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Racing on a Budget

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Now, on Top Gear...

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It's all about value.

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Don't act like you're not impressed!

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-Oh, yeah!

-Rutledge finds the car bargain of the year.

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I'm coming for you, Gramps!

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And we race 500 miles up the California coast in cars we bought for 500.

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-Bloodstains?

-Somebody died!

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Welcome to Top Gear. Today, we are all about cheap cars.

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Now, what do you guys think the cheapest you can pay for a running car is?

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AUDIENCE SHOUT NUMBERS

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1,500?

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He said 1,500. You're the king of Craigslist.

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What's the cheapest car you'd buy?

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I bought a bunch for cheap, but they didn't run.

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I mean, I'm talking about a car you would take across the country, like, trust on a road trip.

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-Oh, bare minimum, probably a thousand bucks.

-A thousand bucks?

-Sounds about right.

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Well, we wanted to see how low we could actually go,

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so we decided to have a race.

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500 miles in cars we spent no more than 500 on.

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The cheapest brand-new car

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you can buy in this country is around 11 grand,

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and you can get a reliable used car for about 5,000 bucks.

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But what happens if you have less than that to spend?

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Much less.

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Can you still get a car that works?

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To find out, we were each given 500 to buy a car,

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and told to meet up in Santa Monica, California.

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I used to flip cars in college,

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and I've owned eight that cost less than 500 bucks,

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and I know what you're looking for.

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You want cheap, reliable and simple.

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Enter the Ford Festiva.

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1,800 lbs of honest reliability.

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Now, it's got 227,000 miles on it, but it's got a new engine in it,

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so I think it's ready to go another 200,000 miles.

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It may look like a total piece of crap,

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but it's actually a huge piece of crap.

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-Don't act like you're not impressed.

-Oh, my God!

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-What happened to this side?

-That is not the pretty side.

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That's the 500 side, clearly!

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This is a 190E, 1989, staple of the Mercedes line-up.

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-This is back when they were really sweet.

-I can't believe it.

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And you found yourself a Micro Machine with 12-inch wheels.

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These are pretty different from what we usually choose. What's that say about Adam?

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I think Adam's still going to go for an old piece of crap. Something big and old.

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Better than you can even imagine. That is a taxi!

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Just when you think he couldn't make any worse decisions,

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he goes out and buys a taxi for 500!

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Ah?

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-Ah?

-1994 Ford Crown Victoria. The workhorse.

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Look inside of this thing. Look at it!

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I can't believe you kept the little bacteria sponge

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on the steering wheel, for one.

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Look at the back seat.

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People have had sex in this car, they have thrown up in this car.

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-How does it smell, Rutledge?

-What's the huge stain?

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Look, he's got the nose of a German Shepherd. What is it like in there?

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This car carries humans, humans have fluids, sometimes they get out. No big deal.

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How many miles are on this thing?

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425,000 miles.

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You know how many times around the earth that is?

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No.

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OK, gentlemen. Let's see what we're doing with these hot rods.

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"The true test of your 500 cars is to race them

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"500 miles to Twin Peaks in San Francisco."

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"But first, cars this cheap are unreliable, and sometimes need help.

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"So, to see who chose the best cheap car,

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"you'll race 100 yards across this parking lot...

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-"..pushing your cars."

-Ha-ha-ha!

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-First to the other end wins.

-Oh, this is going to be fun!

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-First one to the black line, right there.

-OK. Who's going to call it?

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-Have you guys looked at the beach here?

-Yeah, it's nice.

-It is...

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Ready, set, go!

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You're already cheating!

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Oh, this is great.

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-Adam, how's it going back there?

-Fine!

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Just going for a little jog, fellas. Don't mind me.

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Adam, you're going to hit me!

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I think you helped me, Adam. Thank you.

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The Festiva roars ahead.

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1,800 lbs.

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Pure awesomeness.

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Hey, hey, look out! Don't...

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-Not cool, man!

-Oh, sorry, I hit you.

-I beat you!

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-I think he's driving it.

-Seems like he's cheating.

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-You won. You happy?

-Yeah.

-It's like "Everybody gets a trophy", so he won.

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-Oh, that's nice(!)

-Good job. We're going 500 miles.

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Get on the road, boys. Let's go. Mount up.

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Follow this winner of a car!

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Yeah(!) Winner.

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'Rutledge may have won the first challenge,

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'but the race to San Francisco had just begun.

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'The first leg of the race would be from Santa Monica to Santa Barbara,

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'then through Santa Cruz to the finish in San Francisco.

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'The car that made it to Twin Peaks first would win.

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'This route required our cars

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'to withstand long stretches of highway,

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'elevation changes and stop-and-go traffic -

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'the worst possible conditions for cheap cars.

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'And Tanner's Mercedes was not off to a good start.'

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ENGINE SPLUTTERS

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Come on. Come on, don't go out this way.

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'I, on the other hand, was loving my ride'.

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There's something great about owning a 500 car.

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You don't have to worry about payments, the insurance is low,

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you don't care about dings or dents, you don't have to worry where you park it,

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you never have to wash it, and if it breaks down,

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that's where you leave it... and call a cab.

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That's kind of ironic.

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Taxi cabs and law enforcement agencies love Crown Vics

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because they're tough and easy to fix.

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LA Police Department even has a frame straightener.

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They go out and mangle these things up, bring them back to headquarters,

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straighten out the frames and send them out again.

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So, how does my survivor drive? I'll be honest with you,

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the suspension isn't tired, it's exhausted.

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There's a several minute delay between steering input

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and actual turning.

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Look at this. I'm still going straight.

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What do you want for 500 bucks?

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And Tanner shows up in that Mercedes,

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he looks like an ambassador for a sad, broke-ass country.

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You got it. You can do it, you can do it. Yes!

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ENGINE STARTS

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'My Mercedes finally came to life, and now I was in last place,

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'but that would be no problem for the Merc.

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'She may not be as pretty as she once was,

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'but at least she wasn't ridiculous, like Rutledge's little toy car.'

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It's funny, if you look at cars throughout history,

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there are a few that are really iconic,

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and they keep being made for years and years afterwards,

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like the original Volkswagen Beetle was made up until

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the late 2000s in Mexico, or the Volkswagen Rabbit,

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the first one, was still being made in South Africa, and other places.

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This car is still being produced in Iran.

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Yep.

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Still being produced.

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The reason this car is going to make it the 500 miles is simple -

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it's the best car here.

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There's not a whole lot to this car,

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but there's not a whole lot that can go wrong.

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Keep gas in it, don't overheat it, change the oil.

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The Ford Festiva.

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'The best thing about my Festiva was that it was beating Tanner's Benz.'

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There are two things you never want to touch

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with your bare hands - the steering wheel in a 500 car,

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and the remote control in a cheap hotel. I'm just saying.

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HORN BLARES

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The advantage of buying a 500 car with leather, or even vinyl,

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is that you can clean it.

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The surface is made to repel bacteria.

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It's leather, it's the skin of a beast.

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-CAR VIBRATES

-OK, that is some serious vibration, right there.

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Let's just hope we can go 500 miles.

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'My Mercedes might not have gotten off to the best start,

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'but for 500, she was doing great,

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'and it didn't take me long to catch up.'

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-Oh, whoa.

-How are those bumps, Rutledge?

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Totally fine, not checking my fillings right now at all.

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'We were surrounded by gorgeous scenery,

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'driving on one of the most beautiful stretches of road in the world.

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'Perfect for luxurious sports cars - and there WE were!'

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There's one thing I have plenty of in here, it's dog hair!

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Oh, my God, that's gross.

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It's not much to look at, and it's obviously in some real disrepair.

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The AC, not even remotely cold. It doesn't go very fast.

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There's stains all over the seats and the floor.

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The steering wheel smells terrible.

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'But, as bad as my car was, it was still better than the other cars.'

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It doesn't have nearly a half a million miles on it,

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that were driven by cabbies and police officers.

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Ow!

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It hasn't been waiting to be crushed in a junkyard,

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like Tanner's Mercedes.

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-CAR VIBRATES

-Oh, my gosh.

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It's a perfect cherry of a Ford Festiva.

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'I was living my biggest nightmare - gorgeous winding roads ahead of me,

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'but stuck for miles in a no-passing zone behind the Crown Vic

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'and Rutledge's little toy. Both going way under the speed limit.

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'As soon as I saw an opening to pass them, I took it.'

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All right, finally getting to open the Mercedes up. 60, 65, 70.

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'Oh, you know you're jealous!' Yeah! It's fast.

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'Battered, bruised and wheezy as the Merc was,

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'it still had some power left, and I took the lead,

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'and won the first leg of the race to Santa Barbara.'

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-What are we doing here?

-Well, we've got these, and this.

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OK, looks uncomfortable.

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"A cheap car is only good as long as you can hold onto it.

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"To see which of you chose the most secure vehicle,

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"you will now attempt to break into each other's cars.

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-"Whoever can break in first wins."

-I'll take the Festiva.

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I'll take the taxi.

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-That gives me that.

-All right, here we go.

-Start right now?

-Yeah.

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You know how I know I'm going to win? Nobody would feel the need

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to design any kind of anti-theft device for this.

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'Rutledge's car would be no problem to break into.

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'It's pretty much made completely out of plastic.

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'The taxi looks a bit tougher, but Adam would have the hardest time

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with my German engineered Mercedes.'

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-I've got to get this down in there.

-There it is. Oh, I pushed it down.

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-Oh, I'm so close.

-Come on. Come on, get in there.

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Oh, oh, I've got movement.

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And then at some point you just get frustrated,

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and you just sort of shake it around.

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Enough of this.

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Look at that, look at that, come on.

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Breaking into a car, with a coat hanger...

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-Adam, I'm about to unlock the chamber of death, here.

-Yeah.

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-Are you really that close?

-Yes, I got the pin wiggling.

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-Adam! What!

-What's wrong with you?

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-I win.

-That doesn't seem fair at all.

-No way, that doesn't count.

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What, are you playing for second place? Come on, let's go.

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-Come on, come on.

-Great, you got second place. Wonderful.

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That's not second place, you broke the window on my car.

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-Yeah, I win, let's go.

-He cheated.

-Are you kidding me?

-What?

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-That does not count.

-You can't just break the window.

-Course it counts. I got in. It said we had to get in.

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Such a New Yorker.

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How could you do that to my car?

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Look, a challenge is a challenge, I got into the car, I win.

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How is it you have moved from destroying your own cars to

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now destroying other people's cars?

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I was given a challenge, and I chose a method, and it worked.

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Like when you jumped the Coupe de Ville, you chose to bend it into a banana.

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I chose to jump it. The Caddie bent itself when it landed.

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You killed it.

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It turns out you're not the only one who's into killing off old Caddies...

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..GM is, too.

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'In 1999, with the brand dying off - like most of its buyers -

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'Cadillac announced the new "art and science" philosophy.

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'A plan to get back to their roots, with cutting-edge design

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'and high-end technology.

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'Now, they didn't even have a car for it yet, just an attitude,'

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but it was a good attitude.

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'And this new approach puts Cadillac performance right up there

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'with exotics like Ferrari.

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'So, could a 60,000 Cadillac beat a 200,000 Ferrari in a drag race?

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'There's only one way to find out.

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'But, first, I would need to check out Cadillac's new beast.'

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Now, this is a Cadillac you'd want to drive.

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Old men riding around with your blinker on for miles, watch out.

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I'm coming for you, gramps.

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This is a 2011 Cadillac CTS-V.

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It's got a Corvette engine in it, but not just any Corvette,

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the daddy of them all - the ZR1.

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It's got 556 supercharged horsepower under the hood.

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It will do 0-60 in four seconds.

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It's got a top speed of 175 mph.

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How did this happen? How did Cadillac become cool again?

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Cadillac's history is a lot like John Travolta's -

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it was really cool at first, and then all of a sudden,

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it became seriously uncool.

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And then, bang, it was cool again.

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I mean, this car, this is Cadillac's Pulp Fiction.

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So, they took out a sheet of paper, and to me

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it looks like they didn't draw anything on it, they just folded it.

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There's curves, but they're all caught on the sharp edges and creases.

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This new look, this is what sets Cadillac apart, the CTS,

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the XLR, even the Escalade SUV.

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And you know what? It looks fantastic.

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'And it wasn't all design. The new Cadillacs would have

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'something else to set them apart - performance.'

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Oh, yeah.

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And it's got a manual six speed gearbox, standard.

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You don't normally associate Cadillac with manual transmission,

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but in this one, it makes perfect sense.

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You can smoke the tires at 100 mph.

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This is American bad ass, wrapped in Hugo Boss,

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it's like John Wayne in a Tommy Hilfiger sweater.

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Wow, you shouldn't be able to do this in a Cadillac!

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There are some things about this car that I really like.

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When you first get in the car, you notice the beautiful interior.

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There's suede everywhere, there's nice leather stitching,

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and then you look up -

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and see the same headliner that's in a Chevy truck.

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Why does GM do that?

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They get so close to making a perfect car,

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and then at the last minute, "Oh, just whatever.

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"I don't care, no one's going to look up."

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And one thing I don't like in here is the door handles on the CTS-V.

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To get out, it's a strange video game door popper,

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just like they have on the Corvette, and I don't like them there either!

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What's wrong, they call it a door handle? HANDLE.

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Not door button.

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'But it's remarkable that you can get this much car for just 60,000,

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'and it gets even better.

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'For 2011, the CTS-V is available in three body styles,

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'all with manual transmission,

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'and monster supercharged engine.

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'The Sudan will put you in the same league

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'as the BMW M5 or the Mercedes E63 AMG.

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'And the CTS-V wagon?

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'Well, this just might be the world's first wagon supercar.'

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The wagon? The fastest production wagon in the universe!

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Wow, this car is amazing!

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If it's not obvious by now, I am a wagon man.

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There something about a wagon, to me,

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that screams, "I'm ready for anything."

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And this is the perfect kind of wagon that I'd want.

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Can you imagine going shopping in a wagon with over 500 horsepower?

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You could do a burnout all the way home from the mall,

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while your kids are in the back screaming. That's awesome.

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'Cadillac has developed an incredible new line of high-performance vehicles.

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'I can understand why some, mainly old, people,

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'might think the CTS-Vs are too much of a departure from the old Caddies,

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'but I think they can be convinced.'

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Driving Miss Ferrara. Can I get your bags for you, sir?

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-No problem, I have people for that.

-What in the world is this?

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This is a statement, my friend.

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1957 Eldorado Biarritz, that's when a Cadillac was a Cadillac.

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No way. This is the new Cadillac. The 2011 CTS-V.

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-You can get a two-door, a four-door, or a wagon.

-Backup, backup. Wagon.

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-Oh, yeah.

-How was the soccer game?

-It's amazing.

-Really?

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This says, "you've arrived,"

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that says, "you've arrived from summer camp with the kids."

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-What are you doing?

-They are the new Cadillac.

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OK, I'll be honest with you. I been burned by Caddies before.

0:20:010:20:04

The last great Caddy for me was the '76 Coupe de Ville.

0:20:040:20:07

After that, Caddies got smaller, and just went right down the toilet.

0:20:070:20:11

'Adam wasn't convinced.

0:20:110:20:13

'So, I needed to resort to a simple demonstration,

0:20:130:20:17

'that even he might understand - a drag race.

0:20:170:20:20

'The 200,000 Ferrari California against the CTS-V...

0:20:200:20:24

'..Wagon.

0:20:240:20:26

'An American grocery-getter versus the world's most famous

0:20:260:20:30

'Italian performance brand.'

0:20:300:20:32

The Ferrari California isn't the fastest Ferrari

0:20:330:20:36

but it does zero to 60 in 3.8 seconds,

0:20:360:20:39

top speed of 193, let's do it.

0:20:390:20:41

OK, here we go. Three, two, one, go.

0:20:410:20:46

Oh, here we go.

0:20:490:20:51

Oh!

0:20:520:20:53

Oh-oh-oh-oh, man.

0:20:550:20:56

This CTS-V Wagon is smoking him.

0:20:560:21:00

Oh, look at that, that got him. Woo.

0:21:030:21:05

Holy crap.

0:21:050:21:07

The Wagon just beat a Ferrari. Which is a stupid fast car.

0:21:080:21:13

That means this is faster than stupid fast. This is F-you fast.

0:21:130:21:17

Driving those Cadillacs was a blast.

0:21:200:21:22

I bet, for once, you're jealous.

0:21:220:21:24

I was. That looked like a lot of fun.

0:21:240:21:26

But, really, Cadillac, an old-man brand

0:21:260:21:29

now saying they rival the fastest cars on the planet?

0:21:290:21:32

I'm not buying it.

0:21:320:21:33

See, that's it exactly why we gave the Coupe

0:21:330:21:35

and the Wagon to our anonymous racing driver The Stig

0:21:350:21:38

to put around our test track and see how fast they really are.

0:21:380:21:42

Now, The Stig drove the CTS-V Coupe earlier

0:21:420:21:45

and we'll show you that time in a minute.

0:21:450:21:47

But Rutledge insisted on showing The Stig driving the Wagon. Shocking.

0:21:470:21:51

Let's see how The Stig does.

0:21:520:21:54

Well, Rutledge may worship this as the ultimate Wagon

0:21:550:21:58

but at the hands of The Stig,

0:21:580:22:00

I think we'll see some chinks in the armour.

0:22:000:22:03

Strangely, very quick coming round the first turn

0:22:030:22:06

into the chicane.

0:22:060:22:07

I was expecting to see quite a bit more body roll.

0:22:070:22:11

Now, this is the true test,

0:22:120:22:13

out of the teardrop,

0:22:130:22:15

slowest section of the track, will it have wheels spin

0:22:150:22:18

or be efficiently putting the power to the ground?

0:22:180:22:21

I would say that is a no.

0:22:210:22:24

Wheels are blazing on the way out of the teardrop, but building

0:22:240:22:27

huge speed as it comes around the fastest, back straightaway.

0:22:270:22:30

Over 120 miles an hour we see on the speedometer. Very fast by the tyres.

0:22:340:22:38

Wow, amazing - beautiful little drift

0:22:420:22:46

as the car just seems to absorb the bumps mid-drift.

0:22:460:22:50

I'm really impressed with the way the suspension is working.

0:22:500:22:53

It's just getting around the track. It may not be the most sophisticated

0:22:550:22:58

but, as it comes through the last corner,

0:22:580:23:01

a bit of drift and across the line.

0:23:010:23:02

-Wow.

-That is the fastest wagon I have ever seen.

0:23:040:23:06

What do you guys think? Wagon faster than the Coupe?

0:23:060:23:09

-Yes.

-No!

-Coupe faster?

-Yeah!

-Coupe's faster than the wagon?

-Yeah.

0:23:090:23:13

You'd think the Coupe has got to be faster than the Wagon.

0:23:130:23:16

The Coupe did it in a time of 1:27.4.

0:23:160:23:21

-That puts it ahead of a Mercedes SLS AMG.

-Wow.

0:23:210:23:25

-That's a quarter-million dollar car right there.

-Wow.

0:23:250:23:28

Their supercar just got beat by an American car.

0:23:280:23:31

-That can't be right.

-Wow.

-Really?

-That feels good.

0:23:310:23:34

LAUGHTER

0:23:340:23:36

Now, if the Wagon was just even a second or two slower,

0:23:360:23:39

it still would be in respectable territory.

0:23:390:23:42

You've got the Lotus Evora down here, you've got the V12 Vantage.

0:23:420:23:45

The Wagon did it in a time of 1:27.2.

0:23:450:23:51

-Two tenths faster - faster! Faster than the Coupe.

-Unbelievable.

0:23:530:24:00

That is unreal, especially for the money.

0:24:000:24:03

-I mean, these are both right around 60 grand. Wow.

-Incredible.

0:24:030:24:06

And that's only slightly better value than our 500 cars.

0:24:060:24:10

'So far, our junkie jalopies had raced hundreds of miles

0:24:160:24:21

'up the California coast towards San Francisco.

0:24:210:24:23

'My Festiva was doing great.

0:24:250:24:28

'So, I hammered down and tried to pull ahead.'

0:24:280:24:30

Gas it, gas it!

0:24:300:24:31

Ooh, ooh.

0:24:320:24:35

My car smells like a pack of burning matches.

0:24:370:24:40

'Apparently, I didn't have the power I needed to make my move.

0:24:410:24:44

-'So, Adam was now in front.'

-I'm flying along at 65 miles an hour.

0:24:440:24:50

As long as I don't turn, I'm fine.

0:24:500:24:53

If Adam's life insurance carrier knew he was driving a retired taxi

0:24:530:24:56

with 400,000 miles on it, they would drop him like a bad habit.

0:24:560:25:01

'Tanner was going to have to get used to seeing my tail-lights.

0:25:010:25:04

'I was the first to arrive at our next stop in Santa Cruz...

0:25:040:25:08

'..where we received some unwelcome information about our cars.'

0:25:100:25:14

All right, fellas, pay attention.

0:25:140:25:16

"Buying cheap cars means buying a piece of history.

0:25:160:25:18

"Often one you would rather not sit in.

0:25:180:25:21

"Your cars were subject to forensic analysis."

0:25:210:25:23

-Really?

-"Least contaminated car wins."

0:25:230:25:27

-Is that what these envelopes are?

-Must be.

-I think so.

-Oh, no.

0:25:270:25:31

I'll go first. I have total confidence in the Festiva.

0:25:340:25:37

Here we go.

0:25:370:25:39

"Hair of non-human origin,

0:25:390:25:42

"variable length and colour,

0:25:420:25:44

"found in large quantities.

0:25:440:25:46

"Visible under ultraviolet light,

0:25:460:25:49

"overlapping stain fields of organic origin,

0:25:490:25:53

"concentrations of ammonia

0:25:530:25:54

"and fructose consistent with urine and seminal fluid".

0:25:540:25:57

Wait, stain FIELDS?

0:25:570:25:59

There is dog breeding that goes on in that Festiva!

0:25:590:26:02

Fields of animal fluids in the back of that?

0:26:020:26:05

"Traces of faecal matter". Oh, that's so gross!

0:26:050:26:08

Well, could be worse.

0:26:080:26:10

Yeah, there could be human AND dog fluids in there.

0:26:100:26:14

Oh, like you should talk(!) What's yours say?

0:26:140:26:16

OK. "Present in both left and right rear footwells

0:26:160:26:19

"are dispersed areas of dried substance with concentrations of HCO,

0:26:190:26:23

"hydrochloric acid,

0:26:230:26:25

"consistent with vomitus".

0:26:250:26:27

Stomach acid.

0:26:270:26:30

"UV analysis of the rear bench seat reveals bloodstains

0:26:300:26:33

"in the underlying foam, covering approximately

0:26:330:26:36

"one third of the seating area".

0:26:360:26:38

-One THIRD?!

-You're bleeding to death!

0:26:380:26:41

Somebody could have died.

0:26:410:26:42

Someone could have had a baby in there. You don't know.

0:26:420:26:46

-Oh my gosh!

-If it's down in the foam, it got hosed!

0:26:460:26:48

Which means it's not on the cover any more, so it's fine.

0:26:480:26:53

All right, what have you got?

0:26:530:26:54

Mine's going to be boring.

0:26:540:26:56

This car's clean.

0:26:560:26:57

Yeah, it looks so tidy(!)

0:26:570:26:59

There's a few more sentences here than I would have expected, actually.

0:26:590:27:03

"Moderate quantities of nasal mucosa

0:27:030:27:05

"found on the steering wheel."

0:27:050:27:08

Snot!

0:27:080:27:09

"Protein-rich..."

0:27:090:27:10

Anything that starts with "protein-rich",

0:27:100:27:13

I'm telling you is bad!

0:27:130:27:14

"Protein-rich substance found

0:27:140:27:17

"in crevices of driver seat cushion.

0:27:170:27:19

"High concentration of dead skin cells,

0:27:190:27:21

-"and presence of staphylococcus bacteria."

-Oh, no way!

0:27:210:27:27

Rear car has a Staph infection.

0:27:270:27:30

Drink orange juice, knock that out.

0:27:300:27:31

A Staph infection on the steering wheel!

0:27:310:27:34

I mean, I'm not like a hypochondriac...

0:27:340:27:36

You actually are!

0:27:360:27:37

-That is gross.

-Clearly, you lose.

0:27:370:27:39

-How did it get on the steering wheel?

-You'll probably die!

0:27:390:27:42

Look, I win.

0:27:420:27:44

-You do not win!

-Of course I win!

-You're soaked in blood!

0:27:440:27:47

Blood and puke, what do you expect?

0:27:470:27:49

We've got two words,

0:27:490:27:51

"boundary layer".

0:27:510:27:52

-That's what's happening now.

-Really?

0:27:520:27:55

-Yeah.

-All right.

0:27:550:27:56

-20 minutes, we meet back here...

-Oh, my gosh!

0:27:560:27:59

..Make whatever "boundary layers" you want,

0:27:590:28:01

and then head up to San Francisco, all right?

0:28:010:28:03

All right, I'm starting to feel a little better.

0:28:030:28:06

Rut, you might want to get a flea collar!

0:28:060:28:08

-It's just TRACES of faecal matter.

-Oh, that's much better(!)

0:28:080:28:11

I thought there was a problem(!)

0:28:110:28:14

Now it's time for Big Star, Small Car,

0:28:140:28:16

where we put celebrities in our Suzuki SX4,

0:28:160:28:18

and send them round the test track to see who's got the fastest time.

0:28:180:28:21

Our celebrity today is Maroon 5's Adam Levine.

0:28:210:28:25

APPLAUSE

0:28:250:28:26

HE HOWLS

0:28:260:28:28

-Welcome, man!

-How's it going, man?

-We're so excited you could be here!

0:28:280:28:31

I am very excited to be here.

0:28:310:28:33

We've had musicians do well here before.

0:28:330:28:35

Do you feel like you're going to the top of the board?

0:28:350:28:38

Do you think first or last?

0:28:380:28:40

LAUGHTER

0:28:400:28:42

Let's get you out there, man.

0:28:420:28:43

-Let's go for it. Hop on in.

-Let's do it.

-Good luck.

0:28:430:28:46

We're going to clear the track. We'll meet you back at the hangar.

0:28:460:28:49

Go get them!

0:28:490:28:51

-Let's go, you guys!

-CHEERING

0:28:510:28:53

look at that determination! Adam's off to a good start.

0:28:540:28:57

Catch in second.

0:28:590:29:00

Come on!

0:29:000:29:02

What is up with this ..., man?

0:29:020:29:04

Coming up to turn one. Getting a little intense.

0:29:040:29:07

This is going to be all sound bites of me just cursing

0:29:070:29:10

cos I'm so pissed off! Damn it, dude!

0:29:100:29:12

So annoying!

0:29:140:29:16

It's easy to get flustered out there.

0:29:160:29:19

Dude, dude!

0:29:210:29:22

-BLEEP

-dude!

0:29:240:29:25

Suzuki does that to a lot of people.

0:29:250:29:27

All right, he's got some good speed out on the back stretch.

0:29:280:29:31

Looks good right there, nice and smooth.

0:29:330:29:35

A good speed, little understeer.

0:29:360:29:38

Does third gear exist?

0:29:380:29:40

I think it does. It's in between second and fourth.

0:29:400:29:43

Here it is, last turn...

0:29:430:29:45

and Adam is across the line.

0:29:450:29:46

BLEEP!

0:29:460:29:47

-And he's still smiling.

-APPLAUSE

0:29:470:29:50

Come on up!

0:29:520:29:54

Come on up!

0:29:540:29:55

Adam Levine, everybody!

0:29:570:29:59

CHEERING

0:29:590:30:01

How you doing, man? Nice work out there!

0:30:010:30:03

-You have a good time?

-I had a lot of fun.

0:30:060:30:08

Just hope that I'm not last!

0:30:080:30:11

Let's talk.

0:30:110:30:12

You're a busy man, one of the judges on The Voice, great show.

0:30:120:30:15

APPLAUSE

0:30:150:30:18

You're in a HUGELY popular band, Maroon 5.

0:30:180:30:20

I want to know, how did you get into cars?

0:30:200:30:22

I've always enjoyed driving, you know.

0:30:220:30:25

I was born and raised in Los Angeles.

0:30:250:30:27

It's always a huge part of California culture, I think,

0:30:270:30:30

driving and enjoying your car.

0:30:300:30:32

It's kind of your sanctuary, it's your space, and I just love it.

0:30:320:30:35

-East Coast people don't understand...

-LAUGHTER

0:30:350:30:39

They don't! They're like, "oh, subway, taxi..."

0:30:390:30:42

Your first car was what?

0:30:430:30:45

My first car was a 1971 Mach 1, Mustang Mach 1.

0:30:450:30:48

A Mach 1!

0:30:480:30:49

APPLAUSE

0:30:490:30:51

I didn't know anything - and still don't - about cars.

0:30:550:30:57

I thought it was a beautiful thing and loved it. I started getting into it. It snowballed out of control.

0:30:570:31:02

And now, here I am, racing Suzukis.

0:31:020:31:05

It's a natural progression, Mach 1 to Suzuki.

0:31:050:31:08

Did your car path help you with the ladies?

0:31:080:31:10

Not originally.

0:31:100:31:12

Not when I was driving my mum's...

0:31:120:31:15

awesome, bright red Jeep Cherokee to school.

0:31:150:31:17

-That didn't get me any dates with the ladies.

-Did not!

0:31:170:31:21

But I loved that car. That car's bad ass!

0:31:210:31:23

The coolest car I've owned, my dad gave me his.

0:31:230:31:25

-He had like an 86 Jimmy, JMC Jimmy.

-Yeah.

0:31:250:31:28

It was black, and it had a red stripe on it.

0:31:280:31:31

Still the coolest car to this day.

0:31:310:31:33

-It just had a history to it.

-Sure.

0:31:330:31:35

And what was that beautiful car you drove in this morning?

0:31:350:31:38

-That was an Aston Martin, that was a DB9.

-A DB9!

0:31:380:31:41

APPLAUSE

0:31:410:31:42

Yeah!

0:31:420:31:43

That's advanced!

0:31:430:31:45

I love that car, man.

0:31:450:31:47

My buddies and I always take that car out to Vegas so we can drive quickly,

0:31:470:31:52

and I've been pulled over many, many times in that car!

0:31:520:31:55

I've been pulled over, actually, about six times in that car.

0:31:550:31:58

I've never gotten a ticket cos...

0:32:000:32:02

-How'd you do that?

-This is so stupid to do it on television. Uh...

0:32:020:32:06

Cos I got pulled over once on the way to Vegas.

0:32:060:32:09

I was probably going 95 miles an hour and in that car,

0:32:090:32:11

it just feels you're getting started, but clearly to...

0:32:110:32:14

There are laws against speeding.

0:32:140:32:16

So this cop pulled me over and he looked at me for a minute -

0:32:160:32:19

this is on the way to Vegas - he looked at me for a bit,

0:32:190:32:21

he goes, "Be right back." He goes to his car, comes back.

0:32:210:32:24

I'm thinking, "Great, I'm going to jail.

0:32:240:32:26

"Reckless driving, I'm dead. He's taking my car." I'm freaking out.

0:32:260:32:29

He just looked at me and goes, "I should arrest you,

0:32:290:32:32

"but my wife's a big fan, so..."

0:32:320:32:34

LAUGHTER

0:32:340:32:35

She'll kill me if I arrest you.

0:32:350:32:37

I was like, "Thank God for your wife, sir."

0:32:370:32:40

-LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

-That is awesome!

0:32:400:32:42

So, Adam, how d'you think you did?

0:32:430:32:45

All right. Here's where I make excuses and bitch and moan about it

0:32:450:32:49

-but I'm going to do it, cos I think I should.

-Sure.

0:32:490:32:51

I didn't have the full amount of time.

0:32:510:32:53

-"I didn't have the total amount of time!"

-I didn't!

0:32:530:32:56

-"I'm just... I'm very busy."

-I will stab you!

0:32:560:32:58

Bring it! Bring it! You went out there in the Suzuki.

0:32:580:33:01

-You felt good, though, right?

-I started feeling good.

0:33:010:33:05

I got some lessons and started learning

0:33:050:33:07

and just when I started getting comfortable, I have to leave.

0:33:070:33:11

You give me 30 minutes, I'll give you number one.

0:33:110:33:14

-AUDIENCE:

-Oooh!

0:33:140:33:16

Wow! You guys want to see his time?

0:33:160:33:18

-AUDIENCE:

-Yeah!

-All right.

0:33:180:33:20

APPLAUSE

0:33:200:33:21

Here we go.

0:33:210:33:23

Adam Levine, you did it...

0:33:230:33:25

..in 1...

0:33:250:33:27

.49.2.

0:33:270:33:29

-AUDIENCE:

-Oh!

0:33:290:33:31

Boo!

0:33:310:33:32

Right there. You're between two Pawn Stars.

0:33:320:33:36

-Oh, look at... Disappointment!

-Well, I mean...

0:33:370:33:40

I'm very proud of my very quick progress,

0:33:400:33:43

however, I am disappointed, cos I swear to you,

0:33:430:33:47

every one I've shaven whole seconds off,

0:33:470:33:49

so I could have gotten down there, man.

0:33:490:33:51

-There's no doubt in my mind.

-I agree.

0:33:510:33:53

-Right here, man!

-I agree.

-Right here!

-It's all there!

0:33:530:33:56

That's all you needed, right?

0:33:560:33:58

-Don't you play that

-BLEEP

-violin for me!

0:33:580:34:00

-RUTLEDGE LAUGHS

-You guys, let's give Adam a hand. Come on!

0:34:000:34:05

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:34:050:34:07

-Last question for you.

-Yeah?

-Have you ever bought a car for 500 bucks?

0:34:070:34:12

-I've never paid 500 for a car.

-Yeah. And we're about to see why that's a good thing.

0:34:120:34:16

We're getting back to our 500 challenge.

0:34:160:34:18

'We'd just received the disgusting results of a forensic test

0:34:220:34:26

'on our cars.'

0:34:260:34:27

-Overlapping stain fields...

-Vomitus...

-Nasal mucosa...

0:34:270:34:31

-Bloodstains...

-Staphylococcus bacteria...

0:34:310:34:34

Urine and seminal fluid.

0:34:340:34:36

'So we decided to protect ourselves with whatever we could find.'

0:34:360:34:40

Oh! Hey!

0:34:420:34:44

Hey?! You look ridiculous! What is that?

0:34:440:34:47

It's a protective suit. We're at the beach. It's the best I could find, man.

0:34:470:34:51

That's the dumbest thing I've ever seen.

0:34:510:34:53

I was wrong.

0:34:530:34:55

Morons.

0:34:560:34:59

-Let's do this.

-All right!

0:35:000:35:02

Let's go.

0:35:020:35:04

May not have thought this all the way through.

0:35:040:35:08

'We only had 73 miles to go to complete our 500-mile journey

0:35:090:35:14

'in our 500 cars, which had just been proven to be

0:35:140:35:17

'rolling bio-hazards.'

0:35:170:35:20

To be honest, the forensic report didn't tell me anything I didn't already know.

0:35:200:35:24

There's blood and puke in a cab. You come to expect that.

0:35:240:35:27

So I bought the gloves so I don't have to touch anything.

0:35:270:35:30

I have the traditional beaded cabbie seat,

0:35:300:35:33

so I don't have to sit actually on the germ-infected...velour.

0:35:330:35:38

And, er... Ah!

0:35:380:35:40

Incense. To get rid of that kind of smell.

0:35:400:35:43

There we go.

0:35:450:35:47

After getting that report,

0:35:470:35:50

I really feel like I came up with a great solution.

0:35:500:35:53

I mean, I needed a barrier between me and all the nastiness and...

0:35:530:35:57

this vinyl seems to be doing the trick.

0:35:570:35:59

I'm noticing my peripheral is slightly distorted

0:35:590:36:03

with this costume.

0:36:030:36:05

As if you ever had peripheral vision!

0:36:060:36:09

Ha!

0:36:090:36:11

You sound awesome!

0:36:110:36:12

I can't help but feel incredibly drowsy in this mask.

0:36:130:36:17

I'm just going to say that.

0:36:170:36:19

Ha-ha-ha!

0:36:190:36:20

I'm totally falling asleep.

0:36:200:36:22

But I did feel quite a bit better, with the boundary layer.

0:36:260:36:28

The rubber gloves are probably the key,

0:36:280:36:31

because the hands are going to be...

0:36:310:36:34

scratching itches on the nose, rubbing the eyes, things like that.

0:36:340:36:38

As long as you get that boundary layer.

0:36:380:36:40

In fact, everybody should carry a boundary layer in their car.

0:36:400:36:43

Adam, which would you take?

0:36:450:36:47

A bath of pus and snot, or of blood and vomit?

0:36:470:36:50

Is it my pus and snot and my blood and vomit?

0:36:500:36:53

'Random people.'

0:36:530:36:55

Sick people or healthy people?

0:36:550:36:58

'Taxicab drivers'

0:36:580:37:00

and patrons of said taxi.

0:37:000:37:03

I'll take drunk vomit.

0:37:030:37:06

Do you guys ever listen to what you're saying?

0:37:060:37:10

Go on, baby, third gear! There it is!

0:37:170:37:21

How are you doing on power there, Rut?

0:37:210:37:23

Are you floored right now, going downhill 68 miles-an-hour?

0:37:230:37:28

Come on, Rut! Pick it up!

0:37:280:37:30

Power!

0:37:330:37:35

Go!

0:37:360:37:38

'Hey, Rut, your car is shedding!'

0:37:380:37:40

Sure, you might be disgusting to ride in,

0:37:430:37:45

and you're not much to look at, Festiva, but, damn it,

0:37:450:37:48

you're going to make it 500 miles!

0:37:480:37:51

'That is, as long as I didn't hit traffic.'

0:37:510:37:54

Oh, boy.

0:37:570:37:58

-This is going to get hairy as

-BLEEP.

0:38:000:38:02

Aw, something's burning on this thing.

0:38:040:38:07

It's starting to stall every time I stop.

0:38:140:38:17

I don't know if it's because it's gotten so warm?

0:38:170:38:20

The gauge doesn't say that it's warm but I can smell that it's warm.

0:38:200:38:25

Uh, airport, please.

0:38:250:38:26

Oh, oh. No way. Somebody just climbed in Adam's!

0:38:260:38:30

Uh, I'm not working.

0:38:300:38:32

Did that guy just try and get in your car as a taxi?

0:38:350:38:38

Yeah.

0:38:380:38:39

Does he know what he just sat in?

0:38:390:38:42

I don't think so, although he does appear to be scratching.

0:38:420:38:45

Ah, ha-ha.

0:38:450:38:46

I could've made 45 bucks taking him to the airport.

0:38:460:38:50

I should have taken him.

0:38:500:38:52

'The deeper we got into the city,

0:38:520:38:55

'the more my Festiva began to struggle.'

0:38:550:38:57

So, my clutch is going, I've got valves tapping

0:38:570:39:01

and now my blinkers don't work.

0:39:010:39:04

HORN BEEPS REPEATEDLY

0:39:040:39:05

As you can probably tell, my horn won't stop honking.

0:39:050:39:08

Seriously, Rut, come on, enough with the horn.

0:39:080:39:12

It's not me, it's stuck!

0:39:120:39:14

'Rut's horn was broken, so we decided to help him fix it.'

0:39:140:39:18

Adam, you want to play Festiva tennis?

0:39:180:39:20

Please, no.

0:39:200:39:22

-Yeah, OK.

-Oh,

-BLEEP.

0:39:220:39:24

Come on!

0:39:240:39:26

Your shot.

0:39:260:39:27

Service!

0:39:270:39:29

Oh, ow!

0:39:290:39:30

-BLEEP,

-I hate you guys.

0:39:330:39:35

Going for the volley.

0:39:350:39:38

HE LAUGHS

0:39:380:39:39

Come on!

0:39:390:39:41

Oh, green light, green light.

0:39:410:39:45

I hate you both...

0:39:450:39:46

so much right now.

0:39:460:39:48

Hey.

0:39:480:39:50

I love your town.

0:39:500:39:52

HORN CONTINUES BEEPING

0:39:520:39:54

Yeah, I think my clutch just went.

0:39:560:40:00

You guys?

0:40:000:40:02

You're kidding?

0:40:050:40:07

See you later, alligator!

0:40:090:40:12

Son of a bitch!

0:40:120:40:13

Really? Come on!

0:40:150:40:18

TRAM HORN TOOTS

0:40:180:40:20

It's only 1,600 lb!

0:40:210:40:23

Remember the big victory dance when he won the push race?

0:40:240:40:28

Now he can do it uphill in an alligator suit.

0:40:280:40:30

HE LAUGHS

0:40:300:40:32

I lost my tail, let me just get that.

0:40:320:40:34

OK. OK.

0:40:360:40:39

All right, we've got some steep hills here.

0:40:390:40:42

-We better be getting to Twin Peaks soon.

-Hold on, baby.

0:40:420:40:45

Come on. We're almost there.

0:40:450:40:46

'The race was down to me and Tanner.

0:40:460:40:49

'He may be a professional driver, but my car had more power,

0:40:490:40:53

'and I was riding his tail like a real taxi driver.'

0:40:530:40:55

Downshift, baby, come on.

0:40:570:40:59

Oh, yeah, feel the power, feel the power.

0:40:590:41:01

Come on, come on.

0:41:030:41:05

Come on, come on, come on.

0:41:050:41:07

Almost there. Done, done, done!

0:41:080:41:11

No, no, no, no, keep going.

0:41:130:41:16

Help! No! Come on! Go, go, go, go, go.

0:41:160:41:19

Hold on.

0:41:220:41:23

Oh, "My Mercedes is the taxi of the world. This is German engineering."

0:41:250:41:30

And that Festiva, a rolling pet shop, burns out its clutch.

0:41:300:41:36

But the Crown Victoria with 426,000 miles

0:41:360:41:42

has gone another 500 miles.

0:41:420:41:45

At 35 cents a mile!

0:41:450:41:47

Yes! Yes! We did it! Tanner!

0:41:520:41:56

Tanner! I guess you know, I won!

0:41:560:41:59

For 45 bucks, I could take you to the airport!

0:42:010:42:05

45 bucks seems a little bit steep.

0:42:050:42:08

In a Crown Vic!

0:42:080:42:10

HE CACKLES

0:42:100:42:12

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:42:120:42:13

Ladies and gentlemen, the Crown Victoria.

0:42:130:42:16

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:42:160:42:20

I've got to give it up, that car is really something.

0:42:200:42:23

Especially when you consider all the extras that came for free.

0:42:230:42:26

-The vomit.

-The blood and the urine.

0:42:260:42:30

Oh, and the victory.

0:42:300:42:31

You know, the real victory here is that for once

0:42:330:42:35

we found a car that you can't kill in a show.

0:42:350:42:38

Let's hear it for Adam, he had a car last a whole show!

0:42:380:42:41

Finally. Finally.

0:42:410:42:43

Unbelievable.

0:42:430:42:44

I think the real lesson here is that you should drive

0:42:440:42:48

a Crown Victoria every day.

0:42:480:42:49

OK, and then you drive this pet wagon every day.

0:42:490:42:52

I think just standing next to this car is taking years off our life.

0:42:520:42:55

We have got to get out of here.

0:42:550:42:57

That's our show, thanks for watching, everybody.

0:42:570:43:00

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