David Harper v Phil Serrell - Foreign Antiques Market Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is

This is Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is,

the show that pitches TV's

best-loved antiques experts against each other

in an all-out battle for profit.

Let's make hay while that sun shines.

Each day, one pair of duelling dealers will face a mighty challenge...

I've got a heavy profit here.

..putting their reputations on the line...

Who's there?

They'll give you the insider's view of the trade...

HE GROWLS

..along with their top tips and savvy secrets...

That could present a problem.

..showing you how to make the most money...

Ready for battle.

..from buying and selling.

Get in there!

Coming up, David reveals that old age is all the rage

when it comes to leather.

I love worn-out leather.

It just improves with age.

You can't get that pattern-ation without use, abuse and wear.

Phil's haggling technique backfires.

15, I could do.

PHIL WEEPS

-Now it's 225 again.

-No! No, no, no!

And when it comes to selling, it's all about knowing the right lingo.

You'd use this to swing the dingy-thing.

Swing this dingly-dongler, I think we call it in the trade.

This is Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is.

Welcome, one and all, to our foreign foray.

Today, we're in Maastricht antiques market in Holland,

famed for its cheese, tulips and the birthplace of Vincent van Gogh,

and of course, the European Union.

In this historic city,

50 stalls of wondrous wares await our dealers as they battle to buy,

sell and earn a winning profit.

First up, it's our fancier of finery.

He knows his Rembrandts from his rubbish.

With his eyes on the prize and a head for haggling, it's...

I'm hovering like a hyena.

And trying to beat David

is a man whose antiques artistry knows no bounds.

A forward thinker of fortune with a penchant for the priceless, it's...

I can feel a bit of a spend coming on.

They both have £750 worth of their own euros to spend as they go

head-to-head to make a profit,

which will all be sent to our dealers' chosen charities.

So, David Harper and Phil Serrell,

it's time to put your money where your mouth is.

-I'm cold!

-You know what they say about you, Dave.

-You never 'mass a tricht'.

-Oh!

-Topical, you see!

-Oh, I can't beat it, Phil.

-It's best not to, really.

-I thought we were in Belgium. Where are we?

-I've been telling you

for days we're going to Holland.

-Hol-land.

-Right. How much money have you got?

-We've got £750...

-And a lot of stalls to go round.

-It looks good.

Shall we try and find something vernacular?

-Vernacular? What, clogs?

-Well, you know, local to the area.

-A bit of cheese.

-Cheese?

-Yeah.

-Cheese and clogs!

-Tulips.

-Good combination!

-See you later on.

-Good luck.

-Take care.

-Yeah.

Mmm, so now our big spenders have agreed on where they are

and which souvenirs they're going to take back home,

it's time to get down to business, and with "The Fox" out of ear shot,

"Devilish" can dish the dirt.

Right, fantastic,

away from Phil Serrell and his dreadful jokes,

that I've heard 48,000 times.

I'm on my own in a foreign fair,

so I'm going to be looking for something out of the ordinary.

Not the kind of thing you might find at a British fair.

So I'm looking for a little bit of Continental flair.

Yes, David's plan is to get right in there

with the curious Continental collectables.

Whereas for Phil, that's the one thing that's worrying him.

Foreign markets are great. I absolutely love them.

The thing is, you really are a fish out of water here because you're

looking at things that are very local and specific to this area,

and I'm going to buy them here and take them back home.

Is that a clever thing to do?

Well, yes, Phil, that's exactly what you're here to do.

Hmm, while Phil ponders on his position,

David is like the early bird.

The very, very early bird.

-Morning.

-Good morning.

Hold on, where is everybody?

I think this is the trick, you know. Get here early

and watch things unload. But have you noticed? There are no buyers.

There's only Phil Serrell and me. I can't believe it!

Here is a massive opportunity for people to get here and bag the best

pieces. If this was in England, I think it'd be teeming with buyers.

With "Devilish" confident that he's got the market almost to himself,

it's not long before he spots a wall light he likes the look of.

Now, let's see how much of the local lingo that he's learned.

Hello, there, good morning. Um, I don't speak Dutch, I'm afraid.

-Er, none, then.

-Do you speak English?

-A little bit.

-Oh, good. A little bit is enough.

-How much is the little wall light there?

-65.

-65. OK.

I don't know where I'd go with that one.

What else have you got? What about this doggy here?

Is this a greyhound? Oh, he's actually a pot.

Terracotta, I think.

No great age to him.

Sorry, her.

-A broken paw there. How much is the doggie?

-25.

25 euro?

Um, can I give you 20?

-Yes.

-20. You're a delight.

Thank you very much, thank you very much. I've bought myself a pet.

David's porcelain pooch sets him back 20 euros,

or £14.81 when converted.

And his new pet is already pulling at his heartstrings.

Now, come on. Who could fail to fall in love with that face?

Isn't she just absolutely gorgeous?

A good-sized greyhound or a whippet, probably 20-30 years old,

the odd chip here and there, a little scar down her neck,

but this all adds to her character.

She is absolutely gorgeous, and we as a nation, the British,

love our animals.

And I'm going to find someone who falls desperately in love with this

gorgeous creature.

So, along with his canine companion, David is off the blocks.

Meanwhile, Phil is on the hunt for his first purchase,

and it appears he's looking for the finer things today.

This is a tuning-fork watch.

If you keep it to your ear, you will hear it hum.

Zzzzz! And that's the humming of your tuning fork.

-And that is 350?

-350, yeah.

-OK, thank you much indeed.

-You're welcome.

But it seems the price tags on the things he likes...

120 euros.

..are a little too high.

How much are the tiles, please?

95 euros.

No good. There's no middle ground at this fair.

Things are either really cheap and, actually, not too much quality,

or really expensive.

Yes, Phil's struggling with his pricing points today

and is keeping his euros under wraps for now.

But across the market...

This fair is tiny, but brilliant.

Really interesting objects.

And, I think, incredibly cheap.

Ah, well, there's one man that doesn't agree with you,

but he's just spotted something he likes the look of.

A bit of automotive memorabilia.

Hello.

-How much, please?

-20.

-Could you take ten euros?

-15 euros!

-Ten!

-15. No!

-Oh, look at the look on his face. Look at the look on his face,

Hmm, recognise that, do you, Phil?

15. I'll have that off you.

-Yes?

-Yes, thank you very much.

Yes, Phil knows a good deal when he sees it,

and those shallow pockets get

some action as he bags his first buy of the day

for 15 euros, or £11.11.

This is from that great golden era when

Those Magnificent Men In Their Flying Machines

and Monte Carlo Or Bust! and all that sort of stuff.

So you've got the early days

of motoring and the earlier days of aviation,

and wouldn't it be just lovely if this came from this period?

It doesn't. It's out of period.

This poster's probably ten or 20 years old.

But I think it's quite stylistic. It conveys a really good,

strong image, and I'm hoping I'm going to find somebody who is either

into their flying, or their cars, who might want a poster.

Or perhaps someone with a flying car! Ha-ha!

Close by, David is still looking for the unusual.

But it appears that when he said he wanted collectables

from the Continent,

he wasn't necessarily limiting himself to the European one.

I'll tell you what, tribal art is a fascinating area.

Right now, I'm very much into this sort of ethnic carving.

But you have to really understand it thoroughly, or otherwise,

you can badly get your fingers burnt.

It's going to take me a couple of years probably of reading, studying,

handling before I feel completely and utterly confident

to go out there and spend big money on this stuff.

It's a minefield but massively fascinating.

Yes, very sensible.

Meanwhile, Phil is still being cautious with his cash.

-How much?

-125.

And back it goes.

This could be a long day.

How much is that?

-It's 700 and...

-No, too much for me.

After a close inspection of almost every item on the stall,

Phil finds a pair of white metal vintage pens and a

Napoleonic-style, early 20th century straw trinket box.

But there's that all-important question again.

What is the very, very best you can do for those two?

-50 together.

-50 euros together?

-Yes.

-I'll have both those. Thank you very much.

Well, we got there in the end, and Phil gets two pens

and the straw box for a combined price

of just over £37 when converted.

So, what made him splash the cash?

Boys and their toys.

Now, I've got a ballpoint pen and a fountain pen.

I think they're really cool things.

White metal overlay cut

and they would adorn and grace any gentleman's desk.

And at the money I paid, there's got to be a profit in these.

And for me, the real little treasure is this straw workbox.

French prisoners of war got straw,

coloured it and split it and covered boxes and they made things just like

this. It's a real good old-fashioned antique and there's got to be a

-profit in that.

-And that double purchase means that our

hard-bargaining Brit now has three items to his opponent's one.

But on the other side of the market,

David could be ringing up his next purchase.

MS Bremen.

Any idea where that's from?

-German.

-German, yeah.

And dated 1911 as well.

That's handy. Is it a ship's bell?

-Yes.

-From a ship, yeah?

-It's a good sound.

-Good sound, is it?

-Can I...?

-You can try it.

That would wake the sailors up!

You can hear it from one mile.

-A mile! Is that the idea?

-Yeah.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-My gosh!

That's very powerful. What sort of price is that?

-15.

-15 euros?

-It's not expensive at all.

-Yes.

-I don't think I could say no to that.

I think I'm going to say yes. Thank you very much.

Without even a haggle,

David chimes in his second purchase

and spends just over £11.

Mmm, someone feels like they're getting good deals today.

That is a really...quite an interesting ship's bell,

lovely with the date - 1911,

just three years before the outbreak of the First World War.

German, certainly.

In period, absolutely.

This is one of the big worries with objects like this.

You know, is it a reproduction?

Well, I'm very happy that it's not.

It's got lots of age to it. It's not the best quality thing

in the world, but it wasn't meant to be.

It's a functioning bit of kit.

And the Bremen would've had lots of these bells,

and then when it's being broken up, bells and all,

bits and pieces of ship, and then just distributed

and sold off. So there we go.

And it rings really well.

HE RINGS BELL

-Time to go shopping.

-Well, there is just a little snag with that.

This is it. We have kind of come to the end of the fair.

It's a tiny little fair, in actual fact.

That's it! But lots of stuff and it's certainly cheap,

there's no doubt about it.

Yes, David's wallet is still bursting at the seams and,

as he heads back to the stalls, he finds somewhere to rest it.

So, this thing is a low table

designed as a little smoker's table or a wine table.

What's nice about it...

It's a real thing. It's not a repro.

It shows it as well.

People may criticise it cos it has been kicked and dropped so many times.

It has seen action, this thing, which, to me, adds great character.

Now, "Devilish", what were you just saying

about this being a cheap market?

Probably not much more than five euros.

-60. 60 euros.

-16?

-60!

Oh, 6-0. Oh!

-Right, OK.

-6-0, yeah.

Sorry, language barrier.

Yeah, sure, sure.

-Can it be 40 euros?

-50 will be my best price.

-I'm going to have it for 50 euros. Thank you.

-Thanks.

Thank you very much indeed.

-You're welcome.

-A good piece of period Art Deco.

Clap your eyes on that beauty.

50 euros.

Maybe not as cheap as he would have liked,

but David snaps up this faux tortoiseshell side table

for £37.04.

Super stylish, don't you think?

And absolutely no money.

An in-period, Art Deco, little wine or smoker's table

dated to about 1935, certainly pre-Second World War.

Original condition - worn a little bit - but you've got the chrome,

you've got the metal and then you've got a cast-iron base to give it

plenty of weight, cos this is a small table

and you don't want it getting knocked over.

And then the original top, which is faux tortoiseshell.

And it's so twee, but super, super cool.

I absolutely love it.

And while David continues to build his cache of collectibles,

Phil has some breaking knick-knack news.

This is David Harper, filming Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is,

for the BBC, at Maastricht in Holland.

Actually, it's not really. It's me.

And that awful impression brings us up to the midway point.

It's time to see who's thriving on this foreign antiques adventure

and who's in need of an international rescue.

So, how much have they spent so far?

With £750 worth of euros to spend,

David has so far bought three pieces and spent £62.96,

which leaves him just over £687 in his kitty.

Phil "The Fox" had a slow start,

but has also got three items and spent just £48.15,

leaving him with over £701 to attack the second half.

But before that, they have time for a quick catch up.

Wow! It's not getting any warmer, that's for sure.

And, I tell you what, this is a really interesting fair.

I can't believe there are no buyers here.

I think the stuff is really cheap.

-They don't get up, do they?

-They don't.

They're sensible, but they should be up because I reckon

there are some stonking bargains.

-The early bird and all that.

-We're a pair of early...

-Talking of which,

-I haven't got time. I've got to get buying.

-Oh!

-See you.

Well, have you ever seen Phil move so fast?

Could it be that David said something he didn't like

the sound of? Perhaps it was that "C" word - cheap.

David has been doing this for many, many years,

and if there is something cheap out there,

you can bet your bottom dollar he'll go and find it,

so I'll have to get my skates on and really concentrate now.

So, all geed up and ready to sink some of his money into this market,

Phil homes in on some vintage leather luggage.

-How much is that, please?

-65.

-It's real leather.

-Yeah. Pigskin. Yeah.

It's a lovely thing, isn't it?

But you've got to sort the interior out, haven't you?

You've got to line this, really, haven't you?

-Yes.

-What's your best price?

-65.

-Would 50 euros buy it?

Yeah, it's OK.

Thank you. I can go on my holidays now, look.

A case!

Well, he certainly dipped into his holiday fund

with his fourth and most expensive item so far,

spending just over £37.

But there's more going on here than meets the eye.

Everything in life is not always what it seems.

This looks like a suitcase, but it hasn't been. If you look inside,

this was originally fitted out

probably for a gentleman's vanity case.

I think the way forward is to line this and you've then got

a really cool,

probably pigskin vintage case.

I'd love to own that.

I just hope someone else feels the same way.

The gentleman's vanity case gives Phil a 4-3 advantage and,

with his chokehold on the cash loosening,

it's not long before he spots another potential purchase.

-But what is it?

-How much is that, please?

-20 euros.

-It's interesting, isn't it?

-Made out of oak. Yeah.

-PHIL KNOCKS ON ITEM

-It's for shoes.

-For shoes?

-Cleaning.

-For cleaning things, is it?

-Yeah, yeah.

-Cleaning things.

What's the best you can do it for?

Would 15 euros be good?

-15?

-Yes.

-Thank you very much.

Bye-bye.

So, Phil pays £11.11 for the box,

but he thinks it wasn't made for shoes but for salt.

This is probably mid-19th century, made out of oak,

and I think in England that's worth probably between £40 and £80,

something like that. So, at 15 euros,

I'm kind of hoping there's a profit in that.

So, Phil is hoping for a healthy profit there come the selling.

And, with that, "The Fox" has nudged ahead with five purchases to David's

three. Meanwhile, our man "Devilish"

is still looking for the unusual.

Now, strike a pose.

That is a tiny, tiny mannequin.

Never seen a mannequin so small.

Shop fitting type things are very, very good news in actual fact,

but they've got to have a bit of style as well. It's lost the style.

I know, darling! It's so last season!

Oh, have a look at that, though.

You know what I want? A man-bag.

Seriously, I've been thinking for ages about getting a man-bag.

Good leather gets better with age.

How much for the man-bag?

-25.

-25 euros.

Do you wear a man-bag?

-No.

-No, not everybody can get away with wearing a man-bag.

Mmm, I bet you can, though, David.

How old is it? Ten, 20 years old?

1950, 1960.

You think it's as old as that? Cool.

You can have it for 20.

So, as soon as I model it, obviously I look so rubbish,

it goes down in price!

Marvellous! 20 euros, that's great, actually.

It's very cool. You should wear a man-bag.

You would suit a man-bag.

OK, I'm going to buy a man-bag, but not for myself.

I need to find a friend, who is a man, who wants a man-bag.

I'll have it. Thank you.

-Nice day!

-You, too. Get a man-bag.

Sorry, what type of bag was it?

Let's just review to find out.

You know what I want? A man-bag.

-Sorry, come again?

-Seriously,

I've been thinking for ages about getting a man-bag.

Man-bag. Man-bag.

Man-bag. Man-bag, man-bag, man-bag...

-man-bag...

-Oh, man-bag!

Got it! So, our fashionista of finery picked up his

"you know what" bag for £14.81

and has fulfilled a lifelong dream.

You know, this is a very big day for me.

This is the day that I first buy a man-bag.

I've always wanted one.

I love worn-out leather.

It just improves with age.

You can't get that patination without use,

abuse and wear, and it's fantastic.

Date-wise, the chap thinks it's 1960s.

I think it's a bit later, but I don't think it matters.

It's good quality, nice, thick stitching. Good, thick leather.

Worn in all the right places. Loads of pockets and slips.

It's just brilliant. You can fill it with all sorts of rubbish.

This is it. It is now mine.

I am going to attempt to sell it, obviously.

But in the meantime, before I do sell it, I'm going to wear it.

# Papa's got a brand-new bag... #

Yes, very nice.

And that means our designer dealer is trailing Phil by one item now.

"The Fox" has gone from a gentle simmer to a hot-boiled bargainer

as he turns up the heat with his next seller.

So, tell me about these stoves.

-How much is that one?

-175.

-But that's sort of Art Deco-ey, isn't it?

-That's Art Deco, yes.

-That one?

-675.

-Oh!

I like that one.

-It's a good one.

-And how much is that one?

-275.

-You see, I was thinking a lot less than that.

Oh! You can try...

-I can try.

-But I have the freedom to say no.

Absolutely right, yeah.

I'll give you 200 euros for it, and that's me finished.

I haven't got any more. 200 euros.

-Sorry.

-Oh, dear!

Phil's not getting the deal he wants.

-But, wait!

-215 I could do.

-PHIL WEEPS

Oh, it looks like the market's got the better of him.

-Now it's 225 again.

-No, no, no.

HE LAUGHS

What about... Look, if I gave you 205 and that gives me a chance.

-OK.

-You're a gentleman.

Thank you, thank you.

Having left a big impression all over the seller's scarf,

Phil walks away a happy camper,

getting his wood burner for 205 euros,

or £151.85.

One of the things I love about this business is the way we recycle

everything. This is a cast French stove from about 1900, 1940,

something like that. But we can still use it today.

This would look great in one of the yurts, if you want to go glamping.

My only real regret is I didn't get some wood to put on it,

because it is so blooming cold.

# Relight my fire... #

He might have been economic with his euros all day.

Phil's final purchase,

though, has also been the biggest and means he can beat a triumphant

-retreat.

-Well, that's me finished, shopped up.

And this has been a really interesting antiques market

because it's not that big, but there are some really good things here,

and some not such good things here. I just hope that

my, uh, eyes haven't let me down.

Well, you've certainly been watching your wallet closely enough!

Now, with dozens of stalls to choose from,

David ends up at the vendor where Phil bought his wood burner.

And while "The Fox" turned on some very suspect tears to good effect,

David is brewing a charm offensive.

Who fancies a rather nice cup of tea?

I've just been talking to this lovely chap here about a fascinating

-kettle.

-It is!

-And amazing that it still has its gas connector.

The gas came out of the wall...

-Yeah.

-..so that they had tea or hot water all the time.

It's amazing. And then you don't

have to actually take it off its cradle, you simply pour like so.

-You're missing a bit on the handle.

-No, I don't think so.

-Yeah, here.

-It's coming away.

-This is original.

-Yeah, that is original,

but the wicker would have come all the way to the end.

I don't think they'd leave that raw, would they?

It's not actually a criticism of it.

I think it's just a sign that it is very original.

This was a very, very posh bit of kit.

I mean, this was for somebody with a lot of money.

-Talking of money...

-150 euros for it.

-150?

-Yes.

-Could it be much cheaper?

-My best price would be 125.

-125, thank you very much. Yeah, thank you.

-You're welcome.

So, David's cooking on gas and secures his kettle

for a hefty £92.59.

You know, I really can't tell you how interesting this thing is to me.

It's not just a kettle on a stand.

It is so incredibly modern.

When you think it was designed and made in the late 19th century,

it's incredible. It's almost spaceship style.

In completely original condition.

This is the absolute height of fashion

and very expensive, circa 1890,

and the fact that it's still plumbed in for its gas is mind-blowing.

More tea, Vicar?

And with that, the buying is done and a heady day of canvassing,

negotiating and procuring all manner of wonderful wares comes to an end.

It's time to see what our dealers have spent.

They both started the day with £750 worth of their own euros to spend.

David found the bargains today and bought five items

for £170.36.

Phil was trying not to spend,

but bought six items and spent much more than his opponent -

£248.15.

Well, that was the fair that was, wasn't it?

Not bad for our first visit to Holland.

I've really, really enjoyed it. We've got a great Dutch takeaway. It was a good old fair, wasn't it?

Great fair. Look at this! Such a Continental environment.

-Absolutely right.

-It feels distinctly different, doesn't it?

Yeah. So, go on, tell me.

Out of all yours, which is your very favourite piece?

The best object, probably, is the kettle.

-It's quite a cool looking thing, isn't it?

-Gas powered.

You take it home, plug it into your gas system...

-Blow yourself up!

-Marvellous!

But my man-bag, I've never bought a man-bag before.

-I like that.

-I saw you wearing a man-bag the other day,

-and I was admiring it.

-No man should be without a bag.

-You're right.

-Absolutely right, yeah, yeah.

On the luggage front, you see, I love that.

-That, I would use that.

-It's such a good case, isn't it?

Really, really lovely.

I tell you what, it's getting that cold here,

do you have any wood I could put on the fire?

We could do that, actually.

-I've got a mistake, though, I think.

-What's that?

-Well...

Phil, we both love cars, so you'd be expected to buy that.

Yeah, I know, I know. And I couldn't help myself,

but I don't think there's much profit in it.

But, hey-ho! So, we've done the really easy part, haven't we?

-Buying is just a doddle.

-And it's good fun buying. Love it!

Yeah, but the tough part is selling it.

Well, we've got a long train journey.

-Yeah.

-We can plot, scheme and plan our selling strategies.

-I've got an idea.

-What's that?

I'm going to buy all of your stuff, and you buy all of my stuff, it's

-job sorted.

-Job done!

Selling to each other is, of course, against the rules.

So, instead, our pair of Maastricht maestros must head back to good old

Blighty and uncover their own buyers.

Using all available methods,

David and Phil will scour our green and pleasant land to find perfect

homes for all their foreign loot,

focusing on stacking up the biggest possible profits

to go to their chosen charities.

Back at his County Durham digs,

the devilish one is giving his Dutch haul some serious consideration.

I've got to say, that was an amazing experience.

My very first visit to Holland.

Look around you, I mean, come on.

Look at that face of the greyhound. She is absolutely wonderful.

I've spoken to a couple of friends of mine

that have two rescue greyhounds

that they are in love with, rightly so.

So, I think, you will be sorted, don't you worry.

The bell, I've spoken to a girl about this, she's very interested.

Her dad toured the world on ships, and she collects anything maritime.

The table is really cool.

And I know the coolest man,

and he loves Art Deco and he loves chrome and he loves black,

and I think he is going to go crazy over that table.

So, David has a few cast-iron plans up his sleeve,

but he also needs to find buyers for his late-Victorian gas kettle

and that man-bag.

At his Worcestershire lair,

Phil is perusing his pile of precious things.

They've sent me to Holland, and what do I come back with?

Well, I've got a French automobile poster.

I think I might have got that sold to a man who loves cars

and loves posters. I've got a French straw workbox.

I've got a West German pen set,

and I've got this lovely French stove,

which I thought I might struggle with,

but I've found somewhere that I think is going to give it

a perfect home.

So all I've come back with, really,

is just a little bit of Dutch courage.

Well, he may need that

as he also needs to find buyers for his salt box and vintage case.

Filled with competitive spirit,

both our eager beavers are raring to get going,

hitting the phones and the internet and the road

in a bid to turn their purchases into profit.

But, remember, no deal is sealed

until a hand is shaken and the money is taken.

And ding-dong!

Who's this, up bright and early?

Yes, David's launching his selling spree in his hometown

of Barnard Castle.

He's taking his £11 ship's bell to show antiques dealer Heidi,

and if she can't see him coming in those trousers,

she'll certainly hear him. BELL RINGS

-Ooh, hello.

-Hello, Heidi.

-Hiya, how are you?

-Very well.

-I've heard all about you.

-All good, I hope?

And what's this connection with you, Heidi, and maritime?

Have I got this right?

Um, I did spend a lot of my youth on boats, on yachts.

My dad had a boat, so we got dragged along and had many great holidays.

-We crossed the North Sea...

-No way!

-..went to Holland,

Germany, Denmark...

That's a real adventurous childhood, isn't it?

-It was a bit, yeah.

-And you're back in Barnard Castle, what went wrong?

I know, I know!

-You should be on the high seas, in Fiji or something.

-No, no.

Well, you might just be able to help me with this bell.

-OK.

-So there is the bell.

-Oh!

-Now, you say you sailed to Holland. I bought this in Holland.

-Right.

MS Bremen.

I mean, I've researched the Bremen - there's a number of them...

-Right.

-..and I don't know which one this came from.

There was a Bremen that was launched in 1896...

-Right.

-..and then dismantled in 1929,

but whether it comes from that ship or not, I'm not sure.

Why else would you have...put the name on something?

Well, it could be a vintage reproduction.

It's not a new reproduction. It's got patina.

-Mm-hm.

-It's good quality and it's made to be used.

It doesn't half ring,

and the guy I bought it off said to me that these things,

the sound would travel, in fog, one mile.

Tiny little bell...

BELL RINGS

That is loud, yeah.

-Have a feel of it.

-OK.

It would look lovely hanging on a chain.

-And one of these attached.

-Now, what's all this about, then?

You would use this, then, to swing the ding-y thing.

Swing this dingley-dongler, I think we call it in the trade.

-LAUGHS:

-I don't know!

So, what would you use it for if you fancied it?

I'm kind of half tempted to put it outside my house.

-Well, the neighbours will love you, won't they?

-Oh, they do.

When someone knocks at your door at two in the morning, bing-bong.

They're not that close!

Well, listen, it's £40.

-SHE GASPS

-Is that a lot?

Well, I thought you were going to say about 100, so...!

Talk about...falling flat on my face.

It's 140, that's what I said!

£40...

To be honest, for £40, I won't bargain with you.

-Well...

-I think £40 is a reasonable price, so I will...

-Yeah.

-Fantastic. That doesn't happen very often to me.

I've totally underpriced it.

Thank you very much, Heidi. Been an absolute delight!

David rings up a starting profit of £28.89, but is he happy?

Well, I've got to say, nice sale, lovely, fun person.

But you know what? It could have been more! Aargh!

Yes, while David goes off to add some more noughts to his price list,

Phil is at the foot of the Malvern Hills,

with the stove that cost him just over £150.

The Fox is hoping he can find a permanent home for it

with holiday park owner Jim.

You've sort of specialised in doing these wonderful

-shepherds' huts, have you?

-Absolutely, yeah.

We started off with just building the one, which I built as a hobby.

We thought we'd try and let it out, and it went really well, and this

winter we're going to build another one again,

so we'll have four altogether.

The one we're going to build this winter is going to have

-a very rustic, antique-y feel.

-Really?

-Olde-worlde.

-So this might be of interest to you?

-It could well be, yes.

And will it be a bigger hut than this or the same size?

It's going to be a little bigger.

I was thinking at first that this might be a bit too big

for a space this size, but I suppose if you've got a bigger hut,

it'll do the job, won't it?

-Especially on cold winter days.

-That's a traditional English fire,

-isn't it?

-Yeah.

-And this is a French fire.

I would imagine it's a better stove than one of those.

-I think it'll look better in here.

-It will.

I don't know what your budget is for replacing these...

They're not expensive.

See, that's not what I wanted to hear, that, really, Jim.

-It isn't?

-That's, just, no, that's not what I hear at all, really.

-What did you want to hear?

-I wanted to hear £300,

-that's what I wanted to hear, Jim.

-Did you?

-Yeah, I did.

-Right.

-OK.

-Yeah. See, it's gone quiet again, now, hasn't it?

-It's nice...

-The temperature's dropped a little...

It is nice, Philip. Would you take an offer on it?

-I suppose I would, cos I want to sell it.

-Yeah.

-What's your offer?

£240?

I think it's worth close to £300, right?

And I'd like to get as close to it as I can get,

so you make me your very best offer...

-Right.

-And I will...

It'll be a yay or a nay from me.

OK. What about, what about £250?

-Is that your best?

-I think so, yeah.

All right, OK. I'll shake your hand on that.

Thank you very much indeed. Gosh, he grabbed my hand rather quickly,

didn't he? I've just begun to wonder whether I got myself burned here.

Well, that's still a toasty £98.15 profit,

and the competition is hotting up.

Not to be outdone, dapper David has donned his man-bag,

for hopefully the last time, and catwalked over to Stockton-on-Tees.

It cost him just under £15,

so fingers crossed his man friend, Chris,

likes the man-bag.

In Holland, everybody - and I mean everybody, it's by law -

men wear man-bags.

By law, I can't believe that, but I do see it's an original.

Yes, it's vintage.

-It's very nice leather.

-Good leather.

-What sort of year?

-I would say that's 1970s to '80s, I'm guessing.

About the time I was born.

-Exactly.

-Yes.

How much would you pay for a man-bag of that size and that quality, new?

I, I think, brand-new...

-Yeah.

-Possibly around £100, £110, but it's used.

But it's got that added, kind of, extra value, because it's vintage.

OK, David, I'll make one offer.

It's a take it or leave it offer.

-OK?

-And it's £45.

Ooh... So, I will never see that man-bag ever again?

Only me wearing it.

I would like to see you wearing the man-bag.

-We have a deal?

-We've got a deal.

-We have a deal.

-Chris, you've made it.

Welcome to the world of man-bags.

Devilish reluctantly relinquishes his handbag, sorry, man-bag,

but at least he has that £30.19 profit to remember it by.

So, David's sold two items to Phil's one,

but Foxy's not in the mood to lag behind,

and is revving his engine back in Worcestershire.

I've got my really cheap car poster and I'm going to try and sell it

to a friend of mine who's got some, well, not so cheap cars.

I just hope there's a little bit of money left in his wallet that

I can try and eek out for my poster.

Well, as long as car enthusiast Will has more than £11 to spend,

Phil will be in the black.

-Nice to see you.

-How are you?

-What do you think, then?

-Well, it'd be better if you turned it round.

Well, you've seen a picture on my phone, haven't you?

-I have, definitely.

-And there's the little beastie, look.

Little, not so little.

-Nice.

-And, erm... I love it cos it's sort of...

For me, it's very evocative of those early days of motoring,

and of aviation as well.

What age would you put on it?

-The original?

-The original.

I would think the original has got to be somewhere between about

1905, 1910. I could just see,

you know, Tony Curtis driving it in The Great Race

or Those Magnificent Men And Their Flying Machines.

You know, it's that sort of era for me.

It's lovely. And I love the family looking up at the airplane.

Well, if you... The real beautiful thing about this poster is,

if you look very carefully, just down by those trees...

-Yeah.

-You've got the Malvern Hills.

How'd you know?

Well, just a little bit of artistic licence.

I do like it. It's very, very nice.

Clearly, there is no age to the poster.

I think you and I are older than this is.

And it's missing a bit of wood off the bottom.

It warrants better than languishing where I found it.

It warrants being put on a wall,

or dare I say... Your walls look pretty full right here.

But...there's a whole ceiling you haven't started, so I think...

-that this could be just bolted up there, couldn't it?

-Yeah.

I think you're right.

I'll make sure it goes somewhere where people see it.

No, it's a super picture, that is. I really like it.

Are you interested in buying it off me?

Um, well, I will for the right money, yes.

I was sort of, kind of, hoping I might get, I don't know, £40 for it?

Hm.

Yeah. How would you feel about £18?

Where the hell has £18 come from?

-£18?!

-I made it up.

-Yeah, well, make another one up.

-OK...

-I didn't like that at all.

-£15, then.

-No, no, no.

Let me just... If I could just stop you just for one minute, right?

If I could just try and explain it to you.

-You're going the wrong way.

-OK!

-The way this works,

the price is supposed to go higher, not lower.

OK, let's say, then, how would you feel about £20?

I don't think too much to £20, Willie, cos it's a lot...

I mean, you're going up in twos, here.

I tell you what, I know you're a fair man,

bearing in mind I asked for £40,

you give me what you think your best shot is.

-£25.

-And that's your best shot?

-Yep.

-Go on, I'll take you.

That haggle went up, down, flying around,

but magnificent Phil ends up pocketing a steady profit

of £13.89.

But, it seems, his work here is not yet done.

While you're hanging around,

how about giving my car a bit of a polish?

-You what?

-And don't... Do it properly, this time, as well.

The things I have to do!

Mind you, I'm sort of polishing a profit, here.

Use some elbow grease, Phil! Yes.

Let's catch up with David, who's gone walkies down south

to Buckinghamshire with his terracotta greyhound.

You know, I've got to tell you,

I'm really growing quite attached to this little greyhound.

She really is absolutely gorgeous.

I've come to see a friend of mine, Anthony, who, like me,

is a big dog lover, but he has a particular passion

for greyhounds, so I'm hoping

he's going to give this gorgeous little creature a really happy home.

Whether David can sniff out a profit

rather depends on Anthony and his doggies,

Swift Chocolate Orange and Polaris, taking a shine to her.

So they're both rescue dogs, aren't they?

-They are.

-You are gorgeous, you really are!

Now, talking of gorgeous creatures, I mean...

Could you get any more gorgeous than the creature that I purchased,

with you in mind, whilst in Maastricht?

Have you seen this, Orange? What do you reckon to that?

"It's great!"

-Um...

-Well, look, I mean, what it is, it's a vintage

glazed terracotta model of...

I'm guessing the model is of a greyhound.

It could be. I think it's either a greyhound,

an Italian greyhound, or a whippet.

It's probably more whippet-like, I think.

Although the paws are very large.

I don't think it's a very tasteful piece.

-Don't you?

-No, not really.

Oh. So, hang on a minute.

I'm getting the idea that you don't particularly like the model

of my little greyhound. Is that true?

-No, it's not appealing to me at all.

-It's not appealing to you, OK.

Is there going to be some good news?

Yes, it does interest me.

-OK.

-I would like to buy it from you, but then donate it to a charity,

for them to raise funds for greyhounds.

-OK.

-I would certainly think that an auction would find someone

a little more appreciative of it.

So, I'm going to try and sell you something

that you really don't like,

but you want to donate to a really good cause.

Listen, she owes me almost nothing.

£15, or something.

-I'll offer you £50 for it.

-DAVID GASPS

We'll have to high-five on that.

Well, without even needing to beg, roll over or play dead,

David managed to make £35.19 profit.

And that complete turnaround brings us to the halfway mark.

It's been a busy first half of selling

and a closely contended fight so far, but who is in the lead?

Well, that's what David and Phil want to know.

So they've been given a chance to meet up and find out who's been

pocketing the most profits so far.

-Good to see you in London.

-How are you?

-Well, not that good.

-Really?

-It's just been a disaster from start to finish.

-Really?

I really feel down.

-I know I can talk to you.

-I hate it when you're down.

-I know, cos you're nice like that.

-Yeah.

-I appreciate it.

-How down are you?

-Very down.

-Really?

-Yeah.

Sad, that! I mean, sorry. That's awful, that, David. Don't get down.

-Shall we see how we're doing?

-Yeah. No, don't get down. Oh!

What's that say?

So far in the competition, you have made more profit than your opponent.

-I told you.

-You're down, aren't you?

-It's all downhill for me now.

-I'm over!

-I hate it when you're down.

-Oh, thanks, Phil.

-Shall I take that?

-Yeah, would you mind? Just take that away.

He's really down, he is. He's really, really down.

Well, let's see just how far ahead Phil is.

Trailing slightly, David has sold three items,

making a profit of £94.27.

But, in the lead, Phil has only sold two items,

but notched up more profit, just over £112.

I can't believe it! I was only pretending to be worried.

I've been making some cracking profits

and if Philip Serrell is beating me,

it means I've really got to double the ante. Thanks, Phil.

Yes, David must now dig deep and fight

for that extra profit to overtake his rival.

Now, back in Worcestershire,

profit rocket Phil is keen to increase his lead, so has

invited pen collector Jonathan to his saleroom to see if his German

scribblers, that cost just over £22, can mark up a bigger margin.

Thank you for coming. Well, first off, how many pens have you got?

About 1,000.

What's the Holy Grail of pen collecting?

For me, this pen here. This is a 1937 Onoto Magna.

The nib is a two-tone gold.

That's a beautiful thing, isn't it?

This is one of my favourite pens.

Oxo, I believe, did a competition for schoolchildren.

And if you got commended in your handwriting,

they sent you a pen.

And the great thing about that is it's got the box

and the original postage, which says

October 1936.

And it's immaculate.

And that, to me, is a wonderful piece of history.

-So how much was that?

-That was £20.

Would you like to see an old one?

-Yeah.

-So, this is a 1905

-sterling silver marked one.

-May I look?

Now, what would the value of something like that be?

That one is about £300.

-Why?

-Because it's...cos it's so fine.

So, now, tell me about these. Tell me how old they are.

Yeah, I would think '70s, '80s.

-Yeah.

-Um, not totally mass produced,

but certainly more produced than those type.

What might you bid for those, at auction, do you think?

I would hope to get them for around about the £60-£70 mark.

OK. HOPE to. That means you might pay a bit more, doesn't it?

-MIGHT do.

-If I asked you for £90 for those, would that be excessive?

That would be excessive. I wouldn't be able to go to £90.

-Would you be able to go to £80?

-I will give you £80 for those.

-Really?

-Cos they're nice pens, and I'll keep them in my collection.

-And you're happy with that?

-I'm happy with that.

-You're a gentleman. Thank you very much.

-Pleasure.

Phil writes up a neat profit of just under £58.

And, keen to add even more money to his coffer,

sells his mid-19th century salt box to antiques dealer Ian,

in Worcestershire...

-I could push you to £70.

-Can I shake your hand, my friend?

-Good man.

-Thank you very much.

-Thank you, Phil.

..sprinkling another £58.89

on top of his ever-growing pile of well-earned riches.

Now, rather surprisingly for a man with, shall we say, very short hair,

David is in London to see hairdresser Stuart Phillips.

But no, he's not here to get a cut, he's here to MAKE a cut,

on the Art Deco table that cost him just over £37.

-Now, you love glamour.

-Yes.

You love style and fashion. What are your favourite colours?

-Black, silver, chrome-y, sparkly. A bit like the salon, really.

-Yeah.

Perfect. And that's why, when I saw that little Art Deco table

-in Maastricht, I thought of you.

-Did you?

-I did!

-It's actually really... Can I grab it?

-Go for it.

-Do you know what, David? You got the colours almost bang on.

-Almost?

-Love the chrome.

-Good.

-Love the black.

-Yeah.

I'm not 100% sure on the brown.

OK. Do we chop that off, then, Stuart?

Do you have another table top?

No, I do actually really like this table.

I actually really do like it.

-Now, how old is it?

-It's a genuine, in-period Art Deco piece.

You know, the Art Deco period officially started in 1925

with the Paris Arts and Decorative Fair.

And then it ends, really, at the beginning of the Second World War,

'39, so this dates positively...

-Yeah.

-..to '25 to '39.

This, you know, has lived in Holland

-during the war.

-Really?

-This has seen an awful lot of interesting,

historical events unfold.

And to make that to that standard and sell it in a nice shop,

-it's going to be £700 or £800.

-Yeah.

-At that quality.

-Yeah.

But that's, as an original vintage thing,

it's £85.

As soon as I saw it, the first thing I said was, "I want it."

-That was the first thing I said.

-Good.

What do you think about the price? Do you think it's surprisingly cheap?

-Yes, I do.

-Yeah.

-I thought it was going to be more than that, yes.

Yeah. Well, I'd like to think, then,

-that you think it's good value at 85.

-No, I do.

-So...

-Do we have a deal at 85?

-We do have a deal, sir.

-Stuart, you are an absolute gentleman.

-Pleasure, mate.

That's a snip under £48 profit, and everybody's happy.

Our dealers are neck and neck at four items each.

And hoping to make it five is Mr Serrell,

who's in Malvern with his straw box.

He's rather cleverly targeted hay and straw dealer Alan

as a possible buyer,

but can he rake in more than the £14.81 he forked out?

Mr Hughes, how are you?

-Philly!

-Good to see you, my friend.

-Lovely to meet you.

-I'm a farmer's son, you know,

so all this brings back memories to me...

-Wow.

-And I can remember, as an 11-year-old, my job,

my dad's smallholding...

-Yes.

-..was to drive the truck around the fields,

and they'd be loading hay and straw.

Now, what I've brought you is this little chap here, look.

-Oh, yes?

-Now, there's an interesting story behind these, because...

..in the Napoleonic wars, prisoners of war,

to augment their really meagre food rations, they used to make things.

-Yes?

-And they used to make straw workboxes, just like this.

-Well...

-Now, this is a later one. This isn't an original one.

If it was an original one I should be asking an awful lot of money.

-Yes...

-But, if you look at it,

-you can see all the different strands of straw.

-My goodness,

-gracious me...

-Right? Straw is almost tubular, isn't it?

It is. Oh, yes, it's tubular. It's hollow. Yes.

It's hollow. So, what they did is they got a splitter...

And they split the straw, and then you just...

-You'd have different...

-Yeah.

-..pieces of it, just like that.

-Yeah, I see. Yeah.

-And you just, sort of, lay it on, like that.

-Yeah, yeah, yeah, I see.

And then you've got different colours, and you can try and dye them.

That is incredible, isn't it?

-Did you know that?

-No, I didn't know that.

I can feel the different strands in it, actually.

-It's quite a nice little thing, isn't it?

-It is indeed.

And have you seen anything like this before?

I have never, ever seen or heard of this before.

And it's very fitting in our business, isn't it?

I was hoping I might get around £50 for it.

Well! Were you?

Yeah. It's much, much better to travel in hope

than arrive in disappointment.

Well, I think I'm really, very interested in this little box,

but I think we're just getting a little bit high in the clouds

money, Philip, you know, for me.

Would you accept £40 for it?

I will, sir. You're a gentleman.

Thank you very much. Thank you.

I tell you what, then, you go and put that on the shelf

-and I'll carry on doing what you were doing.

-OK.

Aw! Phil bales up a profit of just over £25,

and gets to relive his farming youth.

Now, David is still in London and has decided to visit

the Vestry House Museum in Wolthamstow.

He wants to find out more about his Victorian gas kettle

so he can maximise its selling potential.

He's meeting assistant curator Gary.

The Victorians were brilliant at inventing stuff.

I mean, it was almost a fashion, wasn't it?

-In the late 19th century.

-Yes, it was.

Things were coming out every week, almost.

-Yeah.

-And, you know, to have the most up-to-date sort of thing

that was on the market, just the same as it is today.

So these are our collection of irons.

In the early Victorian period, obviously, it would be heated

-on the range.

-Yeah.

-So then we move onto what?

-You can see the electric iron, the gas iron.

Interesting, because it's the same period as my kettle.

-Exactly, yes.

-1890.

-About that. About 1900, perhaps.

-Yeah?

-And it didn't last very long, did it?

-No, I think definitely

the electric one outlived the gas,

-but possibly the gas was dangerous, so...

-I would've thought so.

Yes.

The first domestic gas supplies were extracted from coal

and did indeed lead to more house fires.

But, despite the dangers,

having it piped to the door was a modern convenience

no self-respecting middle class home was without.

-This is a Victorian parlour.

-It's a reproduction of about 1880,

what life would've been like in a sort of middle class parlour.

It's a fascinating period - the British Empire,

the last days of Queen Victoria.

And I think my kettle here, that I bought in Maastricht,

falls into that category. I mean, that is very bang on trend,

-we might say.

-Absolutely, yeah.

1890, Arts and Crafts.

-Yep.

-No doubt made for a very wealthy person, I'm guessing.

Certainly. There was always a kettle in the kitchen,

but then there was a better quality kettle

probably up in the dining room.

If you were entertaining,

you would have your own tea service and kettle.

-It was a real showy-off bit of kit, that.

-It's wonderful, isn't it?

Have you ever seen one before?

I've never come across a gas one.

We've got these electric kettles from the 1920s.

That, I must admit, is the first gas one I've ever seen.

-That is definitely museum quality, isn't it?

-It certainly is.

So, it seems David may have quite an unusual piece

of Victorian innovation on his hands.

That should push up the price. And talking of making money,

Phil is on the case in Malvern with his vintage, uh, case.

It cost just over £37, so he's hoping antiques dealer Jeremy

can dig a little deeper.

Jeremy, how are you?

-I tell you what, you've got a job.

-Just tidying it up.

I tell you what, do you want to have just a quick...?

-Yeah, well, why not?

-Shoulders.

-A bit there.

-A quick...?

-No, I can't do them with that.

-OK.

Um...

-I came up and saw you the other day.

-Yep.

-And said I'd got a suitcase for you.

-Yes, you did.

-There's the beast.

-Right.

-Nice looking case.

-Well, I bought it in Holland.

I just thought it was a really nice case.

-A vanity case, I would think.

-Righto.

-Cos there's a mirror in there.

-Yeah.

Which I'd probably take out and throw away.

No. Nice mirror, nice mirror.

-Would you use it?

-Yeah, yeah.

-There's a few bits missing inside.

-Yeah. When I bought it,

I sort of toyed with the idea of getting it relined.

-I just thought it would make it more usable.

-No, I'd just leave it.

-Would you?

-Yeah, leave it alone.

Let somebody else do it if they want to do it. Other than that,

mirror's nice. Original mirror. Yeah, that's a nice case.

-Well, I thought it was a really lovely case.

-Yeah.

And you could use it as a small weekend case.

But I also thought, you know, I could see a businessman using it.

-Yeah. It'll probably be a young girl that buys that.

-Really?

-Yep.

Put her things in for the weekend.

That's who we sell them to, yep.

-A few bashes. That actually adds to it.

-Really?

I'd have bashed it a bit more if I'd known that.

-So it's of interest to you?

-Yes, it certainly is, yeah.

OK. I bought it for the thick end of £40,

and ideally I'd like to double my money.

It's a bit tight at that.

-Go on, then.

-I see it at about 50.

Where's the about come into it?

Might be a touch more.

-55 quid?

-Yeah.

-You happy with that?

-If you're happy with it.

-Yeah, yeah, absolutely, right.

-Thank you very much.

-Thank you.

Phil packs a profit of just under £18, and that was his final item.

Well, that's me all sold up,

and I've really enjoyed it. I just hope I've got enough in the bank

to beat Mr Harper.

Well, it's not long till we find out.

David just has to shift his last item -

the Victorian gas kettle.

He's been told it's quite a rare piece

so has been honing his sales pitch

and thinks Bloomsbury cafe boss Toby will be the perfect new owner.

Remember, it cost just under £93,

so it's full steam ahead.

Here we are in London. I mean, this is cafe society.

-Yes.

-You know, people are spending long hours chatting.

-That's right.

And Bloomsbury, traditionally, you know, the Bloomsbury set

with their coffees and their hot chocolates.

Didn't seem to hurt their literature,

-so we're very proud to be Bloomsbury.

-I'm sure it helped.

It's all that...that social inter-reaction

-stimulates the old brain, doesn't it?

-It certainly does.

-The little grey cells.

-So you have a love of tea?

-Big tea lover.

-Cos that's why I'm here.

I want to introduce you to something that, actually, is very, genuinely,

very special, and designed for hot water for drinks,

but I think there is much more going on there.

Interestingly, my kettle took me on a visit to a museum,

and we've talked about how people were socialising

-during this period, which is about 1890.

-Wow.

-So it's a proper antique.

It's got that Arts and Crafts kind of shape...

-Yeah.

-But, bearing in mind it's well over 100 years,

-it still has a modern look.

-It does, and it's very brassy.

-Very brassy.

-Which goes with the sort of livery we've got going here.

We've got a few bits of brass...

-Yeah.

-So that, that could fit in, and we have an awful lot of teas.

-Well, it's a talking point, that's what it is.

-Yeah.

And what's really doubly interesting and I think makes it actually

of a museum standard, genuinely, is this tap down here.

-Yeah, I was wondering about that.

-Yeah, it's a gas tap.

-My goodness. So you light it and then keep it warm?

-Yeah.

It's something that somebody with plenty of money

would have in their living room, in their drawing room,

-in their entertaining room.

-Yeah.

And they would literally plug the blighter into a gas pipe

-in the wall, in the days when only the super rich had gas.

-Yeah.

If you were living in 1890, if you had that, you were uber cool.

-Can I pick it up, have a look?

-Go for it.

-Thanks.

-The kettle will come away.

-Oh, yeah... Oh, OK.

-Yeah.

So, it's definitely solid brass, then?

Oh, oh, completely.

I mean, really well constructed. Look at the rivets, here.

-Yeah.

-So, when we talk about Arts and Crafts,

we talk about something that is fundamentally handmade.

Cool, and it's definitely had quite a bit of use.

And you talk about the Bloomsbury set, this was certainly in existence

and probably being used at the same time the Bloomsbury set were doing

all of what they were doing right here, within a stone's throw,

-weren't they?

-Wow, yeah.

And the building itself is roughly the same age as this.