Browse content similar to A Child's Christmases in Wales. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!
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# Silent Night | 0:00:02 | 0:00:05 | |
# Holy Night | 0:00:05 | 0:00:09 | |
# All is calm | 0:00:09 | 0:00:14 | |
# All is bright... # | 0:00:14 | 0:00:18 | |
# Silent Night | 0:00:18 | 0:00:21 | |
# Holy Night... # | 0:00:21 | 0:00:24 | |
'Christmas 1983 was much the same as every other year round our way, | 0:00:24 | 0:00:29 | |
'with the oh so sweet voices of the Cadwallader boys and the imminent arrival of my father's family. | 0:00:29 | 0:00:35 | |
'You could never be sure my uncles would be on time. In fact, they rarely were. | 0:00:35 | 0:00:40 | |
'Uncle Huw was usually detained because he had had an argument with another driver, | 0:00:40 | 0:00:45 | |
'and Uncle Gorwel, well, he didn't have a car, or a bike. | 0:00:45 | 0:00:49 | |
'In fact, we were never absolutely confident he'd still have the use of both his legs. | 0:00:49 | 0:00:54 | |
'They were due at our house by 3.30, but my mother began getting the place ready well before that, | 0:00:54 | 0:00:59 | |
'and by "well before that", I mean September.' | 0:00:59 | 0:01:01 | |
Alphabetical order. | 0:01:03 | 0:01:06 | |
Cream, then lilac. | 0:01:06 | 0:01:10 | |
'These days, they call this kind of thing obsessive compulsive disorder.' | 0:01:11 | 0:01:15 | |
Who's been using the sink? | 0:01:15 | 0:01:18 | |
'At that time, it was known as housekeeping. | 0:01:18 | 0:01:21 | |
What's it going to look like when they all turn up and the sink's wet? | 0:01:21 | 0:01:24 | |
Do you want them to think our family's washing its hands all the time? What are we? Robbers? | 0:01:24 | 0:01:31 | |
Might as well be talking to myself here. | 0:01:33 | 0:01:36 | |
She is talking to herself. | 0:01:36 | 0:01:39 | |
One day, it will be me sitting around with my feet up. | 0:01:44 | 0:01:48 | |
-I'm not sitting around, I'm watching a film. -What are you watching? | 0:01:48 | 0:01:52 | |
-Close Encounters Of The Third Kind. -What's with that? | 0:01:52 | 0:01:56 | |
Aliens come down, cause a bit of bother, go home again. | 0:01:56 | 0:01:59 | |
-Any good? -I didn't think much of it to be honest. | 0:01:59 | 0:02:05 | |
Unrealistic. | 0:02:05 | 0:02:07 | |
# Hallelujah | 0:02:07 | 0:02:10 | |
# Hallelujah... # | 0:02:10 | 0:02:15 | |
Not the most exciting verse, this one. | 0:02:18 | 0:02:21 | |
Wasn't too bad when it was just the two brothers. | 0:02:21 | 0:02:24 | |
Didn't I tell you we'd regret the day when Shirley Cadwallader had quads? | 0:02:24 | 0:02:28 | |
'Mum had been through eleven Hoovers in the past five years. | 0:02:28 | 0:02:32 | |
'When she went into Rumbelows, she just asked for "the usual". | 0:02:32 | 0:02:37 | |
CLOCK CHIMES | 0:02:45 | 0:02:48 | |
-Your brothers are late. -They'll be here. Probably the traffic. Gets busy Christmas Eve. | 0:02:48 | 0:02:54 | |
# ..Hallelujah! # | 0:02:54 | 0:02:57 | |
DOORBELL RINGS | 0:02:57 | 0:02:59 | |
Carol singers! Settle up! Got a lot to get round. | 0:02:59 | 0:03:01 | |
If your uncles were the Three Wise Men, the baby Jesus would still be waiting for them now! | 0:03:01 | 0:03:06 | |
Ah! | 0:03:09 | 0:03:11 | |
Merry Christmas, Hywel, Boys. How are your parents? | 0:03:11 | 0:03:14 | |
Merry Christmas. That's £5.20, please. | 0:03:14 | 0:03:17 | |
£5? You're joking! | 0:03:17 | 0:03:19 | |
You heard Hark the Herald Angels, that £3.80, and Silent Night is £1.40. | 0:03:19 | 0:03:24 | |
I thought the spirit of Christmas was you give whatever you can. | 0:03:24 | 0:03:26 | |
Yes, we obviously agree with that, but we do have to balance it with turning a profit. | 0:03:26 | 0:03:31 | |
Er, that's £5.20, please. | 0:03:39 | 0:03:43 | |
Merry Christmas. | 0:03:43 | 0:03:45 | |
Same to you. | 0:03:46 | 0:03:48 | |
We'll be back Christmas Eve next year, around 3.15pm. | 0:03:48 | 0:03:53 | |
-Right, boys, let's go, let's go, let's go. -I blame the Tories. | 0:03:53 | 0:03:57 | |
'Dad was always annoyed having to pay for things. | 0:04:01 | 0:04:03 | |
'At church, he only put money in the collection plate if the vicar did a good joke in the sermon.' | 0:04:03 | 0:04:07 | |
-£5 that cost me. -Oh. | 0:04:07 | 0:04:09 | |
Unbelievable. | 0:04:09 | 0:04:11 | |
Still, I suppose it's Christmas, eh? | 0:04:11 | 0:04:13 | |
-Come here. -Oh, get out, stop your nonsense, we haven't time for that, | 0:04:13 | 0:04:17 | |
your brother will be here in a minute. Put the kettle on. | 0:04:17 | 0:04:20 | |
DOORBELL RINGS | 0:04:21 | 0:04:24 | |
Oh! | 0:04:24 | 0:04:25 | |
'Uncle Huw was dad's older brother.' | 0:04:28 | 0:04:31 | |
-Merry Christmas! -'He ran one of the biggest carpet firms in Wales | 0:04:31 | 0:04:34 | |
'and was now involved in one of the country's most bitter divorces.' | 0:04:34 | 0:04:38 | |
Bren! | 0:04:38 | 0:04:39 | |
'One of his favourite phrases was "All's fair in love and war".' | 0:04:39 | 0:04:44 | |
'Another was "I hate my wife".' | 0:04:44 | 0:04:47 | |
Merry Christmas one and all. | 0:04:47 | 0:04:50 | |
Apart from one. One exception, in a blouse and high heels, eh, boy? | 0:04:50 | 0:04:54 | |
Hey, Maurice has been looking forward to seeing Owain all week. | 0:04:54 | 0:04:58 | |
'Maurice had hardly ever spoken in the six Christmases I could recall. | 0:04:58 | 0:05:02 | |
'He didn't have to. Uncle Huw talked plenty.' | 0:05:02 | 0:05:05 | |
So I successfully sued him for £7,500. Damages. | 0:05:05 | 0:05:09 | |
That's the last time anyone will steal anything from my doorstep, eh? | 0:05:09 | 0:05:13 | |
Now, on to me. | 0:05:13 | 0:05:16 | |
Started with a bang. | 0:05:16 | 0:05:18 | |
-Got a conservatory built. £3,500. -What is a conservatory exactly? | 0:05:18 | 0:05:23 | |
It's like a garden, but indoors. | 0:05:23 | 0:05:25 | |
They reckon by 1990 most people will be living in conservatories rather than houses. | 0:05:25 | 0:05:30 | |
Sounds lovely. Carpets are selling well then, Huw? | 0:05:30 | 0:05:33 | |
Yes, like hot cakes. Did you hear the ad on the radio? | 0:05:33 | 0:05:37 | |
If you want a carpet, buy one from us. | 0:05:37 | 0:05:40 | |
Oh, good, that is. | 0:05:43 | 0:05:45 | |
Why haven't you got an ad on the radio, Geraint? | 0:05:45 | 0:05:48 | |
Traffic wardens don't normally advertise on the radio, Brenda. | 0:05:48 | 0:05:51 | |
Yes, we're sitting pretty financially. | 0:05:51 | 0:05:55 | |
Despite his mother's best efforts. | 0:05:55 | 0:05:57 | |
She spends like water, doesn't she? She pours it all down the drain, doesn't she? | 0:05:57 | 0:06:02 | |
I said your mother's a waste of space, isn't she? | 0:06:06 | 0:06:08 | |
Geraint, why don't you go down the phone box and call Gorwel? He's nearly half an hour late. | 0:06:14 | 0:06:19 | |
-Haven't you got a telephone fitted yet? -No. No need. | 0:06:19 | 0:06:22 | |
Perfectly good public telephone only minutes away. | 0:06:22 | 0:06:25 | |
'Dad always enjoyed a good walk, even in the coldest weather. | 0:06:44 | 0:06:49 | |
'Most mornings we walked two miles to school. | 0:06:49 | 0:06:53 | |
'It was only a mile away, but he went a long way round on purpose. | 0:06:53 | 0:06:57 | |
'Even putting the number in took quite a while. | 0:07:22 | 0:07:26 | |
'To dial an international number, you'd have to put most of the day aside.' | 0:07:26 | 0:07:30 | |
Hello, is Gorwel there? | 0:07:38 | 0:07:41 | |
Right-o. | 0:07:43 | 0:07:45 | |
-All that walking and he wasn't there. -Well, never mind. | 0:07:54 | 0:07:59 | |
Had a nice chat with his flatmate. | 0:07:59 | 0:08:01 | |
-Why can't people have their own phones? -Sorry? | 0:08:03 | 0:08:06 | |
Why can't people just have a tiny little phone? | 0:08:06 | 0:08:09 | |
So you could fit it in your pocket and take it everywhere you go? | 0:08:09 | 0:08:12 | |
-HE CHORTLES -Ah, kids! | 0:08:12 | 0:08:15 | |
-You should make him put a phone in, Bren. -Oh, you know Geraint. | 0:08:17 | 0:08:21 | |
Anything new, he's suspicious. | 0:08:21 | 0:08:23 | |
Phones, ovens, inside toilet. Outside toilet, even. | 0:08:23 | 0:08:28 | |
-How do you manage? -The neighbours have put a party line. I go in there and use that sometimes. | 0:08:28 | 0:08:33 | |
There's no privacy with party lines, though. You hear all sorts of gossip. | 0:08:33 | 0:08:36 | |
Keep ourselves to ourselves round here. We're not gossips. | 0:08:36 | 0:08:41 | |
All I know is that Mrs Evans is having an affair with the man who came round to do the grouting. | 0:08:41 | 0:08:46 | |
They talk Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays and he calls her "Sexy Nick". | 0:08:46 | 0:08:50 | |
Yes, well, you should definitely make him put a phone in. | 0:08:50 | 0:08:52 | |
You've got to embrace new technology. | 0:08:52 | 0:08:55 | |
Do you know what I got this year? | 0:08:55 | 0:08:57 | |
-A toaster that can do four slices at once. -Oh! | 0:08:57 | 0:08:59 | |
But then mum moved out, and I lost my appetite. | 0:08:59 | 0:09:03 | |
I can eat four. | 0:09:03 | 0:09:06 | |
Ah, here's Gorwel. | 0:09:11 | 0:09:13 | |
'Uncle Gorwel was dad's younger brother. | 0:09:13 | 0:09:17 | |
'He'd had a chequered past. He was now having a chequered present.' | 0:09:17 | 0:09:21 | |
HE COUGHS | 0:09:21 | 0:09:23 | |
-Oh! -Here he is. | 0:09:23 | 0:09:25 | |
Compliments of the season. | 0:09:25 | 0:09:27 | |
-'Uncle Gorwel was a bit like Father Christmas, in that we only saw him once a year.' -Huw. | 0:09:27 | 0:09:34 | |
Gorwel? | 0:09:34 | 0:09:35 | |
Who's having a whisky then? | 0:09:35 | 0:09:38 | |
You are, I should imagine. | 0:09:38 | 0:09:41 | |
'But he was unlike Father Christmas in that he drank whisky for breakfast | 0:09:41 | 0:09:45 | |
'and had once been detained overnight for streaking at the Royal Welsh Show.' | 0:09:45 | 0:09:50 | |
I managed to hitch a lift here in the end, back of someone's van, like. | 0:09:50 | 0:09:54 | |
Who was it? | 0:09:54 | 0:09:56 | |
I'm not sure. | 0:09:56 | 0:09:57 | |
They didn't know I was there. | 0:09:57 | 0:09:59 | |
-How are you keeping then, Gorwel? -Oh, not bad! Not bad at all. | 0:09:59 | 0:10:04 | |
No run-ins with the law recently. No more fights with lollipop ladies. | 0:10:04 | 0:10:09 | |
HE CHORTLES | 0:10:09 | 0:10:11 | |
-It's been a fairly quiet year. -So, where you living? -I've got a nice little place down by the coast. | 0:10:11 | 0:10:16 | |
-You bought it? -Not bought it bought it, more like a rental. | 0:10:16 | 0:10:20 | |
What do you mean "like a rental"? | 0:10:20 | 0:10:23 | |
Well, I'm living in someone else's place, but it differs from a rental | 0:10:23 | 0:10:27 | |
because the owners don't technically know that I'm there, like. | 0:10:27 | 0:10:30 | |
-You're squatting? -If you want to call it that. | 0:10:30 | 0:10:35 | |
Still, I expect it's a nice house, though, is it? | 0:10:35 | 0:10:38 | |
It's not a house house exactly. | 0:10:38 | 0:10:40 | |
-Flat? -Aquarium. | 0:10:40 | 0:10:43 | |
So, you're squatting in an aquarium? | 0:10:43 | 0:10:47 | |
That's about the size of it. But it's a good aquarium, mind. | 0:10:47 | 0:10:51 | |
Got a shark. | 0:10:51 | 0:10:52 | |
Anyway, enough here. | 0:10:54 | 0:10:56 | |
Gorwel's ship's about to come in. | 0:10:56 | 0:10:59 | |
I've got a nice little trick up my sleeve. | 0:10:59 | 0:11:01 | |
Licence to print money. 10-1 on a white Christmas. 10 quid on. | 0:11:05 | 0:11:11 | |
If it snows tomorrow, hello! I'm up 100 quid. | 0:11:11 | 0:11:15 | |
Have you considered this might be why you're struggling? | 0:11:15 | 0:11:18 | |
All these harebrained schemes. | 0:11:18 | 0:11:21 | |
-You call starting a car showroom a harebrained scheme, do you, Huw? -I didn't know you did that. | 0:11:21 | 0:11:25 | |
Mm-hm. Me and a couple of boys getting it started. | 0:11:25 | 0:11:29 | |
-Where are the cars going to come from? -That's the only obstacle at the minute, | 0:11:29 | 0:11:32 | |
but we're well on the way to getting a room. | 0:11:32 | 0:11:35 | |
You need more of a business plan, Gorwel. Under this Government... | 0:11:35 | 0:11:39 | |
Don't mention them in this house. | 0:11:39 | 0:11:41 | |
Under this government, people with business sense are being rewarded. | 0:11:41 | 0:11:45 | |
Good business is making money at last. | 0:11:45 | 0:11:48 | |
That's the Tories. | 0:11:48 | 0:11:49 | |
Good business is making money and everyone else can go to hell. | 0:11:49 | 0:11:53 | |
Not for long, mind. We are going to get those flaming Tories out. | 0:11:53 | 0:11:56 | |
Just you wait till the election. | 0:11:56 | 0:11:58 | |
I'll be down there, voting them out. | 0:11:58 | 0:12:01 | |
I'll be down there, standing up for the working man. | 0:12:01 | 0:12:04 | |
We'll show them that Joe Public is not to be trifled with! | 0:12:04 | 0:12:07 | |
We'll all stand together! | 0:12:07 | 0:12:10 | |
But, Gorwel, the election's already happened. | 0:12:13 | 0:12:16 | |
-Has it? -Yes, it was in June. | 0:12:19 | 0:12:22 | |
The Conservatives won by a landslide. | 0:12:22 | 0:12:24 | |
Oh. Hmm. | 0:12:24 | 0:12:27 | |
I was unconscious for a couple of days around then, Bren. | 0:12:27 | 0:12:30 | |
Must have passed me by, like. | 0:12:30 | 0:12:33 | |
Right! Well, you two better get yourselves up to bed. | 0:12:37 | 0:12:41 | |
Make sure you get a good night's sleep. | 0:12:41 | 0:12:43 | |
-Father Christmas only comes when you're sleeping. -Why? | 0:12:43 | 0:12:47 | |
I didn't make the rules, Owain. | 0:12:47 | 0:12:49 | |
I just abide by them. Good night. | 0:12:49 | 0:12:52 | |
Boys. | 0:12:53 | 0:12:54 | |
-Good night, boys. -Good night, boys. | 0:12:55 | 0:12:58 | |
'After we went to bed, Christmas Eve really got going.' | 0:12:59 | 0:13:03 | |
Time for a bit of Max, I think. | 0:13:03 | 0:13:06 | |
'We'd hear drinking and high spirits. | 0:13:06 | 0:13:09 | |
'And then the sound of Max Boyce. | 0:13:09 | 0:13:11 | |
'I could never really understand who Max Boyce was or why he shouted so much. | 0:13:11 | 0:13:16 | |
'I assumed he was a PE teacher.' | 0:13:16 | 0:13:18 | |
THEY SING IN WELSH | 0:13:19 | 0:13:22 | |
Madhouse! | 0:13:32 | 0:13:34 | |
'I never knew quite what to say to Maurice. And he never knew quite what to say to me. | 0:13:34 | 0:13:40 | |
'So we would mostly just look at each other. | 0:13:40 | 0:13:43 | |
'After four or five hours of this, it started to drag a bit.' | 0:13:43 | 0:13:47 | |
ALL: Oi! Oi! Oi! | 0:13:47 | 0:13:49 | |
Seems pretty quiet up there. | 0:13:50 | 0:13:53 | |
-Maybe they're getting a good night's sleep. -No-o, like! | 0:13:53 | 0:13:57 | |
Thick as thieves, those two. | 0:13:57 | 0:13:59 | |
If I know Maurice, he will be up to some mischief. | 0:13:59 | 0:14:02 | |
Do you think if you're blind, you still need to have your eyes shut for Father Christmas to come? | 0:14:07 | 0:14:14 | |
SNORING | 0:14:19 | 0:14:21 | |
Bummer. | 0:14:43 | 0:14:45 | |
'Because of Uncle Gorwel's faith that one day we'd have a white Christmas, | 0:14:48 | 0:14:52 | |
'he gave us sledges every year. I had a cupboard full.' | 0:14:52 | 0:14:56 | |
It would've been a better present, if it had snowed, like. | 0:14:56 | 0:14:59 | |
Thank you anyway, Uncle Gorwel. | 0:14:59 | 0:15:02 | |
Hm. I feel like I should give you something else really. | 0:15:02 | 0:15:06 | |
Oh, don't be silly! | 0:15:06 | 0:15:07 | |
If either of you want my shirt. | 0:15:07 | 0:15:10 | |
Oh, Gorwel, they will be fine with the sledges. | 0:15:10 | 0:15:14 | |
-I've got a ball here. -They'll be fine with the sledges. -Right you are. | 0:15:14 | 0:15:18 | |
And for the lovely Brenda... | 0:15:20 | 0:15:22 | |
'Years ago, Gorwel had made cheese on toast for my parents, | 0:15:22 | 0:15:25 | |
'and, to be polite, my mother pretended she loved cheese, even though she hated it. | 0:15:25 | 0:15:30 | |
'She was still paying for this mistake.' | 0:15:30 | 0:15:34 | |
-Cheeses of Asia. -Getting closer to the full set. | 0:15:34 | 0:15:38 | |
Fantastic! | 0:15:38 | 0:15:39 | |
Thanks, Dad! | 0:15:39 | 0:15:41 | |
Yes, and while we wait ten years for that to be set up, welcome to the future. | 0:15:41 | 0:15:46 | |
What on earth is that when it's at home? | 0:15:46 | 0:15:49 | |
This is the Sinclair Spectrum ZX. | 0:15:49 | 0:15:53 | |
-This is the greatest computer of all time. -What do you do with it? | 0:15:53 | 0:15:58 | |
You play games with it, that's what! This is the big thing now. Look! | 0:15:58 | 0:16:02 | |
He's been wanting one of these all year. | 0:16:02 | 0:16:04 | |
He's beside himself. | 0:16:04 | 0:16:06 | |
I've got a load of games to go with it. | 0:16:06 | 0:16:09 | |
There's Sublime Soccer. | 0:16:09 | 0:16:11 | |
Mind-blowing Golf Challenge 3, | 0:16:12 | 0:16:15 | |
Space Invaders, More Space Invaders, | 0:16:15 | 0:16:18 | |
Space Invaders Are Back, Space Invaders Return Once More... | 0:16:18 | 0:16:21 | |
Persistent, aren't they, the old Space Invaders? | 0:16:21 | 0:16:24 | |
Planning Permission. | 0:16:24 | 0:16:26 | |
"You get to play a civil servant. | 0:16:26 | 0:16:28 | |
You'll have to read applications, process paperwork and make decisions to shape the future of your town." | 0:16:28 | 0:16:34 | |
Let's get this up, shall we? | 0:16:34 | 0:16:37 | |
Hey, I was watching that! | 0:16:41 | 0:16:43 | |
-Sorry, what was it? -Brookside on Channel 4. | 0:16:43 | 0:16:45 | |
Ah, I heard that most people who watch Channel 4 are Marxist and homosexual. | 0:16:45 | 0:16:49 | |
What is it about this Brookside? | 0:16:49 | 0:16:51 | |
It's about a group of people living in Liverpool having all these problems. | 0:16:51 | 0:16:55 | |
You can see that any time. Let's get the old Spectrum set up then, eh? | 0:16:55 | 0:17:00 | |
Get ready to see the future. | 0:17:00 | 0:17:02 | |
HIGH-PITCHED SCREECHING | 0:17:04 | 0:17:07 | |
Does it always take this long? | 0:17:27 | 0:17:29 | |
No. There must be wrong with the speed of your television. | 0:17:29 | 0:17:33 | |
'Ere are! It's doing something now. | 0:17:41 | 0:17:43 | |
-HIGH-PITCHED SCREECHING -Good! Come on! | 0:17:43 | 0:17:47 | |
Right! | 0:17:48 | 0:17:50 | |
OK, it's obviously a faulty tape. | 0:17:50 | 0:17:52 | |
Let's try Ultimate Fishing. | 0:17:52 | 0:17:55 | |
HIGH-PITCHED SCREECHING | 0:17:56 | 0:17:59 | |
Right then, while we're waiting, shall we crack on with the game? | 0:18:08 | 0:18:12 | |
-Have we got two players? -Stay where you are, Morris. | 0:18:12 | 0:18:15 | |
Can't we just have a quick game, and then... | 0:18:17 | 0:18:20 | |
then we'll go straight back to the computer. | 0:18:20 | 0:18:23 | |
I will sue them for every penny. | 0:18:23 | 0:18:27 | |
They'll rue the day... | 0:18:27 | 0:18:29 | |
God help them if they ever come to me for a carpet! | 0:18:29 | 0:18:32 | |
Right, then, Subbuteo. How it's played is this, | 0:18:32 | 0:18:35 | |
you get eleven players each... | 0:18:35 | 0:18:38 | |
Mum! | 0:18:38 | 0:18:40 | |
You've got your five players each. | 0:18:40 | 0:18:41 | |
-Oh, Brenda! -Well, who put those down there? | 0:18:41 | 0:18:45 | |
Little men on the floor. | 0:18:45 | 0:18:47 | |
What are with the South Wales Toys and Collectibles Museum? Madhouse! | 0:18:47 | 0:18:52 | |
Psst! | 0:18:55 | 0:18:57 | |
I've still got that ball. | 0:18:57 | 0:19:00 | |
Hm! Nice to hear them having fun, isn't it? | 0:19:25 | 0:19:28 | |
Sometimes it's the simple things, eh? | 0:19:30 | 0:19:33 | |
MUSICAL BLEEPING | 0:19:37 | 0:19:39 | |
Oh, my God! The computers working! | 0:19:40 | 0:19:43 | |
Morris! | 0:19:43 | 0:19:45 | |
Morris! | 0:19:45 | 0:19:46 | |
Morris, come in here and play Planning Permission. | 0:19:46 | 0:19:49 | |
-I think they're happy with the ball, Huw. -All right, I'll play. | 0:19:49 | 0:19:53 | |
I'll play the flippin' thing! "Press X to be a local council official, or Y to start off as the secretary." | 0:19:53 | 0:20:00 | |
X. | 0:20:01 | 0:20:03 | |
# God rest you merry gentlemen | 0:20:20 | 0:20:22 | |
# Let nothing you dismay | 0:20:22 | 0:20:24 | |
# Remember Christ our saviour... # | 0:20:24 | 0:20:26 | |
Christmas 1986, and quite a lot had changed in our neighbourhood in the past few years. | 0:20:26 | 0:20:32 | |
The miners had gone on strike and stopped producing coal, the nation was thrown into chaos. | 0:20:32 | 0:20:37 | |
Dad had gone on strike too for a few days to show solidarity, | 0:20:37 | 0:20:40 | |
but as he was a traffic warden people were mostly pretty pleased. | 0:20:40 | 0:20:44 | |
Right, just turn it by 18 or 19 degrees. | 0:20:44 | 0:20:49 | |
-I said 18 or 19. That's nearly 30. -I don't understand why we waited till Christmas Eve to get the thing. | 0:20:49 | 0:20:56 | |
Yeah? It's not you that has to Hoover up its needles for 24 days. | 0:20:56 | 0:20:59 | |
Why not wait them till after Christmas? | 0:20:59 | 0:21:02 | |
You want people to think we like walking around up to our ankles in forest? What are we, bears? | 0:21:02 | 0:21:07 | |
Might as well be talking to myself, here. | 0:21:07 | 0:21:11 | |
Right, I've put bleach in the toilet so try and hold it in, please. | 0:21:11 | 0:21:16 | |
And no going in the fridge. | 0:21:16 | 0:21:18 | |
What, no peeing in the fridge? | 0:21:18 | 0:21:20 | |
What were you watching? | 0:21:24 | 0:21:26 | |
The Snowman. | 0:21:26 | 0:21:28 | |
What happened? | 0:21:28 | 0:21:29 | |
Kid builds a snowman, they fly about, it melts. | 0:21:29 | 0:21:32 | |
Any good? | 0:21:32 | 0:21:34 | |
Didn't think much of it, to be honest. Far-fetched. | 0:21:34 | 0:21:38 | |
Here come the Cadwallader boys. | 0:21:42 | 0:21:44 | |
Looks like they've been recruiting. | 0:21:48 | 0:21:50 | |
# God rest you merry gentlemen | 0:21:50 | 0:21:54 | |
# Let nothing you dismay... # | 0:21:54 | 0:21:55 | |
If they upset your Nativity, Owen, I'll castrate them. | 0:21:55 | 0:21:58 | |
I'll go out and make sure they only sing the one song this year. | 0:22:00 | 0:22:03 | |
We're not made of money. | 0:22:03 | 0:22:05 | |
-Plus 45p VAT. -VAT? | 0:22:07 | 0:22:11 | |
-We're trading as a limited company these days. It's more tax-efficient. -Don't I pay enough rates as it is? | 0:22:11 | 0:22:16 | |
Merry Christmas! See you next year. We'll confirm in November. | 0:22:16 | 0:22:20 | |
We're widening our catchment area so it could be any time from the 23rd onwards. | 0:22:20 | 0:22:24 | |
Merry Christmas. | 0:22:24 | 0:22:25 | |
Right, boys, Gregory Street. Once In Royal David's City. Let's go! Let's go! | 0:22:25 | 0:22:29 | |
'As always, Uncle Huw and Maurice had brought the next big thing with them. | 0:22:29 | 0:22:33 | |
'The year before they'd given me a truck that turned into a robot. | 0:22:33 | 0:22:37 | |
'Didn't think much of it. Impractical.' | 0:22:37 | 0:22:39 | |
I did try to get hold of you to see if you wanted anything, but obviously you still don't have a telephone. | 0:22:39 | 0:22:44 | |
Geraint still doesn't see the point. | 0:22:44 | 0:22:47 | |
Phone box up the hill still works perfectly well, thank you very much. | 0:22:47 | 0:22:51 | |
What about that time those lads jammed an Opal Fruit in the coin slot? | 0:22:51 | 0:22:54 | |
We couldn't call anyone for a month! | 0:22:54 | 0:22:57 | |
-No-one died. -My Auntie Rita did! We missed the funeral! | 0:22:57 | 0:23:00 | |
All right, one person died. | 0:23:00 | 0:23:02 | |
You really should get one fitted, Geraint. | 0:23:02 | 0:23:05 | |
Huw, you call someone, they charge you for it. | 0:23:05 | 0:23:08 | |
You call someone else and they charge you for that. Never ends. | 0:23:08 | 0:23:11 | |
You're behind the times, Geraint. We live in a capitalist society now. | 0:23:11 | 0:23:15 | |
You wait till Kinnock gets in. | 0:23:15 | 0:23:17 | |
Conservatives'll be back. | 0:23:17 | 0:23:19 | |
Over my dead body. | 0:23:19 | 0:23:21 | |
I don't know one person in this town who votes Tory. | 0:23:21 | 0:23:24 | |
They reckon under the Tories we've all got a lot more income than before. | 0:23:24 | 0:23:27 | |
-We can afford more luxury goods. -Oh, I love a luxury good. | 0:23:27 | 0:23:31 | |
Nonsense, "luxury goods". | 0:23:31 | 0:23:33 | |
Machine that washes dishes, computers, phone line in every house. What is this, Dallas? | 0:23:33 | 0:23:38 | |
I don't care who it is, Labour or the flaming Tories! They're all the bloody same, these politicians! | 0:23:38 | 0:23:43 | |
Whether it's Thatcher or the ginge, I'll still be sleeping in a beach hut, living off Coco Pops! | 0:23:43 | 0:23:48 | |
No-one cares for the working man! | 0:23:48 | 0:23:51 | |
Yes, but you're not a working man, though, are you, Gorwel. You haven't got a job. | 0:23:51 | 0:23:55 | |
No, I suppose not. | 0:23:55 | 0:23:58 | |
No. Who's having a whisky, then? | 0:23:58 | 0:24:02 | |
You are, I imagine. | 0:24:02 | 0:24:06 | |
Anyway, another good year. | 0:24:06 | 0:24:09 | |
The highlight, of course, was thoroughly shafting his mother in the courtrooms. | 0:24:09 | 0:24:13 | |
Normally it's the mum that gets the upper hand in court, but not this time. Bang! | 0:24:13 | 0:24:19 | |
I get custody! | 0:24:19 | 0:24:21 | |
Bang! She's gets rented accommodation, eh, kiddo? Eh? | 0:24:21 | 0:24:24 | |
She hasn't got her own bathroom any more, has she, eh? Eh? | 0:24:24 | 0:24:28 | |
You're a bit quiet, there, Maurice. | 0:24:28 | 0:24:30 | |
All right, son? | 0:24:30 | 0:24:33 | |
Course he's all right. | 0:24:35 | 0:24:37 | |
-He's doing excellently at school. -So's Owen. | 0:24:37 | 0:24:40 | |
Maurice captained the Meccano team. | 0:24:40 | 0:24:43 | |
Owen got to the quarter-finals of Plasticine '86, didn't you, pal? | 0:24:43 | 0:24:48 | |
Maurice's teacher says that he's not showing any ill-effects at all from being in a one-parent family. | 0:24:48 | 0:24:53 | |
Didn't she, Maurice? Maurice! | 0:24:53 | 0:24:57 | |
'Maurice was as quiet as usual. | 0:25:00 | 0:25:03 | |
'But he'd started to seem a bit more threatening. | 0:25:03 | 0:25:06 | |
'I decided it might be an idea to stay on his good side.' | 0:25:06 | 0:25:09 | |
Going through one of those phases. You know, | 0:25:09 | 0:25:11 | |
that's what they're like. They er... First of all they idolise you, then they react against you. | 0:25:11 | 0:25:16 | |
When exactly did he idolise you, Huw? | 0:25:16 | 0:25:19 | |
Until he started listening to that... | 0:25:19 | 0:25:22 | |
homosexual music. | 0:25:22 | 0:25:24 | |
He loves his art and his woodwork, that boy. | 0:25:24 | 0:25:27 | |
-That Nativity scene's his pride and joy. Obsessed with it, isn't he? -Yes. | 0:25:27 | 0:25:32 | |
Why'd you make that? | 0:25:32 | 0:25:33 | |
Got me out of playing rugby. | 0:25:33 | 0:25:36 | |
-Still believe in Father Christmas? -Dunno. Do you? | 0:25:41 | 0:25:44 | |
I dunno. | 0:25:44 | 0:25:46 | |
My father said he doesn't come round our house. | 0:25:46 | 0:25:48 | |
He said, "I'm not letting some git with a white beard get all the credit. | 0:25:48 | 0:25:53 | |
"I sold a lot of rugs to get you that train set". | 0:25:53 | 0:25:56 | |
Trouble with art, though - | 0:25:58 | 0:25:59 | |
-there's no money in it. -Oh, there's money in it if you steal it. | 0:25:59 | 0:26:03 | |
Me and some of the boys looked into nicking the Mona Lisa. | 0:26:03 | 0:26:06 | |
Down Paris, like. Swines have got it behind a screen now. | 0:26:06 | 0:26:10 | |
Spoil sports. | 0:26:10 | 0:26:13 | |
Anyway... I bet you're wondering what's in that box. | 0:26:13 | 0:26:17 | |
Well, this year, I decided to get you a little Christmas Eve present. | 0:26:17 | 0:26:21 | |
This is an artificial tree. | 0:26:25 | 0:26:28 | |
-What's the point of that? -No more pine needles on the floor, Ben, messing it up, the carpets. | 0:26:28 | 0:26:32 | |
Oh, d'you know, I've been on at Geraint to do something about the pine needle problem for years. | 0:26:32 | 0:26:37 | |
-Well, eventually, they reckon these will replace real trees in forests. -Oh, really?! | 0:26:37 | 0:26:42 | |
And no smell. | 0:26:46 | 0:26:48 | |
Beautiful. | 0:26:48 | 0:26:50 | |
Right. Just turn it 30 to 35 degrees anti-clockwise. No, anti-clockwise. | 0:26:55 | 0:27:01 | |
I don't understand why we can't just have both trees. | 0:27:01 | 0:27:04 | |
You want people to think that we're so greedy we have two trees? What are we, an arboretum? | 0:27:04 | 0:27:09 | |
This is going to be my year, this. I can feel it. | 0:27:14 | 0:27:17 | |
100 quid on a white Christmas. | 0:27:17 | 0:27:19 | |
One flake of snow falls tomorrow, they'll owe. A grand, like. | 0:27:19 | 0:27:26 | |
-Where did you get £100? -I got one of those business loans off the social. | 0:27:26 | 0:27:30 | |
I told them I wanted a hundred quid to start a DIY company. | 0:27:30 | 0:27:33 | |
So, you defrauded the social services. | 0:27:33 | 0:27:36 | |
Well, it was half-true, like. | 0:27:36 | 0:27:39 | |
I did want a hundred quid. | 0:27:39 | 0:27:41 | |
Anyway, snow comes down overnight, I've got the equipment to deal with it. | 0:27:44 | 0:27:48 | |
Who's having a whisky? | 0:27:52 | 0:27:54 | |
-You are, I imagine. -What's castrate mean? | 0:27:54 | 0:27:57 | |
Sorry, Owen? | 0:27:57 | 0:27:58 | |
You said you'd castrate whoever knocked over my Nativity. | 0:27:58 | 0:28:03 | |
-What's castrate mean? -Well, it's erm... | 0:28:03 | 0:28:05 | |
Well, it's erm... | 0:28:05 | 0:28:07 | |
It's er... | 0:28:07 | 0:28:10 | |
-Like a haircut. -Yeah, it's er...your hair... | 0:28:10 | 0:28:14 | |
Except with your knackers. | 0:28:14 | 0:28:17 | |
THEY SING IN WELSH | 0:28:23 | 0:28:25 | |
-Oi! Oi! -Hey, we've not heard a peep out of them all night. | 0:28:52 | 0:28:56 | |
I bet you they're up there plotting something now. | 0:28:56 | 0:28:59 | |
# Hang the DJ | 0:29:06 | 0:29:09 | |
# Hang the DJ | 0:29:09 | 0:29:11 | |
# Hang the DJ... # | 0:29:11 | 0:29:14 | |
It's stupid, Christmas. We're all just going to die in the end anyway. | 0:29:20 | 0:29:24 | |
'Maurice had started talking quite a bit about death. | 0:29:24 | 0:29:28 | |
'On a whole, I think I preferred it when he didn't say anything.' | 0:29:28 | 0:29:31 | |
THEY SNORE | 0:29:35 | 0:29:36 | |
Bum. | 0:30:00 | 0:30:02 | |
THEY ALL CHATTER | 0:30:08 | 0:30:10 | |
Ready? One, two, three! | 0:30:15 | 0:30:17 | |
Oh, yes! That's four times in five years. | 0:30:18 | 0:30:22 | |
Could have made a few quid out of that stuff. | 0:30:22 | 0:30:24 | |
Never mind. Roll on next year, I will have you. | 0:30:24 | 0:30:28 | |
Well, who wants some more potatoes? | 0:30:28 | 0:30:31 | |
Aw, no, thanks. | 0:30:31 | 0:30:33 | |
-I've got 67 left. -Ah, Brenda, please. | 0:30:33 | 0:30:36 | |
I'll take a doggy bag off you. | 0:30:36 | 0:30:38 | |
Last time it saw me through till February. | 0:30:38 | 0:30:41 | |
We'll keep the Christmas pudding until after the Queen's Speech. | 0:30:41 | 0:30:45 | |
-Good idea. -Have you got a colour TV yet? | 0:30:45 | 0:30:48 | |
No, Geraint still isn't convinced. | 0:30:48 | 0:30:51 | |
Ours has got 2 million colours. | 0:30:51 | 0:30:54 | |
-Which ones? -Red, yellow, all the greats. | 0:30:54 | 0:30:57 | |
-Two is enough for me. -Brings things to life. | 0:30:57 | 0:31:00 | |
Did you know Lenny Henry is a black fella? | 0:31:00 | 0:31:03 | |
-I tell you what programme I like, the EastEnders. -What's that about? | 0:31:03 | 0:31:06 | |
People living in London having all these problems. | 0:31:06 | 0:31:09 | |
-Oh, I'll look out for that. -You haven't got a television. | 0:31:09 | 0:31:13 | |
I've got a trick up my sleeve. | 0:31:13 | 0:31:15 | |
What I do, I go down the TV shop and watch it through the window. | 0:31:15 | 0:31:20 | |
-You get to see it 20 times that way! -But you can't hear what they say. | 0:31:20 | 0:31:24 | |
Oh, I get the gist of it. | 0:31:24 | 0:31:26 | |
I saw most of the World Cup and Last Night Of The Proms. | 0:31:26 | 0:31:30 | |
You can hardly watch The Proms without hearing the sound. | 0:31:30 | 0:31:33 | |
Actually, I never enjoyed it so much! | 0:31:33 | 0:31:36 | |
Listen up, this is simple. | 0:31:41 | 0:31:44 | |
If you get more than half the balls, you've won. | 0:31:44 | 0:31:47 | |
Our side of the family is all about winning. | 0:31:47 | 0:31:50 | |
This year, I carpeted Shirley Bassey's bathroom whilst your mother is now a dinner lady. | 0:31:50 | 0:31:54 | |
We're winners. | 0:31:54 | 0:31:57 | |
Right, fingers on hippos. | 0:31:57 | 0:31:59 | |
Ready? Go! | 0:31:59 | 0:32:01 | |
Keep hitting the lever. Keep hitting the lever. Keep hitting the lever. Keep hitting the lever. | 0:32:01 | 0:32:07 | |
Mad house, this is. | 0:32:07 | 0:32:10 | |
Keep hitting the lever! | 0:32:10 | 0:32:13 | |
-Stop! Stop! -Let's count 'em up. | 0:32:13 | 0:32:19 | |
Let's hope there was enough. | 0:32:19 | 0:32:21 | |
-It was good. -Owen's hippo has 10 balls. | 0:32:21 | 0:32:24 | |
Rhys's hippo has nine balls. | 0:32:26 | 0:32:28 | |
Well done, Owen. | 0:32:28 | 0:32:30 | |
Well, it's not about winning, is it? | 0:32:30 | 0:32:31 | |
-There's meant to be 20 balls. -Cracking game that, lads. | 0:32:31 | 0:32:35 | |
Who wants to play find my socks? | 0:32:35 | 0:32:37 | |
There's mean to be 20 balls. There's obviously one ball missing. | 0:32:37 | 0:32:40 | |
Now, who wants a bit of Christmas pudding? | 0:32:40 | 0:32:43 | |
Never mind Christmas pudding! | 0:32:43 | 0:32:45 | |
-Where's the 20th ball? It invalidates the result of the game. -Never mind. | 0:32:45 | 0:32:50 | |
-Where is the other ball? -Leave it! | 0:32:50 | 0:32:52 | |
There's meant to be 20 balls. | 0:32:52 | 0:32:54 | |
If there's only 19 it turns Hungry Hippos into a complete farce! | 0:32:54 | 0:32:57 | |
-We can call it a draw. -We could, could we? | 0:32:57 | 0:33:00 | |
A safe little draw. A nice safe little draw and put our petticoats... | 0:33:00 | 0:33:06 | |
-I'll give him petticoats. -No, sorry, we're going to have a rematch. | 0:33:06 | 0:33:11 | |
-I don't think we should. -I bet you don't. | 0:33:11 | 0:33:13 | |
You would rather say it was a safe draw and play with My Little Ponies. | 0:33:13 | 0:33:17 | |
Actually, Huw, | 0:33:17 | 0:33:20 | |
Owen won. | 0:33:20 | 0:33:21 | |
He is offering you a draw out of charity. | 0:33:21 | 0:33:27 | |
Charity? | 0:33:27 | 0:33:30 | |
Well, I tell you what, | 0:33:30 | 0:33:32 | |
at least I don't get my clothes from a charity shop. | 0:33:32 | 0:33:35 | |
Oh, do something, Geraint. | 0:33:35 | 0:33:36 | |
-It's just a bit of fun. -I might not have a lot of money, right, | 0:33:36 | 0:33:40 | |
but what I do do have I didn't get by screwing up my | 0:33:40 | 0:33:44 | |
marriage and then screwing over my wife in court. No offence, Maurice! | 0:33:44 | 0:33:49 | |
At least I earn my money by providing carpets, | 0:33:49 | 0:33:54 | |
rather than getting sacked from a meat processing plant for stealing sheep and selling them second hand. | 0:33:54 | 0:33:59 | |
One! I stole one sheep. | 0:33:59 | 0:34:02 | |
At least I've got a nice big house, big enough for a television and a toilet. | 0:34:02 | 0:34:06 | |
At least I learned how to use a toilet rather than wetting the bed until I was 15! | 0:34:06 | 0:34:11 | |
13! | 0:34:11 | 0:34:13 | |
-I was 13. -Oh, yes, this is just a bit of fun. | 0:34:13 | 0:34:17 | |
Right! You and I are going to settle this once and for all. | 0:34:17 | 0:34:21 | |
Let's have it! | 0:34:21 | 0:34:23 | |
-Take a hippo. -I don't think... -Shut it! | 0:34:27 | 0:34:29 | |
I said... | 0:34:32 | 0:34:34 | |
take a hippo. | 0:34:34 | 0:34:36 | |
On three. | 0:34:45 | 0:34:47 | |
-One, two... -Ha, ha, ha! | 0:34:56 | 0:34:59 | |
The pudding! | 0:35:04 | 0:35:06 | |
Fire! That's a fire! | 0:35:06 | 0:35:09 | |
-Don't just stand there! -Wrap yourselves in a carpet. | 0:35:09 | 0:35:12 | |
I set a mate of mine on fire once and they wrapped him in a carpet. | 0:35:12 | 0:35:16 | |
-We're not on fire. -We will be in a minute. | 0:35:16 | 0:35:18 | |
Stand back! | 0:35:18 | 0:35:19 | |
A glass of water is no good, Geraint! Stay where you are! | 0:35:22 | 0:35:29 | |
-Call 999! -Has anyone got 10p for the phone? | 0:35:29 | 0:35:32 | |
-The bloody tree! We're done for! We're going to die! -Can anyone change a pound note? -We're all dead men! | 0:35:32 | 0:35:37 | |
-I need change. -We are dead! | 0:35:37 | 0:35:39 | |
-Where's Mum gone? -I love you, Maurice, my dead son! -Stand back! | 0:35:39 | 0:35:45 | |
-Bren, you saved our life. -Good work, Bren. | 0:35:58 | 0:36:00 | |
Aargh! | 0:36:00 | 0:36:02 | |
The fire was already out, Gorwel. | 0:36:14 | 0:36:17 | |
Better safe than sorry, Bren. | 0:36:18 | 0:36:21 | |
Not now, Geraint. | 0:36:25 | 0:36:27 | |
Trivial Pursuit? | 0:36:30 | 0:36:33 | |
Easy, careful you don't knock it. | 0:36:33 | 0:36:35 | |
OK. | 0:36:35 | 0:36:37 | |
Just six degrees more. | 0:36:40 | 0:36:42 | |
Six, mind. Don't go mad. | 0:36:42 | 0:36:44 | |
# Hark, the herald angels sing | 0:36:48 | 0:36:52 | |
# Glory to... # | 0:36:52 | 0:36:55 | |
'Christmas 1989, the '80s were coming to an end, a terrible recession was around the corner. | 0:36:55 | 0:37:01 | |
'It was a time of revolution, the Berlin Wall had just come down - | 0:37:01 | 0:37:04 | |
'it inspired many people to dream of change. | 0:37:04 | 0:37:08 | |
'It inspired Dad to take down the fence in the garden. | 0:37:08 | 0:37:10 | |
'We had got a video player and even a telephone.' | 0:37:10 | 0:37:14 | |
At the third stroke it will be 3.13 precisely. | 0:37:14 | 0:37:19 | |
'But we were only allowed to use it for emergencies. | 0:37:21 | 0:37:24 | |
'And we had to make sure all emergencies happened after 6pm.' | 0:37:24 | 0:37:28 | |
Who's been using this phone? | 0:37:28 | 0:37:31 | |
Essential calls only, please. | 0:37:31 | 0:37:34 | |
I might as well be talking to myself, here. | 0:37:34 | 0:37:38 | |
'Mum was still cleaning like a maniac or, she called it, maintaining standards. | 0:37:51 | 0:37:55 | |
'It's funny what you think is normal when you are young. | 0:37:55 | 0:37:58 | |
'It wasn't till my first week at university that I realised | 0:37:58 | 0:38:01 | |
'I was the only person who brought his own tea-towels.' | 0:38:01 | 0:38:03 | |
-What you watching? -Ben Hur. | 0:38:36 | 0:38:40 | |
-What happened? -Ben Hur was a Jewish prince, sold into slavery, endured many hardships | 0:38:40 | 0:38:47 | |
and great suffering before returning to take revenge in one of the most expensive closing scenes ever made. | 0:38:47 | 0:38:54 | |
All in Technicolor. | 0:38:54 | 0:38:57 | |
-Any good? -Didn't think much of it, to be honest. | 0:38:57 | 0:38:59 | |
No, we didn't think much of it. | 0:38:59 | 0:39:02 | |
Long. | 0:39:02 | 0:39:03 | |
One day it'll be me sitting around with my feet up watching people being sold into slavery. | 0:39:03 | 0:39:08 | |
DOORBELL RINGS | 0:39:08 | 0:39:10 | |
Well, I never. | 0:39:12 | 0:39:15 | |
The cheek of it. | 0:39:15 | 0:39:17 | |
Your brothers are five minutes early. | 0:39:17 | 0:39:20 | |
What do they think we are, a drive-in cinema? Come on, you two. Chop-chop. Look lively. | 0:39:20 | 0:39:26 | |
What was really moving about spending time with Tom Jones, | 0:39:30 | 0:39:33 | |
a man who's had the hits he's had and the underwear thrown at him, is that underneath it all, he is just a man. | 0:39:33 | 0:39:40 | |
A man with a pair of trousers on. Like you or me. | 0:39:40 | 0:39:43 | |
Does something smell funny in here? | 0:39:43 | 0:39:46 | |
At one point we were on the veranda and he turned to me, Tom Jones, and you know what he said? | 0:39:46 | 0:39:50 | |
"Pass us those biscuits." | 0:39:50 | 0:39:53 | |
That's right. Eats biscuits. | 0:39:53 | 0:39:54 | |
Just like you or I eat biscuits. | 0:39:54 | 0:39:56 | |
Can someone smell something sort of...? | 0:39:56 | 0:39:58 | |
And that's what you notice about really great men. | 0:39:58 | 0:40:01 | |
Humility. At one point we were in his swimming pool, | 0:40:01 | 0:40:04 | |
I was on his lilo - shaped like a crocodile - | 0:40:04 | 0:40:06 | |
just like a normal person's lilo. He turned to me, Tom Jones... | 0:40:06 | 0:40:10 | |
I'm sorry to interrupt you but I think something smells funny under this tree. | 0:40:10 | 0:40:14 | |
-SHE SNIFFS -Oh! | 0:40:14 | 0:40:17 | |
-That's my gift to you, that is, Bren. -Oh! | 0:40:17 | 0:40:21 | |
It might be edible. | 0:40:21 | 0:40:23 | |
I look forward to tomorrow. | 0:40:24 | 0:40:26 | |
It might be the biggest Stilton in Wales, like. | 0:40:26 | 0:40:29 | |
Gosh! | 0:40:30 | 0:40:32 | |
Anyway, I suppose the point I'm trying to make about Tom Jones, | 0:40:32 | 0:40:36 | |
if I am trying to make a point at all, is above all... | 0:40:36 | 0:40:39 | |
I won a competition back in the 70s to spend a day with Jimmy Saville. | 0:40:39 | 0:40:44 | |
He hardly compares to Tom Jones, does he? | 0:40:44 | 0:40:46 | |
-No. -Good. Right, well... | 0:40:46 | 0:40:49 | |
He was running a marathon the week after so we didn't get up to much. | 0:40:49 | 0:40:53 | |
A bit of circuit training, press-ups. | 0:40:53 | 0:40:56 | |
I don't think that was worth interrupting me for, do you? | 0:40:56 | 0:41:00 | |
Oh gosh, Maurice, you are getting tall. | 0:41:02 | 0:41:04 | |
Yes, he's had a terrific year of growing. Very impressive year. | 0:41:04 | 0:41:08 | |
Obviously eating all his greens. | 0:41:08 | 0:41:10 | |
No, not just greens - all sorts. I've had a lady in to cook. | 0:41:10 | 0:41:15 | |
Housekeeper? | 0:41:15 | 0:41:16 | |
Girlfriend. | 0:41:19 | 0:41:20 | |
Maurice, put the tape on. | 0:41:23 | 0:41:24 | |
Come on, you big lump. | 0:41:27 | 0:41:29 | |
Where did you meet her? | 0:41:31 | 0:41:32 | |
Ah, put one or two... | 0:41:32 | 0:41:36 | |
You know, one or two personal ads in the... | 0:41:36 | 0:41:38 | |
Been advertising in the lonely hearts, have you, Huw? | 0:41:38 | 0:41:41 | |
-They're called personal ads these days. -Oh, aye. | 0:41:41 | 0:41:45 | |
What did you put about yourself, Huw? | 0:41:45 | 0:41:47 | |
Very rich, highly sexual man, as heard on radio advert. | 0:41:47 | 0:41:50 | |
Has a large workforce, hires and fires at the drop of a hat. | 0:41:50 | 0:41:54 | |
Knows Tom James and has been on Jones's lilo. | 0:41:54 | 0:41:56 | |
Would like to meet a woman with a high sense of hygiene. | 0:41:56 | 0:41:58 | |
Shush! It's starting. | 0:41:58 | 0:42:02 | |
I'll tell you later on. | 0:42:02 | 0:42:04 | |
Oggy, Oggy, Oggy! | 0:42:07 | 0:42:09 | |
Oy, Oy, Oy! | 0:42:09 | 0:42:10 | |
Oy, Oy, Oy! | 0:42:10 | 0:42:11 | |
Shush, Maurice. | 0:42:11 | 0:42:14 | |
He's going through one of those phases, you know. | 0:42:17 | 0:42:21 | |
Listening to all this American music and having thoughts. | 0:42:21 | 0:42:24 | |
THEY SING ALONG | 0:42:27 | 0:42:33 | |
It didn't work out too well. | 0:42:54 | 0:42:57 | |
Sorry. | 0:42:59 | 0:43:01 | |
'Looking back, I wonder if I'm exaggerating | 0:43:14 | 0:43:17 | |
'some of the things mum did around the house. | 0:43:17 | 0:43:19 | |
'Either that, or by this time she was starting to get a bit... | 0:43:19 | 0:43:22 | |
'well... | 0:43:22 | 0:43:24 | |
'odd.' | 0:43:24 | 0:43:25 | |
Number 30, the Preeces. | 0:43:50 | 0:43:52 | |
OK, We Wish You A Merry Christmas. | 0:43:53 | 0:43:56 | |
Remember to smile. | 0:43:56 | 0:43:57 | |
One, two, three, four... | 0:43:57 | 0:43:59 | |
# We Wish You A Merry Christmas | 0:43:59 | 0:44:02 | |
# We Wish You A Merry Christmas | 0:44:02 | 0:44:03 | |
# We Wish You a Merry Christmas... # | 0:44:03 | 0:44:06 | |
Blimey, they're here. Where's the cheque book? | 0:44:06 | 0:44:11 | |
I tidied it. | 0:44:11 | 0:44:13 | |
Where is the blasted thing? | 0:44:15 | 0:44:17 | |
I tidied it away. | 0:44:17 | 0:44:19 | |
I'm sure things in this house just | 0:44:19 | 0:44:23 | |
sprout legs and walk away. | 0:44:23 | 0:44:26 | |
I might as well be talking to myself here. | 0:44:26 | 0:44:29 | |
And I wish you'd stop wishing us a merry Christmas. Oh! | 0:44:29 | 0:44:33 | |
Ah, got it! | 0:44:35 | 0:44:36 | |
What's that flaming racket? | 0:44:36 | 0:44:38 | |
They come every year. You're normally too late to see them. | 0:44:38 | 0:44:42 | |
Get rid of them, will you? We're missing Max, here. | 0:44:42 | 0:44:45 | |
-You can pause it. -It wears the tape out. | 0:44:45 | 0:44:48 | |
Just stop it and start again. | 0:44:48 | 0:44:50 | |
It wears the tape out. | 0:44:50 | 0:44:52 | |
-Well, can we just watch it another... -For God's sake, man, think of the tape. | 0:44:52 | 0:44:56 | |
# We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy New Year. # | 0:45:02 | 0:45:08 | |
Very nice. Merry Christmas. | 0:45:08 | 0:45:10 | |
Now, we're going to do some new stuff. This is Mull of Kintyre. | 0:45:10 | 0:45:14 | |
Whoa, whoa, whoa! | 0:45:14 | 0:45:16 | |
That's not a Christmas song. | 0:45:16 | 0:45:18 | |
We found the whole Christmas thing a bit limiting. | 0:45:18 | 0:45:20 | |
We see ourselves more as a group who outgrew the Christmas market. | 0:45:20 | 0:45:24 | |
This is our debut compact disc. It's not out till next year, | 0:45:24 | 0:45:28 | |
but if you buy it off us now it's 50p cheaper. | 0:45:28 | 0:45:31 | |
We're trying to watch a video in there. Can I just...? | 0:45:31 | 0:45:33 | |
Well, if you're not interested in the new stuff, | 0:45:33 | 0:45:35 | |
will leave you with one of our classics - The Holly And The Ivy. | 0:45:35 | 0:45:39 | |
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Stop! | 0:45:39 | 0:45:40 | |
# The holly and the ivy | 0:45:40 | 0:45:43 | |
# When they are both full grown | 0:45:43 | 0:45:45 | |
# Of all the trees that are in the wood | 0:45:45 | 0:45:48 | |
# The holly bears the crown... # | 0:45:48 | 0:45:50 | |
What's he doing out there? We're missing Max here. | 0:45:50 | 0:45:53 | |
I'm going to shut them up myself in a minute! | 0:45:56 | 0:45:59 | |
-Yeah, yeah, you're all talk, you are. -What's that, Huw? | 0:45:59 | 0:46:02 | |
You, you're all talk. You're not going to do anything. | 0:46:02 | 0:46:05 | |
Here we go, | 0:46:05 | 0:46:08 | |
the traditional conversation, right. | 0:46:08 | 0:46:10 | |
Gorwel never achieves anything. | 0:46:10 | 0:46:14 | |
Gorwel had to sell some of his clothes this year. | 0:46:14 | 0:46:16 | |
Leave him alone. Never mind. | 0:46:16 | 0:46:18 | |
You're right, Huw. I am all talk. | 0:46:18 | 0:46:21 | |
I'm just an idiot who spends all his money buying novelty cheeses for his sister-in-law. | 0:46:21 | 0:46:27 | |
I never do anything useful. | 0:46:27 | 0:46:30 | |
I never do anything. | 0:46:32 | 0:46:33 | |
Anything except this. | 0:46:39 | 0:46:40 | |
Gorwel! | 0:46:42 | 0:46:43 | |
WHISTLE BLOWS | 0:46:45 | 0:46:47 | |
That's enough, thank you. | 0:46:47 | 0:46:49 | |
-Bye-bye. -Hey, what are you doing? | 0:46:49 | 0:46:51 | |
Someone's got to stop 'em. Why can't it be Gorwel? | 0:46:51 | 0:46:54 | |
Where did you get that whistle from? | 0:46:54 | 0:46:56 | |
I carry it for situations like this. | 0:46:56 | 0:46:59 | |
Do you realise that disturbing the peace is a crime? | 0:47:00 | 0:47:04 | |
Do you realise that singing badly is a crime, too? | 0:47:04 | 0:47:07 | |
-Do you know who you're talking to? -Yes. | 0:47:07 | 0:47:11 | |
I'm talking to you, | 0:47:11 | 0:47:13 | |
and quite frankly I've had just about enough of your racket. | 0:47:13 | 0:47:17 | |
I'm trying to watch Max Boyce! | 0:47:17 | 0:47:19 | |
Who the hell wants to watch Max Boyce? | 0:47:19 | 0:47:21 | |
I'll give you one chance to take that back, boy. | 0:47:23 | 0:47:26 | |
Is he even still alive? | 0:47:26 | 0:47:28 | |
You don't say that about Max. | 0:47:28 | 0:47:31 | |
You don't do that. | 0:47:31 | 0:47:33 | |
SHOUTING AND SCUFFLING | 0:47:35 | 0:47:37 | |
Watch the nativity! | 0:47:37 | 0:47:39 | |
SHOUTING | 0:47:39 | 0:47:41 | |
-Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! -Hold me back! Hold me back! | 0:47:43 | 0:47:47 | |
Oh, my giddy aunt! | 0:47:55 | 0:47:58 | |
Can I go out? | 0:47:58 | 0:48:00 | |
No. Watch Max Boyce, please. | 0:48:00 | 0:48:01 | |
I don't understand the jokes. | 0:48:01 | 0:48:03 | |
I have never understood the jokes, | 0:48:03 | 0:48:05 | |
but you don't hear me complaining, do you? | 0:48:05 | 0:48:07 | |
It's all about the old days. | 0:48:07 | 0:48:10 | |
The 1970s is not the old days, is it, Huw? | 0:48:10 | 0:48:13 | |
No. | 0:48:13 | 0:48:14 | |
Wales has gone soft. It's gone soft, I tell you. | 0:48:20 | 0:48:23 | |
You can't punch anyone. You can't kick a man's tambourine. | 0:48:23 | 0:48:27 | |
How much did you have to pay? | 0:48:27 | 0:48:28 | |
Because it was Christmas they let me off with 50 quid bail, like. | 0:48:28 | 0:48:33 | |
Plus another 50 for four taxis to the hospital. | 0:48:33 | 0:48:36 | |
And 20 quid to the tambourine bloke... | 0:48:38 | 0:48:40 | |
..for his tambourine. | 0:48:41 | 0:48:42 | |
And where are you going to find that sort of money? | 0:48:42 | 0:48:45 | |
I got a little trick up my sleeve. | 0:48:45 | 0:48:48 | |
A little trick called not paying it. | 0:48:48 | 0:48:51 | |
-They'll catch up with you. -I'll be all right. | 0:48:51 | 0:48:55 | |
The boys down the aquarium will have me back, I'm sure of it. | 0:48:55 | 0:48:59 | |
I can lend you the money, Gorwel. | 0:49:00 | 0:49:02 | |
I can't take your money, Huw. | 0:49:07 | 0:49:08 | |
Oh. | 0:49:08 | 0:49:11 | |
OK. | 0:49:11 | 0:49:12 | |
Well, thinking about it, I, er... I might be able to take it. | 0:49:15 | 0:49:19 | |
Right, well... | 0:49:19 | 0:49:21 | |
Offer's there. | 0:49:22 | 0:49:24 | |
The more I consider it, the more I feel I could definitely take the money. | 0:49:24 | 0:49:28 | |
Good. | 0:49:30 | 0:49:32 | |
Right. | 0:49:52 | 0:49:53 | |
Who's having a whisky? | 0:49:55 | 0:49:57 | |
I don't think you should have any more, Gorwel. | 0:49:57 | 0:50:01 | |
I don't think so either, but here we go. | 0:50:01 | 0:50:05 | |
'I couldn't work out how Maurice had got so big that he hardly fitted in the room. | 0:50:07 | 0:50:12 | |
'Or how his hair had got like that. | 0:50:12 | 0:50:14 | |
'I wondered if a similar thing might happen to me. | 0:50:14 | 0:50:17 | |
'Still, we got along as well as usual.' | 0:50:17 | 0:50:21 | |
SNORING | 0:50:26 | 0:50:29 | |
Snow! | 0:50:48 | 0:50:51 | |
Snow! | 0:50:51 | 0:50:53 | |
GORWELL YELLS | 0:50:53 | 0:50:57 | |
Snow! HE LAUGHS | 0:50:59 | 0:51:02 | |
THEY LAUGH | 0:51:03 | 0:51:05 | |
# Gorwel Rhys has | 0:51:05 | 0:51:07 | |
# Gorwel Rhys has | 0:51:07 | 0:51:09 | |
# Gorwel Rhys has won a grand! | 0:51:09 | 0:51:11 | |
-# Gorwel Rhys has won a grand... # -A mad house, this is. | 0:51:11 | 0:51:17 | |
-I've won a grand! -Get down, Gorwel! -I've won a grand! -Gorwel! | 0:51:17 | 0:51:20 | |
When we finish with the presents, let's get sledging like. | 0:51:21 | 0:51:24 | |
But the snow has melted. | 0:51:24 | 0:51:26 | |
Oh, don't worry about that. We'll grease 'em up, and off we go. | 0:51:26 | 0:51:29 | |
-I really don't think this is a good idea. -Trust me, Bren. | 0:51:29 | 0:51:32 | |
I waited 15 years for it to snow, like. | 0:51:32 | 0:51:36 | |
Every dog has its day. | 0:51:36 | 0:51:38 | |
You're not an animal, Gorwel. | 0:51:38 | 0:51:41 | |
I'm the closest thing we've got. | 0:51:41 | 0:51:43 | |
-Come on, boys. -Geraint, we can't go tobogganing. | 0:51:46 | 0:51:50 | |
Talk some sense into him, will you? | 0:51:50 | 0:51:53 | |
Geraint! | 0:51:53 | 0:51:55 | |
Er...Gorwel... | 0:52:00 | 0:52:01 | |
Well, this is a stupid idea. I really don't think... | 0:52:03 | 0:52:06 | |
Oh, you worry too much, Bren. | 0:52:06 | 0:52:08 | |
Yes, well your problem is you don't worry enough, Gorwel. | 0:52:08 | 0:52:11 | |
I can't be doing with that pessimism stuff. | 0:52:11 | 0:52:14 | |
Who was it that said I'd never climbed Mount Everest, | 0:52:14 | 0:52:17 | |
-or take over Blankety Blank? -But you haven't. | 0:52:17 | 0:52:20 | |
Yet. | 0:52:20 | 0:52:22 | |
-Oh! -Come on then, boys. | 0:52:22 | 0:52:24 | |
Let's have it! | 0:52:24 | 0:52:26 | |
Now the key to winning a sledge race is all about coming down that hill as fast as you can. | 0:52:26 | 0:52:31 | |
You are going to go down the hill, down the hill. | 0:52:31 | 0:52:34 | |
What you mustn't do is think about going up the hill. | 0:52:34 | 0:52:37 | |
I'm not getting on the flaming sledge. | 0:52:37 | 0:52:39 | |
Don't be ridiculous, boy. How else are you going to win a sledge race? | 0:52:39 | 0:52:42 | |
You can't tell me what to do. | 0:52:42 | 0:52:44 | |
Are you disobeying me, boy? | 0:52:44 | 0:52:46 | |
I'm not a boy! I'm 16 in two weeks. | 0:52:46 | 0:52:49 | |
I will decide when you're 16, thank you very much. | 0:52:49 | 0:52:52 | |
Right now you're going to listen to me. | 0:52:52 | 0:52:54 | |
Everybody here is waiting for you to get on that sledge. | 0:52:54 | 0:52:57 | |
Do you want to be remembered as the one who spoilt everybody's fun? | 0:52:57 | 0:53:00 | |
No-one else thinks we should sledge. | 0:53:00 | 0:53:02 | |
Everyone except you and Gorwel wants to go home. | 0:53:02 | 0:53:06 | |
What, so you know that, do you? You know what everybody wants, do you? | 0:53:06 | 0:53:09 | |
Why don't you ask them? Go on. Let's have a vote. | 0:53:09 | 0:53:12 | |
Who thinks that we should sledge down this hill? | 0:53:12 | 0:53:15 | |
Well, I don't think much of the idea, to be honest. | 0:53:15 | 0:53:18 | |
It's treacherous, but, well, if Owen wants to. | 0:53:18 | 0:53:21 | |
I'm just worried that someone's going to get hurt, | 0:53:21 | 0:53:24 | |
but if Owen's got his heart set on it then... | 0:53:24 | 0:53:27 | |
I don't really fancy it. | 0:53:29 | 0:53:30 | |
There you go. You see? | 0:53:32 | 0:53:33 | |
No-one but you and Gorwel thinks that we should do it | 0:53:33 | 0:53:36 | |
-and Gorwel's not right in the head. -How dare you say that towards your Uncle Gorwel! | 0:53:36 | 0:53:40 | |
You said it yourself. | 0:53:40 | 0:53:41 | |
You said if there was any sense, | 0:53:41 | 0:53:43 | |
they'd lock him up in the aquarium and throw away the key. | 0:53:43 | 0:53:45 | |
He's distorting. I didn't... | 0:53:45 | 0:53:48 | |
-I'll tell you another thing, my boy... -I'm not your boy! | 0:53:48 | 0:53:50 | |
Yes, you flaming well are! Those tests were inconclusive. | 0:53:50 | 0:53:54 | |
I'm not anyone's boy. | 0:53:54 | 0:53:56 | |
I don't need you. | 0:53:56 | 0:53:57 | |
All you ever done for me is boss me around, talk down to me. | 0:53:57 | 0:54:01 | |
"Shut up, Maurice. Go over there, Maurice. | 0:54:01 | 0:54:03 | |
"Maurice, this is my girlfriend. | 0:54:03 | 0:54:05 | |
"She's a dog walker, but also does erotic dancing." | 0:54:05 | 0:54:08 | |
Nothing wrong with having a dual income. | 0:54:08 | 0:54:10 | |
Well, not this time. | 0:54:10 | 0:54:11 | |
This time you're going to do what I want, | 0:54:11 | 0:54:14 | |
and we're not sledging down that hill. | 0:54:14 | 0:54:17 | |
No-one is sledging down that hill. | 0:54:17 | 0:54:19 | |
Watch out! Watch out, Bren! | 0:54:19 | 0:54:23 | |
CRASH! | 0:54:23 | 0:54:24 | |
I told you one day it'd be me sitting around with my feet up. | 0:54:31 | 0:54:35 | |
You know what you did was very impressive. | 0:54:38 | 0:54:40 | |
Anybody can look at their father and say hero, | 0:54:41 | 0:54:44 | |
but you realised I'm just a man, | 0:54:44 | 0:54:46 | |
like Tom Jones, | 0:54:46 | 0:54:48 | |
and like Tom, I make mistakes. | 0:54:48 | 0:54:51 | |
In the New Year, I thought perhaps we could spend some more... | 0:54:54 | 0:54:59 | |
father and son time together. | 0:54:59 | 0:55:01 | |
Quality time. | 0:55:01 | 0:55:03 | |
Do you want to go to Alton Towers? | 0:55:05 | 0:55:08 | |
Yeah? Good lad, yeah, I know a couple of people there. | 0:55:08 | 0:55:11 | |
-Like Tom Jones, I'll get it shut down for the day so we can have it to ourselves. -Huw, come back. | 0:55:11 | 0:55:17 | |
Better go and help finish off. | 0:55:17 | 0:55:19 | |
What are you watching? | 0:55:22 | 0:55:24 | |
It's A Wonderful Life. | 0:55:24 | 0:55:27 | |
What happened? | 0:55:28 | 0:55:30 | |
This chap was depressed, and then it turns out that life is, er, wonderful. | 0:55:30 | 0:55:37 | |
Any good? | 0:55:38 | 0:55:41 | |
I quite liked it. | 0:55:41 | 0:55:44 | |
Everybody, please take you places at the table. The dinner is prepared. | 0:55:49 | 0:55:53 | |
-Come on, Bren. -Come on. | 0:55:53 | 0:55:56 | |
Ladies and gentlemen, sorry for the delay. | 0:56:00 | 0:56:02 | |
-The Rhys brothers proudly present the turkey. -Sandwiches. | 0:56:02 | 0:56:09 | |
Oh! | 0:56:09 | 0:56:11 | |
Do you know, I love a turkey sandwich. | 0:56:11 | 0:56:14 | |
Oh, hold on a minute, Bren. I made you a special sandwich, like. | 0:56:14 | 0:56:17 | |
-Oh! -There we are. -Thank you. | 0:56:17 | 0:56:21 | |
There we are. | 0:56:21 | 0:56:23 | |
Stilton. | 0:56:25 | 0:56:26 | |
Gorwel... | 0:56:32 | 0:56:34 | |
I don't actually like cheese. | 0:56:35 | 0:56:37 | |
What?! Gone off it, have you? | 0:56:37 | 0:56:40 | |
I've never liked it, I just didn't know how to tell you. | 0:56:40 | 0:56:45 | |
In that case, Bren, I apologise for having got you over ten years' worth of cheese and related paraphernalia. | 0:56:51 | 0:56:58 | |
It's the thought that counts. | 0:56:59 | 0:57:02 | |
I must admit, I'm a little relieved. | 0:57:04 | 0:57:06 | |
I was having a helluva time tracking down cheeses of Antarctic. | 0:57:06 | 0:57:10 | |
Merry Christmas, everyone. | 0:57:13 | 0:57:15 | |
ALL: Merry Christmas! | 0:57:15 | 0:57:17 | |
'So although every Christmas was the same - in a way, this one was a bit different. | 0:57:17 | 0:57:23 | |
'Huw had learned to value his son. | 0:57:23 | 0:57:26 | |
'My parents, to value each other. | 0:57:26 | 0:57:29 | |
'Gorwel had learned not to hurtle towards people on a toboggan. | 0:57:32 | 0:57:35 | |
'A lesson he sadly forgot only days later. | 0:57:35 | 0:57:39 | |
'And me, not sure what I learned really. | 0:57:40 | 0:57:44 | |
'But for what it's worth, I've passed it on. | 0:57:44 | 0:57:48 | |
'Merry Christmas.' | 0:57:48 | 0:57:50 | |
"WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS" PLAYS | 0:57:52 | 0:57:55 | |
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd | 0:58:23 | 0:58:26 |