0:00:02 > 0:00:05Last time, four high-profile pensioners moved in
0:00:05 > 0:00:07with four OAP hosts.
0:00:07 > 0:00:09I'm Lesley.
0:00:09 > 0:00:13And confronted the problems faced by old people living in their own homes.
0:00:13 > 0:00:17I am shocked to think that the fridge is just so empty.
0:00:17 > 0:00:20One thing I'm not going to do is bloody choke up.
0:00:20 > 0:00:24- WHEEZY COUGHING - I've been here a day. I feel exhausted.
0:00:24 > 0:00:26Sorry, I can't say it.
0:00:26 > 0:00:30Tonight, they will experience an old age even more challenging.
0:00:30 > 0:00:33Why do they keep me alive?
0:00:33 > 0:00:37This is the story of four famous pensioners
0:00:37 > 0:00:41who leave behind their wealth, comfort and busy lives
0:00:41 > 0:00:43to move into care homes for the elderly.
0:00:43 > 0:00:46I'm now in respite care from the chaos that is my life.
0:00:46 > 0:00:50- Oh!- I'll be stuck in here for the whole day.
0:00:50 > 0:00:53Many of us dread the prospect of ending up in care.
0:00:53 > 0:00:57All of us would rather be in our own homes. I'm sure that must be true.
0:00:57 > 0:01:03But most of us will be forced to spend our final years relying on others to survive.
0:01:03 > 0:01:05- It's not going to work. - All right, get a breath.
0:01:05 > 0:01:09Like nearly half a million pensioners across the country.
0:01:11 > 0:01:1567-year-old BBC news reporter John Simpson.
0:01:15 > 0:01:19Nobody ever thinks of themselves in a care home or on their death bed.
0:01:19 > 0:01:23Those are the things you can't conceive of.
0:01:23 > 0:01:2771-year-old presenter and journalist Gloria Hunniford.
0:01:27 > 0:01:33My biggest dread in life is not being able to live my life and die in my own home.
0:01:33 > 0:01:39- 65-year-old actor and presenter Tony Robinson.- It might be really boring. I'm most scared of that.
0:01:39 > 0:01:42And 66-year-old actress Lesley Joseph.
0:01:42 > 0:01:48I hope I can bring a little humour to their lives. I'm glass half-full, not glass half-empty.
0:01:48 > 0:01:54How will the four new care home residents cope with living a life they all fear?
0:01:54 > 0:01:57I've done a runner. I couldn't last two whole days.
0:01:57 > 0:02:03Will the experience surprise, even change their attitudes on how many of us will live out our final years?
0:02:03 > 0:02:09Maybe for the first time I realise it must be a relief in some ways to come into a place like this.
0:02:09 > 0:02:12- This is exciting. - Cheers.- Cheers to you.
0:02:12 > 0:02:16I'm 67. I haven't got that many years to go.
0:02:16 > 0:02:20I just want to run back to London and go and scoop my mother up.
0:02:20 > 0:02:23This programme contains some strong language.
0:02:26 > 0:02:31It's day one and the four well-known pensioners are on their way
0:02:31 > 0:02:34to experience an old age a world away from their own.
0:02:34 > 0:02:39It's going to be really good. Well, I don't know what I'll find when I get there.
0:02:39 > 0:02:45For the next three days, they're each moving into one of the UK's 20,000 care homes
0:02:45 > 0:02:50to live alongside British pensioners who can no longer cope living on their own.
0:02:50 > 0:02:53I want to get a better understanding
0:02:53 > 0:02:59of what the less sort of glamorous side of old age is.
0:03:00 > 0:03:05I think I'll want to try the things that people take part in,
0:03:05 > 0:03:11but not because my legs are dodgy or, hopefully, not because I'm incontinent,
0:03:11 > 0:03:14but because I'd like to get a feel of it.
0:03:14 > 0:03:1865-year-old presenter Tony Robinson made up his mind about care homes
0:03:18 > 0:03:22after watching his mum spend the final years of her life in hers.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25There was a sucking of energy out of her.
0:03:25 > 0:03:30There was a sucking of...life
0:03:30 > 0:03:33which meant that not only her,
0:03:33 > 0:03:39but virtually all the elderly people who were there that I spoke to didn't really want to live any more.
0:03:39 > 0:03:46And that's why I feel in a sense terribly angry about the way that we treat the elderly,
0:03:46 > 0:03:49but I also don't know what the alternative is
0:03:49 > 0:03:52and I kind of hope that the journey that we're on now
0:03:52 > 0:03:58might in some way flag up what that alternative or those alternatives might be.
0:03:58 > 0:04:04It's not the kind of day that you would want to be taken into a care home.
0:04:04 > 0:04:08It's freezing cold, it's rainy, it's gloomy.
0:04:10 > 0:04:16Tony's home for the next three days is the Royal Star & Garter in Solihull,
0:04:16 > 0:04:22a charity-run care home for 58 ex-servicemen and women and their partners.
0:04:22 > 0:04:28- Hello, Sue.- You must be Tony.- Yes, I am.- Nice to meet you. Welcome to the Royal Star & Garter.- Thank you.
0:04:28 > 0:04:34Tony wants to find out if the residents here are happy living their final years in care.
0:04:34 > 0:04:38- I love this - "home, sweet home". - And it is our home, sweet home.
0:04:38 > 0:04:40Well, let's hope so.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43- Here we are.- Oh, my room. - This is your room.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45- Lovely to have you.- Thanks, Sue.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49Sue's gone now, yeah?
0:04:49 > 0:04:51It's, it's...
0:04:52 > 0:04:54It's lovely
0:04:54 > 0:05:00and it actually does smell of fresh paint, not the smells that I feared,
0:05:00 > 0:05:02and it's a very big room,
0:05:02 > 0:05:07but what's life going to be like for the people who are here? That's the really important thing.
0:05:09 > 0:05:13If I were going into this home for real,
0:05:13 > 0:05:16it would be the ultimate dread of my life.
0:05:16 > 0:05:22Consumer champion Gloria Hunniford has strong views on care homes.
0:05:22 > 0:05:26I've said to all my family, "I never want to go into a care home."
0:05:26 > 0:05:31There have been some very damning reports of late. I'm not being naive about it.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34I know that there are some very, very good care homes,
0:05:34 > 0:05:39so it might be a lovely home and I might change my mind altogether. Who knows?
0:05:39 > 0:05:42Gloria has been admitted to Hoylake Cottage on the Wirral,
0:05:42 > 0:05:44a nursing home with a difference.
0:05:44 > 0:05:49"Caring for life." That sounds a nice way of putting it. That's good.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51Do a few more side steps for me.
0:05:51 > 0:05:56Hoylake has a rehab unit for pensioners recovering from a serious illness or an accident.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59Take your time. That's it, left leg...
0:05:59 > 0:06:03It's a potentially life-changing crossroads for many old people
0:06:03 > 0:06:09who are assessed on whether they are fit enough to live at home or need to move into a care home for good.
0:06:12 > 0:06:18So I guess I'd better go and get my things in. I brought far too much, not knowing where I was coming to.
0:06:21 > 0:06:23Hi. Good morning.
0:06:23 > 0:06:29- Good morning.- How are you? - I'm Lin Cooke, the chief executive... - Sorry? Lin?- Lin Cooke, yes.
0:06:29 > 0:06:33- Not a man in a grey suit, a nice lady in a pink cardigan. Nice to meet you.- Thank you.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36I'd better make it clear to you right up front,
0:06:36 > 0:06:43- it's my biggest dread in my whole life, having to go into a care home at the end of my days.- Yeah.
0:06:43 > 0:06:47If you gave everybody the choice, they would rather die in their own home.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50We would hope that we could give you the positive side,
0:06:50 > 0:06:54if you ever had to make that choice, you could see the good side of it.
0:06:54 > 0:06:59I'm looking forward to it. I have far too much stuff with me. Can anybody help me with it?
0:06:59 > 0:07:02- Denise will get one of the caretakers to get your belongings.- Thank you.
0:07:02 > 0:07:08- My stuff.- It is.- See what I mean? A lot of stuff!- That's fine.
0:07:08 > 0:07:12- I'll take you through here.- My room. - Your room, yes.
0:07:12 > 0:07:17BBC world affairs editor John Simpson would rather finish his own life
0:07:17 > 0:07:21than move into care or depend on others in old age.
0:07:22 > 0:07:29I've made no secret of the fact that I would rather just sort of take a pill
0:07:29 > 0:07:35and end things, rather than live in misery and be a nuisance to people.
0:07:35 > 0:07:37Life is a wonderful thing,
0:07:37 > 0:07:44but life just in its most technical sense, just with the heart still going,
0:07:44 > 0:07:47is not worth having.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51John is going to a care home for dementia sufferers,
0:07:51 > 0:07:55the kind of condition he fears more than any.
0:07:55 > 0:07:59- We'll go that side of Donald. - Yes, I'd better go that side.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02But staff here hold very different views to his.
0:08:02 > 0:08:06I think it's going to be fantastic having a celebrity stay here,
0:08:06 > 0:08:10so they can understand that life doesn't end coming into a care home,
0:08:10 > 0:08:12especially a dementia care home.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15They don't believe anyone should be written off,
0:08:15 > 0:08:17regardless of illness or age.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19- Shall we put her on the chair?- Yes.
0:08:19 > 0:08:24Dementia covers a range of brain diseases, the most common of which is Alzheimer's.
0:08:24 > 0:08:29Symptoms include loss of memory and problems with communication and understanding.
0:08:29 > 0:08:32No, I really don't know who I am.
0:08:32 > 0:08:36It affects nearly 800,000 pensioners in the UK.
0:08:39 > 0:08:43- Hello, John.- Good morning.- Come on in.- Thank you.- My name's Marsha.
0:08:43 > 0:08:46- Hello, Marsha.- I'm the care manager here.- Excellent.
0:08:46 > 0:08:52- It looks very sort of... It's very bright and nice.- Thank you. That's what we have aimed to do here.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- This is your room.- So it is. - With your name on the door.
0:08:55 > 0:09:01- My God, me all over it! - The residents here, John, do have some form of dementia.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04Have any relatives of yours had dementia, or friends?
0:09:04 > 0:09:06Friends, certainly.
0:09:06 > 0:09:10That's all. Nobody in my own immediate family has had it.
0:09:10 > 0:09:16So, hopefully, over your stay here, you'll see how the carers will actually use the environment
0:09:16 > 0:09:20to help the residents, especially in bouts of bad confusion.
0:09:23 > 0:09:29Three years ago, Lesley Joseph had to find the right home for her 96-year-old mum.
0:09:30 > 0:09:36In the end, she decided on a high quality private care home that she could afford within her means.
0:09:36 > 0:09:39She is now being looked after properly
0:09:39 > 0:09:45where they have activities, where they have exercise classes, where they have physiotherapy,
0:09:45 > 0:09:49all the things she needs to make the quality of her life really good.
0:09:49 > 0:09:54Lesley is going to spend the next three days at Hillview in Middlesbrough
0:09:54 > 0:09:58where nearly all the residents are funded by the local authority.
0:09:58 > 0:10:04The council pays £464 a week for its residents, the minimum amount recommended for their care.
0:10:04 > 0:10:09- Hello. How are you? I'm Lesley Joseph.- Hi, I'm Sheila Smith, the home manager.
0:10:09 > 0:10:11- How are you?- Fine.- Nice to meet you.
0:10:11 > 0:10:17Lesley wants to find out if care at this end of the spectrum is really good enough.
0:10:17 > 0:10:21I'm now in respite care from the chaos that is my life.
0:10:21 > 0:10:27- Good afternoon, everybody. We've got a new resident joining us for a few days.- Hello. Are you all right?
0:10:27 > 0:10:29- I'm Lesley.- Eh?
0:10:29 > 0:10:34- I'm Lesley.- Oh, I'm Mildred. - Hello, Mildred. Nice to meet you.
0:10:34 > 0:10:40It's lunchtime and residents Mildred, a former hairdresser, and Mary-Ann, a former housewife,
0:10:40 > 0:10:43are giving Lesley her first taste of Hillview.
0:10:43 > 0:10:48Would you like a sandwich? We have egg mayonnaise, ham and cheese.
0:10:51 > 0:10:54- Do they have a hot meal in the evening?- Yes.
0:10:54 > 0:10:57How long have you been here?
0:10:57 > 0:10:59- Oh, not very long.- Not very long?
0:10:59 > 0:11:04- And is this now your home? - No, my home's in Lancaster.
0:11:04 > 0:11:05Right.
0:11:05 > 0:11:11- But you can go back and visit?- It's not the same, though.- No, not the same as living there.- No, it isn't.
0:11:11 > 0:11:15- I'm Mary-Ann. - Mary-Ann? That's a lovely name.
0:11:15 > 0:11:18Have you been here long, Mary-Ann?
0:11:18 > 0:11:20- Yes, a few years.- A few years?
0:11:20 > 0:11:23- A good few years.- Yeah?- Yes.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26And you enjoy it here?
0:11:27 > 0:11:29I like it.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35- Do you?- Yes.
0:11:35 > 0:11:39- I'm in for good. - For good?- Yeah, yes.
0:11:40 > 0:11:43'When you sit down, you just have a feeling
0:11:43 > 0:11:48'that they've all left their homes and even now, after a few years,
0:11:48 > 0:11:51'it's difficult to accept that this is now home.'
0:11:51 > 0:11:54And that must be such a hard thing.
0:11:55 > 0:11:58- Welcome to the main lounge. - Thank you.
0:11:58 > 0:12:00- This is Donald.- Very nice to see you.
0:12:00 > 0:12:05Most of the residents in John's new home have mild to moderate dementia.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07- Gaynor.- Hello. I'm John.
0:12:07 > 0:12:12But it's a progressive disease which means the symptoms will get gradually worse.
0:12:12 > 0:12:16- Hello. How do you do? John Simpson. - Oh, dear. I can't get right up.
0:12:17 > 0:12:19So how long have you been here?
0:12:19 > 0:12:23Only minutes. THEY LAUGH
0:12:23 > 0:12:26Oh, I'm so pleased to think that we're working.
0:12:26 > 0:12:28Yes, well...
0:12:37 > 0:12:41- I've seen you before.- The thing is, I'm sometimes on the television.
0:12:41 > 0:12:44- That's what it is.- You know how it is.- Yes, I do indeed.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50- Have you got children?- Yes, I have.
0:12:50 > 0:12:53So what do your children do?
0:12:54 > 0:12:56Um... What do they do?
0:12:56 > 0:12:59- SHE LAUGHS - I know the feeling!
0:12:59 > 0:13:04- How old are they?- I can't even tell you that. Isn't that ridiculous?
0:13:04 > 0:13:06I'm just thinking...
0:13:08 > 0:13:11Your mind, if I had one.
0:13:15 > 0:13:17'I'm learning already'
0:13:17 > 0:13:22not to ask those kind of precise, factual questions
0:13:22 > 0:13:25because many of them don't remember.
0:13:25 > 0:13:28And did you live in Cambridge?
0:13:28 > 0:13:30I lived in, uh...
0:13:32 > 0:13:35- I lived in Cambridge.- Oh, yes.
0:13:35 > 0:13:38'You've got to understand their limitations.'
0:13:38 > 0:13:41It's difficult.
0:13:41 > 0:13:46- I'm just going to go to my room, if you don't mind.- Of course you can. Can you remember the way?- Yes.
0:13:46 > 0:13:50- I'm not one of your patients, you know.- No, no.
0:13:56 > 0:14:00Perhaps I do belong here then because I thought it was here.
0:14:00 > 0:14:02It must be on another floor?
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Oh, it's down here.
0:14:13 > 0:14:15I'm having my senior moment. Here I am.
0:14:15 > 0:14:18KNOCK ON DOOR
0:14:18 > 0:14:20Hi, Donald.
0:14:20 > 0:14:23I've brought Tony to come... just to say hello.
0:14:23 > 0:14:27New boy Tony is being introduced to another recent arrival.
0:14:27 > 0:14:29- Hi, Donald.- Nice to see you, anyway.
0:14:29 > 0:14:3594-year-old former Major Donald Bennett fought in World War Two and won the Military Cross for bravery.
0:14:35 > 0:14:40He moved into the home three weeks ago, but is having difficulty settling in,
0:14:40 > 0:14:42which comes as no surprise to Tony.
0:14:42 > 0:14:46- Where were you before you were here?- I was living at home.
0:14:47 > 0:14:54My wife died over 14 years ago now, so I've been on my own since then, really.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58- So you had to make the decision to come into care?- Yes.- Because...?
0:14:58 > 0:15:01Well, I'd fallen over two or three times at home.
0:15:01 > 0:15:06I felt the time had come. I was getting a bit of a burden rather, to other people, anyway.
0:15:06 > 0:15:09How did you feel when you first got here?
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Well, it was all rather strange.
0:15:12 > 0:15:18You know, you don't have the freedom of a whole house to roam about in and so forth, as I did before.
0:15:18 > 0:15:21- Do you still feel like a new boy? - I do rather, yes.
0:15:21 > 0:15:24I haven't sampled many of the activities
0:15:24 > 0:15:27or any of the activities really, I think,
0:15:27 > 0:15:30which they lay on here for the residents.
0:15:30 > 0:15:33I'd still rather be home, of course. Who wouldn't?
0:15:33 > 0:15:41But it's just the increasing difficulties that one faces at home when you're on your own
0:15:41 > 0:15:46that rather force a decision out of you like that, so...
0:15:46 > 0:15:51Since Donald arrived, he has chosen to spend most of his time in his room.
0:15:51 > 0:15:55- Are you still all right for some physio this afternoon, Donald?- Yes.
0:15:55 > 0:16:00Physio Nicola thinks a motorised wheelchair would really improve his mobility,
0:16:00 > 0:16:04but is struggling to persuade Donald even to use a Zimmer frame.
0:16:04 > 0:16:10- We'll have a little walk with your frame because we're still getting used to that one.- Yes.
0:16:10 > 0:16:16- Why do you need one of these little machines?- I've never used one before until...- Until I suggested it.
0:16:16 > 0:16:22It will help a little bit with your balance because occasionally, you do have a little wobble, don't you?
0:16:22 > 0:16:27- When you're using your sticks. Ever so slightly.- I have been over before now, yes.- Yeah.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29If you just take your time...
0:16:29 > 0:16:32How does it feel, Donald?
0:16:32 > 0:16:35I'm not terribly confident with it, I must say.
0:16:35 > 0:16:41Zimmer frames are a gag, aren't they? You put that in a sentence and you're bound to get a laugh.
0:16:41 > 0:16:47It's the association with the name, really, that people feel you're one of the has-beens, I suppose.
0:16:47 > 0:16:53- It has that stigma.- That you're past it.- Yes. That you're past it, you're over the hill.
0:16:53 > 0:16:58- I suppose it is.- Not necessarily. If we improve your mobility by using the walking frame,
0:16:58 > 0:17:04- we're hoping you can walk that bit longer and you'll be independent for a bit longer.- Yes.
0:17:05 > 0:17:08There is a possibility that he's still clinging on
0:17:08 > 0:17:12to what he had before, but then why wouldn't he?
0:17:12 > 0:17:18I don't know that I want him to accept this place as home.
0:17:18 > 0:17:22Who wants suddenly to adopt an institution after a whole life
0:17:22 > 0:17:26of living in their house with their wife and all those memories?
0:17:29 > 0:17:33- Your name is?- Ann.- Very nice to meet you. And...?- Dennis.- How are you?
0:17:33 > 0:17:38Gloria is meeting patients at Hoylake to see if they share her fear of winding up in care.
0:17:38 > 0:17:41- What happened to you?- I had a fall.
0:17:41 > 0:17:44- I didn't hurt myself. - Didn't break anything?- No.
0:17:44 > 0:17:48- So why did they bring you here? - To learn to walk again.
0:17:48 > 0:17:51- How did you feel before you came in? - A bit apprehensive.
0:17:51 > 0:17:55- But it's fantastic.- Yeah. - Couldn't be better.
0:17:55 > 0:18:01- And how would you feel if you were here permanently?- I wouldn't like that.- Why's that?- I've had enough.
0:18:01 > 0:18:06- You want to go home?- Yes. - Fed up watching the telly and reading the paper?
0:18:06 > 0:18:08And getting fed every four hours.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11- I miss my golf now. - Do you miss it?- I do.
0:18:11 > 0:18:17That's the thing which I suppose, for all of us, that's one of the worst things about getting older.
0:18:17 > 0:18:21You just have to accept that there are things you can't do any more.
0:18:21 > 0:18:27Tomorrow, staff will decide whether 79-year-old Dennis is ready to return home.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29- I'm stiff.- Take your time.
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Dennis had a stroke at the age of 60
0:18:32 > 0:18:37and his wife Ivy has been his carer for the last 19 years.
0:18:37 > 0:18:42When the assessment team goes in tomorrow, what are your hopes, Ivy, as to what happens?
0:18:42 > 0:18:46Well, I'm hoping that Dennis performs how they want him to
0:18:46 > 0:18:51and they can give him the OK to, you know, discharge him for home.
0:18:51 > 0:18:56How would you feel if it turned out that the assessment team said,
0:18:56 > 0:19:00"I don't think he can cope that well at home," and he had to stay here?
0:19:00 > 0:19:05Oh, no, I think I'd want him home. I think I'd want him home.
0:19:05 > 0:19:10So is there anything that you feel you might not be able to do when you go home?
0:19:10 > 0:19:12- Play football. - LAUGHTER
0:19:12 > 0:19:15Play football and golf, eh?
0:19:15 > 0:19:18I only hope he doesn't get too emotional
0:19:18 > 0:19:21- because he can. Can't you?- Do I?
0:19:21 > 0:19:22Yes.
0:19:23 > 0:19:28'I like Dennis very much. He is a man who is charged and ready to go home.
0:19:28 > 0:19:33'They'll have to wait for that assessment to see whether he can manage everything.'
0:19:33 > 0:19:37Or maybe more importantly, can his wife manage everything?
0:19:39 > 0:19:43I think I'd be right if you asked everybody, "How would you like to end your life?"
0:19:43 > 0:19:47They would say, "I want to be in my own home." That's normal.
0:19:47 > 0:19:52But we know that there are many circumstances under which people can't remain like that
0:19:52 > 0:19:55and that is the worry for everybody getting a tad older.
0:19:59 > 0:20:03Many of the residents in the dementia home are already in bed.
0:20:03 > 0:20:06How can you see in the dark like this?
0:20:06 > 0:20:09But still up are John and 88-year-old Hilda.
0:20:09 > 0:20:11He's put on a light now.
0:20:11 > 0:20:15She has recently taken to walking in the garden at night.
0:20:16 > 0:20:19No, we can't get past there, so we'd better go back.
0:20:19 > 0:20:23Hilda has Alzheimer's and her family had to move her into care three months ago
0:20:23 > 0:20:27when it was no longer safe for her to live alone at home.
0:20:27 > 0:20:31- Couldn't we get over that fence? - Wouldn't it be nice?- Yeah.
0:20:31 > 0:20:33- Would you like to get out?- Yes.
0:20:33 > 0:20:37- I know, I think I would too. - I don't want to stay here.
0:20:37 > 0:20:39- Don't you?- No.
0:20:39 > 0:20:41I just want to go away.
0:20:41 > 0:20:43Oh, I'm sorry.
0:20:43 > 0:20:48All I want is just a little bit of happiness, but I'm not getting any.
0:20:48 > 0:20:50Aw!
0:20:53 > 0:20:56Oh, my dear, well...
0:20:56 > 0:20:59What can we do? Can we do anything to make you happy?
0:21:00 > 0:21:02There's nothing.
0:21:02 > 0:21:04Oh, I'm sorry.
0:21:06 > 0:21:08If I could get over that fence,
0:21:08 > 0:21:11I'd be as happy as anything then.
0:21:12 > 0:21:15I know, I know.
0:21:15 > 0:21:18Shall we go in here? Can we get in this way?
0:21:18 > 0:21:20After a day in the dementia home,
0:21:20 > 0:21:26John is still questioning whether people with this condition can have any quality of life.
0:21:26 > 0:21:33I think it's pretty difficult to form any kind of realistic relationship
0:21:33 > 0:21:36with any of the people here, to be honest.
0:21:36 > 0:21:38Will you take your pill for me?
0:21:38 > 0:21:40SHE LAUGHS
0:21:40 > 0:21:45They're in the process of drifting away from relationships
0:21:45 > 0:21:49and personal understandings and all that sort of stuff,
0:21:49 > 0:21:52so I haven't really altered my view
0:21:52 > 0:21:56that if it were me and I saw which way the wind was blowing,
0:21:56 > 0:22:00I would try to find a way of avoiding it.
0:22:00 > 0:22:03You're a funny one, you, aren't you?
0:22:03 > 0:22:07# Show me the way to go home... #
0:22:07 > 0:22:09Shall we go and get hammered?
0:22:10 > 0:22:15At the end of the first day, things aren't much better for Tony.
0:22:15 > 0:22:16- Cheers.- Cheers to you.
0:22:16 > 0:22:23But at least his care home has a free bar where he can drown his sorrows with the ex-servicemen.
0:22:23 > 0:22:27I'm sorry to keep you up late, gentlemen. It's five to seven.
0:22:27 > 0:22:30- I'm leading you into bad habits. - This is exciting.
0:22:30 > 0:22:33'Isn't it extraordinary about that generation?'
0:22:33 > 0:22:38I was surrounded by all these guys who are at least 25 years older than me.
0:22:38 > 0:22:42The experiences that they've had, the heroism that they've undergone,
0:22:42 > 0:22:47and if you passed most of them in the street, you probably wouldn't give them a second look
0:22:47 > 0:22:52and that's what fucks me off about a place like this.
0:22:52 > 0:22:55It really does. That there are all these people
0:22:55 > 0:23:00whose minds are such... of such quality
0:23:00 > 0:23:02and we've put them in an institution.
0:23:02 > 0:23:06I don't like that. I'm sure there ought to be an alternative.
0:23:06 > 0:23:09# Show me the way to go home... #
0:23:09 > 0:23:11That does date us, doesn't it?
0:23:13 > 0:23:18- Night-night. See you tomorrow. - See you tomorrow.- Good night.
0:23:18 > 0:23:22I still can't remember where the bloody place is. Is it down there?
0:23:22 > 0:23:25- No, it's not down there.- Yes, it is. - Is it there?- Yeah.
0:23:25 > 0:23:28Most of the new residents are settling in for the night.
0:23:29 > 0:23:32But in Middlesbrough...
0:23:36 > 0:23:40Going to bed is the furthest thing from Lesley and fellow residents' minds.
0:23:58 > 0:24:01There's a bit of a row going on in there.
0:24:01 > 0:24:06It's actually making me laugh, but I probably shouldn't.
0:24:10 > 0:24:14'I'm not quite sure what started it, if two people don't get on.'
0:24:14 > 0:24:18Or if everybody is just going a bit stir-crazy at the end of a long day.
0:24:18 > 0:24:25I think if you were living here and you didn't get on with somebody, that would make life very difficult.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28I think the sort of adapting you have to do must be huge.
0:24:28 > 0:24:35You lose your independence, you're living with other people you don't know. It'll never be plain sailing.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37- You shut up!- You shut your face!
0:24:41 > 0:24:43KNOCK ON DOOR
0:24:43 > 0:24:49- Good morning.- Good morning. - Hello.- I'm putting make-up on in the bathroom.- Right.
0:24:52 > 0:24:54I could do with a radio here.
0:24:54 > 0:25:00I can't believe John Humphrys is bashing away at some poor politician and I can't listen to it.
0:25:00 > 0:25:03- Good morning.- Hello. Good morning.
0:25:03 > 0:25:05- Hello there.- Good morning.
0:25:05 > 0:25:09In Solihull, Tony has arranged to meet Donald for breakfast.
0:25:09 > 0:25:12- Hi, Don. It's Tony. - Hello, Tony.- Hiya.
0:25:12 > 0:25:16- Sorry.- What's the matter?- I fell over in the bathroom this morning.
0:25:16 > 0:25:20- Oh, no!- At half past eight, I was lying on the floor, I'm afraid.
0:25:20 > 0:25:23- Are you OK?- Yeah, a bit shaken up.
0:25:23 > 0:25:25It's a rather hard floor, you know.
0:25:26 > 0:25:32- How did you attract anyone's attention in order to get you up? - I've got a wristband on.- Yeah.
0:25:32 > 0:25:35So, a good job I had that.
0:25:35 > 0:25:39- Yeah.- Two nurses hauled me up to my feet again.
0:25:39 > 0:25:45As I say, I went down with a bit of a bump. I just lost my balance, you know. It's happened before.
0:25:45 > 0:25:51- Look, I'll come in later on and see how you are.- OK, I'll be around.
0:25:51 > 0:25:56The problem for Don is that he is as bright as a button,
0:25:56 > 0:25:58but his body won't work properly for him.
0:25:58 > 0:26:05It's a bit like if you wanted to do Formula One and you're driving around in a 1960s Triumph Herald.
0:26:05 > 0:26:09And it's not something that's really solvable, I don't think.
0:26:09 > 0:26:15So I feel like I've come down early, waiting for my mate, and my mate's poorly.
0:26:15 > 0:26:18So what do you do for the rest of the day?
0:26:20 > 0:26:25- Good morning.- This morning is Dennis's all-important assessment
0:26:25 > 0:26:30and Gloria has been invited along by the rehab team, but there's a problem.
0:26:30 > 0:26:32Dennis has woken up feeling dizzy.
0:26:32 > 0:26:36I think he has been really working his way towards this
0:26:36 > 0:26:40and it would be an enormous disappointment to him.
0:26:40 > 0:26:43All right, Dennis, how are you feeling?
0:26:43 > 0:26:46- I'm a bit rough today. - A bit rough?- Yeah.
0:26:46 > 0:26:50Will I come back later and we'll see about the home visit?
0:26:50 > 0:26:53- Yeah.- If you have a bit of a sleep now...
0:26:53 > 0:26:55I think the visit will be off.
0:26:55 > 0:26:57- Do you?- I've got a feeling, yeah.
0:26:57 > 0:27:02- Knowing Dennis, he must be feeling pretty rough.- Yeah.
0:27:02 > 0:27:07It's just one of those things. Maybe tomorrow, maybe it'll have to be next week.
0:27:07 > 0:27:09We don't really know, do we?
0:27:11 > 0:27:15Meeting Dennis has made Gloria think about her mum May
0:27:15 > 0:27:21who fought her battle to continue living in her own home after she became ill at the age of 72.
0:27:21 > 0:27:26There was one occasion when she fell between the bed and the wall and she wasn't able to get up
0:27:26 > 0:27:29and she lay there for a very long time, apparently,
0:27:29 > 0:27:32until a neighbour actually came in.
0:27:32 > 0:27:37And I remember her telling me that was just one of the worst moments of her life
0:27:37 > 0:27:39because "A", she felt helpless,
0:27:39 > 0:27:45she wasn't able to physically call anybody, she wasn't near the telephone, couldn't get to the phone
0:27:45 > 0:27:47and she couldn't help herself up.
0:27:47 > 0:27:51And I think, in a weird way, that was the beginning of the end for her
0:27:51 > 0:27:57because she realised for the first time she couldn't live on her own at home and she died in hospital,
0:27:57 > 0:28:03but she was in there a relatively short time, so I think there comes a point in anybody's life
0:28:03 > 0:28:06when you suffer that indignity or you suffer the realisation
0:28:06 > 0:28:12that this could be it and you're going to have to be a bit practical from here on in.
0:28:14 > 0:28:16John, I've got your coffee here.
0:28:16 > 0:28:21After a difficult first day for John, manager Marsha has come up with a plan
0:28:21 > 0:28:25to help him think differently about dementia and his own old age.
0:28:25 > 0:28:29She's sending him out shopping with residents Hilda and Joan.
0:28:29 > 0:28:35So this is a great way of building up relationships with the two ladies going into town
0:28:35 > 0:28:37and they will see you, they will trust you
0:28:37 > 0:28:42and they will know that you're safe, that you're a nice person, and that goes a long way.
0:28:42 > 0:28:47- I'm a bit nervous. Supposing they do a runner or something?- They won't do a runner.
0:28:47 > 0:28:49Joan, where are you going?
0:28:49 > 0:28:5289-year-old Joan has lived in the home for 2½ years
0:28:52 > 0:28:56since her daughter found it impossible to look after her.
0:28:56 > 0:29:02- Do you want to come down and I'll introduce you to Joan properly in her room?- Lovely. Yes, I'd like to.
0:29:02 > 0:29:08Like many of the residents, Joan has difficulty distinguishing between the past and the present.
0:29:08 > 0:29:13That's Dad and Mum at the top. They're all right, they're safe. I got them right, I think.
0:29:13 > 0:29:18And the children come along a bit lower down - Stephen, Peter and Andrew.
0:29:18 > 0:29:22- Yes...- And Anne, isn't there? - Oh, yes.
0:29:22 > 0:29:26Joan remembers them more as children, rather than as adults now.
0:29:26 > 0:29:31And you've got a lot of grandchildren - three, six, nine, ten, eleven grandchildren!
0:29:31 > 0:29:35- I shouldn't think so.- No, I think you have.- Am I that old?- Yeah.
0:29:35 > 0:29:38You've just had your birthday, Joan.
0:29:38 > 0:29:43- I don't count birthdays. - No, quite right.
0:29:43 > 0:29:50Marsha wants to tackle John's assumption that the residents can't enjoy meaningful relationships.
0:29:50 > 0:29:53'There's so much stigma with dementia.'
0:29:53 > 0:29:57Somebody's drooling and the telly's on and what's the point?
0:29:57 > 0:30:00It's nice to be out, isn't it? Seeing the outside world.
0:30:00 > 0:30:03'He came in with that on day one.'
0:30:03 > 0:30:09I want him to be able to go past that to see that there's so much more that he can contribute
0:30:09 > 0:30:15towards that person's wellbeing by just taking the time and seeing them as an individual.
0:30:15 > 0:30:20- What about these sort of things here?- They're soft.
0:30:20 > 0:30:26- They're light. Can you feel them? - Yeah, I think Nicola needs to judge these.
0:30:26 > 0:30:29Not my strong point, really.
0:30:29 > 0:30:33Come and have a look at these things.
0:30:33 > 0:30:35- There's t-shirts.- T-shirts?
0:30:40 > 0:30:43- Do you like that one?- £5.- £5.
0:30:43 > 0:30:47- I like the colour.- They are nice, aren't they?- And these are pretty.
0:30:47 > 0:30:51Yes, I'm not quite so enthusiastic about them.
0:30:51 > 0:30:53- Which of these?- Nightwear.
0:30:53 > 0:30:57Oh, I think I'd like the plain pink, please.
0:30:57 > 0:31:00'Joan is bright and understands a lot of things.'
0:31:00 > 0:31:05She's still got a remarkable amount of marbles left.
0:31:05 > 0:31:10Em, I don't think Hilda has the same awareness and everything,
0:31:10 > 0:31:15but they're perfectly able to look after themselves and potter around.
0:31:15 > 0:31:22I don't think they want to be cosseted and, you know, asked if they're all right all the time.
0:31:22 > 0:31:26- Joan, did you want to do any more shopping?- Not now.- You happy now?
0:31:26 > 0:31:28Yeah, I've finished.
0:31:32 > 0:31:35We had a good time. We had a very good time.
0:31:35 > 0:31:40But just as John thinks he's making some progress with the residents...
0:31:40 > 0:31:45- What are you going to do now, Hilda? Going to have a little rest?- Yes. - Good idea.
0:31:45 > 0:31:47..suddenly it's back to square one.
0:31:47 > 0:31:53- Will you do the same, Joan? - No, I have to go home and see my parents.
0:31:53 > 0:31:55I've been away all day.
0:32:04 > 0:32:07'I felt shocked, actually. Quite shocked.'
0:32:07 > 0:32:13And a bit...a bit depressed. I ought to put the... be the devil's advocate and say
0:32:13 > 0:32:18what the hell's the point of taking two old ladies out
0:32:18 > 0:32:23if within 20 minutes, half an hour of getting back, they don't realise
0:32:23 > 0:32:29- they were out in the first place? - It's about quality of life. It doesn't matter if they forget.
0:32:29 > 0:32:35- If you can just get that short link one day...- It's worth it? - It's worth it.
0:32:35 > 0:32:39It's like somebody suddenly holding up a mirror in front of me
0:32:39 > 0:32:42and saying, "That's what you're going to be like."
0:32:42 > 0:32:47'It is frightening, dementia, for some people, you know.'
0:32:47 > 0:32:52So I want him to be able to go past that. If you spend that time and be with that person,
0:32:52 > 0:32:56you can help their wellbeing immensely.
0:32:56 > 0:33:01According to the proverb, which day never comes?
0:33:01 > 0:33:07When she chose her mum's care home, Lesley looked for a place with plenty of mental stimulation
0:33:07 > 0:33:10and a choice of activities every day.
0:33:10 > 0:33:16Today the only activity Hillview has the resources to lay on is a quiz.
0:33:16 > 0:33:20In medicine, haematology studies the physiology of what?
0:33:20 > 0:33:23Now if you don't get that one...
0:33:23 > 0:33:28'This is quite a small care home, so there's not a lot of activities.
0:33:28 > 0:33:30'There tends to be one a day.'
0:33:30 > 0:33:34No lip reading! Some of the ladies are really good at that.
0:33:34 > 0:33:40As well as working as a carer, Kayleigh doubles up as the activities leader,
0:33:40 > 0:33:45- with the job of keeping 48 residents entertained.- In the animal kingdom,
0:33:45 > 0:33:48is a gnat catcher a bird or a reptile?
0:33:48 > 0:33:51What sort of activities do you set?
0:33:51 > 0:33:57Obviously, I suppose, in the winter months it's really hard to get them outside, isn't it?
0:33:57 > 0:34:00We do a lot of indoor activities. Quizzes, bingo, arts and crafts.
0:34:00 > 0:34:07- I'm trying to get chair aerobics starting again.- I'm surprised you don't do exercise classes.
0:34:07 > 0:34:12That to me is one of the most important things. Do you have a minibus to take residents out in?
0:34:12 > 0:34:16No, we don't have a minibus here. If any resident wants to go out,
0:34:16 > 0:34:22there's always staff to go with them, but the resident has to pay for the transport themselves.
0:34:22 > 0:34:28How does it work, then? Presumably you have quite a restrictive, or maybe a big budget
0:34:28 > 0:34:32- for the activities?- I usually have a budget of around £100 a month.
0:34:32 > 0:34:37They give me extra money for bigger events like the summer fete.
0:34:38 > 0:34:40'The budget for a month
0:34:40 > 0:34:44'is £100. That seemed to be very little to get entertainers in,
0:34:44 > 0:34:48'to get exercise co-ordinators in, to get music people in,'
0:34:48 > 0:34:52to get art materials for an art class.
0:34:52 > 0:34:57£3 a day for 50 people's activities doesn't seem a lot.
0:34:57 > 0:35:01I would have thought double that would be probably more like it.
0:35:01 > 0:35:03Are we ready?
0:35:03 > 0:35:06MUSIC: "Rock Around The Clock"
0:35:06 > 0:35:12Over at Tony's care home, the charity provides ample stimulation for the residents.
0:35:18 > 0:35:24But after spending most of the morning in bed, Donald's decided to stay in his room.
0:35:24 > 0:35:31- Oh, you've got visitors. Sorry. - Hello. My name is Malcolm. - Hello, Malcolm.- And you're Tony.
0:35:31 > 0:35:38- You all right? - I'm fine, yeah. How are you now? - I'm just sort of trying to relax.
0:35:38 > 0:35:42Having had that fall, I'd rather not be too active this morning.
0:35:42 > 0:35:48- Well, I'll leave you on your own this afternoon, with your mates.- My mates, yes.- Have a good afternoon.
0:35:48 > 0:35:51- See you, guys.- See you. Bye.
0:35:58 > 0:36:00It's a really lousy old day,
0:36:00 > 0:36:03Don's fallen over.
0:36:03 > 0:36:09I felt really positive when I went to bed last night. I don't really feel like that now.
0:36:10 > 0:36:14I'll be stuck in here for the whole day!
0:36:17 > 0:36:22The rehab team at Hoylake have been back to check on Dennis.
0:36:22 > 0:36:24Dennis is feeling a lot better.
0:36:24 > 0:36:28- He's had a good rest in bed. - Yes, he's bounced back.
0:36:28 > 0:36:31We'll be having a home visit this afternoon.
0:36:31 > 0:36:38- OK, off we go.- After six weeks in the care home, Dennis is about to have his assessment.
0:36:38 > 0:36:44- Today he'll find out if he's fit enough to move back into his own home yet.- Are you a bit nervous?
0:36:44 > 0:36:48- A bit apprehensive, yes.- Are you? - But lots of people feel like that.
0:36:48 > 0:36:52- I'll be all right.- You'll do fine.
0:36:54 > 0:36:56'His spirits were rock bottom.'
0:36:56 > 0:37:02I don't know whether he thought, "This is it. I'm in here now and that's my lot."
0:37:02 > 0:37:08But I said, "No. Between us, we'll get you back on your feet and you'll come back home to us."
0:37:10 > 0:37:16If Dennis is still struggling to cope at home, he'll need to return for a longer stay in rehab.
0:37:16 > 0:37:22'It's very emotional for me, but...I am trying to hold it together.'
0:37:22 > 0:37:28But he'll be all right. I'm sure he'll be all right once he gets home.
0:37:29 > 0:37:32I'll just be glad to see him, that's all.
0:37:34 > 0:37:39- The next hour is crucial.- You all right, Dennis?- OK.- All right.
0:37:39 > 0:37:46The rehab team will be assessing Dennis on his ability to move safely around his house.
0:37:46 > 0:37:47Good man.
0:37:51 > 0:37:56- Hello! - Ivy has no idea about Dennis's dizzy spell this morning.
0:37:58 > 0:38:00- Wrong leg that was.- Oh, Dennis.
0:38:00 > 0:38:04- Wrong leg.- That's quite a high step, isn't it?- It is.
0:38:04 > 0:38:09- Well played. - I wasn't too good this morning.
0:38:09 > 0:38:12- Why? - I got out of bed all wobbly.
0:38:12 > 0:38:15- Oh, dear. - A bit dizzy.
0:38:15 > 0:38:19- Shall we go to the bedroom?- OK. - Try you on and off your bed.
0:38:21 > 0:38:26Getting in and out of bed is the main thing because I can only help him so much.
0:38:26 > 0:38:28I can't do that for him.
0:38:28 > 0:38:33- Will I lie down?- Yeah, let's see you getting on your bed. Wow. Excellent.
0:38:33 > 0:38:40- Have you ever tried a bed lever? - No.- OK. Maybe we can try it. - What is a bed lever?
0:38:40 > 0:38:47It's for somebody who is struggling to get from lying to sitting. It can help in that respect.
0:38:47 > 0:38:51- Can you hold that? This is what I do.- This is what you do.
0:38:56 > 0:38:58Oops.
0:38:58 > 0:39:03- I don't do that. - Where did you go there?
0:39:03 > 0:39:07- It was lower than I thought it was. - OK, OK. All right. Get a breath.
0:39:07 > 0:39:09OK.
0:39:16 > 0:39:20- No, it's not going to work. - Dennis, what about this rail?
0:39:20 > 0:39:21No.
0:39:23 > 0:39:28After 20 minutes, it's clear that Dennis is not fit enough to go home quite yet.
0:39:28 > 0:39:32'There are a few further tasks that we need to...'
0:39:32 > 0:39:36- Yeah.- ..work on. Just to make him as safe as possible.
0:39:36 > 0:39:40'He's been building up to this for quite a while, really.'
0:39:40 > 0:39:42Now it's sort of, "Ooh!"
0:39:43 > 0:39:46This is the reality of what's happened.
0:39:46 > 0:39:53- What adjustment would you make in the bathroom?- So far I'd possibly fit a toilet frame around the toilet
0:39:53 > 0:39:55and possibly get it floor-fixed.
0:39:58 > 0:40:01'I am hoping it's going to work. We'll just see.'
0:40:01 > 0:40:07We could laugh about this in a few weeks' time, couldn't we? And say, "Remember that...?"
0:40:07 > 0:40:09Hopefully, we will.
0:40:11 > 0:40:19'It was a bit of a shock, I must say, when he didn't quite make it over that step with his leg
0:40:19 > 0:40:25'and he did buckle a little bit. That must be very disappointing for him.'
0:40:26 > 0:40:32You were good today the way you just said, "I know I've got to do a bit more work on this leg."
0:40:32 > 0:40:38- You're being very realistic and honest, aren't you? - I'll be there in the summer.
0:40:50 > 0:40:56John's meeting Joan's daughter, Ann, who often comes to visit her mum at the care home
0:40:56 > 0:41:01and looked after her mum at home until she was no longer able to cope.
0:41:01 > 0:41:07I got really tired and stressed and it was so difficult. She got cross with me and aggressive.
0:41:07 > 0:41:13It's a horrible illness and you don't wish it on anybody, but if people are going to live to this age
0:41:13 > 0:41:19we owe it to them, really, to make their life fulfilled. We've got to, if possible,
0:41:19 > 0:41:25- provide this sort of quality... - It's got to be decent.- I couldn't bear for Mum to be sitting all day
0:41:25 > 0:41:30just doing nothing. I think that's an awful way to treat people.
0:41:30 > 0:41:34She could go on for a long time. She'll be 90 next year.
0:41:34 > 0:41:41The difficult bit might be if she gets worse. That's partly why I do loads of photographs with her.
0:41:41 > 0:41:47All the time we do, because we go back right to her childhood and she knows who everybody is
0:41:47 > 0:41:54and where they are, what they're doing, which I think keeps a little bit of the memory alive.
0:41:54 > 0:41:57A quarter of an hour is useless.
0:41:57 > 0:42:02For the first time, John's feelings about living with dementia are changing.
0:42:02 > 0:42:09It's lovely to see that coming to a place like this doesn't have to be the end of the family relationship.
0:42:09 > 0:42:14It can still continue, under different circumstances.
0:42:14 > 0:42:18So that's a big, big thing for me to have seen that.
0:42:20 > 0:42:26- Now where are we? - I don't know where this is. Must be one of the big rooms upstairs.
0:42:26 > 0:42:29I can't see these without my glasses.
0:42:29 > 0:42:34'I think what I've learnt probably most of all today is'
0:42:34 > 0:42:38how valuable, how worthwhile it is
0:42:38 > 0:42:41'to work with people with dementia.'
0:42:41 > 0:42:43Do you...? How about my glasses?
0:42:43 > 0:42:49- Then I shall have to peer. - Oh, they're quite good.- Are they? Well, you can't have them!
0:42:49 > 0:42:52'I suppose before I thought'
0:42:52 > 0:42:56they're finished, really, as human beings. They're sucked oranges
0:42:56 > 0:43:00'and there's just the outer signs of what they once were.'
0:43:00 > 0:43:05And so actually, frankly, not much point in doing anything with them.
0:43:05 > 0:43:11I've now come to realise how wrong that is. That person is still there, somewhere.
0:43:11 > 0:43:16If only you can just find the way of reaching, reaching through.
0:43:16 > 0:43:20- I can't see them. They're too small and I've got no glasses.- Oh, I see.
0:43:20 > 0:43:25- Cos a certain person has my glasses. - It's one of them.- No, you!
0:43:25 > 0:43:28- Me? I haven't got your glasses. - You have!
0:43:30 > 0:43:34- Would you like a cup of tea before bed?- That would be great.
0:43:34 > 0:43:38It's nearing the end of their second day in care homes.
0:43:38 > 0:43:43- We'll speak tomorrow. OK. - Thank you.- OK. Good night.
0:43:43 > 0:43:46He's nice, isn't he? Very kind.
0:43:46 > 0:43:49And I appreciate that.
0:43:50 > 0:43:53But Tony's decided he's had enough of his.
0:43:55 > 0:43:58I've done a runner!
0:43:58 > 0:44:02I've broken free. I couldn't last two whole days.
0:44:02 > 0:44:05It just drove me bonkers.
0:44:06 > 0:44:10It's terrible, isn't it? That is a very, very good care home.
0:44:10 > 0:44:17I'm casting no aspersions on it at all, but just to be cooped up for so long in the same place
0:44:17 > 0:44:24with no expectation of any surprises during the course of the day.
0:44:24 > 0:44:27I just... I just found that so difficult.
0:44:27 > 0:44:30It's just the whole notion
0:44:30 > 0:44:33of being...stuck in there
0:44:35 > 0:44:39from now until the end of my life is horrendous.
0:44:39 > 0:44:43And I couldn't last one and a half days!
0:44:43 > 0:44:46Pathetic!
0:44:48 > 0:44:54Up in Middlesbrough, it's now two nights on the trot in front of the telly for Lesley.
0:45:03 > 0:45:09- Does anybody know what we're watching?- Nobody cares what we're watching.- You might not.
0:45:09 > 0:45:11- You shut up.- I won't shut up.
0:45:11 > 0:45:15'It's actually made me feel quite uncomfortable being here.
0:45:15 > 0:45:20'Some homes will not have the level of care that you get here'
0:45:20 > 0:45:26because that is very, very high. But nobody goes on little adventures any more
0:45:26 > 0:45:32maybe because they don't have a minibus, or because they have to rely on a family member.
0:45:32 > 0:45:37Maybe it's a financial thing that they have to get a taxi. I feel claustrophobic.
0:45:37 > 0:45:43I want to open the front door and breathe and that's why I...
0:45:44 > 0:45:50if I'm absolutely honest I just want to run back to London and scoop my mother up.
0:45:56 > 0:45:59What's this?
0:45:59 > 0:46:01Oh, cranberry juice.
0:46:01 > 0:46:05I'll have a quick cup of tea and I shall get up.
0:46:09 > 0:46:13I've really found this very difficult. I didn't expect to at all.
0:46:13 > 0:46:18I'm not sure whether it's to do with the fact that, em...
0:46:18 > 0:46:26my mum died in a space so similar. I can't tell you how similar this room is to the one
0:46:26 > 0:46:29where she spent her last... eight years.
0:46:29 > 0:46:35After making a run for it the night before, there's only one thing on Tony's mind -
0:46:35 > 0:46:39he wants to do it again, but this time with his mate.
0:46:39 > 0:46:44'I have this vague idea it might be possible to take a few people to lunch, particularly Don,
0:46:44 > 0:46:47'who hasn't gone on a trip at all.'
0:46:47 > 0:46:52But yesterday was not a great day. He fell over and lost an enormous amount of confidence
0:46:52 > 0:46:57and really buried into himself. I don't want to push him.
0:46:59 > 0:47:06Tony's found a new way to get around his home and he's keen to show off his new toy to Donald.
0:47:06 > 0:47:09I've lost where I'm going to!
0:47:14 > 0:47:16Hi, Donald!
0:47:16 > 0:47:20I'm going through the experience. Do you fancy the pub for lunch?
0:47:20 > 0:47:24It's very nice of you. I wouldn't mind that at all, but...
0:47:24 > 0:47:30- And we could have a good bottle of wine.- Yes, that would be a very nice change, Tony.
0:47:30 > 0:47:35- That's very kind of you.- Excellent. Right, I'll leave you to get ready.
0:47:35 > 0:47:42- It's all done with that one control? - It is, yeah. I can't recommend this too highly.- Well done. Bye for now.
0:47:47 > 0:47:53At short notice, the care home has laid on a minibus to take the gang to the pub.
0:47:53 > 0:47:57Donald? Is this the first time you've been in this bus?
0:47:57 > 0:48:03- Yes, indeed.- So you haven't actually been out anywhere up 'til now? - No. I haven't been here very long.
0:48:03 > 0:48:06Three weeks!
0:48:06 > 0:48:10- I'd have climbed out the window by now.- Oh, it is three weeks, yes.
0:48:10 > 0:48:12- How time flashes by!- Ha!
0:48:12 > 0:48:16That's it. The White Lion on the right.
0:48:19 > 0:48:25'I don't think being here I'm going to be able to help Donald very much.
0:48:25 > 0:48:30'I'm not going to speed in here and ease his transformation
0:48:30 > 0:48:34'from his independence to being in a care home.
0:48:34 > 0:48:38'There's only one person who can do that and that's himself.'
0:48:39 > 0:48:45- Would a bottle of Chateauneuf du Pape go down all right?- Yes. - It would go down extremely well.
0:48:47 > 0:48:50- Cheers, gentlemen.- Oh, cheers, yes.
0:48:50 > 0:48:53To many happy years.
0:48:53 > 0:48:54Don,
0:48:54 > 0:48:58how do you feel as a man
0:48:58 > 0:49:03who has been pretty independent for most of his life
0:49:03 > 0:49:09to be in a situation where actually you have to hand over that independence to other people
0:49:09 > 0:49:15who are going to tell you what to do and not to walk with the sticks and all those things?
0:49:15 > 0:49:21Well, obviously I feel sorry about it and I'm reluctant to let it go,
0:49:21 > 0:49:26but I think you've just got to accept the situation as it presents itself to you.
0:49:26 > 0:49:33How does it feel, knowing that you'll probably spend the rest of your days
0:49:33 > 0:49:38- in an environment which isn't your own? - Resignation rather is the word!
0:49:38 > 0:49:42- Yes.- Resigned to it.- Yes, yes.
0:49:42 > 0:49:48To try and make life as fulfilling as possible and keep your independence for as long as possible
0:49:48 > 0:49:50and go out places.
0:49:50 > 0:49:54Do as much as you can and keep as active you can as long as you can.
0:49:54 > 0:49:57- Yeah, that's my view, too.- Yeah.
0:49:57 > 0:49:59Once we get back,
0:49:59 > 0:50:05do you think I might be able to persuade you to try my motorised car?
0:50:05 > 0:50:09- Well, I wouldn't mind trying it, I must admit.- Good.
0:50:09 > 0:50:16- Well...- You get on all right with yours.- You like yours. - I do. I wouldn't be without it.
0:50:16 > 0:50:20- Half past four for a little burn-up on the corridor?- Right-o.
0:50:20 > 0:50:25- Surely.- Probably illegal, but we'll do that.- Yeah.
0:50:25 > 0:50:31'The question that I've kept asking myself since I first came in here has been how would I be
0:50:31 > 0:50:34'when I come here.
0:50:34 > 0:50:40'And what I've got from Vic and Don, and they've been absolutely open, is the same word - resignation.
0:50:40 > 0:50:46'I would just like to hope that there is more to the end of our days than simply resignation.'
0:50:49 > 0:50:53Anybody else know My Old Man?
0:50:54 > 0:50:56Shall I pass down the words?
0:50:56 > 0:51:01With no minibus to call on, actor and panto performer Lesley
0:51:01 > 0:51:07- has tried to come up with her own affordable way of stimulating the residents.- Do you know My Old Man?
0:51:07 > 0:51:10- A singsong. - One, two, three.
0:51:10 > 0:51:15# My old man said follow the van
0:51:15 > 0:51:20# And don't dilly dally on the way... #
0:51:20 > 0:51:25For Lesley, low budget may not directly affect the quality of care at Hillview,
0:51:25 > 0:51:29but she can't help feeling that something is missing.
0:51:29 > 0:51:36'In my view, the role of a care home is to give care to somebody who can no longer care for themselves,
0:51:36 > 0:51:40'but also a place where the mind is stimulated.'
0:51:40 > 0:51:45It's not a place where people will just sit and wait for death.
0:51:45 > 0:51:50And I suppose in a way one would like to think that every care home could do everything it needed,
0:51:50 > 0:51:57but it's making sure that they are still excited to wake up in the morning and see what's ahead.
0:51:57 > 0:52:02# ..when you can't find your way home! #
0:52:07 > 0:52:12Is it possible for me to in and out this door for a walk?
0:52:12 > 0:52:16I want to be up and out. I can't get out anywhere.
0:52:16 > 0:52:19If I get out, I can't get in.
0:52:19 > 0:52:22I can't even get up to my husband!
0:52:22 > 0:52:25Or my...my stepmother. My mother.
0:52:25 > 0:52:28- Come on.- They're only...
0:52:28 > 0:52:30They're in the...in the...
0:52:30 > 0:52:34ground. I can't get in and out.
0:52:34 > 0:52:39- I'm sorry...- I don't want to take anything out. Or pinch anything.
0:52:39 > 0:52:43- Do you want some company? Can I come with you?- By all means.
0:52:43 > 0:52:47- Then I can take you and show you what I'm doing.- OK. Show me.
0:52:47 > 0:52:51- I didn't ask my parents to go and die.- No, I know.
0:52:51 > 0:52:53She's a bit upset.
0:52:55 > 0:53:02- Hello!- I can't get at it. I can't pinch things. I don't want things. I can't drive a car.
0:53:06 > 0:53:13- I'll tell you where I want to go first today.- Yes, where? - It's to see my brother's grave.
0:53:13 > 0:53:16- He's dead.- Yes, my darling.
0:53:16 > 0:53:18Why do they keep me alive?
0:53:21 > 0:53:23Come inside, eh?
0:53:25 > 0:53:31'Yeah, it was a bit upsetting. It was hard to listen to, hard to take,
0:53:31 > 0:53:34'but it's part of the disease, I suppose.'
0:53:34 > 0:53:37It just cuts right to the heart, doesn't it?
0:53:37 > 0:53:41And to think of somebody being that old and that alone.
0:53:41 > 0:53:46It happens that the place where she's living out her life is a very nice one,
0:53:46 > 0:53:50but it doesn't take away the pain. Poor old thing.
0:53:52 > 0:53:58I lead this weird life where I go chasing round the globe all the time and, of course,
0:53:58 > 0:54:02you miss out on family and when I come here
0:54:02 > 0:54:06and I see these things and I see people fading away,
0:54:06 > 0:54:08I think, you know,
0:54:10 > 0:54:14got to get in there and be with them
0:54:14 > 0:54:20and not just let...not just think, "Oh, well, I can't do anything this month, but maybe next month.
0:54:20 > 0:54:22"Not this year, maybe next year."
0:54:22 > 0:54:28Well, there aren't... I'm 67 and I haven't got that many years to go
0:54:28 > 0:54:34and, you know, I want to see these people that are important to me.
0:54:36 > 0:54:41Are you ready? Yeah, come on, Peter Fonda.
0:54:46 > 0:54:47Okey-doke?
0:54:48 > 0:54:54- I don't know how I sit on it. Can that go up for a moment?- It can.
0:54:54 > 0:54:56- Oh, it's going...- Hey!
0:54:56 > 0:55:00- You're in. Are you all right? - I'm all in one piece.
0:55:00 > 0:55:02He needs to have his feet up.
0:55:06 > 0:55:08That's it. Excellent.
0:55:10 > 0:55:12This is quite interesting.
0:55:13 > 0:55:14Steve?
0:55:14 > 0:55:22- You're doing really well, Don. Fantastic.- I could run you down at any moment.- I'll leap out the way!
0:55:23 > 0:55:25- Yeah.- Very good.
0:55:25 > 0:55:29'If he decides to continue using that little car,
0:55:29 > 0:55:34'I think it's going to help him enormously here.
0:55:34 > 0:55:39'He'll come out of his room more and maybe engage a bit more in the activities.'
0:55:39 > 0:55:44- He's doing very well. - Does it surprise you?- Yes.
0:55:44 > 0:55:49I've seen people do this before for the first time and be completely hopeless.
0:55:54 > 0:56:00- Today's been... a day of novel experiences, as far as I'm concerned.- In what way?
0:56:00 > 0:56:06Well, I'd never been on the bus before, I haven't been to one of the pub lunches before.
0:56:06 > 0:56:12And I haven't been in an electric wheelchair before, so they're all new to me.
0:56:12 > 0:56:14Quite interesting, though, and...
0:56:14 > 0:56:17a damn good lunch, I must admit.
0:56:18 > 0:56:22Yeah, I'm really pleased that he took the plunge
0:56:22 > 0:56:27and came away saying, "That was really rather good fun."
0:56:27 > 0:56:33And he's actually prepared to get on board and drive back. He seems to be looking rather forward to it.
0:56:33 > 0:56:36So...yeah, I felt good about that.
0:56:36 > 0:56:39It's quite an enjoyable experience.
0:56:39 > 0:56:41It beats walking! Yeah, yeah.
0:56:44 > 0:56:47I'm just going to go now, everybody, so bye!
0:56:47 > 0:56:49Goodbye!
0:56:49 > 0:56:55After their short stay in care homes, it's time for the four visiting pensioners to go home.
0:56:55 > 0:56:59- You feeling a bit better today? - A headache today.- Bit of a headache?
0:56:59 > 0:57:01Oh, dear.
0:57:01 > 0:57:07- I hope you make it home soon. - Thank you.- Did you waken up with the headache?- I did, yes.
0:57:07 > 0:57:09I think I've a cold in the head.
0:57:09 > 0:57:12'Maybe for the first time I realised that if somebody'
0:57:12 > 0:57:16is on his or her own and they don't have any family
0:57:16 > 0:57:20and you do become weak, I can see
0:57:20 > 0:57:23that it must be a relief in some ways to come to a place like this.
0:57:23 > 0:57:29But on the other hand I'm just going to pray that I can keep as fit and well as I can
0:57:29 > 0:57:33and somebody else might fulfil my wish of keeping me at home.
0:57:33 > 0:57:36It's a real pleasure to see you.
0:57:36 > 0:57:41'It's changed my views to the extent that I can see how it could be really quite pleasant
0:57:41 > 0:57:44'to be in a care home like this.'
0:57:44 > 0:57:47- Thank you. Look after yourself. - Thank you.
0:57:47 > 0:57:52'And just gradually sort of drift out of...out of life.'
0:57:52 > 0:57:56Thank you, Joan, for being lovely company. 'What it boils down to'
0:57:56 > 0:58:01is if this happens to me, this is my pathway in the future,
0:58:01 > 0:58:04'it isn't something to be terrified of.'
0:58:04 > 0:58:06Bye, Arthur. Bye-bye.
0:58:06 > 0:58:11Despite realising the value of care for someone like Donald,
0:58:11 > 0:58:14Tony's core conviction remains.
0:58:14 > 0:58:21'I would argue vociferously that care homes ought to be as good as possible,
0:58:21 > 0:58:27'that they ought to be funded both by government, by local authorities and by charities
0:58:27 > 0:58:33'well enough so that every old person in the country who requires a place in a care home
0:58:33 > 0:58:37'should get one of the highest level possible,
0:58:37 > 0:58:43'and yet and yet and yet...I'd also argue can we find strategies to keep people in the home
0:58:43 > 0:58:51'rather than getting them into care homes? I don't feel we're trying to find a solution hard enough.'
0:59:05 > 0:59:07Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd