0:00:02 > 0:00:03Christmas. We love this time of year.
0:00:03 > 0:00:08Yeah, wrapping presents, decorating the tree and generally making merry.
0:00:08 > 0:00:12And nothing beats a bit of Christmas home cooking
0:00:12 > 0:00:14shared with family and friends.
0:00:14 > 0:00:18Delicious festive food for all occasions, packed with flavour
0:00:18 > 0:00:21- and full of love. - Ding-dong merrily on high.
0:00:21 > 0:00:24And we'll be joined by some familiar faces
0:00:24 > 0:00:27to get us all into the festive spirit.
0:00:27 > 0:00:29That is preposterously wonderful.
0:00:29 > 0:00:31- ALL:- Merry Christmas.
0:00:31 > 0:00:34We'll also find out how to make someone's day with
0:00:34 > 0:00:37delicious home-made foodie gifts.
0:00:40 > 0:00:43So, hang up your stockings, tweak your tinsel...
0:00:43 > 0:00:46Turn on your fairy lights and relax.
0:00:46 > 0:00:48- BOTH:- We're home for Christmas!
0:01:03 > 0:01:05It's Christmas Day,
0:01:05 > 0:01:07the presents are wrapped, the house is decorated,
0:01:07 > 0:01:09and the tree is lit.
0:01:09 > 0:01:12Now, for a cook, it's the perfect time to show off.
0:01:12 > 0:01:15Everybody's looking forward to your Christmas dinner,
0:01:15 > 0:01:19so what do you do? Pull out all the stops!
0:01:21 > 0:01:24We're making porchetta pork loin
0:01:24 > 0:01:27served with sauteed chard and Parmesan.
0:01:31 > 0:01:35And a spectacular Christmas croquembouche.
0:01:37 > 0:01:40And to get us into the festive spirit,
0:01:40 > 0:01:43we'll be joined by some familiar faces.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46The Rev Kate Bottley, television's favourite vicar.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48Ohh!
0:01:48 > 0:01:52It's a singing hostess trolley!
0:01:52 > 0:01:55Denise Lewis joins us for some festive fun.
0:01:55 > 0:01:58Do you still indulge in all the pigs in blankets
0:01:58 > 0:02:01- and all the accessories?- Yes, there'll be a fight going on
0:02:01 > 0:02:03in the house if there are no pigs in blankets.
0:02:03 > 0:02:08And we're joined by Jon Culshaw, and it turns into a bit of a houseful.
0:02:08 > 0:02:11- AS TRUMP:- Welcome here to the Trump Hairy Bikers Steakhouse
0:02:11 > 0:02:13And Cake-Making Store. This is fantastic.
0:02:13 > 0:02:15You would not believe how great this cake is going to be.
0:02:15 > 0:02:17It's a great cake.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27But, first, this guest could brighten up any day,
0:02:27 > 0:02:31- Christmas or not.- BOTH:- Alex Jones! - Thank you, boys.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33Hello, and welcome, Alex. How are you?
0:02:33 > 0:02:35Very well. How are you?
0:02:35 > 0:02:37We're all right. You're looking very festive.
0:02:37 > 0:02:40- Well, I don't do Christmas by half. - No, you don't!- No, you don't!
0:02:40 > 0:02:42I mean, get the jumpers out, I love sparkle.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44- Do you love Christmas?- I do, I do.
0:02:44 > 0:02:47But it starts for me in about end of October.
0:02:47 > 0:02:49I mean, my husband finds it all a bit too much.
0:02:49 > 0:02:53- Yes.- Yes.- So, are you an early Christmas present shopper?
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Oh, no. No, last minute, but I'm early on the sherry!
0:02:56 > 0:02:58THEY LAUGH
0:02:58 > 0:03:01You're early on the Christmas spirit.
0:03:01 > 0:03:02On the Christmas spirit.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04Organisation - not so much.
0:03:04 > 0:03:06Your family, do you ever have Stilton at Christmas?
0:03:06 > 0:03:08We do, we love a bit of Stilton.
0:03:08 > 0:03:10- Yes, tick.- Tick.
0:03:10 > 0:03:12- Figs?- Figs, love figs.
0:03:12 > 0:03:14- Tick.- Oh, we're doing well.
0:03:14 > 0:03:16We're going to be doing figs that are stuffed with Stilton,
0:03:16 > 0:03:18wrapped in Parma ham
0:03:18 > 0:03:21and roasted with thyme and honey and served with...
0:03:21 > 0:03:25With a fabulous apple and beetroot salsa.
0:03:25 > 0:03:27It's all mixed in, it's going to be fab.
0:03:27 > 0:03:31First off, I've got to just take the top off my figs.
0:03:31 > 0:03:34- Give us a couple to take off for you.- Oh, these are so ripe.
0:03:34 > 0:03:38We take them and we put a cross in them, like so.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40- It's quite far down, isn't it?- Yeah.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42Then you squeeze it from the bottom.
0:03:42 > 0:03:45You see, it just opens up, just like a blossom.
0:03:45 > 0:03:47Look at this, they're like orchids.
0:03:48 > 0:03:51I mean, Alex, this has been a massive year for you
0:03:51 > 0:03:52and, obviously, having the baby,
0:03:52 > 0:03:55this is your first Christmas with your new family.
0:03:55 > 0:03:57It is and I suppose when I, you know,
0:03:57 > 0:04:01imagined having children, I'd always imagined it at Christmas time
0:04:01 > 0:04:05and the idea for me of having a family was always the one thing
0:04:05 > 0:04:08I always wanted, so we are just thrilled that this is going to be
0:04:08 > 0:04:11- the first year with little Ted. - What is Christmas like for you?
0:04:11 > 0:04:15Well, Charlie's from New Zealand, so he's been living in the UK for about
0:04:15 > 0:04:2018 years and every year so far, he's been with myself and my parents,
0:04:20 > 0:04:22because I'm a bit of a child when it comes to Christmas -
0:04:22 > 0:04:25I can't bear the thought of being away from my own parents.
0:04:25 > 0:04:28It's very childish, and I appreciate that,
0:04:28 > 0:04:30but it's just the one time of year I like going home.
0:04:30 > 0:04:32I like everything to be the same
0:04:32 > 0:04:36as it has been since I was a little girl, and he's just got to fit in.
0:04:36 > 0:04:40- Poor bloke!- Basically! But when we go home to Mum and Dad's
0:04:40 > 0:04:43house at Christmas, he is not allowed in the kitchen.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Mum and Dad, they've got their routine, you know,
0:04:45 > 0:04:48they move around each other in the kitchen like a dance
0:04:48 > 0:04:52- and you just have to leave them to it.- It's lovely, that, isn't it,
0:04:52 > 0:04:53when the gang's in the kitchen
0:04:53 > 0:04:56and it's all choreographed cos they've done it for so long.
0:04:56 > 0:04:59- Completely.- It was like my mum at Christmas -
0:04:59 > 0:05:03she was in charge of the kitchen and everybody worked to Mam, and she was
0:05:03 > 0:05:06brilliant and I don't think anybody does Christmas like the UK.
0:05:06 > 0:05:10- Oh, I mean...- They don't, do they? - ..my husband keeps saying,
0:05:10 > 0:05:14"Right, we are going to New Zealand for Christmas" -
0:05:14 > 0:05:17and we are this year - however... Who wants a hot Christmas?
0:05:17 > 0:05:21Nobody. I mean, I don't even like it when it's mild here.
0:05:21 > 0:05:24- Who wants mild weather? - No, I hate it!- Get the snow out.
0:05:24 > 0:05:28You see, my thinking behind this is Teddy won't remember this one.
0:05:28 > 0:05:29By the time he does,
0:05:29 > 0:05:32we'll be back in Mum and Dad's house in West Wales!
0:05:32 > 0:05:33THEY LAUGH
0:05:33 > 0:05:35Right, shall we stuff the figs?
0:05:35 > 0:05:38- Yes, why not?- So, we've mashed this to a point of oblivion
0:05:38 > 0:05:41and what we do is you take the fig, I'll take this over here.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43- I'll just tidy up a bit. - Thank you.- We're tidying.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46And you just take a little ball of the Stilton
0:05:46 > 0:05:48and push it into that blossoming fig.
0:05:48 > 0:05:51Now, we are going to cook these so it's all going to melt and it's
0:05:51 > 0:05:54going to mix in. You know, like, the sour Stilton
0:05:54 > 0:05:57- is going to mix with the sweet fig. It's going to be fabulous.- It is.
0:05:57 > 0:06:01So, would you have this as a starter or would you have this as,
0:06:01 > 0:06:05you know, something like a canape in a drinks party?
0:06:05 > 0:06:07I'd have it in front of the telly!
0:06:07 > 0:06:08THEY LAUGH
0:06:08 > 0:06:10Watching The Great Escape!
0:06:10 > 0:06:12It would be a starter, I think,
0:06:12 > 0:06:15- because it's quite a substantial thing.- It's quite rich, isn't it?
0:06:17 > 0:06:19I'm going to wrap these in the Parma ham.
0:06:19 > 0:06:21Any kind of air-dried ham would do.
0:06:21 > 0:06:24Serrano, presunto.
0:06:24 > 0:06:25Take it like so.
0:06:25 > 0:06:29And just about two-thirds of the way up,
0:06:29 > 0:06:32just wrap it, caress it, put it in its little blanket.
0:06:32 > 0:06:35It's like Jesus in his swaddling bands in the manger.
0:06:35 > 0:06:39- Made from ham.- Will that stay like that, then?
0:06:39 > 0:06:41- Yeah, yeah.- All that will happen is
0:06:41 > 0:06:43the ham will tighten around as it cooks.
0:06:43 > 0:06:45It will tighten around the fig
0:06:45 > 0:06:48and then you get the crispy edges to it. It's so nice.
0:06:48 > 0:06:51It's like how your jeans go tight around you by about Boxing Day.
0:06:53 > 0:06:55I mean, Alex, if you cooked Christmas dinner,
0:06:55 > 0:06:58- what would it be like? - Terrible.- Really?
0:06:58 > 0:07:02Oh, I mean, I've never cooked a Sunday lunch,
0:07:02 > 0:07:04let alone a Christmas dinner.
0:07:04 > 0:07:08But, you see, Mum and Dad are brilliant cooks, you know?
0:07:08 > 0:07:10So, Mum does the traditional stuff,
0:07:10 > 0:07:12Dad does the more experimental stuff -
0:07:12 > 0:07:14he likes sort of curries, risottos,
0:07:14 > 0:07:16that sort of thing, and, between them,
0:07:16 > 0:07:18they're a force to be reckoned with in the kitchen.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21I just didn't get the memo. I don't know what happened to me.
0:07:21 > 0:07:24My sister is fantastic and they tried their best.
0:07:24 > 0:07:28They cooked with us when we were children, I'm married to a chef.
0:07:28 > 0:07:30I don't know what happened.
0:07:30 > 0:07:33If we had to force you to cook us Christmas dinner,
0:07:33 > 0:07:36- what would you cobble up for us? - I think I'd go traditional.
0:07:36 > 0:07:38I'd probably add a Yorkshire pudding.
0:07:38 > 0:07:40- I know it's not right. - No, I agree.
0:07:40 > 0:07:43Is there any time in life when you wouldn't want a Yorkshire pudding?
0:07:43 > 0:07:45- No.- No.- No.- No.- True.
0:07:45 > 0:07:47So I'd go Yorkshire pudding.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51What we've got now is we want some olive oil in here,
0:07:51 > 0:07:53just about a tablespoon.
0:07:56 > 0:07:57And some honey.
0:07:59 > 0:08:00- Do you want me to chop those?- Yeah,
0:08:00 > 0:08:02if you chop the thyme, that would be great.
0:08:02 > 0:08:06And that's that soft thyme, so the stalks and everything can go in.
0:08:06 > 0:08:08So, so far, we've taken the tops off the figs,
0:08:08 > 0:08:11we've cut a cross in the top and opened the fig up,
0:08:11 > 0:08:13stuffed it with mashed Stilton and wrapped it in Parma ham
0:08:13 > 0:08:16and in this bowl, I've got some honey and some oil,
0:08:16 > 0:08:19and Si's chopping some thyme.
0:08:19 > 0:08:22Everything has its place on this little simple dish
0:08:22 > 0:08:24and just drizzle the honey and oil,
0:08:24 > 0:08:27make sure every fig's got a little bit.
0:08:27 > 0:08:31You see - honey, Stilton, sweet, savoury, crispy.
0:08:31 > 0:08:34We're trying to tick those boxes, Alex.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36I think I could manage this recipe.
0:08:36 > 0:08:40- Yeah.- Yeah.- I think you do yourself a disservice.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42I think if you concentrated on stuff,
0:08:42 > 0:08:44because, as your career has shown,
0:08:44 > 0:08:46you can do anything you put your mind to.
0:08:46 > 0:08:48- Oh, thank you, Si.- Yeah, if you don't get fired!
0:08:50 > 0:08:52That was back in the day.
0:08:52 > 0:08:54I mean, you know, I started off in television as a runner, you know,
0:08:54 > 0:08:58as most people do, and worked my way up and I was hideous at it.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02I picked up Michael Crawford, you know, the first Phantom, Michael,
0:09:02 > 0:09:03you know, Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em,
0:09:03 > 0:09:08from the airport and the director-producer had said to me,
0:09:08 > 0:09:09"Now, take him for some lunch
0:09:09 > 0:09:11"because we're not quite ready for him,
0:09:11 > 0:09:14"take him for some lunch on the way to the set."
0:09:14 > 0:09:17So I took him to a McDonald's drive-through.
0:09:17 > 0:09:19You took him into a McDonald's drive-through?
0:09:19 > 0:09:22Well, I did, because I didn't have any money, Si,
0:09:22 > 0:09:25and I didn't have petty cash and so that's all I could afford.
0:09:25 > 0:09:28I mean, he hadn't had a chicken nugget for years
0:09:28 > 0:09:30and he enjoyed it.
0:09:30 > 0:09:32You know...!
0:09:32 > 0:09:34"Where are you with Michael?" "Oh, at the drive-through."
0:09:34 > 0:09:37- We'll be there now!- Oh, oh!
0:09:37 > 0:09:39- That is genius!- And was that what got you the sack?
0:09:39 > 0:09:43No, it wasn't that. I think it was probably, um...
0:09:43 > 0:09:46We were filming with an orchestra and Julian Lloyd Webber,
0:09:46 > 0:09:50who's Andrew...Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber's brother,
0:09:50 > 0:09:54was doing a big solo on the cello and he said, "Listen, Alex,
0:09:54 > 0:09:56"do you mind just watching my cello
0:09:56 > 0:09:59"because I need to take a phone call?"
0:09:59 > 0:10:01- Oh, no!- I went, "Yes, no problem."
0:10:01 > 0:10:06Anyway, I got chatting to this parking attendant,
0:10:06 > 0:10:11who was quite handsome, and, when Julian Lloyd Webber came back,
0:10:11 > 0:10:15the said cello, Stradivarius, worth millions, had disappeared.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17Oh, no!
0:10:17 > 0:10:19Oh, I felt cold.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22And so we looked everywhere for this cello - nowhere to be found.
0:10:22 > 0:10:24Luckily, somebody had seen this cello on its own
0:10:24 > 0:10:27and taken it and put it under the stage but, of course,
0:10:27 > 0:10:29this was three-quarters of an hour later.
0:10:29 > 0:10:31- I mean, the man was raging by this point.- Aw!
0:10:31 > 0:10:34- I think that was the icing on the cake.- So that's what did it.
0:10:34 > 0:10:35That's what did it, probably.
0:10:35 > 0:10:38But you have to say, Alex, that you did that in style.
0:10:38 > 0:10:41- If you're going to go down, you go down properly.- And to be fair,
0:10:41 > 0:10:44the same company who fired me then rang me a week later and said,
0:10:44 > 0:10:47"Look, you can't be a researcher or a runner any more,
0:10:47 > 0:10:50"but would you like to come in and do a screen test?"
0:10:50 > 0:10:52And then that's how I started as a presenter.
0:10:52 > 0:10:53- Well, there you go.- Right, well,
0:10:53 > 0:10:57I've got that finely-chopped thyme and we just sprinkle...
0:10:57 > 0:11:02Make sure - it is Christmas - each fig has got its fair share.
0:11:02 > 0:11:04Now, we pop that into a hot oven.
0:11:04 > 0:11:05- Hot!- Hot!
0:11:05 > 0:11:08200 degrees Celsius for 15 minutes,
0:11:08 > 0:11:11which gives my friend here just time
0:11:11 > 0:11:14to knock up his apple and beetroot salsa.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16# Uno, dos, tres
0:11:16 > 0:11:19# Cuatro, cinco, seis, uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, seis... #
0:11:19 > 0:11:22- Not that sort of salsa. - No, no, no.
0:11:22 > 0:11:24You did a fabulous salsa on Strictly, didn't you?
0:11:24 > 0:11:28It was awful! My mother, right, she was watching me on Strictly,
0:11:28 > 0:11:31week one, and she said, "Oh, Alex,
0:11:31 > 0:11:34"how long is this going to go on for? Because I enjoy this programme
0:11:34 > 0:11:37"normally and this is really putting me off - I feel stressed."
0:11:37 > 0:11:39I said, "All right, Mam,
0:11:39 > 0:11:41"don't worry, I'll be out probably week three."
0:11:41 > 0:11:43Anyway, semifinals, I was still there,
0:11:43 > 0:11:46- and it was just to annoy my mother! - Oh, gosh!
0:11:47 > 0:11:49Right, mate, could you dice me?
0:11:49 > 0:11:51- Certainly will.- Thank you.
0:11:51 > 0:11:55Onion and then we start with the beetroot.
0:11:56 > 0:12:00Now, you know the beetroot that you get in the vacuum packs - it's that,
0:12:00 > 0:12:02it's not the pickled one.
0:12:02 > 0:12:03Don't use the pickled one.
0:12:03 > 0:12:05Just boiled beetroot, isn't it?
0:12:05 > 0:12:07Exactly. Just an apple.
0:12:07 > 0:12:11I'm just going to dice that the same size as our beetroot.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15Add it to the bowl. Dave's coming over with the onion.
0:12:15 > 0:12:18It's just a lovely assembly, this, and it's really quite quick.
0:12:18 > 0:12:20Great mixture of flavours, isn't it?
0:12:20 > 0:12:22It is, it's lovely. And then we're going to take some thyme
0:12:22 > 0:12:26and some tarragon. Use the soft parts of both
0:12:26 > 0:12:29and just chop that really, really finely.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36- Would you mind chopping me some walnuts, Dave, please?- Certainly.
0:12:38 > 0:12:40- Look at the colours, aren't they lovely?- Oh, beautiful.
0:12:40 > 0:12:42It's the flavours of Christmas as well, isn't it?
0:12:42 > 0:12:44Absolutely, man, absolutely.
0:12:44 > 0:12:47And, then, what we're going to do is make, in a very large bowl,
0:12:47 > 0:12:49some cider vinegar,
0:12:49 > 0:12:55about a tablespoon, and then two tablespoons of walnut oil.
0:12:55 > 0:12:57- Oh, walnut oil.- Yes, it's lovely.
0:12:57 > 0:13:00And this is going to be our dressing. A bit of salt.
0:13:00 > 0:13:03Not too much.
0:13:03 > 0:13:04A little bit of pepper.
0:13:07 > 0:13:08Give it a mix.
0:13:11 > 0:13:16And that goes over...the salsa.
0:13:16 > 0:13:18It's kind of the Christmas colours as well, isn't it?
0:13:18 > 0:13:20It is, it's lovely.
0:13:20 > 0:13:22And we just give it a stir.
0:13:26 > 0:13:27And then put...
0:13:29 > 0:13:32..some lovely walnuts into the salsa
0:13:32 > 0:13:37and then save some to sprinkle over
0:13:37 > 0:13:40the plate as a lovely finish, and it'll look really nice.
0:13:40 > 0:13:43And the walnuts will say it's Christmas still.
0:13:43 > 0:13:45Great, I'll get the serving plate.
0:13:45 > 0:13:47- Yes.- Are we there, mate?
0:13:47 > 0:13:49- Oh, yes.- Fantastic.
0:13:49 > 0:13:50A thing of beauty, actually.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55- Oh. Not too shabby, are they? - How lovely are they?
0:13:55 > 0:13:57That liquor's going to be beautiful.
0:13:57 > 0:14:00Right, well, I think what we'll do...
0:14:02 > 0:14:04..we'll put a bit of this...
0:14:05 > 0:14:08- ..on the bottom. - It's oozy-licious, isn't it?
0:14:10 > 0:14:11It's all your super foods in there.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13It is, it is, they're all there.
0:14:15 > 0:14:18- That should be big enough, I think. - Oh, aye, yeah!
0:14:18 > 0:14:20Beautiful.
0:14:21 > 0:14:23They remind me of little jacket potatoes.
0:14:23 > 0:14:25THEY LAUGH
0:14:25 > 0:14:28- Bring it back to basic. - See, this is the best bit.
0:14:28 > 0:14:31You've got a fig, the thyme, the honey.
0:14:33 > 0:14:35Beautiful.
0:14:37 > 0:14:39A few sprinkles of walnuts.
0:14:41 > 0:14:43Alex, there you go.
0:14:44 > 0:14:47Oh, look at that!
0:14:47 > 0:14:48DAVE LAUGHS
0:14:53 > 0:14:56Yes! That is amazing!
0:14:56 > 0:14:57Oh!
0:14:57 > 0:15:00- Yes?- Taste sensation...
0:15:00 > 0:15:01- I think it's a hit.- ..right there.
0:15:01 > 0:15:03- Can we join you?- Go on.
0:15:06 > 0:15:09- Mmm!- Mmm!
0:15:09 > 0:15:12- That works well. - It does, doesn't it?- Mmm!- Mmm!
0:15:12 > 0:15:15It's sweet, it's salty, it's savoury.
0:15:15 > 0:15:16Full of flavours of Christmas.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18It's delicious. Don't mind me.
0:15:18 > 0:15:22- WHISPERING:- I think she likes it. - I think we're on a winner.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24Figs stuffed with Stilton wrapped in Parma ham
0:15:24 > 0:15:27with beetroot, walnut and apple salsa.
0:15:27 > 0:15:30A dish that oozes flavour.
0:15:44 > 0:15:47Now, Christmas is the season to spread peace and joy,
0:15:47 > 0:15:50so why not brighten up somebody's day
0:15:50 > 0:15:54with a really thoughtful gift that's made with love?
0:15:54 > 0:15:56Jo Ingleby has a great idea
0:15:56 > 0:15:59for a gift that's not only fun, but tasty, too.
0:16:01 > 0:16:05We're going to make a Christmas tree made from crackers.
0:16:05 > 0:16:08This is something a little bit unusual
0:16:08 > 0:16:10which you can either serve yourselves
0:16:10 > 0:16:13as the centre of a cheese board or a kind of tapas,
0:16:13 > 0:16:16or you can take it as a gift for friends.
0:16:16 > 0:16:18I get my kids involved in making this as well,
0:16:18 > 0:16:21because it's a really lovely, fun thing to make as a family.
0:16:21 > 0:16:22Doesn't take too long as well.
0:16:22 > 0:16:25So what I do is just get regular porridge oats
0:16:25 > 0:16:28and just whizz them really quickly in a food processor.
0:16:30 > 0:16:34And then you're adding to that some different flavours.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36This is where your creativity comes into it.
0:16:36 > 0:16:38You can add anything you like to this.
0:16:38 > 0:16:40You can make them really hot and spicy, if you want to.
0:16:40 > 0:16:44You could add a little bit of Stilton or some grated Parmesan
0:16:44 > 0:16:45to give a cheesy flavour.
0:16:47 > 0:16:50The key is rolling out the crackers really, really thin.
0:16:50 > 0:16:51So, we're talking, you know,
0:16:51 > 0:16:53probably about the thickness of a 5p piece.
0:16:56 > 0:17:00I use a variety of star-shaped cutters here.
0:17:00 > 0:17:01You can buy a set, if you want to,
0:17:01 > 0:17:05but what I did is raided my children's Play-Doh kit,
0:17:05 > 0:17:08and I also got some cookie cutters, different sized,
0:17:08 > 0:17:09borrowed some from friends.
0:17:09 > 0:17:12It really doesn't matter about being perfect here.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14Each star that you make is going to need a hole in the middle.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17There's lots of ways you can do that, but it needs to be absolutely
0:17:17 > 0:17:19in the middle, so be careful with this one.
0:17:19 > 0:17:21And you pop that straight into a hot oven,
0:17:21 > 0:17:23and it takes about ten minutes.
0:17:23 > 0:17:25Basically, they need to feel quite dry when you pick them up.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28If they still feel heavy and quite dense, then they probably need
0:17:28 > 0:17:29a little bit longer.
0:17:30 > 0:17:34So, you need a nice, long stem of rosemary.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36I'm going to strip all the leaves off,
0:17:36 > 0:17:38apart from the last little bunch at the top.
0:17:38 > 0:17:40So they're going to stick out of the top of the crackers
0:17:40 > 0:17:42like a little top of a Christmas tree.
0:17:46 > 0:17:49So, suddenly, you can see this coming together and starting to look
0:17:49 > 0:17:52like a Christmas tree. It doesn't matter that they're all different
0:17:52 > 0:17:55shapes and sizes, that's perfect. It's a little bit rustic.
0:17:55 > 0:17:57It's a bit of Christmas on your plate.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24Our brilliant guest today, well, he was expected,
0:18:24 > 0:18:27but he may have brought some unexpected guests with him -
0:18:27 > 0:18:29Jon Culshaw!
0:18:29 > 0:18:30THEY CHEER
0:18:30 > 0:18:32- Hello, nice to see you! - Merry Christmas, Jon!
0:18:32 > 0:18:35Merry Christmas to you, too. Merry Christmas to you, too.
0:18:35 > 0:18:37So do you like Christmas?
0:18:37 > 0:18:38It's a wonderful time of year.
0:18:38 > 0:18:40I always call it the time of year
0:18:40 > 0:18:42where you restore your factory settings.
0:18:42 > 0:18:44And I love to go home, shut the door,
0:18:44 > 0:18:48and for two weeks, or whatever the amount of time, just do nothing.
0:18:48 > 0:18:51- It's great.- Just do nothing.- We've got a bit of a surprise for you,
0:18:51 > 0:18:52because what we're going to do is,
0:18:52 > 0:18:54we're actually going to make a Christmas cake.
0:18:54 > 0:18:58Don't you have to make your Christmas cakes in September, Si?
0:18:58 > 0:19:00No. Not with this one, Dave.
0:19:00 > 0:19:02You see what he did there? Was good that, wasn't it?
0:19:02 > 0:19:04Not with this one, because it's a relatively quick one.
0:19:04 > 0:19:08The first thing I'm going to do is, I'm going to zest an orange,
0:19:08 > 0:19:10a lemon and a lime.
0:19:10 > 0:19:13I am going to cream together some butter...
0:19:15 > 0:19:17- ..and some sugar. - That's splendid, isn't it?
0:19:17 > 0:19:19Look at that, all that butter and sugar,
0:19:19 > 0:19:21- the greatest things in this world!- Ever.
0:19:21 > 0:19:23THEY LAUGH
0:19:24 > 0:19:27I'm getting the aroma now, that sugary, buttery aroma.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29I'm going to add four eggs.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31So what was Christmas like when you were a child, Jon?
0:19:31 > 0:19:34Oh, it was wonderful. It was just very...
0:19:34 > 0:19:36I remember the Kay's catalogue.
0:19:36 > 0:19:37- Do you remember the Kay's catalogue? - Yes!
0:19:37 > 0:19:40And you sort of sensed that there was potential here,
0:19:40 > 0:19:42you may receive some of these things at Christmas.
0:19:42 > 0:19:44It's on its way, Santa's coming!
0:19:44 > 0:19:48- Yes.- Yeah. And what do you do, what traditions do you maintain?
0:19:48 > 0:19:49I always have a tradition whereby,
0:19:49 > 0:19:52from Christmas Eve to New Year's Day,
0:19:52 > 0:19:54you're allowed to have chocolates for breakfast.
0:19:54 > 0:19:57THEY LAUGH
0:19:57 > 0:19:58That's brilliant!
0:19:58 > 0:20:01But I just love the sense of doing absolutely nothing.
0:20:01 > 0:20:07And I love that time of the day, the late afternoon, winter sunsets,
0:20:07 > 0:20:08when the stars start to come out,
0:20:08 > 0:20:11- and it's just wonderful to get out into that.- Fab.
0:20:11 > 0:20:14Now, I'm going to add our spices.
0:20:14 > 0:20:17So we have cinnamon, mace, allspice,
0:20:17 > 0:20:20nutmeg and cloves, and a little bit of cardamom.
0:20:20 > 0:20:21There we go.
0:20:21 > 0:20:23Ah, splendid.
0:20:23 > 0:20:28And then we're going to take the juice of an orange and the flour.
0:20:30 > 0:20:33And then we add some ground almonds.
0:20:33 > 0:20:36I've got the zest of my orange, my lemon and my lime.
0:20:36 > 0:20:38Looks quite nice, doesn't it?
0:20:38 > 0:20:40It's all your five a day in one glorious cake mix!
0:20:40 > 0:20:43You've got 15 in this one, Jon!
0:20:43 > 0:20:45And I've got some dried apricots.
0:20:45 > 0:20:46Currants.
0:20:48 > 0:20:49Raisins.
0:20:51 > 0:20:53And sultanas.
0:20:54 > 0:20:57The inevitable glace cherries.
0:20:57 > 0:21:00Orange and lemon candied peel.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03And now, this is something we always do in a fruitcake, dried pineapple.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07And our nut of choice for this cake is cashew nuts.
0:21:07 > 0:21:10So, we give this a stir, and then...
0:21:10 > 0:21:14Again, to continue with our... almost kind of tropical theme,
0:21:14 > 0:21:18using 100ml of white rum.
0:21:19 > 0:21:20- Oh, yes.- Yes.
0:21:21 > 0:21:24When did you start to do impressions, then, Jon?
0:21:24 > 0:21:26I think it was probably,
0:21:26 > 0:21:29a big part of it was watching Mike Yarwood's Christmas shows.
0:21:29 > 0:21:30- Yes.- Yes.
0:21:30 > 0:21:34And probably a repeat of The Sky At Night with Sir Patrick Moore,
0:21:34 > 0:21:37who I found very, very captivating, very fascinating indeed,
0:21:37 > 0:21:38speaking very, very quickly
0:21:38 > 0:21:41and one eye open slightly more than the other.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43SI AND DAVE LAUGH
0:21:43 > 0:21:46So, I think, yes, that probably teed things off as well.
0:21:46 > 0:21:47There's something about...
0:21:47 > 0:21:50There's something about what you do and how you deliver it,
0:21:50 > 0:21:54is absolutely hilarious, and it is so precise, though.
0:21:54 > 0:21:58Do you watch videos of people and then look at yourself in the mirror?
0:21:58 > 0:22:00- How does it evolve?- Yeah, it's...
0:22:00 > 0:22:02You do watch videos over and over again,
0:22:02 > 0:22:04you know, just download a clip on to the tablet
0:22:04 > 0:22:06and just watch it over and over again.
0:22:06 > 0:22:08If you listen over and over again to something...
0:22:08 > 0:22:10- Yes.- ..and you have it, like, in your mind.
0:22:10 > 0:22:13- AS OZZY:- Ozzy Osborne, I'm imagining Ozzy Osborne now, you know.
0:22:13 > 0:22:16That sort of, like, little wobble that he does,
0:22:16 > 0:22:18it just sort of puts you in a good mood, you know.
0:22:18 > 0:22:19SI AND DAVE LAUGH
0:22:19 > 0:22:21And you just see the people and get it out there.
0:22:21 > 0:22:24Is there a science to it, do you think?
0:22:24 > 0:22:26Yeah, I think there is. You're looking for the aspect
0:22:26 > 0:22:30of someone's voice or their mannerisms which are funny,
0:22:30 > 0:22:34but you want to know which bits to exaggerate, to find the humour.
0:22:34 > 0:22:37You want to look for the little nuances and foibles
0:22:37 > 0:22:40that perhaps people don't realise they've noticed,
0:22:40 > 0:22:43and then you get a lovely element of surprise with that.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45One of my favourite is Professor Brian Cox...
0:22:45 > 0:22:49- AS BRIAN COX:- ..who has this very specific delivery,
0:22:49 > 0:22:52sometimes a word at a time, like that,
0:22:52 > 0:22:54to explain the concepts.
0:22:54 > 0:22:57And our cake is very much like the laws of physics
0:22:57 > 0:22:59which bind the galaxy together.
0:22:59 > 0:23:03If the fruit over there represents the stars and the planets,
0:23:03 > 0:23:04and the planet-forming regions,
0:23:04 > 0:23:07then this represents the dark matter and dark energy
0:23:07 > 0:23:11that will bind the galaxy together, and...
0:23:11 > 0:23:13SI AND DAVE LAUGH
0:23:15 > 0:23:17It's like being with Coxy, isn't it?
0:23:17 > 0:23:19- It's bizarre! - We've got a house full!
0:23:19 > 0:23:21But it's your mannerisms as well, though,
0:23:21 > 0:23:24it just draws you straight in. It's fabulous.
0:23:24 > 0:23:26- AS TRUMP:- Well, yes, I think the greatest one of those
0:23:26 > 0:23:28is probably The Donald.
0:23:28 > 0:23:31It's probably The Donald. Welcome here to the Trump Hairy Bikers
0:23:31 > 0:23:34Steakhouse And Cake-Making Store. This is fantastic,
0:23:34 > 0:23:36you would not believe how great this cake is going to be,
0:23:36 > 0:23:39it's a great cake. It's so fantastic, it's absolutely great.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42- SI AND DAVE LAUGH - His mannerisms like that.
0:23:42 > 0:23:43Look at that. That's quite glorious.
0:23:43 > 0:23:46It is. Look at the colours.
0:23:46 > 0:23:48And now we're just going to fold it in.
0:23:48 > 0:23:52On cookery programmes they always say, "Prepare your cake tin."
0:23:52 > 0:23:55Well, we've done this, but we want to show you how.
0:23:55 > 0:23:56It's a normal cake tin.
0:23:56 > 0:23:58We've greased the bottom with some butter
0:23:58 > 0:24:02and cut a disc of baking parchment that fits the bottom of that tin.
0:24:02 > 0:24:03Oh, yeah.
0:24:03 > 0:24:06Now it needs what I liken to a chef's hat.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09And what it does is, it stops the top of the cake from burning,
0:24:09 > 0:24:12cos this cake is going to be in the oven for about three hours.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14I have to say,
0:24:14 > 0:24:16this is a heavy mix.
0:24:16 > 0:24:17There we go.
0:24:17 > 0:24:20Now, this needs to go into a preheated oven
0:24:20 > 0:24:24at 180 degrees Celsius for one hour.
0:24:24 > 0:24:28After the hour, turn it down to 150 Celsius.
0:24:29 > 0:24:30See you later.
0:24:37 > 0:24:38We've got a little something for you.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40Thank you. I'm very touched, I'm very touched.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42And thank you for coming on the show.
0:24:42 > 0:24:46I'm opening the paper very carefully so it can be re-used!
0:24:46 > 0:24:47- Are you one of those?!- Yes!
0:24:47 > 0:24:49- You are not!- I am!
0:24:49 > 0:24:51- Oh, no!- Oh, Jon, come on, man!
0:24:51 > 0:24:53Oh, ho, ho, ho!
0:24:54 > 0:24:57There we are. Now that is quite, quite magnificent.
0:24:57 > 0:25:00Christmas, of course, at the height of the astronomy season
0:25:00 > 0:25:03and through those, yes, very, very marvellous,
0:25:03 > 0:25:05we can see the Pleiades quite clearly.
0:25:05 > 0:25:08Very faint with the naked eye, but put the binoculars on them
0:25:08 > 0:25:10and you will see the richness of it, quite magnificent.
0:25:10 > 0:25:13It's well known, Jon, that you have a love of astronomy.
0:25:13 > 0:25:16- Yes.- When you're with Brian Cox on the programmes,
0:25:16 > 0:25:20do you find yourself inadvertently impersonating him?
0:25:20 > 0:25:21At times.
0:25:21 > 0:25:25- AS BRIAN COX:- I think he finds it quite fascinating to see, you know,
0:25:25 > 0:25:26the vocal patterns that we have.
0:25:26 > 0:25:29There was one time he said, "Yeah, I see you doing this with your hand.
0:25:29 > 0:25:31"I've stopped doing it now!"
0:25:31 > 0:25:33THEY LAUGH
0:25:33 > 0:25:34Of all your impressions,
0:25:34 > 0:25:37which one is it that you think brought you to fame?
0:25:37 > 0:25:40I suppose it might have been William Hague.
0:25:40 > 0:25:42That was quite notorious, yes.
0:25:42 > 0:25:46I was working with Steve Penk at the time over on Capital Radio,
0:25:46 > 0:25:49and we were talking about a new William Hague impression
0:25:49 > 0:25:52and talking, that, "Well, we might as well phone Downing Street."
0:25:52 > 0:25:55So Steve got the number of the Cabinet Office
0:25:55 > 0:25:58from directory enquiries, just like that.
0:25:58 > 0:26:02The idea of the joke was meant to be Hague would say,
0:26:02 > 0:26:05"Yes, could I, could I speak to the Prime Minister?"
0:26:05 > 0:26:08and someone would say, "No, go away, stop wasting our time."
0:26:08 > 0:26:10"Well, am I not important enough? This is an outrage!"
0:26:12 > 0:26:15But the very helpful lady said, "Yes, who is it, please?"
0:26:15 > 0:26:16"Yes, it's William Hague."
0:26:16 > 0:26:18"Just a moment, we'll go and fetch the Prime Minister."
0:26:20 > 0:26:22He appeared on the line.
0:26:22 > 0:26:24- AS BLAIR:- Hello. - HE FAKE LAUGHS AS BLAIR
0:26:24 > 0:26:28The unmistakable sort of voice, always with a grin there,
0:26:28 > 0:26:30"And I think what's important is..."
0:26:30 > 0:26:32You know, your body language stiffens
0:26:32 > 0:26:35and your face becomes a little bit like the Joker,
0:26:35 > 0:26:39and then your body language sort of takes on the form of C-3PO.
0:26:41 > 0:26:44And in the press at the time, Blair had always said, you know,
0:26:44 > 0:26:46"Let's be informal, call me Tony."
0:26:46 > 0:26:48But William Hague wouldn't go along with that.
0:26:48 > 0:26:50- AS WILLIAM HAGUE:- Rather sardonically addressed him
0:26:50 > 0:26:52as "Prime Minister".
0:26:52 > 0:26:56So when, on this call, I said, "You all right, Tony?"
0:26:56 > 0:26:58- AS BLAIR:- He knew something was up,
0:26:58 > 0:27:00but he played along good-naturedly.
0:27:00 > 0:27:04- Gosh.- It's about time we did the cake and took it out of the oven.
0:27:04 > 0:27:06- Ooh!- I think so.- Should we?
0:27:06 > 0:27:08- Yeah, come on. - I cannae wait to see that.
0:27:08 > 0:27:10- Let's have a look. It's looking in good form.- Excellent.
0:27:10 > 0:27:12It's looking in very good form from here.
0:27:12 > 0:27:13SI AND DAVE LAUGH
0:27:13 > 0:27:14- Yes. - # Ta-da! #
0:27:14 > 0:27:17- Oh, look.- The cake is in the house. - Look at that.
0:27:17 > 0:27:20Because it's Christmas, we have to make an effort, don't we?
0:27:20 > 0:27:23- We do, we do.- We do. What we've got in here is apricot jam.
0:27:23 > 0:27:25We're going to melt it down, and then...
0:27:25 > 0:27:27We're going to apply marzipan.
0:27:27 > 0:27:29Flip your cake,
0:27:29 > 0:27:31and we'll put the marzipan on that side.
0:27:31 > 0:27:35Flat surface. This is our apricot jam, nice and liquid.
0:27:35 > 0:27:39And this is the glue that's going to stick our wonderful marzipan
0:27:39 > 0:27:41to our lovely Christmas cake.
0:27:41 > 0:27:44And all you do is that.
0:27:44 > 0:27:45There we go.
0:27:46 > 0:27:47And there...
0:27:48 > 0:27:53..is our cake ready to receive its lovely winter coat.
0:27:53 > 0:27:55We've bought ready-rolled marzipan.
0:27:58 > 0:27:59Oh, I think it's going to work, dude.
0:27:59 > 0:28:04- Oh, look at that.- It is. And we just mould that down with your hands.
0:28:04 > 0:28:05Look how smooth that is.
0:28:05 > 0:28:06We'll cut this round here.
0:28:08 > 0:28:11Mr King, make it beautiful!
0:28:19 > 0:28:20Oh, it's beginning to sizzle.
0:28:26 > 0:28:28The force will be with you, always.
0:28:28 > 0:28:33- Thank you, Jon.- Now, over here, we've got all manner of decorations.
0:28:33 > 0:28:34We've got the ubiquitous sprig of holly.
0:28:34 > 0:28:36- That's a good bit.- Oh, nice.
0:28:36 > 0:28:37That'll do. We're just going to use those
0:28:37 > 0:28:41as almost Christmas decorations on the cake.
0:28:41 > 0:28:43- Shall we start with this?- Yeah.
0:28:44 > 0:28:46Just push it in so it stays in place.
0:28:48 > 0:28:50I'm going to put that there, so it's...
0:28:50 > 0:28:52Oh, that's nice, Dave, just that, actually.
0:28:52 > 0:28:53Looks lovely.
0:28:53 > 0:28:55Cos it is a spiced Christmas cake,
0:28:55 > 0:28:57- so we want to give that idea of spice.- Yeah.
0:28:57 > 0:29:00Just to finish, that little coronet.
0:29:00 > 0:29:01Do you think that's enough, Si?
0:29:01 > 0:29:03I certainly, certainly do.
0:29:03 > 0:29:05- Yes.- A work of art, that.
0:29:05 > 0:29:09Well, that is our last-minute spiced Christmas cake, Jon.
0:29:09 > 0:29:12That is wonderful. What a work of art that is.
0:29:12 > 0:29:17- Well, it's as much for eating as decoration.- Absolutely.
0:29:17 > 0:29:18Go on, Kingy, let's have a slice.
0:29:18 > 0:29:20- Are we allowed to now?- Yes, we are.
0:29:20 > 0:29:22- I've waited for this.- Let's go here.
0:29:24 > 0:29:26Got just the right amount of resistance, doesn't it, the cake?
0:29:26 > 0:29:28It sort of fights back a little bit.
0:29:28 > 0:29:30- OK.- Oh, my goodness.
0:29:30 > 0:29:33Oh, yes, look at that. It's a good looker.
0:29:33 > 0:29:34- Right, come on, let's go.- May I?
0:29:34 > 0:29:36My mother used to say it was almost too nice to cut.
0:29:36 > 0:29:38SI AND DAVE LAUGH
0:29:40 > 0:29:41What do you reckon?
0:29:44 > 0:29:45- Good?- Oh!
0:29:48 > 0:29:51- AS TRUMP:- I think this is a wonderful cake, it's so beautiful,
0:29:51 > 0:29:53it was so wonderful to witness how you made it.
0:29:53 > 0:29:54And the marzipan,
0:29:54 > 0:29:57I'm going to use it as my hair for when it's raining
0:29:57 > 0:29:59and that's going to be so fantastic.
0:29:59 > 0:30:01You would not believe how great that cake is,
0:30:01 > 0:30:03it's a great cake, it's fantastic, I love how you did that,
0:30:03 > 0:30:04that is fantastic.
0:30:06 > 0:30:08Last-minute Christmas cake.
0:30:08 > 0:30:10Rich, fruity and spectacular.
0:30:20 > 0:30:24If you're still looking for that special Christmas gift,
0:30:24 > 0:30:26why not try and make one yourself?
0:30:26 > 0:30:30Christian Bigland has the perfect festive suggestion
0:30:30 > 0:30:33that would brighten anybody's stocking.
0:30:33 > 0:30:39The reason why I'm poaching pears in sherry is, well,
0:30:39 > 0:30:42because it's Christmas, and, for me,
0:30:42 > 0:30:45and probably for a lot of other people,
0:30:45 > 0:30:48sherry and Christmas go hand-in-hand.
0:30:48 > 0:30:52What I want to try and entice is a little comfort
0:30:52 > 0:30:56when I give a gift, you know, and also a little warmth.
0:30:58 > 0:31:01I think sherry might have a little bit of a bad rep as being that warm,
0:31:01 > 0:31:05dusty bottle in your granny's booze cabinet,
0:31:05 > 0:31:08which has been there for years.
0:31:08 > 0:31:12However, what's been happening is that sherry's been gaining
0:31:12 > 0:31:16in popularity, and there are some beautiful sherries available.
0:31:16 > 0:31:20I've chosen oloroso, which has been aged,
0:31:20 > 0:31:23so it's got a beautiful, nutty flavour.
0:31:23 > 0:31:25The colour is really attractive.
0:31:25 > 0:31:29It's got a kind of chestnut colour to it.
0:31:29 > 0:31:34So, we've got lemons, cinnamon, cardamom and bay leaf.
0:31:34 > 0:31:39And slightly spoilt is how I feel when saffron is on the table.
0:31:39 > 0:31:41So, I thought I'd chuck that in
0:31:41 > 0:31:45just to give it that extra Christmas feel.
0:31:45 > 0:31:50And the flavours that I'm adding are all absorbed and soaked up
0:31:50 > 0:31:55into those pears, so that every bite of that pear
0:31:55 > 0:31:58just reminds you of the season, the time of year.
0:31:58 > 0:32:04Poached pears can be made and eaten immediately.
0:32:04 > 0:32:07Or, because that syrup is high in sugar
0:32:07 > 0:32:13and has the spice flavour, you can cover the pears with the syrup,
0:32:13 > 0:32:16jar it in a beautiful jar.
0:32:16 > 0:32:20The pears are there, shining like little jewels.
0:32:20 > 0:32:24Everyone's favourite time in the meal, arguably, the pudding.
0:32:24 > 0:32:27So, I'm bringing pudding to the party this Christmas.
0:32:27 > 0:32:33A nice luggage label telling the recipient about the pears,
0:32:33 > 0:32:35and there's a beautiful gift.
0:32:58 > 0:33:03We have the one, the only Denise Lewis OBE, and gold medal Olympian.
0:33:03 > 0:33:05- Welcome. Thank you for having me. - And a very merry Christmas to you.
0:33:05 > 0:33:07- Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas to you, too.
0:33:07 > 0:33:09Do you love Christmas?
0:33:09 > 0:33:12I do, and I have grown to love it even more so since I have had
0:33:12 > 0:33:14my children and my own family.
0:33:14 > 0:33:17Of course, of course, because it is the big event, it's the big day,
0:33:17 > 0:33:19everybody gets excited.
0:33:19 > 0:33:23Yeah, they get excited, it's a chance to spend time together,
0:33:23 > 0:33:25real quality time which we are all searching for.
0:33:25 > 0:33:28And so, the perfect time is Christmas.
0:33:28 > 0:33:29How old are your children?
0:33:29 > 0:33:3215, 11 and 9.
0:33:32 > 0:33:35So they are actually fully immersive in Christmas now.
0:33:35 > 0:33:38- They love it.- We have got a special dish for you.
0:33:38 > 0:33:42We're going to cook an Italian porchetta roast on a bed of potatoes
0:33:42 > 0:33:45and onions. It is a wonderful party sharing dish.
0:33:45 > 0:33:48Now, what the butcher has done is he has boned this loin out,
0:33:48 > 0:33:50but left the pork belly.
0:33:50 > 0:33:54What happens is the fat seeps into the loin,
0:33:54 > 0:33:56and keeps it beautifully moist.
0:33:56 > 0:34:00I have to say, as a child, we didn't eat that much pork,
0:34:00 > 0:34:03and I used to just assume it was because it was so dry.
0:34:03 > 0:34:06Well, this is an absolute cast-iron guarantee that you're going to get
0:34:06 > 0:34:09a moist, tasty, beautifully crispy joint.
0:34:09 > 0:34:10I'm going to make a stuffing,
0:34:10 > 0:34:13but it is not a stuffing like you would do for turkey or...
0:34:13 > 0:34:15It is more a paste, isn't it?
0:34:15 > 0:34:19Now, that is a whole head of garlic, some chilli flakes,
0:34:19 > 0:34:21and some crushed fennel seeds.
0:34:21 > 0:34:24About three tablespoons of rosemary, and the zest of a lemon.
0:34:24 > 0:34:26I can smell some of those herbs.
0:34:26 > 0:34:28- Yeah.- Just imagine.
0:34:28 > 0:34:29I'm just wasting time here.
0:34:29 > 0:34:31Wow.
0:34:31 > 0:34:35So, Denise, do you do the cooking at home at Christmas?
0:34:35 > 0:34:37Well, it's actually a bit of a family affair.
0:34:37 > 0:34:42As it should be. Obviously, I do most of the hard work, of course.
0:34:42 > 0:34:44THEY LAUGH
0:34:44 > 0:34:47But my kids and my husband get stuck in, you know,
0:34:47 > 0:34:51so they will be in charge of the potatoes, the veg,
0:34:51 > 0:34:55and I will take care of all the meat and the presentation.
0:34:55 > 0:34:58- The table layout... - Who does the drinks at Christmas?
0:34:58 > 0:35:01That's my husband. Yeah, he does the drinks,
0:35:01 > 0:35:04and he will certainly hammer through them as well, but it's...!
0:35:06 > 0:35:08Well done, Steve, well done.
0:35:08 > 0:35:10I'm going to put a bit of olive oil in,
0:35:10 > 0:35:14then I'm going to dribble white wine in until we have that said paste.
0:35:14 > 0:35:19Can you just use any white wine or does it have to be cooking wine?
0:35:19 > 0:35:21No, there is a really famous saying.
0:35:21 > 0:35:25Never put anything into a dish that you're not prepared to drink.
0:35:25 > 0:35:28- That was Keith Floyd, wasn't it? - It was.- Are we there yet?
0:35:28 > 0:35:31- Are we there yet?- Are we there yet!- A little bit more.
0:35:32 > 0:35:35About 50ml of wine will do nicely.
0:35:35 > 0:35:37Do you enjoy cooking?
0:35:37 > 0:35:42I do. But I've had to get used to larger numbers.
0:35:42 > 0:35:44But I think that's where the preparation comes in handy.
0:35:44 > 0:35:46In one, absolutely.
0:35:46 > 0:35:47Are you good at preparation?
0:35:47 > 0:35:50I've got better. I've got better over the years, you know,
0:35:50 > 0:35:55certain things that you can do, you can leave things overnight,
0:35:55 > 0:35:58and so you can actually interact with people instead of just being
0:35:58 > 0:36:00head down in the kitchen all day.
0:36:00 > 0:36:02Well, this dish is perfect for a party,
0:36:02 > 0:36:05because of course you can make it a couple of days in advance.
0:36:05 > 0:36:08You get it rolled, stuffed, you leave it in the fridge for two days,
0:36:08 > 0:36:11the flavours are just going to get better and better.
0:36:11 > 0:36:14So, Denise, how did you learn how to cook?
0:36:14 > 0:36:16By observation, just watched my mum.
0:36:16 > 0:36:18She was a really good cook.
0:36:18 > 0:36:20She liked to experiment.
0:36:20 > 0:36:24And so, it must have filtered into my consciousness,
0:36:24 > 0:36:27because I never thought I'd be able to prepare the meals that I do today.
0:36:27 > 0:36:30Well, you know, I think that's how we all learn, isn't it?
0:36:30 > 0:36:32I mean, certainly, Dave and I, from our parents, and friends.
0:36:32 > 0:36:34And the pleasure you get from that.
0:36:34 > 0:36:36- Yeah.- But are you laidback at Christmas
0:36:36 > 0:36:38or are you kind of hyper organised?
0:36:38 > 0:36:42I tell you what I have done is popped round to the neighbours,
0:36:42 > 0:36:45and had very unusual sparkling Shiraz.
0:36:45 > 0:36:47Oh, yes.
0:36:47 > 0:36:49- It's nice that.- And lethal.
0:36:49 > 0:36:50Yeah, no, it does get you a bit tiddly.
0:36:50 > 0:36:53Yes, I had probably two, three glasses of that,
0:36:53 > 0:36:59forgot that the turkey was in, half an hour/hour chat turned into four hours,
0:36:59 > 0:37:01and it was carnage.
0:37:01 > 0:37:02My bird was literally...
0:37:02 > 0:37:06When I came to pick it up, the undercarriage fell off.
0:37:06 > 0:37:07- Overcooked.- I've got to say,
0:37:07 > 0:37:10when your undercarriage falls off your bird, it's a tragic tale of woe.
0:37:10 > 0:37:13It is. What has Santa left for you?
0:37:13 > 0:37:14The undercarriage and no breast!
0:37:14 > 0:37:17You could just have told your guests it was Cajun.
0:37:17 > 0:37:19- I know!- You could have!
0:37:19 > 0:37:24Right, so I've just put the onions and the potatoes in the tray
0:37:24 > 0:37:27ready to receive those beautiful cooking juices.
0:37:29 > 0:37:31It's where you go all panto, isn't it?
0:37:31 > 0:37:34Do you just slob out in front of the telly like the rest of us
0:37:34 > 0:37:35on Christmas Day and Boxing Day?
0:37:35 > 0:37:39- Yes.- Cos I bet you've got lots of tracksuits!
0:37:39 > 0:37:41I've got a fair few.
0:37:41 > 0:37:43But, yeah, I like to relax.
0:37:43 > 0:37:47But I'm always on the go. I'm an industrious worker at Christmas, as well.
0:37:47 > 0:37:50Well, yeah, you look like an industrious worker, I have to say.
0:37:50 > 0:37:53Of course. Now, here is a top tip.
0:37:53 > 0:37:57What we're going to do is we are going to put a little pocket
0:37:57 > 0:37:59to receive Dave's fantastic paste.
0:37:59 > 0:38:00Shall we stuff some down there?
0:38:00 > 0:38:03- Absolutely.- For starters. But you get almost like,
0:38:03 > 0:38:06when you cut it, you get this little vein of herbage.
0:38:06 > 0:38:08Herbage? I love that.
0:38:08 > 0:38:10- Herbage.- But it is great cold, this dish, as well.
0:38:10 > 0:38:12So lovely.
0:38:12 > 0:38:15That is a top tip. Obviously people are used to scoring on the outside,
0:38:15 > 0:38:17but also this pocket is handy.
0:38:17 > 0:38:18It smells fantastic.
0:38:18 > 0:38:20- Doesn't it?- Yeah. - Doesn't it smell great?
0:38:20 > 0:38:22Now, if you've noticed,
0:38:22 > 0:38:25what we haven't done is there is no salt in this paste,
0:38:25 > 0:38:28because if you put salt in now, it will draw all the moisture out
0:38:28 > 0:38:30of the meat, which is fatal.
0:38:30 > 0:38:31That is what we don't want.
0:38:31 > 0:38:33We are trying to keep the moisture in.
0:38:33 > 0:38:36So what are you going to cook for Christmas lunch, Denise?
0:38:36 > 0:38:38Well, depending on how this turns out...
0:38:39 > 0:38:40- Might have a convert.- Oh, brilliant!
0:38:40 > 0:38:43Might be a convert. I think it's fantastic.
0:38:43 > 0:38:45The thing about porcetta is, remember, it's this big.
0:38:45 > 0:38:49If you get a pork loin that's that long, it's exactly the same method.
0:38:49 > 0:38:54So you could feed 15, 20 people, and what a centrepiece for your party.
0:38:54 > 0:38:56So...
0:38:56 > 0:38:57Should I hold and you knot?
0:38:57 > 0:38:59Absolutely. That would be grand.
0:38:59 > 0:39:01Do you still indulge in all the pigs in blankets?
0:39:01 > 0:39:03There will be literally a fight going on in the house
0:39:03 > 0:39:05if there are no pigs in blankets.
0:39:05 > 0:39:07We once wrote a leftover recipe
0:39:07 > 0:39:09that involved leftover pigs in blankets,
0:39:09 > 0:39:11and somebody said, "Are you mad?!
0:39:11 > 0:39:12"This is not going to happen!"
0:39:13 > 0:39:16But even with your rarefied athletic system,
0:39:16 > 0:39:19do you allow yourself pigs in blankets and bread sauce,
0:39:19 > 0:39:21or does it sabotage the entire machine?
0:39:21 > 0:39:24What I do is I pick them out, some of them, before I get to the table.
0:39:24 > 0:39:29So I have my portion whilst I'm cooking, so no-one notices that I'm eating it,
0:39:29 > 0:39:31so I create an illusion of holiness.
0:39:31 > 0:39:32Yes, well, ladies and gentlemen,
0:39:32 > 0:39:36the doughnut on the way to the car from the supermarket car park,
0:39:36 > 0:39:37that does count.
0:39:39 > 0:39:41- You devil!- I know, little devil.
0:39:41 > 0:39:44Now, we have got this rolled, we have got the paste in,
0:39:44 > 0:39:46we have some water in the bottom of the tray.
0:39:46 > 0:39:50- Why the water?- It stops it burning, then we've got some wine.
0:39:50 > 0:39:54You probably want to leave this to dry out and to be in the fridge
0:39:54 > 0:39:56for at least 24 hours.
0:39:56 > 0:39:59And the reason that we want the skin to dry out
0:39:59 > 0:40:02is that it forms a better crackling,
0:40:02 > 0:40:05and then we will push salt into all of those scores
0:40:05 > 0:40:08that your lovely butcher has made.
0:40:08 > 0:40:10So it's OK to salt the skin, but not the meat?
0:40:10 > 0:40:13- Definitely.- You must salt the skin.
0:40:13 > 0:40:15- Yeah.- Perfect.
0:40:15 > 0:40:17And then just rub it all over with oil.
0:40:17 > 0:40:19OK?
0:40:19 > 0:40:23And then season with salt again, and have you noticed,
0:40:23 > 0:40:25the salt now starts to stick,
0:40:25 > 0:40:30and it will form a beautiful salty crust which will help the crackling no end.
0:40:30 > 0:40:33It's fantastic. I mean, it looks impressive,
0:40:33 > 0:40:38but the top tips there that I think people can really apply
0:40:38 > 0:40:41to their cooking and just make a big difference.
0:40:41 > 0:40:47Now, this needs to go into a low oven, 150 Celsius, for four hours.
0:40:47 > 0:40:51Then we take the foil off, and put the oven right up to, say, 200,
0:40:51 > 0:40:54220 Celsius, for the last half-hour,
0:40:54 > 0:40:56and your joint will be cooked perfectly.
0:41:03 > 0:41:05Beautiful porchetta.
0:41:05 > 0:41:08I feel like I want to give it a round of applause,
0:41:08 > 0:41:10it looks that fantastic.
0:41:10 > 0:41:13That crackling is a sight to behold.
0:41:13 > 0:41:14Did your mum use to do this?
0:41:14 > 0:41:16SPOON TAPS ON CRACKLING
0:41:16 > 0:41:19Listen to it, I mean, it's just...
0:41:19 > 0:41:22- It's just beautiful. - Yes, it's all right, there.
0:41:22 > 0:41:24Should I, Mr Myers?
0:41:24 > 0:41:27You carve, I will serve up the accoutrements.
0:41:27 > 0:41:31It's lovely, you can see the herbs in the middle.
0:41:31 > 0:41:32Phwoar!
0:41:34 > 0:41:36There is a big bit of crackling there.
0:41:36 > 0:41:38- Yeah.- And it has definitely got Denise's name all over it.
0:41:38 > 0:41:42That has got my name on it, hasn't it? This is the moment I've been waiting for.
0:41:42 > 0:41:43Yes!
0:41:43 > 0:41:48- Thank you for coming.- Thank you for having me, this looks incredible.
0:41:48 > 0:41:50You're very, very welcome.
0:41:54 > 0:41:56Mm.
0:41:56 > 0:41:58Those herbs.
0:41:58 > 0:42:00- Yeah.- For me, it is so succulent.
0:42:00 > 0:42:02Oh, brilliant.
0:42:03 > 0:42:05- Go on, mate, let's have a go. - Apple sauce.
0:42:06 > 0:42:07Now, that pops.
0:42:07 > 0:42:10- Doesn't it?- That really does pop.
0:42:10 > 0:42:13But there is one bit you can't just cut with your fork.
0:42:13 > 0:42:18- No.- No.- And this is where I regress to my childhood.- Go on, Denise.
0:42:18 > 0:42:19PORK CRACKLES
0:42:19 > 0:42:22Oh!
0:42:24 > 0:42:25Magic.
0:42:27 > 0:42:29Porchetta pork loin,
0:42:29 > 0:42:32perfect for when you have a crowd.
0:42:41 > 0:42:43Welcome to our little world of Christmas joy!
0:42:43 > 0:42:46- Kate Bottley!- Hey!- Wa-hey!
0:42:46 > 0:42:48It's so festive and gorgeous!
0:42:48 > 0:42:51- It's like you! Look at you! - Well, I did like to make an effort.
0:42:51 > 0:42:53I tell you what, Reverend, you look fantastic.
0:42:53 > 0:42:56- Thank you very much.- And it's great for the big day that we all
0:42:56 > 0:42:58haven't got to forget actually what it's about.
0:42:58 > 0:43:01- It's a Christian festival. - It is a Christian festival.
0:43:01 > 0:43:03I think the thing is about Christmas Day, it's about family,
0:43:03 > 0:43:06it's about friends, and it's about food, isn't it?
0:43:06 > 0:43:08You know, and it's about getting together and everyone just seems
0:43:08 > 0:43:11a little bit nicer to each other on Christmas Day.
0:43:11 > 0:43:14Well, until about four o'clock in the afternoon when they all
0:43:14 > 0:43:16- fall out over Monopoly!- Do you actually get Christmas Day off?
0:43:16 > 0:43:19Well, I work Christmas Day morning, of course,
0:43:19 > 0:43:20and Christmas Eve's really busy.
0:43:20 > 0:43:22And do you take mass on Christmas Day morning?
0:43:22 > 0:43:24Yes, Christmas morning. We have champagne, though,
0:43:24 > 0:43:27- in the cup on Christmas Day Mass! - You rebel!- I know, right?
0:43:27 > 0:43:30And I always wear my 'jamas under my robes so that at the end
0:43:30 > 0:43:33of the service, I can whip my robes off and get straight home,
0:43:33 > 0:43:36get on the cooking and get on a nice glass of something as well.
0:43:36 > 0:43:39You cannot have Christmas without a bit of bubbly.
0:43:39 > 0:43:41- SHE GASPS - There we go.
0:43:41 > 0:43:44Wonderful. Thank you. Your health.
0:43:44 > 0:43:47- And yours.- Cheers.
0:43:47 > 0:43:51Right. We do need a bit of divine inspiration on this one.
0:43:51 > 0:43:55- I'll say my prayers.- Because the big day requires a big dessert.
0:43:55 > 0:43:58We're going to make the biggest dessert we have ever made
0:43:58 > 0:44:00in our television cooking career.
0:44:00 > 0:44:02- Yeah.- We're going to make...
0:44:02 > 0:44:04- A croquembouche.- Just for you.
0:44:04 > 0:44:07Wow, I am...I'm almost speechless, which never happens.
0:44:07 > 0:44:09But not, like, that big.
0:44:09 > 0:44:13- No, no...- This one will require 100 choux buns,
0:44:13 > 0:44:16- with a cardamom cream filling in each one.- Ooh.
0:44:16 > 0:44:19But, first, the choux pastry.
0:44:19 > 0:44:20So we put the butter...
0:44:22 > 0:44:24..the milk...
0:44:26 > 0:44:28..the caster sugar...
0:44:30 > 0:44:33..and 130ml of water.
0:44:34 > 0:44:36And a nice pinch of salt.
0:44:37 > 0:44:40Stir until all of the butter is melted.
0:44:42 > 0:44:44275g of plain flour.
0:44:47 > 0:44:51And you mix that until it forms a ball of dough
0:44:51 > 0:44:54that comes away from the side of the pan.
0:44:56 > 0:45:00And then beat for about another minute or so.
0:45:02 > 0:45:04Remove from the heat.
0:45:04 > 0:45:07It needs to stand and cool for five minutes,
0:45:07 > 0:45:09and then you can add the eggs.
0:45:11 > 0:45:14And pipe into 3cm rounds.
0:45:18 > 0:45:20Now, you need to bake these in a preheated oven
0:45:20 > 0:45:23at 200 degrees Celsius for ten minutes.
0:45:23 > 0:45:28After that, turn it down to about 175, 180 degrees Celsius,
0:45:28 > 0:45:32for a further 20 to 25 minutes, until they're cooked through.
0:45:32 > 0:45:36Now, Kate, seeing as you're here, we always ask all of our guests,
0:45:36 > 0:45:40what was it like at Christmas when you were a child?
0:45:41 > 0:45:43It was amazing and magical and fantastic,
0:45:43 > 0:45:45and all those words and more.
0:45:45 > 0:45:48You know, there's nothing quite like the Christmases of your childhood,
0:45:48 > 0:45:51is there? And I remember, I used to go to bed on Christmas Eve,
0:45:51 > 0:45:54and we used to have a pillow case at the end of the bed for the presents
0:45:54 > 0:45:57to go in, and I remember, in the early hours of the morning,
0:45:57 > 0:46:00just nudging my foot at the end of the bed and feeling
0:46:00 > 0:46:02that the presents were in the pillowcase!
0:46:02 > 0:46:04Oh, there's nothing like it, is there?
0:46:04 > 0:46:06And lying there, and thinking, "I'm not allowed up yet,
0:46:06 > 0:46:09"I'm not allowed up yet," and just waiting until that clock
0:46:09 > 0:46:12reached seven o'clock, knowing that's when I was allowed
0:46:12 > 0:46:14to get out of bed. And then we dragged the pillowcase
0:46:14 > 0:46:15- into Mum and Dad's room.- Yeah.
0:46:15 > 0:46:18And it always seemed like we dragged it, I'm sure it wasn't,
0:46:18 > 0:46:21but it felt like just the biggest pillowcase stuffed with presents.
0:46:21 > 0:46:24Drag it into Mum and Dad's room, climb into Mum and Dad's bed,
0:46:24 > 0:46:26and open all the presents then.
0:46:26 > 0:46:28A sort of mountain of wrapping paper.
0:46:28 > 0:46:31When I got married to my lovely Graham, I remember saying,
0:46:31 > 0:46:33"But we have pillowcases at the end of the bed."
0:46:33 > 0:46:36And he went, "No, we don't, we have stockings under the tree."
0:46:36 > 0:46:39And I was like, "How are we going to do this, then?"
0:46:39 > 0:46:41On the big day, when you were a kid,
0:46:41 > 0:46:43did you used to have any special treats for breakfast?
0:46:43 > 0:46:47We used to have, when I was a kid, as a treat on Christmas Day,
0:46:47 > 0:46:50cornflakes with double cream on them.
0:46:50 > 0:46:52Oh!
0:46:52 > 0:46:54That's really naughty, isn't it?
0:46:54 > 0:46:57And you could always have a little extra sugar on there as well.
0:46:57 > 0:47:00- That's what we used to have as kids.- Perfect. It is, isn't it?
0:47:00 > 0:47:02Yeah, Christmas is an amazing time, and, you know,
0:47:02 > 0:47:05I think as your kids get older, you sort of,
0:47:05 > 0:47:08you sort of get a bit nostalgic for when they were really tiny.
0:47:08 > 0:47:10- Yes.- And it was really magical.
0:47:10 > 0:47:13In fact, I think it's more exciting for the grown-ups
0:47:13 > 0:47:15- than it is for the kids! - I know. It's lovely.
0:47:15 > 0:47:18It's the best, but we've got a little present for you, yes, we have.
0:47:18 > 0:47:20- How lovely!- Yes, well, you know, it's Christmas!
0:47:20 > 0:47:22Now, you need to open it this...
0:47:22 > 0:47:24Keep it this way up when you open it.
0:47:24 > 0:47:26- OK, am I allowed to open it now? - Oh, yes.
0:47:26 > 0:47:28- Or do I need to save it? - Definitely, yes.- No, no, absolutely.
0:47:28 > 0:47:30What's this?
0:47:31 > 0:47:33Oh!
0:47:33 > 0:47:36It's a Sindy hostess trolley!
0:47:36 > 0:47:39- Yay! - This is the best present ever!
0:47:39 > 0:47:42Oh, this is amazing!
0:47:42 > 0:47:44Oh, look! And it's even got little food inside!
0:47:44 > 0:47:46Oh, this is so great!
0:47:46 > 0:47:48I am SO pleased with this.
0:47:48 > 0:47:50So... Oh, look at this... I remember these!
0:47:50 > 0:47:52So the story with this is,
0:47:52 > 0:47:56my best Christmas present I ever had was a Sindy doll's house.
0:47:56 > 0:48:00And my poor dad had been out on Christmas Eve and had to stay up
0:48:00 > 0:48:02and build the doll's house,
0:48:02 > 0:48:04because Father Christmas had brought it unbuilt,
0:48:04 > 0:48:06and he was up until three, four in the morning,
0:48:06 > 0:48:08building this doll's house,
0:48:08 > 0:48:10after having a really good evening out with my uncle David.
0:48:10 > 0:48:13So I remember coming down on Christmas Day morning,
0:48:13 > 0:48:14my dad was still asleep on the sofa,
0:48:14 > 0:48:17and the doll's house was there, sort of half-constructed.
0:48:17 > 0:48:19But the hostess trolley is absolutely perfect.
0:48:19 > 0:48:20Has it got plates in it as well?
0:48:20 > 0:48:22Oh, look!
0:48:22 > 0:48:25This is so great! You do what you need to do,
0:48:25 > 0:48:27I'm just going to play for a little while!
0:48:27 > 0:48:28- This is brilliant!- It's great!
0:48:28 > 0:48:30Honestly, you don't know how happy I am.
0:48:30 > 0:48:32Look at the carrots. This is so great.
0:48:34 > 0:48:36Right, that's the choux buns all baked.
0:48:36 > 0:48:39Now, what we need to do is to make a spiced cream,
0:48:39 > 0:48:44and pipe it into each one of those 100 choux buns.
0:48:44 > 0:48:47Make a little hole in preparation for the cream just here.
0:48:47 > 0:48:50Now, the spiced cream consists of double cream,
0:48:50 > 0:48:55which I'm going to whip up, icing sugar, cardamom and coffee essence.
0:48:58 > 0:49:00- Go on, dude, go on. - Just keep adding the icing sugar.
0:49:03 > 0:49:04Now just whip it.
0:49:06 > 0:49:08I'm very happy with this.
0:49:08 > 0:49:09Very, very happy with this.
0:49:09 > 0:49:13Kate, are you more a sweet or savoury person?
0:49:13 > 0:49:15- I'm just a food person. - Yeah, you just love it.
0:49:15 > 0:49:18Yeah, just lots of it, plenty of it, you know,
0:49:18 > 0:49:21- especially at Christmas.- That's such a Yorkshire thing as well,
0:49:21 > 0:49:24that, isn't it? Like, everybody in Yorkshire likes pretty big portions,
0:49:24 > 0:49:27- don't they?- We like us dinners. - Generous.- Generous portions, lovely.
0:49:27 > 0:49:28We like us dinners.
0:49:28 > 0:49:31I think this should be a challenge to your parishioners.
0:49:31 > 0:49:32I think you need to make her,
0:49:32 > 0:49:34our good Reverend,
0:49:34 > 0:49:36a croquembouche, and surprise her.
0:49:36 > 0:49:38- Yep.- After Midnight Mass.
0:49:38 > 0:49:41- You know, it's my favourite service of the year, Midnight Mass.- Love it.
0:49:41 > 0:49:44Because, what I do is I make sure that I get out of the church first,
0:49:44 > 0:49:46and go into the empty churchyard, all on my own,
0:49:46 > 0:49:48look up at the stars,
0:49:48 > 0:49:50and just have that lovely moment of peace and quiet,
0:49:50 > 0:49:53knowing that you've made it, it's Christmas Day.
0:49:53 > 0:49:57And then I shout at the top of my voice, "Merry Christmas!"
0:49:57 > 0:49:59So that anyone who hasn't been to church is awake,
0:49:59 > 0:50:01and knows that we've been on their behalf.
0:50:01 > 0:50:03And in my last parish, there was a farmer who, when I used to
0:50:03 > 0:50:06do that, he used to come and stand beside me, and he'd just go,
0:50:06 > 0:50:09"Merry Christmas, Vicar," and I'd go, "Merry Christmas," and then we'd
0:50:09 > 0:50:12have a little tipple out of his hip flask, and go on us way.
0:50:12 > 0:50:14It's just lovely, just lovely.
0:50:14 > 0:50:17And it is little moments like that that are so special.
0:50:17 > 0:50:19It's about those lovely little traditions
0:50:19 > 0:50:21at a time of peace and harmony, it's lovely.
0:50:21 > 0:50:23Everybody knows that, you know,
0:50:23 > 0:50:25I think when we talk about people forgetting the true meaning
0:50:25 > 0:50:28of Christmas, I genuinely don't think that's the case.
0:50:28 > 0:50:29No, I don't, either.
0:50:29 > 0:50:31We all get lost in it, course we do, presents are brilliant,
0:50:31 > 0:50:34but actually we all know what it's really about.
0:50:34 > 0:50:36- It is, of course we do. - We all know what it's really about.
0:50:36 > 0:50:38Et voila.
0:50:38 > 0:50:41And repeat another 99 times. Shall I crack on with the caramel?
0:50:41 > 0:50:43- Yeah, man, I'll just crack on with this.- Right.
0:50:43 > 0:50:45You just need ordinary caster sugar.
0:50:45 > 0:50:48Now, when this reaches 154 degrees Celsius,
0:50:48 > 0:50:51it will be caramel and not sugar.
0:50:51 > 0:50:54At this time, it is extremely hot. Please be careful.
0:50:54 > 0:50:56We put it in a pan...
0:50:58 > 0:51:00..and we kind of let it melt. Don't stir it.
0:51:00 > 0:51:04And once it starts, you just roll it around the pan,
0:51:04 > 0:51:07but let the weight of the sugar take itself.
0:51:07 > 0:51:08Oh, look, look, look.
0:51:10 > 0:51:12See how the caramel is starting?
0:51:12 > 0:51:16I'm just swishing that around the pan a little bit, like that.
0:51:17 > 0:51:1998!
0:51:19 > 0:51:21I'm nearly finished.
0:51:22 > 0:51:2499.
0:51:27 > 0:51:29100!
0:51:29 > 0:51:31- I've done it.- Yay!- That's it.
0:51:31 > 0:51:35Well, that indeed is what I would term as caramel coloured.
0:51:35 > 0:51:39- Beautiful caramel.- So, the first ring, he can be there,
0:51:39 > 0:51:40that fellow on his own.
0:51:40 > 0:51:43We dip the side in there, like so...
0:51:44 > 0:51:46..and stick him to his mate.
0:51:48 > 0:51:51And so on and so forth.
0:51:52 > 0:51:54It's like... It's like a culinary Airfix.
0:51:54 > 0:51:57It is. And has anyone ever made you a croquembouche before?
0:51:57 > 0:52:00Nobody's ever made me a croquembouche before.
0:52:00 > 0:52:03There's a reason for that, cos no-one is flipping daft enough, that's why!
0:52:05 > 0:52:07I love this.
0:52:07 > 0:52:10I'm very good with repetitive tasks.
0:52:10 > 0:52:12You could put some carols on the radio, couldn't you?
0:52:12 > 0:52:14- You could.- Or put a little Christmas movie on.- Yeah.
0:52:14 > 0:52:16Pass afternoon on lovely, this.
0:52:16 > 0:52:18Right. What's your favourite carol?
0:52:18 > 0:52:21I love Joy To The World, but because I'm a vicar,
0:52:21 > 0:52:26we sing carols often, so you might only go to one carol service,
0:52:26 > 0:52:29we've been to ten. Do you know what I'm saying?
0:52:29 > 0:52:32- I know what you're saying. - So the ones that are really popular
0:52:32 > 0:52:34are the ones that we've sung over and over,
0:52:34 > 0:52:36so I really like In The Bleak Midwinter.
0:52:36 > 0:52:38- Oh, I like that.- Yes.
0:52:38 > 0:52:41Because it's one that we don't often sing,
0:52:41 > 0:52:44so it's not a Silent Night, it's not an Away In A Manger,
0:52:44 > 0:52:47it's one that's a little bit left-field and that's not as popular
0:52:47 > 0:52:49as all the others and I really like that.
0:52:49 > 0:52:53But you can't beat on Christmas Day O Come All Ye Faithful because you
0:52:53 > 0:52:57finally get to sing the last verse of O Come All Ye Faithful, which is,
0:52:57 > 0:52:59- "Yea, Lord, we greet thee, born this happy morning."- Yes!
0:52:59 > 0:53:02And you're not allowed to sing that until the big day itself.
0:53:02 > 0:53:05Do you get louder and louder as it goes on?
0:53:05 > 0:53:08Yeah, usually. Especially at Christmas Eve,
0:53:08 > 0:53:11especially at Midnight Mass when the pubs chuck out and the churches
0:53:11 > 0:53:14open their doors and everyone has a right good old singsong.
0:53:14 > 0:53:16- Yeah.- This is all going mightily well.
0:53:16 > 0:53:18- It is.- I'm very impressed.
0:53:18 > 0:53:20Look at this, it's more like a scone, this one.
0:53:20 > 0:53:23- What have you done here? - I haven't done anything.
0:53:23 > 0:53:24It's as big as an elf's head, that one.
0:53:24 > 0:53:27You know what they say - as long as you've got your 'elf!
0:53:27 > 0:53:31- That's true.- If you're poorly, you can always go to the National Elf Service.
0:53:31 > 0:53:34Oh, stop, you two, for goodness' sake!
0:53:36 > 0:53:38So, how do you get that bit out?
0:53:38 > 0:53:40Because this is so squidgy,
0:53:40 > 0:53:42it should, theoretically, just pull out.
0:53:42 > 0:53:44I love a good theory.
0:53:46 > 0:53:48Don't collapse, don't collapse.
0:53:48 > 0:53:50You beauty, Kingy!
0:53:50 > 0:53:52That'll do, won't it? Does that look all right?
0:53:52 > 0:53:54- Lovely.- That's holding it nicely.
0:53:57 > 0:53:59- I'm there.- There?
0:54:01 > 0:54:03- Get off! - Sorry, I just can't help it.
0:54:03 > 0:54:05- I'm so worried.- Yeah.
0:54:05 > 0:54:06Oh, that's it.
0:54:08 > 0:54:10Right... Well, that's not bad, actually.
0:54:10 > 0:54:12I'd say it's flipping good, Dave.
0:54:12 > 0:54:14- Very good. - This is the most fun I've had
0:54:14 > 0:54:16- with my dog collar on in a long time.- Is it?- Yes.
0:54:16 > 0:54:18- You've got to get out more. - I know, right?
0:54:18 > 0:54:22- Kate?- Yes, lovely.- Do you have any idea on how we're going to decorate this?
0:54:22 > 0:54:25Surely you've got some sparkle to throw at it.
0:54:25 > 0:54:26- A bit of bling. Yep.- A bit of bling.
0:54:26 > 0:54:28Yeah, yeah. We need, like, a motif for decoration.
0:54:28 > 0:54:30Could you make us anything?
0:54:30 > 0:54:32Just something to stand up...
0:54:32 > 0:54:33You know, you're arty, you.
0:54:33 > 0:54:35You make your own Christmas cards.
0:54:35 > 0:54:37I do. Have you got some tinfoil?
0:54:37 > 0:54:39- Yeah.- Yeah.- Pass me some tinfoil. - Yep, there you go.
0:54:39 > 0:54:41Right, I am going to...
0:54:41 > 0:54:45I'm going to amaze you and show you why I should have been a Blue Peter girl.
0:54:45 > 0:54:49- What's going on here?- You'd be amazed at the things that I can do.
0:54:49 > 0:54:53I can juggle, I can eat fire and I can make these.
0:54:53 > 0:54:55I went on a course at vicar school.
0:54:55 > 0:54:58- Did you?- Yeah.- It's brilliant, vicar school, I might go.
0:54:58 > 0:55:01- Can you tell what it is yet? - It's got four legs.
0:55:02 > 0:55:05I've got all the home-made Christmas decorations that my kids made
0:55:05 > 0:55:08- when they were little. - So have I!- I've still got all those.
0:55:08 > 0:55:10- I put them on the tree every year. - Yeah, me too.
0:55:10 > 0:55:12Every year there's a little bit more fallen off them
0:55:12 > 0:55:14and they're a little bit more dog-eared.
0:55:14 > 0:55:15- This is good, this. - I know what it is.
0:55:15 > 0:55:18- What is it?- I just need to find his little red nose.- Oh, Rudolph!
0:55:18 > 0:55:20It is Rudolph. But he's not got his red nose yet
0:55:20 > 0:55:22so I'm just going to pinch a bit of this.
0:55:22 > 0:55:24Just get one of those on it.
0:55:24 > 0:55:26Let's put him his red nose on.
0:55:27 > 0:55:29- That's genius.- Look at that, eh?
0:55:29 > 0:55:32- Brilliant, isn't it?- There we go. - ALL:- Yay!
0:55:34 > 0:55:37- Oh, that's brilliant. - It is good.
0:55:37 > 0:55:39I want to take that home, stick it on my tree.
0:55:39 > 0:55:40Do you want to do a bit of spun sugar?
0:55:40 > 0:55:43- Yeah, let's give it a go.- Let's try.- I'm going to lean back.
0:55:43 > 0:55:44I would.
0:55:44 > 0:55:46Well, there you go, Kingy.
0:55:46 > 0:55:49- Oh, yes.- There you go.
0:55:49 > 0:55:53- It looks beautiful.- It'll look even more beautiful in a minute.
0:55:53 > 0:55:54See what this does.
0:55:55 > 0:55:56I've got some gold.
0:56:01 > 0:56:03It's Christmas.
0:56:03 > 0:56:04It's so festive.
0:56:06 > 0:56:08Oh, please, please, please.
0:56:08 > 0:56:09- Yeah, go on.- Can I? Thanks.
0:56:14 > 0:56:16Oh, look at that!
0:56:21 > 0:56:24That's for us. Now, I've got these.
0:56:24 > 0:56:28These are special indoor light-up-your-cake sparklers.
0:56:30 > 0:56:33And we'll have one there, yeah?
0:56:33 > 0:56:35It looks amazing.
0:56:35 > 0:56:38That...is our croquembouche.
0:56:42 > 0:56:44It is so Christmassy.
0:56:48 > 0:56:50Right...
0:56:50 > 0:56:52Come on, let's taste this little one.
0:56:52 > 0:56:55Oh, I love it. Oh, this looks amazing.
0:56:55 > 0:56:59I'm trying to take a delicate, ladylike size portion but...
0:56:59 > 0:57:00- No.- Do you know what...?
0:57:06 > 0:57:08- Oh, man, that's great. - It's gorgeous.
0:57:08 > 0:57:10You're welcome.
0:57:12 > 0:57:14Christmas croquembouche.
0:57:14 > 0:57:17They'll be talking about it for years.
0:57:17 > 0:57:18Oh, Kate, merry Christmas.
0:57:18 > 0:57:21- It's been lovely to meet you. - Merry Christmas.
0:57:21 > 0:57:23- Merry Christmas to you.- And to your families and to those you love.
0:57:23 > 0:57:25- Thank you.- And you. - Merry Christmas.
0:57:25 > 0:57:28- And Merry Christmas to you, too. - Merry Christmas, gang.