0:00:02 > 0:00:07The world is full of insurmountable obstacles. Everest.
0:00:07 > 0:00:11The unchartered wilderness of Antarctica.
0:00:11 > 0:00:13The A40 at Oxford.
0:00:15 > 0:00:19But the daddy of them all is the Total Wipeout course,
0:00:19 > 0:00:22Buenos Aires, Argentina.
0:00:25 > 0:00:2920 ordinary British folk, including an army officer,
0:00:29 > 0:00:32a pet shop manager and a police dog handler
0:00:32 > 0:00:34will not only have to face,
0:00:34 > 0:00:37but also cross the ultimate obstacle course.
0:00:38 > 0:00:41One will be crowned champion.
0:00:41 > 0:00:4319 won't be crowed anything.
0:00:44 > 0:00:46Let the games begin!
0:00:48 > 0:00:52As usual, 20 contestants are out to win a £10,000 prize,
0:00:52 > 0:00:55and are also competing for the remaining three places
0:00:55 > 0:00:56in Total Wipeout - The Final.
0:00:56 > 0:01:00Let's see what the course has in store for the contestants today.
0:01:01 > 0:01:02The Qualifier...
0:01:02 > 0:01:04Warning - may contain big balls.
0:01:04 > 0:01:06The Sweeper...
0:01:06 > 0:01:08Warning - avoid damaging exposure.
0:01:08 > 0:01:11The Dreadmill...
0:01:11 > 0:01:13Warning - hard hat must be worn at all times.
0:01:13 > 0:01:16And finally, The Wipeout Zone...
0:01:16 > 0:01:19Warning - chances of winning can go down as well as up.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28Imagine, for a moment, that you are one of those contestants.
0:01:28 > 0:01:31Now, think about who you'd really
0:01:31 > 0:01:34like standing by the side of the course, offering you encouragement
0:01:34 > 0:01:37and sympathy. Keep going down the list.
0:01:37 > 0:01:39Keep going...
0:01:39 > 0:01:41Keep going, keep going...
0:01:41 > 0:01:43There she is! Amanda Byram -
0:01:43 > 0:01:46let's join her on the course with today's first contestant.
0:01:46 > 0:01:49We're joined now at the top of the course by a real-life Viking
0:01:49 > 0:01:51from the Shetland Islands.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53Hello, what's your name?
0:01:53 > 0:01:56I'm Magnus, I'm from Lerwick in Shetland.
0:01:56 > 0:02:00You must be totally hard and fearless, Magnus!
0:02:00 > 0:02:05You could say that, yeah. I... Being from Shetland,
0:02:05 > 0:02:09it's part of your blood to be tough. You know how to be tough,
0:02:09 > 0:02:10you can do anything.
0:02:10 > 0:02:15Oh, yeah! Well, if his ancestors really did conquer vast swathes of the globe,
0:02:15 > 0:02:18this course should be a doddle! Good luck.
0:02:18 > 0:02:20I'm the king!
0:02:20 > 0:02:22The Viking! Woo!
0:02:23 > 0:02:26The Viking invasion begins, with a ridiculous run,
0:02:26 > 0:02:28and a slither down the slope, and oh!
0:02:28 > 0:02:30A blow to the chest.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33The 36-year-old systems administrator
0:02:33 > 0:02:35is back on his way though, oh, yeah.
0:02:35 > 0:02:39Not only are Vikings making a comeback today -
0:02:39 > 0:02:41so are the topple towers - there they are!
0:02:41 > 0:02:44And he's...no! He's not cleared them at all.
0:02:44 > 0:02:48- Oh, disgusting!- Not very Viking, is it? It's only a bit of mud.
0:02:48 > 0:02:51Please! Magnus has started, so he'll finish...
0:02:51 > 0:02:53Ha! Oh, OK.
0:02:53 > 0:02:54Even if he is a bit muddy.
0:02:54 > 0:02:56On to the Sucker Punch now.
0:02:56 > 0:03:00Yeah. This would be easier, of course, if Magnus the Viking
0:03:00 > 0:03:02had got his axe through customs, but...no.
0:03:02 > 0:03:06- He's hard. He's fearless. He's the Viking.- Yes!
0:03:06 > 0:03:08He's doing well, actually.
0:03:08 > 0:03:11I fear for the wall if it punches him.
0:03:11 > 0:03:13Here we go...
0:03:13 > 0:03:16Past the mid-way point... and in the mud!
0:03:17 > 0:03:20Right, the big red balls.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23Will this be the ultimate Viking conquest?
0:03:24 > 0:03:27Come on, balls. Come on, balls.
0:03:27 > 0:03:28Here he goes...
0:03:28 > 0:03:32Yes... Ohh! No.
0:03:32 > 0:03:36Yeah. It's just, his heart's not in it.
0:03:36 > 0:03:40- Not like it would be in, say, torching a Saxon village.- So hard!
0:03:40 > 0:03:43Don't moan! That's not what Vikings do.
0:03:43 > 0:03:46Right. Just a swing into the Bubble Bath
0:03:46 > 0:03:48and if he makes it the clock will stop.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50Here he goes, here he goes.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52Ye... Oh!
0:03:52 > 0:03:53Never mind.
0:03:56 > 0:03:58Yeah, probably for the best really.
0:03:58 > 0:04:02Bubble baths don't really go with the whole Viking image, do they?
0:04:07 > 0:04:09So, despite missing his landing,
0:04:09 > 0:04:12Magnus, the Viking, has managed to sack and pillage his way
0:04:12 > 0:04:15around the course in two minutes 34.
0:04:15 > 0:04:16Not bad.
0:04:16 > 0:04:17That is so hard.
0:04:17 > 0:04:21I did a good job. I kept the Viking spirit up. Argh!
0:04:21 > 0:04:23I'm joined now at the top of the Qualifier by Eliza.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26So, Eliza, what have you been doing to prepare
0:04:26 > 0:04:28for the wrath of the Qualifier.
0:04:28 > 0:04:31Well, tactically, I think that for the Sucker Punch,
0:04:31 > 0:04:35I'm just going to hold on for dear life, man up and take it.
0:04:35 > 0:04:37What would you do if you won the money, Eliza?
0:04:37 > 0:04:39Eat macaroni cheese and trifle.
0:04:39 > 0:04:43What? And has anybody ever said "tactically" on here before?
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Is that allowed? Do we allow tactics?
0:04:46 > 0:04:50Oh! 27-year-old Eliza does work for an ad agency.
0:04:51 > 0:04:55I'll check none of her clients actually make macaroni or cheese,
0:04:55 > 0:04:57but that's what she's thinking of right now.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00On to the Topple Towers. Here we go. Yes. Yes. Ooh!
0:05:01 > 0:05:03That's impressive.
0:05:03 > 0:05:07Hang on, this is an amazing run!
0:05:07 > 0:05:09She's just focusing on the dream.
0:05:09 > 0:05:15Visualising ten grand's worth of macaroni cheese and custard.
0:05:15 > 0:05:17Right, the Sucker Punch.
0:05:17 > 0:05:21Can Eliza continue this impressive start. It has been good, here we go.
0:05:23 > 0:05:25She's on.
0:05:25 > 0:05:28OK, good start. She actually punched it back, that's nice. Oh!
0:05:31 > 0:05:33Oh! Whoa-oh! She's in!
0:05:33 > 0:05:36Oh, that was a proper, proper hit.
0:05:36 > 0:05:40Yeah, you've got to be thick-skinned to be in advertising,
0:05:40 > 0:05:41but not that thick.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43OK, the Big Balls.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46Maybe she can do some blue sky thinking, advertising style.
0:05:46 > 0:05:50Run it up the flag pole. Ooh! Oh, she's still on...
0:05:50 > 0:05:54the second ball. Half-way.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56Hang on...
0:05:56 > 0:05:59we've only just started and she's...
0:05:59 > 0:06:02she's on to the fourth ball! This is stag...
0:06:02 > 0:06:04She might just do this! She might just make it!
0:06:04 > 0:06:07Steady, Eliza. Steady, steady, steady.
0:06:08 > 0:06:10She has! Astonishing!
0:06:10 > 0:06:12And she's across.
0:06:17 > 0:06:21- All she has to do now is... - Ready, steady, go!
0:06:21 > 0:06:25..swing and land in the Bubble Bath to complete an incredible run.
0:06:27 > 0:06:30Yeah, ignore that. It was still INCREDIBLE!
0:06:30 > 0:06:34Advertiser Eliza completes the Qualifier in two minutes 38.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36But, more importantly, she crossed the balls.
0:06:36 > 0:06:38I reckon we can sprinkle some
0:06:38 > 0:06:40hundreds and thousands on that trifle.
0:06:40 > 0:06:44Well done, Eliza. She joins the elite club of Big Ball crossers.
0:06:44 > 0:06:48A club that has just six members, no bar and a very strict door policy.
0:06:48 > 0:06:53Time to induct advertiser Eliza into the Big Balls Wall of Fame.
0:06:56 > 0:06:59Still plenty more competitors to come. By the end of the Qualifier,
0:06:59 > 0:07:03who else, if anyone, will have made it on to the Big Balls Wall of Fame?
0:07:03 > 0:07:07I bet you're excited. Maybe the next competitor can do it.
0:07:09 > 0:07:14Here's Jon. A mature student from Aberdeenshire.
0:07:15 > 0:07:18I'm gonna cut this Total Wipeout course down to size!
0:07:18 > 0:07:21What was that? Oh, I see!
0:07:21 > 0:07:23Zorro. Gotcha.
0:07:23 > 0:07:26OK, Jonny Zorro is off.
0:07:26 > 0:07:28Oh!
0:07:28 > 0:07:30HE GRUNTS AND GROWLS
0:07:32 > 0:07:34What's that noise he's making?
0:07:34 > 0:07:35Yee-hah!
0:07:35 > 0:07:37What is that noise he's making?
0:07:38 > 0:07:42Jonny Zorro taking on the scourge of the Topple Towers,
0:07:42 > 0:07:46and it looks like the Topple Towers have defeated Jonny Zorro today.
0:07:46 > 0:07:48I'm sure he'll be back to carve a Z in them,
0:07:48 > 0:07:51after the security guards knock off tonight.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53Come on, Jonny.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56Right. To the Big Balls. Nobody can resist taunting them.
0:07:56 > 0:07:59Senor, what will your blood-curdling war cry be?
0:07:59 > 0:08:02- Cowabunga!- What? Cowabunga?
0:08:02 > 0:08:04No, that's... Oh!
0:08:06 > 0:08:07Yeah, schoolboy error.
0:08:07 > 0:08:10He's only gone and mixed up his Hispanic swordsman with
0:08:10 > 0:08:12his Ninja Turtles and, you know, paid the price.
0:08:15 > 0:08:18OK, Jonny Zorro must swing to safety.
0:08:18 > 0:08:19Landing it beautifully
0:08:19 > 0:08:22and finishing with a time of two minutes and nine seconds.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24Whoo!
0:08:24 > 0:08:27Who's next? It's 43-year-old Ruth from Leicester.
0:08:27 > 0:08:30She's mum to Crouching Tiger Hidden Adam,
0:08:30 > 0:08:34the Total Wipeout Champion. Remember him?
0:08:34 > 0:08:35How quickly we forget.
0:08:35 > 0:08:39Like any normal mum, Ruth enjoys reading novels, going out for dinner
0:08:39 > 0:08:41and pumping iron.
0:08:42 > 0:08:45OK, let's see if the gym work helps Rippling Ruth on the Big Balls.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47She can maybe lift them.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49No. Here we go... Oh!
0:08:49 > 0:08:52Well, she's been for the burn, time to cool off.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55Yeah, the knot isn't supposed to be an obstacle, Ruth.
0:08:55 > 0:08:57That's just... Yeah.
0:08:57 > 0:09:00Pumping iron clearly doesn't help with fiddly jobs...
0:09:02 > 0:09:04..or with swinging into Bubble Baths.
0:09:04 > 0:09:07She's got the physique, but not the technique.
0:09:07 > 0:09:09Rippling Ruth finishes in three minutes 51.
0:09:09 > 0:09:12Crouching Tiger Hidden Adam would be proud.
0:09:12 > 0:09:16Ruth, like so many other competitors today, struggled with
0:09:16 > 0:09:19one of the often underestimated obstacles.
0:09:19 > 0:09:21It's rubber...
0:09:21 > 0:09:23it's full of air...
0:09:23 > 0:09:26and it's not as easy as it looks.
0:09:26 > 0:09:29Yes, it's the least relaxing bubble bath on earth.
0:09:31 > 0:09:35And something of a bubble bath aficionado, well, and armchair one,
0:09:35 > 0:09:38I've devised an easy to follow rating system - the Hammond Scale.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41Where a rating of one is sadly inadequate,
0:09:41 > 0:09:43and ten is perfection.
0:09:43 > 0:09:45So, first it's Charlotte from Worthing.
0:09:45 > 0:09:48She's a fitness instructor. How will she rate on the Hammond Scale?
0:09:51 > 0:09:55Oh, oh! Yeah, good swing, early dismount, messy entry.
0:09:55 > 0:09:57That's a four out of ten,
0:09:57 > 0:10:02but Charlotte's Qualifier time is a respectable two minutes 44.
0:10:02 > 0:10:04Next, Carole from Manchester.
0:10:04 > 0:10:06How do you rate your chances here today?
0:10:06 > 0:10:08My chances are very high, nine out of ten I would say.
0:10:08 > 0:10:13Carole, the Hammond Scale can only be scaled by a Hammond and that's me,
0:10:13 > 0:10:16so get on with it. Swing. I'll do the scaling. Here we go.
0:10:16 > 0:10:19Ooh! She's made it. Excellent!
0:10:19 > 0:10:23Confident swing and an impressive 180 degree turn
0:10:23 > 0:10:26to entry, if you watch. Ten out of ten on the Hammond Scale, I'd say.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28But Cocky Carole is docked a point for insolence.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30Her time is two minutes and 34.
0:10:30 > 0:10:33From Fishguard, Pembrokeshire, meet 23-year-old Jodie,
0:10:33 > 0:10:37and equine shop manager, I think that means like a horse shop,
0:10:37 > 0:10:39she's a lover of all things horsey.
0:10:39 > 0:10:42Is there anything positive that you can tell me about your job
0:10:42 > 0:10:46and about horse-riding that you CAN use here on the Qualifier?
0:10:46 > 0:10:50Well, luckily, I quite enjoy my jumping, so I've got access to jumps,
0:10:50 > 0:10:53so forget about the horse, just jump in myself.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55- SHE GIGGLES - Best of luck out there today.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57Nice.
0:10:57 > 0:10:58OK. Now, I've got a theory -
0:10:58 > 0:11:01giggling Jodie clearly likes a laugh, cockney rhyming slang for
0:11:01 > 0:11:06laugh is bubble bath, so is it coincidence, or a sign?
0:11:06 > 0:11:09Yeah, it's coincidence, clearly. Yeah.
0:11:09 > 0:11:11That's a classic six out of ten on the Hammond Scale.
0:11:11 > 0:11:14Giggling Jodie won't be giggling about her time though -
0:11:14 > 0:11:16four minutes 14.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19Time for the first look at the leaderboard,
0:11:19 > 0:11:22and Jonny Zorro has carved up his opponents to find himself in
0:11:22 > 0:11:25top spot, ahead of Cocky Carole and Magnus the Viking.
0:11:25 > 0:11:29Ball crossing advertiser Eliza is ahead of four out of ten Charlotte
0:11:29 > 0:11:30and rippling Ruth.
0:11:30 > 0:11:34And giggling Jodie may need some cheering up down in seventh place.
0:11:34 > 0:11:36Seven competitors down, 13 to go.
0:11:36 > 0:11:39I'm joined now at the top of the Qualifier by the lovely Emma,
0:11:39 > 0:11:42who says that she likes the simple things in life,
0:11:42 > 0:11:46- like eating cake. Emma... - I've got some backstage
0:11:46 > 0:11:49and I'm gonna scoff some down, give me a quick sugar rush,
0:11:49 > 0:11:52- help me surge through.- OK.
0:11:52 > 0:11:54Flexible stuff from the muffin lover.
0:11:54 > 0:11:56BUZZER
0:11:56 > 0:11:59And Emma is off. Not stylish, but effective.
0:12:01 > 0:12:06That sugar rush has quickly become a sugar splash. Where's she gone?
0:12:06 > 0:12:08There we are!
0:12:08 > 0:12:12A bit of a delay under the pontoons, but she's in good spirits, look.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15So I am. I've just had an eclair by way of support for Emma.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17I'm on her side.
0:12:17 > 0:12:20OK. This is great! She's in a good mood!
0:12:20 > 0:12:23Too much sugar, though, this.
0:12:23 > 0:12:28Topple Towers now, or the Battenburg Blocks as Emma calls them, possibly.
0:12:30 > 0:12:34Oh! Count them when she gets out.
0:12:34 > 0:12:35Oh, mud bath.
0:12:35 > 0:12:38She's very polite about falling off the Topple Towers.
0:12:40 > 0:12:41On to the Sucker Punch now.
0:12:41 > 0:12:45Emma there, chocolate-coated. No, don't tell her that!
0:12:45 > 0:12:46She'll chew her leg off.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48Right, on to the wall.
0:12:48 > 0:12:50Oh! Off the wall!
0:12:50 > 0:12:53In the mud. That stuff is extra gloopy today.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58Yummy, yummy chocolate.
0:12:58 > 0:13:01No! Don't listen to Amanda, ever! That stuff was toxic long before
0:13:01 > 0:13:05it spent a week baking in the Argentinean sun.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07No, seriously, Emma. You want to get out of there, quick.
0:13:07 > 0:13:10No, you do. You can't have it. Come on.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13Come on! What's she looking for?
0:13:13 > 0:13:16As she approaches the Big Balls, 22-year-old Emma
0:13:16 > 0:13:18looks cream-crackered. She's not a fan of them.
0:13:18 > 0:13:21I wonder what's going through her mind right now?
0:13:21 > 0:13:24That's got to help. Yeah.
0:13:24 > 0:13:27Come on then, Emma. Here we go.
0:13:27 > 0:13:31Oh, yes, it's...
0:13:31 > 0:13:34it was brief, that was in its favour, I guess.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37From Emma's point of view, it was over quickly.
0:13:37 > 0:13:42Emma went on to finish the Qualifier in five minutes 35 seconds.
0:13:43 > 0:13:48This is Julian. He's a facilities manager from London.
0:13:48 > 0:13:51And his passion is Muay Tai boxing.
0:13:51 > 0:13:55This is Lisa. She's a marketing executive from County Tyrone.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59Her passion is tae kwon do.
0:13:59 > 0:14:03And this is Chris. He's a police dog handler from Swindon.
0:14:05 > 0:14:09His passion is Zen and the art of waving to his friends.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12Together they are...three contestants who might do well.
0:14:14 > 0:14:18The great journey of life has led them to this place.
0:14:20 > 0:14:24Today on Total Wipeout, their destinies collide.
0:14:24 > 0:14:29And Chris is here as well in those shorts and those shoes.
0:14:30 > 0:14:32He'll contribute something.
0:14:32 > 0:14:38Three mighty warriors, of varying mightiness, set off on their quest.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43Chris almost flies across the Topple Towers,
0:14:43 > 0:14:45but then crash lands right on his knee.
0:14:47 > 0:14:49Yeah, that will have hurt.
0:14:49 > 0:14:51Tae kwon do's Lisa is coming up fast.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53One set of towers completed. here we go.
0:14:55 > 0:14:58Oh, then it's a bit of trouble on the second set.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01Muay Thai Jules leaps like a gazelle.
0:15:01 > 0:15:04He's spent years discovering his inner self
0:15:04 > 0:15:06in the remote monasteries of China.
0:15:08 > 0:15:13Oh, now he's found his outer self in a big puddle of mud in Argentina.
0:15:13 > 0:15:15Reach deep inside, Julian.
0:15:15 > 0:15:19Not too deep, I think there's a shopping trolley down there.
0:15:19 > 0:15:23Can dog handler Chris take the Big Balls? No he can't, not really.
0:15:23 > 0:15:27Tae kwon do Lisa will do better. It is written that she shall.
0:15:29 > 0:15:33Yeah, it's written wrong, definitely.
0:15:33 > 0:15:37Muay Thai Jules seems very skilled in the art of stealth.
0:15:37 > 0:15:39Come on, Julian.
0:15:39 > 0:15:41Slowly does it.
0:15:41 > 0:15:46And the art of falling off foam blocks. That takes years to perfect.
0:15:46 > 0:15:48Oh, yeah.
0:15:50 > 0:15:53Those are Muay Thai moves he's actually doing there.
0:15:53 > 0:15:56Dog handler Chris looking forward to his bubble bath...
0:15:56 > 0:15:59and lands it! One minute 47. That is fast.
0:15:59 > 0:16:03A bedraggled tae kwon do Lisa now.
0:16:04 > 0:16:07In with a perfect finish, in two minutes 56.
0:16:07 > 0:16:09Muay Thai Jules, meanwhile, perhaps regretting
0:16:09 > 0:16:13skipping ball crossing classes back in that Tibetan monastery.
0:16:13 > 0:16:15Only instinct can save him now.
0:16:15 > 0:16:19If only he had one of those wires they fight on in the films.
0:16:19 > 0:16:22Oh, on to ball one with the lightness of a butterfly.
0:16:22 > 0:16:24Hello, actually, this is looking good.
0:16:24 > 0:16:28Julian taking his time...and mine,
0:16:28 > 0:16:31and yours, come to think of it. It's not fast,
0:16:31 > 0:16:33but he's on to the second ball.
0:16:33 > 0:16:36He's still on the second ball.
0:16:37 > 0:16:39Come on!
0:16:39 > 0:16:41I don't know what that was.
0:16:41 > 0:16:42Whoa!
0:16:44 > 0:16:46Come on!
0:16:46 > 0:16:49Yeah, on the Big Balls no-one can hear you scream.
0:16:49 > 0:16:50Come on, come on, come on.
0:16:50 > 0:16:54Jules if you can make the fourth ball... He's, he's...
0:16:54 > 0:16:56He's done it! He's nearly there!
0:16:56 > 0:16:58This will be the second competitor today.
0:16:58 > 0:17:00What have they all been eating?!
0:17:02 > 0:17:03Yes!
0:17:03 > 0:17:05- Come on!- Yes, he's done it!
0:17:05 > 0:17:08Just the rope swing to finish now into the Bubble Bath.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11This is...that's two competitors in one day. How does that happen?
0:17:11 > 0:17:13Yeah...let go now, Jules.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15Jules, you're covered in glory as well as mud!
0:17:15 > 0:17:18Savour the moment, you're ruining... This is...
0:17:18 > 0:17:21Yeah. That was embarrassing!
0:17:21 > 0:17:24Despite his monumental achievement on the balls,
0:17:24 > 0:17:28Muay Thai Jules has finished the Qualifier in the slowest time yet -
0:17:28 > 0:17:30five minutes 55.
0:17:30 > 0:17:34Wow! Within minutes, two contestants have crossed the Big Balls.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36This is unprecedented!
0:17:36 > 0:17:39Although, I do remember the same thing happening last series,
0:17:39 > 0:17:41so, actually, it's like completely precedented.
0:17:41 > 0:17:45But what it does mean is that Muay Thai Jules has won the right to
0:17:45 > 0:17:47have his picture hung on the Big Balls Wall of Fame.
0:17:47 > 0:17:49There is the picture. Well done.
0:17:49 > 0:17:53A reminder that I shall be unveiling the entire Big Balls Wall of Fame
0:17:53 > 0:17:56in all its glory at the end of the Qualifier.
0:17:56 > 0:17:59I'm joined at the top of the course, by British Army Officer James.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02British Army Officer James, tell me what is it that you do?
0:18:02 > 0:18:04I'm an Army Officer,
0:18:04 > 0:18:07and I'm in a cabby regiment called the King's Royal Hazzars.
0:18:07 > 0:18:10The KRH, which is quite cool fun.
0:18:10 > 0:18:13The main perk being that we get to command 12 men and...
0:18:13 > 0:18:15MUSIC: "Close To You" by The Carpenters
0:18:21 > 0:18:24Yeah, OK. This is getting uncomfortable for us all now.
0:18:24 > 0:18:26I'm not sure I want to be here.
0:18:26 > 0:18:28Yeah, all right. We've got it now.
0:18:30 > 0:18:32He was quite cool until he did all of that stuff.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35Yeah, he's just showing off now anyway.
0:18:35 > 0:18:38James, girls aren't impressed by that kind of thing.
0:18:38 > 0:18:40They see straight through it. Don't they?
0:18:40 > 0:18:44Oh, James is gonna be good. I just know it.
0:18:44 > 0:18:46Oh, come on!
0:18:46 > 0:18:47BUZZER
0:18:48 > 0:18:51Right, he's off.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53James a 25-year-old army officer is away,
0:18:53 > 0:18:56and if anyone can conquer the Total Wipeout Qualifier,
0:18:56 > 0:18:59surely it'll be the British Army.
0:18:59 > 0:19:02Whoa! This is... This IS looking good.
0:19:02 > 0:19:06On to the second set now... and that is impressive.
0:19:06 > 0:19:10On to the Sucker Punch, I thought it might have hit him.
0:19:10 > 0:19:12Looking solid. Oh, he's in!
0:19:12 > 0:19:14He even makes running through the mud look good.
0:19:14 > 0:19:19This is ridiculous. Right, can James do the third cross the Big Balls?
0:19:20 > 0:19:24Oh! Well, he gave it a pretty good shot!
0:19:24 > 0:19:25A swim now to the ladder.
0:19:25 > 0:19:30These photos were taken from Amanda's camera phone.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32I had to take it off her.
0:19:33 > 0:19:37So, his giant leaps almost carried him home all the way,
0:19:37 > 0:19:40but then he came a cropper on the third ball.
0:19:41 > 0:19:42So nearly made it!
0:19:42 > 0:19:44Just the final obstacle to go.
0:19:44 > 0:19:48Amanda's lost the power of speech entirely.
0:19:48 > 0:19:52Yes! I mean, oh, oh, no.
0:19:52 > 0:19:56Amanda's favourite just misses the Bubble Bath.
0:19:56 > 0:20:00I'm sure a certain special someone will happily run one for him later.
0:20:02 > 0:20:04Yes, all right.
0:20:05 > 0:20:08James from the King's Royal Hazzars has galloped home
0:20:08 > 0:20:11in a frighteningly quick one minute 22.
0:20:11 > 0:20:12Ooh, the King will be pleased.
0:20:12 > 0:20:16James, I might just be in love with you!
0:20:17 > 0:20:18I've always loved you.
0:20:18 > 0:20:21This is really awkward for everybody now, I-I-I...
0:20:21 > 0:20:25Right, Amanda's favourite has not only captured Amanda's heart,
0:20:25 > 0:20:27but also first place on today's leaderboard.
0:20:27 > 0:20:31His time of one minute 22 is the quickest of the series so far.
0:20:31 > 0:20:35Magnus the Viking and Cocky Carole are neck and neck in joint fourth.
0:20:35 > 0:20:39While Rippling Ruth has managed to muscle her way in to ninth place.
0:20:39 > 0:20:42And, finally, Emma has beaten Muay Thai Jules
0:20:42 > 0:20:46who despite crossing the balls, is languishing in last place.
0:20:46 > 0:20:48Next to face the Qualifier is Joe.
0:20:48 > 0:20:50An 18-year-old A-Level student from Yorkshire
0:20:50 > 0:20:53who claims to above average.
0:20:53 > 0:20:55What makes you not so average, Joe?
0:20:55 > 0:21:00Well, I do plenty of things. I wash pots at a retired vicar's home.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03Very musical, play the piano.
0:21:03 > 0:21:05I do lots of web design.
0:21:05 > 0:21:07I ski, I snowboard.
0:21:07 > 0:21:10I've got a summer job down at the beach, renting out deck chairs.
0:21:10 > 0:21:13I do lots of juggling things.
0:21:13 > 0:21:16All right, above average in many varied ways, then.
0:21:16 > 0:21:19But how is he with foam-based obstacles and mud?
0:21:19 > 0:21:22Above Average Joe sets off.
0:21:22 > 0:21:26Onto the pontoons, making his way to the Topple Towers now.
0:21:26 > 0:21:28This is far too quick for me to even attempt making a joke.
0:21:28 > 0:21:30He's just getting on with it!
0:21:30 > 0:21:32What...
0:21:32 > 0:21:35That's the best I've ever seen the Topple Towers done!
0:21:35 > 0:21:37Stunning work from Above Average Joe.
0:21:37 > 0:21:39Maybe he really is?
0:21:41 > 0:21:45Making good progress across the Sucker Punch, as well.
0:21:45 > 0:21:48- Don't tell me he's gonna clear this. - He is good.
0:21:48 > 0:21:49Onto the Big Balls.
0:21:49 > 0:21:53He hasn't got any mud on his tiny frame!
0:21:53 > 0:21:55One ball, two, three...
0:21:55 > 0:21:57Oh-ho!
0:21:57 > 0:22:00That so could have been genius!
0:22:00 > 0:22:04Yeah, but it wasn't, and neither's the swimming.
0:22:04 > 0:22:08Above Average Joe posted a nowhere near average time of one minute 48,
0:22:08 > 0:22:11nipping at the heels of Amanda.
0:22:11 > 0:22:13This is Lucy from Kidderminster.
0:22:13 > 0:22:19She's a clinical physiologist who reads brain activity for a living.
0:22:19 > 0:22:21So, using the very latest technology, let's see
0:22:21 > 0:22:24how people's brains react to the Total Wipeout course.
0:22:24 > 0:22:27When Lucy experiences pain, you'll hear this sound.
0:22:27 > 0:22:28BEEPING
0:22:28 > 0:22:31- For despair, this noise. - TOOTING
0:22:31 > 0:22:34- When Lucy feels fear, it's... - HORN BLASTS
0:22:34 > 0:22:39- And for joy - brilliant! It works. - HIGH-PITCHED RASPING
0:22:39 > 0:22:42Let's begin the experiment.
0:22:42 > 0:22:43HIGH-PITCHED RASPING
0:22:43 > 0:22:47Joy for Lucy as she floats across the first set of Topple Towers.
0:22:47 > 0:22:50- TOOTING - Quickly turning to despair.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53Oh, dear.
0:22:53 > 0:22:57No brain activity at all now, just squelching.
0:22:57 > 0:23:01- HORN BLASTS - Oh, the foghorn of fear as she realises what's next.
0:23:01 > 0:23:06- HORN BLASTS - More fear - proof that Lucy is of sound mind.
0:23:06 > 0:23:10Bit of pain registering there at the same time as fear.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12It's a new sensation - fain.
0:23:12 > 0:23:16Oh! Into the mud. Right the Big Balls now.
0:23:16 > 0:23:19How will Lucy's brain respond?
0:23:19 > 0:23:21TOOTING, BEEPING AND HORN BLASTING
0:23:21 > 0:23:24Oh, no - it's gone into overload.
0:23:24 > 0:23:26It was too much.
0:23:29 > 0:23:33Yeah, the brain goes on to complete the qualifier in three minutes 15.
0:23:33 > 0:23:37But sadly, the brainometer has been decommissioned.
0:23:37 > 0:23:41I'm joined now at the top of the course by Donovan.
0:23:41 > 0:23:44So, Donovan - can I call you Don or Donny or something?
0:23:44 > 0:23:48- Well, my friends actually call me Smooth.- Ooh, Mr Smooth?
0:23:48 > 0:23:50Yeah, Smooth. That's what I'm...
0:23:50 > 0:23:54Smooth voice, smooth personality, smooth guy all round.
0:23:54 > 0:23:56All right this is goin' out to Barack Obama,
0:23:56 > 0:24:01it's going out to my gangstas in the hood, to everyone at Gospel Oak Primary School,
0:24:01 > 0:24:04- to my friends, my family...- None of my friends every called me Smooth.
0:24:04 > 0:24:06My nickname was...no, not now.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09This is Victoria, an A Level student from Devon
0:24:09 > 0:24:14who's been trying to perfect a steely glare to take on the Total Wipeout course.
0:24:14 > 0:24:16Should I do serious? Like?
0:24:16 > 0:24:19No, I think you're confusing serious with constipated there.
0:24:19 > 0:24:25Great things come in small packages. I'm gonna blow this course apart!
0:24:25 > 0:24:29I don't think she's shouting, she's trying to connect to the internet.
0:24:29 > 0:24:31HORN BLASTS
0:24:31 > 0:24:34- Right, serious Victoria is off. - SHE SQUEALS
0:24:36 > 0:24:39Rather squeaky. This is gonna be a noisy one.
0:24:39 > 0:24:43- SHE SCREAMS - She's a...screamer
0:24:43 > 0:24:48She might be doing a plane impression, but she's rocketing
0:24:48 > 0:24:50towards the Topple Towers. Good pace so far.
0:24:50 > 0:24:53Small steps. Whoa! Making light work of those.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55Wow!
0:24:55 > 0:24:57That was like walking on water.
0:24:57 > 0:25:00Victoria thrashed the Topple Towers.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02Can she do the same to the Big Balls?
0:25:02 > 0:25:05She's a surprise this one. She's made it on to ball one.
0:25:08 > 0:25:11- TRIUMPHANT MUSIC PLAYS - This music is a good sign.
0:25:11 > 0:25:15Onto ball three. This could be a historic moment.
0:25:15 > 0:25:18This is...ball 4! Leap, Victoria!
0:25:18 > 0:25:20Go on! She's done it!
0:25:20 > 0:25:23Three ball hoppers in one show,
0:25:23 > 0:25:26and I...I wouldn't have foreseen any of them.
0:25:26 > 0:25:29Trouble with the Velcro, but it's looking good.
0:25:29 > 0:25:31Oh, it's looking bad.
0:25:31 > 0:25:33Oh, me oh my.
0:25:33 > 0:25:36After a less than impressive finish,
0:25:36 > 0:25:40Victoria still has an impressive time of two minutes 6 seconds.
0:25:40 > 0:25:43So, what a day it has been so far.
0:25:43 > 0:25:46Three competitors have crossed the seemingly impassable big red balls
0:25:46 > 0:25:48in the same show.
0:25:48 > 0:25:52First Liza, then Jules and now serious Victoria.
0:25:52 > 0:25:56There is only one accolade to bestow on Victoria.
0:25:56 > 0:25:59Let's hope no-one else does it or we're gonna need a new wall.
0:26:02 > 0:26:05Victoria's picture will be going on the Big Balls wall of fame.
0:26:05 > 0:26:09Don't forget the grand unveiling is coming up later. It's exciting.
0:26:09 > 0:26:12OK, five contestants to go on the qualifier.
0:26:12 > 0:26:14So, it's now time to... Hang on.
0:26:14 > 0:26:18I haven't seen how Donovan got on. Can I go back to Donovan?
0:26:18 > 0:26:22What is that signal supposed to mean? Is that a yes?
0:26:22 > 0:26:26As you may remember, we left him thanking everybody from his mum
0:26:26 > 0:26:30to the baggage handlers at Luton Airport. Let's see how he's doing.
0:26:30 > 0:26:33..to everybody, everyone in the hood, my gangstas,
0:26:33 > 0:26:38goin' out to everybody, yeah. I love you all. Just keep your eyes on me, OK?
0:26:38 > 0:26:41Oh, yeah. This is Dave from Liverpool. He's 27.
0:26:41 > 0:26:44This is Briony from Cardiff. She's 22.
0:26:44 > 0:26:49And this is Kevin from Essex, he's 46. What do they have in common?
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Any idea?
0:26:51 > 0:26:52Nothing?
0:26:52 > 0:26:57Oh, I've just remembered. You can hear me but I can't hear you.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00They are all professional sports men and women.
0:27:00 > 0:27:04Dave belonged to the British bobsleigh team
0:27:04 > 0:27:08and is used to falling down hills at nearly 100 mph so this should be good.
0:27:08 > 0:27:12Watch out cos I'm the fastest thing on two feet! Go!
0:27:12 > 0:27:18Fastest thing on two feet? You're actually on your...not your feet.
0:27:18 > 0:27:20I'm Kev, I'm fat, I'm old.
0:27:20 > 0:27:25- Participation's the only part. Come on!- That's my favourite shout out ever.
0:27:25 > 0:27:28"I'm fat, I'm old!" How does ex-Millwall footballer Kevin
0:27:28 > 0:27:31stack up against a bobsleigh champion?
0:27:31 > 0:27:34Anyone still taking bets on the bobsleigh bloke?
0:27:34 > 0:27:37Briony belongs to the British pole vaulting team,
0:27:37 > 0:27:40so let's join her at the Sucker Punch.
0:27:45 > 0:27:48Oh, you punched a pole vaulter.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51# Hey, sucker... #
0:27:51 > 0:27:55Yeah, I think there's a pun in that song. Don't know who chose that.
0:27:55 > 0:27:57As you can tell from all the mud,
0:27:57 > 0:28:01Downhill Dave did brilliantly on the Sucker Punch.
0:28:01 > 0:28:04This man falls for a living, so don't hold your breath.
0:28:04 > 0:28:06Although you probably should.
0:28:06 > 0:28:09I hope he has, in fact.
0:28:09 > 0:28:13Hardly the quickest thing on two feet, but Downhill Dave
0:28:13 > 0:28:16does go on to finish the course in two minutes and 23 seconds.
0:28:16 > 0:28:21The human pole vault goes for a big finish.
0:28:21 > 0:28:23Here we go.
0:28:23 > 0:28:25And she makes it but not the right way up.
0:28:25 > 0:28:27Did she go in head first?
0:28:27 > 0:28:31Despite being smacked in the face, falling foul of the Big Balls
0:28:31 > 0:28:34and a dramatic entry into the bubble bath,
0:28:34 > 0:28:37she still manages a very respectable one minute 41.
0:28:37 > 0:28:41Now back to ex-professional footballer Kevin.
0:28:41 > 0:28:44Come on, you Lions! That's what the fans call Millwall FC.
0:28:44 > 0:28:47Somebody told me.
0:28:47 > 0:28:49Come on, then.
0:28:49 > 0:28:52- Get on with it. - Big Balls, you're mine!
0:28:52 > 0:28:54I wouldn't boast about it.
0:28:54 > 0:28:57Oh, that didn't last long, did it?
0:28:57 > 0:29:01A good attempt. Unfortunately, a breathless Kevin
0:29:01 > 0:29:04was unable to complete the course.
0:29:08 > 0:29:11- ..everyone in the hood... - Oh, good - it's Donovan again.
0:29:11 > 0:29:16Just keep your eyes on me, OK? Nuff love and respect.
0:29:17 > 0:29:20- How's that? - Uh, could you run it by me again?
0:29:20 > 0:29:24He hasn't half built himself up. This had better be good.
0:29:24 > 0:29:27We'll join him on the Sucker Punch.
0:29:29 > 0:29:34Donovan's plan to defeat the Sucker Punch is to avoid being punched.
0:29:34 > 0:29:36Tactics.
0:29:36 > 0:29:39Oh, dear. No. Might need a bit of work on that.
0:29:39 > 0:29:42He obviously didn't make any plans for getting out of the mud.
0:29:42 > 0:29:44Shame.
0:29:46 > 0:29:50Right, On and On Donovan does have a plan for the Big Balls -
0:29:50 > 0:29:53bypass the first one and jump straight onto the second.
0:29:53 > 0:29:57That's what he said. I can't wait to see it.
0:29:57 > 0:29:59Come on, Donovan.
0:29:59 > 0:30:01Yes!
0:30:01 > 0:30:03Oh, come on. Go with the plan.
0:30:03 > 0:30:07Why make a plan when you're not going to carry it out?
0:30:07 > 0:30:11Now to the ladder before a swing and a bubble bath.
0:30:11 > 0:30:13Yeah.
0:30:13 > 0:30:16- Still feeling smooth? - # Mull of Kintyre... #
0:30:16 > 0:30:21He chose this music. It's his favourite.
0:30:21 > 0:30:23He'll deny it, but it is.
0:30:23 > 0:30:28Despite swallowing half the water around the Big Balls,
0:30:28 > 0:30:32Donovan completes the course in a pretty good two minutes, 4 seconds.
0:30:33 > 0:30:37Meet Carlos - today's final competitor.
0:30:37 > 0:30:40He's keen, he's fit and he's from Bristol.
0:30:40 > 0:30:43- Carlos, how are you doing?- I'm all right, my love. How are you?
0:30:43 > 0:30:46BRISTOL ACCENT: I'm all right too!
0:30:46 > 0:30:49How are you going to tackle the qualifier today?
0:30:49 > 0:30:53With speed and force. I'm the shortest lad here
0:30:53 > 0:30:55and I think I've got to use that to my advantage.
0:30:55 > 0:31:00The fastest thing to leave Bristol used to be Concorde. Now you've met me. Come on!
0:31:00 > 0:31:04Just a surprise every time he opens his mouth.
0:31:04 > 0:31:07I don't expect that.
0:31:07 > 0:31:10Speedy start then, from Concorde Carlos.
0:31:11 > 0:31:14Oh, flies across the Topple Towers.
0:31:14 > 0:31:18He'll need to keep this up if he wants to make it into the top 12.
0:31:18 > 0:31:22Carlos likes to travel. Which route will he take across the Big Balls?
0:31:22 > 0:31:24I wonder.
0:31:24 > 0:31:27A scenic and wet one.
0:31:27 > 0:31:30That was quite a leap.
0:31:30 > 0:31:34Concorde Carlos may not be as fast as the plane,
0:31:34 > 0:31:36but he flies pretty much as high.
0:31:36 > 0:31:39Messed up the landing a bit, there. Not gone well.
0:31:39 > 0:31:43Just the bubble bath to go and it'll all be over.
0:31:43 > 0:31:46Oh, neat! A textbook landing there to complete the qualifier
0:31:46 > 0:31:50in a sound-barrier breaking one minute, 36.
0:31:50 > 0:31:51Here comes the final leader board.
0:31:51 > 0:31:55Amanda's favourite has fought valiantly to win both the qualifier
0:31:55 > 0:31:57and Amanda's heart with the fastest time of the series.
0:31:57 > 0:32:00Dog handler Chris beats Above-Average Joe by one second,
0:32:00 > 0:32:03with On-and-On Donovan squeezing into sixth place.
0:32:03 > 0:32:07The first of today's ball beaters to go through is Serious Victoria,
0:32:07 > 0:32:10followed by Jonny Zorro and Downhill Dave.
0:32:10 > 0:32:13And finally, Magnus the Viking has pillaged his way into tenth place,
0:32:13 > 0:32:17along with the last of the ballsome threesome, Advertiser Eliza.
0:32:17 > 0:32:22In a moment, I will unveil the Big Balls Wall of Fame.
0:32:22 > 0:32:28But before that, here's a fitting tribute in honour of those eight competitors who fell.
0:32:28 > 0:32:33Here's to what I lovingly call the big, fat losers.
0:33:35 > 0:33:38So, after two series and 320 competitors,
0:33:38 > 0:33:42only nine have managed to cross the Big Red Balls.
0:33:42 > 0:33:44It's time to honour them now.
0:33:44 > 0:33:50It gives me great pleasure to officially open the Big Balls Wall of Fame.
0:33:50 > 0:33:53RECORDED APPLAUSE
0:33:53 > 0:33:56FIRE ALARM, SCREAMING
0:33:58 > 0:34:02"The best money could buy," they said.
0:34:02 > 0:34:04"Lighting made of neon," they said.
0:34:04 > 0:34:07Let's just move on to the Sweeper.
0:34:11 > 0:34:15All 12 competitors must avoid being thrashed by a ruddy great red stick
0:34:15 > 0:34:18and stay on their podiums.
0:34:18 > 0:34:21The last six to stay high and dry go through.
0:34:21 > 0:34:25What could be a more fitting finale to the series than returning to where it all began?
0:34:25 > 0:34:27The classic Sweeper.
0:34:27 > 0:34:30For those who haven't seen the show before...why not?!
0:34:30 > 0:34:35I've got three words for you - BBC, i and player.
0:34:35 > 0:34:40Time for a reminder of which 12 are still competing for the £10,000 prize.
0:34:40 > 0:34:43On podium one is advertiser Eliza.
0:34:43 > 0:34:47Guys, I know I like to be swept off my feet, but now it's your turn.
0:34:47 > 0:34:50On podiums two, three and four
0:34:50 > 0:34:52are Cocky Carol, Downhill Dave
0:34:52 > 0:34:54and On-and-On Donovan.
0:34:54 > 0:34:58This is goin' out to Barack Obama, my friends, my family,
0:34:58 > 0:35:01to my gangstas in the hood, my gangstas in the ghetto.
0:35:01 > 0:35:03Can I do it? Yes, I can.
0:35:03 > 0:35:06That's probably a Bob The Builder reference.
0:35:06 > 0:35:10On podium five is Amanda's favourite - James.
0:35:10 > 0:35:14Guys, I'm above all of you - literally. You've got no chance.
0:35:14 > 0:35:18On podium six and seven are the human pole vault Briony
0:35:18 > 0:35:21- and Concorde Carlos.- I may have been second in the qualifier,
0:35:21 > 0:35:24but this podium's holding the last one standing.
0:35:24 > 0:35:28On eight and nine are Serious Victoria,
0:35:28 > 0:35:34- and Jonny Zorro.- James, you're gonna experience a water tank very soon!
0:35:34 > 0:35:38On ten and eleven are Magnus the Viking and Above Average Joe.
0:35:38 > 0:35:42Donovan, you better don your life jacket cos you're going DOWN!
0:35:42 > 0:35:46And on podium 12 is dog handler Chris.
0:35:46 > 0:35:50This dog handler's gonna take the Sweeper by the lead. Bow-wow!
0:35:50 > 0:35:53It's time for a sweeping adventure.
0:35:53 > 0:35:57Yup, it's the Sweeper. Are you all ready?
0:35:57 > 0:35:59ALL: YES!
0:35:59 > 0:36:02Hearing a few nos, but let's do it anyway.
0:36:02 > 0:36:053...2...1.
0:36:05 > 0:36:08HORN BLASTS
0:36:08 > 0:36:11It's the return of...hang on.
0:36:11 > 0:36:13Eliza's down already,
0:36:13 > 0:36:17followed by Cocky Carol and Downhill Dave.
0:36:17 > 0:36:20An amazing start.
0:36:20 > 0:36:22We've lost three already.
0:36:22 > 0:36:27Eliza's dreams of macaroni cheese and trifle have just vanished.
0:36:28 > 0:36:32It came towards me and it totally wiped me out.
0:36:32 > 0:36:36Eliza's wipeout distracts the two contestants behind her
0:36:36 > 0:36:40so Cocky Carol goes in and Downhill Dave keeps things neat
0:36:40 > 0:36:43by using the same point of entry into the water.
0:36:43 > 0:36:46It's different from bobsleighing.
0:36:46 > 0:36:50I'm not in my comfort zone here. In a bobsleigh, I'm happy.
0:36:50 > 0:36:54Watch carefully - Johnny Zorro also falls in on the first sweep.
0:36:54 > 0:36:58It's very wobbly and the soft bit at the top of the podium...
0:36:58 > 0:37:02it's really hard to get your balance back once it's gone.
0:37:02 > 0:37:06So, four gone. The next two to fall are out of the game.
0:37:06 > 0:37:09Only six contestants can go through to the Dreadmill.
0:37:09 > 0:37:13Donovan counting to see how many are left.
0:37:13 > 0:37:16Or maybe how many people he'll thank if he wins.
0:37:16 > 0:37:19Great performance from the remaining contenders.
0:37:19 > 0:37:22Still in the game - Donovan, James, Briony,
0:37:22 > 0:37:26Carlos, Victoria, Magnus, Joe and Chris.
0:37:28 > 0:37:32But not only is the Sweeper getting faster with every revolution,
0:37:32 > 0:37:35it's also getting higher.
0:37:35 > 0:37:38Which might not be a problem for 6'5" James,
0:37:38 > 0:37:42but could be an issue for Serious Victoria, who's 5'2".
0:37:42 > 0:37:46She might be able to duck under the Sweeper soon.
0:37:49 > 0:37:51They might be here for some time.
0:37:51 > 0:37:53Lucky I've brought my Sudoku book.
0:37:53 > 0:37:56It's getting faster!
0:37:56 > 0:37:59Look at the speed of it - the next one to get hit
0:37:59 > 0:38:03will be on the way back to England through sheer momentum.
0:38:05 > 0:38:08Oh! Victoria falls and Magnus the Viking.
0:38:08 > 0:38:12When I say Victoria falls, I don't mean, you know...
0:38:12 > 0:38:13Falls.
0:38:15 > 0:38:16I want to cry.
0:38:16 > 0:38:20Magnus the Viking also fell
0:38:20 > 0:38:24and got his face pinged by the podium, so he's out too.
0:38:26 > 0:38:30To be the 7th one to not get into the top 6...gutted.
0:38:30 > 0:38:34So here are the final six now playing for...
0:38:34 > 0:38:36Whoa! Donovan, James, Briony...
0:38:36 > 0:38:40and Carlos as well in one sweep.
0:38:40 > 0:38:45That's staggering. Donovan is carried by the Sweeper into James.
0:38:45 > 0:38:49Briony looks like she doesn't care cos she knows she's through.
0:38:49 > 0:38:54Concorde Carlos is confused - he kinda forgets to jump.
0:38:54 > 0:38:56That's Sweeper gold.
0:38:56 > 0:38:59I've never seen anything like that.
0:38:59 > 0:39:03Then there were two - dog-handler Christ and Above Average Joe
0:39:03 > 0:39:07fighting for the honour of being the last man standing.
0:39:07 > 0:39:10Both of them are through - this is just about pride.
0:39:10 > 0:39:13Who goes next? That's Chris.
0:39:13 > 0:39:16Congratulations to Joe
0:39:16 > 0:39:21who holds onto his above average title as well as the last man standing.
0:39:21 > 0:39:22Woo!
0:39:22 > 0:39:24So the six remaining contestants
0:39:24 > 0:39:29must now face the most feared thing in the whole of the United Kingdom
0:39:29 > 0:39:33of Great Britain and Northern Ireland - no, it's not spiders.
0:39:33 > 0:39:34Or monsters.
0:39:34 > 0:39:37Or the recession. Or climate change.
0:39:37 > 0:39:41Uh, you could make a claim for climate change but it's not...
0:39:41 > 0:39:46I've opened a can of worms here. I should have just said it's the Dreadmill.
0:39:53 > 0:39:56A reminder of how today's Dreadmill works.
0:39:56 > 0:40:01It's the door jam - where six contestants will be paired off
0:40:01 > 0:40:04into three head-to-head heats. The first through all the doors
0:40:04 > 0:40:09and past the finish line will win the heat and qualify for the Wipeout Zone.
0:40:09 > 0:40:13The losers of each heat will more than likely experience a free swim
0:40:13 > 0:40:16in the pool of despair.
0:40:20 > 0:40:24So let's have a reminder of the lucky six Dreadmillers.
0:40:24 > 0:40:26I wash pots at a retired vicars' home.
0:40:26 > 0:40:29First of all, he's not your average Joe -
0:40:29 > 0:40:32Above Average Joe.
0:40:32 > 0:40:33HE HOWLS
0:40:33 > 0:40:36Sit, heel, fall in the water.
0:40:36 > 0:40:38Good boy. It's dog-handler Chris.
0:40:41 > 0:40:45Pole-vaulting's her life. It's the human pole vault Briony.
0:40:45 > 0:40:47All right, my love?
0:40:47 > 0:40:50Supersonic Bristolian - it's Concorde Carlos.
0:40:50 > 0:40:52Come on!
0:40:52 > 0:40:57He hasn't stopped talking since... I don't think he's ever stopped.
0:40:57 > 0:41:00- It's On-and-On Donovan. - Can I do it? Yes, I can.
0:41:00 > 0:41:03- Attention!- I fancy him to do well
0:41:03 > 0:41:08and Amanda just fancies him. It's her favourite, James.
0:41:08 > 0:41:11So who will face who in the heats?
0:41:11 > 0:41:15This week they tried a different approach to select the Dreadmill fixtures.
0:41:15 > 0:41:19Using a supercomputer found in a skip.
0:41:19 > 0:41:22I think it was a microwave.
0:41:22 > 0:41:25So they picked names out of a hat.
0:41:25 > 0:41:29The first battle is between Concorde Carlos and Above Average Joe.
0:41:29 > 0:41:32Pretty pleased that I've got him.
0:41:32 > 0:41:35More so than anyone. However, he has been a dark horse.
0:41:35 > 0:41:38Not So Average Jo can pull out another top performance
0:41:38 > 0:41:44and he can...he can do it against Carlos and come out on top.
0:41:44 > 0:41:473...2...1.
0:41:47 > 0:41:50When he said do it against Carlos there...
0:41:50 > 0:41:53It may be a gentle stroll at the start,
0:41:53 > 0:41:56but once the klaxon goes, all hell will break loose
0:41:56 > 0:41:59as they propel through the doors.
0:41:59 > 0:42:02They are off. No, try not to fall!
0:42:02 > 0:42:06That's Joe - an early bath.
0:42:06 > 0:42:10Carlos is out too, but he's already won.
0:42:10 > 0:42:12And he knows it.
0:42:12 > 0:42:16- What happened?- Just lost my footing at the door.
0:42:16 > 0:42:19- Came off.- It was as easy as that?
0:42:19 > 0:42:21Yeah.
0:42:21 > 0:42:23One battle down, two to go.
0:42:23 > 0:42:26Dog Handler Chris versus On-and-On Donovan.
0:42:26 > 0:42:30I want it more than Donovan. I want it like Rocky in Eye Of The Tiger
0:42:30 > 0:42:33going into the last fight and Mickey tells him to get up and go again.
0:42:33 > 0:42:37- That's me. I need to do it now. - I've got Chris,
0:42:37 > 0:42:40and in the words of Barack Obama, can I do it? Yes, I can.
0:42:40 > 0:42:44- Donovan definitely needs some new patter.- 3...2...1.
0:42:44 > 0:42:47Well, only one can go through.
0:42:47 > 0:42:50Donovan's got the stamina -
0:42:50 > 0:42:56when it comes to talking - but will his physical fitness see him through?
0:42:56 > 0:42:59- They're waiting for the klaxon. - KLAXON BLARES
0:42:59 > 0:43:03Both of them are away quickly.
0:43:03 > 0:43:07Through the first door.
0:43:07 > 0:43:09They're pushing through door 2.
0:43:09 > 0:43:12This is very close.
0:43:12 > 0:43:15Just one door remaining. Oh, no!
0:43:15 > 0:43:18Chris is over, dragged down. He's out.
0:43:18 > 0:43:23That was so close until Chris's fall. What a competition.
0:43:23 > 0:43:27That's the closest Dreadmill I think I've ever seen.
0:43:27 > 0:43:30You were this close. What happened?
0:43:30 > 0:43:34I think I stumbled at the start and pulled the door the wrong way.
0:43:34 > 0:43:38The two of us were so competitive - somebody had to win.
0:43:38 > 0:43:41This man did - fair play.
0:43:41 > 0:43:44Human pole-vault Briony versus Amanda's favourite.
0:43:44 > 0:43:48I hope I make James look like a lumbering old man. I hope he falls.
0:43:48 > 0:43:51I hope he falls on his face.
0:43:51 > 0:43:55If I do lose to a girl, friends and soldiers alike
0:43:55 > 0:43:58will destroy me with banter and abuse.
0:43:58 > 0:44:003...2...1!
0:44:00 > 0:44:04Amanda's going to be jealous of all the one-on-one time.
0:44:04 > 0:44:10Although James is chivalrous, he won't want to let a lady through the door first here.
0:44:10 > 0:44:15- Briony was third in the qualifier. - KLAXON BLARES
0:44:15 > 0:44:19The race is on. Both through the first door.
0:44:19 > 0:44:22Briony is down and straight into the pool of despair.
0:44:22 > 0:44:25That was over so quickly.
0:44:25 > 0:44:27James is carrying on regardless.
0:44:27 > 0:44:30He's just showing off.
0:44:30 > 0:44:33She's already impressed, mate.
0:44:33 > 0:44:36I would say it was close, but he really got ahead of you.
0:44:36 > 0:44:43- I didn't even get under the first gate.- It was gonna be one way or the other - he's so tall.
0:44:43 > 0:44:49- Either you were going to battle ahead, but he really was stronger than you.- He did really well.
0:44:49 > 0:44:52Today's three finalists are Concorde Carlos, On-And-On Donovan
0:44:52 > 0:44:57and Amanda's favourite James. Here's how they made it this far.
0:45:00 > 0:45:03To have made it to the Wipeout Zone feels surreal.
0:45:03 > 0:45:07I've been to university before and I thought that was scary.
0:45:07 > 0:45:10But coming here and doing this course...whoa. That's scary.
0:45:10 > 0:45:15I think the Wipeout Zone is a more than worthy obstacle for me.
0:45:15 > 0:45:19I can almost guarantee that I'm going to come off at one point.
0:45:19 > 0:45:24I'm feeling...relatively scared. The course itself
0:45:24 > 0:45:28looks very punishing. My competitors are both taller,
0:45:28 > 0:45:30very fast individuals.
0:45:30 > 0:45:35I would have to say that Carlos has slipped under the radar.
0:45:35 > 0:45:38He's never spoken about getting this far.
0:45:38 > 0:45:42Donovan? He's been an unsteady legend.
0:45:42 > 0:45:45He's always so nervous before everything he does,
0:45:45 > 0:45:48yet he always pulls it out the bag when the moment comes
0:45:48 > 0:45:50and puts in an amazing performance.
0:45:50 > 0:45:55I think if Donovan hits the water tonight, he'll panic.
0:45:55 > 0:45:58The posh boy's definitely done good.
0:45:58 > 0:46:01He's done himself and the army a credit.
0:46:01 > 0:46:04They've trained him well.
0:46:04 > 0:46:08Tonight, I do feel under pressure.
0:46:08 > 0:46:11I'm against two fairly lean, mean proven athletes.
0:46:11 > 0:46:17I want that ten grand, so I'm going to blitz this course as fast as I can.
0:46:17 > 0:46:21I have got the self-belief to be Total Wipeout Champion tonight.
0:46:21 > 0:46:26As long as my competitors take that one wrong step, that's my game.
0:46:26 > 0:46:30To win tonight, I think, would be absolutely amazing.
0:46:30 > 0:46:33There's £10,000 at stake
0:46:33 > 0:46:36and to have got this far, I think it'll be a huge shame to not win it.
0:46:42 > 0:46:46So, the final Wipeout Zone and I'm expecting a big finish.
0:46:46 > 0:46:49It's that classic age-old battle
0:46:49 > 0:46:53of soldier, versus chatterbox versus Bristolian.
0:46:53 > 0:46:56One of them will be taking home £10,000
0:46:56 > 0:46:58but before they do, they'll have to face this.
0:47:03 > 0:47:08Here are the ultimate obstacles facing the contestants
0:47:08 > 0:47:10in the Wipeout Zone.
0:47:10 > 0:47:13Killer Surf - one big headache.
0:47:13 > 0:47:16The Barrel Run - shin-ache.
0:47:19 > 0:47:21The Bars - arm-ache.
0:47:21 > 0:47:24The Spinner -
0:47:24 > 0:47:26uh...stomach ache.
0:47:26 > 0:47:29The Brusher - almost certain heartache.
0:47:29 > 0:47:33Finally, the Launch Pads - everything-ache.
0:47:33 > 0:47:36The clock stops and the quickest time will win the ten grand.
0:47:36 > 0:47:39Now, before the finalists begin their quests,
0:47:39 > 0:47:44the BBC asked me to go over to Argentina to report from the Wipeout Zone in person.
0:47:44 > 0:47:50I said, "How about you send me to a seven-star hotel in Dubai for a week instead?"
0:47:50 > 0:47:54They said, "How about a trip to the Jobcentre?"
0:47:54 > 0:47:58Long story short, here are my dos and don'ts for the Wipeout Zone.
0:48:04 > 0:48:07Yup, just completed the Wipeout Zone.
0:48:07 > 0:48:1354 seconds. Smashed it - new record that will never be broken.
0:48:13 > 0:48:16So the Wipeout Zone is deserted.
0:48:16 > 0:48:18I'm all alone.
0:48:18 > 0:48:22Well, apart from a cameraman, a sound man, camera assistant,
0:48:22 > 0:48:25small gallery over there with the producer in it
0:48:25 > 0:48:28and a man in a suit we think might be from the BBC.
0:48:28 > 0:48:31So, all alone then, for my dos and don'ts for success
0:48:31 > 0:48:33on the Wipeout Zone.
0:48:33 > 0:48:36Don't think, "Oh, I love trampolines!"
0:48:49 > 0:48:52Do check that your life insurance is up to date
0:48:52 > 0:48:54and it covers you for pretty much anything.
0:48:59 > 0:49:04Don't mistake the barrels for a harmless, knockabout video game.
0:49:11 > 0:49:14Do look before you leap.
0:49:19 > 0:49:23Don't keep getting our trophy wet. We've lost the rust-proofing guarantee.
0:49:28 > 0:49:32Those are my dos and don'ts for success in the Wipeout Zone.
0:49:32 > 0:49:35What am I gonna do now I'm here?
0:49:36 > 0:49:38HE TOOTS BUZZER
0:49:39 > 0:49:41TOOTS BUZZER
0:49:41 > 0:49:45- TOOTS BUZZER - Yup, that'll keep me occupied.
0:49:45 > 0:49:46TOOT
0:49:46 > 0:49:50So the three finalists Amanda's favourite James,
0:49:50 > 0:49:52Concorde Carlos, On-And-On Donovan.
0:49:52 > 0:49:57The stage is set. Let the battle commence. Amanda?
0:49:57 > 0:50:00This is it - the climax, the crescendo,
0:50:00 > 0:50:04the bit at the end...it's the Wipeout Zone.
0:50:04 > 0:50:07And up at the start line, it's Carlos.
0:50:07 > 0:50:12Will Concorde Carlos go supersonic or just end up obsolete?
0:50:12 > 0:50:16- Let's get ready to rock 'n' roll. Come on!- You can. We'll watch.
0:50:16 > 0:50:19And we're away.
0:50:19 > 0:50:23It's an extremely competitive field, so Carlos needs a quick start.
0:50:27 > 0:50:31He's making the swim to the Barrel Run.
0:50:33 > 0:50:35Here come the barrels.
0:50:36 > 0:50:38And Carlos...
0:50:38 > 0:50:41Oh, he's stumbled already!
0:50:42 > 0:50:44He's forcing his way past them.
0:50:44 > 0:50:47He looks a bit more confident.
0:50:49 > 0:50:52Good recovery.
0:50:52 > 0:50:53Now onto the Monkey Bars.
0:50:53 > 0:50:56Slippery, of course.
0:50:56 > 0:51:00Carlos really has taken the bit between his teeth.
0:51:00 > 0:51:04This is a quick time. He is sailing through so far.
0:51:04 > 0:51:06The Spinner next.
0:51:06 > 0:51:09First, he's got to get on. Now the dismount -
0:51:09 > 0:51:13this is where it gets tricky. So many fall here.
0:51:13 > 0:51:14He's off.
0:51:14 > 0:51:20Ooh! That was one of the smoothest mistakes I've ever seen.
0:51:20 > 0:51:25Right, the Brusher. This can be heartache for so many competitors!
0:51:25 > 0:51:26There you go!
0:51:26 > 0:51:31There is yet another one brushed off. Carlos just gets caught
0:51:31 > 0:51:33by one of its giant bristles.
0:51:33 > 0:51:36That's his only slip-up so far, though.
0:51:36 > 0:51:39Still a good time, Safely onto Launch Pad number one.
0:51:39 > 0:51:41Weighing up the second, now.
0:51:41 > 0:51:46If he makes it, he will set a very good benchmark time.
0:51:46 > 0:51:50He's on... Just one more leap to the finish! Steady...
0:51:50 > 0:51:54And a lovely jump! Carlos completes the Wipeout Zone
0:51:54 > 0:51:57- with just one mistake.- ARRRGGH!
0:51:57 > 0:51:59So, down to Amanda.
0:51:59 > 0:52:03- Well done you, Carlos! That was unbelievable!- Thank you!
0:52:03 > 0:52:07- How you feeling?- It was excellent. Absolutely excellent.
0:52:07 > 0:52:11Knackered, excited, can't explain how I'm feeling right now!
0:52:11 > 0:52:15- That was unbelievable!- I can tell you right now that your time tonight
0:52:15 > 0:52:18was 1 minute and 47 seconds!
0:52:18 > 0:52:22- I'm pleased with that.- The next contestant up tonight is Donovan.
0:52:22 > 0:52:24Let's watch.
0:52:27 > 0:52:30This is for my friends, my family! Awooga!
0:52:30 > 0:52:34Not going to name them all this time? OK, got things on.
0:52:34 > 0:52:38Donovan needs to beat Carlos's 1 minute 47 to be in with a chance.
0:52:41 > 0:52:43That's a strong swim.
0:52:43 > 0:52:47- Straight away! Maybe he's gonna do it.- Come on!
0:52:47 > 0:52:52This is pre-greased to be incredibly slippery.
0:52:55 > 0:52:58Then onto the Barrel Run itself. He doesn't just talk the talk.
0:52:58 > 0:53:02He is making the barrels look very easy!
0:53:02 > 0:53:06How does that feel, watching On-And-On Donovan
0:53:06 > 0:53:10leaping away like this? Onto the bars, the next obstacle
0:53:10 > 0:53:14between him and the possible £10,000 paycheck.
0:53:14 > 0:53:17And he's run through that... Not a problem.
0:53:18 > 0:53:23- Come on, Donovan!- Now, onto the Spinner.
0:53:23 > 0:53:26Carlos was very quick on... Donovan does need to get a move on,
0:53:26 > 0:53:30but it's getting off this that's tricky.
0:53:33 > 0:53:37Wasting time, there. The longer he's there, the dizzier he'll get.
0:53:37 > 0:53:41He's got to go for the jump now to stay in the game.
0:53:41 > 0:53:44He's stayed on. That was a good landing.
0:53:44 > 0:53:47I'd be nervous if I was Carlos now, watching this.
0:53:47 > 0:53:50The Brusher, if he makes this...
0:53:50 > 0:53:52Donovan picking his moment.
0:53:52 > 0:53:55Takes the moment, and it's the wrong moment!
0:53:55 > 0:53:58Oh, just like Carlos, then.
0:53:58 > 0:54:01The Brusher has dispatched Donovan into the waters below.
0:54:01 > 0:54:05That could cost him it. Doesn't look like he'll beat Carlos's time now.
0:54:05 > 0:54:08He jumps... Oh!
0:54:08 > 0:54:11He'll never get back up... He has!
0:54:13 > 0:54:15One Launch Pad to go.
0:54:15 > 0:54:18He's tired now. He's feeling it.
0:54:18 > 0:54:23Definitely one for the dramatic pause, Donovan - onto the second...
0:54:23 > 0:54:25Oh! No!
0:54:25 > 0:54:30That's gotta hurt! He jumped but kept on going.
0:54:35 > 0:54:38Second attempt. First Launch Pad.
0:54:46 > 0:54:49Onto the second one, no mistakes this time round.
0:54:49 > 0:54:54One more jump and On-And-On Donovan's ordeal is over.
0:54:54 > 0:54:58He doesn't yet know his or Carlos's time, remember.
0:54:58 > 0:55:02Great sportsmanship from Concorde Carlos. And Donovan is finished.
0:55:02 > 0:55:07Donovan, you weren't smooth enough tonight, because Carlos has been quicker than you,
0:55:07 > 0:55:10so you'll have to join the rest of the gang. Sorry.
0:55:10 > 0:55:13- Well done!- Well done.
0:55:13 > 0:55:15Look out, here comes the cavalry!
0:55:15 > 0:55:18Time to ride! Yee-ha!
0:55:18 > 0:55:21KLAXON
0:55:26 > 0:55:30And Amanda's favourite is in the water! James set a new record
0:55:30 > 0:55:34and comfortably won his Dreadmill heat.
0:55:34 > 0:55:37But now, he faces beating Carlos's amazing time.
0:55:37 > 0:55:40This is quite a challenge ahead of him.
0:55:40 > 0:55:45Onto the Barrel Run. James's 6'5" frame clearly an advantage here,
0:55:45 > 0:55:48as in bars and just about everywhere else, I've no doubt.
0:55:50 > 0:55:54Actually, that height could be a hindrance on the Monkey Bars.
0:55:54 > 0:55:58There's a lot of him to haul across, but he's doing it easily.
0:55:58 > 0:56:00Easily! Onto The Spinner...
0:56:00 > 0:56:03James is just dispatching this!
0:56:03 > 0:56:06Makes the transfer safely!
0:56:08 > 0:56:12Onto the Brusher, he's taken two, now three..
0:56:12 > 0:56:15Clean sweep for the Brusher this week.
0:56:15 > 0:56:18James loses his footing and is down.
0:56:18 > 0:56:21Carlos's chances of winning have just improved.
0:56:21 > 0:56:25Launch Pads... One...
0:56:25 > 0:56:28He did one and two in one go!
0:56:28 > 0:56:33That is mission complete for Amanda's favourite. An amazing run!
0:56:33 > 0:56:37James has smashed the Wipeout Zone in a record-breaking time.
0:56:37 > 0:56:40Time for Amanda to crown today's champion.
0:56:40 > 0:56:44You were pretty incredible, but I've also got to tell you
0:56:44 > 0:56:46that Carlos was unbelievable.
0:56:46 > 0:56:49Carlos, your time was super-speedy,
0:56:49 > 0:56:53and on any other night, it'd have been fast enough, but not tonight,
0:56:53 > 0:56:59because James, you are the Total Wipeout Champion!
0:56:59 > 0:57:02You were awesome!
0:57:05 > 0:57:09What a record-breaking show - three successful Ball crossings,
0:57:09 > 0:57:13and today's champion, James Scott,
0:57:13 > 0:57:18recorded the fastest qualifier time of this series, and the fastest time EVER for the Wipeout Zone.
0:57:18 > 0:57:21So, that's it. The end of the quest.
0:57:21 > 0:57:26But now things get serious, because this week's finalists have booked their last places
0:57:26 > 0:57:30in what will be the ultimate battle between man and...padded foam.
0:57:32 > 0:57:34Yes, the wait is over.
0:57:34 > 0:57:36Eight champions,
0:57:36 > 0:57:39and those they vanquished in the Wipeout Zone.
0:57:40 > 0:57:43It's going to be a clash of the Titans.
0:57:46 > 0:57:50The ultimate competition for the ultimate accolade.
0:57:50 > 0:57:54The crowning of the Supreme Total Wipeout Champion.
0:57:54 > 0:57:57So book yourself a ringside seat.
0:58:04 > 0:58:09Amanda and I will see you next time for Total Wipeout - The Final. Goodbye.
0:58:17 > 0:58:20Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:58:20 > 0:58:23E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk