Pennod 1

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0:00:00 > 0:00:00- Subtitles

0:00:00 > 0:00:02- Subtitles- - Subtitles

0:00:16 > 0:00:20- "Hey ho, hi-de ho! - I'm a gypsy on her way.

0:00:20 > 0:00:25- "Caravan in the shadow of a hill. - A new location every other day."

0:00:26 > 0:00:29- Come, join Jojo and me - on our journey...

0:00:29 > 0:00:31- ..as we embark on our holiday.

0:00:34 > 0:00:36- I don't know where we're going.

0:00:36 > 0:00:39- We'll simply follow our noses.

0:00:39 > 0:00:43- Who needs directions when you have - the breeze to guide you?

0:00:43 > 0:00:47- Mother Nature's map - and the stars' satnav.

0:00:48 > 0:00:50- Is everything ready, Jo Jo?

0:00:53 > 0:00:55- ****ing **it!

0:01:01 > 0:01:03- SNORING

0:01:30 > 0:01:33- This is my new aftershave range.

0:01:35 > 0:01:36- Obviously.

0:01:38 > 0:01:40- That's its name.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44- Obviously.

0:01:48 > 0:01:51- Obviously by Cameron Jenkins.

0:01:55 > 0:01:59- My Auntie Vicky has just come home - from her holidays.

0:01:59 > 0:02:01- She went to Ibiza.

0:02:02 > 0:02:04- Pah! Ibiza?

0:02:04 > 0:02:06- My brother...

0:02:08 > 0:02:11- My brother - is the best DJ in the world.

0:02:11 > 0:02:15- He DJs in Ibiza all the time. - He's the best.

0:02:17 > 0:02:18- My brother...

0:02:19 > 0:02:21- He told me - he saw your brother in Ibiza.

0:02:22 > 0:02:27- He was walking on the beach carrying - his tapes but he tripped and fell.

0:02:27 > 0:02:30- He smashed up all his tapes - and he cried.

0:02:30 > 0:02:31- No way.

0:02:31 > 0:02:33- No way.- - Yes way.

0:02:33 > 0:02:36- My brother DJs - in the best clubs in Ibiza.

0:02:36 > 0:02:39- Space, Privilege, - Cafe Mambo and Pacha.

0:02:40 > 0:02:43- He plays all the best records too.

0:02:43 > 0:02:46- David Guetta, Dimitri Vegas...

0:02:47 > 0:02:48- ..Alistair James...

0:02:49 > 0:02:51- ..Bryn Fon and Moniars.

0:02:53 > 0:02:54- Oh, wow! Amazing.

0:02:57 > 0:02:58- That didn't happen!

0:02:58 > 0:03:01- My brother - is the best DJ in the world.

0:03:01 > 0:03:06- He doesn't play in common Ibiza - clubs because he's too famous.

0:03:06 > 0:03:09- He has his own radio station - in America...

0:03:09 > 0:03:13- ..and it has - seven billion listeners every day.

0:03:13 > 0:03:16- He never plays any Moniars records.

0:03:19 > 0:03:22- Because he flies them - out to America...

0:03:22 > 0:03:25- ..to play live at his radio station.

0:03:27 > 0:03:31- And they stay in his mansion... - in one of his mansions.

0:03:35 > 0:03:38- Well, hello and welcome to Bwrlwm...

0:03:39 > 0:03:44- ..the brand new online show where - I welcome you to my busy home.

0:03:45 > 0:03:50- We'll have a get-together every week - and have a chat over a cup of tea...

0:03:50 > 0:03:51- ..or a Pinot Grigio.

0:03:52 > 0:03:55- A very warm welcome to Bwrlwm.

0:04:05 > 0:04:07- Come in.

0:04:07 > 0:04:10- Let me introduce you - to two of my best friends.

0:04:10 > 0:04:14- They'll join in the Bwrlwm fun - every week.

0:04:15 > 0:04:17- This is Esyllt Rhyd Rhychiog.

0:04:18 > 0:04:21- We've been friends - since our schooldays.

0:04:21 > 0:04:25- She's always taken a keen interest - in everything I do.

0:04:25 > 0:04:29- She's an enthusiastic member - of my cerdd dant choir...

0:04:29 > 0:04:31- ..and of my recitation party.

0:04:32 > 0:04:36- She grew up on a farm - called Rhyd Rhychiog, by the way...

0:04:36 > 0:04:40- ..in case you thought - her parents had lost the plot...

0:04:40 > 0:04:42- ..when they named her!

0:04:42 > 0:04:46- Her real name - is Esyllt Meiriadwen ap Gwrtheyrn.

0:04:48 > 0:04:51- Can I pour this Pinot Grigio now? - I'm gasping.

0:04:51 > 0:04:53- Yes. It's never too early.

0:04:53 > 0:04:55- And this is Gwenan Bonc.

0:04:57 > 0:05:00- She's also named after a farm.

0:05:01 > 0:05:03- Hello.

0:05:08 > 0:05:10- Oh, Huw! It's wonderful.

0:05:12 > 0:05:14- Come here.

0:05:14 > 0:05:17- Thank you - for 25 years of perfection.

0:05:18 > 0:05:19- Gross!

0:05:23 > 0:05:24- What's wrong with her?

0:05:24 > 0:05:26- What's wrong with her?- - She saw your dad and me kissing.

0:05:27 > 0:05:32- At least she didn't walk in on you - in that cottage on Millennium night.

0:05:33 > 0:05:34- That's what I call fireworks!

0:05:34 > 0:05:36- That's what I call fireworks!- - Gross!

0:05:36 > 0:05:40- I was only thanking your father - for this.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43- Why must you react like that...

0:05:43 > 0:05:47- ..every time we show a bit of thingy - towards each other?

0:05:48 > 0:05:52- If we hadn't done it, you and Gruff - wouldn't be here today.

0:05:52 > 0:05:53- I can't hear you!

0:05:54 > 0:05:56- Anyway. - Congratulations on 25 not out.

0:05:57 > 0:05:59- Raise your glasses.

0:05:59 > 0:06:00- Raise your glasses.- - Oh, really?

0:06:00 > 0:06:02- Come on, Ffi. Neck it.

0:06:02 > 0:06:03- Come on, Ffi. Neck it.- - Gruff!

0:06:03 > 0:06:05- To us - the Carlton-Lewises.

0:06:07 > 0:06:11- # Happy anniversary to you. - Happy anniversary to you

0:06:12 > 0:06:15- # Happy anniversary - Mr and Mrs Carlton-Lewis

0:06:15 > 0:06:17- # Happy anniversary to you #

0:06:17 > 0:06:20- Oh my gosh, guys! Silver wedding.

0:06:20 > 0:06:25- That's awesome and very apt for you, - Mr Carlton-Lewis, you silver fox!

0:06:26 > 0:06:29- Will you please stop - grossing me out?

0:06:32 > 0:06:34- What will you do to celebrate?

0:06:34 > 0:06:37- A romantic night for two? - A weekend away?

0:06:39 > 0:06:43- Dad has booked a table at Mam's - favourite restaurant and then...

0:06:43 > 0:06:46- ..Dad and Mam - definitely won't have sex.

0:06:53 > 0:06:54- Millennium Stadium?

0:06:57 > 0:07:00- There was nothing wrong - with the Arms Park.

0:07:00 > 0:07:03- It was rubbish but it did the job.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06- Well, but this new place?

0:07:07 > 0:07:09- You pay 500 for a ticket...

0:07:09 > 0:07:13- ..and you're sitting there, - ready to watch the match...

0:07:13 > 0:07:16- ..when a so-and-so gets up - to take a leak.

0:07:16 > 0:07:19- You stand up to - let him get past you.

0:07:19 > 0:07:21- Two minutes later, he's back.

0:07:21 > 0:07:23- Stand up again.

0:07:23 > 0:07:27- Next thing, his friend needs to go, - so you stand up again.

0:07:27 > 0:07:29- Two minutes later, he comes back.

0:07:30 > 0:07:32- Then his children need to go.

0:07:32 > 0:07:35- All 25 of them - need the loo at the same time.

0:07:35 > 0:07:37- I'm up and down like a yo-yo.

0:07:37 > 0:07:40- And then the final whistle is blown.

0:07:41 > 0:07:46- My brother has his own radio show. - He's got eight billion listeners.

0:07:48 > 0:07:51- He lets me DJ on his radio station.

0:07:51 > 0:07:53- My DJ name is...

0:07:53 > 0:07:55- ..DJ Awesome.

0:07:57 > 0:08:01- I don't have to go - on my brother's radio station...

0:08:03 > 0:08:07- ..because I've got - my own radio station, with Oswyn.

0:08:10 > 0:08:13- We're the best DJs in Caernarfon.

0:08:16 > 0:08:17- What are your DJ names?

0:08:19 > 0:08:21- He's...

0:08:22 > 0:08:24- ..DJ Lwmp and I'm...

0:08:27 > 0:08:29- I'm Dr Dre.

0:08:29 > 0:08:30- No way.

0:08:30 > 0:08:32- No way.- - Dr Dre.

0:08:33 > 0:08:35- Can I be on it?

0:08:35 > 0:08:36- Can I be on it?- - No way.

0:08:39 > 0:08:41- Where's your radio studio then?

0:08:43 > 0:08:47- Oh, Veloria, we had a lovely time - the other evening.

0:08:47 > 0:08:50- We went to Phil and Julie's house.

0:08:50 > 0:08:52- You know Phil - Rob's brother.

0:08:52 > 0:08:54- Yes. Lovely boy.

0:08:55 > 0:08:57- Heledd, their youngest...

0:08:57 > 0:09:01- ..is going to Leeds University - to do English Literature.

0:09:02 > 0:09:05- We had a running buffet - and a couple of pints.

0:09:05 > 0:09:07- It was lovely.

0:09:07 > 0:09:12- I tell you now, Veloria, putting - children through college is no joke.

0:09:12 > 0:09:16- Student loans are one thing - but you've got to help.

0:09:18 > 0:09:24- We're talking about accommodation, - food, books, laptops and allsorts.

0:09:24 > 0:09:26- I know exactly what you mean, Pam.

0:09:26 > 0:09:30- I remember putting our Annabel - through college.

0:09:31 > 0:09:36- Geoff wanted her to do accountancy - at the London School of Economics.

0:09:36 > 0:09:38- A chip off the old block.

0:09:38 > 0:09:43- I said, "Annabel, don't listen to - your father. Listen to your heart."

0:09:43 > 0:09:47- She opted for a foundation course - in fashion and design.

0:09:48 > 0:09:51- She didn't finish it - because she met Justin.

0:09:51 > 0:09:52- The rest is history.

0:09:53 > 0:09:57- You worry about them, - in case they end up in some squat.

0:09:59 > 0:10:03- That's why Geoff and I - decided to buy a flat for her...

0:10:03 > 0:10:05- ..right in the middle of London.

0:10:06 > 0:10:07- In Kensington.

0:10:09 > 0:10:12- I told Annabel - it was very convenient...

0:10:12 > 0:10:16- ..for restaurants, bars, - boutiques and galleries.

0:10:16 > 0:10:18- Did she live in London on her own?

0:10:18 > 0:10:20- Did she live in London on her own?- - No. She had a flatmate.

0:10:23 > 0:10:25- She paid rent to Geoff and me.

0:10:26 > 0:10:28- The flat paid for itself.

0:10:28 > 0:10:30- We considered selling it...

0:10:31 > 0:10:35- ..but we thought we may as well - keep it as a pied-a-terre.

0:10:35 > 0:10:38- We're forever - going up and down the M4...

0:10:38 > 0:10:41- ..when I go to Harley Street - to check my...

0:10:43 > 0:10:44- It's tripled in value.

0:10:44 > 0:10:47- I mean the flat, not my...

0:10:52 > 0:10:54- Here comes Cameron Jenkins.

0:10:54 > 0:10:56- He goes past Dan Carter.

0:10:56 > 0:10:58- He goes past Richie McCaw.

0:10:59 > 0:11:00- He scores!

0:11:02 > 0:11:03- Just before half time.

0:11:04 > 0:11:05- .

0:11:11 > 0:11:11- Subtitles

0:11:11 > 0:11:13- Subtitles- - Subtitles

0:11:17 > 0:11:18- # I met a handsome boy

0:11:19 > 0:11:23- # Down at the seaside, - down at the seaside

0:11:24 > 0:11:25- # Down at the seaside

0:11:26 > 0:11:28- # I met a handsome boy

0:11:28 > 0:11:30- # Down at the seaside

0:11:30 > 0:11:33- # Down at the seaside #

0:11:34 > 0:11:38- # One black one, one white one - And one with a bit of... #

0:11:39 > 0:11:43- Jojo, no! We're singing - joyous jamboree songs only!

0:11:44 > 0:11:47- # Sing rock and roll every morning

0:11:47 > 0:11:50- # Sing rock and roll every afternoon

0:11:51 > 0:11:53- # Sing rock and roll at night

0:11:53 > 0:11:57- # Sing rock and roll - To make things OK #

0:11:57 > 0:11:59- Let me explain.

0:11:59 > 0:12:02- Gwenan is an old college friend - of mine.

0:12:02 > 0:12:05- She comes from - the Llandeilo area originally...

0:12:06 > 0:12:10- ..but she fell "in love" - with a boy from Trefor...

0:12:10 > 0:12:14- ..who was doing biochemistry - in Bangor at the same time as us.

0:12:15 > 0:12:18- Gwenan has stayed up here - since then.

0:12:19 > 0:12:23- But she isn't with Robert Biochem - any more, I hasten to add.

0:12:24 > 0:12:26- Welcome, Gwenan.

0:12:26 > 0:12:27- How are you today?

0:12:27 > 0:12:29- Not too bad, thanks.

0:12:30 > 0:12:35- I'm sure you're all desperate - to hear how my day looks.

0:12:38 > 0:12:42- Excellent! Let's take yesterday - as an example.

0:12:42 > 0:12:46- I was awake earlier than a vet - on Grand National day...

0:12:46 > 0:12:49- ..as Grandma Whiskers would say.

0:12:49 > 0:12:53- I set two poems to music - before 10 o'clock in the morning...

0:12:53 > 0:12:58- ..when I wrote a song - for my latest musical - DJ Wilias.

0:12:58 > 0:13:03- A look of how life would be - for the poet from Rhydcymerau...

0:13:03 > 0:13:06- ..had be been born - in the 21st century.

0:13:06 > 0:13:09- He'd be on the decks, - with a name like that!

0:13:09 > 0:13:11- Get it?

0:13:11 > 0:13:13- DJ!

0:13:14 > 0:13:20- Next on the DJ Lwmp And Dr Dre Show, - a song from a man who sings things.

0:13:24 > 0:13:26- Whacker Whacker.

0:13:27 > 0:13:29- Do it again.

0:13:29 > 0:13:32- Eject it! - Maybe there's no tape in there.

0:13:37 > 0:13:39- You look like you had a late night.

0:13:45 > 0:13:47- I didn't get much sleep last night.

0:13:49 > 0:13:50- What's the matter?

0:13:50 > 0:13:52- Is something worrying you?

0:13:53 > 0:13:55- No, it's nothing like that.

0:13:57 > 0:13:59- Did Harold Spreader call again?

0:14:00 > 0:14:02- I thought you'd banned him.

0:14:03 > 0:14:04- No.

0:14:04 > 0:14:09- I was up until the early hours - playing games.

0:14:10 > 0:14:11- Games?

0:14:11 > 0:14:12- Games?- - Yes - games.

0:14:12 > 0:14:16- What were you playing - to keep you up so late?

0:14:16 > 0:14:18- Old Maid?

0:14:18 > 0:14:20- No, fool!

0:14:20 > 0:14:21- Jenga?

0:14:21 > 0:14:23- Jenga?- - No. None of those.

0:14:23 > 0:14:24- Well what then?

0:14:26 > 0:14:30- Grand Theft Auto IV Vice City - on the Xbox 360.

0:14:33 > 0:14:37- Oh, well Rockstar Games - know their stuff.

0:14:38 > 0:14:42- I'm partial - to a bit of Batman Arkham City.

0:14:44 > 0:14:49- I played it so much the other week, - I thought my name was Bruce Wayne!

0:14:51 > 0:14:53- Holy controller!

0:14:54 > 0:14:57- Then, I wrote an email - to Cefin Roberts.

0:14:57 > 0:15:00- I'm always happy to give him - a few pointers...

0:15:00 > 0:15:03- ..for his work with Glanaethwy.

0:15:03 > 0:15:05- Cef and I understand each other.

0:15:06 > 0:15:09- Mind you, - he's difficult to pin down.

0:15:09 > 0:15:11- He's a busy bee, like me.

0:15:11 > 0:15:16- As busy as Dirty Wil's dog's maggots - as Grandpa Hernia would say.

0:15:16 > 0:15:17- Did he email you back?

0:15:19 > 0:15:20- No.

0:15:23 > 0:15:27- I was exactly the same - with Call Of Duty: Ghosts.

0:15:30 > 0:15:34- COD: Ghosts on the PS4 - is my favourite game.

0:15:36 > 0:15:40- I love playing as one of - the special operations personnel...

0:15:41 > 0:15:46- ..who carry out clandestine missions - behind enemy lines.

0:15:46 > 0:15:48- It reminds me of the time...

0:15:49 > 0:15:52- ..when I competed in eisteddfodau - with Rhos Choir.

0:15:53 > 0:15:57- I must say - I like a bit of survival horror.

0:15:59 > 0:16:01- Things like Resident Evil.

0:16:02 > 0:16:07- It's good to have something - to raise your heart rate.

0:16:09 > 0:16:13- I thought that's why - you banned Harold Spreader.

0:16:15 > 0:16:16- Oh! Well.

0:16:16 > 0:16:18- Oh.

0:16:20 > 0:16:22- What's that?

0:16:26 > 0:16:30- Do you know the worst thing - about the Millennium Stadium?

0:16:32 > 0:16:34- It's in bl***y Cardiff.

0:16:36 > 0:16:39- It should be here, - in the birthplace of Welsh rugby.

0:16:40 > 0:16:44- They'd have a pitch they didn't - have to dig up every two minutes.

0:16:46 > 0:16:52- What do these city folk - from Cardiff know about lawns?

0:16:53 > 0:16:56- The men drink coffee - outside shops...

0:16:56 > 0:16:59- ..and parade around - with their handbags!

0:17:01 > 0:17:06- They don't know the difference - between grass and a bouncy castle.

0:17:08 > 0:17:10- What a night! - We must do it more often.

0:17:11 > 0:17:14- Yeah, I was so dreading it - but actually...

0:17:14 > 0:17:15- Ffion!

0:17:15 > 0:17:16- Ffion!- - Sorry.

0:17:16 > 0:17:21- It was a wonderful evening and the - food was splendid. Thank you, Daddy.

0:17:23 > 0:17:28- In case you didn't think we cared, - we've prepared something for you.

0:17:30 > 0:17:32- Ffi, let's swap.

0:17:32 > 0:17:33- Why?

0:17:33 > 0:17:35- Why?- - It'll be a nice touch.

0:17:35 > 0:17:37- Fine.

0:17:38 > 0:17:40- I'll go first. It's a poem.

0:17:41 > 0:17:43- A Quarter Of A Century.

0:17:43 > 0:17:49- The stars of a silver wedding - Are tonight here twinkling

0:17:50 > 0:17:56- Hand-in-hand you did marry - One soul, one entity.

0:17:57 > 0:18:00- Oh, Gruff. That was beautiful.

0:18:01 > 0:18:01- Yes, but I...

0:18:01 > 0:18:03- Yes, but I...- - Go on, Ffion.

0:18:03 > 0:18:05- OK.

0:18:07 > 0:18:08- The Celebration.

0:18:11 > 0:18:17- Beneath our parents' star - There is a fun-filled room

0:18:18 > 0:18:25- A child-free room where their lust - Turns into a hump, some rumpy pumpy.

0:18:28 > 0:18:29- It isn't funny! It's gross.

0:18:30 > 0:18:34- It's totes gross, - plus you didn't write it.

0:18:34 > 0:18:35- It's totes lads' lit.

0:18:36 > 0:18:38- You're so gross! You're so gross.

0:18:41 > 0:18:45- All you need for a good game - of rugby is a pitch and some posts.

0:18:46 > 0:18:50- Cameron says, - "Bamps! What about the atmosphere?"

0:18:50 > 0:18:53- "You'll find the best atmosphere - in the world...

0:18:53 > 0:18:56- "..in the Millennium Stadium."

0:18:56 > 0:18:58- Atmosphere?

0:18:58 > 0:18:59- C**p!

0:19:03 > 0:19:05- ENGINE SPLUTTERS

0:19:07 > 0:19:09- What's happened?

0:19:11 > 0:19:13- The van's chi has been disturbed.

0:19:21 > 0:19:25- Of course, this is the universe's - way of telling Jojo and I...

0:19:25 > 0:19:28- ..to have a rest - and to break our journey.

0:19:28 > 0:19:31- How long have you been - on the road, Val?

0:19:33 > 0:19:35- I'm sorry?

0:19:35 > 0:19:38- How long have you been travelling - today?

0:19:40 > 0:19:42- Well, it's hard to say.

0:19:45 > 0:19:47- For around 20 minutes.

0:19:47 > 0:19:51- There must be something magical - about this place.

0:19:51 > 0:19:53- We were led to this place.

0:19:56 > 0:19:59- Listen to the peace - and tranquility.

0:20:01 > 0:20:04- KNOCKING SOUND FROM THE ENGINE

0:20:08 > 0:20:10- Do you need some help?

0:20:10 > 0:20:12- No. Everything's alright.

0:20:13 > 0:20:14- The kindness of our brothers.

0:20:15 > 0:20:18- Sounds like the alternator's gone.

0:20:18 > 0:20:19- Sounds like the alternator's gone.- - No. Everything's alright.

0:20:20 > 0:20:21- The alternator is new.

0:20:21 > 0:20:24- That's strange. - How long have you had it?

0:20:24 > 0:20:26- Since 2004.

0:20:26 > 0:20:28- That's over ten years ago!

0:20:28 > 0:20:30- Let me take a look at it.

0:20:30 > 0:20:31- Let me take a look at it.- - No, thank you.

0:20:33 > 0:20:36- Suit yourself. - I won't offer to help another hippy.

0:20:37 > 0:20:38- Excuse me! Hippy?

0:20:38 > 0:20:40- Yes - you.

0:20:40 > 0:20:42- The brotherhood of man.

0:20:47 > 0:20:52- # I am your brother - And you are my brother

0:20:53 > 0:20:56- # Oh, why then can't I have

0:20:57 > 0:21:00- # The right to live? #

0:21:14 > 0:21:17- Introducing a new choir - for middle-aged singers

0:21:22 > 0:21:25- # Gaining weight and hot flushes

0:21:30 > 0:21:33- # Drinking wine, becoming lushes

0:21:33 > 0:21:37- # Never mind the toy boy crushes

0:21:37 > 0:21:41- # And our brains turn to mushes

0:21:42 > 0:21:45- # She forgets her phone - And her keys every day

0:21:46 > 0:21:51- # Hello, menopause

0:21:58 > 0:22:01- # Thinning on top, so grow a goatee

0:22:01 > 0:22:05- # Buy a Harley and a Ferrari

0:22:05 > 0:22:09- # Cop off with a woman of 30

0:22:10 > 0:22:13- # Hello, menopause

0:22:13 > 0:22:17- # Leave keys in our freezers

0:22:17 > 0:22:21- # Having to use tweezers

0:22:21 > 0:22:25- # Try to hide that bald patch

0:22:25 > 0:22:29- # End up looking like Julius Caesar

0:22:29 > 0:22:33- # Moans and groans, - arthritic in parts

0:22:34 > 0:22:38- # Insomnia, snoring - and constant farts

0:22:41 > 0:22:45- # In the office band I will play

0:22:46 > 0:22:49- # Scoffed muffins in the gym today

0:22:49 > 0:22:53- # Not yet old but well on the way

0:22:53 > 0:22:57- # Hello, menopause

0:22:58 > 0:23:02- # Menopause

0:23:02 > 0:23:05- # Menopause

0:23:07 > 0:23:15- # Only menopause #

0:23:28 > 0:23:31- S4C subtitles by Eirlys A Jones

0:23:31 > 0:23:32- .