Browse content similar to Carry On at Your Convenience. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!
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MUSIC: "Oh, dear what can the matter be?" | 0:00:02 | 0:00:04 | |
# Three old ladies locked in the lavatory. # | 0:00:04 | 0:00:08 | |
-"Four matching pairs wash basins for Carters, Aberdeen." -Check. | 0:01:32 | 0:01:40 | |
-"Two Princess Suites, complete with stainless steel fittings for Girlings, London." -Check. | 0:01:40 | 0:01:46 | |
-"Six top-flushing urinals." -Stand-up ones? -Is there any other sort? | 0:01:46 | 0:01:52 | |
Funny things happen these days. | 0:01:52 | 0:01:54 | |
"Six top-flushing urinals, regular design for the YWCA, Wigan." | 0:01:54 | 0:02:00 | |
-"One matching pa..." Y -W -C A? | 0:02:00 | 0:02:03 | |
Funny things DO happen! | 0:02:03 | 0:02:05 | |
Well, Miss Withering, how does it feel? | 0:02:14 | 0:02:18 | |
Comfortable? Yes, I think so, Mr Boggs. | 0:02:18 | 0:02:21 | |
-Good! Comfort before beauty. -It's a bit big in the bowl, I think. | 0:02:21 | 0:02:26 | |
By 2 centimetres. We shan't fall out over that. | 0:02:26 | 0:02:30 | |
It's falling IN I'm worried about! | 0:02:30 | 0:02:33 | |
- I like your overall design, Mr Coote. - Thank you. | 0:02:33 | 0:02:38 | |
- May I get off now, please? - Of course! Thank you, you've been most patient. | 0:02:38 | 0:02:44 | |
-Like Job on a monument! -The catch must be strong to support the seat. | 0:02:44 | 0:02:50 | |
-Do you mind if I try it? -No, go ahead! Yes, do! | 0:02:50 | 0:02:54 | |
-I couldn't stand it for more than 30 minutes. -It's not a reading room! | 0:03:05 | 0:03:11 | |
-Look at this. Very slender, this pedestal. -Hmm. It's streamlined! | 0:03:11 | 0:03:17 | |
What for? Wind resistance? | 0:03:17 | 0:03:20 | |
The thickness has no bearing on tensile strength. | 0:03:20 | 0:03:24 | |
I've had bitter experience of what happens when one collapses - or rather, my wife had, rest her soul. | 0:03:24 | 0:03:32 | |
I can assure you, sir, an elephant could safely use that toilet. | 0:03:32 | 0:03:37 | |
Not without a much bigger bowl! | 0:03:37 | 0:03:40 | |
We can't afford to take chances. Dependability before beauty! | 0:03:40 | 0:03:45 | |
Miss Withering, just one more time, and this time come down on it like a TON of bricks! | 0:03:45 | 0:03:52 | |
So far, so good. Now just bump up and down. | 0:03:52 | 0:03:57 | |
Excellent! Excellent! Bump! Bump! | 0:03:57 | 0:04:01 | |
Things that go prrt! in the night. | 0:04:01 | 0:04:04 | |
-"One matching pair" of what? -Beauts. | 0:04:07 | 0:04:10 | |
"One matching pair of be..."? Eh? | 0:04:10 | 0:04:12 | |
-Hello, Myrt love. -Hello, Vic. | 0:04:12 | 0:04:15 | |
-How about it this afternoon? -Not standing up. | 0:04:15 | 0:04:19 | |
No, sitting down. I've got grandstand tickets. Kick-off is at 3. | 0:04:19 | 0:04:25 | |
Three o'clock! We're working till 5.30! | 0:04:25 | 0:04:29 | |
I wouldn't bet on that, love. I'll take you out for supper after. | 0:04:29 | 0:04:34 | |
Got a cup of tea? No more floor service. | 0:04:34 | 0:04:39 | |
-What? -New rule. Drinks to be served in the canteen during official breaks. | 0:04:39 | 0:04:45 | |
That's taking a diabolical liberty! | 0:04:45 | 0:04:49 | |
And that's something you know ALL about! | 0:04:49 | 0:04:53 | |
-Do you mind? I'll not let them away with this! -I didn't want a cup anyway. | 0:04:53 | 0:04:59 | |
That's irreverent! This constitutes an infringement of workers' rights. | 0:04:59 | 0:05:04 | |
Old Tinderbottom's off again. Another strike I suppose. | 0:05:04 | 0:05:09 | |
Oh no, what's it for? | 0:05:09 | 0:05:12 | |
You know our Vic. He's never known what it's for! | 0:05:12 | 0:05:16 | |
Oh, I'm terribly sorry, Mr Boggs. | 0:05:22 | 0:05:24 | |
I should have sounded my hooter, Miss Plummer. | 0:05:24 | 0:05:28 | |
-There's "Silver Spoon", at it again. -He can't help being the boss's son. | 0:05:28 | 0:05:34 | |
Privileged class, sitting on his... | 0:05:34 | 0:05:37 | |
The girls call him "Pencil-doings" that's how privileged HE is! | 0:05:37 | 0:05:42 | |
-Morning, all. -Morning, Mr Boggs. | 0:05:48 | 0:05:51 | |
I'd like to see you for a few moments, please. | 0:05:53 | 0:05:58 | |
All right, but make it quick, Spanner. | 0:05:58 | 0:06:01 | |
I understand a new rule has been introduced that tea may no longer be served outside the canteen. | 0:06:01 | 0:06:09 | |
-That's right. I made it. -Oh, well, as the Union's representative I wish to protest! | 0:06:09 | 0:06:15 | |
-It infringes the Workers' rights. -Come off it! -I'll show you in the "Nooky" rule book. | 0:06:15 | 0:06:22 | |
They're making rules about THAT now? | 0:06:23 | 0:06:26 | |
N.U.C.I.E. "The National Union of Chinaware Industrial Employees." | 0:06:27 | 0:06:33 | |
You know what you can do with their rule book. | 0:06:33 | 0:06:37 | |
-What's that? -I'll give you a clue. | 0:06:37 | 0:06:40 | |
These pages are just about the same size as our toilet-paper holders. | 0:06:40 | 0:06:45 | |
Now d'you get the idea? | 0:06:45 | 0:06:47 | |
Great, steaming Public School nit. You all heard him. | 0:06:47 | 0:06:52 | |
-Aggravation of a genuine grievance. -Everybody out. | 0:06:52 | 0:06:57 | |
What did I tell you? | 0:06:57 | 0:06:59 | |
Meeting in the canteen in ten minutes. | 0:07:00 | 0:07:03 | |
-Meeting...when was it? -Ten minutes. | 0:07:03 | 0:07:06 | |
-Meeting in ten minutes...where? -The canteen. -Meeting in ten... -They KNOW. | 0:07:06 | 0:07:12 | |
-Oh! Excuse me. -Lewis, my boy. | 0:07:19 | 0:07:21 | |
We're just discussing the new Princess Beatrice suite. | 0:07:21 | 0:07:26 | |
-Please don't get up, Miss Withering. -But I want to get up, Mr Lewis. | 0:07:26 | 0:07:33 | |
Rather elegant, wouldn't you say? | 0:07:33 | 0:07:36 | |
I thought we were modernising our stuff, and including a bidet. | 0:07:36 | 0:07:42 | |
I designed one. Mr Boggs sat on it. | 0:07:42 | 0:07:45 | |
- On the idea, I mean. - Bidets are not quite US. | 0:07:46 | 0:07:51 | |
-All our competitors make them. -I dare say, but I thought the limited demand... | 0:07:51 | 0:07:58 | |
-Limited demand?! I told you about that enquiry from abroad for a thousand of them. -I know. | 0:07:58 | 0:08:05 | |
But my grandfather wouldn't have approved of the name Boggs being associated with such an article. | 0:08:05 | 0:08:12 | |
-Can't you persuade him? -It's as easy washing your feet in the bath | 0:08:12 | 0:08:18 | |
-They're not for washing your feet! -Are they for dogs to drink out of? -No! | 0:08:18 | 0:08:25 | |
If it's for that, do a headstand in the shower. | 0:08:26 | 0:08:31 | |
-Lewis, my boy. -Sssh. | 0:08:31 | 0:08:34 | |
-Can you hear anything? -No. | 0:08:34 | 0:08:37 | |
-Nor can I. -Well, that's all right. -No, it's not. They've stopped work. | 0:08:37 | 0:08:42 | |
I tell you, it is time we made a stand. | 0:08:47 | 0:08:51 | |
It is time the bosses learned they can't mess the worker about. | 0:08:51 | 0:08:56 | |
-What do you say? -Down with 'em! -That's right. | 0:08:56 | 0:09:00 | |
The bloated bureaucrats must see they can't grind our faces in the dust! | 0:09:00 | 0:09:06 | |
-What do you say? -Down with 'em! -That's right. | 0:09:06 | 0:09:09 | |
This issue isn't just over when you can have a cuppa. | 0:09:09 | 0:09:14 | |
-Oh, no! This ruling is another blow aimed at the fundamental rights of the worker. -Hear, hear! | 0:09:14 | 0:09:21 | |
It's another prod at the vitals of your personal freedom. | 0:09:21 | 0:09:26 | |
I haven't noticed anyone prodding my vitals! | 0:09:26 | 0:09:29 | |
Good for you. Ready for you any time. | 0:09:29 | 0:09:33 | |
-LAUGHTER -Yes, all right, quiet please. | 0:09:33 | 0:09:37 | |
But I seem to remember that you got very upset when they banned you women from wearing trousers. | 0:09:37 | 0:09:44 | |
-What about that? -Down with 'em! | 0:09:44 | 0:09:47 | |
Cheeky, Bernie. | 0:09:47 | 0:09:49 | |
-I didn't mean down with the trousers. -Anyway, I'm now calling for an immediate stoppage of work, | 0:09:49 | 0:09:56 | |
pending reinstatement of the tea rounds. Those in favour, raise your hand. Count 'em. | 0:09:56 | 0:10:03 | |
Are you in favour? | 0:10:06 | 0:10:08 | |
-Of course I am, you fool! -Oh, well...that makes two. | 0:10:08 | 0:10:14 | |
That's that. Mind if we get back to work? | 0:10:14 | 0:10:18 | |
Wait one more minute, please. | 0:10:18 | 0:10:20 | |
I would like to make a last appeal to your reason and commonsense. I'll call for one more vote, | 0:10:20 | 0:10:27 | |
and remember the Rovers are playing at home today, | 0:10:27 | 0:10:32 | |
and kick-off is at three o'clock. Right, all those in favour? | 0:10:32 | 0:10:37 | |
Count 'em. | 0:10:39 | 0:10:41 | |
Hello. ..Trouble. | 0:10:44 | 0:10:47 | |
Never saw so many people wanting to leave the room at the same time. | 0:10:47 | 0:10:53 | |
I have to inform you, it has been decided by a majority vote | 0:10:55 | 0:11:00 | |
that unless the tea rounds are returned there will be a walk out. | 0:11:00 | 0:11:05 | |
We're playing at home today, aren't we? | 0:11:05 | 0:11:08 | |
-You're not going to let them get away with this? -Leave it to me. | 0:11:08 | 0:11:13 | |
The tea rounds were laid on by management as a privilege. | 0:11:13 | 0:11:18 | |
-Doing away with them hardly breaks any union rules. -That's where you're wrong and I quote: | 0:11:18 | 0:11:26 | |
Page 154, paragraph 79... B. "Treatment of the Workers." | 0:11:26 | 0:11:32 | |
"Action may be taken if management doesn't provide adequate facilities for the workers' natural needs." | 0:11:32 | 0:11:39 | |
-"Natural needs"? -Drinking for instance. | 0:11:39 | 0:11:42 | |
So's sex, but that doesn't mean they have to lay on crumpet! | 0:11:42 | 0:11:48 | |
Very funny, Mr Plummer, very funny. But are you prepared to reinstate the tea-rounds? | 0:11:48 | 0:11:54 | |
You know I can't, but I'll pass on your complaint to the management. All right? | 0:11:54 | 0:12:01 | |
No, we need a positive guarantee. | 0:12:01 | 0:12:04 | |
-Why don't we have a talk about it? -No! -Mr Lewis... -NO. Now, listen to me. -Blimey! | 0:12:04 | 0:12:11 | |
You may not know what it means, but I have made a Time and Motion Study. | 0:12:11 | 0:12:17 | |
I know what it means. And, if you've got the time, I've certainly got the motion! | 0:12:17 | 0:12:24 | |
-And I've noticed it, especially in your main production department. -Oh, you cheeky devil! | 0:12:24 | 0:12:32 | |
-I'd like to show you how it works. -SHE knows! | 0:12:33 | 0:12:37 | |
Mr Lewis, are we or are we not going to get what we want? | 0:12:39 | 0:12:45 | |
That's up to Mrs Moore! | 0:12:45 | 0:12:48 | |
-I mean, on the factory floor. -Not ruddy likely! | 0:12:49 | 0:12:53 | |
Now, let's get down to business. | 0:12:58 | 0:13:01 | |
Sounds just like my old man! | 0:13:01 | 0:13:04 | |
All right. | 0:13:05 | 0:13:07 | |
In this factory, 166 extra mugs of tea are served in one week. | 0:13:07 | 0:13:12 | |
Assuming that a worker goes to the toilet for every pint consumed, | 0:13:12 | 0:13:18 | |
he will make 16 trips in one day. | 0:13:18 | 0:13:21 | |
Poor devil! He must have a weakness. | 0:13:21 | 0:13:24 | |
Not quite, Mr Hulke. It means that if a trip takes four and a half minutes | 0:13:24 | 0:13:30 | |
72 minutes are lost in each day. | 0:13:30 | 0:13:33 | |
Which equals 15 hours lost weekly going to the toilet. | 0:13:33 | 0:13:37 | |
So, what is the answer? | 0:13:37 | 0:13:40 | |
Tie a knot in it. | 0:13:40 | 0:13:43 | |
Quite. But a less painful solution, I think, is to cut out the extra tea rounds. | 0:13:45 | 0:13:51 | |
Just one moment, please, Mr Lewis. Do the management want the workers to stop going to the shi...loo | 0:13:52 | 0:13:59 | |
-when they want to? -Not exactly. -You want to cut down on the number of trips? | 0:13:59 | 0:14:05 | |
Yes, that's it. | 0:14:05 | 0:14:07 | |
-A clear case of restrictive practice. -Right into it. | 0:14:07 | 0:14:12 | |
Everybody out! | 0:14:12 | 0:14:14 | |
Fine mess I made of that. | 0:14:21 | 0:14:23 | |
-You could have done what they wanted. -I don't give in easily. | 0:14:23 | 0:14:28 | |
-You'll have to if you want 'em back tomorrow. -I know. But it gives us a free afternoon. -Us? | 0:14:28 | 0:14:36 | |
-Yes, we can have a nice run and then something to eat. -Sorry. | 0:14:36 | 0:14:40 | |
-I'll pick you up outside the Odeon at 2.30. -Lewis! | 0:14:40 | 0:14:45 | |
Try not to be late. There's "no waiting" there. | 0:14:45 | 0:14:49 | |
Ah! Spanner! | 0:14:49 | 0:14:52 | |
-Thanks! I was worried we might have to work this afternoon. -What about your production loss? | 0:14:52 | 0:14:59 | |
Think of the wages we're saving! | 0:14:59 | 0:15:02 | |
What's up with him? He's gone potty. | 0:15:04 | 0:15:07 | |
No, he's learning some sense at last! | 0:15:07 | 0:15:11 | |
Saving on the wages? What's he on about? | 0:15:11 | 0:15:15 | |
-Anyway, are you all right for this afternoon? -No, Vic, I promised to help Mum with things. | 0:15:15 | 0:15:22 | |
-Instead of the football? -Yeah! Funny girl, aren't I? | 0:15:22 | 0:15:27 | |
Blimey! She's gone potty, an' all. | 0:15:27 | 0:15:30 | |
Saving on the wages? | 0:15:30 | 0:15:32 | |
Excuse the rush, but I've got a lot to do. 'Bye. | 0:15:40 | 0:15:44 | |
-Wish I had a lot to do. -Don't we all? Thanks for the lift. | 0:15:46 | 0:15:51 | |
-See you down the pub? -No. The Lord and Master is home. | 0:15:51 | 0:15:56 | |
-Then you'll have plenty to do. -Huh! Fred is a Saturday nighter. | 0:15:56 | 0:16:01 | |
-What a waste! -You never stop, I suppose? | 0:16:01 | 0:16:05 | |
Only to fill my pipe! | 0:16:05 | 0:16:08 | |
That'll do, saucy! | 0:16:10 | 0:16:13 | |
Hello, Fred, Sid just gave me a lift home. | 0:16:13 | 0:16:17 | |
I hope that's all he gave you. Fred! | 0:16:18 | 0:16:23 | |
CHLOE: Spanner organised a walk out. | 0:16:23 | 0:16:26 | |
-How can I sell our products if you don't make 'em? -Only the 13th strike this year. | 0:16:26 | 0:16:32 | |
-What's it about? -The take in and put out figures. | 0:16:32 | 0:16:37 | |
-The take in and put out figures? -The tea and pee figures! | 0:16:37 | 0:16:43 | |
Sid! I'm glad you find it so funny. | 0:16:43 | 0:16:47 | |
-Yes. -Trouble at the works! We seem to have it once a week. | 0:16:47 | 0:16:52 | |
-Isn't that how you like it? -Let's eat. I could do with a bit. | 0:16:52 | 0:16:58 | |
Spoken like a TRUE man! | 0:16:58 | 0:17:01 | |
That's all I need - a face-full of soggy knickers! | 0:17:14 | 0:17:19 | |
Eugh! | 0:17:21 | 0:17:22 | |
Nice Joey. Pretty Joey. Pretty little boy then. | 0:17:22 | 0:17:27 | |
Nice little boy then. Who's a nice little boy? | 0:17:27 | 0:17:32 | |
Going to say "Hello, Mummy"? Hello, Mummy. Go on, say it. Hello, Mummy! | 0:17:32 | 0:17:38 | |
Look what Mummy's got for him. A nice little toy. | 0:17:38 | 0:17:43 | |
TOY RATTLES A nice little toy for a clever boy! | 0:17:43 | 0:17:47 | |
Ta, Mummy. | 0:17:47 | 0:17:49 | |
Oh, blimey! Can't you give that poor bleeding bird a rest? | 0:17:49 | 0:17:54 | |
-The only way you get them to talk is by chatting. -Chatting, yes, not nagging 'im to death. | 0:17:54 | 0:18:01 | |
-He ought to talk. -He would if he could get a word in. -I -still have trouble! | 0:18:01 | 0:18:07 | |
If only he'd give a little chirp, that would be something. He ought to make some sort of noise. | 0:18:07 | 0:18:14 | |
-How about dinner? -He's got plenty to eat. | 0:18:14 | 0:18:17 | |
For ME, not for him. | 0:18:17 | 0:18:20 | |
-Haven't you had anything? -No. Didn't Myrtle say there's a strike? | 0:18:20 | 0:18:25 | |
-No. I wondered why she was home at lunchtime. -Now you know. | 0:18:25 | 0:18:31 | |
Did you hear that, Joey? All those naughty men are on strike again! | 0:18:31 | 0:18:36 | |
Naughty men! Naughty men! | 0:18:36 | 0:18:38 | |
-How about something to eat? -I've had something. -For ME! | 0:18:38 | 0:18:44 | |
Ohhh. Well...I could make you some beans on toast, I think. | 0:18:44 | 0:18:49 | |
No, nothing elaborate, thank you. | 0:18:49 | 0:18:52 | |
Mummy's just going to get Daddy some din-dins. | 0:18:52 | 0:18:56 | |
-Will you be all right? -Of COURSE he will. What can he do? Chuck himself into his drink? | 0:18:56 | 0:19:03 | |
Being left alone upsets him, and then he (dirties his cage). | 0:19:03 | 0:19:09 | |
She spoils you to budgery. D'you know that? | 0:19:14 | 0:19:19 | |
CRASH OF CROCKERY | 0:19:20 | 0:19:22 | |
What do you think your daddy's got for you today, then? A honey ring! Yes! | 0:19:27 | 0:19:35 | |
What you got to say to that, then? | 0:19:35 | 0:19:37 | |
Ta, Daddy. | 0:19:37 | 0:19:40 | |
Ta, Daddy. Come on, mate, you can talk to me. Ta. | 0:19:40 | 0:19:44 | |
TA! | 0:19:44 | 0:19:46 | |
My washing's all over the floor in there. | 0:19:46 | 0:19:50 | |
-What you doing to him? -Nothing. -Oh, yes, you are! What's nasty Daddy been doing to him, then? | 0:19:50 | 0:19:57 | |
Nasty Daddy bought a honey ring! Are you reporting me to the RSPCA? | 0:19:57 | 0:20:02 | |
-Did the nasty man buy him a horrid old honey ring? -Dear, oh dear! | 0:20:02 | 0:20:07 | |
-He won't talk if you stuff him up with food! -One honey ring won't stop him talking! | 0:20:07 | 0:20:15 | |
-If I thought that, I'd have bought you a crate of them! -Mummy'll take it away. | 0:20:15 | 0:20:21 | |
-That cost me a pint of beer. -Look what's happened! | 0:20:21 | 0:20:25 | |
Well (he's done something). Here, hold this. | 0:20:25 | 0:20:29 | |
Never mind, Joey, Mummy'll make him nice and clean again. | 0:20:29 | 0:20:33 | |
Yes, she will. Little Joey, nice clean boy. | 0:20:33 | 0:20:38 | |
FRED BURPS | 0:20:49 | 0:20:52 | |
- He's after you, you know. - Eh? Who? | 0:20:52 | 0:20:55 | |
- Sid Plummer. - WHAT? You're joking! What d'you mean, he's after me? | 0:20:55 | 0:21:03 | |
I'm a commercial traveller. I know when a bloke's on the make. | 0:21:03 | 0:21:08 | |
I mean, I've seen the others at it. | 0:21:08 | 0:21:11 | |
Because he gives me a lift home? | 0:21:11 | 0:21:14 | |
It's the way he looks at you. Mind, you ask for it. Flashing your legs and things all over the place. | 0:21:14 | 0:21:21 | |
- What? - Like two bald-headed convicts trying to burst out of gaol. | 0:21:21 | 0:21:28 | |
- You're jealous. - I wouldn't be seen dead with those two! | 0:21:28 | 0:21:33 | |
- I mean of Sid. - At his dangerous age a bloke will try almost anything. | 0:21:33 | 0:21:39 | |
Oh well, thank you VERY much. | 0:21:39 | 0:21:42 | |
I didn't mean that. I get worried about you, me being away so much. | 0:21:42 | 0:21:48 | |
Fred, do you really think I'd want to play around with anyone else, | 0:21:48 | 0:21:53 | |
when I've got a smashing bloke like you to play around with? | 0:21:53 | 0:21:58 | |
If there's no prime beef, women will make do with scrag end. | 0:21:58 | 0:22:03 | |
You want to make sure there's plenty of prime beef when I need it! | 0:22:03 | 0:22:10 | |
Hey, mind my trousers! Take 'em off. | 0:22:10 | 0:22:13 | |
In the middle of the day? I've got the day off. | 0:22:13 | 0:22:17 | |
There's a time and place for everything. If you've got the time, | 0:22:17 | 0:22:22 | |
I've got the place. Before tea?! | 0:22:22 | 0:22:24 | |
ROAR OF ENGINE | 0:22:29 | 0:22:32 | |
Thanks. Want to come to the game? | 0:22:32 | 0:22:35 | |
ENGINE ROARING Hello, Mrs Spanner. You all right? | 0:22:35 | 0:22:39 | |
Shut that bloody row! SHUT UP. | 0:22:39 | 0:22:42 | |
-What did she say? -TURN that off! | 0:22:42 | 0:22:45 | |
-Turn it off! -I'll turn this off. Now, what is it? | 0:22:45 | 0:22:49 | |
-I SAID, turn it off. -It IS off. | 0:22:49 | 0:22:52 | |
-Do you want a ticket for the game? -Yes. | 0:22:52 | 0:22:56 | |
Pick me up at half-past two. | 0:22:56 | 0:22:58 | |
Vic, I think you handled the men marvellous. | 0:22:58 | 0:23:02 | |
Oh...just a natural gift, that. Some men are born with the quality to leadership. | 0:23:02 | 0:23:08 | |
-I don't agree with the blokes. -What? | 0:23:08 | 0:23:12 | |
-That you're a miserable little leader. Size isn't important. -You'd better go. | 0:23:12 | 0:23:18 | |
And don't you worry, Vic... | 0:23:18 | 0:23:21 | |
they'll laugh the other side of their faces, when you're Prime Minister. | 0:23:21 | 0:23:27 | |
Good-for-nothing sod! Just like his father, may he rest in pieces! | 0:23:27 | 0:23:33 | |
-Well, well, if it isn't my dear, sweet, old Mum. -Don't you come slobbering over me. | 0:23:33 | 0:23:40 | |
And tell that half-witted giant if he brings that motorbike again I'll kick him where it hurts. | 0:23:40 | 0:23:47 | |
-This is a refined neighbourhood and don't you bloody well forget it! -You remind me so nicely(!) | 0:23:47 | 0:23:54 | |
Shut up and sit down or you'll be late for your work. | 0:23:54 | 0:23:58 | |
Oh, em...We...em We don't have to go back today. | 0:23:58 | 0:24:03 | |
Eh? You've started another bloody strike. HAVEN'T you? | 0:24:03 | 0:24:08 | |
The men had a grievance and I could not watch them being ground under foot. | 0:24:08 | 0:24:14 | |
-Crap! -I am working for the workers' good. | 0:24:14 | 0:24:18 | |
-You've never done a day's work! Like your father! -My father was a victim... | 0:24:18 | 0:24:24 | |
..of a gin-ridden society! Without the lodgers, where would we be?! | 0:24:24 | 0:24:29 | |
-I pay my way. -I forgot about that. I've been wondering what I'd do with your £4 this week. | 0:24:29 | 0:24:36 | |
-Take myself to the Bahamas? -If I'm not welcome... | 0:24:36 | 0:24:40 | |
Sit down on your backside! | 0:24:40 | 0:24:43 | |
If you spent less time talking through it we might get somewhere. | 0:24:43 | 0:24:48 | |
Now, we've got to feed the poor bloody, hard-working strikers. | 0:24:48 | 0:24:53 | |
-There you are! -Cold sausages? -What?! -You're spoiling me, giving me it 15 times in one week. | 0:24:53 | 0:25:01 | |
< Coo-ee. I'm in the dining room, Mr Coote. | 0:25:01 | 0:25:05 | |
Oh, hello! There you are. Lunch is ready. | 0:25:05 | 0:25:09 | |
- Unless you want to wash your hands? - I think I can wait until after. | 0:25:09 | 0:25:14 | |
Sit here, Mr Coote, I've put a clean napkin in your ring. | 0:25:14 | 0:25:20 | |
You're TOO good to me! I'm only glad to have a REAL gentleman here. | 0:25:20 | 0:25:26 | |
- Since my dear husband passed on, I've missed it. - I'm sure! | 0:25:26 | 0:25:32 | |
How's VicTOR? | 0:25:32 | 0:25:34 | |
..All right. | 0:25:34 | 0:25:37 | |
I've got your favourite. You haven't! Steak and kidney pie. | 0:25:37 | 0:25:42 | |
Dear Mrs Spanner. You spoil me! | 0:25:42 | 0:25:46 | |
A nice, clean boy again, then. | 0:25:48 | 0:25:51 | |
What you going to say? Ta, Mummy. Ta, Mummy. | 0:25:51 | 0:25:55 | |
-Talk about a non-stop performance. -His beak opened and closed there. | 0:25:55 | 0:26:00 | |
-No? -Yes! -Fancy! | 0:26:00 | 0:26:02 | |
We'll have to write to the newspapers about that. | 0:26:02 | 0:26:07 | |
-He generally just sits there doing nothing. -He's a mimic. He's copying you. | 0:26:07 | 0:26:13 | |
-Say hello, Mummy. Go on. -What's this stuff on the table for? Are we having an exhibition? | 0:26:13 | 0:26:21 | |
-D'you want me to clear it, then? -No, no, I can manage. | 0:26:21 | 0:26:25 | |
Say hello, Mummy. Hello. Go on. | 0:26:25 | 0:26:28 | |
Hello, Mummy. CRASH! | 0:26:28 | 0:26:31 | |
I don't understand it. Mrs Phillips' bird talked in three months. Whole sentences. | 0:26:32 | 0:26:38 | |
They weren't nice things. It had to be covered when the vicar called. | 0:26:38 | 0:26:43 | |
-We should get rid of him. -No! He's company for me. That was the whole idea. | 0:26:43 | 0:26:50 | |
It's all right for you. You go to work and enjoy yourself. I'm here alone all day. | 0:26:50 | 0:26:57 | |
D'you mind? I'm trying to work out my bets. | 0:26:57 | 0:27:01 | |
I wonder if he wants a little mate? | 0:27:01 | 0:27:05 | |
What would he want a little mate for? | 0:27:05 | 0:27:08 | |
-Give him something to do. -What? | 0:27:08 | 0:27:12 | |
-You know! -No, I don't. Birds and fishes are a mystery. What do they do? | 0:27:12 | 0:27:18 | |
Oh, don't be silly! | 0:27:18 | 0:27:21 | |
They...bill and coo. | 0:27:21 | 0:27:23 | |
-What with? -I don't have to go into details, do I? | 0:27:23 | 0:27:28 | |
Males and females all look the same. WE can tell what we've got hold of, but how can they tell? | 0:27:28 | 0:27:35 | |
Well, we know Joey's a "he" bird. | 0:27:35 | 0:27:39 | |
-Cock. -He is! The shopkeeper said so. | 0:27:39 | 0:27:43 | |
-Cock bird, not "he" bird. -You wouldn't call yourself a cock man! | 0:27:43 | 0:27:48 | |
Opportunity would be a fine thing! | 0:27:48 | 0:27:52 | |
REVS ENGINE | 0:27:52 | 0:27:54 | |
Shut that row, and move that thing! | 0:28:00 | 0:28:03 | |
-ENGINE ROARING -Not so much noise! | 0:28:03 | 0:28:06 | |
-Me mum's... -Go on, you gormless lump! | 0:28:06 | 0:28:10 | |
Go on! | 0:28:10 | 0:28:12 | |
Quite right, Mrs Spanner! Mind your own bloody business. | 0:28:12 | 0:28:17 | |
I'm sorry, I didn't realise you were here. | 0:28:19 | 0:28:23 | |
Oh, that's all right... Agatha. Has Victor gone? | 0:28:23 | 0:28:28 | |
Yes, Charles. We're all alone now. | 0:28:28 | 0:28:31 | |
- Good. How about it then? - I really ought to do the dishes. | 0:28:31 | 0:28:37 | |
They can wait. Just a quick one. | 0:28:37 | 0:28:39 | |
I find to hard to say no to you. | 0:28:39 | 0:28:42 | |
You like it as much as I do. | 0:28:42 | 0:28:44 | |
Very well. I'll draw the curtains. | 0:28:45 | 0:28:47 | |
Right? Yes. | 0:28:54 | 0:28:56 | |
Cut for deal. | 0:28:56 | 0:28:58 | |
-OW! -What's the matter? Did you lose something? -Damn near. | 0:29:10 | 0:29:15 | |
Stay there. | 0:29:15 | 0:29:17 | |
So that's your game? | 0:29:25 | 0:29:28 | |
-Follow that car. -What car? -The one with Myrtle in it. -Who? | 0:29:28 | 0:29:32 | |
-Get going. -Right, we're off! | 0:29:32 | 0:29:35 | |
-Wasting time? -You never win on the horses. | 0:29:49 | 0:29:54 | |
How ignorant can you get? I work it out scientifically, I study form. | 0:29:54 | 0:30:00 | |
-You don't win. -They don't run scientifically. | 0:30:00 | 0:30:05 | |
You throw that money away, while we go without. | 0:30:05 | 0:30:09 | |
-I don't notice you going without anything. -Even if you won sometimes. | 0:30:09 | 0:30:15 | |
-Could you do better? -I couldn't do worse. | 0:30:15 | 0:30:19 | |
I'll read out the runners in the Newmarket 3 o'clock. You pick the winners. | 0:30:19 | 0:30:26 | |
-But we won't know the winners till tonight. -This is yesterday's! | 0:30:26 | 0:30:30 | |
-Oh. -Here we go. | 0:30:31 | 0:30:33 | |
"Antony Watt. Jomon. | 0:30:33 | 0:30:36 | |
"Carbia. Cleopatra." | 0:30:36 | 0:30:39 | |
JOEY CHIRPS Sid! Did you hear that? | 0:30:39 | 0:30:44 | |
Yes. His very first chirp. How about that? | 0:30:45 | 0:30:49 | |
-It must have been one of them words. -What words? -Them horses' names. -Cleopatra? | 0:30:49 | 0:30:55 | |
-CHIRPS There! -Yes. | 0:30:55 | 0:30:58 | |
Does he like that word? Cleopatra! JOEY CHIRPS | 0:30:58 | 0:31:02 | |
-Cleopatra! CHIRPS Cleopatra! -All right! | 0:31:02 | 0:31:06 | |
-Don't tire him out. -Isn't it exciting? -Yes. | 0:31:06 | 0:31:10 | |
-Well, it's time he did something else apart from dropping good luck messages. -Awww. | 0:31:10 | 0:31:17 | |
If Joey liked that one I'll pick it. | 0:31:17 | 0:31:21 | |
-Cleopatra? -CHIRPS | 0:31:21 | 0:31:23 | |
-It was a 10-1 shot. No chance. -Well, what won? | 0:31:23 | 0:31:27 | |
-By three lengths... Cleopatra. -JOEY CHIRPS There you are! | 0:31:27 | 0:31:32 | |
-You didn't pick it, the bird did! -Well, it won, didn't it? | 0:31:32 | 0:31:37 | |
Are you potty? What does he know about horses? | 0:31:38 | 0:31:42 | |
-I don't know, but he's done better in one race than you have the whole season. -That's NOT the point, is it? | 0:31:42 | 0:31:49 | |
YOU said you could pick them better than me. Right, here's the 3.30 runners. | 0:31:49 | 0:31:56 | |
"Diddy Ching. Fast Dayboy. | 0:31:56 | 0:31:59 | |
"Golden Gay. | 0:31:59 | 0:32:01 | |
-"Tiny Tim" -JOEY CHIRPS | 0:32:01 | 0:32:03 | |
-Keep out of this. -That'll do me. Tiny Tim. CHIRPS | 0:32:03 | 0:32:08 | |
-Just 'cos he chirped again? -Yes. | 0:32:08 | 0:32:11 | |
-Well, who won? -This is ridiculous. | 0:32:11 | 0:32:14 | |
We can't all pick scientifically. Who won? | 0:32:14 | 0:32:18 | |
-Tiny Tim. -CHIRPS | 0:32:18 | 0:32:21 | |
-Four-to-one. -There you are, you see. Now are you satisfied? | 0:32:21 | 0:32:26 | |
There's a clever boy, then. | 0:32:26 | 0:32:28 | |
-Did he pick two winners for Mummy? -Shut up a minute. I want to try another one. -I don't want to do it. | 0:32:28 | 0:32:36 | |
NOT you, HIM! Listen, Mush, here are the runners of the 4 o'clock. Concentrate. | 0:32:36 | 0:32:43 | |
"The Woozer. | 0:32:43 | 0:32:45 | |
"X-Ray. Double Dwelling." | 0:32:45 | 0:32:48 | |
I'll see you. Two pairs. | 0:32:48 | 0:32:51 | |
Oh dear, you've beaten me again! | 0:32:51 | 0:32:55 | |
I knew this would be my lucky day! No looking. | 0:32:55 | 0:32:59 | |
Hello, Mrs Spragg. It's got very cold. | 0:33:10 | 0:33:13 | |
Not surprising. | 0:33:13 | 0:33:16 | |
DOOR CLOSES | 0:33:22 | 0:33:25 | |
I thought I heard the front door. Yes. | 0:33:25 | 0:33:28 | |
Victor! | 0:33:36 | 0:33:38 | |
-What are you doing without any trousers? -You can talk! | 0:33:38 | 0:33:43 | |
Eh? ..Oooh! Aaah! | 0:33:43 | 0:33:45 | |
"Polar Prince. | 0:33:47 | 0:33:49 | |
"Silver Plate. | 0:33:49 | 0:33:51 | |
-"Pollyanna." -CHIRPS | 0:33:51 | 0:33:53 | |
-Well, did it? -Yes. He's picked the winner of every race yesterday. | 0:33:53 | 0:33:58 | |
-He must have seen the results in the paper. -What are you TALKING about? He can't read! | 0:33:58 | 0:34:05 | |
-How do you know? You didn't know how they made love. -He's getting information from somewhere. Where? | 0:34:05 | 0:34:13 | |
-TALK. -You know he can't talk. -Big, fat, beady-eyed useless lump. | 0:34:13 | 0:34:18 | |
Don't talk to him like that. Anyway, he's picked all the winners. | 0:34:18 | 0:34:24 | |
AFTER they'd run. If he could pick 'em before they... | 0:34:24 | 0:34:28 | |
I wonder. What's the time? | 0:34:29 | 0:34:32 | |
-Half-past three. -I can be at the betting shop by 4.30. | 0:34:32 | 0:34:37 | |
Now, listen, genius, big, handsome lad. | 0:34:37 | 0:34:41 | |
-What you going to do to him? -I'm going to read you the runners of the 4.30 at Kempton today. | 0:34:41 | 0:34:49 | |
Relax, think carefully. Winners only. | 0:34:49 | 0:34:53 | |
"Family Steps. | 0:34:53 | 0:34:55 | |
"Petticoat. | 0:34:55 | 0:34:57 | |
-"Peewit The Third" -CHIRPS | 0:34:57 | 0:35:00 | |
-Peewit The Third? -CHIRPS | 0:35:00 | 0:35:03 | |
You must be out of your tiny mind! | 0:35:03 | 0:35:06 | |
-You've made him dirty his cage again. -I'm not surprised! Peewit The Third. -CHIRPS -All right. | 0:35:07 | 0:35:15 | |
But, if you're wrong, I'll wring your bloody neck. | 0:35:15 | 0:35:20 | |
No, Mummy will wring Daddy's bloody neck! | 0:35:20 | 0:35:24 | |
It's all right. I'll go. | 0:35:26 | 0:35:29 | |
Oh, hello. Sorry to interrupt your dressing. | 0:35:31 | 0:35:36 | |
I was just having a game... of cards. Oh, I see(!) | 0:35:36 | 0:35:42 | |
Would you care to have a game? I'm hardly dressed for it. | 0:35:42 | 0:35:47 | |
We'll soon get those off! No, thanks. I've come to see Vic. | 0:35:47 | 0:35:52 | |
If you'll excuse me, I must get back to it. | 0:35:52 | 0:35:57 | |
-I thought I might find you back here. ..Here's your trousers. -Oh, thanks a lot. | 0:35:57 | 0:36:04 | |
-They'll be very useful, they will, in case my legs row and split up(!) -YOU told me to follow that car! | 0:36:05 | 0:36:13 | |
-Did you? -What? -Follow the car! | 0:36:13 | 0:36:15 | |
-Yeah! I stuck to them like a limpet. -Where did they go? -Into a cinema. | 0:36:15 | 0:36:21 | |
-Right, come on! -If we hurry, we can make the 2nd half of the game. | 0:36:21 | 0:36:26 | |
We're NOT going to the football! | 0:36:26 | 0:36:28 | |
CLANG! | 0:36:30 | 0:36:33 | |
-Is this the wonderfully interesting film? -No, it's the one after this. | 0:36:34 | 0:36:40 | |
'Women are busily engaged in peeling vegetables and cutting up the meat. | 0:36:40 | 0:36:48 | |
'To do this they use knives | 0:36:48 | 0:36:51 | |
'and other kitchen implements. | 0:36:51 | 0:36:53 | |
'Let us watch their nimble fingers at work. | 0:36:54 | 0:36:59 | |
'Few white people have seen this.' | 0:36:59 | 0:37:01 | |
Blimey, how much more of this? | 0:37:01 | 0:37:04 | |
Why don't you stop moaning? | 0:37:04 | 0:37:07 | |
That's choice! We miss the football and pay 6 bob to watch idiots make Irish stew. | 0:37:07 | 0:37:14 | |
'We bid farewell to Kuku Island.' | 0:37:14 | 0:37:17 | |
-He's got his arm round her now. -Who? -Lewis! | 0:37:17 | 0:37:21 | |
MANAGER: The next film was refused a certificate by the Film Censors. | 0:37:21 | 0:37:28 | |
< The Council agreed to a showing. That sounds better! | 0:37:28 | 0:37:32 | |
Ssssh! | 0:37:32 | 0:37:35 | |
I am a well-known and practising doctor. | 0:37:35 | 0:37:38 | |
In the artistic picture which follows | 0:37:38 | 0:37:42 | |
you will see naked men and women engaged in the arts of sexual love. | 0:37:42 | 0:37:47 | |
This is not intended to shock, but to demonstrate that the sexual act | 0:37:47 | 0:37:54 | |
far from being something to fear... | 0:37:54 | 0:37:56 | |
is a great joy and pleasure which can, and indeed should, be enjoyed by everyone. | 0:37:56 | 0:38:03 | |
Let us familiarise ourselves with the component parts of the male body. | 0:38:03 | 0:38:09 | |
And this...the female body. | 0:38:11 | 0:38:13 | |
God, you don't miss a trick, do you? | 0:38:13 | 0:38:17 | |
Cor! | 0:38:18 | 0:38:19 | |
-No, wait, Myrtle, please! -CRASH | 0:38:21 | 0:38:25 | |
-Come on, they're leaving. -Eh? -Come on! -Oh no, not NOW. | 0:38:25 | 0:38:30 | |
Let us look at the different ways the two can be brought together. | 0:38:31 | 0:38:36 | |
Move! Come on. | 0:38:36 | 0:38:38 | |
Oh, NO. | 0:38:38 | 0:38:41 | |
CLANG! | 0:38:44 | 0:38:47 | |
COMMENTATOR: 'That's the line-up for the last race at Doncaster. | 0:38:48 | 0:38:55 | |
-'Result of the 4.30 at Kempton - First, Peewit The Third...' -He did it! Benny, £1 each way 10-1. | 0:38:55 | 0:39:03 | |
Got yourself a good win, eh, Sidney? Congratulations. | 0:39:03 | 0:39:07 | |
-(They've finished eating.) -That makes me feel a lot better(!) -What's wrong? | 0:39:34 | 0:39:40 | |
Stone me! You drag me away from the match, out of the cinema, | 0:39:40 | 0:39:45 | |
you drag me to watch them stuffing themselves, then ask what's wrong? | 0:39:45 | 0:39:50 | |
-You didn't have to come out with me. -And I can't wait not to come out with you tomorrow either. | 0:39:50 | 0:39:57 | |
-I'm not watching him having it away with Myrtle. -Why not? | 0:39:57 | 0:40:02 | |
-I didn't know it was going to be THAT sort of a film. -What a day! | 0:40:02 | 0:40:07 | |
It just needs Dad to walk in now! | 0:40:07 | 0:40:11 | |
-What's he got against me? -Plenty, apart from you being the boss's son. | 0:40:11 | 0:40:16 | |
-Is that so bad? -You should hear him! -What makes him think I want to marry you? | 0:40:16 | 0:40:23 | |
He doesn't. He had you weighed up right away. | 0:40:23 | 0:40:27 | |
-"I know all about blokes like Mr Lewis." -Oh... | 0:40:27 | 0:40:31 | |
-Yes? -Oh...a couple of those, please. | 0:40:31 | 0:40:34 | |
Em...I mean, THESE, please. | 0:40:34 | 0:40:37 | |
If I were you I'd have stuck to your first request. | 0:40:37 | 0:40:41 | |
I fancy the fellah with the ears! | 0:40:41 | 0:40:45 | |
-Did you see that waitress? Was that real? -Yeah. The only qualifications needed for the job - big prospects. | 0:40:45 | 0:40:53 | |
In some places they're totally topless. | 0:40:53 | 0:40:56 | |
-Nothing? -Not a stitch. -That's tricky when they're serving soup! -And frying chips! | 0:40:56 | 0:41:03 | |
If I say I'm sorry about the film, and about being the boss's son, could we start again? | 0:41:05 | 0:41:12 | |
-And about being on the make with me? -From now on, just good friends? -I'll drink to that! | 0:41:12 | 0:41:19 | |
Is a dance within the rules? | 0:41:21 | 0:41:23 | |
Yeah. Provided there's no dirty work in the clinches! | 0:41:23 | 0:41:28 | |
-He's got her on the floor. -In front of everybody? | 0:41:30 | 0:41:34 | |
-Sorry. Lewis! -Hello, Roger. | 0:41:41 | 0:41:43 | |
-Sorry I was put out when you called. -It's OK. -But you can use the flat tonight. | 0:41:43 | 0:41:49 | |
ROGER LAUGHS You bastard! | 0:41:49 | 0:41:53 | |
Wait, Myrtle, please. | 0:41:53 | 0:41:55 | |
Aaah! | 0:41:55 | 0:41:57 | |
Thank you, Joey. | 0:42:15 | 0:42:17 | |
I don't seem to have seen anything of young Mr Lewis, have you, Bern? | 0:42:27 | 0:42:33 | |
No, he's away. That's what you... | 0:42:33 | 0:42:37 | |
That was two weeks ago. I wondered if he'd left us. Have you heard anything? | 0:42:37 | 0:42:43 | |
I couldn't care less what's happened to him. | 0:42:43 | 0:42:47 | |
-Nearly dropped me in it. -Is it a secret? | 0:42:47 | 0:42:51 | |
-Sitting down on the job again? -Nothing in the rule book states I cannot do my job sitting down. | 0:42:51 | 0:42:58 | |
-Bet you say that to all the girls. -If you want to bring a charge... -No, relax. Go slow. Work to rule. | 0:42:58 | 0:43:06 | |
There you are. Have a smoke as well. | 0:43:06 | 0:43:09 | |
-I'm sorry to have kept you waiting, Fred. Come on. -< Come in. | 0:43:09 | 0:43:15 | |
-Hello, Dad. -Lewis, I didn't know you were back! | 0:43:16 | 0:43:21 | |
We've got the Middle East contract. | 0:43:21 | 0:43:24 | |
If I say so, it was done in the face of stiff competition. Very stiff! | 0:43:24 | 0:43:29 | |
-Signed by His Highness King Frowsi of Aslam himself. -Another crowned head to add to our clientele. | 0:43:29 | 0:43:37 | |
-What's it for? -Bidets. | 0:43:37 | 0:43:40 | |
-Bidets! -1,000 of them. | 0:43:40 | 0:43:42 | |
One...thousand...bidets!! | 0:43:42 | 0:43:45 | |
One for each of his wives. No favouritism. | 0:43:46 | 0:43:49 | |
-Are you mad? We do not make bidets. -High time we started. You sign it. | 0:43:49 | 0:43:55 | |
My firm will not be associated with manufacturing such a dubious article. | 0:43:55 | 0:44:00 | |
It's worth nineteen thousand pounds. | 0:44:00 | 0:44:03 | |
I don't c... | 0:44:04 | 0:44:06 | |
£19,000! That's an awful lot of money. | 0:44:07 | 0:44:11 | |
-Payment? -Once the order is ready in two months. | 0:44:11 | 0:44:14 | |
..Two months?! | 0:44:14 | 0:44:17 | |
-That was the only snag. -They need them for the Feast of Abanibel. | 0:44:17 | 0:44:22 | |
Abanibel? | 0:44:22 | 0:44:24 | |
It's His Highness's custom to visit each of his wives in turn. | 0:44:24 | 0:44:29 | |
-It only happens once a year. -I'm not surprised. | 0:44:30 | 0:44:33 | |
We couldn't possibly complete such an order in two months. We haven't even got a design! | 0:44:33 | 0:44:40 | |
-Mr Coote did one months ago. Now, sign. -I feel I'm going into something...I shall regret. | 0:44:40 | 0:44:49 | |
-You're looking well this morning. -Thanks, Doctor. Can I get dressed? -Yes, while I put my eyes back in. | 0:44:50 | 0:44:58 | |
-Another new suit? -I was lucky on the gee-gees. -You must give me a tip. | 0:44:58 | 0:45:03 | |
Don't bend over in a tight skirt. | 0:45:03 | 0:45:06 | |
Saucy! | 0:45:06 | 0:45:08 | |
Refused you a bridging loan for a measly 1,500? | 0:45:09 | 0:45:14 | |
-It's true. The bank has been carrying us for some years. -And now they're dropping us. | 0:45:14 | 0:45:21 | |
-It seems so. We'll have to get out of that contract. -How much do you need? -A thousand would do. | 0:45:21 | 0:45:28 | |
-Is that all? Don't bother with banks. I'll let you have that. -YOU can? -Yeah, I can get it. | 0:45:28 | 0:45:36 | |
-We've got an hour till the last race at Cheltenham. -Last race?! -Yeah. I have to see a bird first. | 0:45:36 | 0:45:43 | |
A bird! At Cheltenham? | 0:45:43 | 0:45:45 | |
-You promised me you'd limit it to two bets a week so he didn't overstrain himself. -Don't argue. | 0:45:45 | 0:45:53 | |
-Read out the runners. -All right. But don't blame me if nothing happens. | 0:45:53 | 0:45:59 | |
It's nothing to do with me, Joey. | 0:45:59 | 0:46:03 | |
I'm not the greedy one. | 0:46:03 | 0:46:06 | |
All right? Here we go, then. | 0:46:06 | 0:46:09 | |
Four-thirty at Cheltenham. | 0:46:09 | 0:46:12 | |
"Bog. Girlie. | 0:46:12 | 0:46:14 | |
"Hard To Get. | 0:46:14 | 0:46:17 | |
"Order Form. | 0:46:17 | 0:46:20 | |
"Proper Charlie. | 0:46:20 | 0:46:22 | |
"Sweet Sue." JOEY CHIRPS | 0:46:22 | 0:46:24 | |
That's the one. | 0:46:24 | 0:46:27 | |
-What's the betting? -18-1. -That'll do. | 0:46:29 | 0:46:33 | |
18-1 Sweet Sue. Fifty six pounds win bet. | 0:46:34 | 0:46:39 | |
That's exactly one thousand and twenty-six pounds! | 0:46:39 | 0:46:44 | |
-That's what I make it. -Pints of blood I'm giving. -You'll get it back. | 0:46:44 | 0:46:49 | |
-I've had a heart attack from paying it out. -I don't like doing this. | 0:46:49 | 0:46:55 | |
-I -don't like doing this either. Why do we go on suffering? | 0:46:55 | 0:47:00 | |
-Just 'cos I've had a bit of luck for a change. -For a change, he says! | 0:47:00 | 0:47:06 | |
Look at this. In the last 3 weeks eleven winning bets you've had! | 0:47:06 | 0:47:11 | |
Two thousand four hundred and thirty three pounds. | 0:47:11 | 0:47:15 | |
YOU have taken from ME. | 0:47:15 | 0:47:17 | |
-Tomorrow, I'll bet the lot on a long... -No, Sid, it's finished. | 0:47:18 | 0:47:23 | |
-Finished? -There's a limit on you. £5. | 0:47:24 | 0:47:27 | |
What kind of sportsman ARE you? | 0:47:27 | 0:47:29 | |
If I was a sportsman I'd be riding the horses. | 0:47:29 | 0:47:34 | |
Mr Coote, please show my father your bidet design. | 0:47:37 | 0:47:41 | |
By all means. I have it right here. | 0:47:41 | 0:47:44 | |
Yes, if anyone has any use for this sort of thing. What's the cost? | 0:47:44 | 0:47:49 | |
After basic outlay on a new mould and so on...about £7 each. | 0:47:49 | 0:47:54 | |
On this contract it could be worth over 100% profit. | 0:47:54 | 0:47:57 | |
He's hit on a labour-saving idea. | 0:47:57 | 0:48:01 | |
It's quite simple. Instead of the conventional hot and cold taps and waste control tap, | 0:48:01 | 0:48:08 | |
the whole thing can be done by one simple control. | 0:48:08 | 0:48:12 | |
Hot...Cold...Down the hole. | 0:48:12 | 0:48:16 | |
Drop everything! | 0:48:44 | 0:48:46 | |
Cut the switches. | 0:48:50 | 0:48:53 | |
SILENCE | 0:48:53 | 0:48:56 | |
Blimey, now what's happened? | 0:49:03 | 0:49:05 | |
Excuse me. | 0:49:05 | 0:49:07 | |
LOUD ARGUING | 0:49:07 | 0:49:10 | |
All right! All right! What's the hold up? | 0:49:13 | 0:49:17 | |
-ALL TALK TOGETHER -One at a time. | 0:49:17 | 0:49:21 | |
These men cannot put this fitting onto those things. | 0:49:21 | 0:49:25 | |
Am I right that this is a combined tap and waste-pipe control? | 0:49:25 | 0:49:30 | |
-Yes. -Whose job is it to fit it? | 0:49:30 | 0:49:32 | |
-Ernie can do it, can't you? -Of course. | 0:49:33 | 0:49:36 | |
No, because Ernie is a tap fitter. | 0:49:36 | 0:49:39 | |
-Willie can do it. -No. Willie is a waste-pipe fitter. | 0:49:39 | 0:49:43 | |
-They can both do it. -No. Because if one does it, he's doing the other's job. | 0:49:43 | 0:49:50 | |
-What of it if they're both working? -That's what I said. | 0:49:50 | 0:49:54 | |
You don't have a say. This is union business. | 0:49:54 | 0:49:58 | |
-It's our union. -And you'll do as it tells you. | 0:49:58 | 0:50:02 | |
-Under a redundancy agreement... -But we're not making anybody redundant. | 0:50:02 | 0:50:08 | |
-These men are doing two jobs in the same time. -What's your solution? | 0:50:08 | 0:50:14 | |
-It's not the Union's job to give solutions. -Exactly. | 0:50:14 | 0:50:19 | |
If you was to make two separate fittings... | 0:50:19 | 0:50:23 | |
-That basin was made for that one fitting. -Typical! Immediately they make difficulties. | 0:50:23 | 0:50:30 | |
Suppose they work together? Ernie connects it to the inlet pipe, Willie connects it to the outlet. | 0:50:30 | 0:50:38 | |
You've still got two jobs being done in the same time. | 0:50:38 | 0:50:42 | |
-It's like a man working in half the time. -Well? | 0:50:42 | 0:50:47 | |
-Every worker doing his job in half the time would soon mess up the country. -You can't bring 'em out! | 0:50:47 | 0:50:54 | |
-Until I acquaint the Union General Secretary with the facts, you leave me no alternative. -Everybody out! | 0:50:54 | 0:51:02 | |
Keep your line moving. | 0:51:14 | 0:51:16 | |
Messrs Wade Ceramics, Ltd. Dear Sirs, With reference to our meeting last January, | 0:51:26 | 0:51:33 | |
when you expressed an interest in taking over this business, I must now advise you | 0:51:33 | 0:51:40 | |
that I am in a position to consider a favourable offer. | 0:51:40 | 0:51:45 | |
No! I beg your pardon, Miss Withering? | 0:51:45 | 0:51:48 | |
I can't let you give up. This strike has finished us. | 0:51:48 | 0:51:52 | |
What about me? I've given my life to Boggs. | 0:51:52 | 0:51:56 | |
You shall be taken over with the firm. | 0:51:56 | 0:52:00 | |
I don't want that. I want to carry on with you. | 0:52:00 | 0:52:04 | |
I do appreciate your loyalty... | 0:52:04 | 0:52:07 | |
No, you don't! You've NEVER appreciated me. | 0:52:07 | 0:52:11 | |
WHAT? I've worked for you 30 years. | 0:52:11 | 0:52:13 | |
Have you ever sat me on your knee, or asked me to go away a weekend? | 0:52:13 | 0:52:19 | |
Miss Withering! | 0:52:19 | 0:52:21 | |
You've never EVEN pinched my bottom. | 0:52:21 | 0:52:24 | |
I am NOT the habit of interfering with other people's seating arrangements. Now, the dictation. | 0:52:24 | 0:52:31 | |
Oh, DAMN the dictation! | 0:52:31 | 0:52:34 | |
I'm not going to watch you throw everything away. You're pressing on my keys. | 0:52:34 | 0:52:41 | |
William, fight back. I'll be at your side. I'll work for nothing. We can do it together. | 0:52:41 | 0:52:47 | |
I don't want us to do it together. You've lost confidence. | 0:52:47 | 0:52:53 | |
All you need is a good prod! | 0:52:53 | 0:52:56 | |
I assure you, that is the last thing I need. Lean on me. We'll see it through. | 0:52:56 | 0:53:02 | |
-Talk about the "Power Game"! -Ohhh! | 0:53:05 | 0:53:09 | |
-I'm sorry we barged in on you. I had no idea you and she were... -We weren't! And we NEVER have. | 0:53:11 | 0:53:18 | |
She was upset. After all, she's not getting any younger. | 0:53:18 | 0:53:23 | |
-She's not getting ANY. -Yes, well. What about the Union? | 0:53:23 | 0:53:27 | |
-No luck. The Action Committee's gone off to Russia! -Oh well, I suppose that's that. | 0:53:27 | 0:53:35 | |
-Why aren't there pickets on the gate? -Probably on strike. | 0:53:35 | 0:53:39 | |
Dad, look! | 0:53:39 | 0:53:42 | |
I can't believe it! > | 0:53:45 | 0:53:48 | |
-They're coming back. -I thought they would today. -Why today? -The annual works' outing. | 0:53:50 | 0:53:57 | |
-We'd better get ready. -Ready? For what? | 0:54:01 | 0:54:04 | |
-You're not going with them? -I am, my boy. -But, why? -Because I've decided, after all these years, | 0:54:04 | 0:54:11 | |
what I've been missing is a good booze-up. | 0:54:11 | 0:54:15 | |
-No Fred, then? -No, he's off on another sales trip. | 0:54:23 | 0:54:28 | |
Tsk! What a pity. Today of ALL days. | 0:54:28 | 0:54:31 | |
-I spent half the night trying to talk him into having it off. -I wouldn't have needed persuading. | 0:54:31 | 0:54:39 | |
-I shall be very happy to look after you today. -Oh, ta. | 0:54:39 | 0:54:44 | |
Mr Plummer's offered to look after us. | 0:54:44 | 0:54:48 | |
-Oooh, that'll be lovely, -Pleasure(!) | 0:54:48 | 0:54:52 | |
It's not much fun without a man. | 0:54:52 | 0:54:55 | |
-You should know. -Ooh! | 0:54:55 | 0:54:58 | |
You've never done it before? | 0:55:01 | 0:55:03 | |
No. Have you? Oh, loads of times. | 0:55:03 | 0:55:07 | |
What's it like? Vic arranges it all. | 0:55:07 | 0:55:10 | |
We get to Brighton about 12 o'clock, then we have a slap-up meal. | 0:55:10 | 0:55:15 | |
What do we do after? | 0:55:15 | 0:55:18 | |
We can do anything once we're there. | 0:55:18 | 0:55:21 | |
Go on the pier, eat winkles, throw stones. | 0:55:21 | 0:55:24 | |
To be frank, Mr Coote, I've never tried it. Really? | 0:55:24 | 0:55:29 | |
You've certainly missed something. | 0:55:29 | 0:55:32 | |
I'm always ready to learn. Oh, well... | 0:55:32 | 0:55:35 | |
It's difficult to show you here, but I can tell you how it's played. | 0:55:35 | 0:55:40 | |
You deal out five cards to each person. | 0:55:40 | 0:55:44 | |
I can't think why I didn't notice you at the factory before. | 0:55:45 | 0:55:50 | |
It was a strike my first day. I had to work 3 weeks! | 0:55:50 | 0:55:55 | |
-I'm on my own today, you know. -So I gathered, yes. | 0:55:58 | 0:56:02 | |
-Why lumber yourself with a bird, going to Brighton? It's like taking coals to Newcastle. -If you say so. | 0:56:02 | 0:56:09 | |
The place is full of spare. Last time we had to fight them off. Like flies they were. | 0:56:09 | 0:56:16 | |
Some people attract them. Just like dustbins. | 0:56:16 | 0:56:21 | |
Yeah. Yeah, I suppose so. | 0:56:21 | 0:56:23 | |
If you're going to be on your own I wouldn't mind showing you around. | 0:56:23 | 0:56:28 | |
Thanks, but I don't think you should disappoint those flies! | 0:56:28 | 0:56:33 | |
CAR HORN BLOWS | 0:56:44 | 0:56:47 | |
'Course I'd love to spend the day with YOU, Vic. | 0:57:02 | 0:57:06 | |
-Would you? -Yeah. -Oh well, that's all right, then. | 0:57:06 | 0:57:10 | |
-Come on, boys and girls, this is where we're supposed to have lunch. -Lunchtime! | 0:57:33 | 0:57:40 | |
Morning. | 0:57:53 | 0:57:55 | |
Morning, we are the Boggs and Sons outing. | 0:57:55 | 0:57:59 | |
I'm sorry, but we can't do you lunch. | 0:57:59 | 0:58:03 | |
-I'm starving! -What? But I booked it six weeks ago. | 0:58:03 | 0:58:08 | |
I'm sorry, but our entire restaurant staff has gone on strike. | 0:58:08 | 0:58:12 | |
-They can't be! -Listen to who's talking. | 0:58:12 | 0:58:16 | |
The bar's open and there are cold snacks. | 0:58:16 | 0:58:19 | |
-Who do they think they are? -A bunch of down-trodden workers | 0:58:19 | 0:58:24 | |
being exploited by management. | 0:58:24 | 0:58:29 | |
What's it matter? A drink will do me. | 0:58:29 | 0:58:31 | |
Hear! Hear! The drinks are on me. | 0:58:31 | 0:58:34 | |
-This way, sir, please. -I won't let them get away with it! Taking bread out of the poor workers' mouths. | 0:58:34 | 0:58:42 | |
-But there's nothing we can do. -No. Yes, there is! I'm not being pushed round by anarchists! | 0:58:42 | 0:58:49 | |
Come on! | 0:58:49 | 0:58:51 | |
Ah. Hey, you! | 0:58:51 | 0:58:54 | |
-What's all this about you lot being on strike? -Yes, we are. | 0:58:54 | 0:58:59 | |
What about it, then? | 0:58:59 | 0:59:01 | |
Tell him, Bernie. | 0:59:01 | 0:59:04 | |
- You're taking the bread out of workers' mouths. - Oh? | 0:59:04 | 0:59:09 | |
- You're a bunch of anarchists. - Really? Who says so? | 0:59:09 | 0:59:14 | |
He does. | 0:59:14 | 0:59:16 | |
There you are, Mr Spanner. In time for your drink. | 0:59:19 | 0:59:24 | |
Ah, there you are, Vic. | 0:59:24 | 0:59:26 | |
Well, we certainly told him, didn't we? | 0:59:26 | 0:59:30 | |
# She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes. | 0:59:31 | 0:59:36 | |
# She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes... # | 0:59:36 | 0:59:40 | |
Myrtle, listen to me. | 0:59:40 | 0:59:43 | |
-Please stop bothering me. -No, I won't! | 0:59:43 | 0:59:47 | |
-You heard Myrt, so buzz off! -Move or I'll knock your head off. -Yes? | 0:59:47 | 0:59:52 | |
-Yes! -Bernie! | 0:59:52 | 0:59:55 | |
-Mr Lewis, we don't want no trouble. -No? | 0:59:55 | 0:59:58 | |
-Who's going to stop it then? -Me. -All right, go on, try it. | 0:59:58 | 1:00:03 | |
Don't say I didn't warn you. | 1:00:03 | 1:00:05 | |
-Now you've REALLY done it! -For God's sake. | 1:00:10 | 1:00:14 | |
Gosh, I AM sorry, Vic. Are you all right? | 1:00:15 | 1:00:19 | |
# Yippie, aye, aye, yippie Aye, aye, yippie | 1:00:19 | 1:00:23 | |
# Aye, aye, yippie, yippie, aye! # | 1:00:23 | 1:00:27 | |
Oh, splendid! Splendid! Let's have more drinks. | 1:00:28 | 1:00:32 | |
-Let's go for a walk. There's a smashing front here. -There's a smashing one there too! | 1:00:32 | 1:00:40 | |
-Let's go on the pier and have a winkle. -You can have one through that door. | 1:00:40 | 1:00:46 | |
No, let's go on the pier! | 1:00:46 | 1:00:48 | |
Come on, Myrt, come on! | 1:01:01 | 1:01:04 | |
We have a lot of conferences down here. | 1:01:05 | 1:01:09 | |
There's nothing to it. I'll show you. | 1:01:20 | 1:01:24 | |
It looks quite easy. Let's all have a go. | 1:01:34 | 1:01:38 | |
Oy! Watch it! | 1:01:42 | 1:01:44 | |
Come on then. | 1:02:00 | 1:02:03 | |
Skinheads! | 1:02:05 | 1:02:07 | |
That showed him. | 1:02:07 | 1:02:10 | |
Ah! | 1:02:10 | 1:02:12 | |
There's something I want to have a go at. | 1:02:12 | 1:02:16 | |
Hold it perfectly still. I'll take it... | 1:02:22 | 1:02:26 | |
NOW. | 1:02:26 | 1:02:28 | |
How was that? | 1:02:28 | 1:02:31 | |
Beautiful, Bern, beautiful. | 1:02:31 | 1:02:34 | |
-Come on, Vic, let's have a go on the mat. -In front of everybody? | 1:02:34 | 1:02:39 | |
Oh, the helter-skelter? | 1:02:39 | 1:02:42 | |
Come on! | 1:02:42 | 1:02:44 | |
-You've had enough. You've got to have something to eat. -One moment. | 1:02:44 | 1:02:50 | |
There was a young fellow called Reg Who went with a girl in a hedge. | 1:02:50 | 1:02:55 | |
When along came his wife With a big carving knife And cut off his meat and two veg. | 1:02:55 | 1:03:02 | |
Yeee-hoo! | 1:03:06 | 1:03:08 | |
Ooooh! | 1:03:11 | 1:03:13 | |
Vic darling, I haven't had so much fun in all my life! Thanks. | 1:03:16 | 1:03:21 | |
< Ahhh! | 1:03:24 | 1:03:26 | |
# We are the champions. # | 1:03:26 | 1:03:29 | |
Oooh, what was that digging in me? Only my camera. | 1:03:29 | 1:03:34 | |
I've found a fortune-teller. Shall we try it? | 1:03:36 | 1:03:40 | |
Fortune teller! No! Waste of money. Fakes, that's all they are. Looking in their crystal what's-it. | 1:03:40 | 1:03:47 | |
-Balls. -I QUITE agree! Absolutely ridiculous. | 1:03:47 | 1:03:51 | |
-I don't mind having a go. I love them. -Let's have a bash. | 1:03:51 | 1:03:55 | |
Never mind, Miss Withering. Have a cockle. Much better for you. | 1:03:56 | 1:04:01 | |
Do you think I ought to? I've heard that shellfish do strange things - in a sex way, I mean. | 1:04:01 | 1:04:09 | |
Really? Oooh, let's watch 'em then! | 1:04:09 | 1:04:12 | |
-Anybody home? -Look. "Gone to lunch. Back in the near future." -The foreseeable future, I hope. | 1:04:16 | 1:04:24 | |
-We'll come back later. -Wait a minute. | 1:04:24 | 1:04:27 | |
I've got an idea. Hang on. | 1:04:28 | 1:04:31 | |
But I DON'T want my fortune told. I told you, I don't believe in it. | 1:04:40 | 1:04:45 | |
You will in this one. Go on, be a sport! All right, then. | 1:04:45 | 1:04:50 | |
Excuse me, dear. Customers. | 1:04:51 | 1:04:54 | |
I know, I saw you coming. | 1:04:54 | 1:04:57 | |
-I beg your pardon? -In the ball. You are indeed in need of help. Please be seated. | 1:04:57 | 1:05:03 | |
-Now then, do you wish me to prognosticate? -Please do. We'll wait. | 1:05:03 | 1:05:10 | |
-LAUGHS > -Please, I must have silence to establish contact. | 1:05:10 | 1:05:16 | |
Sssh. | 1:05:18 | 1:05:19 | |
Ah! The mists are clearing. | 1:05:20 | 1:05:23 | |
I see a picture forming. | 1:05:23 | 1:05:26 | |
All around you are strange looking objects. White and shining. | 1:05:26 | 1:05:32 | |
-Do lavatories play a big part in your life? -WHAT? Why, yes, they DO. | 1:05:32 | 1:05:39 | |
Yes. You are a cloakroom attendant. | 1:05:39 | 1:05:42 | |
Certainly not! I manufacture them! | 1:05:42 | 1:05:45 | |
I have a factory. | 1:05:45 | 1:05:47 | |
I see a picture of it. The factory is about to fall into ruins. | 1:05:47 | 1:05:52 | |
-No! -Unless... -What? | 1:05:52 | 1:05:55 | |
There is a woman who loves you. | 1:05:55 | 1:05:57 | |
Her name begins with...W. | 1:05:57 | 1:06:01 | |
-Is it Widdling? -Withering. Miss Withering. | 1:06:01 | 1:06:06 | |
That's it. Your affinities will be closely entwined. | 1:06:06 | 1:06:11 | |
Don't be disgusting! | 1:06:11 | 1:06:14 | |
I see...a marriage! | 1:06:14 | 1:06:17 | |
And one, two, three, fourteen children! | 1:06:17 | 1:06:21 | |
Oh no! No! | 1:06:21 | 1:06:23 | |
William, don't go. William, come back! | 1:06:24 | 1:06:28 | |
Not bad! | 1:06:30 | 1:06:32 | |
-Do you want to do me now? -Not 'alf. Let me get these things off first. | 1:06:32 | 1:06:38 | |
William! William, come back! | 1:06:45 | 1:06:48 | |
WILLIAM. | 1:06:48 | 1:06:51 | |
Excuse me. | 1:07:16 | 1:07:19 | |
WHISPERS | 1:07:19 | 1:07:21 | |
Aaaah! | 1:07:27 | 1:07:29 | |
Switch it off. My girl's in there. | 1:07:34 | 1:07:37 | |
Let me go! Let me GO! | 1:07:38 | 1:07:42 | |
-Not until you listen to what I've got to say. -Oh. | 1:07:42 | 1:07:46 | |
-Now, d'you see this? -NO, I don't! | 1:07:46 | 1:07:49 | |
-What is it anyway? -It's a Special Marriage Licence. -What? | 1:07:49 | 1:07:54 | |
-A Special Marriage Licence, my darling. Do we use it or tear it up? -Oh... | 1:07:54 | 1:08:01 | |
-Lewis. -..Darling. | 1:08:01 | 1:08:05 | |
Leave her alone! Put her down! | 1:08:12 | 1:08:15 | |
Excuse me a minute, darling. | 1:08:15 | 1:08:18 | |
THUMPS AND CRIES | 1:08:18 | 1:08:24 | |
-Blimey?! Where d'you think they've got to? -Search me. What happened to Myrtle? | 1:08:54 | 1:09:00 | |
-I don't know or care! -What's this? | 1:09:01 | 1:09:04 | |
BOGGS LAUGHS | 1:09:09 | 1:09:12 | |
-Oh, naughty! -Come on, ladies. Off you come. | 1:09:15 | 1:09:19 | |
-Looks like Fred's not home yet. No car. -He said he wouldn't be home till tomorrow night. -Shame, innit? | 1:11:53 | 1:12:02 | |
-Looks like Beattie's asleep. -Good. -Eh? -I mean, em...good for her. | 1:12:02 | 1:12:07 | |
Chlo! Oh, blimey, Chlo! | 1:12:08 | 1:12:11 | |
-Yes, Sid? -Nothing. | 1:12:11 | 1:12:14 | |
-I think we ought to go to bed, OUR beds, I mean. -Yeah, I suppose so. | 1:12:14 | 1:12:20 | |
-I would have liked to ask you in for a cup of tea. -Oh? -But you know how the neighbours talk. -Yeah. | 1:12:20 | 1:12:28 | |
-I suppose you couldn't come in with me at this time of night without someone seeing us. -No. | 1:12:28 | 1:12:35 | |
-Not that we'd be doing what they think. -Oh no! -If Fred did get to hear about it... | 1:12:35 | 1:12:41 | |
Yeah, quite right. Not worth it really. Not just for a cup of tea. Oh, well! | 1:12:41 | 1:12:48 | |
-Good night, Sid. -'Night. Sleep tight. | 1:12:58 | 1:13:01 | |
Tight's the word! | 1:13:01 | 1:13:04 | |
Bloody neighbours. | 1:13:04 | 1:13:06 | |
Mr Boggs! Tea. | 1:13:36 | 1:13:38 | |
W.C! Tea! | 1:13:41 | 1:13:43 | |
Thank you. | 1:13:43 | 1:13:46 | |
Very nice... Miss Withering, what are YOU doing here? | 1:13:46 | 1:13:51 | |
- This is my room, Mr Boggs. - Oh, I see. | 1:13:51 | 1:13:56 | |
-What?! Then what am -I -doing here? | 1:13:56 | 1:13:58 | |
You were in no fit state to look after yourself, so I had two of the men bring you up here. | 1:13:58 | 1:14:06 | |
Well, that was very thoughtful... I beg your pardon! I didn't realise they'd undressed me! | 1:14:06 | 1:14:13 | |
- They didn't. - ..You mean YOU...! | 1:14:13 | 1:14:18 | |
Don't worry. I know what a man looks like. | 1:14:18 | 1:14:22 | |
- You're not all THAT much different. - Miss Withering... | 1:14:22 | 1:14:28 | |
- Yes? - Did we get off... Did I get off to sleep? | 1:14:28 | 1:14:33 | |
- Don't you remember, William? - No, I don't. | 1:14:33 | 1:14:37 | |
That is something we shall always be wondering about...isn't it? | 1:14:37 | 1:14:42 | |
Charles! | 1:14:57 | 1:14:59 | |
CHARLES. Get up and come inside! | 1:14:59 | 1:15:04 | |
SNIFFS | 1:15:12 | 1:15:13 | |
You've been drinking! I had some bad news. | 1:15:13 | 1:15:18 | |
I don't give a damn! I married one drunk and I'm NOT marrying another! | 1:15:18 | 1:15:24 | |
That was the bad news. | 1:15:24 | 1:15:26 | |
We won't be able to get married. | 1:15:26 | 1:15:29 | |
What d'you mean? | 1:15:29 | 1:15:31 | |
Mr Boggs is going to close down the works. | 1:15:31 | 1:15:35 | |
Close them? Why? | 1:15:35 | 1:15:37 | |
Because of the strike. I knew it. It's that little sod Victor's fault. | 1:15:37 | 1:15:43 | |
I'm not going to let that little swine mess up my bloody life. | 1:15:43 | 1:15:48 | |
We have got to keep a full picket-line today, | 1:15:48 | 1:15:52 | |
-because I hear some of the men want to come back! -Oh, do they? | 1:15:52 | 1:15:57 | |
-If they want to, how are we going to stop 'em? -Force. Whatever happens we have got to stand firm. | 1:15:58 | 1:16:05 | |
Can I have the cricket bat? I can't play tennis. | 1:16:13 | 1:16:18 | |
PHONE RINGS | 1:16:22 | 1:16:24 | |
It's all right, William. Thank you, Miss Withering. | 1:16:26 | 1:16:30 | |
Now, William! I beg your pardon. Hortense. That's better. | 1:16:30 | 1:16:36 | |
Boggs and Son. Mr Boggs' personal secretary speaking. | 1:16:36 | 1:16:41 | |
Oh, Mr Lewis. Yes, he's here. | 1:16:41 | 1:16:43 | |
Hello, Lewis, my boy. I apologise for not getting home last night. I got laid up...I mean, held up. | 1:16:43 | 1:16:51 | |
I was going to say the same to you. | 1:16:51 | 1:16:53 | |
No, no, there's nothing wrong. Far from it. | 1:16:53 | 1:16:58 | |
The fact is, I got married. | 1:16:58 | 1:17:00 | |
..Married! | 1:17:00 | 1:17:02 | |
That's right. To Myrtle Plummer. | 1:17:02 | 1:17:05 | |
That'll surprise her father! | 1:17:05 | 1:17:08 | |
I HAD to marry her. | 1:17:08 | 1:17:10 | |
No, no, no, I mean it was the only way. | 1:17:11 | 1:17:15 | |
-We booked into a hotel. We've been driving all night and want to get to bed. -"At long last" he says. | 1:17:15 | 1:17:24 | |
You can say that again. Not you, Dad! | 1:17:24 | 1:17:28 | |
-You won't mind if I don't come back to work for a few days? -Not at all! | 1:17:28 | 1:17:33 | |
I'm taking up Moore's offer for the firm. | 1:17:33 | 1:17:37 | |
Thanks. I knew you... You've WHAT? Dad, you can't do THAT, Dad! | 1:17:37 | 1:17:43 | |
RECEIVER REPLACED | 1:17:43 | 1:17:45 | |
Oh no, no. | 1:17:45 | 1:17:47 | |
I've got to stop him. | 1:17:47 | 1:17:50 | |
Well, here I am at long last, darling. | 1:17:53 | 1:17:57 | |
Get dressed as quickly as you can. | 1:18:00 | 1:18:02 | |
-What? -We've got to get back! | 1:18:03 | 1:18:05 | |
-Something important's come up. -Won't it keep? | 1:18:05 | 1:18:09 | |
Oh, I DO hope it will! | 1:18:09 | 1:18:12 | |
-Excuse me, W.C., have you seen my daughter this morning? -Em...no. | 1:18:15 | 1:18:20 | |
-She left Brighton with your son and hasn't been home all night. -Myrtle has always commanded respect. | 1:18:20 | 1:18:28 | |
-I'm sure Lewis will see she gets it. -That's what I'm afraid of! | 1:18:28 | 1:18:33 | |
-Now, listen... -< RAISED VOICES -What's that? | 1:18:33 | 1:18:37 | |
Let's see. | 1:18:37 | 1:18:39 | |
Looks like a show-down. | 1:18:41 | 1:18:43 | |
Listen! We are on official strike pending confirmation. | 1:18:43 | 1:18:48 | |
Until then there will be NO return to work. | 1:18:48 | 1:18:52 | |
What's the point if it means Boggs will close down? | 1:18:52 | 1:18:56 | |
That is not the point, Brother, so why don't you...stop making trouble? | 1:18:56 | 1:19:02 | |
All WE want to do is an honest day's work! | 1:19:02 | 1:19:06 | |
"All we want...!" Bolshie talk like that got this country in the mess it's in today. | 1:19:06 | 1:19:14 | |
The last thing we want is violence so at the first sign of anything | 1:19:14 | 1:19:19 | |
don't argue, don't get involved... bash 'em! | 1:19:19 | 1:19:23 | |
Well, we might as well go home. | 1:19:23 | 1:19:26 | |
-I don't reckon we'll have any more trouble. -I don't know about that. Just look at this lot! | 1:19:26 | 1:19:33 | |
Blimey, my old woman's there! And mine! | 1:19:36 | 1:19:40 | |
-Stop! -Mum, what are you doing here? -I've come to knock some commonsense into you! | 1:19:46 | 1:19:52 | |
-Mum, not in front of everyone! -You're ashamed. As you should be! | 1:19:52 | 1:19:57 | |
Shift your arse and let these people in to work! | 1:19:57 | 1:20:01 | |
Ladies, this strike is quite legitimate. | 1:20:01 | 1:20:04 | |
That's more than they say about you! | 1:20:04 | 1:20:08 | |
I must ask you all to disperse peacefully. | 1:20:08 | 1:20:12 | |
Disperse, crap! Are you going to MOVE? | 1:20:12 | 1:20:16 | |
-We must stand firm on our principles. -Oh, yeah? -It is the worker's democratic right | 1:20:16 | 1:20:23 | |
-to do whatever he likes. -Shut up! -It is the democratic... -Shut up and give me that, you squirt! | 1:20:23 | 1:20:30 | |
I should have done this years ago. | 1:20:32 | 1:20:35 | |
OW! Ow. | 1:20:35 | 1:20:36 | |
Will somebody open those damn gates? | 1:20:42 | 1:20:45 | |
Thank you, ladies. | 1:20:58 | 1:21:00 | |
We thought you might need extra help. We want to come back to work. | 1:21:00 | 1:21:06 | |
I really appreciate this moving gesture. Such a wonderful display of loyalty. | 1:21:06 | 1:21:12 | |
Cut the cackle and let's get on with the work! | 1:21:13 | 1:21:17 | |
-Well done, Beattie, you can go home now. -But I thought I'd stay on. Make a change for me. | 1:21:18 | 1:21:25 | |
-Stay on? -Yeah. -Oh, all right then, come on. | 1:21:25 | 1:21:29 | |
Come on! | 1:21:31 | 1:21:33 | |
-Brothers, you're not going to let a bunch of women tell you what to do? -Don't they always? | 1:21:33 | 1:21:40 | |
Don't let's give in like this. Be firm. Make a stand. Has it all been for nothing? | 1:21:40 | 1:21:47 | |
-Bernie, DO something! -I don't know about YOU blokes, but I'm not going to let any woman take MY job! | 1:21:47 | 1:21:55 | |
Now, then, come on, let's get back to work. | 1:21:55 | 1:21:58 | |
Go back to work, but don't expect me to join you! Nothing on earth would get me back in. | 1:21:58 | 1:22:05 | |
Nothing on earth, I tell you! | 1:22:05 | 1:22:08 | |
Excuse me, but they sent me from the Exchange. I'm the new canteen girl. | 1:22:19 | 1:22:26 | |
-Can you tell me where I go? -Yes, I'll show you where it is. | 1:22:26 | 1:22:31 | |
We've got a lovely pair of canteens here. | 1:22:31 | 1:22:35 | |
What's going on? | 1:22:50 | 1:22:53 | |
Oooh! | 1:22:57 | 1:22:59 | |
-Chlo, about last night, when you asked me in for tea? -What about it? | 1:22:59 | 1:23:06 | |
I wanted it BADLY. The tea, I mean. | 1:23:06 | 1:23:09 | |
-It's a bit late for that now. -No, there must be another chance. Next year? Even sooner, perhaps? | 1:23:09 | 1:23:17 | |
Hello, Beattie. | 1:23:17 | 1:23:20 | |
-Getting on all right, then? -YES. I think I might take a job here. | 1:23:21 | 1:23:26 | |
-You'll what? -Seems more sensible than talking to a bird all day. | 1:23:26 | 1:23:31 | |
There's no harm in talking to a bird. | 1:23:31 | 1:23:35 | |
Well, you should know. Here you are. | 1:23:35 | 1:23:38 | |
And I could come on the outings with you. | 1:23:38 | 1:23:42 | |
Yes...that's right. | 1:23:42 | 1:23:45 | |
-What do you want? -Eh...well, I'm still employed here, aren't I? | 1:23:52 | 1:23:57 | |
-Unless YOU want to fire me. -Supposing I did? -That'd be victimisation. -..Get working! | 1:23:57 | 1:24:04 | |
-But I want it understood, I'm only doing so under protest. -Knickers! | 1:24:04 | 1:24:10 | |
FLUSHING OF TOILET | 1:24:11 | 1:24:14 | |
-Better now, Maudie? -Oh! Oooh, Mr Plummer! | 1:24:14 | 1:24:18 | |
-Myrtle, where the hell have you been? -It's all right, we're married. | 1:24:20 | 1:24:26 | |
-Married? -Yes. I hope you don't object, Dad. | 1:24:26 | 1:24:30 | |
-Dad?! My daughter marries into management and you ask if I object? I DO! -But you're management too. | 1:24:30 | 1:24:38 | |
How dare you insult me like that! I'M Works Foreman. | 1:24:38 | 1:24:42 | |
-Didn't Dad tell you? -What? -In return for the financial help he's making you a director. | 1:24:42 | 1:24:49 | |
-Director? -Yes. -Oh, NO! I'm a worker. I don't want to sit on my fat... | 1:24:49 | 1:24:55 | |
-Come on, Lewis, we better go. -I'll kill that bloody budgie! | 1:24:55 | 1:25:01 | |
-Here, Vic, there's no paper in that loo. -What was that, Bern? | 1:25:02 | 1:25:07 | |
-I just said, there's no paper in that toilet again. -There's a situation. | 1:25:07 | 1:25:13 | |
-Bernie. -Yep. -Don't just stand there. | 1:25:14 | 1:25:17 | |
-I know... -Nip out and buy a couple of rolls. -Good lad! | 1:25:17 | 1:25:23 | |
Come on, don't hang about. Carry on working. | 1:25:25 | 1:25:29 | |
Subtitles by Hazel Nairn BBC - 1987 | 1:25:34 | 1:25:38 | |
E-mail us at [email protected] | 1:25:38 | 1:25:41 |