0:00:02 > 0:00:05# Emergency! #
0:00:05 > 0:00:07With mind boggling medical mishaps...
0:00:07 > 0:00:09Ow!
0:00:09 > 0:00:10..and the quirkiest of casualties.
0:00:10 > 0:00:13My boyfriend dropped a turnip on my foot.
0:00:13 > 0:00:15Bizarre ER is back.
0:00:15 > 0:00:17# So come on. #
0:00:17 > 0:00:23And for the first time we've camped out in, not one, but two British hospitals...
0:00:23 > 0:00:27Northampton General and Bradford Royal Infirmary.
0:00:27 > 0:00:29Hello.
0:00:29 > 0:00:34To bring you the curious cases that are all in a day's work for the stoic staff.
0:00:34 > 0:00:35Can you see your pound coin there.
0:00:35 > 0:00:38But which have to be seen to be believed.
0:00:40 > 0:00:45Plus we've scoured the planet for the people who, thanks to amazing medics,
0:00:45 > 0:00:51have survived the most extraordinary accidents and emergencies known to man.
0:00:51 > 0:00:55Nobody believes they're going to get the Black Death.
0:00:55 > 0:00:59So scrub up, sit back and enjoy the sometimes silly,
0:00:59 > 0:01:03often odd, but never dull world of Bizarre ER.
0:01:03 > 0:01:06Well, all I can say is thank heavens for the NHS.
0:01:06 > 0:01:08Thank you.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24Coming up tonight...
0:01:24 > 0:01:27we meet the lady with lips like lilos.
0:01:27 > 0:01:31I'll just grow a hump and a club foot and just call me Igor. Ha-ha.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34One man's high flying hobby nearly cost him his hand.
0:01:34 > 0:01:36Whoa. OK.
0:01:36 > 0:01:39And a medieval menace makes a comeback in modern day Manhattan.
0:01:39 > 0:01:44I just could not believe that we had the Plague.
0:01:50 > 0:01:53But first we're heading to Northampton General
0:01:53 > 0:01:56where slack-jawed student Holly Thompson
0:01:56 > 0:02:00has arrived at A&E completely unable to close her gaping gob.
0:02:00 > 0:02:04As Holly can't really talk right now, probably best we tell you how she got here.
0:02:04 > 0:02:10Holly was at college enjoying a particularly riveting lesson of Government and Politics.
0:02:10 > 0:02:15Uninspired by the political ponderings, Holly opened wide for a yawn.
0:02:15 > 0:02:19Her massive mouth manoeuvre caused her jaw to dislocate,
0:02:19 > 0:02:22leaving her unable to close her cakehole.
0:02:23 > 0:02:28Literally speechless, Holly frantically nudged her classmate.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31Try as she might she couldn't help Holly shut her mouth
0:02:31 > 0:02:34and the pair had no choice but to interrupt the lesson.
0:02:34 > 0:02:35Hello.
0:02:35 > 0:02:37After a quick visit to the school nurse,
0:02:37 > 0:02:40who also failed to help our heroine,
0:02:40 > 0:02:44it was decided that Holly and her jangling jaw should head to A&E.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46My name's Ejiro, I'm one of the doctors.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49Obviously I can see your mouth's stuck open.
0:02:49 > 0:02:51Has it happened to you before?
0:02:51 > 0:02:52No...
0:02:52 > 0:02:54SHE MUMBLES
0:02:54 > 0:02:55Sorry.
0:02:55 > 0:02:58She said, "ahahaha ahahaha."
0:02:58 > 0:03:02- So it has happened before.- Yeah. Kind of, but not like this.- OK.
0:03:02 > 0:03:07Holly's floppy chops might look funny but they're no laughing matter.
0:03:07 > 0:03:12It can be quite serious because you can't eat, you can't really drink
0:03:12 > 0:03:16and you get dehydrated, but again it's quite painful as well.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18Fortunately, Dr Ejiro has a plan
0:03:18 > 0:03:22that draws on the latest cutting edge technology.
0:03:22 > 0:03:28She's going to stuff Holly's mouth with small splints that look a bit like lolly sticks.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31It might seem bizarre but there's method in her madness.
0:03:32 > 0:03:34I don't want it to hurt.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37By keeping Holly's mouth wedged open with wood
0:03:37 > 0:03:43the jaw muscles will get tired, unlock and allow the doctor to click her laughing gear back into place.
0:03:43 > 0:03:45INDISTINCT
0:03:45 > 0:03:47- Feel's fine?- Uh-uh.
0:03:47 > 0:03:50Feels funny? Yeah, it usually does...
0:03:50 > 0:03:53Actually, I can get one more in...
0:03:53 > 0:03:55Stay like that.
0:03:57 > 0:04:03That's a jaw dropping 26 little lolly sticks holding Holly's mouth open.
0:04:05 > 0:04:10All Holly has to do now is wait for the wooden sticks to work their magic.
0:04:10 > 0:04:14# Cos they're tired of, tired of hanging around
0:04:14 > 0:04:19# Yes, they're tired of, tired of hanging around
0:04:19 > 0:04:21# Yes, they're tired of tired of... #
0:04:25 > 0:04:28Time to see if jamming Holly full of lollies has done the job.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30There's only two rules for this...
0:04:30 > 0:04:34One is that you relax and two is that you don't bite me...that's it.
0:04:34 > 0:04:40As Dr Ejiro manoeuvres the mouth, there's a chance Holly's gnashers will clamp down hard on her hand.
0:04:41 > 0:04:45Relax, close your mouth.
0:04:47 > 0:04:50That's it, bite down. Finished.
0:04:50 > 0:04:54The doctor's digits are safe and Holly's jaw is back where it should be.
0:04:54 > 0:04:58- Was it painful? - No, it just aches a bit.
0:04:58 > 0:05:01It will do because it's been out of joint for a little while.
0:05:01 > 0:05:06I would avoid yawning too wide and anything like that because it's a bit unstable at the moment.
0:05:06 > 0:05:10Now that Holly can close her cakehole, it's time to head home
0:05:10 > 0:05:14and she's even got a souvenir of splints for the mantle.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17Honestly, the things people will do to get out of double politics.
0:05:23 > 0:05:27One of modern medicine's most perplexing mysteries is the yawn.
0:05:27 > 0:05:31The average person will yawn a quarter of a million times
0:05:31 > 0:05:34in their life, but no-one really knows why.
0:05:34 > 0:05:38What we do know is that yawning and stretching at the same time
0:05:38 > 0:05:41is known as pandiculation.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43If you're yawning while watching this
0:05:43 > 0:05:46it's because yawning is contagious.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49We yawn in the womb as early as 11 weeks...
0:05:49 > 0:05:54no surprise given the number of limited activities available to a foetus.
0:05:54 > 0:05:59But that assumes yawning is caused by boredom, which may not be true.
0:05:59 > 0:06:02Whilst some believe we yawn to stretch our lungs and make us
0:06:02 > 0:06:06more alert, others think it's all about cooling down the brain.
0:06:06 > 0:06:09Another theory is that yawning has a social function,
0:06:09 > 0:06:13as its contagiousness helps communities to synchronise their sleep patterns.
0:06:13 > 0:06:19Others think that yawning is an aggressive signal as observed in both baboons and goldfish.
0:06:19 > 0:06:25Believe it or not some people also yawn when sexually aroused.
0:06:25 > 0:06:28So next time your dinner date opens wide and lets out a groan,
0:06:28 > 0:06:31bear in mind that you might be making them stiff
0:06:31 > 0:06:33rather than boring them stiff.
0:06:39 > 0:06:43Next we're heading to Bradford where theatre nurse Carole Brown
0:06:43 > 0:06:47is proving that even the staff sometimes fall victim to an extraordinary emergency.
0:06:47 > 0:06:51She's been sent down from surgery with a very peculiar protrusion.
0:06:56 > 0:06:58Nurse Yasser Arafat (yes, really),
0:06:58 > 0:07:02has the job of assessing Carole's colossal kisser.
0:07:02 > 0:07:05- What's happened then? - I woke up this morning, but it was only in this corner,
0:07:05 > 0:07:08just slightly swollen, it's got bigger as the morning's progressed.
0:07:08 > 0:07:13- You'd no swelling there last night?- No, but last night I had a slight nick in the corner of my lip
0:07:13 > 0:07:17and I went into a bit of a cleaning frenzy at home last night and I was using disinfectants,
0:07:17 > 0:07:21so whether I've got something on my hands and I've touched my lip. That's all I can think of.
0:07:21 > 0:07:24I'm growing a beak. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
0:07:24 > 0:07:28Luckily Yasser has a tried and tested method for curing bizarre beaks.
0:07:28 > 0:07:32I think we'll give you an injection in your bottom lip to match it up, then you can go home!
0:07:32 > 0:07:35Yeah, right! I'll look like Mick Jagger then.
0:07:35 > 0:07:38Nip you with a bit of cleaner, once it's swollen up you can go home!
0:07:38 > 0:07:41Despite the banter Yasser has a genuine concern.
0:07:41 > 0:07:47Carol's trout pout is still growing and allergies can be deadly serious.
0:07:49 > 0:07:53Yasser sends our lippy lady off to see Associate Specialist Dr Akhtar.
0:07:53 > 0:07:55There are two types of reaction.
0:07:55 > 0:07:59One is a localised allergic reaction but there's another type called anaphylactic reaction,
0:07:59 > 0:08:03which is a generalised vaccine which is potentially a fatal reaction.
0:08:03 > 0:08:05Dr Akhtar gives Carole a thorough check up.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07He measures her heart rate,
0:08:07 > 0:08:11listens to her breathing for any signs of spasms in the airway,
0:08:11 > 0:08:15and finally checks for any swelling that might obstruct her throat.
0:08:15 > 0:08:20- The good news is it's not an anaphylactic reaction.- Right.
0:08:20 > 0:08:22The most important thing is we need to stop it getting worse
0:08:22 > 0:08:24- and make sure it doesn't impinge on the airways.- OK.
0:08:26 > 0:08:32Carole's handed a stack of steroids to push past her pout in the hope they'll reduce the swelling
0:08:32 > 0:08:36before baring her bum for a bumper injection of antihistamine
0:08:36 > 0:08:38to combat the allergic reaction.
0:08:38 > 0:08:40Wow, that stings. Aarrgh.
0:08:40 > 0:08:45Then it's just a waiting game to see how Carole reacts to the treatment.
0:08:45 > 0:08:46Dear, dear.
0:08:48 > 0:08:53Two hours later the supersize smackers haven't subsided
0:08:53 > 0:08:56and Carole's considering a new career.
0:08:56 > 0:09:00I'll just grow a hump and a club foot and just call me Igor. Ha-ha.
0:09:00 > 0:09:04Dr Akhtar's back to see Igor - sorry, Carole,
0:09:04 > 0:09:10although her massive mush shows no sign of deflating he's happy that her health's not at risk.
0:09:10 > 0:09:14There's no sign of the airways being compromised, so I think it's safe for you to go home.
0:09:14 > 0:09:18If at any stage you feel shortness of breath at all, please come back to us immediately.
0:09:18 > 0:09:20- Thanks very much.- OK, bye-bye.
0:09:20 > 0:09:25Carole puckers up and heads home, where we hope she'll be steering clear of the cleaning products.
0:09:25 > 0:09:26Bye!
0:09:30 > 0:09:33Two weeks later and Carole's back where she belongs,
0:09:33 > 0:09:35scrubbing up in the operating theatre.
0:09:35 > 0:09:40But is that mask still hiding extra large lips?
0:09:42 > 0:09:44Back to normal...yay.
0:09:49 > 0:09:55Every hobby comes with its hazards, but you don't expect to forsake your fingers for your favourite pastime.
0:09:55 > 0:10:00Unfortunately that's just what's happened to Don Smith.
0:10:00 > 0:10:03Don's arrived at Northampton General A&E
0:10:03 > 0:10:07with one of the goriest injuries in Bizarre ER's history.
0:10:07 > 0:10:09Whoa. OK.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12If you're at all squeamish, look away now!
0:10:17 > 0:10:21Model plane enthusiast Don was on an afternoon out
0:10:21 > 0:10:23with his latest flying machine.
0:10:23 > 0:10:26With a 60cc motor and 16 inch steel propellers,
0:10:26 > 0:10:30his new not-so-dinky dive bomber was more powerful
0:10:30 > 0:10:34and potentially devastating than your average chainsaw.
0:10:34 > 0:10:35Right, chocks away.
0:10:35 > 0:10:39Don fired her up with a sharp tug on the hand held pull chord
0:10:39 > 0:10:42but the rotating rotor sucked up the string
0:10:42 > 0:10:44pulling Don's hand into the spinning blades
0:10:44 > 0:10:46and pulverising his paw.
0:10:46 > 0:10:49With blood spurting from an artery and his mitt an almighty mess,
0:10:49 > 0:10:52Don couldn't tell he was missing a digit.
0:10:52 > 0:10:55- At least I'm not missing a digit. - He wrapped his hand in a towel,
0:10:55 > 0:10:59made an emergency landing in A&E and left his poor little pinkie behind.
0:10:59 > 0:11:01Don't leave me!
0:11:04 > 0:11:08It's hurting quite a lot now and it don't look very good.
0:11:08 > 0:11:11The doctor gives Don a local anaesthetic,
0:11:11 > 0:11:14and although the jabs are clearly painful,
0:11:14 > 0:11:18our incredibly brave patient takes it all in his stride.
0:11:18 > 0:11:21Sorry. Sorry.
0:11:22 > 0:11:25After no less than ten excruciating injections
0:11:25 > 0:11:26and with his wound now dressed,
0:11:26 > 0:11:30Don's family is on hand with some words of sympathy and support.
0:11:30 > 0:11:34Can't you take up something less hassle, like?
0:11:34 > 0:11:37Like knitting.
0:11:37 > 0:11:40The jokes might be keeping Don's spirits up,
0:11:40 > 0:11:45but they're not doing much for his mangled mitt which needs urgent specialist care.
0:11:45 > 0:11:49Unfortunately the plastic surgeon's at Northampton are unavailable.
0:11:49 > 0:11:56The medical team have no option but to rush Don to the nearest hospital that does have surgeons on hand.
0:11:56 > 0:11:59- We're going to move you to Leicester. - Are you?
0:11:59 > 0:12:03Every second counts in the dash to save Don's digits
0:12:03 > 0:12:08and he's quickly whisked away to Leicester Royal Infirmary,
0:12:08 > 0:12:12where a crack team of surgeons are on standby.
0:12:12 > 0:12:17Join us later in the show when we find out if medics can save what's left of Don's fingers.
0:12:24 > 0:12:29This series we've gone global to bring you the most bizarre accidents and emergencies on the planet.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35On a break to the Big Apple, one couple's dream holiday
0:12:35 > 0:12:39turned into a living nightmare when they contracted a deadly disease
0:12:39 > 0:12:43that you might think had been consigned to the history books...
0:12:43 > 0:12:44Black Death.
0:12:51 > 0:12:55I had never seen a case, nor seriously entertained the possibility of a case.
0:12:55 > 0:13:00I didn't think we were going to save this fellow. I thought he was doomed.
0:13:00 > 0:13:05Nobody really believes they're going to get the Black Death.
0:13:08 > 0:13:13Just after Hallowe'en 2002, married couple John Tull and Lucinda Marker
0:13:13 > 0:13:16were enjoying a juicy holiday in the Big Apple.
0:13:16 > 0:13:21We both love New York, we were out on the town having some drinks and martinis.
0:13:21 > 0:13:24Go to the theatre, go to museums.
0:13:24 > 0:13:28Eating in good restaurants. We were just having a blast.
0:13:28 > 0:13:32After just two days, they awoke feeling strangely under the weather.
0:13:32 > 0:13:38Totally exhausted. We had cramps, headaches, we were nauseated.
0:13:38 > 0:13:42They put their raised temperatures down to a touch of 'flu
0:13:42 > 0:13:44but then, resting in bed,
0:13:44 > 0:13:47they discovered strange lumps in their groins.
0:13:47 > 0:13:51There was a swelling, when I would get up to go the bathroom
0:13:51 > 0:13:54I was limping and it started to get more and more painful.
0:13:54 > 0:13:58The dream trip to New York was fast turning into a medieval nightmare.
0:14:00 > 0:14:05They limped into a taxi to visit top travel medicine specialist Dr Ronald Primas.
0:14:05 > 0:14:09He was shocked at John's terrible condition.
0:14:09 > 0:14:11He laid right here on the floor, couldn't even walk any more.
0:14:11 > 0:14:14His blood pressure was quite low, his pulse rate was very fast.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16I know our temperatures were very high.
0:14:16 > 0:14:20He was sweating profusely, he was beefy red.
0:14:20 > 0:14:22- Don was 105.- His shirt was soaked.
0:14:22 > 0:14:28- Mine was 102 or 3.- Lucinda was pretty flushed and red and very unwell.
0:14:28 > 0:14:32Doctors don't scare easily, but when he examined Lucinda,
0:14:32 > 0:14:35Dr Primas found something truly alarming.
0:14:35 > 0:14:38Usually lymph nodes are about that big.
0:14:38 > 0:14:40Her lymph node was about that big.
0:14:40 > 0:14:45Dr Primas had never seen anything like it, except in a medical text book.
0:14:45 > 0:14:48Lucinda had a classic plague bubo.
0:14:48 > 0:14:51If the bubo explodes and all this pus and gunk comes out,
0:14:51 > 0:14:55then it's highly contagious and can infect many, many people.
0:14:57 > 0:15:01In the 14th Century, Bubonic Plague wiped out millions,
0:15:01 > 0:15:04killing a third of the population of Europe.
0:15:04 > 0:15:06It became known as the Black Death.
0:15:08 > 0:15:13Plague doctors sealed themselves in 14th Century biohazard suits.
0:15:13 > 0:15:16The long nose stuffed with fragrant herbs,
0:15:16 > 0:15:19they tended the sick, the sick died.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23Actually the first thing I thought was, "are they contagious?"
0:15:23 > 0:15:24cos I don't want to get it.
0:15:24 > 0:15:29I just could not believe that we really had the plague.
0:15:31 > 0:15:37John and Lucinda sped off to hospital in a taxi, taking their killer germs on a tour of New York.
0:15:37 > 0:15:42John became disorientated and was declining fast.
0:15:42 > 0:15:46I was in the back seat of the cab, dying.
0:15:46 > 0:15:50Arriving at the hospital caused panic.
0:15:50 > 0:15:54We went into the desk and they went nuts...they went crazy.
0:15:54 > 0:15:59Blood samples were taken to look for the cause of all this medieval mayhem.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01The bacterium Yersinia pestis.
0:16:01 > 0:16:04It turns out they brought it with them.
0:16:08 > 0:16:12John and Lucinda live over 1,700 miles away from New York
0:16:12 > 0:16:15on this five acre ranch in rural New Mexico
0:16:15 > 0:16:18where they love to hike in the mountains.
0:16:18 > 0:16:24The weekend before we went on the trip, we climbed a 12,000 foot peak.
0:16:24 > 0:16:28The plague does survive here naturally on wood rats,
0:16:28 > 0:16:34so on their walk they must have been bitten by a tiny plague-carrying blood-sucking flea.
0:16:36 > 0:16:41At the Manhattan hospital this ancient disease met its modern enemy...
0:16:41 > 0:16:44antibiotics.
0:16:44 > 0:16:49I believe I was getting better the moment I started receiving the antibiotics.
0:16:49 > 0:16:54Bizarrely while Lucinda rallied, John continued his deathly downward spiral.
0:16:54 > 0:16:58He had organ failure of most of his organs
0:16:58 > 0:17:00and this easily could have killed him.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03Doctors had to take drastic action.
0:17:03 > 0:17:05They plunged John into an induced coma,
0:17:05 > 0:17:10slowing his body to a near stop to halt the spread of the disease.
0:17:10 > 0:17:15Despite this, John developed disseminated intravascular coagulation.
0:17:15 > 0:17:21Where clumps of cells block blood flow, causing skin, muscle and bone to die.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24His hands and feet turned purple.
0:17:24 > 0:17:28And this ran from his feet up his legs to his groin.
0:17:28 > 0:17:34Dr Perlman battled the infections with a complex cocktail of antibiotics.
0:17:34 > 0:17:37His hands regained their warmth and their normal colour
0:17:37 > 0:17:41and then their function, but his feet unfortunately did not.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46Plague was now joined by his old partner in death...
0:17:46 > 0:17:48gangrene.
0:17:48 > 0:17:53Gangrene is the death of cells and tissue from a lack of blood flow.
0:17:53 > 0:17:57John's feet became blackened and dead.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00When they talk about Black Death, that's what this is referring to.
0:18:00 > 0:18:05No longer able to fight infection John's feet were killing him.
0:18:05 > 0:18:10Could they be saved, or would vascular surgeon Dr Mike Soleyn have to amputate them?
0:18:10 > 0:18:14You didn't need a vascular surgeon to know that these feet were dead.
0:18:14 > 0:18:16I'm not even sure you needed a doctor.
0:18:16 > 0:18:22As Thanksgiving arrived doctors took the drastic decision to amputate John's feet.
0:18:22 > 0:18:25It's just chopped straight through both legs.
0:18:25 > 0:18:28Without the amputation he would have died.
0:18:28 > 0:18:32They didn't even truly think that that would save him,
0:18:32 > 0:18:35but they thought it was the one chance they had.
0:18:36 > 0:18:42The gamble paid off. Amputation plus medication saved John's life.
0:18:42 > 0:18:46He was still in a coma but his body was slowly starting to recover.
0:18:46 > 0:18:51All told, his medically induced deep sleep lasted three months.
0:18:51 > 0:18:55What happened to Thanksgiving?
0:18:55 > 0:18:57What happened to Christmas?
0:18:57 > 0:18:59What happened to New Year's Eve?
0:18:59 > 0:19:02How can it be January 15th?
0:19:02 > 0:19:06That really freaked me out.
0:19:08 > 0:19:12John may have lost his feet but he hasn't lost his zest for life.
0:19:12 > 0:19:15Many months of intense physiotherapy and hard work
0:19:15 > 0:19:17mean John has his life back.
0:19:17 > 0:19:20After a couple of years I could walk, I could drive,
0:19:20 > 0:19:21I could fly airplanes...
0:19:21 > 0:19:26I could do just about anything anybody else could do.
0:19:26 > 0:19:29I'm not happy that his feet didn't get better,
0:19:29 > 0:19:31but very happy that the rest of him did
0:19:31 > 0:19:35and that he's been able to resume a functional and happy life.
0:19:35 > 0:19:41We've survived one of the most terrifying diseases in the history of mankind.
0:19:41 > 0:19:43I would say things are going pretty well.
0:19:43 > 0:19:45I'm delighted with the outcome.
0:19:45 > 0:19:51I believe that I'm one of the luckiest men on earth.
0:19:51 > 0:19:52As for the plague,
0:19:52 > 0:19:57it too is alive and well. Out there somewhere...waiting...
0:19:57 > 0:19:58just patiently waiting.
0:20:04 > 0:20:07Catching plague might not be something we worry about today,
0:20:07 > 0:20:11but back in the Middle Ages it was one of many Medieval menaces
0:20:11 > 0:20:12that might finish you off.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15Alongside Black Death, Leprosy was rife
0:20:15 > 0:20:18although it didn't make your bits and bobs drop off
0:20:18 > 0:20:21it did however cause super scaley skin lesions
0:20:21 > 0:20:24before attacking your nervous system over 20 years,
0:20:24 > 0:20:28ultimately causing gangrene and death.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30And then there was ergotism,
0:20:30 > 0:20:34the olde worlde ailment that led to vomiting, gangrene,
0:20:34 > 0:20:37mania and hallucinations.
0:20:37 > 0:20:40It was caused by fungal poisoning of rye
0:20:40 > 0:20:44which possibly makes it history's most prolific cereal killer.
0:20:45 > 0:20:49A medieval medic was more likely to make you worse rather than better.
0:20:49 > 0:20:52The mentally ill was prescribed a date with Dr Drill,
0:20:52 > 0:20:54the theory being that boring holes in the skull
0:20:54 > 0:20:56or trepanning as it was called,
0:20:56 > 0:20:59would allow evil spirits to escape.
0:20:59 > 0:21:00That's better.
0:21:00 > 0:21:02And if the hole in your head didn't help,
0:21:02 > 0:21:04doctors were just as keen on the hole in your bottom.
0:21:04 > 0:21:08Pumping potions up patient's using instruments called clysters.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12No wonder most people preferred the more bizarre
0:21:12 > 0:21:15but often less painful remedies of the day.
0:21:15 > 0:21:18A touch deaf? I said a touch deaf?
0:21:18 > 0:21:21Then mix the gall of a hare with the grease of a fox
0:21:21 > 0:21:24and drop it down your lughole.
0:21:24 > 0:21:26And those of you with a touch of gout
0:21:26 > 0:21:31should boil a red haired dog in oil, add worms, marrow and herbs,
0:21:31 > 0:21:35leave to simmer for 20 minutes and then rub the mixture in.
0:21:35 > 0:21:38It may not cure you but the scalding sensation
0:21:38 > 0:21:40should certainly take your mind off the gout.
0:21:44 > 0:21:48Earlier in the show we met model plane enthusiast Don,
0:21:48 > 0:21:50who came to Northampton General A&E
0:21:50 > 0:21:55after one of his mini machines made a hash of his hand.
0:21:55 > 0:21:57Eager to make a good fist of the damaged digits,
0:21:57 > 0:22:01medics referred Don to a specialist team at Leicester Royal Infirmary,
0:22:01 > 0:22:05headed by micro surgeon Chris Milner who's received Don's notes
0:22:05 > 0:22:08and is ready to welcome the patient on board.
0:22:08 > 0:22:10- Mr Smith.- How are you? Pleased to meet you.
0:22:10 > 0:22:12I'm Chris Milner, one of the doctor in plastics here.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15I want to have a quick look, see what we're dealing with.
0:22:15 > 0:22:18- I don't know what's necessarily under there.- It's not very nice.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22Can you cross these two fingers for good luck?
0:22:22 > 0:22:25Excellent, all right, that's really good. Relax.
0:22:25 > 0:22:30And as if Don's day hasn't gone badly enough there's more gruelling news just in.
0:22:30 > 0:22:36Instead of putting me to sleep they're going to put injections into my arms to make it dead
0:22:36 > 0:22:39and then I'll be awake while it's being done.
0:22:39 > 0:22:44Using ultrasound, the anaesthetist locates the nerves she needs to numb Don's arm,
0:22:44 > 0:22:48and having already endured ten injections today,
0:22:48 > 0:22:50Don's skewered with yet another needle.
0:22:53 > 0:22:57While the following operation is an incredible sight, it's also pretty gruesome,
0:22:57 > 0:23:01so this could be the moment for squeamish viewers to nip out for a chocolate finger.
0:23:04 > 0:23:09Mr Milner begins by poking around in the palm slashed open by high speed propellers.
0:23:11 > 0:23:16The task of stitching up these three nasty slashes is so devilishly detailed
0:23:16 > 0:23:21that Mr Milner needs to wear special specs that magnify his vision
0:23:21 > 0:23:24by three ½ times to mend muscle, nerve and tendon.
0:23:27 > 0:23:31So we've got some forceps here. Their tips are very small,
0:23:31 > 0:23:34and if you can make that out this is actually the thread that we use.
0:23:34 > 0:23:38It's about the thickness of a human hair. You're quite lucky, actually,
0:23:38 > 0:23:42the blades haven't gone down so deep as to cut the nerves.
0:23:42 > 0:23:46With the palm patched up, attention turns to the decimated digits.
0:23:46 > 0:23:50Mr Milner begins with the little finger.
0:23:50 > 0:23:53Tidying the tendon and burning nerve endings.
0:23:53 > 0:23:54If you don't do that,
0:23:54 > 0:23:57then at this point of the tip of the amputated stump,
0:23:57 > 0:24:00it will be extremely sensitive and tender.
0:24:00 > 0:24:04As most of the finger is missing, all the surgeon can do
0:24:04 > 0:24:07is sew the skin together to form a little stump.
0:24:08 > 0:24:14And don't forget, throughout all this Don's still wide awake and even finding time to have a natter.
0:24:14 > 0:24:16That one's just got a cut there and a cut there,
0:24:16 > 0:24:19so that's just going to be a bit of suturing there.
0:24:19 > 0:24:21While Don charms the staff,
0:24:21 > 0:24:23Mr Milner moves on to repairing the ring finger.
0:24:23 > 0:24:27He can't fix it fully and so first chops off the dangling tip.
0:24:27 > 0:24:29I'm happy in my work,
0:24:29 > 0:24:30very happy in my work.
0:24:30 > 0:24:33To ensure Don has a neat round stump,
0:24:33 > 0:24:37the bone needs to be clipped back before stitching can begin
0:24:37 > 0:24:40and the tool used has a fittingly gruesome name...
0:24:40 > 0:24:42it's a bone nibbler.
0:24:47 > 0:24:50While surgeons nibble at his knuckles,
0:24:50 > 0:24:52Don's still single handedly working the room.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55With the ring finger all sewn up,
0:24:55 > 0:24:59Mr Milner moves to the middle digit which has got off lightly.
0:24:59 > 0:25:04After a quick clean and a stitch, it's on to the final finger.
0:25:04 > 0:25:06The gnarled up nail's removed,
0:25:06 > 0:25:11a silicon splint put in place and Mr Milner's work is done.
0:25:11 > 0:25:16All that's left is for Don to get a look at the surgeon's truly remarkable handiwork.
0:25:16 > 0:25:19Now then, these are the cuts in your hand
0:25:19 > 0:25:23so they've all been cleaned and closed with stitches.
0:25:23 > 0:25:27This is your little finger, this is your ring, you've got good function here...
0:25:27 > 0:25:31that finger's just had the pulp closed on the surface
0:25:31 > 0:25:34and you've got a nail bed repair on this finger.
0:25:34 > 0:25:38Your thumb's gloriously untouched, and that's it.
0:25:38 > 0:25:42It's a resounding thumbs up from Don.
0:25:42 > 0:25:45- Thank you very much, everybody. - See you later.
0:25:45 > 0:25:47Good job done in a short time
0:25:47 > 0:25:49and it feels good
0:25:49 > 0:25:54and my finger's are straight, although there's a few missing...
0:25:54 > 0:25:56it's OK.
0:25:56 > 0:26:01# Put your hands up Put your hands up. #
0:26:03 > 0:26:07It's two week's later and Don's checking in to his local doctor's surgery
0:26:07 > 0:26:12where he'll find out how his hand is healing and have his stitches removed.
0:26:12 > 0:26:18Practice nurse Emily Long undresses Don so he can get a good look at his healing hand.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20Not looking too bad at all is it.
0:26:20 > 0:26:23No. It feels really strange, like.
0:26:25 > 0:26:29With the hand still swollen, removing this many stitches
0:26:29 > 0:26:33is tricky and painful but our plucky pilot remains brave as ever.
0:26:35 > 0:26:37It's really tender, that is.
0:26:37 > 0:26:41Don seems to be getting to grips with his new condition,
0:26:41 > 0:26:43as well as a new set of nicknames.
0:26:43 > 0:26:47Most people who know me now call me fingers...
0:26:47 > 0:26:50I expect to have a few names, I suppose, called now,
0:26:50 > 0:26:52like idiot.
0:26:53 > 0:26:57After a half hour of painstaking plucking all the stitches are out.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00That's it, all finished.
0:27:00 > 0:27:04Has Don's unfortunate run in with a rotor put him off his precious planes?
0:27:04 > 0:27:08I suppose I should be in a little bit of difficulty
0:27:08 > 0:27:14trying to hold the transmitter which is what flies the airplane, but I'll get used to it.
0:27:14 > 0:27:16I'll work my way round it somehow.
0:27:16 > 0:27:19- Thank you very much.- Thank you.
0:27:19 > 0:27:21Come again if I get a kiss.
0:27:21 > 0:27:26Don's cleared for take off and he's winging his way home...
0:27:26 > 0:27:29just keep those paws away from the propellers in future, eh, Don.
0:27:35 > 0:27:41Next time on Bizarre ER, medics reel in a curious catch of the day.
0:27:42 > 0:27:45An eye popping injury arrives in casualty.
0:27:45 > 0:27:48This is just so bizarre, really.
0:27:48 > 0:27:52And we head down under for the amazing story of how one woman
0:27:52 > 0:27:55was nearly crushed to death by a leaping dolphin.
0:27:55 > 0:27:59If I didn't do the right thing, she would die.
0:28:09 > 0:28:12Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:28:12 > 0:28:15E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk