0:00:18 > 0:00:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:24 > 0:00:27Hello, and welcome to Top Gear. Let's play
0:00:27 > 0:00:30who forgot to sign the producer's birthday card?
0:00:30 > 0:00:34Here's a clue. On tonight's show I drive one of the fastest cars of all
0:00:34 > 0:00:38time, Chris drives one of the most iconic cars of all time,
0:00:38 > 0:00:41and Rory drives a Kia.
0:00:41 > 0:00:42LAUGHTER
0:00:42 > 0:00:46- All you had to do was sign your name, Rory.- Yeah. I know.
0:00:46 > 0:00:48- Thanks.- That was literally all you had to do.
0:00:48 > 0:00:52- I know!- Now, we all know the car world is full of outrageous claims.
0:00:52 > 0:00:56For example, Chris Harris still insists he's five foot eight.
0:00:56 > 0:00:59- He isn't.- Well, you're not five foot ten, are you?
0:01:08 > 0:01:12All right. Now, here's another outrageous claim from Dodge.
0:01:12 > 0:01:16Dodge says it's built a car that will outrun anything on
0:01:16 > 0:01:18the planet. Like these.
0:01:18 > 0:01:20HE SNIGGERS
0:01:20 > 0:01:24And, apparently, you can buy this fastest car
0:01:24 > 0:01:26in the world for 84,995,
0:01:26 > 0:01:28that's about £60,000.
0:01:28 > 0:01:30I'm five foot ten, Chris!
0:01:42 > 0:01:43It's called the Demon...
0:01:45 > 0:01:48..and, as you can see, it doesn't look like a supercar.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51It looks like a muscle car.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53A muscle car with a muscle car motor.
0:01:56 > 0:01:57ENGINE ROARS AND RASPS
0:01:57 > 0:02:02A big, noisy, 6.2 litre V8 with a big, noisy,
0:02:02 > 0:02:05supercharger strapped to the top.
0:02:05 > 0:02:09In fact, the biggest supercharger ever found on a production car.
0:02:09 > 0:02:10SUPERCHARGER WHIRS
0:02:10 > 0:02:13Oh, yeah! Listen to it scream!
0:02:15 > 0:02:18It sounds like Satan passing a kidney stone.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22That might be the most addictive throttle pedal
0:02:22 > 0:02:24I have ever experienced.
0:02:27 > 0:02:31And, as you'd expect from a car that's limited to 168mph...
0:02:33 > 0:02:36..out on the road, the Demon does feel pretty fast.
0:02:39 > 0:02:42But supercar fast? Hyper car fast?
0:02:42 > 0:02:44I don't know.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47You know, this isn't some stripped down sports car,
0:02:47 > 0:02:50this is a big, comfy cruiser.
0:02:50 > 0:02:54Two metric tons of big, comfy cruiser, to be precise.
0:02:56 > 0:03:00There's no hybrid, energy recovery gizmo, there's just a big motor.
0:03:02 > 0:03:05And there's no supercar spec, double-clutch gearbox.
0:03:05 > 0:03:07It's just a big automatic.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12To be honest, it's kind of just a Dodge.
0:03:12 > 0:03:15But I've got to say, I've driven quite a few Dodges over the years,
0:03:15 > 0:03:17and they're not my favourite.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20The interiors are very plastic and cheap feeling.
0:03:23 > 0:03:26And, while it's no supercar on the inside,
0:03:26 > 0:03:28it doesn't corner like one either.
0:03:31 > 0:03:32Oh!
0:03:34 > 0:03:37If you try to go around this corner in the Demon as fast as you go
0:03:37 > 0:03:40around this corner in the LaFerrari, you wouldn't go around that corner.
0:03:42 > 0:03:43On a road like this,
0:03:43 > 0:03:46the Demon just would not see which way a supercar went.
0:03:46 > 0:03:48It pains me to say it, but it's true.
0:03:49 > 0:03:52So, there you go, question answered.
0:03:54 > 0:03:57For 84,995,
0:03:57 > 0:04:01you can't buy a car that will outrun anything else on the planet.
0:04:01 > 0:04:09However, for 84,996, you might just be able to.
0:04:14 > 0:04:16Because, when you buy a Demon,
0:04:16 > 0:04:20Dodge will also give you the option to spend 1 more
0:04:20 > 0:04:21on a crate of stuff.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23OK!
0:04:23 > 0:04:31You get tools, skinny front tyres, a high-flow air filter, a new ECU.
0:04:31 > 0:04:32Loads of cool stuff.
0:04:34 > 0:04:37Because Dodge didn't build the Demon to go quick on a winding,
0:04:37 > 0:04:40alpine pass or a tight street circuit. No, no.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43The Demon was made to do one thing.
0:04:43 > 0:04:46To tear up the drag strip, a quarter-mile at a time.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51Bolt all those crate parts on, feed it some decent fuel,
0:04:51 > 0:04:55and it will give you 840 horsepower.
0:04:56 > 0:05:01This is the most powerful V8 production car in history.
0:05:02 > 0:05:06Dodge says this car will run the standing quarter mile
0:05:06 > 0:05:07in 9.65 seconds,
0:05:07 > 0:05:12which, if you know your drag racing, you'll know is really, really fast.
0:05:12 > 0:05:16But if you don't know your drag racing, here's how it works.
0:05:20 > 0:05:22First, you need to warm the tyres.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29The Demon has a function called line lock, which brakes the front wheels,
0:05:29 > 0:05:31so you can spin up the rears.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34ALARM DINGS Oh, they're done.
0:05:36 > 0:05:38And, once you've warmed the tyres, you're ready to go.
0:05:40 > 0:05:42Well, almost.
0:05:42 > 0:05:45OK, so, to launch this thing is pretty easy.
0:05:45 > 0:05:49Left foot on the break, hold in both these paddles, add some revs,
0:05:49 > 0:05:54release one paddle, foot off the brake,
0:05:54 > 0:05:57release the other paddle as you bury the throttle.
0:05:57 > 0:05:58See, easy.
0:06:04 > 0:06:05Jesus Christ!
0:06:07 > 0:06:08That is incredible!
0:06:18 > 0:06:20That won't get old, ever.
0:06:21 > 0:06:24You literally could not fall off a cliff faster than that.
0:06:27 > 0:06:29Oh, hell, I'm doing that again.
0:06:31 > 0:06:32And you can.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37Because, unlike most cars with launch control,
0:06:37 > 0:06:39where you do a couple of full-bore starts,
0:06:39 > 0:06:42and then it has to go and lie down for a bit...
0:06:44 > 0:06:46..in making the Demon,
0:06:46 > 0:06:50Dodge had one do over 5,000 launches without a single glitch.
0:06:56 > 0:06:58That is addictive.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02OK. Now that I'm warmed up, how about a little race, huh?
0:07:06 > 0:07:12That is a Lamborghini Aventador, four-wheel drive, V12 engine,
0:07:12 > 0:07:14four times the price of the Demon.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19Let's do this.
0:07:27 > 0:07:30I've just roasted that Lambo!
0:07:35 > 0:07:39Damn! That is big American balls, baby!
0:07:39 > 0:07:42Big, fat, American ice cubes.
0:07:42 > 0:07:45Is that a Lamborghini way back there?
0:07:45 > 0:07:47I think it is!
0:07:49 > 0:07:52When you hook everything up right,
0:07:52 > 0:07:54you know how fast this car does zero to 60?
0:07:54 > 0:07:572.3 seconds.
0:07:57 > 0:08:02This is the fastest accelerating road car in history.
0:08:03 > 0:08:07So, there you go, if you're the kind of person who wants to live life
0:08:07 > 0:08:09a quarter mile at a time,
0:08:09 > 0:08:12you don't want a couple of hundred grand supercar,
0:08:12 > 0:08:13you want a Demon.
0:08:13 > 0:08:17And if you think driving very fast in a straight line
0:08:17 > 0:08:19is a bit pointless,
0:08:19 > 0:08:24you'd be wrong. Because the Demon's very specific set of skills makes it
0:08:24 > 0:08:28the ultimate candidate for the coolest job in the world.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33Back in the '50s, in the depths of the Cold War,
0:08:33 > 0:08:36America launched the Lockheed U-2.
0:08:36 > 0:08:39Designed to cruise at 70,000 feet,
0:08:39 > 0:08:42twice the altitude of a commercial jet,
0:08:42 > 0:08:45it was the ultimate spy plane.
0:08:45 > 0:08:48But, with its vast wingspan, poor visibility,
0:08:48 > 0:08:54and lack of proper landing gear, it was a pig to land.
0:08:54 > 0:08:56In fact, the military found the only safe way
0:08:56 > 0:08:58to bring the U-2 down was to
0:08:58 > 0:09:01have a radio spotter chase it down the runway, in a car.
0:09:03 > 0:09:06And because the U-2 comes in at over 100mph,
0:09:06 > 0:09:09that meant using a muscle car.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11Zoom, zoom.
0:09:11 > 0:09:1560 years later, the U-2 has been redesigned,
0:09:15 > 0:09:19and modified in the name of environmental science, by Nasa.
0:09:19 > 0:09:25It's now known as the ER-2, and it is still a pig to land.
0:09:25 > 0:09:28And that's where me and the Demon come in.
0:09:28 > 0:09:31What better way to land the world's hardest-to-land aeroplane
0:09:31 > 0:09:33than with the world's fastest-accelerating car?
0:09:35 > 0:09:36Only one way to find out.
0:09:38 > 0:09:42So, with the ER-2 taking off on an eight-hour mission to research
0:09:42 > 0:09:45volcanoes and glaciers and stuff,
0:09:45 > 0:09:48I was sent for a briefing with Nasa pilot Dean Neeley.
0:09:48 > 0:09:50Call sign, Gucci,
0:09:50 > 0:09:53who did nothing to settle my nerves.
0:09:53 > 0:09:54When he goes up there today,
0:09:54 > 0:09:57he's going to be the highest man in the world, off for hours and hours,
0:09:57 > 0:10:02flying 13 miles above the earth, and coming back, exhausted, dehydrated,
0:10:02 > 0:10:05in an aeroplane that's really like landing a motorcycle coming off of
0:10:05 > 0:10:10a jump. So, we've got to always be ready to expect the unexpected.
0:10:10 > 0:10:11All right, next slide.
0:10:12 > 0:10:16OK, we're going to do our primary duty, which is being visible to him,
0:10:16 > 0:10:19where we roll in behind him and get in position to feed him
0:10:19 > 0:10:21useful information.
0:10:21 > 0:10:23And, then, as you're accelerating straight ahead, toward him,
0:10:23 > 0:10:25fade in right behind his six o'clock position,
0:10:25 > 0:10:27looking right down the tailpipe.
0:10:27 > 0:10:30What Dean was very thoroughly suggesting
0:10:30 > 0:10:33was that I accelerate onto the runway at 140mph,
0:10:33 > 0:10:37right up behind the ER-2's jet engine exhaust,
0:10:37 > 0:10:39while talking the pilot down over the radio.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Piece of cake.
0:10:43 > 0:10:46Eight, six, four, two...
0:10:46 > 0:10:48..two, two...
0:10:49 > 0:10:52..one. The only thing that we can fail at today
0:10:52 > 0:10:53is hit the main gear first,
0:10:53 > 0:10:57because he'll skip back into the air. And he'll stall.
0:10:57 > 0:10:59And then you get the cartwheel manoeuvre, and it's ugly.
0:10:59 > 0:11:00Yeah.
0:11:03 > 0:11:07So, with the pilot now hard at work on the edge of space,
0:11:07 > 0:11:11and still not 100% clear on what I was supposed to do,
0:11:11 > 0:11:15Dean set up some practice runs, where, instead of the plane,
0:11:15 > 0:11:17we'd be chasing down a car.
0:11:20 > 0:11:23You never know, he may come down fine, and it would be no issue,
0:11:23 > 0:11:27or he may do some manoeuvre that kind of surprises you.
0:11:27 > 0:11:29He's going to count on your immediate response
0:11:29 > 0:11:31to guide him back where he needs to be.
0:11:31 > 0:11:32So, that's the critical part of this.
0:11:34 > 0:11:36And with time running out on the ER-2's mission,
0:11:36 > 0:11:38the pressure was on to get it right.
0:11:40 > 0:11:41Meet, Gucci, hit it.
0:11:47 > 0:11:48There you go, go get him.
0:11:58 > 0:12:01OK. You're on your own, you're on your own.
0:12:03 > 0:12:06It's tricky to get out there that quick.
0:12:06 > 0:12:09What was becoming obvious was that to land the ER-2,
0:12:09 > 0:12:13the drag strip-honed Demon would have to corner at speed.
0:12:13 > 0:12:15OK.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17This was going to take practice.
0:12:32 > 0:12:33Let's try that again.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36Nice job, Meet, how about one more, same thing?
0:12:43 > 0:12:45Oh, that's a lot of power, OK.
0:12:45 > 0:12:49I was just starting to wrestle the Demon into line...
0:12:51 > 0:12:55..when all too soon, the call came in.
0:12:55 > 0:12:57The ER-2 was making its descent.
0:13:00 > 0:13:03Remember, the whole goal is for you to be in position,
0:13:03 > 0:13:05where you can give him good instructions.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07So, it's pretty much now or never.
0:13:07 > 0:13:10OK, so this guy's life is in my hands for about 30 seconds.
0:13:10 > 0:13:11- Right?- That's right.
0:13:15 > 0:13:20SA-06, runway 22, wing 240, vector 1-5, cleared to land.
0:13:22 > 0:13:23Nasa Mobile, cleared to follow.
0:13:23 > 0:13:25Here we go.
0:13:25 > 0:13:27About 20 seconds until we go.
0:13:34 > 0:13:35ENGINE REVS
0:13:41 > 0:13:43Three, two, one...
0:13:43 > 0:13:45..hit it.
0:13:51 > 0:13:52Get in there.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58- 15...- Get it, you're losing it.
0:14:06 > 0:14:07OK, eight...
0:14:12 > 0:14:14..four...
0:14:14 > 0:14:16..four...
0:14:18 > 0:14:20..four...
0:14:20 > 0:14:23..two, two..
0:14:23 > 0:14:25..two...
0:14:29 > 0:14:31..and down. Nice job. Nice job!
0:14:34 > 0:14:35Good landing.
0:14:36 > 0:14:40- That is good stuff.- That's exactly what you needed to do.
0:14:40 > 0:14:41It's huge.
0:14:44 > 0:14:47Gucci, do you recommend we hire him with additional training?
0:14:47 > 0:14:49All right, man. I think you got it.
0:14:50 > 0:14:56The Dodge Demon, the 85-grand, undisputed king of the drag strip.
0:14:56 > 0:15:00And now proven at Nasa.
0:15:04 > 0:15:07- A mega car. - Yeah, that was a lot of fun.
0:15:09 > 0:15:10That looked pretty intense.
0:15:12 > 0:15:14Honestly, were you scared?
0:15:14 > 0:15:17Well, come on, your country comes calling, you answer the call.
0:15:17 > 0:15:21Land a Nasa plane, take down a few bad guys, whatever.
0:15:21 > 0:15:24- Terrified, then.- Yeah, I've never been more scared in my life!
0:15:25 > 0:15:27And, plus, if I didn't get the guy down alive,
0:15:27 > 0:15:30the wine and cheese thing with his family would have been awkward.
0:15:30 > 0:15:33Yeah, but at least you didn't crash the Nasa spy plane.
0:15:33 > 0:15:37Yeah, OK, Chris, Nasa was very clear, it is not a spy plane.
0:15:37 > 0:15:38Right, because if you've got a spy plane,
0:15:38 > 0:15:41that's the one thing you don't call it, isn't it, a spy plane?
0:15:43 > 0:15:45It's a research plane.
0:15:45 > 0:15:48Research is a polite word for spying, you know that.
0:15:48 > 0:15:52OK, all right, I'm sorry, can we please talk about the Dodge Demon?
0:15:52 > 0:15:55- OK.- 85,000, £60,000, for a car that's faster than
0:15:55 > 0:15:57a Lamborghini Aventador.
0:15:57 > 0:16:02Yeah, in a straight line. Yeah, it does, literally, one thing.
0:16:02 > 0:16:03What's wrong with doing one thing?
0:16:03 > 0:16:08Did anyone care if Neil Armstrong was a good salsa dancer?
0:16:08 > 0:16:10No. We wanted him focused on the moon stuff.
0:16:10 > 0:16:12It's a one trick pony, the Demon.
0:16:12 > 0:16:14So what? So what?
0:16:14 > 0:16:17You show me a pony that can do zero to 60 in 2.3 seconds,
0:16:17 > 0:16:19and I will buy that pony.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21Rory.
0:16:21 > 0:16:24Now, it's time to talk South Korean cars
0:16:24 > 0:16:26because they are taking over Britain.
0:16:26 > 0:16:31Last year, Hyundai and Kia sold nearly 200,000 cars over here,
0:16:31 > 0:16:33and no-one even noticed.
0:16:33 > 0:16:37Because all South Korean cars are really, really boring.
0:16:37 > 0:16:39Well, nearly all...
0:16:44 > 0:16:46Now, this is a surprise.
0:16:48 > 0:16:52South Korea has made a rear-wheel-drive performance car.
0:16:54 > 0:16:57It comes from Kia, and it's called...
0:16:57 > 0:16:58..the Stinger.
0:17:07 > 0:17:09Terrible name, serious car.
0:17:11 > 0:17:15365 horsepower of serious car.
0:17:17 > 0:17:21The Stinger will do zero to 60 in under five seconds.
0:17:21 > 0:17:2580, 90, 100.
0:17:26 > 0:17:27HE YELLS
0:17:34 > 0:17:37Flat out, it will do 168mph.
0:17:39 > 0:17:42It's the fastest Kia ever.
0:17:44 > 0:17:46OK, that's not really that impressive a boast,
0:17:46 > 0:17:47when you think about it,
0:17:47 > 0:17:49but you can only beat what's put in front of you.
0:17:51 > 0:17:54And it's certainly better in the bends than any Kia
0:17:54 > 0:17:57I've driven before. Heavy on the brakes into Hammerhead,
0:17:57 > 0:17:59throw it left, throw it right.
0:17:59 > 0:18:01Oh, yes!
0:18:01 > 0:18:04There's loads of power, loads of noise.
0:18:04 > 0:18:05A decent amount of grip.
0:18:07 > 0:18:11You can feel that momentum, pushing you out wide, but the tyres,
0:18:11 > 0:18:13they do hang on. Until, of course...
0:18:16 > 0:18:17..you switch everything off.
0:18:21 > 0:18:24Yes, it will go sideways, I'm doing skids...
0:18:25 > 0:18:27..in a Kia!
0:18:32 > 0:18:34It's like moonwalking, in brogues.
0:18:35 > 0:18:37It feels so wrong.
0:18:37 > 0:18:39And, yet, so right!
0:18:41 > 0:18:45This is the most memorable car to come out of South Korea since...
0:18:46 > 0:18:49I mean, that's the whole point, isn't it? It's a memorable car
0:18:49 > 0:18:51to come out of South Korea.
0:18:53 > 0:18:57The Stinger is, in many ways, a ground-breaking car.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00But, in many more ways, it isn't.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04When you think South Korea, you think tech,
0:19:04 > 0:19:06home of Samsung, LG,
0:19:06 > 0:19:11a country at the cutting edge of microchips, nanos and other small,
0:19:11 > 0:19:12complicated things.
0:19:12 > 0:19:17So, you might expect South Korea's take on the performance car
0:19:17 > 0:19:21to be a blue-sky thinking, outside-the-box shower of ideas.
0:19:21 > 0:19:24But the Stinger isn't a different take.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26It's old school.
0:19:26 > 0:19:31Under the bonnet, you won't find the next big thing in hybrid drive,
0:19:31 > 0:19:35but a very ordinary twin turbo, six-cylinder petrol engine.
0:19:37 > 0:19:40The whole car is very similar, in fact,
0:19:40 > 0:19:42to the fast saloons you can currently choose
0:19:42 > 0:19:45from Mercedes and BMW.
0:19:45 > 0:19:46And Audi.
0:19:48 > 0:19:52Kia has looked at what the Germans have done recently, and gone,
0:19:52 > 0:19:56"Oh, that's interesting, we'll do...we'll do, exactly that."
0:19:57 > 0:19:59Just not QUITE as well.
0:20:00 > 0:20:03For example, the centre console,
0:20:03 > 0:20:06this isn't so much imitation carbon fibre as
0:20:06 > 0:20:09imitation imitation carbon fibre.
0:20:09 > 0:20:14And these buttons down here, they're more Matalan than Mercedes.
0:20:15 > 0:20:19Yet, despite these slightly flimsy finishes, somehow,
0:20:19 > 0:20:24the Stinger weighs nearly two tonnes. This is not a light car.
0:20:25 > 0:20:28I mean, one way to look at that is that you are getting
0:20:28 > 0:20:31quite a lot of kilos for the cash.
0:20:31 > 0:20:35Until, that is, you find out how much it costs.
0:20:35 > 0:20:37£40,000.
0:20:37 > 0:20:40Which is quite a lot for a Kia.
0:20:40 > 0:20:44Now, don't get me wrong, the Stinger is a good car,
0:20:44 > 0:20:48a big...no, HUGE improvement over previous Kias.
0:20:48 > 0:20:52But if South Korea wants to take on Germany at its own game,
0:20:52 > 0:20:54they'll have to do better.
0:20:54 > 0:20:55So it's just as well...
0:20:57 > 0:20:58..they've sent backup.
0:21:13 > 0:21:18This is the i30 N, Hyundai's answer to the Golf GTI.
0:21:18 > 0:21:22Yes, as if a sporty Korean saloon wasn't weird enough,
0:21:22 > 0:21:25now Hyundai are going after Volkswagen
0:21:25 > 0:21:27and the greatest hot hatch of them all.
0:21:27 > 0:21:31Just like the Golf, it uses a two-litre turbo engine,
0:21:31 > 0:21:32driving the front wheels.
0:21:37 > 0:21:38Just like the Golf,
0:21:38 > 0:21:41it costs just under £30,000.
0:21:41 > 0:21:44And not just like the Golf...
0:21:44 > 0:21:45..it really is quite powerful.
0:21:46 > 0:21:51Yes, where the Golf GTI has to make do with 230 horsepower,
0:21:51 > 0:21:55the Hyundai develops 270.
0:21:55 > 0:21:58That is a hot, hot hatch.
0:21:58 > 0:21:590-60 takes six seconds.
0:21:59 > 0:22:05Top speed - limited to 155mph.
0:22:05 > 0:22:07Yeah!
0:22:07 > 0:22:10Oh, my God, that's quick.
0:22:11 > 0:22:15Hyundai's let its hair down. Had a couple of pina coladas.
0:22:15 > 0:22:18It turns out, they DO know how to party.
0:22:19 > 0:22:23The "N" stands for "Not as bad as you might think!"
0:22:25 > 0:22:27It is all good in here.
0:22:27 > 0:22:31Manual gearbox - good, adjustable suspension - good.
0:22:31 > 0:22:34Clever electronic differential thing between the front wheels.
0:22:34 > 0:22:36Good. Nice, sharp turning.
0:22:36 > 0:22:38This thing is a joy.
0:22:38 > 0:22:41In fact, I was wrong.
0:22:41 > 0:22:44The "N" doesn't stand for "Not as bad as you might think" -
0:22:44 > 0:22:47the "N" stands for "nutter"!
0:22:51 > 0:22:54Oh, I see. Let's have some fun.
0:22:55 > 0:22:57Right, late on the brakes, turn in.
0:22:58 > 0:23:01I'm going to get him on the exit. Yes!
0:23:01 > 0:23:03Too much sideways.
0:23:03 > 0:23:06Oh, listen to the exhaust.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08EXHAUST RUMBLES
0:23:08 > 0:23:10Oh, no, you don't.
0:23:10 > 0:23:11He's got me!
0:23:11 > 0:23:13Right, I'm going in quicker.
0:23:16 > 0:23:19Yes! Yes!
0:23:19 > 0:23:20Yes!
0:23:22 > 0:23:24Look at this! Look at this!
0:23:24 > 0:23:27What we have here is a world first.
0:23:27 > 0:23:30I'm having fun in a South Korean car!
0:23:30 > 0:23:32And together...
0:23:32 > 0:23:35All right, all right, truce. We're on the same side!
0:23:35 > 0:23:40..the i30 N and the Stinger raise a very important question.
0:23:40 > 0:23:43Where, after all this excitement,
0:23:43 > 0:23:45does this leave South Korea on the Top Gear
0:23:45 > 0:23:49International League Table Of Countries That Make The Fastest Car?
0:23:49 > 0:23:54Or TGILTOCTMTFC, for short.
0:23:54 > 0:23:56Well, check it out.
0:23:56 > 0:24:00Now, I'm expecting big things from Botswana,
0:24:00 > 0:24:02but, today, we're looking way,
0:24:02 > 0:24:04way up there.
0:24:04 > 0:24:08Using a highly sophisticated and scientific algorithm
0:24:08 > 0:24:12formulated by cross-referencing countries and car-makers
0:24:12 > 0:24:13that we could remember,
0:24:13 > 0:24:19I'm excited to reveal that the i30 N and the Stinger have pushed
0:24:19 > 0:24:22South Korea three places from 11th
0:24:22 > 0:24:25to eighth, leapfrogging Australia, Czechia,
0:24:25 > 0:24:28which is what the Czech Republic prefers to be known as these days,
0:24:28 > 0:24:30and Spain.
0:24:34 > 0:24:36I'll just put that there.
0:24:39 > 0:24:41This is highly precarious.
0:24:41 > 0:24:43We don't need Australia.
0:24:43 > 0:24:44Couldn't we get magnets?
0:24:45 > 0:24:47Right, I'll just hold it there.
0:24:47 > 0:24:50In your face, Spain.
0:24:50 > 0:24:51You know where they don't take siestas?
0:24:53 > 0:24:54South Korea.
0:24:54 > 0:24:56Right, can I get down, please?
0:24:59 > 0:25:02South Korea, then, is heading up in the world.
0:25:02 > 0:25:06Not so long ago, you couldn't have imagined Kia or Hyundai building
0:25:06 > 0:25:09a serious rival to a Vauxhall Corsa.
0:25:10 > 0:25:13And, now, here they are, taking on the best in the business.
0:25:13 > 0:25:16It's admirable stuff.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18But I know what you're expecting me to say here.
0:25:18 > 0:25:22You're expecting me to say, "Yes, well done, South Korea, good effort,
0:25:22 > 0:25:27"you've made great strides," and then tell you to buy German.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29And that is what I will tell you.
0:25:29 > 0:25:33For the Kia Stinger, it's missing that last bit of polish,
0:25:33 > 0:25:35that sprinkling of magic.
0:25:35 > 0:25:39It's just a bit too...fat.
0:25:42 > 0:25:44But the i30 N?
0:25:44 > 0:25:48Different story. Because, if it's this, or a base Golf GTI,
0:25:48 > 0:25:50I'm picking the Hyundai.
0:25:50 > 0:25:53More power, more speed, and, for me, more fun.
0:25:54 > 0:25:58With the i30 N, the South Koreans aren't just going up in the world...
0:25:59 > 0:26:01..they've arrived.
0:26:15 > 0:26:17- Good South Korean cars.- Great cars.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20Let's talk about the cars.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22So, we can forget about the Kia Stinger, right?
0:26:22 > 0:26:24Yeah, overhyped.
0:26:24 > 0:26:27But you're telling me you'd rather have that than a Golf GTI?
0:26:27 > 0:26:31- All day long.- So, that badge on your driveway
0:26:31 > 0:26:33rather than a Volkswagen badge?
0:26:33 > 0:26:35Yeah, I just, kind of, drive it, and park it up right against the house,
0:26:35 > 0:26:39- no-one can see it.- You know there's a badge on the back as well?
0:26:39 > 0:26:40I'll rent a garage, I don't know.
0:26:43 > 0:26:48So, Rory reckons the i30 N is better than a Golf GTI.
0:26:48 > 0:26:50Well, it's time to find out using science,
0:26:50 > 0:26:54as we hand over both cars to our in-house hot hatch connoisseurs,
0:26:54 > 0:26:57it's the Stig's teenage cousins!
0:26:59 > 0:27:01There they are, typical teenagers, five yards apart,
0:27:01 > 0:27:03still communicating by text.
0:27:08 > 0:27:11The Hyundai's got the jump off the line, but here comes the Golf.
0:27:11 > 0:27:13Terrible weather conditions.
0:27:14 > 0:27:16Side by side into the first corner.
0:27:17 > 0:27:20How is he staying ahead, that particular spotty Stig?
0:27:20 > 0:27:22Can you smell the Lynx Africa from here?
0:27:24 > 0:27:28The Golf still ahead at this point, the Golf has a power disadvantage,
0:27:28 > 0:27:30I don't know how it's still ahead, but it's doing a good job.
0:27:30 > 0:27:31Oh, a bit sideways there.
0:27:34 > 0:27:37Now, powering down the back straight, Golf still ahead.
0:27:43 > 0:27:45Round the Hammerhead.
0:27:45 > 0:27:47Come on, that Hyundai looks poised to me, here it comes.
0:27:47 > 0:27:49Here it comes, all attitude,
0:27:53 > 0:27:57Up the inside, now that's a fast move.
0:27:57 > 0:28:00Oh, my Lord. Look at that!
0:28:00 > 0:28:03Yeah, that's full Asbo spec, that is. Good driving.
0:28:06 > 0:28:08Second to last, and the Hyundai is out of sight now.
0:28:08 > 0:28:10So far apart.
0:28:10 > 0:28:12It's all over the place, under braking.
0:28:16 > 0:28:19Now we're going through Gambon, over the line,
0:28:19 > 0:28:21and that is a victory for the Hyundai.
0:28:21 > 0:28:22Impressive.
0:28:22 > 0:28:24APPLAUSE
0:28:25 > 0:28:26OK.
0:28:29 > 0:28:32Much as it pains me to admit it, you called it. You were right.
0:28:32 > 0:28:35- Mm-hm.- OK. So, a victory to the Hyundai, but what was the margin?
0:28:35 > 0:28:38The weather was terrible, OK, so don't judge them too harshly.
0:28:38 > 0:28:42The Volkswagen Golf GTI did it in a 1:39.3,
0:28:42 > 0:28:45which puts it somewhere down near the floorboards.
0:28:45 > 0:28:48Very wet though, don't forget that. The Hyundai, however...
0:28:51 > 0:28:53..a 134.6.
0:28:53 > 0:28:55- Get in!- That's an absolute...
0:28:57 > 0:28:59- That's a drubbing.- There you go.
0:28:59 > 0:29:02That's a crushing, crushing victory.
0:29:03 > 0:29:05Matthew?
0:29:05 > 0:29:07And now it's time to put not one but two stars
0:29:07 > 0:29:09in our Reasonably Fast Car.
0:29:09 > 0:29:13Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Dara O Briain, and Ed Byrne.
0:29:20 > 0:29:24All right, buddy. Welcome. Welcome, welcome, take a seat.
0:29:28 > 0:29:30Great to have you. Great to have you. Now, you guys
0:29:30 > 0:29:33are great friends, right? You were best man at each other's weddings?
0:29:33 > 0:29:36Yes, we were, yes.
0:29:36 > 0:29:39I mean, are we cueing up how naturally competitive we are?
0:29:39 > 0:29:42Or are you thinking because we are just pals, it's OK,
0:29:42 > 0:29:44- I'll be happy if he wins? I won't be.- He'll be raging.
0:29:44 > 0:29:46Everyone says that. "Oh, no big deal, no big deal."
0:29:46 > 0:29:49- And then when they get out there... - Well, he did that. That's the thing.
0:29:49 > 0:29:52He phoned me yesterday, we were on the phone to each other
0:29:52 > 0:29:54yesterday, he was all, "It doesn't matter. I'm not really
0:29:54 > 0:29:57"that fussed about it. We'll a laugh. The interview will be fun
0:29:57 > 0:29:58"and stuff. I don't really care about the lap."
0:29:58 > 0:30:01And I know as soon as he got behind the wheel, he was like,
0:30:01 > 0:30:03"So long as I'm faster than Ed!"
0:30:03 > 0:30:05Yeah, that's just to get you to let your guard down.
0:30:05 > 0:30:07Yeah. Exactly. It didn't work.
0:30:07 > 0:30:09- Did it not?- No.- So, you're both on tour at the moment?
0:30:09 > 0:30:12Yes. Separately, obviously.
0:30:12 > 0:30:14We overlap in Aberdeen and Newcastle.
0:30:14 > 0:30:16- Yeah.- In the same night.
0:30:16 > 0:30:18So, watch out!
0:30:20 > 0:30:23We are going to have some drinks in those cities.
0:30:24 > 0:30:26That will be pretty wild. We're both crisscrossing,
0:30:26 > 0:30:29so, we're both on the motorway a lot over the next while.
0:30:29 > 0:30:30How's it going? Good?
0:30:30 > 0:30:35It's going sweet, I'm on until June, with a show called Spoiler Alert.
0:30:35 > 0:30:38And I'm on until next year sometime. Voice Of Reason until next year,
0:30:38 > 0:30:40I started a little later than you.
0:30:40 > 0:30:42- Any competition there, like... - No. He's...
0:30:42 > 0:30:44I rock up to venues, and they're like,
0:30:44 > 0:30:47"Oh, yeah, Dara O Briain here for four nights, sold out last time."
0:30:47 > 0:30:50And I'm like, right, here's me struggling to just about
0:30:50 > 0:30:54fill it once. I know my place. Hopefully, I'll get a faster time
0:30:54 > 0:30:56- than him, and that will count for something.- Yeah.
0:30:56 > 0:30:59- There you go.- All the ticket sales are based on how we do here today.
0:30:59 > 0:31:00So, that'll be great.
0:31:00 > 0:31:02All right, let's talk about your driving history.
0:31:02 > 0:31:04You're both kind of, late starters, right?
0:31:04 > 0:31:07- Mm.- Yeah, I came to driving quite late.
0:31:07 > 0:31:11I started lying, and telling people I'd lost my license
0:31:11 > 0:31:14because there was less shame in that than not having got it yet.
0:31:14 > 0:31:18Can you clarify how it works having a provisional licence in Ireland?
0:31:18 > 0:31:22Because the research notes slightly confused me.
0:31:22 > 0:31:25I mean, are you thrown by the fact it seems to be that if you have
0:31:25 > 0:31:28a provisional licence, you're allowed to totally drive for free, in Ireland?
0:31:28 > 0:31:32- Yes.- That may no longer be the case, I can't guarantee,
0:31:32 > 0:31:35but that certainly was the case, because I had it for three,
0:31:35 > 0:31:38four years, just on it with a P, or an L...
0:31:38 > 0:31:41So, what was the benefit in having a full driving licence as opposed to
0:31:41 > 0:31:43- a provisional licence? - Bragging rights.
0:31:43 > 0:31:46- Yeah.- That's all. - You put it like that, actually...
0:31:46 > 0:31:48I mean, I'm surprised they didn't just phase out the full licence!
0:31:48 > 0:31:51And just make it all provisional.
0:31:51 > 0:31:53Yeah, it was quite loose.
0:31:53 > 0:31:56- So, first cars?- The first car I bought was a Seat Ibiza.
0:31:56 > 0:31:59And I couldn't drive it, my girlfriend drove it.
0:31:59 > 0:32:01- That was, that was the deal. - The first car for me
0:32:01 > 0:32:04was a Ford Fiesta, like, a 1991 Ford Fiesta
0:32:04 > 0:32:06that I managed to crash twice in the same crash.
0:32:08 > 0:32:10- You have to explain that.- Yeah. - There was a crash,
0:32:10 > 0:32:13it was my ineptitude. I'd only been driving a couple of months,
0:32:13 > 0:32:15and I popped out from behind a stop sign,
0:32:15 > 0:32:17would be the discreet way of putting it,
0:32:17 > 0:32:21and much to the excitement of the car who was on the road at the time,
0:32:21 > 0:32:24so he nudged me into a wall, and then my dad came round,
0:32:24 > 0:32:27and went, "OK, fine, we'll take this car off somewhere to be repaired."
0:32:27 > 0:32:30I said, "Great," and we pulled out, and I sat in the car,
0:32:30 > 0:32:32and he attached a tow rope to this car.
0:32:32 > 0:32:35This already crashed car, and he was ready to tow it, and I said,
0:32:35 > 0:32:39"Brilliant," thumbs up, like, whatever, and he pulled off, and I pulled off,
0:32:39 > 0:32:41and I'm pulling the wheel, but nobody told me you have to put
0:32:41 > 0:32:43the car into neutral when you're being towed.
0:32:43 > 0:32:46So, I, on the first move, it locked,
0:32:46 > 0:32:50and then my dad pulled the car out of this position, across the road,
0:32:50 > 0:32:51into another wall.
0:32:51 > 0:32:56So I hit two sides, two walls on the side of the same road, twice,
0:32:56 > 0:32:59with the same car, and just, it was just gone. It was written off
0:32:59 > 0:33:01- at that stage.- Have you ever seen a Laurel and Hardy film?
0:33:01 > 0:33:05- Yes.- Essentially that.- That's all you have to say.- Ed, your first car,
0:33:05 > 0:33:07having passed your driving test, is extraordinary.
0:33:07 > 0:33:09I think the audience will agree with this.
0:33:09 > 0:33:12The first car after passing my test, the first car I got for myself,
0:33:12 > 0:33:14was a Mercedes SL 350.
0:33:14 > 0:33:16Yeah, not too shabby.
0:33:16 > 0:33:18That was called Nora, I called that car.
0:33:18 > 0:33:21Cos Nora Batty, and it was a tiny bit like the Batmobile.
0:33:21 > 0:33:24I name all my cars, and they all have silly names.
0:33:24 > 0:33:26What came after that one?
0:33:26 > 0:33:29A Volkswagen Golf called James Golfandini.
0:33:32 > 0:33:35And I think there was another Golf called Revvy Ballesteros.
0:33:36 > 0:33:40And I got rid of that, and I now have a Jeep Renegade which is
0:33:40 > 0:33:43called Lorenzo, after Lorenzo Lamas, who played the title role
0:33:43 > 0:33:46in the obscure, yet seminal, '90s TV show, Renegade.
0:33:46 > 0:33:50I'm good at naming cars. That's my Renegade, there.
0:33:50 > 0:33:52And that's the canoe on top that's called Stinky Pete,
0:33:52 > 0:33:55cos it's an old prospector.
0:33:55 > 0:33:56I can't help myself.
0:33:56 > 0:33:58- You named your canoe?- Yeah.
0:33:58 > 0:34:00I name everything.
0:34:00 > 0:34:02Can you imagine anything about him he hasn't named?
0:34:06 > 0:34:09Now, Dara, your car history is a bit more exotic, right?
0:34:09 > 0:34:11Well, I learned to drive with an Audi TT. I thought
0:34:11 > 0:34:14when I started again, I might as well start with an Audi TT.
0:34:14 > 0:34:17- That's punchy, as well.- Yeah, it's a zippy little thing, yeah.
0:34:17 > 0:34:20- I got my test with that. - You fit in an Audi TT?
0:34:20 > 0:34:23- Not very well.- I can't fit in one of those!- There's an element to which,
0:34:23 > 0:34:25if you put to the roof down, I look like Noddy.
0:34:27 > 0:34:29But I was very happy in the Audi TT.
0:34:29 > 0:34:32It was very pleasant. Now I have a Maserati Grancabrio,
0:34:32 > 0:34:36which is the soft top, with the four seats, which is...
0:34:36 > 0:34:39Yeah, you're going, "Ooh!"
0:34:39 > 0:34:41That's actually your driveway, isn't it?
0:34:41 > 0:34:42It is, actually. Well, we opened it out.
0:34:42 > 0:34:45I mean, most of the time, West London doesn't look like that.
0:34:45 > 0:34:47Who cleans your pool, by the way?
0:34:48 > 0:34:51He's constantly at it. Takes ages, to be honest.
0:34:51 > 0:34:54It's a... It's a very pretty car. It's a very lovely car.
0:34:54 > 0:34:57- And they're quiet?- There's a nice noise off it, you know.
0:34:57 > 0:35:01- What? Does it have a sufficient noise to it?- It's obnoxiously loud!
0:35:01 > 0:35:04Yeah, there is a point where they sold, I think, four
0:35:04 > 0:35:07on my road and surrounding area, they had a big push on them.
0:35:07 > 0:35:11There was some sort of deal, and at eight in the morning it's...
0:35:11 > 0:35:13HE IMITATES ENGINES ROARING
0:35:13 > 0:35:15All the people leaving at different times.
0:35:15 > 0:35:18- They are very loud. - It's got a lovely noise on it.
0:35:18 > 0:35:20What's it like for carrying a 16-foot canoe on the roof?
0:35:20 > 0:35:22Not so good. And, interestingly,
0:35:22 > 0:35:26a Venn diagram of people who drive Maserati Grancabrios and people who
0:35:26 > 0:35:28- give a- BLEEP- about canoeing is...
0:35:29 > 0:35:31There's surprisingly small overlap.
0:35:33 > 0:35:35No, it's not really for people...
0:35:35 > 0:35:38It's great for stepping out of a private beach club in Monte Carlo,
0:35:38 > 0:35:40but not so much for the canoeing.
0:35:40 > 0:35:43All right, what do you think? Take a look at your laps?
0:35:43 > 0:35:47- Yeah, go on.- How did it go, come on, let's have... What about conditions?
0:35:47 > 0:35:51It was wet. First of all, can we just say that, it was very wet.
0:35:51 > 0:35:52I'm surprised you've any footage
0:35:52 > 0:35:55because the lenses must have been just pounded with water.
0:35:55 > 0:35:58It was incredibly wet. I don't think there's been a day like this.
0:35:58 > 0:36:00I saw you in the production office, you were walking around, I said,
0:36:00 > 0:36:04"How did it go?" You said, "It was good, but it's drier out there for Dara now."
0:36:04 > 0:36:07Yes, I went first. I went first. It's always, always,
0:36:07 > 0:36:09everything just comes up roses for this dick.
0:36:11 > 0:36:14It's always, like, I'm there, I've got the windscreen wipers on
0:36:14 > 0:36:16and everything, going through this monsoon weather, and as soon as
0:36:16 > 0:36:18I get out of the car, rainbows, sunshine...
0:36:18 > 0:36:20SINGS ANGELICALLY
0:36:20 > 0:36:22There you go, Dara, away for an hour, steam coming off the track,
0:36:22 > 0:36:25on you go, dry as a bone. I hate you!
0:36:26 > 0:36:28I want a W next to my name.
0:36:29 > 0:36:32And just a D, for damp, next to his.
0:36:32 > 0:36:35OK, well, maybe, first, we'll take a look at Dara's lap.
0:36:35 > 0:36:37And, while we're watching that,
0:36:37 > 0:36:39- we can get a little marriage counselling for you.- Yes!
0:36:39 > 0:36:42All right, let's take a look at Dara's lap.
0:36:42 > 0:36:45So, this is Dara, the track's looking pretty dry.
0:36:45 > 0:36:46Little bit of a stumbled start.
0:36:46 > 0:36:49Operation crush Ed's dreams.
0:36:49 > 0:36:51So, not remotely competitive!
0:36:51 > 0:36:54Now, your line through here was always pretty good.
0:36:56 > 0:36:59That was just... So many G forces!
0:36:59 > 0:37:01It doesn't look fast.
0:37:01 > 0:37:03OK, don't hit the tyres, don't hit the tyres.
0:37:03 > 0:37:07- Don't hit the tyres. - You didn't hit the tyres.
0:37:07 > 0:37:09The exit of Chicago, smooth again.
0:37:09 > 0:37:11- Oh, no, no, oh, no.- BLEEP- you!
0:37:11 > 0:37:15The violent slap between the seats indicates something else.
0:37:15 > 0:37:17Now, driving the car really fast.
0:37:18 > 0:37:21God, Ed will be so disappointed when he loses this.
0:37:21 > 0:37:22He seems confident, doesn't he?
0:37:22 > 0:37:25Here, around the invisible Hammerhead.
0:37:25 > 0:37:27Why? What's supposed to be here?
0:37:27 > 0:37:30Put some trestle tables with custard pies on it, or something.
0:37:30 > 0:37:32You've got...you've got the left-right bit
0:37:32 > 0:37:36- for the first time in the day, I think, there.- Bollards, anything.
0:37:36 > 0:37:37Inflatable things.
0:37:39 > 0:37:41Go into...fourth gear!
0:37:41 > 0:37:43There's even a fifth and sixth, we'll never use it,
0:37:43 > 0:37:45it's hard to get out of third.
0:37:45 > 0:37:47Stop that! Got this corner.
0:37:47 > 0:37:50Follow Through, Follow Through.
0:37:50 > 0:37:53That was good speed. Now the tyre wall.
0:37:53 > 0:37:56And this one, that you keep saying don't brake on.
0:37:56 > 0:37:58Has Ed broke on it? Well, then, I'm not going to brake on it.
0:37:58 > 0:38:01Good speed. Oh, that was a brake light.
0:38:01 > 0:38:04Coming in to second to last.
0:38:04 > 0:38:06Tricky seeing this one. Now onto the slippery bit.
0:38:08 > 0:38:09Oh, whoa, whoa.
0:38:09 > 0:38:12Through there, safely. And now through Gambon.
0:38:12 > 0:38:13Completely slowed down.
0:38:14 > 0:38:17- And over the line.- OK.
0:38:20 > 0:38:22Yeah, I think there's very little in it.
0:38:22 > 0:38:25- Yeah?- I think that looked pretty racy, actually?
0:38:25 > 0:38:27I think it looked smooth.
0:38:27 > 0:38:29Honestly, the first turn, I thought I'd lost it.
0:38:29 > 0:38:31I honestly thought, "Oh, you've screwed that up now."
0:38:31 > 0:38:34I thought I'd gone way too wide and lost control of it there,
0:38:34 > 0:38:37because of the conditions. You can see, from the driving rain.
0:38:37 > 0:38:40And the sleet. Which cameras can't pick up on.
0:38:40 > 0:38:42It looked like you carried pretty good corner speed,
0:38:42 > 0:38:45I didn't see a lot of wheel spin. Right, let's see Ed's lap.
0:38:45 > 0:38:48OK. Well, that's wetter, definitely wetter.
0:38:48 > 0:38:50Cleaner start. Using more revs.
0:38:50 > 0:38:53Yes, you might sell more tickets than I do,
0:38:53 > 0:38:54when you're on tour...
0:38:56 > 0:38:59..but who, who will be faster round the Top Gear track?
0:39:01 > 0:39:04Slightly wider on the way in, is he tighter through the corner?
0:39:04 > 0:39:06He is. And more speed on the exit, too.
0:39:06 > 0:39:08Perfect, nailed that.
0:39:08 > 0:39:11That's for the time you opened for me, and were funnier.
0:39:14 > 0:39:16You really warmed to this!
0:39:16 > 0:39:19That's for having a bigger house than I have.
0:39:24 > 0:39:26Stick that up Brian Cox's bum!
0:39:30 > 0:39:33Exit of Hammerhead, I don't know what to say after that!
0:39:33 > 0:39:35OK, got a bit cocky there, almost lost it.
0:39:35 > 0:39:38Down the back straight, through the Follow Through.
0:39:38 > 0:39:40This is for getting me to be your best man, and then doing a speech,
0:39:40 > 0:39:45just before mine, and being even funnier than my best man speech was!
0:39:47 > 0:39:49No brake lights, all right.
0:39:51 > 0:39:52There you go. Nailed it.
0:39:52 > 0:39:55Nailed it. OK, brake, and change down.
0:39:56 > 0:39:59Unstable on the entry, and now the super slippery bit.
0:39:59 > 0:40:02Man, I can't wait for the next episode of Mock The Week,
0:40:02 > 0:40:04you ain't never going to live this down. I have destroyed you.
0:40:04 > 0:40:08And now Gambon, oh, a big slide, showboating.
0:40:08 > 0:40:10Over the line, that looked quick.
0:40:14 > 0:40:20Hey, not only...not only was that a lot of very good driving,
0:40:20 > 0:40:22I also thought you got a lot out of your system.
0:40:22 > 0:40:24- That was very cathartic. - Very therapeutic.
0:40:24 > 0:40:28- Yeah.- I can't believe how much I care about numbers that are written
0:40:28 > 0:40:31right there. It makes no difference to anything, and I care deeply.
0:40:31 > 0:40:33I'm looking at this, right here,
0:40:33 > 0:40:36and I used to share a flat with Ross Noble,
0:40:36 > 0:40:37I know I'm nowhere near there.
0:40:37 > 0:40:40But I'm looking at Lee Mack, and I'm thinking...
0:40:40 > 0:40:42Yeah, he's a realistic target.
0:40:42 > 0:40:45What I'm thinking is we could pretty much forget the lap board,
0:40:45 > 0:40:47this is about head-to-head.
0:40:47 > 0:40:49- I mean, it's clear, is it not? - It's a grudge match.
0:40:49 > 0:40:54Yeah, OK. So, you've got the same car, same conditions.
0:40:54 > 0:40:57Roughly the same conditions. Roughly the same conditions.
0:41:00 > 0:41:02Not being petty, just...
0:41:02 > 0:41:04You don't even know the times yet!
0:41:04 > 0:41:06No, I don't, but I'm already making excuses.
0:41:08 > 0:41:11- All right. Are you ready? - Yeah.- Yeah.
0:41:11 > 0:41:16Dara. You did it in one minute...
0:41:16 > 0:41:19..53.2.
0:41:19 > 0:41:20OK.
0:41:25 > 0:41:27- You beat Lee Mack. - Beat Lee Mack.
0:41:27 > 0:41:30I'm disappointed I didn't beat John Culshaw, but I beat Lee Mack.
0:41:30 > 0:41:32- That's a good thing. - But, remember, we're wet.
0:41:32 > 0:41:33Wet, yeah.
0:41:33 > 0:41:36- One minute, 53.2.- OK.- And Ed?
0:41:36 > 0:41:38You did it...
0:41:38 > 0:41:40..in two... No, I'm kidding.
0:41:43 > 0:41:44OK, you did it in one minute...
0:41:46 > 0:41:49..50...
0:41:49 > 0:41:50..point zero.
0:41:54 > 0:41:57Do you see what you get? Do you see what you get?!
0:42:06 > 0:42:08Ladies and gentlemen, Ed Byrne, and Dara O Briain!
0:42:08 > 0:42:11- Well done, mate. Hope you enjoyed it.- Great job. Great job.
0:42:18 > 0:42:19That was funny, funny guys.
0:42:24 > 0:42:25Now, big question.
0:42:25 > 0:42:28What's the most game-changing car of them all?
0:42:29 > 0:42:32Well, there's the Mercedes S class.
0:42:32 > 0:42:34Introduced ABS, airbags,
0:42:34 > 0:42:37like, a million tech firsts,
0:42:37 > 0:42:40or the Tesla Model S, electric pioneer.
0:42:41 > 0:42:44Not even close, OK?
0:42:44 > 0:42:48Because there's one out there that's even cleverer than the S class,
0:42:48 > 0:42:52or the Tesla. A car that defines cutting edge.
0:42:52 > 0:42:54Who are you talking to?
0:43:06 > 0:43:08It's a quintessential slice of France
0:43:08 > 0:43:13that has amazed, delighted, and charmed the world over for 70 years.
0:43:15 > 0:43:17And, in my humble opinion,
0:43:17 > 0:43:20it is one of the most perfect cars that has ever existed.
0:43:22 > 0:43:25Yes, it's the Citroen 2CV.
0:43:25 > 0:43:27It may not be conventionally beautiful,
0:43:27 > 0:43:30or even unconventionally beautiful, but this...
0:43:30 > 0:43:33..this might be the most ground-breaking car of the lot.
0:43:38 > 0:43:40And this...this is just joyous.
0:43:40 > 0:43:44Driving a 2CV on a minor, rural, French road
0:43:44 > 0:43:47is the same as driving a Ferrari at Fiorano.
0:43:47 > 0:43:48I'm in its element.
0:43:48 > 0:43:50I'm in context.
0:43:50 > 0:43:51I love it.
0:43:53 > 0:43:56You want to know how much I love the 2CV?
0:43:57 > 0:43:58I love it so much I bought one.
0:43:59 > 0:44:01This one.
0:44:01 > 0:44:03This is my 2CV.
0:44:08 > 0:44:14Citroen launched the 2CV in 1948, a hardy car for both road and field,
0:44:14 > 0:44:17developed for over a decade to bring rural France
0:44:17 > 0:44:20a better alternative to the horse and cart.
0:44:21 > 0:44:23And, boy, did they succeed!
0:44:25 > 0:44:28With its simple but robust air-cooled engine,
0:44:28 > 0:44:31its pioneering all-terrain ride,
0:44:31 > 0:44:35and its uncanny ability to carry way more stuff than you'd expect,
0:44:35 > 0:44:39the 2CV was an unprecedented feat of less-is-more engineering.
0:44:40 > 0:44:43In fact, so timeless was the 2CV,
0:44:43 > 0:44:46they kept building it for over 40 years.
0:44:48 > 0:44:50They say that necessity is the mother of invention,
0:44:50 > 0:44:53and the wonderful 2CV is proof.
0:44:53 > 0:44:56There's more ingenuity in this single door panel
0:44:56 > 0:45:00than there is in most car companies' entire history.
0:45:00 > 0:45:03This isn't just a car, it's a revolutionary.
0:45:03 > 0:45:06It's one of the most significant engineering feats
0:45:06 > 0:45:08of the...20th century.
0:45:08 > 0:45:11- Where did you come from? - Not important. What is important
0:45:11 > 0:45:15is that you just called this one of the most significant engineering
0:45:15 > 0:45:19- feats of the 20th century. Come on. - It's perfect.- Are you crazy?
0:45:19 > 0:45:21Look, it looks like it's made out of car parts that...
0:45:22 > 0:45:24..none of the other cars wanted.
0:45:24 > 0:45:28It's a triumph of...functional design.
0:45:28 > 0:45:29Look at it, it's perfect.
0:45:32 > 0:45:35- What?- Look, open your mind. Don't be facetious.
0:45:35 > 0:45:38- OK? Can I take you for a drive in it? Go on.- No way!
0:45:38 > 0:45:40No.
0:45:50 > 0:45:52So, let me get this straight.
0:45:52 > 0:45:57This is your car, that you bought, with your money.
0:45:57 > 0:45:59- Yes, I did.- Why?
0:45:59 > 0:46:01What do you mean, why?
0:46:01 > 0:46:05- Aren't you feeling it?- Feeling what? Claustrophobic? Yeah.
0:46:08 > 0:46:09What does it have for a motor?
0:46:09 > 0:46:13I mean, I assume it has a motor, we're moving, but what is it?
0:46:13 > 0:46:17A 425cc air-cooled flat twin.
0:46:17 > 0:46:19Oh, two cylinders, wow, they went big!
0:46:23 > 0:46:25What does it make for horsepower?
0:46:25 > 0:46:28- 12.- 12!
0:46:30 > 0:46:32You're an idiot.
0:46:39 > 0:46:43Let me tell you about the 2CV's original design brief.
0:46:44 > 0:46:46Citron decreed that it had to be able to carry
0:46:46 > 0:46:52its occupants wearing their church hats and it had to be driven over
0:46:52 > 0:46:56a bumpy field without breaking a basket of eggs onboard.
0:46:56 > 0:46:59- No way.- Yes, way.
0:47:00 > 0:47:02Stop the car.
0:47:04 > 0:47:06- Where are you going?- Shopping.
0:47:18 > 0:47:19OK.
0:47:20 > 0:47:23Now. Hat for me, hat for you.
0:47:25 > 0:47:27You're such a child, I'm not wearing that.
0:47:27 > 0:47:30Be a good church wife, and put the damn hat on!
0:47:32 > 0:47:36I'm pretty sure that 1940s French farmers didn't wear stovepipe hats.
0:47:36 > 0:47:38Well, this farmer did.
0:47:41 > 0:47:44- That's heavy.- That's a very big basket of eggs.
0:47:44 > 0:47:46You're very pretty.
0:47:48 > 0:47:51- Shut up!- Now, be careful.
0:47:54 > 0:47:58So, Abraham Lincoln wanted to put the design brief to the test.
0:47:58 > 0:48:01Fine. Frankly, the eggs are safer in the 2CV
0:48:01 > 0:48:02than they are in the hen.
0:48:04 > 0:48:07We're safe here, this car is going to pass with flying colours.
0:48:08 > 0:48:09OK.
0:48:11 > 0:48:13OK. OK!
0:48:14 > 0:48:18None of those are moving. This car is genius!
0:48:20 > 0:48:22Oh, there they go.
0:48:25 > 0:48:26There they go!
0:48:30 > 0:48:31Oh, no!
0:48:38 > 0:48:41No, you utter bastard!
0:48:43 > 0:48:46- That was a tip.- No, I didn't... - That was a tip!- I didn't tip it.
0:48:51 > 0:48:52That's horrible!
0:48:56 > 0:48:57All right, all right. All right!
0:49:01 > 0:49:03No!
0:49:07 > 0:49:11Oh, they smell so bad.
0:49:11 > 0:49:13They smell terrible.
0:49:15 > 0:49:16Oh.
0:49:18 > 0:49:20OK, well, there you go.
0:49:23 > 0:49:27So, as my own eggs will testify,
0:49:27 > 0:49:31I would say that your car has failed to meet one of its design briefs.
0:49:33 > 0:49:38One very thorough jet wash later, Chris decided it was time for lunch.
0:49:38 > 0:49:40You want to sit down somewhere, right? Check this out.
0:49:40 > 0:49:42Ugh! It still smells of eggs.
0:49:42 > 0:49:46- Whoa, what are you doing? - This is our seating area.
0:49:46 > 0:49:48This is the beauty of the 2CV.
0:49:48 > 0:49:52Right, I'm going to find somewhere cosy and romantic for us, come on.
0:49:57 > 0:49:59Put your hamper down.
0:49:59 > 0:50:02Come and join me. Take a throne.
0:50:04 > 0:50:06You look like a homeless person.
0:50:07 > 0:50:09Is this a date?
0:50:09 > 0:50:12- I suppose it could be. - Let's pretend it's not.
0:50:12 > 0:50:13OK.
0:50:13 > 0:50:15Try that.
0:50:15 > 0:50:18- What is this?- That's gentleman's relish.- What?
0:50:18 > 0:50:20And that was the end of lunch.
0:50:28 > 0:50:30You genuinely do like this car, don't you?
0:50:30 > 0:50:32I love this car.
0:50:32 > 0:50:33This is the essence of motoring.
0:50:33 > 0:50:36- This is...- Wow, that's... - ..essential motoring.
0:50:36 > 0:50:39There's an essence in here, but I don't know that it's motoring.
0:50:41 > 0:50:43You'll like this.
0:50:43 > 0:50:47The original design brief for the 2CV also specified that it should be
0:50:47 > 0:50:50able to carry two adult farmers,
0:50:50 > 0:50:55and 50kg of farm produce at 37mph.
0:50:55 > 0:50:58- Stop the car. Stop the car.- Please!
0:51:08 > 0:51:10Come on.
0:51:10 > 0:51:13OK, here you go, 50 kilos of farm produce.
0:51:13 > 0:51:15Meet Nicole and Papa.
0:51:16 > 0:51:18Could have gone with potatoes.
0:51:18 > 0:51:20Yeah, but potatoes won't crap all over your car.
0:51:20 > 0:51:25After all, the egg test had gone so well, this should be a breeze.
0:51:25 > 0:51:28- Ow!- OK.
0:51:28 > 0:51:29Let's go.
0:51:29 > 0:51:32Hey, hey, you over here, I'm driving, my turn.
0:51:32 > 0:51:35Oh, come on! This is my car.
0:51:35 > 0:51:38- I paid for it with my money. - I know! Still cracks me up!
0:51:38 > 0:51:40HE LAUGHS
0:51:44 > 0:51:45GEARS CLUNK
0:51:45 > 0:51:47Ow!
0:51:52 > 0:51:55So, 37mph with 50 kilos of sheep in the back.
0:51:57 > 0:52:00Time to see what the 2CV was made of.
0:52:00 > 0:52:01Right, here we go, downhill, tuck.
0:52:05 > 0:52:07- 34.- Come on, deux chevaux.- Come on!
0:52:10 > 0:52:11- 36.- Come on, come on!
0:52:15 > 0:52:1636.
0:52:18 > 0:52:2137. 37mph. There it is.
0:52:21 > 0:52:25It worked. It works, it meets its brief.
0:52:28 > 0:52:31And, if driving sheep around at medium speed
0:52:31 > 0:52:33wasn't enough to seduce him,
0:52:33 > 0:52:36as we bid au revoir to Nicole and Papa,
0:52:36 > 0:52:38I had one more trick up my sleeve to convince Matt
0:52:38 > 0:52:41that this really is the greatest car of all time.
0:52:44 > 0:52:45Take a left here. There, down there.
0:52:45 > 0:52:48- What are you doing? - We're going racing.
0:52:48 > 0:52:49Racing?
0:52:50 > 0:52:52Against what? Pedestrians?
0:52:55 > 0:53:00No, we'd be racing in what is quite possibly the finest form of
0:53:00 > 0:53:05motorsport, the 2CV One-Make Championship.
0:53:07 > 0:53:10So, here we are, the world of 2CV racing.
0:53:10 > 0:53:12Don't they look fantastic?
0:53:12 > 0:53:14- I think they're cool. - Look how low the rear is.
0:53:14 > 0:53:17Yeah, those are way lower than yours.
0:53:17 > 0:53:20Here we go, then. This is our racing car.
0:53:21 > 0:53:23This? Oh, we're not using your car?
0:53:23 > 0:53:25No, cos my car is mine.
0:53:25 > 0:53:28Anyhow, jump in, you're driving.
0:53:28 > 0:53:31- Really?- Oh, yeah.- Yeah! OK.
0:53:33 > 0:53:36With upgraded 602cc engines,
0:53:36 > 0:53:39producing no less than 50 brake horsepower,
0:53:39 > 0:53:44these race-modified monsters can reach speeds of up to 85mph.
0:53:44 > 0:53:48Yes, 2CV racing is serious business.
0:53:49 > 0:53:51I noticed that you have a neck brace.
0:53:51 > 0:53:54I don't have a neck brace. Do I need a neck brace?
0:53:55 > 0:53:57No, you don't need a neck brace.
0:53:57 > 0:53:59Why do you have a neck brace, and I don't have one?
0:53:59 > 0:54:01Don't get caught up in the details, you look great.
0:54:07 > 0:54:09We'd be up against some of the finest,
0:54:09 > 0:54:12fiercest drivers the 2CV world had to offer.
0:54:12 > 0:54:15And, as we took our position on the grid,
0:54:15 > 0:54:18we were completely focused on the challenge ahead.
0:54:19 > 0:54:20How's the water temperature?
0:54:21 > 0:54:24Er...
0:54:24 > 0:54:26I don't think we have a water temperature gauge.
0:54:26 > 0:54:30- Maybe there's no water in... There's no water in this, you- BLEEP!
0:54:31 > 0:54:33It took me a minute!
0:54:39 > 0:54:40Go!
0:54:43 > 0:54:45What a start! What a start.
0:54:45 > 0:54:48Go over to the right, get over to the right.
0:54:48 > 0:54:51Squeeze him. First into the first corner.
0:54:53 > 0:54:55There's one coming, there's one coming.
0:54:55 > 0:54:57He's right there.
0:54:58 > 0:55:00Brake late, brake late, brake late!
0:55:02 > 0:55:04Get in there!
0:55:06 > 0:55:09- Where did he come from? - He's right there.
0:55:10 > 0:55:12That's the famous Steve Walford...
0:55:14 > 0:55:16..engineering 2CV.
0:55:16 > 0:55:19He was the one in the paddock that was saying that Ross was funnier.
0:55:19 > 0:55:21I think he's got it in for you.
0:55:21 > 0:55:23But Steve was going down.
0:55:27 > 0:55:28Oh, mate, you showed him there.
0:55:30 > 0:55:31This is demon stuff, Matthew.
0:55:32 > 0:55:36However, as the only two-man team on the track,
0:55:36 > 0:55:39- our car had a weight problem. - Sorry, Chris.
0:55:39 > 0:55:41THUD
0:55:41 > 0:55:43- That didn't sound good.- No.
0:55:46 > 0:55:47Oh, come on!
0:55:47 > 0:55:49It's Rosie Racing.
0:55:49 > 0:55:52They're well known in 2CV circles as being brilliant.
0:55:54 > 0:55:57And it wasn't just Rosie who was out for blood.
0:55:57 > 0:55:59- Oh, no, come on.- Got another one up the inside.
0:56:00 > 0:56:02It's the famous Steve Walford again.
0:56:02 > 0:56:05What's this one doing... Oh, my lord!
0:56:06 > 0:56:10As the laps piled on, we slipped further and further back.
0:56:11 > 0:56:14Third, second, third, fourth - we're sixth, come on!
0:56:14 > 0:56:16- I know, I know, it's the weight. - What do you mean, it's the weight?
0:56:16 > 0:56:19It's not my fault! Matt kept pushing harder...
0:56:21 > 0:56:22Brake, brake.
0:56:22 > 0:56:25..but our chances didn't look good.
0:56:26 > 0:56:28We cannot come last!
0:56:28 > 0:56:30I'm doing my best!
0:56:34 > 0:56:37But, then, Chris stopped whining and started helping...
0:56:38 > 0:56:40Up the inside of Rosie Racing.
0:56:40 > 0:56:41..and we started to fight back.
0:56:42 > 0:56:43I got him!
0:56:45 > 0:56:47One corner...
0:56:47 > 0:56:49Use all the circuit, all the circuit.
0:56:49 > 0:56:51..and one 2CV at a time.
0:56:55 > 0:56:56OK, we're P4. P4.
0:56:58 > 0:56:59Heading into the final lap,
0:56:59 > 0:57:01we set our sights on a podium finish.
0:57:03 > 0:57:07Standing in our way, the formidable Jelly Snake Racing.
0:57:07 > 0:57:09What's a jelly snake?
0:57:12 > 0:57:14Come on, come on, come on!
0:57:14 > 0:57:16Don't give it up. Don't give it up!
0:57:16 > 0:57:18Down the middle, down the middle, my son.
0:57:18 > 0:57:20Down the middle!
0:57:22 > 0:57:23We're third!
0:57:27 > 0:57:29Final corner, dude. P3.
0:57:30 > 0:57:33- Come on, come on.- We've got a podium! We've got a podium!
0:57:40 > 0:57:43- That's not bad. - That's more than not bad!
0:57:43 > 0:57:45Way to go, girl! That was fantastic.
0:57:45 > 0:57:48That was really fun. I love this car.
0:57:52 > 0:57:55So, there you go. The 2CV.
0:57:55 > 0:57:57Everybody loves it in the end.
0:57:59 > 0:58:01In a Ferrari, people hate you.
0:58:01 > 0:58:05They love the Ferrari, but they hate you.
0:58:05 > 0:58:07In this, though, people love the car,
0:58:07 > 0:58:09and they love you for driving it.
0:58:11 > 0:58:14This is a car that makes people smile.
0:58:19 > 0:58:23- OK, I concede, you won me over. - Isn't it just brilliant?
0:58:23 > 0:58:26It really is. And I've got to say I want one.
0:58:26 > 0:58:28- How much is it?- About seven grand.
0:58:29 > 0:58:32Seven grand! Are you out of your mind? Forget it.
0:58:32 > 0:58:34Seven grand!
0:58:43 > 0:58:45CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:58:52 > 0:58:57So, both of you actually agree that this heap of junk...
0:58:58 > 0:59:00..is a work of genius?
0:59:00 > 0:59:01Whoa, whoa, easy there.
0:59:01 > 0:59:04This is Chris's heap of junk.
0:59:04 > 0:59:05So, this is actually your car?
0:59:05 > 0:59:08- Oh, yes.- Why?
0:59:08 > 0:59:11I get it. It's refreshingly simple.
0:59:11 > 0:59:13It breaks down, you fix it.
0:59:13 > 0:59:15Gets a dent, you bash the dent out.
0:59:15 > 0:59:18You have, like, a real connection with the car.
0:59:18 > 0:59:21I mean, I suppose so. I mean, it's got potential.
0:59:21 > 0:59:25I could straighten out the bodywork, wrap it, slam it.
0:59:25 > 0:59:26Throw on some dubs.
0:59:26 > 0:59:28- I could work with this.- Yeah, right?
0:59:28 > 0:59:31- Yeah.- Yeah.
0:59:31 > 0:59:34Just don't open the door, it smells awful in there.
0:59:34 > 0:59:37I think it's the eggs and the, what you call it, sheep dung.
0:59:38 > 0:59:40That's the joy of the 2CV, you see.
0:59:40 > 0:59:43I've given it a quick wash, air freshener inside,
0:59:43 > 0:59:45it's as good as new.
0:59:47 > 0:59:49This is what it looked like when it was new?
0:59:49 > 0:59:50LAUGHTER
0:59:50 > 0:59:52Ah, I still like it.
0:59:52 > 0:59:54All right, that's all we have time for.
0:59:54 > 0:59:56Join us next week when we try to speed up farming,
0:59:56 > 0:59:59and Sabine tries to speed up Rory.
0:59:59 > 1:00:00See you then. Goodnight.