0:00:01 > 0:00:04'We asked 500 extremely unusual questions to
0:00:04 > 0:00:05'thousands of British people.'
0:00:05 > 0:00:08Has anyone else ever knocked one out over Facebook?
0:00:08 > 0:00:12'The answers to those questions make a totally unique look at our lives -
0:00:12 > 0:00:15'the Britain Unzipped Report.
0:00:15 > 0:00:17- 'Tonight we'll be looking at booze.' - Yeah.
0:00:17 > 0:00:21- 'Revealing a country that's drunk and disorderly.'- Oh, God!
0:00:21 > 0:00:24- We drink as much vodka as we can till we puke.- Back to you, Greg.
0:00:24 > 0:00:27'We'll be using one beautiful celebrity...'
0:00:27 > 0:00:30If I went home with a guy and he had shit-coloured sheets..
0:00:30 > 0:00:34- '..this girl's naked mother...'- Why's your mother naked all the time?
0:00:34 > 0:00:38- '..and some single lads in Wales...' - Welcome to chez Cardiff.
0:00:38 > 0:00:42'..to discover why we're all heading for a hangover.'
0:00:42 > 0:00:45- # It's my turn to talk! # - # Yeah. #
0:00:45 > 0:00:47'This is Britain Unzipped!'
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Grow up!
0:00:49 > 0:00:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:08 > 0:01:12CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:12 > 0:01:18Hello and welcome to Britain Unzipped. This is Russell Kane.
0:01:18 > 0:01:20CHEERING
0:01:20 > 0:01:23And that thing there, about a foot taller than me -
0:01:23 > 0:01:26Gandalf to my Frodo - is Greg James.
0:01:28 > 0:01:32If you're interested in what British people ACTUALLY get up to, then this is the show for you.
0:01:32 > 0:01:35Over the next few weeks, we'll be sneaking a peek through the curtains
0:01:35 > 0:01:38of this great, but very weird country, to expose the REAL Britain.
0:01:38 > 0:01:42And how have we done this? Well, by creating the Unzipped Report.
0:01:42 > 0:01:45Now, this report contains the answers to over 500...
0:01:45 > 0:01:49Thank you. ..questions. And a lot of those questions were very personal.
0:01:49 > 0:01:51Yeah, but you gave some very honest answers.
0:01:51 > 0:01:54Tonight we'll reveal the answers to these questions.
0:01:54 > 0:01:58- At what age do we first get drunk? - Is it acceptable to take a dump in a nightclub?
0:01:58 > 0:02:01How often do single men change their sh-eets?
0:02:01 > 0:02:04How many of us have seen our parents naked?
0:02:04 > 0:02:07Is it normal to give our private parts a nickname? Bobby.
0:02:09 > 0:02:12And if you've ever sat in a pub, turned to a mate
0:02:12 > 0:02:13and uttered these words?
0:02:13 > 0:02:17Has anyone else ever knocked one out over Facebook?
0:02:17 > 0:02:19Well, we know the answer to that too, sadly.
0:02:19 > 0:02:24We won't shy away from asking celebrities some very personal questions as well.
0:02:24 > 0:02:28Which must be exciting news for our guest. It's Holly Willoughby!
0:02:28 > 0:02:31- Hello.- Hiya!- Hello, Russell.
0:02:31 > 0:02:35- Hi, Holly, how are you doing?- Hi, boys. I'm a bit scared about this.
0:02:35 > 0:02:38You don't need to be scared if you're normal. How normal do your think you are?
0:02:38 > 0:02:42Rate yourself from one to ten. Ten being weird and one being normal.
0:02:42 > 0:02:45OK, I reckon I'm pretty normal.
0:02:45 > 0:02:50Reckon if sort of one is abnormal then I reckon I'm about an eight, I hope.
0:02:50 > 0:02:51OK. Well, we'll tell you...
0:02:51 > 0:02:52If you prove me wrong
0:02:52 > 0:02:56- I'll be very upset about this.- We'll tell you because we'll go through your results and compare them
0:02:56 > 0:03:00- to the rest of the British public. If you're a freak, we'll tell you. - Brilliant(!)
0:03:00 > 0:03:03- Holly, we'll see you later. - Thank you.- Bye.
0:03:06 > 0:03:09Holly's answers might be influenced by the fact that
0:03:09 > 0:03:13she grew up near Brighton in the southeast of England.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15People in the southeast, women are more likely
0:03:15 > 0:03:18to fancy their partner's brother than anywhere else in Britain.
0:03:18 > 0:03:21Yes. But people in the southwest are actually their partner's brother.
0:03:21 > 0:03:25- Yeah? Yo, give me seven! - We love a generalisation like that.
0:03:25 > 0:03:29But here's a real one for you. Listen. If you come from Essex, like me - Essex! - right?
0:03:29 > 0:03:33There's a 45% chance - 45% - that at some stage
0:03:33 > 0:03:38you've put your willy between your legs and pretended to be a girl.
0:03:40 > 0:03:44- And...and you have?- Yeah, I genuinely have as well. I did it as a dare.
0:03:44 > 0:03:47I'd had a few Sambucas, which is compulsory when you grow up in Essex,
0:03:47 > 0:03:49and we were at Piccadilly Circus Station,
0:03:49 > 0:03:52it was really busy, and me and my friend both did full mangina
0:03:52 > 0:03:54with our knob between our legs, like that.
0:03:54 > 0:03:58We stood there in the rush hour. This is the shocking bit - we did a full reversal to everyone looking.
0:04:00 > 0:04:03It looked like someone had smashed up a raw chicken with a hammer.
0:04:03 > 0:04:08Strange but true. Here's what else is heading your way tonight!
0:04:08 > 0:04:10CHEERING AND APPLAUSE. 'Drunk and unzipped.
0:04:10 > 0:04:14'Russell goes down the pub to find out why this country can't get laid without getting pissed.'
0:04:17 > 0:04:21'Men and women unzipped. Are we really that different? To right we are.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23'And we'll prove it with the help of a Cockney cabbie,
0:04:23 > 0:04:26'a tasty surprise and this naked mother.'
0:04:26 > 0:04:29It's hot in here and it's not the Aga, it's you, baby!
0:04:31 > 0:04:32'Holly unzipped!
0:04:32 > 0:04:35'So let's get up close and extremely personal by asking
0:04:35 > 0:04:37'some invasive questions to tonight's special guest.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40'Let's meet the face of The Voice!'
0:04:40 > 0:04:43APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:04:43 > 0:04:48- Please welcome to Britain Unzipped - it's Holly Willoughby!- Whoo!
0:04:48 > 0:04:50MIMICS CHIMPANZEE
0:04:50 > 0:04:52Thank you.
0:04:52 > 0:04:56- I can't actually turn around until I've heard the voice. Holly? - Hi, Russell.
0:04:56 > 0:04:58- Ah, I like that.- Do a little will.I.am head. Why do they...
0:04:58 > 0:05:01They dance with their heads, don't they? They have distinct...
0:05:01 > 0:05:03Well, it's hard to dance in a chair.
0:05:03 > 0:05:06He looks like he's smelt something a bit inappropriate, will.i.am.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09I don't know what's in that but I don't like the smell of it.
0:05:09 > 0:05:10I love The Voice.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12- Do you?- Jessie is my favourite.- I love her, too.
0:05:12 > 0:05:17A few weeks ago when she went - # It's my turn to talk yea-eah! # -
0:05:17 > 0:05:20- that's the best way to get into a conversation.- I know.
0:05:20 > 0:05:24We should just bring that into everyday conversation, just start singing - like an opera.
0:05:24 > 0:05:27I'm just apologising, in a way, for all the personal stuff we now
0:05:27 > 0:05:31have to ask you because you've been horribly honest in your report.
0:05:31 > 0:05:33Well, you have to be, don't you?
0:05:33 > 0:05:35You must be honest and we've got some amazing responses from you.
0:05:35 > 0:05:38Time for your normality questions which is where
0:05:38 > 0:05:40we used the report to discover whether you,
0:05:40 > 0:05:42Holly Willoughby, are normal, or not.
0:05:42 > 0:05:44OK. Yeah.
0:05:44 > 0:05:49- OK, this is compared to the rest of the women in Britain.- OK. - If you could lose a limb,
0:05:49 > 0:05:51which one would you lose?
0:05:51 > 0:05:54- Um, my left leg.- Why?
0:05:54 > 0:05:59Well, I wouldn't want to lose an arm because I use my hands a lot and...
0:06:01 > 0:06:05- Absolute filth.- # She's everybody's girl. #- You've got filthy minds in this audience, haven't we?
0:06:05 > 0:06:12I'd lose a leg because you can get a very good prosthetic leg now
0:06:12 > 0:06:14so I don't think you'd mind it too much.
0:06:14 > 0:06:18With your hands, that thing is probably harder to replicate.
0:06:18 > 0:06:20I can reveal you're fractionally not normal.
0:06:20 > 0:06:24Only 49% of women would choose to lose their leg.
0:06:24 > 0:06:26- The rest of them say, "Take my arm off."- Do they?- Yeah.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29- It's weird, isn't it?- Weird!
0:06:29 > 0:06:32Have you ever bet that a marriage wouldn't last?
0:06:32 > 0:06:35- I've not like taken money for it. - Haven't you?- No.- Be honest.
0:06:35 > 0:06:38I've not gone, "Let's have a wager. How much are you going to give?
0:06:38 > 0:06:42"Let's put it in the pot." I've never done that but I've gone, "Mmm, it won't last."
0:06:42 > 0:06:43At the wedding?
0:06:43 > 0:06:45- BOTH:- Oh, my God, she has!
0:06:45 > 0:06:50- I actually have.- Who was it?- No, it was... No! No! Are you kidding me?!
0:06:50 > 0:06:55- Who was it?- No way. I actually nearly said it. No, no, no, I cannot say.
0:06:55 > 0:06:58It was a very, very long time ago is all I'm going to say.
0:06:58 > 0:07:01- Ah, but are they still married? - Yes.- BOTH:- Oh!
0:07:01 > 0:07:03- Are you gutted? - It's only a matter of time.
0:07:05 > 0:07:09- The truth will come out! Well, I can reveal that you are not normal. Not at all.- Oh...
0:07:09 > 0:07:11Only 16% of people
0:07:11 > 0:07:14are so horrible that they bet a marriage wouldn't last.
0:07:14 > 0:07:17- Oh, no! No, no, no. - You're in that cold minority.
0:07:17 > 0:07:18No back-pedalling!
0:07:18 > 0:07:22- 16% of people are honest enough to say that they think that. I reckon it's higher.- It's a blind survey.
0:07:22 > 0:07:26You cannot get out of this. Not only have you amputated your leg but you hate people.
0:07:26 > 0:07:30- Next question. OK, picture the scene.- Yeah.
0:07:30 > 0:07:36- A friend's private sex video has been stolen...- Yeah.- ..and leaked online. Say Phillip Schofield's.
0:07:36 > 0:07:38Do you watch it?
0:07:38 > 0:07:40Absolutely!
0:07:41 > 0:07:43- Yeah, who wouldn't?- Why wouldn't you?
0:07:43 > 0:07:45I would.
0:07:47 > 0:07:51- Did you watch the Tulisa video? - Of course.- Shall we do it?
0:07:54 > 0:07:55What?
0:07:59 > 0:08:02- What? - Well, I can reveal that the women
0:08:02 > 0:08:04who answered the survey, that's not normal.
0:08:04 > 0:08:07Only 28% of women are pervy enough that they'd want to watch
0:08:07 > 0:08:10Schofield's balls swinging around.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12That's not the question they asked.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14If you'd asked that question, I'd say 90% would say yes.
0:08:14 > 0:08:1728% of women said they would watch their friend
0:08:17 > 0:08:21- going at it in a sex video. Again... - Yeah, but to for sexual kicks.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23It's how... When you say it, it sounds dirty and sordid.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26That's because I am.
0:08:26 > 0:08:29- It was, "Would you?" Like, "Yeah."- Next question.
0:08:29 > 0:08:33Have you ever kissed someone because it was easier than not kissing them?
0:08:33 > 0:08:35- Perhaps Phillip Schofield before This morning?- Never.
0:08:35 > 0:08:40- Why do you keep bringing him into it? Yes, I have. Yeah, I have.- OK.
0:08:40 > 0:08:44I've been on dates where it's not been going great and it's been
0:08:44 > 0:08:48easier just to go, "I'm just going to kiss you now and say, "Bye-Bye, let's speak tomorrow,""
0:08:48 > 0:08:52rather than go, "This has been awkward."
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- Hm. Goodbye. - I don't really know what to say now.
0:08:55 > 0:08:59Sometimes it's quicker just to kiss somebody than to explain.
0:08:59 > 0:09:01- Well, that is... - It was a very long time ago.
0:09:01 > 0:09:05- I've been married a very long time. - Don't lie. You can't back-pedal now.
0:09:05 > 0:09:09- Is that weird too? - No, that is in fact normal.
0:09:09 > 0:09:14More women... 54% of women have kissed a guy just to get rid of him.
0:09:14 > 0:09:18- Yeah. Good. Well, no, that's not good.- No, it's not.- But it's right.
0:09:20 > 0:09:24All right, last one. Would you eat a human if you were starving to death?
0:09:24 > 0:09:27If somebody had asked me this question before I'd had kids,
0:09:27 > 0:09:28I'd have said, "No."
0:09:28 > 0:09:31- But since having kids. - You decided to eat people?!- No!
0:09:33 > 0:09:37- Let me explain.- Placenta omelette! - This does make sense.
0:09:37 > 0:09:40This does make sense. If it was just me on my own, I'd rather die.
0:09:40 > 0:09:44But it would be like that thought that I had to get back for them.
0:09:44 > 0:09:47And it would be like they would need me in their life,
0:09:47 > 0:09:49so you'd do anything to survive for them.
0:09:49 > 0:09:53- Mm.- So that's. Now, you're going, "Aw."- That's sweet.
0:09:53 > 0:09:55- After me saying that. - That's sweet now.
0:09:55 > 0:09:59- That's where that's the difference. - Cos I've got cats, I would probably cook Greg's leg.
0:09:59 > 0:10:01Just to get back to Keith and Wayne.
0:10:01 > 0:10:04The very fact that you would cross that threshold if you had to
0:10:04 > 0:10:07and you were starving, makes you not normal.
0:10:07 > 0:10:11Only 28% of women would eat human flesh if they were starving.
0:10:11 > 0:10:12And that's kind of it. But, Russ,
0:10:12 > 0:10:16- ask one more.- Oh, yeah, sorry. How big is Phillip Schofield's willy?
0:10:20 > 0:10:21- Grow up.- Sorry.
0:10:22 > 0:10:25After those questions, we can safely say that compared to
0:10:25 > 0:10:28- the rest of the women in Britain, you are very odd, really.- Yeah.
0:10:28 > 0:10:31- I thought you were about to say, "Very normal."- BOTH: No, no.
0:10:31 > 0:10:35- Thank you, Holly for giving us very honest answers.- Am I?
0:10:37 > 0:10:39Still to come, we find out how much men and women
0:10:39 > 0:10:41really know about each other
0:10:41 > 0:10:45and reveal the city where 8% of the inhabitants - that's 50,000 people -
0:10:45 > 0:10:48claim they get drunk every single day of their lives.
0:10:48 > 0:10:52Plus Holly will be sticking around to hear some very unusual
0:10:52 > 0:10:53celebrity confessions.
0:10:53 > 0:10:56But first, let's link up with our cameras in Wales,
0:10:56 > 0:10:59where we'll be using the Britain Unzipped report
0:10:59 > 0:11:01to help out some BBC Three viewers.
0:11:01 > 0:11:04That's right. It's time for We Know Where You Live.
0:11:04 > 0:11:06APPLAUSE
0:11:11 > 0:11:15This week, we're helping these four single lads in Cardiff.
0:11:15 > 0:11:17According to our report, if you're a man in Wales,
0:11:17 > 0:11:19you're more likely to be single
0:11:19 > 0:11:21than someone living anywhere else in Britain.
0:11:21 > 0:11:24That's single or, as the Welsh would say... "Krrch!"
0:11:24 > 0:11:26LAUGHTER
0:11:26 > 0:11:29And with a bit of luck, we should be able to go to their house right now.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32- There it is! - Ah, look.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35They've got doors, just like the English.
0:11:35 > 0:11:37Let's go inside, let's go inside.
0:11:37 > 0:11:40- WELSH VOICE:- We might see some of their traditional Welsh pelts
0:11:40 > 0:11:42- and hunting furs. - OK, that looks OK.
0:11:42 > 0:11:44I've seen boy's houses that are worse than that.
0:11:44 > 0:11:47Oh, there's the lads. Wahey, the lads!
0:11:47 > 0:11:50Hello, Cardiff!
0:11:50 > 0:11:52APPLAUSE
0:11:54 > 0:11:55You lot need to be careful
0:11:55 > 0:11:58about remaining single in Wales for too long.
0:11:58 > 0:12:00Our report has unearthed some frightening facts.
0:12:00 > 0:12:04Thanks to our report, we know that single men are 86% more likely
0:12:04 > 0:12:06to be unhappy than men in a relationship.
0:12:06 > 0:12:10Yep, that is wyth deg chwech per cent.
0:12:10 > 0:12:1524% of people living in Wales have done a bit of stalking.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17That's dau deg pedwar per cent.
0:12:17 > 0:12:20And listen to this - 22% of people living in Wales have admitted
0:12:20 > 0:12:23to fancying someone they're actually related to.
0:12:23 > 0:12:28Dau deg dau per cent o bobl Cymru yn cyfaddef
0:12:28 > 0:12:32eu bod fancying rhywun y maent yn ymwneud a.
0:12:32 > 0:12:34APPLAUSE
0:12:36 > 0:12:38That was spot on.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41So, lads in Cardiff, how come you lot haven't been snapped up yet then?
0:12:41 > 0:12:43Well, I think I speak for all the boys
0:12:43 > 0:12:47when I say it's probably cos Holly's still in a relationship.
0:12:47 > 0:12:48LAUGHTER
0:12:48 > 0:12:51- Yeah.- Hm. I'm not so sure.
0:12:51 > 0:12:53I think it might be something
0:12:53 > 0:12:55to do with these facts that we've uncovered.
0:12:55 > 0:12:59Apparently, Alex, you're always too shitfaced to seal the deal.
0:12:59 > 0:13:03- Too off your head. - That sounds about right, yeah.
0:13:03 > 0:13:06"Rrr, come on, lads!"
0:13:06 > 0:13:08Ethan's lack of success with the ladies may be due to the fact
0:13:08 > 0:13:11that he's more interested in his mates
0:13:11 > 0:13:14because apparently once, when Rob got lucky,
0:13:14 > 0:13:16Ethan sat outside Rob's bedroom
0:13:16 > 0:13:18and serenaded him by getting on the guitar
0:13:18 > 0:13:21and playing Let's Get It On. Is that true?
0:13:21 > 0:13:22LAUGHTER
0:13:22 > 0:13:24- He deserved it.- Cheers, mate(!)
0:13:24 > 0:13:28That's called a musical cock block. Bang out of order.
0:13:28 > 0:13:29LAUGHTER
0:13:29 > 0:13:33Apparently Rob is living on another planet
0:13:33 > 0:13:36and is too dopey to realise girls are interested. Druggie!
0:13:36 > 0:13:38LAUGHTER
0:13:38 > 0:13:40Keelan, one thing we know about you
0:13:40 > 0:13:43is that although you're a real ladies man,
0:13:43 > 0:13:46you've never ever had a girlfriend.
0:13:46 > 0:13:47Vir-gin! Vir-gin!
0:13:47 > 0:13:48LAUGHTER
0:13:48 > 0:13:51I just think it's down to personal taste.
0:13:51 > 0:13:54I just haven't found the correct girl yet.
0:13:54 > 0:13:57So you haven't found the one, is that what you're saying.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59FRIENDS: Ah!
0:13:59 > 0:14:01Ha-ha-ha!
0:14:01 > 0:14:03Ah!
0:14:03 > 0:14:06Keelan's got a sensitive side, bless his heart.
0:14:06 > 0:14:10Keelan, we discovered that 13% of single men only change their sheets every three months.
0:14:10 > 0:14:14It must be related to the fact that they don't have a lady in their life.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17It might sound sexist but, just out of interest, Keelan,
0:14:17 > 0:14:22- how often do you change your sheets? - Ooh, not for a while.
0:14:22 > 0:14:26I want numbers, I want months.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28I'd say about a month.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30Let's find out, shall we?
0:14:30 > 0:14:32Because, with the help of Holly,
0:14:32 > 0:14:36I've actually got Keelan's real, actual bedsheet from Wales.
0:14:36 > 0:14:37LAUGHTER
0:14:37 > 0:14:39You've been stitched right up by your mates.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42So Keelan, you've got no idea we got your bedsheet.
0:14:42 > 0:14:44Have you ever seen CSI before?
0:14:44 > 0:14:46LAUGHTER AND GROANING
0:14:46 > 0:14:49Is it like a murder scene on there?
0:14:49 > 0:14:51You know the bit where they sort of examine the crime scene
0:14:51 > 0:14:54with a UV torch and stuff?
0:14:54 > 0:14:57Well, we're going to get Holly to get a UV torch
0:14:57 > 0:15:00and we're going to sort of show up your DNA, as it were.
0:15:00 > 0:15:02LAUGHTER
0:15:02 > 0:15:06- Can I just say something?- Yeah. - If I went home with a guy and he had shit coloured sheets...
0:15:06 > 0:15:08LAUGHTER
0:15:11 > 0:15:14APPLAUSE
0:15:14 > 0:15:18OK, OK. Right, OK.
0:15:18 > 0:15:21- Let's dim the light.- Holly, you have your torch at the ready?
0:15:21 > 0:15:24Keelan, are you ready?
0:15:24 > 0:15:26With this light, I shall reveal what you've been up to.
0:15:26 > 0:15:28Let's just scan the sheet.
0:15:28 > 0:15:29Arrgh!
0:15:29 > 0:15:31LAUGHTER
0:15:31 > 0:15:34- What's that? That's DNA! - That's got a major one there.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36Look at that.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39It looks like someone's knocked over a church candle.
0:15:39 > 0:15:41LAUGHTER
0:15:41 > 0:15:44I think we could almost work out which end's the head end here.
0:15:44 > 0:15:47GROANING
0:15:47 > 0:15:51That's falling asleep on your tummy crying that one, isn't it?
0:15:51 > 0:15:53Actually check the corners, Greg.
0:15:53 > 0:15:56- Check the corner, cos I don't want to hold the spunk.- Where you're holding?
0:15:56 > 0:15:59- Yeah.- No, you're all right there.
0:15:59 > 0:16:02- You need to... - ALL: Argh!
0:16:02 > 0:16:06LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:16:06 > 0:16:09Oh, my God!
0:16:13 > 0:16:15I never thought I would utter the sentence,
0:16:15 > 0:16:18"I've just touched Keelan's sperm."
0:16:18 > 0:16:22- Oh, my god!- I'm not touching it. I'll be pregnant again!
0:16:22 > 0:16:25- Disgusting.- That's so horrible.
0:16:25 > 0:16:28There's a lesson there to all men. Change your sheets regularly.
0:16:28 > 0:16:32You never know when a TV show's going to turn up at your house, steal your bedding
0:16:32 > 0:16:35and get Holly Willoughby to examine your spunk with a blue torch.
0:16:35 > 0:16:38Oh, my God. Gross! So, boys, we're going to give you a little...
0:16:38 > 0:16:40Don't do the...!
0:16:40 > 0:16:42LAUGHTER
0:16:44 > 0:16:45Oh, god!
0:16:45 > 0:16:48- Can we dim the lights? - No!
0:16:48 > 0:16:51Can we just check?
0:16:51 > 0:16:53Greg is clear.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56Oh, you're all right.
0:16:56 > 0:16:58It's just, "Bluerrgh!"
0:16:58 > 0:17:02They were just as nervous as Keelan was. Keelan, you're not on your own.
0:17:02 > 0:17:05Oh, my God. Try his face.
0:17:05 > 0:17:08LAUGHTER
0:17:08 > 0:17:09APPLAUSE
0:17:14 > 0:17:17OK, boys, we're going to give you a challenge. You need to complete this
0:17:17 > 0:17:19before the end of the show. Listen carefully.
0:17:19 > 0:17:22We need you to stop seeing girls as objects, right?
0:17:22 > 0:17:25Start treating them as princesses.
0:17:25 > 0:17:26Your challenge is to convert your house
0:17:26 > 0:17:29into a female-friendly shav...haven.
0:17:29 > 0:17:31LAUGHTER
0:17:31 > 0:17:33By the time we come back, we expect to see girls
0:17:33 > 0:17:37- being preened and pampered.- But not entered. Don't get carried away.
0:17:37 > 0:17:40Now, you can find women anywhere you like.
0:17:40 > 0:17:42You can persuade absolutely anyone.
0:17:42 > 0:17:44If you have to, go down the nursing home
0:17:44 > 0:17:47and just lure back some crusties with Werther's Originals.
0:17:47 > 0:17:50As long as they're female, it doesn't matter.
0:17:50 > 0:17:53If you succeed, we'll give you a very exciting mystery prize.
0:17:53 > 0:17:56We'll be back soon to see how you get on. Good luck, lads in Cardiff!
0:17:56 > 0:17:59APPLAUSE
0:17:59 > 0:18:01Don't smell it!
0:18:01 > 0:18:05Now, all those challenges are of course based on info we uncovered
0:18:05 > 0:18:08when we surveyed single men in Wales.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11But if there's one thing we're going to learn in this series,
0:18:11 > 0:18:15it's that there's no such thing as normal anywhere in Britain.
0:19:08 > 0:19:12Holly will be sticking around as we delve deeper into the moist
0:19:12 > 0:19:15folds of the Unzipped report. But to see how normal you are
0:19:15 > 0:19:19compared to her and the rest of the country, go to the website.
0:19:19 > 0:19:22Just click on Britain Unzipped, answer the questions honestly
0:19:22 > 0:19:24and receive your own report.
0:19:24 > 0:19:27You'll find some questions in there about drinking and drunken behaviour
0:19:27 > 0:19:30because, when it comes to alcohol, it's fair to say that this country
0:19:30 > 0:19:33is pretty screwed up. I went down to the pub to find out why we're
0:19:33 > 0:19:36so often down the pub, down the pub, pubbity-pub-pub. Pub.
0:19:36 > 0:19:39LAUGHTER
0:19:39 > 0:19:43Britain. We're about the only country in the world which,
0:19:43 > 0:19:46when told we're the worst drinking culture, our response isn't...
0:19:46 > 0:19:50- That's terrible, Dave!- I know! Hoe can we fix our culture, Barry?
0:19:50 > 0:19:52No. Unfortunately, the response
0:19:52 > 0:19:56to the British culture of "dangerous drinking" is more...
0:19:56 > 0:19:59Come on, Gary! Drink up!
0:19:59 > 0:20:02ALL: Down it! Down it! Down it!
0:20:07 > 0:20:10Cover him in Sambuca, set him alight
0:20:10 > 0:20:12and float him down the Thames!
0:20:12 > 0:20:14Rule Britannia!
0:20:14 > 0:20:16CHEERING
0:20:20 > 0:20:23Given that the average age that we first get hammered is 15...
0:20:23 > 0:20:24Pint of bitter, please.
0:20:24 > 0:20:26Yeah, 15.
0:20:26 > 0:20:30Do you think all this booze could be linked to our messed-up sex lives?
0:20:30 > 0:20:33I mean, take the Americans. They can do sober dating no problem.
0:20:33 > 0:20:36- AMERICAN ACCENT:- Hey, Carol. I know it's lunchtime and were both sober
0:20:36 > 0:20:40on a Tuesday, but how about I take you out for a salad and a coffee?
0:20:40 > 0:20:43Oh wow, Brian! I've always really liked your direct
0:20:43 > 0:20:45and sober approach. Okey-diddly-dokley!
0:20:45 > 0:20:49Imagine that behaviour in Britain without alcohol.
0:20:49 > 0:20:51Hey, so look. I know it's daytime, we're sober and in the street...
0:20:51 > 0:20:53- Get back!- Oh, God! Oh!
0:20:56 > 0:20:58See, my theory is simple.
0:20:58 > 0:21:01Our British repressions stop us emoting at a healthy level.
0:21:01 > 0:21:05We'd rather die than do anything when we're sober all week.
0:21:05 > 0:21:09But come Friday night, all sorts of filthy hell breaks loose.
0:21:09 > 0:21:11Nothing all week, nothing all week...
0:21:11 > 0:21:14It's Friday night! Finger me in the disableds, Darren!
0:21:14 > 0:21:16See, I don't make the rules.
0:21:16 > 0:21:18But fill the Brits full of enough Sambuca
0:21:18 > 0:21:22and they soon start going at each other like a chief at a tribal drum.
0:21:22 > 0:21:25Welcome to my village! I put it in you and you like it!
0:21:25 > 0:21:27APPLAUSE
0:21:27 > 0:21:30So according to Russell, a lot of our problems in life
0:21:30 > 0:21:34stem from our difficult relationship with alcohol. As we heard,
0:21:34 > 0:21:37it probably doesn't help that we're as young as 15 years old
0:21:37 > 0:21:38when we start getting drunk. 15!
0:21:38 > 0:21:42Yeah, so we thought we'd find out from some of the gobbier members
0:21:42 > 0:21:44of the audience why this might be.
0:21:44 > 0:21:46Any of you lot? Who got drunk before they were 15?
0:21:46 > 0:21:49Who? In Essex, of course, that is normal.
0:21:49 > 0:21:53In fact, in Essex we sometimes do an in-uterine injection of Sambuca
0:21:53 > 0:21:55while the baby's growing.
0:21:55 > 0:21:59It comes out lit and we drink the amniotic fluid afterwards.
0:21:59 > 0:22:00LAUGHTER
0:22:00 > 0:22:03What about if you were getting drunk before you were a teenager?
0:22:03 > 0:22:07Hands up for 11 or 12? You?
0:22:07 > 0:22:11- Oh! Hi, what's your name?- Joe. - Joe? How old were you?- 11.
0:22:11 > 0:22:14How did it happen? Accidental or what?
0:22:14 > 0:22:17- The spirits cabinet round people's houses.- People's houses?
0:22:17 > 0:22:20Yeah, you'd go round a friend's house for a sleepover,
0:22:20 > 0:22:21parents have gone down the pub,
0:22:21 > 0:22:24- "We'll have a look in there." Next thing, you've got a bottle of vodka out.- Wow!
0:22:24 > 0:22:29Sitting there in your sleeping bags, drinking neat vodka then running to the toilet and throwing up.
0:22:29 > 0:22:33Sounds just like the Railway Children, doesn't it?
0:22:33 > 0:22:36What a sweet story. Holly, how old were you when you first got drunk?
0:22:36 > 0:22:42I don't know. Probably about sort of 17.
0:22:42 > 0:22:46Liar. Seven! It was seven!
0:22:48 > 0:22:51The Brits not only drink young but they also drink very regularly.
0:22:51 > 0:22:54How often do the girls here go out and get pissed?
0:22:54 > 0:22:57Who goes out really regularly? Give me a cheer.
0:22:57 > 0:23:00Loads of you. So what goes on?
0:23:00 > 0:23:04Just get really drunk, drink as much vodka as we can till we puke.
0:23:04 > 0:23:09- Really?- Basically, yeah. - Oh my God, I've got a hard-on.
0:23:09 > 0:23:12And what's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened
0:23:12 > 0:23:15to you when you've been that wasted? If you even remember it.
0:23:15 > 0:23:17- Woke up in the wrong bed. - What do you mean?
0:23:17 > 0:23:23- Just woke up in the wrong beds. - Do you mean with the wrong footballer?- Yeah.
0:23:23 > 0:23:31So, where's Sonny? Apparently you've never got drunk? Gay, gay, gay!
0:23:31 > 0:23:35- Sorry, that was inappropriate. - Following you around. - Oh, really?
0:23:35 > 0:23:38Never drunk. I don't feel part of this bunch at all.
0:23:38 > 0:23:43- So, what, you're teetotal? - Teetotal mainly because of boxing. - Oh, shit. Sorry, I didn't mean that.
0:23:43 > 0:23:50I totally respect that, yeah? See you later. So, what, you're just like proper health conscious?
0:23:50 > 0:23:54No, I just go to the gym a lot and I watch him get drunk. He's a nightmare.
0:23:54 > 0:23:58So he's like your friend you just carry around to watch him get pissed?
0:23:58 > 0:24:02- What's your name?- Jack. - Yeah, it's Pissed Jack!
0:24:02 > 0:24:04I look after him. Jack the Beard.
0:24:04 > 0:24:08- Yeah, if anyone messes with him, you just knock them out, don't you? - Hit and run, hit and run.
0:24:08 > 0:24:11That's a lovely story over here.
0:24:11 > 0:24:17Obviously Sonny doesn't need booze to have a good time, but a lot of other people do, like Adam here.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19I think booze does definitely make it easy to pull.
0:24:19 > 0:24:26It makes your inhibitions less and makes you think you're a lot better looking than you actually are.
0:24:26 > 0:24:27OK.
0:24:27 > 0:24:31Now, what's the most amount of people you've got off with on a night?
0:24:31 > 0:24:34- Over 20. Over 20 on a night out, yes.- Boys or girls?- Boys.
0:24:34 > 0:24:36- Just the boys?- Yeah. - Gay, gay!
0:24:39 > 0:24:42Now, of course, if you drink too much,
0:24:42 > 0:24:46you can end up covering yourself, or even worse someone else, in puke.
0:24:46 > 0:24:53Who has vomited on someone else when they're drunk? Own up, guys, come on. OK.
0:24:53 > 0:24:58I went out with a group of friends, I was with this bloke, he's beautiful. Oh, he was so fit. Wow.
0:24:58 > 0:25:02Let's both join her, Greg. Come on.
0:25:02 > 0:25:05It was all arranged, like we're going home with each other.
0:25:05 > 0:25:07So we're in this bar and he's like, "Are you OK?"
0:25:07 > 0:25:12And as I turned around to say yes, I threw up all over him. And now he won't talk to me.
0:25:12 > 0:25:17- While you were snogging him? - No, I was talking to him.- You was like, "I really faaancy you."
0:25:18 > 0:25:21OK, well, thanks for that. Adam... Woo!
0:25:21 > 0:25:25I'm going to try and get off with her while you're doing that.
0:25:25 > 0:25:29- So Adam, I've been told that you had an incident whilst you were with a man.- Yeah.
0:25:29 > 0:25:41- What happened?- Pulled in a nightclub, and when we started performing oral sex, I vomited all over him.
0:25:43 > 0:25:46Pardon the pun, but how did that go down?
0:25:48 > 0:25:52Not too well, as you can imagine. As you probably can't, but...
0:25:52 > 0:25:57- Spoke to him again, or...? - No, it ended there.
0:25:57 > 0:26:00"Thanks for last night, really enjoyed the puke. Cheers."
0:26:00 > 0:26:03So there we go, it's just as I feared. When it comes to alcohol,
0:26:03 > 0:26:06this country and this audience especially has some serious issues.
0:26:06 > 0:26:12To cover up the uncomfortable silence that will now follow when I recommend you all seek some professional help,
0:26:12 > 0:26:18especially you, knob sicker, please give yourselves a massive round of applause. Thank you.
0:26:25 > 0:26:27Still to come, more from Holly.
0:26:27 > 0:26:30And we've asked some very intrusive and personal questions to Jon Snow
0:26:30 > 0:26:34and other leading intellectuals like Sinitta. Their answers are on the way.
0:26:34 > 0:26:39Now, let's explore the oldest, most contentious subject of all -
0:26:39 > 0:26:44nuclear disarmament, predominately focusing on Ahmadinejad and Iran. Not really! It's BBC Three!
0:26:44 > 0:26:47We're going to look at the difference between men and women.
0:26:47 > 0:26:48"I just want to stick it in you."
0:26:48 > 0:26:52"But I've got feelings. It's not that simple, Gary." Men and women there.
0:26:52 > 0:26:57And to help probe this thorny issue, we need the help of tonight's studio audience
0:26:57 > 0:26:59because it's time to play...
0:27:05 > 0:27:11Over the course of the series we'll be using our audience to answer the most important question of all.
0:27:11 > 0:27:13Who's best - girls or boys?
0:27:13 > 0:27:17Representing the boys, please boo or cheer as appropriate, it's Sam.
0:27:17 > 0:27:20CHEERING AND BOOING
0:27:20 > 0:27:24And representing the girls, it's Eloise.
0:27:24 > 0:27:25CHEERING AND BOOING
0:27:25 > 0:27:29OK, let's get a few lazy gender stereotype questions out of the way first of all.
0:27:29 > 0:27:31Sam, you're a bloke. Do you prefer football or fights?
0:27:31 > 0:27:34I play rugby so it's got to be fighting, hasn't it?
0:27:34 > 0:27:40- Lager or bitter?- Lager. - JLS or One Direction?- One Direction. - Why?
0:27:40 > 0:27:46- They've been likened to the Beatles. - Have they?- Yeah, apparently. - OK, fine, whatever.
0:27:46 > 0:27:49Right, it's time for your lazy stereotypes now, Eloise.
0:27:49 > 0:27:52As you're a girl and not a bloke, they're just open-ended
0:27:52 > 0:27:55so just express yourself, babe, say whatever you want.
0:27:55 > 0:27:58It's more about the emotional components of your answer than anything else.
0:27:58 > 0:28:00Why is love so totes difficult?
0:28:00 > 0:28:03Don't know, babes. Just don't know.
0:28:03 > 0:28:07Do you think men and women are just emotionally different and ultimately incompatible but need each other?
0:28:07 > 0:28:09Yeah, sure.
0:28:09 > 0:28:14And finally, me or Greg or both or consecutively?
0:28:14 > 0:28:18I'll just tag you in when I'm done.
0:28:19 > 0:28:23- I'll go with both? - Yeah! Chest bump.
0:28:23 > 0:28:28We've got some questions about the difference between men and women. Eloise, every question you get right
0:28:28 > 0:28:33entitles you to one of these prizes from a collection of girly cliches.
0:28:33 > 0:28:40We've got things like candles and a hair visor, teddy bears, even some rose wine as well.
0:28:40 > 0:28:43APPLAUSE
0:28:43 > 0:28:49- And Sam, you of course get to choose from proper geezer prizes. - Huuurgh!
0:28:49 > 0:28:56Tonight we've got boxing gloves, dumb-bells, a Jeremy Clarkson DVD and an even a spirit level.
0:28:56 > 0:28:58Yeah!
0:28:58 > 0:29:04You know what, I even smashed it at the end. Just kicked it all over. Just didn't care.
0:29:04 > 0:29:08Eloise, we have got something extra for you that you might get very excited about.
0:29:08 > 0:29:13We heard that you're quite a big fan of Olly Murs.
0:29:13 > 0:29:17In fact, we know that you're a massive fan of Olly, because this is how you reacted last Christmas
0:29:17 > 0:29:21- when you were given some tickets to see him live. Have a look at this. - You're kidding.
0:29:23 > 0:29:25- MUM:- Try underneath the tissue paper.
0:29:25 > 0:29:28SHE SCREAMS
0:29:29 > 0:29:32Oh, my God!
0:29:39 > 0:29:43- Are you happy?- Yes.
0:29:49 > 0:29:52Hold your T-shirt up.
0:30:01 > 0:30:06- Eloise, just remind us how old you are again - 10, is it?- 20. - 20?- Yeah.
0:30:06 > 0:30:12Don't worry, Eloise, I was exactly the same when I got my Joe McElderry tickets back in 2009.
0:30:12 > 0:30:14So as well as those other prizes,
0:30:14 > 0:30:19Olly has very kindly donated this personalised and signed CD for you.
0:30:19 > 0:30:24It's got your name on it, Eloise, and you could win it if you get the questions right.
0:30:24 > 0:30:27But if not, I will stamp on it while you watch.
0:30:27 > 0:30:29LAUGHTER
0:30:29 > 0:30:32And he's even sent you this message. Have a look.
0:30:34 > 0:30:36Hi, Eloise. Olly Murs here.
0:30:36 > 0:30:41I've just seen the footage of you getting my tickets for my tour and it's really, really funny.
0:30:41 > 0:30:44I've got to say, I really hope you enjoy the show.
0:30:44 > 0:30:47But most importantly, you're on Britain Unzipped tonight
0:30:47 > 0:30:50so my fingers are crossed for you, babe.
0:30:50 > 0:30:55Have a great night, good luck and I look forward to seeing you soon. Stay cheeky.
0:30:59 > 0:31:03She's crying! Do a close up on her crying. Crying!
0:31:04 > 0:31:11- Aw babes, you all right, do you need a hug?- Yeah.- Come here, darling. She's emotional, bless her.
0:31:11 > 0:31:15- Now, Sam, we did some research on you as well and we found out... - Right.
0:31:15 > 0:31:18..absolutely nothing interesting at all. So no extra prizes.
0:31:18 > 0:31:19LAUGHTER
0:31:19 > 0:31:24- Sorry, mate, nothing. - Let's get started. OK, lighting change.
0:31:24 > 0:31:26- AUDIENCE:- Woo!
0:31:26 > 0:31:32Yes, woo. Here's the first question. We asked...
0:31:32 > 0:31:37Write the answers down, please.
0:31:37 > 0:31:39- Holly.- Yeah?
0:31:39 > 0:31:42Have you seen your parents naked recently?
0:31:42 > 0:31:45I see my mum naked all the time.
0:31:47 > 0:31:51- Why?- It's not like she's a naturist or anything. - Why's your mum naked all the time?
0:31:51 > 0:31:56- No, she's not like... - Just in ASDA like that. "I want a chicken, please."
0:31:56 > 0:32:03- No, but like she's my mum. - I don't go, "Hey, Mum, let me see your vag. It's a Tuesday."
0:32:03 > 0:32:07Don't turn this into something dark and sordid and filthy.
0:32:07 > 0:32:11Right, the time is up. Sam, what have you written?
0:32:11 > 0:32:17- What percentage of women as adults have seen their parents naked?- 22%.
0:32:17 > 0:32:21- You've gone with 22%. Eloise, what have you got? - I have gone with a rather high 40%.
0:32:21 > 0:32:24It must be a girl thing. Girls look at their parents naked.
0:32:24 > 0:32:29Well, the correct answer is actually 17% of adult women have seen their parents naked.
0:32:29 > 0:32:31Which means the winner is Sam.
0:32:31 > 0:32:32APPLAUSE
0:32:34 > 0:32:37That means you immediately bag a manly prize.
0:32:37 > 0:32:43You've bagged nothing. Oh, smashy, smashy destruction.
0:32:43 > 0:32:48Now, Eloise, we've managed to get our hands on a nice photo of your mum.
0:32:48 > 0:32:54- She's a very beautiful woman, just like you are. Let's have a look. - Ah. How hot is your MILF of a mum?
0:32:54 > 0:32:57Unbelievable. Have you seen her naked recently, then?
0:32:57 > 0:32:59No, I don't think so.
0:32:59 > 0:33:04- Are you sure your mum doesn't do any glamour modelling ever? - No!- Really?
0:33:04 > 0:33:08That's odd because in my spare time, I do a bit of amateur photography.
0:33:08 > 0:33:13Nothing mucky, but I'm pretty sure that I met your mum last week.
0:33:25 > 0:33:31- Are you ready, Greg? - Yeah, Tina, ready. Come on through, let's go.
0:33:39 > 0:33:40Lovely!
0:33:41 > 0:33:43Really good.
0:33:45 > 0:33:49OK, Tina, I like this - it's like Nigella. Even sexier.
0:33:49 > 0:33:50Perfect!
0:33:50 > 0:33:53Use the cherries as nipples.
0:33:53 > 0:33:55Wonderful.
0:33:55 > 0:33:59Yeah, two buns. Love the buns. Loving the buns, Tina!
0:33:59 > 0:34:03- Lush!- You're like a sexy Helen Mirren. We love it.
0:34:04 > 0:34:07Lovely! The lids look great.
0:34:07 > 0:34:10Hopefully you're not allergic to Teflon.
0:34:10 > 0:34:13Really nice. It's hot in here, and it's not the Aga. It's you, baby.
0:34:13 > 0:34:18Toss your head back. Yeah! Give the lids a spin. Oh, loved it! Yes!
0:34:18 > 0:34:21Lovely. Really good. We love that.
0:34:21 > 0:34:23Yes, that is the one!
0:34:23 > 0:34:26We are done, Tina! Really good. We smashed it. High five!
0:34:26 > 0:34:28Not a high five. Can we get a top for Tina, as well?
0:34:28 > 0:34:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:34:36 > 0:34:38I just can't believe you didn't know about that.
0:34:38 > 0:34:41Very nice photos there. I picked out a few of my favourites.
0:34:41 > 0:34:44Well, my personal favourite was this one.
0:34:46 > 0:34:48- The classic! - And this one as well.
0:34:48 > 0:34:51- Nice.- But there was one that I thought went a little bit far.
0:34:59 > 0:35:00You didn't know that was coming, did you?
0:35:03 > 0:35:05Gotcha! Serves you right
0:35:05 > 0:35:07for saying I've got a spunky face.
0:35:09 > 0:35:12Please thank your mum from me. She was a delight. She was.
0:35:16 > 0:35:19- "She was a delight"? Greg?- OK.
0:35:19 > 0:35:20This is a special treat
0:35:20 > 0:35:22for you to give to the whole family this Christmas.
0:35:22 > 0:35:24It's the calendar.
0:35:24 > 0:35:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:35:26 > 0:35:27Yeah?
0:35:29 > 0:35:32It's a proper calendar. We made the whole thing.
0:35:32 > 0:35:34- That is yours.- Lovely. There we go, darling. That's yours.
0:35:34 > 0:35:36Next week, it's your gran.
0:35:39 > 0:35:41OK, next question is:
0:35:41 > 0:35:43what percentage of men have admitted to masturbating
0:35:43 > 0:35:46whilst looking at someone's Facebook page? Gross! Disgusting!
0:35:46 > 0:35:49OK, what do you reckon? Write that down, please.
0:35:49 > 0:35:52- They've got to admit it, though. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
0:35:52 > 0:35:54- So, some of us just wouldn't say if we did or not.- No.
0:35:54 > 0:35:56I sometimes look how many friends I've got
0:35:56 > 0:35:59and just knock one out immediately.
0:35:59 > 0:36:03Masturbating over Facebook. Quite specialist pornography, that.
0:36:03 > 0:36:05People are discussing it!
0:36:05 > 0:36:07People at home, it's being discussed heavily in the studio.
0:36:07 > 0:36:09Right, let's find out what your answers are.
0:36:09 > 0:36:11What percentage of men -
0:36:11 > 0:36:13bearing in mind men are sticks with tennis balls and a stalk
0:36:13 > 0:36:16that go ooh-ooh!
0:36:16 > 0:36:18What percentage of man have masturbated
0:36:18 > 0:36:21whilst looking at someone's Facebook page? Eloise?
0:36:21 > 0:36:23Well, I thought they're going to have to admit it.
0:36:23 > 0:36:25I put 6%, cos I don't think many would admit that.
0:36:25 > 0:36:28What do we think, pervy truck driver Sam?
0:36:28 > 0:36:30- I reckon 35%.- Yeah, I bet you do.
0:36:31 > 0:36:34I bet you're on your BlackBerry like that. In a lay-by.
0:36:38 > 0:36:40I can now reveal that the percentage of men
0:36:40 > 0:36:44who's done knocky-out-ings over Facebook is...
0:36:44 > 0:36:46- 9%, so Eloise is the winner.- Nice.
0:36:46 > 0:36:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:36:48 > 0:36:51Now, that doesn't seem like that much,
0:36:51 > 0:36:53but if you do the maths, that equates to
0:36:53 > 0:36:571,120,000 British men
0:36:57 > 0:37:00who have updated their statuses all over Facebook.
0:37:00 > 0:37:01GROANING
0:37:01 > 0:37:03Yeah. Exactly.
0:37:03 > 0:37:07For some reason, men in London do this more than anywhere else.
0:37:07 > 0:37:1115% of London men have confessed to knocking one out over Facebook.
0:37:11 > 0:37:14What? No, I'm sorry, I refuse to believe that. You stay here.
0:37:14 > 0:37:17I'm off to find a decent, honest, proper salt-of-the-earth cockney
0:37:17 > 0:37:18to talk about this.
0:37:18 > 0:37:22I'm even going to exit using cockney head for traction.
0:37:22 > 0:37:24- COCKNEY ACCENT:- Polish. There's too many Polish everywhere.
0:37:24 > 0:37:26Ruinin' the country.
0:37:26 > 0:37:29I'm so right-wing I'm actually crippled from it.
0:37:29 > 0:37:32I'm off. See you later, babes.
0:37:33 > 0:37:36I'm going to go out and find someone proper.
0:37:52 > 0:37:53Taxi!
0:37:53 > 0:37:57Erm, have you ever masturbated over a social-network site?
0:37:57 > 0:37:59- No.- Back to you, Greg.
0:37:59 > 0:38:01APPLAUSE
0:38:05 > 0:38:08Thank you, Russell. A worthwhile trip. Here's the next question.
0:38:08 > 0:38:11We surveyed over 6,000 people in our report and asked,
0:38:11 > 0:38:13"Who makes you the angriest?"
0:38:13 > 0:38:17But what percentage of women answered, "My partner"?
0:38:17 > 0:38:19What percentage, do you reckon?
0:38:20 > 0:38:21Makes the angriest.
0:38:21 > 0:38:24Nice work! I liked him.
0:38:24 > 0:38:26That's quite far.
0:38:30 > 0:38:33OK, Sam, what have you written?
0:38:33 > 0:38:3480%.
0:38:34 > 0:38:3980% of women answered, "My partner".
0:38:39 > 0:38:40- Yeah.- Are you single?- No.
0:38:40 > 0:38:42And do you get on with your missus?
0:38:42 > 0:38:46- So-so.- Do you make her angry?- Yeah. - There we are.
0:38:46 > 0:38:49- Eloise?- I've gone with 40%.- 40%.
0:38:49 > 0:38:51Well, I can reveal the correct percentage of women
0:38:51 > 0:38:55that said their partner was the person who makes them angriest is...
0:38:55 > 0:38:5750%. Eloise, you've won. Well done.
0:38:57 > 0:38:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:39:01 > 0:39:06Now, Sam, we heard something about you from an ex-girlfriend
0:39:06 > 0:39:08which must be the best ever example
0:39:08 > 0:39:11of doing something to make your partner angry.
0:39:11 > 0:39:13Yeah. Apparently, Sam, you once went out
0:39:13 > 0:39:16with someone who worked at the RSPCA.
0:39:16 > 0:39:19Now, I'm an animal lover, and we are really easy to offend and get angry.
0:39:19 > 0:39:23Now, can anyone guess what Sam's gentle, boyish prank was
0:39:23 > 0:39:24to wind his ex up?
0:39:24 > 0:39:26That's right,
0:39:26 > 0:39:28he ate a dog.
0:39:28 > 0:39:30Explain yourself, Sam.
0:39:30 > 0:39:33- It wasn't in this country. - Well, that's fine, then(!)
0:39:33 > 0:39:36- I didn't go down the park and steal a dog or anything. - I often go abroad to murder...
0:39:36 > 0:39:38I was in Hong Kong,
0:39:38 > 0:39:43and it was on the menu, so I thought...
0:39:43 > 0:39:47"Strange place, strange food. I'll give it a go." And so I tried it.
0:39:47 > 0:39:50- Yeah, but you did it to wind her up. - Yeah, yeah, of course, yeah.
0:39:50 > 0:39:52Now, we think Sam should do something
0:39:52 > 0:39:55to make up to his ex-girlfriend and every dog lover
0:39:55 > 0:39:57and decent person in Britain
0:39:57 > 0:39:59for such disgusting behaviour, OK?
0:39:59 > 0:40:03Holly Willoughby, please bring in the dogburger.
0:40:06 > 0:40:10Notice there's no applause, just horrified silence.
0:40:10 > 0:40:13- Russell, please remove.- I just don't want to get the stench of it.
0:40:13 > 0:40:15Now, we must say, this does... HE GAGS
0:40:16 > 0:40:19This doesn't contain dog meat, just dog food, OK?
0:40:19 > 0:40:21GROANING
0:40:21 > 0:40:24No, no, no, come on, it's on a bed of lettuce and tomato, not sick.
0:40:24 > 0:40:27- Sam?- Yeah?
0:40:27 > 0:40:28HE GAGS
0:40:30 > 0:40:33- Swallow this.- Just a bite of it, maybe.- A bite of it.
0:40:33 > 0:40:36- Look at the jelly! Ugh! - Swallow a bit of this
0:40:36 > 0:40:39and we'll forget all about Hong Kong.
0:40:39 > 0:40:40Sam's got a sweat on, look!
0:40:40 > 0:40:43And if you don't, we'll not give you any of your prizes. None of 'em. OK?
0:40:43 > 0:40:46I'd rather eat that than a real dog.
0:40:46 > 0:40:48OK, so, er...
0:40:48 > 0:40:49take a bit of the old...
0:40:49 > 0:40:52- Put the bun on.- "Put the bun on it"!
0:40:52 > 0:40:56- "Stick the bun on it - I'm not an animal!"- Ugh!- Oh, it smells so bad!
0:40:59 > 0:41:01- Is he really going to do it? - Come on!
0:41:01 > 0:41:02CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:41:04 > 0:41:06Give him the plate.
0:41:07 > 0:41:11- Just drink some of that. - That's my water!
0:41:11 > 0:41:13GREG GAGS
0:41:13 > 0:41:15He needs to puke in that.
0:41:16 > 0:41:18We don't want it back!
0:41:18 > 0:41:19It's in my teeth.
0:41:21 > 0:41:24Why am I here?!
0:41:25 > 0:41:28- Thank you. Thank you.- I think we should give him an extra prize
0:41:28 > 0:41:31- just for dealing with that. - OK. OK.- Well done. Well done, Sam.
0:41:31 > 0:41:33CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:41:33 > 0:41:34And thank you, Holly.
0:41:34 > 0:41:36And that was the final question,
0:41:36 > 0:41:39so the winner of tonight's Man Versus Woman is Eloise!
0:41:39 > 0:41:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:41:43 > 0:41:47Sam and Eloise, thank you both for taking part. Enjoy your prizes.
0:41:47 > 0:41:50But here's what's still to come on tonight's show.
0:41:51 > 0:41:54Holly Unzipped - she kissed you and doesn't like you,
0:41:54 > 0:41:56she'd happily watch your sex video
0:41:56 > 0:41:59and she'd even bet your marriage won't last.
0:41:59 > 0:42:02And there's more shocking revelations to come from Miss Willoughby.
0:42:03 > 0:42:06Wales unzipped - Holly's got them to clean up their act,
0:42:06 > 0:42:09but how will four single men in Cardiff persuade some girls
0:42:09 > 0:42:11that they're proper boyfriend material?
0:42:13 > 0:42:16Celebs Unzipped - it's celebrity confession time.
0:42:16 > 0:42:19Stay tuned to find out whether Georgie, Jon and Sinitta
0:42:19 > 0:42:22spill the beans about sex, recurring nightmares
0:42:22 > 0:42:24and toe amputation.
0:42:24 > 0:42:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:42:33 > 0:42:36Now, earlier in the show, we met four single lads in Wales
0:42:36 > 0:42:39and warned them of the dangers of staying single for too long.
0:42:39 > 0:42:41Yeah, and to win a mystery prize, we set them the challenge
0:42:41 > 0:42:44of transforming their house into a more female-friendly haven.
0:42:44 > 0:42:46They had to find some girls to pamper.
0:42:46 > 0:42:49Holly, what do you reckon? You saw them earlier. You saw the sheet.
0:42:49 > 0:42:51Yeah, I saw Keelan's sheet. But the thing is,
0:42:51 > 0:42:53what we don't know is whether that was just
0:42:53 > 0:42:56male bodily fluid.
0:42:56 > 0:42:58So from the evidence on the sheet,
0:42:58 > 0:43:00I reckon they quite often have ladies back.
0:43:00 > 0:43:02You think that's female...pleasures?
0:43:02 > 0:43:05I think it's... a sign of togetherness.
0:43:05 > 0:43:06LAUGHTER
0:43:06 > 0:43:09That's lovely, babes! Lovely! So nice!
0:43:09 > 0:43:13- You kind of made it sweet. - He ruins everything!- Sorry,
0:43:13 > 0:43:15that's his mind. That's what he does.
0:43:15 > 0:43:18That's what women always say in the end.
0:43:18 > 0:43:19Let's get back to our cameras in Cardiff
0:43:19 > 0:43:23and see how Alex, Ethan, Rob and Keelan got on.
0:43:23 > 0:43:26Alex, there you are. The moment of truth. Please show us around.
0:43:26 > 0:43:29- Hello!- Hello. Right, welcome to Chez Cardiff.
0:43:30 > 0:43:31LAUGHTER
0:43:31 > 0:43:34- Over here, we have the lovely Jess.- Oh!
0:43:34 > 0:43:37- Lovely Jess, looking good enough to eat.- What's that?
0:43:37 > 0:43:39We've used peanut butter as a face pack
0:43:39 > 0:43:41and a bit of salami in place of some cucumber.
0:43:42 > 0:43:45Down here we've got her feet being soaked,
0:43:45 > 0:43:49and using some, er, correctional fluid to give her a lovely pedicure.
0:43:49 > 0:43:51LAUGHTER
0:43:51 > 0:43:53- Look at her face!- Come with me.
0:43:55 > 0:43:57Over here we have...
0:43:57 > 0:43:59- Rob and his magic hands...- What?!
0:44:00 > 0:44:04..performing a lovely little massage there on BB
0:44:04 > 0:44:07using some hot rocks from the garden.
0:44:07 > 0:44:10And also we've improvised a bit of cooking oil, as well.
0:44:11 > 0:44:13She looks like she's enjoying it.
0:44:15 > 0:44:17Right, down here...
0:44:17 > 0:44:21Oh, and we've also got a lovely bit of artwork up there for everyone.
0:44:21 > 0:44:23LAUGHTER
0:44:23 > 0:44:25We didn't have any rose petals left,
0:44:25 > 0:44:27cos we've already given the flowers away to the girls,
0:44:27 > 0:44:30so we chopped up a carrier bag...
0:44:30 > 0:44:33instead of petals.
0:44:33 > 0:44:35And here we have the "spar".
0:44:37 > 0:44:41- Oh!- And in here we have the lovely Ethan, serenading away.
0:44:41 > 0:44:42How's it going, guys?
0:44:42 > 0:44:46We've used some washing-up liquid.
0:44:46 > 0:44:48Johnny Depp's here for her, as well, Johnny Depp,
0:44:48 > 0:44:49looking like a Hasidic Jew.
0:44:51 > 0:44:56- And then we've got some tea lights, as well.- Nice!- Look nice, dunnit?
0:44:56 > 0:44:59That is brilliant work. I think you'll all agree, that is fantastic.
0:44:59 > 0:45:01I'm shocked!
0:45:01 > 0:45:02Amazing.
0:45:02 > 0:45:06I'm really impressed. Shall we give them the prizes, Holly, you reckon?
0:45:06 > 0:45:09Well, all three of those girls are extremely hot.
0:45:09 > 0:45:10They were, weren't they?
0:45:10 > 0:45:11They've done extremely well.
0:45:11 > 0:45:15Fellas, you're batting well above your weight.
0:45:15 > 0:45:17Oh!
0:45:17 > 0:45:19Cheek.
0:45:19 > 0:45:22I'm joking, I'm joking. I did actually like the fact you were...
0:45:22 > 0:45:24Hey!
0:45:24 > 0:45:26I like the fact that you were...
0:45:26 > 0:45:27LAUGHTER
0:45:27 > 0:45:29- Did he just send her away?- Yeah!
0:45:29 > 0:45:33I liked the fact that you cut up the plastic bags as rose petals.
0:45:33 > 0:45:34That was brilliant.
0:45:34 > 0:45:37Lads, we've got some good news and some bad news.
0:45:37 > 0:45:40The good news is you have won the prizes. What we have done is,
0:45:40 > 0:45:43we've filled your fridge full of booze and food.
0:45:43 > 0:45:45Yay! Well done, fellas!
0:45:48 > 0:45:51But there is some bad news. There's bad news, guys,
0:45:51 > 0:45:55and that is that we only bought girlfriend-appropriate food
0:45:55 > 0:45:58so mainly its rose wine, organic salad, cottage cheese,
0:45:58 > 0:46:00tears, oestrogen, self-loathing,
0:46:00 > 0:46:03a Bridget Jones DVD. "Why are men bastards? I hate him, Kelly!"
0:46:03 > 0:46:06So congratulations, boys. Thanks for taking part.
0:46:06 > 0:46:09Let's hear it for Ethan, Alex, Rob and Ca in Cardiff!
0:46:09 > 0:46:11APPLAUSE
0:46:11 > 0:46:14There's more We Know Where You Live throughout the series,
0:46:14 > 0:46:18- and who knows? It might involve you! - Ooh!
0:46:18 > 0:46:20How normal are you?
0:46:20 > 0:46:22Are you quirky, boring or completely gaga?
0:46:22 > 0:46:25Check out Britain Unzipped on the BBC Three website
0:46:25 > 0:46:29and by answering our questions, find out how your social life,
0:46:29 > 0:46:32work life and even sex life compare to the rest of Britain.
0:46:32 > 0:46:35We'll provide you with a personalised report.
0:46:35 > 0:46:38You can either share it with friends or keep it as our little secret.
0:46:38 > 0:46:42Just go to bbc.co.uk/bbcthree
0:46:42 > 0:46:45and click on Britain Unzipped.
0:46:54 > 0:46:57We've learned a lot about what you lot get up to out there
0:46:57 > 0:47:00but now it's time to dive into the murky water of celebrity,
0:47:00 > 0:47:03and who better to guide us than the lovely Holly Willoughby?
0:47:03 > 0:47:05APPLAUSE
0:47:06 > 0:47:10Holly, it's time to find out what you know about your fellow celebs.
0:47:10 > 0:47:12This is our Celebs Unzipped board.
0:47:14 > 0:47:17Ah. As you can see, there are 8/9 beautiful celebrity faces
0:47:17 > 0:47:21staring down at you from the board. Holly will pick one of the squares,
0:47:21 > 0:47:23answer a question on the celebrity featured,
0:47:23 > 0:47:27and all the questions are of course related to the stats we've uncovered.
0:47:27 > 0:47:29Yeah, if you get five questions right,
0:47:29 > 0:47:34you win something for everyone in tonight's studio audience.
0:47:34 > 0:47:36AUDIENCE CHEERS
0:47:38 > 0:47:41It was easy to decide what, because according to the Unzipped report,
0:47:41 > 0:47:44it's Britain's favourite alcoholic drink.
0:47:44 > 0:47:46Tonight's star prize for everyone is beer!
0:47:46 > 0:47:48CHEERING
0:47:48 > 0:47:49Beer!
0:47:49 > 0:47:53I'll do my best. I'll do my best.
0:47:53 > 0:47:55But, Holly, if you get five wrong,
0:47:55 > 0:47:57then nobody wins a drink
0:47:57 > 0:47:59so will it be booze for the audience
0:47:59 > 0:48:01or "boos" for Holly?
0:48:01 > 0:48:02- Ahh...- Classic.
0:48:02 > 0:48:03So please can we have
0:48:03 > 0:48:07some over-the-top and unnecessary dramatic music, please.
0:48:07 > 0:48:09UNNECESSARY DRAMATIC MUSIC
0:48:09 > 0:48:10Rely on her.
0:48:10 > 0:48:12(FALSETTO) # It's my turn to talk!
0:48:12 > 0:48:14BOTH: # Yeah!
0:48:15 > 0:48:18I am going to go for Jon Snow, please.
0:48:18 > 0:48:20OK, Jon Snow.
0:48:22 > 0:48:24- OK, Holly!- Yep.- We asked Jon Snow,
0:48:24 > 0:48:27"How much money would you accept to have your little toe chopped off?"
0:48:27 > 0:48:30What do you think he said?
0:48:30 > 0:48:32Do you think Jon Snow said £500
0:48:32 > 0:48:33or £50,000?
0:48:33 > 0:48:36So he agreed on a price, then?
0:48:36 > 0:48:37He did agree. He did agree.
0:48:37 > 0:48:39- Um...- And then we chopped it.
0:48:39 > 0:48:41- 50,000!- Yeah, I think 50.
0:48:41 > 0:48:42- 50!- 50!
0:48:42 > 0:48:44- What do you reckon?- 50.
0:48:44 > 0:48:45£50,000. Let's have a look.
0:48:47 > 0:48:51The lowest amount of money I'd have to have my little toe chopped off,
0:48:51 > 0:48:53you don't fall over without your little toe
0:48:53 > 0:48:54but it'd be a bit unsightly.
0:48:54 > 0:48:57Still, I'd go for 50,000 quid.
0:48:57 > 0:49:00Hey!
0:49:00 > 0:49:02That is one done.
0:49:02 > 0:49:06You are a fifth of the way to Beer City. What's your next choice?
0:49:06 > 0:49:09I am going to go for Sinitta.
0:49:11 > 0:49:12We asked Sinitta,
0:49:12 > 0:49:15"What's your recurring nightmare?"
0:49:15 > 0:49:20But did she say it's a jungle-based creepy-crawly
0:49:20 > 0:49:23or one about a celebrity with a huge ego?
0:49:23 > 0:49:26AUDIENCE LAUGHS
0:49:26 > 0:49:29- Hmm. Who could that be? - Could it be...?
0:49:29 > 0:49:30- A!- A!
0:49:30 > 0:49:32- What do you reckon?- Yeah, I think...
0:49:32 > 0:49:36- A!- Yeah, I think after the fuss that she made when she was in the jungle,
0:49:36 > 0:49:40I think she would have to say A, the creepy-crawly jungle thing.
0:49:40 > 0:49:42- Let's have a look and see if you're right, babe.- OK.
0:49:44 > 0:49:47My recurring nightmare is being at a dinner party
0:49:47 > 0:49:49sat next to Chris Moyles.
0:49:53 > 0:49:54That was a bit naughty, wasn't it?
0:49:54 > 0:49:59Oh! Imagine if Chris Moyles was in the jungle with her!
0:49:59 > 0:50:00She'd have never recovered.
0:50:00 > 0:50:03All right, pick another one please, Holly?
0:50:03 > 0:50:06- Let's go Rizzle Kicks.- Rizzle Kicks.
0:50:06 > 0:50:09Listen carefully to this song by Rizzle Kicks. Listen to the lyrics.
0:50:09 > 0:50:11# Yeah, the other day
0:50:11 > 0:50:14# I was sitting on the train but in another place
0:50:14 > 0:50:17# I was on my way home But maybe some would say
0:50:17 > 0:50:20# I was thinking 'bout the days I want to run away
0:50:20 > 0:50:22# I've only really got a couple mates
0:50:22 > 0:50:24# Me, myself and I
0:50:24 > 0:50:26# How cliche... #
0:50:26 > 0:50:29- That is the street speaking right there.- Yeah!
0:50:29 > 0:50:32OK. In the words of Rizzle Kicks,
0:50:32 > 0:50:37- "I've only really got a couple of mates, me myself and I."- Yeah.
0:50:37 > 0:50:40But when we asked people how many real friends they have,
0:50:40 > 0:50:43what percentage said they didn't have any?
0:50:43 > 0:50:45OK, no real friends.
0:50:45 > 0:50:49- It's so sad, that one, isn't it? - Was it 1% or was it 10%?
0:50:49 > 0:50:51- No!- What do you reckon? 1% or 10%.
0:50:51 > 0:50:54- It's only one! No!- One!- Ten!
0:50:54 > 0:50:57- What do you reckon?- Ten!
0:50:57 > 0:51:00AUDIENCE SHOUTS
0:51:00 > 0:51:02Do you know what? I think one thing
0:51:02 > 0:51:05but the majority of this audience are saying ten,
0:51:05 > 0:51:07so I'm taking my own little census,
0:51:07 > 0:51:10so I'm going to go for 10%, but that breaks my heart!
0:51:10 > 0:51:13OK, you'll go for 10. Let's find out what the answer is.
0:51:13 > 0:51:15It is 10!
0:51:20 > 0:51:21One-two.
0:51:21 > 0:51:24If you are playing along at home, you're playing alone.
0:51:24 > 0:51:28- Aw!- OK, three more for the beer. - Pick one, Hol, what do you want?
0:51:28 > 0:51:30So we need three more? OK. Doctor Who chap.
0:51:30 > 0:51:34- The mystery man? - You're going for the mystery celeb?
0:51:34 > 0:51:37- Oh. No.- What? - Who's Doctor Who? That's Greg.
0:51:39 > 0:51:42What, this?
0:51:42 > 0:51:44LAUGHTER
0:51:44 > 0:51:46That's not you!
0:51:46 > 0:51:47Wow.
0:51:47 > 0:51:51- That's amazing.- Who's that? Hang on! - Holly didn't recognise Greg
0:51:51 > 0:51:52even though she's in front of him!
0:51:52 > 0:51:54No, no, no!
0:51:54 > 0:51:57You look like David Tennant in that picture!
0:51:57 > 0:52:00- Doesn't that look like David Tennant?- Yes!- Thank you!
0:52:00 > 0:52:01I'll take that as a compliment.
0:52:01 > 0:52:05Greg, get over here. You look like a 40-year-old actor.
0:52:05 > 0:52:08But I will show you my sonic screwdriver later.
0:52:08 > 0:52:10The Greg question. We asked Greg
0:52:10 > 0:52:14who would he choose as his celebrity mum?
0:52:14 > 0:52:16- But how did he answer?- Oh. Hmm.
0:52:17 > 0:52:21Did he choose Barbara Windsor
0:52:21 > 0:52:23or Hilary Devey?
0:52:24 > 0:52:27- Hilary!- Barbara!- Hilary!
0:52:30 > 0:52:32No, I'm going to go, I'm going to go...
0:52:32 > 0:52:33Barbara!
0:52:33 > 0:52:36- I'm going to go with Barbara. - You're going with Barbara Windsor?
0:52:36 > 0:52:39So Greg, whose favourite show is Dragon's Den
0:52:39 > 0:52:40and talks about Hilary Devey,
0:52:40 > 0:52:44you think his celebrity mum would be Barbara Windsor. You're sure?
0:52:44 > 0:52:46- No.- Really?
0:52:46 > 0:52:49When I said Barbara, I meant Hilary.
0:52:50 > 0:52:53Let's find out, who's Greg's celebrity mum?
0:52:53 > 0:52:54It was Hilary Devey.
0:52:56 > 0:52:57I love her.
0:52:57 > 0:53:00- I'm so sorry.- I do love her.
0:53:00 > 0:53:03- Greg, why? Why do you love Hilary so much?- Why Hilary?
0:53:03 > 0:53:04Um, because,
0:53:04 > 0:53:07(DEEP THROATY VOICE) Just basically, she can be like
0:53:07 > 0:53:10your mum and your dad at the same time!
0:53:10 > 0:53:12You know what I mean?
0:53:12 > 0:53:14You'd send her to school if there was trouble.
0:53:14 > 0:53:15I'd send her everywhere!
0:53:15 > 0:53:18OK, could we go for David Cameron, please?
0:53:18 > 0:53:19OK.
0:53:19 > 0:53:21Right, David Cameron.
0:53:21 > 0:53:24So, we asked the great British public this question.
0:53:24 > 0:53:28Who is your ideal Prime Minister? But what was their answer?
0:53:28 > 0:53:29Was it
0:53:29 > 0:53:31Stephen Fry
0:53:31 > 0:53:32or Jeremy Clarkson?
0:53:32 > 0:53:35- Stephen Fry!- Stephen Fry.- Yeah?
0:53:35 > 0:53:37- Stephen Fry.- OK. Let's find out.
0:53:37 > 0:53:39Obviously Stephen Fry.
0:53:39 > 0:53:41APPLAUSE
0:53:41 > 0:53:43We need one more for the beer.
0:53:43 > 0:53:47- OK, OK, one more.- So 31% of the country chose Stephen Fry.
0:53:47 > 0:53:49Only 26% picked Jeremy Clarkson.
0:53:49 > 0:53:52He'd make an awesome Prime Minister. He could give you interesting facts
0:53:52 > 0:53:55about clouds when he's in Parliament. One more.
0:53:55 > 0:53:57I'm going to go for the mystery one, please.
0:53:57 > 0:53:59Choose the mystery celeb. Ooh!
0:53:59 > 0:54:04OK. we asked women this question.
0:54:04 > 0:54:07Which movie character do you try and live your life like?
0:54:07 > 0:54:11But what was the most popular answer? Was it Bridget Jones...
0:54:11 > 0:54:15- Oh, that's so hard! - Or that bloke from Sex In The City?
0:54:15 > 0:54:16LAUGHTER
0:54:16 > 0:54:17No idea.
0:54:19 > 0:54:21What do you think, Hol?
0:54:21 > 0:54:24- See, I think this really splits woman.- It did.
0:54:24 > 0:54:25There's one type...
0:54:25 > 0:54:27AUDIENCE SHOUTS
0:54:27 > 0:54:29- What do you reckon? - There's no split!
0:54:29 > 0:54:30- Bridget!- All right, Bridget.
0:54:30 > 0:54:32- "There's no split!" - All right, Bridget.
0:54:32 > 0:54:35OK. I'll take that. Let's see which movie character
0:54:35 > 0:54:38British woman would most like to be like.
0:54:38 > 0:54:39Bridget Jones!
0:54:44 > 0:54:48And that is it. That is correct, which means you've won.
0:54:48 > 0:54:51Come over and join us, Holly. Come over, come over, come over.
0:54:51 > 0:54:53So congratulations and thank you to everyone.
0:54:53 > 0:54:55Everyone here tonight wins a beer!
0:54:55 > 0:54:57AUDIENCE CHEERS
0:54:57 > 0:55:00But be careful. Don't be that 43% of British people
0:55:00 > 0:55:02who get so drunk they vomit in the street.
0:55:02 > 0:55:04- That would be not very fun. - Or on a willy.
0:55:04 > 0:55:06That's all we've time for on Britain Unzipped.
0:55:06 > 0:55:10A massive thank you to our special guest, Holly Willoughby.
0:55:10 > 0:55:12APPLAUSE Thank you to the lads in Cardiff,
0:55:12 > 0:55:14plus Sam, Eloise, Eloise's mum Tina.
0:55:14 > 0:55:17We'll be back next week with more weird and wonderful results
0:55:17 > 0:55:20- from our reports.- Until then, you can go online any time
0:55:20 > 0:55:22and complete your own Unzipped report
0:55:22 > 0:55:25and see how normal you are. Just go to bbc.co.uk/bbcthree
0:55:25 > 0:55:27and click on Britain Unzipped.
0:55:27 > 0:55:30Thank you for watching, and see you next time. Goodbye!
0:55:30 > 0:55:31Goodbye!
0:55:31 > 0:55:33APPLAUSE
0:55:57 > 0:56:00Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd