0:02:22 > 0:02:26MEN SPEAK GERMAN
0:02:28 > 0:02:31CLOCK CHIMES
0:02:33 > 0:02:35Allo!
0:02:40 > 0:02:48MAN SPEAKS ITALIAN
0:02:55 > 0:02:57- What's all this fuss about, Charters?- I'm hanged if I know.
0:02:57 > 0:03:00MAN SPEAKS GERMAN
0:03:04 > 0:03:06Ladies and gentlemen, I'm very sorry,
0:03:06 > 0:03:08the train is little bit up-hold.
0:03:08 > 0:03:12And if you wish to stay in my hotel, you have to register immediately.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15Why the deuce didn't he say so in the first place?
0:03:15 > 0:03:17Ah!
0:03:21 > 0:03:24Oh! How do you do, Miss Henderson? How do you do, ladies?
0:03:24 > 0:03:26It's a great honour to have you with us again.
0:03:26 > 0:03:29Nice to see you too, Boris. You haven't changed a bit since Friday.
0:03:29 > 0:03:31- I see you haven't shaved either. - Is everything ready?
0:03:31 > 0:03:34Everything is ready. I didn't change anything.
0:03:34 > 0:03:35Not even the sheets, we know.
0:03:35 > 0:03:38- Lead on, Boris.- You see, I didn't expect you to come so quickly.
0:03:38 > 0:03:41Well, our legs gave out on us.
0:03:41 > 0:03:43- We had to do the last lap in a farm car.- Oh!
0:03:43 > 0:03:44I see we've got company.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Don't tell me Cook's are running cheap tours here?
0:03:46 > 0:03:49- What is it, Boris? - It's the avalanche.
0:03:49 > 0:03:52- Avalunch? - Avalanche, Boris. Avalanche.
0:03:52 > 0:03:54In the spring, we've got many avalanches.
0:03:54 > 0:03:56You know, the snow goes bloop, and everything disappear.
0:03:56 > 0:03:58Even train disappear under the avalanche.
0:03:58 > 0:04:01But I'm going home tomorrow. How long before they dig it up?
0:04:01 > 0:04:03By morning, it's lucky for you.
0:04:03 > 0:04:05You can leave by this train instead of your own.
0:04:05 > 0:04:09How you say it? It's a bad wind that blow nowhere no good.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11Talking of wind, we've not eaten since dawn.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14- Serve us supper in our room, Boris, in our room.- I could eat a horse.
0:04:14 > 0:04:16Don't put ideas into his head.
0:04:16 > 0:04:20- Some chicken, Boris, and a magnum of champagne, and make it snappy.- Yes.
0:04:20 > 0:04:24Bandrika may have a dictator, but tonight we're painting it red.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Meanwhile, we have to stand here cooling our heels, I suppose.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30- Confounded impudence!- Third-rate country. What do you expect?
0:04:30 > 0:04:34- I wonder who those women were. - Possibly Americans, I should think.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36You know, almighty dollar, old man.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38I suppose we'll have to wait here.
0:04:38 > 0:04:40If only we hadn't missed the train at Budapest.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43I don't want to rub it in, but if you hadn't insisted standing
0:04:43 > 0:04:45while they sang their national anthem...
0:04:45 > 0:04:47Yes, but you must show respect, Caldicott.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49Of course, if I'd known it would last 20 minutes...
0:04:49 > 0:04:51It's my contention that the Hungarian Rhapsody
0:04:51 > 0:04:52is not their national anthem.
0:04:52 > 0:04:56- Any case, we were the only two standing.- That's true.
0:04:56 > 0:04:58Well, I suppose we should be in time after all.
0:04:58 > 0:05:00I doubt it. That last report was pretty ghastly, do you remember?
0:05:00 > 0:05:04- "England on the Brink".- Yes, but that's newspaper sensationalism.
0:05:04 > 0:05:07- The old country's been in tight corners before.- Looks pretty black.
0:05:07 > 0:05:10Even if we get away first thing, there's the connection at Basle.
0:05:10 > 0:05:11We'll probably be hours.
0:05:11 > 0:05:13- That's true. - Well, somebody surely can help us.
0:05:13 > 0:05:17Sir, do you happen to know what time the train leaves Basle for England?
0:05:17 > 0:05:19HE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:05:19 > 0:05:21Oh, really? Fellow doesn't speak English.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29ALL SHOUT
0:05:34 > 0:05:36Allo, Alex?
0:05:36 > 0:05:41HE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:05:41 > 0:05:42..champagne, Miss Anderson.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49BOTH SPEAK FRENCH
0:05:51 > 0:05:55Here's one leaves Basle, 21.20.
0:05:55 > 0:06:00- 21.20?- Yes.- 20, 20, 12 from 21 is... - Yes. 21 from 20...
0:06:00 > 0:06:01One, two, three, four, five...
0:06:01 > 0:06:04I regret, sir, there is only left two single room in front,
0:06:04 > 0:06:06or a little double room at the back.
0:06:06 > 0:06:09- We'll take the two singles. - Very well, sir. Here is it.
0:06:09 > 0:06:11- Thank you.- Thank you.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15At least you might have asked me which I preferred.
0:06:15 > 0:06:19My dear, a small double room at the back in a place like this!
0:06:19 > 0:06:21You weren't so particular in Paris last autumn.
0:06:21 > 0:06:24It was quite different then. The exhibition was at its height.
0:06:24 > 0:06:26I realise that now. There's no need to rub it in.
0:06:29 > 0:06:32- We want a private suite with a bath. - Facing the mountain.- With a shower.
0:06:32 > 0:06:34- Hot and cold.- And a private thingummy, if you've got one.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37Well, I'm sorry gentlemen, the only things I've got is the maid's room.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40- What?- I'm sorry, the hotel is jammed to the sky.
0:06:40 > 0:06:42That's impossible, we haven't fixed up yet.
0:06:42 > 0:06:45You can't expect to put two of us up in the maid's room.
0:06:45 > 0:06:47Don't get excited, I'll remove the maid out.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50I should think so. What? What are you talking about?
0:06:50 > 0:06:53- I think I'd sooner sleep on the train.- Would you?
0:06:53 > 0:06:56- There is no 'eating in the train. - No eating?
0:06:56 > 0:06:59Yes, I mean, ha! Heating. Brrr!
0:06:59 > 0:07:02- Oh, heating, no heating.- That's awkward. All right, we'll take it.
0:07:02 > 0:07:03Just a minute, on one condition -
0:07:03 > 0:07:07you have to have the maid comes to your room and remove her wardrobe.
0:07:07 > 0:07:09Anna!
0:07:12 > 0:07:15She's a good girl, and I don't want to lose her.
0:07:15 > 0:07:19HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
0:07:31 > 0:07:34We'd better go and grab it.
0:07:34 > 0:07:37- Rather primitive humour. - Grown-up children, you know.
0:07:37 > 0:07:39That was rather an awkward situation over that girl.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41- Pity he couldn't have given us one each.- Eh?
0:07:41 > 0:07:44- I mean, er, a room apiece. - Oh.
0:07:46 > 0:07:51I, Iris Matilda Henderson, a spinster of no particular parish,
0:07:51 > 0:07:54do hereby solemnly renounce my maidenly past,
0:07:54 > 0:07:57and do declare that on Thursday next, the 26th inst,
0:07:57 > 0:08:02being in my right mind, I shall take the veil and the orange blossom,
0:08:02 > 0:08:05and change my name to Lady Charles Fotheringale.
0:08:06 > 0:08:09Can't you get him to change his name instead?
0:08:09 > 0:08:11The only thing I like about him is his moustache.
0:08:11 > 0:08:13You're a couple of cynics. I'm very fond of him.
0:08:13 > 0:08:16Well, I'm fond of rabbits, but they have to be kept down.
0:08:16 > 0:08:18Rudolf, give me a hand.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26Have you ever read about that little thing called love?
0:08:26 > 0:08:27It used to be very popular.
0:08:27 > 0:08:31Child, the carpet is already laid at St George's, Hanover Square,
0:08:31 > 0:08:34and father's simply aching to have a coat of arms on the jam label.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36To Iris and the happy days she's leaving behind.
0:08:36 > 0:08:40And the blue-blooded cheque-chaser she's dashing to London to marry.
0:08:40 > 0:08:43The blue-blooded cheque-chaser!
0:08:43 > 0:08:47I've no regrets. I've been everywhere and done everything.
0:08:50 > 0:08:53I've eaten caviar at Cannes, sausage rolls with the dogs.
0:08:53 > 0:08:57I've played baccarat at Biarritz and darts with the Rural Dean.
0:08:57 > 0:09:00What is there left for me but marriage?
0:09:05 > 0:09:09BOTH SPEAK GERMAN
0:09:17 > 0:09:19It's this hanging about that gets me.
0:09:19 > 0:09:22If only we knew what was happening in England.
0:09:22 > 0:09:24Mustn't lose grip, Charters. KNOCK AT DOOR
0:09:24 > 0:09:25Come in.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52SHE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:09:52 > 0:09:54- Did you follow that?- I did.
0:09:54 > 0:09:56Tell her this has gone far enough.
0:09:56 > 0:10:00There is no, er, no change, change here.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02Erm, outside.
0:10:02 > 0:10:04SHE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:10:06 > 0:10:09- She doesn't understand. - No. Come on.
0:10:09 > 0:10:11Ow!
0:10:53 > 0:10:55Nothing newer than last month.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57I don't suppose there's such a thing as a wireless set here.
0:10:57 > 0:11:01Awful being in the dark. Our communications cut off in a crisis.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03'Allo, 'allo. London?
0:11:03 > 0:11:07You want Mr Seltzer? Yes, hold on, I'm going right to find where he is.
0:11:09 > 0:11:10London!
0:11:14 > 0:11:15Go on, risk it.
0:11:17 > 0:11:19Hello. Hello, you, you in London.
0:11:19 > 0:11:21No, I'm not Mr Seltzer. Name's Charters.
0:11:21 > 0:11:24I don't suppose you know me.
0:11:24 > 0:11:26You needn't worry. They've just gone to fetch him.
0:11:26 > 0:11:28Tell me, what's happening to England?
0:11:30 > 0:11:33Blowing a gale? No, you don't follow me, sir.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36I'm enquiring about the Test match in Manchester.
0:11:36 > 0:11:39Cricket, sir, cricket! What, you don't know?
0:11:39 > 0:11:41You can't be in England and not know the Test score.
0:11:41 > 0:11:43- Fellow says he doesn't know. - Silly arse.
0:11:43 > 0:11:46Can't you find out? Oh, nonsense, it won't take a second.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49All right, if you won't, you won't.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51Wasting my time. The fellow's an ignoramus!
0:11:51 > 0:11:55Mr Seltzer, at last, your call come through to London.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Hello? Hello, hello?
0:11:57 > 0:11:59HE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:12:15 > 0:12:17THEY SPEAK OWN LANGUAGE
0:12:29 > 0:12:32HE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:12:32 > 0:12:34Thank you, waiter.
0:12:34 > 0:12:35What would you say to a grilled steak?
0:12:35 > 0:12:37That's a very good idea. Well done for me.
0:12:37 > 0:12:39On the red side for me.
0:12:39 > 0:12:41HE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:12:41 > 0:12:43They have a passion for repeating themselves.
0:12:43 > 0:12:45- I beg your pardon.- Mm-hm?
0:12:45 > 0:12:48He's trying to explain that, owing to the number of visitors,
0:12:48 > 0:12:50there's no food left.
0:12:50 > 0:12:53No food?! What sort of place is this?
0:12:53 > 0:12:55Expect us to share a blasted dog box
0:12:55 > 0:12:57with a servant girl on an empty stomach.
0:12:57 > 0:13:00Is that hospitality? Is that organisation?
0:13:00 > 0:13:02Oh, thank you.
0:13:03 > 0:13:07- I'm hungry.- What a country. I don't wonder they have revolutions.
0:13:07 > 0:13:09You're welcome to what's left of the cheese.
0:13:09 > 0:13:13- Of course, it's not steak, but it's rich in vitamins.- Really? Thank you.
0:13:13 > 0:13:16I am afraid they're not accustomed to catering for so many.
0:13:16 > 0:13:19- Bandrika is one of Europe's undiscovered corners.- Yes.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22That's probably cos there's nothing worth discovering, I should think.
0:13:22 > 0:13:24You may not know it as well as I do.
0:13:24 > 0:13:26I'm feeling quite miserable at the thought of leaving it.
0:13:26 > 0:13:30- After you with the cheese, please. - Why not? So you're going home?
0:13:30 > 0:13:33Tomorrow. My little charges are quite grown up.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35I'm a governess and music teacher, you know.
0:13:35 > 0:13:37In the six years I've lived here,
0:13:37 > 0:13:40I've grown to love the country, especially the mountains.
0:13:40 > 0:13:43I sometimes thinks they're like very friendly neighbours.
0:13:43 > 0:13:46The father and mother mountain, with their white snow hats,
0:13:46 > 0:13:50and their nephews and nieces, not quite so big, with smaller hats,
0:13:50 > 0:13:54right down to the tiniest hillock, without any hat at all.
0:13:54 > 0:13:57- Well, of course, that's just my fancy.- Oh, really?
0:13:57 > 0:14:00I like to watch them from my bedroom every night when there's a moon.
0:14:00 > 0:14:01I'm so glad there's a moon tonight.
0:14:01 > 0:14:03MAN SINGS
0:14:03 > 0:14:04Do you hear that music?
0:14:06 > 0:14:09Everyone sings here. The people are just like happy children,
0:14:09 > 0:14:12with laughter on their lips and music in their hearts.
0:14:12 > 0:14:14It's not reflected in their politics, you know.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17I never think you should judge a country by its politics.
0:14:17 > 0:14:21After all, we English are quite honest by nature, aren't we?
0:14:21 > 0:14:22You'll excuse me if I run away?
0:14:22 > 0:14:25- Goodnight.- Goodnight.
0:14:30 > 0:14:31Queer sort of bird.
0:14:33 > 0:14:34A trifle whimsical, I thought.
0:14:34 > 0:14:37After six years in this hole, we'd be whimsical.
0:14:37 > 0:14:42Oh, I don't think so, old man. She was very decent about that cheese.
0:14:42 > 0:14:44I see she's finished the pickles.
0:14:44 > 0:14:47Goodnight, Iris. Listen, someone's serenading.
0:14:47 > 0:14:50Oh, let him. Nothing'll keep me awake tonight.
0:14:50 > 0:14:51Goodnight, my children.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18MAN SINGS
0:15:36 > 0:15:39LOUD RHYTHMIC THUDS
0:15:52 > 0:15:55What's happening? An earthquake?
0:15:55 > 0:15:59That wouldn't account for the music, would it? What a horrible noise!
0:15:59 > 0:16:02- What can they be doing?- I don't know, but I'll soon find out.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07Hello?
0:16:07 > 0:16:09THUDDING CONTINUES
0:16:09 > 0:16:10Musical country, this.
0:16:10 > 0:16:14Yes, I feel quite sorry for that poor singer outside,
0:16:14 > 0:16:15having to compete with this.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18Boris, Miss Henderson speaking.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21Look, someone upstairs is playing musical chairs with an elephant.
0:16:21 > 0:16:25Move one of them out, will you? I want to get some sleep. All right.
0:16:25 > 0:16:27- That ought to settle it. - Thank you so much.
0:16:27 > 0:16:30Some people have so little consideration for others,
0:16:30 > 0:16:32which makes life so much more difficult than it need be,
0:16:32 > 0:16:35don't you think? Goodnight. Thank you so much.
0:16:35 > 0:16:38I expect you'll be going for the train in the morning.
0:16:38 > 0:16:40- Yes. - I hope we shall meet again under...
0:16:40 > 0:16:42Under quieter circumstances.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45- Goodnight.- Goodnight.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
0:16:48 > 0:16:52Miss, please, I'll fix everything.
0:16:52 > 0:16:53You'd better.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56THUDDING CONTINUES
0:17:06 > 0:17:09Hold it. Don't move, don't move.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13- HE CLEARS THROAT - Er...
0:17:16 > 0:17:20- ..if you please, sir...- Get out!
0:17:20 > 0:17:21One, two.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24THUDDING RESUMES
0:17:27 > 0:17:29Please, sir, will you kindly stop?
0:17:31 > 0:17:35They're all complaining in the hotel. You make too much noise.
0:17:39 > 0:17:41- Too much what?- Too much noise.
0:17:41 > 0:17:45You dare to call it a noise. The ancient music with which
0:17:45 > 0:17:49your peasant ancestors celebrated every wedding for generations.
0:17:49 > 0:17:52The dance they danced when your father married your mother,
0:17:52 > 0:17:55supposing you were born in wedlock, which I doubt. Look at them!
0:17:56 > 0:17:59- I take it you're the manager of this...- Sure, I am the manager!
0:17:59 > 0:18:02Fortunately, I'm accustomed to squalor. Tell me, who's complaining?
0:18:02 > 0:18:04This young English lady underneath.
0:18:04 > 0:18:06You tell the young English lady underneath
0:18:06 > 0:18:09that I am putting on record, for the benefit of mankind,
0:18:09 > 0:18:11one of the lost folk dances of central Europe.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14And furthermost, she does not own this hotel.
0:18:14 > 0:18:16Sir, don't you understand...?
0:18:16 > 0:18:18Now, one, two.
0:18:18 > 0:18:21THUDDING RESUMES
0:18:27 > 0:18:30You know what he said? "Who she think she is, the Queen of Sheba?
0:18:30 > 0:18:32"She think she owns this hotel?"
0:18:32 > 0:18:34- Can't you get rid of him? - Impossible!
0:18:36 > 0:18:39- Are you sure?- I begin to wonder.
0:18:40 > 0:18:42It's come back to me. I've got an idea.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45The German lady, she will call him on the telephone.
0:18:45 > 0:18:47She will say, "Young man, it's my room.
0:18:47 > 0:18:50- "I did pay for it. Get out quickly." How's that?- Good enough.
0:18:56 > 0:18:58Then shock him with a little sh!
0:18:58 > 0:19:01He'll never forget it as long as long as he live.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07Nothing but baseball.
0:19:07 > 0:19:09You know, we used to call it rounders.
0:19:09 > 0:19:12Children play it with a rubber ball and a stick.
0:19:12 > 0:19:15Not a word about cricket.
0:19:15 > 0:19:17Americans have got no sense of proportion.
0:19:17 > 0:19:18KNOCK ON DOOR
0:19:18 > 0:19:19Come in.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26HE WHISTLES
0:19:37 > 0:19:41HE WHISTLES
0:19:47 > 0:19:49SHE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:19:50 > 0:19:54I can't stand this ridiculous lack of privacy. Lock the door.
0:19:54 > 0:19:56Oh!
0:20:00 > 0:20:01SHE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:20:14 > 0:20:16Who are you? What do you want?
0:20:16 > 0:20:20HE PLAYS FIDDLE
0:20:20 > 0:20:23- Recognise the signature tune? - Will you please get out?
0:20:23 > 0:20:27Oh, this is a much better room. Definitely an acceptable room.
0:20:48 > 0:20:51What exactly do you think you're doing? Keep away.
0:20:55 > 0:20:57Would you hold those for a minute?
0:21:03 > 0:21:05Put those back at once.
0:21:06 > 0:21:10- Which side do you like to sleep? - Do you want me to throw you out?
0:21:10 > 0:21:12In that case, I'll sleep in the middle.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23Smart of you to bribe the manager.
0:21:32 > 0:21:36An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a toothbrush.
0:21:36 > 0:21:39I suppose you realise you're behaving like a complete cad.
0:21:39 > 0:21:42On the contrary. You're perfectly at liberty to sleep
0:21:42 > 0:21:44in the corridor, if you want to.
0:21:44 > 0:21:48- Hello? - Oh, I shouldn't, if I were you.
0:21:48 > 0:21:50I'd only tell everyone you invited me here.
0:21:55 > 0:22:00And when I say everyone, I mean everyone. I have a powerful voice.
0:22:01 > 0:22:02Come out of there at once!
0:22:02 > 0:22:05Not until you bribe the manager to restore me to my attic.
0:22:05 > 0:22:06Come out of that bathroom!
0:22:06 > 0:22:09HE SINGS
0:22:29 > 0:22:33Hello, Boris? Look, I was thinking,
0:22:33 > 0:22:36I might change my mind about that room upstairs if...
0:22:38 > 0:22:43Oh, by the way, you might have my things taken upstairs, would you?
0:22:46 > 0:22:50You're the most contemptible person I've ever met in all my life.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53- WHISPERS:- Confidentially, I think you're a bit of a stinker, too.
0:23:05 > 0:23:10MAN SINGS
0:23:20 > 0:23:23HE CHOKES
0:23:40 > 0:23:43SHE SINGS TO HERSELF
0:23:50 > 0:23:53ACCORDION MUSIC PLAYS
0:24:02 > 0:24:04I hope to get to Basle on time.
0:24:04 > 0:24:06- We should see the last day of the match.- Hope the weather's like this
0:24:06 > 0:24:09in Manchester. Perfect wicket for our fellas.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14- Isn't it somewhere along here? - If you don't hurry, Margaret,
0:24:14 > 0:24:17- we shan't get a compartment to ourselves.- Does it matter?
0:24:24 > 0:24:26- Well, there's still time to change your mind, Iris.- Yes.
0:24:26 > 0:24:29Why not send Charles a telegram, tell him he's all washed up?
0:24:29 > 0:24:33No, it's too late. This time next week, I shall be a sunburnt offering
0:24:33 > 0:24:34on an altar in Hanover Square.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37I shan't mind, really.
0:24:37 > 0:24:40Oh, good morning.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42I can't find my bag.
0:24:42 > 0:24:44It's a brown holdall. Have you seen...?
0:24:44 > 0:24:47No, of course not. Thank you. I gave it to the porter...
0:24:49 > 0:24:51Oh, she dropped her glasses.
0:24:55 > 0:24:58- You dropped your glasses. - Thank you.- Oh!
0:24:58 > 0:25:00Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear. Oh, my dear.
0:25:00 > 0:25:01Darling, are you hurt?
0:25:02 > 0:25:05I don't know. What was it?
0:25:05 > 0:25:07HE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:25:07 > 0:25:10Never mind about that. This cockeyed station has brained my friend!
0:25:10 > 0:25:12- Yes, indeed. - What are you going to do about it?
0:25:12 > 0:25:14- HE SPEAKS GERMAN - He says he can't hold the train.
0:25:14 > 0:25:15HE BLOWS WHISTLE
0:25:15 > 0:25:17- Hurry up, it's going! - Yes, my dear.
0:25:17 > 0:25:20- I'll be all right. - Are you sure? Be careful.
0:25:20 > 0:25:23Don't worry, I'll look after her. Such carelessness.
0:25:31 > 0:25:33You sure you're all right?
0:25:33 > 0:25:37- Send us a copy of The Times. Write and tell us all about it.- Good luck.
0:25:37 > 0:25:39Look after yourself.
0:26:10 > 0:26:13There, there. You'll be all right in a minute.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16Just take everything quietly.
0:26:16 > 0:26:18Put some of this eau de Cologne on your head.
0:26:39 > 0:26:42- Do you feel any better? - Yes, thank you. I'm all right now.
0:26:42 > 0:26:45What you need is a good strong cup of tea.
0:26:45 > 0:26:47- I'll ring for the attendant. - No, no, please don't bother.
0:26:47 > 0:26:50I'll go to the dining car myself. I need some air.
0:26:50 > 0:26:51Oh, well, in that case, I'll come with you.
0:26:51 > 0:26:54- If you don't mind, that is. - No, of course not.
0:27:08 > 0:27:12Oh, I beg your pardon. I'm so sorry.
0:27:12 > 0:27:15You can always tell a honeymoon couple, you know. They're so shy.
0:27:17 > 0:27:19- Why did you do that? - We don't want people staring at us.
0:27:19 > 0:27:22Anyone would think the whole legal profession were dogging you.
0:27:22 > 0:27:23One would be enough.
0:27:23 > 0:27:26You thought that beggar in Damascus was a barrister in disguise.
0:27:26 > 0:27:28I merely said his face was distinguished enough for a judge.
0:27:28 > 0:27:30You hurried off in the opposite direction, I noticed.
0:27:30 > 0:27:33That's not true. I was looking for a street called Street.
0:27:33 > 0:27:36- You weren't so careful the first two days.- I know, I know.
0:27:36 > 0:27:39And anyways, as for you meeting someone you know, what about me?
0:27:39 > 0:27:41Robert thinks I'm cruising with mother.
0:27:50 > 0:27:52If one's feeling a little bit shaky,
0:27:52 > 0:27:55I always think it's best to sit in the middle of the coach,
0:27:55 > 0:27:57preferably facing the engine.
0:27:57 > 0:28:00- A pot of tea for two, please. - Very good.- Oh, and just a minute.
0:28:02 > 0:28:06Will you please tell them to make it from this? I don't drink any other.
0:28:06 > 0:28:09And make absolutely sure that the water is really boiling.
0:28:09 > 0:28:10You understand?
0:28:11 > 0:28:14It's a little fad of mine. My father and mother -
0:28:14 > 0:28:17who, I'm thankful to say are still alive and enjoying
0:28:17 > 0:28:19good health - invariably drink it.
0:28:19 > 0:28:21And so I follow their footsteps.
0:28:21 > 0:28:23Do you know, a million Mexicans drink it?
0:28:23 > 0:28:26At least, that's what it says on the packet.
0:28:26 > 0:28:27It's kind of you to help me like this.
0:28:27 > 0:28:30I don't think we've introduced ourselves.
0:28:30 > 0:28:32- My name is Iris Henderson. I'm going home to be married.- Really?
0:28:32 > 0:28:36- How very exciting. I do hope you'll be happy.- Thank you.
0:28:36 > 0:28:39You'll have children, won't you? They make such a difference.
0:28:39 > 0:28:42I always think it's being with kiddies so much that's made me,
0:28:42 > 0:28:44if I may say so, young for my age.
0:28:44 > 0:28:46I'm a governess, you know. My name's Froy.
0:28:46 > 0:28:48WHISTLE BLASTS
0:28:48 > 0:28:52- Did you say Flora?- Froy. - I'm sorry, I can't hear.
0:29:04 > 0:29:06Froy. It rhymes with joy.
0:29:06 > 0:29:09Thank you. Please reserve two places for lunch.
0:29:09 > 0:29:12- That is, if you care to have it with me?- Of course.
0:29:12 > 0:29:15There's nothing moot about it, it simply wasn't out, that's all.
0:29:15 > 0:29:17But for the umpire's blunder, he'd still be batting.
0:29:17 > 0:29:18What do you mean? I don't understand.
0:29:18 > 0:29:21I'll show you. Look here, I saw the whole thing.
0:29:23 > 0:29:28Now then, there's Hammond, there's the bowler, there's the umpire.
0:29:28 > 0:29:31- Sugar?- Two, please.
0:29:31 > 0:29:33Dear me, there is no sugar.
0:29:34 > 0:29:38Now watch this very, very carefully, Caldicott. Grimmet was bowling...
0:29:38 > 0:29:40May I trouble you for the sugar, please?
0:29:40 > 0:29:43- What?- The sugar, please.
0:29:47 > 0:29:49HE SIGHS
0:29:59 > 0:30:00Thank you so much.
0:30:13 > 0:30:16If I were you, I'd try and get a little sleep.
0:30:16 > 0:30:18It'll make you feel quite well again.
0:30:18 > 0:30:20There's an intriguing acrostic in The Needlewoman.
0:30:20 > 0:30:24I'm going to try and unravel it before you wake up.
0:30:33 > 0:30:35BOTH LAUGH
0:30:38 > 0:30:40SHE SINGS TO HERSELF
0:31:13 > 0:31:17WHISTLE BLASTS
0:31:33 > 0:31:36HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
0:31:36 > 0:31:37Reservations for lunch, please.
0:31:42 > 0:31:43Madam has booked for lunch?
0:31:43 > 0:31:46I think my friend did. She's got the tickets.
0:31:53 > 0:31:55- Have you seen my friend?- No?
0:31:55 > 0:31:57Erm, my friend, where is she?
0:31:59 > 0:32:03La signora Inglese, the English lady, where is she?
0:32:03 > 0:32:05- There has been no English lady here.- What?
0:32:06 > 0:32:10There has been no English lady here.
0:32:10 > 0:32:12There has. She sat there, in the corner.
0:32:12 > 0:32:14You saw her, you spoke to her. She sat next to you.
0:32:16 > 0:32:17But it's ridiculous.
0:32:17 > 0:32:19She took me to the dining car and came back here with me.
0:32:19 > 0:32:21You went and came back alone.
0:32:22 > 0:32:23Maybe you don't understand -
0:32:23 > 0:32:26I mean the lady who looked after me when I was knocked out.
0:32:26 > 0:32:29Ah, perhaps it make you forget, eh?
0:32:29 > 0:32:32I may be very dense, but if this is some part of a joke,
0:32:32 > 0:32:33I'm afraid I don't see the point.
0:33:07 > 0:33:09- Oh, steward, you served me tea just now.- Yes, madam.
0:33:09 > 0:33:11Have you seen the lady I was with? The English lady?
0:33:11 > 0:33:13But madam was alone.
0:33:13 > 0:33:15Pardon, madam, he make mistake.
0:33:15 > 0:33:18Well, of course. He must remember the little English lady.
0:33:18 > 0:33:20- She ordered the tea and paid for it. - No, it is you who paid.
0:33:20 > 0:33:22BOTH SPEAK ITALIAN
0:33:22 > 0:33:23He say to look at the bill.
0:33:23 > 0:33:25But she gave you a special packet of tea.
0:33:25 > 0:33:26You can't have forgotten that.
0:33:26 > 0:33:29The tea was ours, madam. I received no packet.
0:33:29 > 0:33:32- But you did. I know what happened. - Pardon, madam, the bill.
0:33:32 > 0:33:35- Er, tea for one. - But that's not right.
0:33:35 > 0:33:38Perhaps madam would care to examine the bills herself?
0:33:38 > 0:33:40No, I wouldn't. The whole thing's too absurd.
0:33:47 > 0:33:50Please, have you seen a lady pass through...? Oh.
0:33:50 > 0:33:52Well, if it isn't old stinker.
0:33:52 > 0:33:54If I thought you'd be on this train,
0:33:54 > 0:33:56I'd have stayed another week in the hotel. Er, lady, no. Why?
0:33:56 > 0:33:59Doesn't matter. You probably wouldn't recognise one anyway.
0:34:03 > 0:34:06- Hello? Feeling queer? - It's that pipe of yours, George.
0:34:06 > 0:34:09Why don't you throw your old socks away? Thanks for the help.
0:34:09 > 0:34:11Oh, come on, sit down. Take it easy. What's the trouble?
0:34:11 > 0:34:14If you must know, something fell on my head.
0:34:14 > 0:34:15- When, infancy?- At the station.
0:34:15 > 0:34:19- Bad luck. Can I help? - Only by going away.
0:34:19 > 0:34:21No, no, no. My father always taught me, never desert a lady in trouble.
0:34:21 > 0:34:23He even carried that as far as marrying mother.
0:34:23 > 0:34:26Did you see a lady last night in the hotel in tweeds?
0:34:26 > 0:34:28I saw one lady - she was hardly in tweeds.
0:34:28 > 0:34:31Yes, but she was in my compartment, and now I can't find her.
0:34:31 > 0:34:34She must be still on the train. We haven't stopped since we started.
0:34:34 > 0:34:36Of course she's still on the train, I know that.
0:34:36 > 0:34:37All right. Nobody said she isn't.
0:34:37 > 0:34:40- That's just what they ARE saying. - Who?- The people in the compartment
0:34:40 > 0:34:42and the stewards. They insist they never saw her.
0:34:42 > 0:34:44- All of them?- All of them.
0:34:44 > 0:34:47- You said you got a knock on the head?- What do you mean?
0:34:47 > 0:34:49- Never mind. Do you talk the lingo? - No.
0:34:49 > 0:34:51They probably thought you were trying to borrow some money.
0:34:51 > 0:34:54Come on, let's knock the idea out of their stupid heads.
0:34:54 > 0:34:56That's the most unfortunate remark. I beg your pardon.
0:35:00 > 0:35:02That's one of them, the little dark man.
0:35:03 > 0:35:06I say, excuse me, I think there's been a misunderstanding.
0:35:06 > 0:35:09- This young lady seems to have lost her friend.- Yes, I have heard.
0:35:09 > 0:35:12This gentleman has been explaining to me. Most interesting.
0:35:12 > 0:35:16I think, under the circumstances, we shall all introduce ourselves.
0:35:16 > 0:35:18I am Italian citizen. My wife and child.
0:35:18 > 0:35:20How do you do? Bonny little chap. How old is he?
0:35:20 > 0:35:251934. And the lady in the corner is the Baroness Attorna.
0:35:25 > 0:35:28Yes. I met her husband. He presented prizes at the folk dance festival.
0:35:28 > 0:35:29Minister of Propaganda.
0:35:29 > 0:35:32I am Dr Egon Hartz of Prague, you may have heard of me.
0:35:32 > 0:35:35- Not the brain specialist? - Yes, the same.
0:35:35 > 0:35:37You flew over to England and operated on a cabinet minister.
0:35:37 > 0:35:40- Oh, yes. - Tell me, did you find anything?
0:35:40 > 0:35:41A slight cerebral contusion.
0:35:41 > 0:35:43Oh, well, that's better than nothing.
0:35:43 > 0:35:46I am picking up a similar case at the next station,
0:35:46 > 0:35:47but so much more complicated
0:35:47 > 0:35:49I shall operate at the National Hospital tonight.
0:35:49 > 0:35:52Among other things, a cranial fracture with compression.
0:35:52 > 0:35:55- Do you understand? - Oh, yes, a wallop on the bean.
0:35:55 > 0:35:58- I suppose you haven't seen my friend?- Unfortunately, no.
0:35:58 > 0:35:59I'll just take a word with the baroness.
0:36:01 > 0:36:06BOTH SPEAK ITALIAN
0:36:12 > 0:36:14- What do they say?- They both say that they've never seen her.
0:36:14 > 0:36:18- But that's not true. She was sitting where you are.- Can you describe her?
0:36:18 > 0:36:20It's difficult. You see, she was sort of middle-aged.
0:36:20 > 0:36:24- What was she wearing? - Tweeds. Oatmeal, flecked with brown,
0:36:24 > 0:36:27a three-quarter coat with patch pockets,
0:36:27 > 0:36:29a scarf, felt hat, brown shoes,
0:36:29 > 0:36:33a tussore shirt, and a small, blue handkerchief in her breast pocket.
0:36:33 > 0:36:36- I can't remember any more.- You couldn't have been paying attention.
0:36:36 > 0:36:38- Now listen, you both went along to tea?- Yes.
0:36:38 > 0:36:42- Well, surely you met somebody? - I suppose we did, but...
0:36:42 > 0:36:46Wait, let me think. There was an Englishman who passed the sugar.
0:36:46 > 0:36:47Right. Let's go and dig him out.
0:36:47 > 0:36:50I come with you. This is most interesting to me.
0:36:50 > 0:36:53We don't like people muscling in, but we'll make you a member.
0:37:00 > 0:37:02Wait a moment, there WAS somebody else.
0:37:02 > 0:37:04As we passed this compartment, Miss Froy stumbled in.
0:37:04 > 0:37:07- There was a tall gentleman and a lady.- Now we are getting somewhere.
0:37:07 > 0:37:10If we can find someone who saw her, we will have the place searched.
0:37:10 > 0:37:12- Can I be of any assistance? - That is the gentleman.
0:37:12 > 0:37:15Do you remember seeing this young lady pass the compartment
0:37:15 > 0:37:16with a little English woman?
0:37:16 > 0:37:22- I'm afraid not.- You must have, she almost fell into your compartment.
0:37:22 > 0:37:24Surely you haven't forgotten? It is very important.
0:37:24 > 0:37:27Everybody is saying she was not on the train but I know she is.
0:37:27 > 0:37:30I'm going to find her even if I have to stop the train to do it.
0:37:31 > 0:37:33This is Charters. Can I come in?
0:37:34 > 0:37:36You know that girl we saw at the hotel?
0:37:36 > 0:37:38She's back there kicking up a devil of a fuss.
0:37:38 > 0:37:39Says she's lost her friend.
0:37:39 > 0:37:43- She hasn't been in here.- The point is she threatens to stop the train.
0:37:43 > 0:37:47If we miss our connection, we'll never make Manchester in time.
0:37:47 > 0:37:49- This is serious.- Let's hide in here.
0:37:50 > 0:37:52Sorry, I haven't the faintest recollection.
0:37:52 > 0:37:54You must be making a mistake.
0:37:55 > 0:37:59He obviously doesn't remember. Let's look for the other fellow.
0:38:01 > 0:38:03- Who were you talking to outside? - Oh, nobody.
0:38:03 > 0:38:06Just some people in the corridor arguing.
0:38:12 > 0:38:16- There he is, there's the man.- I'm sorry. I wonder if I can bother you.
0:38:16 > 0:38:18- I wonder if you can help.- How?
0:38:18 > 0:38:20I was having tea about an hour ago with an English lady.
0:38:20 > 0:38:23- You saw her, didn't you? - I don't know.
0:38:23 > 0:38:26- I was talking to my friend, wasn't I?- Indubitably.- But you were sitting
0:38:26 > 0:38:28at the next table, she turned and borrowed the sugar.
0:38:28 > 0:38:31- You must remember.- Yes, I recall passing the sugar.- Then you saw her?
0:38:31 > 0:38:33We were deep in conversation about cricket.
0:38:33 > 0:38:34I don't see how a thing like cricket
0:38:34 > 0:38:36- can make you forget seeing people. - Don't you?
0:38:36 > 0:38:39If that is your attitude, there is nothing more to be said.
0:38:39 > 0:38:42Come, Caldicott. "A thing like cricket"!
0:38:42 > 0:38:44Wrong tactics, we should have told him we were looking for
0:38:44 > 0:38:46- a lost cricket ball. - But he spoke to her.
0:38:46 > 0:38:49- There must be some explanation. - There is. Please forgive me.
0:38:49 > 0:38:53I'm quite possibly wrong, but I have known cases where a sudden shock
0:38:53 > 0:38:56or blow has induced the most vivid impressions.
0:38:56 > 0:39:00- I understand. You don't believe me. - It is not a question of belief.
0:39:00 > 0:39:03Even a simple concussion may have curious effects upon
0:39:03 > 0:39:06- an imaginative person. - I can remember every little detail.
0:39:06 > 0:39:09Her name, Miss Froy, everything.
0:39:09 > 0:39:10So interesting.
0:39:10 > 0:39:14If one had time, one could trace the cause of the hallucination.
0:39:14 > 0:39:19- Hallucination?- Precisely. There is no Miss Froy. There never was.
0:39:19 > 0:39:22- Merely a vivid subjective image.- But I met her last night at the hotel.
0:39:22 > 0:39:26- You thought you did.- What about the name?- Some past association.
0:39:26 > 0:39:30An advertisement or a character in a novel, subconsciously remembered.
0:39:30 > 0:39:35There is no reason to be frightened, if you are quiet and relax.
0:39:35 > 0:39:36Thank you very much.
0:39:45 > 0:39:49If you will excuse me, this is where my patient comes aboard. Excuse me.
0:39:50 > 0:39:52Most interesting.
0:39:53 > 0:39:55Stopping.
0:39:55 > 0:39:57- This is the first stop, isn't it? - Mm-hm.
0:39:57 > 0:40:00Then Miss Froy must still be on the train. You look out of this window
0:40:00 > 0:40:03and see if she gets off this side. I'll take the other.
0:40:04 > 0:40:06Most interesting.
0:40:12 > 0:40:16- What was she dressed in? Scotch tweeds, wasn't it?- Oatmeal tweeds.
0:40:16 > 0:40:19I knew it had something to do with porridge.
0:40:25 > 0:40:30THEY SPEAK OWN LANGUAGE
0:40:44 > 0:40:48How long does it take to get a divorce? Eric.
0:40:48 > 0:40:50I beg your pardon, I wasn't listening.
0:40:50 > 0:40:55- I said, how long does it take to get a divorce?- That depends. Why?
0:40:55 > 0:40:59Only wondering whether we could take our honeymoon next spring.
0:40:59 > 0:41:00I mean the official one.
0:41:00 > 0:41:02The difficulties are considerable.
0:41:02 > 0:41:05For one thing, the courts are very crowded just now.
0:41:05 > 0:41:08Although I suppose we barristers ought not to complain about that.
0:41:08 > 0:41:11As a matter of fact, with the conditions as they are now,
0:41:11 > 0:41:13my chances of becoming a judge are very rosy.
0:41:13 > 0:41:15That is if nothing untoward occurs.
0:41:15 > 0:41:18Such as you being mixed up in a divorce case yourself.
0:41:18 > 0:41:20Yes.
0:41:20 > 0:41:22In the first careless rapture of yours,
0:41:22 > 0:41:24you said you didn't care what happened.
0:41:24 > 0:41:26You must think of it from my point of view.
0:41:26 > 0:41:28The law, like Caesar's wife, must be above suspicion.
0:41:28 > 0:41:32- Even when the law spends six weeks with Caesar's wife?- Look here.
0:41:32 > 0:41:35Now I know why you've been running around like a scared rabbit,
0:41:35 > 0:41:37why you lied so deliberately a few minutes ago.
0:41:37 > 0:41:40- I lied?- Yes, to those people in the corridor.
0:41:40 > 0:41:42I heard every word you said.
0:41:42 > 0:41:45It was merely I didn't wish to be mixed up in any enquiry.
0:41:45 > 0:41:49"Enquiry"! Just because a little woman can't be found.
0:41:49 > 0:41:51That girl was making a fuss. If the woman had disappeared
0:41:51 > 0:41:54and I had admitted seeing her, we might become vital witnesses.
0:41:54 > 0:41:58My name might even appear in the papers, coupled with yours.
0:41:58 > 0:42:02- A scandal like that might lead anywhere. Anywhere.- Yes.
0:42:03 > 0:42:05I suppose it might.
0:42:10 > 0:42:12WHISTLE BLASTS
0:42:25 > 0:42:27- Nobody?- Nobody.
0:42:27 > 0:42:30The only thing that came out of my side was two bits of orange peel and
0:42:30 > 0:42:33- a paper bag.- I know there's a Miss Froy. She's as real as you are.
0:42:33 > 0:42:36You say that, but there doesn't appear to be anybody else
0:42:36 > 0:42:38- who's seen her. - I saw her, I think.
0:42:39 > 0:42:43- You did?- A little woman in tweeds wearing a three-quarter coat.
0:42:43 > 0:42:45- With a scarf?- That's right.
0:42:45 > 0:42:48- I saw her with you when you passed the compartment.- I knew I was right!
0:42:48 > 0:42:50But your husband said he hadn't seen her.
0:42:50 > 0:42:53- He didn't notice, but as soon he mentioned I remembered.- You win.
0:42:53 > 0:42:56This calls for action. Are you prepared to make a statement?
0:42:56 > 0:42:59- Of course, if it helps. - Pardon. My patient has arrived.
0:42:59 > 0:43:01The most fascinating complication.
0:43:01 > 0:43:03We have some news. This lady actually saw Miss Froy.
0:43:03 > 0:43:05We'll have the train searched.
0:43:05 > 0:43:07You'll have to think of a fresh theory now, Doctor.
0:43:07 > 0:43:09It is not necessary - my theory was perfectly good.
0:43:09 > 0:43:13The facts were misleading. I hope you find your friend. Excuse me.
0:43:13 > 0:43:16- I will be in here if you want me. - Right you are. Come along.
0:43:20 > 0:43:22Eric.
0:43:24 > 0:43:27I was only going to mention that I told that girl I'd seen her friend.
0:43:27 > 0:43:30What's that? Have you taken leave of your senses?
0:43:30 > 0:43:33- On the contrary, I have come to them.- What do you mean?
0:43:33 > 0:43:35If there is a scandal, there would be a divorce.
0:43:35 > 0:43:37You could not let me down.
0:43:37 > 0:43:41You'd have to do the decent thing as reluctantly as you know.
0:43:41 > 0:43:44You forget one very important thing. Your husband would divorce you,
0:43:44 > 0:43:47but whatever happens, my wife will never divorce me.
0:43:49 > 0:43:50It may seem crazy to you
0:43:50 > 0:43:53- but I tell you you're going to search the train.- Signorina!
0:43:53 > 0:43:56Down there, they look for you. Your friend, she come back.
0:43:56 > 0:44:01- Come back?- Si.- What happened? - You go see. She tell you. Scusi.
0:44:01 > 0:44:05Thanks. Relax. The crisis is over.
0:44:05 > 0:44:06Come on, let's join the lady.
0:44:08 > 0:44:09- Here we are.- Miss Froy!
0:44:13 > 0:44:15That isn't Miss Froy.
0:44:15 > 0:44:20- Isn't it?- No.- It is a silly thing to say, but are you Miss Froy?
0:44:21 > 0:44:24No, I am Madame Kummer.
0:44:24 > 0:44:27SHE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:44:27 > 0:44:29She says she helped you into the carriage after you got
0:44:29 > 0:44:31hit on the head then went to see some friends.
0:44:31 > 0:44:33SHE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:44:33 > 0:44:36The baroness says that as you spoke about an English lady,
0:44:36 > 0:44:39- she did not connect her with Madame Kummer.- She wasn't the lady I saw.
0:44:39 > 0:44:42- It was Miss Froy.- Oatmeal tweeds, blouse, handkerchief.
0:44:42 > 0:44:44I know, everything is the same, but it isn't her.
0:44:44 > 0:44:48- When did you say you first met Miss Froy?- Last night at the hotel.
0:44:48 > 0:44:52- Was she wearing a costume like that? - Yes.
0:44:52 > 0:44:54Then I must apologise, you did meet her after all.
0:44:54 > 0:44:58But not on this train. In your subconscious mind,
0:44:58 > 0:45:00you substituted the face of Madame Kummer for Miss Froy.
0:45:00 > 0:45:03But I didn't. I couldn't have, I tell you, I talked to her here.
0:45:03 > 0:45:04That's very easily settled,
0:45:04 > 0:45:06as an English woman on the train who said she saw her.
0:45:06 > 0:45:09- If this lady wouldn't mind... - THEY SPEAK OWN LANGUAGE
0:45:12 > 0:45:14What a gift for languages the fellow's got.
0:45:25 > 0:45:27Would you tell us, is this the woman you saw?
0:45:27 > 0:45:29It isn't a bit like her, is it?
0:45:32 > 0:45:33Yes, she's the woman.
0:45:35 > 0:45:37- But it isn't, I tell you. - Are you sure?
0:45:39 > 0:45:42- Perfectly.- She isn't, she isn't!
0:45:42 > 0:45:43SHE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:45:46 > 0:45:49Come on, then. I'm so sorry to have troubled you.
0:45:51 > 0:45:54Well? Aren't you going to say anything?
0:45:54 > 0:45:56You might at least gloat, if nothing else.
0:45:56 > 0:45:59You only did it to save your own skin.
0:45:59 > 0:46:03She was lying. I saw it in her face. They're all lying, but why?
0:46:03 > 0:46:04Why don't you sit down? Take it easy.
0:46:04 > 0:46:07Do you think I substituted Miss Froy's face for Madame Kummer's?
0:46:07 > 0:46:10I think any change would be an improvement.
0:46:10 > 0:46:11Miss Froy was on this train,
0:46:11 > 0:46:15and nothing will convince me otherwise.
0:46:15 > 0:46:17Must you follow me round like a pet dog?
0:46:17 > 0:46:20Let's say a watchdog - I've got all the better instincts.
0:46:20 > 0:46:21Goodbye.
0:46:40 > 0:46:42The doctor was right, I never saw Miss Froy on the train.
0:46:42 > 0:46:44It didn't happen, I know now.
0:46:44 > 0:46:47I'm glad you're going to take it like that. Forget all about it.
0:46:47 > 0:46:50Make your mind a complete blank.
0:46:50 > 0:46:51Watch me, you can't go wrong.
0:46:53 > 0:46:55What about something to eat?
0:46:55 > 0:46:57- Anything.- That's right. Come along.
0:47:06 > 0:47:09- Would you like a little air? - Thanks.
0:47:11 > 0:47:13- Do you think you can eat anything? - I could try.
0:47:13 > 0:47:16That's the spirit. You'll feel a different girl tomorrow.
0:47:16 > 0:47:20I hope so. I don't want to meet my fiance a nervous wreck.
0:47:20 > 0:47:22Your what?
0:47:22 > 0:47:24I'm being married on Thursday.
0:47:24 > 0:47:27- Quite sure you're not imagining that?- Positive.
0:47:27 > 0:47:30Oh, I was afraid so. Ah, food.
0:47:30 > 0:47:33- I couldn't face it. - Mind if I talk with my mouth full?
0:47:33 > 0:47:37- If you must.- Now then, would you like to hear about my early life?
0:47:37 > 0:47:40- I don't think so.- Well, since you press me, I'll begin with my father.
0:47:40 > 0:47:44It's remarkable how many great men began with their father. Drink?
0:47:44 > 0:47:46A cup of tea, please.
0:47:49 > 0:47:51My father was a very colourful character,
0:47:51 > 0:47:53and he was strongly addicted to...
0:47:53 > 0:47:55You'll never guess.
0:47:55 > 0:47:58- Harriman's Herbal Tea. - No! Double Scotch.
0:47:58 > 0:48:01- A million Mexicans drink it. - Maybe they do, but Father didn't.
0:48:01 > 0:48:04Miss Froy gave the waiter a packet of it.
0:48:04 > 0:48:07- A packet of what? - Harriman's Herbal Tea.
0:48:07 > 0:48:08She said it was the only sort she liked.
0:48:08 > 0:48:11We agreed you'd make your mind a complete blank.
0:48:11 > 0:48:15- But it's so real, I'm sure it happened.- Did we or did we not?
0:48:15 > 0:48:18We did. Sorry.
0:48:18 > 0:48:20Go on telling me about your father.
0:48:20 > 0:48:22My father was a very remarkable man.
0:48:22 > 0:48:25- Did he play the clarinet? - Incessantly.
0:48:25 > 0:48:28In fact, he never put it down unless it was absolutely necessary.
0:48:28 > 0:48:31Naturally, I couldn't help inheriting his love of music.
0:48:31 > 0:48:34- Why not?- It was all he left me.
0:48:34 > 0:48:37You know, you're remarkably attractive.
0:48:37 > 0:48:39Has anyone ever told you?
0:48:39 > 0:48:40We were discussing you.
0:48:40 > 0:48:43- Yes, of course. Do you like me? - Not much.
0:48:46 > 0:48:49After I'd paid my father's debts, I started to travel,
0:48:49 > 0:48:50until they tried to cash the cheques.
0:48:50 > 0:48:54I'm writing a book now. Would you like to buy a copy?
0:48:54 > 0:48:56I'd love to. When does it see the light of day?
0:48:56 > 0:48:58About four years.
0:48:58 > 0:49:01- That's a very long time. - It's a very long book.
0:49:03 > 0:49:06Do you know why you fascinate me? I'll tell you.
0:49:06 > 0:49:08You have got two great qualities I admired in Father -
0:49:08 > 0:49:12you haven't any manners at all, and you're always seeing things.
0:49:13 > 0:49:16- What's the matter?- Look!
0:49:16 > 0:49:18WHISTLE BLASTS
0:49:22 > 0:49:25- It's gone!- What's gone?
0:49:25 > 0:49:26Miss Froy's name on the window.
0:49:26 > 0:49:29You saw it. You must have seen it! She's on the train!
0:49:29 > 0:49:30No, steady, steady.
0:49:30 > 0:49:32Excuse me, thank you very much.
0:49:32 > 0:49:37We've got to find her. Something's happening to her. Stop the train!
0:49:37 > 0:49:40Listen, everybody, there's a woman on this train - Miss Froy.
0:49:40 > 0:49:42Some of you must have seen her. They're hiding her somewhere.
0:49:42 > 0:49:45I appeal to you, all of you, to stop the train.
0:49:45 > 0:49:47Please help me. Make them stop the train.
0:49:47 > 0:49:50Why don't you do something before it's too late?
0:49:50 > 0:49:53- Please. - You think I'm crazy, but I'm not.
0:49:53 > 0:49:56For heaven's sake, stop this train! Leave me alone!
0:49:56 > 0:49:57Leave me alone!
0:49:57 > 0:50:00WHISTLE BLASTS
0:50:01 > 0:50:05BRAKES SQUEAL
0:50:12 > 0:50:15Huh! Ten minutes late, thanks to that fool of a girl.
0:50:15 > 0:50:20She gets up to any more tricks, we'll be too late for the match.
0:50:20 > 0:50:23- I suppose you couldn't put it to her in some way?- What?
0:50:23 > 0:50:27Well, people just don't vanish, and so forth.
0:50:27 > 0:50:29- She has.- What?
0:50:29 > 0:50:32- Vanished.- Who?- The old dame.
0:50:33 > 0:50:35- Yes.- Well?
0:50:36 > 0:50:38- Well, how could she?- What?
0:50:40 > 0:50:42- Vanish.- I don't know.
0:50:42 > 0:50:47That explains my point. People don't just disappear into thin air.
0:50:47 > 0:50:50- It's done in India.- What?
0:50:50 > 0:50:53- The rope trick.- Oh, that.
0:50:53 > 0:50:55It never comes out in a photograph.
0:50:56 > 0:51:00Look, in half an hour we'll stop at Morshkan, just before the border.
0:51:00 > 0:51:04I will leave there with my patient for the National Hospital.
0:51:04 > 0:51:07If you come with me, you can stay overnight in a private ward.
0:51:07 > 0:51:11- You need peace and rest. - Sorry, nothing doing.
0:51:11 > 0:51:13Isn't there anything we can do?
0:51:13 > 0:51:14Yes. Find Miss Froy.
0:51:21 > 0:51:25I tell you, if she does not rest, I will not answer for her.
0:51:25 > 0:51:27It will be best if you persuade her. She likes you.
0:51:27 > 0:51:30I'm as popular as a dose of strychnine.
0:51:30 > 0:51:33If you coat it with sugar, she may swallow it.
0:52:14 > 0:52:17Cosmopolitan train, this. People of all nations.
0:52:19 > 0:52:23I've just seen at least a million Mexicans in the corridor.
0:52:25 > 0:52:28I thought I'd look in to tell you to think over what Dr Hartz said.
0:52:28 > 0:52:31If you fell like changing your mind, I'll be hanging around.
0:52:39 > 0:52:42- What's all the mystery?- You're right, Miss Froy is on this train.
0:52:42 > 0:52:45I've just seen the packet of tea you were talking about in the rubbish.
0:52:45 > 0:52:47- Trifle late, aren't you? She may be dead now.- Dead or...
0:52:47 > 0:52:49For sheer variety, give me an English summer.
0:52:49 > 0:52:52I remember once spending a bank holiday at...
0:52:52 > 0:52:55We'll search the train. There's something definitely queer in here.
0:53:12 > 0:53:15- Looks like a supply service for trunk murderers.- Don't!
0:53:23 > 0:53:24Look at that!
0:53:28 > 0:53:31- It's all right, Miss Froy, it's only us.- Hurry up, quickly!
0:53:38 > 0:53:41Perhaps it's Miss Froy bewitched, you never know!
0:53:41 > 0:53:44I refuse to be discouraged. Faint heart never found old lady.
0:53:46 > 0:53:48- Do you know anything about her?- No.
0:53:48 > 0:53:51Only that she was a governess going back home.
0:53:55 > 0:53:57- What is this thing?- Can't imagine.
0:53:57 > 0:53:59There might be something down here.
0:54:02 > 0:54:05- What on earth...? - Our Italian friend!
0:54:05 > 0:54:06I've got it! Wait a minute.
0:54:08 > 0:54:09There you are, the Great Doppo.
0:54:16 > 0:54:19- His visiting card, look. - What's it say?
0:54:19 > 0:54:21The Great Doppo, magician, illusionist, mind-reader...
0:54:21 > 0:54:25see his fascinating act, the vanishing...
0:54:25 > 0:54:28- ..lady.- The vanishing lady?!
0:54:28 > 0:54:32- Perhaps that's the explanation. - What?- He's practising on Miss Froy.
0:54:32 > 0:54:35- Perhaps it's a publicity stunt.- No.
0:54:35 > 0:54:37What about the Baroness and Madame Kummer?
0:54:37 > 0:54:42- What's your theory?- I don't know. My theory? I'll tell you.
0:54:47 > 0:54:49Oh, dear! I can't get...
0:54:59 > 0:55:03- Where are you?- In here, with a strong smell of camphor ball.
0:55:03 > 0:55:05- I can't see you. - I'm about somewhere.
0:55:07 > 0:55:10Here I am. Where are you?
0:55:10 > 0:55:12I don't know!
0:55:12 > 0:55:14This is what comes of not saying abracadabra.
0:55:14 > 0:55:17- Ooh! Ooh!- Are you hurt?
0:55:17 > 0:55:19- Come on, out of it.- Not much.
0:55:19 > 0:55:22- Come and sit down.- What is that?
0:55:22 > 0:55:25In magic circles, we call it the disappearing cabinet.
0:55:25 > 0:55:28- You get inside, and you vanish. - So I noticed.
0:55:28 > 0:55:30You were about to tell me of your theory.
0:55:30 > 0:55:33Oh, my theory. Well...
0:55:33 > 0:55:37my theory, my dear Watson, is that we are in very deep waters indeed.
0:55:37 > 0:55:40- Ahem.- Oh! Thank you very much.
0:55:40 > 0:55:43Let us marshal our facts over a pipe full of Baker Street shag.
0:55:43 > 0:55:45In the first place, a little old lady disappears.
0:55:45 > 0:55:49Everyone who saw her insists she was never there, right?
0:55:49 > 0:55:51- Right.- We know that she was, therefore
0:55:51 > 0:55:54they did see her, therefore they are deliberately lying.
0:55:54 > 0:55:56- Why?- I don't know. I'm only Watson.
0:55:56 > 0:55:59Don't bury yourself in the part. I'll tell you why -
0:55:59 > 0:56:02they daren't face an enquiry as Miss Froy's probably still on this train.
0:56:02 > 0:56:06- I told you that hours ago. - Yes, so you did.
0:56:06 > 0:56:09- For that, my dear Watson, you shall have a cigar.- Ooh, thank you.
0:56:09 > 0:56:12Only one thing left to do - search the train in disguise.
0:56:12 > 0:56:15- As what?- Well, er...
0:56:16 > 0:56:19- Old English gentleman. - They'd see through you.
0:56:19 > 0:56:21Perhaps you're right. Aha!
0:56:23 > 0:56:24Will Hay.
0:56:24 > 0:56:28Now, boys, boys, which of you has stolen Miss Froy? Own up!
0:56:28 > 0:56:31- Give those glasses to me.- Why?
0:56:31 > 0:56:33- They're Miss Froy's! - Are you sure?
0:56:33 > 0:56:36Yes, they're exactly the same. Gold rims... Where did you find them?
0:56:36 > 0:56:39- Down here on the floor. The glass is broken.- Probably in the struggle.
0:56:40 > 0:56:43Do you realise that this is our first piece of tangible proof?
0:56:45 > 0:56:46That's the lot.
0:56:51 > 0:56:52Will you please give me those spectacles?
0:56:52 > 0:56:55They belong to me. My spectacles, please.
0:56:55 > 0:56:58- Yours? Are you sure? - HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
0:57:00 > 0:57:04Naughty, naughty. That's a large nose for a small pair of spectacles.
0:57:05 > 0:57:07That's the game, is it? We'll see about that.
0:57:07 > 0:57:09They're Miss Froy's glasses, and you know it.
0:57:09 > 0:57:11She's been here, and you know that too!
0:57:22 > 0:57:25Don't stand hopping about there like a referee, kick him!
0:57:25 > 0:57:28See if he's got a false bottom. Hang on, I'll get him up.
0:57:34 > 0:57:36Ow! That doesn't help.
0:57:40 > 0:57:43Quick, pull his ears back. Give them a twist.
0:57:48 > 0:57:49Now I've got him.
0:58:04 > 0:58:06He's got a knife!
0:58:08 > 0:58:11Get hold of it before he cuts a slice off me.
0:58:12 > 0:58:13I can't reach it.
0:58:22 > 0:58:24Argh!
0:58:24 > 0:58:26Well done, that's it. That's it.
0:58:30 > 0:58:33We know how that thing works. Come out of there.
0:58:35 > 0:58:39Is he out? We've got to hide him somewhere.
0:58:39 > 0:58:42- What's in here?- Hurry up, quick, before he comes to.
0:58:46 > 0:58:47It's empty. We can lock him in.
0:58:50 > 0:58:51Come on.
0:58:54 > 0:58:55Oh, no, you don't!
0:58:59 > 0:59:02- Oh!- What's the matter?
0:59:02 > 0:59:04Garlic. I'll be all right in a minute.
0:59:04 > 0:59:07- Here, let's tie him up.- Oh, yes.
0:59:07 > 0:59:10So we definitely know that Miss Froy was on this train,
0:59:10 > 0:59:13and our friend in here had something to do with it.
0:59:13 > 0:59:16That ought to keep him quiet until we find her.
0:59:16 > 0:59:19Hard work, but worth it. Let's have the evidence.
0:59:19 > 0:59:21- Evidence?- The glasses.
0:59:21 > 0:59:24- You've got them. - No, I haven't got them.
0:59:24 > 0:59:26- Oh!- He's got them!
0:59:28 > 0:59:30He isn't there!
0:59:34 > 0:59:36Snookered! It's a false bottom.
0:59:39 > 0:59:41- The twister! He's a contortionist. - He's gone.
0:59:41 > 0:59:46To find the others. We can't fight the whole train, we need allies.
0:59:46 > 0:59:48- But who can we trust? - That's the snag.
0:59:48 > 0:59:51There's that Dr Hartz person.
0:59:51 > 0:59:53Yes, you're right. He might help. Let's tell him the symptoms.
0:59:53 > 0:59:55All right. Oh, wait a minute.
1:00:08 > 1:00:09This is the one.
1:00:15 > 1:00:16He's not there.
1:00:20 > 1:00:23Listen, I've just had a particularly idiotic idea.
1:00:23 > 1:00:27- I quite believe that.- Supposing that patient is Miss Froy.
1:00:27 > 1:00:30It didn't come on the train till after Miss Froy disappeared.
1:00:30 > 1:00:33Oh, yes. That's why it's idiotic. Come on, let's find the doctor.
1:00:33 > 1:00:37- No, wait a minute. - What is it?
1:00:37 > 1:00:40- Did you notice anything wrong about that nun?- No.
1:00:40 > 1:00:43I don't think she's a nun at all. They don't wear high heels.
1:00:56 > 1:01:00Yes, you're right. Did you see Madame Kummer get on the train?
1:01:00 > 1:01:02- No.- Well...
1:01:02 > 1:01:06..supposing they decoyed Miss Froy into the luggage van and hid her,
1:01:06 > 1:01:10the first stop, a patient comes aboard, head injury, all wrapped up,
1:01:10 > 1:01:13the patient is Madame Kummer, she becomes Miss Froy,
1:01:13 > 1:01:15Miss Froy becomes that.
1:01:15 > 1:01:19Yes, but why go to all this trouble to kidnap a harmless governess?
1:01:19 > 1:01:24Maybe it isn't a governess at all. Perhaps it's some political thing.
1:01:24 > 1:01:26Let's investigate.
1:01:28 > 1:01:31HE SPEAKS FRENCH
1:01:31 > 1:01:33HE SPEAKS GERMAN
1:01:33 > 1:01:35You'll just have to put up with it in English.
1:01:35 > 1:01:37Can we look at your patient, please?
1:01:37 > 1:01:39Thank you. Keep an eye on the nun.
1:01:44 > 1:01:46- MAN:- What are you doing here?
1:01:48 > 1:01:50Why are you in here?
1:01:50 > 1:01:52This is a most serious accident case.
1:01:52 > 1:01:55You have no business to be here - neither of you do.
1:01:55 > 1:01:57Dr Hartz, we want you to undo those bandages
1:01:57 > 1:01:58and to look at your patient's face.
1:01:58 > 1:02:01Are you out of your senses? There is no face there.
1:02:01 > 1:02:03Nothing but lumps of raw flesh.
1:02:03 > 1:02:07He has lost so much blood, only a transfusion can save him.
1:02:07 > 1:02:10- Do you want me to murder my patient? - You're sure this is your patient?
1:02:10 > 1:02:15- We believe it's Miss Froy. - Miss Froy!
1:02:15 > 1:02:18You can't be serious! Whatever put such ideas into your heads?
1:02:23 > 1:02:26- I understand she's deaf and dumb. - But she may lip-read.
1:02:26 > 1:02:28Oh, well, that's possible.
1:02:28 > 1:02:31In that case, perhaps you'll join me in the dining car.
1:02:31 > 1:02:33I'll be with you in a moment -
1:02:33 > 1:02:35I want to be certain my patient hasn't been disturbed.
1:02:38 > 1:02:41HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
1:02:41 > 1:02:44How do I know how they cottoned on? Somebody must have tipped them off.
1:02:47 > 1:02:50You never said the old girl was English.
1:02:50 > 1:02:52What difference does that make?
1:02:52 > 1:02:55In a few moments, I shall order three drinks in the dining car.
1:02:55 > 1:02:57Mine will be chartreuse.
1:02:57 > 1:03:01One of the stewards is working for us. Now, listen carefully...
1:03:07 > 1:03:08There's that girl again.
1:03:10 > 1:03:13Seems to have recovered. Lucky it blew over.
1:03:22 > 1:03:24Now, tell me what this is all about.
1:03:24 > 1:03:27Have you ever actually seen your patient?
1:03:27 > 1:03:30- No.- I just had a message to operate at Morshkan.
1:03:30 > 1:03:31How do you know it's NOT Miss Froy?
1:03:31 > 1:03:33We believe there's been a substitution.
1:03:33 > 1:03:35You really think that someone else...?
1:03:35 > 1:03:37HE HUMS
1:03:37 > 1:03:39Oh, er, I want a green chartreuse.
1:03:39 > 1:03:42- Won't you join me? - Thanks. A large brandy.
1:03:42 > 1:03:43- And you?- I don't want anything.
1:03:43 > 1:03:46- Come on, it'll do you good. - No, really, I don't want anything.
1:03:46 > 1:03:48You're very tired. It'll pick you up.
1:03:49 > 1:03:51All right, then, just a small one.
1:03:51 > 1:03:53Two brandies and a chartreuse.
1:03:56 > 1:03:59Do you know anything about the nun who's looking after your patient?
1:03:59 > 1:04:01Nun! No, only that she's from a convent
1:04:01 > 1:04:03close to where the accident occurred.
1:04:03 > 1:04:06Don't you think it's peculiar that she's wearing high-heeled shoes?
1:04:06 > 1:04:11Oh, is she? That IS rather curious, isn't it?
1:04:11 > 1:04:13It's a conspiracy.
1:04:13 > 1:04:16All these people on the train say they haven't seen Miss Froy,
1:04:16 > 1:04:18but they have. We know that because just now in the luggage van...
1:04:18 > 1:04:20She's off again.
1:04:20 > 1:04:23Hope she doesn't create another scene.
1:04:23 > 1:04:25Put the lid on our getting back in time if she did.
1:04:25 > 1:04:29And then this fellow, Doppo, came and grabbed the glasses.
1:04:29 > 1:04:31Yeah, we went for him and had a bit of a fight.
1:04:31 > 1:04:33- Oh, a fight?- We knocked him out.
1:04:33 > 1:04:35Oh!
1:04:39 > 1:04:40He seems to have made a speedy recovery.
1:04:40 > 1:04:42Yes. All that's just bluff.
1:04:45 > 1:04:47- Here.- Grazie.
1:04:51 > 1:04:54How could he be involved in a conspiracy?
1:04:54 > 1:04:57Look at the poor fellow - he's just a harmless traveller.
1:04:57 > 1:05:00- He's also a music-hall artist on tour.- Well?
1:05:00 > 1:05:02The baroness's husband is Minister of Propaganda.
1:05:02 > 1:05:04One word from her, and his tour would be cancelled.
1:05:04 > 1:05:07- Oh, I see. - And if the stewards don't behave,
1:05:07 > 1:05:10they have a cosy brick wall to run up against.
1:05:10 > 1:05:16But tell me about the two English travellers, they denied seeing her.
1:05:16 > 1:05:19Just British diplomacy - "Never climb a fence if you can sit on it."
1:05:19 > 1:05:21An old Foreign Office proverb.
1:05:21 > 1:05:24I can't understand why anyone would want to dispose of the old lady.
1:05:24 > 1:05:29That's what stumps us, but she was on this train and now she's...
1:05:31 > 1:05:32..gone.
1:05:34 > 1:05:38Well, if you're right, it means the whole train is against us.
1:05:38 > 1:05:40What are we going to do?
1:05:40 > 1:05:42Well, in view of what you just told me,
1:05:42 > 1:05:45I shall risk examining the patient.
1:05:45 > 1:05:47- Come on, then!- However, one moment.
1:05:47 > 1:05:51We mustn't act suspicious. Behave as is if nothing had happened.
1:05:53 > 1:05:55Drink. That'll steady your nerves.
1:06:01 > 1:06:03To our health.
1:06:03 > 1:06:06And may our enemies, if they exist, be unconscious of our purpose.
1:06:11 > 1:06:13Let's go. We must hurry now.
1:06:13 > 1:06:15Come on, drink up.
1:06:30 > 1:06:32Wait in here.
1:06:32 > 1:06:33Go on.
1:06:38 > 1:06:41- Anything wrong?- Nothing.
1:06:41 > 1:06:43Except they noticed you were wearing high heels.
1:06:45 > 1:06:48However, it makes no difference.
1:06:48 > 1:06:50We shall reach Morshkan in three minutes.
1:06:51 > 1:06:53Quite an eventful journey.
1:06:57 > 1:06:58Well?
1:06:58 > 1:07:00Yes, the patient is Miss Froy.
1:07:01 > 1:07:05She will be taken off the train at Morshkan in about three minutes.
1:07:05 > 1:07:08She will be removed to the hospital there, and operated on.
1:07:08 > 1:07:11Unfortunately, the operation will not be successful.
1:07:11 > 1:07:13Oh, I should perhaps have explained.
1:07:14 > 1:07:17The operation will be performed...
1:07:17 > 1:07:18..by me.
1:07:26 > 1:07:29You see, I am in this conspiracy, as you term it.
1:07:33 > 1:07:37You are a very alert young couple, but it's quite useless to think,
1:07:37 > 1:07:40as you are undoubtedly doing, of a way out of your dilemma.
1:07:40 > 1:07:43The drinks you had, I regret to say, contained a quantity of hydrocin.
1:07:45 > 1:07:48For your benefit, hydrocin is a little-known drug which has
1:07:48 > 1:07:51the effect, in a small quantity, of paralysing the brain
1:07:51 > 1:07:54and rendering the victim unconscious for considerable period.
1:07:54 > 1:07:58In a slightly larger quantity, of course, it induces madness.
1:08:00 > 1:08:03However, you have my word the dose was a normal one.
1:08:09 > 1:08:11In a few moments, you will join your young friend.
1:08:13 > 1:08:16Need I say how sorry I am having to take such a -
1:08:16 > 1:08:19how shall I say? - melodramatic course.
1:08:21 > 1:08:23But your persistent meddling made it necessary.
1:08:38 > 1:08:41- Are you all right? You fainted. - Did I?
1:08:41 > 1:08:44Listen! There is a woman next door going to be murdered,
1:08:44 > 1:08:47and we've got to get moving before this stuff takes effect.
1:08:47 > 1:08:49I read that if you keep on the go, you can stay awake.
1:08:49 > 1:08:51Right. Come on, let's get going.
1:08:53 > 1:08:54It's locked.
1:08:57 > 1:09:00We can't go that way, we'll be spotted.
1:09:00 > 1:09:02- You can't do that! - Don't worry, it's only next door.
1:09:02 > 1:09:05You stand on your head, touch your toes, anything,
1:09:05 > 1:09:07only, whatever you do, don't fall asleep.
1:09:18 > 1:09:21WHISTLE BLASTS
1:09:47 > 1:09:50Go on, you needn't be afraid. It is Miss Froy.
1:09:52 > 1:09:55It's all right, you haven't been drugged.
1:09:55 > 1:09:57He told me to put something in your drink, but I didn't.
1:09:57 > 1:09:59Who the devil are you? He said you are deaf and dumb.
1:09:59 > 1:10:03Never mind about that. If you want to save her, you've got to hurry.
1:10:17 > 1:10:19Hartz will be back in a minute. What will happen then?
1:10:19 > 1:10:21If we can hold him off till we get past Morshkan,
1:10:21 > 1:10:23the frontier's a few miles beyond the station.
1:10:25 > 1:10:27SHE CHOKES, GASPS
1:10:29 > 1:10:31Come on, there's still time.
1:10:33 > 1:10:39THEY SPEAK ITALIAN
1:10:49 > 1:10:51That's Morshkan. Have you finished?
1:10:55 > 1:10:57Come on, Miss Froy.
1:10:57 > 1:11:01Cut it out, you're not drugged. I'll explain later. Abracadabra.
1:11:01 > 1:11:04Miss Froy! Oh, I can't believe it!
1:11:04 > 1:11:07- Thank you, my dear. Thank you very much.- Careful!
1:11:17 > 1:11:19- Ready?- Yes.
1:11:45 > 1:11:47HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
1:11:50 > 1:11:51Are you all right, Miss Froy?
1:11:51 > 1:11:55Yes, thank you. It's rather like the rush hour on the underground.
1:11:59 > 1:12:01Careful, it's slowing down.
1:12:17 > 1:12:19Drat!
1:12:44 > 1:12:47I'm sorry you've had such an uncomfortable journey, Miss Froy.
1:13:11 > 1:13:12Get back on the train.
1:13:34 > 1:13:35I hope nothing goes wrong.
1:13:37 > 1:13:38Aren't we stopping rather a long time?
1:13:40 > 1:13:42The ambulance is going. We'll be off in a jiffy.
1:13:50 > 1:13:53WHISTLE BLASTS
1:13:58 > 1:14:01In a few minutes, we'll be over the border.
1:14:01 > 1:14:05SHE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
1:14:05 > 1:14:08I know I've been well paid, and I've done plenty of dirty work for it,
1:14:08 > 1:14:10but this was murder, and she was an English woman.
1:14:10 > 1:14:13- You are Bandrikan? - My husband was, but I'm English.
1:14:13 > 1:14:15You were going to butcher her in cold blood.
1:14:15 > 1:14:18Your little diversion made it necessary not only to remove
1:14:18 > 1:14:22the lady in question, but two others as well.
1:14:22 > 1:14:25- You can't do that. - Also, it would be unwise of us
1:14:25 > 1:14:29to permit the existence of anyone who cannot be trusted.
1:14:29 > 1:14:33- You wouldn't dare. I know too much. - Precisely.
1:14:38 > 1:14:40I think we're over the border now.
1:14:41 > 1:14:45- You can come out, Miss Froy. - Oh, bless me.
1:14:45 > 1:14:46What an unpleasant journey.
1:14:46 > 1:14:49Never mind. You shall have a corner seat for the rest of the way.
1:14:49 > 1:14:52There you are. Now it's over,
1:14:52 > 1:14:54I think you should tell us what it's all about.
1:14:54 > 1:14:55WOMAN SCREAMS
1:14:55 > 1:14:57What was that scream?
1:14:57 > 1:14:59- Surely it was only the train. - It wasn't. It was a woman.
1:14:59 > 1:15:00Be careful!
1:15:10 > 1:15:12They've rumbled. We're on a branch line.
1:15:12 > 1:15:14- They've slipped the rear part of the train.- Oh, dear, dear.
1:15:14 > 1:15:17Who are you, and why do they want to get hold of you?
1:15:17 > 1:15:19I haven't the faintest idea. I'm a children's governess.
1:15:19 > 1:15:22I can only think that they've made a terrible mistake.
1:15:22 > 1:15:24Why are you holding out on us? Tell us the truth.
1:15:24 > 1:15:26You've got us involved in this fantastic plot,
1:15:26 > 1:15:29- you might at least trust us. - I really don't kn... I...
1:15:30 > 1:15:33- I wonder if there's anyone else left on the train.- There's only the
1:15:33 > 1:15:35dining car in front, but there won't be anybody there now.
1:15:35 > 1:15:39What do you make it? Tea-time. Well, all the English will be there.
1:15:40 > 1:15:42Come on, we'd better stick together.
1:15:50 > 1:15:52There's the old girl turned up.
1:15:54 > 1:15:56Told you it was a lot of fuss about nothing.
1:15:56 > 1:15:57Bolt must have jammed.
1:15:59 > 1:16:01I've got something to say. Will you all please listen?
1:16:01 > 1:16:04An attempt was made to abduct this lady by force,
1:16:04 > 1:16:06and I believe the people who did it will try again.
1:16:06 > 1:16:08What's he drivelling about?
1:16:08 > 1:16:11Look out the window. This train's been diverted on to a branch line.
1:16:11 > 1:16:14What are you talking about? Abductions, diverted trains.
1:16:14 > 1:16:15We're telling you the truth!
1:16:15 > 1:16:19I'm not interested. You've annoyed us enough with your story.
1:16:19 > 1:16:22You must have got the wrong end of the stick.
1:16:22 > 1:16:25- Things like that just don't happen. - We're not in England now.
1:16:25 > 1:16:27I don't see what difference that makes.
1:16:27 > 1:16:28We're stopping.
1:16:31 > 1:16:34See those cars? They're here to take Miss Froy away.
1:16:34 > 1:16:36Nonsense.
1:16:36 > 1:16:38Look, there go a couple of people.
1:16:40 > 1:16:42The car's come to pick them up.
1:16:42 > 1:16:44Then why the trouble of uncoupling the train and diverting it?
1:16:44 > 1:16:47- Uncoupling?- There's nothing left of the train beyond the sleeping car.
1:16:47 > 1:16:49There must be. Our bags are in the first-class carriage.
1:16:49 > 1:16:51Not any longer. Would you like to come and look?
1:16:51 > 1:16:56If this is a practical joke, I shan't think it very funny.
1:16:56 > 1:16:58Good Lord!
1:17:05 > 1:17:07Get some brandy.
1:17:07 > 1:17:09You don't suppose there's something in his story, do you?
1:17:09 > 1:17:13- Seems a bit queer.- After all, people don't tie up nuns.
1:17:17 > 1:17:18Thank you.
1:17:19 > 1:17:20Someone's coming!
1:17:26 > 1:17:28They can't do anything to us. We're British subjects.
1:17:41 > 1:17:44I have come to offer the most sincere apologies.
1:17:44 > 1:17:47An extremely serious incident has occurred -
1:17:47 > 1:17:50an attempt was made to interfere with passengers on this train.
1:17:50 > 1:17:56The authorities were notified, so if you'll accompany me to Morshkan,
1:17:56 > 1:18:01I will inform the British Embassy. The cars are at your disposal.
1:18:03 > 1:18:06We're grateful. Lucky some of you fellows understand English.
1:18:06 > 1:18:09- Well, I was at Oxford. - So was I. What year?
1:18:09 > 1:18:11This woman's trying to say something.
1:18:11 > 1:18:14I don't understand the language. Would you...?
1:18:18 > 1:18:19That's fixed him.
1:18:21 > 1:18:24- What the blazes did you do that for? - I was at Cambridge.
1:18:24 > 1:18:27What's that got to do with it? You heard what he said, didn't you?
1:18:27 > 1:18:29I heard what SHE said. It's a trick to get us off the train.
1:18:29 > 1:18:32I don't believe it. The man's explanation was quite satisfactory.
1:18:32 > 1:18:33A thing like this might cause a war.
1:18:33 > 1:18:37HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
1:18:37 > 1:18:39I'm going outside. Tell him what's occurred.
1:18:39 > 1:18:42It's up to us to apologise and put the matter right.
1:19:03 > 1:19:06- You were right. Do you mind, old man?- Certainly.
1:19:09 > 1:19:11- Look as if they mean business. - I'm afraid so.
1:19:11 > 1:19:13They can't do anything, it'd mean an international situation.
1:19:13 > 1:19:15It's happened before.
1:19:15 > 1:19:17They're coming.
1:19:17 > 1:19:19Don't let them in! They'll murder us.
1:19:19 > 1:19:21They dare not let us go now.
1:19:31 > 1:19:33I order you to surrender at once.
1:19:33 > 1:19:36Nothing doing. Come any nearer, I'll fire.
1:19:36 > 1:19:37I've warned you.
1:19:40 > 1:19:42Better take cover. It'll start any minute now.
1:19:46 > 1:19:48Nasty jam, this. Don't like the look of it.
1:19:48 > 1:19:51- Got plenty of ammunition? - A whole pouch.- Good.
1:19:51 > 1:19:54- Duck down.- I'm not going to fight. It's madness.
1:19:54 > 1:19:56It'll be safer to protest down here.
1:20:01 > 1:20:03Hello, they're trying to work round to the other side.
1:20:03 > 1:20:04You're behaving like a pack of fools.
1:20:04 > 1:20:07What chance have we got against a lot of armed men?
1:20:07 > 1:20:09You heard what the mother superior said -
1:20:09 > 1:20:10if we surrender now, we're in for it.
1:20:28 > 1:20:30Never get to the match now.
1:20:30 > 1:20:33- Give it to me. Give it to me!- No!
1:20:35 > 1:20:38- What's going on? - He's got a gun and he won't use it.
1:20:38 > 1:20:41- What's the idea? - I won't be a party to this.
1:20:41 > 1:20:42I don't believe in fighting.
1:20:42 > 1:20:45Pacifist, eh? Won't work, old boy. Early Christians tried it
1:20:45 > 1:20:47and got thrown to the lions. Hand it over.
1:20:50 > 1:20:52I'm not afraid to use it.
1:20:52 > 1:20:54I'm probably more used to it.
1:20:54 > 1:20:57I once won a box of cigars.
1:20:57 > 1:20:59He's talking rot, he's a damn good shot.
1:21:00 > 1:21:04You know, I'm half-inclined to believe...
1:21:04 > 1:21:07..that there's some rational explanation to all this.
1:21:07 > 1:21:09Rotten! Only knocked his hat off.
1:21:10 > 1:21:13Would you mind if I talked to you for a minute?
1:21:13 > 1:21:18- What, now?- Yes, please forgive me, but it's very important.
1:21:18 > 1:21:21- Hang on to this, will you? - All right.
1:21:22 > 1:21:24I think it's safer along here. You come, too.
1:21:24 > 1:21:26GUNFIRE CONTINUES
1:21:32 > 1:21:36I just wanted to tell you that I must be getting along now.
1:21:36 > 1:21:39- You can't! You'll be shot down. - I must take that risk.
1:21:39 > 1:21:43Listen carefully - in case I'm unlucky and you get through,
1:21:43 > 1:21:47I want you to take back a message to Mr Callender at the Foreign Office.
1:21:47 > 1:21:50- You ARE a spy. - That's such a grim word.
1:21:50 > 1:21:53- What is the message?- It's a tune.
1:21:53 > 1:21:55- A tune?- It contains, in code,
1:21:55 > 1:21:58the vital clause of a secret pact between two European countries.
1:21:58 > 1:22:02- I want you to memorise it.- Go ahead. - The first part goes like this.
1:22:02 > 1:22:04# Da-da-da da, da-da de. #
1:22:04 > 1:22:05GUNSHOT
1:22:05 > 1:22:07Oh! Perhaps I'd better write it down. Got any paper?
1:22:07 > 1:22:10Don't bother, I was brought up on music. I can memorise anything.
1:22:10 > 1:22:13Very well. # Da-da-da da, da-da de... #
1:22:13 > 1:22:16- The old girl's off her rocker. - I don't wonder.
1:22:16 > 1:22:19Why don't you face it? They'll kill the lot of us.
1:22:19 > 1:22:21For goodness' sake, shut up.
1:22:21 > 1:22:23- # Da-da dum-dum-de. # - That's right.
1:22:23 > 1:22:26Now we have two chances instead of one. You sure you'll remember it?
1:22:26 > 1:22:28Don't worry, I won't stop whistling it.
1:22:28 > 1:22:30- This is my best way out. - Yes, just about.
1:22:31 > 1:22:34Even if you do get away, they'll stop you at the frontier.
1:22:34 > 1:22:37- We can't let her go like this.- It's a hell of a risk you are taking...
1:22:37 > 1:22:40In this job, one must take risks.
1:22:40 > 1:22:43I'm very grateful to you both for all you've done.
1:22:43 > 1:22:45I hope and pray no harm comes to you
1:22:45 > 1:22:48and that we shall meet again one day.
1:22:48 > 1:22:50I hope so too. Good luck.
1:22:50 > 1:22:52Good luck.
1:22:53 > 1:22:54Will you help me out?
1:22:57 > 1:23:00Now, you take the weight on top.
1:23:00 > 1:23:01Right you are.
1:23:06 > 1:23:07Goodbye.
1:23:11 > 1:23:12GUNFIRE
1:23:20 > 1:23:22- Was she hit?- I'm not sure.
1:23:28 > 1:23:30Well, that's the end of my 12.
1:23:30 > 1:23:32Not much left here either.
1:23:34 > 1:23:37We've only got one chance - got to get this train going.
1:23:37 > 1:23:39Try and get back to the main line and cross the frontier.
1:23:39 > 1:23:42Those driver fellows won't do what you tell them.
1:23:44 > 1:23:46We'll bluff them. Who's coming?
1:23:46 > 1:23:47- Count on me.- Me, too.
1:23:47 > 1:23:51We can't all go. You carry on here. If we have any luck,
1:23:51 > 1:23:54- we'll stop at the points then you can switch them over.- OK.
1:23:54 > 1:23:57You idiots. You're just inviting death.
1:24:02 > 1:24:04I've had enough.
1:24:04 > 1:24:06Just because I've the sense to try and avoid being murdered,
1:24:06 > 1:24:09I'm accused of being a pacifist. All right.
1:24:09 > 1:24:11I'd rather be called a rat than die like one.
1:24:11 > 1:24:14Think for a moment - If we give ourselves up,
1:24:14 > 1:24:16they're bound to give us a trial.
1:24:16 > 1:24:18Stop it. Nobody's listening to you.
1:24:18 > 1:24:22Very well, you go your way, I'll go mine.
1:24:22 > 1:24:25- Where are you off to? - To do the only sensible thing.
1:24:25 > 1:24:27Oh, let the fellow go if he wants to.
1:24:37 > 1:24:38I don't understand...
1:24:56 > 1:24:58Oh, please!
1:24:58 > 1:25:01Why aren't we going? Why aren't we going?!
1:25:01 > 1:25:03They said we were going. Why aren't we?
1:25:03 > 1:25:05If only he can get us away now, he must!
1:25:05 > 1:25:07Only one left. I'll keep that for a sitter.
1:25:09 > 1:25:12They're moving away from the car and coming towards us.
1:25:13 > 1:25:15Pity we haven't a few more rounds.
1:25:15 > 1:25:19It's funny, I told my husband when I left him
1:25:19 > 1:25:21that I wouldn't see him again.
1:25:21 > 1:25:23Gilbert. Gilbert!
1:25:30 > 1:25:32ENGINE STARTS
1:25:32 > 1:25:35- Egads, we're off! - Gilbert came through!
1:25:42 > 1:25:43Go on, keep going.
1:25:55 > 1:25:59- Do you know how to control this thing?- I watched him start it.
1:25:59 > 1:26:02I know a bit about it. Once drove a miniature engine.
1:26:02 > 1:26:04Good. I'll look out for the points.
1:26:10 > 1:26:12The blighters are chasing us, look.
1:26:15 > 1:26:17We can't have far to go.
1:26:23 > 1:26:26Time for my little job - changing the points.
1:26:26 > 1:26:28Thank heavens we shall be in neutral territory.
1:26:28 > 1:26:29That will not be necessary.
1:26:32 > 1:26:36I am sorry but the points, as you call them, will not be changed over.
1:26:36 > 1:26:38Will you please be seated?
1:26:46 > 1:26:49There they are, just ahead of us. Do you think you can stop it?
1:26:49 > 1:26:50Hope so.
1:26:53 > 1:26:58Keep still until my friends arrive. If you move, I will have to shoot.
1:26:58 > 1:27:00There's one thing you don't know.
1:27:00 > 1:27:02There's only one bullet left, and if you shoot me,
1:27:02 > 1:27:05the others will have a chance.
1:27:05 > 1:27:07You're in rather a difficult position, aren't you?
1:27:08 > 1:27:10Sit down, please.
1:27:11 > 1:27:12All right.
1:27:17 > 1:27:18Where the devil's Charters?
1:27:30 > 1:27:32Go ahead, she's done it.
1:27:32 > 1:27:34GUNFIRE
1:27:42 > 1:27:43Oh!
1:27:43 > 1:27:45It's all right, it's just my leg.
1:27:59 > 1:28:00SHE SPEAKS ITALIAN
1:28:02 > 1:28:04HE SPEAKS ITALIAN
1:28:04 > 1:28:07Or as they say in English, "Jolly good luck to them."
1:28:07 > 1:28:10I'm glad all that's over, aren't you?
1:28:10 > 1:28:13Heaven knows what the government will say about this.
1:28:13 > 1:28:16- Nothing at all, they'll hush it up. - What?
1:28:16 > 1:28:17TRAIN WHISTLE BLASTS
1:28:17 > 1:28:20Hey, take your hand off that thing, I've got to remember a tune.
1:28:20 > 1:28:23- Remember...? - HE WHISTLES
1:28:38 > 1:28:41- Porter, sir?- No, thanks.
1:28:41 > 1:28:43Well, we're home, Gilbert. HE WHISTLES
1:28:43 > 1:28:46Can't you stop humming that awful tune? You must know it backwards.
1:28:46 > 1:28:48I'm not taking any risks.
1:28:49 > 1:28:52- Charles be here to meet you? - I expect so.
1:28:54 > 1:28:56You'll be busy between now and Thursday.
1:28:56 > 1:28:59I could meet you for lunch or dinner. Would you like that?
1:28:59 > 1:29:01Sorry, I didn't mean that...
1:29:01 > 1:29:04No, as a matter of fact, I've got to deliver this theme song
1:29:04 > 1:29:06for Miss Froy, then I'm off to Yorkshire to finish my book.
1:29:06 > 1:29:08HE HUMS
1:29:09 > 1:29:11- Ready?- Yes.
1:29:21 > 1:29:25- Ample time to catch the 6.50 to Manchester after all.- Yes.
1:29:33 > 1:29:37HE HUMS
1:29:37 > 1:29:39- Any sign of Charles yet? - No, I can't see him.
1:29:41 > 1:29:43Well, this is where we say goodbye.
1:29:49 > 1:29:50What's the matter?
1:29:57 > 1:29:59- Charles?- Yes!
1:29:59 > 1:30:02You heartless, callous, selfish, swollen-headed beast...!
1:30:07 > 1:30:09- Are you going anywhere? - Foreign Office.
1:30:13 > 1:30:15THEY CHUCKLE
1:30:15 > 1:30:17Where are we going for our honeymoon?
1:30:17 > 1:30:20I don't know, somewhere quiet. Somewhere where there are no trains.
1:30:20 > 1:30:22Mr Callender will see you now.
1:30:26 > 1:30:28Wait a minute!
1:30:28 > 1:30:29- It's gone.- What's gone?
1:30:29 > 1:30:31- The tune. I've forgotten it.- Oh, no!
1:30:31 > 1:30:33Wait a minute, let me concentrate.
1:30:33 > 1:30:35HE HUMS WRONG TUNE
1:30:35 > 1:30:37No, no, that's the Wedding March.
1:30:39 > 1:30:41This is awful! I've done nothing else but sing it since the
1:30:41 > 1:30:44day before yesterday, and now I've forgotten it completely.
1:30:44 > 1:30:46PIANO PLAYS THE TUNE
1:31:06 > 1:31:08- Miss Froy!- Well, I'll be had!