Me, My Spots and I

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:00:00. > :00:07.Hey everyone, so I am Katie Snooks and you can normally find me here.

:00:08. > :00:09.I've suffered with acne for the last decade and honestly,

:00:10. > :00:12.it has controlled every single aspect of my life from my

:00:13. > :00:21.social life, dating, and also my self-confidence.

:00:22. > :00:24.I don't feel beautiful at all, my confidence is really low today.

:00:25. > :00:39.Until recently I finally had success.

:00:40. > :00:41.I have spent the last eight months vlogging my journey taking

:00:42. > :00:43.the sometimes controversial drug isotretinoin, more commonly

:00:44. > :00:49.The success rate is high but it's also hard to get.

:00:50. > :00:53.You can't get it from your GP and it took me a couple of years to get

:00:54. > :00:58.I recently finished my treatment and I just uploaded my last skin

:00:59. > :01:02.update on my Youtube channel and the transformation in my skin

:01:03. > :01:16.So I finally found a drug that cleared my skin but I want to know

:01:17. > :01:18.how other people deal with their acne but not just

:01:19. > :01:21.the treatments but how they deal with the emotional side,

:01:22. > :01:30.the self-confidence and the way you feel about being you.

:01:31. > :01:32.Time to catch a train, I'm off to Edinburgh.

:01:33. > :01:36.Libby and Lauren are taking me on a night out.

:01:37. > :01:38.Libby's tried roaccutane three times without success so now she's trying

:01:39. > :01:48.So the first time I went on it, it totally cleared up

:01:49. > :01:55.And then it just came back all of it, and I feel like it came

:01:56. > :01:59.You so you lived with perfect skin for a whole year?

:02:00. > :02:02.I wouldn't say perfect, I still had scarring from obviously

:02:03. > :02:04.the spots before but I was happy with my skin and that's

:02:05. > :02:08.like the only time in about eight years that I have actually been

:02:09. > :02:12.You are trying a new treatment now, can you tell me a bit about that?

:02:13. > :02:16.So it's a suction and laser treatment and they go

:02:17. > :02:18.around your skin and they suck the bacteria out and zap it

:02:19. > :02:24.with a laser to kill any leftover bacteria.

:02:25. > :02:26.What's the first step in your make-up regime?

:02:27. > :02:28.I always start with covering the majority of the redness with

:02:29. > :02:38."This is BBC Radio 1, Saturday night, this is Danny Howard,

:02:39. > :02:42.a big shoutout to the girls getting ready for a massive

:02:43. > :03:02.Libby's training to be a beauty therapist and she says nights out

:03:03. > :03:05.like this are one of the times she feels most self-conscious

:03:06. > :03:08.You feel like the odd one out, like you stick

:03:09. > :03:12.Also I feel like sort of through the night

:03:13. > :03:14.like your make-up comes off, as well, like it's not as nice

:03:15. > :03:20.Do you feel like you completely let go on a night out regardless of how

:03:21. > :03:22.you're feeling about yourself at that particular time?

:03:23. > :03:32.If I have had enough drink, then yeah, but if I have not..

:03:33. > :03:36.I am with my friends and trying to enjoy myself.

:03:37. > :03:39.When I have a problem about anything I can always go to them,

:03:40. > :03:41.they're so nice about it, I love them.

:03:42. > :03:45.Do you feel like Libby at any point gets jealous of you and the friends

:03:46. > :03:47.that don't have acne and have never really suffered with it?

:03:48. > :03:52.I wouldn't say so, Libby's not like a jealous person,

:03:53. > :03:54.I do see she is not confident in her of herself

:03:55. > :04:02.Do you think her acne has held her back with dating

:04:03. > :04:09.As far as I have known her it's been school since we started there she's,

:04:10. > :04:13.I have never known her to have a boyfriend.

:04:14. > :04:16.Which is a real shame because there are so many other

:04:17. > :04:20.She's had acne the whole time you have known her.

:04:21. > :04:23.Never known her without and I just hope something does happen

:04:24. > :04:25.for her that she can gain her confidence back.

:04:26. > :04:30.She's not really dated many guys since I have been friends with her.

:04:31. > :04:32.Do you think that could be because of that?

:04:33. > :04:36.If Libby never looked good before she went out she wouldn't go.

:04:37. > :04:38.She would be like, I am not going out.

:04:39. > :04:41.Do you think her confidence has been affected by having acne?

:04:42. > :04:43.Sometimes we have to come in the morning without any make-up

:04:44. > :04:49.on and I think Libby is quite self-conscious coming out into

:04:50. > :04:50.college with absolutely no make-up on.

:04:51. > :04:56.If you are giving someone a facial with great skin

:04:57. > :05:03.but you have not great skin, so yeah definitely.

:05:04. > :05:05.So, it's been lovely to spend the evening

:05:06. > :05:08.with you and after spending the last couple of hours with you and your

:05:09. > :05:10.friends I've been thinking are you kind of pinning

:05:11. > :05:19.all your hopes on this current treatment that you're on?

:05:20. > :05:22.Yeah, I'd say I am just because the amount of money

:05:23. > :05:24.I've paid towards it, it's like my own savings

:05:25. > :05:28.But if it doesn't work, it doesn't work and I'll try something new.

:05:29. > :05:30.Hopefully not as expensive but I have noticed a difference

:05:31. > :05:39.in my skin and I have only had two treatments, so fingers crossed.

:05:40. > :05:43.It was lovely to meet Libby, but after meeting her it really

:05:44. > :05:46.dawned on me just how much she's spending on this acne treatment,

:05:47. > :05:49.it's costing her ?600 and that's on top of all the make-up she's

:05:50. > :05:57.I can relate to her so much and I really know how it feels

:05:58. > :05:59.to pin all your hopes on one acne treatment.

:06:00. > :06:07.I've taken one pill so it's kind of the first day but nothing's

:06:08. > :06:21.I'm very worried about these big ones all coming at the same time.

:06:22. > :06:23.That will be very painful and very unattractive.

:06:24. > :06:27.Day 18, I wasn't going to film today because I didn't feel like it

:06:28. > :06:30.but I thought I would be completely honest and show you guys.

:06:31. > :06:34.My skin hasn't been this bad in a really long time.

:06:35. > :06:41.I put so much hope and so much faith into every single thing I tried

:06:42. > :06:49.for acne and when things didn't work it just crushed me even more.

:06:50. > :06:52.I'm wondering what are the other solutions available

:06:53. > :07:01.So I've come to meet one of the UK's leading dermatologists.

:07:02. > :07:09.I met Libby a few days ago and she's tried roaccutane three times and it

:07:10. > :07:13.hasn't worked for her and now she's paying her own money for a new light

:07:14. > :07:16.therapy treatment which she's kind of pinning all her last hopes on.

:07:17. > :07:18.I was wondering if there are any other treatments left available

:07:19. > :07:27.I wouldn't say there's anything imminent that's going to topple

:07:28. > :07:32.roaccutane off its perch but there are particularly

:07:33. > :07:34.light-based treatments now that seem to be gaining more evidence

:07:35. > :07:42.For Libby, I think getting support from consultant dermatologists,

:07:43. > :07:48.either privately, if it's not possible, because the NHS

:07:49. > :07:51.is so burdened, would probably at least make her feel more

:07:52. > :07:54.So I've just finished my course of roaccutane

:07:55. > :07:58.before I started I was googling it and researching it an awful lot.

:07:59. > :08:00.There are a lot of kind of controversial things about

:08:01. > :08:06.Well, roaccutane is an extremely strong

:08:07. > :08:10.medication for acne, and acne is not a life-threatening disease.

:08:11. > :08:17.So it's always a matter of balancing up the

:08:18. > :08:19.pros and cons, but it doesn't come without risks and it's understanding

:08:20. > :08:22.the risks, informing the patients of the risks so they can

:08:23. > :08:25.make their own decision, but it can be extremely

:08:26. > :08:27.effective for people who have severe and/or stubborn acne.

:08:28. > :08:30.It's understanding what the risks are.

:08:31. > :08:36.Someone who knows all about those risks is Jessica.

:08:37. > :08:39.I'm off to third wheel her date night with boyfriend Brendan.

:08:40. > :08:41.Jess hasn't used roaccutane because she's been diagnosed with

:08:42. > :08:50.Dermatologists say the side-effects range from dry lips to,

:08:51. > :08:53.much more rarely, kidney damage and even mental health problems.

:08:54. > :08:56.We met at my dad and my stepmum's wedding.

:08:57. > :09:10.So I'm 22 now, so kind of all started when I was about 12.

:09:11. > :09:12.I'd get, like, really bad whiteheads on

:09:13. > :09:15.my face and my friends were like, let me pop your spot and I'd be like

:09:16. > :09:19.And I think forget, like, the physical side of

:09:20. > :09:23.Kind of worse on my shoulders but it does go down my

:09:24. > :09:26.back as well, and I like to call it bacne.

:09:27. > :09:31.See, they don't look too inflamed at the moment.

:09:32. > :09:36.It looks like scarring, but it has been worse in the past?

:09:37. > :09:40.How about when you first met, was that kind of awkward?

:09:41. > :09:43.I think I was a bit embarrassed, and especially

:09:44. > :09:51.I kind of, like, made a joke out of it but I think it was...

:09:52. > :09:55.And do you have any ways in particular to make yourself feel

:09:56. > :09:58.better whilst you're, like, really suffering with acne?

:09:59. > :10:00.Just, like, having somebody, having your friends

:10:01. > :10:02.and family and just know that they're always there.

:10:03. > :10:04.None of my friends, my family, my boyfriend,

:10:05. > :10:08.So spending time with them, and I just

:10:09. > :10:09.make sure that I use, like, a moisturiser.

:10:10. > :10:21.So, I just wanted to talk a little bit about how, kind of,

:10:22. > :10:28.Jessica's acne has affected your relationship at all?

:10:29. > :10:32.She does have low confidence sometimes, especially

:10:33. > :10:35.when wearing tops where her back's revealed, because she feels quite

:10:36. > :10:38.Has it ever, like, caused any friction in your

:10:39. > :10:40.relationship, her low self-confidence, because of her

:10:41. > :10:44.I've always been able to kind of notice when Jess has been quite

:10:45. > :10:47.So when she's been quite quiet or quite upset,

:10:48. > :10:49.I've approached her and spoken to her about it.

:10:50. > :11:02.It was really lovely to meet Jessica last night,

:11:03. > :11:04.and although she is feeling confident and happy

:11:05. > :11:09.concerned because I know from experience that if you have acne,

:11:10. > :11:13.it's always there in the back of your mind, no matter how many

:11:14. > :11:15.kind of smiles you can put on for the

:11:16. > :11:23.Supposed to be going out tonight and now I just don't...

:11:24. > :11:27.Not only is it breaking out, it's also so itchy and

:11:28. > :11:35.It becomes really infuriating and frustrating when girls with clear

:11:36. > :11:38.skin on social media, especially some of the ones I follow on Twitter

:11:39. > :11:41.and Snapchat, they're like, oh, I've got a spot,

:11:42. > :11:48.And they've got the tiniest, tiniest little spot you can't even see.

:11:49. > :11:53.I've got something going on with my eyes,

:11:54. > :11:59.It makes me want to gouge my eyes out.

:12:00. > :12:06.She got in touch with us about her acne.

:12:07. > :12:08.She's suffered with it for an awful long time.

:12:09. > :12:11.And we're also going to be meeting her son

:12:12. > :12:15.I'm unsure about how much he's going to talk to

:12:16. > :12:18.us about it, but let's go and have a chat.

:12:19. > :12:23.So your mum got in touch with us about her acne.

:12:24. > :12:38.I mean I think it's quite good that you're doing a

:12:39. > :12:40.documentary, because everyone can understand what it's like.

:12:41. > :12:42.Almost everyone has or suffers with acne at

:12:43. > :12:45.But when you're going through it kind of

:12:46. > :12:47.almost feels like you're the only one.

:12:48. > :12:51.I look at myself in a mirror and think, yeah, this is worse

:12:52. > :12:54.Because I don't really see, I don't look at other people

:12:55. > :12:56.specifically, I kind of just criticise myself for it.

:12:57. > :13:02.You sometimes wear make-up to cover your acne, can you tell me a bit

:13:03. > :13:07.about that? It comes as a bit of a shock at first, people are like, are

:13:08. > :13:11.you wearing make-up? Then everybody realises, what is the difference?

:13:12. > :13:16.All the girls in my year slather themselves in make-up as soon as

:13:17. > :13:19.they get a spot, at this stage I was, I think everyone could

:13:20. > :13:26.empathise with me and see why I was doing this, because I was in such a

:13:27. > :13:32.bad point. It made you feel better? It did. I covered it up, when I

:13:33. > :13:36.looked in error I did not look atrocious, I looked normal. Do you

:13:37. > :13:40.have any pictures, would you me having a look?

:13:41. > :13:47.George is 15 and it takes him real guts to show me these pictures.

:13:48. > :13:53.These back on holiday. As you can see, I look pretty bad. That is not

:13:54. > :13:59.at my worst. He is now on roaccutane butchering the camera photos up when

:14:00. > :14:05.he was not is a step too far. -- but sharing the camera photos. It looks

:14:06. > :14:10.really painful, your entire face is covered with quite big... It was

:14:11. > :14:15.quite bad, it was not just on my face, it was my back, my neck.

:14:16. > :14:26.Getting to sleep was a struggle. I would have to deal with my face in

:14:27. > :14:28.the day and my back at night. I'm sorry to say this but it also... It

:14:29. > :14:31.almost makes you look like a different person because the cysts

:14:32. > :14:36.are so big they kind of distort your face. I was quite swollen as well.

:14:37. > :14:42.Thank you so much for sharing me these pictures and board talking to

:14:43. > :14:47.me today, you are super in inspiring. I thought me and George

:14:48. > :14:51.had a unique story, we both have acne, we both have acne, we're both

:14:52. > :14:55.on roaccutane. The bias is showing the world has acne at its worst is

:14:56. > :15:04.too much for George, his mother has had decades to grow in confidence.

:15:05. > :15:12.Oh, my gosh! That was pretty much rock bottom. That was horrendous.

:15:13. > :15:17.How did... When you woke up every day, what did... Literally every

:15:18. > :15:23.time I looked in the mirror it changed, it was like it was moving

:15:24. > :15:28.around. It got worse and worse. When George was nearing the age when you

:15:29. > :15:33.started to get it, were you worried? I always said as soon as they got

:15:34. > :15:39.spots they would go to the doctors. Did it make you feel guilty? No,

:15:40. > :15:43.just sad. I can feel guilty, I have done nothing wrong but I feel sad, I

:15:44. > :15:48.feel for George that he has had to go through this and he has dealt

:15:49. > :15:53.with it really, really well. He is a very resilient kids.

:15:54. > :15:57.Seeing acne that bad has really touched a nerve. I can remember

:15:58. > :16:03.exactly how I used to feel when mine was that bad and it just isn't fair.

:16:04. > :16:09.You just want someone that you feel like you can turn to land will have

:16:10. > :16:12.answers for you. But obviously it does not happen with everyone. I was

:16:13. > :16:18.lucky enough to have found a dermatologist I could connect with.

:16:19. > :16:22.It got me thinking about Jessica, she has not really nailed any

:16:23. > :16:29.solutions despite putting on a brave face, so I have decided to put into

:16:30. > :16:37.each with a doctor. -- put her in touch with. I thought I would tell

:16:38. > :16:43.you a bit about myself. I am 22, I have had acne for about ten years

:16:44. > :16:48.now. I saw a dermatologist and was offered roaccutane but we decided it

:16:49. > :16:54.was not the best thing for me, so I was wondering if there were any

:16:55. > :16:58.alternatives. Every patient is different, I am meeting you for the

:16:59. > :17:02.first time but roaccutane may be a treatment option for someone with

:17:03. > :17:07.your skin type, but it is not just your skin, it is the emotional side

:17:08. > :17:13.and anxiety. There are lots of options. Do you think there will

:17:14. > :17:17.ever be a cure for acne? In many patients, roaccutane or isotretinoin

:17:18. > :17:25.can cure the acne, turn it off and it does not come back, but not all.

:17:26. > :17:29.We always live in hope of a cure. I have heard things about diet, skin

:17:30. > :17:33.care, that that affects acne. Is there any truth behind that? Whether

:17:34. > :17:38.or not one develops acne is pretty much genetically determined, but

:17:39. > :17:44.there are outside factors. Stress can trigger it, you need strategies

:17:45. > :17:48.to manage it so that you feel happy that it is acceptable and you are

:17:49. > :17:52.coping with the condition rather than its ruining your life. Thank

:17:53. > :17:59.you for talking to me. That is what it is all about. You

:18:00. > :18:02.finding ways to deal with and cope with the acne, rather than its

:18:03. > :18:04.controlling every aspect of your life. Somehow you have to finds a

:18:05. > :18:08.way to stay positive. I am really, really happy

:18:09. > :18:12.with how my skin's looking. For the first time in a real long

:18:13. > :18:16.time I am just using like a stick concealer foundation which I've

:18:17. > :18:19.never been able to do before because my skin's

:18:20. > :18:21.always been so blemished. Still really happy

:18:22. > :18:24.with it apart from this, Today is my last ever

:18:25. > :18:30.day of roaccutane. I am the happiest I've

:18:31. > :18:34.ever been within myself for a really long time,

:18:35. > :18:37.like ten since since I have had acne and I couldn't be happier,

:18:38. > :18:40.yeah, this is my skin, But the up with thing I've

:18:41. > :18:48.learned is that your skin So whatever stage of your acne

:18:49. > :19:23.journey you are on, you have got I am a keen photographer, it is for

:19:24. > :19:28.my degree is in. I wanted to do something to help the people I have

:19:29. > :19:33.met feel better. What were your thoughts about chatting to doctor

:19:34. > :19:38.Tamara? I feel more confident about talking to my doctor about seeing a

:19:39. > :19:43.dermatologist, she put my mind at rest and I might go on Rocky Tain.

:19:44. > :19:47.It is good you spoke to her, you have not spoken to anybody about

:19:48. > :19:55.your acne for awhile. About four years, it was nice for her to put my

:19:56. > :20:01.mind at rest. Cute! Big smile. Do you guys have one

:20:02. > :20:06.thing that you would say this one suffering with acne? Go to the

:20:07. > :20:11.doctor, if the doctor does not give you the answer you want, go to

:20:12. > :20:16.another and keep asking, as for a referral to the dermatologist if the

:20:17. > :20:19.medication is not working. You are never alone, there is always yells

:20:20. > :20:21.out there suffering, try to find someone to talk to, even if they do

:20:22. > :20:37.not have acne. Don't pick your spots, it leaves you

:20:38. > :20:44.with so many scars. Every time I get a new spot, I don't judge. Locale

:20:45. > :20:52.beautiful that is. Thanks. Do you like it? Yes.

:20:53. > :20:55.It has been amazing to meet so many inspiring people along this acne

:20:56. > :20:59.journey, who all have great ways of dealing with their acne to make

:21:00. > :21:04.themselves feel better. You can talk to your doctor and see what

:21:05. > :21:08.treatments are available, you can visit a dermatologist, listen to

:21:09. > :21:11.their advice and take it in because they are the experts. Whatever stage

:21:12. > :21:13.of your acne journey, there are still ways to feel great about

:21:14. > :21:18.yourself.