The Commonwealth of Burns

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face

Great chieftain o...

Why can't they write "nice"?

Tonight, along with hundreds of thousands of people unnamed

throughout the world, we remember one of the most fascinating

and absorbing human beings who ever lived. Robert Burns.

Perhaps surprisingly, Burns suppers are still being held

in the furthest-flung corners of the Commonwealth.

From the Caribbean to shores of India,

and from West Africa to the very Far East.

In the year that Scotland welcomed 71 nations to Glasgow

for the Commonwealth Games,

what does the most famous Scot of all time mean to that Commonwealth?

When I read Robert Burns, it's a chance for me to look back

and see where I come from.

I would imagine he would like seeing all these people

from all over the world enjoying food...

You sacrificed a haggis.

..speeches, poetry...

Cock up your beaver.

WOMAN SNIGGERS

I could imagine he would get a kick out of that.

We can be Scottish with apology to nobody.

I am very Scottish. I am not Sri Lankan.

Whisky will be available while Scots last...stocks last.

Oh, dear. CROWD LAUGH

I understand Burns, the strong connection, the poetry, the linkage.

For me, it's just the connection with home.

Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you now to fill your glasses,

raise them as high as you can

as I give you the immortal memory of Robert Burns.

Painch, trai... This isn't even English!

Where the Ghanaian Burns Supper begins is actually in snowy London.

Because the Scottish ingredients needed for the dinner can be

tricky to find in warmer climates.

Fortunately Steven Grey, the chieftain of the Burns Supper,

works for a British company in Africa.

So, on a trip back to the UK, he picks up the haggis.

All 36kg of it.

I love a haggis.

Especially with a bit of Scotch sauce drizzled over the top.

Ghana's natural resources of gold and oil

have been bringing Brits to the country for centuries.

Today, the country has one of the fastest-growing economies in the world.

So there's still a strong community of Scottish expats

in the capital, Accra.

4,000 miles later, Steve and the haggis arrive at the hotel

for this Saturday's supper.

It's the moment the chef has been waiting for.

-Fantastic, fantastic.

-Look after it well.

-I will.

My precious cargo. The ceremonial haggis.

CHEF CHUCKLES

Very nice! I like it.

This most Scottish of dishes will be prepared in Ghana by Walt,

the chef, who's Swiss.

The biggest challenge was really to get the haggis.

We started about three months ago, looking for it.

There we go. The haggis has arrived.

The organiser was in Scotland. He organised the whole thing.

He goes to Customs,

they look inside and said, "What's that?"

"It's a very, very special sausage.

"With a whole lot of... intestines in it."

And when they heard intestines, they said,

"Fantastic, take it. Go through."

This is the Caledonian Society dance class.

And it's our last chance to get our feet doing the correct steps,

and our body in the correct position for the dances on Saturday night.

TRADITIONAL SCOTTISH MUSIC

Shetland-born Brenda Sowah has spent 40 years in Accra,

having fallen in love with a Ghanaian man and African culture.

But even after all these years,

Brenda has never forgotten her ceilidh steps.

Up...

Robert Burns was a great womaniser and very romantic.

And there's nothing more romantic than dancing a dance well

with a gentlemen whose company you enjoy.

DANCE MUSIC

There's a lot of nuance in everything you say in Rabbie Burns.

It's all love and lust, and drink, and so on.

And Ghanaians love dancing. They love their beer.

I don't know how they get on with the haggis.

With just a couple of days until the supper,

Brenda is on a quest to find the Ghanaian version of a tartan accessory.

We've got a big Scottish function on Saturday, called Burns Night.

-We have a tie also from Kente.

-Kente tie.

Ghanaians wear the Kente cloth.

And the Kente cloth looks remarkably similar to Scottish tartan.

Have you ever heard the bagpipes,

the Scottish national musical instrument?

-No, no.

-No? It's the pipes that they play.

-OK, yeah.

-Then they pump.

BAGPIPE MUSIC

The Colombo Burns Supper has brought piper Lee Moore

5,500 miles to Sri Lanka.

It's a great coup for Shalini -

one of the organisers of this weekend's supper -

as she discovered a love for the bagpipes whilst living in Scotland.

I think we're more a Scottish colony than British colony.

Because the Scottish tea planters settled here,

we've got estates called Edinburgh, Glasgow, Galloway...

Clydesdale, Culloden.

# Hello, everyone

# Hello, everyone

# Glad that you are here... #

Shalini works with schools in the most rural parts of Sri Lanka

as a charity coordinator. Through music,

she tries to connect the communities left divided by the civil war.

BAGPIPES PLAY

We often have Scottish visitors, so the children know about the kilts,

and they know about Scotland.

Today, to hear a musical instrument from Scotland is special.

MUSIC: "Ye Banks and Braes"

This was a tune that one of our trustees suggested.

And she said, "I think

"Ye Banks and Braes o' Bonnie Doon has got to be the tune."

So that's how it came to be.

It's very hard to explain the meaning of.

Lost to me down the banks of bonnie Doon.

Ironically, the Burns Supper this weekend will be Shalini's

first outside of Scotland.

She and her family moved to Edinburgh for a short time,

but fell in love with Scotland and decided to stay

until her children had finished school.

Having returned recently after 15 years away,

Shalini is well aware of how different Sri Lanka is now

to the country she left.

I was very privileged because I did a masters at Edinburgh University

in the Department of Education. If you compare it to here,

this hasn't changed, the setting of these classrooms.

We don't have those privileges here.

MUSIC: "Auld Lang Syne"

What we really valued about Scotland was the strong sense of community.

And that's what made us feel so welcome.

And encouraged us to stay.

So moving back here six months ago was very, very hard.

I do miss it terribly.

Scottish links to the island of Sri Lanka go back at least 200 years,

when it was then known as Ceylon.

The tea trade was founded by a young Scotsman,

which transformed the fortunes of the country.

In the heart of downtown Colombo there's still evidence

of that connection - a Scots kirk, a Scots minister

and a scout group with a very Scottish name.

-Gold star awards.

-Wow. Show me the badges.

Good afternoon.

I've always had an interest in the wider world.

So my life has consisted of periods in Scotland and periods abroad.

We share a mentality with Sri Lankans.

Sri Lanka is a small country beside a big country.

Scotland has always been a small country beside a bigger country.

Sri Lanka produces tea. Scotland produces whisky.

So we produce very popular beverages.

And Sri Lankans are very religious and ritualistic people.

They appreciate rituals.

And I think that's why they can key into what we do in a Burns Supper.

They like the address to the haggis. They like the bagpipes.

They like the dressing up.

It's only Jesus of Nazareth and Robert Burns, as far as I know,

who are remembered at a meal table.

BRASS BAND PLAYS

400 years ago,

Scots were among the first to land on the remote island of Bermuda.

And still nearly 5,000 of the island's population of 66,000

are Scots and their descendents.

Even the island's new governor is Scottish.

Officer Mark Lavery is first-generation Bermudian.

But his father grew up in Glasgow's East End.

SOLDIERS: Left, one, two!

The vast majority of Bermudian men are required

to serve in our standing military through balloted conscription.

It's a very Burnsian organisation when you think about it in that way,

because it's a great leveller. People come together from all walks of life.

From all parts of the island.

And you get an opportunity to meet people

that you never would have met in other ways.

Diving in at the Burns deep-end, Mark is preparing to deliver

the centrepiece of the supper - The Immortal Memory.

When I was first given the opportunity to deliver

the Immortal Memory at the Burns Night supper,

it seemed a bit of a daunting task.

My father had been given a book of poetry from Robert Burns,

and I remember the first poem I heard was him reading out

Scots Wha Hae. I didn't quite get what it meant.

It was as if he was speaking a different language,

but it was almost familiar.

This isn't the stuff that I hear at school.

This isn't the almost impenetrable words of Shakespeare.

This is something that's familiar, that's lively,

that I get what's being said, even if I don't understand the words.

There's always a sense of...

..longing.

Of looking back on his life and trying to figure out who he is.

Advance!

Trying to figure out what it means to be Scottish, or what it means

to be a member of any society, or a member of any group.

SOLDIERS: One, two, three, one!

SALSA MUSIC

Motherwell-born Claire Hattie has spent seven years in Bermuda.

She now works in advertising and marketing, which helps

when you're trying to organise a Burns Supper for 200 guests.

Scottish people love singing about being miles across the ocean.

We love singing songs about being far away from home.

Let's face it, it's a pretty cool culture.

It's a cool nationality to have. We've got the whole,

you know, as soon as you say you're Scottish,

people imagine you as this kilted warrior.

Well, maybe not me specifically.

Bermuda's a small island. It's only 21 square miles.

My first impressions were just - wow, it's so beautiful here.

There's just turquoise and pink everywhere.

The most beautiful beaches I've ever seen.

But it's funny how quickly it becomes your normal life.

You can get most of the stuff from home.

There seem to be a lot of Scottish butchers here.

You can get square sausages in the supermarket.

You can get shortbread. You can get haggis.

You can even get Irn Bru, which is great

if you have had a few too many rum swizzles the night before.

SALSA MUSIC

I think you get more of an appreciation for Burns

the older you get.

I remember in school when you have it rammed down your throat a little bit,

and your teachers say, "What did Burns mean by this phrase?"

And you're thinking, oh, he's probably drunk,

he didn't mean anything by it.

10,000 miles east of Bermuda, the Scots legacy in Singapore goes back

to colonial days when it was the Empire's fortress in the Far East.

Today, Singapore is a global financial centre.

But, high in the hills above the city, there's a place that

the small yet committed community of British expats can still call home.

I think the expats don't particularly mix with the Singaporeans.

But each country, I think, has its own little club.

The St Andrew's Society obviously for the Scots.

It can be a lonely time for the expat wife.

Children are perhaps out at school all day,

your husband's out at work, and that's where I think the societies

and clubs are very good,

because you can go along and meet people that way.

Elspeth left Glasgow in 1982 and hasn't lived in Scotland since then,

having followed her husband's job to the Tropics.

Robert Burns lived in a male-dominated world,

so would probably have been surprised to find that,

in Singapore, it's the lassies who are in control

of this weekend's supper.

That's a tricky one.

There isn't actually a kilt hire shop in Singapore.

Does he have a ticket already for the Burns Supper?

Because it is fully booked.

Coming to Singapore was the first time I attended a Burns Supper.

Obviously we'll be doing that again in a few days.

It was also the first time I tried curling.

I came all the way over to Singapore, to the Tropics,

to actually try curling for the first time.

People who ask me if I'm English, or what part of England I come from,

I always correct them.

I'm Scottish and I'm proud to be Scottish.

The chieftain of this weekend's Burns Supper is, of course,

another Scot - Tricia Forrester -

who grew up in small town near Alloa.

My husband's job brought the family to Singapore.

The first instinct is to say, "No, I've no idea where Singapore is."

The choice was - you see your husband 50% of the time, cos he's travelling,

or you see him 75%-80% of the time, if you move lock, stock and barrel.

You miss the hills. You definitely miss the seasons here in Singapore.

The distance does make a big difference to how you feel.

I know that when I'm celebrating Burns this weekend,

my mum would go, "What, haggis? No!"

So, yes, she's living there in Central Scotland.

We're just getting more Scottish the further away we get.

In Singapore, the chieftain only has one year in charge.

And so Tricia is determined to look the part at this weekend's supper.

I have several tartan outfits here in Singapore,

but no, I don't think I owned anything tartan

since the age of eight, when my mum made me wear the kilt to school.

-That's nice.

-This is it?

-Yes, excellent.

This is my skirt for Saturday night's Burns Supper.

I had given a little St Andrew's Society tartan

to find cloth for the skirt. The red and white are for Singapore.

The blue and white are for the Saltire.

The green line here is to represent the jungle that we're surrounded by,

and there's a pale blue line here

because we're a little island surrounded by the sea.

OK, I'll put that one on.

Yeah, it's good.

I just hope the top fits. I've not had it on since November.

SHE LAUGHS

-Hello, guys!

-Hi, how are you doing?

-Come in.

The women of the committee do all the work themselves.

And in the last meeting before the supper,

they even have to hand-make 200 programmes for the event.

-A lot of them were stag when I was young.

-Yeah, exactly.

You'd have to be a man to get to Burns Suppers.

I think Mother was pleased I became more Scottish when I came here.

-Yes.

-She seemed so happy we went back to our Scottish roots.

And did she forgive you for marrying an Englishman?

THEY LAUGH

The evening is dedicated to Rabbie Burns, but it's just an excuse for us

here in Singapore to all get together with our national costumes on and...

Just remember our roots.

MUSIC: "Amazing Grace"

Hello. Hi!

Back in Colombo, the St Andrew's Scots Kirk hosts more Sri Lankans

than it does Scots.

Although there are great historical ties between the countries,

the community of Scottish expats is dwindling.

There are only around 30 Scots left in Colombo.

Lead us through the times...

Like most Scots, I've been familiar with Burns since my childhood.

Burns resonates. He talks about the realities of Scottish life,

sense of commitment to one's own country.

But also, an awareness of the wider world.

It's my experience, you go anywhere in the world

and you'll hear Bob Marley. No Woman, No Cry.

I think Burns was the kind of Bob Marley of his day.

Tomorrow's Burns Supper will be John's last in Sri Lanka.

As he gets ready to retire to Largs, in Scotland,

he has to begin breaking the news to his congregation.

Good afternoon. I'm your late minister.

-Hi.

-Hi.

-How are you doing? All right?

-I'm jogging along.

-I'm going to be leaving in August.

-For good?

-I'm afraid so.

-No!

-Yes, I'm going to retire.

-No, no, no.

-Yes.

Another minister will come.

-It won't be the same.

-OK. I'll be 65.

-That's nothing, 65!

-That's young.

-I know it's nothing compared with you,

but we feel we've done what God sent us to do.

It's time for someone else to come.

About 50 years ago you'd have had to be Scottish

to be in the Caledonian Society. We've changed since then.

And we have had discussions in the past about the chieftain.

Certainly the Sri Lankans on our committee have always insisted

that the chieftain has to be Scottish.

The man who'll replace John as the chieftain is Gordon -

one of the only Scots left on the Burns Committee.

I went to one of the balls.

It was quite funny watching the local guys as we pulled up

to traffic lights. Me sitting in a three-wheeler, full kilt.

-Fully dressed up. Plaid. And full-size claymore.

-HE LAUGHS

I first left Scotland when I was 21. I think I've had a flag in my car,

irrespective of where I've been.

It's nice because people come up and talk to you, ask you what it is.

It's like another wee connection with home. There's one in the front.

There's one in the back.

We're on a little street called Chandra Wettasingha.

I guess it's the closest to the leafy suburbs of Colombo.

Gordon first came to Sri Lanka in 1994,

and has been living and working between the two countries

ever since, managing a swimwear company.

Scotland's home. You know, I go there as often as I can.

A lot of people say, as expatriates

they enjoy the country that they're in,

which I do, but I know I'll go home.

Scotland, for me, is the place I'll finish up.

This is the Colombo Swimming Club -

a colonial club that was built for the tea plantation owners -

so they could come from the mountains

and spend time relaxing in Colombo.

We were members here the last time we lived in Sri Lanka.

Our kids pretty much grew up here on weekends.

The Scottish connection here's great.

David Wilkie was here.

He spent a lot of time and trained here as a young kid.

So, for me, to be here, as a Scot,

and actually stumble across this place was interesting.

I've been lucky to travel on business in a lot of places

and what's amazing is, wherever you go,

as soon as you mention you're Scottish, it's like, ah, you know,

"I'm a second descendant of," or "my grandma is..."

There's an element of that here in Sri Lanka as well.

What we have here is a few bits of memorabilia

for the Caledonian Society.

Looking through the book,

I stumbled across a number of pages where people actually

come from Larkhall, which is where I grew up in Scotland.

This is a record of a football game. It was England versus Scotland.

This was held in November 1944.

And I'm pleased to say that Scotland won 3-2.

HE LAUGHS

I'd love to think my son Connor would connect with

the Caledonian Society, with the whole Scottish theme. Who knows?

Maybe he'll pick up on that. It would be nice.

He's English though, he was born in Nottingham.

HE LAUGHS

Back in Ghana,

the committee is making the hooch for the Burns Supper.

It's their very own version of the old Scots concoction,

Atholl Brose - a mix of oatmeal, honey, cream and lots of whisky.

I've started getting the squelchy bits out.

We make it in a bin.

I'm sure it's perfect.

Whoa!

Feel like the Witches of Eastwick.

But, for Scots in Ghana, the supper isn't just a time to celebrate,

it's also a time to contribute to the country they're in.

More than a quarter of Ghanaians live on less than £1 a day.

So this Saturday they hope to raise thousands of dollars

for the aptly named Burns and Plastic Surgery Centre

at Korle Bu Hospital - established by a Scottish surgeon.

There was no centre in the whole of West Africa

which treated disabled people, badly burned children, adults,

people who were involved in car accidents, there was no centre.

And therefore, this was something that was needed.

Chieftain Steve has gone along to the unit

to find out what the Burns Supper can raise money for this weekend.

Last year they donated 25,000

to buy much-needed supplies for the plastic surgery unit.

Because of the discovery of oil and gas, we're getting

a lot more injuries from explosions

and fires from petrochemical products.

So that's now accounting for about 30%-35% of our caseload of burns.

-These are the new patient monitors that we donated in November?

-Yes.

OK. We have another fundraising event this weekend,

where we're hoping to raise funds for more equipment for the recovery room.

Despite the popular belief of us being mean, tight,

Scots are very generous people.

CHANTERS PLAY SCOTLAND THE BRAVE

Of all the instruments in the world,

the lads in the Singaporean Boys Brigade have to learn the bagpipes.

THEY CONTINUE PLAYING

And tomorrow, the youngest member of the group - 11-year-old Ranen Tan -

will be going along to the Burns Supper for the first time

to pipe in the guests.

When I first saw bagpipes, I thought it was very inspirational.

And I was curious about how it could make that loud sound.

I usually practise at home.

I just shut the room door and just pick it up and play.

BAND PLAYS

I didn't know much about Scotland before,

but now I know much about its tradition, and its Highland bagpipes.

I don't know much about the haggis but I know it's a meat.

What appears to be a recurring theme for all the Burns Suppers

is finding the haggis.

In Singapore it's been stashed away for months in a cupboard

in Chieftain Tricia's bedroom.

Getting the haggis into Singapore has been a bit of a nightmare.

In recent years we've had consignments blown up,

they incinerated it at the harbour.

We've not had the proper food licence or vet licence

that Singapore Customs would like you to have.

So we spend a lot of time asking people back home

when they're visiting to smuggle it into their suitcase.

It's always a bit touch and go

whether we're going to have enough each year.

The label had said "huggis" - misspelling.

And we presume they thought it was diapers.

So we got it no problem. Heavy nappies.

SHE LAUGHS

BAGPIPE MUSIC

The Bermudian piper who'll be playing in the haggis tomorrow

comes from the island's pipe band.

A committed group of people from around the Commonwealth,

absolutely none of whom are Scots.

So they've incorporated a uniquely Caribbean element

into their preparations for the Burns Supper.

Right, here we go. Go!

BAND PLAYS TRADITIONAL SCOTTISH TUNE

The pipe band's been going since the middle '50s.

We went to tour Scotland

and ended up going to the World Championships,

Pipe Band Championships, which was held in Bellahouston Park in Glasgow.

Lo and behold, we won a prize. We won the prize for

the best pipe band from overseas.

Best spelled O-N-L-Y.

I think we were about fifth-last.

The band's lead drummer - 69-year-old Peter Profit -

was born in Florida, but having been exposed to a bit of Scottish culture,

has developed a penchant for tartan.

I have four kilts in different tartans.

Anybody's allowed to wear a kilt.

It's just that you must remember it is the flag of that clan.

There's two Bermuda tartans.

-They're not in here, but...

-That's one there.

It's amazing to wear a kilt.

And you want to get into the underneath part of it?

HE LAUGHS

It's actually optional.

And I won't tell you why I don't go naked,

but I just think it's more comfortable.

TRADITIONAL SCOTTISH MUSIC

You're not supposed to go naked

when you're doing Highland games or dancing.

Or marching. Cos when you march, your knee comes up like this.

So, hello.

TRADITIONAL SCOTTISH MUSIC

Went to an opera concert here in Bermuda

and the guest of honour was Michael Douglas's wife.

Zeta whatsherface, the Welsh girl.

We both went outside to smoke.

And they were staring at me.

Hollywood star, formal Scottish dress -

no contest.

That was terrific.

Back in the early '70s, Bruce Murray married a Bermudian girl

and followed her to the island.

After 40 years away from his native Aberdeen, Bruce still loves

two of Scotland's gifts to the world -

golf and Robert Burns. At tomorrow's Burns Supper,

he'll be leading the celebrations of the bard.

Scotland has punched above its weight for so many years.

What has Scotland given the world?

What has that tiny little nation at the far end of Europe

given the world?

Robert Burns is one of the achievements of Scots.

Robert Burns is one of the reasons why Scots are Scottish abroad.

Who speaks for the common man with a louder, stronger voice than Burns?

Absolutely nobody.

And I think that must be one of the major reasons

why he is still so popular today.

And why today he's still so universally admired.

And why today Burns Day is celebrated around the world.

Still thou art blest, compar'd wi' me

The present only toucheth thee

But, Och! I backward cast my e'e

On prospects drear!

An' forward, tho' I canna see

I guess an' fear!

What kind of person at 29 years old speaks to a mouse,

in those terms, about his own life?

It's staggering. It's absolutely staggering.

The day of the event may have arrived,

but wherever the Burns Supper takes place, the first task is to

transform a modern hotel ballroom into a little Scottish haven.

Sri Lankan Society Secretary Ayne-Marie married a Scotsman

while living in Abu Dhabi

and has now become an expert on how to prepare for the perfect

Burns Supper, even though she's never lived in Scotland.

No. No, we've got only 16.

This is an old building.

But it's still very nice. I think it'll keep in with Burns.

It'll fit in with the theme of the evening.

Which is a little dated, not modern.

And once we have all this tartan up on all the panes, it'll be lovely.

But you know, once in Abu Dhabi, somebody nicked the Lion Rampant.

We just want to try and have some memorabilia in the room, you know?

We've got a huge saltire as well.

We'll see if we can get it in the foyer.

It's just too big. Too big.

Shalini, they've got big ones.

Tonight, Shalini's main job is the reply from the lassies,

but before then, she has to get everything ready on time

and looking authentic.

We improvise lots. And I think it's fun in that way,

because we do have to make do with what we have.

It's very authentic. But we think creatively.

The recipe is very similar to tablet.

It's made with sugar, condensed milk, and we also add cashew nuts.

This is locally-made fabric.

It's not real tartan at all. It's very thin cotton.

Neeps has been a combination of pumpkin and our local turnip,

which is stronger than a regular neep.

Ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding for the haggis.

THEY HUM SCOTLAND THE BRAVE

I prefer Drambuie in my haggis. Isn't that wicked?

Totally wicked. I love it.

Can't wait till tonight to have my haggis main course. Lovely.

Please be upstanding so we can drink a toast to the haggis.

Put it in. OK. And then I'll say, "To the haggis."

And then I'll pass it to you. To the haggis.

-Are you not going to drink first?

-I'll drink first.

So I'll pass it on. I don't need to say anything though?

Are we going to still do the toast too

-or just keep it to haggis, haggis, haggis?

-Yeah.

And yet again,

the haggis is creating a challenge.

Here in Singapore,

the chef is battling the delights of tinned haggis.

HE GROANS

That one needs cooked through a bit for the ceremony,

but it's not to be eaten.

OK.

That's the one that had been used at the ball.

So it's already been stabbed and refrozen. It's just a dummy.

Because Jim had to use the one that had been refrozen last year,

he stabbed into it, and what was it he said?

"Oh, that really is reekin'!"

THEY LAUGH

HE LAUGHS

Yeah, you can smell this one.

I think being a lady chieftain

is different from being a male chieftain

in that the husband sort of trots along behind you.

Whereas, if you're the male chieftain, then

it's your wife that's often doing all the work behind the scenes.

I brought every single piece cos I didn't know how much we would need.

That looks like a squiggly caterpillar.

This is just the crest of the society.

Look how long we've been going - 1835.

SHE LAUGHS

-OK.

-And this is Gaelic, the language from Scotland.

-And it means "a thousand welcomes".

-Right, OK.

-Do we think that looks OK?

-Tricia!

We've already given final numbers in, so yes,

there's no refund at this stage.

Not only has Tricia got to recite the address to the haggis tonight,

she's set herself the task of learning another,

if less well-known, Robert Burns poem.

When first my brave Johnie lad came to this town

He had a blue bonnet that wanted the crown

But now he has gotten a hat and a feather

Hey, brave Johnie lad, cock up your beaver!

It's a very short poem and it just dances along.

And it's got, you know...

It would appeal to some people's senses of humour.

Cock up your beaver.

SHE SNIGGERS

MUSIC: "Scotland The Brave"

As the sun sets on Accra, just hours before the supper begins,

Chieftain Steve has to deliver a very unconventional prop

for the traditional centrepiece.

I just need to collect the sword for Rob,

who is doing the address to the haggis.

This has been very kindly loaned to us by the Ghana Military Academy.

-Good evening. How are you doing, Rob?

-Good to see you. Come in.

-One ceremonial sword for you.

-Thank you so much.

-That is beautiful.

-It is. Look at the crest of Ghana.

It is absolutely gorgeous.

That is a work of art.

-Anyway, a suitable implement to stab the haggis.

-Exactly.

-Welcome to Ghana.

-Thank you very much.

The last visitors to arrive in Ghana are tonight's band,

who've been flown over especially from Scotland.

Clearly the weather's very different to what they've left behind.

JAUNTY SCOTTISH COUNTRY MUSIC

Having celebrated an amazing 38 in Ghana since leaving Shetland,

Brenda has become an expert on the uniqueness of Burns Suppers.

St Andrew's Day is celebrating your flag -

your Scottish Saltire - the blue and white cross.

Celebrating your nationality, it's a more regal, sophisticated affair.

Burns Night is very much celebrating the wonderful life of Robert Burns.

It's a more colourful, more personal, more passionate night.

The speeches are meant to be humorous.

If you're lucky and you get good people to make the speeches,

the Toast To The Lassies,

given by a man who's really good at teasing women,

is ten minutes of ecstasy.

Please take your seats and welcome the high table.

PIPER PLAYS

AUDIENCE CLAP IN TIME

4,500 miles away, with just minutes to go,

organiser Claire isn't just worried about her hair.

The special guest is about to arrive.

I just have to fix my hair quickly.

And then go receive the governor.

It's a nice night. There's people there already.

I can see a few kilts.

Claire's main task this evening is to welcome Bermuda's new

Scottish governor to his first Burns Supper on the island.

What I've done, Claire, I've got the governor sitting here, facing front,

with Mrs Ferguson. You to his left with Mark.

Good evening, Governor Ferguson.

-I'm Claire, the vice president of the Caledonian Society.

-Good to see you.

You'll be having to listen to my terrible dinner conversation

all night. Sorry about that.

I'm going to be a lot better when you top me up one more time.

It's another Burns Night, a Burns Supper in Bermuda,

which always causes a big thrill, a big event, a big happiness,

blah, blah, blah. We can be Scottish with apology to nobody.

I'm wearing...black...Grey Douglas.

Cos one of my relatives was a Douglas. That's my excuse.

I just love black.

And this is the only tartan that's black and grey in the whole world.

-Black is beautiful.

-So there you have it. Black is beautiful.

PIPER PLAYS

I'm from South Carolina but I'm Scottish, actually.

My heritage is Scottish. So this is the biggest moment of my life.

Thank you!

CONVERSATION OBSCURED BY MUSIC

-Good to see you.

-Good to see you.

MUSIC STOPS

Ladies and gentlemen!

It's not going to work. Keep piping.

BAGPIPES PLAY

On the other side of the world, it's a big moment for 11-year-old

Singaporean piper Ranen and his family.

I'm feeling a bit nervous. There are a few hundred guests.

Once, at home, he was practising and he didn't really focus.

So I asked him.

I said, "This is a practice session, why don't you try to focus?

"Do it a bit better." And he said, "Yeah, but there's no audience."

THEY LAUGH

-How are you?

-Yeah, good.

INDISTINCT CHATTER

SHARP INTAKE OF BREATH

INDISTINCT CHATTER

I'm panicking.

PIPER PLAYS

Isn't he a star?! He's wonderful. An 11-year-old boy from Singapore

and he's playing the pipes like a real trooper. Just fantastic.

Well done. Very good. Very good.

Bagpipe music, once a year, is always enjoyable.

HE SIGHS

Instead of my saying the Selkirk Grace,

we could have a little Burns tutorial right at the beginning

of the evening. And we could all say it together.

So you'll need to be able to roll your Rs

to get the best pronunciation.

ALL: Some hae meat and canna eat

And some wad eat that want it

But we hae meat and we can eat

So let the Lord be thankit

Amen. Well done.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Burns was an internationalist.

So I'd like to think that he would enjoy

the international company that's gathered here.

I think he would maybe tease us about

that we take ourselves a wee bit too seriously.

What I'd like you to do in traditional, true Scottish fashion

is, please, stand.

Please have a drink ready.

BAGPIPES START UP

Ladies and gentlemen, the haggis.

PIPER PLAYS: "Scotland The Brave"

DINERS CLAP IN TIME

THEY APPLAUD AND CHEER

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,

Great chieftain o the puddin'-race!

Aboon them a' ye tak your place, Painch, tripe, or thairm:

Weel are ye worthy o' a grace As lang's my arm.

His knife...

His... His knife...

Oh...

LAUGHTER

Thank you.

His knife

see rustic Labour dight,

An cut you up wi ready slight,

Trenching your gushing entrails bright,

Like onie ditch;

And then, O what a glorious sight,

Warm

reekin, rich!

To the haggis!

The haggis!

-The haggis!

-The haggis!

ALL: The haggis!

Do you understand the haggis thing?

It's like... Can you explain that to me?

You sacrificed a haggis.

All I heard was the word "entrails".

-That was enough for me.

-I can't wait to eat it.

MUSIC: "Save The Bees" by Lau

-To the chef.

-Cheers.

-Thank you very much.

Rose has never had haggis before.

We told her it was a little bird that had two short front legs

and two long back legs,

and the short legs are so it can run up and down the hills properly.

We eat birds, a lot of birds in the Chinese culture.

Is this the one we just sacrificed?

We make a particular point of saying,

"Please put a decent amount of haggis on the plate."

So, what's come out this evening

but a one wee scoop of ice-cream sized haggis?!

It's like three Scottish mountains.

I've never had Glenfiddich in my haggis

but this time I thought I'd try cos I didn't have Drambuie.

But it was awesome cos I LOVE haggis

and it was FABULOUS.

Absolutely fabulous.

Chin-chin. Slainte.

Tonight, along with

hundreds of thousands of people unnamed throughout the world,

we remember one of the most fascinating and absorbing

human beings who ever lived - Robert Burns.

So please give a warm, encouraging welcome

to a really fine young man,

who will bring the toast to the Immortal Memory of Robert Burns -

Mark Lavery. CHEERING

MARK CLEARS THROAT

I am Scot of the diaspora.

Genetically diluted,

linguistically challenged

and culturally, in some cases, deprived.

A Burns poem has the ability to speak to the heart of his readers,

and not just the Scottish heart,

but to the hearts of people all over the world.

I guess one of the portions of Robert Burns's poems

that really speaks to me comes near the closing of Ae Fond Kiss.

When he says to his...his love...

Had we never loved so kindly,

Had we never loved so blindly,

Never met, never parted

We'd have never been broken-hearted.

It's something that I think I feel

every time I go to the airport and, in Scotland,

every time I'm getting ready to leave my family and my friends.

I think what Robert Burns is saying there is...

it hurts to say goodbye

when you know what you're giving up.

MUSIC: "Ghosts" by Lau

Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you now to fill your glasses.

Fill them up to the very brim.

Raise them as high as you can.

As I give you the greatest Scottish toast of them all.

To the Immortal Memory of Robert Burns.

-ALL:

-To the Immortal Memory of Robert Burns.

# And I'm no' turning, come on

# My parents were ghosts

# And, sir, I was born here

# So where would I go? #

MUSIC ENDS

Oh... You know when you've spent

15 years in a place

'and your children have been young and grown up?

'I can remember so much.

'And then, when you see the pictures and hear the music,'

it is very special -

the times in Scotland.

Shalini, where are you?

Shalini Wickramasuriya by name is not Scottish,

has spent many years in Scotland

and is very worthy of this stage. Shalini.

APPLAUSE

The last tradition of the supper

is the Toast to the Lassies along with the reply.

And even that ritual reaches across the globe.

-WOMAN:

-Come on, my girl! Come on!

LAUGHTER

For us laddies, the language of the lassies

is far too complex for us to comprehend.

"We need to talk"

actually means "You're in big trouble."

LAUGHTER

Men, on the other hand,

are much simpler beings.

"I am hungry" actually means "I am hungry."

LAUGHTER

A man can be a useful thing, no woman can deny.

They work so hard from dawn to dusk

and still put dinner on the table,

and sort the kids, and clean the house,

and all those things that us lassies...

DROWNED OUT BY LAUGHTER

Gentlemen, what would we or Rabbie do without our lassies?

Without the lassies, then there would be no poems.

Without the poems, there would be no poet.

Without the poet and the lassies,

we wouldn't be here today.

Gentlemen, I would ask that you be upstanding

and raise a toast

to the lassies.

-ALL:

-To the lassies.

ACCORDION PLAYS TRADITIONAL CEILIDH MUSIC

In Ghana, the formalities of the evening are over.

Now it's time to dance

and you don't have to be a Scot to ceilidh.

I think there is a superb marriage of

the Ghanaian culture and the Scottish culture.

Ghanaians are very warm and hospitable people

and the same can be said about the Scots.

And so I think that is one important element of how the society

here in Ghana has survived for so many years.

As the evening draws to a close,

the Ghanaian guest of honour wants to reflect on Burns.

I think the primary thing to think of here is tradition being kept.

And, um...

tradition becomes a bond.

And I think that's...that's what we're celebrating here

is the bond of the Scottish society even within Ghana.

And we're not different than the Scottish really when you look at it.

Because, like Robert Burns was saying,

you are thinking about

romance, humanity,

and basically caring for each other.

And I think Ghanaian society is the same.

So we are one human race.

Please note that beer and wine and soft drinks

will be served through to the end when we sing Auld Lang Syne.

Famous Grouse whisky will be available while Scots last...

stocks last.

-Oh, dear.

-LAUGHTER

CHEERING

# And I would walk 500 miles

# And I would walk 500 more... #

As the evenings progress and the whisky kicks in,

Burns gets put to one side for a few moments,

and a celebration of modern Scotland takes over.

Are you ready? # Da-na da-ra da-ra-da

# Da-na da-ra da-ra-da... #

ALL JOIN IN

They are having fun and we are having fun serving them, so...

everyone's having fun!

This is Burns Supper.

'I am extremely proud to be Scottish.

'You know, this vocabulary, the accent'

it's home, it's roots, it's Mum, it's my family,

my sisters are there and, er,

and there's that draw all the time...

..to go home

basically.

ALL SING: # Should auld acquaintance be forgot

# And never brought to mind...? #

The venues may be thousands of miles apart

but the evenings all finish in exactly the same way.

# ..For auld lang syne... #

We do tend to leave home, but we never leave home behind us

in terms of taking it with us.

Here we go!

'Burns fundamentally gives us our Scottishness,

'he is, without a shadow of a doubt,

'one of the anchors of being Scottish,'

something in which Scots can take tremendous pride

because of now what we could term to be the universality of Robert Burns.

# ..We'll tak a cup o' kindness yet For auld lang syne. #

I am very Scottish. I am not Sri Lankan.

No, no.

I feel more Scottish than ever now.

# ..We'll tak a cup o' kindness yet For auld lang syne. #

CHEERING

But, for one Scot, the longing for home will soon be over.

John knows that his next Burns Supper will be in Scotland.

You can be in exile for so long and talk about Scotland.

You have to go back and get your feet on the ground and be Scottish again.

So I think it's my turn to get my feet back on Scottish soil.

MUSIC: "Horizontigo" by Lau

THEY CHEER

I tell you what, Robert Burns would have stood up there crying.

He would have stood there crying.

You know, 200 years on or whatever it's been,

the guy would've been overwhelmed with the response tonight.

'What would he say? He would say, "The best of company.

'"Good food. Good drink. Good music.'

"A night well spent.

"Thank you every much."

"HORIZONTIGO" CONTINUES