14 > 0:34:16OK, best supercar.
0:34:16 > 0:34:19Well, now you see that the best supercar is the Ferrari.
0:34:19 > 0:34:22- The best car is the McLaren. - Yeah, but if I'm buying a supercar, I'm buying...
0:34:22 > 0:34:26- ..and the winner of this test, so far...- ..is the Audi.
0:34:26 > 0:34:27..is the Audi.
0:34:27 > 0:34:32- I'd go with that entirely.- Yes. Not very useful for the viewers.
0:34:32 > 0:34:36'With dinner served, we carried on trying to reach a verdict.
0:34:36 > 0:34:38'But it was hopeless.'
0:34:39 > 0:34:42Yes, it is, but the Ferrari, they've injected some magic into...
0:34:42 > 0:34:46- With the roof off, it is properly good.- No way!
0:34:46 > 0:34:47£70,000 will buy a cook.
0:34:49 > 0:34:54Would it interfere with this debate if I was suddenly and violently sick?
0:34:54 > 0:34:56DOG BARKS
0:34:56 > 0:34:58APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:35:00 > 0:35:04He's waiting for a photo to download on his computer.
0:35:04 > 0:35:08He's sitting there going, "Buffering. Buffering."
0:35:08 > 0:35:13Now, look, we want to make it absolutely clear, that airport is not a film set.
0:35:13 > 0:35:15It opened five years ago, then it went bust,
0:35:15 > 0:35:18- then it closed down last year.- Yeah.
0:35:18 > 0:35:20It's amazing, though, if you think about it.
0:35:20 > 0:35:23We all have unused things lying around - I've got a bread maker and a wok -
0:35:23 > 0:35:26- I haven't got an international airport.- No.
0:35:26 > 0:35:30About that, did you see what that runway did to my Ferrari?
0:35:30 > 0:35:32Mmm, and you should see what happens to it later on.
0:35:32 > 0:35:34Shouldn't we, Richard Hammond?
0:35:34 > 0:35:36I don't think you really want to hang on and watch that.
0:35:36 > 0:35:38Maybe turn over to Countryfile, now.
0:35:38 > 0:35:43- James... James, would you stay with Top Gear, or switch over to see Adam's farm.- Let me have a think.
0:35:43 > 0:35:45- Yes, I'd stay with Top Gear. - I'd stay with Top Gear.
0:35:45 > 0:35:48Anyway, that's then, this is now,
0:35:48 > 0:35:51and we must put a star in our Reasonably Priced Car.
0:35:51 > 0:35:55Now, my guest, my guest tonight is best known for dying
0:35:55 > 0:36:01- and then coming back to life. But it is not the baby Jesus. - LAUGHTER
0:36:01 > 0:36:05It is the man who played Sherlock Holmes on the television.
0:36:05 > 0:36:08Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Benedict Cumberbatch.
0:36:08 > 0:36:11CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:36:19 > 0:36:21- Have a seat. - Wow. Wow, wow, wow.
0:36:21 > 0:36:23Wow. Thank you very much.
0:36:23 > 0:36:27Now, that was a welcome.
0:36:27 > 0:36:31That was a welcome from a lot of people who want to know
0:36:31 > 0:36:33how you're not dead?
0:36:33 > 0:36:37Well, when I jump off, there's a helicopter with Mycroft
0:36:37 > 0:36:39in it dressed as a woman and an inflatable skirt.
0:36:39 > 0:36:43And then he takes a pill, which basically means that the helicopter...
0:36:43 > 0:36:45I'm not going to tell anyone. I can't.
0:36:45 > 0:36:47Oh, no, I was really enjoying that!
0:36:47 > 0:36:50Cos it was obviously one of the most written-about
0:36:50 > 0:36:53and talked-about events in modern television history.
0:36:53 > 0:36:55I wasn't here.
0:36:55 > 0:36:56I sort of missed it.
0:36:56 > 0:36:59The furore at home, anyway. I was abroad.
0:36:59 > 0:37:00I heard that it went on for weeks.
0:37:00 > 0:37:04It did, you actually fell off a building and then you're not dead.
0:37:04 > 0:37:05Yeah.
0:37:05 > 0:37:07- Then we saw you dead, but anyway... - Yeah.
0:37:07 > 0:37:10When do you find out how that had been achieved?
0:37:10 > 0:37:13I think it'll be some time near the end of this year,
0:37:13 > 0:37:16or at the beginning of next. That's what we're aiming for.
0:37:16 > 0:37:19- Obviously, more recently, we've seen you in the new Star Trek movie. - Yeah.
0:37:19 > 0:37:21Anyone seen that?
0:37:21 > 0:37:23- AUDIENCE: Yes!- Absolutely.
0:37:23 > 0:37:26- And you are a damn good baddie, if I may be so bold.- Thank you very much.
0:37:26 > 0:37:31It does beg the question, why are the Americans incapable of casting
0:37:31 > 0:37:34- an American as the baddie in any film?- I don't know.
0:37:34 > 0:37:37I had a sort of pet theory that they do vowels, which are sort of warm
0:37:37 > 0:37:39and loving and feeling, and we do consonants,
0:37:39 > 0:37:42which are sharp and intelligent and thinking.
0:37:42 > 0:37:43We sound more intelligent?
0:37:43 > 0:37:46Sort of, and maybe that's scary for them, I don't know!
0:37:47 > 0:37:49- End of my US career! - Yes, I was going to say!
0:37:49 > 0:37:52One of the things I must ask is, now that you've appeared in Star Trek,
0:37:52 > 0:37:55do you find yourself being approached
0:37:55 > 0:37:58by those of a Trekkie disposition?
0:37:58 > 0:38:00The ones I have met are remarkably normal.
0:38:00 > 0:38:04- It is a bit like, "I-I'm quite a Trekkie fan, actually."- You are?
0:38:04 > 0:38:06No, that was me pretending to be one.
0:38:06 > 0:38:10Oh, OK! You're such a good actor, I thought actually you were one!
0:38:10 > 0:38:12Fooled you there, Jeremy! Fooled you there!
0:38:12 > 0:38:14I wasn't, actually, I wasn't a Trekkie.
0:38:14 > 0:38:17I watched the first film, I was very into that, and then I obviously did
0:38:17 > 0:38:21a little bit of research as far as what I was about to do in the canon,
0:38:21 > 0:38:24and I really got into it. It was great to be a part of it.
0:38:24 > 0:38:27You do worry about saying that you like Star Trek,
0:38:27 > 0:38:29but I've always liked it, ever since it was Kirk and Spock,
0:38:29 > 0:38:31right the way through, Jean-Luc Picard.
0:38:31 > 0:38:34- Yeah, it's a great relationship. A great relationship.- Yeah...- No?
0:38:34 > 0:38:36I don't see that - what relationship?
0:38:36 > 0:38:38Between Kirk, Spock and Bones. I think those three...
0:38:38 > 0:38:41This is it, if I talk about a relationship between two men
0:38:41 > 0:38:43in a drama, they're immediately at it.
0:38:44 > 0:38:46The worldwide inter-lie will just go, splat,
0:38:46 > 0:38:49there's a load of fan fiction which has me and John Watson
0:38:49 > 0:38:52floating in space in a bed, handcuffed to one another.
0:38:54 > 0:38:56Not just with handcuffs either!
0:38:56 > 0:38:58I could write that tonight, it would be fun!
0:39:00 > 0:39:04- You're from an acting family.- I am, my mum and dad are both actors.
0:39:04 > 0:39:07Mum... Both, actually... My car history sort of begins with them.
0:39:07 > 0:39:09I sort of was introduced to cars by them...
0:39:09 > 0:39:12- It's interesting, we've got a photograph of your mum here, look. - Yep.
0:39:12 > 0:39:15Now, my mum didn't have a car like that.
0:39:15 > 0:39:18- Is that from a Gerry Anderson? - It is, it's from UFO. Yeah.
0:39:18 > 0:39:20- No, she was in UFO? - She was in UFO.
0:39:20 > 0:39:23So that obviously wasn't her car, that is a...?
0:39:23 > 0:39:26No, but she did drive it, and it was driveable. She had an MGT...
0:39:26 > 0:39:28An MGB, I should say, a hatchback.
0:39:28 > 0:39:30- Not a hatchback, sorry - a soft top.- Yeah.
0:39:30 > 0:39:31But all cars before I was born...
0:39:31 > 0:39:33When I was born, it all got a bit sensible.
0:39:33 > 0:39:35She had a Mini, which was great.
0:39:35 > 0:39:38- Cos that was my first car. - Was it?- Yeah.
0:39:38 > 0:39:40Your first car was actually a proper Mini, then?
0:39:40 > 0:39:41- A little Mini.- Crash it?
0:39:41 > 0:39:44No, but I did reverse after a night out
0:39:44 > 0:39:46over a very large rock on a driveway
0:39:46 > 0:39:50and the gearstick just went, "Thunk," right through the chassis of the car.
0:39:50 > 0:39:52So, next car was a...?
0:39:53 > 0:39:56- A Golf Mitsubishi Colt from 1982, hatchback.- A Golf?
0:39:56 > 0:39:59Yeah. No, not a Golf, sorry. Mitsubishi Colt.
0:39:59 > 0:40:01- So, your MGT and a Golf Mitsubishi!- Yeah!
0:40:03 > 0:40:06I'm getting my... I'm cross-splicing in some future world of cars!
0:40:06 > 0:40:08There's a lot of car jumbling going on!
0:40:08 > 0:40:11It's a good job I don't do your job - I'd be rubbish at it.
0:40:11 > 0:40:13It's a good job I don't do yours -
0:40:13 > 0:40:16I've no idea how to fly a spaceship or punch anyone.
0:40:16 > 0:40:19- Or act.- That can be taught. I got taught that.- What, how to punch?
0:40:19 > 0:40:21Yeah. Hollywood fu, it was great fun.
0:40:21 > 0:40:25Do you punch like... Do you punch with that side of your hand?
0:40:25 > 0:40:27- What are you doing?- When you punch.
0:40:27 > 0:40:30You look like you're trying to wipe a windscreen or something.
0:40:30 > 0:40:33No, when you punch somebody, cos I've often... You sometimes...
0:40:33 > 0:40:35Normally, you're quite tight and it's all from the waist,
0:40:35 > 0:40:39but you have to sell it a bit more for the camera, so you arc it round a bit.
0:40:39 > 0:40:42You could try it. Shall we try it now? Shall we try a fake punch?
0:40:42 > 0:40:44AUDIENCE: Yeah!
0:40:44 > 0:40:46What if it turns into a real one?
0:40:46 > 0:40:48I'll give and you receive.
0:40:48 > 0:40:51LAUGHTER
0:40:51 > 0:40:52I like being the dominant one.
0:40:52 > 0:40:54- So, there's the camera.- That one?
0:40:54 > 0:40:57- Facing me.- You're actually directing now!- Yeah!- Facing you...
0:40:57 > 0:40:59- Am I ready for this punch?- Yeah.
0:40:59 > 0:41:03- When I get to about there, you can move your head.- But what if I don't?
0:41:04 > 0:41:06I'm not going to do that.
0:41:06 > 0:41:09Is anybody... Your dry-cleaning bills when my nose...!
0:41:10 > 0:41:11- All right.- Are you ready?- Yes.
0:41:11 > 0:41:13OK, and...
0:41:13 > 0:41:16APPLAUSE
0:41:16 > 0:41:18Did that look all right? He knows, they know.
0:41:22 > 0:41:25We've had many actors on the show over the years, sitting there,
0:41:25 > 0:41:28but we've never had one who's been carjacked before.
0:41:28 > 0:41:30Oh, really? That's good.
0:41:30 > 0:41:32It is, but you were genuinely carjacked.
0:41:32 > 0:41:34I was genuinely carjacked. Yeah.
0:41:34 > 0:41:36Scary? How did it happen?
0:41:36 > 0:41:37It was very scary.
0:41:37 > 0:41:40I have to emphasise, not just because I love South Africa
0:41:40 > 0:41:42and South Africans,
0:41:42 > 0:41:45but it was a small event in a very big country, and we were very lucky.
0:41:45 > 0:41:48We were on a bumpy dirt track and had gone onto the N2,
0:41:48 > 0:41:51the major trunk road down the east coast,
0:41:51 > 0:41:55and the front right tyre blew and these guys surrounded us,
0:41:55 > 0:41:59stuff went on with belongings and we were pushed about a bit.
0:41:59 > 0:42:01I was put in the boot of the car, though, at one point,
0:42:01 > 0:42:03and that was interesting.
0:42:03 > 0:42:06I thought, "Maybe I could diffuse the brake lights,
0:42:06 > 0:42:07"then the police..."
0:42:07 > 0:42:10No, no policeman in South Africa is going to pull over a car
0:42:10 > 0:42:13full of men at midnight to question a broken taillight.
0:42:13 > 0:42:16But it was very scary.
0:42:16 > 0:42:20When they got you out again, did they not put a duvet over your head?
0:42:20 > 0:42:22At one point, stuff was being thrown out the car.
0:42:22 > 0:42:24We were underneath this underpass
0:42:24 > 0:42:27and these juggernauts were just charging over
0:42:27 > 0:42:30and the sound cover would be perfect for a quiet pop.
0:42:30 > 0:42:33Then this duvet got thrown out, just went over our head, and I thought,
0:42:33 > 0:42:35"Again, it's the pillow thing,
0:42:35 > 0:42:37"it's going to be a muffler for a gunshot."
0:42:37 > 0:42:39So I kind of came to terms with mortality
0:42:39 > 0:42:43and dying on my own about four times in the space of half an hour.
0:42:43 > 0:42:45The whole thing went on for about two hours.
0:42:45 > 0:42:48- We mustn't put people off southern Africa.- No, we mustn't.
0:42:48 > 0:42:49- It's a big, beautiful place.- It is.
0:42:49 > 0:42:52- So we could just ignore all that, it doesn't really happen!- Cut that!
0:42:53 > 0:42:57- Anyway, so, you came down here to do your lap.- Oh,- BLEEP!
0:42:58 > 0:43:01- And how was it out there? - It was really good fun.
0:43:01 > 0:43:03The first couple of laps, I couldn't see the wood for the trees,
0:43:03 > 0:43:05but as it went on, I think I got...
0:43:05 > 0:43:06I bettered my times later on,
0:43:06 > 0:43:09- so I was obviously learning something.- How do you know?
0:43:09 > 0:43:10People would go, "Mmm."
0:43:10 > 0:43:12Oh, just from people's "Mmm"?
0:43:12 > 0:43:16I'm told you did more laps than any guest we've had.
0:43:16 > 0:43:18Oh, that's so shaming!
0:43:18 > 0:43:20Who'd like to see the fastest lap?
0:43:20 > 0:43:21AUDIENCE: Yeah!
0:43:22 > 0:43:25- Let's have a look.- OK.
0:43:25 > 0:43:26Oh, yes.
0:43:29 > 0:43:30- Yippee ki-yay,- mother-BLEEP!
0:43:32 > 0:43:35A fan of The Hangover is here!
0:43:35 > 0:43:39Look at it grip, the mighty Tech Line with a lifetime warranty.
0:43:41 > 0:43:44- That's not bad. - Is that all right?- Yeah.
0:43:44 > 0:43:46It is hot in here.
0:43:46 > 0:43:48That's no excuse, come on.
0:43:48 > 0:43:51- Did you have the air conditioning off or on?- Off.- Good man.
0:43:51 > 0:43:55A bit wide through there, maybe costing you half a second.
0:43:55 > 0:43:59Gear change, gear change, gear change, gear change. So...boom.
0:44:01 > 0:44:05- Yeah, like the Sundance Kid there, very quick mover!- Oh, God!
0:44:07 > 0:44:09Bit slow, but at least you're not skidding about.
0:44:09 > 0:44:12You haven't really used all the track - or, indeed, any of it. Anyway...
0:44:12 > 0:44:16- AS OBI-WAN KENOBI:- Use the track, Benedict.
0:44:17 > 0:44:22Ladies and gentlemen, Alec Guinness in the Reasonably Priced Car!
0:44:22 > 0:44:23Moved those, that was well done.
0:44:23 > 0:44:26And now here it is, second-to-last corner.
0:44:26 > 0:44:27Holy crap, this is scary.
0:44:27 > 0:44:30- No, that is pretty much perfect.- Is it?
0:44:30 > 0:44:33That really is perfect, Gambon.
0:44:33 > 0:44:37Ooh, fast. Ooh, fast, but not Jimmy Carr. Across the line!
0:44:37 > 0:44:39APPLAUSE
0:44:41 > 0:44:44- Ah, not bad!- That is all right. That is all right.
0:44:47 > 0:44:51These are the times we have so far in our Reasonably Priced Car.
0:44:51 > 0:44:53- Ooh, crikey. - Where do we think?
0:44:53 > 0:44:55I don't know, I don't know.
0:44:55 > 0:44:57Maybe faster than Warwick, I'd be happy with that.
0:44:57 > 0:45:00Faster than Warwick, at 1.46.8.
0:45:00 > 0:45:03- That's where you're aiming. - That's very high, isn't it?
0:45:03 > 0:45:07Benedict Cumberbatch, you...are leaning forwards.
0:45:07 > 0:45:08LAUGHTER
0:45:08 > 0:45:10It won't make my time faster, will it?!
0:45:10 > 0:45:13I haven't got much space left on here!
0:45:13 > 0:45:14Then shorten the time!
0:45:14 > 0:45:16LAUGHTER
0:45:16 > 0:45:17You did it in one...
0:45:19 > 0:45:21..40...
0:45:23 > 0:45:25LAUGHTER
0:45:26 > 0:45:29..7.8.
0:45:29 > 0:45:30- Oh!- So you're not faster.
0:45:32 > 0:45:33APPLAUSE
0:45:37 > 0:45:40- I can live with that. - It's in the middle.
0:45:41 > 0:45:44What I've got here is a list of all the other people who've
0:45:44 > 0:45:45appeared on Star Trek.
0:45:45 > 0:45:48If it makes you feel any better,
0:45:48 > 0:45:51- Jean-Luc Picard, 1.50 dead. - Oh, dear.
0:45:51 > 0:45:53So you're faster than he was.
0:45:53 > 0:45:57But the previous baddie in the last film, Eric Bana, 1.47.5,
0:45:57 > 0:45:59and that was in the wet.
0:45:59 > 0:46:01- Phwoar.- So Eric Bana is faster.
0:46:01 > 0:46:03I can't really find any comfort at all for you.
0:46:03 > 0:46:05I've just got to come back, you've got to invite me back.
0:46:05 > 0:46:08I basically brought you down here and ruined your day.
0:46:08 > 0:46:09- Yeah, yeah!- I do apologise for that,
0:46:09 > 0:46:12- because it has been an enormous pleasure.- Likewise, thank you.
0:46:12 > 0:46:15Best of luck with the new Sherlock, absolute joy.
0:46:15 > 0:46:18Ladies and gentlemen, Benedict Cumberbatch.
0:46:18 > 0:46:21CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:46:24 > 0:46:31Now, tonight, we are heading for Madrid in three convertible supercars.
0:46:31 > 0:46:34So far, we've found Spain to be full of brand-new things that
0:46:34 > 0:46:36nobody seems to be using.
0:46:36 > 0:46:39Absolutely. We spent the night in an unwanted house,
0:46:39 > 0:46:43where Jeremy had cooked us dinner.
0:46:43 > 0:46:45Anyway, we rejoin the action the following morning.
0:46:52 > 0:46:55'After a hectic night on the lavatory, we headed off.
0:46:56 > 0:46:58'But after just 100 yards...'
0:47:00 > 0:47:01Oh, I've ruined my Ferrari.
0:47:03 > 0:47:05'..I hit a bollard.
0:47:05 > 0:47:09'Luckily, though, my colleagues didn't make a big deal of it.'
0:47:09 > 0:47:13Hammond, look out for that signpost dead ahead of you. Hammond, careful.
0:47:13 > 0:47:15Block of flats on the right.
0:47:15 > 0:47:17Please kill me.
0:47:17 > 0:47:23Breaking a Ferrari is an especially bad thing.
0:47:23 > 0:47:26It's like kicking a rabbit.
0:47:26 > 0:47:28Hammond, when we get on the motorway,
0:47:28 > 0:47:30you'll be driving quite fast,
0:47:30 > 0:47:33it might be 70 miles an hour, you'll really need to concentrate there.
0:47:40 > 0:47:42Hammond, move right, mind the Armco.
0:47:42 > 0:47:43They're never going to give up.
0:47:46 > 0:47:49'Sure enough, the abuse kept on coming.'
0:47:50 > 0:47:54- Two big metal pillars, Hammond. Don't... Do you see them?- Mind that!
0:47:54 > 0:47:56- That way!- You're all right.
0:47:59 > 0:48:04'Happily, after several uneventful miles on yet another empty motorway,
0:48:04 > 0:48:06'we were finally approaching Madrid.'
0:48:10 > 0:48:13I know capital cities often escape the worst of austerity times
0:48:13 > 0:48:16like these, so hopefully that'll still be a busy old place.
0:48:18 > 0:48:20'However...'
0:48:33 > 0:48:34Holy God.
0:48:35 > 0:48:36Look at it.
0:48:39 > 0:48:40There are thousands of them.
0:48:45 > 0:48:49This crash was clearly bigger than ever I realised.
0:48:53 > 0:48:56Still, look on the upside - there's no-one for Hammond to run over.
0:48:59 > 0:49:02'And that thought gave me yet another brilliant idea.'
0:49:04 > 0:49:07Nobody is driving on that road.
0:49:07 > 0:49:11- So what are you suggesting? - Or that road.
0:49:11 > 0:49:16What I'm saying is, we turn this town into a street circuit.
0:49:16 > 0:49:20Ship The Stig out, he sets a time in a car of some sort
0:49:20 > 0:49:22and we try and match it.
0:49:22 > 0:49:24It's an ambitious plan.
0:49:24 > 0:49:25How hard can it be?
0:49:25 > 0:49:29- A few tyres, bits of barrier. - That's an excellent grandstand.
0:49:29 > 0:49:33All the residents - if there were any - could sit on those balconies and watch.
0:49:33 > 0:49:36Bernie Ecclestone will now be leaning forward in his chair and going,
0:49:36 > 0:49:38"Good idea."
0:49:38 > 0:49:41This is the Madrid Grand Prix, coming up.
0:49:42 > 0:49:44'Having sorted out a course,
0:49:44 > 0:49:47'James and I set about making it into an actual track.'
0:49:50 > 0:49:53I can't do them regular if you're going that fast!
0:49:54 > 0:49:56- It's uphill.- Yeah. - Keep going!- Yeah, yeah.
0:49:59 > 0:50:01This is Ferrari rosso.
0:50:01 > 0:50:03So when you crash into it,
0:50:03 > 0:50:06this will effectively repair the damage you've done to your car.
0:50:08 > 0:50:11'Because of my problem with manual labour,
0:50:11 > 0:50:12'I went off to collect The Stig.'
0:50:20 > 0:50:21So, this is the start, yeah?
0:50:23 > 0:50:25Careful. So this one goes...
0:50:25 > 0:50:29James, just do them when I'm...
0:50:30 > 0:50:32..getting the...
0:50:32 > 0:50:35- No! That's...- What the bloody hell?
0:50:37 > 0:50:38Oops.
0:50:38 > 0:50:40Ah, he's here.
0:50:40 > 0:50:42The Stig's here.
0:50:42 > 0:50:43Is he all right?
0:50:47 > 0:50:52'With the circuit complete and christened, we unwrapped The Stig
0:50:52 > 0:50:56'so he could set a benchmark time in a supercharged Jaguar convertible.'
0:50:59 > 0:51:03- Right, are you ready with the stopwatch, James May?- Yes, I am.
0:51:03 > 0:51:05Bradley Cooper will start it.
0:51:05 > 0:51:08Three, two, one!
0:51:08 > 0:51:11ENGINE ROARS
0:51:11 > 0:51:13That's a dirty, dirty sound.
0:51:19 > 0:51:22Oh, look at that! He's got his tail out,
0:51:22 > 0:51:24going round the Rockery of Gibraltar.
0:51:27 > 0:51:29'Because this was a street circuit,
0:51:29 > 0:51:31'it was lined with wheel-killing kerbs.
0:51:34 > 0:51:35'And there was even a speed hump.
0:51:38 > 0:51:40'But these things were of no moment to The Stig.'
0:51:47 > 0:51:52- Whoa!- 57 and a half seconds.
0:51:52 > 0:51:54Right!
0:51:56 > 0:51:57ENGINES ROAR
0:51:59 > 0:52:02'We then set off on a sighting lap,
0:52:02 > 0:52:04'knowing that if we wanted to beat The Stig,
0:52:04 > 0:52:08'we'd have to average at least 60 miles an hour.'
0:52:10 > 0:52:11That is alarming there.
0:52:12 > 0:52:15'Even though our cars were faster than the Jag,
0:52:15 > 0:52:16'it looked like a tall order.'
0:52:20 > 0:52:23OK, here we go, this is it, you and me, little Ferrari.
0:52:23 > 0:52:26Now's our chance, give it everything you've got.
0:52:28 > 0:52:29Three, two, one!
0:52:34 > 0:52:35Really fast start.
0:52:40 > 0:52:43On the limiter, round the Rockery of Gibraltar.
0:52:53 > 0:52:55Turn it. This thing will grip, Richard.
0:53:02 > 0:53:04Left that late. Back on the power as soon as you can.
0:53:08 > 0:53:10That was quick.
0:53:10 > 0:53:12Now, the chicane. This is monstrous.
0:53:21 > 0:53:23Then, thread it through. That is tight.
0:53:27 > 0:53:30And now the final straight, up towards the finish line.
0:53:32 > 0:53:34This is all I've got, everything I can.
0:53:36 > 0:53:44Little Fezza, I really hope I've made up for crashing you this morning.
0:53:49 > 0:53:52'With my work done, it was Mr Slowly's turn.'
0:53:53 > 0:53:56Three, two, one!
0:53:56 > 0:53:57ENGINE ROARS
0:53:58 > 0:53:59Ooh, it sounds second!
0:54:01 > 0:54:03Third!
0:54:03 > 0:54:05James May, ladies and gentlemen, hit third!
0:54:11 > 0:54:15There's a left-hander somewhere. There it is. Throw him in.
0:54:22 > 0:54:24Lord Howard of Effingham.
0:54:26 > 0:54:29- Oh, tricky gear change with the gear... Oh,- BLEEP!
0:54:33 > 0:54:35No-one expects the Spanish speed hump.
0:54:44 > 0:54:45Nice and straight.
0:54:48 > 0:54:50Nearly bloody killed me.
0:54:54 > 0:54:56'Finally, it was the turn of the McLaren.'
0:54:59 > 0:55:01Active, aero, sport.
0:55:01 > 0:55:02Well, this is it.
0:55:04 > 0:55:05Three, two, one!
0:55:09 > 0:55:11Whoa, that was launch control!
0:55:16 > 0:55:18Concentrate, Jeremy, concentrate.
0:55:20 > 0:55:21Oh, no!
0:55:23 > 0:55:24Massive tail slide there!
0:55:27 > 0:55:29And on to the Golden Hind straight.
0:55:33 > 0:55:3691 miles an hour there. Down to second.
0:55:59 > 0:56:00Come on, power!
0:56:04 > 0:56:05Oooh!
0:56:08 > 0:56:09THEY LAUGH
0:56:13 > 0:56:18I have to say, our street circuit was a million times better
0:56:18 > 0:56:23- than Spain's other one in Valencia. It's one of the most boring street circuits in the world.- Yeah.
0:56:23 > 0:56:26- The only problem I had was, you know the Lord Howard of Effingham chicane?- Yes.
0:56:26 > 0:56:27You really wanted first,
0:56:27 > 0:56:31but I couldn't ever get it in the McLaren. Trying to jam it down.
0:56:31 > 0:56:35- The problem I had is when you get to the "no-one expects the Spanish speed hump".- Yeah.
0:56:35 > 0:56:38You had to go wide and try to hit it reasonably square, cos if you got it at an angle,
0:56:38 > 0:56:42- you'd be banged into the kerb. - And then, you'd smash your wheel off!- Yeah, absolutely.- Yes, yes!
0:56:42 > 0:56:45Anyway, I have the results here.
0:56:45 > 0:56:47And the...well, there's no other way to put this...
0:56:47 > 0:56:49HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
0:56:49 > 0:56:53..the fastest car around our magnificent track was...
0:56:53 > 0:56:56- the Ferrari! Yeah, it was!- It wasn't.
0:56:56 > 0:56:57LAUGHTER
0:56:57 > 0:56:59No, it was, cos if you look, there's the numbers
0:56:59 > 0:57:02next to the names, the one next to mine is the smallest, that means...
0:57:02 > 0:57:06No, no, Hammond. The Ferrari was the fastest in the first lap.
0:57:06 > 0:57:10- Well, it was a one-lap event. - It wasn't a one-lap event!
0:57:10 > 0:57:13No, cos then, we parcel the cameras away, OK,
0:57:13 > 0:57:16and then we kept going, as you remember, and by the end,
0:57:16 > 0:57:19the McLaren was not just faster than the Ferrari,
0:57:19 > 0:57:22but faster than The Stig.
0:57:22 > 0:57:25But that wasn't the end, because then The Stig went out again in the Jag
0:57:25 > 0:57:29- and was faster than the McLaren.- Yes. - Hang on, that wasn't the end either, because, if you remember,
0:57:29 > 0:57:32it then started raining and in the rain, the Audi was the fastest
0:57:32 > 0:57:35because of its four-wheel drive. So...
0:57:35 > 0:57:37This isn't very good, is it?
0:57:37 > 0:57:39Well, it's not very clear.
0:57:39 > 0:57:41No, what we're saying is, at various different points,
0:57:41 > 0:57:43- all of them were the fastest.- Yeah.
0:57:43 > 0:57:46Anyway, I've got the results of everything over here,
0:57:46 > 0:57:47all the categories.
0:57:47 > 0:57:51And speed, yes, we decided that was a dead heat for all three.
0:57:51 > 0:57:54- Well, no, I mean, on the night, it was the Ferrari. - It wasn't the Ferrari...
0:57:54 > 0:57:57- It was a one-lap event...- It was the McLa...- Would you two shut up?
0:57:57 > 0:58:00LAUGHTER
0:58:00 > 0:58:05Quietness, that was also a dead heat between the Audi and the McLaren.
0:58:05 > 0:58:08Discretion, the Audi.
0:58:08 > 0:58:10Economy, that was the Audi.
0:58:10 > 0:58:12Value was the Audi, but...
0:58:12 > 0:58:15finally, equipment...
0:58:15 > 0:58:16that was the Audi.
0:58:16 > 0:58:18LAUGHTER
0:58:18 > 0:58:19A bit clearer, isn't it?
0:58:19 > 0:58:22- Fairly comprehensive win there for the Audi.- Uh-huh.
0:58:22 > 0:58:25So, James May, of the three cars, knowing what we know now,
0:58:25 > 0:58:28which would you choose to buy?
0:58:28 > 0:58:29The Ferrari.
0:58:29 > 0:58:31LAUGHTER
0:58:31 > 0:58:32- Yeah, it's the Ferrari.- And you?
0:58:32 > 0:58:35- Uh...McLaren.- Interesting. Really?
0:58:35 > 0:58:38- No, I'd have the Ferrari.- Good.
0:58:38 > 0:58:40I mean, the McLaren is absolutely brilliant,
0:58:40 > 0:58:43but the Ferrari is just a little bit more special.
0:58:43 > 0:58:46So what we're finally saying is we'd all three have a car
0:58:46 > 0:58:49that dissolves if you drive it too quickly.
0:58:49 > 0:58:51LAUGHTER
0:58:51 > 0:58:52ALL: Yes, yes.
0:58:52 > 0:58:54But on that bombshell, we can end.
0:58:54 > 0:58:56Thank you very much for watching.
0:58:56 > 0:58:59See you all again next week. Take care, good night!
0:58:59 > 0:59:02CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:59:23 > 0:59:26Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd