Episode 7 Now You See It

It is a programme about magic and illusion.

Need more magic in your life?

You've come to the right place as we've got the best tricks

and stunts from around the world.

And jumpsuits.

Tonight, we'll see illusions with a hint of football mania...

HE LAUGHS

..a monkey who couldn't be any brainier. Oh! Where's he going?

And Peter Andre driven to the point of insan-ia.

You won't believe your eyes, your ears or...

SHE SCREECHES ..or whatever's lurking under that bowl.

Michael! Michael!

Hm... I don't think she likes it.

Welcome to Now You See It.

I'm so confused.

You save up enough money...

PIG SQUEALS

That piggy bank was to stop money slipping through his fingers.

Here's the idea. I've got a pen here and also a coin.

The idea is pretty simple, OK?

Take the coin in this hand, tap it with the pen.

It looks as though it disappeared. Cos it's not in the other hand...

Can I just ask, why am I in your wardrobe?

I'll get rid of the coin. I'll put the coin away.

Actually, sorry, I meant the pen, didn't I? No. Yeah.

No, I did mean the coin, sorry. I'll put the coin away. Yeah, OK.

Let's do this again. I'll put the coin away in my pocket.

We don't need it any more. What we do need is a pen.

If I throw the pen up in the air,

like this, it changes to the coin

cos the pen is in my pocket.

HE LAUGHS

-I'm so confused.

-Yeah, can I come out now?

To the mean streets of Slough to see what Ryan Tricks is up to.

Yes, bruv. There's one down there. Look, look, look.

Either he is about to perform a magic trick or for some reason,

he is going to kidnap a parking attendant.

Let's go, let's go, let's go.

All right, let's go.

I finally found a parking ticket.

What we're going to do now is I'm going to push it through the glass

so that kids can't steal it, all right?

Because we all know how kids like to get their kicks

stealing parking tickets(!)

HE GRUNTS Whoa!

Although he has interfered with the ticket

and as we can see, that's a finable offence.

Oh, dear, what are we going to do?

I know, let's just move on and enjoy some animal magic.

Over to Professor Richard Wiseman.

You are going to put it into the hand here

and you're going to blow.

It completely disappears.

Where did it go? Where did it go? Hang on, rewind.

Three factors in this trick to bear

in mind - the magician, the grape

and that monkey.

We won't label the tree,

that would be patronising,

but keep watching the monkey.

You're going to put it into the hand here

-and you are going to blow...

-Now, that's not magic.

That's theft!

-Ryan. How are you doing, Ryan?

-Good.

Andrew Mayne is also causing borderline criminal mischief

as he plays a game of where's wallet.

I want to test how uneasy you are when your wallet maybe isn't

immediately near you.

So, I'm being mugged on camera?

That's what we do.

-You got a wallet? I'll show you.

-All right.

-I won't touch it.

-I want you to place it inside of here.

-OK.

-Place it inside.

That's good. Now, first thing, hold out your hand.

-OK? You can see exactly where it's at, right?

-Mm-hm.

Put your other hand on top. OK? Close down, close down, OK?

You're starting to feel insecure about it cos it's hard to tell

-inside the cup.

-Yeah, yeah.

-You can't see it. You can't see it.

-Mm-hm.

-A little anxiety?

-Yes.

OK, go ahead, turn it over.

-Yup.

-How does that feel?

-Pretty bad.

-Let's find your wallet, all right?

-OK.

-Take a look, third car down.

A lost wallet is always in the last place you'd look.

OK. Whoa!

-In this case, under a car tyre.

-All right.

I don't know how he did that at all.

HE LAUGHS You can easily get it back.

All you have to do is levitate the car.

Wondering how all these amazing tricks are done?

Well, here's one we can show you. It's...

Tonight, alchemy, the art of turning silver tat into gold tat.

-A silver bracelet.

-OK.

Over to Wayne Houchin, who clearly didn't get

the "wear jazzy clothes" memo.

-If I were to turn this into gold...

-That would be amazing.

Check this out. In order to do this, I need some heat.

-I've got a lighter.

-You got one?

Come close. We're going to try this with a lighter.

Now, please don't try this with a lighter yourself.

If your hands are cold, just put on some mittens.

Doesn't that hurt?

It's hurting me watching it. Ouch.

Going to try to absorb some of the heat.

Don't know if the heat's being absorbed,

but the guy-liner certainly makes his eyes look smoky.

If you turn this to gold, you hired.

Look, look, right here.

-Right here too.

-How are you doing this?

-Yo!

Oh, what's happening here?

It's changing colour.

Wow! It's gold! Apart from the ends.

That's incredible.

Sometimes because of the heat transfer, it gets a little warm.

-Can you see it?

-Whoa!

-That is crazy.

-How did he do it?

-Look at that.

-Find out later.

-Good job.

-That's crazy.

Wham's is off duty at Club Tropicana.

HE SCREAMS

Come on, the drinks are free.

Here is marksman Ghee Tell taking aim with a crossbow.

And here is his assistant Diana, clutching her lucky biscuit tin.

I can tell from the outfits that this is either 300 years

in the future or 1989.

Now, Diana is gyrating through a series of the least natural

movements I've ever seen to retrieve a flower.

Most of us love flowers.

Sadly, power-dressing magicians with crossbows don't.

Well, that's one way to do your pruning.

Unsurprisingly, Diana is checking her life insurance policy.

Now, invalid.

Ghee will cut through anything with his crossbow.

When Diana got dressed this morning, those were trousers.

Now, Ben Hanlin is going to wind up officially the nicest man in

the world in tonight's...

-Well, hello.

-And the nicest man in the world is...

Father Christmas. Oh, sorry, Peter Andre.

Peter is here to do a photo shoot for a wedding cake maker,

but he doesn't realise it's all a big set up.

In walk some actors.

-Hello.

-Oh, my God.

-Oh, are you getting married?

-Yeah, tomorrow, yeah.

-Come here, I'm going to take a picture with you.

He's got no idea...

about anything, to be honest, but he seems happy enough.

-Beautiful.

-And the stunt is on.

-It's exactly how...

Are you getting emotional?

-Sorry.

-Calm down.

-It's really nice.

-It's perfect.

Absolutely perfect.

Right, so I'll box it up for you,

so it can take a few minutes and then we'll go and put in the car.

-All right, all right. We'll be back in a minute.

-OK, all right.

Is it all right if I just put my bag here?

Oh, yeah, sorry. Leave it there.

We'll be back in a minute.

Great, see you in a bit. Can I get a few photos next to some of these?

-Is that all right?

-Yeah, mate, honestly whatever you want.

Well, if you stand there and look at that one there.

-Whatever you want.

-Close-up.

We don't have to go close up.

-I'm 41, I'm not 20...

-Shall I go back a bit?

Oh, no.

-Are you serious?

-HE GASPS

That is the worst thing that could have happened.

Apart from a burst of Mysterious Girl, of course.

First, let's get this out of the way,

so she doesn't see it cos she is going to freak.

It's covered in hair, carpet fibre.

I'd still eat it, can I just say?

-It is good.

-I would love some, but you can't eat her cake!

-Well, she can't eat it now. Hold on, is that fixable?

-No.

-What about that? Is that fixable?

-No.

-Are you sure?

-It certainly isn't.

Oh, mate, I've screwed up, man.

Don't worry. Hey, listen, she's a sweet girl,

she's going to understand. Well...

-let's hope she understands.

-I'll tell you what.

Here, sit down.

-You're not going to make me make a cake, are you?

-Well, look, right.

What I'm thinking is that looks like her cake, doesn't it?

-It looks nothing like her cake.

-No, it's four tier, it's white...

It's four tier, but it's nothing like it. You can't do that.

-It looks nothing like the cake.

-So what I'm thinking is that...

That could be her cake.

I mean, just look at it.

That is her cake, I reckon.

I mean, I think that kind of works as a cake.

I think that really works.

I think that is her cake.

Whoa!

Well, what do you think of that, Peter?

You can almost hear the penny trying to drop.

Then, eventually...

Why do I think you look familiar all of a sudden?

I don't really own a cake shop.

-My name is Ben Hanlin.

-You are kidding me.

-I'm a magician.

And you've just been tricked.

God, I was petrified for that girl. Ah! Are you kidding me?

-Oh, Peter, you are too lovely.

-What?!

You are kidding... Listen, forget all that.

How the hell did you do that?

It's magic, innit?

Look at any card you like in the deck. And remember it. Ready?

It was either one or two. Either went for the front one,

the five of spades.

If not, POW!

Wow! Thanks, Miss Direction. First name, Northerly.

Now for some underwater magic from Jasz Vegas.

So shall we say...

No, let's not.

Oh, look, her hair has gone blue.

Is that the chlorine or has somebody had an accident in the pool?

Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, looking on there.

Ah, the rings.

One of them will have her locker key on the end, I imagine.

Extraordinary stuff, this interlocking ring business, Jasz,

but unless you pick up the rubber brick,

you won't get your bronze swimming badge.

Sorry, Hermione who?

And now a couple of tricks to prove that old adage that when it

comes to magic...

IN RUSSIAN ACCENT: "Now take my camera phone,"

says Ilya Larionov to his mate,

as he'll need both his hands to hold his sheet.

Look, there's the sheet. Amazingly clean. That's what I like to see.

Oh, and he's already drawn a crowd...

That man there.

A bit of banter with the crowd - well - man.

Oh, where's Ilya and where is his crowd?

Look, it's the cameraman. So, who's holding the camera?

And now...Ilya is back.

Oh, this is all too complicated for my poor brain.

Some more sheet-based magic now in the even more idyllic

location of a light industrial estate.

You'd have thought they'd have picked a less windy day.

Still, that sheet will dry pretty quickly.

Whoa! It's Dad.

Let's take a look at some more dads in magic.

Perhaps now it's time to say...

No, still not.

Chevy Chase, looking trim for his age there.

Just an ordinary piece of rope from the shed.

Dad always said it would come in useful.

And look, it's really not useful at all!

His long-suffering wife is operating the camera,

hoping he'll eventually repair the sash window.

That's not enough dad for you? Well, here's some more.

It's time for bed and she is not having it.

There's only one way to sort this.

You can keep your Super Nanny. That is some childcare.

Coming up, this man risks everything by opening two

umbrellas indoors.

SHE BELLOWS, SHRIEKS AND LAUGHS We get a chance to hear

all these noises. Trust me, you'd be doing exactly the same

in her position.

-SHE GASPS

-Michael! Michael!

And our big finish returns to the golden age of Saturday night

telly with a topless bald man, squatting in a cardboard box.

You'd be daft to miss it.

But first, the answer you've been desperate to discover for all

of eight and a half minutes.

You may remember that Wayne Houchin took this rather drab-looking

silver chain and turned it into a drab-looking gold chain,

using what looked like residual heat from the palm of his hand.

This gentleman is dumbfounded. He thinks it's crazy.

This is crazy.

But how exactly did they do that?

Crazy.

I wish that I had the power to take silver and really turn it into gold.

But unfortunately, I can't do that.

Our bracelet is actually copper

and we've coated it with zinc, so it looks silver.

And with that in play, we let science do the rest.

You see, it's all down to some GCSE science.

Apply enough heat

to some zinc-coated copper

and the two metals combine to make...

brass.

Shiny and gold like...gold.

But how did Wayne's magic hot hand cause this reaction?

Well, it didn't. The trick here is inside the oil drum.

There's a hot plate set to 400 degrees.

Perfect conditions to make a cheese toasty. Ha!

And to trigger a chemical reaction.

Place the chain on the oil drum and bingo.

Absolutely crazy.

That is still crazy to see.

It's crazy.

Now who is up for a bit of magic with a football?

I know I am.

And it seems Magical Bones has found just the guys to do one with.

I want you guys to think of a sport, OK? Get one in your mind.

You got one in your mind? Don't say it to me. I'm going to use this, OK.

I've just got a...

bag.

Have you got a sport in your mind?

-ALL:

-Yes.

-What sport were you thinking of?

-Bowling.

-Bowling?

-Yeah.

Um...

Let's try.

Amazing, but not the trick I was after with an actual football.

I know who will do one for me. Here's...

I didn't want to do a trick with an

-actual football, that'd be too obvious.

-Rude.

Instead, a football sticker album from the shop.

Not filled up yet cos we just bought it, OK?

Can you hold out your hand for me?

Put your hand on top, just like that.

We'll come back to that in a second.

I've not stuck the stickers in yet. I've got them right here.

You've seen that they are completely legit. Now, Ben, say stop.

-Stop.

-There, cool. Take the sticker. Have a look at it.

Oh, that will be former Scotland and Kilmarnock player Barry Nicholson.

And can you just push it somewhere in the middle?

Yeah, Barry Nicholson always goes midfield.

Can you hold out both of your hands for me?

Perfect. OK. Now we need to start sticking these in.

If we do this one at a time, we're going to be here all day.

So, I'm going to take the book. So, it is...

-empty, yeah?

-Empty.

-Ben, what we are going to do is just, watch.

If I do it like this and just start filling the sticker book up.

-OK.

-Just like that.

-OK.

-Hey, wow!

Which means in your hands, the backs have gone completely blank.

Check them out.

-LAUGHS:

-Agreed.

-They're all gone.

-That is the sticker book completely filled up.

Oh, wait, I've missed one.

-That's Barry Nicholson.

-Barry Nicholson.

Oh, it's Barry Nicholson.

Just check that again to make sure they are...

Oh, wait, is this the player you picked?

-Definitely was.

-Show it to the camera.

-Barry Nicholson.

-Put the sticker in your pocket.

-That's yours to keep.

-Alongside his 27 other Barry Nicholson spares.

Bring it up just like this.

Bring it up in front of your face.

-Concentrate on Barry Nicholson.

-OK.

Say the name Barry Nicholson out loud.

Keep saying it until you hear me say the word stop.

-OK?

-OK. Barry Nicholson, Barry Nicholson, Barry Nicholson...

This reminds me of that horror film, but with Barry Nicholson.

-Barry Nicholson, Barry Nicholson.

-Stop.

HE LAUGHS

Oh, my word! It's the real Barry Nicholson.

The best football magic trick

since Wayne Rooney's hair reappeared.

Thanks, Damien, and thanks, Barry Nicholson.

Now, please can I have a trick with a football?

Oh, thank you.

My word, Ghee Tell now has five crossbows.

DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS

Happily the music suggests nothing bad is going to happen.

DRAMATIC MUSIC CONTINUES

Ghee! Diana was standing behind that.

Next time give her a shout.

Absolutely incredible and the fee from this appearance will keep

them both in hairspray for at least one more week.

One is easily done, two is too few, but three is the magic number.

Especially when it comes to umbrellas.

This man has no umbrella. Look how wet it's been.

You'd have thought his bowler hat would have sorted him,

but that's not the point. It's not magic.

Still, making good use of this newspaper.

Oh, look at that!

Secondly, if Michael McIntyre did magic.

In fact, it's Fukai and his beautiful wife, Kimika.

Where has he been hiding that many umbrellas, though?

You wouldn't want one opening unexpectedly in your trousers.

Finally, the best street theatre production of Mary Poppins

you've ever seen, courtesy of Farid from Germany.

Look, he's off the ground...a bit.

Unfortunately, if the wind picks up,

they'll find him somewhere

near Frankfurt.

The kids look amazed.

But here's the thing, he didn't need her brolly after all.

Yes, throw it away.

And down he comes.

Oh, dear.

Looks like they need more than a spoonful of sugar right now.

Well done, Farid,

but if you want to end your trick with more pizzazz...

..that's how you do it.

Here we go. It's the amazing Michael Carbonaro,

pranking an assistant in a university science research centre.

We're going to get this all cleaned up for tonight

-because I have a class coming in.

-What are we looking at?

You know, there was like a meteor crash in the Mojave Desert

and they picked up pieces from around the crater.

-The crater.

-Mm-hm. And these were around it, so the dust.

-Oh!

-So, they collected some of the dust.

-Wait, you should put gloves on.

-Oh.

-Yeah.

-Oh, so these just happen to be around it when the meteor...?

-Exactly right. Look at this thing.

-Eww! Don't know what...

-What can we call...? Is that?

-Space pod or space seed?

Came from outer space?

You have gloves on, you can kind of feel it. It has a little bit of a...

-A little roughness to it.

-Yeah.

That's pretty interesting.

SHE SCREAMS

That is the worst.

Oh!

-SHE CHUCKLES

-I'm sorry, I'm not laughing,

but I'm laughing.

Wow! Look at that.

That was in the water for, like, a second and it just swelled up.

It's still...it's still solid.

Uh-oh. Oh, it has like a...

What is in there? I see something.

Is it Barry Nicholson?

Look at that!

-SHE GASPS

-Whoa!

It is totally moving.

It's a creature from outer space and it's still alive!

Obviously, it's just a crab, but it's pretty convincingly alien.

-SHRIEKS:

-There's two!

Yikes, yikes, yikes! Ah!

I love the fact that she's terrified, but also filming it.

-Bleugh!

-SHE SCREAMS

IN AMERICAN ACCENT: We're being invaded by alien crabs, LOL.

Oh, my gosh, it's totally, like, moving.

What if they're, like, multiplying into more in there?

-SHE CHUCKLES

-I just don't want to...

Lift the bowl up and I'll scoop them into here.

-SHE SHRIEKS

-Lift, lift, lift.

-SHE GASPS

-What the heck?

-MEOWING

-What the hell is going on?

I have no idea. That... Why are there...? That's like...

They were just crabs, now they're cats.

It, like, assimilated... Look at the book!

SHE GASPS

Michael! Michael!

SHE SIGHS

The book!

They were crabs, now they are cats.

-MEOWING

-They were crabs!

-Yes.

No, nuh-uh.

That's what can happen with a meteor crash like that.

If something comes out of the meteor that's alive

and it touches something else, it can assimilate.

It's called the Carbonaro effect.

I'm a magician.

SHE LAUGHS

I think she's quite relieved.

Ah, must be recycling day.

Oh, no. It's ping-pong.

Or maybe bin-pong.

Well caught. You do realise humans are non-recyclable?

Well, what I've got is my beach towel,

so why not try something with this?

Don't be fooled by the beach towel.

Wolfgang Riebe isn't German, he's from South Africa.

Watch this.

OK, come place her onto the towel here.

There we go.

Take her feet there, Michael. And hold her neck stiff.

That's it, good. Now, I'm just go let go of the towel.

Just relax.

Well, it is a programme about magic and illusion.

Is this magic or is it an illusion?

Well, I hope it's one of them, Wolfgang.

Ross is going to feel very tempted to...

Hey, a glamorous lady with heavy gardening equipment.

It's Angela Funovits.

We're going to have to use a little...

-AUDIENCE CHEERS

-..protection.

ROSS MUMBLES

Don't worry, Ross, you're going to be just fine.

Dayna, we have, behind us, four boxes.

I want you to take Ross behind the curtain

and place him into one of the boxes.

Each one of those boxes has a camera inside.

Our viewers at home will be able to see

a live feed of Ross in his box at all times.

-Dayna, is he in the box?

-Yes.

Perfect. All right, when you are all finished,

I just want you to come around here to my right.

Shandi, we have boxes one through four.

I will be sawing through

-one of them.

-SHE CHUCKLES

-One and three.

-One and three.

And if Ross is in one, I'm sorry.

This isn't just a trick,

it's a handy way to jump the toilet queue at Glastonbury.

SAWING NOISE

Looks like Ross is safe...so far.

Not your regular Alan Titchmarsh Show audience, is it?

Point to someone in the audience I don't know.

Pretty, little boy. Right here, third row.

Pretty boy, number three or number four?

-Which one should I saw through?

-Number three.

Ross, incidentally, is Angela's 58th assistant this year.

Oh, I can't watch.

SAWING NOISE

Phew, still OK, I think.

All right. Dayna, look at me.

But now we are left with just two boxes.

I hope her intuition is correct.

SAWING NOISE

Let's see, was he in box two?

Get out, Ross.

Oh, yes. Thank heavens. 59th time lucky, Angela.

Right, some very male magic now as Yif and Hansen Chien indulge

in a bit of...

You'll be pleased to know

there's no chainsaw action here.

Unless someone goes crazy

with an electric bread knife.

Mm, it's so delicious, they're not quite eating it.

Oh, looks like a bad case of gluten intolerance.

Let's leave them to it.

And travel to Holland.

IN DUTCH ACCENT: Well, I think it's Holland,

something somewhere is giving it away.

Ah, look, two Dutch ladies. Double Dutch.

Oh, those are big holes.

Anyone seen a maniac with a crossbow?

Importantly, the girls check that this is just an ordinary

slice of cheese.

No trap doors or anything.

But why? Well, watch this.

Oh, the holes are vanishing in that Dutch cheese.

Or as the Dutch call it, cheese.

HE SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE

As cheese Magic goes, that was "e-mmental". Emmental.

THEY GIGGLE

It's time now for our big finish.

Back to 1987 with the legendary Hans Moretti and his wife, Helga.

Oh, that's a lovely gold necklace Hans is wearing.

It was silver, but he met a man with an oil drum

on the way to the studio.

Some middle-aged couples spend their time gardening together

or looking at National Trust properties.

Others are Hans and Helga.

Clearly, someone's just placed an online order for Hans,

so into the box he goes.

It's more fun than you think in those distribution warehouses,

isn't it?

And now a hipster and the chairman of the local Rotary Club

are invited out of the audience to stick swords into the box.

Ow! How can Hans survive that?

Phew... It's Hans' hand, handily proving he's still at hand.

Helga has to be careful taking out those swords.

One of them obviously ripped down

the front of that outfit in rehearsal.

And now the swords have been removed and Hans will

no doubt emerge looking exactly as he did before.

Or he'll appear dressed as a clown in full make-up and

with a chicken on his head.

He's even got an umbrella in there.

Eat your hearts out, Farid and Fukai.

Duck, Helga.

Or is it a goose?

Can I just say, that's what I call a big finish.

Impressive stuff. Don't you think, Peter?

Mm, yeah, a bit lost.

Well, there you have it, the end of another great show.

I'm off now for a kick about with Barry Nicholson and

a monkey who keeps running away with the ball.

-Into the hand here...

-Wish me luck.