A Good Woman

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0:00:01 > 0:00:03When I was going through my wardrobe

0:00:03 > 0:00:06I found an extra hairpin on the floor.

0:00:06 > 0:00:09That's nothing. I found her hair in my bed!

0:00:13 > 0:00:19# Just another tragedy of a down and out, I guess

0:00:20 > 0:00:24# For I'm selling the thing that means everything

0:00:24 > 0:00:29# To my life and my happiness...#

0:00:33 > 0:00:36'Some women bring happiness wherever they go.

0:00:36 > 0:00:39'Others, whenever they go.

0:00:39 > 0:00:41'I do both.

0:00:41 > 0:00:44'Husbands like to see me come.

0:00:44 > 0:00:46'Wives prefer to see me go.'

0:00:46 > 0:00:48There she is! That's her.

0:00:48 > 0:00:50Whose husband didn't she sleep with?

0:00:50 > 0:00:51Who's she with now?

0:00:51 > 0:00:52Who knows?

0:00:52 > 0:00:53She's older than I thought.

0:00:53 > 0:00:55Shh! Look, look! Watch.

0:00:57 > 0:00:58This'll teach her.

0:00:58 > 0:01:02I'm sorry, Mrs Erlynne, but that account was closed -

0:01:02 > 0:01:04by Mrs Fairchild.

0:01:06 > 0:01:09I wish you'd told me before I ordered the Bordeaux.

0:01:11 > 0:01:12What Bordeaux, Mrs Erlynne?

0:01:12 > 0:01:15Joe, you're my kind of guy.

0:01:17 > 0:01:18Is she behind me?

0:01:18 > 0:01:20In the blue.

0:01:20 > 0:01:22Charge it to Senator Kleghorn.

0:01:22 > 0:01:25That's Mrs Kleghorn sitting next to Mrs Fairchild.

0:01:25 > 0:01:26What a small world.

0:01:26 > 0:01:27And Mrs Winters on her right.

0:01:27 > 0:01:31Oh. And getting smaller.

0:01:31 > 0:01:33You wanna go out the back?

0:01:33 > 0:01:35No, no. If you go out the back...

0:01:35 > 0:01:36You'll never come in the front, Joe.

0:01:38 > 0:01:40A lady always leaves the way she came.

0:01:45 > 0:01:48Just look at her. I thought my husband had more taste.

0:01:48 > 0:01:51So sorry to hear you're leaving us, Mrs Erlynne.

0:01:51 > 0:01:53I'm leaving you?

0:01:53 > 0:01:55I'll prepare your bill.

0:01:57 > 0:02:01# I ask you to make me an offer

0:02:01 > 0:02:05# I don't know how much it will be

0:02:05 > 0:02:10# It isn't a lot, but it's all I've got

0:02:10 > 0:02:14# Who'll buy an old gold ring?

0:02:14 > 0:02:18# It's known me as poor as a beggar

0:02:18 > 0:02:22# And it's known me as rich as a king

0:02:22 > 0:02:27# And it's known me in hell and in heaven as well

0:02:27 > 0:02:32# Who'll buy an old gold ring?... #

0:02:40 > 0:02:42'My sudden change in circumstance

0:02:42 > 0:02:45'was not the only reason for my departure.

0:02:45 > 0:02:49'The Italian coast in summer attracts the rich and famous.

0:02:49 > 0:02:51'I'm infamous and poor.

0:02:51 > 0:02:53'Close enough.

0:02:54 > 0:02:57'One door closes, another opens.

0:02:57 > 0:03:01'Sometimes that door is not the one you expect.

0:03:03 > 0:03:06'I saw my chance and decided to take it.'

0:04:06 > 0:04:10Meg, dear! Come along, come along.

0:04:10 > 0:04:11Ah, Giuseppina.

0:04:11 > 0:04:15THEY CONVERSE IN ITALIAN

0:04:15 > 0:04:17It's the best glove shop in the city.

0:04:17 > 0:04:19She'll give you a good discount.

0:04:19 > 0:04:20But-but, Robert...

0:04:20 > 0:04:21Yes, no, now you go along.

0:04:21 > 0:04:23I'll find your husband. Don't worry. Go along.

0:04:27 > 0:04:29This way, Madame.

0:04:37 > 0:04:38These are pretty.

0:04:50 > 0:04:52Your hand looks about right.

0:04:52 > 0:04:53I beg your pardon?

0:04:53 > 0:04:54My little sister.

0:04:54 > 0:04:56She was adamant about details but neglected to tell me the size.

0:04:56 > 0:04:58Would you mind?

0:04:58 > 0:05:00Oh, no, of course not.

0:05:00 > 0:05:03It's always a little snug the first time.

0:05:03 > 0:05:05Maybe you should take off your ring?

0:05:05 > 0:05:07It's my wedding ring. I never take it off.

0:05:07 > 0:05:08The other hand, then.

0:05:12 > 0:05:15Ahem.

0:05:17 > 0:05:19No need to button it. You can see it fits perfectly.

0:05:19 > 0:05:22< Lord Darlington, you depraved man!

0:05:22 > 0:05:23What have you been up to?

0:05:23 > 0:05:27Ignore him, Meg, dear. He's a great sinner

0:05:27 > 0:05:29but an excellent bridge partner

0:05:29 > 0:05:31or I would never tolerate him.

0:05:31 > 0:05:33Do you know each other?

0:05:33 > 0:05:34The year I spent in London.

0:05:34 > 0:05:35Margaret, I told you about John.

0:05:35 > 0:05:36You've, uh-you've met?

0:05:36 > 0:05:39No, not really. It's nice to meet you.

0:05:39 > 0:05:40It's a pleasure, Mrs Windemere.

0:05:40 > 0:05:42Your wife was helping me select gloves for my mother.

0:05:42 > 0:05:44Your sister, you said.

0:05:44 > 0:05:45Either one.

0:05:46 > 0:05:48We should have dinner. Where are you staying?

0:05:48 > 0:05:50The grand, but we're trying to find a villa.

0:05:50 > 0:05:53So late in the season? I warned you...

0:05:53 > 0:05:55I know one that's come available.

0:06:15 > 0:06:18Isn't it an election year in the Wild West?

0:06:18 > 0:06:19Who says I'm running?

0:06:19 > 0:06:21It's perfect! It's beautiful!

0:06:21 > 0:06:23Did I mention the ghosts?

0:06:23 > 0:06:25It's everything I imagined.

0:06:25 > 0:06:26I feel like a princess in a fairy tale.

0:06:26 > 0:06:28You are a princess.

0:06:28 > 0:06:30That's cos I married the prince.

0:06:30 > 0:06:32I have her completely fooled, poor girl.

0:06:32 > 0:06:35If I could fool a woman as pretty as your wife

0:06:35 > 0:06:36I wouldn't be a bachelor.

0:06:36 > 0:06:38Now you've made her blush.

0:06:38 > 0:06:41Don't be silly. Come and see the paintings.

0:07:05 > 0:07:06Come on.

0:07:21 > 0:07:23Lady Plymdale?

0:07:23 > 0:07:25Oh, is she the one with the big...

0:07:25 > 0:07:28Feet. Enormous feet.

0:07:28 > 0:07:30Poor old Plymdale.

0:07:30 > 0:07:32- Ace, queen, king, jack. - No honours.

0:07:32 > 0:07:34No, no, no. John's yacht, John's rules.

0:07:34 > 0:07:36Have it. Thank you.

0:07:36 > 0:07:38Huge feet. Pontoons.

0:07:38 > 0:07:41If desire had an antidote, it would be those pontoons of hers.

0:07:41 > 0:07:43I grow ill thinking of them.

0:07:43 > 0:07:45How many times have you been divorced, Tuppy?

0:07:45 > 0:07:48Three, four? I've simply lost count.

0:07:48 > 0:07:50- That's bigamy. - Bigamy's having one wife too many.

0:07:50 > 0:07:52So's monogamy!

0:07:52 > 0:07:54One should always have a proper basis for marriage.

0:07:54 > 0:07:55A mutual...

0:07:55 > 0:07:57- ..misunderstanding? - Exactly.

0:07:57 > 0:07:59A man can't be happy with one woman.

0:07:59 > 0:08:02A man can be happy with any woman a long as he doesn't love her.

0:08:02 > 0:08:03For a man who's never thought of getting married,

0:08:03 > 0:08:05you seem to know an awful lot about it.

0:08:05 > 0:08:07I thought very seriously of marrying.

0:08:07 > 0:08:08That's why I'm still single.

0:08:08 > 0:08:09Hear, hear!

0:08:09 > 0:08:11I just haven't met the right woman, that's all.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13Look at Cecil, still with Edna.

0:08:13 > 0:08:16One keeps one's eyes wide open before the wedding

0:08:16 > 0:08:19and half-shut after. That's all there is to it.

0:08:19 > 0:08:20Exactly.

0:08:22 > 0:08:23John?

0:08:28 > 0:08:30I fancy raising the stakes.

0:08:30 > 0:08:33Oh! Lucky blighter!

0:08:42 > 0:08:45You don't look as if you're enjoying yourself.

0:08:45 > 0:08:47Oh, I am. It's a very nice party.

0:08:47 > 0:08:48Can I get you a drink?

0:08:48 > 0:08:50No, thank you, I don't drink.

0:08:50 > 0:08:51You don't drink?

0:08:51 > 0:08:52Do I seem like a prig?

0:08:52 > 0:08:54No, of course not.

0:08:54 > 0:08:55It's the way I was raised.

0:08:55 > 0:08:57In a convent?

0:08:58 > 0:09:02By my aunt Julia, my father's sister.

0:09:02 > 0:09:05My mother died when I was very little.

0:09:07 > 0:09:09It's the only picture I have of her.

0:09:09 > 0:09:12My father never remarried.

0:09:12 > 0:09:16She's every bit as beautiful as her daughter.

0:09:16 > 0:09:18Have I offended you?

0:09:18 > 0:09:20I meant it as a compliment.

0:09:20 > 0:09:22You pay me too many compliments, Lord Darlington.

0:09:22 > 0:09:23I'll stop at once.

0:09:23 > 0:09:25Thank you.

0:09:25 > 0:09:27Just so you know, I meant every one of them.

0:09:28 > 0:09:32You pretend to be bad, but you're not, really.

0:09:32 > 0:09:34There is no good or bad.

0:09:34 > 0:09:35People are either charming or tedious.

0:09:35 > 0:09:37If I've been the latter, I sincerely apologise.

0:09:37 > 0:09:39I'd like us to become friends.

0:09:39 > 0:09:40We already are, aren't we?

0:09:40 > 0:09:42Well, not if you keep flattering mew

0:09:42 > 0:09:44and paying me silly compliments.

0:09:44 > 0:09:46Define silly.

0:09:46 > 0:09:48I want your word.

0:09:48 > 0:09:51I find the best way to keep my word is never to give it.

0:10:00 > 0:10:04MEN CONVERSE IN ITALIAN

0:10:08 > 0:10:12HE SHOUTS IN ITALIAN

0:10:12 > 0:10:15Buongiorno!

0:10:28 > 0:10:30Look, it has to be something really special.

0:10:32 > 0:10:33My wife's birthday?

0:10:33 > 0:10:37HE RESPONDS IN ITALIAN

0:10:52 > 0:10:53What do you think?

0:10:54 > 0:10:56The sapphire matches your eyes.

0:10:58 > 0:11:00It's for my wife.

0:11:00 > 0:11:03A man should never buy his wife jewellery.

0:11:03 > 0:11:04And why is that?

0:11:04 > 0:11:07It makes her wonder what he bought his mistress.

0:11:07 > 0:11:10My wife has nothing to wonder about.

0:11:10 > 0:11:13She's a lucky woman.

0:11:13 > 0:11:17If I were your wife, this is what I'd want.

0:11:17 > 0:11:19A fan?

0:11:19 > 0:11:22Not for stirring the air, for stirring the heart.

0:11:22 > 0:11:24For centuries, an erotic language

0:11:24 > 0:11:27between men and women.

0:11:29 > 0:11:32If a woman placed it on her breast like this,

0:11:32 > 0:11:34it meant, "I love you."

0:11:34 > 0:11:37"When can I see you?"

0:11:37 > 0:11:38"Wait for me."

0:11:40 > 0:11:41"You may kiss me."

0:11:43 > 0:11:46"We're being watched."

0:11:51 > 0:11:52I'm sold.

0:11:59 > 0:12:01Quanto?

0:12:01 > 0:12:04No, non la vendita. Not for sale.

0:12:06 > 0:12:10HE SPEAKS IN ITALIAN

0:12:10 > 0:12:11My mama...

0:12:15 > 0:12:17Real gold.

0:12:18 > 0:12:19If you give him everything

0:12:19 > 0:12:21who's going to buy me an espresso?

0:12:27 > 0:12:29Oh, my back!

0:12:29 > 0:12:31DOGS YAP

0:12:31 > 0:12:34And Americans everywhere.

0:12:34 > 0:12:38You'd never know there was a depression in that country.

0:12:38 > 0:12:41SHE ORDERS IN ITALIAN

0:12:42 > 0:12:44They don't shop. They pillage!

0:12:45 > 0:12:47And they speak loudly.

0:12:47 > 0:12:50Could the entire nation be hard-of-hearing?

0:12:50 > 0:12:51Something in the diet, perhaps?

0:12:51 > 0:12:53But we have American friends, mama.

0:12:53 > 0:12:56Well, they don't need to know what we say about them, dear.

0:12:56 > 0:12:59If everyone knew what everyone said of each other

0:12:59 > 0:13:01there wouldn't be four friends in the world.

0:13:01 > 0:13:03I like America.

0:13:03 > 0:13:05Name me another society that's come from barbarism

0:13:05 > 0:13:08to decadence without bothering to create a civilization in between.

0:13:08 > 0:13:10A tribute to American efficiency.

0:13:10 > 0:13:12There's Mr Windemere.

0:13:12 > 0:13:14Ooh, he must join us, then.

0:13:14 > 0:13:15Hoo-oooh!

0:13:15 > 0:13:17He can't see you, mama.

0:13:17 > 0:13:19Who's that with him?

0:13:19 > 0:13:20Looks like his wife.

0:13:20 > 0:13:23No, I don't think it is.

0:13:24 > 0:13:29I can't see now. They're getting into the car.

0:13:29 > 0:13:31It must be the wife if she's getting into the car.

0:13:31 > 0:13:32It wasn't her.

0:13:32 > 0:13:35Then I must know who it is!

0:13:35 > 0:13:37I think we should mind our own business.

0:13:37 > 0:13:39My own business bores me.

0:13:39 > 0:13:42I much prefer other people's.

0:13:42 > 0:13:45Poor little Meg, she's so sweet.

0:13:45 > 0:13:47And the girl has no mother.

0:13:47 > 0:13:48I want to take her to my breast.

0:13:48 > 0:13:49I had a similar thought.

0:13:50 > 0:13:53I don't suppose Mr Windemere would be pleased to hear it.

0:13:53 > 0:13:55Marital bliss is a great burden

0:13:55 > 0:13:57to place on two people, Tuppy.

0:13:57 > 0:13:59Sometimes a third person is needed to lighten the load.

0:13:59 > 0:14:03It would seem Mr Windemere agrees with you.

0:14:08 > 0:14:10CHURCH BELLS TOLLS

0:14:19 > 0:14:22BELL TOLLS AGAIN

0:14:36 > 0:14:38I can guess what you were doing.

0:14:38 > 0:14:41Shopping for my birthday present?

0:14:47 > 0:14:48I was right.

0:14:48 > 0:14:50What did you get?

0:14:50 > 0:14:53Not a thing. You're too old for presents.

0:14:53 > 0:14:54A hint?

0:14:54 > 0:14:56A tiny speck of a hint?

0:14:56 > 0:14:58You have to wait and see.

0:14:59 > 0:15:00Perfume?

0:15:00 > 0:15:02Stop it!

0:15:02 > 0:15:03A book of poems?

0:15:03 > 0:15:05Um, a dress?

0:15:05 > 0:15:08A crocodile handbag like the one the Contessa has

0:15:08 > 0:15:10with the little claws hanging off the bottom.

0:15:12 > 0:15:14No more guessing.

0:15:14 > 0:15:15Robert?

0:15:15 > 0:15:16Mm-hmm?

0:15:16 > 0:15:17Promise we won't end up like those

0:15:17 > 0:15:19old married couples sitting opposite each other

0:15:19 > 0:15:21at dinner twiddling our forks with nothing to say.

0:15:21 > 0:15:23You, with nothing to say?

0:15:26 > 0:15:28I promise.

0:15:28 > 0:15:30We'll always tell each other the truth?

0:15:30 > 0:15:32Except around birthdays.

0:15:39 > 0:15:43Ooh! You're feisty. What have you been reading?

0:15:43 > 0:15:45What do you mean?

0:15:45 > 0:15:47No, it's nice.

0:15:47 > 0:15:49Turn out the lights.

0:15:49 > 0:15:50But I like to see you.

0:15:50 > 0:15:52Please?

0:16:11 > 0:16:13< I'll take them all.

0:16:15 > 0:16:16Excuse me.

0:16:16 > 0:16:17< Yes, I bought a suit.

0:16:17 > 0:16:20< It's being altered for Margaret Windemere.

0:16:20 > 0:16:21< Ah, Mrs Windemere!

0:16:21 > 0:16:22< One moment, please.

0:16:22 > 0:16:23< Thank you.

0:16:29 > 0:16:30Forgive me.

0:16:30 > 0:16:33You're American, aren't you?

0:16:33 > 0:16:35I'm from New York. Mrs Erlynne.

0:16:35 > 0:16:37Rhode Island. Mrs Windemere.

0:16:39 > 0:16:41I need an opinion from home.

0:16:41 > 0:16:42Now, be honest.

0:16:46 > 0:16:47Would you wear it?

0:16:52 > 0:16:56Well, it doesn't leave much to the imagination, does it?

0:16:56 > 0:16:58That depends on the imagination.

0:16:58 > 0:17:00Some men have more than others.

0:17:01 > 0:17:04I suppose it's certainly immodest.

0:17:04 > 0:17:06Do you think it's vulgar?

0:17:09 > 0:17:10Some people might.

0:17:10 > 0:17:12Is your husband with you?

0:17:12 > 0:17:14I'd love a man's opinion.

0:17:14 > 0:17:17I can tell you, he's very conservative.

0:17:17 > 0:17:20A woman doesn't always know her own husband.

0:17:20 > 0:17:21Oh, I know Robert. We've been married over a year.

0:17:21 > 0:17:25A year? Practically forever.

0:17:25 > 0:17:27Here it is, signora. >

0:17:28 > 0:17:29Oh, thank you.

0:17:29 > 0:17:31Thank you very much. Come back again to see us.

0:17:31 > 0:17:33Yes.

0:17:33 > 0:17:34Good-bye.

0:17:34 > 0:17:36You're not taking the hat?

0:17:36 > 0:17:37The colour looks perfect on you.

0:17:37 > 0:17:39Don't you like it?

0:17:39 > 0:17:40No, I have nowhere to wear it.

0:17:40 > 0:17:42It's not exactly church on Sunday.

0:17:42 > 0:17:43Why not?

0:17:43 > 0:17:46Can you imagine what people would say?

0:17:46 > 0:17:48If we're always guided by other people's thoughts

0:17:48 > 0:17:50what's the point of having our own?

0:17:52 > 0:17:53It was nice meeting you, Mrs Erwin.

0:17:53 > 0:17:54Erlynne.

0:17:54 > 0:17:56Erlynne!

0:18:12 > 0:18:14She was staying in a pensione.

0:18:14 > 0:18:17Now she's in a villa a few minutes from the club!

0:18:17 > 0:18:18Shush!

0:18:19 > 0:18:20He's there!

0:18:26 > 0:18:28I can't help seeing him.

0:18:32 > 0:18:35He comes and goes all hours of the day.

0:18:36 > 0:18:39Of course, in public, she's always with other men.

0:18:42 > 0:18:45She wears nothing but the latest fashions.

0:18:45 > 0:18:49Somebody must be giving her a very generous allowance.

0:18:50 > 0:18:54And she'll have her hand in Tuppy's pocket next

0:18:54 > 0:18:56if he doesn't wake up.

0:18:56 > 0:18:58She's nothing better than a common prostitute!

0:18:58 > 0:19:00Shush!

0:19:00 > 0:19:04And Mrs Windemere has no idea?

0:19:04 > 0:19:06None at all.

0:19:16 > 0:19:17Oh, terribly sorry.

0:19:17 > 0:19:19She must be on the terrace.

0:19:37 > 0:19:39I didn't mean to frighten you.

0:19:39 > 0:19:40Yes, you did.

0:19:40 > 0:19:42Yes, I did. What's that?

0:19:42 > 0:19:44I'm making a menu for my birthday party.

0:19:44 > 0:19:48What's Italian for lobster?

0:19:48 > 0:19:49Aragosta.

0:19:51 > 0:19:52Aragosta.

0:19:52 > 0:19:54Very good.

0:19:54 > 0:19:55Now you've made me hungry. Leave it.

0:19:55 > 0:19:58Come on, everyone's lunching at the club.

0:19:58 > 0:20:01OK, I'll get Robert.

0:20:03 > 0:20:06TELEPHONE RINGS

0:20:10 > 0:20:12Yes?

0:20:15 > 0:20:17I thought you agreed not to call me at home.

0:20:17 > 0:20:21How can I seduce you if you always bring your husband?

0:20:21 > 0:20:22Too slow!

0:20:25 > 0:20:27All right.

0:20:28 > 0:20:30Yes, yes, I'll be there.

0:20:30 > 0:20:31In an hour.

0:20:31 > 0:20:32Robert! >

0:20:32 > 0:20:33OK, in an hour. Bye.

0:20:33 > 0:20:35Robert, we're going to lunch.

0:20:35 > 0:20:37Can't. Sorry.

0:20:39 > 0:20:40You're working.

0:20:40 > 0:20:41Money never sleeps.

0:20:42 > 0:20:44Bugger!

0:20:44 > 0:20:49All paying jobs absorb and degrade the mind.

0:20:49 > 0:20:50You've never had a paying job.

0:20:50 > 0:20:52I rest my case.

0:20:52 > 0:20:54Cultivated leisure is man's true calling.

0:20:54 > 0:20:56I'm going to have to send some telegrams in town.

0:20:56 > 0:20:57I'll wait for you.

0:20:57 > 0:20:59I'll be all afternoon.

0:20:59 > 0:21:01I don't want you to waste the day.

0:21:02 > 0:21:04Do you mind, John?

0:21:04 > 0:21:05Do I mind?

0:21:05 > 0:21:07No, of course not.

0:21:16 > 0:21:19Now, if you have to escort that woman to the opera

0:21:19 > 0:21:20please don't sit with us.

0:21:20 > 0:21:21Think of Alessandra.

0:21:21 > 0:21:23Mrs Erlynne has her own seats.

0:21:23 > 0:21:25And who do you think pays for her seats?

0:21:25 > 0:21:26Her uncle just died.

0:21:26 > 0:21:27She's come into some money.

0:21:27 > 0:21:30And Mr Windemere's visits?

0:21:30 > 0:21:32He's managing her investments, of course.

0:21:32 > 0:21:34You're so fond of gossip

0:21:34 > 0:21:36you don't give the truth a chance to put its pants on.

0:21:36 > 0:21:40It's not the truth that's going without pants, Tuppy.

0:21:40 > 0:21:42Would you mind not smoking?

0:21:42 > 0:21:45It makes me feel so romantic.

0:21:45 > 0:21:49Anything too stupid to be said is sung.

0:21:49 > 0:21:50How is that romantic?

0:21:50 > 0:21:54And the women are all so fleshy.

0:21:54 > 0:21:56Excuse me, that's my foot.

0:21:56 > 0:21:58Right over here?

0:21:58 > 0:22:01(What did I tell you?)

0:22:12 > 0:22:14HE CHASTISES THE BOY IN ITALIAN

0:22:15 > 0:22:17Fried anchovies and clams in a bag. Delicious.

0:22:22 > 0:22:23Careful, it's hot.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25You told Robert we were going to the club.

0:22:25 > 0:22:27I have a very poor sense of direction.

0:22:27 > 0:22:29You have a very poor sense of decorum.

0:22:29 > 0:22:31I never use that word. I'm not sure what it means.

0:22:31 > 0:22:33At the club, we'd be with other people.

0:22:33 > 0:22:34You're right.

0:22:34 > 0:22:36Here we are, in the sunshine

0:22:36 > 0:22:38eating fish literally just off the boat

0:22:38 > 0:22:40when we could be squashed between Lord Tubby

0:22:40 > 0:22:42and Cecil the scintillating -

0:22:42 > 0:22:45listening to one or the other gripe about his digestion.

0:22:45 > 0:22:47While the Contessa, in a counter-medley

0:22:47 > 0:22:50wails that Alessandra cares more for the mating habits

0:22:50 > 0:22:52of the blue-bellied finch than those of her own species.

0:22:52 > 0:22:55And the widow Plymdale bats her eyes longingly

0:22:55 > 0:22:57at every passing pair of trou.

0:22:57 > 0:23:00All of which, mind you, is time well spent in my book.

0:23:00 > 0:23:02So, yes, I take your point. I can't argue.

0:23:02 > 0:23:03At the club, we'd be with other people.

0:23:06 > 0:23:08Afraid we'll be seen?

0:23:08 > 0:23:11Set the chins wagging?

0:23:11 > 0:23:14Do you know what I find worse than being talked about?

0:23:14 > 0:23:18Not being talked about at all.

0:23:58 > 0:24:01Mrs Erlynne will see you upstairs.

0:24:05 > 0:24:06In her bedroom.

0:24:06 > 0:24:08Thank you.

0:24:08 > 0:24:10I won't be long.

0:24:10 > 0:24:11I won't be long!

0:24:24 > 0:24:26This is expensive.

0:24:26 > 0:24:27Nothing but the best for you.

0:24:27 > 0:24:29I know. I paid for it.

0:24:29 > 0:24:30Well, there is that.

0:24:30 > 0:24:33Should we be drinking this early in the day?

0:24:33 > 0:24:36Well, somewhere in the world it's very late.

0:24:36 > 0:24:38I don't want you thinking I make a habit of this.

0:24:38 > 0:24:40Is that why you look so guilty?

0:24:40 > 0:24:42I don't like lying to her.

0:24:42 > 0:24:44I should go.

0:24:44 > 0:24:45She's only gone to lunch.

0:24:47 > 0:24:50This is all the cash I have right now.

0:24:50 > 0:24:52I'll set you up with an account.

0:24:52 > 0:24:55You can draw on it directly.

0:24:55 > 0:24:57I met Meg.

0:24:57 > 0:24:59It was by chance.

0:24:59 > 0:25:03It's all right. She had no idea who I was.

0:25:03 > 0:25:04You spoke to her?

0:25:04 > 0:25:06Mm-hmm. For a minute.

0:25:06 > 0:25:09She's very pretty.

0:25:09 > 0:25:11How did you two meet?

0:25:11 > 0:25:12Was it love at first sight?

0:25:12 > 0:25:14I have to go.

0:25:14 > 0:25:15I'm curious.

0:25:15 > 0:25:17It's only natural.

0:25:17 > 0:25:20There's no point to these questions.

0:25:20 > 0:25:21Do you love her?

0:25:21 > 0:25:22Very much.

0:25:24 > 0:25:26I'd rather cut off my arm than see Meg hurt.

0:25:26 > 0:25:29Are you protecting her or your reputation?

0:25:29 > 0:25:31You don't know me at all.

0:25:36 > 0:25:37Did he work on your wedding night?

0:25:37 > 0:25:39No! No.

0:25:39 > 0:25:40He's...

0:25:40 > 0:25:42He's very conscientious

0:25:42 > 0:25:43and I respect him for it.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45Suppose it wasn't work.

0:25:45 > 0:25:46Suppose he had a mistress.

0:25:46 > 0:25:48Well, I couldn't respect that.

0:25:48 > 0:25:50Once a wife's been betrayed

0:25:50 > 0:25:52she has the freedom to do likewise.

0:25:52 > 0:25:54No, that would make her as bad as her husband, wouldn't it?

0:25:54 > 0:25:57Modern marriage thrives on mutual deception.

0:25:57 > 0:25:59Robert and I are completely honest with each other.

0:25:59 > 0:26:00You should make him your model.

0:26:00 > 0:26:02I intend to

0:26:02 > 0:26:03from this moment on.

0:26:05 > 0:26:07Don't you like it?

0:26:08 > 0:26:10Oh, I'm saving it for Robert.

0:26:10 > 0:26:12He loves figs.

0:26:12 > 0:26:13Share mine, then.

0:26:16 > 0:26:18Can we go to the telegraph office?

0:26:18 > 0:26:20Um, he probably hasn't eaten.

0:26:24 > 0:26:26Alberto?

0:26:26 > 0:26:28Fabrizio?

0:26:28 > 0:26:30What's his name?

0:26:30 > 0:26:32Mario?

0:26:32 > 0:26:34Barman.

0:26:34 > 0:26:36Whisky.

0:26:36 > 0:26:37And another thing

0:26:37 > 0:26:39your Mrs Erlynne has no principles at all.

0:26:39 > 0:26:41Oh, I like people more than principles.

0:26:41 > 0:26:44And people without principles even better.

0:26:44 > 0:26:47But Lord Augustus, she only wants you for your money.

0:26:47 > 0:26:49Now, why shouldn't she?

0:26:49 > 0:26:50It's my best asset.

0:26:50 > 0:26:52Oldish, fattish,

0:26:52 > 0:26:53absolutely no brain,

0:26:53 > 0:26:55heaps and heaps of banknotes.

0:26:55 > 0:26:56No need to put yourself down, Tuppy.

0:26:56 > 0:26:58Your friends can always do that.

0:26:58 > 0:26:59Hear, hear.

0:27:01 > 0:27:03Down by the marina, strolling along,

0:27:03 > 0:27:05pretty as you please,

0:27:05 > 0:27:08guess who I saw with Lord Darlington?

0:27:15 > 0:27:17They haven't seen him today.

0:27:17 > 0:27:19CHURCH BELL TOLLS

0:27:38 > 0:27:40Do you know where my husband is?

0:27:40 > 0:27:42I thought he left after you, signora.

0:27:46 > 0:27:47Robert?

0:28:08 > 0:28:10Hey. How was lunch?

0:28:10 > 0:28:12We went to the telegraph office.

0:28:12 > 0:28:13Where were you?

0:28:13 > 0:28:15Well, we...

0:28:15 > 0:28:17We must have just missed each other.

0:28:35 > 0:28:37APPLAUSE

0:28:48 > 0:28:50Now I see uncle.

0:28:50 > 0:28:52He's with the American woman.

0:28:53 > 0:28:56Too much rouge and not enough clothing.

0:28:56 > 0:28:58She's appealing to the worst in the poor man.

0:28:58 > 0:29:00It's what women do best.

0:29:00 > 0:29:03I heard she left New York without paying her hotel bill.

0:29:03 > 0:29:05Quite a scandal.

0:29:05 > 0:29:07Who, someone you know?

0:29:07 > 0:29:09Someone you don't want to know.

0:29:09 > 0:29:10No. Steer clear.

0:29:10 > 0:29:13She's the one with Lord Augustus.

0:29:13 > 0:29:15You've met Mrs Erlynne, haven't you?

0:29:15 > 0:29:16No.

0:29:16 > 0:29:18But I've seen you.

0:29:18 > 0:29:20Oww!

0:29:20 > 0:29:21- Ooh, was that- your- foot?

0:29:21 > 0:29:24Wherever do you find shoes to fit?

0:29:24 > 0:29:27My feet are in perfect proportion to the rest of me.

0:29:27 > 0:29:29Oh, yes, of course.

0:29:29 > 0:29:30Though I admit they have a habit

0:29:30 > 0:29:32of finding themselves in peculiar places.

0:29:32 > 0:29:35Those people are staring right at us.

0:29:35 > 0:29:36Who?

0:29:39 > 0:29:41Oh, don't worry about them.

0:29:41 > 0:29:44It's my brother's wife and her friend Lady Plymdale.

0:29:44 > 0:29:46Lord Plymdale passed on last year.

0:29:46 > 0:29:47Liver, I think.

0:29:47 > 0:29:49Poor woman.

0:29:49 > 0:29:50Oh, yes. Very sad.

0:29:50 > 0:29:53Her hair turned quite gold with grief.

0:29:55 > 0:29:56Erlynne, that's right.

0:29:56 > 0:29:58Yeah, she-she came into some money.

0:29:58 > 0:30:00I made an investment for her.

0:30:00 > 0:30:02An inheritance, I suppose.

0:30:02 > 0:30:03Yes.

0:30:03 > 0:30:04Ah, the woman in the shop.

0:30:04 > 0:30:06I told you, remember? The dress.

0:30:06 > 0:30:09No back and almost no front.

0:30:09 > 0:30:11You could see everything. It was indecent.

0:30:11 > 0:30:13You're just not used to Italian fashions, that's all.

0:30:13 > 0:30:16Oh, no, I'm sure your wife is on the mark, Mr Windemere.

0:30:16 > 0:30:18Mrs Erlynne is a notorious jezebel.

0:30:18 > 0:30:20That's a slanderous statement.

0:30:20 > 0:30:22If you can't back it up, I wouldn't repeat it.

0:30:22 > 0:30:25Robert always gives everybody the benefit of the doubt.

0:30:25 > 0:30:26I'm sorry. I-I just don't like gossip.

0:30:26 > 0:30:28Gossip's all right.

0:30:28 > 0:30:30It's the moralizing that's in poor taste.

0:30:31 > 0:30:35She's got her eye on me, if you know what I mean.

0:30:35 > 0:30:36So I wouldn't worry about what they say about you.

0:30:36 > 0:30:38It's all cats in a bag.

0:30:38 > 0:30:40Why? What do they say about me?

0:30:40 > 0:30:42That I'm a wanton woman?

0:30:42 > 0:30:44Brazen...

0:30:44 > 0:30:45with a past.

0:30:45 > 0:30:47A brazen woman. Oh, dear.

0:30:47 > 0:30:49Well, you're very brazen yourself

0:30:49 > 0:30:50to be seen in my company.

0:30:50 > 0:30:52Well, I've got a bit of a past myself, you know.

0:30:52 > 0:30:53Married and divorced twice.

0:30:53 > 0:30:56Well, every experience is of value.

0:30:56 > 0:30:57And whatever you say about marriage

0:30:57 > 0:30:59it certainly is an experience.

0:30:59 > 0:31:01People call something an experience

0:31:01 > 0:31:02they usually mean it was a mistake.

0:31:02 > 0:31:04I couldn't agree more.

0:31:04 > 0:31:07We've all got a couple of skeletons in the closet.

0:31:07 > 0:31:09If they're going to rattle, they may as well dance.

0:31:09 > 0:31:11You're absolutely right.

0:31:11 > 0:31:14Mmm. Whenever anyone agrees with me

0:31:14 > 0:31:15I'm sure I must be wrong.

0:31:15 > 0:31:17Oh, you like to be the odd man out, do you?

0:31:17 > 0:31:20Well, I'll never understand women.

0:31:20 > 0:31:21Women don't want to be understood.

0:31:21 > 0:31:23They want to be loved.

0:31:23 > 0:31:25You're dead wrong on that.

0:31:25 > 0:31:27You're very understanding.

0:31:29 > 0:31:31That girl in lilac, do you know her?

0:31:31 > 0:31:33Um, oh, yes, yes.

0:31:33 > 0:31:35It's Robert's wife.

0:31:35 > 0:31:37Um, newlyweds. All lovey-dovey. Very charming.

0:31:37 > 0:31:39Really?

0:31:39 > 0:31:41Well, I wish she'd stop staring at me.

0:31:44 > 0:31:45She isn't at all.

0:31:45 > 0:31:47Those women must be giving her an earful.

0:31:47 > 0:31:49You mustn't mind.

0:31:49 > 0:31:51I don't as a rule.

0:31:53 > 0:31:55Look, it's terribly stuffy in here.

0:31:55 > 0:31:57I can hardly breathe.

0:31:57 > 0:31:59Shall we go? Would you mind?

0:31:59 > 0:32:01I can't think of anything I'd mind less.

0:32:01 > 0:32:03Good.

0:32:05 > 0:32:07I can't believe it.

0:32:07 > 0:32:09She's got him.

0:32:10 > 0:32:12Poor Tuppy.

0:32:23 > 0:32:25Shall I get a taxi?

0:32:27 > 0:32:28Could we walk?

0:32:28 > 0:32:30Why not.

0:32:32 > 0:32:33Beautiful city.

0:32:33 > 0:32:35The Romans call it the land of the sirens

0:32:35 > 0:32:36from Homer's Odyssey.

0:32:36 > 0:32:38Is that so? Mmm.

0:32:38 > 0:32:39Aren't you clever?

0:32:39 > 0:32:40I read it somewhere.

0:32:40 > 0:32:42Oh, I like a good read myself.

0:32:42 > 0:32:44But nothing too laborious.

0:32:44 > 0:32:45I don't want to tamper with natural ignorance.

0:32:45 > 0:32:47It's the key to happiness.

0:32:47 > 0:32:48Do you really think so?

0:32:48 > 0:32:51Oh, absolutely. Good health, it's important

0:32:51 > 0:32:52but ignorance is the key.

0:32:52 > 0:32:54Too much knowledge, and you're doomed.

0:33:04 > 0:33:05Well, here we are.

0:33:06 > 0:33:09Aren't you going to invite me in for a nightcap?

0:33:11 > 0:33:12The sirens were said

0:33:12 > 0:33:14to be half woman, half monster.

0:33:14 > 0:33:18They lured the sailors with their songs.

0:33:18 > 0:33:22The ships crashed on the rocks, and the men all drowned.

0:33:22 > 0:33:23Oh, let's go in.

0:33:23 > 0:33:26You can tell me more about it.

0:33:36 > 0:33:37Poor Lady Plymdale.

0:33:37 > 0:33:39I think she really likes Tuppy.

0:33:39 > 0:33:41Where do you suppose they went?

0:33:41 > 0:33:42Who?

0:33:42 > 0:33:44Tuppy and Mrs Erlynne.

0:33:44 > 0:33:46Probably back to her apartment.

0:33:46 > 0:33:48Probably.

0:33:48 > 0:33:51Do you think he'll invite her to my party?

0:33:51 > 0:33:53I'll make sure he doesn't.

0:33:54 > 0:33:56Well, don't be mean about it.

0:33:56 > 0:33:58Of course not.

0:33:58 > 0:33:59It's just...

0:33:59 > 0:34:01I don't want anyone to be uncomfortable, you know?

0:34:01 > 0:34:03Someone like that, it makes things awkward.

0:34:03 > 0:34:05Yes.

0:34:05 > 0:34:06You can say it's a small party -

0:34:06 > 0:34:08private, just friends. No investors.

0:34:08 > 0:34:10All right!

0:34:10 > 0:34:12Hey, it's not just girl gossip.

0:34:12 > 0:34:15John Darlington knows all about it.

0:34:19 > 0:34:21He said her friend is a married man.

0:34:21 > 0:34:23It's disgusting.

0:34:23 > 0:34:26You know what? People like to hear themselves talk.

0:34:28 > 0:34:31Why do you insist on defending her?

0:34:31 > 0:34:32I'm not defending her.

0:34:32 > 0:34:33Yes, you are.

0:34:33 > 0:34:35Let's drop it.

0:34:37 > 0:34:39It's just...

0:34:39 > 0:34:41Well, should you be helping her invest?

0:34:41 > 0:34:43I mean, everyone knows how she came into the money.

0:34:43 > 0:34:44It just doesn't look right.

0:34:44 > 0:34:46New topic.

0:34:47 > 0:34:49Close your eyes.

0:34:49 > 0:34:50Robert...

0:34:50 > 0:34:52Close your eyes.

0:34:59 > 0:35:01It's after midnight.

0:35:01 > 0:35:03Happy birthday.

0:35:18 > 0:35:20It's beautiful.

0:35:20 > 0:35:22Do you like it?

0:35:22 > 0:35:23Robert...

0:35:23 > 0:35:24Thank you.

0:35:26 > 0:35:27I love you.

0:35:27 > 0:35:29I love you, too.

0:35:38 > 0:35:40Oh, my.

0:35:42 > 0:35:44Grazie.

0:35:44 > 0:35:46Prego.

0:35:53 > 0:35:55You like it?

0:35:56 > 0:36:00Food is the rock on which we build.

0:36:02 > 0:36:05No love is pure and simple as the love of food.

0:36:05 > 0:36:09Love is rarely pure, Lord Augustus, and never simple.

0:36:09 > 0:36:11I don't think you've been in love, Mrs Erlynne.

0:36:11 > 0:36:13You may presume to call me Stella

0:36:13 > 0:36:15but don't presume to know my heart.

0:36:15 > 0:36:17For your information, I'm always in love.

0:36:18 > 0:36:19Good.

0:36:19 > 0:36:21Excellent attitude.

0:36:21 > 0:36:22And you're beautiful.

0:36:22 > 0:36:24Smart, too.

0:36:24 > 0:36:26Smarter than me, I expect

0:36:26 > 0:36:28but that's not saying much, I'm afraid.

0:36:28 > 0:36:30No, I think I'll do very well to marry you.

0:36:31 > 0:36:33How very practical.

0:36:33 > 0:36:36Oh, I've begun too many romances out of sentiment.

0:36:36 > 0:36:38They always end in settlement.

0:36:38 > 0:36:41I could listen to you all night, Lord Augustus.

0:36:41 > 0:36:42Tuppy, please.

0:36:44 > 0:36:46You'll think about my offer?

0:36:48 > 0:36:50Men don't marry women like me.

0:36:52 > 0:36:53There aren't any women like you.

0:36:53 > 0:36:55At least, not among the women that I've met

0:36:55 > 0:36:57and you can imagine I've met my share.

0:36:57 > 0:36:59I was married.

0:36:59 > 0:37:00I didn't take to it.

0:37:00 > 0:37:01People change.

0:37:01 > 0:37:03You might feel differently.

0:37:05 > 0:37:07When I think of it, I think of a room

0:37:07 > 0:37:09where you can't open a window.

0:37:10 > 0:37:12Where there is no window.

0:37:14 > 0:37:16Every day you wake up, and the room is smaller.

0:37:18 > 0:37:20You don't notice, not at first.

0:37:20 > 0:37:22It happens slowly.

0:37:22 > 0:37:24In inches.

0:37:24 > 0:37:28Then one morning, you open your eyes

0:37:28 > 0:37:30and the room's so small

0:37:30 > 0:37:32you...

0:37:32 > 0:37:34You can't move.

0:37:34 > 0:37:36You can't take a breath.

0:37:38 > 0:37:40You have to get out.

0:37:41 > 0:37:43You can't think of anything else

0:37:43 > 0:37:46or anyone else.

0:37:46 > 0:37:48You married the wrong man, that's all.

0:37:52 > 0:37:54He married the wrong woman.

0:37:56 > 0:37:57It's late.

0:37:57 > 0:37:59It's time for bed.

0:38:01 > 0:38:02Sleep.

0:38:02 > 0:38:04"...perchance to dream."

0:38:04 > 0:38:05That's the Bard, you know.

0:38:05 > 0:38:07I'm a bit of a reader myself.

0:38:07 > 0:38:09So you said. Good night, Tuppy.

0:38:13 > 0:38:15I hate the taste of tobacco.

0:38:15 > 0:38:16Oh.

0:38:18 > 0:38:20Well, that's it then.

0:38:27 > 0:38:30I quit. On the spot.

0:38:33 > 0:38:35What else can I tell you?

0:38:37 > 0:38:39I'm a very rich man, you know.

0:38:39 > 0:38:42You're a very nice man.

0:38:42 > 0:38:43Go to bed.

0:38:48 > 0:38:50You know, I'm glad I quit.

0:38:53 > 0:38:54Filthy habit, really.

0:38:59 > 0:39:00Good night.

0:39:33 > 0:39:35Is there gonna be a lion tamer

0:39:35 > 0:39:36or is it just the usual clowns?

0:39:36 > 0:39:38Robert was afraid it might rain.

0:39:38 > 0:39:40I really just wanted a few people for dinner

0:39:40 > 0:39:42but he said, "You only turn 21 once."

0:39:42 > 0:39:44I know plenty of very respectable women

0:39:44 > 0:39:46who, of their own accord, turn 35 year after year.

0:39:46 > 0:39:48I'm sure you can be 21 as many times.

0:39:48 > 0:39:50I think it's silly to lie about your age.

0:39:50 > 0:39:51You have no redeeming vices.

0:39:51 > 0:39:53I hope not.

0:39:53 > 0:39:55Happy birthday.

0:39:57 > 0:39:58The invitation said no gifts.

0:39:58 > 0:40:00That's why I brought it now.

0:40:04 > 0:40:06It's too expensive.

0:40:06 > 0:40:08Ih... I know you don't mean anything by it

0:40:08 > 0:40:09but it just wouldn't look right.

0:40:09 > 0:40:10Gold looks right with everything.

0:40:10 > 0:40:13Just wear it. No one has to know.

0:40:13 > 0:40:15Well, I'd know.

0:40:15 > 0:40:16I do mean something by it.

0:40:16 > 0:40:17Please.

0:40:17 > 0:40:18It's a gift of friendship, Maggie.

0:40:18 > 0:40:21Please. Now, you'll hurt me deeply if you refuse.

0:40:21 > 0:40:23Now look what you've made me do.

0:40:23 > 0:40:25A little sincerity can be a very dangerous thing.

0:40:25 > 0:40:27Any more of it could be fatal.

0:40:27 > 0:40:28Now just take the damn thing

0:40:28 > 0:40:30before I die and ruin your terrace.

0:40:32 > 0:40:34It's very pretty. Thank you.

0:40:38 > 0:40:39Where's Robert?

0:40:39 > 0:40:41Off sending another telegram?

0:40:42 > 0:40:45Signora, the florist is waiting for his money.

0:40:45 > 0:40:46He'll have to get it from Mr Windemere.

0:40:46 > 0:40:48I'm sorry. Can he come back later?

0:40:48 > 0:40:50Doesn't Robert keep a chequebook in his office?

0:40:50 > 0:40:51Can you sign on the account?

0:40:51 > 0:40:52Ah, yes, of course.

0:40:52 > 0:40:54Uh, tell him to wait.

0:40:54 > 0:40:55I'll see you tonight.

0:40:55 > 0:40:57People don't always behave the way we expect.

0:40:57 > 0:40:58In fact, it's really just the opposite.

0:40:58 > 0:41:00The truth is I don't want to see you hurt.

0:41:00 > 0:41:02What are you talking about?

0:41:02 > 0:41:04You may need a friend one of these days.

0:41:04 > 0:41:06When you do, I'm here.

0:41:06 > 0:41:08Will you remember that?

0:41:08 > 0:41:09Yes, of course.

0:42:47 > 0:42:49I came as quickly as I could.

0:42:49 > 0:42:52We're all so distressed over it.

0:42:54 > 0:42:57But you mustn't take it personally.

0:42:57 > 0:42:59Mrs Erlynne is one of those women

0:42:59 > 0:43:03that attract men like a bee to a flame.

0:43:03 > 0:43:04Eh?

0:43:04 > 0:43:06A moth.

0:43:06 > 0:43:08Bee to a moth. Mmm.

0:43:11 > 0:43:13There must be some other explanation.

0:43:20 > 0:43:21I have an idea.

0:43:21 > 0:43:23Shall we go for a walk?

0:43:23 > 0:43:25Hmm?

0:43:31 > 0:43:34Tesoro, when there's marriage without love

0:43:34 > 0:43:36there'll be love without marriage.

0:43:36 > 0:43:38No, but Robert and I married for love.

0:43:38 > 0:43:40You married for love, of course. And so did I.

0:43:40 > 0:43:42But before the year was over

0:43:42 > 0:43:45Benito was lifting all kinds of petticoats.

0:43:45 > 0:43:47I had to dismiss my best maid.

0:43:47 > 0:43:48Oh, no, no.

0:43:48 > 0:43:49I remember.

0:43:49 > 0:43:51I passed her on to my cousin.

0:43:51 > 0:43:54Oh, her husband was so short-sighted, I thought.

0:43:55 > 0:43:58But he navigated by scent, it seems.

0:43:58 > 0:44:00So unfortunate.

0:44:01 > 0:44:03Believe me, darling.

0:44:03 > 0:44:04It happens to us all.

0:44:04 > 0:44:07Undying love is like the ghost in your villa.

0:44:07 > 0:44:10Everybody talks about it, but try and find one person

0:44:10 > 0:44:11who has seen it.

0:44:11 > 0:44:13Come on. Come on.

0:44:15 > 0:44:17May I ask you a favour?

0:44:17 > 0:44:18Anything at all.

0:44:18 > 0:44:20About, uh, Mrs Erlynne.

0:44:20 > 0:44:21Ah...

0:44:21 > 0:44:23Very clever woman.

0:44:23 > 0:44:25She threw me out last night.

0:44:25 > 0:44:26Knows what a fool I am.

0:44:26 > 0:44:29Knows it as well as I do myself.

0:44:29 > 0:44:31She's meeting me here for tea, though.

0:44:35 > 0:44:36It's a great thing, I tell you

0:44:36 > 0:44:38to come across a woman who thoroughly understands me.

0:44:38 > 0:44:41Would you mind, uh, not bringing her to our party tonight?

0:44:42 > 0:44:43That's the favour?

0:44:43 > 0:44:46Well, Meg feels it might make things awkward.

0:44:46 > 0:44:48So it's true, then.

0:44:48 > 0:44:49I didn't believe it.

0:44:49 > 0:44:52I-I don't believe it now. You don't seem the type

0:44:52 > 0:44:54though I will say Mrs Erlynne's damn fascinating.

0:44:54 > 0:44:56Hard to resist. But...

0:44:56 > 0:44:58you're not serious, are you?

0:44:58 > 0:45:02I warn you, you'll have to fight me for her.

0:45:02 > 0:45:04And I'm a man in love.

0:45:04 > 0:45:06What are you talking about?

0:45:08 > 0:45:09This way, Mrs Erlynne.

0:45:09 > 0:45:11- Grazie. - Prego.

0:45:18 > 0:45:19Come with me.

0:45:19 > 0:45:21Where are you taking me?

0:45:21 > 0:45:22Let go of my arm.

0:45:22 > 0:45:23I have to talk to you.

0:45:23 > 0:45:25I'm meeting Lord Augustus.

0:45:25 > 0:45:26You must leave Amalfi at once.

0:45:26 > 0:45:28Leave?

0:45:28 > 0:45:29And go where?

0:45:29 > 0:45:31You've paid my rent here for the season.

0:45:31 > 0:45:32I'll pay it somewhere else.

0:45:32 > 0:45:34I want you on the first plane out tomorrow.

0:45:34 > 0:45:35- I don't understand. - People are talking!

0:45:35 > 0:45:37About us.

0:45:39 > 0:45:40I don't see the humour.

0:45:40 > 0:45:41Bury a real secret

0:45:41 > 0:45:44and a false one a pops up in its place?

0:45:44 > 0:45:46There's a certain irony, you have to admit.

0:45:48 > 0:45:50I'm not ready to leave.

0:45:50 > 0:45:51I'm enjoying myself here.

0:45:51 > 0:45:53I'm begging you.

0:45:53 > 0:45:55Think of Meg.

0:45:55 > 0:45:57If she knew that you were her mother.

0:45:59 > 0:46:00It would destroy her.

0:46:00 > 0:46:03Meg, or the magnificent Windemeres?

0:46:03 > 0:46:06Family scandal is unhealthy for aspiring politicians.

0:46:06 > 0:46:08I'm not the only pragmatist in this room.

0:46:08 > 0:46:10Pragmatist?

0:46:10 > 0:46:1220 years

0:46:12 > 0:46:14and not a word.

0:46:14 > 0:46:15You turn up when she marries a man with money.

0:46:15 > 0:46:18You call that pragmatism? I can think of other words.

0:46:18 > 0:46:20Are you trying to hurt my feelings?

0:46:20 > 0:46:21Do you have any?

0:46:21 > 0:46:24That can't be purchased, I mean.

0:46:24 > 0:46:25How much

0:46:25 > 0:46:28to get you on the first flight out?

0:46:32 > 0:46:35I feel every time he's kissed me, it's filthy.

0:46:35 > 0:46:37A lie every minute we've been together.

0:46:40 > 0:46:42How could he?

0:46:42 > 0:46:45Every man is born truthful, and every man dies a liar.

0:46:45 > 0:46:48Now, whatever you do, you mustn't make a scene.

0:46:48 > 0:46:51It's too unpleasant, and you waste energy.

0:46:51 > 0:46:55No, of course not. I wouldn't.

0:46:55 > 0:46:58Crying is the refuge of plain women.

0:46:58 > 0:47:00Pretty women go shopping.

0:47:12 > 0:47:14Be on that plane.

0:47:14 > 0:47:15I'll send the cash.

0:47:24 > 0:47:27Did I hear you correctly?

0:47:27 > 0:47:31That Meg Windemere is your daughter?

0:47:31 > 0:47:32My daughter?

0:47:32 > 0:47:34Robert's wife?

0:47:34 > 0:47:35Yes.

0:47:35 > 0:47:37How dare you.

0:47:37 > 0:47:39She must be 20 at least.

0:47:39 > 0:47:41Her mother?

0:47:41 > 0:47:43Do I look as old as all that?

0:47:43 > 0:47:45No, no, no.

0:47:45 > 0:47:46Of course not.

0:47:46 > 0:47:48I, um...

0:47:48 > 0:47:50I must've nodded off.

0:47:50 > 0:47:52You were dozing.

0:47:52 > 0:47:54Go back to sleep.

0:48:04 > 0:48:06Come on.

0:48:25 > 0:48:27Oh, no. No business tonight.

0:48:27 > 0:48:28We can talk another day.

0:48:28 > 0:48:30- Hey, good to see you. - Lovely party.

0:48:30 > 0:48:31More champagne.

0:48:31 > 0:48:33Welcome. Have a great party.

0:48:35 > 0:48:37Hey, Hubert.

0:49:04 > 0:49:05Good evening, Mr Dumby.

0:49:05 > 0:49:07Oh, good evening, Mrs Stutfield.

0:49:07 > 0:49:10Last party of the season, I suppose.

0:49:10 > 0:49:11It's been a delightful season, hasn't it?

0:49:11 > 0:49:13Oh, yes! Quite delightful.

0:49:13 > 0:49:15Good evening, Lady Plymdale.

0:49:15 > 0:49:18Well, here it is, the last party of the season.

0:49:18 > 0:49:19Oh, I suppose so.

0:49:19 > 0:49:21It's been a very dull season, though, hasn't it?

0:49:21 > 0:49:23Oh, yes, dreadfully dull.

0:49:23 > 0:49:24Evening, Cecil.

0:49:24 > 0:49:26Hello, Dumby.

0:49:26 > 0:49:28I suppose this will be the last party of the season.

0:49:28 > 0:49:29Oh, surely not.

0:49:29 > 0:49:30Probably two more at least.

0:49:30 > 0:49:33Oh, I say, Darlington, I had the oddest dream today.

0:49:33 > 0:49:35A bit of it has just come back to me.

0:49:35 > 0:49:36So what are we drinking?

0:49:36 > 0:49:38Where's the birthday girl?

0:49:38 > 0:49:39Transforming herself.

0:49:39 > 0:49:40Sausages and women.

0:49:40 > 0:49:42If you want to enjoy the experience

0:49:42 > 0:49:44never watch the preparation of either.

0:50:22 > 0:50:27JAZZ MUSIC COVERS PLEASANTRIES

0:50:49 > 0:50:51CHATTER DIES AWAY

0:50:56 > 0:50:57Is that new?

0:50:57 > 0:50:59Just out of the box. Do you like it?

0:50:59 > 0:51:01You might be a little cold. I'll get you a wrap.

0:51:01 > 0:51:02And spoil the lines? Didn't your friend

0:51:02 > 0:51:04teach you anything about Italian fashion?

0:51:04 > 0:51:05My friend?

0:51:05 > 0:51:07I saw the cheques. Don't even.

0:51:07 > 0:51:09Ah, Lady Plymdale.

0:51:09 > 0:51:10So good of you to come.

0:51:10 > 0:51:12Do you want another glass of champagne?

0:51:12 > 0:51:13I'd love some.

0:51:13 > 0:51:15Let's get us both some.

0:51:15 > 0:51:17Why don't you ask me how I am?

0:51:17 > 0:51:19I like people to ask me how I am.

0:51:19 > 0:51:21It shows a widespread interest in my health

0:51:21 > 0:51:24and you can't imagine how comforting that is.

0:51:25 > 0:51:26Lovely party, eh?

0:51:26 > 0:51:28How are you, Cecil?

0:51:28 > 0:51:29Oh, not well at all.

0:51:29 > 0:51:33I-I'd like Alessandra to meet Mr Hopper from Australia.

0:51:33 > 0:51:34Would you introduce her?

0:51:34 > 0:51:36I-would you just excuse me for one moment?

0:51:36 > 0:51:38Go with Mr Windemere.

0:51:38 > 0:51:39Thank you.

0:51:39 > 0:51:41She's my last, you know.

0:51:41 > 0:51:42I will miss her.

0:51:42 > 0:51:44But it's best to get them out of the nest

0:51:44 > 0:51:47before they turn on you.

0:51:47 > 0:51:48Girls begin by loving their mothers

0:51:48 > 0:51:50but as they grow, they judge us.

0:51:50 > 0:51:52Rarely do they forgive us.

0:51:55 > 0:51:57Oh, poor fool.

0:51:57 > 0:51:59He'll never learn.

0:51:59 > 0:52:01Which fool? Don't make me choose.

0:52:01 > 0:52:02Tuppy.

0:52:02 > 0:52:04He's brought Mrs Erlynne.

0:52:04 > 0:52:06All the women will snub her. You wait and see.

0:52:06 > 0:52:09She may have better luck with the men.

0:52:09 > 0:52:12It is because of men that women distrust other women.

0:52:12 > 0:52:15Women don't trust women. Men don't trust women.

0:52:15 > 0:52:17No one trusts women.

0:52:17 > 0:52:20It's what binds the Hindu and the Catholic.

0:52:30 > 0:52:33I know I promised, but I must tell you

0:52:33 > 0:52:35how beautiful you look tonight.

0:52:35 > 0:52:37Well, if you must, you must.

0:52:38 > 0:52:40Ah, I beg your pardon.

0:52:40 > 0:52:41I was looking for someone else.

0:52:41 > 0:52:43- Well, you found- me.

0:52:43 > 0:52:45Mrs Erlynne.

0:52:45 > 0:52:47May I call you Stella?

0:52:47 > 0:52:49Lord Augustus is getting me champagne.

0:52:49 > 0:52:51You and I can trade favours.

0:52:52 > 0:52:54Tempting, but no.

0:52:54 > 0:52:56And I'd rather he didn't see us

0:52:56 > 0:52:57standing out here under the moonlight.

0:52:57 > 0:52:59He might misunderstand.

0:52:59 > 0:53:00Hear me out.

0:53:00 > 0:53:02Windemere's fortune exceeds Tuppy's.

0:53:02 > 0:53:03Why change horses now?

0:53:03 > 0:53:06You can have what you want, and Meg's free.

0:53:06 > 0:53:07Free?

0:53:07 > 0:53:09She hasn't the courage to leave him.

0:53:09 > 0:53:12But if it's clear to her that he's with you...

0:53:12 > 0:53:13He's not.

0:53:15 > 0:53:18You've been buying idle gossip, Lord Darlington.

0:53:18 > 0:53:20You should get a refund.

0:53:20 > 0:53:22Excuse me.

0:53:22 > 0:53:24I-I had to invite her, Dumby.

0:53:24 > 0:53:26The point is she's a changed woman, transformed.

0:53:26 > 0:53:28You can see it in her eyes.

0:53:28 > 0:53:29Do you think she'd look at you if you were poor?

0:53:29 > 0:53:32Do you think I'd look at her if she were ugly?

0:53:32 > 0:53:34Fair's fair, exchange rates and so forth.

0:53:34 > 0:53:36Well, I know she's had her this and her that

0:53:36 > 0:53:39but if a man can tolerate his own past

0:53:39 > 0:53:41why not a past in his wife?

0:53:41 > 0:53:43At any rate, it's wipe the slate.

0:53:43 > 0:53:44Clean start.

0:53:44 > 0:53:46She and I, we...

0:53:46 > 0:53:48We understand each other.

0:53:48 > 0:53:50And you know what they say, every saint has a past.

0:53:50 > 0:53:53Every sinner has a future.

0:53:53 > 0:53:55And...

0:53:55 > 0:53:57HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

0:53:57 > 0:54:00I'm going to ask her to marry me if she'll have me.

0:54:00 > 0:54:04You know, you know why they call it an altar, Tuppy?

0:54:04 > 0:54:07It's where they make human sacrifices.

0:54:08 > 0:54:10I had a dream about Mrs Erlynne today.

0:54:10 > 0:54:12Yes, well...

0:54:12 > 0:54:13You couldn't help it, I suppose.

0:54:13 > 0:54:17She, uh-she is quite the woman.

0:54:18 > 0:54:20But, um, in the future

0:54:20 > 0:54:23please try to dream of someone else.

0:54:23 > 0:54:25Well...

0:54:45 > 0:54:47Don't you think you've had enough?

0:55:01 > 0:55:03Lovely party.

0:55:03 > 0:55:05Thanks for coming.

0:55:08 > 0:55:10Meg?

0:55:10 > 0:55:11I have to change.

0:55:11 > 0:55:13Did you see her?

0:55:13 > 0:55:14Don't.

0:55:14 > 0:55:15You're lovely.

0:55:15 > 0:55:18It's ridiculous on a woman her age.

0:55:18 > 0:55:20Why didn't you tell me?

0:55:21 > 0:55:24You said you were my friend.

0:55:24 > 0:55:26Men and women can't be friends.

0:55:30 > 0:55:31Meg.

0:55:31 > 0:55:32No.

0:55:51 > 0:55:54Can you stay with him?

0:55:54 > 0:55:56Can you...

0:55:56 > 0:55:58Can you get into bed with him tonight?

0:55:58 > 0:56:00Tomorrow night, nights after that?

0:56:02 > 0:56:03You said yourself, there's no forgiving a man

0:56:03 > 0:56:05who betrays his wife.

0:56:05 > 0:56:07And what will you choose, false degrading marriage

0:56:07 > 0:56:09or your own true self, free of compromise.

0:56:09 > 0:56:10I've loved you from the beginning.

0:56:10 > 0:56:12It's the truth.

0:56:12 > 0:56:13Moment you held out your hand to me in the glove shop.

0:56:13 > 0:56:15I thought, "there she is."

0:56:15 > 0:56:19And then, suppose I'd walked by without stopping?

0:56:19 > 0:56:21Just the thought of it.

0:56:21 > 0:56:23I've never loved anyone until now.

0:56:23 > 0:56:24Stop.

0:56:35 > 0:56:36John!

0:56:37 > 0:56:39Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you.

0:56:39 > 0:56:40I'm looking for Meg.

0:56:40 > 0:56:42If you see her, it's important.

0:56:42 > 0:56:44Have you had a row?

0:56:46 > 0:56:48A misunderstanding.

0:56:48 > 0:56:50Try the bar.

0:56:57 > 0:56:59Tuppy's given up smokes for her.

0:56:59 > 0:57:00Women.

0:57:00 > 0:57:03Women inspire us to great things.

0:57:03 > 0:57:05Then somehow prevent us from doing any of them.

0:57:05 > 0:57:07Look at him, he's proposing to her.

0:57:07 > 0:57:09If she says yes, it'll be his third time up the aisle.

0:57:09 > 0:57:11Hope trumps experience, Dumby.

0:57:11 > 0:57:14It's god's joke on the human race.

0:57:14 > 0:57:17He's quite convinced she's changed her spots.

0:57:17 > 0:57:20Care to make it interesting?

0:57:20 > 0:57:22I told you I was serious.

0:57:23 > 0:57:26Hasn't anyone warned you against me?

0:57:26 > 0:57:29Oh, yes. Everyone.

0:57:29 > 0:57:30Put it away.

0:57:30 > 0:57:33Now, you don't have to love me right away.

0:57:33 > 0:57:35Think of the money.

0:57:35 > 0:57:39Suppose I marry you and in a year your investments go sour.

0:57:39 > 0:57:41I'll be stuck with a pauper.

0:57:41 > 0:57:42On the other hand, I could drop dead

0:57:42 > 0:57:44on the golf course next Tuesday

0:57:44 > 0:57:46and you'd be left very well-appointed.

0:57:46 > 0:57:48Life's a gamble, Stella.

0:57:49 > 0:57:51I don't know what to say.

0:57:52 > 0:57:54People say too much as it is.

0:58:15 > 0:58:18Mrs Windemere and Mrs Erlynne.

0:58:18 > 0:58:20Look like mother and daughter, don't they?

0:58:20 > 0:58:22They're wearing the same dress.

0:58:22 > 0:58:26Well, that'll be it.

0:58:30 > 0:58:32Come away with me.

0:58:32 > 0:58:34We could set sail tonight.

0:58:37 > 0:58:39Please.

0:58:45 > 0:58:48Is this your idea of a joke?

0:58:48 > 0:58:49I need to speak to you.

0:58:49 > 0:58:50It's about Darlington.

0:58:50 > 0:58:52Follow me.

0:58:57 > 0:58:59He's in love with Meg.

0:58:59 > 0:59:01I know we said cash, so I'm raising the amount.

0:59:01 > 0:59:02I want you to leave now.

0:59:02 > 0:59:05I'd be more concerned if I were you.

0:59:05 > 0:59:06You're not me.

0:59:06 > 0:59:08And Darlington's not the problem.

0:59:08 > 0:59:09The problem is I've been lying to my wife

0:59:09 > 0:59:10and I'm not very good at it.

0:59:10 > 0:59:14I can add up the rumours and show her a big fat zero.

0:59:14 > 0:59:16I'm Tuppy's girl. Case closed.

0:59:16 > 0:59:19I'll do my own explaining. Just get out.

0:59:20 > 0:59:22I'd like to say good-bye to her.

0:59:22 > 0:59:25You said good-bye to her 20 years ago.

0:59:25 > 0:59:26No second chances.

0:59:32 > 0:59:35I'll leave first.

0:59:35 > 0:59:37We shouldn't walk out together.

0:59:37 > 0:59:38You're the expert.

0:59:40 > 0:59:41Count to 100.

1:00:36 > 1:00:37Mrs Windemere?

1:01:08 > 1:01:09'Dear Robert...

1:01:09 > 1:01:13'I thought our marriage was perfect.

1:01:14 > 1:01:17'I thought we would always be together.

1:01:17 > 1:01:21'If you love Mrs Erlynne, you should be with her.

1:01:21 > 1:01:23'I feel so foolish.

1:01:23 > 1:01:26'Everyone knew but me.'

1:01:44 > 1:01:45Meg?

1:01:47 > 1:01:48Meg.

1:01:52 > 1:01:55Meg, let me in. I want to talk to you.

1:01:56 > 1:01:58Please, open the door.

1:01:59 > 1:02:03There is nothing between me and Stella Erlynne.

1:02:03 > 1:02:05How can you think it?

1:02:05 > 1:02:06She's old, for God's sake.

1:02:06 > 1:02:07She dyes her hair.

1:02:07 > 1:02:11She...paints her face like an Indian.

1:02:11 > 1:02:14She's a cold, selfish woman.

1:02:14 > 1:02:16Not at all attractive once you know her.

1:02:17 > 1:02:21Look, she was going to damage someone.

1:02:21 > 1:02:24A person who'd never done her any harm.

1:02:24 > 1:02:26She came here with a secret...

1:02:26 > 1:02:28that would have broken your heart.

1:02:28 > 1:02:30Look, I wanted to tell you.

1:02:30 > 1:02:32I just didn't know how.

1:02:32 > 1:02:34Look, I was trying to protect you.

1:02:34 > 1:02:36You have to believe me.

1:02:36 > 1:02:40She asked me for money, and I gave it to her.

1:02:40 > 1:02:41I'm not proud of being blackmailed...

1:02:41 > 1:02:43And I didn't know what else to do.

1:02:43 > 1:02:45I should have told you at the start.

1:02:47 > 1:02:49I'm not lying to you now.

1:02:49 > 1:02:50I...

1:02:50 > 1:02:52I love you.

1:02:52 > 1:02:56And there's no other woman in my heart...

1:02:56 > 1:02:58Or in my bed.

1:02:59 > 1:03:03Meg, please open the door.

1:03:07 > 1:03:11I... We've both had too much champagne.

1:03:11 > 1:03:13We can talk in the morning.

1:03:32 > 1:03:34Thank you for coming.

1:03:34 > 1:03:36- Good night. - Lovely party. Good night.

1:03:36 > 1:03:38I'll see you at the club.

1:03:39 > 1:03:40There's the girl.

1:03:40 > 1:03:41I thought you'd fallen in with...

1:03:41 > 1:03:43Take Windemere to the club.

1:03:43 > 1:03:45Keep him out late, all night if you can.

1:03:45 > 1:03:46Get him drunk if you have to.

1:03:46 > 1:03:48Just don't let him come home.

1:03:48 > 1:03:49Why?

1:03:50 > 1:03:51What? What?

1:03:51 > 1:03:55I like you, I do.

1:03:55 > 1:03:57But if this is going to work between us...

1:03:57 > 1:03:58You can't do that.

1:03:58 > 1:03:59What? Do what?

1:03:59 > 1:04:01Where? What? Why?

1:04:01 > 1:04:04I can't always explain myself to myself...

1:04:04 > 1:04:05Let alone anyone else.

1:04:05 > 1:04:06Well, good for you.

1:04:06 > 1:04:08Takes the pressure off.

1:04:08 > 1:04:10Nine times out of 10, men don't give two pins about why.

1:04:10 > 1:04:13They just feel obliged to take an interest.

1:04:13 > 1:04:16So, I'll do exactly as you wish...

1:04:16 > 1:04:18And I'll feel as if we're married already.

1:04:18 > 1:04:20Oh, can you get yourself home all right?

1:04:20 > 1:04:24Why, Tuppy...

1:04:24 > 1:04:26You're the first man who's ever asked me that.

1:04:26 > 1:04:30I don't need to be the first, Stella.

1:04:30 > 1:04:31Just the last.

1:05:11 > 1:05:14DOOR OPENS

1:05:28 > 1:05:31There's a taxi waiting at the end of the dock.

1:05:31 > 1:05:33My husband sent you.

1:05:33 > 1:05:35Your husband thinks you're in bed...

1:05:35 > 1:05:39sleeping off a litre of Perrier Jouet.

1:05:39 > 1:05:40Let's go.

1:05:41 > 1:05:43He gave me money, that's all.

1:05:43 > 1:05:46I'm an old friend of the family, and I had him over a barrel.

1:05:46 > 1:05:47Do you think I'm stupid?

1:05:47 > 1:05:48Married to a man you love...

1:05:48 > 1:05:50And running off in the middle of the night

1:05:50 > 1:05:51with an international playboy?

1:05:51 > 1:05:52Do I think you're stupid?

1:05:52 > 1:05:54This is none of your business.

1:05:54 > 1:05:56You think just because hems are higher and woman can vote

1:05:56 > 1:05:58anything has really changed for us?

1:05:58 > 1:06:01Friends will stop calling.

1:06:01 > 1:06:03He'll be invited into homes you're not.

1:06:03 > 1:06:04You manage.

1:06:06 > 1:06:07Don't compare yourself.

1:06:07 > 1:06:10It takes practice and skill to live without regret.

1:06:12 > 1:06:15A marriage takes your whole heart.

1:06:15 > 1:06:17Selfish people can't pull it off...

1:06:17 > 1:06:19But you are not that.

1:06:19 > 1:06:22You can succeed where the rest of us fail.

1:06:22 > 1:06:24Why should I believe you?

1:06:24 > 1:06:26Don't believe me, believe him.

1:06:26 > 1:06:29He's been faithful to you, I'll swear it on my life.

1:06:29 > 1:06:31He told you to lie.

1:06:32 > 1:06:34He doesn't even know you're here.

1:06:38 > 1:06:40He never has to know.

1:06:41 > 1:06:43You want me to lie on top of a lie?

1:06:43 > 1:06:45Everything's spoiled between us. I can't.

1:06:46 > 1:06:47- What's happened to you? - Let go of me!

1:06:47 > 1:06:49Who taught you to be so unforgiving?

1:06:49 > 1:06:51You made a mistake, don't make it worse.

1:06:51 > 1:06:51You're hurting me!

1:06:51 > 1:06:53You shut your eyes to everything that isn't perfect.

1:06:53 > 1:06:56You're just asking to fall into a hole.

1:07:01 > 1:07:03Fine.

1:07:04 > 1:07:06Go ahead.

1:07:06 > 1:07:10Step over love to pick up pride and guilt.

1:07:10 > 1:07:12What will that trade be worth in a year?

1:07:12 > 1:07:15In 20?

1:07:15 > 1:07:18THEY LAUGH

1:07:28 > 1:07:31I've been throwing buns in that club...

1:07:31 > 1:07:32Big boat, Darlington.

1:07:32 > 1:07:33Does it really have to be so big?

1:07:33 > 1:07:35You know what they say about men with big boats.

1:07:35 > 1:07:36Yes.

1:07:36 > 1:07:37I should be getting home.

1:07:37 > 1:07:38You'll take a cigar, surely?

1:07:38 > 1:07:41I thought you'd quit for the love of a good woman.

1:07:41 > 1:07:43Good woman isn't exactly the moniker...

1:07:43 > 1:07:45I'd choose for Mrs Erlynne.

1:07:45 > 1:07:46You make her out to be the devil's handmaiden.

1:07:46 > 1:07:48She's nothing of the sort.

1:07:48 > 1:07:49Dumby and I are just concerned

1:07:49 > 1:07:51for your future, aren't we, Dumby?

1:07:51 > 1:07:55Devilish women are a bother, and good ones are a bore.

1:07:55 > 1:07:57That's the only difference.

1:07:57 > 1:07:59Mrs Erlynne is neither a bother nor a bore.

1:07:59 > 1:08:02Well, you change your habits, but I doubt she'll change hers.

1:08:02 > 1:08:05I've bet Dumby 50 quid.

1:08:05 > 1:08:07Now, now, enough of this.

1:08:07 > 1:08:09I won't hear any more words said against her.

1:08:09 > 1:08:11She's everything I've ever wanted in a woman.

1:08:11 > 1:08:16My dear Tuppy, in this world there are only two tragedies.

1:08:16 > 1:08:18One is not getting what one wants...

1:08:18 > 1:08:19The other is getting it.

1:08:19 > 1:08:21The last is much the worst.

1:08:21 > 1:08:24The last is a real tragedy.

1:08:24 > 1:08:28Marriage - it has its pains, ask Edna.

1:08:30 > 1:08:33Celibacy has no pleasures.

1:08:33 > 1:08:35What would you know about celibacy?

1:08:35 > 1:08:36I can learn.

1:08:36 > 1:08:37If it will prove my love.

1:08:37 > 1:08:38A woman who needs proof?

1:08:38 > 1:08:40Before she'll leave her husband.

1:08:40 > 1:08:42John, you are a cad.

1:08:42 > 1:08:45We're all in the gutter.

1:08:45 > 1:08:47But some of us are looking at the stars.

1:08:47 > 1:08:48# What men call gallantry

1:08:48 > 1:08:52# And God's adultery is far more common

1:08:52 > 1:08:56# Where the climate's sultry... #

1:08:57 > 1:08:59That's the one I bought Meg.

1:09:01 > 1:09:03For her birthday.

1:09:03 > 1:09:05You sure?

1:09:05 > 1:09:07She must have left it last week when you came for lunch.

1:09:07 > 1:09:10She was carrying it tonight.

1:09:10 > 1:09:12One fan looks very much like another.

1:09:12 > 1:09:13John?

1:09:13 > 1:09:17I... I have no idea.

1:09:17 > 1:09:19Meg's not... Not here, is she?

1:09:19 > 1:09:21No, of course not.

1:09:24 > 1:09:25What's that?

1:09:25 > 1:09:26I didn't hear anything.

1:09:26 > 1:09:27She's downstairs.

1:09:27 > 1:09:29Listen, Robert, calm down.

1:09:29 > 1:09:31You've had too much...

1:09:31 > 1:09:32Don't make an ass of yourself.

1:09:32 > 1:09:33Bloody hell.

1:09:33 > 1:09:34Too late.

1:09:34 > 1:09:35Bloody hell.

1:09:35 > 1:09:38We better put some ice on that. It's going to swell.

1:09:45 > 1:09:46I thought it was mine.

1:09:46 > 1:09:50I must have picked up Mrs Windemere's by mistake.

1:10:02 > 1:10:03Tuppy, I swear, I had no idea.

1:10:14 > 1:10:16You owe Cecil 50 quid. Sorry.

1:10:22 > 1:10:24Seems I'm the ass, Windemere. Not you.

1:11:32 > 1:11:34I spent the night on John's boat.

1:11:38 > 1:11:40I had too much to drink.

1:11:40 > 1:11:42Can I ask you to forgive me?

1:11:44 > 1:11:48I did something very stupid last night.

1:11:48 > 1:11:49I...

1:11:51 > 1:11:55You're not in my league. I made a complete ass of myself.

1:11:55 > 1:11:59Ruined it for poor Tuppy. Better now than later, I guess.

1:11:59 > 1:12:00Tuppy?

1:12:00 > 1:12:03His engagement to Mrs Erlynne is off.

1:12:06 > 1:12:08What are you talking about?

1:12:08 > 1:12:08Last night on John's yacht...

1:12:08 > 1:12:10Mrs Erlynne was waiting in his bedroom.

1:12:12 > 1:12:14Look, I was drunk. I thought...

1:12:14 > 1:12:16I saw your fan. I thought that...

1:12:16 > 1:12:19Oh, I didn't think. It was her.

1:12:19 > 1:12:21She said she took it by mistake.

1:12:21 > 1:12:23No, that's not true.

1:12:23 > 1:12:24Oh, of course not.

1:12:24 > 1:12:26Better count the spoons.

1:12:26 > 1:12:28You were right not to want her here.

1:12:28 > 1:12:30I'd have expected more from John, though.

1:12:30 > 1:12:31Tuppy's his friend.

1:12:32 > 1:12:35She didn't take my fan. I left it on...

1:12:35 > 1:12:37KNOCK AT DOOR

1:12:37 > 1:12:40There's a telephone call from America.

1:12:40 > 1:12:42It's your father, Mr Windemere.

1:12:42 > 1:12:43Not now.

1:12:43 > 1:12:47No, no, I'll take it. He'll worry.

1:12:53 > 1:12:54I love you.

1:12:54 > 1:12:55I love you.

1:13:00 > 1:13:03And a woman brought this. She's waiting downstairs.

1:13:09 > 1:13:10Thank you.

1:13:38 > 1:13:40What are you doing here?

1:13:40 > 1:13:42We had an agreement.

1:13:42 > 1:13:44I came to return the fan.

1:13:44 > 1:13:47How is your wife feeling this morning?

1:13:47 > 1:13:50You don't get within ten feet of my wife.

1:13:50 > 1:13:52I only asked how she was.

1:13:52 > 1:13:54If you're here to tell her who you are...

1:13:54 > 1:13:57It's better coming from me.

1:13:57 > 1:14:01It's my secret, not yours.

1:14:01 > 1:14:06You've kept it very well. 20 years is a long time.

1:14:06 > 1:14:11It doesn't seem to have been too much of a strain.

1:14:11 > 1:14:15You see a little girl the right age...

1:14:15 > 1:14:19You push the thought aside, close the door.

1:14:19 > 1:14:22Only at three o'clock, that in-between hour...

1:14:22 > 1:14:26Too late to do anything, too early for dinner...

1:14:26 > 1:14:30Doors come flying open.

1:14:30 > 1:14:32I don't believe you feel anything for her.

1:14:32 > 1:14:35You care about yourself, no one else.

1:14:37 > 1:14:38< Robert.

1:14:38 > 1:14:42Robert, your father needs to talk to you. He says it's import...

1:14:42 > 1:14:45Mrs Erlynne came to return your fan.

1:14:45 > 1:14:48She was just leaving.

1:14:49 > 1:14:51No, don't leave. I need to speak with you.

1:14:51 > 1:14:52But she'll miss her plane.

1:14:52 > 1:14:53Just a few minutes.

1:14:57 > 1:15:00Robert, your father is waiting on the phone. He said it was important.

1:15:02 > 1:15:04Robert?

1:15:04 > 1:15:08It would be a great mistake... to miss your plane.

1:15:20 > 1:15:23I came to make sure you got home safely.

1:15:23 > 1:15:25Oh, no, you can't leave yet. You're my only witness that nothing happened.

1:15:25 > 1:15:27Your witness?

1:15:27 > 1:15:30I'm gonna tell him the truth.

1:15:32 > 1:15:36What you did is your mistake. Your sack of bricks.

1:15:36 > 1:15:40You carry it. You don't confess and hand it off to someone who loves you.

1:15:40 > 1:15:42But everybody thinks you were having...

1:15:42 > 1:15:43They'll think it anyway. It doesn't matter.

1:15:43 > 1:15:46That's not true. It does matter. It matters to Tuppy.

1:15:46 > 1:15:48I can't be responsible for ruining that.

1:15:48 > 1:15:51You want to spoil the one good thing I've ever done?

1:15:53 > 1:15:55It's only right to tell him the truth.

1:15:55 > 1:15:59You love each other. That's your truth.

1:15:59 > 1:16:03Why are you giving up your chance at marriage to save mine? It doesn't make any sense.

1:16:03 > 1:16:07I'll tell you the truth. But first promise you're not going

1:16:07 > 1:16:08to make some grand confession.

1:16:08 > 1:16:11Swear it on whatever you hold sacred.

1:16:16 > 1:16:18I swear on my mother.

1:16:22 > 1:16:24Pardon?

1:16:24 > 1:16:26She's my guardian angel.

1:16:26 > 1:16:28My whole life I've wanted to be like her.

1:16:31 > 1:16:34I'm sure she wouldn't hold you to such a standard.

1:16:36 > 1:16:38She'd be so ashamed of me now.

1:16:40 > 1:16:43We all straddle the abyss, Mrs Windemere.

1:16:43 > 1:16:48If we never look down, how can we know who we are?

1:16:48 > 1:16:51A mother could never be ashamed of a daughter...

1:16:51 > 1:16:52who didn't fall in.

1:16:55 > 1:16:58I hope you're right.

1:16:58 > 1:17:01I've never been more certain of anything.

1:17:04 > 1:17:07I swear then.

1:17:08 > 1:17:10What is it you wanted to tell me?

1:17:13 > 1:17:14Nothing.

1:17:15 > 1:17:18I'll miss my plane.

1:17:19 > 1:17:22Good-bye, Mrs Windemere.

1:17:22 > 1:17:24I hope we meet again.

1:17:25 > 1:17:27So do I.

1:17:43 > 1:17:44Mrs Erlynne! >

1:17:46 > 1:17:48You didn't tell her?

1:17:48 > 1:17:50No.

1:17:50 > 1:17:52Why not?

1:17:54 > 1:17:56She has a mother.

1:17:56 > 1:17:59A photograph in a locket.

1:17:59 > 1:18:00It's a fairy tale.

1:18:01 > 1:18:07A kind, caring mother who loves and watches over her.

1:18:07 > 1:18:10I'm not gonna take that away.

1:18:10 > 1:18:13And neither should you.

1:19:25 > 1:19:28For one night, I thought you were in love with another woman.

1:19:28 > 1:19:31For one minute, I thought you were in love with another man.

1:19:36 > 1:19:37She was right.

1:19:37 > 1:19:39Who?

1:19:39 > 1:19:40Mrs Erlynne.

1:19:40 > 1:19:42She said, "We can't shut our eyes

1:19:42 > 1:19:43"to everything that isn't perfect...

1:19:43 > 1:19:47"otherwise we might fall into a huge abyss."

1:19:47 > 1:19:49We almost fell.

1:19:49 > 1:19:51She's a smart woman.

1:19:52 > 1:19:54She's a good woman.

1:19:55 > 1:19:57Better than I thought.

1:20:32 > 1:20:34She insisted.

1:20:38 > 1:20:39Who?

1:20:39 > 1:20:41Meg.

1:20:41 > 1:20:42Something to remember her by.

1:20:43 > 1:20:46And she explained everything.

1:20:46 > 1:20:47Everything?

1:20:47 > 1:20:50Oh, yes, of course. The flat tyre, the dog.

1:20:50 > 1:20:54The Brazilian taxi driver with a pregnant daughter who lost her purse.

1:20:54 > 1:20:58And the only thing I can say in my defence is...

1:20:58 > 1:21:00that I have no defence.

1:21:00 > 1:21:04I jumped to conclusions and thought the worst.

1:21:05 > 1:21:07Where is this old crate going to?

1:21:09 > 1:21:12Don't know.

1:21:12 > 1:21:14Will you marry me when we get there?

1:21:15 > 1:21:18A man gets the wife he deserves.

1:21:20 > 1:21:23Well, I've been a very, very bad man.

1:21:26 > 1:21:28PROPELLER WHIRRS

1:22:32 > 1:22:35You know, John, love's a battleground.

1:22:35 > 1:22:38It was only a flesh wound!

1:22:38 > 1:22:40Men advance, women resist.

1:22:40 > 1:22:44We retreat, and they block our escape.

1:22:44 > 1:22:46We can't win.

1:22:46 > 1:22:48The sexes will never understand each other.

1:22:48 > 1:22:51Only because they take such pains to deceive each other.

1:22:51 > 1:22:53Oh, hello, Dumby.

1:22:53 > 1:22:55Are you awake?

1:22:55 > 1:22:57Am I winning?