Hacker's Crackers

Welcome back. How awesome was that? We are having a lovely festive time

in here and in fact we are providing a messaging service for you today.

Sending messages for your friends and family. He'd centre in loads

already. Keep them coming on the e-mail. Let's read some now. Oh,

just like every day. He we go. Lydia, good afternoon to you. She

would like to shout out to her brother George as he has just heard

his head and she would like to say she hopes your head gets better. Get

well soon. This one comes in from Saskia who wants to say a very Merry

Christmas to this CBeebies the presenters, everyone watching the

show and my older sister who lives in Nottingham, I know she's watching

and I don't get to see how often, so I Love you, Lola. This one comes

from Daisy. My shout out goes to my friend Grace who gave me the best

Christmas card ever. I'm intrigued. What is on the card? Keep your

e-mail coming in to the e-mail address. Get permission and include

about number and we could be bringing you up and you could be

giving out your messages to the world live on the television. As

well as messages, we will also determine which of these people is

the brainbox of the channel. It's round one of the CBeebies the

Sledgend. We are going to journey through snow and ice but that is the

least of your worries, my friend. You have 60 seconds to answer as

many Christmas questions as you can. This afternoon, we will find out who

the trees Sledgend is. Grab the rains but they're in mind our

reindeers are temperamental. It could get out of hand. Oh, no. Can I

just say, that wasn't the reindeer? Naomi, how many ugly sisters of

Cinderella have? Two. What source is a traditional accompaniment to

Turkey? Cranberry. Which also wrote a Christmas Carol? David -- Charles

Dickens. What is both did a snowman's nose made out of? A

carrot. It is a button. What is the chemical formula of snow? It's a

trick question. Think of water. H two O? How many large are in the

solemn deck the halls? Eight. Nine. What year did Queen Elizabeth II do

have first message on television? Sorry, that was wrong. X factor

winner Sam Bailey scored a number one with which track? I have

absolutely no idea. Let's find out what your school was. The lovely

young man scored a total of five. A shiny number five. He's a robot. He

doesn't know. How do you feel about that? Five is not too bad. It could

have been worse. Ben is playing later. She did well there. It is

time now for a proper festive treat, expensive props, big-name stars,

special effects, we could have got anyone, as you can probably tell. It

is time for the 2016 CBeebies the panto. It is Hack And The Beanstalk.

Once upon a Time in a magic kingdom, they let the young man called Hack.

Hack and his mum lived in poverty, about three miles north of Ormskirk.

They were also poor. So very, very poor. Oh, woe is me. I can only

afford a tablet with a 12 inch screen and my car is in for its MOT.

Hack, I am trying to eat my Faberge eggs in peace. Oh, mother, one day I

know my wildest dream will come true. It already has. Look. No, not

that dream. No, the one about me becoming marginally rich and

successful. Well, there is only one thing for it. We will have to raise

the cash by selling Mildred to market. Come on in, brisket. Bring

your ideas in here. I'm sorry, hacker, I'm not happy about this.

I'm a professional performer these days. Yes am and what about me I'm

supposed to be reaching for the mean. You are, you are reaching for

his mean. I'm paying you encourage. He's already had seven this morning.

Oh, please. I'm so sorry. It's time to get milking. I'll do it. Pull the

other one. Something's gone terribly wrong. Why? What's she left in the

bucket? A slightly smaller market. This cow is useless and the stress

is clearly making you ill, mother. No, no. I'm just feeling a little

pale. Let's get this cow to market and make all the cash. Follow me, my

bovine beauty. And so Hack went to market. And yes, it is spelt

correctly. And when he had finished marking the word it, he went to

market. Who wants to buy a cow? I will give you ?4000 for it. Well,

that's a no-brainer. What if I offered you a mansion, a swimming

pool, a speedboat and all the riches you could ever ask for? But what's

in it for me? Where am I going to find a buyer I can trust. He is one.

Before we go one, I am required by law to tell you that I am head of

evilness. But you are also the nicest woman on telly. I'll trust

anything you say. In that case, will you sell me that cow for this team

of worthless beans? I'm not falling for that. I'll throw in this piece

of used during gum as well. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. You

actually have bought to below average, very underpaid actors. Oh,

the smell... So, Hack ran home to tell his mother

all about it. You see, it is the word it, it is a joke, I marked it.

And then he told her about the worthless beans. How could you have

been so stupid? This is what I think of your beans. Yeah, well, I kind of

expected a beanstalk to inexplicably sprout from that point just then.

Never mind, Caulker, at least I've still got this piece of chewing gum.

Oh! It was beanstalk flavour. By Duminy. Well, well, there's only one

thing for it. You'll have to climb to the top of this creature and seek

out fortune from there. And so I shall, my love. Come back in a bit

and I will have done that. I'll try not that, Caulker.

-- I'll try that now, Cocker. How amazing was that? Why was I

played the back end of the cow though? And why did I have to be big

game? Because you were great at it, that's why. You can catch the next

part just after 5pm. You don't want to miss that. And Odd Squad will be

on our screen very scene. Third, what is going on Hacker T Dog? Add a

little treat, my old chum accordion George. The game is simple today. We

have got to callers on the line. They will listen to a piece of music

and guess which Christmas songs he is playing. On the line first, we

have got Olivia. Hello. Are you all right, Cocker? You have got to guess

what song he is playing on the accordion. But first, are you

looking forward to Christmas, Olivia? Yes. What is the thing you

are looking forward to the most out of everything? Presence. We have got

another call and the line as well. We are also joined by Alvin. How are

you? Hello. What is your favourite thing about Christmas? I love

Christmas presents. We all love Christmas present. Are you enjoying

Hacker's Crackers so far? Yes. Olivia, guess what this man is

playing. What do we think that was, Olivia?

No idea. That's because it was rubbish. We will pass it over to

Alfie. What was he playing? I'm dreaming of a white Christmas. You

are correct. How did he get that? Here is the next one. Please play

it. All right, stop. We don't pay you by

the note. Alfie, what was he ruining on his accordion? Santa Claus is

coming to town. He was. That is to live in the road. Olivia, you must

redeem yourself with the third of domination. Guess what he is playing

on that monstrosity. Take it away. You have to be a wizard to guess

that, it so what was it? I wish it could be Christmas every day. We

have got one more. Alfie, you must guess what the fourth atrocity he

I actually don't know the name of this one. I don't know it. Frosty

the Snowman. Yes! It is pre-1 to Alfie. Sadly, Olivia -- it is 3-1 to

Alfie. Sadly Olivia you didn't win. What you do get is a disappointed

look, Olivia. Oh, that's lovely though. You were very good. You also

get a big old way for the winner. Have you enjoyed playing, guys? Yes.

Lovely did speak to you. Very Christmas. Thank you by doing the

sprouts. What amazing festive genes there on the accordion. We have got

loads of great stuff still to come. We will be showing the second part

of our panto, Hack And The Beanstalk, and we will be finding

out if Ben Shires can beat Naomi Wilson, but right now, guys, come on

in, because it's time for the Odd Squad

But back to Otto and me. We work for an organisation run by kids

that investigates anything strange, weird and especially odd.

Our job is to put things right again.