Charli XCX: The F-Word and Me

This programme contains some strong language

I want to show you what it's really like to be a young woman

in the music industry. How do I know?

Well, I'm a singer, I'm 23 and I write songs for other artists too.

Girls are ruling the charts like never before,

so it feels like a great time to be a woman in pop.

The F word - that's feminism - is everywhere.

Young kids are being blasted with what feminism is

because Beyonce's standing in front of a massive screen

that says "Feminism" on it, and that's great.

But is the male-dominated music industry really changing?

When I am assertive, I'm a bitch.

When a man is assertive, he's a boss.

And why are our bodies under more scrutiny than ever before?

I literally grew up embarrassed of the fact I would grow vagina hair.

I'm spending the next couple of months out on the road

and I want to use that time to find out what feminism really means,

and to see if girls are finally ruling the world.

My first stop this summer is Glastonbury.

I've been on the road now for 18 months

touring my latest album, Sucker,

so life on the tour bus is getting pretty familiar.

It's quite busy today.

I feel like I just woke up, so...

I think it's busy and then the show is going to be really good.

My dad's coming. I don't know if he's going to get in.

He was like, "I'll meet you at the door."

"OK, well, we'll see!"

My show isn't until five o'clock but the rest of my day is going

to be taken up with photo shoots and interviews.

Am I faking it, then?

But hey, festivals are for having fun,

so I doubt the questions will be too difficult.

What would you bring to a festival? What would be your essential items?

It would just be vodka.

Have you remembered your bra this time?

Yep, you did hear that right.

I'm currently not wearing one but will be wearing one later.

I'm maintaining eye contact at this moment.

OK. Good, very professional of you. Thank you.

# Let's keep doing it like we're doing it

# Doing it like we're doing it now

# Baby. #

-Yeah! So good!

-Thank you.

Have you got your amazing all-female band with you at Glastonbury?

They've been here for, like, three days.

My all-girl band always gets a mention and that's probably

because female musicians are still in the minority.

I think it's important to stand up and be counted,

and there are plenty of other women here who feel the same way.

Think different, think feminist.

But what does feminism mean to them?

Feminism, I don't know.

I guess it's like being yourself, being comfortable in your own skin.

I'm just about empowering women and people in general.

I don't want to get too specific just because I'm a woman,

I think everybody is equal. I think that's the point.

There's so many juxtapositions on what a feminist should be

and therefore what you should think, that it took me a while to think,

none of that matters, actually.

They all basically believe in equality for women,

it's just you have different beliefs within that.

I think feminism is asking yourself questions in every single decision

-you are making.

-If it's you, do it,

-but don't do it...

-Because they tell you to do it.

If you don't know yourself, people are going to put you in boxes,

but if you know yourself and what you want, you can say, "This is what I want."

People like Charli are an incredible ambassador for that,

that she is just literally breaking all of the rules

and doing whatever she wants, and that kind of shows

these young kids that you can do that as well,

and it's totally fine to be who you are

and not who you think you should be.

I'd love a double vodka-Red Bull, and a water.

You can't always do whatever you want,

especially when you're playing a tea-time gig,

never mind one that's being televised live to millions of people.

You can swear as much as you want in Sucker, but then if you can try...

Not swear.

-..in songs, you will get more air time.

-Guys, how long do we have?

20 minutes before you should be ready.

Let me just get outfits out. Wear these socks.

This.

One, two, three, got four shirts. Yes.

I actually brought my old school uniform.

I think I'm going to wear a shorter skirt. It's a miniskirt.

Cos sex sells! I'm kidding.

Na na-na na na, yeah.

I feel like for any artist Glastonbury is a huge deal,

and there's a lot of pressure to put on a great show.

This is how we do it. Go hard or go home.

MUSIC: Sucker by Charli XCX

What's up, Glastonbury!

CHEERING

# You said you wanna bang

# Well

# Fuck you

# Sucker! #

Put your fucking middle fingers up, Glastonbury!

You fucking ready?

# I don't care

# I love it

# I don't care. #

# I think we better do it like we're doing it now. #

# Going to the discotheque

# Getting high and getting wrecked

# I don't wanna go to school

# I just wanna break the rules. #

# So outrageous

# Just like we're famous. #

# I'm so fancy

# You already know

# I'm in the fast lane

# From LA to Tokyo. #

CHEERING

Thank you, Glastonbury!

I'm Charli XCX. Peace out!

Charli XCX, straight off the John Peel Stage.

That has got to feel good, surely?

Yes! I had such a good time and the crowd were really good,

so many cute kids.

I felt bad because I flashed my pants!

I don't know, it was fun, I had fun, though. It was really good.

These things happen, it's Glastonbury,

it's totally legitimate.

Flashing may be a festival staple

but I know exactly how the tabloid press are going to react to my set.

Every photograph they decide to use

is me with my vagina out or whatever, a crotch shot.

And there are people who are really mad at that, "How dare you do this!

"You are untalented and no surprise, another woman! That woman!"

It's always like that, "That woman doing that thing!"

But then it's like, I'll wear something totally different

or I'm covered completely.

They'll be like, "What a hipster! Covering up like a boring woman!"

You know? So it's kind of like whatever, it's funny.

Female pop stars are under constant press scrutiny.

Fashion, relationships, body size, it all goes under the microscope.

The media may be resorting to the same old sex sells rubbish

but behind the scenes, I think the industry is changing.

I think when you're looking at the music industry in isolation,

especially pop music,

women being really vocal about being in control of what they do

and actually that being the case is kind of a new thing.

I think that people just don't want to ask questions about that

and sometimes are afraid of that and I think it's great.

I think people sometimes should be afraid and should be intimidated,

because I think a woman with power is an incredible thing, you know?

# I rule the world

# I-I rule the world... #

Fierce women may be all over the charts

but behind the scenes it can still be a bit of a boys' club.

My friend Liz knows how important it is to stay in control of your image.

# When I rule the world then I'm gonna make you sweat

# Dog collar round your neck

# On your knees and scrub the deck... #

I started out in the industry when I was 12 years old.

It's predominately run by middle-aged men,

so it's quite funny when you try to explain what you want

to do in your style, and a lot of men just don't get it,

but the girls love it, so they should just listen to us,

because we know.

When I shot my video, my choreographer was like, "Just think of Justin Bieber."

I was like, "All right."

I feel like my decisions that I'm making are working,

so it's kind of like with everything that you achieve,

you kind of prove people...

Not prove them wrong, but prove that you're right

and that you know what's best for you.

# When I rule the world then I'm gonna make you work

# Ring! ring! Stay alert, keep on pushing till it hurts... #

It's so important to build a strong team around you

and knowing when to bring in help.

I'm definitely not the kind of person that says,

"Oh, I can do everything on my own,"

because that's just impossible. I know I can't.

I have to reach out to the right people

and bring in the right mix and that creates the magic.

A better way to do that when I'm with girls.

# Till I tell you to, till I tell you to

# Till I tell you to stop. #

Exactly. I always wanted to be in Josie and the Pussycats

so having three amazing girls in my band is a dream.

This is basically what it's like every gig.

The boys are pretty used to it.

Anyway, time to head back out on the road.

Yes! No!

Or we would do if we could get back on the tour bus.

Where have you been? Young lady!

Shooting a Scottish Widows advert.

I used to tour with two guys.

Wilkie, my tour manager, used to be my drummer.

Don't get me wrong, it was really nice

but I think touring with girls, it's like a big oestrogen fest.

It's always really nice to embarrass the boys you're with.

Be like, "Oh, my God, I'm on my period!"

They get....

It can quite often be a boys' club, can't it?

-Music in general.

-It's still the first thing that's mentioned.

It's like, "Charli and her all-girl band,"

-rather than "Charli and her band."

-That's the thing, that's the point.

Nobody would ever say that, Lianne La Havas and her all-male band,

people don't say that.

It's my favourite thing about a show,

when we come on stage and someone will come over and be like,

"Oh, my God, I really want to be a drummer now!"

Or "My daughter's really into drums, she's 12, and it was really cool

"for her to see someone else doing it."

That's one of my favourite things.

But then you've had a couple of weird experiences. It was in college.

Oh, my God, that was so funny!

We played this show and the support band, the drummer,

was sitting outside and he had his practice pad out

so I thought I'd join him, and I got my practice pad out

and we were running the same rudiments, and he was like,

"Oh, so are you with Charli's crew?" "No."

"Are you her PA?" "No."

"Are you dating someone in the band?" "No."

He literally ran through about 10 things before he whittled it down.

Make up? So he was like, "So what do you do?"

"I'm in the band." "Oh, OK."

Whilst you're drumming.

Whilst I'm doing the same thing that he's doing.

He just couldn't comprehend it.

It sadly still is a thing, but it does feel really empowering.

Which is why it's so good to be up there

and showing other girls that it's completely normal and fine.

Debate!

Young kids now are being blasted with what feminism is

because Beyonce is standing in front of a massive screen

that says feminism on it, and that's great,

because when I was younger I wasn't conscious of that at all.

I was just like, "Yeah, Britney!"

I think Baby One More Time was the first-ever music video I watched.

MUSIC: Baby One More Time by Britney Spears

Britney kind of invented the super pop star.

She was cute but she also had sex appeal and she knew it.

# Oh, baby, baby

# How was I supposed to know? #

I wanted to dress like Britney Spears when I was younger.

I wanted to have those sparkly pink hair ties for the school uniform

and everything. I just thought she was like the best-dressed kid ever.

# Tell me, baby, cos I need to know... #

She's so young as well.

# My loneliness is killing me... #

My love for Britney Spears

and '90s pop as a whole is definitely not ironic.

I was super into the Spice Girls

and I think girl power was my generation's introduction to feminism.

It's like an easy message and I suppose for Spice Girls fans

in the '90s, it's like, get along, be friends.

Friendship is important and that's like a cool thing.

It's basic but I don't care.

Like, it made me feel special when I was younger

and I'm sure it made a lot of other people feel special too.

The idea of overanalysing the Spice Girls is such a sad thing for me

because they were so celebrated and joyous.

MUSIC: Say You'll Be There by Spice Girls

What's really funny about this video is that in the main set-up,

they're all just dancing completely on their own,

completely out of time, but it's so good,

and I love the styling on this video. Everyone looks great.

I went through many different phases when it came to my favourite

Spice Girl, apart from Posh, but now I think Posh is my favourite.

I feel like Posh would rock a beret.

That would be like a classic Posh move.

The Spice Girls had a message

but in some ways they were still reduced to stereotypes.

Female pop stars don't want to fit into neat little boxes any more,

or caravans, for that matter.

I'm sorry, I'm so worried you're going to get a vagina shot.

Feminism!

Marina and the Diamonds, hello.

I wanted to talk to you about whether you think the question,

what's it like to be a woman in the music industry,

-is a really annoying question.

-For me, it's not annoying.

I do still think it's relevant.

Actually asking the question has made the topic very popular.

For me personally,

there are a lot of things that I think still have to happen

for women in music.

MUSIC: Froot by Marina and the Diamonds

Marina's latest album Froot was a worldwide success

and it's the first album where she has taken complete creative control.

When it came to the Froot album campaign,

from an outsider's perspective,

that seemed like something very much driven by you.

Was that easy for you to do or was that something that you had to...

Fight is such a strong work, but fight your label?

You're absolutely right,

and actually I've never said this before,

but it took so much fighting for the album to come out,

but I think you just have to explain to people who you are

and sometimes that's hard, especially when you're starting out.

You have all these other things to think about.

It's only on this third record that I have been able to do that

and feel very calm and confident about it.

# Primadonna girl

# Would you do anything for me?

# Buy a big diamond ring for me? #

Changing your image or sound can be a risky business for a pop star.

# Pop that pretty question right now, baby... #

When you put out Primadonna Girl,

and people began to criticise you and saying you sold out,

do you think that was more amplified because you're a woman?

I am not sure,

but if it happened to a male artist, I think

people would probably just say, "Oh, you're shit now."

-"You're shit, mate."

-As opposed to lots of grim trolls online.

Everyone was calling me a sell-out,

that I'd lost everything that was original about me.

I feel like I'm going through that right now with this album.

I did like an insight meeting, stats, and it was very interesting.

I found that I think a lot of people find me very intimidating.

-Really?

-Yeah!

I'm like, "Oh, God!"

-How do they find that out?

-They did market research where...

Honestly, it's really soul destroying, actually. It really is.

Do you ever think about your output online

and do you ever think about your audience,

which is a lot of young girls and gay guys?

I think you have a responsibility as a human being,

whether your fan base is young or not,

but only to a certain extent.

You are human and are going to do stuff that not everyone agrees with.

You're always going to, sadly, sometimes leave a small portion

of fans behind, but I think with my fan base

and perhaps with yours as well,

I feel like it's less about the genre of music you make.

It's more about you as a person, and being honest

and being able to have that relationship with your fans.

I know that when you become a pop star or a musician,

there is always this element of responsibility,

and I'm aware of that but it's not something I particularly care about,

which might be something I regret saying, but right now it's not.

It freaks me out, if I'm honest, because I know I make

loads of mistakes and I always will, but I think the way

the music industry is now,

it's so much about what's going on on the internet

and I think if you're wise,

you have to learn to just really take all of that with a pinch of salt.

When I was younger, I was really worried about it

because I wanted to please everyone, but that's such an unrealistic thing.

Oh, my God, I look so friendly!

I don't like everybody and I know everybody doesn't like me

and I'm very much at peace with that.

That's healthy.

Hey!

No matter how honest and direct

your relationship with your fans may be,

you do still have to think about your image.

And often it's what pop stars wear that gets the feminist debate raging.

-How are you?

-Nice to meet you finally.

So these three are yours.

I love the lining as well.

Oh, my God.

XCX.

Wow.

-I love this.

-You love it, yeah?

It's so awesome. Do you think the skirt should sit more...?

Coming in a little bit, there.

I don't really care about people who ask me

what type of feminist I am, or if I think it's valid for me

to be a feminist because I wear a short skirt.

I think it's just stupid.

Stupid, stupid conversation that's like...

pointless.

And I'm not the only one whose feminist credentials are being questioned.

When people ask the way Rihanna dresses or Miley Cyrus dresses,

that's a bad example for girls, and that makes her a bad feminist,

it's that whole argument of that's... absolute bullshit, basically.

I think both of those artists are really empowering and artistic

and daring women.

I think they're projecting a different way to be sexy

and a different way to be feminine,

which I think is really important for young girls.

I don't know if you saw the new Rihanna video but I love it.

# Yayo, yayo

# Moo-la-lah

# Yayo

# Bitch better have my money! #

OK, I know lots of people have had a big problem with this video

and the use of violence against women in pop promos can feel really

disturbing, but I think this film speaks to a bigger story.

Rihanna is dismantling society's idea of what a pop star should be,

ie perfect, polished and usually white.

She plays a Tarantinoesque hitwoman with her very own girl gang.

It's a revenge fantasy, it's a beautiful piece of art,

but it's also a powerful statement of intent.

You can't push me around and you can't make me be what I'm not.

And I also just kind of like that Rihanna's just a bad bitch,

and I think that's also a good enough reason.

I don't know why I'm carrying a razor around in my bag.

It's not real life to be perfect.

That's not real.

I like pop stars who fuck up and make mistakes, you know?

It's just cooler, rather than robots.

-And completely airbrushed.

-Yeah, totally.

-OK, you're happy with this one?

-I love it.

I'm so excited to perform in this.

-It was so nice to meet you!

-I'm such a fan

and thank you so much for making this stuff for me.

I'll send you pictures as soon as we're on tour.

Yes, please. You look incredible in it. So exciting.

Bye-bye, everybody. Bye, upstairs!

It's August and I'm finally in the US for my tour.

America is the birthplace of manufactured pop,

but even here, the tide is starting to turn,

with more and more female artists breaking the mould.

OK, cool, so Lollapalooza with Ryn Weaver right now.

-Hi!

-Hi.

-How's it going?

Pretty good.

I was on your Twitter and was reading some tweets

that you'd written about armpit hair. Like, I find it

crazy that people get so mad!

And like lifting bros on Twitter that, like, their photo

is them taking a selfie in the mirror, and they're like,

"You're a disgrace to nature!" And I'm like, "I am nature."

This is nature, what are you doing?

I think it's funny.

That's the thing, for me, it's almost entertaining,

but I don't know. I just don't really care.

That's what it is, and if I wake up in the morning and I feel

-like shaving my armpits, I'll do it.

-You feel sexy as well.

I feel sexy, and that's the thing. I feel sexy being natural

and I feel sexy having dudes, girls, whoever the fuck,

-think that is dope.

-I'm happy that you've got great armpit hair.

-Thank you. I love my armpit hair.

-I think it's great,

but do you think that's liberating and inspiring young girls,

cos I definitely see that.

Like, I think you...

like, Miley is also someone who doesn't shave her armpits.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I think it's really...

For young girls who especially grow up with, like,

People magazine and OK.

-And porn.

-And porn.

And I think it's really amazing.

This is the way you're meant to look to be sexy.

I think it's amazing that people like you guys are really...

Well, you just get to do whatever the hell you want to do with your

own body, because it's your body and it's not property of public domain.

And it's your right

and it's your choice to do whatever you want with it.

And I just hope that little girls that see me, or see this,

or see that, or see a girl who's got a little happy trail

or see, anything, it's just makes you more human and it makes them

feel more human.

It makes them feel like, "I'm allowed to be normal."

I literally grew up embarrassed of the fact that

I would grow vagina her.

Because I was like, "Oh, these girls are so pretty."

And do you remember when you started shaving?

-And you were like, "Is that how it's supposed to look?"

-Yeah, it was a mess!

-There's so much self-consciousness around who you were.

-Yeah.

And then always wanting to hide

and so afraid of this thing that is literally like the centre of...

Of femininity. And in other ways. I mean, if you're trans, and you're...

You know. There's all sorts of things.

But to me, this guy makes me feel...

Pretty good. And I don't want to be ashamed of anything on my body.

Amen.

CHEERING

You feeling bad?

'Oh, I almost forgot I was at work.

'Back to it.

'Photos, signings, gigs.'

Get up, get up!

'You know the drill.'

# Electric lights. # Come on!

# Blow my mind. # Get up, get up!

# I feel all right. # Get up!

# And never stop, it's how we ride

# Coming up until we die

# You catch my eye. #

-Thanks for taking the time to do this.

-No worries.

# Bitch, you want to fly

# I'm so alive. # Hey!

# Never stop, it's how we ride. #

I'm sure people ask you all the time, but will you marry me?

# I don't wanna go to school

# I just wanna break the rules

# Boys and girls across the world

# Putting on our dancing shoes

# Going to the discotheque

# Getting high and getting wrecked

# I don't wanna go to school

# I just wanna break the rules. # My flies keep coming undone!

# I don't wanna go to school

# I just wanna break the rules. #

Because I, like... I'm on your Twitter all the time.

# Going to the discotheque

# Getting high and getting wrecked

# I don't want to go to what?

-# I just want to break the rules. #

-Do it!

MUSIC: Break The Rules by Charli XCX

Get up!

SHE SCREAMS

Come on, come on!

That's right!

CHEERING

# Get my guitar

# Sunglasses on

# So light it up. # Come on!

# And never stop, it's how we ride

# Coming up until we die

# I don't wanna go to school

# I just wanna break the rules

# Boys and girls across the world

# Putting on our dancing shoes

# Going to the discotheque

# Getting high and getting wrecked

# I don't wanna go to what?

# I just want to break the rules! #

SHE SCREAMS

CROWD CHEER

Put your fucking hands up!

# Na-na-na-na na-na na-na na-na-na-na! #

At the back, at the back! Come on!

# Na-na-na-na na-na na-na na-na-na-na!

Hey!

'Oh, my God, that was so hot.'

Bit warm!

I'm exhausted.

I feel like I'm starting to get a really good picture

of how the industry is changing for female artists.

But I want to find out what it's like for women behind the scenes.

I'm off to meet Lizzy Plapinger, my label exec in the US.

Lizzy runs Neon Gold Records with her business partner, Derek Davies.

And manages to have time to make music as one half of Ms Mr as well.

# Came to make a connection

# Force myself in a dimension. #

When you think of music industry, record label person,

you don't think of...

Like, awesome killer gold dress,

bright red hair, like, bad-ass bitch.

Do you ever feel like you ever had to face any kind of shit

because of who you were and because you're a woman?

I remember the first couple of meetings we took.

After we'd been running Neon Gold for two years

and we started to get major label offers to do subsidiaries

or joint ventures,

and it was SO interesting and eye-opening

for the first time to be taking meetings

and to be with old, white men who had been in the industry

for years and years and years,

who it felt like didn't have a sense of what was happening on the ground,

and so many meetings people just wouldn't even look me in the eye.

They would literally only talk to Derek the whole time.

-That's crazy.

-It was SO offensive.

Did you feel like they were like,

"Oh, this man is the guy who's running the show

-"and this is his girlfriend or something"?

-Totally.

I think people didn't understand what my role in the company was

and so it was directed at Derek and that was...

It fucking pissed me off. It was really, really upsetting.

We'd leave meetings and he would completely acknowledge what just went down.

He'd be like, "We're not fucking working with them.

"If they're not going to acknowledge we're a team, they're not worth our time."

That was a very easy way to cut the list in half.

# Nights like this

# I become afraid

# Of the darkness in my mind

# Hurricane. #

I feel like I was one of very few women when we first started

and I'm struggling to think of other women who were at our position,

and I do think that's a hard conversation to have too,

to be like, "Yes, there are more women in the industry

"but they get to a certain level and then there's a barrier to entry."

Why is it so much harder to get to a certain point in your career

and then not take that next step to that top, top executive level?

And I'm not totally sure why that is

and I hope that that continues to change in the coming years.

It feels like there has to be some sort of epic change

and I don't know if that's specifically tied

to a woman being in power or not but

I just feel like that's representative

of this need for whatever's in place right now to sort of shift.

Yep.

Somewhere between Chicago and Minneapolis,

it was my birthday and I hope I'm a bit wiser,

but maybe I shouldn't have partied QUITE so hard last night.

# Right away from Holloway

# I said, Mum, this isn't a holiday

# Listen up I ain't coming back

# Till I can fill the shack up with all gold plaques... #

When you're talking about feminism and pop,

I think it's just as important to speak to the men in the industry,

so it's lucky I'm on tour with some.

No, not that one.

Jack Antonoff and his band, Bleachers. Awesome.

Like me, Jack writes with lots of female artists

and he knows how hard this industry can be on women.

High five!

Jack Antonoff, we're on tour together. Do you like that?

-I love it.

-Great. I like it too.

You've worked with some incredibly talented, powerful females

-from Taylor Swift...

-I love Taylor.

I've been very vocal about that. She's just...

I do think that working with her

and experiencing the way that people digest her has given me a lot

of insight to the differences of being a woman or a man in music.

-How come?

-No-one wants to believe that she writes the songs.

-Yeah.

And that's such crap.

I feel like... Kanye makes a record or something, it's just like,

"You're Kanye. You're a genius,"

and then Taylor does and I've done so many interviews where people

are like, "Is she really as good a writer as everyone says?", and I'm like, "Yeah!"

If I worked with Kanye, no-one would be like, "Is he really as genius

-"as people say?"

-Yeah.

-It's just a known thing

and I think that you can really see how the world sees women artists

by the questions you get asked in the press, more than anything.

And very often it can be something offensive that two days later you're like,

-"Oh, that was actually kind of fucked up, now that I think about it."

-Yeah.

Did you ever see that Nicki Minaj video?

-Oh, the bitch versus the boss?

-Yeah.

-I loved that!

But when I have an ego, I'm a bitch!

So I'll be that.

You're ... walking round the ... game with the biggest ... ego

you can't tell ...

But when I stand up for myself?

No. No. No way.

When I am assertive, I'm a bitch.

When a man is assertive, he's a boss.

-He bossed up.

-He bossed up!

-Yeah, he bossed up.

No negative connotation behind "bossed up",

but lots of negative connotation behind being a bitch.

Do guys in the music industry get a bad reputation?

No, I feel like...

I think in history men have done a lot of crappy things, you know?

-Yeah.

-And I think that...

I try to see it way more just on an individual level.

I don't think there's a stereotypical man in music

or woman in music.

I just know who I feel more comfortable with.

I just get on better with women.

The last thing I want to ask you,

obviously there are now so many amazing women

at the forefront of the music industry.

Do you feel like this is a step forward?

I think the amount of women is a great thing just because

-it means there's all the different kinds.

-Yeah.

When you have more of something you have more variety.

So, I think growing up in the '90s,

I think that it was a lot more rigid.

A female pop star had to look a certain way and act a certain way

and had to be very sweet and very attractive and like girl-next-door.

Now you or Beyonce or Taylor,

these are all just such different kinds of artists and performers.

Some of them are super in-your-face and super intense.

Some of them are really quiet and just making their art,

and it's just... I think it's wonderful

because what it says to young people growing up is,

"You could do anything."

Because when there's lots of different things happening

in popular music, it speaks more to the people

because people are different. People have different colours of skin

and different haircuts and different attitudes and beliefs

and all these things, so the more diversity and variety there is,

the more a young kid in Arkansas or Manchester or whatever

is going to say to themselves, "Oh, I can do whatever I want."

Hear, hear, sister! Cool.

-I feel sick.

-Oh, babes.

# Vicky's so ill.

# And she's going to throw up. #

Is Vicky all right?

-LAUGHING:

-Is that my sick bag?

Is this where I come to be sick?

You'll be all right.

CHEERING

Minneapolis was good.

CHEERING

I think I'm still feeling my post-birthday partying.

My voice is a little husky, a little sexy.

Vicky nearly passed out. Gingie nearly passed out.

Debbie nearly passed out.

You looked like you were going to die tonight.

SHE SIGHS

You're traditionally supposed to be just happy all the time

and OK with it all the time and not complain,

being a musician or in the limelight,

but I just can't really do that.

I can't fake it very well.

It takes such a talent and such skill to be able to befriend everybody

and become this memorable, happy person.

Cos it always affects me.

If I'm feeling down, it will affect my show.

I perform differently.

I'm way ruder. I'm way more rude on stage. I'm like a brat.

And I don't want to get to the point where I hate it for ever,

so I just really have to take a break,

so I cancelled the second leg,

which was definitely a very selfish decision for me to do

because obviously I know there are a lot of fans who bought tickets

and were really looking forward to it,

and also it was a co-headline tour with Jack as well,

so it's difficult for him and for his band and all of the crew,

but I spoke with Jack about it and he was very understanding.

He knew where I was coming from.

Obviously I can only apologise to the people that I let down cos it sucks.

When you like...

I remember when I was going to see the Spice Girls

and then Geri left the day before.

I was like, "Ugh. Come on."

So, yeah. It wasn't easy. I felt bad.

And the thing is, I make my own decisions, good and bad.

To me, that's what feminism is all about.

The past few months have been a bit of a rollercoaster

but I'm starting to see why it's so important to keep asking questions,

even if there aren't any easy answers.

Being a woman and talking about being a woman in this specific industry

is such a confusing and layered subject

and even just when we talk about the most simple questions ever,

sometimes I just find myself going so deep down this tunnel

and I'm not even sure if I'm answering the right questions

any more because there's so much to say.

But I just hope that this documentary

makes a lot of people see how much women do behind the scenes

with their own careers and how much we're aware

of everything that's going on in the industry,

and really how these women who stand on stage singing songs

aren't just puppets but are businesswomen, as well.

I think everybody is aware that this question of,

"What is it like to be a woman in the music industry?"

is important, but everybody is also kind of sick of it

and I think that maybe the better question is,

"What's it like to be an artist?"