Celebrity Special 1

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0:00:02 > 0:00:05St Tropez. The Bahamas.

0:00:05 > 0:00:08Richard Hammond's Waffle and Cheese Emporium in West Woodhay.

0:00:08 > 0:00:11These are all places celebrities like to visit,

0:00:11 > 0:00:15as opposed to Buenos Aires, Argentina, where famous people

0:00:15 > 0:00:18go to get covered in mud and smacked in the face.

0:00:18 > 0:00:22Once again, the Total Wipeout course awaits ten intrepid celebrity lemmings.

0:00:22 > 0:00:26Nine will return to a normal celebrity life - whatever that is -

0:00:26 > 0:00:29but one will be crowned Total Wipeout champion,

0:00:29 > 0:00:33and walk away with £10,000 for the charity of their choice.

0:00:33 > 0:00:36Let the celebrity games begin.

0:00:39 > 0:00:42Welcome to the Total Wipeout Celebrity Special,

0:00:42 > 0:00:46which means we have a little bit of extra money to spend this week.

0:00:46 > 0:00:49We spent some on these curtains, some on the podium...

0:00:49 > 0:00:50You know what?

0:00:50 > 0:00:54We should have spent some of that money on the celebrities instead.

0:00:54 > 0:00:57Too late now. So, will the Total Wipeout course be made easier

0:00:57 > 0:00:59for our honoured celebrity guests?

0:00:59 > 0:01:01I'll give you a clue - the answer's no.

0:01:01 > 0:01:03Here's what the fairly famous faces face.

0:01:03 > 0:01:07The Qualifier - from the big time to the Big Balls.

0:01:07 > 0:01:10Crash Mountain - from high-life to pond life.

0:01:11 > 0:01:15Dizzy Dummies - from taking a spin in a limo to...just taking a spin.

0:01:15 > 0:01:20And finally, the Wipeout Zone - from after-show party to after-show ambulance ride.

0:01:20 > 0:01:23The rules today are a little different.

0:01:23 > 0:01:27All ten celebrities will compete on the Qualifier and Crash Mountain.

0:01:27 > 0:01:31That's twice the fun for us, twice the pain and humiliation for them.

0:01:31 > 0:01:36Let's meet the ten lucky celebrities who'll be risking everything in the name of charity.

0:01:36 > 0:01:40It's Really Wild presenter Michaela Strachan.

0:01:40 > 0:01:45Now, who's this? It's former EastEnders actor Joe Absolom.

0:01:45 > 0:01:48And wow! Weather presenting legend Sian Lloyd.

0:01:48 > 0:01:51Anthony Costa from boy band Blue.

0:01:52 > 0:01:54Comedienne Ninia Benjamin, nice.

0:01:56 > 0:01:58TV presenter Jeff Brazier.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03The first female winner of Big Brother, Kate...Llama.

0:02:03 > 0:02:05No, Lawler.

0:02:06 > 0:02:08It's TV chef, Tony Tobin.

0:02:08 > 0:02:10Excellent, double helpings today -

0:02:10 > 0:02:12it's another celebrity chef, Nancy Lam.

0:02:13 > 0:02:17And finally, Olympic 400 metre medallist Iwan Thomas.

0:02:20 > 0:02:23What a fine looking collection of individuals they are.

0:02:23 > 0:02:26My favourite one was the... third one.

0:02:26 > 0:02:28I love him...or her.

0:02:28 > 0:02:33But they are a fussy bunch. Anthony Costa demanded a bed in his room.

0:02:33 > 0:02:41Sian Lloyd wanted a roof over her head, and Joe Absolom wanted running water. Bunch of divas.

0:02:41 > 0:02:42Biscuits!

0:02:44 > 0:02:49Time to hand over to the biggest celebrity in the Total Wipeout stable - Amanda Byram.

0:02:54 > 0:02:56I'm joined now at the top of the Qualifier

0:02:56 > 0:03:00by Big Brother's first ever female winner, Kate Lawler.

0:03:00 > 0:03:02FAINT CHEERING

0:03:02 > 0:03:06What I really want to know, Kate - are you a winner today?

0:03:06 > 0:03:09I'm really not sure. Iwan Thomas is the most competitive person

0:03:09 > 0:03:12I've ever met in my entire life, and I'd kind of like to beat him

0:03:12 > 0:03:14just so I can see him cry on the aeroplane home.

0:03:14 > 0:03:17- Get out there and do us girls proud. - I will do.

0:03:17 > 0:03:20This is for all the blondes. Wish me luck.

0:03:20 > 0:03:23- OK, good luck.- Good luck.

0:03:23 > 0:03:26So, tabloid favourite and former Big Brother winner Kate Lawler

0:03:26 > 0:03:28kick-starts today's qualifier.

0:03:28 > 0:03:31She's about to go where no celebrity has gone before.

0:03:33 > 0:03:35It's Celebrity Traplonk.

0:03:35 > 0:03:39A diving board, a trapeze and some mud.

0:03:39 > 0:03:44Followed by a diving board, a trapeze...and some more mud.

0:03:44 > 0:03:47Now, Kate has to do this as quickly as she can.

0:03:47 > 0:03:51The fastest time on the qualifier will score ten points,

0:03:51 > 0:03:55the slowest, a measly one. Here we go, she jumps,

0:03:55 > 0:03:57- grabs, and she's across.- Good girl.

0:03:57 > 0:04:00And... Oh.

0:04:00 > 0:04:02What's Amanda doing? Is it a book?

0:04:02 > 0:04:06A film? I don't know. Oh, it's how much Kate missed the trapeze by.

0:04:06 > 0:04:08Yeah, more than that.

0:04:08 > 0:04:11Next, it's Celebrity Sucker Punch.

0:04:11 > 0:04:15Kate survived 12 weeks of conflict in the Big Brother house,

0:04:15 > 0:04:16so this should be a walk in the park.

0:04:16 > 0:04:20Will she be Lawler the brawler, or Lawler the faller?

0:04:22 > 0:04:24It's faller.

0:04:24 > 0:04:25- Oh, my God!- A little bit muddy.

0:04:25 > 0:04:28You're not wrong there, Amanda.

0:04:28 > 0:04:31Even her celebrity eyeballs got muddy, look.

0:04:31 > 0:04:33- Oh my...- Are you all right?

0:04:33 > 0:04:37- Do I look all right?- Yeah, you look fabulous, darling, fabulous.

0:04:37 > 0:04:41Next, Kate has to face the Big Balls. What could possibly go wrong?

0:04:41 > 0:04:45Apart from that, and that, and that could happen...

0:04:45 > 0:04:47And that. All of those things.

0:04:47 > 0:04:52Remember, if Kate takes too long to jump she'll get some motivation from

0:04:52 > 0:04:56that massive foam mallet, so she'd better hurry up.

0:04:56 > 0:04:58Here we go. She's on the first ball.

0:04:58 > 0:05:02No celebrity has ever crossed the Big Balls.

0:05:02 > 0:05:05Can Kate Lawler be the first?

0:05:07 > 0:05:08No, she can't.

0:05:13 > 0:05:16While Kate takes a gentle paddle,

0:05:16 > 0:05:19here's a peek at today's final obstacle.

0:05:19 > 0:05:22It would be easy if they were ordinary Cradles of Doom,

0:05:22 > 0:05:23but these are...

0:05:23 > 0:05:27The Celebrity Cradles of Doom!

0:05:28 > 0:05:31Actually, they're exactly the same.

0:05:31 > 0:05:34Right, Kate is cold, wet and probably fed up.

0:05:34 > 0:05:35This should be fun - for us.

0:05:38 > 0:05:39She's up.

0:05:41 > 0:05:42On to the first cradle.

0:05:42 > 0:05:46Can she get the timing right, or will she rush it?

0:05:47 > 0:05:51Oh, great stuff. Just one more leap to go.

0:05:51 > 0:05:53- Come on, Kate.- Yes.

0:05:55 > 0:05:58And Kate Lawler is the first celeb to cross the course

0:05:58 > 0:06:00with an impressive time of 2:35.

0:06:01 > 0:06:04I didn't mind the swingy bit, I got over the first one...

0:06:04 > 0:06:05FROG CROAKS

0:06:05 > 0:06:07- What's that noise?- A frog.

0:06:07 > 0:06:10Eurgh, there's a frog here.

0:06:15 > 0:06:20Next up is celebrity chef Tony Tobin from Ready Steady Cook

0:06:20 > 0:06:22and Saturday Kitchen.

0:06:22 > 0:06:26So, Tony, are you going to be cooking up a storm out there today?

0:06:26 > 0:06:27This could be one of my best recipes.

0:06:27 > 0:06:30Well, go get yourself out there and chop up the course

0:06:30 > 0:06:33and steam it and do whatever else you chefs do.

0:06:34 > 0:06:37I never get pudding. If Byram gets pudding on set,

0:06:37 > 0:06:40I demand to get pudding as well or I'm walking.

0:06:40 > 0:06:43And I've watched both of those shows he does. I think.

0:06:43 > 0:06:47Where was I? Oh, yeah, Tony Tobin has set off, sprinting across the

0:06:47 > 0:06:51pontoons and flying towards those Celebrity Traplonks.

0:06:51 > 0:06:53Come on, Tony.

0:06:53 > 0:06:56Yes, yes, here he goes.

0:06:56 > 0:07:00Like a true chef, making a meal out of this.

0:07:00 > 0:07:02- HE CHUCKLES - Making a meal! He's over, though.

0:07:02 > 0:07:05To be a good chef you need fast hands and perfect timing,

0:07:05 > 0:07:08so Tony should be pretty...

0:07:11 > 0:07:13Lines up the run,

0:07:13 > 0:07:19jumps, grabs thin air, and into the Argentinian mud jus.

0:07:20 > 0:07:24Now, to all those eggs that Tony's beaten over the years,

0:07:24 > 0:07:26it's finally payback time.

0:07:28 > 0:07:32Tony doing well, it looks like those eggs might end up disappointed.

0:07:32 > 0:07:36Nothing worse than that disappointed egg. What am I talking about? Oh!

0:07:36 > 0:07:39Tony getting a thorough basting in the mud there.

0:07:43 > 0:07:46So, how will the Ready Steady Cook veteran fair on the Big Balls?

0:07:46 > 0:07:48How far will he get?

0:07:48 > 0:07:54Will it be green pepper or red tomato? My money's on red tomato.

0:07:54 > 0:07:56Come on, Tony.

0:08:00 > 0:08:01Yes, red tomato.

0:08:01 > 0:08:04Did you hear me? I said red tomato.

0:08:04 > 0:08:08Tony? Oh, there he is. I thought he was stuck in the...

0:08:08 > 0:08:10yeah.

0:08:10 > 0:08:12Just the Cradles of Doom left now then Tony and Amanda

0:08:12 > 0:08:13can have their dessert.

0:08:13 > 0:08:17Safely on to the first. Speaking of dessert, where's mine?

0:08:17 > 0:08:20Come on, Tony, that's it, yes!

0:08:20 > 0:08:22He's gone for the second and he's made it.

0:08:22 > 0:08:26One big jump to go - if Tony makes this jump he'll be the first

0:08:26 > 0:08:29celebrity chef from Reigate ever to cross the Celebrity...

0:08:29 > 0:08:32Oh, my pudding's arrived, fantastic.

0:08:32 > 0:08:34I don't like jelly, have you got anything else?

0:08:36 > 0:08:37Thank you.

0:08:40 > 0:08:43And Tony finishes in 3:15.

0:08:43 > 0:08:45Yes!

0:08:47 > 0:08:53Now it's the turn of comedienne and star of Three Non-Blondes, Ninia Benjamin.

0:08:53 > 0:08:55And here are my muscles!

0:08:55 > 0:08:57But don't look at that bit.

0:08:57 > 0:08:59People are going to be shocked and in awe.

0:08:59 > 0:09:02I'm going to swing, I'm going to climb, I'm going to be so fit

0:09:02 > 0:09:06they're going to go, "Let's get her for the next Bond girl."

0:09:06 > 0:09:08OK, where is she?

0:09:08 > 0:09:10Where's she gone? There she is.

0:09:10 > 0:09:16Now, the perfect platform for Ninia to demonstrate the style and attitude of a true Bond girl.

0:09:17 > 0:09:19KLAXON BLARES

0:09:19 > 0:09:23- Here we go!- The klaxon means go.

0:09:25 > 0:09:28Yeah, I'm getting attitude.

0:09:28 > 0:09:32I can see style. Now, for that Halle Berry moment.

0:09:32 > 0:09:34I don't hold out much hope for the poor thing.

0:09:36 > 0:09:38Any minute now. Here she goes.

0:09:38 > 0:09:41SHE SHRIEKS

0:09:41 > 0:09:44Is that a seagull? No, that is actually her.

0:09:44 > 0:09:47Maybe she needs time to get into the role.

0:09:47 > 0:09:52It's going to be a long day, people, a long day.

0:09:52 > 0:09:54In the meantime, maybe boy band heart-throb

0:09:54 > 0:09:58Anthony Costa from Blue can get across the course a bit quicker.

0:09:58 > 0:10:02I may be the boy from Blue, but I'll certainly "All Rise" to the occasion.

0:10:02 > 0:10:05I'm sure he changed a tyre for me once. Right, here goes Anthony.

0:10:05 > 0:10:07Oops.

0:10:07 > 0:10:10Either he sat on a gerbil or he picked up an injury -

0:10:10 > 0:10:12let's hope that's not too serious.

0:10:12 > 0:10:14No, he's OK, I think.

0:10:14 > 0:10:17Climbing out on to the pontoons.

0:10:17 > 0:10:20Oh, looking a bit unsteady.

0:10:21 > 0:10:23Not stumbling any more, though, he's got his sea legs,

0:10:23 > 0:10:25let's find out if he brought his circus legs.

0:10:27 > 0:10:29OK, he's on to the Traplonk.

0:10:29 > 0:10:33First of all, jump trapeze, forwards, yes!

0:10:33 > 0:10:37No, backwards, oh, forwards... backwards again...

0:10:37 > 0:10:40If you've got a poster of him on your wall, girls, don't look.

0:10:40 > 0:10:42Oh, dear, he's off.

0:10:42 > 0:10:44- Come on, Anthony. - Yeah, come on, Anthony.

0:10:44 > 0:10:46Now he's got a feel for this

0:10:46 > 0:10:49I expect he'll do a lot better second time around.

0:10:52 > 0:10:54No, I was wrong there. Quite badly wrong.

0:10:54 > 0:10:57- That's going to Costa him. - Amanda Byram, there.

0:10:57 > 0:11:01She writes all her own material, you know - in crayon.

0:11:02 > 0:11:05Anthony might be used to the waving, outstretched arms

0:11:05 > 0:11:09of Blue fans, but this represents an entirely different challenge.

0:11:12 > 0:11:16# It's sad, so sad

0:11:16 > 0:11:19# It's a sad, sad situation

0:11:19 > 0:11:22# And it's getting more and more absurd... #

0:11:22 > 0:11:26Certainly is, as a muddy and singed Anthony prepares to take on

0:11:26 > 0:11:28Argentina's most famous four piece.

0:11:28 > 0:11:31It's blue versus red.

0:11:34 > 0:11:36And red wins.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40He is looking tired, we may have broken him.

0:11:40 > 0:11:43Underwater no one can hear you sing.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48Just the Cradles of Doom to go.

0:11:48 > 0:11:50So far today, everybody's made it across,

0:11:50 > 0:11:55so can Anthony Costa be the first today not to make it?

0:11:56 > 0:11:59He's on to the first, halfway there.

0:12:03 > 0:12:09Oh, a little snatch of one of those famous Blue dance routines, I think.

0:12:09 > 0:12:13- He doesn't look happy at all, does he? Look.- You can do it.

0:12:13 > 0:12:15Don't jinx it for him, Amanda.

0:12:17 > 0:12:20Oh, she jinxed it, that was Amanda's fault.

0:12:20 > 0:12:23She did that. The celebrity Cradles of Doom are all about

0:12:23 > 0:12:28timing and I think Anthony might have missed that memo about timing.

0:12:28 > 0:12:31Not the quickest time overall, but I'm sure Anthony will make

0:12:31 > 0:12:36up for it with a rendition of one of those musical ditties that got him to the top of the hit parade.

0:12:36 > 0:12:40- HE SNORTS - I don't know that one - was that one of theirs?

0:12:40 > 0:12:42Time to rejoin budding Bond girl Ninia

0:12:42 > 0:12:46as she emerges effortlessly from the water.

0:12:46 > 0:12:47SHE CACKLES

0:12:50 > 0:12:52Muchas gracias!

0:12:52 > 0:12:54After that little setback,

0:12:54 > 0:12:59it's time for Ninia to show us her licence to thrill.

0:12:59 > 0:13:02That's not technically an obstacle.

0:13:02 > 0:13:07This truly is a sterling effort from Ninia. What determination,

0:13:07 > 0:13:10what conviction, what spirit.

0:13:10 > 0:13:14Unfortunately, however, Ninia is being a tiny bit on the slow side,

0:13:14 > 0:13:16and to prevent us from over-running,

0:13:16 > 0:13:20I'm going to give the fast-forward button a bit of a nudge.

0:13:20 > 0:13:22Ah, that's better.

0:13:24 > 0:13:26Making progress.

0:13:27 > 0:13:29Why are we all laughing?

0:13:29 > 0:13:31I don't know.

0:13:33 > 0:13:35Well, she may have avoided the Traplonks,

0:13:35 > 0:13:38but she won't be able to avoid the Sucker Punch.

0:13:41 > 0:13:47Oh, that was in the face, below-the-belt. Oh, ow.

0:13:49 > 0:13:50Yeah, that was...

0:13:50 > 0:13:52tummy, knee, arm, head.

0:13:52 > 0:13:54Just everywhere.

0:13:54 > 0:13:56Oh, so close!

0:13:56 > 0:13:59Not really. It was always miles out.

0:13:59 > 0:14:01Poor Ninia took a bit of a battering there.

0:14:01 > 0:14:04Is there anywhere she didn't actually get hit?

0:14:04 > 0:14:05I think the answer is...

0:14:07 > 0:14:11The Big Balls, now. Ninia has a time so far of five minutes 15 seconds.

0:14:11 > 0:14:15She bottled the Traplonk. She's doomed but will she bottle it here?

0:14:17 > 0:14:19No, this is brave stuff.

0:14:19 > 0:14:21She's on to the first one. Hang on in there, Ninia.

0:14:21 > 0:14:23Now, don't rush this.

0:14:23 > 0:14:26Take your time.

0:14:26 > 0:14:29You've got all the time in the world.

0:14:29 > 0:14:33MUSIC: "We Have All The Time In The World" by Louis Armstrong

0:14:49 > 0:14:51That was a bit more time than I was expecting.

0:14:51 > 0:14:55You're going to need to move, Ninia. Yeah, she moved, she moved.

0:14:55 > 0:14:58I'm going to come back to Ninia.

0:14:58 > 0:15:00Here's someone who should fare better.

0:15:00 > 0:15:03I don't want to big him up too much, but he is a former World,

0:15:03 > 0:15:07European and Commonwealth Champion and Olympic silver medallist.

0:15:07 > 0:15:10It's Iwan Thomas.

0:15:10 > 0:15:14I've taken on the best, now it's time to take on these big red balls.

0:15:14 > 0:15:16- Come on! - Get ready for something special.

0:15:16 > 0:15:19He's just going to leap over this.

0:15:19 > 0:15:21- Oh!- Come on, speedy boy.

0:15:21 > 0:15:24Not the catchiest of nicknames, Amanda, but I'll go with it.

0:15:24 > 0:15:28Speedy Boy Iwan clearly means business.

0:15:28 > 0:15:30The Traplonks first.

0:15:30 > 0:15:34Oh, and sailing over the first Traplonk.

0:15:34 > 0:15:36Woah, not the second, though.

0:15:38 > 0:15:43Iwan going for a high-jump record there, didn't quite pull it off, probably because he is a sprinter.

0:15:43 > 0:15:48He holds the British record for fastest time in the 4x400m relay,

0:15:48 > 0:15:50but can he outbox the Sucker Punch?

0:15:50 > 0:15:56No. Because he's a sprinter.

0:15:56 > 0:15:58Finally, time for some sprinting.

0:15:58 > 0:16:01It's there 4x1 Big Ball relay.

0:16:01 > 0:16:031, 2, 3, wow!

0:16:05 > 0:16:10- I'm speechless!- Fearless Iwan flies across all four balls.

0:16:10 > 0:16:11That was spectacular.

0:16:18 > 0:16:21The final leg of Iwan's Qualifier approaches.

0:16:21 > 0:16:24It's the Cradles of Doom.

0:16:24 > 0:16:27And this is looking like a very fast time.

0:16:27 > 0:16:31He's up. He's off.

0:16:31 > 0:16:32He's across.

0:16:32 > 0:16:35And he's completely mucked it up.

0:16:35 > 0:16:41Iwan going for a long jump record there, didn't quite pull it off because, yeah, he's a sprinter.

0:16:41 > 0:16:44So, the athletics legend skips up to the finishing podium

0:16:44 > 0:16:46in a time of 1 minute 35.

0:16:46 > 0:16:48That is going to take some beating.

0:16:52 > 0:16:54That is pure guts.

0:16:54 > 0:16:57The 400's guts as well if you go hard, but that run today,

0:16:57 > 0:17:02the Wipeout course, you can't have any fear, don't hesitate.

0:17:02 > 0:17:05Think about things, then make your mind up and go for it.

0:17:05 > 0:17:09Ninia here, now on a time of nine and a half minutes.

0:17:09 > 0:17:13Pushing the boundaries of epic. At least she's still smiling.

0:17:13 > 0:17:15I'm so tired!

0:17:15 > 0:17:17Come on, Ninia.

0:17:17 > 0:17:19Come on.

0:17:23 > 0:17:25I think that smile's ebbed slightly.

0:17:25 > 0:17:29She's on the first one, looking good... ish.

0:17:31 > 0:17:33I don't like it!

0:17:33 > 0:17:37- You're not supposed to! Come on, Ninia, get to your feet.- I can't!

0:17:37 > 0:17:41Stand up on the one you're on.

0:17:45 > 0:17:47Oh, Ninia!

0:17:47 > 0:17:50Now I've got a problem, I've only been given 11 minutes worth

0:17:50 > 0:17:55of commentary and I've literally run out of words, so, I don't know, let's just sit back and watch.

0:17:55 > 0:17:57This is new territory.

0:17:57 > 0:18:00OK, straight ahead of you, that way, the other way,

0:18:00 > 0:18:02the other way, that way.

0:18:05 > 0:18:09I don't want to go up! I don't want to do it.

0:18:10 > 0:18:13I don't want to go up!

0:18:13 > 0:18:17- You're so close. - Do I have to go up?- Yes, you do!

0:18:25 > 0:18:28- Woo-hoo!- Do I have to stand up?

0:18:28 > 0:18:33Ninia's run will go down in Celebrity Total Wipeout history.

0:18:33 > 0:18:3611 minutes 11 seconds. Wow.

0:18:36 > 0:18:40So, let's have a look at the leaderboard. Iwan Thomas has sprinted

0:18:40 > 0:18:44into gold medal position, while Kate "The Faller" Lawler lies in silver.

0:18:44 > 0:18:51Tony Tobin is in third, in fourth place is Anthony Costa, and epic Ninia is currently in last place.

0:18:51 > 0:18:55But there are still more celebrities to come, so this could all change.

0:18:55 > 0:18:57Though not the last place, probably.

0:18:57 > 0:19:02Now, remember, the slowest to cross the Qualifier will get just one measly point.

0:19:02 > 0:19:04The fastest will get ten.

0:19:04 > 0:19:08Who will it be? If I were to say the name Nancy Lam...

0:19:08 > 0:19:11what would you say?

0:19:11 > 0:19:15Yes, well she's not just a famous... what is she?

0:19:15 > 0:19:18Chef. I reckon she could be today's dark horse.

0:19:18 > 0:19:24I eat prawns like eating lovely sweet,

0:19:24 > 0:19:28but I'm going to try to show you

0:19:28 > 0:19:32those big things, those big red things and go...

0:19:34 > 0:19:36I can't wait to see her in action.

0:19:36 > 0:19:38I'm scared! Who's next?

0:19:38 > 0:19:43Wow! Weather presenting legend, Sian Lloyd.

0:19:43 > 0:19:49I'm forecasting high pressure in charge, glorious blue skies, wall-to-wall sunshine,

0:19:49 > 0:19:55but later on, maybe deep depression moving in, leading to more unsettled conditions.

0:19:55 > 0:20:00That's exactly why you're the best weather presenter in the world. That was brilliant.

0:20:01 > 0:20:04And she's off.

0:20:04 > 0:20:08Yes, little nod to the camera there. Presenter skills coming to the fore.

0:20:08 > 0:20:10Always the consummate professional.

0:20:10 > 0:20:12First Traplonk now. Oh, dear. That was...

0:20:14 > 0:20:16Still, she kept her composure.

0:20:16 > 0:20:19Bravo! Exquisite. Very ladylike.

0:20:21 > 0:20:24Right, the Sucker Punch next.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26Come on, Sian.

0:20:26 > 0:20:28This wall punches back.

0:20:28 > 0:20:29Aargh!

0:20:30 > 0:20:33The voice that soothes millions every evening.

0:20:33 > 0:20:38First few cracks starting to show maybe in that presenter veneer?

0:20:38 > 0:20:40Aargh! Aargh! Aargh!

0:20:41 > 0:20:44Yeah.

0:20:44 > 0:20:47Sian Lloyd's been at the top of her game for 25 years.

0:20:47 > 0:20:50She's demonstrating here how important it is

0:20:50 > 0:20:53to always look her best, regardless of the situation.

0:20:53 > 0:20:57She combines that with the skill of always keeping calm under pressure.

0:20:59 > 0:21:01Aargh!

0:21:01 > 0:21:02See?

0:21:05 > 0:21:07I forecast a weather presenter

0:21:07 > 0:21:11heading south with high pressure as wet conditions are moving in.

0:21:14 > 0:21:18Sian was voted UK Rear Of The Year in 2007.

0:21:18 > 0:21:21Can she eclipse this achievement by adding the title

0:21:21 > 0:21:23of Celebrity Cradles of Doom Crosser?

0:21:23 > 0:21:26- I can't do this!- Yes you can!

0:21:26 > 0:21:27- Yes you can.- I so can't!

0:21:27 > 0:21:30- Come on, Sian. - I'm so scared of this.

0:21:32 > 0:21:34Overcome that fear. Master it.

0:21:34 > 0:21:36Yes! Oh, look at this.

0:21:36 > 0:21:38This is moving stuff.

0:21:38 > 0:21:41Sian Lloyd overcoming her greatest fears,

0:21:41 > 0:21:44tapping into her last reserves of strength.

0:21:44 > 0:21:45Refusing to be overcome.

0:21:48 > 0:21:49Oh.

0:21:53 > 0:21:55Despite a moment of weakness on the cradles,

0:21:55 > 0:21:58Sian Lloyd regains her composure to complete the Qualifier

0:21:58 > 0:22:00in six minutes and 11 seconds.

0:22:00 > 0:22:02Wahey!

0:22:04 > 0:22:06I am zonked!

0:22:06 > 0:22:10- There was zonking?- I am zonked! - I didn't see any zonking.

0:22:10 > 0:22:14Anyway, next is TV presenter and former professional footballer, Jeff Brazier.

0:22:14 > 0:22:17You've seen the rest, now witness the best!

0:22:17 > 0:22:19He's on after me.

0:22:19 > 0:22:22Tell me, what do the kids think of Daddy being here?

0:22:22 > 0:22:27It's their favourite programme. They've been talking to me about tactics and what we're going to do

0:22:27 > 0:22:30on the red balls and maybe that will help me to get a good time.

0:22:33 > 0:22:36Jeff says he wants to break the record time for the Qualifier.

0:22:36 > 0:22:38That's 1:08, by the way.

0:22:38 > 0:22:41I'd say there's a fair chance he'll break something tonight.

0:22:41 > 0:22:42In fact, I'm almost certain.

0:22:42 > 0:22:47- Traplonks time. Jeff judges the first one perfectly.- Yes!

0:22:49 > 0:22:51Oh, and misjudges the second one perfectly!

0:22:53 > 0:22:56Just look at Jeff Brazier, giving 100% here.

0:22:56 > 0:22:58Leaving nothing in the changing rooms.

0:22:58 > 0:23:01Apart from his bag, maybe. Change of clothes, watch,

0:23:01 > 0:23:04- but it's all locked up in a safe. - Come on, Jeff!

0:23:04 > 0:23:06# Flash, aah-aah! #

0:23:06 > 0:23:08The Sucker Punch now, and wow!

0:23:08 > 0:23:10I've never seen that before!

0:23:10 > 0:23:13That must be a Total Wipeout first.

0:23:13 > 0:23:18If he can do that on the Sucker Punch, what can he do here?

0:23:20 > 0:23:23It's a good effort. It's a good effort.

0:23:23 > 0:23:27Jeff Brazier may not beat the course record, but he's having a very good go at it.

0:23:30 > 0:23:32# Gordon's alive! #

0:23:32 > 0:23:34Who's Gordon? Where does he come in?

0:23:34 > 0:23:36# Flash, aah-aah! #

0:23:36 > 0:23:40Just the Cradles of Doom to go now for Gordon Brazier.

0:23:40 > 0:23:43If he makes these, he'll beat Iwan Thomas's time.

0:23:43 > 0:23:46He's up the ladder.

0:23:46 > 0:23:50He's going for it. Come on! Come on!

0:23:50 > 0:23:55Ooh! He really went straight for it!

0:23:55 > 0:23:58Mmm. No records broken.

0:23:58 > 0:24:01Possibly just his nose.

0:24:01 > 0:24:02And some teeth.

0:24:02 > 0:24:06And our podium. Still, despite that howler,

0:24:06 > 0:24:08Jeff "Gordon" Brazier completes the Qualifier

0:24:08 > 0:24:10in one minute and 44 seconds,

0:24:10 > 0:24:13only nine seconds shy of Iwan Thomas.

0:24:13 > 0:24:19So far, the Qualifier has terrified the celebrities.

0:24:19 > 0:24:25So what's really needed now is somebody who is completely fearless.

0:24:25 > 0:24:30- Brilliant. It's Really Wild presenter, Michaela Strachan.- Rah!

0:24:30 > 0:24:32I've swam with sharks,

0:24:32 > 0:24:35I've been charged by an elephant, been charged by a rhino.

0:24:35 > 0:24:38So, you know, how difficult can it be?

0:24:38 > 0:24:42I was once bothered by a baboon, but that's a whole different story.

0:24:42 > 0:24:45Michaela Strachan is a wildlife lover and hater of pollution.

0:24:45 > 0:24:48So probably best not to tell her

0:24:48 > 0:24:52this is where the Argentineans store their toxic waste.

0:24:52 > 0:24:55Yes, she definitely doesn't want to fall in there.

0:24:55 > 0:24:57Oh, she's, er, she's fallen in.

0:24:57 > 0:25:02That toxic sludge is emitting 1,000 millisieverts of radiation.

0:25:02 > 0:25:04She's not going to be happy with that.

0:25:06 > 0:25:08Michaela lives in Cape Town

0:25:08 > 0:25:12and looks out of the window every morning to see lions, bison...

0:25:12 > 0:25:15polar bears... and hopefully not that baboon I mentioned.

0:25:15 > 0:25:17That was horrible. Oh.

0:25:17 > 0:25:21Oh! You'd better get out of that stuff pretty quickly as well.

0:25:21 > 0:25:26It burns after a while. Sucker Punch really dishing it out there to Michaela.

0:25:27 > 0:25:29Michaela claims to be fearless.

0:25:29 > 0:25:32Let's find out how well that claim holds up here.

0:25:32 > 0:25:35Now. Can she... oh, she's off!

0:25:36 > 0:25:41She really wants to be careful in that water, the Argentineans use it to strip paint...

0:25:41 > 0:25:44off farm machines. It's true!

0:25:44 > 0:25:49Michaela surprisingly intact as she approaches the Cradles of Doom.

0:25:49 > 0:25:54Ooh, she's onto the first. Come on, Michaela.

0:25:54 > 0:25:57She's up and making a move onto the second.

0:25:57 > 0:25:58One leap to go before

0:25:58 > 0:26:02she can climb into that on-site decontamination chamber.

0:26:02 > 0:26:05- She'll probably make it.- Yes! - Michaela's made it in a very good

0:26:05 > 0:26:07two minutes and 11 seconds.

0:26:07 > 0:26:10Thankfully not suffering any ill side-effects... yet.

0:26:10 > 0:26:11What happened?

0:26:11 > 0:26:16- Urgh!- Oh, dear! That's what I did when the baboon got me.

0:26:16 > 0:26:22Now, get ready to be astounded and have your preconceptions shattered.

0:26:22 > 0:26:24Because Nancy Lam is...

0:26:25 > 0:26:28Oh. Hang on. Yes.

0:26:28 > 0:26:32I've just been told Nancy is retiring from the competition.

0:26:32 > 0:26:34Problems with her blood pressure?

0:26:34 > 0:26:37That's disappointing and a bit of an anti-climax.

0:26:37 > 0:26:39I kind of wish I hadn't bigged her up so much now.

0:26:39 > 0:26:43Or bet my car on her making the Wipeout Zone.

0:26:43 > 0:26:46I'm joined now at the top of the Qualifier by thespian, Joe Absolom.

0:26:46 > 0:26:50- Joe, how are you doing?- Very good. Feeling really excited by this.

0:26:50 > 0:26:54- The mud's probably going to be a bit difficult.- Why?

0:26:54 > 0:26:56Because it's muddy.

0:26:56 > 0:27:00This course may be silly, but not as silly as these bad boys.

0:27:01 > 0:27:03Yes, they are quite silly. Yep.

0:27:03 > 0:27:07- Pretty good start from the former EastEnders actor.- Nice, Joe!

0:27:07 > 0:27:11Onto the pontoons. Joe's appearing on Total Wipeout

0:27:11 > 0:27:15to prove to his three-year-old daughter that he can do it.

0:27:15 > 0:27:18And from the looks of it, yes, he can!

0:27:18 > 0:27:19No, he can't.

0:27:19 > 0:27:22Sorry. Joe provided some comedy there.

0:27:22 > 0:27:24Real acting talent.

0:27:24 > 0:27:28Showing us his versatility as a thespian.

0:27:28 > 0:27:30Joe has often been cast in the role of hard man,

0:27:30 > 0:27:32but so has the Sucker Punch,

0:27:32 > 0:27:36so this should make for some interesting dialogue on set.

0:27:36 > 0:27:38Ah-ha! Yes. Straight in.

0:27:38 > 0:27:43Sucker Punch steals the scene again. Never mind. Big Balls now.

0:27:43 > 0:27:45The stage of many a dramatic encounter.

0:27:47 > 0:27:51Here we go. Ooh. Ooh. Oh!

0:27:54 > 0:27:58Uncanny resemblance to his action scene in Casualty... or The Bill.

0:27:58 > 0:28:01Holby City, Last of the Summer Wine. One of those.

0:28:01 > 0:28:05Joe says he's never won anything, but if he makes it over these

0:28:05 > 0:28:09without a fall, he may well have the winning time today.

0:28:09 > 0:28:11Come on, Joe. This is it.

0:28:11 > 0:28:15Onto the first. Whoa! Yes! Almost falls, but he's recovered.

0:28:15 > 0:28:19This is very quick. One more jump. Wow! He's made it.

0:28:19 > 0:28:22Joe, you are a champion!

0:28:22 > 0:28:25Now, cheer up, please!

0:28:25 > 0:28:30That incredible performance puts Joe at the top of the leaderboard and wins him the maximum ten points.

0:28:30 > 0:28:32Iwan Thomas in second with nine.

0:28:32 > 0:28:36Jeff "Gordon" Brazier still pretty "Flash" in third. Michaela Strachan in fourth.

0:28:36 > 0:28:39Kate Lawler in fifth. Tony Tobin in sixth.

0:28:39 > 0:28:41Antony Costa in seventh.

0:28:41 > 0:28:44In the danger zone are Sian Lloyd with three points,

0:28:44 > 0:28:49Ninia on two and somehow Nancy has one point for not even starting.

0:28:49 > 0:28:53Work that out. But remember, no-one gets eliminated yet.

0:28:53 > 0:28:57Everyone has a chance to claw back some dignity in the next round.

0:28:57 > 0:29:01That's right. It's Crash Mountain. Which is dripping dignity.

0:29:01 > 0:29:04Well, it's dripping something. I think it's hydraulic fluid.

0:29:04 > 0:29:06Ha! It's going to catch fire!

0:29:12 > 0:29:15The celebrities must all dash to the centre podium,

0:29:15 > 0:29:17avoiding that high-speed sweeper arm.

0:29:17 > 0:29:20The first across will be awarded a full ten points.

0:29:20 > 0:29:23The second will score nine, and so on.

0:29:23 > 0:29:27At the end, the points are combined with those from the Qualifier

0:29:27 > 0:29:31and the five highest-scoring contestants will go through to the next round. Got that?

0:29:31 > 0:29:34Good. Let's meet the lucky ten.

0:29:34 > 0:29:36On podium one, it's Nancy Lam.

0:29:36 > 0:29:40Well, it would be Nancy Lam but she's on the "did not start" bench.

0:29:40 > 0:29:43On two and three, Antony Costa...

0:29:43 > 0:29:47I may be the boy from Blue, but boys, I'm coming after you! Woo!

0:29:47 > 0:29:49..And Kate Lawler.

0:29:49 > 0:29:52I'm so excited to be here. Can you see it on my face?

0:29:52 > 0:29:56That girl's got range. On four and five, Tony Tobin...

0:29:56 > 0:29:58Is this my best side, yeah?

0:29:58 > 0:30:00No. And Jeff Gordon Brazier.

0:30:00 > 0:30:02I don't want to swim any more.

0:30:02 > 0:30:06You probably will have to. On six and seven, it's Sian Lloyd...

0:30:06 > 0:30:08This looks pretty stormy to me.

0:30:08 > 0:30:12I'm forecasting unsettled conditions ahead.

0:30:12 > 0:30:14How does she do that? And Ninia Benjamin.

0:30:14 > 0:30:18I may have come last on the thing but on this thing,

0:30:18 > 0:30:21I'm going to come second to last.

0:30:21 > 0:30:24All right! On eight and nine it's...Joe Absolom!

0:30:24 > 0:30:27This arm may be going around but it's not going to take me down.

0:30:27 > 0:30:28..And Iwan Thomas.

0:30:28 > 0:30:33I may have been beaten by the balls, but let's hope this doesn't leave me deflated.

0:30:33 > 0:30:36And finally on podium 10, it's Michaela Strachan.

0:30:36 > 0:30:40I'm going to try and skip across this like a mountain goat.

0:30:40 > 0:30:42That's the plan, anyway. GOAT BLEATS

0:30:46 > 0:30:49All of our celebrities have climbed the slippery slope to success

0:30:49 > 0:30:53and now they're about to come crashing down. It's Crash Mountain.

0:30:53 > 0:30:56- Are you all already? - Yes!- No.

0:30:56 > 0:30:58Ah! Oh, celebrities!

0:30:58 > 0:31:02They're always ready for action. 3, 2, 1...

0:31:02 > 0:31:04KLAXON SOUNDS

0:31:04 > 0:31:07So, Crash Mountain begins.

0:31:09 > 0:31:10- No way.- Well, come on.

0:31:10 > 0:31:11No way. I ain't going.

0:31:11 > 0:31:15No way.

0:31:15 > 0:31:17Not exactly oozing enthusiasm, are they?

0:31:19 > 0:31:22Maybe they're waiting for their agents to tell them to go?

0:31:22 > 0:31:24When do we go?

0:31:24 > 0:31:27Now! Oh great, Tony's off and in the water.

0:31:27 > 0:31:29That's not going to have inspired them to try,

0:31:29 > 0:31:32but at least he did try. Come on, celebrities!

0:31:32 > 0:31:35You're a disgrace to show business, or whatever you variously do.

0:31:35 > 0:31:37Iwan goes for it. So close!

0:31:37 > 0:31:38Ohh!

0:31:38 > 0:31:40- My heart's beating. - My heart is as well.

0:31:43 > 0:31:45Ninia goes for it.

0:31:45 > 0:31:46Oh, no!

0:31:46 > 0:31:52They do say comedy is all about timing and that was perfect.

0:31:52 > 0:31:53Who'll be next?

0:31:54 > 0:31:56It's Jeff. Good landing.

0:31:56 > 0:31:58Oh, quality ducking action.

0:31:58 > 0:32:01- Come on, Jeff.- Come on, Jeff!

0:32:01 > 0:32:02- Get up and run!- Yes, come on.

0:32:04 > 0:32:05Oh, what was that?

0:32:05 > 0:32:08He just chickened out.

0:32:08 > 0:32:10Here's Joe! No.

0:32:10 > 0:32:11That was the best attempt yet.

0:32:11 > 0:32:14He touched the summit... with his face.

0:32:14 > 0:32:17This is impossible!

0:32:18 > 0:32:22- I can't do it!- It's not impossible for normal humans, Kate.

0:32:22 > 0:32:24But maybe for celebrities, is a mission impossible.

0:32:24 > 0:32:27Mind you, here comes Iwan, and Michaela's off.

0:32:27 > 0:32:29- Come on!- Yes!

0:32:29 > 0:32:32Iwan Thomas is the first to the centre.

0:32:32 > 0:32:34- Anything is possible! - He gets ten points.

0:32:34 > 0:32:38Right, who's next, as Iwan rallies the troops?

0:32:39 > 0:32:41- IWAN SHOUTS - There's a motivational speech.

0:32:41 > 0:32:44Come on. Oh, Antony! Straight into the water.

0:32:46 > 0:32:49- Argh!- That's the catchy follow-up to his PRRFFFT song.

0:32:49 > 0:32:51Now available to download.

0:32:53 > 0:32:59Kate now and she's in very quickly.

0:32:59 > 0:33:03Ninia again. Ow! That's cruel.

0:33:03 > 0:33:06- Michaela's on. - Stay down! Get up and run.

0:33:06 > 0:33:08Come on! Come on!

0:33:08 > 0:33:10Oh, no, she's off.

0:33:10 > 0:33:12Jeff again.

0:33:15 > 0:33:18- Oh. Well, that's original and ineffective.- Oh!

0:33:18 > 0:33:21There is something you don't see every day. Entertaining though.

0:33:23 > 0:33:25Well, oh!

0:33:25 > 0:33:27He'll get gigs of the strength of that.

0:33:27 > 0:33:30Tony's back for seconds... of nasty water.

0:33:30 > 0:33:32Joe now.

0:33:32 > 0:33:34No! Just misses out again.

0:33:34 > 0:33:36We're going to do it, come on.

0:33:36 > 0:33:38Kate's on. Properly now.

0:33:38 > 0:33:39Oww!

0:33:39 > 0:33:42Oh dear!

0:33:42 > 0:33:44Her head just got run over!

0:33:44 > 0:33:47But she is still on. Just needs to get too her feet.

0:33:47 > 0:33:48Come on, Kate.

0:33:48 > 0:33:51Just one more jump. And she's across.

0:33:51 > 0:33:55That's nine points to Kate Lawler, with a little help from Iwan there.

0:33:55 > 0:33:59Bolt her arm back into the socket and she'll be fine.

0:33:59 > 0:34:02Right, now, still points up for grabs. Who will be next?

0:34:02 > 0:34:05Jeff's on. Just hanging on in there.

0:34:05 > 0:34:07Oh!

0:34:07 > 0:34:10Now he's joined by Michaela.

0:34:10 > 0:34:13Just needs to get to his feet.

0:34:13 > 0:34:18Oh, he's chickened out. Again. But Michaela is still on. She needs to get to her feet quickly.

0:34:18 > 0:34:22Good stuff. Good stuff. Ouch!

0:34:22 > 0:34:24No! No!

0:34:24 > 0:34:28Oh dear! That's a no. Still no.

0:34:28 > 0:34:29No.

0:34:33 > 0:34:35Slide up. Slide across it.

0:34:35 > 0:34:37Kate Lawler, Crash Mountain expert there.

0:34:37 > 0:34:40- Joe's made it. Eight points to him. - Woo!

0:34:41 > 0:34:44Now, can Tony make it? He's on.

0:34:44 > 0:34:46Just needs to get to his feet.

0:34:48 > 0:34:50He's made it to the centre. That's seven points to him.

0:34:50 > 0:34:54Great effort. Made that look easy.

0:34:54 > 0:34:59Now the remaining celebrities need to get a move on. Antony now.

0:34:59 > 0:35:01This might be his final chance to score some decent points.

0:35:01 > 0:35:03Come on.

0:35:07 > 0:35:11No. This could be game over for Antony.

0:35:12 > 0:35:15Jeff now with a last-ditch attempt.

0:35:15 > 0:35:17No! No!

0:35:17 > 0:35:18Yes! Come on!

0:35:19 > 0:35:22I'm not sure if that's legal, but he's across. Four celebs left.

0:35:22 > 0:35:24Sian hasn't tried once.

0:35:24 > 0:35:27Pretty sure Ninia is out. Antony, I'm not sure.

0:35:27 > 0:35:29Michaela, I don't know.

0:35:30 > 0:35:32She's going for it.

0:35:32 > 0:35:34Oh...suddenly this is looking good

0:35:34 > 0:35:36and she's made it.

0:35:36 > 0:35:40Bit of a team effort there earns Michaela Strachan five points.

0:35:44 > 0:35:46- KLAXON SOUNDS - There goes the klaxon.

0:35:46 > 0:35:48It's game over. There are six on the podium.

0:35:48 > 0:35:51Let's see which five have made it through to Dizzy Dummies.

0:35:51 > 0:35:54I've got to do so maths now, so bear with me...

0:35:54 > 0:35:58Iwan's maximum ten points on Crash Mountain puts the former athlete in top spot.

0:35:58 > 0:36:02Joe is just one behind after his incredible Qualifier run.

0:36:02 > 0:36:04Kate and Jeff are in third and fourth.

0:36:04 > 0:36:08And this is close - Michaela and Tony are tied on 12 points.

0:36:08 > 0:36:13What happens now? In the event of a draw, the person with the fastest Qualifier time goes through.

0:36:13 > 0:36:16So Michaela gets to join the others in Dizzy Dummies.

0:36:16 > 0:36:19- DOWNBEAT JAZZ MUSIC - It's goodbye to Tony,

0:36:19 > 0:36:23Antony, Sian, Ninia and Nancy.

0:36:23 > 0:36:29I'm sure they'll probably pop up again on The Hole In The Wall or The One Show...some time.

0:36:30 > 0:36:32I gave it two good goes.

0:36:32 > 0:36:37Two good goes and then I decided not to give it any more goes.

0:36:37 > 0:36:41I've got terrible balance. I literally froze.

0:36:41 > 0:36:45I've got the world's worst balance.

0:36:45 > 0:36:49I tried to do it. I was really, really just...

0:36:49 > 0:36:53gutted, man! Bad.

0:36:54 > 0:36:57I'm not happy. I wanted...

0:36:57 > 0:37:01that Wipeout Zone. I really wanted to go to the Wipeout Zone.

0:37:01 > 0:37:03Sorry, kids.

0:37:03 > 0:37:06Watch me, have a good laugh.

0:37:06 > 0:37:08Who cares?!

0:37:10 > 0:37:12MUSIC FINISHES

0:37:13 > 0:37:14- Thank you. - APPLAUSE

0:37:14 > 0:37:17Just in case you didn't think I was actually playing it...

0:37:17 > 0:37:19HE PLAYS POORLY

0:37:22 > 0:37:23Yeah.

0:37:23 > 0:37:26Proof. Now it's time for Dizzy Dummies.

0:37:33 > 0:37:38It all starts with a fast spin in the Dizzy Dummy, followed by a clamber over the goalpost.

0:37:38 > 0:37:41Then the celebrities must traverse the Blob.

0:37:41 > 0:37:43Last one across is eliminated.

0:37:43 > 0:37:47Then, more spinning and a trip over the Crazy Beams.

0:37:47 > 0:37:50Again, the last one across is eliminated.

0:37:50 > 0:37:52That's what this show is all about -

0:37:52 > 0:37:55celebrities being sick for charity.

0:37:55 > 0:37:58Want to see a celebrity spinning out of control?

0:37:58 > 0:38:00Well, I've got a treat for you. Here's five.

0:38:00 > 0:38:04- It's Dizzy Dummies. You all ready? - Yes.- No!

0:38:04 > 0:38:07This lot were born ready. 3, 2, 1!

0:38:07 > 0:38:10KLAXON SOUNDS

0:38:10 > 0:38:12As the show business merry-go-round begins,

0:38:12 > 0:38:16it's time for a reminder of just who today's Dizzy Dummies are.

0:38:16 > 0:38:18He's used to going this fast, just not round in circles.

0:38:18 > 0:38:22- It's time to take on these big red balls!- It's speedy boy, Iwan.

0:38:24 > 0:38:26- Agh! - She's a faller, she's a brawler.

0:38:26 > 0:38:29- Wish me luck. - It's Kate, "The Faller" Lawler.

0:38:31 > 0:38:35Half man, half... er, lady? I don't know.

0:38:35 > 0:38:38It's ex-EastEnder, Joe Absolom.

0:38:38 > 0:38:43Then there's Emperor Ming's arch enemy - Jeff Gordon Brazier.

0:38:43 > 0:38:50And finally it's Michaela Strachan, who amazingly looks about the same here...

0:38:50 > 0:38:52as she does here.

0:38:54 > 0:39:00Michaela calibrates herself, and they're off! Sort of.

0:39:00 > 0:39:02Lot of staggering.

0:39:07 > 0:39:09Iwan's over the goal.

0:39:09 > 0:39:10And Jeff. And Joe.

0:39:13 > 0:39:16Not Michaela.

0:39:16 > 0:39:18Iwan on to The Blob, racing ahead.

0:39:18 > 0:39:20Oh, no, slips right off!

0:39:20 > 0:39:24400 metres on a running track - fine for Iwan, but five metres on

0:39:24 > 0:39:27an inflatable peppermint, now there's a problem.

0:39:27 > 0:39:29Jeff taking the lead, but Joe's chasing.

0:39:31 > 0:39:33- Come on, Kate! - Now there's an opening for Kate.

0:39:33 > 0:39:38Steady. This game isn't really about speed, more about balance.

0:39:38 > 0:39:40Michaela's heading the chase.

0:39:40 > 0:39:44Come on. Oh, no!

0:39:44 > 0:39:47She didn't mind the gap, and look what's happened.

0:39:47 > 0:39:52Swallowed by the celebrity-munching Blob. That'll make the papers.

0:39:52 > 0:39:55Michaela in the lead now, will she avoid the gap?

0:39:57 > 0:40:00She's hanging on. Come on, Michaela.

0:40:00 > 0:40:05Oh, no. No. Joe managed to knock Michaela to safety. What a gent.

0:40:05 > 0:40:09- That's it, Michaela.- One jump now. Michaela's so close. Come on.

0:40:09 > 0:40:12Hang in there.

0:40:12 > 0:40:17Every ounce of strength. Yes. Yes, she's up, and she's made it to the finish line. Incredible.

0:40:17 > 0:40:20Michaela's first through.

0:40:20 > 0:40:21- Yes!- Clearly, Iwan wants to join her.

0:40:21 > 0:40:25Wow! Oh, dear.

0:40:25 > 0:40:30Slow down, Iwan, this isn't the Olympics. And that certainly isn't a running track.

0:40:30 > 0:40:36Kate once again in pole position. Will she mind that gap the second time around? She misses the gap...

0:40:36 > 0:40:40but still slips in. The Blob causing complete celebrity carnage out there today.

0:40:40 > 0:40:42Jeff taking it steady.

0:40:42 > 0:40:44Very steady. Oh, dear.

0:40:44 > 0:40:47A bit too steady.

0:40:47 > 0:40:50Until the end, which suddenly looks very unsteady.

0:40:52 > 0:40:56Joe, though, back on, and moving like a frog. It's working.

0:40:58 > 0:41:01Big jump required now. Come on...this is looking good.

0:41:01 > 0:41:04Yes?

0:41:04 > 0:41:08Better by the second for Joe. Can he make it? One final jump.

0:41:08 > 0:41:14Yes, Joe is through, which means you, Iwan, Kate and Jeff are competing for just two places now.

0:41:14 > 0:41:17Iwan looking good.

0:41:17 > 0:41:19Well, he was until he disappeared from sight.

0:41:19 > 0:41:23That red top is bringing down more celebs them a...red top.

0:41:24 > 0:41:28Kate back on the Blob, looking focused.

0:41:32 > 0:41:36- Oh, please.- It's no good pleading, it's the Blob. It won't hear you.

0:41:38 > 0:41:40Needs a good jump now, and she'll have made it.

0:41:40 > 0:41:43Jeff is closing in, though.

0:41:43 > 0:41:46- I've never seen anyone so scared of a pontoon.- I would jump,

0:41:47 > 0:41:49because Jeff is right behind you.

0:41:49 > 0:41:51- Jump on my feet?- Yes, yes.

0:41:51 > 0:41:54Jeff jumps, Kate jumps. Oh no!

0:41:54 > 0:41:58Yes! Kate's across, but Jeff is swallowed by the gap.

0:41:58 > 0:42:05So either Iwan or Jeff is about to be eliminated. Here comes Iwan.

0:42:05 > 0:42:08A final dash.

0:42:08 > 0:42:10No!

0:42:10 > 0:42:14Iwan's down. This is looking decidedly dangerous now.

0:42:18 > 0:42:21Jeff. Can he make it? Come on, looking tired.

0:42:23 > 0:42:27This is where it gets dangerous, from here on in.

0:42:27 > 0:42:29Ye-ye-ye-ye-yes. OK, that's it.

0:42:32 > 0:42:34- Take your time, take your time. - Will Iwan get another chance?

0:42:34 > 0:42:36He's ready and waiting. He might not.

0:42:41 > 0:42:47Jeff is through to the next round, which, unbelievably, means Iwan Thomas has been eliminated.

0:42:47 > 0:42:50You said to me you wanted to get to the Wipeout Zone.

0:42:50 > 0:42:53That's all I wanted to do, but listen, I was beaten by four better people.

0:42:53 > 0:42:58It was tough, but whoever makes it, well done. Make the most of it, because I wanted to do it.

0:42:58 > 0:43:00Listen, hard luck. You've been absolutely fantastic.

0:43:00 > 0:43:02Well done to get this far.

0:43:02 > 0:43:04- Thank you very much. - Go and get dried off.

0:43:04 > 0:43:07So, incredibly, an Olympic athlete has been beaten by

0:43:07 > 0:43:09two TV presenters, an actor and a Big Brother winner.

0:43:09 > 0:43:11Who knows what's going to happen next?

0:43:22 > 0:43:25Ah well. They're off. Limbering up.

0:43:27 > 0:43:30Getting ready. Joe, first to the goal...ish. No.

0:43:33 > 0:43:35Jeff now quickly up and over.

0:43:35 > 0:43:39A nice acrobatic landing, too. Very elegant.

0:43:42 > 0:43:44So now to the Crazy Beams for Jeff.

0:43:47 > 0:43:49Ooh...

0:43:49 > 0:43:51No. No.

0:43:51 > 0:43:55Back to the start for him. Joe now.

0:43:55 > 0:43:58Kate floundering a bit there.

0:43:58 > 0:44:02Joe taking a measured approach. It's paying off, though. He's staying on.

0:44:03 > 0:44:06It's back to the start for Michaela.

0:44:08 > 0:44:10Kate is still in the running.

0:44:11 > 0:44:15Joe now very nearly across. Come on.

0:44:18 > 0:44:23Just one leap now between him and the Wipeout Zone.

0:44:23 > 0:44:25- Yes!- He's done it.

0:44:25 > 0:44:28Joe grabs one of the coveted spots in the final.

0:44:28 > 0:44:31Two places remain. Who will be joining him?

0:44:31 > 0:44:33Jeff makes cautious progress,

0:44:33 > 0:44:35gently inching his way towards the finish line.

0:44:36 > 0:44:39Oh! No, Michaela's in the water again.

0:44:40 > 0:44:43Jeff weighing up his next move.

0:44:43 > 0:44:46He's on. But can he stay on?

0:44:46 > 0:44:48- Yes, he can.- You've got it.

0:44:48 > 0:44:49And, yes! Jeff is through.

0:44:49 > 0:44:54So either Kate or Michaela is about to be eliminated.

0:44:57 > 0:45:01There is just one place left, so they might want to get a move on.

0:45:01 > 0:45:02A fantastic effort from Kate.

0:45:02 > 0:45:05Come on, Michaela. Fight, fight for it.

0:45:05 > 0:45:09It could all be over for Michaela now, and Kate is across.

0:45:10 > 0:45:13Look at her, just beaming from ear to ear. She's enjoying this!

0:45:13 > 0:45:18Michaela, you were so, so close.

0:45:18 > 0:45:21I really struggled getting on that first one.

0:45:21 > 0:45:25Once you're on, it's easy. It probably doesn't help if you're little.

0:45:25 > 0:45:29Because you kind of dive on to it, not quite tall enough to reach.

0:45:29 > 0:45:32They really wanted to get through, and I'm pleased with where I've got.

0:45:32 > 0:45:34And I've had a really good time.

0:45:34 > 0:45:38So, today's Wipeout Zone competitors have been decided.

0:45:38 > 0:45:41Here's an interesting bit of Wipeout trivia for you.

0:45:41 > 0:45:44All three finalists have something in common.

0:45:44 > 0:45:47They all share the same occupation.

0:45:47 > 0:45:49Yep, they're all celebrities.

0:45:49 > 0:45:52Time to see what reaching the final round means to them all,

0:45:52 > 0:45:54even if it means absolutely nothing.

0:45:54 > 0:45:57At least Joe's an actor, so he can lay it on thick for us,

0:45:57 > 0:45:59might even get some tears!

0:45:59 > 0:46:01He is an actor, isn't he, not a racing...? He's an actor.

0:46:04 > 0:46:07My training for this consisted of joining a gym.

0:46:07 > 0:46:11I'm quite lethargic, I think I only went twice to the gym, so...

0:46:14 > 0:46:17Nothing can prepare you for Total Wipeout.

0:46:17 > 0:46:20It's been so much tougher than I expected it to be.

0:46:20 > 0:46:24The bruises won't last too long, but the memories will last a long time.

0:46:24 > 0:46:29People say it's not about the winning, it's the taking part that counts. But to win is really good.

0:46:29 > 0:46:33I'm slightly apprehensive of losing to Kate Lawler,

0:46:33 > 0:46:37that would kill me. Ha! That would kill me.

0:46:38 > 0:46:41I think I've got a very worthy charity to donate 10,000 to,

0:46:41 > 0:46:45and it would be major bragging rights for my kids at school.

0:46:45 > 0:46:47I would love it if I beat Jeff and Joe.

0:46:47 > 0:46:49I would love to win this, love it.

0:46:49 > 0:46:52It would be the best thing I'd ever done.

0:46:52 > 0:46:54A mixture of nerves and excitement.

0:46:54 > 0:46:57It's going to be water, tough, something I've never done before.

0:46:57 > 0:47:00If I get knocked off, I'll get up as quick as I can

0:47:00 > 0:47:03and keep on until there's nothing left in the tank.

0:47:03 > 0:47:05Just give it all. I'll only be here once.

0:47:05 > 0:47:08- I will give it my best shot. - It really is anybody's.

0:47:10 > 0:47:13Where they're going, there is no guest list.

0:47:13 > 0:47:16There's no red carpet, and there's no VIP treatment.

0:47:16 > 0:47:18It's just them on their own.

0:47:18 > 0:47:21With Amanda. And a cameraman.

0:47:21 > 0:47:24And lots of health and safety people. It's the Wipeout Zone.

0:47:29 > 0:47:33Here's what awaits today's famous competitors.

0:47:33 > 0:47:36Killer Surf, Celebrity Slide,

0:47:36 > 0:47:41Rapid Climb, Showbiz Waterfall, the Balance Beam.

0:47:41 > 0:47:44An all-star Precarious Ledge.

0:47:44 > 0:47:45Crazy Sweeper.

0:47:45 > 0:47:49A glitzy Spinning Arm, followed by a glamorous Rope Swing

0:47:49 > 0:47:51to the five-star Rotating Platform.

0:47:51 > 0:47:54Finishing with a jump to the renowned Podium,

0:47:54 > 0:47:57where the Famous Button stops the Illustrious Clock.

0:47:57 > 0:48:04Fastest one wins a shiny cup and £10,000 for the charity of their choice.

0:48:04 > 0:48:07It's been a long, hard day for our celebrities.

0:48:07 > 0:48:10And it's about to get even longer and harder.

0:48:10 > 0:48:13It's the Wipeout Zone, and the first to brave it tonight is Kate.

0:48:18 > 0:48:22So, Kate "The Faller" Lawler is tonight's first celebrity crash test dummy.

0:48:25 > 0:48:28- Wish me luck.- Good luck.

0:48:28 > 0:48:30Well, she's away.

0:48:34 > 0:48:37Well, she spins around to perfectly face the Rapid Climb.

0:48:37 > 0:48:41Nice work, Kate. Just a swim to the Rapid Climb.

0:48:41 > 0:48:44She needs to pull herself up as quickly as possible.

0:48:47 > 0:48:49Once on the start of it,

0:48:49 > 0:48:52she's got ten seconds before a tidal wave is unleashed.

0:48:52 > 0:48:54That ten seconds starts now.

0:48:58 > 0:49:01Oh, no, she's struggling already. This isn't good.

0:49:01 > 0:49:03I'm scared.

0:49:03 > 0:49:05- HOOTER BLOWS - Oh, no, oh, no!

0:49:11 > 0:49:15She really stood no chance against that wall of water.

0:49:15 > 0:49:20A terrible start for Kate. Swept away by the thundering cascades.

0:49:23 > 0:49:25And she now has to do it all over again.

0:49:25 > 0:49:27That has cost her a lot of time.

0:49:33 > 0:49:36Doing much better now, though. Come on, Kate.

0:49:42 > 0:49:45Now Kate reaches the Balance Beam.

0:49:45 > 0:49:46Come on, Kate.

0:49:47 > 0:49:51Her heart will be thumping, but she needs to steady her feet here.

0:49:51 > 0:49:54What's she doing? Shoelace undone?

0:49:54 > 0:49:57That's not balancing, that's crawling.

0:49:57 > 0:49:59She'll be walking funny for days.

0:49:59 > 0:50:02Now she's kind of shuffling along.

0:50:02 > 0:50:06This technique is going to cost Kate even more time.

0:50:06 > 0:50:08Come on!

0:50:14 > 0:50:17I think it would have been easier if you'd done it the normal way, Kate.

0:50:25 > 0:50:26She's cleared it.

0:50:26 > 0:50:27But look at that.

0:50:27 > 0:50:31Taking so much time she's been overtaken by the rubber ring.

0:50:31 > 0:50:33Come on!

0:50:33 > 0:50:35Waiting for the perfect moment.

0:50:35 > 0:50:39All in the timing, she's off.

0:50:39 > 0:50:41And ducking.

0:50:41 > 0:50:45Got to be fast now, that arm is coming back round.

0:50:45 > 0:50:47Go, go, go.

0:50:47 > 0:50:48Yes!

0:50:48 > 0:50:51The Tarzan Swing now. Kate can get back on track here.

0:50:54 > 0:50:57- Oh!- No. She just ended up getting back in the water.

0:50:57 > 0:51:00Loses her grip mid-swing.

0:51:00 > 0:51:02Yet another time delay for Ms Lawler.

0:51:07 > 0:51:10Nearly there now, Kate. A climb up on to the Turntable.

0:51:10 > 0:51:13And then one final jump to the Finish Podium.

0:51:16 > 0:51:18One last leap now.

0:51:19 > 0:51:22And Kate completes the Wipeout Zone in 5:18.

0:51:24 > 0:51:27With apparently some energy to spare.

0:51:31 > 0:51:34Kate's Wipeout Zone run quickly came unstuck on the Rapid Climb,

0:51:34 > 0:51:36and she never really recovered.

0:51:36 > 0:51:42A gritty effort, but the benchmark she's set could well be beaten.

0:51:42 > 0:51:45You got off to a slow start. What was going on?

0:51:45 > 0:51:47There was, like, water, and a wave.

0:51:47 > 0:51:49I've never seen anything like it.

0:51:49 > 0:51:52Did you see me keep...? Why didn't someone give me a nose peg?

0:51:52 > 0:51:55I tell you now, your time was five minutes and 18.

0:51:55 > 0:51:58Five minutes 18? Dave-istated.

0:51:58 > 0:52:00Absolutely dave-istated.

0:52:00 > 0:52:03But it is the time to beat, so at the moment you're in the lead.

0:52:03 > 0:52:05Well done. Next to run is Jeff.

0:52:05 > 0:52:07Let's watch.

0:52:07 > 0:52:08Jeff Brazier now.

0:52:08 > 0:52:10Five minutes 18 is the time to beat.

0:52:10 > 0:52:13Here we go. Come on, Jethro. Good lad.

0:52:13 > 0:52:15Yep, there he went.

0:52:17 > 0:52:20Wow! A 180 degree flip.

0:52:20 > 0:52:22A spectacular start.

0:52:22 > 0:52:25Hits the water hard.

0:52:26 > 0:52:29Straight into a swift front crawl to the Rapid Climb.

0:52:31 > 0:52:32For the celebrity edition,

0:52:32 > 0:52:35we've imported 10,000 gallons of mineral water.

0:52:35 > 0:52:37But it is still cold and wet.

0:52:37 > 0:52:40Ten second tidal wave countdown has begun.

0:52:40 > 0:52:45Can he reach the top before the torrents are unleashed? Come on!

0:52:47 > 0:52:51It looks like he's going to try and ride it out. Here it comes!

0:52:51 > 0:52:54And he's holding on for dear life.

0:52:54 > 0:52:55Survives the wave.

0:52:55 > 0:52:57Good effort, Jeff.

0:53:00 > 0:53:02He's cleared it. The Balance Beam next.

0:53:02 > 0:53:05Hopefully Jeff will walk on it, not shuffle along.

0:53:05 > 0:53:07On his posterior.

0:53:10 > 0:53:14This is more like it. Come on. Well ahead of Kate so far.

0:53:14 > 0:53:17Just needs to stay on that beam.

0:53:20 > 0:53:24Precarious. But stay on it he has.

0:53:24 > 0:53:28The Crazy Sweeper now. Kate defeated this obstacle in style.

0:53:28 > 0:53:30Can Jeff do the same?

0:53:31 > 0:53:33Picks his moment.

0:53:33 > 0:53:34And he sets off.

0:53:34 > 0:53:36Come on, quick.

0:53:36 > 0:53:38Quick, quick, quick, quick!

0:53:38 > 0:53:39Oh no!

0:53:41 > 0:53:44So much promise, but that arm was nowhere near Jeff.

0:53:44 > 0:53:47He just ducked out. That's going to cost him.

0:53:49 > 0:53:52Into the water, that means a swim and a painful climb.

0:53:52 > 0:53:56Seconds lost there, but this is still looking like a good time.

0:53:58 > 0:54:01The Tarzan Swing. Time to see if his grip is stronger than Kate's.

0:54:04 > 0:54:07He's away, great swing. And he's on to the turntable.

0:54:07 > 0:54:10Just one final push.

0:54:13 > 0:54:18Great finish. And an impressive time. 2:37.

0:54:18 > 0:54:22That was a strong run from Jeff. Slight delay on the Rapid Climb,

0:54:22 > 0:54:27and that voluntary swim on the Crazy Sweeper were the only things that slowed him down.

0:54:27 > 0:54:31Joe will have to do something pretty special if he's going to beat Jeff.

0:54:32 > 0:54:34- How are you doing, young man?- Good.

0:54:34 > 0:54:38I'm annoyed with myself for slipping off, I think I would have made it round.

0:54:38 > 0:54:40I did the rope well, stayed on there.

0:54:40 > 0:54:44I'm happy with some bits, not with others. But it'll all pan out.

0:54:44 > 0:54:47You were great, Jeff. But, Kate did a fantastic job tonight.

0:54:47 > 0:54:51There's a possibility we could have had a female champion,

0:54:51 > 0:54:53but, I'm afraid not, Kate. Jeff was faster.

0:54:53 > 0:54:56So I'm afraid you're going to have to go to join the others.

0:54:56 > 0:54:59Jeff, it means yours is the time to beat.

0:54:59 > 0:55:02In the lead so far, one guy to go. We'll see what happens.

0:55:02 > 0:55:03Time will tell. Let's watch.

0:55:04 > 0:55:05Good job, man.

0:55:10 > 0:55:14Joe's got his tough guy face on, and he's ready to go.

0:55:14 > 0:55:172:37 is a hard time to beat.

0:55:23 > 0:55:27Wow! That was fast. But he survived the impact.

0:55:27 > 0:55:28A quick swim to the Rapid Climb.

0:55:28 > 0:55:32Remember, Joe doesn't know how Jeff or Kate have done.

0:55:32 > 0:55:36All he can do is post the best time he can possibly manage.

0:55:39 > 0:55:42And he's up. Ten seconds starting now.

0:55:45 > 0:55:48But Joe's looking fast. He might even beat the wave.

0:55:48 > 0:55:53He has! This is a super fast start from Joe.

0:55:53 > 0:55:56OK, the Balance Beam now.

0:55:56 > 0:55:57He's on.

0:55:58 > 0:56:02And he's motoring across. Well, by Kate's standards, anyway.

0:56:03 > 0:56:04He's cleared it.

0:56:05 > 0:56:08The Crazy Sweeper is where Jeff's most costly error came.

0:56:08 > 0:56:11A slip from Joe here and this could be a very close finish.

0:56:11 > 0:56:16Oh no, he has slipped! But he's back on his feet and sprinting.

0:56:16 > 0:56:19Now jumping across the podiums, that arm is coming back,

0:56:19 > 0:56:21but this is superb stuff from Joe.

0:56:21 > 0:56:23A flawless run so far.

0:56:23 > 0:56:25Two obstacles left.

0:56:25 > 0:56:28Joe is looking like a winner.

0:56:28 > 0:56:30Oh no, the first mistake from Joe!

0:56:30 > 0:56:32His grip seemed to slip.

0:56:32 > 0:56:36And rather than slam into the turntable, he abandoned the rope.

0:56:38 > 0:56:40So it's up the ladder for Joe now.

0:56:40 > 0:56:42Where is the ladder? Here it comes.

0:56:46 > 0:56:50Despite his late error, Joe's time is very fast. A final jump now.

0:56:50 > 0:56:53Joe comes home in one minute 37 seconds.

0:56:53 > 0:56:56An awesome time by anyone's standards.

0:56:56 > 0:56:59Be they celebrity or mere mortal.

0:56:59 > 0:57:03A brilliant run from Joe has won him the title of Celebrity Total Wipeout Champion.

0:57:03 > 0:57:05But he doesn't know it yet,

0:57:05 > 0:57:09so it's time for Amanda to break a celebrity exclusive.

0:57:09 > 0:57:13Joe, Joe, Joe. How are you feeling?

0:57:13 > 0:57:15- Good. Real good.- Yeah? - Pleased, yeah.

0:57:15 > 0:57:19I've got to tell you, Jeff was absolutely brilliant out there.

0:57:19 > 0:57:21You two have been fantastic all day.

0:57:21 > 0:57:24Joe, you've seemed really calm, cool and collected.

0:57:24 > 0:57:28And that has just got you the title of Total Wipeout Champion.

0:57:28 > 0:57:30- You're the winner.- Yes!

0:57:30 > 0:57:32Woo!

0:57:32 > 0:57:37So actor Joe Absolom is tonight's Total Wipeout Celebrity Champion.

0:57:37 > 0:57:41Along with that highly sought-after trophy, Joe also wins £10,000

0:57:41 > 0:57:44for the Dame Hannah Rogers Trust in Plymouth.

0:57:44 > 0:57:47If one celebrity special wasn't enough,

0:57:47 > 0:57:48then boy, do we have a show

0:57:48 > 0:57:52that's pretty much exactly the same as this one for you next time.

0:57:52 > 0:57:53There will be some of this.

0:57:55 > 0:57:56And quite a bit of this.

0:57:58 > 0:58:01From me and Amanda, it's a celebrity special goodbye.

0:58:20 > 0:58:22Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:58:22 > 0:58:24E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk