:00:12. > :00:15.Hi, here's our look at the top stories in 60 seconds.
:00:15. > :00:18.A spectacular Jubilee flypast at Buckingham Palace. Thousands
:00:18. > :00:21.gathered to see the Queen and other Royals on the balcony. Prince
:00:21. > :00:24.Phillip was missing - he remains in hospital.
:00:24. > :00:27.The Queen broadcast a special message to mark the end of the
:00:27. > :00:30.four-day celebrations. She thanked all those who attended and
:00:30. > :00:33.organised it. She called it a humbling experience.
:00:33. > :00:37.There's been an outbreak of Legionnaires' disease in Edinburgh.
:00:37. > :00:39.One person has died and 15 others are critically ill. Officials are
:00:39. > :00:42.trying to find the source. Victory for Scotland's rugby
:00:42. > :00:47.players in Australia. Greg Laidlaw's penalty won it with the
:00:47. > :00:50.final kick of the game. It's their first Test win there for 30 years.
:00:50. > :00:53.Last night he was rocking the Royals - now Sir Paul McCartney's
:00:53. > :00:58.looking at the Olympics. He's confirmed he's the final act
:00:58. > :01:08.playing at the Opening Ceremony. That's on July 27th.
:01:08. > :01:30.
:01:30. > :01:38.We're back in an hour - keep it This programme contains some strong
:01:38. > :01:43.language. We asked 500 unusual questions to thousands of British
:01:43. > :01:48.people. The answers to those questions make up the Britain
:01:48. > :01:57.Unzipped Report. Previously with the help of our guests we have got
:01:57. > :02:03.drunk, we have got smooshy. We have got down. We have got into trouble
:02:03. > :02:08.at school and we even got a makeover. That is suppose b toe me?
:02:08. > :02:13.Tonight we are joined by Chelsee Healey and Joe Swash and catch up
:02:13. > :02:23.with some old mates who find out who our friends really are. This is
:02:23. > :02:45.
:02:45. > :02:55.Britain Unzipped! Oh my God, he Welcome to Britain Unzipped. This
:02:55. > :02:55.
:02:55. > :03:00.is Russell Kane! And this is my co- host, hashtag Greg James! Strap
:03:00. > :03:05.yourself in, because we're set for another joy ride around British
:03:05. > :03:10.behaviour. But let me afully handbrake to that thought Greg!
:03:10. > :03:20.Because I have got some bad news. This is the last episode in the
:03:20. > :03:27.series! AUDIENCE BOOS. Due to a mix up, the Director General of the BBC
:03:27. > :03:35.accidentally saw some of the play - - show on the iPlayer. Well Greg is
:03:35. > :03:41.busy with his radio show.Ive Week Tay, 4 to 7. He is busy, so good
:03:41. > :03:46.for Greg. You have the corporate in Norwich. But we're not going to go
:03:46. > :03:56.without with a wircher, not when our special guest is Chelsee
:03:56. > :04:01.
:04:01. > :04:08.Healey! -- with a whimper. Hi. How are you? I'm good. Welcome. How you
:04:08. > :04:12.doing. I'm good. You're look sog hot, I will get sun burnt from you.
:04:12. > :04:17.You have answered the questions, how did you find them? Interesting
:04:17. > :04:22.and fun. I enjoyed it. Were they personal, would you describe
:04:22. > :04:28.yourself as open or secretive? Secretive. Depending on what it's
:04:28. > :04:32.about. A lot of it will be about shagging, I won't lie. We will find
:04:32. > :04:37.out babes, strap in. Chelsee's facing our normality questions, but
:04:37. > :04:44.facing our normality questions, but we have other big questions such as.
:04:44. > :04:49.What percentage of us have taken revenge on an ex. And how have we
:04:49. > :04:55.dragged this out for six episodes. We will talk about friendship and
:04:55. > :05:02.getting to know each other. And we have the help of our amazing studio
:05:02. > :05:06.audience. Plus we hear from the sort of friends who gets into
:05:06. > :05:12.trouble, the Zipped Sample and we will use them to answer queps like
:05:12. > :05:19.this. How many of you have a friend who you regularly have sex with
:05:19. > :05:24.with. An F buddie? Only one guy bangs a friend. Is that your own
:05:24. > :05:32.arm after you have slept on it. I haven't seen you for a while.
:05:33. > :05:36.check out the other good stuff. Only on Britain Unzipped. Men and
:05:36. > :05:44.women inUnzipped. Who will emerge the winner from our battle of the
:05:44. > :05:48.sexes. This week with an elderly man a superstar and a surprise.
:05:48. > :05:54.Students unzipped. We're off to meet up with six housemate and
:05:54. > :06:02.persuade them to swap revision for the dance floor. Celebs Unzipped.
:06:02. > :06:09.Joe Swash will be here. But first up it is the star of Waterloo Road
:06:09. > :06:16.and Strictly Come Dancing, Miss Chelsee Healey. Welcome to the show.
:06:16. > :06:23.Where have you been all our lives? Waiting for you. Both of us? Yes.
:06:23. > :06:28.What are are you up to I have finished Waterloo road. What you
:06:28. > :06:33.mean you have finished. I'm down forever. Are you still doing
:06:33. > :06:37.dancing? The only dancing I have been up to is in the club. I'd love
:06:37. > :06:44.to keep it up. But I don't have the time to rehearse and if we did
:06:44. > :06:49.rehearse, where would I dance. could rehearse and then dance on
:06:49. > :06:54.the dance floor. It is embarrassing. If we asked your friends and family
:06:54. > :06:59.how normal you are, what would say they? Would probably say I'm not
:06:59. > :07:07.all there. We will find out now. Because Chelsee, these are your
:07:07. > :07:11.normality questions. Good luck. First, would you have plastic
:07:11. > :07:17.surgery. Yes. Why mess with perfection? If I was old and I
:07:17. > :07:22.wasn't happy with me sagy face I would get a face lift and a boob
:07:22. > :07:28.reduction. Reduction? Why? Because I feel that my assets are too big
:07:28. > :07:34.for my body. I'm so turned on with the word assets. You would get them
:07:34. > :07:42.made smaller. That is the recession. Everyone's suffering. Double dip
:07:43. > :07:48.mate, double dip! 68% of women would have plastic surgery, but
:07:48. > :07:58.only 4% would get a boob reduction. I would have an ego reduction.
:07:58. > :08:08.you ever worn a cos suem -- costume for sex? Yes? My mum's going to
:08:08. > :08:09.
:08:09. > :08:16.watch this. What did you wear a Morrisons outfit. No I wore a bin
:08:16. > :08:26.bag on me head. I'm joking. But I was turned on. We have a photo of
:08:26. > :08:29.
:08:29. > :08:34.it. Let's look. Ooh! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE. Can you explain why you
:08:34. > :08:40.are dressed like that I was doing slichtly and each week we had to do
:08:40. > :08:46.a VT and they would dress up me up as Shrek, because we were dancing
:08:46. > :08:51.the Shrek. That is not normal. dress up isn't normal? To dress up
:08:51. > :08:58.is normal, or you would be naked. Do you want anything from Tescos?
:08:58. > :09:05.Yes, but put your knob away. Only 31% of women have worn a costume
:09:05. > :09:13.during sex. What do you sleep in? Naked. Underwear. All of it. Just
:09:13. > :09:17.one bit. Just one bit. Just the bottoms. You know, I always wear
:09:17. > :09:21.pants in bed. Even if there has been a night of passion and we're
:09:21. > :09:31.falling asleep. I will sneak a pair on before I fall asleep. Because
:09:31. > :09:31.
:09:31. > :09:38.aifr fear of wake up and then seeing the truth of the acorn. Just
:09:38. > :09:43.thought I would share that. It is not an acorn though, shit, move on!
:09:43. > :09:49.Only 21% of women sleep in their underwear. I'm surprised. There is
:09:49. > :09:55.something else you take to bed. Apart from your panties. You sleep
:09:55. > :10:02.with Nicola every night. Yes. That is me blanket. You have 5 comfort
:10:02. > :10:08.blankets. Like babies have? Yes. Where did it start from. Had a
:10:08. > :10:18.dummy and me mum took it off me and my sister told know stuck my ee--
:10:18. > :10:22.suck my thumb. If I had a reman tick girl and she was -- romantic
:10:22. > :10:27.night with a girl and she was sucking her thumb I would think
:10:27. > :10:36.there was something wrong. But I have my little Greg comfort blanket.
:10:36. > :10:43.Is that after you went on a date with Ryan? Bastard clam Do you have
:10:43. > :10:49.-- bastard!. Do you have unusual personal habits. I wash my hands.
:10:49. > :10:53.You're mental? If there a is a tap I will wash my hands. Just walk
:10:53. > :10:59.past. In B&Q you're stuck. Where does that come from? I don't know,
:10:59. > :11:06.just getting germs. Only 7% of women have come pulsive hygiene
:11:06. > :11:16.habits. It is usually the boys. Those are the end of your normality
:11:16. > :11:23.questions. Thank you. Chelsee we can give you an rating compared to
:11:23. > :11:33.previous female guests. The options are normal, odd/Christine Bleakley
:11:33. > :11:35.
:11:35. > :11:41.and Charles Brooks. Weird, insane and finally danger to society.
:11:41. > :11:45.people who have only just start watching, WTF guys. We should
:11:45. > :11:50.clarify Holly and Christine's normality ratings were nothing to
:11:50. > :11:57.do with the answer they give when we asked them if they would watch a
:11:57. > :12:02.sex video watch -- with Phillip Schofield. But they both said yes.
:12:02. > :12:06.It has come to my attention your tawdry show has been spreading
:12:06. > :12:10.gossip about my involvement in video of a sexual nature. I have
:12:10. > :12:15.spoken to my legal team and instructed them to take action
:12:15. > :12:22.should these rumours continue. That is not such good news is it Russell
:12:22. > :12:26.Howard? Oh him. Oh he is not so half so funny and gres James, one
:12:26. > :12:36.more peep and you will be back to student radio like that. And one
:12:36. > :12:38.
:12:38. > :12:48.other thing. I want those tapes back by tomorrow morning! Sorry
:12:48. > :12:51.
:12:51. > :12:56.uncle Phillip! Now you are bonkers. # Bonkers! The hunt for Britain's
:12:56. > :13:00.weirdest celebrity is nearly over. But that could change if clelz does
:13:00. > :13:06.anything outrageous tonight. -- Chelsee. We will announce the
:13:06. > :13:13.winner of this award in a glittering ceremony broadcast live
:13:13. > :13:23.in a sit down Wimpy attend of the show. That is a genuine Wimpyburger
:13:23. > :13:26.
:13:26. > :13:31.by the way. It is not what Greg does with Chris moilz! -- Moyles.
:13:31. > :13:41.Whatever happens, it is not too late to find out how thormal you
:13:41. > :13:45.
:13:45. > :13:49.are. Go to web-site. -- find out Now time the link up with our
:13:49. > :13:57.Unzipped cameras. During the series we have been to Cardiff, Liverpool
:13:57. > :14:03.and Essex. Tonight, we're off to Wendy Wendy Camden Town in swinging
:14:03. > :14:11.London. Don't do that again. we're talking about friends, where
:14:11. > :14:18.better to go than to university. Where friendsships with be formed.:
:14:18. > :14:23.Or strangled at birth with things like Rizlas and skidmarks. And we
:14:23. > :14:33.meet some housemate and we should be able to join up with them now.
:14:33. > :14:33.
:14:33. > :14:43.It is a Mews Terrace. They have legs. And they have stairs. The old
:14:43. > :14:49.
:14:49. > :14:56.stairs. Lads. Welcome guys. Thank you for inviting us over. Cheers.
:14:56. > :15:02.Absolutely buzzing. So well Wyn introduce everyone. I'm from
:15:02. > :15:07.Liverpool. I'm Welwin. Kumar, he is from India and he does maths. Joe
:15:07. > :15:14.from London. He does audiology. Yad from London. He is economics. Rosh
:15:14. > :15:24.from London, does IT. And finally Lux from London. He does
:15:24. > :15:25.
:15:25. > :15:29.theoretical physics. Take that There are four times more likely to
:15:29. > :15:37.argue with a friend than women. What is your biggest argument?
:15:37. > :15:47.After a night out, one of has dropped some flavoured sauce onto
:15:47. > :15:48.
:15:48. > :15:58.his polo and he went crazy and locked himself in his room! Shisha
:15:58. > :16:00.
:16:00. > :16:05.Flavour? Is that some horrible euphemism? What happened was, I
:16:05. > :16:15.fell off the stage. We will set you a challenge. Can we have a sniff
:16:15. > :16:20.
:16:20. > :16:24.around? Welwin. That is how we say -- how we said victory in Essex.
:16:24. > :16:30.That house is quite motionless. I cannot leave unless my bed has been
:16:30. > :16:40.fully met. That is protein. I bet there is more protein in that
:16:40. > :16:44.
:16:44. > :16:54.duvet! Down we go. Down the stairs. Where are we going? Oh! Why? Here
:16:54. > :16:57.
:16:58. > :17:05.is an idea, just pick stuff up! What is at around the edge? Filth?
:17:05. > :17:15.Shampoo. Just shampoo...! That is disgusting. Why are you holding at
:17:15. > :17:24.
:17:24. > :17:31.Ten was? I want to play a song. Away you go... HE PLAYS TERRIBLY.
:17:31. > :17:38.think he is having a a break down! That is what happens when six men
:17:38. > :17:42.do not hold any sex for a very long time. He or doing very intelligent
:17:42. > :17:52.degrees, which is why be were surprised when we discovered when
:17:52. > :18:14.
:18:14. > :18:21.you are not revising, you are doing # ELECTRIC SIX: GAY BAR. APPLAUSE.
:18:21. > :18:24.I mean, that is pretty impressive. Why did you start making us videos?
:18:24. > :18:29.A you were getting bored but revision and we wanted to relax so
:18:29. > :18:36.we wanted to go crazy. Thank you so much. Only so much mathematics you
:18:36. > :18:43.can do! As is the last episode, we have a challenge for you. And that
:18:43. > :18:53.is to end our series with your first-ever live performance.
:18:53. > :18:54.
:18:54. > :19:00.Lad's... Bearing in mind you're loved -- our love of shots! That
:19:00. > :19:10.never gets old... We'd love to end tonight with some LMFAO. Do you
:19:10. > :19:21.
:19:21. > :19:25.accept the challenge? AN ounce. APPLAUSE. -- SILENCE. We accept it!
:19:25. > :19:33.We'll be back at the end of the show to see how you've got on.
:19:33. > :19:36.students! Man Versus Woman is up next, but before that it's time for
:19:36. > :19:45.one final trip into the strange world of Russell's mind as he
:19:45. > :19:50.explores friendship. Friends, only 34% of us would rather hang out
:19:50. > :19:53.with our friends and her family. Does that mean the other 66% are
:19:53. > :20:00.those irritating people who actually get on with their parents?
:20:00. > :20:07.My mother and my sister, we go partying together. Do you want to
:20:07. > :20:11.come in and take some baroque? of you horrible bastards would
:20:11. > :20:21.actually encourage a friend to do something that they would feel at.
:20:21. > :20:26.
:20:26. > :20:32.Like this MC... Oh, gosh! Wanker! On another note, 47% of your
:20:32. > :20:41.friends to not be won toss about your holiday romances. It was
:20:41. > :20:47.amazing. He went to Africa. Brown person. Random! 25% of people feel
:20:47. > :20:56.that they could actually murder somebody. How? These are my friends.
:20:56. > :21:02.A why would anybody eat carbohydrates? I'm a vegetarian.
:21:02. > :21:08.Where is my hammer? Who really are our friends? For the 75% that have
:21:08. > :21:14.a best friend, are you absolutely sure they are your best friend back.
:21:14. > :21:18.And girls are much more likely to gay off with their best friend?
:21:18. > :21:23.get really drunk and we started kissing. It was actually really
:21:23. > :21:33.nice. You don't hear that quite as much with blokes... It was a great
:21:33. > :21:37.
:21:37. > :21:40.night. After about it laagers, I endured dear. -- I entered dave.
:21:40. > :21:43.Welcome to Man Versus Woman, the competition which will decide, once
:21:43. > :21:45.and for all, who's best. Men or women? Unfortunately, the
:21:45. > :21:48.competition has been virtually non- existent because women are
:21:48. > :21:50.currently leading men 5-0. So to even things up, we're playing
:21:50. > :21:53.double or quits tonight and we've persuaded one of the most
:21:53. > :21:55.testosterone-fuelled men in Western Europe to take part. Representing
:21:55. > :22:00.men this week, he's from Essex, he's single, he's definitely not
:22:00. > :22:10.lonely and is very happy with just his cats and a pug for company.
:22:10. > :22:18.
:22:18. > :22:22.It's Russell! And I am straight as well. And representing women this
:22:22. > :22:25.week, she's 22, she's got a degree and when asked if she'd prefer to
:22:25. > :22:27.do a bungee jump or skydive, she said, skydive because at least
:22:27. > :22:34.you'd die with someone alongside you. It's Lauren! Welcome to the
:22:34. > :22:40.show. Where are you from? Sheffield. What do you do? I work
:22:40. > :22:49.for insuring company. A yes? Your dream job? I want to be at Disney
:22:49. > :22:59.wedding planner. Is that an actual job? He isn't, I will create one to
:22:59. > :23:01.
:23:01. > :23:05.do that. Barnett's Dock organiser at autumn Towers? I am going to
:23:05. > :23:08.tell you three things about yourself. It's will be different a
:23:08. > :23:12.rehearsal and I will be stitched up. These are based and the fact that
:23:12. > :23:22.you are no meal from the south-east of England to loves cats. As we can
:23:22. > :23:26.
:23:26. > :23:30.see... It is a new photograph! look like I have formed a religion
:23:30. > :23:37.around cats are! Compared to the rest of the population you're: More
:23:37. > :23:43.likely to lie about how much sex you have. Do you want it to
:23:43. > :23:53.respond? Well, I bang hundreds, so... More likely to pay for porn
:23:53. > :23:56.
:23:56. > :24:02.online. No! I do not know how my got stuck down. Easter Rising these
:24:02. > :24:07.girlie cliches. The prizes include a hot-water bottle, candle, feather
:24:08. > :24:10.boa and a bottle of medium dry white wine and some tissues.
:24:10. > :24:16.Russell, you'll be choosing from this selection of completely
:24:16. > :24:22.arbritary prizes that were not chosen with you in mind at all. The
:24:22. > :24:25.BBC's taste and decency guidelines, a cat's for lonely men calendar. A
:24:25. > :24:32.six-week residential therapy course concentrating on esteem issues and
:24:32. > :24:38.a blow-up girlfriend. And she's dressed in men's clothes. Just in
:24:38. > :24:45.case. Ahead of us we've got some questions all about the differences
:24:45. > :24:51.between men and women, so let's get started. What most women choose to
:24:51. > :24:57.travel backwards or forwards in time? Think... Chelsee? Forwards.
:24:57. > :25:07.Why? All this go forwards and never back. Would you change something?
:25:07. > :25:17.Know. All right. Time up. What do you have? Backwards. Lauren?
:25:17. > :25:18.
:25:18. > :25:27.Forwards. I can reveal that 69% of women would go backwards. 69% of
:25:28. > :25:33.women. Which means, Russell, you have won that round! I am not
:25:33. > :25:43.playing any more. Why? The because I am missing. You could go back in
:25:43. > :25:45.
:25:46. > :25:52.time and change the result! Lauren, I've heard that you're a massive
:25:52. > :25:58.Britney Spears fan and actually met her last year. I got on stage with
:25:58. > :26:04.her at Manchester Arena. I hassled security. Re D? Did you dance?
:26:04. > :26:08.jumped up and down. Seeing as Britney is back in the news after
:26:08. > :26:18.being chosen as a judge on X Factor USA, who would like to watch a
:26:18. > :26:45.
:26:45. > :26:55.classic Britney video? This will # Oh baby. How was I supposed to
:26:55. > :26:55.
:26:55. > :27:04.know? That something wasn't right... Old baby, baby... I should not have
:27:04. > :27:13.let you go... Now you are right outside. Show me how you wanted to
:27:13. > :27:20.be. Tell me, baby, because I need to know now, because... My
:27:20. > :27:27.loneliness... Is killing me... I must confess... I still believe.
:27:27. > :27:37.Still believe! When I'm not with you, I lose my mind. Give me a
:27:37. > :27:42.
:27:42. > :27:49.sign... Hit me baby, one more time! APPLAUSE. Did you like that?
:27:49. > :27:55.prefer you. Maybe. There was some stubble next to the pigtails.
:27:55. > :27:59.that make you feel confused? The next question... Days, what
:27:59. > :28:09.percentage of British men think men are funnier than women. Write down
:28:09. > :28:11.
:28:11. > :28:19.your answers. On the blokes can be funny. All done? OK... Lauren?
:28:19. > :28:26.I have gone for 85%. Depressing comment. I can now reveal that 71%
:28:26. > :28:30.of men think men are funnier. Russell when sat round again! But
:28:30. > :28:34.only 31% of women thought men were funnier. That is the perfect
:28:34. > :28:36.statistic for me to go and further investigate. In fact, as a stand-up
:28:36. > :28:46.comedian myself, who better to interrogate the British public
:28:46. > :28:49.about such a controversial subject? Greg, pass me my microphone. What
:28:49. > :28:57.are you doing? You can't just wander off-set to interview people
:28:57. > :29:01.again. Why not? Firstly, because you're a contestant and secondly,
:29:01. > :29:05.because we all know this interview is staged and is just a sad ruse to
:29:05. > :29:12.get a cheap laugh. My walk is an integral part of the show. People
:29:12. > :29:15.are tweeting with hashtag Russell's walk. This deserves serious
:29:15. > :29:18.investigations so why hire a film crew and travel the length and
:29:18. > :29:28.breadth of the UK to canvass a huge cross section of the population.
:29:28. > :29:48.
:29:48. > :29:55.And trust me, I left no stone Amen funnier than women? No... Yes!
:29:55. > :30:05.Pathetic. Is it? Back to the game... In a dramatic break from tradition,
:30:05. > :30:10.
:30:10. > :30:20.instead of asking muscle to get a Russell, step this way. It is time
:30:20. > :30:28.
:30:28. > :30:34.Russell has revealed sosm interesting differences in the
:30:34. > :30:40.answers between me -- men and women. But how much of that can he
:30:40. > :30:44.remember? Is there anything in your brain except filth? Spunk. I will
:30:44. > :30:51.ask him some questions from previous editions of man versus
:30:51. > :30:59.woman and he needs to get within 10% of answer or face a Unzipped
:30:59. > :31:04.Forfeit. But in an attempt to create jeopardy, the producers have
:31:04. > :31:11.added a twist. If Russell gets within 10% of the answer, I will
:31:11. > :31:16.face the Unzipped Forfeit. Scotland! Russell's Claire of
:31:16. > :31:23.horror. Although it might be Greg. All the forfeits are related to
:31:24. > :31:32.friends of the show that have appeared on the show. The people
:31:32. > :31:36.involved will be revealed by Chelsee here. Hi. Hi. What a fit
:31:36. > :31:42.torturer. First question. What percentage of men would rather
:31:42. > :31:48.spend time with friends, rather than family? I know it was high. I
:31:48. > :31:58.remember remarking on how high it was. I'm going to go with 65%.
:31:58. > :32:06.
:32:07. > :32:16.The percentage is... 40%. Oh he's scared. The first forfeit is for
:32:17. > :32:18.
:32:18. > :32:28.you. Chelsee open the envelope. Lap dance from Bumbledore. Let's just
:32:28. > :32:42.
:32:42. > :32:52.remind ourselves who Bumbledore is. OK, let's do this thing -
:32:52. > :33:30.
:33:31. > :33:38.Urgh! Stop please! Thank you Bumbledore! Oh dear. That just was
:33:38. > :33:47.weird. That was so weird. Dare I ask for boner? That was the
:33:47. > :33:52.opposite of Viagra. Now the next one. Fucking right. My heart is
:33:52. > :34:01.like beating. So is mine. You're getting off on it from a distance.
:34:01. > :34:05.He was looking at me in the eye. He was going... Ha Ha! Now what
:34:05. > :34:14.percentage of women would lie to get someone into bed, can you
:34:14. > :34:19.remember? Not at all. I don't think it was high. 28%. 28. A that is a
:34:19. > :34:29.big moment. The percentage of women who would lie to get someone into
:34:29. > :34:40.
:34:40. > :34:49.bed is... Oh! Every time I try to do something, it goes wrong. Get in
:34:49. > :34:58.the chair, dick! Open the envelope. I can't get closer, because my
:34:58. > :35:08.electronic tag will go off. Oh no what is it. For you my friend, I
:35:08. > :35:11.
:35:11. > :35:21.have got a finger suck from Ryan. Now let's just remind ours who Ryan
:35:21. > :35:21.
:35:21. > :36:25.Apology for the loss of subtitles for 64 seconds
:36:25. > :36:35.That's how it feels! Thank you very much, Ryan, that was amazing!
:36:35. > :36:38.
:36:38. > :36:46.touch me. OK, next question. What's coming next? It is just a... Just a
:36:46. > :36:53.full on gang bang in my face. percentage of men think texting
:36:53. > :37:03.someone over than their partner is OK. I will go, because it is men,
:37:03. > :37:13.
:37:13. > :37:20.40%. The percentage is... 59%. Few! - phew! Shit the bed. That is four
:37:20. > :37:25.forfeit. I went to your house and chat in your bed. BBC Three! The
:37:25. > :37:35.final forfeit please. The final one? This will be the worst one.
:37:35. > :37:58.
:37:58. > :38:07.Full... Oh what? No! AUDIENCE: KISS KISS KISS! We can't! No! No! Oh my
:38:07. > :38:17.God, Greg rejected me! Don't hold hands. His hands are sweating. Has
:38:17. > :38:47.
:38:47. > :38:53.it been sucked by Ryan? Argh! Boner! That was weird. That was
:38:53. > :38:57.genuinely weird. I think it's time this game should end before any
:38:57. > :39:05.more harm is done. I have no idea what the final score was and
:39:05. > :39:11.frankly I don't care. Let's just say that Lauren wins. If you're
:39:11. > :39:16.planning a wedding, here is some advice. Don't expect an RSVP from
:39:16. > :39:21.that couple in the north-east of England, as 55% of them find
:39:21. > :39:24.weddings boring. Keep Scottish relatives into a minimum. 60% of
:39:24. > :39:30.them have punched someone in a fight and don't expect the bride to
:39:30. > :39:40.hand out many plus once, when asked whether they like any of their
:39:40. > :39:42.
:39:42. > :39:47.friends' partners, 40% said I don't and not, I do! Tonight we're
:39:47. > :39:51.talking about friends and enemies. And because of that, the Britain
:39:51. > :39:56.Unzipped production team offered us the chance to bring along a friend
:39:56. > :40:03.to be part of the show tonight. Who did you invite? My friends don't
:40:03. > :40:07.watch the show. They hate it. More a Midsomer Murders crew. Who did
:40:07. > :40:17.you invite? Wellless not so much a friend as a life partner or a
:40:17. > :40:18.
:40:18. > :40:28.future organ donor. Here is my other TV husband - Joe Swash!
:40:28. > :40:35.
:40:35. > :40:40.darling. It is the same Joe,ever time. I was watching and got
:40:40. > :40:46.jealous. I can confirm that was a tongue. Yes he pulled out. Welcome
:40:46. > :40:52.to our show. It is nice to have you here. Rus Sol sell I have an
:40:52. > :40:58.interview about what friendship means. Why don't you leave it to me.
:40:58. > :41:04.All right, don't get the hump. Get away Parky. Most of us may have
:41:04. > :41:09.hundred of Facebook friends, but on average we obl have - only have six
:41:09. > :41:16.people we call real friends. I have six good friends, but other people,
:41:16. > :41:20.I put up with them. Chelsee stkph have got about six. Have you got a
:41:20. > :41:27.best friend? No there is a couple of us have grown up together.
:41:27. > :41:33.you had to pick one, who is it? couldn't. You have to. No I don't
:41:33. > :41:38.want to. Otherwise the other one is going to die. No I couldn't pick.
:41:38. > :41:48.Russell. Thank you Greg. Someone whether might be getting more
:41:48. > :41:51.
:41:51. > :41:56.famous thanks to this show is back this week. It is Adam, everyone!
:41:56. > :42:02.Adam fits the profile identified by our report exact Liverpool he only
:42:02. > :42:06.has six real friends on Facebook. - - exactly. And he has broken all of
:42:06. > :42:15.their cocks. But we're talking about Adam, so there is not a
:42:15. > :42:20.simple or clean reason for this. had about 1,700 friends. On my
:42:20. > :42:24.Facebook. I was getting loads of weird requests off people. What do
:42:24. > :42:31.you mean? Selling underwear and socks that we had used and not
:42:31. > :42:37.washed. What else have you sent off? Just boxer shorts, and thing
:42:37. > :42:46.like that. How much would a pair of trackie bottoms cost me? About 40
:42:46. > :42:54.quid. There is a stranger one. Share with us. To piss on the
:42:54. > :43:04.trackie bottom set. And post it to them. I'd hate to be your post mab!
:43:04. > :43:05.
:43:05. > :43:09.Thank you. -- most r postman! Facebook is a mine field. Everyone
:43:09. > :43:17.does a bit of stalking. The issue is - would row still be friend with
:43:17. > :43:23.with an ex? No I'm not friends with my of my exs. Even if it ended on
:43:23. > :43:29.good terms. I would rather not. See you late ir. Catch you up. 16% of
:43:29. > :43:37.people have slept with their friend's partner. 16%. Oh no.
:43:37. > :43:42.That's... Naughty. That is a no, no? A very big one. That little
:43:42. > :43:46.face says otherwise. When I was younger maybe. I have grown up and
:43:46. > :43:56.learned morals and I would never do that. Ever! But you have done it.
:43:56. > :43:57.
:43:57. > :44:04.have done it, yeah. But I did tell him and he didn't mind. Any of you
:44:04. > :44:09.want to fess up to that? Both of you. What is your name? Gemma.
:44:09. > :44:16.happened. We met and became friends because Lucy slept with my
:44:16. > :44:21.boyfriend! What happened I just started seeing him and on the day I
:44:21. > :44:25.started see him. He broke up with Gemma. And then we became friends
:44:25. > :44:30.after she stalked me for a bit. While she was banging him you were
:44:30. > :44:34.following them around. You were in the star bucks across the road,
:44:34. > :44:42.going, I hope you're happy. I may have changed my route home from
:44:42. > :44:47.college and got the same bus. you reminisce about it? Yes. Do you
:44:47. > :44:57.ever exchange notes about what he was like in bed? No never. Do it
:44:57. > :44:58.
:44:58. > :45:02.now. Zipped Sample award yourself a round of applause. Chelsee and Dave
:45:02. > :45:09.thank you. We know enough about you to deal with an important moment.
:45:09. > :45:19.The presentation of Unzipped strangest celebrity award. Yes, the
:45:19. > :45:23.
:45:23. > :45:32.And the nominees for strangest female celebrity are: Chelsee
:45:32. > :45:37.Healey. Holly Willoughby. Emily Aytack from the Inbetweeners. And
:45:37. > :45:41.Pussycat Doll, Kimberly Wyatt. Chelsee, you performed well tonight
:45:41. > :45:46.and thank you for your honesty. But up against comments like this, I'm
:45:46. > :45:51.afraid you had no chance when it came to choosing the winner.
:45:51. > :45:57.friend's private sex video has been stolen and leaked. Do you watch it?
:45:57. > :46:01.Absolutely! Would you eat a human it's starving? The somebody asked
:46:01. > :46:10.this before I had kids I would say No But since having kids...
:46:10. > :46:17.decided to eat them? Nobody would ever find out... I would probably
:46:17. > :46:22.go into a cage in epithet and just dance naked for the whole night! --
:46:22. > :46:29.a beat that. Holly Willoughby is the first winner of the Britain
:46:29. > :46:32.Unzipped USCA! Unfortunately, Holly couldn't be with us tonight and her
:46:32. > :46:35.agent requested that under no circumstances could we go round her
:46:35. > :46:45.house to give her the award in person. But she did send us this
:46:45. > :46:52.message. Hello boys. I just wanted to say, in the same way that I
:46:52. > :46:56.wondered after, I also won this... Which pales into insignificance.
:46:56. > :47:03.The real award is the award for the most strange female, or something
:47:03. > :47:13.like that? I don't quite know what to say other than thank you. I am
:47:13. > :47:18.
:47:18. > :47:23.glad I am weird. Thank you. Thank you very much. You can find out if
:47:23. > :47:28.you are just as weird by going online and checking out the report.
:47:28. > :47:31.Quirky, boring? Check out Britain Unzipped on the BBC Three website.
:47:31. > :47:36.Each week we had questions to find out how your life compares to the
:47:36. > :47:41.rest of Britain. We will provide you with a personalised report. It
:47:41. > :47:51.is up to you whether you share it with friends or keep it to yourself.
:47:51. > :47:53.
:47:53. > :47:57.Just go to the website... Time to link up with the roving Unzipped
:47:57. > :47:59.cameras now at the house of our student friends. Despite studying
:47:59. > :48:02.for impressive-sounding degrees in maths, physics and economics, our
:48:02. > :48:06.students were hiding a darker side to their personalities. A love of
:48:06. > :48:09.song, dance and performing camp cover versions of classic hits.
:48:09. > :48:12.their challenge was to create something very special for our
:48:12. > :48:21.final show and impress our audience and Chelsee. Let's cross live to
:48:21. > :48:31.Joel, Kumar, Lux, Rosh, Welwin and Yad for a very special performance.
:48:31. > :48:31.
:48:31. > :49:55.Apology for the loss of subtitles for 64 seconds
:49:55. > :50:01.APPLAUSE. Yes, I mean... What we are false? I loved it. Absolutely
:50:01. > :50:07.brilliant. Audience? A APPLAUSE. Chelsee and our studio audience,
:50:07. > :50:15.what do you think? Do the boys deserve a prize? Yes! That was
:50:15. > :50:17.amazing. Congratulations, boys. We're going to give you special
:50:17. > :50:27.prize for your efforts tonight. Your very own Unzipped karaoke
:50:27. > :50:34.
:50:34. > :50:44.machine and some champagne. Have a great night! Next it's Celebs
:50:44. > :50:47.
:50:47. > :50:50.Unzipped! Hippie! -- Yippee! Over the course of the series we've
:50:50. > :50:54.learned a lot about the British public, but we've learnt even more
:50:54. > :50:57.about one man. A man whose answers have illuminated the show each week
:50:57. > :51:01.as he's wrestled with philosophical conundrums such as, what animal
:51:01. > :51:05.would you mate with? Do you have a nickname for your willy? And how do
:51:05. > :51:12.you avoid premature ejaculation? His answers were a dolphin, Alfie
:51:12. > :51:15.and think of his Nan or Margaret Thatcher'. So, who better to join
:51:15. > :51:24.Chelsee Healey to play Celebs Unzipped for the final time this
:51:24. > :51:28.series than the legend that is Mr Joe Swash! APPLAUSE. Can you just
:51:28. > :51:36.remind everyone why you wanted to do it with a dolphin? It will feel
:51:36. > :51:44.more like a lady than a camel. would use the blowhole? That is the
:51:44. > :51:54.duty of the dolphin. Endless options. In the gales? The dolphin
:51:54. > :51:55.
:51:55. > :51:59.is a mammal... Anyway... David Attenborough! Chelsee and Joe, it's
:51:59. > :52:06.now time to find out what you know about your fellow celebs. This is
:52:06. > :52:09.our Celebs Unzipped board. All you need to do is pick a square and
:52:09. > :52:11.answer a question about the celeb featured. All the questions, of
:52:11. > :52:14.course, are related to the stats we've uncovered. Get enough
:52:14. > :52:22.questions right and you'll win a drink for everyone in tonight's
:52:22. > :52:28.studio audience. APPLAUSE. And it's the final episode of the series, so
:52:28. > :52:32.we've blown the budget and bought a load of champagne! APPLAUSE. Wait a
:52:32. > :52:39.minute. I've just been told to downgrade that. Can we do Prosecco
:52:40. > :52:46.or Cava? No. It's just some Lidl chardonnay that we've put through a
:52:46. > :52:56.Soda Stream. So if this goes well, it's substitute champagne for
:52:56. > :53:00.
:53:00. > :53:03.everyone! APPLAUSE. Could I please have the sort of music that is
:53:03. > :53:13.meant to make our guests feel important but is likely to backfire
:53:13. > :53:21.because it will just stress Joe out? DRAMATIC MUSIC. Perfect. Are
:53:21. > :53:30.you stressed? Chelsee and Joe, pick your first celebrity! Fearne
:53:30. > :53:36.Cotton... I have a different question that I would just ask.
:53:36. > :53:40.What is this? So... Surprise question. Greg recently invited
:53:40. > :53:50.Fearne Cotton back to his house but did this lead to an embarrassing
:53:50. > :53:54.
:53:54. > :53:59.incident in the bathroom? Or the bedroom? He laughed when you said
:53:59. > :54:04.bathroom so and will go with bathroom... Led us have a look...
:54:04. > :54:08.Or, God! I went to his flat because it forced me to watch the first
:54:08. > :54:14.episode of this show, which I love, but it was not like coming around,
:54:14. > :54:19.he said, we're doing the premier, come and watch it. He paid, which
:54:19. > :54:24.was good for dinner. So I had to stick around. I went to the toilet
:54:24. > :54:34.and there was no loo roll in the bathroom. So... Do the maths? Don't
:54:34. > :54:37.
:54:37. > :54:47.go near the hands tell, is what I am saying. -- hand towel. Next on...
:54:47. > :54:56.I would choose myself. Joe Swash, time for the Joe Swash question of
:54:56. > :55:04.the big... APPLAUSE. -- question of the week. We asked Joe Swash if you
:55:04. > :55:13.have ever been caught masturbating. Did you say yes or no? Chelsee, you
:55:13. > :55:20.have to guess. Straight up, yes... Don't even have to think. Is she
:55:20. > :55:24.right? Yes, a few times. A few times? I have learned my lesson. I
:55:24. > :55:29.now make sure that the door is shut and the windows are not. The let's
:55:29. > :55:34.have a look... Yes, I have been caught masturbating a few times. I
:55:34. > :55:39.was a bit of a Waqar as a kid. I did that a lot. By mother caught me.
:55:39. > :55:45.I had a special T-shirt under my bed. And that was used for special
:55:45. > :55:50.things. My mum once went into my room to tidy up and she put that he
:55:50. > :56:00.should on and said it was very crispy and itchy. That was my
:56:00. > :56:06.
:56:06. > :56:16.special T-shirt! One more for the drink. One more celebrity...
:56:16. > :56:18.
:56:18. > :56:24.will go for Greg... This is for the drink. We asked Gray, how he rates
:56:24. > :56:31.his looks. Did he say, well above average, above average, below
:56:31. > :56:37.average or well below average. Above? Above. He is a handsome
:56:37. > :56:43.fellow. I would say above. Just before we reveal what you said,
:56:43. > :56:53.Greg... Some background research material might help. Look at this...
:56:53. > :57:03.
:57:03. > :57:08.What?! He looked like - it's Terminator. I'll be back... That
:57:08. > :57:14.was at last holiday I went on in my own. We are is that? That is a
:57:14. > :57:19.beautiful dress. He has a man's body but a boy's face. Well, I'm
:57:19. > :57:29.in... I cannot remember but based on that, I will say that is clearly
:57:29. > :57:35.above average. I think you have one. That is right! Yes! Thanks to you,
:57:35. > :57:40.everybody tonight gets a lot of free champagne. That is all we have
:57:40. > :57:46.time for. And for the whole series. A Beike to the students. All the
:57:46. > :57:56.special guests, especially Chelsee Healey and Joe Swash. And thank you
:57:56. > :57:56.
:57:56. > :59:36.Apology for the loss of subtitles for 64 seconds
:59:36. > :59:38.Hi, I'm Claudia-Liza here's our look at the global news channels.
:59:38. > :59:42.Sky and the BBC News Channel took the Queen's Jubilee thank-you
:59:42. > :59:44.message live. It marked the end of the celebrations. CNN showed the
:59:45. > :59:48.Royals on the balcony in front of huge crowds.
:59:48. > :59:50.ABC live in London were sorry for Prince Phillip. His illness meant
:59:50. > :59:54.missing the Queen's big day. Canada's CBC still excited by last