Sul y Mamau

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0:00:01 > 0:00:03- "From her oak, I am one acorn

0:00:03 > 0:00:06- "That took root - in her fertilized soil

0:00:06 > 0:00:08- "Today I give thanks to her

0:00:08 > 0:00:11- "More than a mum - Mam has been to me"

0:00:12 > 0:00:14- The warm words - of Robin Llwyd ab Owain.

0:00:14 > 0:00:19- Words that are on the minds - of many of us on Mothering Sunday.

0:00:19 > 0:00:23- A day that has a different meaning - for many of us...

0:00:23 > 0:00:25- ..depending on our circumstances...

0:00:26 > 0:00:29- ..as we remember - a mother or grandmother...

0:00:29 > 0:00:32- ..and their unconditional love - for us.

0:03:35 > 0:03:40- This year, it's a century - since women won the right to vote.

0:03:41 > 0:03:46- The battle for equal rights has - dragged on throughout the century.

0:03:47 > 0:03:52- We are thankful that - there were women who were strong.

0:03:52 > 0:03:58- Strong women are part - of our family experiences.

0:03:58 > 0:04:01- "Women with steel" - Nain would call them.

0:04:01 > 0:04:06- That steel is something that a girl - that grows up to be a mother...

0:04:06 > 0:04:08- ..tries to transfer to her children.

0:04:09 > 0:04:12- Tonight, we'll focus on - two very special mothers.

0:04:12 > 0:04:15- Two that have been shaken - by experiences...

0:04:15 > 0:04:19- ..that most of us - wouldn't go through in a lifetime.

0:04:19 > 0:04:22- But they've got through it - and have done so with strength.

0:04:23 > 0:04:27- Fflur Fychan lives on a farm - in Abercegir near Machynlleth.

0:04:27 > 0:04:30- Ryland went to meet Fflur - and her family.

0:04:35 > 0:04:39- In August 2010, Fflur Fychan's life - changed overnight.

0:04:40 > 0:04:43- During a family holiday to France...

0:04:43 > 0:04:48- ..she was paralysed by the - rare condition transverse myelitis.

0:04:48 > 0:04:53- Confined to a wheelchair, she's - determined to be a normal mum...

0:04:53 > 0:04:57- ..to her three daughters, - Mari, Lisa and Nansi.

0:04:57 > 0:05:00- You want sugar?

0:05:00 > 0:05:03- The condition, of course, - is a challenge...

0:05:03 > 0:05:07- ..to be a mother - and to keep a family going.

0:05:07 > 0:05:13- Yes, it's surprising how - some simple tasks are frustrating.

0:05:13 > 0:05:17- Sometimes, you want - to do things for the children.

0:05:17 > 0:05:21- But they've had to become - more independent.

0:05:21 > 0:05:24- As they've got older, - it's become easier.

0:05:25 > 0:05:29- Maybe they're being better prepared - for the future.

0:05:30 > 0:05:33- As a mother, - you like to do things for them.

0:05:34 > 0:05:37- Do you want milk, Nansi? - You've done it?

0:05:37 > 0:05:38- Take it to the table, then.

0:05:39 > 0:05:43- I get the impression that - you're a very practical family...

0:05:43 > 0:05:46- ..and that you can face challenges - with strength.

0:05:47 > 0:05:50- I didn't choose this situation.

0:05:50 > 0:05:55- However, I couldn't sit back - and let things just happen.

0:05:55 > 0:06:01- We try and face every challenge - and think, "How can we do this?"

0:06:01 > 0:06:05- Rather than do nothing, we think...

0:06:05 > 0:06:10- .."We'll try. We might have to think - more creatively."

0:06:10 > 0:06:15- Do you want to practise your dancing - later? If we have the time.

0:06:15 > 0:06:18- The Urdd Eisteddfod is before long. - OK?

0:06:18 > 0:06:24- Though she's in a wheelchair, - it doesn't affect anything.

0:06:24 > 0:06:28- Mam always makes sure - we follow our dreams.

0:06:29 > 0:06:34- I don't know how she manages things - for us three.

0:06:34 > 0:06:38- The children were quite young - when Fflur had the condition.

0:06:38 > 0:06:42- They've grown up with Fflur - in the condition she's in.

0:06:42 > 0:06:44- She's still Mam to them.

0:06:44 > 0:06:48- They're used to having - slightly different responsibilities.

0:06:49 > 0:06:53- Helping each other, helping Fflur. - That's not all bad.

0:06:56 > 0:06:59- Being independent is important...

0:06:59 > 0:07:03- ..but I have to accept - that I need help.

0:07:03 > 0:07:07- I'm lucky to have my family - around me.

0:07:07 > 0:07:12- As the children get older, - the sisters help too.

0:07:13 > 0:07:16- That fills me with joy.

0:07:17 > 0:07:21- You used to be a teacher, - but you've had a career change.

0:07:21 > 0:07:25- When I became paralysed, - I lost confidence.

0:07:25 > 0:07:30- It was difficult enough - that my children had to adapt.

0:07:30 > 0:07:34- I didn't feel that I wanted - to return to the classroom...

0:07:34 > 0:07:38- ..and force other people's children - to adapt too much.

0:07:38 > 0:07:40- Maybe that was a mistake.

0:07:40 > 0:07:45- When I've taught children - at Sunday school...

0:07:45 > 0:07:48- ..they look right in your eyes.

0:07:48 > 0:07:53- They only care - about what you're saying to them.

0:07:53 > 0:07:55- They don't see the disability.

0:07:56 > 0:07:58- It's important - that we say thank you.

0:07:59 > 0:08:02- Can you see the picture? - It's a picture of Jesus.

0:08:02 > 0:08:04- He helped a lot of people.

0:08:04 > 0:08:08- I think that faith - has always been a part of my life.

0:08:08 > 0:08:13- During dark times, I turn to it - and I turn to prayer...

0:08:13 > 0:08:16- ..or I ask for help sometimes.

0:08:16 > 0:08:19- When my life changed - because of this condition...

0:08:19 > 0:08:24- ..I looked into - different forms of energy...

0:08:24 > 0:08:30- ..and saw that faith - in many countries was different.

0:08:31 > 0:08:35- But there's something - that binds people together too.

0:08:35 > 0:08:40- In Sunday school, - we made Mothering Sunday cards.

0:08:40 > 0:08:44- We listened to the story - of the ten ill people...

0:08:44 > 0:08:47- ..but only one said "thanks".

0:08:51 > 0:08:56- Sometimes I think it's the energy - that helps me to be positive...

0:08:57 > 0:09:01- ..rather than to focus - on the negative and the cruel world.

0:09:01 > 0:09:04- You can be pulled into - that side of things...

0:09:05 > 0:09:08- ..but I try my best - to go the opposite direction...

0:09:08 > 0:09:11- ..and to look for the best - in every situation.

0:09:11 > 0:09:14- Family is very important to Fflur.

0:09:14 > 0:09:19- It's something that's - kept her going, given her strength.

0:09:19 > 0:09:22- She's ensured that the children...

0:09:22 > 0:09:28- ..haven't missed out because of her - condition and that they enjoy life.

0:09:28 > 0:09:34- It's nice there's a day that - we can give something back to her.

0:09:34 > 0:09:37- And give her presents - and spoil her.

0:12:30 > 0:12:34- For some, Mothering Sunday is a day - to celebrate with the children.

0:12:34 > 0:12:36- For others, there's sadness.

0:12:36 > 0:12:40- It's an opportunity to remember - and to mull things over.

0:12:40 > 0:12:44- In autumn 2014, Heledd Tomos - and her husband, Gethin...

0:12:44 > 0:12:47- ..found out they were expecting - their first child.

0:12:48 > 0:12:51- It was a normal pregnancy, - everything was fine.

0:12:51 > 0:12:55- I had a 12-week scan - - everything was fine.

0:12:55 > 0:12:58- I went back for the second scan - at 20 weeks.

0:12:59 > 0:13:03- The scan was a bit odd.

0:13:03 > 0:13:07- They took their time, - checking and rechecking.

0:13:07 > 0:13:10- They couldn't say a lot at the time.

0:13:10 > 0:13:14- We were then sent to Cardiff.

0:13:14 > 0:13:20- Then more scans before finding out - how sick the baby was...

0:13:20 > 0:13:23- ..that he hadn't developed properly.

0:13:24 > 0:13:27- Sadly, he wasn't for this world.

0:13:32 > 0:13:36- How important was your faith? - How did that help you?

0:13:37 > 0:13:40- It helped me a lot - during difficult times.

0:13:40 > 0:13:43- I read the Bible often...

0:13:43 > 0:13:46- ..and tried to find a way forward...

0:13:46 > 0:13:50- ..and to have the strength - through reading the Bible.

0:13:52 > 0:13:55- I read similar stories in the Bible.

0:13:55 > 0:13:57- But it was difficult too...

0:13:58 > 0:14:03- ..because I questioned - why God had done this to us.

0:14:04 > 0:14:10- It was a help in one way, - but you also question your faith.

0:14:10 > 0:14:12- You think, "Why us?"

0:14:13 > 0:14:17- Faith - has always been important to me.

0:14:17 > 0:14:21- During difficult times, - you definitely return to it.

0:14:22 > 0:14:25- What support did you receive?

0:14:25 > 0:14:27- There's the Aching Arms charity.

0:14:28 > 0:14:31- How important is it - that there's a wider community...

0:14:32 > 0:14:35- ..that gives you - that type of support?

0:14:35 > 0:14:39- I found Aching Arms - through online forums.

0:14:40 > 0:14:46- Aching Arms sends a teddy - to people who've lost a baby.

0:14:47 > 0:14:53- The teddy's given by another family - who've lost a baby.

0:14:54 > 0:14:58- That creates - a really nice relationship...

0:14:58 > 0:15:02- ..that a bereaved family - gives to another bereaved family.

0:15:03 > 0:15:05- After I found out about them...

0:15:05 > 0:15:09- ..I developed a relationship - with them.

0:15:09 > 0:15:14- I started handing out Aching Arms - teddies at Glangwili Hospital.

0:15:15 > 0:15:18- I arrange that they go there.

0:15:18 > 0:15:21- They're handed out at the hospital.

0:15:21 > 0:15:24- You lost Cai...

0:15:24 > 0:15:28- ..but Myfi and Deio - have arrived since then...

0:15:28 > 0:15:33- ..and have gladdened your heart - and filled your life with happiness.

0:15:33 > 0:15:36- How aware are they - of their big brother?

0:15:36 > 0:15:39- Is it important - that you remember him?

0:15:40 > 0:15:44- We talk about Cai all the time. - Cai is part of our lives.

0:15:44 > 0:15:47- We have pictures of him - all over the house.

0:15:48 > 0:15:50- His tree is in the garden.

0:15:51 > 0:15:57- It's a normal part of their lives - that Cai is with us.

0:15:57 > 0:15:58- Yes.

0:17:53 > 0:17:56- Good morning. Thank you - for coming this morning.

0:17:56 > 0:18:01- Capel Salem in Canton, Cardiff, - opens its doors to many societies.

0:18:01 > 0:18:05- One morning a fortnight, - parents and their children...

0:18:05 > 0:18:09- ..go to a breakfast club - led by Reverend Evan Morgan.

0:18:10 > 0:18:14- On the menu today - is smoked salmon and cheese.

0:18:14 > 0:18:18- There's fruit, some sweet treats - and fresh coffee.

0:18:20 > 0:18:24- The breakfast club - was founded about ten years ago.

0:18:24 > 0:18:28- The chapelgoers felt we needed - to do more in the community.

0:18:28 > 0:18:33- We felt that a lot of Welsh speakers - who've moved to the capital...

0:18:33 > 0:18:37- ..are far away - from their grandparents.

0:18:37 > 0:18:42- So, mothers, with parents - and grandmothers welcome as well...

0:18:42 > 0:18:47- ..come every other Wednesday morning - to have breakfast...

0:18:47 > 0:18:50- ..and to have the chance - to chat and socialize.

0:18:50 > 0:18:53- I've volunteered - for almost ten years now.

0:18:54 > 0:18:58- I saw it as an opportunity - after cutting down on my work hours.

0:18:58 > 0:19:03- Because I enjoy being with children, - I give cuddles to the babies...

0:19:03 > 0:19:09- ..while the mothers have the freedom - to have breakfast and to socialize.

0:19:10 > 0:19:14- I started going to - the breakfast club two weeks ago...

0:19:14 > 0:19:19- ..to try and get to know more mums - and for my son to meet other kids.

0:19:19 > 0:19:22- I started coming - because my friends were going.

0:19:23 > 0:19:28- I liked the idea of meeting mums - and dads and grandparents...

0:19:28 > 0:19:34- ..in an easy-going club where we can - eat, talk and share our experiences.

0:19:34 > 0:19:36- We're given a very warm welcome.

0:19:36 > 0:19:40- It's a great resource - which brings us closer together.

0:19:40 > 0:19:44- I came recently - and met Gwennan here.

0:19:44 > 0:19:48- She asked, - "What are you doing this afternoon?"

0:19:48 > 0:19:50- We became friends.

0:19:51 > 0:19:55- The chapel - is like a community centre.

0:19:55 > 0:19:59- The nursery meets here - and several choirs rehearse here.

0:19:59 > 0:20:02- We as a chapel organize events too.

0:20:03 > 0:20:07- We feed the homeless - and give them shelter.

0:20:07 > 0:20:12- We raise money for refugees and - the food bank, as many others do.

0:20:12 > 0:20:14- It's also some sort of bridge.

0:20:14 > 0:20:19- Some ask about Sunday school and - about baptisms when they come here.

0:20:20 > 0:20:23- They feel at home here. - It's a door to the chapel.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26- Anyone else want tea or coffee?

0:20:27 > 0:20:31- It's nice to feel - that everyone's in the same boat.

0:20:31 > 0:20:35- That we can talk about - the same things to each other.

0:20:35 > 0:20:39- That's what I enjoy. I've got a lot - out of it. I hope others have too.

0:20:39 > 0:20:43- Parents feel - that they get spoiled a little.

0:20:43 > 0:20:46- They can come here, relax...

0:20:46 > 0:20:49- ..and we look after the children - and babies if they want.

0:20:50 > 0:20:52- There are toys for them.

0:20:52 > 0:20:56- They feel that it's a place - where they can take a deep breath...

0:20:57 > 0:20:59- ..and just relax.

0:21:07 > 0:21:12- Dear God, help us to remember - to say thank you every time.

0:21:13 > 0:21:16- Help us in the way - we live our lives...

0:21:16 > 0:21:20- ..to show that we look after - those around us.

0:21:20 > 0:21:24- And help us to be thankful - for all the things...

0:21:24 > 0:21:26- ..that other people do for us.

0:21:26 > 0:21:30- On behalf of the children of Wales, - thank you for our mothers...

0:21:31 > 0:21:35- ..and for the tireless way - they care for us.

0:21:35 > 0:21:36- Amen.

0:21:41 > 0:21:44- Mothers, - I hope you've been spoiled today.

0:21:45 > 0:21:46- It's a day of celebration.

0:21:47 > 0:21:50- It's also a day of remembrance - and contemplation...

0:21:50 > 0:21:55- ..and to count our blessings - for that priceless gift, a mother...

0:21:55 > 0:21:57- ..and to be thankful for her.

0:21:57 > 0:22:00- And in my mother tongue, - I say goodbye.

0:24:23 > 0:24:25- S4C Subtitles by Testun Cyf.

0:24:25 > 0:24:25- .