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0:00:03 > 0:00:07- Yes, this is a series - about the menopause.
0:00:07 > 0:00:12- Don't dare switch channels, - because it affects us all.
0:00:13 > 0:00:14- Yes, men too.
0:00:15 > 0:00:16- I'm 53.
0:00:17 > 0:00:21- I should be prepared. - But I have no idea what to expect.
0:00:23 > 0:00:26- I'm determined to find out more.
0:00:26 > 0:00:29- How do women react to it?
0:00:29 > 0:00:31- You get used to your body changing.
0:00:33 > 0:00:36- What are the available treatments?
0:00:36 > 0:00:39- The doctor wasn't much help.
0:00:39 > 0:00:42- I felt worse leaving - than when I went in.
0:00:42 > 0:00:46- How do women all - over the world deal with it?
0:00:46 > 0:00:49- Sometimes, I feel - as if I'm going nuts.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52- This thing, - the change, the menopause.
0:00:52 > 0:00:54- Don't put that in!
0:00:54 > 0:00:55- Don't put that in!- - I can't say.
0:00:58 > 0:01:02- Whatever you call it, - I'm determined to understand it.
0:01:14 > 0:01:17- The menopause is the process...
0:01:17 > 0:01:22- ..when women's periods - and childbearing years end.
0:01:22 > 0:01:26- Women all over the world, - if they live long enough...
0:01:26 > 0:01:29- ..go through the menopause - at some point.
0:01:30 > 0:01:32- It's an experience we all have...
0:01:33 > 0:01:36- ..but is still different - for every individual.
0:01:40 > 0:01:44- Today, I'll try to find out - where I've reached...
0:01:44 > 0:01:47- ..and chat about emotions.
0:01:48 > 0:01:53- But first, we hear about women's - experiences all over the world.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57- We don't have periods now.
0:01:58 > 0:02:00- That's normal!
0:02:01 > 0:02:04- We have had our children, - and they have had theirs.
0:02:04 > 0:02:09- We're happy to live without fatigue. - We can help our family better.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18- It happened last year. - I think I noted the date.
0:02:18 > 0:02:22- But it isn't something - I want to remember.
0:02:22 > 0:02:24- I can't even say the word.
0:02:27 > 0:02:30- I haven't been well - since I've had this illness.
0:02:30 > 0:02:33- I've had terrible hot flushes.
0:02:38 > 0:02:40- So many African women...
0:02:40 > 0:02:44- ..don't have pains or headache - after their elder age.
0:02:47 > 0:02:50- We know that - the best years are past.
0:02:52 > 0:02:54- Our living standards won't change.
0:02:56 > 0:02:58- We're approaching death.
0:02:59 > 0:03:01- There are fewer years ahead.
0:03:01 > 0:03:04- The years to come will be less...
0:03:06 > 0:03:07- ..active.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18- Some women bleed...
0:03:19 > 0:03:21- ..when the moon rises on that side.
0:03:21 > 0:03:24- Others, when the moon - moves to that side.
0:03:25 > 0:03:28- But that isn't a problem for me now.
0:03:30 > 0:03:33- If I had more children, - they would die.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43- I don't bleed any more.
0:03:45 > 0:03:47- I don't need to bleed any more.
0:03:49 > 0:03:53- The moon had the right - to take it from me.
0:04:01 > 0:04:03- What about our women?
0:04:04 > 0:04:07- I wasn't sure if I was - going through the menopause.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10- It went on for a few months.
0:04:10 > 0:04:13- But then, a period returned.
0:04:13 > 0:04:17- I didn't know if I was on heat, - in a heatwave or having a hot flush.
0:04:18 > 0:04:20- I still have tampons - at hand, in case.
0:04:22 > 0:04:23- I was in my forties.
0:04:24 > 0:04:26- It lasted about two years.
0:04:26 > 0:04:31- Then I knew for sure that my body - had changed, I was getting older.
0:04:31 > 0:04:32- That was that.
0:04:34 > 0:04:37- I didn't see it as a sad time.
0:04:37 > 0:04:41- I had two children. - I enjoyed bringing them up.
0:04:41 > 0:04:45- But I felt that time was over. - I was starting a new phase.
0:04:46 > 0:04:47- It's part of life.
0:04:49 > 0:04:54- I only wanted a child for five - minutes, after it was too late.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58- But before and after that, no.
0:04:58 > 0:05:02- All my life, I had terrible pains...
0:05:02 > 0:05:04- ..and heavy periods.
0:05:04 > 0:05:07- The menopause was fantastic for me.
0:05:08 > 0:05:11- It was a relief - not to have any more pain.
0:05:15 > 0:05:20- Although hormonal - change and periods ending...
0:05:20 > 0:05:23- ..is similar for almost everyone...
0:05:23 > 0:05:28- ..the symptoms seem - to vary from country to country.
0:05:28 > 0:05:30- Looking at research...
0:05:30 > 0:05:35- ..it's interesting to see so - much difference between cultures.
0:05:35 > 0:05:37- In the western world...
0:05:37 > 0:05:42- ..women describe the time - just before their periods end...
0:05:42 > 0:05:48- ..as maybe having heavy periods, - feeling tired, low and anxious...
0:05:48 > 0:05:52- ..and feeling extremely hot - for a short time.
0:05:53 > 0:05:58- These are the usual symptoms - mentioned by women in the west.
0:05:59 > 0:06:03- But research in Japan, - or Greece, for example....
0:06:04 > 0:06:09- ..shows that these types - of symptoms aren't mentioned.
0:06:11 > 0:06:16- The feeling of being too hot - isn't all that common.
0:06:17 > 0:06:21- In Japan, there is no term - for hot flushes...
0:06:21 > 0:06:25- ..which shows they aren't - part of women's experiences there.
0:06:26 > 0:06:30- They're more likely - to complain of headaches...
0:06:30 > 0:06:32- ..or having stiff shoulders.
0:06:32 > 0:06:36- It makes you think, OK, - there is a cultural difference.
0:06:36 > 0:06:41- But hormonally, - it's the same condition.
0:06:45 > 0:06:47- Some of the biggest differences...
0:06:47 > 0:06:53- ..are headaches, mentioned - by women in the Philippines.
0:06:53 > 0:06:54- Interesting.
0:06:54 > 0:06:56- Very interesting.
0:06:56 > 0:06:57- Oh!
0:06:58 > 0:07:01- Is it something to do - with what they eat?
0:07:01 > 0:07:07- Maybe that's why they have different - symptoms, compared to this country.
0:07:07 > 0:07:11- In Nigeria, - joint pain is the main complaint.
0:07:12 > 0:07:15- Does it have anything - to do with the weather?
0:07:16 > 0:07:18- That comes with age, anyway.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21- You have aches, - your knee or shoulder goes.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25- That's not the menopause, - it's just ageing.
0:07:26 > 0:07:28- As we heard...
0:07:28 > 0:07:34- ..in Japan they have headaches, - feel stiff, and slightly cold.
0:07:34 > 0:07:36- Oh. Lovely.
0:07:37 > 0:07:40- Women are slightly smaller there.
0:07:40 > 0:07:44- Maybe they're not as heavy - as us in this country.
0:07:45 > 0:07:47- Does that have an influence?
0:07:48 > 0:07:52- It seems that Japanese - women feel the cold.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54- For me, it would be a blessing...
0:07:56 > 0:07:58- ..to feel the cold once more.
0:07:59 > 0:08:03- At least you can wear - more clothes to get warmer.
0:08:04 > 0:08:07- Maybe I'm slightly Japanese.
0:08:07 > 0:08:08- I'm like that.
0:08:08 > 0:08:11- When I don't have a flush...
0:08:12 > 0:08:14- ..I'm freezing.
0:08:15 > 0:08:18- My joints ache a lot.
0:08:19 > 0:08:22- I'd like to find - a happy medium again.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24- Maybe there's a touch of that in me.
0:08:27 > 0:08:31- Women are made the same way.
0:08:31 > 0:08:36- How can menopausal - symptoms differ so much?
0:08:36 > 0:08:40- Maybe that's not - what Japanese women have.
0:08:40 > 0:08:43- No, I don't mean that. - You know what I mean.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45- I can't get my head round that.
0:08:48 > 0:08:49- It is complicated.
0:08:49 > 0:08:54- We know that some things - help women, wherever they live.
0:08:54 > 0:08:58- Being physically healthy can help.
0:08:59 > 0:09:03- It's interesting to look - at women's economic status...
0:09:03 > 0:09:07- ..in different countries - and its effect on symptoms.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10- Women of a higher economic status...
0:09:11 > 0:09:13- ..have worse symptoms.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16- One wouldn't expect that.
0:09:17 > 0:09:21- Poorer women who have had - to work harder physically...
0:09:22 > 0:09:24- ..have fewer problems.
0:09:25 > 0:09:29- The end of periods - is something to be glad about.
0:09:29 > 0:09:31- It's a nicer time of life...
0:09:32 > 0:09:36- ..when women can feel more - comfortable in themselves.
0:09:36 > 0:09:41- Some women also feel - more accepted in a community...
0:09:41 > 0:09:44- ..perhaps particularly - in Muslim countries...
0:09:44 > 0:09:49- ..when the time of the period means - having to withdraw from society.
0:09:50 > 0:09:52- Once this time in life is over...
0:09:53 > 0:09:56- ..women are valued for their wisdom.
0:09:56 > 0:10:01- That certainly influences - their experience of the change.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09- In general, there are great - differences in symptoms.
0:10:10 > 0:10:13- Hot flushes and sweating - are common ones.
0:10:13 > 0:10:19- European and North American women - say this is common and a problem.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22- But they're much less - common in Asia.
0:10:23 > 0:10:27- Some psychologists have suggested - that psychology is a factor.
0:10:27 > 0:10:31- Our expectations - of what is going to happen...
0:10:31 > 0:10:33- ..can affect what happens to us.
0:10:36 > 0:10:38- It's difficult - for women in the west.
0:10:38 > 0:10:42- There is a lot of pressure on us...
0:10:42 > 0:10:47- ..to look physically healthy, - attractive and sexy...
0:10:47 > 0:10:51- ..perhaps until we're - in our 80s or 90s.
0:10:52 > 0:10:54- Our literature and culture...
0:10:55 > 0:11:00- ..often describe older women - as witches, or ugly and wrinkled.
0:11:01 > 0:11:04- We have two different concepts...
0:11:04 > 0:11:07- ..of how women - of a certain age should be.
0:11:07 > 0:11:11- There's also a feeling - that women over 50 disappear.
0:11:11 > 0:11:15- We stop existing - in the way society thinks of us.
0:11:16 > 0:11:17- It's interesting...
0:11:18 > 0:11:22- ..how women incorporate - these expectations...
0:11:25 > 0:11:27- ..with their personal experiences.
0:11:28 > 0:11:33- Older women have to take in - society's expectations of them.
0:11:34 > 0:11:39- Coping with the menopause - can be much harder...
0:11:39 > 0:11:45- ..if society's expectations - are impossibly high.
0:11:47 > 0:11:51- So our perspective - can shape our experience.
0:11:51 > 0:11:55- And our culture - can change our symptoms.
0:11:56 > 0:11:58- Who would have thought?
0:12:02 > 0:12:05- Today, the moon shines - for other women.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08- It's not our problem any more.
0:12:08 > 0:12:08- .
0:12:16 > 0:12:16- Subtitles
0:12:16 > 0:12:18- Subtitles- - Subtitles
0:12:18 > 0:12:23- Subtitles
0:12:23 > 0:12:28- One of the most troublesome - symptom of the menopause...
0:12:28 > 0:12:32- ..is erratic emotions that - are a result of hormonal changes.
0:12:33 > 0:12:38- As a Relate Cymru therapist, Gwen - Ellis deals with emotions every day.
0:12:39 > 0:12:42- We had a chat about the menopause.
0:12:43 > 0:12:49- The menopause can be used - as an excuse to hide other issues.
0:12:49 > 0:12:53- The partner can say, - "She's going through the menopause.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57- "That's why she's bad-tempered."
0:12:57 > 0:13:01- There might be other reasons - why she's feeling that way.
0:13:02 > 0:13:07- In order to help people, - counsellors have to be unbiased.
0:13:07 > 0:13:11- People should be more sensitive...
0:13:12 > 0:13:15- ..towards menopausal women...
0:13:15 > 0:13:20- ..when they have hot flushes - and feel tearful.
0:13:20 > 0:13:24- If a woman has a hot flush, - just open the window!
0:13:25 > 0:13:29- We should say, "I'm having - a hot flush. It's my age. Tough!
0:13:29 > 0:13:31- "I'm opening the window."
0:13:31 > 0:13:35- We shouldn't feel apologetic.
0:13:35 > 0:13:37- Every woman goes through it.
0:13:38 > 0:13:42- It's important - that families and partners...
0:13:43 > 0:13:45- ..discuss what the menopause is.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49- I was supposed to ask the questions.
0:13:50 > 0:13:52- But Gwen is a counsellor.
0:13:57 > 0:14:02- Have you started the menopause?
0:14:03 > 0:14:07- I don't know. - I haven't had any symptoms.
0:14:09 > 0:14:13- My periods stopped a long time.
0:14:13 > 0:14:17- I have a contraceptive implant - that stop periods.
0:14:17 > 0:14:19- I'm none the wiser.
0:14:24 > 0:14:28- Why do a programme - about the menopause?
0:14:28 > 0:14:31- I knew very little - about the menopause.
0:14:32 > 0:14:34- I'd heard about hot flushes.
0:14:34 > 0:14:39- I asked my mother, - "Have you had the menopause?"
0:14:39 > 0:14:40- "Yes," she said.
0:14:41 > 0:14:43- Was your mother open about it?
0:14:43 > 0:14:45- Was your mother open about it?- - I had to ask her.
0:14:45 > 0:14:50- Do you like to think - you're in control?
0:14:50 > 0:14:52- Oh, yes.
0:14:53 > 0:14:57- One of my pet hates would be - a surprise party.
0:14:58 > 0:15:02- I'm not happy - unless I know what's going on.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09- What is the attitude of your family - to growing old?
0:15:10 > 0:15:13- On the whole, my family - live to a ripe old age.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18- Mam is in her seventies. - She sailed through the menopause.
0:15:19 > 0:15:23- The Hafod Oer side - of the family is tough.
0:15:24 > 0:15:28- Explain to me what you mean - about being tough.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32- Blimey!
0:15:32 > 0:15:34- Am I tough?
0:15:34 > 0:15:38- Yes, in some ways, I am.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42- But I also cry at the drop of a hat.
0:15:43 > 0:15:45- Lassie gets me and my sister going.
0:15:46 > 0:15:49- I really enjoy - a tear-jerker film.
0:15:51 > 0:15:55- How do you feel - about the menopause?
0:15:55 > 0:15:59- I'm quite happy about it.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01- I'm 53.
0:16:03 > 0:16:05- I'm getting on.
0:16:05 > 0:16:11- I'd like to think I'll live out - my days like a swan.
0:16:12 > 0:16:14- I don't know if I will.
0:16:14 > 0:16:17- You can have blood tests - to find out.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21- I'm going to have a blood test.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23- Will you still be tough?
0:16:23 > 0:16:25- Will you still be tough?- - Yes.
0:16:30 > 0:16:33- "Self-test for the determination...
0:16:33 > 0:16:38- "..of the follicle-stimulating - hormone FSH in urine."
0:16:38 > 0:16:41- It'll tell me if I'm going - through the menopause.
0:16:48 > 0:16:51- Oh, hello!
0:16:55 > 0:16:58- I'm supposed to pee over that...
0:16:58 > 0:17:01- ..and only over that.
0:17:01 > 0:17:04- I'll take this with me - to the toilet.
0:17:05 > 0:17:07- You can stay there.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12- I hope I can pee now.
0:17:19 > 0:17:21- APPLAUSE
0:17:28 > 0:17:30- Right. I have to wait ten minutes.
0:17:42 > 0:17:44- OK. The ten minutes is up.
0:17:48 > 0:17:52- The left side is redder - than the right.
0:17:52 > 0:17:55- That's a positive result.
0:17:57 > 0:18:01- "You could be undergoing - the menopausal process."
0:18:02 > 0:18:05- Oh! I wasn't expecting that.
0:18:06 > 0:18:11- It says here that it's - 92.8% accurate.
0:18:15 > 0:18:20- I don't know how I feel. - I'm menopausal, according to this.
0:18:22 > 0:18:23- Oh, no!
0:18:24 > 0:18:28- Why have I said, "Oh, no?" - It's a good thing.
0:18:28 > 0:18:30- It is. Isn't it?
0:18:31 > 0:18:33- We'll see.
0:18:36 > 0:18:38- I have mixed emotions.
0:18:38 > 0:18:44- If you're feeling unsure, - get together with some old friends.
0:18:44 > 0:18:47- I hoped I'd get away with it!
0:18:48 > 0:18:51- Why did I think that?! - It's going to happen.
0:18:55 > 0:18:59- Have you discussed - the menopause with friends?
0:18:59 > 0:19:01- Yes, about ten years ago.
0:19:02 > 0:19:04- Are you trying to say something?
0:19:05 > 0:19:10- It's only recently that my friends - and I started talking about it.
0:19:10 > 0:19:13- We discuss it all the time now.
0:19:14 > 0:19:16- Do you discuss it with friends?
0:19:17 > 0:19:18- Yes.
0:19:19 > 0:19:23- Once it's over, - you'll never mention it again.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26- It didn't bother me.
0:19:26 > 0:19:29- It depends - how many problems you get.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31- Did you have any problems?
0:19:31 > 0:19:33- None at all.
0:19:35 > 0:19:39- The menopause isn't giving you - too much grief?
0:19:39 > 0:19:41- I've been lucky.
0:19:42 > 0:19:43- You're looking well.
0:19:43 > 0:19:46- You're looking well.- - Yes, fantastic. You do, too.
0:19:47 > 0:19:50- Thanks. That was an afterthought!
0:19:53 > 0:19:55- When I turned 50...
0:19:56 > 0:19:58- ..it was like a switch went on.
0:19:59 > 0:20:03- I had a hot flush. I thought, - 'What the hell was that?!'
0:20:04 > 0:20:07- Then I thought, - 'That's what it was!'
0:20:07 > 0:20:10- It was just like switching - something on.
0:20:11 > 0:20:16- I was emotional, tearful...
0:20:16 > 0:20:19- ..and all sorts of things.
0:20:20 > 0:20:23- I'm sure I put weight on.
0:20:23 > 0:20:23- Where?
0:20:23 > 0:20:24- Where?- - Everywhere.
0:20:25 > 0:20:28- I was a stone heavier...
0:20:28 > 0:20:31- ..after I went through it.
0:20:31 > 0:20:32- I was eating more.
0:20:32 > 0:20:34- I was eating more.- - That's just it.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38- I try to keep fit.
0:20:39 > 0:20:40- After it began...
0:20:41 > 0:20:43- ..for about two years...
0:20:43 > 0:20:45- ..everything imploded.
0:20:46 > 0:20:51- I couldn't understand what happened - to my legs. They were like jelly.
0:20:52 > 0:20:55- I couldn't believe it. - I was petrified!
0:20:55 > 0:21:00- I was horrified - when I saw my reflection.
0:21:01 > 0:21:03- I cried.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07- I went to Kettlercise - and I do a lot of walking.
0:21:08 > 0:21:10- What's that, a cup of tea?
0:21:10 > 0:21:11- What's that, a cup of tea?- - Like that...
0:21:11 > 0:21:14- ..with two kettles!
0:21:15 > 0:21:19- It's said the menopause - gives us the freedom...
0:21:19 > 0:21:22- ..to do the things - we've always wanted to do.
0:21:24 > 0:21:28- There's no doubt that - I've felt a little crazy.
0:21:29 > 0:21:30- Have you done anything crazy?
0:21:30 > 0:21:32- Have you done anything crazy?- - Good grief, yes.
0:21:32 > 0:21:34- Did it get worse with age?
0:21:35 > 0:21:38- No. Less as I grew older, - thank goodness.
0:21:39 > 0:21:41- I get urges to do bonkers things...
0:21:41 > 0:21:44- ..like throwing myself - out of an aeroplane.
0:21:48 > 0:21:51- With a parachute, obviously.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53- What?!
0:21:53 > 0:21:56- I don't like heights.
0:21:56 > 0:22:01- And I'd have a nice hunk to help me.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09- I'm far more patient.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15- I can laugh with more sincerity.
0:22:17 > 0:22:21- I'm more in control - of my own life.
0:22:25 > 0:22:27- You mentioned having more patience.
0:22:28 > 0:22:31- I went though - a phase of being impatient.
0:22:32 > 0:22:38- I hope I'll come out the other side.
0:22:41 > 0:22:45- I'm looking forward to being nicer.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53- We'll drink to that.
0:22:54 > 0:22:55- With water and tea!
0:22:55 > 0:22:58- With water and tea!- - To Bethan Gwanas being nicer.
0:23:04 > 0:23:08- It's not a time for big knickers, - pills and cream.
0:23:09 > 0:23:13- It's a time to get stronger and - feel comfortable in your own skin.
0:23:15 > 0:23:19- Next time, - we'll discuss men and sex.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42- S4C Subtitles by Gwead
0:23:42 > 0:23:42- .