0:00:02 > 0:00:03# Happy birthday to you... #
0:00:03 > 0:00:06In 1917, George V started a royal tradition.
0:00:06 > 0:00:10He sent a telegram to every person who turned 100.
0:00:10 > 0:00:12# ..Happy birthday... #
0:00:12 > 0:00:14That year, he sent 24.
0:00:14 > 0:00:19"I send my congratulations on such a special occasion."
0:00:19 > 0:00:20How nice.
0:00:20 > 0:00:22That's for you.
0:00:22 > 0:00:23In this year alone,
0:00:23 > 0:00:28his granddaughter the Queen is expected to send more than 6,000.
0:00:28 > 0:00:31- Many happy returns.- Aren't I lucky?
0:00:31 > 0:00:34This is you in the card. That's brilliant.
0:00:35 > 0:00:39One in three children born today are likely to see their 100th birthday.
0:00:39 > 0:00:43All this points to a major shift in society.
0:00:43 > 0:00:46Thanks to the miracle of medicine and the profound
0:00:46 > 0:00:50changes in our lifestyles, we are living longer.
0:00:51 > 0:00:54CHEERING
0:00:55 > 0:00:59But there are many serious consequences for us all.
0:00:59 > 0:01:01Ones we've yet to confront -
0:01:01 > 0:01:02for the NHS...
0:01:02 > 0:01:05We've had good times with the health.
0:01:05 > 0:01:09But there's so many of us and that's making it very difficult.
0:01:09 > 0:01:11..for pensions...
0:01:11 > 0:01:14I've no idea what my pension is.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16Obviously I'm not starving.
0:01:16 > 0:01:18- Can we come in? - ..for care...
0:01:18 > 0:01:21There's so many people getting to be old these days
0:01:21 > 0:01:24and they all need help.
0:01:24 > 0:01:25..and for families.
0:01:25 > 0:01:30I want to be able to manage it all and I find that overwhelming.
0:01:30 > 0:01:33It's not always easy being 100.
0:01:33 > 0:01:38- You look after your son, don't you? - Yes. But shall I tell you something?
0:01:38 > 0:01:41I would rather I put him to rest
0:01:41 > 0:01:45while I'm here than I should leave him behind alone.
0:01:46 > 0:01:50That doesn't sound natural for a mother to say that, does it?
0:01:57 > 0:01:59I'm Joan Bakewell.
0:01:59 > 0:02:03A decade ago, the government made me the voice of older people.
0:02:03 > 0:02:05And in the years that followed, I discovered
0:02:05 > 0:02:08many of the problems older people have to face.
0:02:08 > 0:02:11Well, I'm getting pretty old myself now. I'm in my mid-80s,
0:02:11 > 0:02:14closer to those problems all the time.
0:02:14 > 0:02:19So I'm going to find out what life's like for those who are 100 and more.
0:02:20 > 0:02:23I'm lucky to be 101 years old.
0:02:23 > 0:02:25Nobody wants to die.
0:02:25 > 0:02:29I don't feel old. It's only a number.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31I can't say it's a very good life.
0:02:31 > 0:02:35You feel you want to do things and you can't.
0:02:35 > 0:02:37I think I can be an asset.
0:02:37 > 0:02:41The world could learn a lot from people my age.
0:02:41 > 0:02:46I've had a good life and I've persevered with myself.
0:02:50 > 0:02:54George Francis Patrick Emmerson.
0:02:58 > 0:03:03I bought a badge when I was 101 and I went into the restaurant
0:03:03 > 0:03:04and I said to everybody,
0:03:04 > 0:03:09"Put down your mobile phones, shut them off, shut your pagers
0:03:09 > 0:03:14"and listen to me. I'm 101 years old."
0:03:14 > 0:03:15And they all clapped.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20Life is worth living. Every minute of it.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23That's why I hate going to bed early.
0:03:23 > 0:03:26I hate sleeping. I can't sleep.
0:03:26 > 0:03:29I go to bed at two o'clock in the morning sometimes.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32Television's on and I'm not even watching it, you know,
0:03:32 > 0:03:36I'm just listening to the voices.
0:03:36 > 0:03:37- George.- Hello.
0:03:37 > 0:03:40- I'm Joan. I've come to visit you. - Hello, Joan.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42- Can I have a cup of tea?- Yes.
0:03:42 > 0:03:47- So you're walking well. - I can't grumble at 101, can I?
0:03:47 > 0:03:52- No, certainly can't. So you look after yourself, do you?- Yes.
0:03:52 > 0:03:56- So you get around your house quite easily.- Yes, I manage.
0:03:56 > 0:03:59We'll get to know each other.
0:03:59 > 0:04:03- There's nothing like a cup of tea for making friends.- Oh, dear.
0:04:05 > 0:04:08- I remember my grandma died in our house.- Do you?
0:04:08 > 0:04:12- That was some time ago. - That was some time ago.
0:04:12 > 0:04:15Watch out. Watch out.
0:04:15 > 0:04:19Do you spend a lot of time remembering the past?
0:04:19 > 0:04:23I can remember it in detail. I can remember the fashion changes,
0:04:23 > 0:04:26what life was like before electricity.
0:04:26 > 0:04:29All my brothers and sisters have died
0:04:29 > 0:04:30and I'm the only one survived.
0:04:30 > 0:04:34I think my mother would have been very proud of me.
0:04:34 > 0:04:38I'm a fighter. I don't give in easily.
0:04:38 > 0:04:43George is an artist. He'd loved to have been a professional.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45When you're looking for something, you can't find it.
0:04:45 > 0:04:51Instead, he earned his living as a tax officer. An unusual tax officer.
0:04:51 > 0:04:54He often liked to include a little painting with the tax demands
0:04:54 > 0:04:56he sent out.
0:04:56 > 0:04:59Now he has cataracts, his eyesight is failing.
0:05:01 > 0:05:06I do paintings from memory now. A lot more than I used to.
0:05:06 > 0:05:08I've got a very good memory.
0:05:08 > 0:05:12I retain a memory of a thing that I pass, I can paint it.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17George's son lives nearby and he has a cleaner who comes
0:05:17 > 0:05:21regularly and who doubles as a carer.
0:05:21 > 0:05:25But loneliness can be a problem and he tries to keep himself active.
0:05:25 > 0:05:30# I'm forever blowing bubbles
0:05:30 > 0:05:33# Pretty bubbles in the air... #
0:05:37 > 0:05:41My name is May Ethel Bareham.
0:05:41 > 0:05:45I am 104. February I shall be 105.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47I've still got some teeth!
0:05:49 > 0:05:52What else have I got?
0:05:52 > 0:05:55May lives in Mersea, Essex.
0:05:55 > 0:05:59She has a flat in council-owned sheltered housing.
0:05:59 > 0:06:02- So this is your seat?- Yes.
0:06:02 > 0:06:05The choice of seat is enormously important.
0:06:05 > 0:06:07This is the afternoon one.
0:06:07 > 0:06:10I get the sun until the sunset.
0:06:11 > 0:06:14As we get older, our horizons can narrow.
0:06:14 > 0:06:17May values her independence.
0:06:17 > 0:06:20What would you do if you had an emergency?
0:06:20 > 0:06:23- I got a button. - You got that with you?
0:06:23 > 0:06:27So I just press the button and medics come in.
0:06:27 > 0:06:31So I want to stay here...
0:06:31 > 0:06:33to the end, if I can.
0:06:33 > 0:06:37Cos it's all very well going in a home.
0:06:37 > 0:06:41But you've lost all your independence, haven't you, really?
0:06:41 > 0:06:44Take me bag. OK, dear.
0:06:44 > 0:06:47And I can still walk down the lobby.
0:06:47 > 0:06:49I've got the rail, I've got me sticks.
0:06:49 > 0:06:53I've always wanted to be independent.
0:06:53 > 0:06:59I've had a good life and I've persevered with myself.
0:06:59 > 0:07:03So many of my friends have all passed on that were here.
0:07:03 > 0:07:06I'm the only one left, really.
0:07:06 > 0:07:08Afternoon.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11Cos when you get older, you have to make friends with younger people.
0:07:11 > 0:07:14- That's right. - People in their 70s.- Yes.
0:07:14 > 0:07:18Make a big score today.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22- Oh.- Oh.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25- 32 that time, May.- Oh, right.
0:07:25 > 0:07:30We used to think 70, 80 was old, but our view of old age is changing.
0:07:30 > 0:07:34The over 100s are the fastest growing part of our population
0:07:34 > 0:07:37and the number of people reaching a century is predicted to rise
0:07:37 > 0:07:41exponentially, doubling every ten years.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43So if we look at 2017,
0:07:43 > 0:07:48we have 14,500 people over the age of 100 in the UK.
0:07:48 > 0:07:52Go on down to 2050, we have 190,000.
0:07:52 > 0:07:56So essential projection is absolutely for continued
0:07:56 > 0:07:58increases in life expectancy to take place.
0:07:58 > 0:08:01- Thank you.- Hello.- How are you?
0:08:01 > 0:08:05VOICEOVER: I'm in Harrow, North London, to see my next centenarian.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08She prides herself on keeping active.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12Diana Eva Gould.
0:08:12 > 0:08:16I'm going to be 105.
0:08:16 > 0:08:21Diana came to Britain from Poland as a baby in 1912
0:08:21 > 0:08:24and worked as an haute couture seamstress
0:08:24 > 0:08:25in the West End of London.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28She lives in a retirement flat that she owns
0:08:28 > 0:08:31and is proud of her independence.
0:08:31 > 0:08:34I don't feel old. It's only a number.
0:08:36 > 0:08:39I've got these things that I do regularly,
0:08:39 > 0:08:45like having a shower, getting my breakfast, making the bed.
0:08:47 > 0:08:52I try to go across to Sainsbury's because even if I don't do any
0:08:52 > 0:08:59shopping, I can walk up and down the aisle, so I'm doing some exercise.
0:09:03 > 0:09:08- One of the ways that you stay fit is to practise your diabolo.- Yes.
0:09:08 > 0:09:13- And you do it everyday.- Yes. - And you do 150...- Catch-ups.
0:09:13 > 0:09:16Now, a lot of people don't know what it is and I certainly haven't seen
0:09:16 > 0:09:18it in action for a long time.
0:09:18 > 0:09:20And I've never seen anyone who's 105 do it!
0:09:20 > 0:09:24- No, you probably won't. - So can you show me, please?- Yes.
0:09:34 > 0:09:36This is well nigh impossible.
0:09:38 > 0:09:42Be sure it's facing you. Go on!
0:09:46 > 0:09:49It's very good. It's a very good toy.
0:09:49 > 0:09:51It's a good weight.
0:09:51 > 0:09:53Just look at that.
0:09:53 > 0:09:55105-year-old muscles!
0:09:55 > 0:09:58- That's hard.- That's really good.
0:09:58 > 0:10:00It is hard, it is hard.
0:10:03 > 0:10:07Of course, an active body isn't all that counts.
0:10:07 > 0:10:10We need to keep our minds active, too.
0:10:10 > 0:10:14Olivier Bell has always enjoyed a rich cultural life.
0:10:14 > 0:10:18She's related by marriage to the Bloomsbury Group of artists
0:10:18 > 0:10:20and writers.
0:10:20 > 0:10:22She's very comfortably off.
0:10:22 > 0:10:25She lives in a lovely old house in the Sussex Downs with
0:10:25 > 0:10:27a permanent live-in carer.
0:10:29 > 0:10:33In the past few years, she's had a series of mini strokes.
0:10:34 > 0:10:38Oh, you're up. I've come to see you. How are you?
0:10:38 > 0:10:40So you're up and dressed.
0:10:40 > 0:10:44And... She's going to do your hair.
0:10:47 > 0:10:48You keep a routine, don't you?
0:10:51 > 0:10:53Do you? I think it helps, don't you?
0:10:59 > 0:11:01This is a difficult bit.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05Twirl it so that stays in.
0:11:08 > 0:11:12In her 70s and 80s, Olivier edited the diaries of writer
0:11:12 > 0:11:14Virginia Woolf.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16Would you like some squash?
0:11:16 > 0:11:19She's also helped run the local literary festival at Charleston
0:11:19 > 0:11:22since it began in 1988.
0:11:22 > 0:11:25You were a trustee till about three or four years ago.
0:11:27 > 0:11:28You're now Life President.
0:11:33 > 0:11:35No, I don't know what that means
0:11:35 > 0:11:38but in terms of work, you're literally thinking in terms
0:11:38 > 0:11:41of weeks not years.
0:11:41 > 0:11:45Because there's endless people write to you
0:11:45 > 0:11:48and want you to read things and say things,
0:11:48 > 0:11:52so it's not a full-time job but you don't stop doing stuff.
0:11:59 > 0:12:02What I've learned from spending the day with Olivier is that
0:12:02 > 0:12:04she's a very intelligent woman,
0:12:04 > 0:12:07and she used to be very talkative and assertive and busy
0:12:07 > 0:12:10and now she can't be. She's lost her fluency.
0:12:10 > 0:12:12She hasn't lost her brain.
0:12:16 > 0:12:19It's so difficult for her to communicate
0:12:19 > 0:12:22and she wishes it wasn't. It's her great regret.
0:12:22 > 0:12:26It's regret we might all have in our day.
0:12:27 > 0:12:30I know from my own experience that keeping active,
0:12:30 > 0:12:33keeping working, gives a purpose to life.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36That's what matters to many old people.
0:12:36 > 0:12:41I pray you, in your letters,
0:12:41 > 0:12:45When you shall these unlucky deeds relate,
0:12:45 > 0:12:47Speak of me as I am.
0:12:49 > 0:12:52My name is Earl Cameron.
0:12:52 > 0:12:57I'm 100 years old and a few days.
0:12:57 > 0:13:01My birthday was this year, August 8th.
0:13:03 > 0:13:08And...I'm now in my second hundredth year, if you like.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13Earl lives in a council flat in the West Midlands.
0:13:13 > 0:13:17He moved to the UK from Bermuda in the late '30s to find work.
0:13:17 > 0:13:19He certainly succeeded.
0:13:19 > 0:13:23He's been an actor in films and television for 70 years.
0:13:23 > 0:13:29My last part I played was about three years ago, a very small part
0:13:29 > 0:13:31in a film called Inception.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34I haven't had any parts since then.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37Sooner or later, my agent will call me up and say they want me
0:13:37 > 0:13:39for something.
0:13:39 > 0:13:41- You're not entitled to vote. - No.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44Still, you won't catch me feeling sorry for you.
0:13:44 > 0:13:48He's appeared in films like The Queen with Helen Mirren.
0:13:48 > 0:13:51But it is your government.
0:13:51 > 0:13:52Yes.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55I suppose that is some consolation.
0:13:57 > 0:14:02I've had a good innings. I've been in about 30-odd films.
0:14:02 > 0:14:07A lot of them were good supporting roles, some very small parts.
0:14:07 > 0:14:13I'm ready to play any worthwhile part that came my way.
0:14:13 > 0:14:16Yes. Within reason, of course.
0:14:16 > 0:14:19I couldn't play a 25-year-old.
0:14:22 > 0:14:25They may be young in mind and active in body,
0:14:25 > 0:14:28but these 100-year-olds might not have been with us
0:14:28 > 0:14:31if it weren't for the advances of modern medicine.
0:14:31 > 0:14:36It's estimated the NHS in England spends around £9 billion
0:14:36 > 0:14:39a year caring for people over 85.
0:14:40 > 0:14:46That's 8.5% of the budget on just over 2% of the population.
0:14:48 > 0:14:53That was the most wonderful thing to start, the National Health Service.
0:14:53 > 0:14:57But I'm afraid it's going a little bit to pot now.
0:14:57 > 0:15:00People I think are taking advantage.
0:15:00 > 0:15:03I think the National Health shouldn't be political.
0:15:03 > 0:15:07We gotta find some way of affording it, haven't we?
0:15:07 > 0:15:12We take it for granted now. Peace of mind is worth a lot.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18With the population ageing, many older people remain well,
0:15:18 > 0:15:20but eventually what will happen is you will have multiple
0:15:20 > 0:15:23long-term medical conditions that you live with
0:15:23 > 0:15:27and you will get some age-related frailty where you don't have
0:15:27 > 0:15:29much in reserve.
0:15:31 > 0:15:34Each year, more than three quarters of a million people
0:15:34 > 0:15:37over 85 in the UK have a fall.
0:15:37 > 0:15:4130,000 of them break their hips and need hospital surgery.
0:15:42 > 0:15:46We're here at North Tees hospital, which is our trauma hospital
0:15:46 > 0:15:48and spinal unit.
0:15:48 > 0:15:51We've seen over the years increasing number of patients -
0:15:51 > 0:15:55older patients - coming in with fractured hips.
0:15:56 > 0:15:59But for the very old, an operation on a fractured hip
0:15:59 > 0:16:01comes with a lot of risk.
0:16:05 > 0:16:08Tony Nargol and his team are getting ready to operate
0:16:08 > 0:16:11on a 95-year-old patient.
0:16:11 > 0:16:16She has dementia and has had a nasty fall that's broken her hip.
0:16:16 > 0:16:18She's in acute pain.
0:16:18 > 0:16:22After serious consultation between doctors and her children,
0:16:22 > 0:16:25they've decided to go ahead with the operation.
0:16:25 > 0:16:28Her family have said they're happy for us
0:16:28 > 0:16:30to film it without identifying her.
0:16:37 > 0:16:39They've given her a spinal anaesthetic rather than
0:16:39 > 0:16:41a general one.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45To me, age doesn't come into it.
0:16:45 > 0:16:47If you're 110, we will still operate.
0:16:47 > 0:16:50The main thing is what are we trying to achieve?
0:16:50 > 0:16:54What we know is not good for a patient is to sit in a bed
0:16:54 > 0:16:57with a fractured hip for a month and get pressure sores
0:16:57 > 0:17:00and very likely pass away in hospital.
0:17:00 > 0:17:02That's not a good way to deal with things.
0:17:02 > 0:17:06- Are you OK under there? - Yeah.- Yeah?
0:17:22 > 0:17:24Because of their frailty,
0:17:24 > 0:17:28older people often have to be operated on within 36 hours,
0:17:28 > 0:17:32which can lead to them taking priority over younger patients.
0:17:32 > 0:17:36If you're in your 90s and you have a fractured hip, you're often
0:17:36 > 0:17:40on the ward and in hospital for much longer than someone who's 70.
0:17:40 > 0:17:43And the demands on the service are massive.
0:17:44 > 0:17:49The hip fracture operation costs around £7,000.
0:17:49 > 0:17:53Last year, Tony and his team operated on 60 patients
0:17:53 > 0:17:55aged over 90 years old.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00As we get older and as we get closer to death,
0:18:00 > 0:18:03we get admitted to hospital more frequently.
0:18:03 > 0:18:05So it's the group we would call the frequent flyer.
0:18:05 > 0:18:08And we know that once you start coming to hospital
0:18:08 > 0:18:12on a monthly basis that you are approaching the end of your life.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15Two weeks after the operation, the patient died
0:18:15 > 0:18:19because of pre-existing heart problems.
0:18:19 > 0:18:23Giving elderly patients a chance of recovery and dignity in the final
0:18:23 > 0:18:26stages of their lives inevitably costs money
0:18:26 > 0:18:29and puts a strain on the NHS.
0:18:31 > 0:18:35But I find it comforting to know we aren't written off as we get
0:18:35 > 0:18:38older, in spite of the costs.
0:18:56 > 0:18:59As with falls, things that seem relatively small can have
0:18:59 > 0:19:03major consequences for someone who is 100.
0:19:03 > 0:19:07Until last year, George made regular trips to a GP
0:19:07 > 0:19:10surgery near his bungalow in Northamptonshire.
0:19:10 > 0:19:12It closed when the doctor retired
0:19:12 > 0:19:15and a replacement couldn't be found.
0:19:15 > 0:19:20It was available, it was here, it was somewhere you felt safe.
0:19:20 > 0:19:24Now it's gone. It's empty. It's a shell.
0:19:24 > 0:19:27I think they just did the wrong thing,
0:19:27 > 0:19:29deserting people like me.
0:19:32 > 0:19:37As well as cataracts, George has diabetes and heart problems.
0:19:37 > 0:19:40His neighbours have offered to drive him to his new surgery three
0:19:40 > 0:19:42miles away in Banbury, but he's been refusing to go.
0:19:44 > 0:19:48His son Michael has invited them around to discuss the situation.
0:19:48 > 0:19:53George needed to have his ears syringed, didn't you?
0:19:53 > 0:19:58And we rang the surgery. They said he'd need to come in.
0:19:58 > 0:20:01- I can't do it any more.- Yes.
0:20:01 > 0:20:02Yes.
0:20:02 > 0:20:05So was it getting from the car to the surgery
0:20:05 > 0:20:07that was particularly difficult?
0:20:07 > 0:20:12It's hard to quite understand why you're so anti going there.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15Do you not have to go for check-ups sometimes?
0:20:15 > 0:20:17It just isn't fair.
0:20:17 > 0:20:19I don't even know my doctor now.
0:20:19 > 0:20:21No matter who assesses me...
0:20:22 > 0:20:26..I'm never, ever going to go up there again.
0:20:26 > 0:20:30Staff from the surgery in Banbury are now regularly visiting
0:20:30 > 0:20:32George at home.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39What I do everyday is I pray to God
0:20:39 > 0:20:41to let me die in my sleep.
0:20:41 > 0:20:43Every day I do that.
0:20:43 > 0:20:44Just make it easy.
0:20:49 > 0:20:52If you're lucky you'll have family nearby to help.
0:20:52 > 0:20:55But most old people don't want to be a burden to their children.
0:20:58 > 0:21:01My whole life I don't want to worry the kids.
0:21:01 > 0:21:06My son is 80. They've got their lives, they must get on with it.
0:21:06 > 0:21:10My son is 77. He's not well himself.
0:21:10 > 0:21:14I don't feel at the moment that I'm a burden to her,
0:21:14 > 0:21:18but I want her to be able to live her life.
0:21:18 > 0:21:21What we on? 75. Get a good score this time.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23Yeah.
0:21:23 > 0:21:28May had a fall earlier this year. It shook her confidence.
0:21:28 > 0:21:31She needed more support from her daughter Sue.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34I've got a wonderful daughter.
0:21:34 > 0:21:39Sue looks after me money, pays me rent and everything.
0:21:39 > 0:21:41That's in her hands.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43And I thank God for her.
0:21:45 > 0:21:47- Yes!- I done it!- Well done.
0:21:47 > 0:21:52At the moment, she's doing all me shopping, me housework...
0:21:53 > 0:21:57And if I hadn't got Sue, I might think to myself,
0:21:57 > 0:21:59"What am I going to do?"
0:22:02 > 0:22:04She's always grateful for what you do
0:22:04 > 0:22:07and she never wants to be a nuisance.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09She's always saying to me, "I don't want to be a nuisance."
0:22:09 > 0:22:12And I tell her she'll never be a nuisance.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15So as long as I can look after her, I will.
0:22:15 > 0:22:17- Right?- Yeah.
0:22:17 > 0:22:22It's not easy for Sue. She's 67 and a grandmother herself.
0:22:22 > 0:22:27One of her 20 grandchildren has just had an accident.
0:22:27 > 0:22:30She's juggling his care with her mother's.
0:22:30 > 0:22:35She's got to look after him, me as well.
0:22:35 > 0:22:37I'm doing what I can for the people I love.
0:22:37 > 0:22:40But we're going to see what we can do
0:22:40 > 0:22:42to ease it for Sue.
0:22:44 > 0:22:50I want to be able to manage it all and I find that is difficult,
0:22:50 > 0:22:52that I can't do all I want to do.
0:22:56 > 0:22:59And I feel sometimes that I'm cut up in lots of little pieces
0:22:59 > 0:23:02because I'm trying to keep everybody happy and of course you can't.
0:23:02 > 0:23:06That I find overwhelming, I think.
0:23:06 > 0:23:10I'm going to put the hairdryer on now, Mum. OK?
0:23:10 > 0:23:13It's hard cos it's not just pleasing other people, too,
0:23:13 > 0:23:16it's pleasing me but I have to come...
0:23:16 > 0:23:20I'm the last on the list, as far as I'm concerned.
0:23:20 > 0:23:22There's another job jobbed.
0:23:25 > 0:23:29Cos it's my mother, you don't feel that you're a carer.
0:23:29 > 0:23:31It's just my mum.
0:23:32 > 0:23:37There are more than 1.2 million unpaid carers in the UK...
0:23:37 > 0:23:41like Sue, aged over 65.
0:23:41 > 0:23:43Thank you.
0:23:46 > 0:23:51It can cause them huge stress. Usually additional help is needed.
0:23:52 > 0:23:55Olivier's carer lives with her
0:23:55 > 0:23:59and leads a team who provide 24-hour care.
0:23:59 > 0:24:02I'm a full-time carer and I've got my own flat here.
0:24:02 > 0:24:06She needs it. It's mainly because of the falls.
0:24:06 > 0:24:10And her mobility is much poorer since her falls.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12So I do the main care work.
0:24:12 > 0:24:15Just to the chair just round the corner there,
0:24:15 > 0:24:18it's all ready for you. Just round the corner here.
0:24:18 > 0:24:21Because we have so many carers, I like to have everything
0:24:21 > 0:24:24written down, especially with different things to do with
0:24:24 > 0:24:26Olivier's personal care.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28Eyesight is holding her back.
0:24:28 > 0:24:31She used to read, she used to go through books galore,
0:24:31 > 0:24:34and I suppose it's been the last year she's not reading as much
0:24:34 > 0:24:36cos her eyesight's failing.
0:24:36 > 0:24:39Even with full-time care for Olivier,
0:24:39 > 0:24:42her family is constantly involved.
0:24:42 > 0:24:45You going to come all the way through to the kitchen?
0:24:45 > 0:24:47- Yes.- Hello!
0:24:47 > 0:24:53My brother and sister and I are on a sort of loop tape of dealing with
0:24:53 > 0:24:59the care issues. And even with the wonderful, wonderful Caroline,
0:24:59 > 0:25:02she can't work alone, so we bring in other people
0:25:02 > 0:25:05and it doesn't always work out as we would wish.
0:25:05 > 0:25:08You never quite know what's going to be around the corner and just
0:25:08 > 0:25:12when you think everything's swimming along,
0:25:12 > 0:25:16another problem arises, either with the carers or with my mother
0:25:16 > 0:25:20herself, because obviously she's very, very, very old.
0:25:20 > 0:25:23I've got you on your cushion, which may feel a bit wibbly on that chair.
0:25:23 > 0:25:25Is that all right?
0:25:25 > 0:25:31And she has, you know, problems of her own. She has health problems.
0:25:31 > 0:25:35If you're 100, your children will be getting on years too.
0:25:35 > 0:25:38Margaret Gilbert is 102.
0:25:39 > 0:25:43I could do with some new ears,
0:25:43 > 0:25:48new eyes and new legs, please.
0:25:50 > 0:25:55- Margaret.- Yes?- Hello, I'm Joan.- Yes. - How nice to meet you.- And you.
0:25:55 > 0:25:59She's a mother of one.
0:25:59 > 0:26:01He's had his ups and downs.
0:26:01 > 0:26:04Now she's a carer, too.
0:26:04 > 0:26:07- What's your name?- I'm Richard. - Richard, hello.
0:26:07 > 0:26:12VOICEOVER: That's because her son Richard is 75 and ill himself.
0:26:12 > 0:26:16We're talking to your mother. Do you want to come and listen?
0:26:16 > 0:26:18- Sure.- OK.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20Richard was a factory worker
0:26:20 > 0:26:23and has always lived with Margaret in their council bungalow.
0:26:23 > 0:26:26He used to help look after her
0:26:26 > 0:26:30but five years ago, Richard was diagnosed with terminal cancer.
0:26:30 > 0:26:33Then the roles were reversed.
0:26:33 > 0:26:39He needs sort of waiting on, which is difficult for me to do now.
0:26:39 > 0:26:42He's got so he can't look after himself.
0:26:42 > 0:26:47The doctors are trying to get him somewhere
0:26:47 > 0:26:49so that I can have a respite.
0:26:49 > 0:26:54It's terribly hard work. He fell out of bed the other night.
0:26:54 > 0:26:57We had a terrible job to get him up,
0:26:57 > 0:27:01- getting him back to bed. - You had to pick him up?
0:27:01 > 0:27:04No, I rung my neighbour, a kind neighbour,
0:27:04 > 0:27:07and she came at one o'clock in the morning
0:27:07 > 0:27:09and helped me move him.
0:27:23 > 0:27:29Margaret is one of 92,000 carers who are over 85.
0:27:30 > 0:27:32INDISTINCT CHATTER
0:27:32 > 0:27:36Richard and Margaret both have professional care teams.
0:27:36 > 0:27:38Richard's are from the NHS
0:27:38 > 0:27:42and the local authority pays for most of Margaret's.
0:27:42 > 0:27:44Barbara comes in three times a week.
0:27:44 > 0:27:47It's so exceptional to meet Margaret
0:27:47 > 0:27:49and to see that she is looking after Richard.
0:27:52 > 0:27:55That amazes me because...because she's a mother
0:27:55 > 0:27:59and the mother instinct comes into "must look after her son"
0:27:59 > 0:28:01and now he's just got worse,
0:28:01 > 0:28:04she just worries herself sick over him now.
0:28:04 > 0:28:08And I can understand it because she can't do anything for him,
0:28:08 > 0:28:12he can't do anything for her, so they're both in limbo.
0:28:13 > 0:28:16Life's pretty hard for Margaret at the moment.
0:28:16 > 0:28:19But her concern for her son is giving her a strong
0:28:19 > 0:28:21sense of purpose in life.
0:28:21 > 0:28:27As we get older, it's good to have a project, a reason to keep on going.
0:28:27 > 0:28:31- It feels like rain. I hope it doesn't.- I hope not.
0:28:31 > 0:28:32For many people,
0:28:32 > 0:28:36having a partner to share their life can really make a difference.
0:28:38 > 0:28:43Earl Cameron is the only centenarian we met to enjoy that companionship.
0:28:43 > 0:28:47He and his wife Barbara got married late on in life.
0:28:47 > 0:28:51We do walk every day, down into town,
0:28:51 > 0:28:56because then we have our mile walk every day.
0:28:56 > 0:29:00Especially when it's nice weather, it's lovely.
0:29:00 > 0:29:06- I met her some 23 years ago. - 23 years ago, that's right.
0:29:06 > 0:29:08I'm now in my 80s.
0:29:08 > 0:29:15It wasn't exactly love at first time but...it turned out to be
0:29:15 > 0:29:17after meeting...
0:29:17 > 0:29:19About two or three times we met.
0:29:19 > 0:29:24And I began to think, "Yes, I could do with this young lady."
0:29:24 > 0:29:28He's kept me young and I've kept him young.
0:29:30 > 0:29:35Earl walks up and down stairs every time we go out and come back.
0:29:35 > 0:29:39I'm the one that has to have the chair to take me downstairs
0:29:39 > 0:29:42and bring me back up.
0:29:42 > 0:29:45We get on very well, I think we're a good match, really.
0:29:45 > 0:29:50I would hate to be on this Earth without a wife.
0:29:50 > 0:29:52Really.
0:29:52 > 0:29:57But having her as my partner... I've found that it gives me
0:29:57 > 0:30:01a great deal of comfort and assurance.
0:30:03 > 0:30:07George's wife Gladys died nine years ago
0:30:07 > 0:30:09after 68 years of marriage.
0:30:12 > 0:30:14It's very hard to think
0:30:14 > 0:30:16you never ever die together,
0:30:16 > 0:30:19and one person's going to be left.
0:30:22 > 0:30:24Surrounded by photographs
0:30:24 > 0:30:28and things that remind you of all the years gone by.
0:30:30 > 0:30:32This one brings back memories.
0:30:32 > 0:30:35Diamond wedding.
0:30:37 > 0:30:39See, she was much taller than I was.
0:30:42 > 0:30:44That's a lovely one, too.
0:30:45 > 0:30:47She's so relaxed there.
0:30:47 > 0:30:53We had a little council house, two up and two down, you know.
0:30:53 > 0:30:57It was opposite a school, which was lively and lovely.
0:30:57 > 0:30:59But everything comes to an end.
0:31:01 > 0:31:03My story is written in one book
0:31:03 > 0:31:06which I wrote a month after my wife died -
0:31:06 > 0:31:09I had that bound in leather and gold.
0:31:11 > 0:31:12I'm very proud of it.
0:31:12 > 0:31:15400 pages, all handwritten,
0:31:15 > 0:31:18and 95 illustrations in the book.
0:31:18 > 0:31:22When we first met, you know, I couldn't believe me luck!
0:31:26 > 0:31:29George spends most evenings alone.
0:31:29 > 0:31:32His children do their best, but they have busy lives.
0:31:36 > 0:31:39TV PLAYS IN BACKGROUND
0:31:53 > 0:31:55TV PLAYING
0:32:01 > 0:32:03That's what I do every night.
0:32:03 > 0:32:06Say goodnight to my wife, always.
0:32:06 > 0:32:09Our visit this evening has been a welcome change.
0:32:09 > 0:32:11I'm exhausted now.
0:32:11 > 0:32:15But I've had a wonderful day with you.
0:32:15 > 0:32:16Wonderful.
0:32:16 > 0:32:18I won't ever forget it.
0:32:27 > 0:32:30Being on your own, it's...
0:32:30 > 0:32:33difficult to explain, but...
0:32:33 > 0:32:36I think these are the worst years of your life,
0:32:36 > 0:32:41when you're left on your own... to cope.
0:32:42 > 0:32:45George's cleaner is a huge support.
0:32:45 > 0:32:51- Hello, Eva.- Hello. How are you? - I've not put me shirt on yet!
0:32:51 > 0:32:56- I'm waiting for you today. - He's very excited about you.
0:32:59 > 0:33:02Eva comes to clean three times a week
0:33:02 > 0:33:04and also helps George with his personal care -
0:33:04 > 0:33:07washing, and sometimes cooking for him.
0:33:07 > 0:33:10- It's still sore, my back. - Yeah, I know.
0:33:10 > 0:33:14I'll cream you later, after wash, yeah?
0:33:17 > 0:33:19She brings tears to my eyes.
0:33:21 > 0:33:24I've got my hearing aid on in the bathroom.
0:33:25 > 0:33:28It's lovely to have something done for you, you know.
0:33:34 > 0:33:36I love coming here.
0:33:36 > 0:33:39He is very nice man,
0:33:39 > 0:33:43and I am happy for help.
0:33:43 > 0:33:46I'm not the sort of person to live on my own,
0:33:46 > 0:33:48to live a life on my own.
0:33:48 > 0:33:50Yet I've been forced to do it.
0:33:50 > 0:33:54My wife always said, "You could never live alone,"
0:33:54 > 0:33:57and she was right. I can't.
0:33:58 > 0:34:01Much as I try, you know, it's impossible.
0:34:05 > 0:34:08I just said, if I'd been younger, I would have married you.
0:34:08 > 0:34:10Oh, yeah!
0:34:10 > 0:34:15You say like that! Ten years younger and you would be married to me.
0:34:15 > 0:34:18Ten years younger you will be still 90!
0:34:24 > 0:34:27The hard truth is that as we grow older,
0:34:27 > 0:34:29we often experience loss.
0:34:29 > 0:34:33In Olivier's case, it's the ability to communicate easily.
0:34:47 > 0:34:49But your brain is working. This is good.
0:34:56 > 0:34:59So how do you deal with it in your mind?
0:35:21 > 0:35:24I, too, know what it's like to have lost something.
0:35:27 > 0:35:29The birdsong here is wonderful.
0:35:29 > 0:35:33Wonderful. And I can hear most of it.
0:35:33 > 0:35:36But there was a sad moment about three years ago, I suppose,
0:35:36 > 0:35:39when I was walking on the downs with my son
0:35:39 > 0:35:43and he turned to me and said, "Isn't the songs of the skylark wonderful?"
0:35:43 > 0:35:47And I said, "I can't hear it."
0:35:47 > 0:35:50And it was a really sad moment.
0:35:50 > 0:35:53Now, of course, what happened was because my hearing was failing,
0:35:53 > 0:35:55I went and got hearing aids,
0:35:55 > 0:36:00so I can now hear a skylark with the help of two hearing aids.
0:36:00 > 0:36:05But it isn't quite the same as hearing the skylark in the raw.
0:36:06 > 0:36:10Isolation can be very damaging to our wellbeing,
0:36:10 > 0:36:13but most people would rather not go into an old people's home.
0:36:13 > 0:36:15Is there another solution?
0:36:15 > 0:36:20I'm on my way to Whiteley Village, which is in leafy Surrey.
0:36:20 > 0:36:23I've only heard about it, but it's got a fine reputation.
0:36:24 > 0:36:29100 years ago, an enlightened philanthropist, William Whiteley,
0:36:29 > 0:36:32made provision for the elderly poor.
0:36:32 > 0:36:34My. Big gates.
0:36:35 > 0:36:37It's a park!
0:36:37 > 0:36:41It looks wonderful. It's like visiting a stately home.
0:36:41 > 0:36:44Of Whiteley's 500 current residents,
0:36:44 > 0:36:47eight are over 100.
0:36:53 > 0:36:57It's rather like... It's a garden village. It's...
0:36:57 > 0:36:59It's really impressive.
0:36:59 > 0:37:01What I want you to do is just roll your shoulders
0:37:01 > 0:37:04and just feel where your body's at.
0:37:04 > 0:37:07Whiteley's offers a wide range of clubs and activities
0:37:07 > 0:37:10from exercise classes to woodwork
0:37:10 > 0:37:12and learning French.
0:37:12 > 0:37:14Le chat. The cow!
0:37:14 > 0:37:16- La vache.- La vache.
0:37:16 > 0:37:18C'est bien, Dorothy. La vache.
0:37:18 > 0:37:22This French class includes three 100-year-olds.
0:37:22 > 0:37:24Oui, le renard!
0:37:24 > 0:37:27How do I get in? How do you qualify? What's the answer?
0:37:27 > 0:37:30The answer is, you have to be of limited means.
0:37:30 > 0:37:33- So what are limited means?- Limited means - really all your income
0:37:33 > 0:37:35is predicated on a state pension
0:37:35 > 0:37:37and that's virtually all you have to live on.
0:37:37 > 0:37:39And certainly no capital reserves.
0:37:39 > 0:37:41- Do you live on your state pension, then?- You do, absolutely.
0:37:41 > 0:37:45But your housing costs are paid through housing benefit.
0:37:45 > 0:37:48Virtually everybody who lives here is eligible for that
0:37:48 > 0:37:50because they are of such limited means.
0:37:52 > 0:37:58Centenarian Freda came here 30 years ago with her late husband.
0:37:58 > 0:38:00- How's that?- Smashing.
0:38:00 > 0:38:02That's OK? You look great.
0:38:02 > 0:38:05So how old are you, Freda?
0:38:05 > 0:38:08Next month I will be 104.
0:38:08 > 0:38:11- 104.- Yes.- What does that feel like?
0:38:11 > 0:38:13Like 104!
0:38:14 > 0:38:17Well, you're still full of laughter and enjoyment, aren't you?
0:38:17 > 0:38:19Well, if you've got your brain...
0:38:19 > 0:38:22What brain I had, I've got,
0:38:22 > 0:38:25and I have a great sense of humour.
0:38:27 > 0:38:29Are you going to have a party for your birthday?
0:38:29 > 0:38:30Yes.
0:38:32 > 0:38:35But of course, there's a long waiting list to get in here.
0:38:35 > 0:38:39It would be an almost impossible cost for the state to offer
0:38:39 > 0:38:42this sort of provision to all our very elderly.
0:38:45 > 0:38:48So let's talk money.
0:38:48 > 0:38:51Most of the centenarians I've met making this programme
0:38:51 > 0:38:54said that their pensions and state allowances
0:38:54 > 0:38:56allowed them to live comfortably,
0:38:56 > 0:38:58partly because their needs are modest.
0:38:58 > 0:39:01Diana Gould is one of them.
0:39:02 > 0:39:06Once a week, I get a taxi and go to the hairdresser.
0:39:06 > 0:39:08THEY EXCHANGE GREETINGS
0:39:08 > 0:39:13About once a month, I get my nails done.
0:39:13 > 0:39:16Those are my two extravagances.
0:39:16 > 0:39:20Now, I really don't know anything about the money matters.
0:39:20 > 0:39:25My son, he deals with all the paperwork.
0:39:25 > 0:39:27And obviously I'm not starving!
0:39:27 > 0:39:29Mum is very fortunate
0:39:29 > 0:39:32because she's supported, effectively, by the state.
0:39:32 > 0:39:34She has a state pension with appropriate benefits.
0:39:34 > 0:39:37That is sufficient to keep her in this flat
0:39:37 > 0:39:40and she manages on her state support, which is wonderful.
0:39:41 > 0:39:43But the ageing population
0:39:43 > 0:39:46means the state's costs are swelling every year.
0:39:46 > 0:39:50In 2015, the government paid out nearly £90 billion
0:39:50 > 0:39:52in state pensions alone.
0:39:52 > 0:39:57George Emmerson is paying for Eva's help out of his own pensions.
0:39:57 > 0:39:59He's happy to, because he can afford it.
0:39:59 > 0:40:02So you're putting out a little bit of money all the time.
0:40:02 > 0:40:04I pay over £100 a week.
0:40:04 > 0:40:07- £100 a week!- Yeah.
0:40:07 > 0:40:10Financially, I have no worries whatsoever.
0:40:10 > 0:40:13George worked for the tax office for 30 years
0:40:13 > 0:40:16and paid into a civil service pension
0:40:16 > 0:40:17as well as his state one.
0:40:17 > 0:40:21But he's lived more than 40 years in retirement
0:40:21 > 0:40:23and will have received far more from his pensions
0:40:23 > 0:40:25than he ever paid into the schemes.
0:40:25 > 0:40:29And this is the big problem facing us. Affordability.
0:40:29 > 0:40:32When many younger people are struggling with their finances,
0:40:32 > 0:40:34can we carry on like this?
0:40:34 > 0:40:38We've had the state pension in some form for the best part of 100 years.
0:40:38 > 0:40:40Of course, at the time,
0:40:40 > 0:40:44people weren't living that long beyond the state pension age,
0:40:44 > 0:40:46so the costs were containable.
0:40:46 > 0:40:49The answer is, more of us who are able
0:40:49 > 0:40:51need to work longer.
0:40:51 > 0:40:54The government recently announced that within 20 years
0:40:54 > 0:40:57the state pension age will go up from 65 to 68.
0:40:57 > 0:41:01Some experts believe that isn't enough.
0:41:01 > 0:41:04Because politicians have not pushed forward
0:41:04 > 0:41:07increases in state pension age,
0:41:07 > 0:41:09which are clearly unpopular with people,
0:41:09 > 0:41:11they've not pushed them forward
0:41:11 > 0:41:14at the rate at which they should have been pushed forward.
0:41:14 > 0:41:16We're playing catch-up all the time.
0:41:16 > 0:41:19It's way behind where it should be.
0:41:22 > 0:41:25It's not just the cost of pensions. The cost of care, too,
0:41:25 > 0:41:28is taking its toll on the state and on families.
0:41:28 > 0:41:33Everyone gets medical care free, paid for by the NHS.
0:41:33 > 0:41:35But if we have social needs -
0:41:35 > 0:41:38that help with dressing, washing, feeding -
0:41:38 > 0:41:41then we have to meet the cost ourselves
0:41:41 > 0:41:45out of any assets we have more than £23,000.
0:41:45 > 0:41:48And that may include your home.
0:41:50 > 0:41:53Rising costs are a problem even for the comfortably off,
0:41:53 > 0:41:55like Olivier Bell.
0:41:55 > 0:41:57"I'm writing to ask you to cancel my standing order
0:41:57 > 0:42:00"to account number blah-di-blah-di-blah."
0:42:00 > 0:42:03Can you sign that? I've put "yours sincerely" and put your name there.
0:42:03 > 0:42:07Slightly running out of funds for Olivier's hair.
0:42:07 > 0:42:11There's some money still in some shares that she has, or an ISA,
0:42:11 > 0:42:12but I need to keep on top of it
0:42:12 > 0:42:14because the other day, one of the carers rang up and said,
0:42:14 > 0:42:17"We've gone to get some money out and there's nothing left."
0:42:17 > 0:42:19- In the bank.- In the bank.
0:42:19 > 0:42:22So I immediately bunged £1,000 in,
0:42:22 > 0:42:24but we need to keep an eye on it.
0:42:24 > 0:42:27It's about £4,500 a month we pay out.
0:42:27 > 0:42:30She gets £4,000 a year from the state,
0:42:30 > 0:42:35but pays £50,000 herself for her care every year.
0:42:35 > 0:42:36It's not cheap at all.
0:42:36 > 0:42:40However, I think it's considerably less
0:42:40 > 0:42:43than if we were spending money
0:42:43 > 0:42:47to have her in a very top-notch care home.
0:42:47 > 0:42:48Er, I think we could be spending
0:42:48 > 0:42:52almost double what we're spending at the moment.
0:42:52 > 0:42:57There is an account that she made for me and my sister and my brother
0:42:57 > 0:42:59which is meant to be sort of like an inheritance,
0:42:59 > 0:43:01but in fact we'll just take that out
0:43:01 > 0:43:03and that'll keep her going a few more years, I think.
0:43:16 > 0:43:17Quite rich.
0:43:17 > 0:43:19- Getting poorer by the minute.- Yes.
0:43:19 > 0:43:22Very true.
0:43:26 > 0:43:29- Hello!- Hello, Mr Emmerson. Can we come in?- Yes.
0:43:29 > 0:43:32George is happy with the help he gets three days a week
0:43:32 > 0:43:33from his cleaner Eva,
0:43:33 > 0:43:36but his son thinks he needs more professional care.
0:43:36 > 0:43:38It is stressful.
0:43:38 > 0:43:43The way he lives at the moment, by himself,
0:43:43 > 0:43:47relying on casual care - maybe that's coming to an end.
0:43:47 > 0:43:52Adult social services are here to see if and how they can help.
0:43:52 > 0:43:55- Usually to get down there I hold on to this chair.- Right.
0:43:55 > 0:43:57We can look at speaking to
0:43:57 > 0:43:59an occupational therapist,
0:43:59 > 0:44:03and asking them to come out and have a look
0:44:03 > 0:44:06- at what could be of help for you. - Yeah.
0:44:06 > 0:44:10There are so many people getting to be old these days.
0:44:10 > 0:44:12They all need help.
0:44:12 > 0:44:16- That is true, George, and... - It's going to happen to everybody.
0:44:16 > 0:44:20- Everybody in this room.- Yeah.
0:44:20 > 0:44:23Nevertheless, we are looking at what would make a difference,
0:44:23 > 0:44:25a positive difference to you as well.
0:44:25 > 0:44:28You did mention that you feel lonely.
0:44:28 > 0:44:31I get... Eva speaks very good English and, er...
0:44:33 > 0:44:36..I'm able to talk to her practically every day,
0:44:36 > 0:44:40except Saturdays and Sundays, are the two loneliest days.
0:44:40 > 0:44:44Have you been in contact with the GP surgery
0:44:44 > 0:44:47at least for advice with regards to your condition?
0:44:47 > 0:44:50Surgery's now... They've done the dirty on us,
0:44:50 > 0:44:52moved the surgery to Banbury.
0:44:52 > 0:44:55- I can't get there any more.- Right.
0:44:55 > 0:44:59I can't go out on me bike now because I'm afraid of the kerb.
0:44:59 > 0:45:01- Yes.- I'm scared.
0:45:01 > 0:45:03I'm frightened of falling and breaking summat
0:45:03 > 0:45:05and then when the hospital decides
0:45:05 > 0:45:07you can't look after yourself any more...
0:45:07 > 0:45:13George, nobody's going to make you do what you don't like to do
0:45:13 > 0:45:15or what you don't want to do.
0:45:15 > 0:45:16Nobody.
0:45:17 > 0:45:20I don't want to leave her.
0:45:20 > 0:45:24That's why I'm hoping Eva will be able to help.
0:45:24 > 0:45:27But Eva's... Eva's a cleaner.
0:45:27 > 0:45:28She's not a carer.
0:45:28 > 0:45:31- Although she's a carer and... - She's not a carer.
0:45:31 > 0:45:34- Sorry.- She's a cleaner. - A cleaner, sorry.
0:45:34 > 0:45:35Although she's a cleaner
0:45:35 > 0:45:39and probably you built up a good relation with her,
0:45:39 > 0:45:43- er...- At the moment, I want to do it on my own, with Eva.
0:45:45 > 0:45:48I don't want to do it with anybody else.
0:45:48 > 0:45:51And she's quite willing. I will pay her more.
0:45:51 > 0:45:56- Right.- I don't need any help from the council
0:45:56 > 0:45:58with carers or anything like that.
0:45:58 > 0:46:02- As long as you are happy with that. - Yeah.
0:46:02 > 0:46:07I'm quite willing to pay any of my savings extra to her.
0:46:07 > 0:46:09See you.
0:46:14 > 0:46:19My instinct would be to make sure Eva understood her position.
0:46:19 > 0:46:22She's a lovely lady, who does her very best around the place,
0:46:22 > 0:46:25but she's not a professional carer.
0:46:25 > 0:46:30A professional carer working for a caring organisation.
0:46:30 > 0:46:33If George needs help, he will get it.
0:46:33 > 0:46:37Nevertheless, the financial pressure will be always there.
0:46:37 > 0:46:42In the last period of time, we've noticed an increase in the people
0:46:42 > 0:46:46relying and needing support.
0:46:46 > 0:46:49I can't predict how things will evolve,
0:46:49 > 0:46:54but obviously what I can tell you is that the pressures are tremendous
0:46:54 > 0:46:58on the limited resources that we have.
0:46:58 > 0:47:02For the moment, Eva will continue giving George the help he wants.
0:47:02 > 0:47:05The local authority has suggested further help,
0:47:05 > 0:47:07but it would be means-tested.
0:47:09 > 0:47:13But with advancing years, not all of us can stay in our own homes.
0:47:13 > 0:47:15If you're over 90, there's an increasing chance
0:47:15 > 0:47:19of developing dementia and needing formal care
0:47:19 > 0:47:21in a specialist home.
0:47:21 > 0:47:23But the number of homes is going down
0:47:23 > 0:47:26and the need for them is going up.
0:47:27 > 0:47:31Spring Mount is a small, family-run, 25-bed home
0:47:31 > 0:47:33based in Heaton in Bradford.
0:47:33 > 0:47:37We specialise in looking after people with dementia.
0:47:37 > 0:47:40Our oldest resident is 90.
0:47:40 > 0:47:43Jack was a lift engineer by profession.
0:47:43 > 0:47:45He developed severe dementia in his eighties.
0:47:48 > 0:47:51Now that he's 90, the disease has taken his power of speech.
0:47:51 > 0:47:53HE VOCALISES
0:47:54 > 0:47:58His brother Brian also has dementia
0:47:58 > 0:48:01and has recently joined him at the home.
0:48:01 > 0:48:04- Jack, stand up. - Very good, very good.
0:48:06 > 0:48:07It costs at least £700 a week
0:48:07 > 0:48:11to provide social care for dementia patients in a home.
0:48:14 > 0:48:16Those with enough money must pay for themselves.
0:48:20 > 0:48:23For those who can't, like Jack and his brother,
0:48:23 > 0:48:25the local authority has to pay.
0:48:27 > 0:48:29But their budgets have been squeezed
0:48:29 > 0:48:32and many specialist care homes are closing down.
0:48:33 > 0:48:35More beds are needed.
0:48:35 > 0:48:40So if that continues and there's a growing ageing population,
0:48:40 > 0:48:43it's... It is worrying.
0:48:44 > 0:48:48I think smaller homes will continue to close. Definitely.
0:48:48 > 0:48:50Who's that?
0:48:50 > 0:48:53HE VOCALISES
0:48:57 > 0:49:00Margaret is facing up to life alone.
0:49:00 > 0:49:04Her son Richard, who lives with her, has been taken to a hospice
0:49:04 > 0:49:06to help manage the pain from his cancer.
0:49:06 > 0:49:12Ambulanceman just came in and picked his bags up and took him out.
0:49:13 > 0:49:19And when he got to the hospice, he rung me to say he was there.
0:49:20 > 0:49:24And it looked a very nice place,
0:49:24 > 0:49:27and he was quite happy and I was not to worry about him.
0:49:27 > 0:49:32So now I just wait till I hear something else
0:49:32 > 0:49:35about how he's got on.
0:49:35 > 0:49:38Hello, Margaret, it's only me.
0:49:38 > 0:49:39MARGARET LAUGHS
0:49:41 > 0:49:43- You all right, darling?- Yes.
0:49:43 > 0:49:47- How is Richard today?- All right. - Is he?
0:49:47 > 0:49:48I know you was worried about him.
0:49:48 > 0:49:52- He had diarrhoea, that was the only trouble.- Oh, did he?- Yes.
0:49:52 > 0:49:57Obviously he's gone into the hospice now, he's in good hands.
0:49:57 > 0:50:01- Yes.- You haven't got to worry about anything that Richard does.
0:50:01 > 0:50:04- I know you worry.- They'll sort him out, won't they?
0:50:04 > 0:50:05So you can stop worrying.
0:50:05 > 0:50:09- I won't worry, but I will miss him. - Of course you do! He's your son.
0:50:09 > 0:50:11You're bound to miss him.
0:50:11 > 0:50:14I shall miss him tonight when I go to bed.
0:50:14 > 0:50:18- But you can't carry on with him here as he was.- No, I can't, no.
0:50:18 > 0:50:22- Because he was very, very much in pain.- Yes.
0:50:23 > 0:50:27But a parent never stops worrying, no matter their age.
0:50:30 > 0:50:34When Barbara's been here, she's just said,
0:50:34 > 0:50:38"Don't worry yourself, look after yourself."
0:50:38 > 0:50:41Well, you can't do that, can you?
0:50:43 > 0:50:46So it gives you a feeling of guilt.
0:50:46 > 0:50:50You shouldn't be looking after yourself
0:50:50 > 0:50:54when somebody else is so ill and they need your attention.
0:50:54 > 0:50:56But what can you do?
0:50:57 > 0:50:59What's to be will be.
0:50:59 > 0:51:05And you've just got to get over it the best way you can.
0:51:05 > 0:51:07But shall I tell you something?
0:51:07 > 0:51:11I would rather I put him to rest while I'm here
0:51:11 > 0:51:14than I should leave him behind alone.
0:51:15 > 0:51:19That doesn't sound natural for a mother to say that, does it?
0:51:19 > 0:51:21But that's how I feel.
0:51:24 > 0:51:28If I appear to grieve a lot after he's gone...
0:51:30 > 0:51:33..it'll just be for the loss of him.
0:51:35 > 0:51:38And I don't think it's going to be very long.
0:51:41 > 0:51:45I don't want to see him here suffering pain
0:51:45 > 0:51:48any longer than he has to.
0:51:49 > 0:51:50We'll both go.
0:51:50 > 0:51:53Him and then me.
0:51:54 > 0:51:56But I'm not going yet.
0:51:59 > 0:52:02I've got a lot more to do first.
0:52:02 > 0:52:07It never occurred to me at any time that I'd get this far.
0:52:07 > 0:52:1260 or 70, I thought that would be it. But I'm still here.
0:52:12 > 0:52:15The oldest man was 117.
0:52:15 > 0:52:19So I've only got 16 years to go, haven't I?
0:52:19 > 0:52:22If I'm here, I'll be here. But if not, I'll be gone.
0:52:22 > 0:52:25No, nobody can stop it.
0:52:26 > 0:52:28The older you get, the more you know
0:52:28 > 0:52:31that you're in the final stretch of life.
0:52:31 > 0:52:33May Bareham and her daughter Sue
0:52:33 > 0:52:37regularly visit the family's burial plot.
0:52:37 > 0:52:41I'm with them a lot in my mind, yes.
0:52:41 > 0:52:45- Especially my husband and, of course, my little boy.- Let me see...
0:52:45 > 0:52:49- Your son died when he was 14?- Yes.
0:52:49 > 0:52:52That was a very sad time of my life.
0:52:52 > 0:52:55Do you feel religiously about your dying?
0:52:57 > 0:52:58Well...
0:52:58 > 0:53:03I... I don't say I'm looking forward to it,
0:53:03 > 0:53:06but I thank God for the life I've had,
0:53:06 > 0:53:10and I hope he'll just let me go to sleep peacefully.
0:53:11 > 0:53:16And, er...I'll be pleased. I'd be pleased to go.
0:53:18 > 0:53:22- Now, she's 104?- Yes.
0:53:22 > 0:53:25You're in the middle, you've got children, grandchildren,
0:53:25 > 0:53:27so you're facing in both directions.
0:53:27 > 0:53:29Does it pose problems?
0:53:31 > 0:53:35Only in the fact that we can't spend the time
0:53:35 > 0:53:38that my husband and I would like away.
0:53:38 > 0:53:41I'm 67, my husband is 76.
0:53:41 > 0:53:46Really, it's a time when we really need to spend time together
0:53:46 > 0:53:48and we can't just take off.
0:53:48 > 0:53:51That begs the question, you have to think in your mind
0:53:51 > 0:53:54quite consciously, "When will she die?"
0:53:54 > 0:53:58I mean, Mum, I suppose, in a way, is waiting.
0:53:58 > 0:54:03Every day when she wakes up, she'll say to herself, you know,
0:54:03 > 0:54:05"Oh, I'm still here."
0:54:05 > 0:54:07And when I ring her in the morning,
0:54:07 > 0:54:11if it takes a long time before I get an answer,
0:54:11 > 0:54:16I then start to think, "Ah. Is today the day?"
0:54:18 > 0:54:22For Margaret, the day has come to say goodbye to her son Richard,
0:54:22 > 0:54:24who died at the hospice.
0:54:26 > 0:54:28- Margaret.- Hello.
0:54:28 > 0:54:32- How are you coping?- Are you coming in?- It's sad to be here.
0:54:32 > 0:54:37She now faces life on her own for the first time, at 102.
0:54:37 > 0:54:42- It seems strange to survive your own child.- Yes, it does, it does.
0:54:42 > 0:54:47But I believe I've been given these extra years for that purpose.
0:54:47 > 0:54:50- Here, it's your brother now. - Oh, is it?- Yeah.
0:54:50 > 0:54:53- Hello, John.- My dear...- How are you?
0:54:54 > 0:54:56- All right?- Not so bad.
0:54:56 > 0:54:59My family are all long-livers.
0:54:59 > 0:55:01Don't get up, dear.
0:55:01 > 0:55:07My father's brother lived to be over 100.
0:55:07 > 0:55:09Hello, Margaret.
0:55:10 > 0:55:13We were both old together, weren't we?
0:55:13 > 0:55:18I used to worry about him being left behind.
0:55:22 > 0:55:25I do miss him very much.
0:55:25 > 0:55:31My memories of him going to school
0:55:31 > 0:55:34and starting work...
0:55:37 > 0:55:41A very good child, he was.
0:55:42 > 0:55:45You can't choose your life, can you?
0:55:45 > 0:55:49You just have to accept it as it comes.
0:55:49 > 0:55:54- It was lovely, wasn't it? It went very, very well.- Yes.
0:55:54 > 0:55:58I should be able to make the most of what's left.
0:55:58 > 0:56:00I'm sure I shall.
0:56:02 > 0:56:05Me having lived so long,
0:56:05 > 0:56:08I can't understand why.
0:56:08 > 0:56:12Yes. Strange feeling, really.
0:56:26 > 0:56:29I've learnt a lot from the centenarians I've met.
0:56:29 > 0:56:32I've learnt that they value their independence,
0:56:32 > 0:56:34they want comfort and security.
0:56:34 > 0:56:37They're made unhappy by loneliness
0:56:37 > 0:56:40and are not distressed by the idea of death.
0:56:40 > 0:56:43There'll be many more centenarians in future.
0:56:43 > 0:56:46And more birthday cards from the Queen.
0:56:46 > 0:56:49At 105, Diana gets another one.
0:56:49 > 0:56:53I think your outlook, your attitude towards life...
0:56:53 > 0:56:56You have one life - live it.
0:56:56 > 0:57:00Oh, hello! You don't look any different! You look the same!
0:57:00 > 0:57:03I don't feel 105.
0:57:03 > 0:57:05Cheeky!
0:57:05 > 0:57:07You learn something every day.
0:57:09 > 0:57:11Look at that!
0:57:11 > 0:57:14If I come across a new word,
0:57:14 > 0:57:17gosh, it's made me for that day.
0:57:17 > 0:57:20And your diablo, see your diablo?
0:57:20 > 0:57:22Time goes very quickly.
0:57:22 > 0:57:25- You look so marvellous!- David!
0:57:25 > 0:57:29I don't think any of us is prepared for this ever-extending lifespan.
0:57:29 > 0:57:33How we adapt to this new reality is a test.
0:57:33 > 0:57:36You're not allowed to leave until the table's cleared.
0:57:37 > 0:57:41It's a test for the state and for families.
0:57:42 > 0:57:44Are we prepared for the responsibility of
0:57:44 > 0:57:46looking after our parents as well as our children?
0:57:48 > 0:57:53And for ourselves, are we ready for the possibility of living past 100?
0:57:53 > 0:57:56Thank you all for coming.
0:57:56 > 0:57:59Come next year - perhaps they'll make me another party. Who knows?
0:57:59 > 0:58:02LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE