:00:15. > :00:21.It's 10 o'clock on Sunday 26th June. We were joined by the fantastic
:00:21. > :00:27.Gethin Jones. Thanks Simon. We have top guests in the studio. We've got
:00:27. > :00:33.the star of Skins, Waterloo Road and Men Behaving Badly, Neil
:00:33. > :00:38.Morrissey. He is on his way. And we have comic Jon Richardson here. And
:00:38. > :00:48.we'll do some cooking, review some gadgets and look at next week's
:00:48. > :00:51.
:00:51. > :00:56.telly. This is Something for the Weekend.
:00:56. > :00:59.Good morning. Welcome to Something for the Weekend, and welcome Gethin.
:00:59. > :01:06.Alex Jones stood in for me the other day, so we thought it would
:01:06. > :01:16.be nice to have the Joans dynasty on the show. They asked for Tom,
:01:16. > :01:21.Kelly, and... Aled. Yes! It's lovely to be here. And I'm here
:01:21. > :01:25.instead of Tim, who apparently is having a holiday in Glastonbury.
:01:25. > :01:31.Tim is at Glastonbury. You always have that image that when it's
:01:31. > :01:38.raining at Glastonbury Tim will be in the rain. But no, niece a posh
:01:38. > :01:44.house, in a VIP area. I can't imagine Tim cheering and dancing.
:01:44. > :01:49.He'll be miserable somewhere, and moaning. That's U2. I've watched a
:01:49. > :01:58.wit of Glastonbury and the person I thought was fantastic was Jesse J.
:01:58. > :02:04.They've got a great line-up at Glastonbury. They had trinchy
:02:04. > :02:09.strider -- Tinchy Stryder. concert went very well I believe.
:02:09. > :02:14.Will Tim be at the front moring? Apparently there are two farms.
:02:14. > :02:21.9,000 people are sleeping on the farm and there's a posh farm
:02:21. > :02:26.further down the road. He's definitely not on the farm. I know
:02:26. > :02:32.where he is. He's there with a cup of tea watching us, chilling.
:02:32. > :02:40.be watching now. Morning. Alright? Designer wellies? No, I don't think
:02:40. > :02:46.so. Another festival at such this week is the Smurf fefrl. It is
:02:46. > :02:51.National Smurf Week. I like the way you've pitched the tone of this,
:02:51. > :02:56.Gethin, highbrow. It's a bit different. Up to 5,000 people all
:02:56. > :03:01.over the world, 11 different cities, all getting together to celebrate
:03:01. > :03:07.being a Smurf. Apparently the most amount of people turned up in
:03:07. > :03:12.Dublin. I really liked the Smurfs as a little girl but you don't
:03:12. > :03:17.remember then. I think I'm too old. Too old for the Smurfs? That's
:03:17. > :03:26.terrible. On a similar vein, because 5,000 people dressed as
:03:26. > :03:30.Smurfs, but you did a similar thing, the Joneses. What I did, I was part
:03:30. > :03:37.of this world record for the most amount of people with the same
:03:37. > :03:44.surname gathered under the same roof. 1,5 83 Joneses turned up to
:03:44. > :03:48.break the record. It is quite a lot of Joneses in one room.
:03:48. > :03:52.mentioned them a lot. They came from all over the world but mainly
:03:52. > :03:56.from Wales. I would have thought the majority of them would have
:03:56. > :04:02.been in Wales. We are surprised that normally something like this,
:04:02. > :04:07.we are amazed that we forget to get Wayne dressed up as a Smurf.
:04:07. > :04:15.Normally poor old Wayne Collins is the man who has to dress up. He
:04:15. > :04:20.didn't run up. Run now, Wayne! We have top median Jon Richardson here
:04:20. > :04:25.to talken about his stand-up tour and his obsessive personality. And
:04:25. > :04:31.fill the fridge up with lager, as our other guest is Neil Morrissey
:04:31. > :04:35.of Men Behaving Badly. He is on his way, apparently. We hope! If you
:04:35. > :04:40.have a question, contact us through bbc.co.uk/somethingfortheweekend,
:04:40. > :04:44.or tweet us. Simon, what are we making today? Cheer me up. What
:04:44. > :04:48.might be interesting if Neil doesn't make up will you be the
:04:48. > :04:53.first person to present and be interviewed on the same show.
:04:53. > :05:01.you trod stand in? I'm ready. have some questions lined up This
:05:01. > :05:08.is a fix! I can't believe it. got Chinese pork and watermelon
:05:08. > :05:14.salad, pork belly slowly cooked. There is watermelon and mooli, and
:05:15. > :05:20.plum sauce. And a veggie main course, Moroccan parcels with an
:05:20. > :05:27.aubergine stew. Aubergine, tomato and cumin. Chickpeas, sweet potato,
:05:27. > :05:37.beautiful Moroccan spices. I love pastry. This is an old school
:05:37. > :05:46.dessert. Chocolate swirl cake. It is quite springy in texture but
:05:47. > :05:53.delicious. And then crab risotto cake with broad been puree. It is
:05:53. > :05:59.crab, broad beens, lemon and garlic. When you know why I said yes to
:05:59. > :06:03.coming on the show. It looks fantastic. All our recipes can be
:06:03. > :06:09.found on the website - bbc.co.uk/somethingfortheweekend.
:06:09. > :06:19.Here is what else is happening on the show today.
:06:19. > :06:23.You can sniff out this new series, it is Perfume. Ooooh. From Alfie to
:06:23. > :06:31.Zulu, it's the many faces of Michael Caine. It is a fabulous
:06:32. > :06:41.part to play. And the big man is on to the baddies again in Luther.
:06:41. > :06:45.Eliminate him. All that to come, plus Sultan of
:06:45. > :06:50.mixology Wayne Collins will be here, possibly dressed as a Smurf, warn?
:06:51. > :06:59.If only I knew I would have made some blue drinks today. What are
:06:59. > :07:05.you making? We are in the midst of a tins frenzy so I'll be making
:07:05. > :07:08.cocktails. Thank you Papa Smurf. Simon, what are we doing? Pork
:07:09. > :07:14.Simon, what are we doing? Pork belly and watermelon sad. We have
:07:14. > :07:20.mooli, it is white radish, used in Chinese cooking. It is an unusual
:07:20. > :07:26.flavour. On its own it's a bitter flavour, but with the watermelon
:07:27. > :07:34.the sweetness combines. We have garlic and melon. With the pork
:07:34. > :07:40.belly we've got sugar, cumin, salt. The dressing is plum saw, black
:07:40. > :07:47.rice vinegar and yoghurt. First job. Don't look at me like that, Simon.
:07:47. > :07:53.I like it, you have stkpot a bit of pressure on me. -- I like it,
:07:53. > :08:03.you've got a bit of pressure on you. No pressure. The first job, Gethin,
:08:03. > :08:08.
:08:08. > :08:14.is to score the skin. This is tough. What we are looking to do is get
:08:14. > :08:21.the crackle. If you want good crackle on any joint of pork...
:08:21. > :08:27.we have to cut this right the way through? It doesn't look good like
:08:27. > :08:33.that, does it? Let's be honest. think it does. Oh, Simon, no. Do
:08:33. > :08:40.you not No, it is awful. It is slightly, looks like a bit of leg.
:08:40. > :08:45.Like a proper human leg. It is quite hairy. Missed a bit shaving.
:08:45. > :08:50.I think it is a bit like myself, to be honest. Fat on the top and a bit
:08:50. > :08:56.hairy on the belly. Maybe you're right, maybe it's not nice. But it
:08:56. > :09:01.will look lovely cooked. If you are cooking pork, and crack sling what
:09:01. > :09:08.everybody wants to get right. -- crackling is what everybody wants
:09:08. > :09:12.to get right. Score it like this. I'm half-cutting it. Cut it so you
:09:12. > :09:20.get through the hard skin. I can't believe the first job you've given
:09:20. > :09:24.get yib is -- Gethin is trying to cut flesh! I thought this would be
:09:24. > :09:31.a long job and Lou would crack on with something else, but you are
:09:31. > :09:36.actually waiting for me. We are going to grate this. OK. Hold on
:09:36. > :09:42.tight so it doesn't wobble and mover it backwards and forwards.
:09:42. > :09:50.I've scored the belly. Finally! If you want good crackling on pork.
:09:50. > :09:56.This is going to take me half an hour! Be more manly, Lou. First of
:09:56. > :10:03.all we've got to have this as dry as possible. Then squeeze a load of
:10:03. > :10:08.lemon on to here. How long die have to do this? I'm just enjoying
:10:08. > :10:15.watching you mess that up. Squeeze the lemon on to there. Rub the
:10:15. > :10:20.lemspwhoon that surface. This is tough! -- Rub the lemon into that
:10:20. > :10:26.surface. This is tough! As we begin to cook it, the acid and the fact
:10:26. > :10:33.will react together. Is that the way to make it crispy? Is that the
:10:33. > :10:38.only way? No, if you've never had successful crackling, try it this
:10:38. > :10:45.way. I've never had successful crackle until today. Rub loads of
:10:45. > :10:52.salt into this. This is quite a nice smelling. Let me do a little
:10:52. > :10:59.bit more. You are not a fan of cooking, are you? I've actually got
:10:59. > :11:05.so much better since I've done this show. Yes, you have, Lou. I wasn't
:11:05. > :11:11.sure if I had to join in that the point. I do season things now.
:11:11. > :11:16.was a big thing when we started, that's true. So, you rub loads of
:11:16. > :11:23.salt into there. Then you need to cut this into strips about that
:11:23. > :11:30.kind of size. Lou, now you have done that, the next job for you -
:11:30. > :11:39.let me wash my hands - is cut the cucumber down the middle length
:11:39. > :11:43.ways and scoop out the seeds. Get the spoon and drag it down. We've
:11:43. > :11:51.told Neil Morrissey to get here quickly for. This He needs to be
:11:51. > :11:56.here to taste. And cut these into half moons, the thickness of a �1
:11:56. > :12:01.coin. Do you cook, Gethin? No, I leave that to the other half. She's
:12:01. > :12:10.brilliant at it. She is. She's been on here and she cooks well. She's
:12:11. > :12:14.fantastic. I'm good at clearing up, washing up, but it is imagination I
:12:14. > :12:17.struggle with. And the time to prepare. All of this stuff is
:12:17. > :12:22.amazing. I would never think to put something like this together.
:12:22. > :12:27.think it helps if you are a foodie, if you enjoy different foods. Then
:12:27. > :12:31.I think you experiment more. Whereas if you are into cheese
:12:31. > :12:39.sandwich... When it takes half an hour to make this, doesn't it take
:12:39. > :12:44.you half an hour, whereas it would take me three hours to make it!
:12:44. > :12:49.anyone who doesn't cook, the best way to start cooking is start with
:12:49. > :12:53.a small number of dishes and learn to cook them really well. So if you
:12:54. > :12:58.can cook curry, a spaghetti bolognese and then a piece of fish,
:12:58. > :13:06.if you hone the recipes it will give you confidence. Then you can
:13:06. > :13:12.sigh, I can do those four, so let's have another two. That's the way to
:13:12. > :13:18.start cooking. Right on the flesh side we've got sugar, five spice,
:13:18. > :13:23.ginger and salt. Mix that around. Turn it over. Gethin, the same as
:13:23. > :13:32.you did with the lemon and salt, rub our spice mix into the flesh
:13:32. > :13:40.side. Pressing it on. When that goes in, skin-side up into that
:13:40. > :13:47.tray. What am I supposed to be doing? Are you exhausted? Always
:13:47. > :13:53.the first cook, snoocts like having your children in the kitchen --
:13:53. > :13:58.is like having your children in the kitchen! It is. In front of you,
:13:58. > :14:04.Lou, you've got the plum sauce, the yoghurt and rice vinegar. Shall I
:14:04. > :14:09.put it in? No! The plum sauce into there, with a quarter of that black
:14:09. > :14:17.rice vinegar. If you can't get hold of black rice vinegar you can use
:14:17. > :14:23.any vinegar, but I would suggest malt vinegar. A quarter of it there.
:14:23. > :14:26.With all of that yoghurt, mix that around. Is that vinegar quite easy
:14:26. > :14:31.to get? You can sometimes get it in the high street supermarkets these
:14:31. > :14:35.days, but if you can't, malt vinegar is fine. I wouldn't use
:14:36. > :14:40.balsamic, because it is too strong. Maybe a white wine vinegar or a red
:14:40. > :14:48.wine vinegar or a sherry vinegar. It is hard to find a good balsamic.
:14:48. > :14:58.It is really tough. I have balsamic vinegar on everything. We were on
:14:58. > :14:58.
:14:58. > :15:02.holiday in soreent o -- Sorento and we brought some back from There
:15:02. > :15:06.Sometimes we overuse balsamic vinegar. We will tend to use it as
:15:07. > :15:11.a cure-all, with every deregulation and salad. Sometimes it can
:15:11. > :15:14.overpower flavours. This the flavour would be wrong with our
:15:14. > :15:23.oriental spice. This is our beautiful spicy pork. That goes
:15:23. > :15:28.into the oven. Cover it. Cook for all of that fat. After two hours
:15:28. > :15:36.take the cover off and pop it under the grill for three or four minutes
:15:36. > :15:42.to crisp it up. The smell of this, Gethin... So grill it? It is not
:15:42. > :15:52.essential, but have a whiff of that, young man. When I walked in this
:15:52. > :15:56.
:15:56. > :16:00.morning it smeld like sausage garlic off with the pork. So this
:16:00. > :16:05.is now lovely soft, delicious roast garlic.
:16:05. > :16:10.That's a good idea. So put it in a half a clove and break it up?
:16:10. > :16:16.just roast it. Now, Lou, put half of the dressing
:16:16. > :16:21.into the bowl there. Giver it a mix around. Meanwhile, what we do with
:16:21. > :16:25.our watermelon. That is going to be lovely and delicious and fresh
:16:25. > :16:30.alongside this. Think of the flavours, the intense flavour with
:16:31. > :16:36.the pork, then the light flavours with the vinegar in the salad, then
:16:36. > :16:40.the final flavour is this lovely fruitiness, the freshness with the
:16:40. > :16:48.watermelon and pork and melon is a lovely combination.
:16:48. > :16:54.So, to serve this we layer this up. A little bit of that, there we go,
:16:54. > :17:02.and then, we don't need loads of this. This is intense in flavour.
:17:02. > :17:09.So we spoon on the cucumber, the spring onion and the mooli. We then
:17:09. > :17:14.sit the little bits of pork on the side. Then you can taste the salad.
:17:14. > :17:20.And springle it with sesame seeds which gives it crunch and flavour.
:17:20. > :17:28.This is the sweet chilli sauce. So, the pork takes the tame. The
:17:28. > :17:32.rest is simple? Yes, dead simple. Gethin, take a little bit of this
:17:32. > :17:36.lovely delicious pork. The melon make it is sweet. That is
:17:36. > :17:43.lovely. You get the really lovely sweet and
:17:43. > :17:46.sour thing going on. Gethin? It is like a healthy Chinese? Yeah,
:17:46. > :17:51.that's good. Delicious. Amazing how it comes
:17:51. > :17:55.together so quickly. Now, that's the starter, what are for the
:17:55. > :18:00.mains? A Moroccan parcels with aubergine, Lou and I! All of the
:18:00. > :18:06.recipes can be found on the website:
:18:06. > :18:14.Time now for a new series about the characters that work in the multi-
:18:14. > :18:18.billion pound perfume industry, we billion pound perfume industry, we
:18:18. > :18:22.meet Chandler Beurrgh. Chandler writes at home, inundated
:18:22. > :18:28.by a fragrant tsunami. This is the delivery, there is a
:18:28. > :18:38.lot of it. This is eve saint Lauren. This is
:18:38. > :18:43.
:18:43. > :18:53.Bliss. Yeah! This is Love.
:18:53. > :18:54.
:18:54. > :19:03.Now... No! The Love is juicy fruit gum.
:19:03. > :19:13.OK, this is sort of Lord of the Rings. It looks like somebody would
:19:13. > :19:13.
:19:13. > :19:20.throw this at you. Oh! Doesn't disappoint! Oh, my God! This is
:19:20. > :19:27.great. Oh, hang on one second. Hey, how u
:19:27. > :19:35.are you? -- hey, how are you? Another one. Did you combi jerd?
:19:35. > :19:42.Thank you. -- did you come here yesterday? Thank you. This is Bliss,
:19:42. > :19:51.this is the Marc Jacobs. I'm going to do this here. This is
:19:51. > :19:58.interesting. This, this is a fruit.
:19:58. > :20:03.And if you like the smell of that, you can catch a waft of Perfume on
:20:03. > :20:07.Tuesday at 9.00pm on BBC Four. The first guest is probably best known
:20:07. > :20:13.for playing the hapless Tony in Men Behaving Badly and starring in
:20:13. > :20:20.Waterloo Road and Skins, but the first big break on British TV was
:20:20. > :20:27.Rocky alongside Michael Elphick in Boon.
:20:27. > :20:31.Hi, Rocky. Dare I ask, how are you? Oh, Ken, I had to do it, man. I
:20:31. > :20:37.didn't want to, but they made me an offer I could not refuse.
:20:37. > :20:41.What are you talking about? It is Texas Ranger, we sold it.
:20:41. > :20:48.You are joking, what happened? Things started to get really tight.
:20:48. > :20:53.I had to drop me prices every week. I did it all myself. Jed made me an
:20:53. > :20:59.offer. Was it a good offer? Yeah. You made
:20:59. > :21:07.a profit? Well... You made a loss? No. No. I broke even.
:21:07. > :21:10.He has never looked back. Welcome to Something For The Weekend, it is
:21:10. > :21:15.Neil Morrissey. Hello, baby face.
:21:15. > :21:20.That was a long time ago. We have had a tweet: Neil, did you
:21:20. > :21:25.get to keep the leather jacket from Boon? No, I didn't. I really wanted
:21:25. > :21:32.that jacket. It would have been vintage now?
:21:32. > :21:39.Totally! It has all of the metal studs on the back, if was practical
:21:40. > :21:44.for a biker with that. Somebody must have that jacket.
:21:44. > :21:51.Yeah! Let's get that jacket back. Start off a petition. So, Men
:21:51. > :21:56.Behaving Badly, a huge show, an iconic show, did you have as much
:21:56. > :22:01.fun making it as we did watching it? It was a complete hoot. I can
:22:02. > :22:09.see in every scene where we are trying to hold back the lafters
:22:09. > :22:17.amongst ourselves, it what -- the laughter amongst ourselfs.
:22:17. > :22:22.Did you play with the script? we were tight with the script.
:22:22. > :22:30.Great writing made the show su Peterborough -- superb. We rarely
:22:30. > :22:35.went off piste. Which is bizarre, when people watch
:22:35. > :22:39.the show, we really think that you were drunk. Did it happen? No. No.
:22:39. > :22:44.You can't do it. There are seven cameras knocking about.
:22:44. > :22:48.There are 600 people in the audience and seven cameras.
:22:48. > :22:55.Of course, you had an audience. We forget that watching it at home.
:22:55. > :23:00.How many years did it go on for? think we did seven series plus a
:23:00. > :23:06.Christmas special. You won BAFTAs, TV awards, so many.
:23:06. > :23:11.So many, darling! It was a real roller-coaster of a time. It was
:23:11. > :23:15.fantastic. We hit the era right. Would it come back? I'm sure that a
:23:15. > :23:20.lot of people, there have been a few tweets from people asking to
:23:20. > :23:27.see it again. Tweeting all the time.
:23:27. > :23:32.It didn't happen in Boon's day. There were only three channels
:23:32. > :23:35.then! There is no reason it could not come back. Everybody is around.
:23:35. > :23:40.Everybody is working, obviously Martin, there is no reason for it
:23:40. > :23:47.not to come back? No reason whatsoever. I would love to see
:23:47. > :23:52.what is going on in their lives. In the final episode, Martin and
:23:52. > :23:56.Carolyn's characters had a baby called Kylie, of course. Kylie
:23:56. > :24:00.would be 14 now. That would be great.
:24:00. > :24:05.On another side to your character, at the beginning of the year, we
:24:05. > :24:10.had an insight into the real you. You did something very serious when
:24:10. > :24:15.you did Care Home Kids, the dumentary. Why did you want to do
:24:15. > :24:20.that? The BBC, they came to talk to me about an idea about doing
:24:20. > :24:26.something like this. Once it was brought up, there was, I realised
:24:26. > :24:31.in myself there was a whole part of my life, a whole chunk of my life
:24:31. > :24:38.that I had scant memories of. That was the time from when I was ten
:24:38. > :24:43.years old until I was 17. Most people have family albums to give
:24:43. > :24:48.you your life story. But I had no record of my life at
:24:48. > :24:54.all, apart from what was just in here. I wanted to go back and find
:24:54. > :24:59.out what it was, why I was in care. What happened while I was there.
:24:59. > :25:02.You spend so much time running away from it when you get old enough,
:25:03. > :25:07.you don't always realise what was going on at the time. So apart from
:25:07. > :25:11.the fact I wanted to know what was going on with the system, but I
:25:11. > :25:16.wanted to know what was going on with my life at the time. It was
:25:16. > :25:23.really cathartic to find old friends, social workers, get the
:25:23. > :25:29.documentation, from the police, the social services -- services, from
:25:29. > :25:36.the schools. To put together a picture of what was.
:25:36. > :25:41.Is that why you became an ambassador for Barnardo's? You
:25:41. > :25:45.could empathise with what was going on? Absolutely. There are a lot of
:25:45. > :25:51.charities designed to help people who have been in care, Barnardo's
:25:51. > :26:00.is one of those. The point behind the campaign is to raise �100,000
:26:00. > :26:05.via the website. It is a Facebook website, called Keep Britain
:26:05. > :26:12.Smiling. Once we have 1 million smiles, that trance laets einto
:26:12. > :26:18.�100,000 for Barnardo's, that is unbelievable -- translates.
:26:18. > :26:23.Do you think, Neil, that pushed you on to being a successful actor in
:26:23. > :26:27.this industry? The fact that you were in care as well, it was
:26:27. > :26:34.unique? Did you create the opportunity to be fostered so that
:26:34. > :26:38.you could go to University? When I look back on my earlier life, how
:26:38. > :26:45.focused I was on getting into acting, in all of the local youth
:26:45. > :26:49.drama, everything that I used to do, it took up all of my time. It was
:26:49. > :26:53.this job, that is what it was. There was a balance of nature,
:26:53. > :26:56.nurture. I was very, very determined. I don't think that
:26:56. > :27:01.being in care should hold anyone back, but I will not say that it
:27:01. > :27:08.made me want to do more, perhaps it did, perhaps not.
:27:08. > :27:11.We have not got than far with my anist yet! It has -- With my
:27:11. > :27:16.analyst yet. Well, it has definitely given you
:27:16. > :27:26.lots of work. You are unstoppable at the moment, you are doing a
:27:26. > :27:27.
:27:27. > :27:31.movie? I am working with Ray Rooney. I'm in a movie with Danny Dyer, and
:27:31. > :27:35.doing a run of the West End production of Oliver!.
:27:35. > :27:42.That is singing and dancing, we know you can sing.
:27:42. > :27:52.I have had three number ones. More than Morrissey the singer! Go on!
:27:52. > :28:05.
:28:05. > :28:15.Go on! BOB THE BUILDER. # Bob the builder. # We were top
:28:15. > :28:15.
:28:15. > :28:21.the -- of the charts. We sold 1.million coppice of that. We
:28:21. > :28:27.knocked Sir Empey off the charts and we prevented west life from
:28:27. > :28:34.breaking a The Eagles record, it was set seven times in a row, sorry
:28:34. > :28:39.the Beetles, record. It would have been broken were it not for Bob The
:28:40. > :28:46.Builder. But it is not popular in Japan?
:28:46. > :28:52.Japan, Bob has four fingers, they thought that Bob must be a gangster
:28:52. > :28:56.as the Yakuza, the big Japanese gangsters they chop off a finger to
:28:56. > :29:01.prove their loyalty. So I think that they had to put in an extra
:29:01. > :29:07.finger. So it was OK, then? Yes.
:29:07. > :29:17.Neil, thank you for coming in and hanging around, you are doing some
:29:17. > :29:19.
:29:19. > :29:28.cooking later? Yes. If you want to ask us a question,
:29:28. > :29:31.just send us an e-mail at: Now, it is time for Deja Vu.
:29:31. > :29:38.# Baggy trousers # Dirty shirts
:29:38. > :29:44.# Teacher comes to break us up # Hit us over the head with a
:29:44. > :29:48.plastic cup # Oh, what fun we had. # Nigel
:29:48. > :29:52.Short has been concentrating on chess since he was five. He cleared
:29:52. > :29:56.the way to becoming the international chess master... The
:29:57. > :30:01.West Ham team confounded the experts with their win. Only in
:30:01. > :30:11.this part of East London where they econvinced that thinker team would
:30:11. > :30:21.
:30:21. > :30:27.bring back the cup for the second You're wearing make-up! I'm sorry,
:30:27. > :30:34.sorry, I have run out of cold cream. Put in a requisition, Sergeant
:30:34. > :30:41.Major. I has already put in a requisitioner, Sir - for hand
:30:41. > :30:46.grenades. Well put in the cold cream. And we could do with more
:30:46. > :30:53.powder puffs, please. Baggy Trousers stayed in the charts for
:30:53. > :31:00.20 weeks but which year was it. Simon? I get worse at this. I get
:31:00. > :31:07.confuse. We were using all your years up. This is the late '70s or
:31:07. > :31:17.early '80. I would have said middle to late '80s. Am I miles out?
:31:17. > :31:18.
:31:18. > :31:24.can't help you. I reckon, I'm going for '87. I'm going '79. We are like
:31:24. > :31:31.nearly a decade apart. I know! In our life as well. Can I just say, I
:31:31. > :31:38.noticed when we came back to you, normally when Tim and I are here I
:31:38. > :31:45.look at him in the monitor and he looks washed out and you are not!
:31:46. > :31:55.It is because I've got a lot of make-up on. So have I! Now your
:31:56. > :31:57.
:31:57. > :31:59.goodies. Kirsty from south Ayrshire made this for her husband, with the
:31:59. > :32:08.made this for her husband, with the Fonz T-shirt. Good work. This is
:32:08. > :32:15.Steve from the Netherlands. He made the bruebry coffee cake. He lives -
:32:15. > :32:22.- bruebry coffee cake. He lives in the Netherlands with his while. The
:32:22. > :32:27.catwalked off. In looks home-made, countryish. A good observation.
:32:27. > :32:34.Another Fonz pose and good smile. This was baked by her sister,
:32:34. > :32:41.Kelsey, 21. She's just finished her history degree at Lancaster
:32:41. > :32:45.University. She live on the Isle of Man. This one, Sue reed in
:32:45. > :32:52.Westchester in the United States of America sent this is. That's their
:32:52. > :33:00.pet snake. That isn't her. Who is in the picture is her son, Henry.
:33:00. > :33:08.This, ladies and gentlemen, is Lisa, their au pair from Sweden. Anyone
:33:08. > :33:14.else want to send us their pictures of their au pair from Sweden, feel
:33:14. > :33:16.free. Don't anyone take imup on that. Do! Contact us via
:33:16. > :33:21.bbc.co.uk/somethingfortheweekend. It is the same whether you are in
:33:21. > :33:30.Sweden or the UK. I'm movering closer to you. Are you, darling? I
:33:30. > :33:35.like that. Simon, what am I making? A Moroccan spiced parcel. I'm
:33:35. > :33:40.serving it with an aubergine stew. Parsley, aubergine, cumin, tomato
:33:40. > :33:47.puree, fresh tomatoes and garlic. That you will love, because it is
:33:47. > :33:54.simple to make. Delicious flavours. Puff pastry from the fridge. Mint,
:33:54. > :34:02.parsley, honey, chickpeas, toasted flaked almonds, dried apricots,
:34:02. > :34:09.salt, paprika, turmeric, cumin and chilli flaifpblgts spinach, sweet
:34:09. > :34:15.wheat -- chilli flakes. Spinach, sweet potato cubed. In reality all
:34:15. > :34:21.of these have come out of packets or tins. You just need to write a
:34:21. > :34:28.list when going to the shop. Yes, need a list for this kind of
:34:28. > :34:31.cooking. I like lists full stop. you have all these things in your
:34:31. > :34:37.kitchen anyway? Pretty much. reckon I have onions and tomatoes.
:34:37. > :34:41.That's pretty much it. We'll do a store cupboard of essentials for
:34:41. > :34:46.you. But coming back to this, these are things you don't need to cook.
:34:46. > :34:51.Just buy. All we've done in terms of the cooking of this is we've
:34:51. > :34:55.peeled and cubed a sweet potato, put into it boiled water for two
:34:55. > :35:00.minutes. The onion is cooked for five minutes until it is
:35:00. > :35:04.caramelised. First job, Lou, cut those into quarters. I will chop
:35:04. > :35:11.the spinach and the herbs and spices. Then chuck it all in. If
:35:11. > :35:17.you imagine all the flavours in a tagine, that's the kind of flavour
:35:17. > :35:22.you are looking for. When you were veggie you really rely on good,
:35:22. > :35:27.strong flavours. You don't get the chew element in food. It's a really
:35:27. > :35:32.big thing. One of the things always, particularly if veggies are cooking
:35:32. > :35:37.for meat eaters, the textural thing is a massive thing. As meat eaters,
:35:37. > :35:44.what everyone craves that bit of texture that resistance. A burg ser
:35:44. > :35:53.a good example. We love the -- a bigger is a good chal. We love the
:35:53. > :35:59.chewiness. Mix it round, with a pinch more salt in there as well.
:35:59. > :36:05.Have you had a good week, Simon? You know, I have had quite a good
:36:05. > :36:11.week. I've been bizy, as I always am. He a day in London doing pretty
:36:11. > :36:21.much nothing on Friday. I came down with Ali, my wife, with the kids,
:36:21. > :36:26.and we did nothing. But treat her? Always treat her. You are such a
:36:26. > :36:30.romantic, Simon. Mix all of that together. She didn't want to go
:36:30. > :36:35.shopping, which was good. So you were happy with that. That meant
:36:35. > :36:42.you doesn't to buy her anything. don't mind that, but I get bored
:36:42. > :36:49.shopping, do you know what I mean? Have you bought your shoes this
:36:49. > :36:54.week? LAUGHTER No, I haven't. Can I clear something up. I don't shop
:36:54. > :36:59.very often. I shop sometimes as a necessity for work, but when I'm at
:36:59. > :37:03.home I do did school run. I wear jeans and trainers every day, or
:37:03. > :37:09.some days. Simon, don't make me feel guilty. I have enough of that
:37:09. > :37:15.at home. It was a purely, "What have we done this week?" I didn't
:37:15. > :37:21.have a shop. I did have a shop, I'm not going to lie. He a quick whizz
:37:21. > :37:26.around. Anything nice? You can always find something nice. Do you
:37:26. > :37:32.always buy something when you go out? Do you feel it a necessity?
:37:32. > :37:37.That's where men and women differ. I work hard for my money, so I
:37:37. > :37:42.don't waste it. I sometimes waste it. If I want to shop for clothes I
:37:42. > :37:48.will look, but if I don't find what I want I will walk away. Don't you
:37:48. > :37:55.think men just grab anything, like, "That will do." I don't think I
:37:55. > :38:02.ever do, that Lou. I see something but then I check everywhere else
:38:02. > :38:07.and always go back to the first one. Yeah, yeah. Now, we've got all
:38:07. > :38:12.those lovely flavours in there. Gorgeous. To make this into our
:38:12. > :38:18.parcel. You just had a really girly chat without Tim being here. This
:38:18. > :38:24.is normally the football section and I've made you talk about
:38:24. > :38:29.shopping. I quite like girly stuff. I quite like girly stuff. I quite
:38:29. > :38:35.like girly shopping. The only thing I'm finding now is that Flo, my
:38:35. > :38:40.girl who is 13, going out with Ali and Flo is a nightmare. Flo will
:38:40. > :38:45.see something the first shop, we'll go to all the other shops, then
:38:45. > :38:50.come back. Now, get a handful of this. Get it so it fills the palm
:38:50. > :38:54.of your hand. And thefpb what you do, with the other hand, cup it --
:38:54. > :38:59.and then what you do, with the other hand, cup into it a ball. You
:38:59. > :39:04.can be quite rough with it. We want it to hold together. The thing with
:39:04. > :39:09.the onions in this, they will give at this time moisture. We've got
:39:09. > :39:18.quite dry ingredients. You always get an inchy nose when you can't
:39:18. > :39:24.itch. Always. On that note, shall I put these there? To wrap it up, go
:39:24. > :39:31.across the middle. Be quite tight with it. If we were to wrap it up
:39:31. > :39:36.now you would end up with too much pastry and have a soggy bottom.
:39:36. > :39:40.Trim it back on both sides. Then we cut until you have a point. That
:39:40. > :39:49.means that you end one too much pastey. Don't get me wrong, I love
:39:49. > :39:57.a bit of pastry but you don't want it soggy. And we do the same thing
:39:57. > :40:02.we just did. Fold that bit back. The same on that side. It is
:40:02. > :40:05.important that we get this into a point. This is great. And then we
:40:05. > :40:10.roll it round until it is a tight ball. It is quite important thaw
:40:10. > :40:16.work it quite hard. You want it to be really lovely and round. Mine's
:40:16. > :40:25.not covering properly. That's alright. Why has mine gone dirty? I
:40:25. > :40:30.didn't rinse my hands first. This is good. It's the same as mine. Get
:40:30. > :40:36.it in your hand... We are out of time and we haven't done the
:40:36. > :40:43.aubergine bit. The aubergine bit - quickly. Loads of egg wash on that
:40:43. > :40:50.and get it into the oven. How have we managed to run out of time? We
:40:50. > :40:58.are not even half done! You cut the aubergines into slices, then strips,
:40:58. > :41:05.we fry them in plenty of oil. taking notes. They will become
:41:05. > :41:12.crispy. Once they've become crispy, we've added tomato puree cooked for
:41:12. > :41:18.7 or 8 minutes, cumin, cooked for 7 or 8 minutes. Slice the garlic.
:41:18. > :41:24.Luckily all the recipes are on the website. Cook it lowly and we end
:41:24. > :41:29.up with. This this is a delicious slow-cooked aubergine stew. This is
:41:29. > :41:34.genuinely worth doing. It is beautiful. What we end up with is
:41:34. > :41:39.our little parcel. Gorgeous. That smells delicious. All these lovely
:41:39. > :41:46.Moroccan flavours. To serve we have a spoonful of this. You can also
:41:46. > :41:53.put this sauce with other things couldn't you? This is great. On its
:41:53. > :41:58.own, or as a tapas dish, or with beef. A lovely slick item. We don't
:41:58. > :42:04.do slick. I loved the way you handled your aubergine balls there.
:42:04. > :42:09.Second to none. That BBC Prime Time programme for lour and I is just a
:42:09. > :42:16.couple of weeks away! The first thing he did when he arrived at the
:42:16. > :42:26.studio was to run to the pork. love it. For pudding we are doing a
:42:26. > :42:27.
:42:27. > :42:32.chocolate, swirly berry cake. An old-school cake. Hmm. If you fancy
:42:32. > :42:38.that, it will be on the website - bbc.co.uk/somethingfortheweekend.
:42:38. > :42:48.Alongside all of today's recipes. Or e-mail in or tweet any questions
:42:48. > :42:51.
:42:51. > :42:58.for Jon and Neil to Quite a lot of people know he was
:42:58. > :43:04.born as Morris, Joseph Mikel white. A lot of things you don't know is
:43:04. > :43:12.in this documentary about his career. It's the many faces of
:43:12. > :43:18.Michael Caine. I only told you to run the tape... Exactly.
:43:18. > :43:23.First and foremost is to work with Houston. I've always ban great
:43:23. > :43:28.admirer of his. Also of course the part is marvellous. It's a fabulous
:43:28. > :43:37.part to play. It's the type of film I wanted to be It is the type of
:43:37. > :43:42.film we should be making, instead of competing with Kojak, which
:43:42. > :43:52.people can see for nothing. You've got to make, this is what I call a
:43:52. > :43:54.
:43:54. > :44:04.movie movie. How was it, Eric? Not very good. How was it for you.
:44:04. > :44:14.Perfect all the way through. Once more, please.
:44:14. > :44:14.
:44:14. > :44:20.It was shot no good then? The mules didn't go over the side. Not a
:44:20. > :44:25.thing happens with the mules. turned around to shoot, we come in,
:44:25. > :44:29.we lev them and the camera leaves us and it looks like we are
:44:29. > :44:36.shooting them. Do you want us to come back up through them again?
:44:36. > :44:42.think so. On the other one everyone got by and turn last two. You can
:44:42. > :44:48.see the many faces of Michael Caine tonight at 707pm on BBC 2.
:44:48. > :44:58.Our next guest is described as the grumpy young man of come difficult.
:44:58. > :45:01.
:45:01. > :45:06.He's become the one of the hottest The best teacher I had was a
:45:06. > :45:10.technology teacher. What he would do, he would put a speech
:45:10. > :45:20.impediment on. Not a big one.but sometimes at the end of a sentence
:45:20. > :45:30.he would make a little noise. We would be sitting, and he would say,
:45:30. > :45:31.
:45:31. > :45:36."Don't forget Lodz, do a little dove-tail and add on some PVA
:45:36. > :45:43.glue... Hmm" It is genius for a teacher, we were listening out for
:45:43. > :45:50.it, learning stuff! As a reward, he would do a big one at Christmas,
:45:50. > :45:55."Don't forget lads, that will be on the exam... Hmm!" Welcome Jon
:45:55. > :45:59.Richardson! Do you like watching yourself?
:45:59. > :46:02.was horrible. You were sitting there squirming,
:46:02. > :46:08.but it is good. There are lots of people around,
:46:08. > :46:16.they are trained not to laugh. Some people say you are gumpy, but
:46:16. > :46:21.I think more honest, where does the reputation come from? I think of
:46:21. > :46:27.myself as grumpy. I don't like going on tour and seeing people
:46:27. > :46:31.talk about how great they eare. You want to go and have a moon! I think
:46:31. > :46:39.that. You have to think that you are not the only person that gets
:46:39. > :46:45.the hump over certain things? When you start telling people, you
:46:45. > :46:51.can see the people nodding and nudging partners, saying you do
:46:51. > :46:57.that. What gets you annoyed? Generally
:46:57. > :47:05.everything. Getting the paper. I have moved from Swindon to London.
:47:05. > :47:09.That could give you the hump! Traffic, craziness! Fashion, people
:47:09. > :47:13.wearing clothes! He is going to start.
:47:13. > :47:16.I'm feeling slightly nervous, I could say the wrong thing easily to
:47:16. > :47:21.you. You will be fine.
:47:22. > :47:26.When you are doing stand-up, you bring a lot of personal elements on
:47:26. > :47:32.r on to the stage. Do you not think you are giving too much away?
:47:32. > :47:37.Sometimes I think that I do, but that's what I enjoy. I have not don
:47:37. > :47:42.anything that exceptional in my life. I have not been in a war. So
:47:42. > :47:47.I can be honest about what I think about a girlfriend or a trip on a
:47:47. > :47:52.train. That for me, it is about someone sharing a lot and making it
:47:52. > :47:55.fun. -- funny. The whole OCD thing, being
:47:55. > :48:00.particular. That is very personalal? I do think when I was
:48:00. > :48:07.reading everything, I thought that I do so many of the same things?
:48:07. > :48:12.Are you OCD? Slightly, maybe. Are you really OCD? I generally
:48:12. > :48:17.think that everyone in the world is. You get more and more so. When you
:48:17. > :48:23.are bombarded with news. The only way to cope with reading about wars
:48:23. > :48:29.is to tidy your desk. You think you cannot fix, that but you can keep
:48:29. > :48:36.the drawers tidy. Do you enjoy it? It is one thing
:48:36. > :48:42.for comedians, they do a lot on tour, it is such a lot of work?
:48:42. > :48:51.is, but it is not so bad. You have to remember the jokes, all
:48:51. > :48:56.of that must be hard? Once you get the first laugh, you are OK.
:48:56. > :49:04.How-do you keep it fresh? I talk to the audiences each night, I try to
:49:04. > :49:12.talk about something that happened that day.
:49:13. > :49:18.You have written a book, it is called its its -- its its! Is that
:49:18. > :49:20.basically what you look for in a woman? There is -- It's Not Me Its
:49:20. > :49:24.You Impossible Perfectionist Seeks Very, Very Tidy Woman, is that
:49:24. > :49:31.basically what you look for in a woman? Well, I think I need someone
:49:31. > :49:35.as tidy and as freaky as me, but there could be some awkward moments,
:49:36. > :49:40.but equally I could not live with someone who is filthy.
:49:40. > :49:48.If you meet your ideal woman, all of this will have to change, you
:49:48. > :49:53.will have to settle down, family? know, but people think I'm
:49:53. > :49:55.maintaining misery in my life so I have something to talk about, but
:49:55. > :50:00.some day I will hopefully settle down.
:50:00. > :50:05.What is it about the business kit? Well, there is a certain way to eat
:50:05. > :50:09.a business kit. Can you show us, see, I'll do
:50:09. > :50:12.anything to eat a business kit. Show us.
:50:12. > :50:21.What's the best way to eat a business kit? It is very important
:50:21. > :50:31.a thing to know on a Sunday morning. Most normal people split the
:50:31. > :50:31.
:50:31. > :50:37.middle? You are shaking you head, why wouldn't you split the middle?
:50:37. > :50:43.Yeah, of course! You have gone for that bit first.
:50:43. > :50:50.You have to save the creamy bit. That is headlining.
:50:51. > :50:59.That is tedious. That is logistics, get rid of that, that is excess
:50:59. > :51:05.packaging. Then nibble around that. Horny telly huh?! You know what,
:51:05. > :51:09.that would get on my nerves if someone ate a business kit like
:51:09. > :51:14.that This is talent, I can see why you
:51:14. > :51:17.have been chosen as the new captain on 8 Out of 10 Cats! Let's have a
:51:17. > :51:20.look at you in action on the first show.
:51:20. > :51:27.You are team captain, this is your first show.
:51:27. > :51:36.It is not nice to hear that in a woman's voice, "This is your first
:51:36. > :51:40.go, isn't it sn?", I think that they will go brainy. B I think
:51:40. > :51:47.beautiful. Let's have a look and see what the
:51:47. > :51:52.audience would rather be, beautiful or brainy? It is brainy! 65%!
:51:52. > :51:56.not sure, what would you prefer, beautiful or brainy? It is one of
:51:56. > :52:01.those things that people are not honest about. People said brainy as
:52:01. > :52:07.they don't want to admit... That they are shallow.
:52:07. > :52:12.You can be beautiful and thick, I would not mind! It is a great show.
:52:13. > :52:18.You must be really pleased to be the captain? It is great. I get to
:52:18. > :52:23.do amazing jokes with Sean Locke and Jimmy Carr.
:52:23. > :52:27.Well, stick around. You are helping with us the gadgets, do you like
:52:28. > :52:35.gadgets? I buy them then file them in the cupboard.
:52:35. > :52:41.Well this could be a disaster! Lucy? We have a modern yet retro
:52:41. > :52:45.fantastic camera a Wi-Fi memory card and a Cabinet for your iPad.
:52:45. > :52:49.There you go, you don't want to file them, you want to play with
:52:49. > :52:57.emthis. The arcade one sounds great.
:52:57. > :53:02.OK, Jon will be cooking later on with Lou and Simon.
:53:02. > :53:07.There is more with Neil as well, go to the website or tweet us at: Here
:53:07. > :53:13.is what else is still to come on the show.
:53:13. > :53:18.Luther is hoping to get lucky in a motiveless crime.
:53:18. > :53:25.I never felt like tagging. Simon's final food is crab risotto
:53:26. > :53:33.cakes with broad bean puree. And plfplt T looks at more of the
:53:33. > :53:37.world's crazyest fools. He can't even stand up! -- Mr T.
:53:37. > :53:44.All of that still to come, now, Neil is joining us in the kitchen
:53:44. > :53:48.for more cooking. Your cooking is pretty good, isn't it? Well, I cook
:53:48. > :53:53.a lot. I've not killed anyone yet. Would you be cooking Sunday lunch?
:53:53. > :53:57.Yes, most times. This is the time I'm up in the market finding out
:53:58. > :54:07.what is fresh there. That is one of your favourite
:54:08. > :54:11.
:54:11. > :54:16.things to hear, fresh ingredients? Yes, you are one of these people
:54:16. > :54:22.that people may think don't cook, because of the whole Men Behaving
:54:22. > :54:29.Badly and drinking lager? Yes, but I never was lager drinker.
:54:29. > :54:35.Let's get this started! Well, this is a very 70s in feel. In texture.
:54:35. > :54:39.It is kind of shop bought. This does this, it has a cloying
:54:39. > :54:45.This does this, it has a cloying nature, but it is a very tasty cake.
:54:45. > :54:51.So, what we have is a lot of fruit. This is what lifts the cake. It is
:54:52. > :54:56.great time for the berries. We have raps better is,
:54:57. > :55:04.strawberries and blueberry. We have vanilla, flour, Coke powder and
:55:04. > :55:10.pink food colouring. So, Neil, tip that up and get
:55:10. > :55:15.whisking. Is that the button? That is the
:55:15. > :55:21.fella! Fun. Aisle atry not to get it over me shirt.
:55:21. > :55:25.We have been talking about beer- making, which is your primary love
:55:25. > :55:31.these days? A few people have been asking, what are you doing with the
:55:31. > :55:34.beer? The beers are going. You can get it from a big supermarket, it
:55:34. > :55:40.is in about 1,000 pubs around the country.
:55:40. > :55:47.How is that? Keep going. What is in it? Vanilla. You can
:55:47. > :55:53.smell it. It is a spice, but it goes great in the sweet things.
:55:53. > :56:01.You should put vanilla essence in the warm oven and it smells like
:56:01. > :56:07.freshly baked bread. So, then what we do is sift in the
:56:07. > :56:11.flour into there. Then fold that in with the spatula.
:56:11. > :56:14.No worries. If you have questions for Neil let
:56:14. > :56:17.us know. Tweet us or get on to the website.
:56:17. > :56:24.We are happy to ask any question you like.
:56:24. > :56:30.Whetherever you like! I did a show last year, I was tauring, --
:56:30. > :56:34.touring, I allowed the audience to ask me anything they wanted, boy,
:56:34. > :56:41.did they. It was called Celebrity Stripped.
:56:41. > :56:48.Someone was asking me about what kind of underwear I had on. Really,
:56:48. > :56:54.what was his name? She was keen to point out, she gave me choices, do
:56:54. > :57:01.I wear boxer shorts or a pouch or a thong. Really? Before I was able to
:57:01. > :57:06.answer, she shouted, "Because I don't wear any" Was she Welsh?
:57:06. > :57:10.she was a Scouser! I'm not surprised. We like to get in there
:57:10. > :57:16.and be friendly! So, you are folding that through. What you are
:57:16. > :57:20.doing there, it is tricky, but it is slippy. It is working it until
:57:20. > :57:25.it comes together. With out breaking up the air.
:57:25. > :57:29.You will lose a little bit, but as a result of this, it will be a
:57:29. > :57:34.light, springy cake. We are not using the yokes it is just the
:57:34. > :57:37.whites that are in there. Wow! Now, put a third in there, a
:57:37. > :57:42.third in there and leave a third in your bowl.
:57:42. > :57:45.Have you done this before? Brand new, never done anything like this
:57:45. > :57:50.before. Do you enjoy this kind of a
:57:50. > :57:53.challenge? I love it. I love doing this, sitting with a book, then
:57:53. > :58:03.doing something new and being taught.
:58:03. > :58:17.
:58:17. > :58:21.Now, put the Coke powder in one... -- cocoa powder in one... Then the
:58:21. > :58:26.pink colours in there and the other stays plain. So we have the three
:58:26. > :58:34.colours going on there. You don't want to mess with it, do
:58:34. > :58:36.you want it marbled? Well, that one we want as a solid colour. The
:58:36. > :58:42.marbling will happen when we put it all together. The colour is
:58:42. > :58:46.important in this. It could be that whilst it bleeds, you could puree
:58:46. > :58:51.the raps berries. That is lovely.
:58:52. > :58:58.Neil, you are the cook in the house, you like cooking, what are you
:58:58. > :59:02.going to do on tour? What I do on tour, I'm in Cardiff for six weeks,
:59:02. > :59:08.Manchester for six weeks, I get a house, with a proper kitchen. That
:59:08. > :59:14.is part of my remit. I love that, diva! I would rather
:59:14. > :59:20.go out, get into the markets and cook. That is what I love. I don't
:59:20. > :59:30.go out. Basically, what we do now, Neil,
:59:30. > :59:30.
:59:30. > :59:40.all you do have -- is have a spoonful of that, that and that.
:59:40. > :59:41.
:59:41. > :59:44.Put it all in. Rather than having it layered it will be like a
:59:44. > :59:48.Neaepolitan ice-cream. It does not matter if there is more colour than
:59:48. > :59:51.the other. It is really just getting it all to
:59:51. > :59:56.be nice and simp. Lovely.
:59:56. > :00:02.You are not doing the whole Oliver! Thing, are you? You are playing
:00:02. > :00:08.Fagin in Oliver!? I play Fagin, the first 16 weeks, that is Cardiff,
:00:08. > :00:13.Manchester and Birmingham. Then Mr Brian Connolly takes over, then I
:00:13. > :00:19.go back into it in November. I do a bit of Leeds, Bristol and maybe
:00:19. > :00:22.Dublin. So I am signed up to do 30 weeks. So lots of chances to see us.
:00:22. > :00:32.It must be a different discipline to everything else you have done.
:00:32. > :00:33.
:00:33. > :00:38.The whole singing and dancing, it is, as you know, the difference
:00:38. > :00:41.between television and theatre is paramount. It is a different
:00:41. > :00:45.discipline. Basically your rehearsal period isn't necessarily
:00:45. > :00:54.to get your words right, it is to condition you to be able to do it
:00:54. > :01:00.eight time as week. It is relentless. Two-and-a-half hours of
:01:00. > :01:09.aerobics a night. A tweet here saying can someone tell Neil about
:01:09. > :01:15.the cream he's got on his lip? that there Louise! Sorry, Lou. Bang
:01:15. > :01:22.this down so it is nice and level and into the oven. Is this is
:01:22. > :01:28.called a bunt tin, it is an old- style tin, but you don't have to
:01:28. > :01:34.use one of these. It is very retro in the way that it looks. When it
:01:34. > :01:39.comes out, you can see just by dolloping it in you get the three
:01:39. > :01:47.strict colours. The cocoa depose darker and then the pink goes
:01:47. > :01:52.brighter. The egg white goes yellow. To serve this, tip this fella out.
:01:52. > :01:58.And then we all throw our keys into the bowl... Exactly. We fill the
:01:58. > :02:06.mid whole a big load of fruit. Beauty! And it's the time of year
:02:06. > :02:11.for berries as well, isn't it? and because it was such a wet April,
:02:12. > :02:18.we've got glorious British soft fruits. A dusting of icing sugar. I
:02:18. > :02:26.had better cut pieces. Jon, that's been cleaned and washed three times.
:02:26. > :02:35.But you've tuched it now. Sorry. Are awe bit weird like that?
:02:35. > :02:41.wouldn't say weird. LAUGHTER A bit of fruit. Jon, for you. He did
:02:41. > :02:48.breathe over that. Neil, that's for you. That looks amazing, Simon.
:02:48. > :02:54.is clever isn't it? See the texture, it feels like a weird shop-bought
:02:54. > :03:01.cake. It is so light, full of air, as a friend of mine would say.
:03:01. > :03:07.Gethin, you and I don't get a chance. Thank you Neil, a great job.
:03:07. > :03:12.Coming up, Simon's final dish plus we'll be tasting some of Wayne's
:03:12. > :03:16.great cocktails. I love cake. Before we have those, we are all
:03:16. > :03:22.drinking in Deja View's last chance saloon. All we need is the year of
:03:22. > :03:28.these events and this episode of these events and this episode of
:03:28. > :03:35.the classic, It Ain't Half Hot Mum. # Baggy trousers dirty shirts
:03:35. > :03:45.# Back of the head with a plastic # Oh what fun we had
:03:45. > :03:50.
:03:50. > :03:55.# But all I learnt at school was The West Ham team confounded the
:03:55. > :03:58.experts and the bookmakers with their 1 nil win. Only in this part
:03:58. > :04:08.of East London were they convinced that their team would bring back
:04:08. > :04:08.
:04:08. > :04:12.the cup for the second time in five years.
:04:12. > :04:17.# Baggy trousers # Baggy trousers #
:04:17. > :04:23.This is serious, we might get killed. Pull the plug out of the
:04:23. > :04:33.landing craft, put sugar in their petrol tank. Anything. I don't want
:04:33. > :04:41.to die! LAUGHTER I'm only a boy! That was Deja View. Lots of clues
:04:41. > :04:47.but what it was year? Come on, guys. I was guessing it was 1985.
:04:47. > :04:52.miles out. I'm pretty confident it was 1981. I was just leaving
:04:52. > :04:57.primary school. I said 1987. I was miles out. We shall find out later.
:04:57. > :05:01.Now it is cocktail time. Wayne, what are we doing? I've been
:05:01. > :05:07.looking forward to this. I gauch on a Sunday and think -- I watch this
:05:07. > :05:15.on a Sunday and am so jealous that you were drinking cocktails at this
:05:15. > :05:19.time of the morning. Was it is Wimbledon time, we always do
:05:19. > :05:29.strawberries and cream, something like this, but this is different.
:05:29. > :05:35.
:05:35. > :05:41.bruising a piece of basil. They enjoy champagne and cocktails at
:05:41. > :05:50.SW19. I think it is 200,000 glasses of Pimm's and cocktails last year.
:05:50. > :05:56.Like a fruit cup, this is what it is based on. Sunshine and a summery
:05:56. > :06:02.cocktail, it just finishes the day off. Or starts the day. They drink
:06:02. > :06:08.gallons of champagne. Three nice measures of cognac. We don't muck
:06:08. > :06:14.about on this show - three measures! Strawberry liqueur. This
:06:14. > :06:20.is so simple this, drink. Do you have to be careful with the measure
:06:20. > :06:27.insist I've gone for... This will serve four people. Three measures
:06:27. > :06:32.of cognac and strawberry liqueur. Lemon juice, a shot of sugar syrup.
:06:32. > :06:37.It is just sugar and water. You could use normal sugar. Stir it to
:06:37. > :06:42.bring together the flavour of the basil and the strawberries, which
:06:42. > :06:49.is such a brilliant combination. There's my ingredients. Top it with
:06:49. > :06:59.lemonade. You could use champagne if you really wanted to make it...
:06:59. > :06:59.
:06:59. > :07:06.Potent. Or adventurous. Is this a take on a summery barbecue?
:07:06. > :07:11.showing how simple it is. It is based on a fruit cup. It is simple
:07:11. > :07:15.to make. A combination of spirits, liqueur. That's the thing about a
:07:15. > :07:21.cocktail. There's a lot of faff, I'm not going to bother. But it is
:07:21. > :07:26.so worth it. Can I try this? Gethin's not hanging around. I was
:07:26. > :07:32.going to give you that one. I've seen how much you've put in there.
:07:32. > :07:37.I won't be able to do the rest of the show! Sometimes I spill it.
:07:37. > :07:43.is so simple but really delicious. Neil is dying to come in and have a
:07:44. > :07:51.try. We'll keep you some, honest. I'm salivating here. Can I keep
:07:51. > :07:56.this with me for the rest of the show? Jon wouldn't share my glass,
:07:56. > :08:01.but I know you will. That is really summer isn't it? This one will be
:08:01. > :08:07.even more fantastic. I'm so looking forward to this. This is my
:08:07. > :08:14.favourite bit of the show. turned up today to eat and drink.
:08:14. > :08:22.Irks I'm late and hungry, all my family have gone away. I need food.
:08:22. > :08:29.There is half a gal lon of tequila! Elderflower cordial, a double
:08:29. > :08:35.measure of gin and apple juice. This is called a gin garden. It's
:08:35. > :08:45.the summery fragrance of the cucumber. That's more Top Gun,
:08:45. > :08:46.
:08:46. > :08:53.that's what I wanted to see. Do you want the elbow? APPLAUSE Slick!
:08:53. > :08:58.learned that one in Hong Kong. Chopped cucumber, crushed down to
:08:58. > :09:08.release its flavour. It is like a melon characteristic, fragrant,
:09:08. > :09:14.really fresh. A double measure of gin, a shot of apple juice and
:09:14. > :09:20.elderflower cordial. That's it, a gin garden. Seeing as you gate-
:09:20. > :09:24.crashed our cocktail bit... smells really fresh. It want the
:09:24. > :09:29.fresh cucumber character. That's fantastic. If you are not a gin
:09:29. > :09:35.drinker it wouldn't put you off. It is disguysed. Wonderfully put
:09:35. > :09:41.together, as all good cocktails should be - it is well balanced.
:09:41. > :09:47.That's just easy isn't it? Have a slug of that? You can crack on for
:09:47. > :09:50.a while. If you want to make the elderflower or SW19 cocktails go,
:09:50. > :10:00.to our website - bbc.co.uk/somethingfortheweekend. I
:10:00. > :10:10.bbc.co.uk/somethingfortheweekend. I recommend you get on. This is the
:10:10. > :10:10.
:10:10. > :10:16.one and only Luther. What have we got? There are one or
:10:16. > :10:25.two psychos on the estate, namely one Ryan hay field. Do we like him?
:10:25. > :10:29.He is unemployed, long history of mental illness, a history of right-
:10:29. > :10:39.wing groups,s with his mum. definitely not. Eliminate him. What
:10:39. > :10:43.have you stkpwhot I checked the local gang insignia. Any joy?
:10:43. > :10:50.Completely joyless. I never felt like tagging to me. Why put it on a
:10:50. > :10:56.roof, where no-one can see it. don't think it is a compass? I
:10:56. > :11:03.looked at a lot of fantasy fiction and I think it is the bedlam axis.
:11:03. > :11:10.What's the bedlam axis when it is at home? It is used a lot like the
:11:10. > :11:14.RPG in role-playing games. The aerogoes upwards indicates
:11:14. > :11:19.predictability and law and order, the air other going across
:11:19. > :11:29.indicates unpredictability, chaos. Let me see the CCTV footage of him
:11:29. > :11:32.
:11:32. > :11:42.kneeling down. I think he is tying up his shoelace. I think he is -- I
:11:42. > :11:47.
:11:47. > :11:52.You can dice with the penultimate Luther on Tuesday at 9.00pm on BBC
:11:52. > :11:57.One and BBC 13HD if you want it a little bit scarier. Now it's time
:11:57. > :12:04.to look at some things for the weekend with our gadget expert
:12:04. > :12:14.Lucie. Lovely to meet you. And to meet you. It hasn't been hugely
:12:14. > :12:14.
:12:14. > :12:21.exciting this weekend but ark os have released a tablet operating is.
:12:21. > :12:27.Son tick hedgehog is 20 years old - - sonic the hedgehog is 20 years
:12:27. > :12:33.old. And galaxy have a new tablet. What have you got for us today?
:12:33. > :12:39.First of all let's start with the Fuji film X100. This is where you
:12:39. > :12:44.come in, Jon. That's not cutting edge, that, is it? That's what
:12:44. > :12:49.people think. It has retro styling but it is packed with the latest
:12:49. > :12:55.high-end up to date digital technology. You can control
:12:55. > :13:00.exposure. Shutter speed, the ISO, the image sensitivity to light.
:13:00. > :13:10.Have a feel and tell me what you think. I'm always happy to have a
:13:10. > :13:12.
:13:12. > :13:19.feel. Take a picture. Say cheese. Why would you want a camera that
:13:19. > :13:25.looked naff but wasn't? It is not naff. It is quite technical? It's
:13:25. > :13:35.got a lot of manual operation, the compensation shutter speed. You've
:13:35. > :13:36.
:13:36. > :13:42.got control over the shots. If you want to underexpose, overexpose.
:13:42. > :13:47.zoom? No zoom. If there's a fat kid falling off a swing, can I really
:13:47. > :13:53.get there? No, you have to run up and take the picture. I'm not going
:13:53. > :14:00.to listen to what you are saying. How much is this? �1,000. �1,000
:14:00. > :14:06.and no zoom! Can you respray it? are not convinced on that one. Now
:14:06. > :14:11.the second one. What we've got here is the Eye-Fi. The memory card is
:14:11. > :14:17.for your camera which turns any camera into a wireless device. You
:14:17. > :14:25.can take a snap and send it to your PC. I'm already on there! That's
:14:25. > :14:29.the photo you've taken. The blue steel. It looks like I've done
:14:29. > :14:35.something wrong. When you are transferring the picture but need
:14:35. > :14:42.to keep the PC on. This will be good for your tour. Iee see a lot,
:14:42. > :14:48.driving to gigs, sometimesly see a bird and thing would be nais but I
:14:48. > :14:54.go to Burger King and I forget. don't need your laptop with you at
:14:54. > :14:58.all times. If off it will send your photos the Eye-Fi serve err. Next
:14:58. > :15:08.time you turn your lap on the on it will transfer them to your laptop.
:15:08. > :15:09.
:15:09. > :15:19.What's the cost of this one? for the 4 gigabit model. And if
:15:19. > :15:22.
:15:22. > :15:27.last gadgets. You might like this There is an iPad in there! Yes, pop
:15:28. > :15:35.it in the top. You are free eit play games, but not every game.
:15:35. > :15:40.This is more of an Ataari fit. Have a go.
:15:40. > :15:45.Look at the hurdles! It is sturdy if you want to do quick button
:15:45. > :15:51.bashing. I think I have broken it! It is odd,
:15:51. > :15:58.it is taking this theme that is modern and cool What I love about
:15:58. > :16:03.this, it started off as an April Fool's joke. The company behind it
:16:03. > :16:08.then decided to manufacture it and sell it. It will set you back �100.
:16:08. > :16:13.So this is really just a bit of fun, really? It is loads of fun, Jon,
:16:13. > :16:19.how much fun is this? You can tell, I have ignored you for the last
:16:19. > :16:28.three minutes. With this, you get access to 100
:16:29. > :16:34.titles, that are snonmousz with old-school gaming.
:16:34. > :16:41.-- synonymous. I could easily play with that. That
:16:41. > :16:44.is cool. The camera is obviously very cool. It is not a bad
:16:44. > :16:49.composition. There is a lot of manual control.
:16:49. > :16:53.You have to know what you are doing. Lueszy, thank you for your time.
:16:53. > :17:00.Brilliant stuff. You can get more information, e-
:17:00. > :17:06.mail us at: Now, then, Mr T does not mince his words when it comes
:17:06. > :17:10.to fools. There are loads in this show, this is The World's Crazyest
:17:10. > :17:16.Fools. If you like to drink, sometimes it
:17:16. > :17:22.is hard to know when to stop. The correct answer is about ten before
:17:22. > :17:26.any of these guiltys. Take a look at. This
:17:26. > :17:31.-- guys. This lady has been pulled over for
:17:31. > :17:36.erattic driving, the police officer let's her off with a caution.
:17:36. > :17:46.Caution?! You think that she deserve as caution, you ain't seen
:17:46. > :17:58.
:17:58. > :18:02.what she is capable of. Take a look Danger! Danger! What a fool! Look
:18:02. > :18:12.at this drunk fool. He's been arrested and brought to the police
:18:12. > :18:19.
:18:19. > :18:23.station for questioning. Guess what? It's another loser been
:18:23. > :18:27.driving drunk. Let's see if he can walk a straight line.
:18:27. > :18:33.Hold on to the tape for me real tight. Set it on the ground in
:18:33. > :18:37.front of you. Oh! Wow! He can't even stand up!
:18:37. > :18:47.You know you're drunk when the ground walks up to you and punches
:18:47. > :18:49.
:18:49. > :18:56.you in the face! You are all safe, I'm not going to tell my Mr T joke
:18:56. > :19:02.again. I've worn it out! Do it! you can watch more of that on
:19:02. > :19:09.Monday at 10.30pm on BBC Three. Now, Jon Richardson is in the kitchen
:19:09. > :19:13.with us. How are you? I'm OK, but I felt I was rubbish at that, all of
:19:14. > :19:19.the games and the camera. I like this, the flour.
:19:19. > :19:23.As a former chef? A A current chef, I should say.
:19:23. > :19:30.Well, I think that I'm better at the comedy.
:19:30. > :19:34.But the ambition to have a bistro? I have the ambition to get a little
:19:34. > :19:39.place, so I can get drunk with the dog.
:19:39. > :19:43.The thing is that the Lake District is the place to do it. That area
:19:43. > :19:49.has the most diverse agriculture in Western Europe, just so you know.
:19:49. > :19:54.It is obviously why I have done it! Not just to have a beer up in the
:19:55. > :19:59.mountains! Of course it is a fact! What we are going to do is crab
:19:59. > :20:04.risotto cakes with broad bean puree. We are making it with broad beans
:20:04. > :20:11.and that is lemon, thyme, garlic, beautiful broad beans and olive oil.
:20:11. > :20:16.For the risotto cakes we have crab meat, white and dark so you get
:20:16. > :20:22.lots of flavour. Siems with the white meat you are -- sometimes
:20:23. > :20:29.with the white meat you are semping for the flavour.
:20:29. > :20:34.for the flavour. -- searching. Then we have the rice,
:20:34. > :20:38.the lime and tarragon. Jon if you want to start, have a
:20:38. > :20:42.chop of that and that. Just get on with the chopping,
:20:42. > :20:47.basically. For the risotto, what we are going
:20:47. > :20:52.to do, the baufbg rules for a risotto. First off, melt a little
:20:52. > :20:57.bit of butter in the pan. If you are using onions cook them
:20:57. > :21:00.off at this point. Once the butter has melted and it
:21:00. > :21:04.begins to foam, we chuck in the rice like that.
:21:04. > :21:08.Make sure that all of the grains of rice are coated with the butter or
:21:08. > :21:18.the oil if you are using that, it does not have to be butter. Once
:21:18. > :21:22.that happens, quickly, the rice becomes pale. What we are looking
:21:22. > :21:31.for is the husk of the rice to crack.
:21:31. > :21:37.Risotto is a timely thing if you get it wrong? Yes. Do you do
:21:37. > :21:43.risotto? I do, but they are a bit filling. It takes about four hours
:21:43. > :21:50.to make it, then I eat a spoonful. Here, you can see the edge much the
:21:50. > :21:57.rice is becoming trance Lucent. Let's assume that has happened.
:21:57. > :22:01.Then what you do is add a ladel full of warm stock. That is the key
:22:01. > :22:08.if you add cold stock you slow down the cooking process.
:22:08. > :22:12.When at that is absorbed, get in another spoonful.
:22:12. > :22:15.Look at that chopping. That's proper chopping.
:22:15. > :22:20.Yeah. All of that now goes in there.
:22:20. > :22:30.Before you add the stock, a little bit of white wine, but that is not
:22:30. > :22:31.
:22:31. > :22:37.eshen shall. -- eshen shall. Then we add lime zest -- essential.
:22:37. > :22:44.Then we keep cooking that out, keep adding the stock until it becomes
:22:44. > :22:54.nice and soft and beautiful. OK, that is now the hard work done, Lou.
:22:54. > :22:55.
:22:55. > :23:00.OK, I can ask you a fou tweets. A tweet from John what was the
:23:00. > :23:06.weirdest thing you have been in, I think you were in a documentary?
:23:06. > :23:11.did a pilot series on BBC Three about people's weird habits. One
:23:11. > :23:14.woman had a compulsion, she had to squeeze a spot whenever eshe saw
:23:15. > :23:20.them. That can't have been a good day for
:23:20. > :23:26.you? I didn't have to meet her. She was a safe distance away, but there
:23:26. > :23:31.was unone that I really liked, she used to practise to pack a week
:23:31. > :23:35.before going on holiday. A week before she went away, she would
:23:35. > :23:39.practise pack so she knew it would all fit in the suitcase.
:23:39. > :23:43.I like the order. I like that people who think logically about
:23:43. > :23:50.what needs to be done and when and how. Any way.
:23:50. > :23:54.Do you think as a comedian you have to do more than being a storyteller,
:23:55. > :24:01.or doing the gags, your opinions are out there so much more? There
:24:01. > :24:07.is so much more exposure. People have to know why they are coming to
:24:07. > :24:14.see you. I am not just funny. I like to be the professional weirdo.
:24:14. > :24:21.Do you still get nervous? Yes e, I It is respect for the job.
:24:21. > :24:27.If you are not nervous, you have lost the respect.
:24:27. > :24:32.And you are on your own, you don't have the band, the dancers? It is
:24:32. > :24:37.all yours? Yes. Now, we have to make these into
:24:37. > :24:44.balls, and then put them in the egg, the flour and the breadcrumbs.
:24:44. > :24:49.There is a problem with comedy, you could become overexposed. If you
:24:49. > :24:54.are doing the same material, everyone knows that straight away?
:24:54. > :24:58.It is an interesting change. People used to be in a comedian set, you
:24:58. > :25:02.would get your shore and tour it, now there is Michael McIntyre's
:25:02. > :25:07.Comedy Roadshow, you burn material quickly. It is a different
:25:07. > :25:13.challenge now keeping it going. You have a different audience now
:25:13. > :25:18.with 8 Out of 10 Cats, people like to watch TV, they are more a cost
:25:18. > :25:25.omed to that, they may not have been to stand-up shows normally?Ow
:25:25. > :25:31.Have to get people to encourage them to watch comedy live.
:25:31. > :25:34.The BBC's coverage of Glastonbury is uej, but there is not a lot for
:25:35. > :25:39.the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. -- huge.
:25:39. > :25:45.That is where they start? It is amazing, but if you love comedy
:25:45. > :25:49.theatre, there is not a bar, cafe that has not got something in it to
:25:49. > :25:54.watch for free. There are guys going up there for the first time
:25:54. > :25:59.it is an amazing atmosphere. Now we have those, we have the
:26:00. > :26:05.flour, egg, the breadcrumbs. All we are doing is making these warm.
:26:05. > :26:10.We have getting these on a gentle cook.
:26:10. > :26:20.For our point of view we are going to get them nice and crispy.
:26:20. > :26:26.Now, for the beans. We need the broad beans in the food processor
:26:26. > :26:32.with the garlic and the thyme and probably a third of the oil i oil.
:26:32. > :26:37.This is -- olive oil. This is a really lovely summery dip. As it is
:26:37. > :26:40.broad bean season it is a great thing to do with it.
:26:40. > :26:45.Because they are slightly bitter, the baud beans, that is what is
:26:45. > :26:50.nice about them. -- broad beans. That is what is
:26:50. > :26:55.nice about. This you want this to be quite spiky. There is lots of
:26:55. > :27:01.sweetness in the risotto. This will balance that add about a third of
:27:01. > :27:09.the olive oil. The thyme is in and basically whizz that up until we
:27:09. > :27:13.get it into a puree. Notice how we step back? Then give
:27:13. > :27:21.it a quick stir. A little dash of olive oil.
:27:21. > :27:26.It is nice to make your own dips. Yes, and it is dead fresh.
:27:26. > :27:31.Another quick whizz. These fellas are just about there. We are
:27:31. > :27:35.starting to cook these, really. I am going to develop a food
:27:35. > :27:40.processor that shakes itself, that is where I will make my millions.
:27:40. > :27:46.Right, so, what we do to serve this is put a little bit of rocket on
:27:46. > :27:50.the plate. How is that. Yeah, let's use this one! So, we have a little
:27:50. > :27:54.bit of our broad bean puree like that. It is purely to do with the
:27:54. > :28:01.timing. You have to whip it together, whip it together. A
:28:01. > :28:06.little more olive oil on the top. Then we add one of these lovely
:28:06. > :28:11.little crab risotto cakes and we are there, Lou, we are there! While
:28:11. > :28:15.Simon plates that up, let's go over Simon plates that up, let's go over
:28:15. > :28:24.to Gethin and Neil. Let's get the results of Deja Vu.
:28:25. > :28:30.It was madness, Baggy Trousers and they were all from which year, Neil
:28:30. > :28:35.has the answer. I did guess this right.
:28:35. > :28:38.Did you? Yes, it was the year that I started drama school, so I
:28:39. > :28:45.remember that. 1980.
:28:45. > :28:54.I am shocked to find out that It Ain't Half Hot Mum was still on
:28:54. > :29:02.then in the 80s. A brilliant show. So, the food, Gethin you have the
:29:02. > :29:07.lovely belly pork salad, Neil and Lou have the choc berry swirl cake
:29:07. > :29:11.and we ehave the crab risotto cakes with broad bean puree.
:29:11. > :29:20.You are right about the bitterness of the broad beans, but my senior
:29:20. > :29:23.makes something similar, she puts peas in it. Add parmesan and
:29:23. > :29:32.pecorino, it is gorgeous. Thank you everyone for the texts
:29:32. > :29:38.and the e-mails. A couple of e- mails for Jon, any plans to bring
:29:38. > :29:48.back the sexy voice on the radio? Yes, I loved that.
:29:48. > :29:59.
:29:59. > :30:08.so far away in Dorset, but I did visit him recently which is always
:30:08. > :30:12.a mix of wife quake! We just revert back to 20 years. It was Martin
:30:12. > :30:19.that suggested me for the Men Behaving Badly role in the first
:30:19. > :30:27.place. We used to drink together. In two words, who do you admire on
:30:27. > :30:37.the economic circuit? If I say Sean Locke that is weird. Daniel Kitson.
:30:37. > :30:43.