Browse content similar to Boys' Club. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!
Line | From | To | |
---|---|---|---|
-TOM: -'So, we've been called out to this hiking trail | 0:00:02 | 0:00:03 | |
'because there's some reports that some teenagers | 0:00:03 | 0:00:05 | |
'are digging bags of dog poop out of the trash' | 0:00:05 | 0:00:07 | |
and having dog poop fights. | 0:00:07 | 0:00:09 | |
I don't believe it. | 0:00:09 | 0:00:11 | |
CHATTERING | 0:00:22 | 0:00:24 | |
Oh, my God. It's real. | 0:00:24 | 0:00:25 | |
Um...yeah, I'm not going to go deal with this. I'm leaving. | 0:00:25 | 0:00:29 | |
Hey! Hey! Hello? Boys! | 0:00:31 | 0:00:35 | |
I am Leslie Knope. I work for the Department Of Parks And Recreation. | 0:00:35 | 0:00:37 | |
-BOYS LAUGH -Nice! | 0:00:37 | 0:00:39 | |
OK, all right. Cool it! OK. | 0:00:39 | 0:00:43 | |
-Get her shoes! -No! Ah! | 0:00:43 | 0:00:45 | |
That's disgusting! What are you doing? | 0:00:45 | 0:00:46 | |
Help! Help! Help! Tom! | 0:00:46 | 0:00:50 | |
Tom! | 0:00:50 | 0:00:52 | |
No! Smells so bad. | 0:00:52 | 0:00:55 | |
LESLIE GRUNTS | 0:00:55 | 0:00:56 | |
Why would you think this was fun? | 0:00:56 | 0:00:58 | |
Really? Oh, really? Really? | 0:00:58 | 0:01:00 | |
Oh, hey! Hey! You like it? | 0:01:00 | 0:01:02 | |
Boom! | 0:01:02 | 0:01:03 | |
BOYS EXCLAIM | 0:01:03 | 0:01:05 | |
OK, here we go. Who wants it? | 0:01:06 | 0:01:07 | |
LESLIE GRUNTS | 0:01:07 | 0:01:09 | |
Whoo, missed it! | 0:01:09 | 0:01:10 | |
Yeah! | 0:01:12 | 0:01:13 | |
Actually, this is a little fun. This is fun. | 0:01:13 | 0:01:17 | |
Get her hair! | 0:01:17 | 0:01:18 | |
Oh. | 0:01:18 | 0:01:19 | |
Ooh. Hey, Tom. Check it out. | 0:01:41 | 0:01:43 | |
Norton Construction just sent this over. | 0:01:43 | 0:01:45 | |
Whoa, mama! | 0:01:45 | 0:01:46 | |
I love Great Lakes wine. | 0:01:46 | 0:01:48 | |
You can have the wine. | 0:01:48 | 0:01:49 | |
I want to take that cheese and do terrible things to it. | 0:01:49 | 0:01:51 | |
LESLIE TUTTS | 0:01:51 | 0:01:53 | |
No, no, no, no, no! | 0:01:53 | 0:01:55 | |
You know as well as I do | 0:01:55 | 0:01:56 | |
that we are not allowed to accept gifts over 25 dollars, | 0:01:56 | 0:01:59 | |
for corruption reasons. | 0:01:59 | 0:02:00 | |
We live in a fish bowl | 0:02:00 | 0:02:02 | |
and the public is always watching. | 0:02:02 | 0:02:03 | |
That's why I go two towns over | 0:02:03 | 0:02:05 | |
if I want to rent a movie with nudity in it. | 0:02:05 | 0:02:06 | |
Mmm. | 0:02:06 | 0:02:08 | |
Yeah, I probably shouldn't have said that. | 0:02:08 | 0:02:09 | |
But you cannot enjoy this basket, I'm so sorry. | 0:02:09 | 0:02:12 | |
And so to avoid temptation, I am going to lock it up. | 0:02:12 | 0:02:15 | |
When you're in government, | 0:02:15 | 0:02:16 | |
there's a million ways to exploit your power. | 0:02:16 | 0:02:18 | |
'Have I ever given in to that temptation? | 0:02:18 | 0:02:20 | |
'No, never. I'm not that kind of politician.' | 0:02:20 | 0:02:22 | |
Official Parks And Rec business. | 0:02:22 | 0:02:23 | |
Just need to grab a quick hot dog. | 0:02:23 | 0:02:25 | |
Sorry about that, little girl, you can have the next one. | 0:02:25 | 0:02:27 | |
'I have a moral code, and I never violate it. | 0:02:27 | 0:02:30 | |
'People look at me and they say, "Wow, Tom.' | 0:02:30 | 0:02:32 | |
"You are so pure, you're like a brown Superman with a beard | 0:02:32 | 0:02:35 | |
"that just stands for justice and truth and the American way." | 0:02:35 | 0:02:39 | |
So, Ann. I asked April to create one of those | 0:02:40 | 0:02:42 | |
social-network internet profiles for the Sullivan Street pit. | 0:02:42 | 0:02:45 | |
So, are you guys ready for the debut? | 0:02:45 | 0:02:47 | |
Yes, can we cut that red ribbon around your monitor now? | 0:02:47 | 0:02:49 | |
Absolutely. I love a good ribbon cutting. | 0:02:49 | 0:02:52 | |
LESLIE EXCLAIMS | 0:02:52 | 0:02:53 | |
Oh. April, that's good. | 0:02:53 | 0:02:55 | |
Kids. | 0:02:55 | 0:02:56 | |
Hey, look, the pit already has six friends. | 0:02:56 | 0:03:00 | |
Oh, yeah. Mark. Mark's a friend. | 0:03:00 | 0:03:01 | |
Well, you guys got to see Mark's profile. | 0:03:01 | 0:03:03 | |
Look at the photos of these ladies on his page. | 0:03:03 | 0:03:05 | |
-Wow. -Ew! Sick. | 0:03:05 | 0:03:07 | |
Maybe those are his relatives. | 0:03:07 | 0:03:08 | |
Yeah, maybe fake boobs run in his family. | 0:03:08 | 0:03:11 | |
Look at this lady. She's got a thong on her face. | 0:03:11 | 0:03:14 | |
Oh, my God, his favourite movie is Dances With Wolves. | 0:03:14 | 0:03:16 | |
OK, we're good. | 0:03:16 | 0:03:17 | |
We'll keep checking in on this. | 0:03:17 | 0:03:19 | |
Where is Mark, anyway? | 0:03:19 | 0:03:20 | |
Attending yet another meeting of the old boys' club. | 0:03:20 | 0:03:24 | |
'Politics is full of boys' clubs, formal and informal.' | 0:03:24 | 0:03:27 | |
Behind me are all the members of the city council over the past 30 years. | 0:03:27 | 0:03:31 | |
And every day, as a woman, I have to walk past this wall of men. | 0:03:31 | 0:03:34 | |
It can be very upsetting. Especially because of that guy. | 0:03:34 | 0:03:37 | |
No matter what direction I move, | 0:03:37 | 0:03:39 | |
he's always staring at my chest. | 0:03:39 | 0:03:41 | |
Hmm? | 0:03:41 | 0:03:43 | |
See? | 0:03:43 | 0:03:44 | |
What are they doing out there? | 0:03:44 | 0:03:46 | |
Wheeling and dealing. | 0:03:46 | 0:03:48 | |
Divvying up the empire. | 0:03:48 | 0:03:51 | |
Oh, my wife got me this shirt. | 0:03:51 | 0:03:52 | |
She swears it makes me look thinner. | 0:03:52 | 0:03:54 | |
It kind of does. | 0:03:54 | 0:03:55 | |
You know what we should do? Let's go out there. | 0:03:55 | 0:03:57 | |
Let's bust up that old boys' club. | 0:03:57 | 0:03:59 | |
We're doing great work in the government. We deserve to be included. | 0:03:59 | 0:04:01 | |
Sure, yeah. I could use a beer. | 0:04:01 | 0:04:03 | |
Yes, Ann! That's good, think like a man. | 0:04:03 | 0:04:04 | |
April, we're leaving, you're in charge. | 0:04:04 | 0:04:06 | |
And it's because you're a woman! | 0:04:06 | 0:04:08 | |
What, do you really like red tape and uphill battles? | 0:04:08 | 0:04:11 | |
-Hey, Leslie! -Hey! | 0:04:11 | 0:04:12 | |
What is up? | 0:04:12 | 0:04:13 | |
I'll tell you what's up. | 0:04:13 | 0:04:14 | |
A couple of ladies are coming to bust up your little boys' club. | 0:04:14 | 0:04:18 | |
Awesome. Glad to have you. Let me get you a beer. | 0:04:18 | 0:04:21 | |
-(We're in.) -Hey, I'm Brian. | 0:04:21 | 0:04:23 | |
Hi, Brian, Leslie Knope. Deputy director of... | 0:04:23 | 0:04:25 | |
-Drink that. -OK. | 0:04:25 | 0:04:27 | |
I'm Ann, everyone. I don't work here. | 0:04:27 | 0:04:29 | |
-ALL: -Hey, Ann. | 0:04:29 | 0:04:31 | |
So, what are you guys talking about? What's the topic du jour? | 0:04:31 | 0:04:33 | |
Oh! | 0:04:33 | 0:04:34 | |
GLASS SHATTERS | 0:04:34 | 0:04:36 | |
Did you hear that? | 0:04:36 | 0:04:38 | |
That was the sound of a glass ceiling being shattered. | 0:04:38 | 0:04:42 | |
The boys' club is more about socializing than work, you know? | 0:04:42 | 0:04:45 | |
'I mean, you got to loosen up. | 0:04:45 | 0:04:46 | |
'I kind of feel like I'm already in the boys' club. | 0:04:46 | 0:04:50 | |
'I mean, look at those bitches clean up after me.' | 0:04:50 | 0:04:52 | |
So, is this, like, your regular Tuesday night scene? | 0:04:52 | 0:04:55 | |
-Well, it's just a way to unwind, you know. -Mmm-hmm. | 0:04:55 | 0:04:57 | |
Really different from your Friday night crowd, right? | 0:04:57 | 0:05:00 | |
-What crowd? -You know, | 0:05:00 | 0:05:01 | |
the girls with the tribal back tattoos | 0:05:01 | 0:05:03 | |
who drink Red Bull for a living. | 0:05:03 | 0:05:04 | |
-Oh! Oh, I like this. This is banter. -That crowd. | 0:05:04 | 0:05:06 | |
-Banter's fun. -Where'd that come from? | 0:05:06 | 0:05:08 | |
We were just on the computer, | 0:05:08 | 0:05:09 | |
looking at your profile. | 0:05:09 | 0:05:10 | |
You know, you have a friend who has a tattoo that says, | 0:05:10 | 0:05:13 | |
"Daddy's Girl." | 0:05:13 | 0:05:14 | |
And both words are misspelled. | 0:05:14 | 0:05:16 | |
Ooh! Mixing it up with the boys! So... | 0:05:16 | 0:05:18 | |
what are you going to say? What's your comeback? | 0:05:18 | 0:05:19 | |
Those aren't really my friends anymore. | 0:05:19 | 0:05:21 | |
I don't hang out with them. | 0:05:21 | 0:05:22 | |
Oh, boo. Brendanawicz, that's some weak sauce. You need to hit harder! | 0:05:22 | 0:05:26 | |
Natalie, it's your sister. | 0:05:27 | 0:05:29 | |
Pick me up or I'm going to draw all over your jeans. | 0:05:30 | 0:05:33 | |
Well, it's official, people. We're out of beer. | 0:05:36 | 0:05:40 | |
That's the cue. See you later, Leslie. | 0:05:40 | 0:05:42 | |
It was nice hanging out, you know, after work hours. | 0:05:42 | 0:05:44 | |
-Wait! -I think I'm going to take off, too. | 0:05:44 | 0:05:46 | |
-Yeah, I should go, Leslie. -Wait, you guys! | 0:05:46 | 0:05:47 | |
Let's keep this good feeling going. | 0:05:47 | 0:05:49 | |
It's just getting started! | 0:05:49 | 0:05:50 | |
Um, yeah, cos parties usually get started when you run out of booze. | 0:05:50 | 0:05:53 | |
OK, wait. Just hold on a second. | 0:05:53 | 0:05:56 | |
I got wine! | 0:06:11 | 0:06:12 | |
-ALL: -Hey! | 0:06:12 | 0:06:13 | |
And cheese! | 0:06:13 | 0:06:14 | |
-ALL: -Hey! | 0:06:14 | 0:06:15 | |
Good morning. | 0:06:18 | 0:06:20 | |
Last night, in a foolish attempt to infiltrate a boys' club, | 0:06:20 | 0:06:24 | |
'I violated the government employee ethics code of the state of Indiana. | 0:06:24 | 0:06:27 | |
'I have always tried to live my life in an ethical way, and last night, I failed. | 0:06:27 | 0:06:31 | |
'I realise I have let down every female public official in America, | 0:06:31 | 0:06:35 | |
'and I would like to apologise to them, right now, | 0:06:35 | 0:06:38 | |
'individually, and in alphabetical order.' | 0:06:38 | 0:06:41 | |
Michele Bachmann, Republican, Minnesota. I am sorry. | 0:06:41 | 0:06:48 | |
Tammy Baldwin, Democrat, Wisconsin. I'm so sorry, Tammy. | 0:06:48 | 0:06:54 | |
Melissa Bean... | 0:06:54 | 0:06:55 | |
OK. Double shift, remember? So I won't see you till tomorrow. | 0:07:05 | 0:07:09 | |
-Are you going to be OK? -Oh, yeah. I got dinner. | 0:07:09 | 0:07:14 | |
Oh, God. Honey, can you just clean up a little bit? | 0:07:14 | 0:07:17 | |
I'll try. Don't expect much. | 0:07:19 | 0:07:21 | |
OK. I'll do it when I get home. | 0:07:21 | 0:07:24 | |
-You will? -Yes. Yes. | 0:07:24 | 0:07:25 | |
'Ann is amazing. | 0:07:25 | 0:07:27 | |
'She takes care of me, she takes care of sick people, sick babies.' | 0:07:27 | 0:07:31 | |
She is an angel. And I seriously love her. | 0:07:31 | 0:07:36 | |
Hard. | 0:07:36 | 0:07:37 | |
She's going to be gone for the next 24 hours so I made this list | 0:07:37 | 0:07:41 | |
and, basically, this place is going to be like a sparkling palace when she returns. | 0:07:41 | 0:07:46 | |
I took a bunch of painkillers. | 0:07:46 | 0:07:47 | |
They're about to kick in so I'm ready to go. | 0:07:47 | 0:07:50 | |
There it is. Let's clear the air. | 0:07:52 | 0:07:54 | |
Last night, I opened up this gift basket, for my own pleasure. | 0:07:54 | 0:07:58 | |
Really. Leslie Knope. Usually such a prudish stickler for the rules. | 0:07:58 | 0:08:02 | |
I'm not happy about it either, Tom. | 0:08:02 | 0:08:04 | |
It's like I don't even know you anymore. | 0:08:04 | 0:08:06 | |
Last year you wrote me up for making personal phone calls to my mom. | 0:08:06 | 0:08:09 | |
Yes, I did. And I would do it again. | 0:08:09 | 0:08:10 | |
Two wrongs do not make a right. | 0:08:10 | 0:08:12 | |
Yes, but she was in the hospital. | 0:08:12 | 0:08:14 | |
I did not know that at the time. | 0:08:15 | 0:08:17 | |
So, can I have the basket? | 0:08:17 | 0:08:18 | |
No, I'm sorry. It's evidence. | 0:08:18 | 0:08:19 | |
It's a nice basket. | 0:08:19 | 0:08:20 | |
What would you put in there? | 0:08:20 | 0:08:22 | |
I don't know. Potpourri? | 0:08:22 | 0:08:23 | |
-That's a lot of potpourri. -Hey, I am not the one on trial here. | 0:08:23 | 0:08:26 | |
I appreciate and thank you in advance for your unwavering support. | 0:08:26 | 0:08:29 | |
I think you should go to jail. Think about what you've done. | 0:08:29 | 0:08:32 | |
Go to jail? What's going on? | 0:08:33 | 0:08:35 | |
Ron, I have a very important and very long story to tell you. | 0:08:35 | 0:08:39 | |
-Put it in an e-mail? -Nope. | 0:08:41 | 0:08:42 | |
It happened right out there, right outside this window. | 0:08:43 | 0:08:47 | |
Why can't I look away? | 0:08:47 | 0:08:49 | |
Let's not blow this out of proportion. | 0:08:49 | 0:08:51 | |
I will blow this in proportion! | 0:08:51 | 0:08:54 | |
The minimum punishment for this | 0:08:54 | 0:08:55 | |
is an official reprimand from the city manager. | 0:08:55 | 0:08:58 | |
-It's not that big a deal. -Maybe in your world it isn't a big deal. | 0:08:58 | 0:09:01 | |
You're a white protestant man with a full, rich moustache. | 0:09:01 | 0:09:05 | |
But I am a woman | 0:09:05 | 0:09:06 | |
and I need to hold myself up to a higher standard. | 0:09:06 | 0:09:08 | |
This is ridiculous. You're punishing yourself | 0:09:08 | 0:09:10 | |
more than anybody else is going to punish you. | 0:09:10 | 0:09:12 | |
No. What do you suggest we do? | 0:09:12 | 0:09:15 | |
You think we should cover this up? | 0:09:15 | 0:09:16 | |
No, I'm not saying that. No-one said cover-up. | 0:09:16 | 0:09:19 | |
Good, because the cover-up is worse than the crime. | 0:09:19 | 0:09:22 | |
When you spill something and you try to wipe it up | 0:09:22 | 0:09:24 | |
with something that's dirty, | 0:09:24 | 0:09:26 | |
then you get double dirty. | 0:09:26 | 0:09:28 | |
-Please, don't make this worse. -Oh, my God. | 0:09:28 | 0:09:30 | |
Good afternoon. | 0:09:30 | 0:09:32 | |
Since we last spoke, I have taken extraordinary steps | 0:09:32 | 0:09:35 | |
to make further amends for the mistakes that I have made. | 0:09:35 | 0:09:39 | |
I have written a full confession, | 0:09:39 | 0:09:41 | |
which I will be e-mailing to everyone in the entire Pawnee government. | 0:09:41 | 0:09:46 | |
I've also attached a link to the pit's web page, | 0:09:46 | 0:09:49 | |
just to remind people of all the good work that I do. | 0:09:49 | 0:09:52 | |
I asked Ron to blow the whistle on me, and he refused. | 0:09:52 | 0:09:54 | |
And that is why I had to whistle-blow myself. | 0:09:54 | 0:09:57 | |
'I wish I could say some of this mess was Ann's, but it's all mine. | 0:10:00 | 0:10:05 | |
'I'm kind of a nester.' | 0:10:05 | 0:10:06 | |
Huh? Not bad for a guy with two broken legs. | 0:10:08 | 0:10:11 | |
Hey. | 0:10:19 | 0:10:20 | |
Hey. | 0:10:21 | 0:10:22 | |
'I'm doing a little experiment tonight to see what will get me drunker.' | 0:10:22 | 0:10:26 | |
-'Drinking wine...' -Leslie. Come here. | 0:10:27 | 0:10:29 | |
See what April put on the pit's web page. | 0:10:29 | 0:10:31 | |
'Right now, drinking wine is winning...' | 0:10:31 | 0:10:33 | |
Oh, my God. What am I looking at? | 0:10:33 | 0:10:35 | |
A video of me drinking some of that wine you stole. | 0:10:35 | 0:10:37 | |
What? Why did you do this? | 0:10:37 | 0:10:39 | |
Because I was waiting for my sister and I was bored, | 0:10:40 | 0:10:42 | |
and my hair looked really good. | 0:10:42 | 0:10:44 | |
And you put it in the pit's web page? | 0:10:44 | 0:10:46 | |
-Yeah. -OK, take this off. | 0:10:46 | 0:10:48 | |
OK. I just sent an e-mail to everyone in the government, | 0:10:48 | 0:10:50 | |
and I put a link to this page! | 0:10:50 | 0:10:51 | |
A young law-breaker. A future Leslie Knope. | 0:10:52 | 0:10:55 | |
-DOOR OPENS -Play it again for us, Jerry. -You got it. | 0:10:55 | 0:10:58 | |
Leslie? | 0:11:03 | 0:11:04 | |
She's 19 years old. | 0:11:04 | 0:11:06 | |
I thought I told you not to make this worse. | 0:11:06 | 0:11:08 | |
And I heard you loud and clear. | 0:11:08 | 0:11:09 | |
But then you made it worse. | 0:11:09 | 0:11:11 | |
The disciplinary committee is having a hearing tomorrow, | 0:11:12 | 0:11:15 | |
and you're going to have to testify. | 0:11:15 | 0:11:17 | |
Oh, no. | 0:11:17 | 0:11:18 | |
April might get dismissed. You could get fired. | 0:11:18 | 0:11:20 | |
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. | 0:11:20 | 0:11:22 | |
Oh, no. | 0:11:22 | 0:11:23 | |
Oh, God. | 0:11:23 | 0:11:24 | |
This bench is so uncomfortable. | 0:11:24 | 0:11:26 | |
Ow. Help. Please, Ron. Ron. | 0:11:26 | 0:11:30 | |
Ron, tell me it's going to be OK. | 0:11:30 | 0:11:32 | |
-Tell me it's going to be OK. -It's going to... | 0:11:32 | 0:11:34 | |
Ron? Where are you? | 0:11:34 | 0:11:35 | |
It's... It'll... Hang in. | 0:11:35 | 0:11:38 | |
-Ron! -OK. You're OK. | 0:11:38 | 0:11:41 | |
Good evening. | 0:11:41 | 0:11:42 | |
I've spoken to you a couple of times about something that happened, | 0:11:42 | 0:11:45 | |
but I don't want to... | 0:11:45 | 0:11:48 | |
I don't want to talk about it anymore. | 0:11:48 | 0:11:50 | |
So, the disciplinary committee awaits. | 0:11:52 | 0:11:55 | |
-Feeling good? Feeling strong? -Not really. No. | 0:11:55 | 0:11:57 | |
Do you want me to run some test questions with you? | 0:11:57 | 0:11:58 | |
Maybe give you an idea of what the disciplinary committee will be like? | 0:11:58 | 0:12:00 | |
Yeah, that'd be great. Yeah, thanks, Tom. | 0:12:00 | 0:12:03 | |
OK. | 0:12:03 | 0:12:05 | |
So, Miss Knope, you're accused of stealing wine. | 0:12:05 | 0:12:09 | |
How many drinks do you have per week, on average? | 0:12:09 | 0:12:11 | |
Zero. | 0:12:11 | 0:12:14 | |
Zero to six. | 0:12:14 | 0:12:15 | |
-I'm going to write down 10. -Yeah. | 0:12:15 | 0:12:18 | |
Do you ever cheat on your taxes? | 0:12:18 | 0:12:20 | |
No, no, no. Never. | 0:12:20 | 0:12:21 | |
Good. You're doing great. | 0:12:21 | 0:12:23 | |
How many sexual partners have you had in the last year? | 0:12:23 | 0:12:25 | |
-Are they going to ask that? -This is a deposition-style hearing, Miss Knope. | 0:12:25 | 0:12:28 | |
Nothing is off-limits. You have to answer. | 0:12:28 | 0:12:29 | |
Now, how many sexual partners have you had in the last year? | 0:12:29 | 0:12:33 | |
-Zero to six. -Zero. | 0:12:33 | 0:12:35 | |
-Have you ever thought about Ron sexually? -What? | 0:12:35 | 0:12:37 | |
Including dreams. | 0:12:37 | 0:12:39 | |
Have you ever had a sexual dream about our boss, Ron Swanson? | 0:12:39 | 0:12:41 | |
-No! Absolutely not. No. -Yes. | 0:12:41 | 0:12:44 | |
-No. -Now, in this recurring dream | 0:12:44 | 0:12:46 | |
that you have about Ron, is he like a regular Ron, | 0:12:46 | 0:12:48 | |
or is he half-Ron, half-animal, like a centaur? | 0:12:48 | 0:12:51 | |
What? No... | 0:12:51 | 0:12:52 | |
Is he wearing a football uniform? | 0:12:52 | 0:12:53 | |
Are you making love to him on a couch shaped like his moustache? | 0:12:53 | 0:12:57 | |
Is he covered in Powerade? | 0:12:57 | 0:12:58 | |
No, OK. Time-out. Time-out. | 0:12:58 | 0:12:59 | |
This committee doesn't take time-outs, Miss Knope. | 0:12:59 | 0:13:01 | |
Now answer the question! | 0:13:01 | 0:13:02 | |
-I need something to drink. -How about some stolen wine? | 0:13:02 | 0:13:04 | |
No. I meant water. | 0:13:04 | 0:13:07 | |
Thank you for your time, Miss Knope. You're fired. | 0:13:07 | 0:13:10 | |
So, that's kind of your worst-case scenario, you know? | 0:13:10 | 0:13:12 | |
If you can handle that, I think you'll be fine. | 0:13:12 | 0:13:15 | |
Great. | 0:13:15 | 0:13:16 | |
'Ron, thank you for being here with me today.' | 0:13:18 | 0:13:20 | |
I'm your department head. I have to be. | 0:13:20 | 0:13:23 | |
Nonetheless. | 0:13:23 | 0:13:24 | |
-Miss Knope? -Yes. | 0:13:24 | 0:13:25 | |
You're here because you allegedly accepted a gift of over 25 dollars | 0:13:25 | 0:13:29 | |
and contributed to the delinquency of a minor. | 0:13:29 | 0:13:32 | |
Can you tell us what happened? | 0:13:32 | 0:13:33 | |
I'm going to take a glass of water first, if I may. | 0:13:33 | 0:13:35 | |
Certainly. | 0:13:35 | 0:13:37 | |
Sorry. | 0:13:37 | 0:13:38 | |
"Two days ago, | 0:13:49 | 0:13:50 | |
"I attended an informal boys' club meeting for the very first time." | 0:13:50 | 0:13:55 | |
"After one and a half beers, | 0:13:56 | 0:13:58 | |
"awash in the glow of acceptance | 0:13:58 | 0:13:59 | |
"into this elite, exclusive club..." | 0:13:59 | 0:14:01 | |
Sorry, what club is this? | 0:14:01 | 0:14:03 | |
A couple city planners like to drink beer | 0:14:03 | 0:14:06 | |
in the courtyard on Tuesday nights. | 0:14:06 | 0:14:08 | |
No-one is supposed to drink alcohol on government property. | 0:14:08 | 0:14:11 | |
That's not my department. | 0:14:11 | 0:14:13 | |
Go ahead, Leslie. | 0:14:13 | 0:14:14 | |
"I made a very unwise decision. | 0:14:16 | 0:14:18 | |
"A decision that will live in infamy. | 0:14:18 | 0:14:20 | |
"I opened a gift basket of wine and cheese." | 0:14:20 | 0:14:23 | |
"Our intern, April Ludgate, | 0:14:27 | 0:14:30 | |
"drank some of that wine without my knowledge." | 0:14:30 | 0:14:32 | |
"That was never part of the plan. | 0:14:33 | 0:14:35 | |
"She had not been invited to the meeting of the boys' club. | 0:14:35 | 0:14:38 | |
"I repeat, not been invited. | 0:14:38 | 0:14:41 | |
"Though it is my hope that some day, she lives in a world | 0:14:41 | 0:14:44 | |
"where the very idea of boys' clubs is ancient history." | 0:14:44 | 0:14:48 | |
But you did open the gift basket. And the intern did drink the wine. | 0:14:50 | 0:14:56 | |
Please, don't blame her for my mistake. | 0:14:56 | 0:14:58 | |
The biggest crime we could commit here | 0:14:58 | 0:15:01 | |
would be to destroy a teenage girl's passion for local government. | 0:15:01 | 0:15:06 | |
There's only one more thing I need to clean, me. | 0:15:08 | 0:15:11 | |
Um, I can't really get into a shower, | 0:15:11 | 0:15:13 | |
so I got this idea from my parents. | 0:15:13 | 0:15:17 | |
This is how they clean their dog. | 0:15:17 | 0:15:19 | |
ANDY SINGS ON CD PLAYER | 0:15:19 | 0:15:21 | |
Do you like that? | 0:15:23 | 0:15:25 | |
Huh? | 0:15:25 | 0:15:26 | |
I wrote that for Ann. | 0:15:26 | 0:15:29 | |
It's going to be playing when she walks through the door today. | 0:15:29 | 0:15:31 | |
And check this out. Washed my shorts. How do you like that? | 0:15:31 | 0:15:35 | |
Hey. Turn that down. | 0:15:38 | 0:15:39 | |
No. I wrote that song. | 0:15:39 | 0:15:41 | |
I don't care. Turn it down. | 0:15:41 | 0:15:42 | |
What are you doing in my yard, Lawrence? Get out of here. | 0:15:42 | 0:15:44 | |
OK, you know what? I'm taking this. | 0:15:44 | 0:15:46 | |
Put down my boom box. | 0:15:46 | 0:15:47 | |
It's my boom box now. I asked you nicely. | 0:15:47 | 0:15:49 | |
You did not ask me nicely! Put that down! | 0:15:49 | 0:15:52 | |
I just put 12 new batteries in that thing! | 0:15:52 | 0:15:55 | |
Lawrence, come on! | 0:16:00 | 0:16:02 | |
What's going on out here? | 0:16:02 | 0:16:03 | |
Give it to me! | 0:16:03 | 0:16:04 | |
DOG BARKS | 0:16:04 | 0:16:06 | |
-Come on. -Go back inside, Hank. | 0:16:06 | 0:16:08 | |
'Miss Knope,' | 0:16:08 | 0:16:09 | |
what was the first thing you did when you arrived at work the next day? | 0:16:09 | 0:16:12 | |
Can you go over the time line for us once more? | 0:16:12 | 0:16:14 | |
Yes, of course. I awoke at 6.21am. | 0:16:14 | 0:16:17 | |
After a fitful night of sleep... | 0:16:17 | 0:16:18 | |
We've been over this. | 0:16:18 | 0:16:20 | |
What more could you guys possibly want her to do? | 0:16:20 | 0:16:23 | |
Well, we don't know yet. | 0:16:23 | 0:16:25 | |
Frankly we've got a lot more questions. | 0:16:25 | 0:16:26 | |
RON GROANS Ron, it's OK. | 0:16:26 | 0:16:28 | |
No, it's not. This is not Communist China. | 0:16:28 | 0:16:31 | |
You cannot make her whip herself. | 0:16:31 | 0:16:32 | |
You cannot make her wear a hair shirt. | 0:16:32 | 0:16:35 | |
We weren't planning on doing either of those things. | 0:16:35 | 0:16:36 | |
This is America. | 0:16:36 | 0:16:38 | |
You want to live in North Korea, you can live in North Korea. | 0:16:38 | 0:16:41 | |
I don't want to. I want to live in America. | 0:16:41 | 0:16:44 | |
Leslie has never broken a rule in her life, | 0:16:44 | 0:16:46 | |
to the point that it's annoying. | 0:16:46 | 0:16:49 | |
If you want to slap her on the wrist, go ahead. | 0:16:49 | 0:16:51 | |
If you want to do anything more serious, | 0:16:51 | 0:16:53 | |
you're going to have to go through me. | 0:16:53 | 0:16:54 | |
-Let's go. -Are we done? | 0:16:54 | 0:16:56 | |
We're done, let's go. | 0:16:56 | 0:16:57 | |
So, after all that, it's really not that bad. | 0:17:02 | 0:17:05 | |
You're going to get a letter in your file. | 0:17:05 | 0:17:07 | |
-Ron, I just wanted to say thank you, so... -Don't worry about it. | 0:17:08 | 0:17:10 | |
'No, I didn't do it for Leslie. I did it because I hate bureaucracy.' | 0:17:15 | 0:17:20 | |
My idea of a perfect government is one guy, | 0:17:20 | 0:17:24 | |
who sits in a small room at a desk, | 0:17:24 | 0:17:26 | |
and the only thing he's allowed to decide is who to nuke. | 0:17:26 | 0:17:30 | |
The man is chosen based on some kind of IQ test, | 0:17:30 | 0:17:33 | |
and maybe also a physical tournament, like a decathlon. | 0:17:33 | 0:17:37 | |
And women are brought to him, maybe, | 0:17:37 | 0:17:41 | |
when he desires them. | 0:17:41 | 0:17:44 | |
Oh, hey, Ann. You're here. | 0:17:44 | 0:17:45 | |
Yeah, I came from the hospital. How'd it go? | 0:17:45 | 0:17:48 | |
I don't want to be overdramatic, | 0:17:48 | 0:17:49 | |
but today felt like 100 years in hell | 0:17:49 | 0:17:51 | |
and the absolute worst day of my life. | 0:17:51 | 0:17:52 | |
Oh, God. | 0:17:52 | 0:17:54 | |
I never should have opened that stupid basket. | 0:17:54 | 0:17:56 | |
Yeah. Why did you open that basket? | 0:17:56 | 0:17:58 | |
It doesn't really seem like you. | 0:17:58 | 0:17:59 | |
I think it's cos I wanted to shatter the glass ceiling. | 0:17:59 | 0:18:02 | |
You know what I mean? And just kind of infiltrate the boys' club. | 0:18:02 | 0:18:05 | |
Hmm. | 0:18:05 | 0:18:06 | |
I did it for a guy. | 0:18:08 | 0:18:10 | |
-Oh! -Yeah. Mark. | 0:18:10 | 0:18:13 | |
Oh. | 0:18:14 | 0:18:16 | |
Oh. Wow. | 0:18:16 | 0:18:18 | |
I... We had a brief affair in February of 2004. | 0:18:18 | 0:18:23 | |
And there's still something very complicated between us, so... | 0:18:23 | 0:18:28 | |
Yeah. Sure. | 0:18:29 | 0:18:31 | |
Yeah. | 0:18:31 | 0:18:32 | |
Smart woman. Iffy choice in men. | 0:18:32 | 0:18:35 | |
But then again, I'm not one to talk. | 0:18:36 | 0:18:38 | |
DOOR OPENS | 0:18:39 | 0:18:41 | |
ANN GASPS | 0:18:42 | 0:18:44 | |
What do you think? | 0:18:45 | 0:18:46 | |
Andy. This is so sweet. | 0:18:46 | 0:18:49 | |
-It's nothing. -What happened to you? | 0:18:49 | 0:18:51 | |
Oh, I was chasing our neighbour who's a total jagweed | 0:18:51 | 0:18:55 | |
and I fell in some prickly bushes. | 0:18:55 | 0:18:57 | |
Doesn't matter. What do you think of the house, huh? | 0:18:57 | 0:19:00 | |
-Were you totally surprised? -Yeah. | 0:19:00 | 0:19:02 | |
-Do you love it? -Yeah. | 0:19:02 | 0:19:04 | |
Here, baby. Sit down. I'm going to put something on those scratches. | 0:19:04 | 0:19:06 | |
Somebody is getting gently laid tonight. | 0:19:08 | 0:19:11 | |
Andy! God! | 0:19:11 | 0:19:14 | |
You look like you need one of these. | 0:19:21 | 0:19:23 | |
Come on. You're over 21. | 0:19:23 | 0:19:27 | |
You're not supposed to be drinking on government property. | 0:19:27 | 0:19:29 | |
Loosen up. You're going to drive yourself crazy | 0:19:29 | 0:19:31 | |
trying to follow every single rule in government. | 0:19:31 | 0:19:34 | |
Mark, I have a letter in my file. | 0:19:34 | 0:19:36 | |
I got seven letters in my file. | 0:19:36 | 0:19:39 | |
Pretty much every guy in city planning has a bunch of letters. | 0:19:39 | 0:19:42 | |
So, welcome to the team. | 0:19:43 | 0:19:45 | |
Look out, boys. I'm in your club now. | 0:19:51 | 0:19:53 | |
I'm in your club. I'm in your club. I'm in your club. I'm in your club. | 0:19:53 | 0:19:56 | |
I'm in your club. I'm in your club. I'm in your... Mmm. Creepy. | 0:19:56 | 0:20:00 |