Episode 1 Dead Boss


Episode 1

Similar Content

Browse content similar to Episode 1. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!

Transcript


LineFromTo

How do you think it's going?

0:00:030:00:05

Well, the jury's found you guilty, Helen.

0:00:050:00:07

So, in my professional opinion,

0:00:070:00:09

I think that means you did it.

0:00:090:00:13

Helen Stephens.

0:00:130:00:14

You have been found guilty of murder.

0:00:140:00:17

Your victim was your employer, Eric Bridges,

0:00:190:00:21

a family man who tragically leaves behind a thriving business,

0:00:210:00:26

and a grieving, pint-sized second wife.

0:00:260:00:31

You have shown no remorse for the frenzied attack

0:00:310:00:33

that was to last an entire bank holiday weekend.

0:00:330:00:38

Who keeps up a frenzy for three days?

0:00:380:00:40

Say that! Say it!

0:00:400:00:42

(SHOUTING) Who keeps up a frenzy for...?

0:00:420:00:44

Forget it. Doesn't matter.

0:00:480:00:49

Do you have anything to say before I pass sentence?

0:00:490:00:51

Yes, I have. I'm supposed to be getting married...

0:00:510:00:56

-You have been found guilty...

-..as soon my fiance turns up

0:00:560:00:58

-and gives me my alibi, this whole...

-..I now sentence you

0:00:580:01:01

to twelve years.

0:01:010:01:02

Wha..?!

0:01:020:01:03

GASPS

0:01:030:01:05

Objection!

0:01:050:01:07

Too long?

0:01:070:01:09

Sit down, Mr Norman!

0:01:090:01:10

Mum! Dad! You've got to believe, I didn't...

0:01:100:01:12

-..Laura!

-Helen!

0:01:120:01:14

-You've got to help me find Justin!

-Wait, please! She's my sister!

0:01:140:01:17

-I need to speak to my sister! Helen!

-Laura!

0:01:170:01:19

Can I have your Fitness First card?

0:01:190:01:21

And the keys to your flat? Helen?

0:01:210:01:24

Helen!

0:01:240:01:25

'Dear Maurice, thank you for your postcard.

0:01:400:01:43

'The answer is, yes.

0:01:430:01:45

'I would love to be your prison pen pal.

0:01:450:01:47

'Although our correspondence may be short-lived,

0:01:470:01:49

'partly because I intend to clear my name

0:01:490:01:51

'but mainly because you're on death row.'

0:01:510:01:54

Come on!

0:01:540:01:56

'I've been in Broadmarsh for two weeks now

0:01:560:01:58

'and every day is like one of those nightmares

0:01:580:02:00

'where you realise you've been revising for the wrong exam

0:02:000:02:03

'and then you wake up

0:02:030:02:04

'and find you've been falsely imprisoned for murdering your boss.

0:02:040:02:08

'The thing I'm finding hardest to cope with is the lack of privacy.

0:02:080:02:12

'Personal space has always been very important to me.

0:02:120:02:16

'My cell mate, Christine, has made me feel most welcome

0:02:160:02:18

'but, as I tried to explain to her, now isn't the right time for me

0:02:180:02:21

'to take on an emotionally disturbed arsonist as a best friend.'

0:02:210:02:25

TOILET FLUSHES

0:02:290:02:31

INMATES SHOUT AND ARGUE

0:02:310:02:34

BOARD SMASHES

0:02:360:02:39

SHE MOUTHS

0:02:400:02:42

'I haven't encountered the top dog yet, but rumour has it,

0:02:450:02:48

'she once paper cut an inmate to death with a copy of TV Quick.

0:02:480:02:52

'I've heard she's not left her cell in nine years.

0:02:520:02:54

'I had a similar experience when I first got my hair permed.

0:02:540:02:57

'But then I discovered Frizz Ease.

0:02:570:02:58

'I've got a meeting with my lawyer now

0:02:580:03:00

'and hopefully he'll have some news about my appeal

0:03:000:03:03

'and where my fiance and alibi might be.

0:03:030:03:05

'Maybe when I get out, I can come and visit you.

0:03:050:03:07

'Or is that just rubbing it in?'

0:03:070:03:10

For you!

0:03:120:03:13

No thanks, I've just eaten a carbonara.

0:03:150:03:17

I think.

0:03:170:03:19

Did you see Secret Millionaire last night?

0:03:190:03:21

No.

0:03:210:03:23

It was BRILLIANT!

0:03:230:03:25

Don't worry. I've Sky Plussed it.

0:03:250:03:28

I can save it for up to two months.

0:03:280:03:30

When are you out, again?

0:03:300:03:31

In twelve years.

0:03:310:03:33

Twelve years! Don't know if I can...

0:03:330:03:36

I'll look at the manual.

0:03:360:03:37

God, look at this place.

0:03:390:03:40

You shouldn't be in here. No-one should.

0:03:400:03:43

She should.

0:03:430:03:45

SHE GROWLS

0:03:450:03:47

Yeah, she should.

0:03:480:03:50

Apart from her.

0:03:500:03:52

-Right! It's your appeal! Eh?

-Yeah.

0:03:520:03:54

Exciting!

0:03:540:03:55

Ooh...

0:03:550:03:57

I'm not going to mince around the bush with you, Helen.

0:03:570:04:00

I'm going to say it straight.

0:04:000:04:02

When am I going to get paid?

0:04:020:04:04

What? You told me it was no win, no fee!

0:04:040:04:07

I did not say no win, no fee.

0:04:070:04:09

I definitely said no win, SOME fee.

0:04:090:04:13

-Well, how much do we owe you?

-About five grand.

0:04:130:04:15

Five grand?!

0:04:150:04:17

Shhhh! Keep your voice down!

0:04:170:04:18

Look, I'm definitely still on the case

0:04:180:04:21

but I don't know if I can give you

0:04:210:04:24

the full Tony magic until I get paid.

0:04:240:04:28

I mean, I'll do what I can

0:04:280:04:30

but, in all honesty, it's going to be half-arsed.

0:04:300:04:33

-At best.

-What about the leads I gave you? Mr Bridges...

0:04:330:04:36

Helen, Helen, Helen, Helen!

0:04:360:04:38

Shush!

0:04:380:04:40

You're bombarding me with information.

0:04:400:04:42

Well, have you tracked down my fiance?

0:04:420:04:43

Remind me, what's his involvement?

0:04:430:04:45

He's my alibi!

0:04:450:04:46

He was with me the night of the murder.

0:04:460:04:48

Remind me, what was his name?

0:04:480:04:50

Justin.

0:04:500:04:52

Is that with a J or a G?

0:04:520:04:53

-BELL RINGS

-Ooh! Saved by the bell!

0:04:530:04:57

Look, as soon as you "free me up" with some cash,

0:04:570:05:01

I promise I'll be on the case 150%.

0:05:010:05:04

More, even.

0:05:040:05:06

Tony?

0:05:060:05:08

I will get out of here, won't I?

0:05:080:05:11

You will DEFINITELY get out of here,

0:05:110:05:15

one day.

0:05:150:05:16

May the peace be with you,

0:05:170:05:19

and also with you.

0:05:190:05:20

INMATES SHOUT AND ARGUE

0:05:270:05:29

Hi, Helen!

0:05:290:05:31

I was thinking, we ought to have a cell warming party.

0:05:310:05:33

You know, put some banners up,

0:05:330:05:36

set light to a bin.

0:05:360:05:38

Where are you going?

0:05:380:05:39

To see the governor about my appeal.

0:05:390:05:41

What do you think, hair up or down?

0:05:410:05:43

Either way, you look stunning.

0:05:430:05:44

Like an old Christine Bleakley.

0:05:440:05:47

Wait, you're appealing? Why?

0:05:470:05:49

Well, because I need to get out of here.

0:05:490:05:51

What?!

0:05:510:05:53

Oh, right, well, thanks!

0:05:530:05:56

Thanks a lot!

0:05:560:05:58

First Monique, then Brenda, then Tizita, then Eugenie,

0:05:580:06:01

and now you!

0:06:010:06:02

Why does everyone I get close to leave me?

0:06:040:06:07

Or get burned a bit?

0:06:070:06:08

This has nothing to do with you!

0:06:080:06:10

This is about the fact that I'm innocent

0:06:100:06:12

and I need to get out of here and get on with my life.

0:06:120:06:14

I'm 38, Christine.

0:06:140:06:15

If I wait, there's a strong chance my wedding photos

0:06:150:06:18

will be really disappointing.

0:06:180:06:20

SHE CHUCKLES

0:06:200:06:21

Oh! Oh.

0:06:230:06:24

Well, yes, you can appeal. Of course.

0:06:240:06:26

Really?! What, you...you believe me?

0:06:260:06:29

Yes, I "believe" you.

0:06:290:06:31

And I will do everything I can, as Governor, to help you.

0:06:330:06:36

But can I give you a little piece of advice?

0:06:360:06:38

Appeals can take a very, very long time,

0:06:380:06:41

and they don't always work.

0:06:410:06:43

But you know what does always work in prison?

0:06:430:06:45

Oh, erm...hunger strike?

0:06:450:06:47

Getting stuck in!

0:06:470:06:49

-SHE LAUGHS

-Yeah, but I'm innocent

0:06:490:06:52

and I just want to start the...

0:06:520:06:53

That's even more reason why you should join the drama club!

0:06:530:06:56

Use your time well.

0:06:560:06:58

Practise your table tennis serve.

0:06:580:07:00

Design your own tattoo.

0:07:000:07:02

Think of today as the first day

0:07:020:07:04

of the rest of your life sentence.

0:07:040:07:07

Yeah, but...

0:07:070:07:09

what's the first step of the appeal process?

0:07:090:07:12

The first step is to be patient.

0:07:120:07:13

And the second step, before you ask,

0:07:130:07:16

is to be realistic.

0:07:160:07:18

You're going to be stuck in here for a very, very long time.

0:07:180:07:22

But what's the first step of the appeals process?

0:07:240:07:28

It would be a dreadful thing, wouldn't it,

0:07:280:07:30

to have your case reopened and your sentence increased?

0:07:300:07:32

Which means it would become longer.

0:07:320:07:35

So I'll leave it with you to make the right decision.

0:07:350:07:38

Cindy, will you send in Officers Frank and Tim, please?

0:07:500:07:55

That wet bitch, Stephens, is after an appeal.

0:07:580:08:01

THEY GROAN

0:08:010:08:03

I can't help but take this very, very personally.

0:08:030:08:07

I wonder if there's something we might do to change her mind.

0:08:070:08:10

Um, Margaret,

0:08:100:08:11

perhaps I could have a word with her.

0:08:110:08:14

I don't mean to speak out of turn,

0:08:140:08:16

but I think I'm one of the few wardens here

0:08:160:08:19

who could really get inside that head of hers.

0:08:190:08:21

I seem to have a unique bond

0:08:210:08:23

with some of the more troubled inmates.

0:08:230:08:25

I'm like a horse whisperer.

0:08:250:08:28

For women.

0:08:280:08:29

-HE SNIGGERS

-Something to say?

0:08:290:08:31

Get over yourself, woman whisperer!

0:08:310:08:34

I totally have a unique bond with them, Ma'am.

0:08:340:08:37

In my pants. HE SHUDDERS

0:08:370:08:40

I don't give a sheep's teat which one of you does it,

0:08:400:08:42

just get it done. That'll be all, gentlemen.

0:08:420:08:45

Hold the bucket lower!

0:08:490:08:52

'You probably have a better idea of how

0:08:520:08:55

'the sick mind of a twisted killer works, Maurice,

0:08:550:08:58

'but I've got a nagging feeling whoever did kill Mr Bridges

0:08:580:09:02

'is still very much on the scene.

0:09:020:09:04

'For a man who sold ceramic tiling,

0:09:040:09:06

'Eric certainly had a lot of enemies.

0:09:060:09:08

'I wonder how everyone at Entirely Tiles is coping with his loss?

0:09:080:09:11

'You know what they say, "While the cat's away, the mice will play."

0:09:110:09:14

'And by "cat", I mean, "dead boss".

0:09:140:09:16

'And by "mice", I mean the marketing team.'

0:09:160:09:19

Hi, Mary.

0:09:190:09:21

I've got a card here for Helen.

0:09:210:09:23

To let her know we're all thinking of her.

0:09:230:09:25

-Have you got a message?

-Yeah!

0:09:250:09:27

Tell her, I hope she rots there!

0:09:270:09:29

Is this about your mayonnaise, Mary?

0:09:290:09:31

This is NOT about my mayonnaise.

0:09:310:09:34

Although it was clearly marked as mine.

0:09:340:09:36

This is about her murdering

0:09:360:09:38

the best boss I've ever had.

0:09:380:09:41

Helen didn't murder anyone, Mary.

0:09:410:09:42

It's all just been a silly mistake.

0:09:420:09:44

You tell her I said I always knew she was a bad egg!

0:09:440:09:47

Life in prison is the best thing that could've happened to her.

0:09:470:09:51

Right, well...

0:09:510:09:53

..I might just put that in my own words, if that's OK.

0:09:550:09:57

I'm going to hand deliver it when I visit.

0:09:590:10:02

I hope I don't get locked in too!

0:10:020:10:04

With Helen.

0:10:060:10:07

SHE HITS STAPLER VIOLENTLY

0:10:070:10:09

She can't intimidate me into not appealing.

0:10:240:10:26

That's against my human rights...

0:10:260:10:28

probably.

0:10:280:10:30

Did she do that when you tried to appeal?

0:10:300:10:32

I've never bothered. Appealing's not for me.

0:10:320:10:35

I think once you're in, you're in.

0:10:350:10:36

But I'm a typical Sagittarius like that.

0:10:360:10:38

SHE GIGGLES

0:10:380:10:40

Bloody hell! What are you doing?

0:10:400:10:43

I'm sitting down to eat my...

0:10:430:10:45

I'm going to go with carbonara again?

0:10:450:10:47

That's Top Dog's table.

0:10:470:10:50

But she's not here, is she? It's empty.

0:10:500:10:51

It's how it works here, Helen.

0:10:510:10:53

If you can't handle it, you know what you can do.

0:10:530:10:55

-What?

-Nothing. There's nothing you can do.

0:10:550:10:58

You can't tell people where they can sit and can't sit.

0:10:580:11:02

OK? We are human beings, not...

0:11:020:11:04

..children.

0:11:050:11:06

We're talking about Top Dog here.

0:11:060:11:09

She once blinded someone with a cheese straw.

0:11:090:11:13

Really? Well, that doesn't scare me, and you know why?

0:11:130:11:17

Because I'm not scared of cheese.

0:11:180:11:20

SHE SLAMS TRAY DOWN

0:11:200:11:22

INMATES ARE SILENCED

0:11:220:11:24

Come on, Christine.

0:11:360:11:38

Come on, Christine! You can do this.

0:11:460:11:50

You're doing it!

0:11:510:11:52

I'm doing it!

0:11:520:11:53

You go, girl!

0:11:550:11:56

Me, go, me!

0:11:570:11:59

-Helen?

-Yeah?

0:12:110:12:14

You make me a better woman.

0:12:140:12:17

Night night.

0:12:170:12:18

WOMAN SCREAMS

0:12:240:12:26

WOMAN SCREAMS

0:12:300:12:34

Arms up!

0:12:340:12:37

Ow!

0:12:420:12:43

That's for your girlfriend's minge.

0:12:450:12:47

She's not my girlfriend.

0:12:470:12:48

She's my cell mate.

0:12:480:12:50

Oh, Helen! That is lovely.

0:12:510:12:53

You're my soul mate too.

0:12:530:12:54

You were washing your girlfriend's flaps

0:12:540:12:57

under Top Dog's favourite showerhead, bitch.

0:12:570:13:00

Well, first of all, anyone with eyes can see

0:13:000:13:03

I wasn't washing her flaps.

0:13:030:13:05

And secondly, I know a lot of gay people.

0:13:050:13:07

Well, a gay man, anyway, and...

0:13:070:13:09

I don't want to hear you talking. It sounds shit.

0:13:090:13:11

Top Dog heard about your little performance in the canteen.

0:13:110:13:15

She ain't happy.

0:13:150:13:16

Well...

0:13:160:13:18

if you'd just let me finish my ablutions, then we can talk, but...

0:13:180:13:21

This is from Top Dog.

0:13:210:13:23

Pumice 'em right up.

0:13:230:13:25

THEY SCREAM

0:13:250:13:27

SCRUBBING NOISES

0:13:270:13:29

Calm down, for shit's sake!

0:13:330:13:35

It's nothing I haven't already seen on CCTV!

0:13:350:13:38

HE LAUGHS

0:13:380:13:40

Who did that?

0:13:400:13:42

I'm very disappointed in this posse.

0:13:460:13:48

Now, get out to the yard!

0:13:490:13:51

I said, get out to the yard!

0:13:520:13:56

Get out to the yard, please?

0:13:580:14:00

Please, get out to the yard?

0:14:000:14:02

Let's go.

0:14:020:14:04

I forgot my Veet.

0:14:130:14:14

Word of advice.

0:14:160:14:17

Don't drop the soap.

0:14:170:14:19

But this is a women's prison.

0:14:190:14:21

And?

0:14:210:14:23

Well, that only really works in men's prisons.

0:14:230:14:26

Don't get smart with me, flapjack.

0:14:270:14:29

How you doing today, Stephens?

0:14:340:14:35

Not that great, I've been wrongly imprisoned.

0:14:350:14:38

What are you, a 32B?

0:14:380:14:40

-What?

-I see you looking at me.

0:14:400:14:41

You don't have to deny it.

0:14:410:14:43

-I deny it!

-HE SNIGGERS

0:14:430:14:46

Maybe I'm not the right person to be talking to you like this,

0:14:460:14:48

given that I'm a warden and you're getting urges.

0:14:480:14:52

But I'm telling you man to woman

0:14:520:14:56

that you need to forget about appealing.

0:14:560:14:59

And if you do, I might just find a way

0:14:590:15:02

to make you feel a little happier in here.

0:15:020:15:05

And down there.

0:15:050:15:07

What do you say?

0:15:080:15:10

I'm a 34C, actually.

0:15:100:15:12

But how much of that is ribcage?

0:15:120:15:13

You've come to the right place, Mrs Cole.

0:15:170:15:19

It's a terrible, terrible thing that's happened.

0:15:190:15:23

But believe me when I say,

0:15:230:15:25

that petting zoo won't know what's hit it.

0:15:250:15:28

Do you know, in a way, I'm glad this happened.

0:15:280:15:32

Because if a child can't touch a goat without getting nipped,

0:15:320:15:36

it makes a mockery of the entire petting system.

0:15:360:15:39

CRASHING NOISE

0:15:390:15:41

What was that? Is someone in there?

0:15:410:15:44

Ssshh! Ssshh!

0:15:440:15:45

HE YELLS

0:15:470:15:49

You should be ashamed of yourself!

0:15:520:15:55

Please don't bite me again, Mummy!

0:15:550:15:58

I'd give it a minute.

0:16:100:16:12

SHE SPRAYS AIR FRESHENER

0:16:120:16:15

Mmm! Lavender. Very calming.

0:16:170:16:20

Also good for boils.

0:16:200:16:22

How are you doing today, Helen?

0:16:230:16:25

Not that great. I've been wrongly imprisoned.

0:16:250:16:28

I know you don't mean to, but sometimes you give off a vibe

0:16:280:16:31

like you don't want to be here.

0:16:310:16:32

A little birdie told me you were after an appeal.

0:16:320:16:36

(WHISPERS) Is that really how you want to play it?

0:16:360:16:39

Always thinking the grass is greener on the other side?

0:16:390:16:42

Carpe Diem, Helen. Do you know what that means?

0:16:420:16:45

What will be, will be.

0:16:450:16:48

Carpe diem, di-em. Do you know what I mean?

0:16:480:16:52

No.

0:16:520:16:53

Is this really the worst place to be? Eh?

0:16:540:16:56

BLOODCURDLING SCREAM

0:16:560:16:59

You want to lighten up, little lady!

0:16:590:17:01

Let your hair down. Enjoy yourself, yeah?

0:17:010:17:04

Right, get yourself down to the visitor's room.

0:17:050:17:09

Your sister's here. She has some horrific news to break to you.

0:17:090:17:12

So how come there's no hot water during the day?

0:17:140:17:16

This is the horrific news?!

0:17:160:17:18

I told them our stepfather had been kicked in the face by a horse.

0:17:180:17:21

We don't have a stepfather!

0:17:210:17:23

Well, we definitely don't any more.

0:17:230:17:25

So how comes I can't have a bath at three?

0:17:250:17:27

Because it's on a timer.

0:17:270:17:29

So how can I change that?

0:17:290:17:30

Change the timer!

0:17:300:17:32

Can you call a plumber?

0:17:320:17:34

I get one phone token a week.

0:17:340:17:35

I was going to use it to get out of prison.

0:17:350:17:37

But you're right, I should use it

0:17:370:17:38

-so you can have a hot bath in the afternoon.

-Sweet!

0:17:380:17:41

-Where you going?

-I've got to get back to my flat.

0:17:410:17:43

-My flat!

-THE flat.

0:17:430:17:45

How are Mum and Dad?

0:17:460:17:48

Not great.

0:17:480:17:49

Apparently, someone at the golf club found out about your conviction

0:17:490:17:53

and it's made it very awkward for them to drink in the clubhouse.

0:17:530:17:55

So do you think it's a bad time to ask for money,

0:17:550:17:57

because Tony can't continue...?

0:17:570:17:59

You can't ask them for money, Helen!

0:17:590:18:01

It's not fair. They're old, they're retired,

0:18:010:18:03

and they've enough on their plate paying off my student loan.

0:18:030:18:06

Right, see you.

0:18:060:18:07

Don't forget to call the plumber, yeah?

0:18:070:18:10

Aargh! What are you doing? No! No!

0:18:170:18:20

Christine!

0:18:220:18:23

Lesbos!

0:18:250:18:26

All right, what is going on?

0:18:260:18:28

I want to know why there's been some misbehaving

0:18:280:18:31

from you two Chatham Pockets.

0:18:310:18:33

-Well...

-Because, b-b-because, you, you,

0:18:330:18:37

you can't go around telling people where we can sit and can't sit.

0:18:370:18:41

W-w-we are human beings!

0:18:410:18:44

Not children!

0:18:440:18:46

Oh, I see. It's like that, is it?

0:18:460:18:48

Yeah, yeah, it is.

0:18:480:18:50

I might be in prison,

0:18:500:18:51

but I still have a choice.

0:18:510:18:53

And I no longer choose to eat standing up.

0:18:530:18:57

And as my cell mate, Helen, said,

0:18:570:18:59

you're just a nasty piece of work

0:18:590:19:02

who, like all bullies, picks on the weedy.

0:19:020:19:04

I didn't say that!

0:19:040:19:07

Because, to quote Helen,

0:19:070:19:08

"You're nothing but a lowlife excuse for a human being,

0:19:080:19:11

"who hides behind a group of mentally stunted..."

0:19:110:19:15

Helen was going to say "trolls",

0:19:150:19:18

but she said that would be insulting to trolls, so she said, "rat women,

0:19:180:19:21

"who trail after you like a long string of shit

0:19:210:19:25

"from a goldfish's bum hole."

0:19:250:19:28

I have...I've been COMPLETELY taken out of context!

0:19:280:19:32

Did I say that Helen then did an impression of you? Like... SHE SNORTS

0:19:320:19:36

To be fair, I had no idea what you looked like.

0:19:360:19:41

It's you!

0:19:450:19:47

Everyone, get out...

0:19:480:19:50

..NOW.

0:19:520:19:54

HE URINATES

0:19:540:19:57

DOOR OPENS LOUDLY

0:20:010:20:03

It's me, Helen Stephens!

0:20:200:20:22

You were my supply teacher at Mount Hill Senior School?

0:20:220:20:25

When Miss Seaward was having her hysterectomy?

0:20:250:20:27

Oh, my God!

0:20:270:20:29

What happened to you?

0:20:290:20:30

Well, well, well,

0:20:300:20:32

well, well, well, well.

0:20:320:20:34

Well.

0:20:350:20:37

We meet again.

0:20:370:20:39

Miss Grainger!

0:20:390:20:40

I barely recognized you without your underbite!

0:20:400:20:44

When'd you get your head brace off?

0:20:440:20:46

It was worth it. Your teeth look great!

0:20:460:20:48

Don't you talk about my teeth.

0:20:480:20:50

I don't want you to look at my teeth.

0:20:500:20:52

I don't want you to think about my teeth.

0:20:520:20:55

I don't want you to touch my teeth.

0:20:550:20:56

OK. I wasn't going to touch your...

0:20:560:20:59

You little shit!

0:20:590:21:01

You thought you were so clever back then, didn't you?

0:21:010:21:04

Oh, ha-ha-ha!

0:21:040:21:06

The supply teacher's got a head brace!

0:21:060:21:08

Let's all wear a coat hanger on our face to school.

0:21:080:21:11

Oh, hee-hee-hee!

0:21:110:21:13

Let's all hum continuously for an entire double period.

0:21:130:21:16

SHE HUMS

0:21:160:21:19

Oh, I know.

0:21:240:21:26

Let's spray paint "paedo" on the side of Miss Grainger's car,

0:21:260:21:29

when all she'd done was send a sixth former a Valentine's Day card.

0:21:290:21:34

Oh, come on. I was 15! That's not important!

0:21:340:21:37

We're in prison!

0:21:370:21:38

What's important now is that we stick together...

0:21:380:21:41

I might not have become an evil recluse,

0:21:410:21:43

if it wasn't for you, Stephens.

0:21:430:21:45

But as I now am one, I'm going to make the most of it.

0:21:470:21:51

I want you looking over your shoulder

0:21:510:21:54

every day you're in here.

0:21:540:21:56

Every move you make.

0:21:560:21:58

God!

0:21:580:22:00

I don't know what to say.

0:22:000:22:01

Sorry, I suppose.

0:22:010:22:03

Sorry I turned you into an evil recluse,

0:22:030:22:06

it was just a bit of fun that...

0:22:060:22:07

Too little, too late!

0:22:090:22:13

I'm the mummy here. You understand?

0:22:130:22:16

I'm...the mummy!

0:22:160:22:20

SHE BLOWS ON MAGAZINE

0:22:200:22:22

You're a dead bitch walking, Stephens.

0:22:220:22:26

SHE BLOWS ON MAGAZINE

0:22:260:22:29

OK!

0:22:290:22:30

But I can't help thinking

0:22:300:22:32

you might not want people knowing what I know.

0:22:320:22:34

Who you really are.

0:22:340:22:37

Which is, as far as I can remember,

0:22:370:22:40

a fully-grown woman who wet herself

0:22:400:22:42

in front of a class of 15-year-old girls.

0:22:420:22:45

You wouldn't dare.

0:22:470:22:49

(SHE GROWLS) Try me.

0:22:490:22:50

SHE COUGHS

0:22:520:22:54

THEY MOUTH

0:22:580:23:00

Can I help you?

0:23:080:23:10

It's me! It's Henry!

0:23:100:23:12

Henry Keating? From Contracts?

0:23:130:23:15

I've got the desk by the weeping fig plant.

0:23:150:23:18

Oh, yeah! No, of course!

0:23:180:23:21

Henry! It's good to see you. How did you...?

0:23:210:23:24

Your sister sorted it.

0:23:240:23:25

Apparently there's an hour-long episode of Eastenders on tonight,

0:23:250:23:29

so she'd have struggled to get back for that.

0:23:290:23:31

I see.

0:23:310:23:33

For you.

0:23:330:23:35

Well, I must say, prison agrees with you.

0:23:370:23:40

You look tickety-boo!

0:23:400:23:42

Thank you.

0:23:420:23:44

So how are things going with your appeal?

0:23:440:23:47

Not good.

0:23:470:23:49

My lawyer's on a go-slow until he gets paid.

0:23:490:23:52

Well, I don't want to seem over familiar,

0:23:520:23:54

but if you need some money...

0:23:540:23:56

Oh, no, I couldn't possibly!

0:23:560:23:58

-I insist.

-No, that's too generous.

0:23:580:23:59

How much do you need?

0:23:590:24:01

Five grand. It's about five grand.

0:24:010:24:03

Right, well...

0:24:070:24:09

let's start with this £75.

0:24:090:24:14

I've easily got the rest tied up in my car.

0:24:140:24:19

Let me sell that and I'll transfer the cash into your lawyer's account

0:24:190:24:23

before you can say, "permanent visitors' pass!"

0:24:230:24:25

I don't know what to...

0:24:270:24:29

Oh, I don't know what to say, Henry.

0:24:290:24:31

Thank you?

0:24:310:24:32

Oh, thank you.

0:24:320:24:34

Now, is there anything else I can do for you?

0:24:350:24:38

Do you want me to read to you or...?

0:24:380:24:39

Well, maybe.

0:24:390:24:41

Do you think you could check something for me?

0:24:410:24:43

Course.

0:24:430:24:46

Well, the day before Mr Bridges died,

0:24:460:24:47

he asked me to courier a parcel.

0:24:470:24:49

And he asked me to pay by cash, not account.

0:24:490:24:51

I remember thinking, "That's odd."

0:24:510:24:53

Why wouldn't you put it through the business?

0:24:530:24:55

I can't help thinking it's to do with the murder.

0:24:550:24:58

Right.

0:24:580:24:59

So what's this?

0:24:590:25:01

I've just been playing it over and over in my head,

0:25:010:25:03

trying to remember the address on the package

0:25:030:25:06

and, well, this is the closest I've got.

0:25:060:25:08

Mashta Fembwick.

0:25:080:25:11

2090 Toadpole TS.

0:25:120:25:16

Manchasteton, IE.

0:25:160:25:19

Well, this changes everything.

0:25:200:25:23

-It's not an address that makes much sense to me...

-Helen!

0:25:230:25:26

That's what Google's for. Leave it with me.

0:25:260:25:29

Thank you, Henry.

0:25:290:25:31

I can't tell you what a relief it is to have someone

0:25:310:25:33

-who actually wants to help.

-It's funny, isn't it?

0:25:330:25:35

Because when we worked together, the only conversation we ever had

0:25:350:25:38

was when you asked me if I was in the queue for Curry Club.

0:25:380:25:41

Yeah, it's funny how things work out!

0:25:410:25:43

But now, you NEED me.

0:25:430:25:46

I mean, you're totally dependent on me.

0:25:460:25:48

Yeah, well, it's very kind of you to help me.

0:25:480:25:51

And I'm going to call my lawyer and try and get him back on the case.

0:25:510:25:54

Thanks again, Henry.

0:25:550:25:56

It's no problem.

0:25:560:25:58

I will LITERALLY bend over backwards

0:25:580:26:01

to get you out of this hell hole.

0:26:010:26:03

HE SNIFFS

0:26:100:26:13

Oh, OK.

0:26:130:26:14

-Bye!

-Oh, Jesus!

0:26:260:26:28

-ANSWERPHONE BEEPS

-'Tony! Good news!

0:26:300:26:33

'I've got your money!

0:26:330:26:35

'Well, £75 of it, anyway.

0:26:350:26:36

'Oh, and I've remembered an address that might be important.

0:26:360:26:39

'It could really help with the appeal. So, yay!

0:26:390:26:41

'Oh, this is Helen from prison, by the way.'

0:26:410:26:43

HE WHIMPERS

0:26:490:26:51

'Dear Maurice, thank you for your postcard.

0:26:510:26:54

'In response to your query, the answer is, yes, on occasion.

0:26:540:26:57

'but only when I'm in a committed relationship.

0:26:570:27:00

'I'm sorry to break this news to you by letter,

0:27:000:27:02

'but it looks like my visit to Kansas will have to be delayed.

0:27:020:27:06

'My appeal is taking longer than I envisaged.

0:27:060:27:09

'Although there is a small ray of light.

0:27:090:27:11

'My ex-colleague, Henry, has offered to help me.

0:27:110:27:13

'God bless him, whoever he is!

0:27:130:27:16

'I'm trying to stay strong, but it is hard.

0:27:160:27:19

'In many ways I envy you, Maurice.

0:27:190:27:21

'I wish my own future was as certain as yours.

0:27:210:27:24

'Anyhoo, write soon.

0:27:240:27:25

'All the best, Helen.'

0:27:270:27:28

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:28:010:28:05

Download Subtitles

SRT

ASS