One Man, Three Wives with Yalda Hakim Our World

wives in polygamous marriages has just come into force in Kenya. For

Our World, Yalda Hakim has been to find out what life is like for

polygamous men and their wives. A man in Kenya can marry a second wife

and his first wife need never know. And then he can marry another one

and another one and another one, all with the blessing of the government.

I hate polygyny. I don't think it is right at all. When you marry an

African woman, she must know that the second one is on the way, the

third one is on the way, the fourth one is on the way. A new Kenyan law

gives polygamous marriages the same status as monogamous ones and legal

recognition to the multiple wives. Is this a return to traditional

African values? Or is it the beginning of a new battle of the

sexes. In the heart of East Africa's rift

Valley, like generations of Maasai women before her, Mary is making

breakfast for her husband. A few metres away in another small

building, choice is also making breakfast for her husband. And

outside in the chilly dawn, Alice is getting milk for her husband's

morning tea. All three women are married to the same man. Is I is 76

years old `` Isaiah. He has three wives, 16 children and 48

grandchildren. Alice is as they're's first wife and as such has

some authority over the other's. The women had little say in when or

who they were to marry. Mary was only 16 when she was told she was to

become a second wife. After 40 years of marriage, she says

she feels no jealousy and is glad to have co` wives.

But Joyce, Isaiah's third wife, would have preferred it if things

had been different. Each wife has her own house, which

she shares with her children. What is the relationship life with your

husband? And they take good care of you? Yes,

they love, they love. All of Isaiah's sums are being educated and

some have been to university. But for his daughters, the only choice

is marriage. Polygamous marriage. And they could go on to become

second, third or even fourth wives. Maasai community worker Joyce 's

clear where she stands on polygyny. I hate polygyny. I don't think it is

right at all. No matter what they say.

This 56`year`old woman was just 15 when she was married off to a much

older man who already had a wife. Initially, the teenager was

miserable but grew to love her husband and they had ten children.

But that was not enough for him. She had married her husband in a

traditional way and like most such marriages, it was not registered

with the authorities, so despite having ten children, she could not

actually prove they had been married. And that meant that when

her husband died, she had few rights to his land and property and faced

being disinherited. Now, she gets by with a market stall and by sharing a

house with her husband's third wife. But Kenya's new marriage act for the

first time gives legal recognition to such marriages. And it requires

that each marriage is registered. Women's groups and campaigners have

been trying for decades to get this law passed because they say it

protects women in polygamous marriages. Winnie is one of the few

women to make it into Kenya's parliament.

But she voted for the bill because although she believes polygyny is

wrong, the new law does at least offer some protection to wives. She

herself is in a vulnerable position. Her marriage is a traditional one

and is not registered. If her husband died, she could be

disinherited, and even while he is alive, she has little power in the

relationship. Your husband can bring another

woman? During the debate on this new marriage law, MPs, most of them men,

voted down a controversial clause which would have forced any man

wanting to take another wife to tell existing wives of their intention.

Not to ask permission but merely to inform them. If you are the man of

the house and you choose to bring home another party and make it two

or three, it behoves you to be man enough to agree that you... When you

marry an African woman, she must know that a second one is on the

way, the third one is on the way, the fourth one is on the way. This

is Africa, mistress weaker. This is not Europe, Mr Speaker. This is not

America. Opponents to the clause say there

isn't any point making laws no one will follow.

Like many educated urban women, Wanjiku Muhia is clear what she

would do if her husband brought home a second wife.

This man runs a men's empowerment group, because he is convinced

Kenyan men have a hard time. I was struck by the fact that these

men strongly believe that as women have gained more rights in Kenya,

they have somehow been deprived of their rights and they really have

quite strong grievances. And look for a third and fourth.

What makes men think that if the first and second doesn't respect

you, a third and fourth wheel? `` will?

It is not just in rural areas where this entrant tradition is practised.

Polygamy is flourishing in the heart of Nairobi `` ancient tradition. In

Africa's largest slum, this man splits his time between two wives

who live ten minutes apart. He first married Veronica 17 years ago and

they have five children. When things went wrong, he took radical action.

The couple had had a customary wedding and he comes from the tribe

where polygamy is common. Neither of his wives rely on him for

money to raise the children. They compete for his attention. One

source of conflict is the amount of time he spent in each home. Do you

think two nights a month is too little? Two nights per month? No. I

am saying no. Tell the truth. Last month... OK. Only last month is when

he gave me three days. Always two days or one day. Living just a few

streets away was his second wife, Bridget. He married her six years

ago and they have three children. She felt the wrath of the first wife

from the start. Despite the obvious stressors,

Morris has been married to two different women `` says being

married to two different women has its compensations.

The sense I am getting from the man that I am speaking to is that

polygamy works and that the relationships can be balanced. When

I speak to the women, they are deeply upset. Especially the first

wives, who don't welcome the arrival of a new woman into their

relationships. The marriage is always controlled by a man.

Campaigners are encouraging Kenyan women to consider the option of a

civil or church marriage, which doesn't allow polygamy. This law has

divided the country. Some see it as safeguarding African Customs. Others

accuse it of being sexist and old`fashioned. This makes a woman

feel like an object. But a man can walk out in the morning and come

back with another wife without consulting the wife. Imagine a

man's first wife is 45 years, and brings in a 19`year`old girl. How

would a 45`year`old woman compete with a 19`year`old girl in all

matters? In the bedroom. It makes women feel vulnerable. Women will

also look for younger men. Then, you see men in the streets fighting.

Although this controversial law offers some legal protection to

women in polygamous marriages, it endorses a man's right to deceive

his wife or wives over and over again. And, these young Kenyans,

living a modern Nairobi lifestyle, reflect this contradiction. Despite

a global outlook, many are also drawn to traditional African

values. Let me ask, would you ever inbuilt

in a polygamous marriage? `` indulge.

Bad, you don't want that for yourself? `` but.

Meanwhile, in the Rift Valley, life continues relatively unchanged by

the new law. Alice and Mary weren't able to stop her husband marrying

again. What if their daughters and daughters of Kenya's generations to

come? `` and what of. How would this law impact of their lives and their

future marriages? `` impact of their lives.

The weekend is upon us and most of us hope for fine weather. It isn't

looking bad. Summarising the weekend. It will be a tad cooler

compared with the last few days. A dry weekend for most of us, apart

from a couple of showers. It will be a little other cloudy site. This is

the sunshine we had on Friday, it is a little more cloudy in Scotland and

Northern Ireland, however